We Can Do Hard Things: Episode Summary
"Why You Can’t Pay Attention—And How to Get It Back with Dr. Amishi Jha"
Release Date: June 10, 2025
Hosted by Glennon Doyle, Abby Wambach, and Amanda Doyle, this episode delves deep into the complexities of human attention and offers scientifically-backed strategies to reclaim focus and presence in our daily lives.
1. Introduction to the Episode
The episode kicks off with Glennon Doyle and Abby Wambach expressing their excitement about welcoming Dr. Amishi Jha, a renowned brain scientist, to discuss the pervasive issue of attention in our modern lives. The hosts set the stage by highlighting the common feeling of being overwhelmed and distracted, emphasizing the episode's goal to explore solutions for enhancing attention.
2. Defining Attention
Abby Wambach initiates the conversation by sharing her personal perspective on attention, emphasizing its role in building meaningful relationships:
"Attention is the gateway and maybe even our highest form of love. Attention is also what we use to crush it. Attention is also what we use to understand the world around us." (05:08)
Dr. Amishi Jha elaborates on this by explaining the evolutionary significance of attention as a survival mechanism:
"Attention allows us to prioritize some information over other information so we can fully understand that." (08:11)
3. The Three Systems of Attention
Dr. Jha introduces a comprehensive framework for understanding attention, categorizing it into three distinct systems:
a. Selective Attention (Flashlight Metaphor)
This system involves focusing on specific content or tasks, effectively highlighting certain information while dimming the rest.
"It's like a flashlight. You can hold this thing called our attention, you can direct it willfully, and wherever it is that you direct it toward gets this privileged access to your brain's full information processing." (08:21)
b. Alerting System (Floodlight Metaphor)
Contrasting the flashlight, the floodlight system maintains a broad, receptive awareness of the present moment without focusing on specific content.
"It's more like a floodlight, broad, receptive... you have to be fully present right now." (10:28)
c. Executive Functioning (Juggler Metaphor)
This system acts as the overseer, managing and directing attention towards goals, making decisions, and course-correcting when distractions arise.
"Just like the executive of any organization, the executive's job is to be goal-focused... and guide you to do the thing you're supposed to do." (08:12)
4. The Competition Between Attention Systems
The hosts discuss how these three systems often compete, leading to difficulties in maintaining focus. Abby Wambach raises a personal concern about her attention often turning inward, resulting in physical mishaps:
"I feel like my flashlight naturally turns inward... I can't find my keys... why do I run into things?" (13:55)
Dr. Jha explains that when one system is dominant, it suppresses the others, creating an imbalance that can lead to issues like distraction and exhaustion:
"When this system that's about focus is really activated, it's actively suppressing all the things that make you broad and receptive." (10:29)
5. The Myth of Multitasking
A significant portion of the discussion centers on the misconception of multitasking. Dr. Jha clarifies that what we often consider multitasking is, in reality, rapid task-switching, which depletes attentional resources and reduces the quality of engagement:
"When we say we're multitasking, what we think we're doing is... you're directing your flashlight to one task, and then you're pulling it back and you're directing it to another." (22:34)
Abby Wambach adds her observations on how multitasking affects personal and professional life:
"The quality of nothing really ends up being great because you haven't allowed yourself the investment of time to fully engage." (23:47)
6. Mindfulness as a Solution
Transitioning to solutions, Dr. Jha introduces mindfulness meditation as a powerful tool to balance and enhance the three attention systems. She shares her personal journey of overcoming an "attention crisis" through mindfulness:
"Mindfulness gave me a sense of fulfillment and meaning back into my life... I felt like I was more embodied in my own life." (32:10)
Abby Wambach emphasizes the transformative power of mindfulness in cultivating self-love and presence:
"I am doing it so that I can be with... that's a beautiful beginning of love." (59:57)
7. Practical Steps to Cultivate Attention
Dr. Jha outlines actionable steps for listeners to develop mindfulness and improve their attention:
a. Mindfulness of Breathing
Start with focusing on the breath as an anchor, dedicating 12 minutes a day to practice:
"Use your breath as an anchor and focus on the sensory experience of the breath." (47:07)
"When the mind wanders, that's a win because I noticed my mind wandered." (51:10)
b. Choosing Stillness
Engage in stillness practices like sitting quietly, walking meditation, or body scans to strengthen attentional control:
"Do something that requires stillness... walk and focus on the sensations of your feet moving." (54:43)
c. Building the Habit
Gradually incorporate mindfulness into daily routines, starting with a few minutes and increasing over time:
"Start with just a minute a day... build the habit and then increase the duration." (56:54)
d. Embracing Agency and Compassion
Develop meta-awareness to recognize and gently redirect attention, fostering a compassionate relationship with oneself:
"Being a friend to yourself... cultivate friendliness and agency." (40:58)
8. Overcoming Resistance and Embracing Self-Compassion
Acknowledging that mindfulness can be challenging, Dr. Jha encourages embracing discomfort and viewing the practice as an act of self-love:
"Compassion is a beautiful way to build self-compassion... you're staying with yourself for 12 minutes a day." (53:20)
Glennon Doyle adds that reframing meditation from a daunting task to a form of self-care can make it more accessible:
"Just go sit still quietly for a few minutes." (55:58)
9. Tangible Benefits of Mindfulness
Dr. Jha presents research findings demonstrating the wide-ranging benefits of mindfulness, including enhanced cognitive functioning, improved mood, better interpersonal relationships, and increased performance in high-stress professions:
"Attention gets better, mood is improved or protected... cohesion is improved and performance... medical errors are reduced." (58:16)
10. Conclusion: Cultivating Love Through Attention
The episode concludes with a powerful affirmation of the connection between self-love and the ability to love others. The hosts reinforce the idea that by mastering our attention, we can create more meaningful and joyful lives:
"Self-love is being together... improving self love to improve love in the world, who doesn't want that?" (59:57)
Abby Wambach encapsulates the essence of the discussion by highlighting the importance of being present for oneself to authentically connect with others:
"You cannot be with someone else unless you can be with yourself." (59:02)
Key Takeaways
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Understanding Attention: Recognizing the three systems of attention—selective, alerting, and executive functioning—is crucial for managing focus and presence.
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The Fallacy of Multitasking: Attempting to juggle multiple tasks simultaneously leads to diminished attention quality and increased exhaustion.
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Mindfulness as a Tool: Regular mindfulness practice can enhance attentional control, foster self-compassion, and improve overall well-being.
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Practical Implementation: Start with small, consistent mindfulness practices, gradually increasing duration and integrating stillness into daily routines.
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Benefits of Cultivating Attention: Enhanced focus, better emotional regulation, improved relationships, and higher performance levels across various aspects of life.
This episode serves as a compelling guide for anyone struggling with attention in the modern world, offering both scientific insights and practical strategies to cultivate a more focused, present, and fulfilling life.