I stumbled into something that provided clarity on the political divide that plagues our modern times.

Yesterday, I had a conversation with somebody who labeled himself as a conservative even though he claimed to disagree with everything conservatives stand for.

It occurred to me that there's a collective mental block in our society that prevents people from calling themselves liberal. It's as if they can’t see themselves that way even though they personally disagree with virtually everything that falls under the umbrella of modern conservatism.

The person I was talking to said he was a conservative even though he'd voted for Democrats for the past five or six election cycles.

I replied, “Well, what is it about being a conservative that makes you identify with them? Is it the anti-LGBTQ+ hatred? Is it the hatred against immigrants? Is it the unwillingness to have free lunches at schools? Is it the lies about fiscal responsibility even though they're the ones who give massive tax breaks to the wealthy and inflate the debt? You tell me. What is it that conservatives stand for that make you identify with them?”

He couldn't answer.

Why is the American public so controlled that they fear a label more than the consequences of their ill-considered actions?

The person I was talking to came back and said, “Well, I'm not anti-LGBTQ+.”

That statement was completely baffling to me. I asked, “Well, explain to me how you can call yourself a conservative then. Being anti-LGBTQ+ is a fundamental element of the modern conservative ideology. They are clearly anti-LGBTQ+. They don't try to hide it. And when you say you are a conservative, it's the equivalent of declaring yourself to be homophobic as far as I’m concerned.”

He insisted that he wasn't homophobic, but something seemed to prevent him from engaging with the truth of what I was trying to say. Why is it that people who vote for hatred believe they can exempt themselves from the consequences of their actions?

When you do things that hurt people, you're responsible for that pain. This is irrefutable.

Being anti-LGBTQ+ is not a small part of the conservative ideology. It's almost laughable that anyone could seriously believe they can call themselves conservative without having it mean that they're anti-LGBTQ+. Yet, here we are.

It's similar to when people say they don't like many things about the current presidential administration, but they still voted for it. I'm curious about the things they do like. What are the positives? I don't see any. Please educate me.

I've heard a lot of people say things like, “I don't approve of his insults. I don't approve of his locker room talk.” But then they support him anyway. They give him their vote. They give him their money.

There are many people that when you push them on the issues, you discover that they strongly disagree with everything conservatives stand for. But they still insist on calling themselves conservatives. They'll deny the reality of what modern conservatives actually stand for. They demand absurd exemptions for themselves. They claim they voted for tax cuts for the middle class even though those tax cuts never come.

Or they'll say that the people doing awful things aren't “real conservatives” even though they do it again and again and again.

What is it about the empty label of “conservative” that makes people inclined to affiliate themselves with all the awful things that conservatives do?

Why is there such a resistance to words like “liberal” or “progressive” or “humanitarian” or “compassion?”

Today, I am simply not trustful of conservatives. I’ve been fooled enough. I don't know what they believe. I don't know what they stand for. I've met too many who say they are going to do one thing, and then they turn around and do the opposite. I've met too many who are willing to stab me in the back and then they somehow try to insist that's not what they did.

I would respect them more if they admitted they took actions to hurt me. At least then they'd be honest about something.

This happened with my conservative cousin. He knew my kids. He claimed to love my kids. My wife is an immigrant. So I said, “Look, conservative hate rhetoric against immigrants is leading to violence against my kids.”

He replied, “Well, I don't want your kids to face any violence.”

So, I thought we had an understanding.

But then, after the election, he called me after a few drinks and let it slip that he in fact voted for violence against my kids. He voted conservative. Why did he do that? What did he gain?

All I can conclude is that there's something inherent to the empty label of “conservative” that my cousin values more than the wellbeing of my family. He values that label more than his relationship with me and my kids.

He’s gone now, we’ll never talk again. I hope he likes what he got in that trade. To me, it seems like he got nothing.

Whenever I've pushed conservatives on this subject, they always insist that they don't have anything against these groups. “I'm not anti-immigrant. I'm not anti-LGBTQ+,” they say.

Why do they think they can say that when they vote against the interests of so many people? You don't get to pick and choose the consequences of your actions. You don't get to take credit for the good and deny the bad. But the strangest part is that I don't see any good. What is the good that they think justifies their actions?

What is it that conservatives think they stand for? Say it in plain language, and then we can work together to figure out how to collectively vote to make those good things happen but without sacrificing innocent people.

Let's keep the positives and remove all the horrible crimes against humanity. What is it about being a conservative that you agree with? I suspect that the things you think of as conservative are not represented by the modern conservative movement.

Let's process this. Let's take a scientific approach. Let's put aside our disagreements, roll up our sleeves, leave the justifications behind, and come to a functional compromise.

It doesn't make sense that you run away from something just because some shadowy entity slaps the word “liberal” on it. Why are you so controlled by the power of that word?

Maybe it's because the word is constantly demonized by the American media even as conservatives can never do any wrong. Did you ever think about that? Maybe you've been indoctrinated or groomed to be fearful of a label. Maybe you're completely under control?

We need rural communities to start accepting the label of liberal and recognize that the ideology might provide a pathway to prosperity and decency and human dignity.

The conservative ideology doesn't get you there. You're broke and you've been a conservative your whole life. It doesn't work. You can't continue to turn a blind eye to all the horrors that are happening under the label you’ve been tricked into taking on as your identity.

You’re an adult. You get to determine your identity.

I contend that the things you think of as conservative are not represented by the modern conservative movement. You're voting against yourself.

It makes some sense if you're from another era. Perhaps you remember what it meant to be a conservative fifty years ago when Eisenhower ran on the same platform as AOC. That, at least, makes sense. But why not then embrace AOC today? Why not call yourself a progressive?

You have greater loyalty to the word than to what the word stands for. That makes no sense.

Why are you so controlled?

We have to accept that these terms change with time. You could walk around with a swastika on your chest and claim it's an ancient symbol of love. But it's irresponsible and borderline delusional to pretend you don't recognize that in modern times the swastika has become a symbol of hatred.

Claims of ignorance don't justify the pain you leave in your wake.

It would be absurd to try and say that you agree with the “positive” aspects of the swastika, and you don't recognize the negatives. That's not the power that you have. People look upon a swastika and recoil. They don't see it as a symbol of an ancient history that is now gone. They rightfully see it as a symbol of hate, and if you wear one you are guilty of normalizing hatred.

The same thing is true when you claim you're a conservative.

Conservatives are people who oppose offering lunch to struggling kids at public schools.

Come on!

What's one good thing that they stand for? Stop for a moment and ask yourself why it is that you insist on bearing the burden of their shame?

Why claim that label and subject yourself to all the hatred and malice that it brings? Why not be a force of good instead?

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Why Are You Not Embarrassed to Call Yourself a Conservative?