Transcript

A (0:06)

Hey, hey. We're here. We're back. We might be drunk.

B (0:08)

Yo, what's up, dude?

A (0:10)

Oh, boy. Long day. But, hey, we're here. We're queer.

B (0:13)

What do you have?

A (0:14)

Had a pot earlier. The baby. I'm teaching him how to swim. Really? So I got to get up early and get him to the Y. He's loving it.

B (0:22)

You're not gonna be able to Casey Anthem now. Whatever.

A (0:25)

Try to Whitney Houston him. Yeah, but no dice.

B (0:29)

That's you taking the baby to the Y. That's so New York. I love that.

A (0:32)

Oh, yeah. Just me and a couple Indian ladies just flashing away, dude.

B (0:37)

Yeah.

A (0:38)

Shit.

B (0:38)

I. We rescheduled this because I was sick as fuck. I wasn't even like, you were sick in Vegas?

A (0:45)

No, I get sick after Vegas.

B (0:47)

It sucks to be sick in Vegas because I'm at the Venetian. You're like, it's not. It's just every step is a reminder that everyone is, like, having fun except you.

A (0:56)

Yes.

B (0:57)

And I'm trying to, like, be ready for the show. It's still. To the show, obviously, but I'm walking around. I'm like, well, I'm like, maybe at the food court. There's, like, a ramen place. I mean, like, blast this out of me.

A (1:06)

Yes.

B (1:06)

But then you're like. You're looking around. You're like, where the fuck am I? Because these casinos are designed to make you lost.

A (1:12)

That's true. No windows, no clocks, nothing.

B (1:14)

So, like, you're so fucked up, and you're like, I don't have my senses from the, you know, cold. Quite as high. And. And then you're like, I could play some blackjack.

Summary

We Might Be Drunk Ep 257: Fiona Cauley

Released: November 3, 2025
Hosts: Sam Morril & Mark Normand
Guest: Fiona Cauley

Overview

This episode of We Might Be Drunk features comedian Fiona Cauley, known for her dark humor and candid discussions of living with Friedrich's ataxia, a rare genetic neurological disease. Mark and Sam catch up on their gigs, debate the relative merits of various party towns, and then dive deep with Fiona about her experiences as a comic with a disability, the comedy grind, and newfound visibility through Kill Tony and viral moments. Expect classic WMBD energy: booze, bits, brutal honesty, and plenty of laughs.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Catch-Up: Life on the Road, Vegas, and Comedy Shows

Mark discusses taking his baby swimming and the quintessential New York YMCA experience.
Sam recounts being sick after a Vegas trip, noting the oddities and excesses of Vegas ("the condoms are locked up and the meds are not" - B, [01:51]).
Discussion of the weird vibe in Vegas casinos, the combination of wild tourists, local regulars, and an atmosphere frozen in time.
Reflections on how party towns like Vegas and New Orleans differ in depth and culture.

2. Opening for Fiona: The Comedy Circuit

Mark and Sam swap tales about difficult gigs in the South, including tough crowds and family in attendance.
Both share stories about parents and therapists observing their comedy ("Therapist behind the mom at your show is like, that's a session in itself" - A, [08:43]).
Anecdotes about being heckled, ejecting unruly audience members, and the peculiarities of drunk comedy fans.

3. Drinking Culture & Comic’s Takes on Booze

Extended riff on "shots guy" at shows (B, [12:16]), the perils of over-indulgence, and generational shifts in socializing.
Discussion of the Charlie Sheen documentary and how wild stories are only believable when there’s footage ("...they have the footage... you beat Michael Jordan with Martin Sheen" - B, [13:24]).

4. Fiona Cauley Joins ([31:20])

Background and Arrival

Mark and Sam reminisce with Fiona about meeting at “Don’t Tell” shows in Tennessee, emphasizing how comedy scenes differ regionally.

Disability, Comedy, and Life

Fiona openly shares living with Friedrich’s ataxia, how it affects her mobility (using hand controls to drive, "it's a lot like driving a boat" - C, [35:44]), and the small but real challenges these create on tour.
Quick-witted about handicapped parking and accessible stalls: “...If the rest are open and you choose [the handicap stall], I'm gonna sit out there and wait for you.” (C, [37:25])
Mark confesses to youthful misuse of a handicap pass, sparking laughs but also real talk about accessibility.

Family, Diagnosis & Parental Relationships

Fiona reveals being gaslit as a teenager by family about her medical reality, handling much of her diagnosis alone ([39:05]).
A candid discussion on absent fathers in comedy and life, and the dynamics of being the sibling/child who “needs” vs. “lets go” of parental validation.

Romantic Life & On-the-Road Realities

Navigating touring as a disabled comic: Fiona explains the necessity of bringing someone to assist, the logistical and financial strain this causes, and her gratitude for living in a city with direct flights ([46:21]).
Relationship logistics with her fiancé, Matt—both comics, often touring separately: “I love missing him.” (C, [53:44])
Confirming audience curiosity: disability does not mean no intimacy (“You guys are plowing? Yes, sir.” - A & C, [52:22]).

Genetic & Medical Advocacy

Serendipitous encounter with a gene therapy exec at a Boston show, leading to hope for advancements in treating Friedrich’s ataxia ([48:13]).
Education segment on gene therapy’s promise, and a plug for the FARA charity ([65:53]).

Comedy Success, TEDx Talk, & Community

The whirlwind of newfound fame via Kill Tony; the pressure to represent the disabled community (“...getting like, 20 to 30 messages a day from disabled people..." - C, [55:13]).
Experiences with audience pity, and fighting for the right to have “dark” jokes ("That actually is a hate crime." - C, [45:17]).
Reflection on the awkwardness of TEDx: "Had a panic attack... started, like, accidentally doing jokes." (C, [56:06])

5. Comedy Craft & The Scene

Sam and Mark praise Fiona’s craftsmanship—premises, punchlines, and riffing.
Discussion on the pressure of high-profile and “viral” sets versus anonymous grind work.
Peeves segment: String cheese packaging, fist-bump/handshake etiquette, and able-bodied people being addressed instead of her at hotels ("...If a disabled person is talking to you, look at them." - C, [89:40])

6. Family Tall Tales

Fiona goes in on her “legendary” dad: five marriages (three women), a wrist of failed-relationship tattoos, and white-trash soap opera saga ([93:12]–[95:48]).
Mark and Sam fawn over her supportive, athletic mom (“She turned 60 in a couple days, isn’t that crazy?” - C, [101:33]).

Notable Quotes & Moments

On Vegas excess:
"You get the fattest people in the world and the hottest people in one place. I never thought about that." – Mark, [01:46]
On navigating disability:
"I'm not paralyzed... if I can't see [my feet], I don't know where they are." – Fiona, [35:52]
On family reaction to her material:
"He goes, they didn't laugh once. And then I did a Charlie Kirk joke. My dad, all he said was, ‘Oh, boy.’ Only reaction I got..." – Mark, [08:12]
On inclusion in comedy:
"Does anyone ever push back on you because you have pretty dark jokes?" – Mark
"Oh, yeah... but it’s because they feel sad for me. That’s the worst." – Fiona ([45:07])
On accessibility hardships:
"I booked an accessible room for mobility... they're like, 'Yeah, it's hearing accessible.'...My legs are deaf, you know they're not." – Fiona, [51:13]
On self-advocacy:
"If a disabled person is talking to you, look at them." – Fiona, [89:40]
On family drama and resilience:
"My dad has been married five times to three women... He gets their wedding date tattooed on his wrist... then a black heart over it for dead love..." – Fiona, [93:12–95:48]
On representation:
"That's been the craziest part...I’m getting like, you know, 20, 30 messages a day from disabled people, from people that have family members like me..." – Fiona, [55:13]

Important Timestamps

[00:06 – 07:01]: Opening banter, Vegas and road stories
[31:20]: Fiona Cauley joins, background and meet-cute stories
[35:44]: Discussion of hand controls and driving with disability
[39:05]: Parental gaslighting, diagnosis story
[46:21]: The financial and logistical reality of touring with a disability
[48:13]: Meeting a gene therapy exec and advocacy revelation
[52:22]: Discussing intimacy and relationship details
[55:13]: Messages from disabled fans/audience
[65:53]: Details on Friedrich’s ataxia, plug for FARA charity
[70:41]: “Peeves” segment (string cheese, fist-bump awkwardness, etc.)
[93:12–95:48]: Fiona's father: marriages, tattoos, wild personal tales
[103:31]: Upcoming tour schedule for Fiona

Recommendations & Plugs

Fiona Cauley Tour: Dania Beach, Louisville, Fort Wayne, Appleton, Chandler, and more—see her live for sharp material and unexpected inspiration.
Charity: Donate to FARA (Friedrich’s Ataxia Research Alliance): https://www.curefa.org/
Fiona's Podcast: Ramp It Up – launching soon.
Fiona’s Upcoming TEDx Talk: On comedy, disability, and visibility (look for release online).
Hosts' Plugs:
- Mark: Lincoln Theater (DC), Niagara Falls, San Diego, and more
- Sam: Salt Lake City Wiseguys, Reno Atlantis Casino, Carnegie Hall

Tone & Style

True to We Might Be Drunk tradition, this episode balances raunchy riffs, insider comedy bits, and raw conversation. There’s an undercurrent of mutual respect and admiration for Fiona’s quick wit, unflinching honesty, and joke-first sensibility, making for an episode as funny as it is moving.

“That’s actually a hate crime.” – Fiona Cauley on audience pity ([45:17])