Transcript

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Alzo Slade (0:21)

From NPR in WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, wait, don't tell Me, the NPR News quiz. I'm the man they bring in when Bill Curtis gets busted for claiming Peter as a dependent. I'm Alzo Slade, and here's your host at the Studebaker Theater at the Fine Arts Building in Chicago, Illinois, Peter Sago.

Peter Sagal (0:42)

Thank you, Alzo. Thanks, everyone. Thanks to all of you. Great to see you. We do have a fine show for you today. Later on, we're going to be talking for the first time ever on our show, but to a professional escort. That's right, the man who was paid to escort the Stanley Cup. What did you think I meant? But first, it's your turn to come on and try to check me into the boards. Give us a call. The number is 1-888-wait, wait. That's 1-888-924-8924. Let's welcome our first listener contestant. Hi. You're on. Wait, wait, don't tell me.

Listener/Contestant (1:12)

Hi.

Peter Sagal (1:13)

Hi. Who's this?

Listener/Contestant (1:15)

This is Jennifer. I live in Tampa, Florida. I am an ELCA Lutheran pastor. Yeah.

Peter Sagal (1:22)

So I think, and I'm not sure about this, but the one person who was excited about Tampa was also the same person excited about you being a Lutheran. So maybe it's a coincidence. Maybe they're just really happy today. We don't know.

Listener/Contestant (1:37)

Yes.

Peter Sagal (1:38)

Well, Jennifer, welcome to the show. Let me introduce you to our panel this week. First, a comedian who'll be appearing at the White Rabbit Cabaret in Indianapolis, Indiana, on Thursday, April 23rd. It's Adam Burke. Hi. Nice to meet you. Jennifer. Hi.

Listener/Contestant (1:50)

Hi.

Peter Sagal (1:53)

Next up, you can see here April 23rd through the 26th at Rooster T. Feathers in San Jose, California. And May 8th at the Hollywood Improv with the Netflix Is a Joke Festival, it's Dulce Sloan.

Listener/Contestant (2:04)

Hello. Hello, it's me. Amen.

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!"

Episode: We beef with the pontiff and admire the Stanley Cup
Host: Peter Sagal (NPR)
Panelists: Alonzo Bodden, Dulcé Sloan, Adam Burke
Special Guest: Phil Pritchard, Keeper of the Stanley Cup
Date: April 18, 2026

Episode Overview

This episode delivers another round of sharp, topical comedy as NPR’s Peter Sagal and the panel tackle unusual news from around the world. Highlights include President Trump’s improbable feud with the Pope, AI’s failures as an online doctor, whether you should eat fridge leftovers in an Airbnb, and an exclusive interview with Phil Pritchard, the man responsible for honoring and escorting the Stanley Cup. Listeners play the news quiz and limericks games, while comedians riff on everything from stale Peeps to meowing pilots.

Key Discussion Points & Segments

1. News Quiz: Jennifer the Lutheran Pastor vs. the Panel

Timestamps: 02:26–09:39

Presidential 'Beef' with the Pope
- President Trump criticized the Pope for being "very weak on crime," leading to jokes about whether we want a 'tough on crime' Pope.
- [02:52] “Apparently, President Trump was upset about the high crime rate in Vatican City as he took on who this week?” – Peter Sagal
- Panel riffed on the absurdity, referencing Chicago’s Italian heritage and Netflix’s ‘Only Murders in the Conclave’.
- [03:41] “If you wanted any proof that Donald Trump knows nothing about history, he's starting a beef with an Italian guy from Chicago.” – Alonzo Bodden
AI Chatbots as Medical Advisors
- New research: AI chatbots get diagnoses wrong 80% of the time.
- Alzo tried AI health advice: “Yeah, it told me that I was going through perimenopause." [06:20]
- Swedish researcher tricked AI with a fake disease; bots spread it anyway.
Airbnb Leftovers: Would You Eat Them?
- Guests debate if leftovers in rental fridges are opportunity or gross. Panel jokes about dubious random foods.
- [08:02] “Well, close in an Airbnb. ...Some people think that's gross. Other people are like, oh, great, free baba ganoush.” – Peter Sagal
- “If you are gonna make a recipe that calls for nothing but bay leaves, you are in business.” [09:10]

2. Listener Quiz: Cheese Law Changes & Bluff the Listener

Timestamps: 10:05–20:14

Swiss Cheese Makers Allowed to Add Artificial Holes
- Law change due to the disappearance of “natural” holes.
- [10:23] “Thanks to a change in the law in Switzerland, the makers of traditional Swiss cheese will now be able to add artificial what to their cheeses?” – Peter Sagal
- [11:38] “I love that Switzerland basically sat out World War I and II, but this they finally take a stance.” – Adam Burke
Bluff the Listener: Missed Opportunities
- Story 1: Sunken treasure research lost when new owner wipes a computer
- Story 2: Thief steals $2,000 handbag, discards $2.7 million Fabergé egg [Winner]
- Story 3: Broadway musical about Babe Ruth becomes New York’s camp classic after being spurned in Boston

3. “Not My Job” Interview: Phil Pritchard, Keeper of the Stanley Cup

Timestamps: 20:14–30:23

Unique Tradition
- Only one official Stanley Cup, which is toured around the world by Phil Pritchard for each winning team.
- [21:47] “...everybody on the team gets an opportunity to take it home, not only the players, the coaches, the trainers, the equipment managers, the staff, everyone gets time with it because it's a team event.” – Phil Pritchard
How It All Started
- Pritchard helped conceive the idea to let each team member take the cup home.
- “I think we've been to 31 countries with it around the world." [23:37]
- On weirdest things seen: water-skiing, sauna parties, mountain climbing with the cup.
Refuses to Take a Bribe
- Many try to buy extra days with the cup.
- [25:52] “Never taken a bribe.” – Phil Pritchard
If He Had the Cup for Himself?
- “I think for me, I would bring it back into my backyard and have an open house and, of course, an open bar.” [26:25]

4. Game Segments & Comedic Highlights

The Trump Dump Rapid Fire Quiz

Timestamps: 32:19–34:45

Satirical true/false news about Trump’s week, including a faux feud with the Pope, watching UFC with Vanilla Ice, and a dead raccoon penis anecdote from an RFK Jr. biography.

Weird News Roundup

Pilots meowing and barking over air traffic comms ([35:08])
Chore-mance: A trend where couples bond by doing housework together.
Beyond Meat’s new seltzer beverage... with protein ([39:41])
People who prefer stale Peeps ([40:33])

Lightning Fill in the Blank

Timestamps: 43:03–48:23

Topical questions cover the war in Iran, Hungary’s political change, air traffic control shaming unprofessional pilots, the moon mission, and Nintendo developers perfecting fart sound effects.

5. Predictions: Future Airbnb News

Timestamps: 49:15–49:35

“Airbnb on the moon.” – Alonzo Bodden
“Kid BnB, where you can adopt annoying kids left behind on vacation.” – Dulcé Sloan
“Air BnBnb: discount flights with Airbnb.” – Adam Burke

Notable Quotes

[03:50] “That never ends well.” – Alonzo Bowden on picking fights with Italian guys from Chicago
[06:20] “Yeah, it told me that I was going through perimenopause.” – Alzo Slade, on AI health advice
[08:28] “There are certain food items ... like your old vegetable oil, an unusably small amount of pancake mix. If you are gonna make a recipe that calls for nothing but bay leaves, you are in business.” – Peter Sagal
[21:47] “Everybody on the team gets an opportunity to take [the cup] home ... because it’s a team event.” – Phil Pritchard
[25:59] “Never taken a bribe.” – Phil Pritchard, on resisting extra payouts from NHL players
[35:08] “Was it the pilots doing the meowing and barking?” – Adam Burke
[38:02] “The hot new trend in dating, it’s choremance...” – Peter Sagal

Memorable Moments

The entire panel riffing on the idea of a “tough on crime” Pope and pitching “Only Murders in the Conclave” for Netflix. ([04:02])
AI chatbots inventing a fake illness (Bixonomania) and spreading it – thanks to a prank researcher ([06:26]).
Phil Pritchard describing some of the wild things hockey players do with the Stanley Cup (sauna parties, jet skiing) ([24:55]).
The panel’s horror and curiosity about eating crusty, years-old leftover Peeps ([41:12]).
Pilots meowing and barking over DC air traffic control and the subsequent “shade” from controllers ([35:08]).

Noteworthy Timestamps

02:50 – Trump’s ‘beef’ with the Pope
06:20 – Alzo’s perimenopause from ChatGPT
08:02 – Eating Airbnb leftovers
10:23 – Artificial holes in Swiss cheese
20:14 – Intro to Phil Pritchard, Stanley Cup escort
23:37 – Stanley Cup’s world tour tradition
25:52 – Refusing bribes for extra cup time
35:08 – Pilots meowing/barking over the radio
38:02 – Choremance trend
41:12 – Stale Peeps, the post-Easter treat
43:03 – Lightning Fill in the Blank begins
49:15 – Predictions for next Airbnb news story

Summary

Packed with puns, playful news coverage, and pop culture zingers, this episode highlights Wait Wait’s signature blend of comedy and current events. The panel lampoons political absurdities and odd human behaviors (from presidential religio-spats to AI misdiagnosis), while Phil Pritchard gives an inside peek at one of sports’ strangest and most cherished traditions. Listeners join the fun with quiz and limerick answers, while the show closes (as always) with creative predictions for the next great news story.

This summary captures all relevant, silly, and memorable moments – perfect for anyone who missed the episode or wants the gist of the laughs, debates, and news.