Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! – Episode Featuring Rose Matafeo
Release Date: January 18, 2025
Host: Peter Sagal
Guest: Rose Matafeo
Panelists: Maz Jobrani, Helen Hong, Alzo Slade
Location: Studebaker Theater, Fine Arts Building, Downtown Chicago

Introduction

In the January 18, 2025 episode of NPR's Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!, host Peter Sagal welcomes listeners to another entertaining installment of the popular news quiz show. With Bill Curtis on assignment, Chieoki Ianson steps in as the announcer, setting the stage for a night filled with humor, wit, and insightful commentary.

Peter Sagal [00:42]: "Bill Curtis is off on assignment for a few weeks and we cannot tell you where he is, but if you notice one of the masked singers has a lot of gravitas, you'll know why."

The panel for the evening includes comedian Maz Jobrani, writer and comedian Helen Hong, and Alzo Slade, an Emmy and Peabody Award-winning journalist.

First Contestant: Michelle Kanya

The show kicks off with Michelle Kanya from Knoxville, Tennessee, joining the fun. Michelle, an online athletic trainer and teaching assistant in a blended pre-K classroom, engages in the first round of games hosted by Peter.

Peter Sagal [01:51]: "Michelle, welcome to the show."

Quotations Game

Michelle participates in the "Quotations" segment, where she must identify or explain quotes from this week's news. Success rewards her with a voicemail message of her choice.

First Quote:

Chioki Ianson [02:25]: "Our song YMCA is a global anthem that hopefully helps bring the country together."
Source: Victor Willis, lead singer of the Village People.

The panel humorously debates the true meaning behind "YMCA," with Peter highlighting President Trump's affinity for the song.

Peter Sagal [03:43]: "He loves the song about nachos."
Alzo Slade [04:03]: "They sued him the first time around."

Second Quote:

Chioki Ianson [05:45]: "When you lock things up, you don't sell as many of them."
Source: CEO of Walgreens.

The panelists joke about Walgreens' decision to unlock merchandise to boost sales, playfully suggesting it might help customers smell better.

Maz Jobrani [06:07]: "They're all the same."

Third Quote:

Chioki Ianson [08:11]: "I've seen a quarterback eating a hot dog, but I've never seen anyone do that."
Source: Tom Brady, Fox Sports announcer.

This was in reference to A.J. Brown seen reading a self-help book on the sidelines, leading to humorous speculation about NFL players' off-field activities.

Panel Discussion

Throughout the game, the panelists engage in light-hearted banter, discussing everything from military readiness lyrics to the practicality of unlocked store merchandise.

Helen Hong [03:48]: "Do the gays know that the Village People are not a gay iconic group?"

Alzo Slade [04:05]: "They ran out of money. Yeah, the check is talking."

Second Contestant: Olivia from Washington

Olivia steps up to play the "True or False" game, focusing on unusual expressions of love. She navigates through stories about couples inventing languages and those embedding magnets in their skin to stay connected.

First Story: Helen Hong narrates a couple who created their own language to celebrate love, leading to humorous scenarios on Star Trek.

Helen Hong [15:20]: "Their language, in fact, is so complex and realistic that they were cast as aliens in the latest Star Trek show."

Second Story: Maz Jobrani describes a couple who had magnets implanted to stick together when holding hands.

Maz Jobrani [16:36]: "Sadie Rendu and her fiance Hannah Hansman wanted to get, quote, closer and express their love."

Third Story: Alzo Slade shares about a sustainable couple sharing toothbrushes and bathwater, showcasing extreme commitment to eco-friendly living.

Alzo Slade [17:48]: "Ruby loves when David leaves his used dental floss on the bathroom counter."

Olivia correctly identifies Maz Jobrani's story as the true one, earning a prize for her participation.

Guest Appearance: Rose Matafeo

The highlight of the episode is the arrival of Rose Matafeo, a celebrated comedian from New Zealand. Rose discusses her journey in comedy, starting at age 15, and her new special on Max titled On and On and On.

Rose Matafeo [21:08]: "I started when I was 15, so it was kind of child labor vibes."

Rose humorously recounts wearing a University of Minnesota shirt in her UK-taped special, emphasizing the small-knit community of New Zealand's comedy scene.

Rose Matafeo [24:13]: "I have accidentally worn University Minnesota shirt that I found in the middle of Malmo in Sweden in a secondhand shop."

Couple Game: On and Off Again Relationships

Rose joins Michelle Kanya in a game centered around famous couples with tumultuous relationships. They tackle historical anecdotes, such as Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton's on-again, off-again romance.

First Question: Why did Elizabeth Taylor break off her engagement to another man?

• Answer: A) They were traveling in Asia and he wouldn't let her buy an elephant to bring home.

Peter Sagal [27:52]: "It was the elephant."

Second Question: How did Ryan O'Neill and Farrah Fawcett's relationship begin?

• Answer: C) When Fawcett's husband, Lee Majors, was away filming and asked O'Neill to just be a pal and check in on her.

Third Question: To whom was Glenn Wolf's 31st marriage?

• Answer: B) The person who held the woman's record for most marriages in a lifetime.

Rose answers two out of three correctly, securing a victory for contestant Stephen Ward.

Contestant: Lucy from Pittsburgh

Lucy takes on the "Limerick Challenge," where she must fill in missing words from limericks based on recent news events.

First Limerick:

"I've got hips that would make any doula whoop and a waistline. So fine, you'll need a jeweler's loop. So I'm great at a sport that needs no gyms or courts. See, my body is perfect for hoops."

Answer: Hula hoop

Second Limerick:

"In most arcade machines, there's this flaw. A stuffed bear is the best you will draw. But here, you might snag a sweet Hermes bag. Grab some luxury treats with our claw."

Answer: Claw

Third Limerick:

"In a field that they don't know so well, science winners go wild and go tell they see glowing raccoons and hear ghosts by full moon. Their brains rot once they win the Nobel."

Answer: Nobelitis

Lucy impressively fills in all three gaps correctly, earning accolades from the panel.

Lightning Fill in the Blank

The episode culminates with the "Lightning Fill in the Blank" game, where panelists race against the clock to complete as many sentences as possible.

Examples of Blanks Filled:

• "On Thursday, Benjamin Netanyahu delayed a vote to approve the ceasefire in Gaza." [44:38]
• "Following an encouraging report on inflation, the Dow Jones surged 700, 103 points this week." [44:46]
• "Sony announced that soon the PlayStation console won't just have great graphics and sound. Players will also experience smell." [35:22]
• "After a woman in Australia attempted to burn down a restaurant, she had to flee the scene because she lit her own pants on fire." [45:25]

Helen Hong leads with six correct answers, followed by Maz Jobrani securing the championship with a total of 15 points.

Conclusion and Winner Announcement

Peter Sagal wraps up the episode by congratulating Maz Jobrani on his victory and thanking Rose Matafeo for her delightful participation. The show concludes with panelists sharing their predictions for unusual activities NFL players might engage in on the sidelines, maintaining the episode's humorous and engaging tone.

Maz Jobrani [50:24]: "They're going to be playing Wordle on those little tablets that they’re supposed to be reviewing plays on."

Helen Hong [50:15]: "Hating."

The episode underscores the blend of humor, current events, and interactive games that make Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! a beloved staple in NPR's lineup.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Peter Sagal [00:42]: "Bill Curtis is off on assignment for a few weeks and we cannot tell you where he is..."

• Helen Hong [15:20]: "Their language... is so complex and realistic that they were cast as aliens in the latest Star Trek show."

• Maz Jobrani [16:36]: "Sadie Rendu and her fiance Hannah Hansman wanted to get, quote, closer..."

• Rose Matafeo [21:08]: "I started when I was 15, so it was kind of child labor vibes."

• Peter Sagal [35:22]: "Sony says that the technology, when it is introduced, will engage scent to fully immerse you into the world of the story."

This episode of Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! masterfully intertwines humor with current events, guest insights, and interactive listener participation, ensuring a memorable experience for both regular listeners and newcomers alike.