Masturbating at Work

Summary

Podcast Summary: VIEWS with David Dobrik & Jason Nash

Episode: Masturbating at Work
Date: May 29, 2026

---

Episode Overview

In this lively and unfiltered episode of VIEWS, David Dobrik, Jason Nash, and Natalie dive into a whirlwind of candid banter and hilarious takes on everything from workplace dynamics and internet comments to extravagant European trips and surprising cultural customs. The episode’s title, "Masturbating at Work," references a viral news story that sparks a heated, absurd debate late in the episode. True to the podcast’s style, the conversation is equal parts chaotic, self-deprecating, and earnest, offering behind-the-scenes glimpses, debates about friendships and work, and even a touch of existential reflection.

---

1. Responding to Negative Comments and Pod Recap

Timestamps: 01:07 – 07:31

Key Points:

• The episode opens with David jokingly introducing "ugly Natalie and awesome Jason."
• Natalie recounts harsh comments from the previous episode, reading out especially scathing YouTube feedback accusing her of being "whiny" and ungrateful for her job as David’s manager.
• Jason and David both defend Natalie, discussing the disconnect between on-camera personas and real-life relationships.
• Jason offers insight into group dynamics:
  Jason: "It's such a web of personalities that only, like, someone like me or Taylor or John or Ilia could understand that. The audience would never understand. If she doesn't act like that, then you won’t do anything." (06:01)

Notable Quotes:

• David: "Natalie's the daughter of Lucifer, right? So she will have a little bit of..." (03:55)
• Natalie: “It's just crazy. We're going back to Monaco in five days.” (07:40)

---

2. Behind the Scenes: Travel, Wafer Business, and Europe

Timestamps: 07:39 – 15:51

Key Points:

• The group discusses their rapid-fire travel schedule—multiple trips to France and Monaco for the F1 Grand Prix and Cannes.
• David and Natalie describe a Circle K “wafer summit” with teams from across Europe, likening it to speed dating at the UN, and express awe at Europe’s tangible history and cultural differences.
• David is particularly struck by meeting real-life Europeans he previously associated only with movie accents and historical stereotypes.
• Reflections on the “trendsetting” image of the US in Europe.

Notable Quotes:

• David: “It felt like I was a politician...it’s like the UN of a grocery store.” (13:00)
• David: “There’s just so much history in those accents.” (12:55)

---

3. Birthdays, Aging & Existential Realizations

Timestamps: 16:01 – 20:18

Key Points:

• Jason laments about his recent 53rd birthday, feeling its emotional weight for the first time.
• The group jokes about rotating party dates to accommodate travel.
• Existential musings on the passage of time and the number of “summers” left in life.
• David shares that his experience with DMT altered his perspective on mortality.

Notable Quotes:

• Jason: “Thirty summers. Good movie.” (19:55)
• David: “I think I’m going to be here for a while.” (20:13)
• David: “The DMT thing really changed my perception on death.” (20:18)

---

4. School, Life Skills & The Founders School

Timestamps: 22:49 – 25:33

Key Points:

• Jason introduces the Founders School in NYC, which charges $150k/year but guarantees a million-dollar outcome—or your tuition back.
• Lamenting the lack of practical life skills in traditional high school curricula—like investing or editing video.
• Natalie shares David was, in fact, taught iMovie by a teacher.

Notable Quotes:

• David: “I think Math after grade four, highly overrated.” (24:14)
• Jason: “They actually teach kids...how to make money, or just like, more life skills. I mean, I feel like I didn’t learn anything in high school.” (23:58)

---

5. Norwegian Graduation Traditions & Outrageous Prices

Timestamps: 25:33 – 28:03

Key Points:

• David describes Norway’s graduation tradition: 30 students rent and decorate a bus, then party for over a month, often drinking six days a week and not washing their “graduation suits.”
• The group is floored by Norwegian prices: three burritos and chips cost $155.

Notable Quotes:

• David: “You have to wear [the graduation suit] without washing it for a month and a half.” (26:21)
• Natalie: “$155.” (27:36)

---

6. The Viral News: Masturbation Breaks at Work

Timestamps: 28:03 – 29:49

Key Points:

• Jason brings up a Spanish company offering 30-minute daily “masturbation breaks” for employees.
• The group debates the logistics, awkwardness, and possible consequences of such a policy.
• David jokes about only being productive if those breaks existed, but concludes it adds sexual tension and “shouldn’t be written into the work schedule.”

Notable Quotes:

• David: “I’d be so much more productive if we had masturbation breaks.” (28:09)
• David: “That entire workplace would be actually filled with way more sexual attention.” (28:55)
• Natalie: “Just go, like, secretly do it or something, right?” (29:29)

---

7. Vlog Updates & Content Creation Challenges

Timestamps: 29:53 – 30:35

Key Points:

• David gives a short update on vlogs: there’s footage ready, but editing delays (editor is in Taiwan). New second channel and main channel videos are promised.

---

8. Extreme Feats & Mental Health

Timestamps: 30:35 – 33:02

Key Points:

• The hosts discuss a woman crossing the Pacific in a rowboat (three months from California to Hawaii) and reflect on the type of person drawn to such feats.
• Jason links extreme endurance sports to deep personal trauma, referencing a Real Sports segment.

Notable Quotes:

• Jason: “They go…and, you know, meanwhile, Bradley, he keeps running because...he watched his father commit suicide.” (33:02)

---

9. Showbiz, Social Life & Comedy

Timestamps: 33:06 – 37:47

Key Points:

• Quick mentions of Ilya’s shift to the fitness business.
• Jason and David talk about recent comedy events (Theo Von, Trevor Wallace, Casey Frey), navigating the LA comedy scene, and being too tired for afterparties.
• Plans for a “Scary Movie” themed party, featuring performances from Lizzo and Sexyy Red, with discussions about explicit song “Pound Town.”

---

10. David’s Parents & Parties

Timestamps: 37:47 – 38:12

Key Points:

• David notes his parents are finally coming to their first event, having never attended previous big parties.

---

11. Spielberg’s Alien Movie Conspiracies

Timestamps: 39:45 – 44:19

Key Points:

• David is blown away by a Steven Spielberg trailer for “Disclosure Day,” theorizing Spielberg might actually have real aliens in his film based on his narration.
• Natalie and Jason shoot down his tinfoil hat theory, debating how movie marketing plays into current alien interest.

Notable Quotes:

• David: “If anybody’s going to show us the most damning evidence of aliens…even have alien actors in a movie, it’s Spielberg, right?” (41:39)
• Jason: “This might be the dumbest thing you’ve ever said—that Steven Spielberg’s been filming with aliens.” (43:43)
• Natalie: “I’m just like, show yourself already. We know you’re there. Let’s get this show on the road.” (44:15)

---

12. Beauty, Models & Natalie’s “Duff” Moment

Timestamps: 45:29 – 48:19

Key Points:

• Natalie openly wonders where she ‘fits in’ among the models at lavish Cannes boat parties and shares her “Duff” (Designated Ugly Fat Friend) insecurities.
• David reassures her, saying her personality is a strong asset and that he’s genuinely more attracted to approachable, “girl next door” types.

Notable Quotes:

• David: “I think you have a good mix of like attractiveness and personality...to where it keeps you in the room.” (46:28)
• Natalie: “Then I had like a moment where I’m like, oh, I’m the duff. I’m that girl on this boat right now.” (46:35)

---

13. Joe Vulpis Drama & Wrap Up

Timestamps: 48:24 – 50:45

Key Points:

• Jason vents about playful trolling from friend Joe Vulpis, while David and Natalie weigh in on group dynamics and joking misunderstandings.
• The group signs off, encouraging listeners to leave positive comments for Natalie in response to all the negativity.

Notable Quotes:

• David: “Guys, go be nicer to Natalie in the comments. Say one positive thing you like about Natalie.” (50:35)

---

Memorable Moments

• Natalie’s epic YouTube comment reading sets the episode off on a raw, relatable note.
• David marveling at European accents and linking them to history and cinematic tropes gives a real “American abroad” flavor.
• Debate on “masturbation breaks” at work delivers the kind of absurd, uniquely VIEWS content fans love.
• Spielberg-aliens rabbit hole (40:47–44:19): David’s wild speculation and Jason’s mockery.
• Beauty and belonging on the yacht (45:29–48:19): A rare, earnest chat about body image and friendship dynamics.

---

Important Timestamps

• 01:07 — Episode begins, Natalie claps back at negative comments
• 06:01 — Jason on group dynamics (“web of personalities”)
• 12:55 — David marvels at European history and accents
• 16:02 — Jason’s birthday: aging and existentialism
• 19:46 — “Thirty summers left” existential moment
• 22:49 — $150k/year Founders School discussion
• 25:33 — Norwegian graduation party tradition
• 28:03 — The “masturbation breaks at work” debate starts
• 40:47 — Spielberg’s alien movie conspiracy
• 45:29 — Natalie’s “Duff” revelation and body image talk
• 48:24 — Joe Vulpis trolling and wrap-up
• 50:35 — David asks listeners to leave positive comments for Natalie

---

Tone & Style

• Conversational, irreverent, and sincere with bursts of self-deprecating humor
• Occasional heartfelt or vulnerable moments (aging, insecurity, mortality)
• True to the spontaneous chemistry and banter VIEWS listeners expect

---

In summary:
A classic VIEWS ride—part gossip, part therapy, part comedy club. No topic is taboo, but underneath the jokes are real stakes: how friends support (and roast) each other, how fans misunderstand creators, and the weird, wild stuff that makes daily life in their world supremely VIEWS-worthy.

Transcript

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Ondeck is built to back small businesses like yours. Whether you're buying equipment, expanding your team, or bridging cash flow gaps, Ondeck's loans up to $400,000 help make it happen fast. Rated A by the Better Business Bureau and earning thousands of five star trust pilot reviews, Ondeck delivers funding you can count on. Apply in [e-mail] depending on certain loan attributes, your business loan may be issued by Ondeck or Celtic Bank. Ondeck does not lend in North Dakota. All loans, an amount subject to lender approval.

[Jason]

Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile with a message for everyone paying big wireless way too much. Please, for the love of everything good in this world, stop with Mint. You can get premium wireless for just $15 a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpaying. No judgments. But that's weird. Okay, one judgment anyway. Give it a [e-mail] Switch upfront payment

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month. Required intro rate first 3 months only, then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See full [e-mail] views.

[David Dobrik]

What's up, guys? Welcome back to Views. We are back with another pod with ugly Natalie and awesome Jason.

[Jason]

Oh, my God. That is just. What a way to start. I listened to the last podcast. Yeah, you guys were cooking.

[David Dobrik]

Thank you.

[Jason]

I thought it was great. Yeah, the comments hated it. But I thought it was. No, I only read one bad one.

[David Dobrik]

What would it say?

[Natalie]

Shut up.

[David Dobrik]

It's actually pretty good.

[Jason]

It's pretty.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, it was kind of lame. Me and Natalie talking.

[Jason]

I thought it was good.

[David Dobrik]

Really?

[Jason]

I actually thought it was good. I've heard ones that you've done, just the two of you, that weren't as good as that.

[David Dobrik]

Oh, really?

[Jason]

Yeah, I thought it was really good. I was like laughing.

[David Dobrik]

Who cares? What are they talking about?

[Jason]

Natalie was sharing a lot. Oh, yeah, I liked hearing about the Ferrari. I'm just gonna review the last podcast.

[Natalie]

Oh, my God. Wait, these comments are. Well, they're not about you. They're about me. That I'm a whiny bitch.

[David Dobrik]

Wait, what?

[Natalie]

Because it's.

[David Dobrik]

I actually didn't think you were whiny.

[Jason]

I don't think you're whiny at all.

[David Dobrik]

I thought I was being. I thought I was being shitty.

[Natalie]

Well, I was like. I was talking about how I. You need to appreciate me, remember? I was like. I was reprimanding you or whatever.

[Jason]

People do get on that. They're like, what is Natalie talking about? David's her boss. They do get on that.

[Natalie]

It's unread. This comment.

[David Dobrik]

Wait, wait, let me see. Let me. Can I read them? Can I read them?

[Natalie]

These motherfuckers.

[David Dobrik]

Hold on, hold on. This is really good. Okay. Natalie's delusional. She won't find a job like being David's manager where she has direct access to his bank account. If these were. If this were any other corporation, she'd be legally laundering money.

[Natalie]

I'm not actually wondering.

[Jason]

Your mom would be in jail.

[David Dobrik]

I went to bed being like, I should be more appreciative of Natalie. But now I'm like, natalie, he gives you a paycheck. He doesn't need to sit and praise you. You sound like a whining 3 year old. Wait, this is crazy.

[Natalie]

No, every single. And there's like a lot of people that are thumbsing and harding it.

[David Dobrik]

Oh my God, this is crazy. Natalie totally just steals money from David. She made her position and probably set the salary rate when she barely does anything. Just lives off David's fame. Yo, Natalie, shut the fuck up. You are still an elevated assistant. Just because your pride couldn't handle this fact, you changed it. David, don't give a fuck. Or else you'd be back in Vern Hills where you were corpor just like your parents, making 72,000 a year. Or you'll become a biology teacher making 50k a year, 700k a year. He can. He can literally find a thousand girls who can replace you 1000 times smarter. David just likes to surround himself with friends. That's why you're still here.

[Jason]

Oh my God.

[David Dobrik]

That's fucking crazy.

[Jason]

Really unloading.

[Natalie]

That's like really deep. Like that person has been waiting to say that comment.

[Jason]

They feel like they know you.

[David Dobrik]

That's just to be another account.

[Natalie]

Well, the problem is they know me from what David shows. Wait, and I only look like a whiny bitch on David's content.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. Wait, guys. Natalie does work hard. She does work. Does she whine? For sure. And obviously, guys, she. I never blame people for what's inherently in them. Natalie's the daughter of Lucifer, right? So she will have a little bit of.

[Jason]

Jen got spectrum, by the way.

[David Dobrik]

What do you mean?

[Jason]

She got Internet.

[David Dobrik]

Oh, she did?

[Jason]

Yeah. She finally got it, so I'd be careful.

[David Dobrik]

Oh, she can listen to this? Yeah, I don't want her to fucking.

[Natalie]

She's about to surprise show up here at any minute. She's in town.

[David Dobrik]

Oh, fuck. She's in town. She's in town.

[Jason]

She's coming tonight.

[Natalie]

She's coming tonight.

[Jason]

She Is she's in a spooky, spooky scary movie.

[Natalie]

I love your ass.

[David Dobrik]

The demons have landed in la. Perfect. For sure. I just imagine, like, kind of like Santa Claus with reindeer, except she's got just, like, these fucking demonic creatures pulling the sled around. Oh, we'll land in LA today.

[Natalie]

Very witchy.

[David Dobrik]

See what David's doing. Yeah.

[Jason]

Thank you for inviting me.

[David Dobrik]

Let's see. Yeah, I can't stand listening to a whole podcast of them arguing. We need Jason in here to make it enjoyable.

[Jason]

I don't think I bring that much. I think I'm being hyped.

[David Dobrik]

Ask Natalie. No, you do bring a lot, I guess, finally, according to this, you bring a ton. Yeah, well, okay.

[Jason]

Well, I thought it was good. I enjoyed listening. I was dying.

[Natalie]

I was having fun.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, I was having fun, too.

[Jason]

Yeah. And you know what I liked about it?

[David Dobrik]

I totally thought people were gonna fucking tear me a new one.

[Jason]

You know what I liked about it?

[David Dobrik]

I was like. Because.

[Natalie]

No, I didn't think that people. No, nobody. And I know it's going to sound real. Pick me. But, like, nobody ever takes my side.

[Jason]

Nobody.

[David Dobrik]

No, that's not true.

[Natalie]

No one ever takes my side when it comes. Like our internal friends that actually know you and are with us every day. They understand my stripes.

[David Dobrik]

Oh, that is the most manipulative way of talking about it.

[Natalie]

Wait, why?

[David Dobrik]

Everybody that really knows the situation knows how it is.

[Natalie]

They do.

[David Dobrik]

Okay. It's like fucking come on.

[Natalie]

But on the outside, you're just a silly, goofy, chill guy, you know?

[Jason]

I don't think people.

[David Dobrik]

No, I feel like it came across exactly, like, on par in the last podcast about, like, how I feel.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[Jason]

No, I don't even know what you're talking about.

[David Dobrik]

Oh, we just. I don't know.

[Natalie]

Like.

[Jason]

No, but I knew.

[David Dobrik]

How do you feel, Jason? Probably cut it. You think Natalie should be less whiny? Jay?

[Jason]

No, because that long pause is. It's like. It's such a. It's such a web of personalities that only, like, someone like me or Taylor or John or Ilia could understand that. The audience would never understand. It's like, if she doesn't act like that, then you won't do anything. It's literally. You guys are like an engine. And that's how it works. It's just how it works. Yeah. You know, so Natalie has to be whiny to get you off your ass, and then. So then she ends up looking like a bitch. But really, it wouldn't have happened if Natalie didn't fucking Crack the whip.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, right. I don't know, guys. Natalie's defense because she lied to you

[Jason]

in the last pod.

[David Dobrik]

Don't go so hard on her. I don't even know what happened.

[Jason]

I think she lied about you. Going somewhere? Maybe a different time.

[David Dobrik]

Let's not rehash the last pod. Let's just call it David win and Natalie's, you know, negative 10.

[Natalie]

Whatever.

[David Dobrik]

Whatever the score is.

[Jason]

All right? We're calling this a winner, you know,

[Natalie]

that are dealing with naggy, whiny little men.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. Where are all the girls that are in the same situation as her? Working for the coolest guy ever, making a million plus dollars a year and enjoying life in Los Angeles.

[Natalie]

Listen, I'm not.

[David Dobrik]

She didn't tell me, remember? She was.

[Jason]

I know she didn't tell you, but I thought maybe you went and found out.

[David Dobrik]

No, no.

[Jason]

You could find out.

[David Dobrik]

I don't want to know. Well, I don't know how much she makes on her, like, side gigs, too. Here at David Dobrik llc, we're very open with your side gigs. Oh, multi.

[Jason]

You can call Jim Shepard and find that out.

[Natalie]

Phone in a favor.

[Jason]

Lee Crystals is nearly it last month,

[David Dobrik]

guys, but we are.

[Natalie]

So. I'm very grateful. I just want to put that out there. Like, I do love my life. I love my job. I'm very grateful.

[Jason]

Are you guys getting along? How was the trip home? You guys got home quick?

[David Dobrik]

Didn't feel like it.

[Jason]

I mean, I thought you'd be home later.

[David Dobrik]

Guess what?

[Natalie]

What?

[David Dobrik]

You know, I'm going to sound bitchy about this. Yeah, this is incredible opportunity. Okay, but like, it's just crazy. We're going back to Monaco in five days.

[Jason]

I heard on the podcast this is where I get all my information about you.

[David Dobrik]

No, we didn't even know that yet.

[Jason]

Oh. Oh.

[Natalie]

Well, now it's confirmed.

[Jason]

But we did talk going to Monaco for What?

[David Dobrik]

Really? For F1?

[Jason]

Oh, hell yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And then we come back here for eight days and then we have to go back to France again.

[Jason]

You're fucking kidding me.

[David Dobrik]

Three times to France in. In two months? In a month? I guess if you.

[Jason]

Does that bother you?

[David Dobrik]

Yeah.

[Jason]

I mean, no. Being in France is great, but traveling three times back in travel.

[David Dobrik]

No, that's true.

[Jason]

That's rough. We had the roughest trip back from England in Croatia. We got stuck in England. It was rough.

[David Dobrik]

Oh, yeah. You guys got stuck for overnighter and that happens a lot in London. It's happened to me once. Yeah, but like, I assume if that's happened to you, it must happen all the time.

[Jason]

Yeah, it was rough. Adam W. Took me to dinner. It was so rough.

[David Dobrik]

That was nice. I heard Adam W. Was really nice to you guys.

[Jason]

Oh, my God. He's so kind.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. He, like, offered to pay for your room for something.

[Jason]

No. Oh, maybe the other guys, but our room was taken care of by the airline, so he wouldn't have needed to offer.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. No, I love Adam W. He's the best. But yeah. No, I'm not. No, it doesn't bother me. It's fun that we're going, but it is like. And the south of France, we're going at, like, the most hectic times.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

So it's not like we're going to, like.

[Natalie]

It's not like a vacation.

[Jason]

Are you going back to Cannes? They're going to Monaco.

[Natalie]

Monaco. And then we're going back to Cone.

[David Dobrik]

But it's not that there's such hectic places where, like, you can't even go to a restaurant without, like, a plan. You can't just, like, walk around the

[Jason]

city because of the season.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. Cause everyone's there.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

During, like, big.

[David Dobrik]

I can't even imagine Monaco. That place is so small. And then there's F1 cars driving through it. How the fuck do you get anywhere? I'm so. I'm so curious. This is, like.

[Jason]

That's fun.

[David Dobrik]

I have really been wanting to do the Monaco trip.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Like, Monaco Alpha has been big on my list because I just, like, can't imagine how that race works in that town. It just, like, is really. We've really overdone ourselves. Overdone traveling. And then in Norway, we got drunk two nights in a row. That was very unexpected. Let's face it, guys, nobody likes overpaying, especially for live event tickets. That's why today's sponsor and our always sponsor SeatGeek deserves a huge shout out. With over $35 million, SeatGeek is the number one rated ticketing app. There are more than 70,000 events listed on SeatGeek, including concerts, sports, festivals, and more of your favorite artists are going on tour. Plus, the US Is hosting the World cup this year. So grab your tickets now, guys, you understand this. You can get tickets to any kind of live event with SeatGeek. You just look for the green dots. Green dots means good, red means bad. Plus, every ticket is backed by their buyer guarantee. Concert season has officially started. To make it even better, you can use code VIEWS10 for 10% off your SeatGeek tickets. That's 10% off tickets with promo code VIEWS10. Make sure you click the link in my description to download the app and. And have the code automatically added to your account so you can use it later. Thank you. Seatgeek.

[Jason]

How is Norway?

[David Dobrik]

It was fun. So we had, like, a waivers meeting.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

We're. We're. We're at like a thousand plus locations now at Circle K in Europe.

[Jason]

Okay.

[David Dobrik]

And not yet, but by.

[Natalie]

By July.

[David Dobrik]

By July. And, like, one of the things that we're doing is we were meeting with all the countries.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

From all the countries in Europe. So, like, it was speed dating. We'd sit in a room like. Like Lily on office room, and it said waivers on the door. And it was. People would come in, Ireland would come in, then the Baltics would come in.

[Jason]

You're kind of like a wework or something, like their headquarters.

[David Dobrik]

And then Germany would come in, and then France would come in. Whatever.

[Jason]

Who'd you like the best?

[David Dobrik]

Would you vibe with Poland?

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

Ireland. All of our friends are from Ireland.

[David Dobrik]

No, but remember, Poland had that really captivating guy.

[Natalie]

Oh, yeah. He was, like, locked in on the Polish, like, head buyer guy.

[Jason]

Locked in on what, Dave?

[Natalie]

Yeah. No, David was locked in on the Polish guy.

[Jason]

What was he like?

[David Dobrik]

I don't know. Everyone was just so. Because it was so interesting. Because they'd all come in from their countries.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And they were. They all had the accents of the countries.

[Jason]

Okay.

[David Dobrik]

Which is, like, crazy to me. Of course I know. But it's just like. It's funny how there's no one that was like, yeah, I moved from Chicago. Now, you know, now I'm in Poland. But everybody was like, to a T, Polish, then Irish. And, like, everyone had their jokes about how much they drank, how much vodka they consume, how much the Irish really love drinking, going out. Like, everybody had their little stereotypes and it was like, it was just so interesting to me. And it's. I mean, like, especially talking to. It was like the. We went out to dinner with the Ireland team and it was like, crazy talking to them. And I was like, to them, I was like, this is like. I know this is gonna sound like I'm a 10 year old talking here, but, like, it's really interesting that you guys are real people. And, like, because I associate your accents from like a Game of Thrones or from like a Braveheart or like something from back in the day.

[Jason]

Oh, yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And it's just so crazy. You're sitting here and you are, like, direct descendants of, like, some moments that really did happen in history. And you're like, like, I Don't know. Like, when you talk to Americans, like, you don't. It doesn't make you think of history, but, like, so much of history is in Europe.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And then when you're talking to all these countries, you're like, oh, yeah, Poland during World War II. Like, you were invaded by that other place we're speaking to later. Like, it's just kind of crazy. There's just so much history in those accents. I don't know why I thought that was so. That was so. I feel like an idiot. Like, I need, Like, I need to go see the rest of the world. But there's something. There's also. It felt like. It felt like I was a politician. I know we were meeting about chips in the aisle of a. Yeah. Like the UN Of a grocery store. Like, it was. It's like the least political thing ever. But it literally felt like I was like at the un, like, meeting all these countries. And like, the Baltics came and they. They represent, like, Latvia and Estonia and Lithuania. And they were like, well, our countries are really small, so we're looking for smaller bags. And I was like, this is so cute. Yeah, it's so adorable. Like, countries are smaller. And then like. And then. And then like, Poland would be like, well, it's. You know, our. Our store setups aren't like, the U.S. yeah. And they thought, like, they were like, the U.S. is like, a lot of times the U.S. came up as like, oh, the U.S. has so many cool things. And there was like. And I never even. I never even looked at it that way. Like, these countries do view as like, the US as like one of the leaders of, like, trend setting. Trend setting places, whatever the business is. But I just thought it was so interesting. I don't know why.

[Jason]

Everything's bigger in the U.S. yeah. Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Oh, yeah.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Everything's bigger.

[Jason]

What's going on in your mind, like, when you're. Are you. Like, this is a weird question, but are you, like, trying to sell Germany on your. On your chips or what's your. What's going on in your head? Or are you just having fun? Are you just shooting the. Like, well, whatever. I really don't care if you make.

[David Dobrik]

No. Like, it's hard because it's like, well,

[Natalie]

there's other team members in the room that actually know, like, okay, so doing the heavy lift, like, our head. But.

[David Dobrik]

But I bring that. I brought that up. I was like, it's kind of crazy. You guys say the same thing over and over again.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Like, new country. And it's like, yeah, Adam, who we work with, is really good at being excited about the product, and it's. It's not really good at it. He, like, eats, sleeps, and breathes it. Like, he is truly.

[Jason]

That.

[David Dobrik]

That is his. He's so excited. It's like, if I. It's like, if I won the lottery.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And. And there was, like, a new group of my friends that came into the room, and I was like, guess what? I just want $1.4 billion. That's his level of excitement about the product. And every time someone comes into the room, he's like, and guess what? Soon we're launching the freaking hot flavor.

[Jason]

Oh, yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And he's so excited about it. I'm like. And I'm like, well, does he own

[Jason]

a piece of the company?

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.

[Jason]

Okay. I'd be excited too.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah.

[Jason]

But, like, I'd be really excited, but it's really impressive to sell to Pepsi

[David Dobrik]

that it's the same way. I don't understand how stand up comedians work. Like, stand up comedians do the same set over and over again. And I'm like, how can you do this every time and have the same level of energy?

[Jason]

Because Bert Kreischer's cashing a $125,000 check every night.

[David Dobrik]

But that's not. That's not it. That's like. That's not like, that wouldn't get me to like. I just can't do that. I can't, like, if I've said it once.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

I can't say it again.

[Jason]

Right, right, right, right.

[David Dobrik]

Well, that's the art form other than talking about high school stories here on the podcast.

[Jason]

Yeah, see, you're good at that.

[David Dobrik]

I guess you're right. Maybe it is. Maybe I just have to find my n. That's really funny. Yeah. No, but it was. It was really cool. What'd you do while we were gone?

[Jason]

Jay had a birthday party.

[Natalie]

Oh, yeah?

[Jason]

Oh, yeah. Had everybody there.

[David Dobrik]

It's a big one.

[Jason]

No one. No one showed. A lot of people didn't who came.

[Natalie]

No. Really?

[Jason]

No. A lot of people show, but then a lot of people, like who I wanted to come, didn't come. It was just weird.

[David Dobrik]

I thought it was weird you threw it on a day we weren't here.

[Jason]

It's my birthday. It's my day of my birthday. You guys are never here on my birthday. We're always traveling. One year, you're in Singapore.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, but, like, I, like, Like, Alita's getting married.

[Jason]

Right.

[David Dobrik]

So I moved my birthday five days earlier, just so she could make.

[Jason]

Okay, so then we would have had to have it today, tonight. And then there's a party tonight.

[David Dobrik]

That's when we're doing Taylor's birthdays tonight.

[Jason]

Yeah, yeah. So there's. There was really. And then you're going to Monaco, giving me a five day window.

[David Dobrik]

We could do it sometime in July.

[Jason]

Yeah. Okay, let's do it.

[David Dobrik]

I'm kidding.

[Jason]

But the funniest thing, I was bummed

[David Dobrik]

because I wanted to be there.

[Jason]

No, spoken like a true politician.

[David Dobrik]

No, no.

[Jason]

But you really picked up some skills over there in Europe.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. Latvia and Lithuania. Also wanted to be part of it. No, I really did want to be there.

[Jason]

You would have liked it. It was fun. It was the private room. It was great. But it was funny. I sat in the middle with Naveen because it was Naveen's party too. And then everybody walked in and. Did you guys do name cards when you do a throw party?

[Natalie]

We haven't, but I mean, we were

[Jason]

about to do name cards. We were walking out the door. She's like, should I do the name cards? And I was like, nah, let's make it more casual.

[David Dobrik]

Like just assign seats.

[Jason]

Yeah, assign seats. So it's like, you know, I have someone to talk to. Naveen has someone to talk to. Like Naveen really wanted to sit next to Caitlyn. Oh, good, because she's pregnant. Right. And talk to her. So then everybody just came in and just sat at the other end of the table. And so I had nobody.

[David Dobrik]

Everyone. Oh, that's funny.

[Jason]

Like, I was just down the end like, yo, it's my birthday.

[David Dobrik]

Obviously they did that on purpose.

[Jason]

Why? Because they don't want to talk to me.

[David Dobrik]

No, they were just like, someone else is coming that's gonna sit there.

[Jason]

Yeah, I know. But for like, you know, they were late. So for like 20 minutes. Who was on my side came in.

[David Dobrik]

Who?

[Jason]

It was like, you know, it was like your crew. It was like Alex, John, Julia, Joe, Caitlin.

[David Dobrik]

Okay. Logan, Taylor, that group makes sense.

[Jason]

But I would.

[David Dobrik]

Those guys aren't gonna come sit next to you.

[Jason]

But I would have preferred if everyone just sat around us so I could have been a part of the conversation. That's all. Why wouldn't they sit next to me?

[Natalie]

Did nobody fill it in later?

[David Dobrik]

Because like, Alex and John aren't gonna like, take that from somebody that wants to sit next to you.

[Natalie]

Like, maybe your best friend is coming.

[Jason]

Oh, see, I would have loved to sit next to Alex or John.

[David Dobrik]

No. If they said that. Right. Oh, okay. Yeah. What they would have definitely sat next to you.

[Jason]

I should have said.

[David Dobrik]

You just gotta be more clear about it.

[Jason]

Yeah, yeah.

[David Dobrik]

How old did you turn?

[Jason]

I don't want to say.

[David Dobrik]

I couldn't even guess your age right now.

[Jason]

Good. Let's just not even talk about it.

[David Dobrik]

I think 54.

[Jason]

Nope.

[David Dobrik]

Lower?

[Jason]

Close.

[David Dobrik]

55.

[Jason]

Close.

[David Dobrik]

Six?

[Jason]

Nope.

[David Dobrik]

Six. Seven.

[Jason]

Other way.

[David Dobrik]

Oh, two.

[Jason]

53. Oh, it really hurt. Every number but the number this year really hurt.

[David Dobrik]

Really?

[Jason]

That. That number. 53. 51 didn't hurt. 52 didn't hurt. This one.

[David Dobrik]

Wait, wait, you 53 or 52?

[Natalie]

He's 53.

[Jason]

53.

[David Dobrik]

The worst memory. I already forgot. Yeah, Ask me at the end of the podcast, see if I remember.

[Natalie]

Okay.

[David Dobrik]

Okay. Why did it hurt?

[Jason]

It was just. It's just sounds old, whereas. But it's. It's ridiculous. I mean, it's kind of like. It's kind of like your thing about, like, Irish people. It's just in your mind for some reason. 51 and 52 are like, whatever. 50 hurt, 53 hurt.

[David Dobrik]

My thing about Irish people. No, I have the same theory about numbers, about age.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[Jason]

Well, I'm saying, like, it's an irrational.

[David Dobrik]

21's young, 22's young.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, you do. 23 years old, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jason]

So anyways, that's how I felt. But it was fun. We had a good time. Been going out, doing shit. I don't know.

[David Dobrik]

Well, I want to be there for the next one.

[Jason]

Okay, I'll move it around. I'll move it around next year.

[David Dobrik]

Isn't that crazy that you have a finite amount of birthdays left?

[Jason]

Got 30 summers left, Dave.

[Natalie]

Whoa. That's really crazy.

[Jason]

At the most, you think the way I've lived.

[Natalie]

The way I've lived.

[David Dobrik]

That's really sad.

[Jason]

Thirty summers. Good movie.

[Natalie]

But you're like, so, you know, it's kind of crazy. Like, you're so, like, seemingly, like, active and healthy and.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Mobile.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

So to say you only have, like 30 years left.

[David Dobrik]

I can't imagine dying, but you only

[Jason]

have 60 summers left.

[David Dobrik]

I don't think so.

[Jason]

50 summers.

[David Dobrik]

I think I'm going to be here for a while.

[Jason]

You think you'll go into the, like, the 150s?

[David Dobrik]

Oh, I just, like. I don't know. The DMT thing really, like, changed my perception on death. I just don't. I don't know. I just don't. I'm in a hard time wrapping my head around it now.

[Jason]

Did you see that TikTok I sent you about dmt? Where the guy's like got kicked out. Yeah, that one. But also there was one where the guy's like basically saying like it's another realm that exists.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, that's what I've been saying the whole time.

[Jason]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like it's another dimension. Like it's real, there's a world. Yeah, yeah.

[David Dobrik]

It's a real place and you're actually accessing it.

[Natalie]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[David Dobrik]

No, I really want to do it again.

[Jason]

Really. I have no interest.

[David Dobrik]

Guys, the NBA playoffs are here and there's no better way to cash in on the action than price picks. Listen, guys, if you're ever going to listen to an ad read, it's this one. The price picks people, they love us, we love them, we have a really good relationship. Please support them. We got some good, good, good for you guys. We got code views that's gonna get you fifty dollars in lineups after you play your first five dollar lineup. It's a good deal. Guys. Pick live squares during the NBA playoffs and you could win a trip for two to the NBA finals. To enter, you just make a $5 lineup with at least one live NBA player and pick during any part of the 2026 NBA playoffs. Live Player picks are picks made after a game is already in progress. Guys, listen, I have been using price picks for two years now. I do consult with my professional sport watching roommates. Okay, so we.

[Jason]

Who's the best?

[David Dobrik]

We do. Alex.

[Jason]

Alex. Okay.

[David Dobrik]

And then I, we. And then I text my hometown friends too to get the. To get the best insight possible.

[Jason]

What's it, what's some insight they've given you?

[David Dobrik]

Well, they just know who's hot really. And if your player gets off to a hot start. And you also have the option to cash out those winnings before the game even finishes because they have early payouts. They have flex play, they have power play. You can download the price picks app today and use code views to get $50 in lineups after you play your first $5 lineup. Again, guys, that's code views to get $50 in lineups AFTER you play your first $5 lineup. PricePix, a preferred partner of the NBA

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

on deck, is built to back small businesses like yours. Whether you're buying equipment, expanding your team or bridging cash flow gaps, On Deck's loans up to $400,000 help make it happen fast. Rated A Plus by the Better Business Bureau and earning thousands of five star Trustpilot reviews, on Deck delivers funding you can count on. Apply in [e-mail]. depending on certain loan attributes, your business loan may be issued by Ondeck or Celtic Bank. Ondeck does not lend in North Dakota. All loans an amount subject to lender approval.

[Jason]

Did you see that there's a school opening in New York called the Founders School. It's a high school.

[Natalie]

I think I have seen this.

[Jason]

I sent it in the chat. $150,000 a year, David. For high school. You don't know how much we pay here. You and I pay for our high school to send our kids, right?

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. So cheaper than the school you send your kids to.

[Jason]

It's not. It's three times as much. But for high school.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. It's a joke. Oh, not a dick. Don't take it so hard.

[Jason]

So check this out. But they guarantee you that your student will make a million dollars by the end of the four years or you get the 600,000 back guarantee. You basically the kids like go to school for part of the day and the other part of the day they like invest money and like build a business. Build it's teaches like entrepreneurship and stuff.

[David Dobrik]

That's a no brainer, right? If you can afford it.

[Jason]

I mean it's. It's like literally what school should be. Not that, not that what you shouldn't have to pay $150,000 for school. But I'm saying like it's what like public high school should be where you just don't pay. They actually teach kids. That was when I went on all those college tours.

[David Dobrik]

The public should be free.

[Jason]

Public should be free for sure. But in public schools they should be teaching these kids how to make money or just like more life skills. I mean, I feel like I didn't learn anything in high school.

[David Dobrik]

I mean, I agree. I think that the whole curriculum of high school needs revamping.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

I think Math.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

After grade four. Highly overrated. Well, no, I think after depends what

[Jason]

you're gonna do for sure.

[David Dobrik]

But that's what I mean. Yeah, but like when you get into your log X A your fucking Pythagorean theorems and that's not. Has anything, doesn't have anything to do with what you're doing.

[Jason]

Right.

[David Dobrik]

That's fucking. You're really taking up energy there. Of a youthful mind that can be doing something totally different.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

I think that should be completely changed.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And yeah, if there were any classes about like what even investing is right. I'd rock that shit.

[Jason]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[David Dobrik]

But yeah, there's not, there's no. Nobody teaches you how to buy a house. No One teaches you how to edit on imovie? Not myself. No, I'm kidding. No, but, like. Yeah, yeah, I did.

[Natalie]

I did. Actually. Mr. Matouj taught you how to edit an imovie?

[David Dobrik]

Really?

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[Jason]

I didn't know that, Natalie.

[David Dobrik]

I have this teacher that. That didn't like me in high school.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And every time I get something, like a new car, like when I got the Valhalla.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

I, like, always send a picture of it. You do know in my group chat, and I. At him. He's not in the group chat. But I always just say at Mr. Every time I get, like, a new fancy thing, I do think that. I do think that that should change. Did you see this other thing? Oh, my God. Was it just on the tip? Oh, no, you didn't see this, because I just found this out.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

In Norway. Jay.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

This is the craziest thing ever. They do this thing when they graduate high school. I keep forgetting what the name is, but the students take a month and a half. Like, 30 students will come together.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And they'll rent a school bus.

[Jason]

Okay.

[David Dobrik]

And they'll paint the outside of the school bus, like, in, like, a cool way, like, with, like, designs and, like, fun figurines and stuff like that. And they'll party on that bus for a month and a half straight.

[Jason]

Wow.

[David Dobrik]

So. And I asked, like, actually how many days they're drinking out of the week.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

I was told they drink six days out of the week.

[Jason]

Wow.

[David Dobrik]

On this bus, they're getting hammered.

[Jason]

They live on the bus.

[David Dobrik]

It's a month and a half of celebration. They don't live on the bus. The bus will be, like, around town. Maybe they'll park it next to another bus.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And then, like, the groups of kids will all have fun, like, hanging out on the bus.

[Jason]

Whatever.

[David Dobrik]

And the crazy part is you. There's like, this thing. It's like your graduation suit. I don't know how they refer to it, but that's how I'm saying it in English. And you have to wear it without washing it for a month and a half. So for maybe this part doesn't blow your mind. You're like, okay. But you don't. Yeah. You know, you don't wash anything for a month and a half, and you have to keep putting it back on every day to go drinking.

[Jason]

Really?

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. It's crazy. I got invited. Some people invited me on this bus thing, which is kind of crazy to think about that.

[Jason]

Did you go?

[David Dobrik]

No. I was so beat. In Norway.

[Jason]

Was it cold in Norway.

[David Dobrik]

Actually, the weather was like the nicest in Norway out of all the other places.

[Jason]

Really?

[David Dobrik]

Places Fucking expensive, though.

[Jason]

Really? Like how.

[David Dobrik]

Like Beverly Hills expensive.

[Jason]

Like, how much is a bottle of water in the hotel?

[David Dobrik]

We ordered burritos in the hotel.

[Natalie]

Is like €7 for a bottle of water.

[David Dobrik]

Okay, we ordered. No, no, no, listen. We ordered burritos.

[Natalie]

Yeah, we ordered like, we just with their version of doordash or whatever. We ordered burritos. We got two burritos. Yeah, and like a side of guacamole.

[David Dobrik]

No, three burritos. Three burritos.

[Natalie]

Okay, three burritos, whatever. And a side of guacamole.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

And a bag of tortilla chips. Like, basically a blaze bag of chips

[David Dobrik]

that they sent us, like a $2.50 bag.

[Jason]

Okay.

[Natalie]

$155.

[David Dobrik]

No way.

[Natalie]

Yeah. And it wasn't even like the, like, delivery fee, wasn't. It was just like the. The price of the food.

[Jason]

It wasn't. It didn't like, all go to the driver, right?

[Natalie]

No, no, no.

[David Dobrik]

Natalie doesn't tip. Natalie. Natalie.

[Jason]

Yeah, because I noticed Ubers were expensive.

[David Dobrik]

Natalie leaves no tip in comments and says, no, no, fuck you, Natalie's heart. Yeah, No, I think that's pretty crazy.

[Jason]

Did you see the thing I sent you? The company has masturbation breaks.

[David Dobrik]

What?

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

What company? We should have that here. I'm telling you, I'd be so much more productive if we had masturbation breaks.

[Jason]

I don't know which chat it's in, but there's a company that's like, they're in Spain and they give you a half an hour every day to masturbate.

[David Dobrik]

Huh. That would. I don't know if that would, like, be a good thing though.

[Natalie]

No. Why do we need to know everyone's masturbating?

[Jason]

Just wait till you get home.

[Natalie]

Cuz, like, what is the company? Is it like, they porn related or something?

[David Dobrik]

Like you can't know when everyone's going to masturbate.

[Natalie]

Yeah, that's terrible.

[David Dobrik]

Like, that could cause some serious problems.

[Jason]

Like how? Play it out.

[David Dobrik]

Well, like, let's say you have a crush on someone at work.

[Jason]

Oh, yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And you know they're going to masturbate in about 30 minutes and you're kind of looking at them or even you're having a discussion with them.

[Jason]

Yeah. Heading off, huh? Getting on. Be on break soon.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, it's just like this. Like, I feel like that entire workplace would be actually filled with way more sexual attention.

[Jason]

Mmm.

[David Dobrik]

I don't even think you could.

[Natalie]

I don't know Everyone just be like hyper aware of it.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, yeah, I think.

[Natalie]

Do you really have to do that, like in the middle of the workday? Like it's that bad? Like you're that desperate.

[David Dobrik]

If you watch Wolf of Wall street, he dirt. Matthew McConaughey's character jerks off in the middle of the day.

[Jason]

Yes, he does.

[David Dobrik]

Which helps him with clarity, which is. Yes, I do think with guys it does help you with clarity, but I think that's like a thing that it shouldn't be written into the work schedule.

[Natalie]

Just go, like secretly do it or something, right?

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, yeah, just go do it. Don't tell anybody you're doing it. Don't have it be illegal or legal. Just go fucking get it.

[Jason]

Have you ever masturbated during the workday with like everybody here? With Natalie here?

[David Dobrik]

I only masturbate when Ellie's here.

[Natalie]

He definitely does.

[David Dobrik]

I never masturbate during the work day. It's really funny.

[Jason]

You got a vlog update for me?

[David Dobrik]

Oh, shit. When it's coming? Yeah, I have no idea. We're gonna post a second channel video. It sucks because we're just sitting on all this footage and I can't really touch it.

[Jason]

Right.

[David Dobrik]

So. And our editor is in Taiwan right now.

[Jason]

Okay.

[David Dobrik]

So.

[Jason]

So we're communicating and you're going back to Monaco.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, yeah. It's very.

[Natalie]

Yeah, it's really tough.

[David Dobrik]

It's really tough. They're coming. There's a second channel video coming.

[Jason]

Okay.

[David Dobrik]

Next couple days and a main channel coming.

[Jason]

Okay.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah.

[Jason]

When's Croatia coming?

[David Dobrik]

I think that's the next main channel.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

From. From what I'm seeing.

[Jason]

Okay.

[Natalie]

From what I'm seeing. It's literally up to you.

[David Dobrik]

I have to have to talk to this guy. I don't really know.

[Jason]

It's kind of in my inbox.

[David Dobrik]

Did you see that woman that's sailing across the Pacific?

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

She's going from. She just started seven days ago.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

She's going from California to Hawaii.

[Jason]

Okay.

[David Dobrik]

In a rowboat. Oh, not a sailboat, a rowboat. She's physically row.

[Jason]

She jacked.

[David Dobrik]

You could trim. I don't know. I've only seen her like, she's like. She's got like a coat on and stuff. So I don't know like what she looks like, but she's got to be jacked. She's rowing. It's going to take her three months. What a fucking. I mean, Natalie's from California. Hawaii. It's a six hour flight.

[Jason]

You gotta have.

[David Dobrik]

You're rowing, Natalie. Rowing with your Hands rowing.

[Natalie]

Yeah. But three months sounds kind of crazy.

[David Dobrik]

And, like, if you watch the tracker right now, she's like, super off track. Like, it's like they show you the straight shot. It is, but she, like, completely curved to the left. And everyone's like, well, you got to follow the currents. I'm like, this is. This sounds like a fucking nightmare. Her bag opened up of. Oh, yeah, her bag opened up of clean water.

[Jason]

Okay.

[David Dobrik]

And she makes water there because she uses solar energy. But right now she can't turn. She can't use solar energy to make the water.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Because it's powering all the other things currently. Like, it's mapped out for when she can use that.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

So she's already going into her emergency water reserve. She has, like, 20 small bottles of water on board, and it's for emergencies only, and she's already going into them. Week one, I would just fucking turn right around.

[Jason]

Who she is she putting this on TikTok. Are you watching?

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, it's on TikTok. She's doing it for a charity. She's done it before, but with four women, I think three women, the same route. Yeah.

[Jason]

Oh, wow.

[David Dobrik]

And now she's doing it. Yeah, she's doing it.

[Jason]

I think you have to have, like, I don't know, something wrong with you to do stuff like that.

[David Dobrik]

I don't know, it feels like. But I kind of get it.

[Jason]

I once watched this. I used to watch this show called Real Sports on hbo. It would profile, like, groovy sports people, like, off the beaten path. And they showed this ultra marathoner, and this guy. This guy would run 750 miles. He'd run a thousand miles. Like, it was insane what this guy would do. And I watched the whole piece, and at the end of the piece, and he goes. They go. They go. And, you know, meanwhile, Bradley, he keeps running because when he was a child, he watched his father commit suicide right in front of him. Like, it was like such a roundabout, like, oh, okay. That's why this guy.

[Natalie]

Some sort of trauma.

[Jason]

Yeah. That's why this guy's running a thousand miles.

[David Dobrik]

That's how I feel about Ilya going into the fitness business. As fucking heart flushed as he is. I'm like, what happened to him in the last four years?

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Where he's gone from getting hammered.

[Jason]

He's all business, huh?

[David Dobrik]

To being into.

[Jason]

He came up to me last night at the comedy show, and it was so excited. It was like such a great sighting. He came up to ask me something, and I was so excited. And then someone else came over to talk that, like, we kind of know. And Ilya just dipped. He was just like, oh, okay. That was my Ilya time. He asked me one question.

[David Dobrik]

What did he ask?

[Jason]

He asked me if I had said hello to this. This guy who has like a porn podcast.

[David Dobrik]

Okay.

[Jason]

And. And Naveen and I know him, he's a great guy. And his. And he asked me how I knew him. Oh. Because I guess Ilya watches the porn podcast or something.

[David Dobrik]

It's the most delicious.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Way of connecting.

[Jason]

He's like, you. You know Ryan. And I was like, yeah, he was on my podcast.

[David Dobrik]

That's really fun.

[Jason]

But then someone else came over and like, scared him off. Why did you come in last night?

[David Dobrik]

You heard I was there?

[Jason]

I heard you were there. I showed up. Like, maybe I missed you by, like five minutes.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. Our friend had like a comedy show with like.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Theo Vaughn.

[Jason]

Theo Vaughn was incredible.

[Natalie]

Casey Frey.

[Jason]

Casey Frey. Trevor Wallace.

[David Dobrik]

Yes. Trevor Wallace. Keep wanting to say Casey Musgraves. That's not who I'm trying to say. Chris Delia.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And the birthday party was like, also like a private show for comedians.

[Jason]

It was like. Yeah, I was like. It was a. There was. There was like regular people there too.

[David Dobrik]

I was so jet lagged.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And I got there and then I saw the line out the door.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And then I was like, I can't do it. So I just dropped off Zayn.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

I was like. And. And laughing takes so much energy.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

I was so fucking tired.

[Jason]

Yeah. Stand up.

[David Dobrik]

So I was really true. Did you go to the after party?

[Jason]

No.

[David Dobrik]

That's what would have been exciting is like to go to an after party with stand ups. I feel like that would kind of be fun.

[Jason]

Yeah. I just can't do it.

[David Dobrik]

Really? Yeah.

[Natalie]

I can't.

[Jason]

I gotta.

[David Dobrik]

We should film a vlog where we go drinking with Bert Kreischer.

[Jason]

Yeah. I mean, all you have to do is fly to wherever he's playing and he'll do it. He loves you.

[David Dobrik]

Where does he. Where does he do, like, where does he.

[Jason]

He's just constantly touring. He's actually. I heard he's taking the summer off, so he's probably. He's literally in the same town as you.

[David Dobrik]

Oh, really?

[Jason]

Yeah. If you want to go over there, I'm sure he'll do it.

[David Dobrik]

To invite him over. Tonight we're hosting a. Tonight we're hosting. Wait, we can talk about it now, I think, because it's happening.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

We're hosting the Scream screening today.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

We have Liza.

[Jason]

I heard there's no screening.

[Natalie]

It's not Scream, brother. It's scary.

[David Dobrik]

Stupid. It's Scary Movie. Why do I keep thinking Scream?

[Natalie]

Because Scream is in it.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. Okay. It's a parody of Scream. We're hosting the scary movie screening.

[Jason]

Is there. Are you playing the movie?

[Natalie]

No, we're not actually hosting a screening either.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, we're not hosting a screening. It's a party.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

For the movie.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Lizzo's coming to perform.

[Jason]

Great.

[David Dobrik]

With Sexyy Red.

[Jason]

Oh, gosh.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. I think we're gonna transform my room into a green room for Lizzo.

[Jason]

Great.

[David Dobrik]

Which is really funny.

[Jason]

That's fun.

[David Dobrik]

I'm really excited. Lizzo is, like, one of, like, one of, like, my OG artists. I would use yeah. When I would make vlogs.

[Jason]

Her music.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

I'm feeling good. Remember that one? I put my hair feeling good as hell. Like, I listen. I don't want to sound like a hipster, but I was using this shit. Like, itunes had this amazing feature when I was looking for music when I was, like, first. When I was first starting vlogging is. You could find, like, coming up or like, the hottest new tracks that was like, very, very new stuff that was just, like, snowballing, almost like a TikTok algorithm. And I found Lizzo there and a bunch of artists like Portugal, the man that, like, was like, the key to finding good music. And they don't have that feature anymore. It's really sad. But, yeah. So that's happening.

[Jason]

And then Naveen banned Sexy Red in our house. Really? A long time ago. Yeah. Pound Town.

[David Dobrik]

Wait, why?

[Jason]

When I used to do live, people would request Pound Town.

[Natalie]

And Pound Town, like her. Is that a.

[Jason]

Sexy Red has a song called Pound Town.

[Natalie]

Okay.

[Jason]

And it's a good song. And so people would request Pound Town. They're like, we got it. You gotta play Pound Town, man. But then if Naveen was home because it's such a dirty song, she'd be like, you can't play that in this.

[David Dobrik]

Do you think she's gonna let you come today?

[Jason]

No. She knows Sexy Red's gonna be here.

[David Dobrik]

How does she feel about that?

[Jason]

She said, okay, she's just no Pound Town. So then I would get on live. I go, no, guys. No Pound Town. He's no Pound Town.

[David Dobrik]

No Pound Town. My wife is home.

[Natalie]

Why would they request that?

[Jason]

Why would they just love. They just love the song. It's just a dirty song.

[David Dobrik]

My parents are coming today.

[Jason]

They are?

[David Dobrik]

Isn't that funny?

[Jason]

That's so fun.

[David Dobrik]

It's like the first event. Isn't that crazy? They've never been to Halloween or birthday or anything.

[Jason]

Why not?

[David Dobrik]

I don't know. And I told him. I was like. I was like, you guys should, like, come for the birthday or Halloween. And they're like, oh, so should we not come now? And then they said, they're not coming anymore. And I was like, well, that's not what I meant. But yeah, I'm just shocked they've never come to those.

[Jason]

Way to scare them off, dude.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, no, I know, but I just feel like they should, like, really come. Like, when we, like, really, really do it properly.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[Jason]

Yeah, but any party out there is great.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

There's a difference between liking a house and actually getting it. Redfin is built to close that gap. Redfin agents close twice as many deals as other agents. So when find a home you love, you're not a step behind. When it's time to make an offer that means less watching great homes disappear and more zeroing in on the one you'll actually end up calling home. Redfin helps turn saved listings into real addresses. Get [e-mail]. own the dream.

[Natalie]

Okay, I have to tell you, I

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

was just looking on ebay, where I

[David Dobrik]

go for all kinds of things I love.

[Natalie]

And there it was.

[David Dobrik]

That hologram trading card.

[Jason]

One of the rarest.

[David Dobrik]

The last one I needed for my set.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Shiny like the designer handbag of my dreams.

[Natalie]

One of a kind. Ebay had it.

[David Dobrik]

And now everyone's asking, ooh, where'd you

[Jason]

get your windshield wipers? Ebay has all the parts that fit my car. No more annoying, just beautiful.

[Natalie]

Millions of finds, each with a story.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

EBay, things people love.

[David Dobrik]

Can you grab one more thing? I'll come back up for you.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

At Ameca Insurance, we know you'll always

[Jason]

find ways to look out for the people you love.

[David Dobrik]

And with Amica Life Insurance, we'll help

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

build a plan to make sure you always can. We're here to help protect the life you've built.

[David Dobrik]

Really?

[Jason]

You can have another one.

[Natalie]

Amica.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Empathy is our best policy. Visit ameca.com and get a quote today.

[David Dobrik]

Oh, yo, did you guys see. Did you see the new Steven Spielberg trailer?

[Jason]

No. With Emily Blunt for.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah. For Disclosure day.

[Jason]

Yeah. No.

[David Dobrik]

Or wait, what is it? Is it disclosure day?

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

It looks incredible.

[Jason]

What's it about?

[David Dobrik]

It's about aliens.

[Jason]

Oh.

[David Dobrik]

And like, Steven Spielberg, I guess, has always been into aliens.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Did he make Close Encounter?

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Okay, so he's always had, like, a fascination with him.

[Jason]

Sure.

[David Dobrik]

And in the trailer. The final trailer. He's narrating. And at the end he goes, let me just play you the end because the end is really fucking weird. So I'm, like, really confused. What is it called? Disclosure. I've never seen a director talk in one of these trailers. I'm not listening to this. I used to say to myself, wouldn't it be wonderful if all of this turned out to be true? I'm now thinking, wouldn't it be wonderful for people to know they're coming. All of this is true.

[Jason]

I'm so confused.

[David Dobrik]

Like, what?

[Jason]

Well, I think. Are they. My first guess.

[David Dobrik]

What the fuck was that?

[Jason]

My first guess would be that they're playing off of how aliens are now seen to be real to drive people to the movie. Is that what they're doing?

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[Jason]

But why would Steven Spielberg do the voice? The voiceover? It makes no sense to me. Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

What you're about to watch is true. Oh. I'm thinking, does Steven Spielberg have real aliens in this movie? I'm not even kidding. Does he have. Because he also said the entire third act of the movie you'll never see in any trailer. Fucking interesting.

[Jason]

You'll never see any of his trailers.

[David Dobrik]

I haven't seen any gossip about this movie or anything.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

This is strictly coming from my mind. So if I'm way off. Yeah. And how I'm putting these together, so be it. I may be way off.

[Jason]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[David Dobrik]

But is he just implying that he is about to show us. Like, if anybody's going to show us the most damning evidence of aliens, even have alien actors in a movie, it's Spielberg, right?

[Jason]

No.

[David Dobrik]

Okay.

[Jason]

No, I don't think so. I think it would be.

[David Dobrik]

Well, why is he saying. Why is he saying that this is true?

[Natalie]

I feel like he's well connected enough to, like, actually have access to that information, though.

[David Dobrik]

And I feel like if aliens, like, were like, you think Steelers.

[Jason]

Steven Spielberg got a budget from Universal and then.

[David Dobrik]

Exactly. Universal.

[Jason]

That's funny. And then while he was filming, he ran into some aliens.

[David Dobrik]

No, I just feel like aliens came down and they see everything.

[Jason]

Sure. They took a meeting on the lot.

[David Dobrik]

No, they didn't go, fuck. They didn't pitch it.

[Natalie]

He knew about it, and then he built the film around it.

[David Dobrik]

Wrong.

[Jason]

Wrong. You guys want waters wrong. Very good.

[David Dobrik]

We have meeting with Hulu next. No, I think if aliens came down, this isn't that crazy to think about. Right. Who are they gonna talk to? Obama has once said that he'd be a good. He'd Be a good intermediate between the aliens and humans. I agree, very cool. But 40% of the world would disagree. 50% of the world would disagree. Too political. It's not gonna work. Can't go to any of the politicians. It's too political. Who could tell a story the best? Steven Spielberg.

[Jason]

Oh, wow.

[David Dobrik]

I mean, I'm telling you, if you're an alien, you're gonna pick the greatest director of all time. No, I'm gonna bring this up to

[Jason]

you in like three months.

[David Dobrik]

When a movie has nothing to do with it.

[Jason]

What?

[David Dobrik]

When the movie has nothing to do with a real alien.

[Jason]

I'm bring this up there and be like, well, whatever.

[David Dobrik]

I didn't say that shit. I don't know. I'm just saying there's something going on here. And this was one of the most wild trailers I've ever seen in my life.

[Jason]

Wow.

[David Dobrik]

And there's a, there's a transition at the end of this. There's a transition as he's saying that it's, it's a shot of a deer face and it goes by the deer and on the other side of a deer face is an alien that he made in cgi. Yes. But I don't know if he's insinuating

[Jason]

this might be the dumbest thing you've ever said that Steven Spielberg's been filming with aliens.

[David Dobrik]

I don't know.

[Jason]

Dude, jump in here.

[Natalie]

David's been on a kick about this all day.

[David Dobrik]

Natalie's such a fucking bitch about this type of shit. She's like, so what? Aliens are real. Whatever. Can you answer my questions about waivers? So fucking lame. I, I, I, I know, I know they're out there.

[Jason]

What would happen if she.

[David Dobrik]

I'm so sorry. There's so ungodly boring ass people here, aliens that you have to deal with that aren't even excited for your fucking coming.

[Natalie]

No, I'm just like, show yourself already. We know you're there. Like, let's get this show on the road.

[David Dobrik]

We don't know if they're and we don't know what they are.

[Jason]

Natalie, do you ever like placate David and like go like down the road, the rabbit hole with him? Like, yeah, let's look, let's check out aliens for 10 minutes.

[Natalie]

Oh yeah, yeah.

[Jason]

Because that's what you do with your five year old.

[Natalie]

Yeah. And then he says, he's like, I hate how you treat me like a little kid.

[David Dobrik]

I just don't. Cause she's just like so not open minded. It's so weird.

[Jason]

Yeah, but you're really into that shit.

[David Dobrik]

Because I think it's just probably one of the most interesting things ever.

[Natalie]

No, I'm excited. I just don't think that today I need to spend three hours debating on whether or not it's real. You know, it's frustrating to.

[Jason]

It's just like, we don't know. Yeah, I mean, we know, but we don't know.

[Natalie]

Like, we will waste hours and hours and hours today, tomorrow, and the next day talking about this. And like, it doesn't really matter.

[David Dobrik]

Passions are built and started and continued.

[Natalie]

Well, yeah, I guess that's your passion. That's not my passion, so.

[Jason]

But like, what is your passion?

[David Dobrik]

Just being cold hearted.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Working.

[David Dobrik]

Just sucking the energy out of a room.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Turning everything into black and white. Whining on the podcast, being a. What else? Guys, I'm kind of tired.

[Jason]

That's okay.

[Natalie]

If you had to. Like, it's funny because like, we just went on this like amazing trip in Cannes and like all, all the women are incredibly beautiful. Right. These are like 15 out of tens that are on these trips.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

And I always think it's interesting myself joining because I'm just curious, like, what is your perspective, like, having me there, you know? See what I'm saying?

[David Dobrik]

Like, what do you mean?

[Jason]

Poor David has to walk around with his thigh.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Like, literally you're like, how hot do I think you are compared to the women? Do I think you fit in or stick out like a sore thumb?

[Natalie]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Cause like, to me I'm like, it's funny. Cause like, I don't think that I'm.

[David Dobrik]

Well, you're like the personality. Higher.

[Natalie]

Fuck.

[David Dobrik]

You know? Cause like a lot of models also don't have the greatest personality. That's like a very known thing.

[Natalie]

And it's true for sure. Yeah, I guess I could see that. That sucks.

[David Dobrik]

I think you have a good mix of like attractiveness and personality. 100% to where it keeps you in the room.

[Natalie]

I just think it's funny. Cause sometimes they'll be like, we'll be going around like at these things, like we were all in the yacht and they're all in like these tiny, tiny bikinis and I'm like, fuck, no, I'm not getting my bikini right now. And I just. And then I had like a moment where I'm like, oh, I'm the duff. Like I'm that girl on this boat right now. That's like the like ugly friend, you know, in the friend group.

[Jason]

Got a bag of sour cream and onion chips.

[David Dobrik]

Cause I yeah, Literally, I don't, like, look at the model girls and think, like, oh, these girls are so fucking hot.

[Natalie]

Really?

[David Dobrik]

No.

[Jason]

What do you think when you see hot models on the boat? Well, tell me about this boat.

[David Dobrik]

We said like a boat in Cannes.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

And yeah, it was like, super hot girls.

[Jason]

Overnight.

[Natalie]

No, no, just for the day. Like a little pool day. Boat day.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah.

[Jason]

Beautiful.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

But like, even when I say super hot girls, it's like they're super hot because, like, that is. What is. What is the definition of. They're Barbies.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Right. Like, it's like, it's not necessarily my type.

[Jason]

Mmm.

[David Dobrik]

Like, if I came on the boat. If I came on the boat, like, I would go for Natalie.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Over any of the girls. Like, if I didn't know anybody.

[Natalie]

That's interesting.

[David Dobrik]

That's an exaggeration. But I think. Do you know what I mean?

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

Like, that's not. That's not. That's never been my type. But I know that they're the hottest.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

Yeah, but you wouldn't look, you wouldn't. Like, my personality is not just like, radiating from, like, you just know me. And you, you like me as a person, so.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, but I think you're more girl next door than those hot girls. Like, you're more like, unassuming, like, easy to talk to. Not even saying that. You're like, you're fucking doing a stand up comedy set in the corner where I'm like, I gotta go listen to this girl speak.

[Natalie]

She's so interest.

[David Dobrik]

She's so captivating. I don't know. No, I feel like.

[Natalie]

Yeah, okay. Amazing. I'm glad we got that little segment in. I think it's time to wrap up the podcast now.

[Jason]

Hey, you know who pissed me off, Natalie? Joe Vulpez pissed me off. Oh, fuck.

[David Dobrik]

Joe Vulpez. That's the guy from the Teeny Weeny

[Jason]

Pod for the Teeny Weeny Pod.

[David Dobrik]

What did that little scumbag guy do?

[Jason]

He does this thing where he, like, fucks with me, but now Naveen is with me all the time. And so then Naveen just takes Joe's side. But she doesn't understand me and Joe's relationship. She doesn't understand that Joe's. How does Joe's fucking with me?

[David Dobrik]

Like, what, what did he say?

[Jason]

Okay, like, we were gonna go to the thing last night and he calls me. I'm like, walking out the door, he's like, he's like, you're gonna go. I'm like, yeah, we're going. Like, let's Go. And he's like, I'm tired. I don't want to go. And I'm like, okay, well, don't go. I don't know. And then Naveen gets on. She's like, joe, you gotta go. It's good. Good guest for your podcast. Pa, pa, pa. And Joe's like, yeah, I don't know. And then I use the word stoked. I don't know what I said. I said something. Yeah, I'm pretty stoked about it. You guys know what that means? Yeah, Right? He goes, what does stoked mean? Like that? And. And I'm like.

[Natalie]

I'm like, shut the.

[David Dobrik]

Shut the up.

[Jason]

You know what stoked means?

[David Dobrik]

Yeah.

[Jason]

I got so mad. And then Naveen's like, jason. Jason. Like, I know he's with me. He knows what stoked means.

[David Dobrik]

Like, he's with me. So it sounds like you got angry.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[Jason]

Yeah, I did. I got angry.

[David Dobrik]

So why are you blaming it on Naveen?

[Jason]

It literally sounds like, I'm not blaming on Naveen. I'm blaming on Joe. I told you, I'm mad at him.

[David Dobrik]

Well, I fucking. I have my problems with Joe, too.

[Jason]

Then he goes, can you drive me home? I'm like, yeah, sure, I'll drive you home. He's like, yeah. Cause, you know, last time you left me there and you didn't tell me that you were going home. And I was like, no, I didn't. I was like, I didn't do that. I wouldn't do that. And he's like, yes, you did. And I'm like, tell me where we were, what event we were at, and I'll fuck with you.

[David Dobrik]

And he was just fucking with you, and I'll apologize.

[Jason]

And he couldn't come up with it.

[David Dobrik]

Yeah, you also, like. You're, like, really weird. You can't, like, tell when someone's joking.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[David Dobrik]

If you don't hang out with him every day, you don't know whether or not a person's saying a joke about you.

[Jason]

Yeah, whatever. Fine. Take Joe's side. I don't care.

[David Dobrik]

I hate Joe. I'm on his side. I stand by Joe.

[Natalie]

Then I'll power to Joe.

[Jason]

No, whatever. And then the whole time, Naveen's like, why be nice to Joe? Joe's the best. And I'm like, no, he's not. You don't know.

[David Dobrik]

All right, guys, that's all the time we have for today's pod. Thank you guys for listening. Fuck Joe. Guys, go be nicer to Natalie in the comments. Say one positive thing that you like about Natalie?

[Jason]

Yeah, that's good.

[David Dobrik]

Don't make it backhanded.

[Natalie]

Oh, my God. I'm really excited.

[David Dobrik]

We'll read them the next episode.

[Jason]

Oh, my God.

[Natalie]

I'll be so happy.

[David Dobrik]

Okay. All right, we'll see you guys later. Bye.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

There's a difference between liking a house and actually getting it. Redfin is built to close that gap. Redfin agents close twice as many deals as other agents. So when you find a home you love, you're not a step behind when it's time to make an offer. That means less watching great homes disappear and more zeroing in on the one you'll actually end up calling home. Redfin helps turn saved listings into real addresses. Get [e-mail] own the dream.

[David Dobrik]

So good, so good, so good.

[Jason]

Everything you want for summer is at Nordstrom Rack stores now and up to 60% off. Stock up and save on the brands you love. Love like Vince, Sam, Edelman, Frame and free people. Join the Norty Club to unlock exclusive discounts. Shop new arrivals first and more. Plus, buy online and pick up at your favorite Rack store for free. Great brands, great prices. That's why you rack.