HTDE: The Perfect Christmas Present with James Patterson and Gillian Flynn

Summary

Podcast Summary: HTDE: The Perfect Christmas Present with James Patterson and Gillian Flynn

Podcast Title: Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
Episode: HTDE: The Perfect Christmas Present with James Patterson and Gillian Flynn
Release Date: December 11, 2024
Host: NPR
Description: NPR's weekly news quiz hosted by Peter Sagal. This episode features bestselling authors James Patterson and Gillian Flynn assisting a listener in crafting the perfect Christmas present—a heartfelt bedtime story for his wife.

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Introduction

The episode kicks off with Peter Sagal introducing a special segment where hosts Mike Danforth and Ian Chillock collaborate with renowned authors James Patterson and Gillian Flynn to help a listener, Charlie, create the perfect Christmas present for his wife. The segment promises a blend of literary expertise and creative brainstorming aimed at transforming Charlie's bedtime story into a memorable gift.

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Listener's Challenge: Crafting the Perfect Ending

Timestamp [03:40] – Charlie's Dilemma

Charlie reaches out seeking assistance in finalizing the ending of a bedtime story he co-wrote with his sons. Despite his efforts, he struggles to move beyond juvenile humor elements like ghosts, ninjas, zombies, and farts. His goal is to develop a meaningful and impactful conclusion that resonates beyond mere humor.

Charlie’s Synopsis:

• Protagonist: Bella, a happy umbrella who loves rainy days.
• Conflict: Bella's family dislikes the rain and decides to vacation in the desert, leading to Bella getting lost and encountering zombies—a plot twist suggested by his sons.

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Gillian Flynn's Expertise: Developing a Dark yet Meaningful Ending

Timestamp [06:12] – Gillian Flynn's Approach

Gillian Flynn emphasizes the importance of character-driven narratives rather than plot-focused endings. She suggests exploring Bella's inherent desire to be outside, portraying her as a metaphor for personal freedom and resistance against suppression.

Notable Quote:

"I think you start with who your character is. Like, you know, I write character-based books that happen to be mysteries, but I think the initial conflict is beautiful and it's there."
– Gillian Flynn [06:24]

Flynn proposes that Bella's love for the rain symbolizes a deeper longing for freedom, making her family's opposition a source of internal conflict. She envisions a climax where Bella confronts her family's aversion, leading to a transformative resolution.

Timestamp [07:53] – Enhancing the Narrative

Flynn suggests adding layers to the story by introducing supernatural elements, such as Bella cursing her family by opening herself indoors, causing a series of unfortunate events. This twist not only adds suspense but also underscores the consequences of denying one's true nature.

Notable Quote:

"They could really hold them by umbrella point and, you know, force them to take her outside."
– Gillian Flynn [08:24]

She envisions an empowering ending where Bella asserts her autonomy, culminating in her family experiencing rain for the first time and appreciating Bella's true essence.

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James Patterson's Creative Contributions: Expanding the Story Universe

Timestamp [10:57] – James Patterson Joins the Discussion

James Patterson brings a vibrant and imaginative perspective, offering multiple creative endings that infuse humor and fantastical elements into Charlie's story.

Ending Ideas Presented by Patterson:

1. Bella and the Farting Ninjas:

   • Plot: Bella, an umbrella from Japan, encounters farting ninjas on a boat. After being neglected in New York, she reunites with the ninjas, leading to a whimsical and stinky adventure.
   • Notable Quote:

     "Bella dances with the farting ninjas. Maybe they become briefly hold me, for her life is good, but stinky."
     – James Patterson [11:19]

2. Brooklyn Adventure:

   • Plot: Bella and her companion Luca navigate rainy Brooklyn, culminating in a lively scene at Coney Island where children with umbrellas dance and sing in the rain.
   • Notable Quote:

     "They see hundreds of kids there. And all the kids, the hold mes, have umbrellas. And they all dance and sing in the rain on the beach at Coney Island."
     – James Patterson [12:28]

3. A Graceful Farewell:

   • Plot: After Luca, Bella's companion, passes away, Bella attends her funeral and finds a new purpose with Luca's granddaughter, despite facing wear and tear from continual use.

4. Facing the Sun:

   • Plot: On a perfect rainy day, Bella and her companion enjoy the weather until unexpected sunshine threatens Bella's existence. Bella selflessly protects her companion from the sun, finding a new sense of purpose.

Notable Quote:

"Bella could really hold them by umbrella point and, you know, force them to take her outside."
– James Patterson [08:24]

Patterson's ideas blend heartfelt moments with quirky humor, offering Charlie a range of options from whimsical to touching.

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Language Inclusivity Debate: Eliminating "You Guys"

Timestamp [19:11] – Language Inclusivity Discussion

The conversation shifts to a broader topic on gender-inclusive language, sparked by listener feedback. Ed Istone shares his concerns about the potential unintended consequences of eliminating the phrase "you guys" from everyday vocabulary.

Notable Quote:

"By eliminating you guys from our vocabulary, we reinforce the notion that only male persons can be guys, which could lead to an increase in the use of the traditionally used female equivalent term girls to refer to adult women."
– Ed Istone [19:28]

Istone argues that restricting "you guys" might inadvertently encourage the use of "girls" for adult women, which he finds more harmful and offensive. He suggests that a more inclusive modification to the term might be more effective.

Charlie contributes by sharing his strategy of using the iPhone’s text replacement feature to substitute "guys" with "folks," offering a practical solution for listeners aiming to adopt more inclusive language.

Notable Quote:

"It's less and less because the other great thing is that it's kind of like a gentle reminder anytime I do it."
– Charlie [21:13]

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Conclusion: Final Thoughts and Closing Remarks

The episode wraps up with hosts acknowledging the creative inputs from Patterson and Flynn, expressing gratitude for their contributions. They encourage listeners to continue submitting their questions and engage with the show for future assistance.

Notable Quote:

"I learned that next time I have trouble writing something, all I need to do is ask James Patterson. He came ready with like four or five different ideas."
– Mike Danforth [22:33]

The hosts sign off with a light-hearted note, teasing the ongoing adventures and potential future scenarios for Bella, while promoting upcoming episodes and encouraging listener participation.

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Key Takeaways

• Collaborative Creativity: Leveraging the expertise of bestselling authors can significantly enhance and inspire creative projects.
• Character-Driven Narratives: Focusing on character motivations and conflicts can lead to more meaningful and impactful storytelling.
• Inclusivity in Language: Thoughtful consideration of language usage is essential to promote inclusivity without unintended negative consequences.
• Practical Solutions: Simple tools like text replacement features can aid in adopting more inclusive language habits.

Notable Quotes

• Gillian Flynn:
  "I think you start with who your character is. Like, you know, I write character-based books that happen to be mysteries, but I think the initial conflict is beautiful and it's there."
  [06:24]

• James Patterson:
  "Bella dances with the farting ninjas. Maybe they become briefly hold me, for her life is good, but stinky."
  [11:19]

• Ed Istone:
  "By eliminating you guys from our vocabulary, we reinforce the notion that only male persons can be guys, which could lead to an increase in the use of the traditionally used female equivalent term girls to refer to adult women."
  [19:28]

• Charlie:
  "It's less and less because the other great thing is that it's kind of like a gentle reminder anytime I do it."
  [21:13]

---

This episode of Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! skillfully blends humor, literary insight, and thoughtful discussions, offering listeners both entertainment and valuable takeaways for personal and creative endeavors.

Transcript

[Capella University]

This message comes from Capella University. With Capella's flexpath learning format, you can set your own deadlines and learn on your schedule. A different future is closer than you think with Capella University. Learn more at Capella. Edu.

[Mike Danforth]

Hey there.

[Ian Chillock]

Wait, wait.

[Peter]

Listeners, it's Peter. We have a new episode of how to Do Everything, hosted by our very own Mike Danforth and Ian Chillock. Today, Mike and Ian recruit some of the biggest names in literature to help a listener with the perfect Christmas present for his wife. Oh, the things we do for love. If you like what you hear on that show, make sure to follow them at their very own feed. But in the meantime, enjoy the latest how to Do Everything.

[Mike Danforth]

It's December and it's cold, which leads to the question, how do you stay warm?

[Peter]

Burn something.

[Mike Danforth]

Ed Istone just coached the BYU cross country team to a national championship in freezing cold temperatures, and he has a tip.

[Ed Istone]

Yeah, we have a little bit of a hack prior to the start of the race. There's that five minutes where you will strip down, take those sweats off, and you're just standing there shivering in your short shorts and your singlet. So the little hack that we found, and it's very old school, our trainers and coaches will just coat the runner's arms, exposed shoulders and legs with a thin little layer of olive oil. And that tends to give them a little buffer from the cold. And particularly if it's a windy day and if the temperatures are, you know, freezing, it just kind of bridges that gap until the gun finally sounds and then they are on their way.

[Peter]

And is this like a special sports performance olive oil or is this just go to the grocery store?

[Ed Istone]

Yeah, no, it's just whatever's on sale that day, that particular day, or whatever our trainer comes back with, you know, and it's interesting, though, because I've been contacted from a olive oil company out of New York. I won't give you the brand name because we haven't inked the deal yet, but they want to be our sponsors. So. Yeah, kind of funny.

[Peter]

If I were to, if I were to go back and watch this race, the footage would I say, you know what? BYU looks shinier than all the other runners on the start line.

[Ed Istone]

Well, I don't know that that would have been that dramatic. I think more than anything, it's interesting because I've got a couple of mechanical engineering majors in my program that actually ran. One was in particular, they said because of the viscosity of the oil, it can kind of trap a thin layer of air between your skin and the oil itself. So it's kind of multiple layers there, and that provides some insulation from the convection that you would normally have from the cold air.

[Mike Danforth]

Wait, so, Ed, did any of the other teams that were competing say anything? Did they notice and react?

[Ed Istone]

No, and I don't think it's really that unique. I think the older coaches had probably seen it done before, and many of them, if they were runners in a previous life, had may actually experience. I was a runner before going into this coaching gig, and I actually won the NCAA championship back in 1984. So I think that was a 40 year anniversary. The race was in Penn State and we had a little snow flurries that morning and my coach had me don the olive oil and I crossed the finish line smelling like a plate of spaghetti or whatever.

[Mike Danforth]

Stay greasy, Ed.

[Ian Chillock]

All right.

[Peter]

Hey, Charlie, what can we help you with?

[Charlie]

Yeah, so my wife is really good at telling bedtime stories to my boys. Just out of nowhere, she'll just kind of make a story and they'll give her really good ideas. And I've tried. I just can't land it.

[Mike Danforth]

Okay.

[Charlie]

I am trying to figure out how to kind of write an ending to a bedtime story that I want to give my wife for Christmas. I've got the story idea that I wrote with my boys, but I do not know how to end it. And every time that they try to help me, it always ends in just like, little boy humor about ghosts or ninjas or zombies or farts. I'm hoping to get a good ending, a solid ending that means something.

[Mike Danforth]

Yeah. If a ninja farts on a zombie, that's not the ending you're looking for.

[Charlie]

That is literally one of the endings that my voice made up for this book.

[Peter]

Can you give us a synopsis of what you do have, I guess, of the first couple acts?

[Charlie]

Sure. It's Bella, the umbrella, and she's a happy umbrella who loves being outside and loves stormy skies and rainy days. But then her family doesn't like the rain, so they go on a vacation. And then that's where it kind of diverges. In one version, they go on a vacation to the desert, and then she gets lost, and then zombies attack. That's what the boys made up.

[Mike Danforth]

Yep.

[Peter]

With that setup, the zombies, it really that it is deus ex machina.

[Mike Danforth]

I think that's it's a real twist. That's true. Okay, so Bella, she's an umbrella. She likes the rain. Her family doesn't. They go on vacation.

[Peter]

And is her family also Umbrellas or is it a human family she lives with?

[Charlie]

Great questions. So when I'm writing it out, it's literally just an umbrella with a human family. But you don't see the humans. Oh, I don't think the humans know. I clearly have not thought that through.

[Mike Danforth]

Well, no, our job, Charlie, is not to poke holes in the story. Our job is to help you land the plane and we are here to do that. Yeah, okay, I think, Charlie, I think we can help you. What we're going to do here is we're going to go to two of the best selling authors of all time. First up, a writer who's written some incredible endings, incredible twists, Gillian Flynn.

[Peter]

Gillian is the author of Gone Girl. Sharp Objects, Dark Places. So Gillion, you have the story, you've got this umbrella, this family that doesn't want to go outside. Where does this take you?

[Gillian Flynn]

Okay. They don't like going outside is like they're agoraphobic or they just don't like.

[Peter]

Yeah, I don't know if it's a pathology, but they definitely. Bella wants to be outside. They don't.

[Gillian Flynn]

Just wanted to check for plot purposes.

[Peter]

And he sort of doesn't know where to begin. Do you begin with an ending or do you begin with something, you know, where does it start for you?

[Gillian Flynn]

I never ever begin with an ending. I never know what the ending's gonna be. And personally I think that's the best way to write. So I think he's onto something right there. I think you start with who your character is. Like, you know, I write character based books that happen to be mysteries, but I think the initial conflict is beautiful and it's there, which is Bella. An umbrella obviously needs to get outside. I mean, that's only to her nature. It's almost cruel to keep an umbrella inside for too long.

[Peter]

When you put it that way, it's sort of. It's almost as if Bella is a prisoner in this home and there's something dark about this family. Actually, it's.

[Gillian Flynn]

It is dark. Yeah, it's like, you know, telling a captain he can't go to sea. I'm sorry, I get seasick. You gotta stay home. But I'm a captain. But. No, stay here.

[Mike Danforth]

So we're moving this from like a children's story now. It's maybe become a young adult novel.

[Gillian Flynn]

Maybe, maybe. Might be.

[Mike Danforth]

Yeah.

[Gillian Flynn]

I think I would, you know, go with your idea of she's being sort of kept prisoner and here's this family resisting and actually rejecting who she is innately. I mean, That's. That's a horrifying thing, that you're trapped with people who really dislike who you are inherently, as a umbrella and. Sorry, I'm from Kansas City. I say umbrella. Umbrella.

[Mike Danforth]

Yeah. You really do, huh?

[Gillian Flynn]

Umbrellas. And, you know, does Bella. You know, what do you think? Does Bella start getting a little angry as she. She's got that pointy end that most umbrellas do. I mean, I don't want to end with something too dark, but, you know, she could really hold them by umbrella point and, you know, force them to take her outside.

[Peter]

Also, I'm sure Bella is aware that opening an umbrella inside is terrible luck for the humans. I love that she could curse them by just opening herself.

[Gillian Flynn]

Oh, they have a series of really unlucky and unfortunate events, and they can't figure out why it is. And then suddenly they realize they see this umbrella that they've previously neglected in the corner mysteriously opened. I love that.

[Peter]

That's fun.

[Gillian Flynn]

Not entirely holiday spirit.

[Charlie]

No.

[Mike Danforth]

I feel like we've lost it completely at this point.

[Peter]

I like it, though.

[Gillian Flynn]

I mean, I really do like the idea of her hopping up the stairs one night, her unsuspecting family flapping umbrella arms. She's like a furious bat. And she just takes them by. Points them, you know, at. Right at the throat, her little pointed umbrella and says, take me out of here. You're getting me out of here. And out they go. And then, you know, then maybe they get outside and they're, you know, they sort of see the rain. And if you want a hopeful moment, there's kind of like, well, thank you, Bella. You know, you did use force, but ultimately, I'm less scared of rain, so I learned my lesson.

[Mike Danforth]

But also, you can't have a rainbow without rain. So maybe there's a happy ending that happens where there's a rainbow.

[Peter]

They've never seen a rainbow because they've never gone out.

[Gillian Flynn]

Yes, they've never gone out. I do like that. I do like that. And she's like, you know, that goes maybe back if we want them agoraphobic again, that they really never leave their house. I think umbrellas are like women in thrillers. They're both beautiful and scary at the same time.

[Mike Danforth]

Remember that, Charlie. Okay, now we're gonna move on to our next bestselling author, James Patterson.

[Ian Chillock]

Oh, my God. It's National Public Radio.

[Mike Danforth]

Is this James Patterson?

[Ian Chillock]

Am I being punked?

[Mike Danforth]

His new book is the House of Cross. It's out now.

[Ian Chillock]

You gonna give me the prompt, or did I just rock?

[Peter]

I'LL bring you in. Yeah.

[Ian Chillock]

Okay.

[Peter]

James Patterson. You heard what Charlie has. You heard the beginning. And we understand you have taken this on and written him some endings. Can you walk us through them?

[Ian Chillock]

Well, they just came through. You know, I have this, you know, prolific or prodigious imagination or whatever the heck it is. I call it a sickness. So, number one, I want to go with Charlie's kids ideas I know he wasn't keen on. But this is called Bella and the Farting Ninjas.

[Mike Danforth]

Perfect.

[Ian Chillock]

Okay. Bella is on a boat from Japan. She's with her person, and she calls her person her hold me, okay? And they meet the farting ninjas on board. Bella thinks they're vulgar, uncivilized, juvenile, and stinky. Of course, months later, she's very lonely in New York. She's being kept in an umbrella stand more than she'd like to. And one day, her hold me pulls her out of the stand. And outside, a New York cop has turned on a fire hydrant in the street. What's this? The farting ninjas are dancing in the hydrant spray. It looks like stinky fun. Bella and her hold me join them. Bella dances with the farting ninjas. Maybe they become briefly hold me, for her life is good, but stinky. Okay, number two.

[Charlie]

Hold on.

[Mike Danforth]

That's fantastic. What a beautiful story.

[Ian Chillock]

Keep going. This takes place in Brooklyn.

[Mike Danforth]

Number two, all right, all right.

[Ian Chillock]

Heavy accent. Bella, the umbrella. And Bella's person, her hold me in this one is Luca. So we got Bella, the umbrella and Luca, okay? And Luca's grumpy and gloomy because it's a rainy day. And they walk the gloomy streets of Brooklyn until they end up in Coney island. And they see hundreds of kids there. And all the kids, the hold mes, have umbrellas. And they all dance and sing in the rain on the beach at Coney Island. So that's number two in Brooklyn. Or number three. 100%. Bella's hold me dies a sweet old lady, beautiful death. Her time was up. Bella goes to the funeral. She goes with her new hold me, the old lady's granddaughter. She's already liking this hold me so, so much life goes on. Until, of course, Bella's canopy. Her metal ribs start to break down. But we won't go into that, the fourth one. And this is the one I would do as the feature movie. It's a beautiful rainy day. Bella couldn't be happier. This is heaven for her. Cars and trucks are coming by and splashing Bella and her hold me. Her hold me is not as happy about this as Bella. Then suddenly, out of nowhere, a heartbreaker for Bella. The sun is coming out. Blue skies, sun. Bella doesn't know what to do. But her hold me heads to the beach. What's this? Suddenly, Bella has a new purpose. She's what comes between her hold me and the damaging rays of the sun. Beautiful, Bella. Just beautiful. Now I'm skipping a few. I'm skipping Bella and the blizzard, Bella and the two tsunami and Bella and the Deadpool episode. But there's so many ways to take this story.

[Mike Danforth]

You know what? That's incredible, James.

[Ian Chillock]

All right. That's what we do. That's what we do here in the little workshop.

[Mike Danforth]

My goodness.

[Peter]

I understand how you have written more than 200 novels. That is.

[Ian Chillock]

Yeah, I could write another hundred about Bella. We could probably do this about Bella every. Every week. We could. Come on.

[Mike Danforth]

Do you think we have a series here, the whole.

[Ian Chillock]

Yeah, the Deadpool. I want to do that one. The Tsunami, big one. Blizzard, Big, unexpected.

[Mike Danforth]

So maybe. Maybe we should. Well, Charlie now has.

[Ian Chillock]

Charlie's got a choice.

[Mike Danforth]

So many rich ideas. Yeah.

[Ian Chillock]

All right. Well, good for Charlie.

[Mike Danforth]

Would you ever like. You have worked with some incredible people. You've co authored books with Dolly Parton, Bill Clinton. You're working on one with Viola Davis.

[Ed Istone]

Ye.

[Ian Chillock]

Which is great. I love working with her.

[Mike Danforth]

How does that process work?

[Ian Chillock]

Just like this. I just do all the work. And they take credit on the COVID No, it varies with whoever I'm writing with.

[Mike Danforth]

Do you ever work with. So, like, Charlie is working on.

[Ian Chillock]

I'm not going to work with Charlie. No. With all due respect.

[Mike Danforth]

Well, James, thank you so much for helping out. Thank you, Charlie. This is great.

[Ian Chillock]

Okay. We look. Yeah. Charlie, good luck and keep coming up with those wonderful ideas. And yeah, Stella, the umbrella is her sister. Okay. Be good.

[Mike Danforth]

If you would like us to answer your question, send it to us at our email address, which is howtopr.org that's.

[Peter]

Where we get email from you when you Write in to howtopr.org and we should say we are coming up hurdling towards the end of this season of how to Do Everything. Just two episodes after this one.

[Mike Danforth]

Two episodes left.

[Peter]

So if you have a pressing problem, now is the time to get it to us.

[Mike Danforth]

We will be back for season two, but if your question is urgent, get it to us quickly, get it to us now, and we can maybe if.

[Gillian Flynn]

Oof.

[Mike Danforth]

I think we could probably. We'll do our best.

[Peter]

Your welfare between our seasons. Between seasons of this show is not our responsibility as much as we would like it to be.

[Mike Danforth]

Once again, that email is how to pr.org.

[Capella University]

This message comes from Schwab. At Schwab, how you invest is your choice, not theirs. That's why when it comes to managing your wealth, Schwab gives you more choices. You can invest and trade on your own plus get advice and more comprehensive wealth solutions to help meet your unique needs. With award winning service, low costs and transparent advice, you can manage your wealth your way at Schwab. Visit schwab.com to learn more. This message comes from Capella University Learning doesn't have to get in the Way of life With Capella's game changing flexpath learning format, you can set your own deadlines and learn on your own schedule. That means you don't have to put your life on hold to earn your degree. Instead, enjoy learning your way and pursue your educational and career goals without missing a beat. A different future is closer than you think with Capella University. Learn [e-mail] this message comes from BetterHelp this holiday season, do something for a special person in your life.

[Peter]

You give yourself the gift of better mental health.

[Capella University]

BetterHelp online therapy connects you with a qualified therapist via phone, video or live chat. It's convenient and affordable and can be done from the comfort of your own home. Having someone to talk to is truly a gift, especially during the holidays. Visit betterhelp.com NPR to get 10% off your first month. This message comes from Lagavulin Single Malt Scotch Whiskey Wherever your curiosity takes you, there will always be more to uncover and savor. Every door leads to another. In each sip of Lagavulin, new flavor notes revealed an endless journey of discovery for anyone that yearns it. Follow your intrigue through the smoke and find what lies beyond Lagavulin beyond the smoke. Please drink responsibly. Diageo New York, New York this is.

[Peter]

Eric Glass on this American Life. We specialize in compelling stories from everyday life.

[Gillian Flynn]

I was like, wow, you literally just.

[Ed Istone]

Died and came back and the first.

[Peter]

Thing you ask is do you need any money? Real life stories. Really good ones in your podcast Feed this American Life. We are still in the midst of our you guys fast. We're attempting to eliminate you guys and hey guys from our vocabularies. All of us here at how to have been failing.

[Mike Danforth]

It's. Well, we've had mixed results.

[Peter]

Yeah. But I think we've each. We've each at least had one failure in front of the others.

[Mike Danforth]

Yeah.

[Peter]

Which has been humiliating.

[Mike Danforth]

And we've gotten several emails from you out there.

[Peter]

And here's Alyssa. Alyssa called in with a different take on this whole concept.

[Ed Istone]

My thoughts on the you guys fast. I appreciate the good intentions of you guys fact to be more inclusive, but my feeling is that the unintended potential consequences of it may be worse. By eliminating you guys from our vocabulary, we reinforce the notion that only male persons can be guys, which could lead to an increase in the use of the traditionally used female equivalent term girls to refer to adult women. In my view, any reference of adult women as girls is far more harmful and offensive than being included in you guys. Moving you guys to a more gender inclusive term may be more helpful.

[Peter]

It's a really interesting point. We neutralize it by using it more.

[Ed Istone]

Yeah, exactly.

[Mike Danforth]

Is that the solution to this? We kind of hinted at it in the last episode that maybe what we do is we go on a you guys fast for 30 days or for a month, and then we follow that up with a you guys rampage.

[Charlie]

Maybe.

[Ed Istone]

Maybe that's the solution and see what works better.

[Mike Danforth]

Yeah, Jeff called in with a tip to help eliminate you guys from your vocabulary.

[Charlie]

Yeah, so I use the text replacement feature on my iPhone, which lets you type in whatever word or phrase and then it just autocorrects into whatever you want it to be. So, yeah, I have guys in there and I have an autocorrect to folks.

[Mike Danforth]

Oh, man, that's great.

[Peter]

How long have you had this set up like this?

[Charlie]

Probably about three years or so.

[Peter]

And how often do you think it autocorrects for you?

[Charlie]

Well, it's less and less because the other great thing is that it's kind of like a gentle reminder anytime I do it. It's like having someone kind of following you around reminding you.

[Mike Danforth]

Yeah. Has it ever caused problems? Have you ever written something where you needed it to say gu?

[Charlie]

Yes, all of the time.

[Mike Danforth]

Right?

[Charlie]

Yeah. So like, you know, like proper names of things is challenging. Like the five guys. I don't know if you have those.

[Mike Danforth]

Yeah.

[Peter]

I love a 5 Volks burger, personally.

[Mike Danforth]

I remember. Ian, do you remember when I changed your autocorrect on your phone? So that is. This is. This is a true story, Jeff. Years ago, we learned that you could do this and Ian would sign his emails. I feel like I'm revealing too much. Ian would sign emails, he would just say, hugs, Ian. And I went into his phone and I changed it. So every time it said hugs, it would say, I love you, Ian. And did it ever. It happened once right where it almost in my memory.

[Peter]

Didn't change. Hugs to I love you. What was it you changed whenever I typed? Ian well, that does it for today's show. What we learned today?

[Mike Danforth]

Mike well, I learned that next time I have trouble writing something, all I need to do is ask James Patterson. He came ready with like four or five different ideas there.

[Peter]

I like the idea that James Patterson could just help you with anything.

[Mike Danforth]

Well, like a holiday card. Like, that's always a tough thing to write. Like, that's the kind of thing where I do feel like, yeah, all right, James. What? You punch this up. Mike this is boring about your job. Let's have it where you're kidnapped.

[Peter]

How to Do Everything is produced by Hina Shravastava with technical direction from Lorna White.

[Mike Danforth]

Our intern this week is Suzanne Weiss.

[Peter]

Suzanne, look out. There's someone with a plate of very sharp knives behind you.

[Mike Danforth]

Thanks, Suzanne. Thanks for all your hard work.

[Peter]

Get us your questions for this season while you still can@how topr.org that's Ian and I'm Mike.

[Mike Danforth]

Thanks.

[Capella University]

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