Picking My Friend Up From Jail

Summary

Podcast Summary: VIEWS with David Dobrik & Jason Nash

Episode: Picking My Friend Up From Jail
Date: December 26, 2025

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Episode Overview

This episode is both a holiday special and a classic roundtable, blending behind-the-scenes anecdotes from the friend group with a focus on nostalgia, holiday traditions, and an extended story about picking up a friend from jail. David, Jason, Natalie, Taylor, and Alex share candid, humorous, and sometimes sentimental moments, touching on friendship dynamics, high school escapades, and what the holidays mean to them.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Christmas Banter and Gift-Giving Expectations

• Participants: David, Natalie, Jason
• The episode kicks off with lighthearted arguments about gift-giving in the friend group.
  • Natalie expects a present, but David jokes that a pricey dinner counts (01:27).
  • Jason and Natalie riff on what it would be like for David to “gift himself” to Natalie, naked under the Christmas tree (02:10).
  • The group jokes about parental reactions to David’s antics.
• Quote:

  “If I surprise you Christmas morning, I was under the tree with just a little bow over my penis, what would your reaction be?” – David (02:10)
  “I'd be so grateful.” – Natalie (02:22)

2. Control Over Group Activities

• Participants: Natalie, David, Jason
• Playful but real discussion about David always choosing the activity or food (04:27).
• Natalie and Jason tease David for making everything operate on his terms, leading to commentary on group dynamics and boundaries.
• Quote:

  "Does everything need to be on your terms?" – Jason (04:59)
  “It is on my terms. I get that." – David (05:39)

3. Holiday Stress, Friendship, and Work-Life Boundaries

• Natalie shares needing space on Christmas, since hanging out with David always ends up feeling like work (06:00).
• Jason and David compare which friend has the “best setup” in life right now, considering money, fun, and responsibility (06:16–07:08).

4. Make-up Mishaps and Internet Fame

• Participants: Jason, David
• Stories about elaborate YouTube bits, like Jason in Squidward makeup for hours having never even watched Spongebob (07:28–08:33).
• Commentary on being a public figure and reading hurtful online comments, especially for Natalie (10:56).

5. Roasting Culture & Dealing with Insults Online

• Jason shares one of his best comebacks on TikTok Live (11:24).
• A broader conversation about roasting, joking, and the anxieties of going "too far" (12:03).
• Quote:

  “Lots of times I don't [have a comeback]. A lot of times I just take it. I go, oh, no.” – Jason (11:57)

6. Drug Stories, High School Nostalgia, and “Picking My Friend Up from Jail”

• Participants: David, Alex, Taylor
• Main story:
  • Alex recounts being arrested at 20 for weed possession. David picks him up from jail at 2–3 a.m., a story David forgot entirely (34:06–38:49).
  • Description of high school weed culture: hotboxing cars, fast food runs, paranoia, and close calls with the law (36:44–40:14).
  • Taylor adds stories about dealing with school drug tests and the inventive ways students hid clean urine (40:14–41:38).
  • The crew laughs over harmless delinquency, like dumpster-diving for donuts and pranking mailboxes (48:40–50:08).
• Quote:

  “I called you because I know you're probably up playing COD or something… and you came and picked me up [from the police station].” – Alex (38:34)
  “That was the best part of being high as a kid — driving to Taco Bell.” – David (50:32)

7. Making and Keeping Friends in Adulthood

• Taylor shares about the struggles of making friends in a new city and the loneliness she felt moving to LA, contrasted with her current best-friendship with McLain (31:28–32:51).
• The group discusses male vs female friendship dynamics and staying in touch over the years (29:37–31:16).
• Advice from Taylor:

  “Just keep putting yourself out there, and it'll come to you.” (32:24)

8. Brief Touch on Pop Culture & Current Events

• Jason brings up a story about a girl partying with Diddy the night before his arrest (15:37–18:01).
• David references recent viral events, social media, and word games (Wordle, TikTok) as part of group banter.

9. Reflections & Closing Holiday Thoughts

• The pod wraps full circle with each person sharing Christmas gifts received and voicing gratitude for friends and pets (50:55–51:35).
• David teases the next episode and says goodbye in festive spirit.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I'd be so grateful.” – Natalie, when asked if she’d want David naked under her tree (02:22)
• "Does everything need to be on your terms?" – Jason, about David’s dominance in group plans (04:59)
• “You're just trying to get to Taco Bell. That’s the whole mission.” – David, summarizing the spirit of their high school escapades (39:40)
• “I called you because I know you're probably up playing COD or something… and you came and picked me up [from jail].” – Alex (38:34)
• “I think my storage is full because of high school. I genuinely think I have to, like, upgrade to 2 terabytes.” – David, about his selective memory (35:31)
• “Just keep putting yourself out there, and it'll come to you.” – Taylor, on making friends in a new city (32:24)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Timestamp | Topic/Segment Description | |-----------|----------------------------------------------------------| | 01:27 | Gift-giving debate and “naked under the tree” bit | | 04:27 | Group dynamics: who chooses activities and food | | 06:00 | Natalie on boundaries and needing space | | 07:28 | YouTube makeup stories; Jason as Squidward | | 11:24 | Jason’s TikTok Live comeback story | | 34:06 | Alex’s weed arrest; David picking him up from jail | | 36:44 | Details on the arrest and high school weed culture | | 38:34 | Pickup from jail and related memories | | 40:14 | Taylor’s story of dodging school drug tests | | 48:40 | Dumpster-diving and prank stories (mailboxes, donuts) | | 50:55 | Gifts received for Christmas, sentimental wrap-up |

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Tone and Style

• Language: Candid, irreverent, playful, affectionate, with plenty of teasing and sarcasm.
• Atmosphere: Warm and intimate, with a heavy dose of nostalgia and inside jokes; occasional deeper moments about friendship, belonging, and growth.
• Energy: Reflective and goofy, often drifting between laughs and genuine sentiment.

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For Listeners Who Missed the Episode

This episode is classic VIEWS: chaotic holiday content, hilarious personal stories (including a surprisingly sincere account of David picking up Alex from jail in their wild high school days), and honest reflections on how friendships change but stay vital. Whether you want to laugh at dumb high school pranks, hear about the struggles of making friends as an adult, or just relax into some goofy group banter, this episode has plenty of memorable moments to revisit and share.

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Next Episode Teaser

David will return with Jason for a New Year’s pod, possibly from Sydney, promising more group antics and recaps of the holiday season.

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Transcript

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[A]

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[C]

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[B]

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[B]

But again, it's not a competition. Competition.

[C]

Wayfair.

[B]

Every style, every home.

[A]

What's up, guys? Welcome back to View is the Christmas special. Special guest Natalie and Jason is actually still here for the Christmas episode.

[D]

Merry Christmas, everybody. We hope you're having a wonderful time and I hope you got all your gifts and all your stuff together.

[A]

Jason wanted to record this episode because. Well, first Natalie wanted to tell me what she wants for Christmas. Do you? Do you. Are you expecting something from me? Of course. Really?

[B]

You're not going to get me something for Christmas?

[A]

No. What? I paid for that dinner for your birthday.

[B]

We're family, bro.

[A]

That was December 1st. That counts.

[D]

6700 for.

[A]

Thank you for remembering how much.

[D]

A lot of money for a dinner.

[A]

It's disgusting.

[D]

Wouldn't you rather had a gift?

[A]

Was it actually 6700? Are you making a 6, 7 joke?

[D]

No, no, it really was. I remember.

[B]

No, I think that there.

[D]

I think there's like five.

[B]

They reimbursed you, so it's just the flat, like minimum.

[A]

Okay, so what do you want for Christmas?

[B]

Not that we need to argue about it. What do I want? My boyfriend. I told you that.

[A]

You want me, don't you?

[B]

Yeah, that's what I want.

[A]

If I.

[D]

If.

[A]

Let's you wrapped up in a. I'm celebrating. I'm celebrating Christmas in Carlsbad. You're celebrating in Illinois. If I surprise you Christmas morning, I was under the tree with just a little bow over my penis.

[B]

I love that.

[A]

What would your reaction be?

[B]

I'd be so grateful.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Would you want me Rock hard or soft?

[B]

I think soft because obviously the whole thing is a joke in general. So I wouldn't want you to be hard. Cause that'd be creepy.

[D]

Are you under the tree and your legs are just coming out so we can just see your legs and your penis?

[A]

No, the tree looks like my penis.

[D]

Yeah. Yeah. So it's just legs, really.

[A]

And then I'm laying down like I'm posing for a magazine and there's just like a little bow over my penis.

[D]

No shirt on, nothing.

[A]

No. What family members would see me? Want to make sure if I'm going to do the surprise for you, it.

[D]

Be home like that.

[A]

Your two sisters.

[B]

My dad, probably the first one to see you. Cuz he's the first one that wakes up.

[A]

Really? Yeah. Well, maybe I'll have. I'll help me position the bow.

[B]

Oh yeah, you would love.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

He'd love. He'd love for you to be under the Christmas tree.

[A]

If I called your dad, hang out with you and was like, I have this idea. It's completely serious. I want to supply as an alley naked under the Christmas tree.

[B]

Oh yeah, he'd be down, of course.

[A]

No, actually, what do you think he'd say, David?

[B]

He'd like laugh, like try to laugh it off. And he'd be like, are you ser. Okay. Are you serious?

[D]

Wrap your penis.

[A]

What?

[B]

All right.

[A]

Do you need help or you think he'd be down?

[B]

Yeah, of course. He'll do anything for you.

[A]

Wow, that's really sweet.

[D]

Yeah, we have a lot of good parents that way.

[A]

What do you mean we have a lot of good parents?

[D]

Well, I feel like there's a lot of good people out there that would go the extra mile for you, right?

[A]

Oh, are you talking like everybody's parents?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh yeah.

[D]

Like there was somebody else's parent. That was really cool.

[A]

Ask me what I want for Christmas.

[B]

What do you want for Christmas, David?

[A]

Um, I just want to be left alone.

[B]

Really? Yeah, like a day off. Nobody texting you, nobody calling you. Just in bed by yourself. No one's at the house. Would you really enjoy that? I don't think so.

[A]

No. It's actually worries me how much you don't love hanging out with me every second as much as I love hanging out with all of you guys.

[B]

Oh, please.

[A]

What?

[B]

You're so twisted and evil. It's like such manipulative.

[A]

How can we explain it? Why? Did I just say something manipulative?

[B]

Yeah, but like it's not like I'm like, hey, I want to Go bowling tonight. You're going to come hang out with me, right? It's like, okay, we're going to come to dinner.

[A]

If you said that, we'd definitely go bowling.

[B]

I've suggested bowling, actually, several times, and nobody has wanted to go this entire fucking holiday season.

[A]

Oh, oh. Is it a group decision to not go? Because I would never, like, I'd never shoot down bowling for the group.

[B]

Or, like, if we're going to watch a movie at your house, it's like you're the one picking it. Like nobody else gets to say.

[A]

Because I've seen them most movies at the most experience.

[B]

No.

[A]

Have an excuse for everything.

[B]

And like, if we're ordering food, it's like, well, what's David hungry for? Does he want a burger or you want.

[A]

You just ordered a shrimp toast avocado. That's disgusting. You definitely have freedom to order whatever you want.

[D]

Does everything need to be on your terms?

[A]

No, it's.

[B]

You never come and hang out with me at my house.

[A]

I can't fit. There's no room to breathe. I'm suffocating in there. Natalie, please.

[D]

If Natalie had a terminal illness, would you go to her house and watch a movie?

[A]

If Natalie's mom had a terminal illness.

[B]

My mom.

[D]

Hang on.

[A]

Sorry. Yeah, sorry.

[D]

I know you want Jen dead, but.

[A]

Just stop doing this.

[D]

Knock on wood.

[A]

We love Jen. No, I love Jen. Can we stop with those jokes?

[B]

Oh, shit. You're such a weird.

[A]

But I have to balance out the.

[D]

Fact that I just said I thought it was interesting. You said, don't you want to spend. I don't think it's manipulative. I think he really does like spending every second with you.

[A]

Yeah. I don't know why she reacted like that. Like, I'm just like, that's.

[D]

But you're right, it is on his terms.

[A]

It is on my terms. I get that.

[B]

We're just doing everything David wants to.

[D]

Do, which is fine.

[B]

Like, we're having a great time. We're having a great time.

[D]

Well, he writes the checks, for sure.

[A]

Fortunately, David wants to do the coolest things ever.

[D]

Well, like watch Tuber by the Dozen too.

[A]

It's a classic. Way better than the first because they're on the lake.

[D]

It was good when I just don't.

[B]

Like how, like, when I'm with you hanging out, it's kind of hard. Like, there's not really a boundary there. And you will ask me to do work, you know, like, I will have to. I'm still working. Like, I still have to do, like, I still have obligations, and if I move.

[A]

So that's why you like your. Your break?

[B]

Yeah, that's why I need a break.

[A]

Okay, that makes sense.

[D]

Who has it the best out of all your friends? That's actually Natalie, Ilya, Alex, or John or me.

[A]

It depends how much they worry about their future.

[D]

Okay, right.

[A]

So, like, what is that?

[B]

What does that mean? What is that? How does that.

[A]

You kind of know what I mean, because I kind of don't know neither. You know what I'm saying? Like, currently right now, I think Alex has it the best because he's just.

[D]

Learned to be a DJ.

[A]

He's just, like, kind of DJing.

[B]

He's just chilling.

[A]

Not kind of he's DJing, but he's chilling.

[E]

And he's like, you know, try to get responsibilities.

[A]

Yeah. He's using the sauna in the middle of the day, but John now has a job, right? Yeah, that's working for me.

[D]

Okay. So, like, Natalie, obviously probably makes the most making money.

[A]

Yeah. But I think Alex has the best setup. Like, fun room, fun vibe.

[D]

I think I have the best setup.

[A]

Really?

[D]

I think my setup is really good.

[B]

Really?

[D]

I think I'm really blessed.

[A]

What's your setup?

[D]

I do the podcast twice a week, and then I edit. It takes me a couple hours. It's a total of, like, 10 hours of work.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But then we make you do, like, 14 hours of makeup.

[A]

And that's true.

[D]

That's true. But I liked. I like doing.

[B]

That is true.

[A]

When you were in the Squidward makeup.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

One of the comments was, poor Jason. When will David let him go? That was a gun to your head for the Squidward ring.

[D]

It's really.

[B]

You've transformed, like, a lot recently. I feel like you've done, like, three or four.

[A]

I love transforming. Jason, I know.

[B]

You're the best.

[A]

It's really sad, though, when, like, when it doesn't work. When it doesn't work and Jason's in the makeup and you could just. You could hear the life leaving him. Like, especially with Squidward. Squidward, we couldn't get any jokes. And Jason's never seen spongebob. Yeah. So that didn't really help. Yeah.

[D]

And I got paid to do it. Yeah.

[A]

We were doing, like, a promo for spongebob, too.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And. And Jason was like. I was like, jay, talk about, like, Squidward would. Let's plug the movie, but have Squidward complain about it. Like, the laughter is too much. Blah, blah, blah, Complain about it. And Jason goes, that darn spongebob. Always stealing my Spotlight. And I'm like, okay, wait, have you never seen spongebob? He's like, no, I've never seen spongebob. Like, you just sat through four hours of makeup to be Squidward and you've never seen an episode?

[D]

Yeah, that was a mistake.

[A]

That's really funny. You kind of did a good job. Yeah, the vibes were good. Wait, what was I going to say? I was going to say something.

[D]

How do you think your Christmas morning is going right now? Like, what are you doing right now?

[B]

I'm having the best time. I love. I love Christmas. I love Christmas morning. I just had my entire family over for Christmas Eve dinner. It's the best. We play games, we drink wine. It's amazing. We dance and sing and then we wake up in the morning.

[A]

What if there's a bomb that went off in your house and you have no idea and you're talking about, in the future, died. Oh, you know what I mean?

[B]

All right, this is like.

[A]

Because, like, it's not. This is the Christmas episode, but we're recording it three days before Christmas, and Natalie just spoke in the tents as if everything already happened. Right, but what if that's not what happens?

[D]

Who would put a bomb in her house?

[A]

I don't know.

[D]

They'd go after you. They would go after her.

[A]

Jen.

[D]

Oh, that's true. Jen's got a past. But Jen's not going to be there.

[A]

And. Yeah, that doesn't. That doesn't.

[D]

No, Jen's in la.

[A]

Yeah, that's what she wants. You. That's her alibi.

[D]

Do you think your mom explosives in.

[A]

The living room, under the tree, right by my penis. Oh, shit.

[D]

You're in there too.

[A]

Yes, exactly.

[D]

Just revealed your cock to the entire family.

[A]

Jen plants the bomb on Natalie's other side of the family, under the tree. She notices I am there. She gets like a little extra laugh and she's like two in one and then leaves on her fucking broomstick, flies away.

[D]

And then after you guys are blown up and you and Natalie are dying on Christmas morning, your last words, Natalie leans over and she goes, hey, that's not the only bomb. And she lifts her right leg and she goes. And it's the last thing you hear, and then you die.

[A]

Oh, okay, so that's like when we're, like, getting out of energy.

[D]

Yeah. Oh.

[A]

Oh, I thought she'd, like, do that in heaven.

[D]

Okay, maybe we could. We could do a rewrite, put it towards heaven.

[A]

You think you're gonna go to heaven, Nat? Because it's pretty obvious you're going to hell. But do you think that there's a.

[B]

Chance I don't like how you paint me out to be like, some, like, evil woman?

[A]

Like, evil woman. Evil woman.

[B]

That's my theme song.

[A]

That's a funny theme song. I'm kidding. Obviously, I'm kidding. You get weirdly defensive about it, which makes me think maybe you are.

[B]

Well, because I like, people actually comment that, and it hurts me. People think I'm mean.

[D]

She really cut to it there.

[B]

I mean, not that it's solely your.

[A]

Fault, but k. I'm a.

[D]

What do they say about you? What are the. What's the. What's something you read that hurt your feelings?

[B]

Gosh, I don't know. Oh, like that I fell off or something. I don't know.

[A]

Well, yeah, you fell off.

[B]

Actually, no. I actually get the reverse. People actually, like, hype me up now. They're like, oh, my God, she's gotten more beautiful. How crazy.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Right now, just right back. Well, you never on.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Where the are you?

[D]

That was my greatest comeback of all time. I was on Tik Tok Live. It was me and Batch, and this, like, really hot shot Tik Tok live streamer gets on, and he's like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Look who it is. Two guys that fell off, and then I go. And one that never got on.

[A]

That's pretty good. What did he say?

[D]

He went, ah, damn. He goes, that was good.

[A]

That's really funny.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I love when humans can roast each other and just have fun.

[D]

Yeah. I love when I have the joke ready. Lots of times I don't. A lot of times I just take it. I go, oh, no.

[A]

Okay. Yeah. It is quite often. You're just kind of.

[D]

It is quite often. I don't feel like. I don't feel like rebuttaling, and I don't have anything to say. Like, the other thing is, too, is, like, there's certain people that, like, I don't want to go there. I don't want to, like, say the mean thing. I have a problem, like, going too far. And then, like, people are like, jason, why'd you say that? Yeah, it's the worst.

[A]

I have friends like that.

[D]

Yeah. Mine turns out mean because I'm so attractive.

[A]

What?

[B]

So are you talking about evil woman?

[D]

Hey, I watched Chappelle's Special.

[A]

Dave Chappelle Tonight Special?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Really?

[D]

Yeah, it's good. I thought it was great, but it's the best joke. Oh, man.

[A]

I heard Louis CK Something say something that was funny. What'd he Say, he said, I'm so old, I may have to get circumcised twice.

[B]

Oh, that's really good.

[D]

That's really good. Do you get it, Nat?

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[D]

He's like, penis is so droopy. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, that's awesome.

[D]

And now you don't have a penis.

[A]

That's awesome. Now you want to hear more penis jokes?

[B]

I do love penis.

[A]

If you could re up as a girl or boy in your next life, what are you going to do?

[B]

No, I like me. I like who I am.

[A]

You like girl?

[B]

Yeah, I think so.

[A]

Yeah, but you'd be able to start fresh.

[B]

Yeah, but, like, being a man is like, really? Yeah, men are so gross. Like, being a woman is like, beautiful.

[A]

Nelly, have you be nicer. Dave, it's Christmas.

[D]

Remembering today she looked exactly like Meg from Family Guy because she had that parka on.

[A]

Oh, yeah. She is very Meg from Family Guy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Allie has a lot of moods.

[D]

She's also hungover.

[A]

She's kind of like a dog.

[D]

Yeah. Sometimes she looks really beautiful.

[A]

Sometimes she's grouchy.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Sometimes cute.

[D]

She got it all.

[A]

Sometimes she's pooping in the wrong place. No, I'm not creating a scent in the room.

[B]

Stop saying that. That's the other thing I get. People think I like myself. They send me that in the DMs. You're probably yourself right now.

[A]

I'm not coming. That Natalie hates the most. What's up, Diarrhea girl?

[B]

Actually, though.

[D]

Hey, did you hear that?

[A]

Sorry I cut you off about the Chappelle Special, too.

[D]

No, I don't have anything to say about it. It's great.

[A]

Oh, yeah, quilt.

[D]

Someone commented, wait till they play December 19th Wordle.

[A]

So, guys, the other day we talked about Wordle. And as one of the tiebreakers for Wordle, Julia made up her own word. Not made up, but decided her own word for us to do the wordle on. And the word was quilt. We talked about it on the pod. And then three days after the pod went up, the fucking. The word. The official word for wordle was quilt. And everyone was DMing me like crazy. Like, you won't fucking believe what just happened. And people are like, I wonder if someone from the New York Times listens to the pod and all these questions. So I want to have a little challenge here for the New York Times.

[D]

There's no way.

[A]

Okay?

[B]

They're listening.

[D]

The world was probably decided entire year out.

[B]

Yeah, that's what I would think.

[D]

Yeah. Every day. And also, there's only so many five letter Words. And quilt's like a pretty fun word.

[B]

There's a lot of five letter words.

[A]

I feel wordle editor, Tracy Bennett. Maybe I should just DM her. I was gonna give another word suggestion, but it's kind of hard to decide words that they haven't used.

[D]

I don't think she's taking suggestions. I think they take wordle really seriously and they take themselves really seriously. You ever talking to somebody and you want to get out of the conversation so bad, and then you just laugh really hard. You're like, right. Oh, wait a minute. Now you're doing it to me. Damn. I guess you do do that. You want to get out of this conversation, jj. Jj.

[A]

Who else is around here? That was good.

[D]

That was really good. That should just be the podcast. Did you hear the girl's story that she was with Diddy the night before he got arrested?

[A]

No, I didn't. I heard you guys talking about this.

[B]

I thought she was kidding.

[A]

Wait, she was with him the night he got arrested?

[D]

Yeah, she was just, like, hanging out. She was with one of his sons.

[B]

She was at a Diddy party?

[D]

No, not really. But she was with him. She was with one of his sons. And she was like, they're like, oh, we're going to go back to my dad's place. So she goes back and bunch of strippers there. The strippers are like, hey, girl, how much you getting paid? And she's like, I'm not getting paid. I'm just trying to have fun. And then the next day, then eventually she met Diddy and she wanted to leave because she wanted a sandwich. She was really hungry.

[A]

This is a real story.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

Yeah. And she tells it, like, a lot. A little bit more scared than I'm telling it. Like, looking back, she's like, I don't know what could have happened. Because if you watch the documentary, they find, like, all the baby oil in the hotel. And she was there. Like, the documentary shows Diddy in that hotel. She was in that hotel right before he gets arrested.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[D]

That's what's so interesting about the documentary is that he's filming a documentary days before he's arrested. So when he gets arrested, he doesn't pay the guy. So the guy just sells the footage to 50. And that's what you're watching. You're watching 50's doc and Diddy's doc together. That's why the doc is so interesting.

[A]

What doc was Diddy filming?

[D]

His own? He was making his own, like, Diddy doc about getting arrested and going to jail. And who knows? He's just filming. He's filming just like we would be filming.

[A]

Wow.

[D]

Except he's about to be arrested.

[A]

Okay, so what was her story with being at his party? It was just the fact that she left because she needed a sandwich.

[D]

Yeah, no, she. She went back and she's like. She's like, when I get drunk, I get really hungry. She's like, all I want to do is eat. So we went back to this hotel. She's like. And I remember going back to the hotel and being like, why is the FBI across the way? Like, why is the FBI occupying the next building over and looking in at our hotel room? And they're like, oh, she could see it. Yeah. Like, and that. You can see it in the dock too. The FBI is staked out there watching.

[A]

Him, just like waiting for the moment to arrest him.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Why were they waiting for so long? Why didn't they arrest him?

[D]

Like, maybe they needed the. The warrant from the judge or whatever it took to. For the D. A to get clearance to go arrest him.

[A]

And she was partying her while that was happening.

[D]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

That's fucking madness.

[D]

I don't know. So, yeah, so that was what happened. And anyways, Free Diddy.

[A]

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[D]

I got a bunch of stuff from Momentous. I got the whey protein, I got the creatine.

[A]

Only the healthiest stuff. They use grass fed European dairy cows.

[D]

Yes. Then the. The protein is amazing, David. It's 80 calories a scoop. I have it in the afternoon, like, so I don't snack. I have it after my workout. It's clean. I've got the sleep pouches right here. I brought you some.

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

Guys, to continue the podcast, I have my, my forever friends here, Taylor and Alex. Jason is off doing his Christmas things. We're giving him a break, but don't worry because I'm turning it up with these two, the only two people on Chris. We're recording this on Christmas day, by the way. So you're getting this podcast Christmas Day and we're recording it Christmas. It's basically like you're at a live show.

[E]

So Jason's gonna be editing it on Christmas day.

[A]

Jason will be editing this? Well, no, I want to do this in one go. So no editing. We just give it to him as like a Christmas gift, like packaged. So don't say anything racist, Taylor, because we can't be cutting things out.

[C]

Okay, I'll be careful.

[A]

Okay. Taylor's here. Taylor I've known for about three years now.

[C]

Oh, my gosh.

[A]

I'm just kidding. She gets so offended. Taylor hates when I challenge our friendship.

[D]

Right?

[C]

Yeah, well, because I just, I don't think you actually, you know, remember that it's been almost eight years.

[A]

We were at the bank, we at the bank the other day and like, it was like a pretty, like stressful environment because there's this guy right next to us that like pulled up at the bank and was like, hey, I was here earlier and two idiots served me here and they're complete idiots and they shouldn't be working here. I don't care if it's their first day. And then I turned to Tay and I was like, tay, like, would you, could you work here, like, and be Part of this, like, ecosystem. And, like, you could just. You could just see, like, how uncomfortable it makes Tay when I. When I ask her if she could work other jobs. For some reason, she's like a little kid when I ask her questions like that, because it makes her think I'm, like, giving her up for adoption.

[C]

But you kind of do it all the time.

[A]

Well, now I do it all the time. But when I initially would do it and I was like, tay, like, how do you feel about maybe not working for, like, a couple of weeks? She would, like, go into, like, a serious panic.

[C]

I just love working.

[A]

No, what is it? Why do you. Why can you not. What happens if I. If I just decide I want to go my separate way and move to Jamaica?

[C]

Then I'll support you.

[A]

And you'd leave me?

[E]

You'd come with me?

[C]

Yeah. And then I'd have to move to Jamaica.

[A]

Oh, you'd support me by moving to Jamaica?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

No, I just.

[A]

Is there a place you wouldn't follow now that you have a cat? I feel like, oh, my gosh.

[C]

Yeah. Don't even get me started.

[A]

I feel like maybe it's a little tougher. But we are at the. Anyway, we were at the bank, and I had to get money out because I was getting, like, a Christmas gift, and I never go to the bank, but there was nobody here, so I was doing, you know, Natalie's doing duties and Brooks duties. I was going to the bank to get a cashier's check, and I've never even been to this bank. I don't even know who I bank with. I don't know my passwords. I don't know anything.

[C]

That's crazy.

[A]

This is my first time at this specific bank.

[C]

And, mind you, like, they didn't believe that David was actually David because he. He doesn't know anything.

[A]

They were like, driver's license. I'm like, I don't carry driver's license. You don't have.

[E]

I don't know.

[A]

I don't have a credit card. Oh, my God. Like, all I have is a passport. Like, I do seem like a stranger walking.

[E]

Look, Don't I look like a David Dover?

[D]

Come on.

[A]

Right? But luckily, the, like, the three kids that work there, like, all knew who I was. And the woman's like, listen, I understand. They know who you are. Whatever. But there's a password on your account. Like, this is it. This isn't. This isn't normal.

[E]

Like, they can't get in without it.

[A]

No, they know the password. Like, you looking at it they're like, you verbally have to tell us your password, or we can't give you the money. Like, because my account has multiple restrictions on it set by my account and stuff like that. And I'm like, I have no idea what the password is. Like, I don't know the password again to any of my logins anywhere. And then the banker. The bank. So the woman's, like, working at the computer. And then the teller behind the woman starts going, like. Starts mouthing things and, like, starts, like. Like doing, like, this, like, airplane signal. He's, like, pretending he's an airplane. I'm like, what? And the woman, like, doesn't really notice me. And he's like. And he keeps making, like, these sounds. And then he's. He's like, charading me my password. Cause he's looking at it. And then I'm like, okay, obviously it's not this, but it was very close to this. But I'm like, okay, try. Try airplane pickle. And Taylor's looking through all our passwords, like, on, like, this note sheet we brought in. And Taylor's like, airplane pickle's not on here. Where would you get that from? And I'm like, it's there. Taylor, look. And the bank teller is, like, looking at Taylor. I'm like, taylor, shut up. I'm, like, trying to kick, like, step on her toe.

[C]

I don't see it.

[B]

I don't see it.

[A]

She's like, where did you pull that out of? I don't see. But airplane pickle is like, a password I used, like, a really long time ago or very similar to that. And then I got into my bank account, thanks to. It was kind of like a heist, honestly.

[E]

Yeah. That's crazy.

[A]

But the guy. I've met the guy before, like, you know, he was doing me a favor, and it was my money. I wasn't. I wasn't stealing. But Taylor's here. I've known her for eight years.

[C]

Thank you.

[A]

And Alex is here. I've known him for the longest time, too. When did I meet you?

[E]

When we were, like, 12.

[A]

That's crazy. I think I've known Alex the longest out of all.

[E]

Yeah, I mean, I'm like, double Taylor. She's got nothing.

[A]

How did you feel? Like, because we were best friends when we were 12.

[D]

Right.

[A]

And then we kind of tapered off when Ilya came in.

[C]

How did Ilya come in?

[A]

Yeah. Did you feel. Was there some sort of, like, during.

[E]

High school when Ilya came in?

[A]

Yeah. Were you, like. Were you like, Dave and Ilya are getting really close.

[E]

No, no, because I, I had. We had our alone time, right? And then.

[D]

Wait, wait, what do you mean?

[A]

What do you mean?

[E]

Like, you would go hang out with the cool kids in Ilya.

[A]

I would not hang out with the cool kids in Ilia. Why?

[E]

Dude, why do you say that?

[A]

Who would I hang out with? The cool.

[E]

Like, like Rhino Pitts.

[A]

Oh, yeah, but who were the cool.

[C]

Kids at your school? Like, were they the football players?

[A]

Nervik? Roy. Damn. I have like, Pierce. I have this superpower.

[E]

A little stoner period with the cool kids.

[A]

I have the superpower where I can tell if a person's hot or not based on their name. So Taylor, give me somebody from your school.

[B]

Uh huh.

[A]

Like, give me a girl's name.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

And don't tell me if she's hot or not. And I will tell you if it was a hot girl based on her name. Okay, go ahead.

[C]

Macy Julinsky.

[A]

Yeah. Now that's really tough, but I'm obviously leaning towards hot.

[C]

Yes, she was.

[A]

See, it's incredible. Now give me another name. Actually, this isn't fair because you're not gonna call out somebody that's not hot because that'd be kind of rude, right?

[E]

Ugly.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

No, but that just reminded me of.

[C]

Like, Al Taylor Hudson Ugly.

[A]

Yo. You know what was crazy? That we used to do gym.

[E]

Yes.

[A]

Without changing. With what were you gonna say? Wait, what do you.

[E]

Well, without showering. No, we change into the clothes that we sweat in for five days before.

[A]

Oh, that's crazy too.

[E]

Yeah. And then we don't shower.

[A]

There used to be a time where there was pe, like in elementary school where you just go and you just do activities in your clothes.

[D]

Was there?

[A]

Yes.

[E]

Oh, like elementary school.

[A]

Because I remember someone saying that was weird because going into middle school I was terrified because I was like, like, I'm gonna have to change in front of people. And I was always uncomfortable about my body and I was like, oh my God. Like, I can't fucking. I can't. I can't change in front of people. Like, I can't have people see my nipples. Like, I can't do it. But then this is a guy who made. Made it really comfortable. Remember Austin? Austin, the guy who'd pee in the urinal with his. With his, like, pants down? No, no, with his pants down to his ankles.

[E]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

So this is canard grade, who would pee with his pants down all the way to his ankles and full butt. Everything was out. And it very much made me a Lot more comfortable, to be honest, to see him, like assless, like with his ass out and everything. It gave me the confidence to change in gym class. But yeah, that is kind of crazy that we would just get fucking sweaty as dick. So weird and so sweaty. Gym class wasn't like, you didn't. You didn't opt out of gym class activities. Right. Like, everyone participated in it.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And gave it their hundred percent.

[E]

I mean, if you like sports.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. But it wasn't like. How do I say it? Like it was cool to participate. It wasn't like frown. Like, like all the cool kids, all the athletic kids. Yeah, yeah. Would try really hard, therefore you'd actually come back drenched. And then you would like put on your shirt and you'd go back to school. And I remember one of our art teachers was always like, none of you are wearing deodorant. She wouldn't swear, but like, she'd be like, none of you guys are wearing deodorant. You guys smell disgusting. She'd say it literally, literally every time. Do you remember her?

[D]

This ring?

[A]

I think so. It was that the one that was allergic to perfume? No, that was a different one. Cause that would make sense. But she was like, none of you would wear deodorant. And at the time I wasn't wearing deodorant. Cause like, I don't know if it's. Cause I'm from Slovakia. But like, I was a late bloomer to everything and like, my parents didn't really, like, didn't buy me deodorant. They also, my mom, for a long time, like, made working out seem like it was a thing for like 30 year olds. So like when people started working out in school, it was like the same reaction I had when I found out kids were masturbating. I was like, wait, you guys are doing this this early? It was really weird. So like, so like, I didn't get to deodorant till I was like, probably 16. And I didn't get to masturbating. So I was like quite recently. And then working out took me till 28. But. But yeah.

[E]

So maybe you'll start carrying your ID when you're 40.

[A]

Yeah, exactly. So I'm a really late bloomer just because I'm from a third world country or a different country. But. But yeah. So we would go back sweaty and. Yeah. Okay. So you weren't offended that Ilya was slowly moving up in the ranks?

[E]

No, no, no. I knew there's still like, you know, a special, special bond.

[A]

It's Cross meme the other day. That's like. That's like, friend. Like, guy friends, especially. Tay, you can, like, attest to this. Like, guy friends can not text for, like, months, and then they can. They flip a switch right when they're back. I don't think girls do that.

[E]

No girls do that.

[C]

I think it depends. I recently just had a gathering with my high school friends, and I do think that that stands for, like, guys are way more laid back when it comes to, like, we don't have to talk every day, but girls, I think it's like, there's some that, you know, you have to keep in touch with, and then there's some, like, I haven't seen the girls that I was just with. We barely talk, but every time we're together, it's like, it was. We're back in high school.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Hmm. I don't know about that. I think guys are better.

[C]

I definitely agree.

[A]

Like, no, no, no. I could actually kind of see it anyway. High school. High school's.

[E]

I feel like it tastes good.

[A]

No, but. No, not only that, but I feel like high school's a rare exception. I think, like.

[E]

Oh, that's true.

[A]

Like, I think everybody in high school.

[E]

Like, are you just, like, reminiscing the whole time?

[C]

But we also, like, have kept up here and there. Like, we got. We went to, like, colleges that way.

[A]

High school's nostalgia bait, brother. Yeah.

[C]

But I feel like. So when I first met you guys and understood your high school friendships, I related so much to, like, my own because I loved high school. My high school friends were, like, what raised me, in a sense. But I feel like a lot of people don't have that. Like, I know certain people that we became friends with after high school that weren't our friends in high school.

[A]

Hey, remember when you moved to LA and you were.

[C]

I didn't have friends, but, yeah, I.

[A]

Always think about that. It made me so sad. Really so sad. I think about it, like. I'm not even kidding. I think about it once a month.

[C]

I know, because you always bring it.

[E]

Up, but you had no friends. I thought Tate knows people in, like.

[A]

No. There was, like, a moment in LA where she was, like. Like, she was, like, teetering between friends, and she didn't have, like, a connection between anybody, and it was really sad.

[E]

Close.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Like, I felt like I was Tay's only friend. Yeah. And she didn't have, like, all her girlfriends and everything. And it was really sad.

[C]

It was before, like, I met everyone here before Mlan.

[A]

Oh, wow. Yeah. And, like. And, like, she was, like. She was, like, verbal about it where it was, like, triple sad. So, like. So, like, I think about it a lot. Like, a lot. And then now I think about how many friends she has now, and, like, she's too many. Yeah, she's too many. She's basically like a siamese twin to McLean, too. Like, they're literally lesbian lovers. Like, it's fucking insane. So it's. She's made a serious pivot, so. I'm proud of you, Tay.

[C]

Oh, thank you. Just took a little bit of time.

[A]

Just. Yeah. What advice do you have for people that are struggling to find friends in new cities?

[C]

Just keep putting yourself out there, and it'll come to you.

[A]

Where did you meet your best friend now?

[C]

My best friend? McClain. Yeah, I actually. It's really. It's really scary because I. I think at my high school reunion the other day, our little meetup, I talked about McLain for, like, an hour, and they were like, wow, she sounds great. I texted McClain the next day, and.

[A]

I was like, I met the most.

[C]

Wonderful person that was literally me.

[D]

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[A]

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[D]

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[A]

Excludes Massachusetts.

[B]

This episode is brought to you by McAfee. I got a message that our flight was canceled, but they can put us on another flight, and we just need.

[C]

To confirm our credit card info.

[B]

Wait, I got a security alert from McAfee. It flagged that message as a scam. McAfee's scam detector automatically spots and alerts you to suspicious texts, emails, and deepfake videos. Learn [e-mail] online protection.

[A]

Oh, you know what Alex told me the other day that I bailed him out of jail. Did we talk about here? I didn't bail you out of jail. I picked you up from jail.

[E]

Yeah, it's crazy.

[A]

You don't.

[E]

You have a really good memory. I'm shocked you remember that.

[A]

I have a really bad memory. Like, really bad. Memory. Like, an incredibly, incredibly terrible memory.

[E]

When you're arguing with Natalie, you seem to think you have 100% correctness.

[A]

Well, I remember things. I remember things with, like, Natalie, but, like, what. What do I remember?

[C]

You remember, like, random things that. But then you. You forget, like, other. Like, I don't know. I think it's just like, if something. There's something in your brain where, like, you remember certain things. Like, even going back to, like, memories in high school, like, you remember very specific things, but then some. Some things just go over your head. Like, you.

[E]

It was never, like, really specific, but, like, completely me.

[A]

I'll meet a girl, right? And I, like. I'll hang out with a girl once, twice, three times, whatever. And, like, you will remember. And my mom. My mom. My memory will just be wiped clean, like I'm telling you. Like, clean, like, where? It's like. Where. It's like.

[E]

Because there's so many.

[A]

No, it's like, I'm just, like, so bad at it. I don't. I don't have a memory. I don't know what it is. I think something's happened to me recently that's, like, just like.

[C]

No, that's why I have to remind you that we've known each other for so long, because sometimes they actually do think you're like, oh, it's been, like, three years.

[A]

I think my storage is full because of high school. I genuinely think I have to, like, upgrade to 2 terabytes. I think something's going on. I think. I think. I think I hold so.

[E]

Too many good memories.

[A]

I think I hold so many. High school. Oh, sorry. What were you saying? I bailed you out. Yeah, I didn't bail you. I picked you up from jail, and I don't remember this at all.

[E]

Yeah, when I was, like, I don't know, 20. So, like, almost 10 years ago, I got arrested or detained.

[A]

Well, arrested, because you were. You went to jail. Did it get put on your record?

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Arrested?

[B]

Yes.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

For.

[E]

For weed possession.

[A]

And how much were you carrying?

[E]

It was like an eighth.

[A]

An eighth. Which is like how many little baggies I used to love. I used to love buying weed in high school.

[E]

It was like.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[E]

I think it was, like, 80 bucks.

[A]

80 bucks.

[E]

It was an ace.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

So it's like.

[A]

Were you there the first time? Oh. Oh, okay. So I led you down this road. Hell, yeah.

[E]

Yeah, you did.

[A]

Alex smoked with me for the first time.

[C]

How old were you?

[A]

And then you got. Wait, let me. Let you. Sorry. Let you finish your story about how you got arrested? Were you. Where were you smoking? Where they found you? We were. We were smoking. We were hot.

[E]

Boxing a car. Two blunts. Classic.

[A]

Incredible.

[E]

And then we drove three people. Yeah, we drove to McDonald's at like 1am and my friend cut off a cop. And my friend in the back is like, yo, you just cut off a cop.

[A]

I started freaking out because I had.

[E]

I had a scale on me because I was like.

[A]

You had a scale?

[E]

Yeah, a scale. I had it in a mason jar because I was, like, trying to smoke for free. So I would, like. I would, like, sell a certain amount just to get me enough to smoke the rest for free, if that makes sense.

[A]

Oh, my God. That's like. That's like some crackhead shit.

[E]

And my friend, you weren't even.

[A]

You were a drug dealer just to get high off your own product. You weren't even a drug dealer.

[E]

I wasn't even making money.

[A]

That's. That's kind of the scariest kind of drug dealer, dude. It's terrifying. Okay? My.

[E]

I just told him, like, yeah, I just don't want to get shorted, cuz, like, I didn't have a lot on me, so I just, like, I got to make sure I have the right amount and I don't get shorted. My friends, like, back me up without communicating with each other. They just, like.

[A]

They told the cop on that. Yeah, they told the cop, he's not a dealer. He's only doing this so he can have enough to keep smoking this illegal substance.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Or. I don't.

[E]

I don't know exactly what they told him, but. Yeah.

[A]

What do you mean back you up? You still went to jail?

[E]

Well, no, because that was just for possession, not for, like, with intent to distribute.

[A]

Oh, so. So you. They. They didn't book you for intent? No, because they're like, this kid's just really poor. Yeah, that's really crazy. And. And I.

[E]

Well, I kept everything on me too, because I didn't want to bring anything in my house. So I always, like, had my shit on me.

[A]

So the cops, like, that's crazy. So the cop literally was like, I'm gonna give you less of a charge because I know you're just hiding this from your mom.

[E]

I don't even know that's right.

[A]

And then what time did I pick you up at?

[E]

So then, yeah, I obviously don't want my. Didn't want my parents to know. So I called you because I know you're probably up, like, playing cod or something. And, yeah, I was like, It'll be like 2 or 3am and you came and picked me up.

[A]

Wow.

[E]

Police station.

[A]

Wow. That's amazing.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. No idea I did that. That's really fun. That was. Dude, there's nothing better than the whole process about weed because, like, a crisp $20 bill would exchange you for a beautiful baggie. And every time you got a new bag of weed, the first thing you do is you open it and you smell it and you give it to your friend. You go, smell this. And every time it's like, whoa. Every time. That was the reaction. Even though it's like, yeah, they all smell like weed. And then best part is, like, making the plans. And then you'd all get into one car, drive into a neighborhood that you don't really think that a lot of cops visit, and you'd park in the guest parking of a neighborhood, and you just get really high. And every car that comes by is like. It's like you're in, like, a. It's like.

[E]

That is the cop.

[A]

Yeah. It's like you're in a Terminator movie, and, like, there's just, like, drones flying around. And, like, you have to avoid every single headlight because it's a police officer. And, like, when you get high, obviously you get involved. You get way more paranoid. And that's why I always say, like, getting paranoid when you're high is my favorite thing because, like, I know it's not real. I just enjoy it so much. The sweat of, like, it could so temporary, and you feel like this, like, fucking criminal, but you're really just trying to get to Taco Bell. That's, like, the whole mission. That's really funny. Okay, sorry. So where were we going after that?

[C]

My friends smoked weed in high school, but we got drug tested, so they would have to. Everyone that smoked would carry pee. And it was always the girls. Huh?

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

No, you're on it, Tay. Wait, dude, get with it.

[C]

Yeah. What do you not understand?

[E]

So that they can test negative.

[C]

Oh, because we did drug testing. Yeah.

[A]

Everyone would carry.

[C]

Or everyone who smoked, we would have to carry pee on them because they are.

[E]

I am confused, like, at all times.

[A]

That's what I'm saying.

[C]

Yeah. Because you have pee in your bag.

[A]

100% of the time on you.

[C]

Like, and that's why, like, the girls with, like, bigger tits would, like, hold it. Like, the perfect spot is, like, in your tits. But, like, clearly I couldn't do that.

[A]

Damn.

[C]

I also didn't smoke. I only, like, tried me.

[A]

Could you smoke because you had Smaller boobs. That sucks.

[C]

I also just had a really bad experience my first time. Similar to your story. It was like, hot boxing car. And then I was, like, paranoid. But, no, my girlfriends with the bigger tits, they got away with it because they would. You have to have it on you. Like, it couldn't be in a bag, right?

[A]

Because you can't go to the bathroom with a bag.

[C]

They would get you. Like, our school is, like, smart and, like, sticklers. Like, they would get you when you were changing. Like, I had performance dance, and you would have to change into your dance clothes, and they would give you the slip, like, and you have to go immediately. Like, as soon as you get the slip, you have to go with whatever's on you.

[A]

Yeah. That's wild. So people would just have, like, little Mason jars of their own piss, like, little, like, tiny.

[C]

Yeah, they would just keep little, tiny vinyls.

[A]

That's fucking. What did they test you for? Like, with.

[C]

No, they would test us for, like. Well, they said that they would, like, test us for all drugs. And they specifically would point out or, like, call out the party people, which was definitely my friend group.

[A]

But how is that even, like, legal? You can do that in a school. You can randomly.

[C]

Yeah. Did I never tell you the story? I think I've. I might have told it on the podcast before, but a teacher reported me, and this was when I was brand new to the school.

[A]

Oh, I remember this.

[C]

Yeah. And reported me for smelling like alcohol. And I was so innocent. Like, never touched alcohol in my life. And I was scared shitless. I literally. I will never forget. And they were, like. They were, like, really mean to me. And I went to the dean's office and I sat there shaking, and I had a blow, like, blow into the little thing, and it was 0.00. And they were like. Then after that, they were so nice to me. But when I did meet my new friends and became, like, a part of the party people, they would always. At every single school, every single school dance, I was always, like, one of the ones who would get, like, had to be breathalyzed.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[C]

At all the school dances, your little troublemaker.

[A]

They had you on the most wanted list. I was talking to Taylor Fritz, who's the number one Titans player in the US and he's training for the Olympics. And he was telling me, the Olympics, they're not for a couple years, right? Just to be clear, this summer, next year after. Well, regardless, they're not for a year or two. But he was telling me that now when you're entering the Olympics as he is. They can come and drug test you whenever they want, wherever you are in the world. And you have to report where you are every day or two to the people. So he just took a. He just took a. He just took a, like a vacation to Tokyo, Japan. And obviously it's the check in. Like he has a probation officer. Like literally probation officer, but for the Olympics. And then they just showed up at his hotel and randomly drug tested him. Like that's how, that's how.

[E]

Wait, for steroids or for like we steroids.

[A]

Oh, and drugs?

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Really?

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

Well, that's like the Olympics.

[A]

Like, isn't that. That's wild. That's.

[E]

So you can't just like all willy nilly just decide like, oh, I want to go to fucking Europe.

[A]

You can, but you just, you have to tell them and then they'll find you. In Europe they have people in every country and they're like, show up to your hotel if it's like, if you randomly called for it. But yeah, he just got someone to come to Japan, but okay. The story I was trying to think of earlier was I was there for the first time. You got high.

[E]

Oh.

[A]

Which was like, how did that, how did that get us? Why did I smoke weed before you? That's, that's like.

[E]

Cuz you were cool, dude.

[A]

I'm telling you because you were sick.

[E]

I don't know. It all just depends on the people you.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Get around.

[A]

Who did I smoke weed with for the first time? Probably Mia, right? Yeah. Yeah. So it's Mia and then shout out Mia for getting me introduced to the marijuana. And then, and then I, I went back and like, I had very much had the exact same personality as a kid as I do have now. Or like, if I try something, the first thing I want to do is like, my friends have to try it. Like there's no fucking way around it. Like.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

So I probably went to you and I was like, you gotta try, it's incredible. And then what happened? So we went to this guy's house.

[E]

We went to this guy's basement. Like, classic stoner basement.

[A]

No, no, no. Like, I don't think people ever understand how classic stoner basement this was. Like, this was. I think he like lived with his grandma who like, was blind. It was like, I mean, it was like, oh, so like, you know in Deadpool, where that woman's blind.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And like Deadpool lives with that woman and she doesn't really know what's going on, but she does that that's exactly what was going on with this guy. And he was in the basement, basically, probably selling drugs to the whole community. And, like, that was probably the best place to experience it for the first. For the first time, because he had, like, all his little bongs on the table, all the different kinds of weed. And walk me through how that was the first experiment. Were you nervous?

[E]

Yeah, I was freaking out because, like, I. For some reason, I was. My sister had just had a baby, and I was, like, terrified that I'm like, a bad uncle. I'm like a criminal uncle.

[A]

Oh, I remember that. Yeah, I remember that. I remember sitting there. There's no better feeling than being there with your, like, best friend who's about to get high for the first time. And you've already experienced it, because I remember.

[E]

I don't know if I ever got that, like. Like, on the other side of it.

[A]

Like, you got to, like, pay it forward. Yeah, maybe with John, maybe. We went to, like, Deuce Pizzeria once in Chicago, and Billy and I gave him, what, a hundred bucks? Yeah. Yeah, a hundred bucks. Which was crazy at the time. Like, John was, like, so against weed. And we're like, john will give you a hundred bucks if you get high.

[B]

That's hilarious.

[A]

And John getting high is like. If you know John, it's already, like, a crazy level, like, whatever he's on. So it's that up to the next. Okay, sorry. So you're doing. You're about to smoke weed.

[E]

Yeah. And it was a bong, which was, like, the most complex concept to me in the world.

[A]

And everyone always says, you don't get high for the first time, but I don't think that's true. I think that's just, like, a thing that people say.

[C]

It's definitely not true.

[E]

Yeah. I don't know if they want to. If they're like, gatekeeping the industry, like. Yeah, you got to do more if you want to be like.

[A]

I think they're all. I think that's, like, a saying that you say just to, like, ease people into it. No one gets high. No one gets high the first time. But you can.

[E]

Yeah, I was.

[A]

That's, like, obviously not a thing. No one gets high the first time.

[C]

Wait, I feel like it's like the opposite, because you don't know how much. Like, I remember the first time I was given a blunt. I just kept going because I was like. You think of it like a. You see people smoke cigarettes.

[A]

Oh, I have a. I have. I'm a strong believer in Like, I say this today. I don't think it matters how much you smoke. I think one hit can do you the same as 20 hits. Like, I'll smoke a full joint.

[E]

So not true, dude.

[C]

That's not true.

[E]

Maybe for you.

[A]

I don't know. I don't know. I just think, like, one hit can really knock you on your ass. If it goes down the right pipe, hits the right part of your blood, or 20 can do absolutely nothing, and you're smoking like Snoop Dogg. And it feels the same as. As hitting once. But I remember you got high and then I told you. I told you.

[E]

Yeah, he. David told me to just scroll on Twitter the second. The second after you hit it, just scroll on Twitter. And then there's gonna be a moment where you're like, oh, my God, I'm so high. Like, what did I just read?

[A]

Did it happen? Yeah.

[E]

And then, like, after three minutes, I come to a realization. I'm like, oh, my God, he was right. Like, it's exactly how you described it.

[A]

That's really funny. And one of our favorite things to do. Well, we only did it, like, three or four times, I think, but was to go to Dunkin Donuts after we were high. Did you go with me to this?

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And Dunkin Donuts, if you came at the right time, they threw out all their donuts in a bag around the dumpster. And, like. No, but they threw it out really cleanly. Like, the dumpster was gross. But they, like, double bag this. Like, they double bag all the donuts. I'm talking, like, hundreds of donuts. And they were still good. Cause it was from that day. So we'd go there and we'd go into the dumpster, and we'd pull out the bag of donuts. And, you know, obviously when you're high, you eat them. But some of our friends, AKA Eric, don't want to. Don't want to dox him here. But Eric would go around and. Another popular thing. You know what you would do with the donuts, right?

[E]

Yeah. What, like, you throw them at cars?

[A]

No, you throw them on mailboxes.

[E]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Such a driver. Such a weird thing because it makes such a funny noise.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

If it's jelly filled, it had, like, some good thickness to it. And the way, like, the custard would, like, plop, like, on a mailbox was so funny. But it was vandalism. So you were like, it's better than there were people. There's this guy named Josh.

[E]

Yeah. Oh, my God. I was just going to bring that up. Who is, like, the next level of mailbox.

[A]

Mailbox. And he'd take bats to mailboxes.

[D]

They would.

[E]

Yeah, they would drive around, like, on.

[A]

A pickup truck and just. And they would lean out to the.

[E]

Side, just drive by mailboxes. And.

[A]

Which is really funny because it mails mail. Sometimes the mail would explode. I've never seen it, but I think I saw it in a movie. Bench warmers. I think that's where they got it from.

[E]

Oh, yeah, Yeah.

[A]

I think that's where, like, it originated from. And then you, you know, you get the right mailbox, and it blow up with all the mail. But it's a federal crime to tamper with a mailbox, so it's like, you really shouldn't do it. But, yes, a big thing was. Oh, you're right. Yeah, you're right. Throwing it at cars. Because I remember, like, cars would pass by, and you'd, like, try to hit a car, which is also, like, so fucking so illegal. It's so insane. But, yeah, that was. That was the best part of. Of getting high as a kid. And then obviously going to Taco Bell was, like, the next level. I can't recommend it anymore, but I think, guys, that's all the time we have for today's pod. I have to wrap it up. I hope Christmas was incredible for everybody.

[C]

What'd you get, David?

[A]

I got socks again. That was the first thing I opened was socks.

[C]

That's good.

[A]

What did you get?

[C]

I got money.

[A]

Your grandma sent you money?

[C]

My grandma sent me, actually. She sent me an ornament with me and Theodore and.

[A]

Oh, that's really sweet.

[C]

Yeah. And a little coffee cup with me and Theodore, and it says cat, mom, so. Yeah, she sends the best stuff.

[A]

I hope Theodore lives forever. Tay, for the sake of you. You really love that cat. Remember when we went to go get the cat and you were like, I'm making the right decision?

[C]

Yeah. And I did.

[A]

Wow, you really did. You really crushed it.

[C]

Oh, my gosh.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Well, thank you for joining me, everybody. Alex and Tay. Merry Christmas from the Views podcast fam. To all you guys. And we will see you guys for the next one. I think my next pod will be from Australia for New Year's. Actually, I don't know. You're from. No, no, no. It'll be from here. No, no. Yeah. Oh, yeah. The next pod will be with Jason, because Jason comes back right before my flight to Sydney. So I'll see you guys on Tuesday. Bye.

[D]

Bye.

[B]

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[D]

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