Wait Wait... Don’t Tell Me!
Episode Title: We meet America’s robo-teachers and take a nap in coach
Host: Peter Sagal (with announcer Alzo Slade)
Location: Johnny Mercer Theater, Savannah, Georgia
Air Date: March 28, 2026
Episode Overview
This episode of NPR’s iconic news quiz show brings humor and commentary around recent headlines, including the shocking debut of a humanoid robot “teacher” at the White House, the sudden cancellation of The Bachelorette, and why Americans apparently dislike spring. Peter Sagal and the panel—Shantira Jackson, Adam Burke, and Joyelle Nicole Johnson—are joined by actor and educator DW Moffat (Savannah College of Art and Design). Listeners participate in news quizzes, and segments cover trending stories about airline upgrades, viral restaurants, bald pride, and more—all delivered in the trademark witty, irreverent style of Wait Wait... Don’t Tell Me!
Key Segments & Discussion Points
1. Panel Intros & Opening Banter (00:22–02:24)
- Peter Sagal welcomes the Savannah audience and introduces announcer Alzo Slade.
- Introduction of the week’s panel: Shantira Jackson, Adam Burke, Joyelle Nicole Johnson.
- Fun with the idea of being “locals” in Savannah after just two days.
2. “Who’s Alzo This Time?” – Weekly News Quotation Quiz (02:24–09:43)
Contestant: Claudia from Chicago
Robo-Teachers at the White House (02:49)
- Melania Trump introduces a humanoid robot as her guest, envisioning robots teaching children.
- Peter Sagal jokes:
“Melania Trump says, death to the human teachers.” (03:17)
- Panel riffs on future of robot teachers and substitute “delivery robots.”
- Adam:
“If we pay the robots the way we pay teachers, they will revolt.” (03:53)
- Adam:
- Actual data discussed: Kids may find reading to robots less stressful than reading to humans.
The Bachelorette Season Cancelled (05:08)
- ABC cancels a season of The Bachelorette after footage emerges of the lead throwing chairs at her boyfriend.
- Joyelle:
“I made it to age 44 and I have never seen an episode…” (05:54)
- Adam:
“That show exists—it’s called the Senate.” (07:01)
- Panel jokes about gym influencer culture in The Bachelorette cast.
Why Americans Hate Spring (07:50)
- NYT reports “spring” is America’s least liked season—mud, allergies, unpredictable weather.
- Peter:
“Spring’s only big holiday is the one where you can’t have candy if you don’t believe in Jesus.” (08:23)
- Discusses efforts to re-market spring; mock Starbucks “pollen and sneeze latte.”
3. Airline Upgrade: Relax Rows in Economy (09:43–11:50)
- United Airlines to introduce “relax row” beds in economy—convertible cots with fitted sheets and blankets.
- Joyelle (mocking unfamiliarity with economy class):
“Peter, I fly first class. I don’t know what’s going on in the back of the airplane.” (10:14)
- Jokes about passengers exposing toes (and different “classes of toes”) in various cabin sections.
4. “Bluff the Listener” – Fake Restaurant Round (15:04–21:02)
Contestant: Owen, Iowa State engineering student
- Panelists present three fake “hot new dining destinations,” one real:
- Joyelle: Restaurant where all food is shaped into nuggets for picky kids (“Nothing But Nuggets”).
- Adam: SF restaurant for tech bros serving regular food as “gourmet,” diners unbothered by the reveal.
- Shantira (winner): UMass Amherst dining hall, treated as top-tier cuisine with chef-driven dishes (real story).
- Correct answer revealed by Wall Street Journal reporter Jasmine Lee.
5. Celebrity Guest: DW Moffat Interview (21:42–30:59)
- D.W. Moffat discusses his career (Friday Night Lights, Switched at Birth, One Battle After Another) and heading Savannah College of Art and Design’s Film & TV Department.
- Memorable moments:
- On playing a notorious “bad dad” in Friday Night Lights:
“I sometimes am delighted to appear on Worst Dads in Television History lists… When you play a bad guy, you can’t think ‘I’m a bad guy’. I was just playing a dad who was really invested in his son's future.” (22:46)
- On his role in One Battle After Another:
“I never read the script… My wife knows the post production supervisor, and she was like, oh, oh, no, he’s in the movie.” (24:01)
- Southern adaptation:
“My mother is a hillbilly from southeastern Kentucky… so I kind of had an inkling [about ‘bless your heart’].” (26:16)
- On playing a notorious “bad dad” in Friday Night Lights:
- Quiz Segment: On mass melees and oddball competitions worldwide; two out of three correct.
6. News Panel: Strange Support Groups and Podcast Decline (33:36–37:33)
- Adam answers: NYT profiled rising support group “r/bald” encouraging men to “embrace bald.”
- Sagal:
“The only thing worse than losing your hair is pretending you are not losing your hair.” (34:56)
- Joyelle:
“Bald is very sexy. I love a little cue ball head.” (35:10)
- Sagal:
- On the podcasting bubble bursting—fewer starting, many quitting.
- “Girls should keep their podcasts. Boys: time to turn in your mics.” (37:07)
7. Listener Limerick Challenge (39:06–42:30)
Contestant: Kelly from Wilmington, NC
- Limericks riff on trending lifestyle topics:
- Exposing “side butt” on red carpets (“peekabutt” trend)
- Taking bored toddlers to Home Depot
- Co-workers getting group Botox during lunch breaks
8. Lightning Fill-in-the-Blank (43:43–49:50)
- Quiz on the week’s news: Meta lawsuit, Army enlistment age, LaGuardia shutdown, electric vehicle trends, HBO’s Harry Potter, Irish rugby star courted for college football, faux “robot umpires” in baseball, OpenAI’s video generator, FDA warning over “Boner Bear Honey,” and more.
- Noteworthy moment:
- Joyelle:
“You know things are bad when the bank doesn’t have any money.” (45:27)
- Joyelle:
- Shantira and Joyelle tie for the win.
9. Panel Predictions & Sign-Off (50:34–51:57)
- Panel predicts what TV series will be canceled next, riffing on Euphoria, Bluey, and even “The United States of America.”
- Thank-yous to the Savannah theater, the production team, and the local staff and audience.
- Peter Sagal signs off:
“We’ll see you next week.” (51:53)
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
On robo-teachers:
“You better applaud louder. They will be in charge soon.”
– Peter Sagal, 02:55 -
On canceled reality TV:
“Taylor Frankie Paul sounds like she put her name in a reality TV show name generator.”
– Joyelle Nicole Johnson, 06:34 -
On spring’s new marketing slogan:
“Spring: It’s over soon.”
– Peter Sagal quoting the NYT, 09:02 -
On podcast fatigue:
“Without podcasts, where am I supposed to go hear three dudes talk about a movie for two hours longer than the runtime of the movie?”
– Peter Sagal, 36:39 -
On bank robberies in the modern era:
“You know things are bad when the bank doesn’t have any money.”
– Claudia (listener), 45:27 -
On fashion’s new “side butt” trend:
“What is a butt crack, but your lower cleavage?”
– Peter Sagal, 39:56
Timestamps for Important Segments
- Robo-teachers at the White House: 02:49–04:41
- Canceled ‘Bachelorette’ season: 05:08–07:36
- Americans hate spring: 07:50–09:14
- United “relax row” economy beds: 09:43–11:50
- Viral restaurants quiz: 15:04–21:02
- DW Moffat interview: 21:42–30:59
- Panel on baldness, podcast decline: 33:36–37:33
- Listener Limerick Challenge: 39:06–42:30
- Lightning Fill-in-the-Blank: 43:43–49:50
Final Thoughts
The March 28, 2026 episode features Wait Wait at its best: rapid-fire wit, topical news, and vibrant banter among Peter Sagal, the panel, listeners, and special guest DW Moffat. Listeners are treated to a comedic journey through headlines about robots in classrooms, canceled reality TV, and even the politics of toes in airline seating—plus plenty of irreverent reflections on American culture, both real and imagined.
For full content, visit Wait Wait... Don’t Tell Me! episode archive.
