Podcast Summary: "Are Old Women Really Irrelevant?"

Podcast Information:

• Title: We Can Do Hard Things
• Hosts: Glennon Doyle, Abby Wambach, and Amanda Doyle
• Release Date: January 21, 2025
• Description: In this episode, the trio delves into the societal perceptions of older women, exploring themes of relevance, invisibility, and intergenerational connections. Through heartfelt discussions and personal anecdotes, they challenge the notion that aging renders women irrelevant, advocating for a more inclusive and appreciative view of older women in society.

1. Introduction to the Episode

The episode begins with a brief segue into the main topic after skipping promotional segments. The hosts welcome their audience warmly, emphasizing the familial and supportive atmosphere of their discussions.

Notable Quote:

• Abby Wambach [02:51]: "Our favorite episodes are the ones where it's more family meeting vibes. Right? It's like the three of us and some pod squatters."

2. Listener Question: Georgia's Concern About Irrelevance

A listener named Georgia poses a poignant question about the societal perception of women aged 40 to 65, expressing fears of becoming irrelevant and overlooked. She desires a future where older women are integrated and celebrated rather than sidelined.

Notable Quote:

• Georgia [04:07]: "It seems like women from 40 to 65 are considered irrelevant in the society. How do we integrate them into our world?"

3. Hosts' Reactions and Personal Reflections

The hosts respond empathetically to Georgia's concerns, sharing personal stories and insights that resonate with the theme of aging and relevance.

Abby’s Story on Relevance: Abby recounts a metaphor from Lauren Groff's "The Matrix," where a uniquely shaped tree remains untouched by loggers due to its non-conformity. She likens herself and other older women to this "Old Survivor" tree—misunderstood yet resilient and free from societal expectations.

Notable Quotes:

• Abby Wambach [06:16]: "We do not want to be integrated back into your world that we just narrowly escaped with our lives."
• Abby Wambach [14:30]: "Once you hit 50... it's a superpower... to finally be left the fuck alone and do whatever the hell I want to do."

4. Societal Perceptions and Biological Influences

The discussion transitions into how societal standards and biological changes like menopause impact women's sense of relevance and self-worth. The hosts explore how hormonal shifts can lead to a decreased inclination towards people-pleasing, fostering autonomy and self-focus.

Notable Quotes:

• Amanda Doyle [16:35]: "We have lost the intergenerational aspect... we don't have that wisdom being passed down and passed up."
• Glennon Doyle [16:35]: "A lot of women are going through perimenopause, menopause, post menopause... make you give less shits."

5. Intergenerational Relationships and Media Representation

Amanda emphasizes the importance of intergenerational relationships, advocating for stronger connections between younger and older women to foster mutual learning and support. The hosts critique media representations that portray older women as wistful or disengaged, arguing for more authentic and diverse portrayals.

Notable Quotes:

• Amanda Doyle [18:27]: "If all Georgia is seeing in media is what the media wants people to think of older women... it's a damn shame."
• Abby Wambach [22:52]: "To live outside of the male gaze, even in moments in this country as a woman, is a fucking miracle."

6. Personal Experiences with Visibility and Identity

Abby shares her personal journey of navigating visibility as a queer woman, highlighting how stepping out of traditional societal expectations has transformed her interactions and self-perception. This transition underscores the broader theme of redefining relevance beyond imposed standards.

Notable Quotes:

• Abby Wambach [22:59]: "When I'm with Abby, I have a different experience... knowing I'm queer changes the energy around me."
• Glennon Doyle [21:45]: "Maybe if not for all the money in the world that I go back to 20."

7. Transition to Listener Engagement: Casey's Question on Processing Emotions

The hosts address another listener, Casey, who inquires about the meaning and practice of processing emotions—a topic closely tied to the episode's theme of self-awareness and emotional resilience.

Notable Quote:

• Casey [27:29]: "What do you think that actually means how do you process emotion?"

8. Deep Dive into Emotional Processing

Amanda leads a comprehensive discussion on emotional processing, breaking it down into recognizing, experiencing, and reflecting upon emotions. They share personal anecdotes to illustrate the challenges and transformative power of fully engaging with one's emotions.

Notable Quotes:

• Amanda Doyle [33:05]: "Emotion is a wave... you have to just keep riding it through."
• Abby Wambach [37:25]: "When you realize, let me get out of the story and into my body... you can actually just physically ride the wave of the emotion without the story attached."

9. Practical Strategies for Emotion Processing

The hosts offer practical advice on how to process emotions, such as setting aside dedicated time for reflection, using music as a therapeutic tool, and journaling to decipher underlying messages behind emotions. They emphasize the importance of staying present and allowing emotions to flow naturally rather than suppressing them.

Notable Quotes:

• Amanda Doyle [28:16]: "It's about recognizing it and allowing the wave to come."
• Abby Wambach [43:38]: "Find a couple of processing things, music, walks, whatever it is, and then write down your noticings."

10. Encouraging Listener Participation and Community Building

Concluding the Q&A, the hosts encourage listeners to engage more deeply by submitting their own questions and sharing how the podcast has influenced their lives. They outline mechanisms for listener interaction, reinforcing the podcast’s role as a supportive community.

Notable Quotes:

• Glennon Doyle [57:32]: "Anybody else working on their shadow side? I would like some freaking pod squatters who are on my side here."
• Abby Wambach [58:11]: "If this podcast means something to you, it would mean so much to us if you'd be willing to take 30 seconds to do these three things."

11. Closing Remarks and Call to Action

The episode wraps up with the hosts reiterating their invitation for listeners to connect, share their stories, and participate in future discussions. They emphasize the importance of community support in navigating life’s challenges.

Notable Quote:

• Abby Wambach [59:31]: "We love you so much and we will see you next time and we will see you in the inbox and on the voicemails."

Key Takeaways:

1. Challenging Societal Norms: The episode powerfully challenges the notion that aging diminishes a woman's relevance, advocating for a societal shift towards valuing older women’s experiences and wisdom.

2. Embracing Autonomy: Through personal stories, the hosts illustrate how embracing the changes that come with age, such as hormonal shifts, can lead to greater autonomy and self-acceptance.

3. Intergenerational Connections: Emphasizing the loss of intergenerational relationships, the hosts argue for stronger bonds between younger and older women to foster mutual growth and understanding.

4. Emotional Resilience: The detailed discussion on processing emotions underscores the importance of emotional awareness and healthy expression as tools for personal and relational well-being.

5. Community and Support: The podcast fosters a sense of community, encouraging listeners to engage, share, and support one another in navigating life’s challenges.

Audience Benefits: Listeners gain valuable insights into the societal pressures faced by older women and are encouraged to rethink and reshape their perspectives on aging and relevance. The practical advice on emotional processing offers tools for personal growth, making the episode both enlightening and actionable for those seeking to live more authentically and connectedly.

This episode of We Can Do Hard Things serves as a compassionate and thought-provoking exploration of aging, relevance, and emotional well-being, empowering women to embrace their journeys with courage and authenticity.