Transcript

Announcer (0:00)

This message comes from stars. The global phenomenon Outlander returns for its final farewell. Claire and Jamie's story comes to an unforgettable end. Don't miss the final season of Outlander, Friday, March 6th, only on Starz.

Bill Curtis (0:19)

From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, wait, don't tell me, the NPR News quiz. I'm the man with a voice so smooth you could go curling on it, Bill Curtis. And here's your host at the Indiana University Auditorium in Bloomington, Indiana, Peter Sagoff.

Peter Sagal (0:41)

Thank you, Bill. Thank you, everybody. Thank you. It is great to be here at Indiana University iu, which thanks to their incredible football team, they just learned a little known secret. When you win the national college football championship, the coach gets a new record setting high salary and the rest of you get us. So later on, speaking of athletics, we're going to be talking to a proud Hoosier alum and multiple Olympic medalist swimmer Lily King. But first, it's your turn to compete. Give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Let's welcome our first listener contestant.

Bill Curtis (1:35)

Hi.

Josh Gondelman (1:35)

You're on.

Peter Sagal (1:35)

Wait, wait, don't tell me.

Bill Curtis (1:36)

Hi, I'm Bradley Petrick. I'm from Chicago, Illinois.

Peter Sagal (1:40)

Hey, how are things back in Chicago?

Bill Curtis (1:43)

Still very cold.

Peter Sagal (1:46)

I'm kind of glad to hear that because we're not there. What do you do in our hometown?

Bill Curtis (1:53)

So for my day job, I'm an enterprise consultant. But for my second gig, I run a local cat rescue here.

Peter Sagal (2:01)

Really?

Bill Curtis (2:03)

Yes.

Peter Sagal (2:05)

When you say here, do you mean your house?

Bill Curtis (2:10)

No, no, no. I mean at our adoption center.

Peter Sagal (2:13)

Okay. All right. All right. Well, that's very good work. I'm glad you do it. Welcome to the show. Bradley, let me introduce you to our panel. First, a stand up comedian performing at the Commonwealth Comedy Club outside Cincinnati on April 10th and 11th. And at the DC Improv on the 12th, it's Josh Gondelman.

Summary

Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!

Episode: We tackle the SOTU and Olympian Lilly King talks trash

Date: February 28, 2026
Host: Peter Sagal (with Bill Curtis)
Location: Indiana University Auditorium, Bloomington, Indiana
Panelists: Josh Gondelman, Faith Salie, Alonzo Bowden
Special Guest: Lilly King (Olympic swimmer)

Episode Overview

This lively episode of NPR’s Wait Wait… Don't Tell Me! blends the week’s news with quick wit, playful banter, and a Hoosier homecoming for Olympic swimmer Lilly King. The show tackles hot topics—including highlights and hilarity from the State of the Union (SOTU) address, cultural milestones like Survivor’s 50th season and the American Girl dolls’ 40th—while also delving into the unique mental and competitive strategies of a world-class athlete.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The State of the Union (SOTU): A Presidential Performance

[03:21–05:24]

The episode opens with games built around headline news, starting with President Trump's historic and eclectic SOTU speech, the longest in history.
Jokes about the SOTU:
- Trump brought out several special guests, notably the US Men’s Hockey Team:
  “A lot of them hadn’t been there since January 6th.” – Peter Sagal [03:52]
- The panel riffs on the spectacle, noting the President's penchant for fantasy and spin:
  “He might as well be giving the State of Narnia address.” – Alonzo Bowden [04:40]
- Fact-checking fatigue:
  “Fact checkers just said, ‘It’ll be easier to try and find something true.’” – Josh Gondelman [05:11]

2. Survivor Turns 50

[05:27–07:31]

The reality TV staple celebrated an astounding milestone.
Commentary on the formula’s longevity and contestant hardships:
“Where else can you get to watch a 35-year-old orthodontist poop in the ocean?” – Peter Sagal [05:37]
Panelists fantasize about new Survivor settings, including a “Hood Survivor”:
“Just drop some rich white people in the hood… let’s just see what happens.” – Josh Gondelman [07:05]
- Crowd-inspiring mashups suggested like swapping Love Island and Survivor contestants.

3. American Girl Dolls Get “Yassified”

[07:31–09:39]

The iconic dolls’ 40th anniversary is marked by a controversial new look—thinner, smaller, and, as the NYT puts it, “too yassified.”
Panel satire:
- “Ozempican Girl Dolls” (riffing on the weight loss trend) – Alonzo Bowden [09:36]
- Suggestions for new, “grown-up” American Girl dolls including one going through menopause:
  “Did they create a new doll named Peri Menopause?” – Faith Salie [08:43]

4. Weird Science and Technology

[10:14–11:43]

A new wearable gadget that counts… farting.
- It’s dubbed the “Fitbit for farts.” Panelists riff on the intended market and user awareness:
  “Is there anyone who doesn’t know?” – Josh Gondelman [10:59]
- “Gotta get my farts in today!” – Alonzo Bowden [11:12]

5. Viral Travel Hacks: Truth and Satire

Bluff the Listener, [14:07–20:19]

Faith Salie delivers the real viral hack of the week: cleaning underwear in a hotel coffee pot—do not recommend!
- Laundry influencer Patrick Richardson advises:
  “You would be better served washing underwear in the sink with shampoo… than putting it in the Keurig.” [19:47]
Other panelist inventions:
- Faked hotel sob stories for free upgrades
- College kids and truckers using betta fish nips to stay awake

6. Special Guest Interview: Lilly King, Olympic Swimmer

[21:09–30:48]

On campus celebrity: Lilly still gets recognized around Bloomington.
- “It’s weird when you’re trying to take the garbage out in your robe.” – Lilly King [21:28]
Retirement: Recently stepped back from competition after a decade of elite training.
Getting started in swimming:
- “I was really bad at everything else, so that was a good giveaway.” – Lilly King [22:30]
Proposal Story:
- Lilly’s now-husband proposed at the tight-security Olympic trials, on the pool deck, right after a race—and after Lilly heeded a suspicious friend’s advice to remove her swim cap beforehand.
On trash talk and competition:
- “You talk smack on the block. Are they happy you retired?”
  – “Yeah, they should be. I was off the rails there for a couple years.” – Lilly King [27:02]
- Lilly relishes beating younger swimmers:
  “It doesn’t get old ever.” – Lilly King [22:17]
- She confirms she psychs out rivals, even managing mid-race underwater eye contact.
Compared to Dennis Rodman for her poolside antics—she takes it as a compliment!

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

“He might as well be giving the State of Narnia address.” – Alonzo Bowden [04:40]
“This is the first time the fact checkers said, well, it’ll be easier to just try and find something true.” – Josh Gondelman [05:11]
“I think the people who thought they were gonna spend a period of time eating bugs would have a wonderful time making out. And then the hottest 24-year-olds on earth will die within hours.” – Alonzo Bowden on panelist challenge swaps [07:16]
“Ozempican girl dolls.” – Alonzo Bowden [09:36]
“Sorry, I’m trying to keep my numbers up!” – Josh Gondelman, on fart-tracking technology [11:41]
“Just clean your old pair in the coffee pot. What else are you gonna use it for?” – Peter Sagal [17:37]
On psyching out the competition:
- “In one Olympic final, I did make eye contact with another girl off of a turn. So that was, I think, as close as we get in the water. That was pretty crazy.” – Lilly King [26:39]
“I take that as a great compliment.” – Lilly King, on being dubbed the Dennis Rodman of international swimming [27:08]

Game Highlights & Segment Timestamps

"Who's Bill This Time?" (Quiz on the News)

[03:01–09:55]
Covering the SOTU, Survivor’s 50th season, and American Girl dolls makeover.

Weird Wearables

[10:14–11:43]
“Fitbit for farts” comedy riff.

Bluff the Listener: Wildest Travel Hacks

[14:07–20:19]
Faith Salie’s story of washing underwear in the hotel coffee pot turns out to be true. Laundry expert weighs in.

Special Guest: Lilly King Interview

[21:09–30:48]
Stories of athletic beginnings, campus fame, poolside trash talk, her Olympic proposal, and competitive mindset.

Cabinet Cleanout (New Quiz Segment)

[33:15–34:44]
Panelists tackle rapid-fire true/false about wild situations in the Trump cabinet.

Listener Limerick Challenge and Quirky News

[37:34–41:45] Limericks include topics like an Olympic knitter, curling as the new pickleball, and bee orgies as a species-saving strategy.

Lightning Fill-in-the-Blank (Final Quiz)

[43:27–49:03] Panelists race through questions on everything from Epstein files to snowball fights, with play-by-play scorekeeping.

Closing Fun

Panelists play, “What’s the next toy to get a viral update?”
- Hot Wheels with Apple CarPlay, GI Bro with a podcast studio, and microplastic machines “small enough to go straight into your bloodstream.”

Episode Tone & Flavor

The episode maintains Wait Wait’s signature irreverence and rapid-fire wit, driven by Peter Sagal’s playful prodding and the comedic talents of the panel, with plenty of playful teasing and topical sarcasm. Lilly King’s energetic personality fits right in, adding a candid athlete’s edge—and a dose of humble Hoosier pride—to the mix.

For Further Listening

This episode is ideal for anyone who wants:

A smart, silly spin on the week’s headlines
Behind-the-scenes glimpses into elite sports (and competitive trash talk)
Comfort-mirth mashups of news, games, and ongoing panel chemistry