We Can Do Hard Things: Episode Summary - "The Advice That Changed Our Lives"

Release Date: October 30, 2024

In the poignant episode titled "The Advice That Changed Our Lives," hosts Glennon Doyle, Abby Wambach, and Amanda Doyle delve deep into the transformative guidance they've received throughout their lives. This episode serves as a heartfelt exploration of personal growth, self-sovereignty, and the intricate dynamics of offering advice, especially to the next generation.

1. Embracing Self-Sovereignty

Amanda Doyle introduces a profound shift in her perspective inspired by Justina Blakeney. Sharing a memorable lunch encounter, Amanda narrates how Justina redefined her understanding of autonomy and decision-making.

• Timestamp [04:15] - Amanda Doyle:
  "Justina said, 'No sorrys. It's self sovereignty.' And she proceeds to tell me about how she has recently decided that the decisions that she is making that make her feel better are understood to her to be from a place of self sovereignty..."

Abby Wambach enthusiastically supports this concept, highlighting the blend of self-care and communal good.

• Timestamp [07:17] - Abby Wambach:
  "Justina's very queenly. Everyone should just go to her Instagram at Jungle O and just see how amazing this is."

The hosts discuss how self-sovereignty empowers individuals to make choices that benefit not just themselves but also their "realm"—a metaphor for their immediate communities and loved ones.

• Timestamp [08:24] - Amanda Doyle:
  "You can choose yourself or you can choose your people. And so I choose my people."

2. Navigating Parental Advice on Love

A compelling dialogue unfolds as Abby and Amanda share their contrasting approaches to advising their children about love and relationships.

Abby's Perspective:

Abby emphasizes fostering an open-hearted approach in her children, encouraging them to embrace love without fear of heartbreak.

• Timestamp [25:35] - Abby Wambach:
  "I want to hold you by the shoulders and say, there is nothing wrong with you. And perhaps the only thing that has ever been wrong with us is the wild wrong idea that there is something wrong with us."

Amanda's Perspective:

In contrast, Amanda shares her hesitance to fully endorse her children's romantic pursuits, stemming from a place of protective caution.

• Timestamp [24:10] - Abby Wambach:
  "I was like, oh, isn't it cute and funny...you can't do that."

This honest exchange underscores the delicate balance parents strive to maintain between protecting their children and encouraging their personal growth.

3. Inspirational Advice from Sara Bareilles

Guest Sara Bareilles shares a transformative moment with Carole King that encapsulates the essence of overcoming self-doubt and embracing one's true potential.

• Timestamp [42:54] - Sara Bareilles:
  "Carole just put her arm around my waist, and she's like, 'Get out of your own way. Go do the thing. Just like, get out of your own way. They already love you.'"

Sara's recounting of performing alongside Carole King at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame serves as a motivational beacon for listeners to trust in their abilities and step into their greatness.

4. Heartfelt Wisdom from Mrs. Tina Yalen

The episode takes a nostalgic turn as the hosts reflect on the invaluable lessons imparted by Tina Yalen, Amanda and Abby's seventh-grade government teacher.

• Timestamp [48:12] - Tina Yalen (Voicemail):
  "There is nothing more worthy of delight than when people you love give you their time. I feel this delight with many of my former students...Authentic, honest, thoughtful, insightful, curious, kind and funny."

Abby shares a touching story about Tina's unwavering support during a pivotal moment in her life, emphasizing the enduring impact teachers can have.

• Timestamp [45:45] - Abby Wambach:
  "Mrs. Yalen said, 'You're already doing that [creating a community]. What could be worse than a church with walls? When you have a church without walls.'"

Tina's voicemail encapsulates the episode's overarching theme: the profound influence of genuine, heartfelt advice from those who believe in us.

5. Reflections and Closing Thoughts

As the episode draws to a close, Glennon Doyle and Abby Wambach reflect on the diverse pieces of advice shared, acknowledging the complexity of interpreting and applying guidance in one's life journey.

• Timestamp [43:20] - Amy Bleakney:
  "The more you give, the more you get. It's so cliche, but it's really so true."

The trio reiterates the importance of surrounding oneself with a supportive community and remaining open to evolving one's understanding of truth and personal growth.

Notable Quotes

• Glennon Doyle at [36:16]:
  "It's about being the expert of you and just doing that whether or not people understand it."

• Amanda Doyle at [41:22]:
  "Responsible means able to respond. Responsible doesn't mean coming with your script..."

• Abby Wambach at [37:28]:
  "I know the world is gonna teach us. Every heartbreak of my life was the most important lesson I needed to learn."

Conclusion

"The Advice That Changed Our Lives" is a deeply introspective episode that invites listeners to ponder the wisdom that shapes their lives. Through personal anecdotes, guest insights, and heartfelt conversations, Glennon Doyle, Abby Wambach, and Amanda Doyle underscore the resilience required to navigate life's challenges. This episode not only celebrates the guidance received but also empowers listeners to seek and value the advice that aligns with their authentic selves.

Whether you're navigating personal growth, parenting challenges, or seeking inspiration, this episode offers relatable and transformative insights to help you "Do Hard Things" with courage and authenticity.