Sleeping With My Sister and Best Friend

Summary

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VIEWS Podcast: "Sleeping With My Sister and Best Friend"

Hosts: David Dobrik & Jason Nash
Date: April 14, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode of VIEWS is a wild blend of signature humor, candid behind-the-scenes stories, and a few surprisingly heartfelt moments. David, Jason, and Natalie (with Zane and a rotating cast of friends in the background) cover everything from Coachella FOMO and influencer party culture to the anxiety of hosting and the logistics of sperm donation. Of course, it all wraps up with an enthusiastic discussion about UFOs and alien conspiracies, true to David’s recent obsessions.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. David’s Beard & Hygiene Habits

[00:53–01:56]

• David sports a new beard, arguing, “Beards are so disgusting. Like every time I shower, I feel like I haven’t showered yet.”
• Claims he's never washed his face, causing shock for both Jason and Natalie.
  • Natalie: “Do you not wash your face?”
  • David: “No, I’ve never washed my face.”
• David’s Nonchalant Attitude towards Skincare: He only gets “like maybe one [zit] every quarter.”

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2. Coachella FOMO and Social Media Judgment

[01:56–08:15]

• David missed Coachella and experienced it through TikTok, feeling heavy FOMO.
  • David: “The first day was really bad.”
• Vents about being shamed for filming/dressing up at festivals:
  • “I am so fed up with that. I’m so over it... It’s 2026, yeah, everyone’s phone is out because they want to relive the memory.” (04:29)
  • Jason: “They’re posting themselves. They’re not going back, like, four years later being like, look what I did.” (05:08)
  • David: “Dude, fuck you. Because that’s so incorrect. I go back, I’m a vlogger… It’s so important to capture memories.” (05:17)
• Natalie and friends push back on the negativity:
  • “You for yucking people’s yum.” (06:14)

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3. Natalie’s Coachella Experience

[07:40–16:36]

• David asks if Natalie enjoyed freedom without him.
  • Natalie: “Oh, my God. Yeah, it was incredible. I just did whatever I wanted…” (07:58)
• The group laughs about Natalie, her sister, and Zane sharing a room—Zane drew the cot.
• Wildest moment: Natalie had to rescue her sister from an “influencer man” at a party.
  • Natalie: “She just thinks, like, the people that she finds, she’s like, did you see that person?” (14:46)
• On David’s party stamina versus the group:
  • Natalie: “Every minor inconvenience, David’s throwing a fit [...] Zane and I will just sit, we’ll drink to ourselves...having a great time.” (16:36)

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4. Movie Streaming & David’s Anxieties

[18:34–24:43]

• David spent the weekend watching old movies, including ‘Being John Malkovich’ and ‘Devil’s Advocate’.
  • “I should start recommending movies here for the pod listeners. Guys, watch Devil’s Advocate. [...] It just feels different. It doesn’t feel like the movies today.” (19:05)
• Jason is surprised David hadn't seen some classics.
• Discussion on how Star Wars doesn’t hold up (in their opinion):
  • David: “I don’t think Star Wars holds up.” (21:39)
  • Jason: “Star Wars is silly. Stormtroopers run, like, down the hallway…you have to suspend a lot of realism.” (22:09)

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5. David’s Social Anxiety in Groups

[22:49–24:43]

• David reveals he gets severe anxiety worrying if others are enjoying his movie picks or parties.
  • “All I’m doing is thinking about if they’re enjoying it or not. And I’ve realized this weekend, being away from everybody and watching movies on my own, how much I actually love watching movies again.” (22:49)

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6. Childhood Misconceptions: The Bubble Story

[24:53–26:01]

• David recounts how his mom taught him to wash hands, mistakenly thinking more soap bubbles meant dirtier hands.
  • “For the longest time, I always interpreted soap bubbles as dirtiness.” (25:24)

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7. Jason’s Fertility Clinic Story (The Famous "Coming Story")

[27:25–32:41]

• Jason hilariously describes going to a sperm specialist.
  • “It’s the most embarrassing. I know, I know.” (27:31)
• Details about the clinic:
  • “There’s a big flat screen that pulls out from the wall to watch [porn].”
  • David: “We’re just like animals.” (28:13)
• Jason ponders if he could bring Naveen in; he can’t.
• Awkwardness of the experience:
  • “I walked out and then four nurses are just staring. [...] It was just like, not fun.” (31:35)

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8. Conversation Turning to Parenthood

[32:41–36:01]

• Jason discusses maybe having another baby—David wants to be first to hear.
• Natalie can’t picture Jason with a toddler:
  • “It’s crazy.” (33:09)
• Jason says raising a child brings unexpected joy and purpose:
  • “It gives you the chance to share something with somebody you really, really love, which is really cool.” (36:28)
• Funny riff on people naming kids after family/friends:
  • David: “That and being asked to be a groomsman—I don’t get why it’s so emotional.”

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9. Smoothie Status Symbols and “The Erewhon Explanation”

[37:14–38:11]

• Jason shares a TikTok by a USC professor justifying $20 Erewhon smoothies:
  • “…for $20, you’re buying an entry point into, like, the 1% of the world.”
• David connects this thinking to festival and fashion shaming earlier in the episode.

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10. Alien Obsessions and Conspiracies

[38:31–46:33]

• David recaps Bob Lazar’s claims about secret alien spacecraft at Area 51, unearthing a passionate discussion.
  • “So Bob Lazar is this guy who used to work at Area 51…he basically said he was working on this spacecraft.” (38:35)
• Logan Paul’s alleged alien footage is discussed in detail.
  • “Logan…has alien footage that he bought off someone… It matched up with what Bob Lazar was describing. Bob watched Logan’s footage and was like, this is exactly what it was.” (39:01)
• Natalie, Jason, and David debate why aliens are always depicted as small and green, and why the US has kept these secrets.
• Bob Lazar’s testimony and Project Looking Glass (“the aliens have been visiting Earth for the last 10,000 years, and they’ve adapted the human’s DNA 54 times”) discussed with skepticism and awe.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I am so fed up with that... It’s 2026, like, everyone’s phone is out because they want to relive the memory...” (David, 04:29)
• “I have like one of the craziest stories that I can never share on the podcast with Xanax.” (David, 17:02)
• “The best part was the fact me, my sister, and Zane all shared a room.” (Natalie, 12:04)
• “There’s many times that we’ve been on a trip and [Natalie’s sister] will kick you out of your own room to fuck somebody. I think it’s really impressive.” (David, 15:28)
• “All I’m doing is thinking about if they’re enjoying it or not.” (David, 22:49 — on movie anxiety)
• “There’s a big flat screen that pulls out from the wall to watch [porn].” (Jay, 28:00)
• “For $20, you’re buying an entry point into the 1% of the world.” (Jay quoting a TikTok, 37:47)
• “There’s definitely aliens on this planet. I don’t know how we’ve kept it hidden.” (David, 39:12)

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Important Timestamps

• Beard/Hygiene Banter: [00:53–01:56]
• Coachella FOMO & Social Media: [01:56–08:15]
• Natalie’s Coachella Recap: [07:40–16:36]
• Movie Weekend & Star Wars Rant: [18:34–24:43]
• Host Anxiety & Parties: [22:49–24:43]
• Soap Bubble Childhood Story: [24:53–26:01]
• Jason’s Fertility Clinic Story: [27:25–32:41]
• Parenthood, Naming Kids & Validation: [32:41–36:01]
• Erewhon, Luxury, and Social Status: [37:14–38:11]
• Aliens/Bob Lazar UFO Theories: [38:31–46:33]

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Tone and Style

As always, the episode exudes sharp wit, infectious energy, and a mashup of sincerity and satire. The hosts are blunt, self-deprecating, and unfiltered, making even awkward or intimate topics hilarious and relatable.

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In Summary

This episode delivers the classic chaotic mix fans love: backstage influencer reality, goofy and honest personal stories (from festival escapades to sperm banks), neurotic party-host confessions, and a full-circle return to David's fascination with aliens and conspiracy. Whether you're in for the laughs, the subtle social commentary, or just unabashed internet drama, this VIEWS episode is a satisfying, highly entertaining ride.

Transcript

[Commercial Narrator]

You're never just one thing. You're the boss. Hey Google, when's my next meeting? The athlete that class wrecks me and their mom. Everyone in the all new Mazda CX. Five more to move every side of you. Learn [e-mail] Google is a trademark of Google LLC.

[Commercial Voice]

Sequences shortened and simulated.

[Natalie]

So you're saying with Hilton honors I can use points for a three night stay anywhere? Anywhere. What about fancy places like the canopy in Paris?

[Commercial Narrator]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

Hilton Honors, baby. Or relaxing sanctuaries like the Conrad in Tulum?

[Commercial Voice]

Hilton Honors, baby.

[Natalie]

What about the five star Waldorf Astoria in the Maldives? Are you going to do this for all 9,000 properties when you want points that can take you anywhere? Anytime it matters where you stay. Hilton for the stay, book your spring break now.

[David]

What's up guys? Welcome back to View. We are back with another podcast. I have a beard. You guys can't really hear it. You guys can't really see.

[Jay]

You definitely can't hear it.

[David]

They can't hear it. You hear this. If I rub it off, you probably could hear.

[Jay]

Let's hear your beard. Oh, that's nice.

[David]

Yeah. So currently have a beard. We'll be shaving soon. Natalie kind of likes it.

[Natalie]

I feel like you should just grow it out. Like you look like a different person.

[David]

It's really scary.

[Natalie]

It's not scary though.

[David]

Beards are so disgusting. Like every time I shower I feel like I haven't showered yet. I think you need to like shampoo your beard, right?

[Natalie]

Do you not wash your face?

[David]

No, I've never washed my face.

[Natalie]

Oh yeah, you should like put soap on it.

[David]

I never put soap on it.

[Natalie]

Who cares?

[Jay]

You put soap on you when you're in the shower. You wash your face, right? No, no, never. You sweat out your face. You don't take the soap and rub it all over?

[David]

God, no, never.

[Jay]

Really?

[David]

No. My water pressure is really high and

[Jay]

you don't get any zits.

[David]

I might shower like three or four times a day.

[Jay]

Does he get zits occasionally?

[Natalie]

Never. Like maybe one every quarter.

[David]

I get one every quarter.

[Jay]

Is this a sad beard?

[David]

No, this was like a. I was sick beard during Coachella, so I didn't shave and then I.

[Jay]

Someone was sad.

[Natalie]

They weren't a Coachella. Someone was depressed. Yeah, someone had fomo.

[David]

That was really bad the first day.

[Jay]

Were you watching everybody?

[David]

I was watching through TikTok, everything that was going on and like obviously on my feed, all I'm seeing is like Kylie, Kendall, all these, like, all these really famous people having fun and then when, like, when I would text Natalie, I'll be like, did you run into them? No, I'm not, like, running into them. Like, I don't know why you keep asking me. My perspective of Coachella was very different than what Natalie was experiencing, of course, because I was just. I was just consuming it through TikTok. So I was like, you're like a

[Jay]

mom, like, in Chicago, being, like, being like, oh, are you running into, you know, did you see Justin Bieber?

[David]

Because Natalie's friend. Can you say this? I thought so. Funny.

[Natalie]

What?

[David]

Natalie's friend's mom is trying to get, like, a birthday shout out.

[Natalie]

Oh, yeah.

[David]

For one of her, like, daughters.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

And she keeps asking Allie. She's like, is there any way you could reach out to Taylor Swift? It's my daughter's birthday. Like, it's a big deal. I just want her to say happy Birthday. And now he's like, that's not really how it works.

[Natalie]

Just reach out to Taylor.

[David]

You can't reach out to Taylor. And then she texted her again, what

[Natalie]

she said, because she saw that I was at Coachella and she was like, is there any chance, you know, anybody on Justin's team, Justin Bieber, that could give my friend a shout out for the birthday? The birthday is, like, in two weeks, so, like, hopefully the request will. Will end. But she just keeps naming the most famous people in the world.

[David]

It's really funny.

[Jay]

Shoot for the moon.

[David]

The most busy time that Justin Bieber has.

[Jay]

Two guys pulled up to my house today. They do. They trim trees in my neighborhood.

[David]

Oh, introduce me.

[Jay]

And they pulled out of the car and they're like, jason, they're like, we fucking gotta get these trees trimmed. We got it right here. And Freddie and. Fuck, I can't remember the other guys. Tony and I was like, I don't know, man. And he's could be like, let's go right now. He's like, we'll get him done. We want the video pod. It was so funny.

[David]

That's really funny. I actually. A lot of people DM me about the video pod the other way.

[Jay]

What'd they say?

[David]

They were like, don't listen to Jason. We don't need a video pod. It's better without it. Do you get those?

[Natalie]

Never once in my life come.

[Jay]

Never once.

[David]

Don't lie to me.

[Natalie]

I mean, I'm not saying that I have, like, people being like, every day being like, we need the video pod, but I'm not.

[Jay]

The.

[Natalie]

The flip side is definitely not how.

[Commercial Narrator]

Go.

[Jay]

Read the comments. The comments are all for the video.

[David]

Really?

[Jay]

Yeah. Those are just people trying to get in good with you. Yeah, I think.

[David]

Okay. Also, this is what pissed me off about Coachella. Huh?

[Natalie]

Do tell.

[David]

Well, okay, so people are always saying, don't. Like, people don't go to Coachella to even listen to music anymore. They just go to take Instagram pictures. Yeah. And so what? Like, I am so fed up with that. I am so fed up with that. I'm so over it. I'm over, like, the. I'm over the comments of people saying, everyone's phone is out. No one's having fun. Go fuck yourself. Like, it's 2026. Like, yeah, everyone's phone is out because they want to relive the memory again later. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity for a lot of people to go to Coachella. I'm sorry. They're fucking recording it. I'm. I fucking hate it. I hate that people are ashamed for dressing up.

[Jay]

Well, they're not really. I don't think they're reliving the memory. They're posting themselves. They're not going back, like, four years later being like, look what I did.

[David]

Yeah, Jay, People do that. Nah, J, I. Dude, fuck you. Because that's so incorrect. I go back, I'm a vlogger and I go back to videos of fireworks

[Friend/Guest]

I have in my phone to look at fireworks.

[David]

Like, I actually like looking at that shit. Should. I would never even post. I just like looking back at it. It's so important to, like, capture memories,

[Jay]

is that I don't care. People want to post stuff. That's great.

[David]

I'm just saying, in fucking 30, 40 years, you're going to be fucking looking back at videos of people on their phones and you're going to be like, remember when everyone used to leave the house?

[Friend/Guest]

Like, because we're gonna be all surrounded by AI. We're never gonna have to be hooked up to machines.

[David]

So stop bitching and complaining.

[Jay]

Who is bitching?

[Friend/Guest]

So it's all I see on my feed.

[Jay]

It's just like tr.

[David]

Like, and, like, shaming people for dressing up when they're going to Coachella.

[Friend/Guest]

And it's like, it's cooler to just,

[David]

like, go more casually dress up.

[Natalie]

My for you page is totally different. Everyone's just, like, gassing each other up on their outfits and their content.

[David]

Well, I think I get so pissed

[Friend/Guest]

at the people that talk that I'm just like, you. Yeah, you for yucking people's yum.

[Jay]

I agree with that.

[Friend/Guest]

I get so mad and.

[David]

And yeah, genuinely. Okay, so just another video of people in Italy.

[Friend/Guest]

They were dancing.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Friend/Guest]

It was like a guy on the street guitaring or whatever. And it was like. You know that song?

[Jay]

No, but it's the main Italian song. Okay, okay, okay. I don't know if he's doing it right now.

[David]

It's when you're eating gelato in the middle of the night. The guy comes out the guitar and he starts playing it. Everybody.

[Friend/Guest]

It happens in Italy, everywhere. I guess seeing a squirrel there.

[David]

No, it's not.

[Friend/Guest]

It's rare.

[David]

Everybody. Everybody's filming it. And everyone's phones are out and all

[Friend/Guest]

the comments are like, wow. People can't just live in the moment. It fucking pisses me off so much. It's like they're having a good time

[David]

and they're filming it. I don't know why. I don't know if this is.

[Friend/Guest]

I'm just angry because I'm like, I do social media, but that's not how I'm looking at this at all. I just like, who gives a fuck? Who gives a fuck that people are filming it?

[Jay]

Right.

[Friend/Guest]

It makes me so mad. Not everyone's going to be in Italy having gelato and listening to that fucking Italian song every day of their lives. They can just live in the moment because that moment is fucking $8,000 moment

[David]

for them that they.

[Friend/Guest]

That they saved all year for.

[David]

I don't know.

[Friend/Guest]

I'm just, like, so fed up with the put your phone away culture. That's it.

[Jay]

What else pissed you off about Coachella this year?

[David]

That was kind of it.

[Natalie]

Natalie went without me.

[Jay]

No, I was not having David to attend to.

[Natalie]

It's so funny, the amount of people that, like, not obviously people in my DMs, but just people at, like, our friends at the festival that were like a David free weekend. Must be nice.

[David]

And I was like, did you feel freedom?

[Natalie]

Oh, my God. Yeah, it was incredible. I didn't have to, like, I literally just did whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I went to whatever party I wanted to go to. I got ready at the time I wanted to.

[Jay]

But did you miss him at points?

[David]

No.

[Natalie]

No. That wasn't like a scenario where I'd miss him.

[David]

You know what's crazy is, like, I'm so delusional.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

That, like, I hear her say that

[Friend/Guest]

and I 100% believe her.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

But when I. When I watch and, like, when I'm seeing, I'm like, she's probably so bored without me.

[Natalie]

Like, that's funny.

[Friend/Guest]

Like, I get it.

[David]

I get where she's coming from, but I'm like, just like. And Natalie's like, when she. When I'm watching her do, like, the girl time. Yeah. I'm not buying it.

[Natalie]

What girl time?

[David]

Like, when you're just, like, hanging out with the girls and, like, being a girl, I'm like, this isn't Natalie.

[Natalie]

Because I. Because I. Because I don't really have the capacity to do that when. Because you take up so much of my time, you. I don't have the time to do girl time. No, no, no, you're not there.

[David]

No. There's a plethora of reasons why that. That makes sense, why I perceive it that way. But, like, when I see Natalie hanging out with the girls, I'm like, that's not her. She needs to be with the dudes. Like, it's just like, I. For some reason, I can't, like, really wrap my head around it.

[Jay]

I discovered something so obvious that I couldn't believe, but it. On YouTube, and it was the best. I couldn't believe the feed. I was like, what?

[David]

Wait, what?

[Jay]

I just didn't realize that Coachella was, like, on YouTube.

[David]

Oh, you could.

[Jay]

You could switch stages.

[Natalie]

Yes, you could.

[Jay]

I. I couldn't believe. And if I was. I watched the Strokes, my favorite band. I was so happy. And then I. And then when it ended, I didn't have to run out of there and find a car or be lost. It was so good, and it sounded good, and Bieber sounded great.

[David]

I don't think it's. Any of it sounded good. That was my problem.

[Natalie]

Oh, the Strokes, I thought, was actually one of my favorite performances of the weekend.

[Jay]

They sounded.

[David]

Weren't you there?

[Jay]

Strokes sound so good.

[David]

Yeah, but I'm just. I'm saying through the stream. I'm saying through the stream. Like, things just, like, felt really too quiet. I feel like I wasn't getting, like, the.

[Natalie]

Yeah. But the way they do the cuts and things, like, you can actually see.

[Jay]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[David]

Like, it was.

[Natalie]

Yeah. I can't really ever. Like, I have the artist pass, but I can never really see the performer.

[Jay]

Right.

[Natalie]

You know, like, I'm off to the side, like, right in this weird area. Granted, I'm really close, but, like, I can't really see anything. It's always better to be back in the.

[David]

There were rumors this year that the artist section would finally have, like, a bar. Yeah.

[Natalie]

Oh, yeah.

[David]

And it's not.

[Natalie]

They did have a bar.

[David]

Oh.

[Natalie]

But it wasn't really in the artist section. It was like you had to go walk all the Way over to this other area. It was like really far back and hidden.

[David]

I wonder what the logic is behind that. Like, no, like the past years, they don't have a bar in the artist section, so everyone just hangs out in vip, cuz that's where you get. But I think it's cuz they don't. I don't know, they don't want people clocking up the artist section.

[Natalie]

Yeah, that's kind of what. I don't know.

[David]

What was the best part of the Coachella experience?

[Natalie]

Honestly, so.

[David]

Oh, she stayed at the old Fanjoy house. How crazy is that?

[Natalie]

Yeah, the house we stayed at when we went with Fanjoy.

[Jay]

Really?

[David]

Yeah. Like, what was it? 2019 with the Ugly Squad. 2019 merch. That I thought was so cool.

[Natalie]

I thought it was so. I mean, I made it. I thought it was.

[Jay]

So you thought it was cool and then you changed your mind about it?

[David]

People just said it was ugly.

[Natalie]

Yeah, people hated the neon. Like, in hindsight, it is pretty ugly. Like, who wants Vlog Squad big and neon? Like across their chest on a hoodie and down their pant leg?

[David]

I thought. I thought it was so. I thought those bubble letters were so cool.

[Natalie]

I mean, hey, the numbers don't lie. It's still sold. Okay.

[David]

Yeah. It was a different time, though. That wasn't because of your incredible creative direction.

[Jay]

Okay, well, I jerked off in a cup today.

[Natalie]

What?

[Friend/Guest]

What?

[David]

Jay, what kind of a pivot is that?

[Natalie]

We're also like, still talking.

[David]

Oh, sorry, Jay. What the fuck was that?

[Natalie]

You always do that.

[Jay]

It's a pretty traumatic experience.

[David]

No, I understand, but you just asked me a question.

[Natalie]

I haven't even answered it yet.

[David]

That's an incredible topic. But like, when you have a Gaga.

[Jay]

What was your. Yeah, what was your favorite Coachella moment?

[David]

It's hard to pivot out of that right now. Dude, you can't just be like a jerked off in a cup and then you go back to Natalie's Coachella experience.

[Jay]

Well, we're teasing it. We'll tease it.

[David]

Okay.

[Jay]

It's just the way I teased it this morning. Okay, here we go.

[David]

That's really gross. That's really gross.

[Natalie]

The best part I'm was the fact me, my sister, and Zane all shared a room.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

So we thought like the sleeping arrangement, like the. The person that like, organ. The landlord or whatever of the house told. Told us that there was like two beds in each room, but they were including, like our room was a king bed and there was a pullout cot.

[Jay]

Okay.

[Natalie]

They were counting that as Like a double bedroom. Like two beds.

[Jay]

Sure.

[David]

So you had Zayn sleep on the cot.

[Natalie]

So Zane slept on the cot all weekend.

[David]

Dude, that's so.

[Natalie]

Oh my God. It was so.

[Jay]

How did he do?

[Natalie]

He was fine. I mean he would just like. We. He was, he didn't care.

[David]

What time were you guys going to

[Natalie]

bed the first night? We didn't go to bed till like 6:30 in the morning.

[David]

Oh yeah. That fucking sucks.

[Jay]

It does.

[Natalie]

Yeah. But we were so drunk that when we came home it didn't matter. We all just passed out.

[David]

You know, fuck, 6:30 in the morning. That's just like not what's going on.

[Natalie]

At 5am we were at a house party and they put like.

[David]

Was that when you went to guest?

[Natalie]

Yeah, we were. Yeah, we were at the guest party that was on Friday night.

[David]

Guess Guest compound has the best parties.

[Natalie]

It was really fun at Coachella.

[David]

Like if I.

[Jay]

There's.

[David]

There was this guy that posted like a, like a story that was like if you need tickets to the guest compound or if you need tickets to all these parties, hit me up. And every party like Neon was priced at like 500. And then, and then like the revolve festivals price like $300 for a ticket and then they put guest compound at $3,000. It's like the highest tier part.

[Natalie]

No way.

[David]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

Wow.

[David]

It's just this random like promoter that did it. It really is like a really, really kick ass party. Yeah.

[Natalie]

Because it's so intimate. Like it's at a house.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

But they decorate it like really nicely and like they, they curate the like group of people. Like it's very like, like you're rubbing shoulders with some like crazy A list people.

[David]

It's, it's, it's very LA Field trip to Coachella.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[David]

Yeah, it's LA in the desert.

[Jay]

Is it four houses that you can go to or one?

[David]

No, it's one house.

[Jay]

It's one house.

[Natalie]

It's one house. Like there's. They own like they have 15 houses all together in this cul de sac. But there's only one that's the party house. I know it's but so that was really fun. But yeah, we were there total like.

[David]

Have you ever gone with us? Did you ever do guests at the compound?

[Jay]

I've been to the guest compound.

[David]

Oh, right, right, right, right.

[Commercial Narrator]

Yeah.

[Jay]

I don't think I stayed there or maybe I did.

[Natalie]

But yeah, we were there till like six and I remember Zane and I kind of like split up at the end of the, at the end of the evening there, and I saw it was like 6am My sister was talking to some other influencer man who shall not be named. Where I had to barge in and be like, this is not happen.

[David]

Oh, wow. And.

[Natalie]

And he was like, what? She's a free woman. She can do whatever she wants. And I was like, not with you.

[David]

You're such a. Natalie gets so fucking jealous.

[Natalie]

Oh. Because my sister doesn't know any better. She just, like. She just thinks, like, the people that she finds, she's like, did you see that person?

[David]

It'll be like, she's not marrying the guy. She just wants to either flirt or the kiss or hook up, whatever.

[Natalie]

No, they were flirting. But she does not need to hook up with this man. It's not cute.

[Jay]

Is your sister get mad at you for overstepping like that?

[Natalie]

No, no, she was like. He was. She was like, fine with it. She wasn't, like, into her.

[David]

Did you hook up with anybody?

[Jay]

No.

[David]

Fucking knew it. What about Zane?

[Natalie]

No.

[David]

Really? Oh. Cause you had the room situation.

[Natalie]

Yeah. I mean, it was not even possible.

[David]

Does your sister hook up with someone?

[Jay]

No.

[David]

Oh, Your sister always finds a way, whether it's kicking you guys out of the room.

[Natalie]

She would kick me out.

[David]

That's the craziest part about Natalie's sister.

[Natalie]

What?

[David]

Well, is that she'll. There's many times that we've been on a trip and she'll kick you out of your own room to fuck somebody. I think it's really impressive. I think it's really, really impressive.

[Natalie]

It's pretty crazy.

[David]

And then you get. And you're like, there's like so many emotions because you're like, first of all, I paid for this room. And then second of all, I could tell you're jealous that she's fucking someone. And 30% of the people that she is fucking are people that you were trying to get with.

[Jay]

Yeah, that.

[Natalie]

Well, that's the problem.

[David]

So there's like a lot of emotions that are going on.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[David]

Yeah. Okay. What else?

[Natalie]

I mean, it wasn't really that eventful, to be honest. It was my most chill, laid back coachella.

[Jay]

Oh, till 6:30.

[David]

Well, it's because I wasn't there.

[Natalie]

Yeah, probably because you weren't there. Because every, like, minor inconvenience, David's throwing a fit, you know, and then I gotta fucking deal with it. I gotta figure out where we're going. We go. If, like, let's say we go into a party, like one of the parties we went to, it probably. It didn't really get fun until like an hour in. But if David was there and it was like the first 20 minutes and he like wasn't seeing like his friends or having fun or whatever, he'd be like, we gotta fucking go. We gotta go to the next one. Where's the next one?

[Jay]

We gotta go to the other.

[Natalie]

We gotta go across the desert.

[David]

That's true. That's true. I need to. Yeah, that's true. If it's not fun, I need to leave.

[Natalie]

Zane and I will just sit, we'll drink to ourselves until we find our friends and then we're there for five fucking hours having a great time.

[Jay]

That's the way to do it.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[Jay]

Have a little.

[David]

You made that actually sound kind of cool. Well, I would be down to sit

[Natalie]

with you guys and you would be down. But like you like.

[David]

I need a pack of cigarettes.

[Natalie]

No, you know what you need is a Xanax. That's what you need. You need to take a chill pill every once in a while.

[David]

I don't like Xanax.

[Natalie]

Okay.

[Jay]

Have you ever had Xanax?

[David]

Yeah.

[Jay]

What it do to you?

[David]

Oh my God. I have like one of the craziest stories that I can never share on. On the podcast with Xanax.

[Jay]

Really?

[David]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jay]

Oh gosh.

[David]

Xanax.

[Natalie]

Are you sure it was Xanax? It doesn't sound right.

[Jay]

Well, it was Xanax and it's just so chill though.

[David]

I drank on it.

[Jay]

What does that do?

[David]

It knocks you out.

[Natalie]

You're not supposed to do that.

[David]

And then I. And then I woke up to the craziest experience of my entire life.

[Jay]

And Natalie was all over you?

[Friend/Guest]

Damn near.

[Jay]

Really?

[Natalie]

I was fingering him.

[Jay]

Reggie was all over you?

[David]

Reggie and John were double teaming me.

[Friend/Guest]

Oh my God.

[Commercial Narrator]

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[Commercial Voice]

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[David]

Well, I'm pretty bummed I didn't go, but I'm glad that you got a little time away from me.

[Natalie]

Yeah, me too.

[Jay]

What did you do all weekend while you were.

[David]

I watched.

[Jay]

I got the funniest text from you.

[David]

Like, eight to 10 movies, I think he texted me.

[Jay]

He's like, have you seen Being John Malkovich? Yeah. First he texted me, you see Being John Malkovich? I go, oh, yeah, great movie. Then he goes, have you seen Devil's Advocate? And then when you send that one, I was like, oh, man. He's really struggling for finding something. He went back to 1999.

[Friend/Guest]

Wait.

[David]

Devil's Advocate was amazing.

[Jay]

You liked it?

[David]

Yeah, I watched.

[Jay]

I don't think I've ever seen it.

[David]

Oh, you should, but it's not a

[Jay]

movie that, like, it's.

[David]

I recommend to the pod. I should start recommending movies here for the POD listeners. Guys, watch Devil's Advocate. I think it's just like. It just feels different. It doesn't feel like the movies today. I really like it. It's Al Pacino. Keanu Reeves.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

Big fucking Al Pacino. I never. I've never seen a single movie.

[Jay]

It's funny. Like, if someone was going to go watch an Al Pacino movie, they wouldn't pick Devil's Advocate. That would be like a pass. You'd go watch, like, Dog Day Afternoon, or you'd watch the Godfather or Scent of a Woman.

[David]

See the Scarface guy. Or.

[Jay]

No. Yeah, you'd watch Scarface.

[David]

Wait, so he's in Godfather and Scarface?

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

You gotta be kidding me.

[Jay]

Yeah, he's great.

[David]

That's why this guy's such a big deal.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

He is so captivating on screen.

[Jay]

Oh, yeah? You think so?

[David]

I have never seen anything like it.

[Jay]

That's awesome.

[David]

And he was so old, too. I think he must have been in his, like, 60s in this movie. 70s. 60s.

[Jay]

No, no, he's probably like his 50s,

[David]

but I think people. Yeah, you're right. You're right.

[Friend/Guest]

You're right.

[Jay]

So 1999, 24 years ago. He's probably 80 now.

[David]

So charming.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

So charming. I loved it. That's it. It's not like the greatest movie of all time, but.

[Jay]

Right.

[David]

It's a very interesting movie.

[Jay]

It's like, he's in it, so it's good.

[David]

Yeah. And Keanu Reeves. Keanu Reeves is actually really good in it.

[Jay]

Yeah, we saw. We saw that movie, the drama with Pat, Robert Pattinson and Zendaya.

[Natalie]

Oh, how was it?

[Jay]

It was fine. It was good.

[Natalie]

No, I love Robert Pattinson.

[David]

Pattinson?

[Jay]

Yeah. There's a lot of girls there to see Robert Pattinson.

[Natalie]

Oh, he's me.

[David]

I also watched how to Train youn Dragon for the first time.

[Jay]

Oh, I love that. I saw that with my kids.

[David]

I could never. I never got into it. I would just put it on because I was trying to get Natalie to stay in my room longer.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

Natalie came back from Coachella. She's like. And I was. And I, like, saw her on the security cameras coming in. I was like, where do you think you're going?

[Natalie]

As I came in with my bags at the front door, and I was just, like, gonna go to the bathroom or something. And then I was gonna leave to go to my own home. Sure. And I get a text from him as I'm walking out the door. Where do you think you're going?

[Jay]

Is this. Is this Monday or Sunday night?

[Natalie]

Sunday.

[Jay]

Sunday. Came back Sunday.

[David]

Like, Sunday midday.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[David]

And then she comes in, she gives me the tea about Coachella, and then she's, like, leaving, and I'm like, oh, really? Because I'm about to watch how to Train youn Dragon. And then she goes, fuck you. And then she sits down, orders Chili's and watches it.

[Jay]

Oh, that's so nice.

[David]

It's really hard for her.

[Jay]

You guys were brought back together.

[David]

We also finished Lord of the Rings.

[Jay]

Okay.

[David]

It's really nice. I'm re. Watching all the trilogies, all the franchises, and I think I'm gonna start a letterboxd. Letterboxd?

[Natalie]

Really? You should. You start reviewing things.

[Friend/Guest]

Yeah.

[David]

I feel like I have a pretty interesting perspective on movies.

[Jay]

What's your take?

[David]

I.

[Jay]

What's your letterbox gonna be like?

[David]

This is gonna be the hottest take of all time. I think I've said this. I don't think Star wars holds up.

[Jay]

The first one.

[David]

All of them.

[Jay]

Oh, yeah. Star wars is. Yeah, I agree.

[David]

Really?

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

It's like.

[Jay]

It's like when you're 10 years old,

[David]

I think people like it because. Because it's Star Wars.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

Don't think. I don't think it holds up.

[Jay]

It's kind of silly.

[David]

Harry Potter to me, holds up even more. It's incredible.

[Jay]

Well, Star wars is silly. Like Stormtroopers. Like, Stormtroopers run, like, down the hallway, and they, like, shoot them, and then they're not. They kind of just die, but they don't die.

[David]

You have to suspend a lot of, like.

[Jay]

Yes.

[David]

Realism in it.

[Jay]

Yes.

[David]

It's very play like.

[Jay]

Yes.

[David]

Like it's like, it's very. It's shot kind of goofy.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

I don't know how to explain it. And you have to, like, really suspend the fact that Yoda's a puppet. And like, it's very. There's a lot. Do you know, I mean, that you're like the biggest Star wars fan. Do you understand what I'm saying? It was my favorite as a kid. So I'm confused why. I, like, I also. I also found this out. Natalie says we have to explore this. I get really bad anxiety when, like, when watching movies with people.

[Jay]

Right.

[David]

Because all I'm doing is thinking about if they're enjoying it or not. And I've realized this weekend, being away from everybody and watching movies on my own, how much I actually love watching movies again. But I just. I don't like watching it with people because all I'm thinking about is, are they liking this or are they annoyed that I chose this movie? Like, are they liking this? Like, are they paying attention? Why is Natalie on her phone? That's all I think about. And it, like, consumes my entire movie experience.

[Natalie]

That's anxiety, right? Like, that's as if he has those. He has that experience. And not just in movie watching scenarios, but, like, in every scenario. Like when we go to events or like, we go. Or we, I don't know, go to the grocery store, like, or. Yeah.

[Jay]

When you throw a party. Are you worried people.

[Natalie]

Oh, my God. Parties?

[David]

Yes. Yes, yes. Yeah. Yeah.

[Jay]

You're worried people aren't having a good time at your parties.

[David]

Well, that's all.

[Jay]

Even for a second.

[David]

The party.

[Jay]

You think that I've never been to a bad party here ever.

[David]

Well, wait, wait, wait. That's. That's the only reason I have a party, is for other people.

[Jay]

No, I get it, but you should drop that. Like, your parties are so fun.

[Natalie]

Yeah. But, like, once the party's happening.

[David]

There was. There was one time we had a party here and the dance floor wasn't lighting up. When was that? My birthday or Halloween. And I hid in John's room so no one could find me. And I was like, I'm not coming out till the dance floor is fixed. I am straight up bridezilla.

[Friend/Guest]

I just can't.

[David]

I, like, don't want to put anything bad on.

[Jay]

Sure.

[David]

I hold my parties to the same standard I hold my vlogs to.

[Jay]

Right.

[David]

Not as much, but, like, I do want, because people are experiencing a real time with me, so I want to make sure it's really good.

[Natalie]

Are they. If you're hiding in John's room.

[David]

No, but it's my home. Like, they're here. Like, I want to make sure, you know? Yeah. I never thought I would be the type of person that's, like, when someone comes over, I'm like, yelling at my roommates, like, we gotta clean. We gotta clean. Everybody clean up. But that's who I am. I'm like, someone's coming here into our home. Like, we gotta make it look nice.

[Jay]

Like my mom. Yeah.

[David]

Yeah. My parents would always make me look, like, do that. Like, if, like, a relative came by. I'm like, what the fuck? Who cares what my aunt thinks?

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[Jay]

I was also thinking, turning into your

[David]

mother, have you thought about things that, like, you got incredibly wrong as a kid? Like, I was just thinking about this thing. My mom. I think there was, like, a moment where I didn't wash my hands before a meal, so my mom took me into the bathroom personally, and she was like, look how dirty your hands are. And she started washing my hands, like, behind me. Like, you know when you're teaching someone how to golf swing? That's how she's washing my hands. And she's pointing to the soap bubbles that were in the. In the water, like, coming off.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[David]

And it's just soap. But she was like, you see these bubbles? Like, that means how dirty your hands are. And for some reason, like, the more

[Natalie]

bubbles, the dirtier you are.

[David]

Correct. And for some. I don't even know if that's what she was trying to say, but that's how I interpreted it. And for the longest time, I've. I always interpreted soap bubbles as dirtiness. And it was, like, the craziest thing. And I think that's where I, like, built this, like, crazy phobia of, like, washing your hands and showering and being clean. And there's something I completely got wrong as a kid. Like, just, like, misunderstood what my mom was saying.

[Jay]

Yeah. Dirt doesn't create bubbles.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[Jay]

No, no.

[David]

It has nothing to do with it.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Friend/Guest]

She may have also pointed to one bubble that had actual dir.

[David]

Dirt in it or something.

[Friend/Guest]

And I took it as all the bubbles. Like, I definitely, like, from premieres April 19 on MGM. In a small, inescapable town, understanding the monsters may be the only way out.

[Chevy Commercial Voice]

Desperate hope may lead residents toward even darker truths.

[David]

I think they're doing it to make us afraid.

[Natalie]

Well, then it worked.

[Friend/Guest]

Something ancient is feeding off of their suffering. And it. It won't stop.

[David]

Survival will demand impossible choices.

[Friend/Guest]

From season four premieres April 19th on MGM.

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[Friend/Guest]

Fuck that up.

[David]

All right, Jay, I think it's time to go to your coming story. I think the audience has waited long enough.

[Jay]

So I went to a sperm specialist today, like a fertility clinic, to, like, test my sperm. And it's the most embarrassing. I know, I know.

[David]

Well, I'm just thinking about him touching his own. His meat.

[Jay]

Yeah. And did you know they have, like, full porn in there?

[David]

Yes.

[Jay]

On a big screen. How do you know?

[Friend/Guest]

Oh, I didn't know this. Sorry.

[David]

I'm talking like, I saw this in a movie.

[Friend/Guest]

I saw Ted.

[Jay]

I was shocked.

[Friend/Guest]

Wait, wait. It's on a screen.

[Natalie]

Wait, what do you mean?

[Jay]

It's on a big. There's a laptop where you can control it, and then there's a big flat screen that pulls out from the wall to watch.

[Natalie]

Damn.

[Jay]

Like an iPad. There's, like, an iPad to control it. Huh?

[Friend/Guest]

That's insane.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

We're just like animals.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

It was so, like, we're literally animals.

[Jay]

It was such a funny thing. It was like.

[Friend/Guest]

So you go into your.

[David]

You go to the clinic?

[Jay]

Yep.

[David]

Walk me through it.

[Jay]

Yeah. You go to the clinic. You walk in first. You walk in, you're like, fuck, there's all kinds of guys here. Fucking losers like me.

[David]

Why are you going in there? Just to see if you can have a baby.

[Jay]

Yeah. Just to see if, like. Remember when we did the sperm race?

[David]

Yes.

[Jay]

Remember when my sperm went the other way?

[David]

Yes.

[Jay]

So that's, like, a problem.

[Natalie]

Oh, really?

[Jay]

Interesting. Because it's, like going. It's up. It's going the wrong way.

[David]

Okay. Interesting, interesting.

[Natalie]

So we Said that sperm race is what made you think, oh, I should go get this tested. Like, it was from that.

[David]

Yeah. Why are you going to get your sperm tested?

[Jay]

Why am I going to possibly have a baby? You know?

[David]

Wow.

[Jay]

So to see if there's, like, vitamins that I need to take to turn the mobility around or, like, you're having another baby. I don't know. Not yet, but.

[David]

Okay. If it happens, you come. Please tell me first.

[Jay]

We'll see. We'll see.

[David]

Jason, please, I want to be there for when you tell everybody.

[Jay]

Okay. Okay. Okay. Actually, I did promise that to you.

[David]

I want to be sitting there holding your hand with Naveen and being like, we want some news.

[Jay]

Yeah. Is Naveen having a good time?

[David]

Is Naveen having a good time?

[Jay]

So, yes. Anyways, we went in.

[David]

That's my moment, you being pregnant, so don't take that again.

[Jay]

Great. So you'll watch the baby?

[David]

Yeah, I'll have, like, Taylor watch it.

[Jay]

So. Yeah. Anyways, you go in and it's just really hard. It's just really embarrassing. Like, there's people talking outside and you just have to, like, do it.

[David]

How far is the room from the lobby? It's like, down a hallway.

[Jay]

The room is far from the lobby, but the nurses are right outside the door, like, talking about the weekend, you know, like. Oh, yeah, I know. I did that. Okay. Yeah, for sure. Well, okay. And I'll see you tomorrow.

[David]

So how I used to see these things is that the porn would be in the magazines, which I think is disgusting.

[Jay]

Right?

[David]

Because then it's like, everyone's holding this magazine while they're.

[Jay]

The whole thing's disgusting. I had to pay and give my credit card. Like, the whole thing is.

[David]

Are you sitting down or laying?

[Jay]

There's a chair and then there's a. Not a diaper, but like a.

[Friend/Guest]

A.

[Jay]

What do you call? Like a pad on the chair. It's like a disposable pad. Like a baby. You know what I mean? Like, okay, so you sit on that and then there's lubricant, tears. There's all kinds of porn. And when you turn genre, what is it?

[Natalie]

Like pornhub.com or is it. They have preloaded videos.

[Jay]

It was a. It was a. It was a. It was a website that I'd never seen before.

[David]

Oh. But then when I turned in there, they. What, they have exclusive stuff in there?

[Jay]

Yeah. Also everything was long movies, which was so funny because I was like, who's sitting around for an hour and a half?

[David]

It's like classic porn. Like stuff you'd find on vhs. Oh, that's sick. You could get addicted to this place.

[Jay]

Yeah. I mean, you could be in there for an hour.

[David]

Keep coming back.

[Jay]

Yeah. Watch a trilogy. And then the other thing is, is when I turned it on, it's so loud. So it's like. And then.

[Natalie]

That's great.

[Jay]

And then I couldn't turn it off, so I was like, oh, fuck, fuck, fuck. I was like trying to turned the sound off.

[David]

Are you allowed to go in there with your significant other?

[Jay]

I. I don't know. I don't think so. Naveen sat in the lobby and. And then I came out.

[David]

Nabi said, the lobby.

[Jay]

I came out and I was like. Then they were like, it's gotta, like, you have to write the exact time. And you write it on the chart. Then you write it also on the cup. And then I'm writing it on the cup and I'm like, I can't fucking see because I'm so old. I'm like trying to fill in the lines. Then I walked out and then four. Four nurses are just like staring. Ones that weren't working with me. They're just like, like staring at me. And I'm like, ugh. And then I thought I heard them say something when I walked by. It was just like, not fun.

[David]

Okay. Yeah, that does. That sounds a little scary.

[Jay]

I mean, would you want to go do that?

[David]

No.

[Jay]

Do you think you could go perform?

[David]

No. Fuck no. I already can't perform at the worst.

[Jay]

I mean, I had no problem, but.

[David]

Oh, okay.

[Jay]

But no, I'm just kidding. But yeah. So that was my day.

[Friend/Guest]

Damn. That was today.

[Jay]

Today? Yeah.

[David]

Wow. How long did it take you to finish the process?

[Jay]

I didn't really rush myself, but maybe like two minutes.

[David]

Okay, so let's. Oh, that's great.

[Jay]

That wasn't Visa. She's like. She's like, even if you're done, she's like, stay in there for a while.

[David]

Just so you don't look like a loser.

[Natalie]

Yeah, that's so funny.

[David]

Wait, can we unpack this kid thing or no?

[Jay]

Yeah, you can.

[David]

I mean, I don't have too many questions. I'm just like. I feel like the audience is going to be like, have you said this before on the pod?

[Natalie]

Yeah, they've talked about it.

[Jay]

So.

[David]

Okay. Yeah. You know, are you ready for it?

[Natalie]

I mean.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

I mean, it's going to be a different.

[Jay]

I mean, I don't think it's going to be that hard.

[Natalie]

I can't picture you with, like a toddler. Like, I know you have kids, but you with like a newborn or like a toddler. It's crazy.

[David]

That's gonna be so fucking funny.

[Jay]

Naveen will take care of him.

[David]

What are you gonna. You keep telling yourself that, Jay. You're there every day.

[Jay]

No, you don't take care of him. I don't have to do anything. I just won't. I just can't. She's already. She's already said that I'll do some stuff.

[David]

What would you do?

[Jay]

Like, you know, kick him around.

[David]

Do you have a name?

[Natalie]

Drive him?

[Jay]

Yeah, but I don't want to say.

[David]

Oh, it's good. Oh, you're saving it to record my reaction when it's named after me?

[Jay]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's. It's.

[David]

His name's David. I always think that's so. I always think that's so funny. Like, you know when someone's named after somebody? Have you seen those videos? Like, the parents will bring in. The parents are holding the baby and the grandparents there, and the parents are like, you know what his name is? And they're like, it's Enrique Lopez and it's named after the grandparent.

[Jay]

Right.

[David]

And the grandparents are crying. I never understood that.

[Jay]

Right?

[David]

That and being asked to be a groomsman.

[Friend/Guest]

I don't get.

[David]

I don't get why it's so emotional. I know you're supposed to be emotional. Yeah. And I know you're supposed to go, yes. Oh my God, I can't believe this happened. But I'm just like, why?

[Friend/Guest]

Who cares?

[David]

Like, grooms. Groomsman is like, okay, so to show

[Friend/Guest]

up earlier, it's a task.

[Jay]

If you asked me to be your groomsman, I'd be honored.

[Friend/Guest]

And then if you named the kid after me, like, I would.

[Natalie]

Well, because it's recognizing like, like you are for the groomsman or the bridesmaid. It's. It's recognizing like, oh, I can only choose five, six people, whatever it is. And you're one of those most important people in my life.

[Friend/Guest]

I just don't like.

[Natalie]

It's just the acknowledgement.

[Friend/Guest]

I don't need that kind of validation from my friend.

[Jay]

Sense.

[Natalie]

No, you don't, because you're just so amazing.

[Friend/Guest]

No, that's okay. Why you gotta turn?

[Jay]

Well, you get. I'll be nice. I'll be nicer than Natalie. You get a lot of validation in other ways.

[Natalie]

Yeah.

[Jay]

So for somebody that maybe doesn't get the kind of validation you get on a day to day basis, like, oh, this is like fucking really cool. Like, it's really Exciting. Maybe that's why.

[David]

And then.

[Natalie]

Okay, passport.

[David]

And then.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Friend/Guest]

And then I guess being named at, like. If you told me his name's David,

[Jay]

he'd be like, weirdo. Like, what a freak.

[Friend/Guest]

I would be like, I would be excited because I know that's. That'd be so weird, because I know that's, like, the human thing to do, to be excited, but I wouldn't, like. I don't know. I'd be like, yeah, David's a good name.

[Jay]

Okay. Imagine.

[Friend/Guest]

Or that's weird.

[Jay]

Imagine you had a daughter and you fucking love this daughter so much, and then she has a daughter, and they're like, yeah, we're gonna call him, like, David. You're gonna call him Julian or David? Julian.

[Friend/Guest]

Maybe it'll mean more. It'll mean more when I go through my life.

[Jay]

Kids change everything. It changes your entire perspective. Yeah. Maybe I don't become a different person.

[David]

Okay.

[Jay]

Completely different.

[Friend/Guest]

I guess I must not have that in me.

[Jay]

You. You do. You will.

[Friend/Guest]

What are you most.

[Jay]

You'll be. Oh, my God. You'll be the biggest. You'll be the biggest, like, softy.

[Friend/Guest]

No.

[Jay]

Oh, my God. You'll do the biggest 180. You'll be like. You'll be decorating the room.

[David]

Oh, no. For that.

[Friend/Guest]

I love that shit.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Friend/Guest]

So excited to have a kid.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Friend/Guest]

I'm just saying those. The particular moment of naming a kid after somebody, I don't. I never really understood.

[Jay]

Right.

[Friend/Guest]

What are you. There has to be, like. What's, like, the most exciting thing that you're excited about? Possibly having a kid. Like, what's the most exciting thing that you're like, yeah, this is gonna be dope.

[Jay]

I mean, just me just, like, being with Naveen and a kid would be really cool. I mean, Naveen and I have, like, the best time, like, I can't even get over.

[Friend/Guest]

I guess it give you, like, an activity every day or, like, something to, like, bond over?

[David]

Every day.

[Jay]

Yes. And it gives you, like, purpose. It gives you the chance to share something with somebody you really, really love, which is, like. That's really cool.

[David]

So when this kid's 18, I think it'll be fun.

[Friend/Guest]

You'll be 75.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Friend/Guest]

Wow.

[Jay]

But we'll be living to, like, 150, right? Yeah. So I'll be a good 75.

[Friend/Guest]

You love saying that.

[Jay]

I do love saying that. That's positive thinking.

[David]

No, no, no.

[Jay]

Don't you think.

[Friend/Guest]

I mean, I hope you're right. I think about that a lot, that you say that.

[Jay]

There's nanobats coming in.

[David]

20, 30 nanobats.

[Jay]

Uh oh, nanobots. They're going in and like, kill the nanobats. Wait, what? It's a nanobat. I don't know.

[Natalie]

That's what you just said.

[David]

You made it up.

[Jay]

Nanobots. They're going to go in and kill all diseases in your body.

[David]

You think that'll happen?

[Jay]

Yeah, it'll be here in like five years.

[David]

Who says this to you?

[Jay]

I saw it on TikTok.

[David]

Oh yeah, that's legit.

[Jay]

Hey, I heard the Erewhon smoothie explained so well the other day. You want to hear this? I think you'll like this. Yeah, it was a USC professor. He's on TikTok. Really? Like this guy. He's like a smart guy. Obviously he's a professor. He was explaining Erewhon's business plan and whatever. And I was like, oh, that's cool. So he was like, when you make fun of somebody that goes to erewhon and pays $20 for a smoothie, he's like, those people aren't wrong for doing that. He's like, for $20, you're buying an entry point into like the 1% of the world.

[David]

Right, sure.

[Jay]

So like, when he explained that, I was like, because people always make fun of me if I spend $20 on a smoothie and I don't do it that much, but like, once in a while I'll do it.

[David]

Like the validation of you treating yourself is worth the money.

[Jay]

Yeah, yeah. Like for $20, you're buying an hour of like, oh my God. I'm. I'm with like, you know, really successful people. I can feel successful for that time. I thought it was a really cool explanation.

[David]

That is really interesting that. That almost goes along with my. That's like a very. What's woke? What's the word for another word for woke? I think that's like a very forward thinking way to think about it.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

I think people, again, just like, they don't like phones out. I don't like Erewhon smoothies.

[Jay]

Right.

[David]

It falls under the same category.

[Jay]

Right.

[David]

What was I gonna say? Oh, did you see the new Bob Lazar?

[Jay]

No, no, the Rogan one. What did he say?

[David]

So I just watched the new. So Bob Lazar is this guy who used to work at Area 51.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

And he's a whistleblower and he basically said he was working on this spacecraft.

[Jay]

He was the guy you'd want to have dinner with.

[David]

Yes. And not only that, but Logan Paul has alien footage that he bought off Somebody like real alien footage. And he's been holding it and he just posted it for the first time.

[Jay]

Oh, he did.

[David]

And he showed Bob Lazar. Cause it matched up with what Bob Lazar was describing. And Bob watched Logan's footage and was like, this is exactly what it was.

[Jay]

Wow.

[David]

It's crazy.

[Jay]

What's in Logan's footage?

[David]

It's not very clear, but it's basically these guys, they pulled up to the gates of Area 51. They're in the car.

[Natalie]

They're like college students.

[David]

College students. They have like a camcorder on basically the dash. Like a vhs, like family style recorder.

[Jay]

Is it Logan?

[David]

No, no. He bought it from someone.

[Jay]

He bought it from someone.

[David]

And there is a orange saucer that flies right over the car, lights up the car in orange, and under the saucer, it's all lit up orange. And you could see the saucer kind of wobbling through the air in like this very particular, particular, very strange way that I've never seen a saucer fly.

[Jay]

Wow.

[David]

Anyway, you guys should definitely watch. It's called S4 Bob Lazar. This isn't an ad or anything, obviously. I'm just like so obsessed with it. It's. It's full on this guy. So believable. There's definitely aliens on this planet. I don't know how we've kept it hidden. So basically he's working on the spacecraft that's from 38 light years away. It's from this other plant, it's from this other solar system that has two stars and they've come here. He only got to work on one spacecraft. And there was one moment where he was.

[Jay]

When you say spacecraft, you mean alien spacecraft?

[David]

Alien, like straight up saucer.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

He went to the saucer and like described how the. And this entire documentary is AI I think it's made by AI or something. But that's really nice. Cause he got to like fully describe exactly.

[Friend/Guest]

In the video, you see exactly what he was seeing when he was working

[David]

at Area 51, because he's made the AI 100% to what he saw. And there was a moment where they took. Every Wednesday the US government takes these saucers out for test flight. And there was one time where they took it out of the hangar. And at that moment all the other hangars were open and he could look down all the hangars. There was nine other compartments. And he saw all the other spacecrafts that the US was working on. All different kinds of spacecraft. So it's like, not only do we have spacecrafts, but we have a lot of different versions of. It's really fucking interesting stuff.

[Jay]

These are spacecrafts that the US Government has abducted or not abducted. Taken. Taken over. Right. Or ones they're building or have crashed

[David]

or have been gifted. Like, we don't know. We don't know. And the. And the seats. It's also like, isn't it so bizarre that, like, why are aliens portrayed the way they are? Like the little green guys with the wide eyes, no nose, no ears. Like, why is that? That's how Bob Lazar describes them, too.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

And he did this in the 70s or the 80s. So there obviously has to be some truth to why aliens are portrayed in flying saucers.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

And why they look fucking green and gray and they look three feet tall. Like, there has to be a reason

[Jay]

for it, because that's what people have seen.

[David]

Yeah. Like, how crazy is that?

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

That there is, like, some reality to these aliens.

[Jay]

I just.

[David]

How is it that we're so close and so far away from it? I don't get it.

[Jay]

I don't understand. I don't understand why they're not, you know, down the street at the gas station. You know what I mean?

[David]

It doesn't make any sense.

[Jay]

Doesn't. And Bob Lazar is not under any kind of NDA or anything with the government.

[David]

No. So he talks about that, how they all, like, how they all, like, threatened him and all these kinds of things.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

And. But, like, at the end of the day, they were like, well, Bob Lazar and all his friends were like, they could either kill him.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[David]

And prove all his stories to be true or just let him talk and people can believe him or they cannot believe him. Like, that makes most sense. Like, you're not gonna kill the guy that's already gotten his thing out there to everybody. But why Bob got in trouble.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Friend/Guest]

Initially it's because he told his neighbors about it. And he was like. Before he stopped working there, he found out when they do the test flights, and it was every Wednesday. So he took his friends out, like, eight miles out with a telescope, and he's like, I know. They're gonna do a test flight of the UFO. Wednesday, 9pm so they drove out to the Vegas desert. They lived in Vegas, him and his, like, five friends. And they watched these spaceships fly through the air in the middle of the night. And all his friends were like, yeah, it's legit. Like, we're watching.

[David]

What? Bob.

[Jay]

That's why he got in trouble, because he told civilians.

[Friend/Guest]

Yes. And then he went on a Radio station as an anonymous guy, and then it, like, snowballed into him going on the Joe Rogan podcast. This is the most viewed podcast Joe Rogan's ever had. Wow, my nipples are hard talking about this.

[Natalie]

Why are you rubbing your nipples?

[David]

I just, like.

[Friend/Guest]

I love it. I love it. I think it's so interesting.

[Natalie]

It is really interesting.

[Jay]

It is.

[Friend/Guest]

It's like, how does. I don't know. And then he gets into. He also gets into talking about other things.

[David]

It's really interesting because there's.

[Friend/Guest]

He'll talk about, like, Project Looking Glass.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Friend/Guest]

And basically it'll talk about how. How the. The alien. The aliens have been visiting Earth for the last 10,000 years, and they've adapted the human's DNA 54 times just to get us to where we are. So, like, the human, like, the aliens are building our. Building our bodies to be these containers. He reference to refers to our bodies as containers. He's like, I don't know what the containers is. Like, I don't know if it's a container for a soul or if it's for a brain. Like, he doesn't know what that.

[Jay]

What do you mean they're building it?

[Friend/Guest]

Like, they're.

[David]

They're.

[Jay]

What do you mean they're building our bodies?

[Friend/Guest]

They're helping us. They're evolving us. Sorry.

[Jay]

Ah.

[Friend/Guest]

And then he also says. He's like, also, take what I'm saying with a grain of salt, because there's a lot of things that I read in files that the CIA and the. That the CIA purposefully puts in there. So if you ever go and talk about it to other people, they know where it came from. So they'll give you a file and they'll lie about something so they know it's you, that you're whistleblowing because it's not real. So they'll put faulty stuff in there just to fuck with you. So he's like, with a grain of salt. Some of the things I didn't see but I read, those may not be 100% accurate because they may just be things that I've. That I've been fed.

[Jay]

Wow, he sounds really credible.

[Friend/Guest]

That's exactly why he sounds so credible, because he's like, the things I have seen, I know that I've seen.

[Jay]

Right.

[David]

And it's also really interesting.

[Friend/Guest]

He talked about the first time he saw the saucer fly. His instructor was like, okay, go ahead, walk up to the saucer. It was hovering above the ground.

[David]

You could hear a little hum. It was giving.

[Friend/Guest]

And the way the Saucer flies is it jumps. So. So it jumps rather than floats to a point. It, like, jumps through almost through, like, space and time to get to the next thing. And the saucer was hovering right above him. And then his instructor, like, called him

[David]

to look over to him.

[Friend/Guest]

And then he looked back at the saucer and the saucer was gone.

[David]

And then his instructor was like, do

[Friend/Guest]

you think the saucer is gone? He's like, yes, it's gone. And he's like, take five steps forward. And he took five more steps forward and he saw the saucer again. The saucer was bending light around it so it would be completely invisible.

[David]

Wow.

[Friend/Guest]

Yeah. But then he said that they were, like, also communicating with the saucer with a regular radio. And he's like, I don't know how that makes sense. It doesn't add up, because radio waves. There's no way that the radio waves

[David]

could get through the saucer because it

[Friend/Guest]

was bending light waves. So I don't know how they were.

[David]

He was like, there's things that aren't

[Friend/Guest]

adding up that I can't explain. So that's why it also makes him credible, because he'll, like, say things that don't make sense, right? And he'll like. And he'll be like, I don't know how it doesn't make sense, but it doesn't make sense.

[David]

It's really, really interesting.

[Jay]

Damn.

[David]

Yeah, it's you.

[Friend/Guest]

You really gotta watch it.

[David]

It's fucking really, really incredible. Incredible, incredible story. But, yeah, okay. That's all the time we have for today's pod. Sorry I went into fucking aliens again. I'm trying not to. It's my New Year's resolution, but we'll see you guys for the next one. Next Views Podcast.

[Friend/Guest]

Bye Bye.

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[David]

power.

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