Podcast Summary: We Can Do Hard Things
Episode: In Honor of All Survivors: Tarana Burke (Part 1)
Host: Glennon Doyle, Abby Wambach, Amanda Doyle
Guest: Tarana Burke
Release Date: February 17, 2026
Episode Overview
This episode is a deeply honest and hopeful conversation with Tarana Burke, activist, advocate, and founder of the MeToo movement. The discussion honors survivors of abuse—particularly in light of ongoing revelations about Jeffrey Epstein and the systemic failures that protected him—and centers on Tarana Burke’s life, her memoir Unbound, and the lived realities, challenges, and resilience of survivors, especially Black and brown girls and women. The episode explores trauma, community, faith, liberation, and the co-existence of pain and joy.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
Introduction & Context (00:00–04:00)
- Solidarity with Survivors: Amanda contextualizes the conversation in light of current events involving Jeffrey Epstein, government cover-ups, and justice for survivors.
- Glennon’s Admiration: Glennon expresses profound respect for Tarana’s work:
“There will never be anyone whose work is more important to us and to the world than the person we’re interviewing today.” (01:32) Glennon Doyle
The Power and Pain of Rules for Girls (04:38–11:21)
- Origins of Tarana’s Advocacy: Discussion begins with Tarana’s own experience as a survivor of child sexual assault; she reflects on childhood confusion, shame, and the internalization of responsibility.
- The Role of Rules: Tarana explains how societal and parental rules create a sense of self-blame in girls when abuse occurs:
“What adults neglect to do is they neglect to say if one of these rules are broken...it’s not your fault. If somebody breaks that rule, it's always the adult’s fault.” (09:06) Tarana Burke
- Silence and Isolation: How unspoken and spoken rules keep survivors from disclosing abuse, and create lifelong anxiety and performance.
Community, Protection, and Double Binds (14:32–20:21)
- Family Support—And Its Costs: Tarana recounts the dilemma of having supportive family and the fear of consequences for loved ones (e.g., violence or incarceration):
“What that did was now make me responsible for them… Now I’m responsible for the adults.” (17:08) Tarana Burke
- Double Binds in Black and Brown Communities: Amanda highlights how survivors must choose between protecting themselves and protecting their communities—a cycle that silences.
- Compounded Trauma: The conversation details how additional layers—immigration status, policing, racism—make disclosure especially fraught for Black and brown girls.
Church, Confession, and Early Faith (20:40–29:18)
- Catholicism as Both Burden and Solace: Tarana reflects on her childhood faith—how confession was both a source of relief and contributed to shame:
“There is something liberating about getting that—getting truth out of your body… confessing not to the world, even if it’s to God, if it’s to yourself… There is something. The part that felt liberating, I feel like I held onto that and it helped me be a truth-teller.” (32:36) Tarana Burke
- Comic Relief: The hosts and Tarana laugh about the childhood anxiety and rituals associated with confession (“I was like, in choosing to do wrong and failing to do good, and then…” (22:06)).
- Balancing Faith and Liberation: Her grandfather introduced her to Black liberation texts as a “sacrament,” which, combined with faith, became the foundation for her activism and worldview.
Truth-telling and the Liberation of Speaking Out (32:36–35:38)
- First Self-Disclosure: Tarana movingly describes the first time she told her truth to herself in the mirror:
“I forced myself to say it to look at myself while I said it. And I was like, oh, look at me. Whew, I’m still here.” (34:18) Tarana Burke
- The Power of Confession: The episode draws connections between confession as a faith practice and truth-telling as a liberatory act for survivors.
Coping, Performance, and Rage (35:38–41:19)
- Adolescent Struggles: Tarana speaks about expressing pain through anger and “performance”—the lack of space for vulnerability for Black girls:
“Girls like me didn’t get the air to cry, the air to release our shame, the air to say, ‘I don’t want to fight you.' ” (36:54) Glennon Doyle reading Tarana’s memoir
- Lack of Compassion for Black Girls:
“Not a single adult says: what happened to your heart? …You just go from whatever small person to this now adult, mini-adult. I’m only held accountable for the consequences of things that happened to me, but not the root cause.” (39:03) Tarana Burke
Saving Grace of Representation and Imagination (41:19–44:11)
- Maya Angelou as Confidante: Tarana recalls reading I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings and realizing she wasn’t alone:
“It was the first time I ever realized a little girl like her could have gone through what I went through. …She was my confidant. I no longer felt alone.” (41:19) Amanda reading Tarana’s memoir
- Witnessing Black Women's Joy and Pain: The moment of seeing Maya Angelou perform “Phenomenal Woman” sparks a pivotal question:
“If what I saw was real, how could a body that holds that kind of pain also hold joy?” (43:42) Glennon Doyle reading Tarana’s memoir
Embracing Both Joy and Pain (44:11–52:42)
- Coexistence of Emotions: Inspired by Maya Angelou, Tarana begins charting her own “joy journal”:
“I felt like if I can quantify it [joy], then I don’t have to afford what they’re selling, because I got it.” (49:45) Tarana Burke
- Liberation from Commercialized Self-help: Tarana critiques self-help messages that suggest joy must be purchased or is reserved for the privileged, affirming that marginalized communities can and do experience joy—on their own terms.
- Naming Joy: Tarana urges women, especially Black women, to claim joy unapologetically, despite being told otherwise:
“I like to be fucking loud, and it brings me joy.” (51:40) Tarana Burke
Sexuality, Trauma, and Safe Exploration (52:42–59:13)
- Exploring Sexuality After Trauma: Tarana recalls the profound impact of a platonic but sensual friendship in college, which allowed her to explore joy and safety in her body:
“It allowed me to understand my body as a sexual being, as a person who can feel pleasure. And that pleasure does not have to be balanced with trauma of some sort.” (58:12) Tarana Burke
- The Loss of Her First Love: Tarana shares that the friend who enabled this healthy growth has since passed away—a moving and vulnerable moment.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
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On Responsibility & the Consequences of Speaking Out:
“Not only am I responsible for my own protection of my body, but now I’m responsible for the adults. …I want to tell, because I know something is not right here, but if I do, my dad is going to jail, and it would be my fault.” (17:07) Tarana Burke
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On the Power of Representation:
“To my 12 year old self, Maya Angelou was just another name on my mother’s bookshelf… She was a lady who wrote a book that shared my secrets. She was my confidant. I no longer felt alone.” (41:19) Amanda reading Tarana’s memoir
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On the Double Bind for Black/Brown Survivors:
“The protection provided by your community is what saves you, but the need to protect your community is what silences you.” (18:59) Amanda Doyle
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On Naming and Documenting Joy:
“I wanted to document what felt like joy because I felt like if I can quantify it, then I don’t have to afford what they’re selling because I got it.” (49:45) Tarana Burke
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On Safe Sexual Exploration:
“It was the first time in my life that I got to safely explore my sexuality with no demands on my body.” (53:18) Amanda reading Tarana’s memoir
Key Timestamps
- 00:00–01:16 — Introduction & episode context; aligning with survivors and truth
- 01:16–02:46 — Glennon’s emotional framing of Tarana as a hero
- 04:30–06:15 — Beginning of Tarana's story and impact of sexual assault
- 08:24–11:21 — Cultural rules, self-blame, and the harm to girls
- 14:32–20:04 — The double bind of community protection vs. personal safety
- 20:40–24:22 — Catholic confession and its complex effects
- 29:18–32:36 — The relationship between confession, faith, and truth-telling
- 34:18–35:38 — The liberating experience of self-disclosure
- 35:38–41:19 — Loneliness, performance, and coping as a teen survivor
- 41:19–44:11 — The saving grace of Maya Angelou and seeing oneself in literature
- 44:11–52:42 — Documenting and claiming joy alongside pain
- 52:42–59:13 — Safe sexuality after trauma, and honoring a lost friend
Tone & Language
The episode is raw, emotional, compassionate, and often punctuated with laughter between the hosts and Tarana. It moves fluidly from serious analysis to storytelling, seamlessly weaving advocacy, cultural critique, and personal anecdote.
Summary: Takeaways for Listeners
This episode offers a powerful testament to the complexity and resilience of survivors—highlighting not only the pain but also the indignity of blame, the burdens of silence, and the absolute necessity of joy and truth-telling. Tarana Burke’s story, and her voice, bring both comfort and challenge, illuminating the systems that perpetuate harm, the essential role of community and faith, and the radical act of claiming joy and agency—even, and especially, after trauma.
