We Can Do Hard Things: How to Stay Soft AND Strong – Detailed Summary

Episode Release Date: July 3, 2025

Hosts: Glennon Doyle, Abby Wambach, and Amanda Doyle

Introduction and Event Context [05:34 – 08:54]

The episode kicks off with Amanda Doyle welcoming listeners to a special virtual event celebrating the launch of their book, "We Can Do Hard Things." Reflecting on the book’s success, Amanda shares heartfelt gratitude towards their community, emphasizing that the book represents a collective wisdom movement away from traditional self-help paradigms.

Amanda Doyle [06:00]:
"We're just deeply, deeply grateful. I'm feeling that today. I'm feeling so much gratitude, honestly, that anybody is still listening to anything that I'm saying. Supposed to be exhausting."

She praises the ongoing support, highlighting the book’s consistent presence on bestseller lists and the positive feedback from readers engaging deeply with its content.

Celebrating the Book Launch [08:34 – 11:29]

The conversation transitions to acknowledging the team behind the book’s publication. Amanda expresses immense appreciation for Dial Press, Whitney Frick, and other team members who played pivotal roles in bringing the book to fruition.

Amanda Doyle [07:34]:
"Thank you so much for doing life with us, for listening to the pod, for caring about the work we do."

The hosts then delve into the central theme of the book—addressing the complexity of life by categorizing problems into manageable segments, fostering a sense of community and shared experience.

Listener Q&A: Building Trust and Forgiveness [09:31 – 16:20]

The heart of the episode features a listener-submitted question: "How do you build trust again once it's been lost? How do you forgive someone who has betrayed you?" The discussion reveals diverse perspectives:

• Amanda Doyle emphasizes the internal journey of regaining trust within oneself before addressing external relationships.

• Abby Wambach reflects on personal accountability and the importance of self-forgiveness as a foundation for healing.

Abby Wambach [15:56]:
"There is oftentimes a moment where I might have not said something, where I might not have been brave enough to come forward with my feelings... And so, yeah, I think forgiveness at the end of it... It's about the forgiveness of yourself."

• Glennon Doyle explores the concept of forgiveness as a directional, forward-moving process rather than a cyclical one tied to past grievances.

Amanda Doyle [15:56]:
"Forgiveness is directional. It's a decision to not in your mind and life be reaching backwards to something old... It's just a freedom of like, onward."

The discussion underscores that forgiveness often begins with self-compassion and recognizing one's own role in personal growth and healing.

Stepparenting Challenges and Love [21:04 – 29:08]

A heartfelt segment unfolds as Carrie, a listener, shares her experiences as a stepmom navigating a blended family within a LGBTQ+ context. Amanda and Abby provide empathetic responses, acknowledging the unique struggles and emotional complexities involved.

Amanda Doyle [23:40]:
"With every bone in my body, know that Carrie's kids, even though it might be tricky and weird for some years, are the luckiest freaking kids on the Earth."

Abby reflects on her own journey with step-parenting, touching on insecurities and the deep love that underpins their blended family dynamics.

Abby Wambach [25:42]:
"I have shown up and it's been absolutely, by far the most rewarding and beautiful thing in the whole wide world."

This dialogue highlights the resilience and unconditional love required to foster strong, supportive relationships in blended families.

Personal Growth Post-Cancer Diagnosis [29:06 – 33:41]

Listeners share personal stories about life-altering diagnoses and the ensuing transformations. One speaker discusses the impact of a cancer diagnosis on personal change, juxtaposing external expectations of sudden transformation with the reality of gradual, intentional growth.

Speaker [30:15]:
"I have started changing intentionally through small micro changes to try to chase my peace."

The conversation shifts to the notion that true change stems from a deliberate desire for improvement rather than external pressures, emphasizing self-awareness and intentionality in personal development.

Managing Anxiety and Depression [37:10 – 43:31]

Claire, another listener, opens up about her experience with SSRIs and the challenges of transitioning to a state of stability and "being okay." The hosts discuss the complexities of mental health management, the stigma around being comfortable, and the continuous journey towards self-acceptance.

Amanda Doyle [38:15]:
"I am just a huge. Anybody who is feeling half human and who is struggling and who feels like they're depressed or is in a serious spiral of anxiety, like, you go to your doctor and you tell them what they need."

Abby and Amanda share personal anecdotes about their own mental health journeys, reinforcing the importance of seeking help and redefining one’s relationship with anxiety and depression.

Rapid Fire: Personal Insights and Joys [43:05 – 47:50]

The hosts engage in a light-hearted rapid-fire segment, answering quick questions to reveal personal joys and coping mechanisms. Topics range from favorite foods to personal theme songs, providing a glimpse into the hosts' lives beyond their roles as authors and advocates.

Abby Wambach [43:27]:
"Banana pudding. I'm about to eat tonight."

Amanda Doyle [44:08]:
"I'm on this crazy new wellness plan that is called eating food. And it is making me so happy."

This segment adds warmth and relatability, showcasing the hosts' human side and their ways of finding joy amidst life's challenges.

Closing Remarks and Community Appreciation [47:50 – 48:19]

In the closing moments, Amanda and Abby extend their gratitude to independent bookstores, librarians, and the broader community for their unwavering support. They reinforce the podcast's mission of tackling life's hard things collectively, fostering a sense of unity and mutual support.

Amanda Doyle [48:05]:
"We're grateful for everyone in the show."

The episode concludes with a reaffirmation of the podcast’s core message:

Amanda Doyle & Abby Wambach [48:19]:
"We can do hard things."

Key Takeaways

• Self-Forgiveness: Healing begins with forgiving oneself, which paves the way for restoring trust in others.

• Collective Wisdom: Sharing and discussing personal struggles fosters a supportive community, making individual challenges feel less isolating.

• Resilience in Relationships: Navigating blended families and step-parenting requires immense love, patience, and adaptability.

• Intentional Change: Personal growth is a deliberate process, not necessarily triggered by external events but by an internal desire for peace and improvement.

• Mental Health Acceptance: Embracing stability and "being okay" is a valid and courageous step in mental health journeys.

Notable Quotes

• Amanda Doyle [06:00]:
  "We're just deeply, deeply grateful."

• Abby Wambach [15:56]:
  "It's about the forgiveness of yourself."

• Amanda Doyle [15:56]:
  "Forgiveness is directional. It's a decision to not in your mind and life be reaching backwards to something old..."

• Amanda Doyle [23:40]:
  "With every bone in my body, know that Carrie's kids, even though it might be tricky and weird for some years, are the luckiest freaking kids on the Earth."

• Amanda Doyle [38:15]:
  "Anybody who is feeling half human and who is struggling and who feels like they're depressed or is in a serious spiral of anxiety, like, you go to your doctor and you tell them what they need."

This episode of We Can Do Hard Things offers a profound exploration of trust, forgiveness, personal growth, and the strength found in community support. Through candid conversations and shared experiences, the hosts and their guests illuminate pathways to navigating life’s inherent challenges with softness and strength.