David's Marriage Pact

Summary

VIEWS with David Dobrik & Jason Nash

Episode: David's Marriage Pact
Date: July 2, 2026

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Overview

This episode of VIEWS is classic David and Jason: a blend of personal updates, brutally honest friendship banter, behind-the-scenes content creation chat, and off-kilter humor. Special guests Natalie and Ilya join to riff about relationships, career anxieties, David’s infamous “marriage pact,” viral TikToks, the wild business of pitching to billionaires—and, yes, awkward bathroom confessions. The crew brings their signature blend of sarcasm and sincerity as they navigate love, internet fame, and what it means to grow up in the digital age.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Video Podcasts: Why Don't They Do It?

• Opening Banter: Briefly address why they don't do video podcasts, joking about the vulnerability of being on camera (“I call Natalie a bitch. People will be able to see that it actually hurts her.” – David, [00:34]).
• Decision: The group agrees, in tongue-in-cheek fashion, that video podcasts aren’t their thing.

2. Natalie's Single Status, Relationship Pressure, and Future Plans

• Natalie's Love Life: The group playfully—and then seriously—discusses Natalie’s relationship status and the societal (and biological) pressures of turning 30.
  • “When are you gonna get a boyfriend? ...I mean this in the most loving way possible.” – Ilya, [02:01]
  • "This is actually arguably worse than calling a woman fat." – David, [02:09]
• Biological Clock: Elle jokes about “eggs drying up,” leading to a quick discussion about freezing eggs and celebrity pregnancies over 40.
• Reflections on Family Planning: Natalie shares a desire for kids but is not willing to compromise happiness or settle. She’s open to adoption if she doesn’t find the right partner: “Maybe I’ll fucking adopt.” – Natalie, [08:04]

3. Behind-the-Scenes at a Billionaire Pitch Event

• Sundance Experience: David and Natalie recount attending a pitch event with billionaires at Sundance, describing the surreal nature of asking for $5-$30 million for film projects.
  • “You could be the sole owner of the show if you write the check for $5 million today.” – Jason, [05:00]
• Reflections: Both are wowed by the stakes and straightforwardness of big-money entertainment deals.

4. On the Elusive “Perfect Partner”

• Admiration: David and Natalie discuss the magnetic qualities of a “perfect guy” they met—accomplished, humble, and family-oriented.
• Reality Check: Natalie insists she won’t settle just for the sake of having a family (“...not at the expense of my happiness.” – Natalie, [07:41]).

5. The David/Olivia Jade Marriage Pact

• The Pact: David reveals he and Olivia Jade have a mutual agreement to marry at 34 if neither is wed.
  • “Olivia Jade and I have a pact that if no one’s married by the age of 34—” – David, [11:09]
  • “She made that pact for a reason. She’s like, there’s no fucking way I will be married.” – Jason, [11:25]
• Group Predictions: The friends debate the likelihood of such “fallback” plans coming true.

6. Clickbait & Vlogging: Kissing in Thumbnails and Editing Woes

• Viewer Question: David addresses why he chose to put a real-life kiss in the thumbnail and title of his vlog.
  • “I kissed Georgia in my new video…Remember when you watched that part? You couldn’t believe that I kissed a girl.” – David, [12:10]
• Thumbnail Tactics: He admits to altering hair color to avoid spoiling “who” the kiss is with—classic YouTube misdirection—then laments the pressures of topping viral clickbait.
• Editing Anxiety: David opens up about classic “catastrophizing” every upload and how losing in a pickleball tournament soured his view of a recent vlog: “It was the root of all the problems…” [15:06]
  • “You make it so miserable for you, for Natalie, for everyone around you.” – Jason, [14:14]

7. Frozen in Time: The Child Star Dilemma

• Personal Growth: David reflects on feeling “frozen in time,” like many who hit fame young, and wonders if he’d be different in a “normal” career.
  • “I was doomed and destined to be frozen in time, and I’m lucky that I found the job where frozen in time benefits me.” – David, [17:35]

8. SteveWillDoIt & The Dark Side of High-Stake Gambling

• Wild Bets: The group discusses YouTuber SteveWillDoIt betting millions during the World Cup.
  • “He bet $2 million…only to win a million dollars.” – David, [21:07]
• Concern: Jason voices concern over the sustainability and risks of operating at such extremes (“I worry that…that kind of lifestyle will…it’ll catch up with you.” – Jason, [22:52]).
• Unique Content: David credits Steve and Togi for having “the most one of one videos on YouTube.” [23:18]

9. Bathroom Confessions & Podcast Mishaps

• Confession: Jason admits to being the source of a terrible smell in the podcast room, causing a humorous, awkward recount of everyone blaming “the room,” with Taylor roped in as a “professional sniffer.”
  • “This is crazy that you would say this knowing it’s your own feces.” – David, [25:32]

10. On Self-Improvement: Natalie Quits Weed

• Personal Update: Natalie shares that she’s quit weed (“Every night I used to smoke to go to bed…It’s been one or two months.” – Natalie, [36:57])
• Group Observations: The crew gently debates if she seems any different—more alive? “Just throw me a compliment, you know?” – Natalie, [37:54]

11. Nostalgia: Teen Weed Stories & the Perils of Adult Indulgence

• Story Time: David fondly remembers the thrill of buying weed as a teen, when limited funds meant $5 Taco Bell was a luxury. Now, Doordash is “dangerous” for the munchies.
  • “It’s so incredibly dangerous.” – David, [39:57]

12. Randomness: GTA6, Female Uber Drivers, and American Fortunes

• GTA6 Server Myths: Discussion on the wild rumors surrounding GTA6’s potential to make millionaires and whether virtual crime will translate to real money.
• Female Ubers: Jason, with typical dad energy, marvels you can now request female Uber drivers for safety.
• America’s 250th: David and Natalie, after all the chaos, close by (sincerely?) expressing gratitude for living in the US: “We’re very, very…fortunate to be living here…I could do probably 10 more ‘verys’.” – David, [43:08]

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Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• “When are you gonna get a boyfriend?...I mean this in the most loving way possible.” – Ilya, [02:01]
• “This is actually arguably worse than calling a woman fat.” – David, [02:09]
• “Olivia Jade and I have a pact that if no one’s married by the age of 34—” – David, [11:09]
• “She made that pact for a reason. She’s like, there’s no fucking way I will be married.” – Jason, [11:25]
• “You make it so miserable for you, for Natalie, for everyone around you.” – Jason, [14:14]
• “I was doomed and destined to be frozen in time, and I’m lucky that I found the job where frozen in time benefits me.” – David, [17:35]
• “He bet $2 million…only to win a million dollars.” – David, [21:07]
• “I don’t want it to end poorly for Steve, obviously.” – Jason, [22:05]
• “This is crazy that you would say this knowing it’s your own feces.” – David, [25:32]
• “Every night I used to smoke to go to bed…It’s been one or two months.” – Natalie, [36:57]
• “It’s so incredibly dangerous.” – David, on high-THC weed and Doordash, [39:57]
• “We’re very, very…fortunate to be living here…I could do probably 10 more ‘verys’.” – David, [43:08]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [02:01] – Relationship pressure on Natalie, “When are you gonna get a boyfriend?”
• [05:00] – Inside the billionaire pitch event at Sundance
• [08:04] – Natalie considers adopting if she doesn’t find the right person
• [11:09] – David reveals his marriage pact with Olivia Jade
• [12:10] – Vlog clickbait: David discusses kissing Georgia on camera
• [14:14] – Jason confronts David’s “catastrophizing” and misery spiral around vlogs
• [17:35] – David on being “frozen in time” as an internet star
• [21:07] – SteveWillDoIt’s $2 million bet and worries about betting culture
• [25:32] – Jason’s “shit room” confession and group realization
• [36:57] – Natalie shares about quitting weed and group reactions
• [39:57] – David on the dangers of weed munchies as an adult
• [43:08] – Grateful (mostly) take on America and its “250th” birthday

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Tone & Language

This episode is full of sarcastic jabs, self-deprecating humor, candid vulnerability, and moments of real warmth. The hosts freely interrupt, joke, and needle each other, but remain open about deeper feelings—especially regarding relationships, self-worth, and growing older (online and offline).

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Summary

This “David’s Marriage Pact” episode is a perfect snapshot of VIEWS: friends busting each other’s chops, lightly grappling with modern adulthood, and veering between chaos and introspection. Whether you care about YouTube thumbnail strategy, TikTok glam, high-roller bets, or simply enjoy listening to people lovingly roast each other while navigating life in the internet fast lane, this episode is classic “Views.”

Transcript

[A]

Views.

[B]

What's up, guys? Welcome back to Views. The podcast is back, this time with a brand new attitude because Natalie's here and Jason and Dave and Ilia.

[C]

It's about a question. Yeah, whatever happened to the video podcast?

[B]

Oh, oh my gosh.

[A]

We don't talk about it.

[B]

We don't talk about that.

[A]

Get this guy out of here.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Boom. What the are you saying, man? We'll fucking do video podcasts around here. Oh, you don't want to do it, Jay? I don't want to do it, man. It's so dumb.

[B]

Please, Jake.

[A]

Money.

[B]

Jake, can we please do it?

[A]

No. No, I'm not doing it. You know, you don't know what it will be like. It'll be so different. I call Natalie a bitch. People will be able to see that it actually hurts her.

[B]

All right, guys, so I wanted to start with some somebody that wrote in. This was a good question. Hey, Jason. Oh, I just posted a new vlog, so go check that out. Ilya posted a new transformation And Natalie posted 17 new TikToks on a yacht, flexing.

[A]

I just watched her reel from Con. It was amazing.

[B]

Really?

[A]

I thought we should review it today and just maybe play it.

[C]

Who edits them?

[D]

My sister.

[C]

Pretty good.

[D]

Really?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

He's beautiful shots.

[B]

Beautiful shots.

[D]

He watches every single one. You're a fan, aren't you?

[B]

I watch them just with fits of rage. Oh, tell me, like, when did she shoot this shit? Like today she was late today. She was late to podcast and I know she was filming a get ready with me.

[D]

No, 1000% was on four different Zoom calls this meeting.

[C]

Yeah, I had a valid concern the other day about you, Nat.

[A]

Really?

[D]

What was it about?

[C]

Yeah, well, I was like. I mean, I mean this in the most loving way possible.

[D]

Oh, God, that's gonna be fun. I love those.

[B]

I love, I love when things start like that. That's how, that's how I got into the Zela transformation. Because Joe Vulpus called me and he goes, hey, can I say something? And I mean this, not out of the kindness of my own heart. And then he sends me a screenshot of me on FaceTime with him and sends me a picture of my chin. I was like, holy fuck. Alright, go fire.

[C]

Well, I'm not gonna call Natalie fat here.

[B]

That's not what I'm doing.

[A]

Meanwhile, Ilya looks like Scared Straight right now with that rapper. Not.

[C]

She's actually not. Anyways, when are you gonna get a boyfriend? Because, like, I was thinking about like,

[B]

you're 30, you know, this is actually arguably worse than calling a woman fat.

[C]

All right.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

And I'm just, like, a little bit concerned.

[D]

You're concerned for me?

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

You know, I was actually thinking. We were at this, like, conference or whatever yesterday, and there was a lot of, like, a lot of wealthy people in this room. And I was looking at all of them, and I was like, I would rather. I think, just. I don't even, like, care to get to know somebody.

[C]

What? Why?

[B]

Dude, I'm literally rubbing off on her so much. It's really weird.

[A]

Yeah, it's really weird.

[D]

It just takes a lot of.

[B]

You're saying some weird David shit right now. It takes up, what, a lot of energy?

[D]

No, because.

[B]

And what, you don't like going places? You like staying at home?

[A]

No, I don't like hanging out with John.

[D]

No, I'm not. I'm not saying it in the same. If I found somebody, like, if. I genuinely. I just don't think that. I just. It's gonna be so fucking hard to find somebody that's gonna, like, connect in my.

[C]

Well, that's why you have to start now, because I was thinking about it, like, you.

[D]

You.

[C]

If you're gonna have kids, right, you have to have them before, like, you're 35. 36 at most.

[A]

Wait, why?

[B]

Why?

[C]

Because their eggs dry up, bro.

[B]

But you can freeze them.

[D]

I could freeze my eggs? Yeah. Oh, it's expensive, though. It's like 20, 25 grand.

[C]

Wait, how long does that last, though? Like, how long do your frozen eggs last?

[D]

I think a good amount of time.

[B]

I think forever.

[D]

Yeah, I don't. I don't know. I'm not a fucking doctor.

[B]

Do you think Walt Disney could have sold his. Oh, he's an ex, you know, who

[C]

just got pregnant, which I was like, whoa, what the fuck? And Hathaway.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Wait, what?

[D]

She has, like, 40.

[C]

She's, like, 45.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah, bro.

[B]

I don't know why that's crazy, you know?

[C]

Like, being pregnant at 45 is crazy.

[D]

I. I guess.

[B]

I don't really know, like, when pregnancies happen, I mean.

[C]

Jay.

[A]

Are you guys talking really softly, or am I, like, dying? This is the most chill because we're all sitting over here just, like, natal, you know, softly.

[B]

Or am I dying? Okay, I'll lean in a little. Really funny. You're just fading out.

[D]

You definitely have, like, 10 years. But it's okay. I feel.

[B]

Wait, let me talk about this. We were at this.

[D]

We're talking about myself.

[B]

No, no. I wanted. I wanted to. So I've Been getting my backhand in. Pickleball has been getting way sharper.

[A]

Oh, yes. I love when you talk about pickleball.

[B]

No, I'm actually. I'm coming to your aid here. We were at an event with a bunch of billionaires last night, and. Which was really strange. I've never been to anything like this. Can we talk about where it is, what it is?

[D]

Yeah, of course.

[B]

It was at Sundance, and basically all these people come up. We flew in for the day for this thing. You go up on stage and you pitch your movie to, like, 60, 70, 80 billionaires.

[D]

Yeah. You have to pay to participate in this function. Right. But you're getting access to a room of billionaires that. That fund entertainment projects.

[A]

Were you pitching a movie?

[B]

We were helping a friend pitch a show.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

So. So we were there, and like, a big director that you've heard of would be like, I want to work on the small project that's very dear to my heart. It's about, let's say, my daughter, whatever. And he'd be like, I need $5 million. I haven't raised from anybody. And you could be the sole owner of the show if you write the check for $5 million today. Which is, like, so crazy because, like, I'm terrified of raising money. Like, I. When Allie's like, we're raising money for this, like, ask some friends. I'm like, I don't want to ask anybody. Like, I feel like you're, like, pigeon pigeonholing people into it. I feel really bad. But, like, this was. I've never witnessed this. It was like, I'm asking 5 million. Like, it was like, I don't know. It wasn't even. It wasn't even like a Shark Tank vibe. It was just like, here it is.

[D]

Take it or leave it.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

The presentations, like, 10, 15 minutes, show,

[A]

video, or just talk.

[D]

Some of them, like, some of them had, like, some of them had actors, like, notable actors that you would know that are already attached to the project.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Would, like, come in on Zoom.

[D]

Come in on Zoom and be like,

[B]

this is why we want to do this together. And then. And it would be interesting because there'd be like. So some guy, like, really wanted to bring this woman's books to life, like, that she wrote, like, 40 years ago or something. And he'd show all the books, and he'd read a synopsis of the books, and then he'd be like, I want to turn these into films, and I need $30 million to make it work. And you'd be like, what the fuck?

[A]

Damn.

[B]

It's kind of crazy. Like, I get products.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But like, movies and shows and stuff like that was like, so bizarre for me to watch.

[D]

It's such a cavalc.

[A]

Why is that bizarre?

[B]

I don't know. I guess the people, the rooms he's pitching it to are also like, so rich. Where like, they're. They're kind of down to like.

[C]

Was it like a bidding process or was it kind of like.

[B]

No, it's like. It's like, come see me at lunch.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

If I was a billionaire and I saw you on stage and you're like, I want to make a movie about Steely Dan.

[B]

No, totally. I get it.

[A]

I'd be like, I'm down.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? Like, let's fucking go. How much do you need?

[B]

No, no, I totally get it. It was just a very insane experience. But there was one guy that I thought I really liked. The guy. Actually. We went to go pitch the Pitch a show for. That's like the perfect guy for you.

[D]

Yeah, yeah, I know.

[A]

Same age.

[D]

No, he's. He's married with kids.

[B]

He's married with kids. He's so charming and so nice.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

I was like, damn, Natalie found a guy like this, it'd be game over.

[D]

Yeah, for sure. But that is like so hard to find people like that.

[C]

Wait, why?

[D]

Why?

[C]

What was like, special about him?

[D]

He was really good looking, but he was like. He was like dad energy, but still. And he's like, I think he's 40 but very handsome.

[A]

Date a 40 year old if he

[D]

looked like that guy. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

He was just very driven, but like, not an obnoxious way at all.

[D]

Yeah, not annoying. He's. He's made great money and he's like, very passionate, very motivated, very driven, very successful. But not like in your face. Not like showboaty with it.

[B]

Just like, you wouldn't be able to tell. Yeah, no, he's very nice. But. Wait, why? Well, you didn't like anybody else there? What was freaking you out about everyone?

[D]

Well, it's just like. Well, because I think for like, I don't know, I just. I'm entering 30 and yes, I do want a family and I do want kids. So that is like at the back of my mind. Right. But at the same time I'm like, I don't think that I want that at the expense of like, my happiness. So if I don't find somebody like super soon to have kids, then, like, so be it. Maybe I'll fucking adopt.

[B]

Adopt.

[D]

I'D love to adopt.

[A]

Really?

[D]

I've always wanted to adopt.

[B]

That's like, very nice of you, but you don't want your own.

[D]

No, I do, I do.

[B]

I do kind of get like. I kind of have, like. Get two of your own and then adopt.

[D]

No, for sure, the dream scenario. But like, honestly, whatever happens, happens. Like, I'm not. I'm not that stressed about it.

[B]

Wait, how old's your girlfriend at all?

[C]

26.

[B]

Okay, so maybe she's having the same thoughts and maybe she wants a kid from you.

[C]

No, I've checked.

[B]

Really?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

What have you.

[B]

You've asked her?

[A]

I gotta go, I gotta train.

[C]

Mechi, it's my time.

[B]

You don't think she wants kids right now?

[C]

Definitely not, no. She's going to business school right now.

[B]

Okay, when did she say that she wants to have kids? When do you plan on having kids?

[C]

I don't know, like 34, 35.

[B]

Damn, you think you're have kids in four years?

[C]

Maybe I don't want to have kids. Too late.

[D]

He's got it all planned and figured out.

[C]

No, I definitely don't.

[B]

Dude, he's so funny.

[A]

I hope you guys aren't just looking at billionaires.

[B]

Do you guys know that Ilya has gained.

[D]

No, no, definitely not. And that was my actually my like genuine realization in that room. Because I feel like a lot of times it's like, okay, maybe you could find somebody.

[C]

Yeah, I mean, let's go.

[B]

I like when.

[A]

Well, not. I mean, that's the thing is like you're going to find.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Because it feels like people are really getting their money's worth at a time.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Because like, you can listen to this

[A]

thing about David is never me. That's the thing about this David is it's a. It's a.

[B]

You listen to it once.

[D]

There's a big pattern through your left ear, pal. And it's generally spend lessen to your

[B]

right with David and you get me.

[A]

And did you hear what that girl, the Brazilian swimsuit model said about David?

[B]

Oh, hold on, let's talk over here. They may have beat us. What? What did she say?

[D]

No, I do worry that you are rubbing off on me. You know, when we were in Cannes, I was talking to like some of my colleagues or whatever, and they were like my colleagues.

[B]

Oh my God, you're so boring. I'm not rubbing off on you enough.

[D]

I was talking to them because they're like business friends and they were like, they're colleagues.

[B]

So funny.

[A]

What's wrong with colleagues?

[B]

Well, it's Just because she posts Instagram reels from her Kenya. And then she goes, my colleagues.

[D]

What I have. Why can't I have both? Why can't I be multifaceted? Why can't I be a woman?

[B]

Do you want to be a social media girly or do you want to be a businesswoman? Decide right now.

[D]

Wait, I'm literally. I'm both.

[C]

It's funny because David means it's.

[B]

I kind of do her.

[A]

TikTok was so interesting.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Today.

[D]

Did you see it? It was great. Did you watch it genuinely?

[B]

I told you earlier that I was watching it with rage, but that's not true. I actually passed by him at lightning speed.

[D]

You should watch it. You should watch the intro at least.

[A]

I mean, let's watch it right now.

[B]

No, Jay, this isn't a video. I hate when people do that. People pull up video on the pod.

[A]

The audio is funny enough.

[B]

I don't think you need to find anybody. Just stick with me.

[D]

I don't want it. I don't want to stick with you.

[C]

Well, I genuinely. I'm not even just saying this to be funny. I really do think you guys have a chance to end up together.

[B]

I know you don't think that. I know you don't think that.

[C]

There's like 10% of me that thinks that still.

[D]

Okay?

[A]

That's what my mom says.

[D]

Well, that's fine. 10% is, like, valid.

[C]

Because at the end of the day, there's a high chance that neither of you will find anybody.

[D]

You think?

[C]

But I'm not.

[B]

That's never, like, a concern for me. Like, oh, I want to get. Now I have to get marry somebody. And by the way, Olivia, Jade and I have a pack that if no one's married by the age of 34,

[D]

babe, she's gonna get wiped up real quick.

[A]

Olivia, Jade, it is gonna be gone.

[D]

The fact that you made a marriage pact with her is crazy.

[B]

Yeah, she signed it every day.

[A]

She made that pact for a reason. She's like, I, there's no fucking way I will be married.

[B]

Pressure on herself to put pressure on herself.

[D]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

I need to be married by 34 or he's coming for me.

[A]

I'm here. I'm outside. It's the eve of your 34th birthday.

[B]

No, listen, sorry, Ilya, I hate to break it to you.

[A]

Wanna go to Dobrik's?

[B]

Okay, so I got an email. Maybe Jason got it, but he sent it to me. He said, my name is Nathan from Australia. I just watched David's new vlog and I was wondering what the thought process was for having the big reveal, the kiss, be the thumbnail and title and not save it as a secret till the end of the vlog. I thought it'd be a fun question because I can only assume David's reasoning would be, in typical David fashion, unreasonable. It's fucked up, actually. There isn't much. Well, let me talk about. I kissed Georgia in my new video, Ilya. Remember when you watched that part? You looked at me weird. Yeah, yeah. You. You couldn't believe that I kissed a girl.

[C]

Well, I couldn't believe you kissed a girl and left it in.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, I guess. I. Natalie said that too. And then I was like, that's kind of strange. I was like, what's the big deal?

[D]

And I'm also like, what's the big deal? You're the most secret about your, like, intimacy.

[C]

Yeah, bro. You're weird, man.

[B]

Well, that's why I'm kind of like. That's why I'm kind of like, not like. I don't really care about that. I. I was weird about that when I was like, 23, 24, but, like, I'm 30 now.

[D]

You, like, makeup ages, like, 23, 24. Brother was. You were, like, still dating Liza at that point?

[B]

No, I wasn't.

[D]

Basically.

[B]

No, I was. I was literally single at, like, the 23. I was single. I was single, but I don't know, I just feel like, whatever.

[A]

I don't think it's a big deal.

[B]

I think it's a big deal either, but just to answer your question, I

[D]

don't think it's a big deal.

[B]

Of her hair. What?

[D]

I don't think it's a big deal at all. I just think that it was like. It's a shocking.

[C]

What did you say?

[B]

Well, in the thumbnail, I changed the color of Georgia's hair. So you don't know it was her. I thought the kiss would be a good clickbait, but I just. I had to change the color of her hair. Cause I didn't want people to assume it was Georgia. I wanted to look like either Natalie or Cindy.

[C]

Was it good click weight?

[B]

Yeah, it's working. It's unfortunate because it's working really well. And I think it's like our top possible thumbnail.

[A]

That's great.

[B]

Now it's kind of downhill from here, right? It's like, what else could we do? Unless I actually make out.

[C]

Natalie, that's the next step.

[D]

Wow. What a treat for me.

[A]

I have something to say about yesterday's video.

[C]

Yeah. What?

[A]

Well, the day before, you were, like, catastrophizing everything. We watched the video.

[B]

I love that word.

[A]

I told you it was good.

[B]

Nat, get a neon sign that says catastrophizing.

[A]

Yeah, well, you should get a neon sign, because that is you, brother. You have a sickness, and that is catastrophizing. So you sat there and you were like, this video's not fucking good. What the fuck? It's gonna be another two weeks. It's gonna be another two weeks before we get this video live. And I was like, it's good. It's good. You just gotta make some edits.

[D]

Blah, blah, blah.

[A]

So I left here like, man, Dave's in the shit. And then fucking yesterday, I see you in a fucking uber black, like, what's up, guys? New video. And you posted fucking 18 hours later, 12 hours later. So you fucking. You. You just made it like. You make it so miserable for you, for Natalie, for everyone around you. Natalie for Natalie. And. And it's just unnecessary. Like, I mean, like, the video's great.

[B]

Yeah, for sure. Can I tell you what happened?

[A]

Sure.

[B]

So I was editing, and then I was done. I was just like, I don't want to look at this video anymore. And then I stopped looking at it.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah. People really, really love this one.

[A]

Yeah, it's great.

[B]

Which was weird because I didn't like it. I thought it was three vlogs in one. It didn't make sense. I didn't like how it was formatted. I was. The whole thing was also tainted because I lost the pickleball tournament.

[A]

Right.

[D]

Well, that was the thing. That was. The root of all the problems is that you lost and therefore everything else.

[B]

I think. I think it ruined the video for me completely. I will never watch that video again.

[C]

That's so crazy that you think that way, because it was a doubles tournament, brother. It was a doubles.

[B]

I know.

[C]

You can't blame yourself for having a tournament.

[B]

I'm also not gonna blame Jamie Foxx. You can't.

[A]

You can't.

[C]

I'm saying, like, you just. You lost as a team. You didn't lose, like, solely.

[B]

I understand.

[A]

How did you lose that game, though?

[C]

Nice, Jay.

[D]

Way to bring it back up.

[A]

Like, what happened?

[C]

You'd be depressed for the next four days.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. It was in canon. People were like, how'd your tournament go?

[A]

I was shocked.

[B]

Huh?

[A]

I was shocked that they beat you.

[B]

It was crazy.

[D]

They were good, though.

[C]

Well, the other.

[A]

Great.

[C]

The other guy was really good.

[B]

What was more. What was more shocking is it was a game up to 15. Every point counted. So, like, it's. You don't just want to point on your serve. And we were down 13 to 4.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Which was crazy. And then we came back. 13. 13.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Then we tied up again at 14. 14. Tied up again at 15. 15. And then we were up 16, 15. Win by two. And then they won 16, 16. And then they won 17, 16. So we had match point everything, but it was just like.

[A]

They won 17, 16.

[C]

They won 18, 16.

[B]

Oh, 18, 16. We won. Yeah. Sorry. 18, 16. We won. Yeah.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

We came back and it was like. It was primed. It was ready for the vlog. It was like this great comeback, and then I lost it, and it was. I was more upset that I fucked up the vlog, obviously, than anything. And I was like, I. We. How would we edit this? And then ever since then, I was just like, I don't want to watch this video. But people really loved this last vlog. I was going through the comments, and they were like, this is maybe the best one yet, which I was pretty surprised about, but maybe I have actually no idea of what a good one makes a good vlog anymore. So I'm just gonna fuck off and just have them edited. And then I'll be like, yeah, go for it.

[C]

That's never gonna happen, brother.

[A]

The last podcast you mentioned you were frozen in time.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I kept thinking about that, like, why are you frozen in time? You're a young guy.

[B]

I think any. But I don't think that's a bad thing.

[A]

You don't know.

[B]

I love it.

[A]

Guys, what do you think being frozen in time, is that a good thing?

[B]

Well, I think, like, a lot of, like, you watch, like, how a lot of, like, Disney stars interact or, like, a lot of people that, like, started their. Started their public careers early, I think are frozen in that thing that people fell in love with.

[D]

Right.

[B]

Because I think, like, in the back of their head. Yes. Like, it's keeping them there because it's like, people like this.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What got me started, this is my job. So I think a lot of Disney stars kind of have that same mindset, and I don't know, it's hard to tell of whether or not I would be a different person if I had a job in finance. I just don't think that that would ever happen. I think I was doomed and destined to be frozen in time, and I'm lucky that I found the job where frozen in time benefits me. So, yes, I still love Buzz Lightyear. I still cry at Toy Story. And I. And I still want to watch how to Train youn Dragon.

[A]

No, no, no, no, that's fine. You wanna. You wanna like things that you liked as a kid. That's fine. That's not what I'm talking about. We were talking about something the other day, how you operate in life, and you said, I'm frozen in time. And. And those are the things that I think you should look at and change.

[B]

Yeah, I'll check it out.

[D]

Okay,

[A]

awesome. When can you get back to me?

[B]

When do you want.

[A]

How's. Like, later tonight? Maybe we'll get together, we can talk for a couple hours. Well, amazing. How's 10:30?

[B]

I'm watching Supergirl at 10:00pm you are? Yeah. We had to move it.

[D]

You know what's funny?

[B]

What?

[D]

I walked into this podcast at the beginning, and I turned to Jason and I just mouthed, I hate him in reference to you and. Because you're annoying me. And. And it's funny because I know that he comes in here and he does the podcast every day. Right. Because his. What he said back to me. I said, I hate him. And he goes, he's the worst.

[A]

No, I said, he's rough.

[D]

He's rough.

[A]

He's rough.

[D]

Yeah. And I thought that was so funny because for me, like, obviously our friendship has gone on for so long and, like, whatever, but for him, like, it's funny, the difference in our relationship. Like, yes, you can have the same frustrations as I do with him.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

But, like, you come in, you do the podcast, you sit down, you do the thing, and you carry on with your day. But, like, for me, there's, like, so much emotional volatility that's, like, involved.

[B]

Okay, what is this Attack David day?

[A]

Well, I was trying to help you.

[B]

You can hate him, but you can get away.

[A]

You are stuck here.

[B]

I'm trying. I'm trying.

[D]

It wasn't really what I was trying to say, but I guess that might actually subconsciously be my point. So thank you for helping me.

[B]

So you're jealous that Jason gets to leave at the end of these podcasts?

[A]

We switch lives for the day.

[C]

If you want to.

[B]

You know, it was so funny. I was trying to convince Ilya to come with me to. How's this? Haha twice. Oh, I was trying to convince him to come with me to the Hamptons.

[D]

I need to start over.

[B]

No, no, the haha twice is. I'm referring to the text message that I sent. He haha'd and I haha'ded. Cause I thought it was Funny. Even though I sent it, which is kinda weird.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

I said. He's like, is it just you and Nat going? And I said, yeah. Jonah and Georgia are also going to the Hamptons. I said, but everyone's gonna be there. Cause Michael R. Ruben is having a white party and Taylor Swift's wedding. And then before he responds, I go, I'm not invited to those. But I'm just saying that's why people are in town. But it was like a really funny David way to conceptualize this cool thing's happening. I have nothing to do with it.

[A]

Let me dazzle him with some events

[B]

that I'm not invited to. Yeah. I was telling Ilya the possibilities of what could happen at the Hamptons, but. But yeah. Should we cut over to Steve will Do it news?

[A]

Sure.

[B]

He's making a lot of money right now.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Yeah. He's been betting. He bet $2 million. $2 million? Yeah, on Mexico to beat Ecuador in the World Cup.

[A]

That was yesterday, right?

[B]

Yeah. Only to win a million dollars.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

You understand how much money that is? Jay. Jay's really worried about Steve will do it.

[D]

Really?

[A]

You know what? Yeah, I am.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I worry about him.

[B]

Jay doesn't think it will end well.

[A]

I don't. And I'm surprised that you're saying that publicly on this podcast. But I'll be real. And I'll say that's a very. Here's the deal.

[B]

I know him loosely, so I think that's a very.

[A]

Listen, he's always so sweet to me. I really like him. I love his content. But anyone who operates like that or I think that's. Is gonna get a. Like. Oh, I don't know, man. Like, I don't want. I don't want it to end well for Steve, but I worry that you

[B]

don't want it to end well for Steve.

[A]

I don't want it to end poorly for Steve, obviously. I want him to win and win and win and win.

[B]

Yeah. You're worried about him like a mother would be.

[A]

Yeah, like a mother. And for somebody that's been around a long time and seen the ebbs and flows of celebrity and someone who.

[B]

But I think he's so.

[A]

Goes so close to the sun.

[B]

But I think he. I think he. I think he's really good at operating the chaos. I agree with you. There is, like, there's something to be worried about there. But I think he's pretty tight with these, like, casinos.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That, like, he does lose big, but he also bets big. And I think that, like, will like, forever be a thing.

[A]

Right?

[D]

That mentality is exactly why he's in the position that he's in.

[B]

I don't know why I said that. Like, it was like.

[D]

Like, that's the surefire way.

[A]

Don't worry.

[B]

I know he's losing big, but guess what? He's also betting big. I don't know why I said that.

[A]

I'm not. I don't. I don't think that he'll necessarily, like, lose all his money, but I think that, you know, that kind of lifestyle will. I don't know, it'll catch up with you. Or he'll. He'll become disillusioned with it or something. I don't know. I just don't like it. Or he'll get robbed or. That's what I worry about.

[B]

I think he just lives a completely. He's on a completely different track than the rest of us. Okay. He's living super.

[A]

He's superhuman.

[B]

He's. Yeah, Okay. I think Togi and Steve will do it. Have the most one of one videos on YouTube I've ever seen in my life. Every time I click into those videos. I mean, now, do you not agree with this? It is. It's very. I've never seen anything like it. Like, it's very, very special.

[D]

I mean, they're very special. Is an interesting way to describe it.

[A]

I mean, it's for guys, not. I mean, I know what Dave's saying.

[B]

In a world, I like watching the beasts, but it's not David Dobrik's vloggers, everything. That is a very specific kind of video, and it is the one thing I'm always tuning into. I can't. I can't help it. I can't help it.

[A]

Videos are great.

[B]

It's so interesting. His giveaway winners for his videos, he gives away money. Yeah, he's got them on payment plans. There's like 10 every video. He goes away at $50,000, and he's got like 10 people that he's paying monthly because he can't pay them all off right now. Now he can't because he's been winning. He's won, like $3 million this whole world cup season.

[C]

Oh, no.

[B]

But.

[A]

Oh, I just want to come clean that yesterday, when you smelled that awful thing in Ilya's room, I had taken a shit.

[D]

Oh, my God.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

I was so embarrassed. And then you brought Tay in. Then once you brought Tay in, I'm like, I can't fucking say anything.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[D]

That's crazy. That's why you didn't want to do the pot up in that room to begin with.

[A]

No, I didn't care. I was fine with the sm.

[B]

Dave didn't love his pocket.

[D]

He was like, the smell is fine.

[B]

Yeah. So we moved the podcast equipment from the movie room also.

[A]

You moved it for no reason?

[B]

Well, I did. I was going to record it there till I smelled it, so. Because I was supposed to edit the vlog in here. So I was like, can we move the stuff? Because our editor's coming in, so I want him to work here. And we moved the stuff to Ilya's old room. Jason did. And then I walked in and I was like, is there a fucking leak here? Like, what's going on? Is there a gas. Something's going on. I genuinely thought it was dangerous. I was like, we should get it, like, tested. And then I was like, taylor, walk in here. Do you smell this?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And she goes, oh, my God. And then Jason walks in and he goes, this is crazy that you would say this knowing it's your own feces. You walked in there and you're like, it's not that bad. Let's just record in here.

[A]

Yeah, I knew it was bad.

[B]

That's fucking crazy.

[A]

I'm sorry.

[B]

That's crazy.

[A]

I'm sorry.

[B]

You blew up the spot. We're gonna do the pod.

[A]

I was setting up the pod and I'd run. Once I ran up those stairs, I was like, oh, gotta go.

[B]

Oh, my God, I gotta get Taylor.

[A]

No, no, don't tell Taylor. Don't tell Taylor. No, don't tell her. Hey, come here.

[B]

Grab a mic real quick.

[A]

Oh, my God, that's.

[B]

Please don't tell Taylor. She's got.

[A]

She's got enough on her plate.

[B]

She has the right to know. She has the right to know. Tay, can you grab the mic? Oh, sandwiches.

[A]

Got a sandwich.

[B]

I don't know if I'm in the mood for the sandwich. Tay, can you see. I know. Can you grab the. Can you grab the mic? This looks incredible. Tate, do you know what we just found out what the smell in the podcast room yesterday was. Jason.

[A]

Jason, I'm really sorry.

[B]

Took a shit.

[D]

Oh, and you didn't admit it?

[A]

No, because you were there and I was really embarrassed. I'm so sorry. If it was just David, I would have been like, I took a shit. I'm so sorry.

[D]

Oh, we thought something died.

[A]

You didn't, like, hire someone to come in and.

[D]

No, I just opened the window and then I was like, oh, I guess everything's Fine. I thought it was honestly the trash.

[B]

No, not only that, but I remember as I was walking out, I was leaving. I was like, taya, please go find out where that smell's coming from. So I sent poor Taylor to go sniff around the room to see where it was coming from. The worst part, you didn't. And just open the. I thought there was something in the closet. Like someone threw a banana peel in the closet?

[D]

Yeah, yeah, something threw. I thought there was, like, a mouse behind a wall, dead or something.

[A]

What I felt really bad about Tay was, like, how aggressive he gets in those moments. He's like, taylor, what the.

[D]

Like the hell.

[A]

The smell. What the heck's going on? Okay, you gotta. You gotta take care of that taste. And then I felt bad and I

[B]

was like, oh, no, take care of that.

[D]

It's funny for someone that has, like, not that much energy, you find it. You find it in moments like that.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Really?

[D]

Yeah. Like, you're so low key. Like, man, like, all day long you're on your phone, you're chilling, whatever. But then when there's something kind of

[A]

fun, it's like, his house. He loves this house.

[B]

There's something. Well, I also love that room. It's like a brand new room. Reggie just designed it.

[A]

No, sorry. It is beautiful.

[B]

Did you know what happened?

[A]

No.

[B]

Reggie designed the room.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

I put $3,000 into it for him to design it, which is a great a steal for what he did. He made it look like the addition. It's very beautiful. Four days later, takes a guy in there and fucks him. That's almost.

[A]

It's pretty awesome.

[B]

That should. That should bring me back to zero, right? That's like.

[A]

I mean, you had sex while watching your vlogs, right?

[B]

Him?

[D]

Well, weren't your.

[B]

What?

[A]

Well, that's Reggie's work.

[B]

I've had sex while. I've never had sex while watching.

[A]

You never put your vlogs on while you're having sex.

[D]

Wait, what? Why would you do that?

[B]

Crazy.

[A]

You never put the pot on while

[D]

you're having sex, do you?

[B]

What kind of weird are you doing?

[D]

Do you listen to your vlogs?

[B]

You're watching your daily vlogs while having sex.

[A]

Yeah, of course. I got it on the big screen.

[B]

Wait, why did you say that so casually?

[A]

I'm joking. That's like a common joke. I put my music on while I have sex.

[B]

Yeah, with musicians, I guess, but, like, that's crazy.

[A]

I thought you'd go, ha, ha ha.

[B]

I find that repulsive none of that's funny.

[A]

You never put your vlogs on while you're jacking off.

[B]

That's different. No, no, I've never actually. Never ever, ever, ever.

[A]

I wouldn't think you would.

[B]

I've never put my vlogs on. No, it's not. Like, if you're, like, hooking up with, like, Johnny Depp and you turn on Pirates of the Caribbean, that's fucking. Like, I'd blow Johnny Depp and watch Pirates of the Caribbean.

[A]

Okay, so I'm watching TikTok the other night, and I see a clip of Adin Ross, right? And he's talking about GTA 6. He's talking about how he's gonna have his own server in GTA 6.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And then he's like. And then he's like, I'm gonna make millionaires. People are gonna be able to buy real estate, sell coffee. And then he goes. He goes, you're gonna be a millionaire. But if I go up in the game and I kill you, I take it all away. Is that true? No.

[D]

Oh, yeah. I don't think so.

[B]

No.

[A]

So how does that. It's not true at all.

[D]

Well, no, he was saying that and, like, that's the way that he wants to have his own map or server or something that functions in that way.

[B]

How do you know this?

[D]

Because Jason sends us these reels for us to conversate on.

[B]

How do you know that this is what he means?

[D]

Well, because that's what he said in the TikTok.

[B]

See, that's crazy.

[A]

You could respond to some of the things I send. That would be really cool.

[B]

You know, I don't know what chat you're sending it in.

[A]

It's the David and Natalie chat.

[B]

It's the David chat with the three of us.

[A]

It's not even. Like there's a lot of people in there.

[B]

That's crazy.

[A]

I don't think you've responded in there ever, ever.

[B]

Wait, I actually. Yeah.

[A]

Why don't you respond?

[B]

I don't know. Maybe I'm just saving for the podcast. I don't like group chats on Instagram.

[A]

It's not on Instagram, brother. Oh, it's in the text. I know. You don't look at the one on Instagram. I don't even send stuff.

[B]

Oh, wait.

[A]

But I like. I think that. So go ahead, someone explains idea.

[D]

Yeah, it would be cool that he wants to make his own server within GTA so you can go play in, like, Aiden's world, essentially.

[A]

Does it look different than the other gta?

[D]

I don't think so. I think it's the same.

[C]

Holy.

[B]

That's crazy.

[D]

But I don't know if it's even possible. He's just saying that that's what he wants to do. But I don't think he knows if that's possible yet.

[A]

And so how does. So let's say I go on Aiden's server and. And I. I can buy a piece of land in there.

[B]

I don't think it's possible though.

[A]

I don't think coffee in there. Like I can sell digital coffee.

[D]

People are. People are saying that that would. That that's like their hope in theory, but nobody actually knows yet.

[A]

I mean, a better question is, all I hear is GTA 6 is gonna make millionaires. GTA 6 is gonna make millionaires.

[B]

No, that's for sure. What's that?

[A]

Is that just streaming it?

[B]

No, no, no. I think it's like in game. Like, like, like Roblox people, people that create like games and servers and maps on Roblox are millionaires.

[A]

Oh, so it's like your own.

[B]

You can create things inside GTA that will make you money. Or people also think that you can literally have jobs in gta, right? Like you'll have ASAP Rocky come perform asap. Rocky will make a hundred grand. The people running the concert will make money.

[D]

I thought it was gonna be like an actual, like marketplace where you could sell things within the game too.

[B]

No, that too. But I mean, I don't know. I don't know enough about it to like talk about it, but I'm really excited about it. I don't think you could kill somebody and take the money, cuz. Cuz there's not real repercussions for that. But you're stealing real money. Does that make sense?

[D]

Why would they allow for that?

[B]

Yeah, why would they allow? Like I would just, like I would go in there, find the richest guy, kill him, take the money, pull it out of my bank account and kill the game. So it just like doesn't make any sense.

[A]

But if the game is designed that way, where if you kill someone, you get all their coins or whatever.

[B]

Yeah, but if it's real money.

[A]

It's not real money, it's coins.

[D]

Oh, but he was insinuating like it was real money.

[B]

Real money.

[D]

Like real money.

[A]

The coins changed money.

[B]

Okay, so why are you even saying coins?

[D]

Listen, he doesn't know what he's.

[A]

I'm just trying to ask about something. I think some really cool topic.

[B]

It's real money, Jay.

[A]

No, I get it. I understand that it's real money, but, like, I don't know. I could see that happening.

[B]

How I come in the game. You're a fucking millionaire.

[A]

If you choose to be in that server, you're. You're in a high risk situation, and it's like, yeah, I could lose everything.

[B]

What's the. What's the. What are the benefits of being in that server?

[D]

Well, because you can get a million bucks, maybe.

[A]

Because you can get. I mean.

[D]

Yeah. Okay.

[B]

Okay. The only way I would see that working is if it was like. Okay, so I. When you originally said that, I imagine, like a. Like a place that feels like the real world. Right.

[A]

The TV show.

[B]

No, that. That feels like what Earth is like everyone's living in harmony and then there are some bad people that are, like, robbing. Right. But that's not it.

[A]

But isn't that the whole thing with GTA is you rob people?

[B]

No, because you could, like, live life like a normal person.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Have a business and, like, be like, a nice guy. But I think this version of it would be like, everyone's killing each other. That's cool, right? If everyone's on the same page.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Then that totally.

[A]

Yeah, that's what I think it is.

[B]

Oh, so that's just gambling. Oh, okay. Okay. I thought it was like, you have your millionaires, you have your. Like, you have.

[A]

You have your.

[B]

You have your baristas that are making $10 an hour.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then you come and you shoot the barista, and you've just taken $20,000 that he's made in the last four months.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, no, no. If it's like, you buy into the server.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It costs $100 to buy in.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And the more kills you get, the more money you get.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That's fucking sick.

[A]

I think that's what he means.

[B]

Okay, then I think that's, like, a brilliant idea.

[A]

Hey, did you know they have female Uber drivers?

[D]

Like, it's an option, right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You can request.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

So for how you said that. Huh?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You know they're letting women drive on Uber.

[A]

Well, my friend. My friend who has a daughter, too, is like, yeah, we always have her take of a female Uber. And I was like, I didn't know you could. You could request that.

[B]

That's incredible.

[A]

And he was like, yeah, because, you know, women are better in every single way. And I said, yeah, everything except driving.

[B]

That's really. Matt, do you have something to say, please?

[D]

No, I mean, I don't entirely disagree most of the time, so.

[B]

That's really funny. I actually have heard you talk shit about women.

[A]

You what?

[D]

When it comes to stereotypes about any. Anything in. In particular for driving, like, they're all. They're all accurate women. Other people.

[B]

Dude.

[A]

Dude.

[D]

Like, it's just, without fail, every time I almost get into an accident, it is with one of the minorities that are not great.

[A]

My sister's a great driver.

[B]

Well, and you're one of them. You're also one of the minorities.

[A]

I know.

[D]

I know about that now.

[A]

You're a good driver.

[D]

No, I am a good driver. I actually think I'm actually all women but me. No, no, but there are definitely scenarios where I'm like, oh, and I fuck. You know, cut someone off, whatever. And they probably see me drive by and they're like, God damn, that woman.

[A]

Dave calls an Uber later today, requests a woman driver. I just feel safer.

[B]

Listen, guys, I think it's time for me to go. Wait, you have something to say to me?

[D]

Have you noticed anything different about me, like the way that I am now as opposed to, like six months ago?

[B]

Oh, yes. Yes.

[D]

Really?

[B]

But that's not a bad thing that you've been eating more. I feel like it a lot.

[D]

Shut up. Thank you. My skin. I have been on a new acne routine.

[B]

Your hair is darker.

[D]

No, no. My hair is also darker. Fuck.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

You go home and cry every night. Yes, I do go home and cry every night, but that's not it.

[B]

Your nose is less crooked.

[D]

Is it?

[B]

No.

[D]

Fuck, no. No.

[A]

Being even more of a bitch.

[D]

No. I have given up weed.

[A]

Oh, good. Thank God. It's the worst.

[D]

Oh, I still love it. Like, I will, like, have some.

[B]

You've given up weed?

[D]

Yeah, Like, I used to, like, every night. Every night. I used to smoke to go to bed every single night. And that's probably for like, a couple months that I was doing that. And it's funny because obviously you guys never saw me. Like, I would just go to bed or whatever, but, like, I feel like so many people. Or maybe it was on my for you page or whatever, but you get all. I would get all these tick tocks about, like, how, like, you know, weed, like, is the. It demotivates you. Whatever. I didn't really feel like it was affecting my, like, day to day that much, but I'm curious.

[A]

Serious.

[D]

I haven't. I don't, like, haven't smoked weed in probably like a month or two.

[A]

Why'd you stop?

[D]

Honestly, we just got busy.

[B]

Oh, it's been one or two months.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, you're asking us to see if we've noticed the difference.

[D]

Yeah. In my energy or my productivity?

[B]

I don't know about the productivity. I feel like we're kind of stagnant. No. No. I don't know. Do you feel like you've changed?

[D]

No. And I'm just curious from an outside perspective, if you guys, like, noticed anything.

[A]

You seem

[B]

more.

[D]

Just throw me a compliment, you know?

[A]

I guess you seem. I guess you seem pretty alive lately.

[B]

I would. I could see that argument.

[D]

We don't have to, like. We don't have to, like, pull our teeth here.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean, I guess. Like, I think. I think. Yeah. And your eyes are nicer, like, if you think about it, if you are looking the right direction.

[A]

What about you? When's the last time you smoked weed?

[B]

I haven't smoked in, like, four months.

[C]

Where were you?

[B]

I hate smoking weed.

[D]

I love it.

[B]

I think it's just like.

[A]

Are you gonna go back?

[D]

Oh, yeah. I'll probably double.

[B]

I like smoking weed as a teenager. That's when you do it. Like, that's the best.

[A]

Great transition to high school. Here you go.

[D]

Oh, my God.

[B]

There's no better feeling.

[D]

Wait. There's no better feeling than being.

[B]

Hold on, Ali, shut the fuck up. There's no better feeling. Yeah. Than being in a parking lot waiting for your dealer to come.

[D]

No.

[B]

And cops in Vernon Hills, especially my hometown that I love dearly. Like, any sort of meetup at night, they're. They're fucking busting you. Flashlights in the car.

[A]

Everything, really.

[B]

So, like, it does feel like you're in fucking the middle of North Korea and you're. I don't know, changing a color tv. I don't know what is. What is bad there. Yeah. But it's the best feeling when you get that gram of weed and you Change it for 20 bucks and then you're rolling it up. You're. You're putting into the grinder, and you have the little key flaft. It really is incredible. It's putting it right on the. And then what's so good about smoking when you're younger is you can eat anything. So that's what changes the weed game completely.

[D]

Yeah, but that's also like the.

[B]

And you can't eat everything because you don't have money yet. So you have, like. You have $5 after the weed, and you. You ration and you buy Taco Bell, and that's a lot for you. $5. Because you're really splurging on Taco Bell. And you're eating like a king. And like, bless me, I've done well. I'm very lucky. Like now when I smoke weed, doordash is dangerous because anything can come to my mind.

[D]

It's the best part. It's the best part.

[A]

No, no, no, no.

[B]

Because I have the ability to order 10x what I was ordering as a kid. And it's dangerous. It's so incredibly dangerous.

[D]

It's so fun.

[B]

And I used, when I used to smoke weed, I used to order like a fruit platter, but I would fucking destroy the fruit platter where that. Well, that wasn't even healthy. Like, the whole bag of grapes would be gone, oranges would be gone. Clementines couldn't come anywhere near me. So, yeah, that's why I gave it up.

[A]

Why does it do that? Why don't they make weed that doesn't make you so hungry?

[D]

I don't know what it is.

[A]

Do they have weed like that?

[D]

I don't think so.

[A]

All weed just makes you ravenous.

[D]

No, no, I'm sure there are different.

[B]

One of the best nights here was all our hometown friends were over and we all got high.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, my God, what happened? There was a SpaceX rocket launch at the same time.

[A]

No way.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

And like, right over the pickleball court.

[B]

And like now, now we could see the SpaceX launches, like, all the time. For my house. But that was the first one I thought, I think we saw ever. And I was. We were on the pickleball court. We were all playing. We were all so high where we could like, barely, like, really high. Yeah. Because we don't get high a lot. So when we do, I'm always like, we got to fucking go all the way. I go down to this, even if we have weed, I'm like, I'm going out of the store. I spend a couple hundred dollars and I get the best, highest THC level weed possibly could find. And I'm like, everyone gets their own blood. And everyone's like, we don't need our own blood. So, like, everybody gets their own blood. It looks so much cooler. So I pass them out, we're all smoking, get really high, and then I look in the sky and I'm like, what the fuck? I don't know if it was me or somebody else saw it, but I know the first person was definitely like, had to question it for at least two seconds being like, yeah, that's a rocket. Probably one of the coolest things to see when you're high, big in the

[A]

sky, or pretty small.

[D]

It was Huge.

[B]

And it was huge.

[D]

It just, like the thing, everything was departing and breaking off, like, right over here.

[B]

It looked like Haley's Comet out of, like, a movie. Yeah. It looked like how they portray comets in movies.

[D]

And you could see it, like, breaking the barrier of sound or light or whatever the hell it's doing up there. But going fast. Oh, so fast, Jerry.

[B]

So fast.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Yeah. You won't believe it.

[A]

Really? Tell me more.

[B]

That was the best.

[A]

And then what happened?

[D]

It's really loud, too. We can hear it all, like, from here.

[B]

Yeah. And we heard, like, Mission Control. And then John. John pulled it up on his phone, which is double fun, because now you can hear Mission Control talking about it.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

So then you're getting the live updates. Breaking off. Breaking off. Red Niner, whatever they say. Santa. San Bernardino, we have a problem. Actually, I don't know where the problem.

[A]

What are you doing this weekend?

[B]

What the fuck? That's it.

[C]

You're not.

[B]

Don't want to hear more about my. My life as a child?

[D]

Guys, it's the 250th anniversary of America.

[B]

Is it really?

[D]

Yes, it is.

[B]

250.

[D]

250 is a big, special Fourth of July.

[A]

Wow.

[D]

We gotta do something good.

[B]

I really do love this place.

[A]

It's this house.

[B]

No, no, no. Well, obviously that. But like the United States, it really is great. Like, we have our problems. Big problems. You know what I mean?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I think that comes with being so great. I don't know if that makes sense.

[A]

Well, yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Maybe being so big.

[B]

But we are really, like. It is really, like, you know.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Got a lot of problems.

[B]

Yes. But, like, we're very, very, very. And I could do probably 10 more verys. Fortunate to be living here. This World cup has also really changed my honor.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, we have Ranch. Yeah, we have ranch and we have

[B]

Chili's, which is big. Up there goes Jason's phone. So loud. Jason, you know what's louder than your ringtone?

[C]

What?

[B]

Is when you slap your phone trying to turn it off. That's what's louder. That's what actually is more distracting. Yesterday we were watching the vlog, and I really like when everyone's quiet watching the vlog. Jason's phone started ringing. Fucking slaps his phone like, five times. I don't even think he knows how to turn off the ring. He just starts hitting it. And then when he's done hitting it, his laptop starts making noise. Same thing. It's like a little band of Apple products and Jason conducting it by Slapping all of it. There it is. It's so loud.

[D]

I'm just like, why is that the ringer?

[B]

It feels like I was just put in the game Tron. Like, it feels like I was just moved into a video game.

[C]

Hey.

[B]

Hi.

[D]

Am I Ubering today?

[A]

I don't know. I'm finishing the podcast now.

[B]

Charlie, we want to talk to you. We can't. Jason can't be paying for any more of the Ubers.

[D]

That's okay.

[A]

She's over you. I'll leave now and I'll come get you. Okay? I'll be there soon.

[B]

Charlie, who's your favorite on the podcast out of us three? Me, Natalie and Jay.

[A]

Jay, me. Who's your favorite? Natalie, David, or Jason? All right, I'll call you later.

[D]

I think she said Natalie.

[B]

I think she said it too, but I guess we'll never know because it kind of disgusted, really.

[A]

I'm gonna call her a female Uber.

[B]

You get mad at her, you only call her male Ubers from now on. You take that shit back, you're never getting a female Uber again.

[A]

I don't know how to turn my ring down.

[B]

That's fine. All right, guys, that's all the time we have. Jason's got to go pick up his kid. Yeah, his 29 year old kid.

[A]

Oh, my God. Really?

[B]

Kind of funny.

[A]

She needs a ride.

[B]

Wait, how old is she?

[A]

Seventeen.

[B]

She can't drive.

[A]

They don't have my licenses. My kids.

[B]

What's with LA kids, man? That should be the pinnacle of turning 16.

[D]

I mean, in LA. Yeah, for sure.

[B]

I mean, isn't that the best part? Getting your license?

[D]

Yeah, driving around.

[B]

I couldn't wait till I was 16.

[A]

I took her to get her permit the other day and she passed.

[B]

Oh, so she's good to go. All right, guys, we'll see you guys for the next podcast. Let us know in the. Let us know in the comments what you would like to see more of, hear more about. Honestly put topics in the comments. It's so easy for us. We see every single comment. Whatever you say. We'll yap. Bye.