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Mark
So you're in town promoting a new David Wayne movie?
Thomas Lennon
I was actually in town. I also wrote a musical, Trading Places. I wrote the musical Trading Places.
Mark
You're like, you have a sweet writing resume.
Thomas Lennon
I do a lot of stuff.
Mark
What made you want a resume?
Thomas Lennon
Class. It's. Yeah, we took the song by Usher, and we made it into. There you go. Shit. You guys just have everything. You just look at everything as it comes up.
Mark
Yeah, this is the future, man.
Thomas Lennon
I know both those guys actually know. All I know. Three out of four of those, which.
Mark
Who do you know?
Thomas Lennon
I only want. I don't know, is Ackroyd.
Nick
What?
Mark
You know Eddie Murphy?
Thomas Lennon
I've been to Eddie's house.
Nick
Whoa.
Mark
We're going.
Thomas Lennon
Oh, we're already going.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Oh, shit. I didn't know we were going. I would have puffed up my cheeks and stuff. Yeah, I got to go to Eddie Murphy's house one time. It was very cool.
Nick
What. Do tell.
Thomas Lennon
All right, what do you want to know?
Nick
Was it a party? Was it a Thanksgiving.
Thomas Lennon
No, no, no. It was just a little quiet hangout. Just you two getting some notes on a script that never happened.
Nick
Whoa. Norbit 2.
Thomas Lennon
It was obviously. It was Norbit 2. Which did happen.
Nick
Oh, it did, didn't it? Really? Joking.
Thomas Lennon
Isn't Norbit just a spin off of Nutty? Professor showed up.
Mark
He's just being big again.
Thomas Lennon
How much do I get if I win all the questions?
Mark
You get a glass of red wine,
Thomas Lennon
a picture of Eddie Murphy's house.
Nick
Oh, there it is. Wow.
Thomas Lennon
I've never seen a photograph of it.
Nick
It's like a resort.
Thomas Lennon
All I know is it is like a resort, and I think they got, you know, like, heating a pool that big.
Nick
Damn.
Mark
Like Epstein without the guilt.
Thomas Lennon
Can you imagine heating a pool that big? I mean, these are Norbert problems. I don't know. Okay, that seems like it's right. I was not invited to the pool area to, like, splash around or anything.
Nick
Ouch.
Thomas Lennon
I was kind of there working.
Nick
Okay.
Mark
What was this?
Thomas Lennon
Very low. That's.
Mark
What was the script you were working on?
Nick
Can you say.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, I can say it never. It never happened. We were writing a version of the Incredible Shrinking man for Eddie. It was a remake of the old idea for Eddie, and the idea was that he was a Vegas. You're not gonna cross through frame with this.
Nick
Thank you. Your love handles are really killing me. Good Lord. That belt is ruined.
Thomas Lennon
It's not the worst wine I've ever
Mark
smelled, but Joel McHale.
Thomas Lennon
Joel McHale brought it. Joel McHale's. Cheers. Is a wine enthusiast.
Nick
I didn't know that.
Thomas Lennon
Of the highest order. Mikhail's. Yeah. Mikhail's a expert on wine.
Nick
You must know that. Oh, yeah, he's good.
Thomas Lennon
We were working on a.
Mark
It's pretty good.
Thomas Lennon
If it's from Mikhail, it's going to be good. I play his brother on a show. We don't have to plug the.
Nick
The animal control.
Thomas Lennon
Correct.
Nick
Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
Mark
So on that show, too. Mike Roland, Comedy Cell.
Thomas Lennon
Very funny, dude.
Mark
I like that guy a lot.
Nick
Cute kid.
Thomas Lennon
He's a very cute kid. He's a real cute kid.
Mark
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
We're not going to talk about the big. The man just dressed in my outfit. Wow.
Nick
It's a dress.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Mark
Are you flattered? Are you creeped out? What's the feeling?
Thomas Lennon
I like it a lot.
Nick
I would wear that if you bought me one.
Thomas Lennon
So we're out at Eddie's house. We get out to Eddie's house to get to Eddie's house to. For starters, there's a. There's like a gate like Jurassic Park. You know, like to keep out a T. Rex or something like that. So we get to the gate and the guy asks you, like, he's got his hand on his Glock. The security guy. It's not like lightweight security guys, you know, sometimes there's security guys like Trader Joe's Security or something is like, not a big deal.
Nick
Sure.
Thomas Lennon
When you go to. How are these pictures existing? When you go to Eddie's house, there's a Google Maps. The guys already have their hand on the weapon.
Mark
Damn.
Thomas Lennon
And they're like, what are you doing here? And you say like, oh, I'm going to see Eddie Murphy. And they're like, why?
Nick
Whoa.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. You're like, we're working on.
Mark
Yeah. I'm not in a book or something.
Thomas Lennon
We're working on. We're working on a version of the Incredible shrinking man for him. And they're like, do you think that's a good idea? We're like, yeah. We're like. He's like a Vegas magician is like David Blaine. So everybody thinks he's doing it as a bit, but it turns out he's been, like, cursed by a real magician. They're like, okay, if you think that works, we'll let you in.
Mark
You got to pitch the security. This is intense.
Nick
Whoa. No.
Thomas Lennon
They did ask what we. What was our business with Mr. Murphy? You know, good for them. And then you get to Eddie's house, and then there's another gate the size of Jurassic Park.
Mark
Wow.
Thomas Lennon
And that one just kind of opens. I don't know how that one opens. And then there's another armed guy, I think.
Mark
And then the Tony Montana. What a line.
Thomas Lennon
Third boss. If you're playing like. If it's like final bosses of going into Eddie's house.
Nick
Jesus.
Thomas Lennon
Is Arsenio hall
Mark
as the Jewish guy coming to America?
Thomas Lennon
No way. Arsenio Hall's hanging out at Eddie's house. Is he? 100%, yes.
Nick
Whoa.
Thomas Lennon
Third. Third boss. We meet right before Eddie was Arsenio Hall.
Nick
What do they. They did Sexual chocolate. Remember that. That church group in Trading Places. Is that what it's called?
Thomas Lennon
That's in actually. Although.
Nick
Coming to America.
Thomas Lennon
Coming to America. Although it has two characters from Trading Places. The Duke brothers reappear. Remember Mortimer?
Mark
That's right.
Thomas Lennon
And Randolph show up again.
Nick
That's funny.
Mark
Hobos, right?
Nick
Yes.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. And Eddie gives them like a pile of riches.
Nick
Yes. In a McDonald's bag. We're back. Yeah. Nice little callback in a movie which is. You don't see anymore.
Thomas Lennon
Can you think of one other movie callback to a completely different franchise where they reference a completely different movie where a character appears.
Nick
You got one? I think in.
Thomas Lennon
I don't know If I have one.
Nick
48 out. No. Beverly Hills Copy Cop. Not Ninja. They do a show both to find out of him walking by in a leather. A guy walking by in a leather suit and it's a red leather suit. And he goes.
Thomas Lennon
It's delirious.
Nick
He laughs at them walking down the sidewalk. And I think it's a callback.
Thomas Lennon
It's a great reference.
Mark
I would not have gotten that.
Thomas Lennon
So it seems like most.
Mark
The.
Thomas Lennon
Most of the references are Eddie references. Eddie's referencing other Eddie movies.
Nick
Well, we couldn't get Eddie. So we're going to talk about it.
Thomas Lennon
I forgot there's a guy in a. In a delirious jumpsuit.
Nick
Come on.
Mark
What's the vibe with Eddie when you're. When you're hanging?
Thomas Lennon
Very cool. It was very cool.
Nick
There it is.
Thomas Lennon
That. Oh, yeah.
Nick
So he's laughing. Look at this. Look at these idiots. But he's making fun of himself.
Thomas Lennon
Is that not a white dude in the jumpsuit?
Nick
Maybe that's why he's laughing.
Thomas Lennon
That's a fun joke of it. Oh, it's slightly homophobic.
Mark
I mean, that's. You think that's homophobic? Do not put on his old stand up, because that will. Holy shit.
Thomas Lennon
Very cool.
Nick
I met.
Thomas Lennon
So you meet Eddie and he comes out and he was very cool. Yeah. And I said. I said it's an honor. You know, I said, like, the way you would meet royalty, and Eddie went like, correct. Like. You didn't say correct, but the vibe was like. That's the perfect thing to say to me.
Nick
We went to the Netflix brunch and he was there and he, like, levitated in and the whole. You know, it's Sandler, Letterman, Seinfeld, all these guys.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Nick
Were you there?
Thomas Lennon
No.
Nick
Okay.
Thomas Lennon
I was not at that one.
Nick
All right.
Thomas Lennon
It's interesting because there's. It's Old Jew.
Producer
This is track listings for Delirious.
Thomas Lennon
Is that the Delirious?
Nick
Yeah.
Mark
Damn.
Nick
I don't remember that.
Thomas Lennon
I don't remember. I don't remember these by the titles.
Nick
I don't either.
Thomas Lennon
Titles don't.
Nick
There's no F bomb track titles.
Thomas Lennon
Don't remind me of the bits as much as you would think.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Because I know all the bits.
Mark
I remember hearing this. I mean, I remember consuming standup as just like audio as a kid.
Nick
Yeah.
Mark
And it was like, kind of more intimate, kind of cool.
Nick
It's better. I think it's better.
Thomas Lennon
There's a couple records I can do. Probably the whole record.
Nick
Oh, yeah.
Mark
I mean, listen to Skank for the memories as a kid and being like, this is the greatest thing I've ever heard.
Nick
It's incredible.
Thomas Lennon
I do almost all of the best of Bob Newhart. If I probably.
Mark
Wow.
Nick
Driving instructor. I tried to get through a Cosby. I fell asleep.
Thomas Lennon
I can do the. I can do Cosby's driving in San Francisco.
Nick
Oh, yeah, the wine. Somebody put a stop sign at the top of the hill. Or that's up to put. To go to street in San Francisco called LA Monster Street. And somebody put a stop sign.
Thomas Lennon
You sent it over to binoculars.
Nick
We grab another one. Wow. That was a great cause.
Thomas Lennon
So if you know one thing about me, I think it's that my Cosby's none. There is no equal.
Nick
Just the later work.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, yeah. I can do. I can do most of Bob New. The best of Bob Newhart.
Nick
I hit me.
Thomas Lennon
Duh. I mean, you know, you do Abe Lincoln versus Madison Avenue, but it's Abe, you changed. Changed Forest Garden seven years ago to 87. No, no, Abe. See, no, I understand that they mean the same thing, but.
Nick
Oh, wow, look at Bob up here.
Thomas Lennon
If it ever comes up. Abe, you were a rail splitter and then an attorney. See, nobody quits being an attorney to become a rail splitter, Abe.
Nick
Whoa. I think that won an Emmy. That Alb.
Thomas Lennon
I've lost three Emmys, guys.
Nick
Or a Grammy. What happened?
Thomas Lennon
I don't know.
Nick
The state.
Thomas Lennon
No, no, no, no, no, no, no. What are they for there? Here's when Reno 911 started getting shorter, we got into a new category which was like short form Emmy. We never really got nominated. In the Normal. Yeah, you know, in the normals.
Nick
Sure, sure.
Thomas Lennon
It was as soon as we dropped weight, we dropped a ton of weight, and we got into short form.
Mark
How long? What's the minimum or maximum, rather?
Thomas Lennon
I think a short form has to be like under 12 minutes or something.
Nick
Oh, wow. Okay. So if you're ever looking to try
Thomas Lennon
to get an Emmy, go short form.
Nick
I didn't know that.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Little secret. It's the same size Emmy if you get it.
Nick
Can we talk about the state? Yeah, I used to watch that in high school.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Mark
That's a crazy group of talented people.
Nick
Crazy group.
Thomas Lennon
Interesting Cats.
Nick
How'd that start? And how'd you get it on mtv?
Thomas Lennon
That was interesting. So should I do a plug for the picture here and then we don't have to plug it again?
Mark
Yeah, here it is.
Nick
Right.
Producer
All right.
Thomas Lennon
We're doing David Wayne's. Got a Ken Marino and David Wayne have a picture coming out called Gail Daughtry and the Celebrity Sex Pad.
Nick
Check it out.
Thomas Lennon
Check it out.
Producer
Is that all right?
Thomas Lennon
It's fine by me. While the trailer plays. It's actually great. She's great. That's Carrie Kenny.
Mark
Oh, okay.
Thomas Lennon
Carrie and I went to theater. Can we talk over this as a please, please? So Carrie and I met.
Mark
Yeah, Mute it.
Thomas Lennon
Just Carrie, Kenny and I went to theater camp. We met. We were 16 years old. So I've known Carrie since 1986. 87.
Nick
Wow.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. And we've worked basically together almost, you know, not everyday sense, but as close to everyday sense as you could. As you could really do, you know? Because then we did. So we went to nyu. We did. We were just a regular comedy group called the New Group. We actually got founded because the guy who started our group had been kicked out of different comedy group and NYU called the Sterile Yak. Todd, who's in the front of that picture there, he founded the state. And then we were actually. We were called a new group and we were. You know.
Nick
That's a lot of guys.
Thomas Lennon
Way too many, way too many. There's 11 members of the state.
Nick
Whoa. Where's Showalter? Oh, there. He's there.
Thomas Lennon
He's there. Backwards hat looking. Look how angry we all look.
Nick
I know. What's the 90s?
Thomas Lennon
It was grunge well, we're also pretty angry.
Nick
Man, that guy.
Thomas Lennon
Look how angry Joe looks in the front. We look just pissed off.
Nick
Joe's in a ton of movies.
Thomas Lennon
And we. I would say that we were. Weirdly, we were a sort of an. We're not angry people. But I think we. We viewed ourselves as cool sort. Yeah, I think we viewed ourselves as like a sort of a punk band or something. You know, we felt like we were react. Like we were reacting to sort of what we thought was sort of mainstream sketch that we.
Mark
What did you look at? You're like, I don't want to be.
Thomas Lennon
We didn't want to be SNL that era, for sure. We wanted to not be that. In fact, we'd rather. I think the reason, you know, the work holds up because we. Instead of doing. If we ever did something that felt like it was covered before, we just wouldn't do it nice. So we just ended up doing. But that's why a lot of the stuff is just sort of. Is pretty absurd stuff that we were doing, you know.
Nick
But the 90s had a run of this. It was like this Kids in the hall Mr. Show. It was kind of that. A Ben Stiller show for a Stiller show. In Living Color, to an extent.
Thomas Lennon
Stiller show also hit some amazing. Have you ever seen Stiller's True Stories about Bruce Springsteen?
Nick
No.
Thomas Lennon
It's a fucking great sketch from the Ben Stiller show. It's always, you know, you hear stories about Springsteen. Springsteen showed up. He played for four hours. He recobbled my shoes. Like, the stories just keep getting more amazing about, like, he burst through the wall like the Kool Aid Man. It was a great recurring character. Yeah. No, I'd say, actually, weirdly, those four shows in particular are sort of of a. You know, I mean, I feel like there's a lot of overlap in Sensibility, I know, between Bob and David. And, you know, we're all. We're friends with all the Kids in the hall at this point in our life. I played Dave Foley. Kevin from Kids in the hall has a musical about his life. I got to play Dave Foley.
Nick
Ken McDonald.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. Because Dave Foley passed. So.
Nick
He did.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, he didn't want to do it, and then he died.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
No, no, no, no. He passed on the project. Once you see the project, you're like, oh, I know why Foley passed. He wouldn't play this version of Dave Foley. But I was like, yeah, I'll play that version of Dave Foley. It. Yeah.
Mark
Did you ever go out for SNL or.
Thomas Lennon
No, I did not, no, no, I never did. Did you.
Mark
Did any part of you want it? Were you always like, oh my God.
Thomas Lennon
I would have probably loved it, but yeah, it just never, never came up. I met Lorne Michaels one time at like the Village Gate seeing some other sketch show, but. Oh, we were seeing, I think a group called Live on Tape. But no, I never went up. I don't know if I would have made it. I've never. I don't have a ton of great impressions other than my impeccable Bill Cosby,
Nick
Cosby and Newhart, which.
Thomas Lennon
Oh, that's a new hard impression. I could just recite it.
Nick
Uh huh.
Thomas Lennon
But I've never. I don't know how I would have done it at SNL audition, you know?
Nick
Yeah, I think you'd nail it. You're a funny guy.
Thomas Lennon
That's not always the full criteria.
Mark
You play a good gay guy.
Thomas Lennon
I do. I guess you get cast as a
Mark
gay guy a lot.
Thomas Lennon
I know that comes up a lot.
Mark
How do you feel about that?
Thomas Lennon
That's fine by me. I mean, I just seem, you know, I'm not. I've always been a sort of Bob Fosse enthusiast.
Mark
I can see that. Little Fosse in there.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. A little Fosse.
Nick
Hmm.
Producer
He's straight.
Thomas Lennon
I happen to Bob was straight too. Yeah.
Mark
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
He just sort of seems like me, you know, There's a lot.
Mark
Yeah, but it's like, it's like drama straight.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, exactly.
Nick
Drama straight.
Thomas Lennon
I'm theater school.
Mark
I mean, the whole opening to all that jazz is just all the women he's banging. That's like a five minute montage of like. Let's get out of here is the
Thomas Lennon
crazy thing about all that jazz. Yeah.
Nick
Great movie.
Mark
Oh, yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Maybe the best.
Mark
Maybe the best ending to a movie ever.
Nick
Yeah. Crazy Good opening too, with the pills.
Mark
Great opening.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Showtime. When has anybody else made a movie where they're so honest? Like, he's right. He's telling you the story of how
Mark
Dave Foley wouldn't have played that version.
Thomas Lennon
He's going to die.
Nick
I know. Yeah. By the way, Michael Jackson stole everything from Fosse. Pull up some of Fosse's moves.
Thomas Lennon
I just saw.
Mark
And you know what black people stole from Elvis?
Thomas Lennon
I saw that. Exactly. And it is.
Nick
Watch his moves.
Thomas Lennon
It is Bob Fosse and a very specific movie. Oh, it's the movie of the Little Prince. Oh, there it is. You got it.
Nick
Look at that. This is Fosse.
Thomas Lennon
That's Fosse doing Little Prince.
Nick
Come on. This is. This is Ripping. He's ripping off Fosse completely.
Mark
I do feel like the type of straight you are, though.
Thomas Lennon
I'm not here when this goes viral for you, Sam.
Nick
I'm calling it.
Thomas Lennon
But look at that.
Nick
Every move.
Thomas Lennon
He also does flash a lady, which is also pretty weird there.
Nick
All right, that's kind of Michael, too.
Thomas Lennon
Fosse killing this.
Nick
I mean, that is.
Thomas Lennon
Maybe I am gay. Man, this looks really cool. No, but the type.
Mark
The type of straight you are gets a lot of women, I think. Don't you think it.
Nick
Oh, yeah, probably.
Mark
Cuz. Cuz there's like a safety thing, I think that you disarm them with your
Thomas Lennon
back in the era. Yeah. I don't know. It could. Could. We'll never know.
Nick
I mean, that's crazy.
Thomas Lennon
That is crazy.
Nick
And I'm not the only guy saying it. I'm just.
Thomas Lennon
Is this the first time people talk about. There's a lot of New York Knicks gear on the show today during the playoffs, and we're talking Bob Fosse.
Mark
We.
Thomas Lennon
We got a lot of range with you guys all day long. Now, are we saying Beyonce stole from Bob? Because I do not want to. Oh, no, she. That's different.
Nick
That's very different.
Thomas Lennon
Oh, no, it is not. No.
Mark
Mexican women of many interests. But I got to ask a question.
Thomas Lennon
But mostly Bob Fosse.
Mark
We love Fosse.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
His birthday is June 23rd. Same as day as my son. That's the way I know.
Mark
Well, so I know you're buddies with Nick Swarton. So I text him right before and I said, what do I ask him? And he said, he said to ask, what's it like going in character to Comic Con?
Nick
Whoa.
Thomas Lennon
It's an interesting thing. So my feeling.
Mark
Yeah, you go in his dangle.
Thomas Lennon
I do them some. Swartz and I do them together sometimes.
Mark
Wow.
Thomas Lennon
Now, he's not. He doesn't put on the turret cloth shorts and stuff. But my. Here's my thing. My thing is I don't do stuff. I don't really do anything. Oh, go to the Reddit one. Go to the Reddit one.
Producer
I can't.
Thomas Lennon
Reddit won't allow you.
Producer
Sign in and everyone will know my name.
Thomas Lennon
Oh, okay. But so I don't do anything halfway, you know, I don't do it. I do it.
Nick
Look at that.
Thomas Lennon
If you're going to a fan convention, be the impulse Buy, you know, you want to be that pointless candy that they get at the front.
Nick
You know, the virgins must have gone nuts when they saw you. Or are you Aged out.
Thomas Lennon
Who's that?
Nick
Like the guys at Comic Con when they saw the real Dangle.
Thomas Lennon
It does. It does have a certain. Yeah, it has a certain effect. I got touched by a lot. Like a lot of old ladies. Oh, no, no, no, no. A lot of. A lot of older ladies want to just kind of feel around a little bit.
Nick
Oh, yeah.
Thomas Lennon
They want to let their hands do the talking. There we go.
Nick
Look, there's.
Mark
Hey, you're low key fit like, look at that.
Nick
Oh, yeah.
Mark
You kind of have to be to pull that outfit off. Sorry, Peters, but I think you.
Thomas Lennon
I think you look great also, by the way.
Mark
You look great.
Thomas Lennon
It's like 105 degrees outside New York City today.
Mark
It is.
Thomas Lennon
Did you wear it on the train here? Sure.
Mark
Oh, you're. You're amazing.
Thomas Lennon
You want to go goof around later and I'll go with you?
Nick
Oh, that would be amazing.
Mark
You meet.
Thomas Lennon
We go down to the West Village. You ain't never paint for a drink. I'm just talking Bob Fosse.
Nick
Red wine.
Thomas Lennon
We're having some red wine. Look like a park ranger stuff.
Mark
So are those. I mean, the lines must be crazy at those.
Thomas Lennon
It depends. I'll tell you, if you ever have a slow moment at a convention, it's the. It is the truly the long, dark tea time of the soul when you like, have a minute to just think to yourself, and you're standing in go, go shorts.
Nick
Oh, yeah.
Thomas Lennon
You know, and you're next to Danny Trejo and you're like, hey, Trejo. And he's like, hey, Thomas, do you like. Do we. Is this. How do we end up?
Mark
You're in the good section if you're with Trejo.
Thomas Lennon
I spend more time with Trejo at this point in my life than I maybe would have expected.
Nick
Do you throw a sock in there or is that all natural?
Thomas Lennon
It's mostly natural.
Nick
Mostly. But.
Thomas Lennon
Well, no, what I will say what I do is I do double underwear.
Nick
That's smart.
Thomas Lennon
I wear two sets of underwear. And I just. I realized that at some point, like, if you're in that level of small thing, just do double underwear.
Nick
And you don't want a ball hanging.
Thomas Lennon
You know that. And there's a lot of just touchy stuff.
Nick
Aha.
Thomas Lennon
Also, what if you dribble or something? I don't know. You just like, what, double britches.
Nick
I get.
Thomas Lennon
It has been a new thing that I learned at the conventions and I'm pretty happy about it.
Nick
Hear, hear.
Mark
That pose is unbelievable. That's perfect. That's what you want out of a picture.
Thomas Lennon
I was walking. So I'm walking out of a convention early in the morning. It's, you know, 10 o' clock in the morning, and a Rascal scooter comes by and it's William Shatner. Whoa.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Shatner's at the conventions a lot and I. He's coming by and this felt really good. Shatner's zipping by me on the Rascal scooter and he goes, great legs. I was like, yeah, that was cool.
Mark
That's impression three, by the way.
Thomas Lennon
Let's get Lorne Michaels on the horn.
Mark
Were you a big Star Trek guy?
Thomas Lennon
No.
Mark
Me neither. But Shatner still has this, like, gravity to it.
Thomas Lennon
When I see one of those, I'm like, oh, yeah, this is great.
Nick
Yeah, I think he's 100.
Mark
He's super old.
Thomas Lennon
No, he's a 96. Whoa. I think he's 96 years old.
Producer
That is great.
Nick
And still with. Just went away. Great.
Thomas Lennon
He looks great.
Nick
95.
Thomas Lennon
Sorry, 95. Wait. March 22, 1931. Till now.
Nick
So that's. His birthday is in like, you know, two days.
Thomas Lennon
March.
Producer
That's.
Nick
I don't know where we are.
Thomas Lennon
When is this coming out this year? Are we in 26 or.
Mark
Yeah.
Nick
Peter's body is throwing me.
Mark
Can I go back to Trading Places for a sec? I mean, what made you. I love the movie, obviously. I mean, it's. That was a huge getting in. Eddie Murphy as a child was like, yeah, that was like, incredible because you get so many in a row.
Thomas Lennon
But Trading Places ever been? You know, I was talking about this the other day. We're doing a musical of Trading Places. It's been a lot of fun. But when. When Trading Places came out and Trading Places in Beverly Hills got this run of EDDIE MURPHY Movies, 48 Hours. Not only is there no one in the world that famous right now, I don't know if there ever will be
Mark
as 48 hours of musicals, Although slurs,
Thomas Lennon
a lot of rhymes, but, like, the amount of famous that Eddie was then, is that achievable?
Nick
No.
Thomas Lennon
Now I don't know if it is too spread out. When there was four TV stations and
Nick
everybody saw the movie, everybody saw any.
Mark
Every movie, we were more connected. Now it's like, it's cool because there's more of a middle class. How did we all see entertainment?
Thomas Lennon
But did we see Delirious on, like, hbo? Oh, no, we rented the vhs. We rented it because it was pretty dirty.
Nick
You got that right.
Mark
You even think about movie, What a
Thomas Lennon
beautiful girl like you doing in the islands. Crying boot.
Nick
That's number four. So.
Mark
What a beautiful girl.
Thomas Lennon
You know, your girl goes to the islands. The guy is swinging his dick.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
What a boot of a girl like you doing in the island. Crying boot.
Mark
I do it without a girl.
Thomas Lennon
Throws his dick over her shoulder.
Nick
Is that your own or is that the bodega guy?
Thomas Lennon
No, that's Eddie.
Nick
Oh, that's Eddie.
Thomas Lennon
Is that delirious or is that. That might be.
Nick
Oh, I don't remember that. Bitch.
Thomas Lennon
That's raw.
Nick
Blacked out, raw.
Mark
It's when your girl is great too.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, your girl goes.
Nick
Got great bits, got great moments.
Mark
The rocky bit is so fun.
Thomas Lennon
Your girl goes to Jamaica or someplace and she meets an island guy. Yeah, it's a great bit.
Nick
Great bit.
Thomas Lennon
Walks up with his dick swinging in the breeze.
Mark
Are you just watching Trading Places? Like I can make that. Like, how does that.
Thomas Lennon
No, no, that was the way that worked. Is the guy who. The producer of that is a guy who used to own Final Draft, the screenwriting software. I know it's a weird, boring story, but he thought it would make us great musical.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
And now we've been working on it for like seven or eight years. Musicals take a real long time. Just ask our friend Bob Fosse. But boy, they take a fuck long time to get a musical going. Really Thought movies were slow. No, Broadway musicals. Very. Like, like. It's like being a passenger on an aircraft carrier. That's like making a real slow left turn right for like a miles.
Nick
So like Book of Mormon, Hamilton, all that took forever to make?
Thomas Lennon
Oh, yeah. No, some of those, you know, I don't know how long. I know they took a while and usually like you sort of stand them up. Like we actually Trading Places ran in Atlanta. Ah, yeah. And then we did a huge rewrite after that and now it's completely different, so it's all happening again. But
Nick
did you watch Blue Moon?
Thomas Lennon
Oh, here it goes.
Mark
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Nick
Good point.
Mark
This is good stuff. And Willy's sold out three times in the first six months with over 50,000 happy customers. And they just restocked.
Nick
Whoa. Yeah, let me get a hit of that.
Mark
That's good stuff. Order now@drink willys.com and use code WMBD for 20 off your first order, plus free shipping on orders over $95. And enjoy life in the high country.
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Thomas Lennon
Oh, his name is Dexter St. Jacques. Walk up swinging his dick. No. What a beautiful girl like you any good at smooth Bahamas on your woman? Bahamas. Yeah. This is the island for love. You should be being held right now. Okay. Hotel that your man standing Me go over there and tell him that you treat a woman like you like a princess. Constantly. Constantly. If he was my woman. Is that right?
Nick
Still hits. Still hit.
Mark
You got to be really good at standup to rock that outfit.
Thomas Lennon
That's right.
Nick
Of course.
Thomas Lennon
That is actually.
Nick
If you bomb that outfit.
Thomas Lennon
I would argue this outfit's better than the red jumpsuit.
Nick
I think how you like the purple and black?
Thomas Lennon
It's a little. I don't know, it's a little more subtle. Yeah, I mean, it's still. It's a purple paisley jumpsuit.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Oh, look. People debate which ones. I don't. I like the raw outfit.
Nick
The red was a little more fitted, kind of better, but it's.
Thomas Lennon
I like the scarf a lot.
Nick
The ass in the red, though.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, but look at that. The scarf hanging with the purple outfit.
Nick
Come on. Yeah. All right. I do like the scarf.
Producer
And he's wearing driving gloves.
Thomas Lennon
It's fucking badass. Is he. Is he wearing driving gloves? Is that in Raw, he's got.
Producer
No. Yeah, in Raw, he's wearing driving.
Thomas Lennon
Wow.
Nick
You ever heard that old story where the Eddie Murphy's on a elevator with like, six of his bouncers, giant black dudes?
Thomas Lennon
That is apocryphal. There's no way that story is true.
Nick
Well, I'm just telling the story my entire life.
Producer
What?
Mark
What?
Thomas Lennon
What?
Nick
All right, try to tell it.
Thomas Lennon
Tell it.
Nick
All right, so he's on the elevator with like. He's like, in some LA high rise, going up to see his agent or whatever, one of these big old skyscrapers. And he's in there with six giant black dudes, sunglasses, they're all wearing black trench coats. And a blonde lady just happens to get in on, like, the sixth floor. They're going up to the 30th floor, and she's like, oh, geez, what the fuck did I walk into? And then she's just standing there, and they're all surrounding her, and Eddie Murphy goes, get her. And she goes, oh, my God. And she hits the floor. She's like, please don't rape me. Don't hurt me. And they all start laughing.
Thomas Lennon
Okay, here's the original version of that apocryphal story, okay, that I've heard is that it's in a casino, and it's Eddie Murphy and a bunch of, like, his bodyguards. And the lady gets in, and she's just won a bunch of stuff. She's won a bunch of chips.
Nick
Oh.
Thomas Lennon
And she's going up to the room, and she gets in the elevator, and he says, hit the floor. And she drops her chips and falls down on the ground. And he said, hit the button of the floor that you want to go to. That was the original version of the Eddie Murphy.
Mark
That makes more sense.
Thomas Lennon
Which makes a little more sense.
Mark
A misunderstanding over a gang rape.
Nick
I think that's a telephone.
Thomas Lennon
It's a game of telephone. But I believe even the slightly more polished version is still not true.
Nick
Oh, really?
Thomas Lennon
Do we think that there's.
Nick
No.
Thomas Lennon
That's, like, the Phil Collins in the Air tonight. Yeah.
Nick
Wait, what's that one?
Thomas Lennon
Oh, you don't know this one Eminem even talks about? Yeah, Collins in the Air tonight.
Nick
I know the song.
Thomas Lennon
You know, the. Okay.
Mark
The woman was drowning, and he saw
Thomas Lennon
a guy, and Phil put the spotlight on the guy in the audience at a show because he didn't say that one.
Nick
No, no. Do tell.
Mark
And, like, that's how you confront him instead of just calling the police.
Thomas Lennon
Wouldn't that. But that's where it doesn't. That's where it falls apart. Yeah.
Nick
Oh, he's drowning a woman.
Thomas Lennon
No.
Nick
Or is it also a gang rape?
Thomas Lennon
This woman's being raped at sea.
Nick
Okay, now we're getting somewhere.
Thomas Lennon
And Richard Gere is the only person who saw it.
Nick
And then a German comes out.
Thomas Lennon
No, there used to be. We used to have, like, great stories, like, you know, we used to have, like, apocryphal stories that we all knew.
Nick
Well, there was no Internet. You couldn't look it up.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. You Just had to hear about someone blowing a whole soccer team, right? Or something like that.
Mark
That would mean now it's like, have you seen this meme?
Nick
Yeah, exactly.
Mark
It's not the same.
Thomas Lennon
It's not the same as. As spoken as our beautiful spoken memories. Like Rockstar blows a whole soccer team, right? Guy has gerbil but in his ass. We used to have beautiful stories we told each other.
Nick
What about the Dave?
Mark
How sick of that story.
Thomas Lennon
Tell each other such up stories.
Nick
It's fun.
Thomas Lennon
It was fun.
Nick
It's. It's a storytelling.
Mark
How much do you think Richard here could ask that too?
Thomas Lennon
Somebody started. Somebody started both of those stories.
Nick
You better believe it.
Thomas Lennon
Like, who's the person out there in the world that was like, wait, I got one. I got. I got one.
Nick
If you can write Harry Potter, you can write that.
Mark
What you think it was her?
Thomas Lennon
I've never, never heard Dave.
Mark
She got Dumbledore in the gerbil.
Thomas Lennon
What's the Dave Thomas?
Mark
I don't know.
Producer
I can't find that. Was it Dave Thomas?
Nick
Maybe it wasn't Dave Thomas. It was somebody where he would. On a glass coffee table and he would lay under the. Somebody would. On the coffee table. And he had got off on that. Not the Wendy.
Mark
That's an expensive fetish. Yeah, you got to keep replacing coffee tables.
Nick
Ah, you clean it windows.
Thomas Lennon
The guy. I don't think it was. It can't have been the little guy from Wendy's.
Nick
Was it glass coffee table. I forgot the guy's name. Danny Thomas. That's it. Danny Thomas. He's like a Broadway guy.
Thomas Lennon
Marlo Thomas's father. I'm not gonna go anywhere into this story.
Nick
There he is.
Thomas Lennon
There is no way this story is true. And I'm not affiliated.
Nick
How do you know?
Thomas Lennon
I mean, there's apparently with this story
Mark
on the show, they say Charles Lauden ate poop sandwiches. That was like a thing he was into.
Nick
Really great actor, by the way.
Mark
Witness for the prosecution. Check that one out.
Thomas Lennon
Marvin Blythe.
Nick
Yeah, he's full of.
Mark
Because it's like a weird fetish. I don't know. It's hard to find the Internet. I have a friend who swears by it.
Nick
Pooper nickel.
Mark
Well, but yeah, it's on there. Charles Lauden.
Producer
I'm getting there.
Thomas Lennon
One day. One day we're gonna be dead and somebody will be able to Google us with shit sandwich. They'll be like, no, it's totally true. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Nick
There's already an A.I. squeeze his balls.
Thomas Lennon
He'd find a book and Squeeze his balls in it. And then he'd let the elevator door take it up. Like there's gonna be.
Mark
Yeah, but it's funny when it's, like, a classy actor like Charles Law.
Nick
Right? Oh, there he is.
Producer
It did say it's in the story or somewhere
Thomas Lennon
and love to eat poop sandwiches.
Mark
No, he was disappointed by the commercial failure of Night of the Hunter and he decided to eat poop. It all adds up, guys.
Thomas Lennon
Night of the Hunter is a great.
Mark
That's a great movie.
Thomas Lennon
Oh, we gotta get in 900. It's the first ever appearance of the love hate.
Mark
Yeah, right. Robert Mitchum.
Producer
Dude, I think he was closeted homosexual. And that sounds like a nasty rumor you would make about a closet.
Mark
Wow, that makes sense.
Thomas Lennon
Damn.
Mark
So I'm part of the problem.
Thomas Lennon
Natural extrapolation of that. That feels weird.
Nick
You'll play him in a movie.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
I don't know.
Thomas Lennon
What is it saying? Same thing about Danny Thomas. Is that what we're saying?
Nick
Let's get to the time.
Thomas Lennon
We're starting terrible rumors.
Nick
The ADD in this room is out of control. We got, guys.
Thomas Lennon
By the way, I just looked at Danny Thomas's real name and I thought I had a stroke. Can you go down to Danny Thomas's real name?
Nick
Oh, one thing at a time.
Thomas Lennon
Just go down. Oh, wow, that's a lot Scrabble and I could never make anything out of it. I didn't know I could have made that with it.
Nick
That feels like a terrorist.
Thomas Lennon
That's a name.
Nick
Yeah.
Mark
That's some Ellis Island. What's your name? Let's go with Danny Thomas.
Nick
Abu Wazu. Yakub Karaz is dead. Died like a dog.
Mark
Which, by the way, that's not how dogs die. Dogs get euthanized. They get put down.
Nick
Right, right.
Mark
Don't get just bombed to death.
Thomas Lennon
This is not true either. We're just doing this. There is no known public scam.
Nick
How do you know? People do things to the word poop. Oh, no.
Thomas Lennon
Who paid for this? So if. I guess if you throw money at it, you don't have to.
Nick
All right. See, he controls his own Wikipedia.
Thomas Lennon
Clearly, you can't put stuff in your Wikipedia.
Mark
When is Trading Places gonna be a thing, you think? Like, when do you think it's gonna actually preview?
Thomas Lennon
What we just did was the, like, reading scene. Broadway's a whole thing. There's, like, 40 theaters, but they're only owned by, like, three organizations, so, you know, the mafia is five.
Nick
Wow.
Thomas Lennon
But Broadway's three.
Mark
Damn.
Thomas Lennon
There's just not that many yeah.
Nick
So Titanic is killing it.
Thomas Lennon
I hear it's great. I hear it's really good.
Mark
Seems fun.
Nick
My wife loved it.
Thomas Lennon
I saw. Did you see? I saw Operation Mincemeat. One of the best musicals I've ever seen.
Mark
Wow.
Nick
Pull it up.
Thomas Lennon
Pull it up.
Nick
Never heard of this. Is this a gay code? How would you never see.
Mark
Straight up the street, like, we gotta go.
Nick
A lot of things.
Mark
I heard the new Death of a Salesman is unreal.
Nick
Oh, really?
Mark
I hear it's unreal.
Thomas Lennon
Lost Boys is one of the coolest things I've ever.
Mark
I've heard. That's amazing.
Thomas Lennon
One of the coolest things I've ever seen.
Nick
All right.
Thomas Lennon
In my life. That show Mincemeat, I just said the other day, it's incredible. But Lost Boys, Tony, you think they fly around in Lost Boys?
Nick
I would hope so.
Thomas Lennon
They do.
Nick
Whoa.
Thomas Lennon
Do they fly around. So unbelievable how much they fly around in Lost Boys. You'll feel like you're hallucinating.
Mark
I took my niece to Book a Mormon a couple months ago.
Thomas Lennon
She's 13.
Mark
I don't know. How do you feel about it? I think it's great. I love it. I wonder how much she got. As I'm watching, I'm like, does a 13 year old. She's super smart, but does this 13
Thomas Lennon
year old fully get this?
Nick
We got.
Thomas Lennon
My wife's very Baptist parents to Book of Mormon and I was a little worried about how it was going to go. Right. When you get to Hasadiga Ibiwai and stuff.
Mark
Yes.
Nick
I was like, bam.
Thomas Lennon
That was tight.
Mark
That was good. That is the greatest song, though. I mean, incredible.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
No, no. Knock on Lost Boys. I like the film, but how did they decide to make this amusement? What goes through the. The channels and the grinder to God?
Thomas Lennon
You're gonna love it. Especially if you're on Grindr, because there's some. There's some sexy dudes, but you know what I mean?
Nick
There's a billion movies from 30 years ago. How do they decide that one will make money?
Thomas Lennon
You're gonna like it.
Nick
I know how they get that to.
Thomas Lennon
Everybody's flying around and their shirts are kind of a little bit oily. I don't know. Jury's still out on me, I guess. I don't know.
Nick
That's true. Red wine.
Mark
You're a cultured straight. That's what it is. A cultured straight. Mustache seems a little gay, but that's. I think that's a good thing.
Nick
Yeah. Very.
Thomas Lennon
Guys, what are we talking about? Great old rumors about people well, you live in Wisconsin. I live. We mostly live in Wisconsin. Yeah. We still have a house in Los Angeles that we go to sometimes but didn't burn down. Quality of life knock on. I haven't seen it.
Mark
Well, part of Wisconsin.
Thomas Lennon
We live at a place called Lake Geneva, Wisconsin.
Nick
Oh, very nice.
Thomas Lennon
90 minutes from Chicago.
Mark
Oh, wow.
Thomas Lennon
It's a sweet little spot. And you know, people rag on it as the. It's the. The place that Chicago people go in Wisconsin.
Nick
Right.
Thomas Lennon
But that's. That's me too. I'm a Chicago person.
Mark
I love Chicago.
Thomas Lennon
Across the lake for me is the Wrigleys. You got people like that, but you get sweet spot.
Nick
Oh, the gum fortune.
Thomas Lennon
Yep.
Nick
Whoa.
Thomas Lennon
They used to own the Cubs for a long time. Yep.
Nick
Look what you get two months out of the year out of this. With content.
Thomas Lennon
We actually live there a lot. It's beautiful. But you gotta. If you're gonna go there. That's. That house is.
Nick
That's called Teddy Murphy's bigger.
Thomas Lennon
That's called, uh, Stone Manor.
Nick
Cool.
Thomas Lennon
On the roof there. Yeah.
Nick
It's a cool place.
Thomas Lennon
It looks a lot like, uh. Yeah, that's. That's down the lake from me.
Nick
Wow.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
But of all the places. What are you? Chicago guy?
Thomas Lennon
I'm a Chicago guy.
Nick
There we go.
Thomas Lennon
So we grew up Chicago and then I. This is the lake I grew up to going to as a kid. That's a stone manor. Oh, one of the big old spooky house. It's probably the spookiest house on the lake.
Nick
Beautiful.
Thomas Lennon
There's stuff that's less spooky.
Nick
Mm.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. You can go to lake your name and see more. You picked one really spooky looking house.
Nick
Really pretty.
Thomas Lennon
That's a boat called the lady of the lake draws her. Yeah. It's a sweet little spot. Yeah. We actually love being there in the winter. But you just have to be. The lake freezes and you got to be okay with the idea that, you know, for a couple weeks at a time It'll be like 15 below for a couple of weeks.
Mark
That's crazy.
Nick
That's when you go to la.
Thomas Lennon
I like it.
Nick
Oh, really like it.
Mark
You like the cold?
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. Get some writing done.
Mark
I'm not. See, I'm not against it here either.
Thomas Lennon
Window.
Mark
I'm okay with the winter.
Thomas Lennon
I like it.
Mark
Yeah. But 15 below is tough.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
But I get.
Thomas Lennon
I get a good. I like. I love to stare out a window, you know.
Nick
Sure.
Thomas Lennon
And get, you know, get a little sad, you know. I like the Smiths and stuff.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Same I'm a good window starer. Think about, you know, the way things with. How are you feeling?
Producer
Morrissey's hosting the. The final act of the CBGB's Fest.
Thomas Lennon
CBGS is having one show and he's doing. Is he doing 20 minutes of stand up?
Producer
And he's doing.
Thomas Lennon
They're gonna tell you some. Another thing about. About the dog meat festivals.
Nick
Number five. Hey, you're all wrong.
Thomas Lennon
None of which would get me on Saturday's night.
Nick
You know the famous Morrissey stories.
Thomas Lennon
You see a lot of famous horses.
Nick
Well, apparently he's.
Thomas Lennon
I've met him a couple times.
Nick
Very horrible to work with. There's that story where.
Thomas Lennon
I don't know that. Hold on, he said, trying to extricate himself from this part. I've never heard that specifically, he said. And then he leaned back, the microphone away a little bit.
Nick
It's all me again, not.
Thomas Lennon
I don't know anything about this.
Nick
So there's that old story where he's on the tour bus. They're pulled up to somewhere, I don't know, Detroit Big theater. Says Morrissey on it. They missed. They took 1s out. They misspelled it. And he said, keep on driving. Sold out. Around the corner. They drove by in the bus. 1s was off. And he said it. Keep driving.
Mark
My own agent misspells my name.
Nick
Yeah, me too. They call me Mike.
Thomas Lennon
There's two S's, people. Yeah, two R's. Two S's. So I feel like that's justified, though, a little bit. Well, come on.
Nick
I just agree.
Thomas Lennon
Pay attention to the details.
Nick
Sure.
Thomas Lennon
You fucked up the marquee. What's it going to be like back? Yeah, could be bad.
Nick
All right, we get it. You like Morsi.
Mark
You're a window stare.
Thomas Lennon
Defend him on a lot of weird stuff.
Nick
What else you got for Boris?
Thomas Lennon
Oh, no, no, no. I don't. I've met him twice, and he was absolutely. Couldn't have been nicer.
Nick
Okay, okay, again, I don't know if this is true.
Thomas Lennon
Couldn't have been nicer to.
Mark
No, we have. We have some areas where we will not delve into.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, yeah.
Mark
You trash a nick. I'm like, I can't.
Thomas Lennon
Not gonna trash the Knicks, even though I'm from Chicago. And it was kind of fun for me because I lived in New York from the late 80s through all of the 90s. And I just want to thank the Knicks, specifically Ken Marino. He's got a picture coming out called Gail Daughtry and the Celebrity Sex Pass.
Nick
Funny guy.
Mark
I love Camarino.
Thomas Lennon
We love Camarino, but we gotta get.
Mark
We tell him to come on here. We're fans.
Thomas Lennon
One thing that was really great is being a Chicago person and a Bulls fan during that era, during the 90s in New York, is. It was like my second job because Ken Marino would always, always bet on the Knicks, no matter what. Like, it didn't matter. Like, you know, you guys had Starks and you had everybody and you. I used to do a John Starks impression when I was this shopping bag, grocery. I was the best. I decided I would be the best shopping bagger that there ever was.
Mark
It's too high. He's too high.
Thomas Lennon
Too high.
Nick
Pull up Stark. I gotta hear Stark stuff.
Mark
No, he's lower than this.
Thomas Lennon
I don't think so.
Nick
Okay, let's hear about John Stark.
Thomas Lennon
Okay. Okay. Your money back.
Nick
You might be right about the SNL audition.
Mark
Lord Michaels. Why is he closing with Starks? What the hell is this?
Nick
Starks, Morrissey. We gotta update these.
Mark
And the way he pushed his teammates,
Nick
it's deeper to rise to his level.
Thomas Lennon
I think he's doing it wrong now. Well, he's fucking not as good at it as he used to be.
Mark
He's the nicest dude, too, by the way.
Thomas Lennon
He's great. He's a lovely guy.
Mark
But I had a rough one at a gig at MSG once for the nypd. And as I'm leaving, he put his arm on me. He's like, that was hilarious. When Starks does that, you're like, all right, I don't feel that bad.
Nick
That's great. No question is a happy time for me.
Mark
It's a little higher.
Thomas Lennon
No question.
Mark
Make me sad. It didn't make me sad.
Thomas Lennon
Like, guys, I tell you what, at this point in my life, I'm not going to put any more work into my Johnstar. I'm calling it. I'm considering it. Perfect. I'm going to let it exist the way it exists for space and time. Anyway, so. So it was a great era because, you know, the feeling is that the Knicks were always with Ewing and everybody gonna. Gonna finally beat the Bulls at some point. And guess what happened? You didn't.
Nick
It was. I remember so great. 90s bulls were unstoppable.
Thomas Lennon
Well, Jordan would have the flu and he'd score 55.
Nick
Damn.
Thomas Lennon
It was crazy.
Mark
He's the Goat. I mean, it was crazy. Jordan, Pippen, Rodman. It was unfair.
Thomas Lennon
I met Pippen.
Mark
How was Pippin?
Nick
You bang his wife?
Producer
Great.
Thomas Lennon
That great. Here's what it is. And I'm on the Record here.
Mark
Jordan son.
Thomas Lennon
I'm moving the mic for yourself as I talk about my relationship.
Mark
Jordan son married her.
Nick
What?
Mark
Seven rings.
Thomas Lennon
Is that true? That is. Is that.
Mark
He did.
Thomas Lennon
Is that true?
Mark
He did.
Nick
Yeah.
Mark
I think they got divorced.
Thomas Lennon
I thought I heard that too, but she's a. Look, I met. I met. Here's. Here's what happened. I met Scotty Pippen because we were both in first class on United.
Nick
Nice.
Thomas Lennon
Well, let me clarify. Fine. For me, I'm in first class, but he's Scotty fucking Peppin and he's like six, eight. Shouldn't Scotty be on some nicer than what Lieutenant Dangles on? I think he should. I think he should be like. I assure you, there's no chance Dangle's bumping into Jordan anywhere I go.
Nick
Right.
Thomas Lennon
He's at nicer places than I'm allowed. Scottie Piven and I are allowed at all the exact same places. Which is a sad sign about the contracts he had to sign.
Mark
He got fucked over.
Thomas Lennon
He got fucked. Because now he has to live like me. An ordinary.
Mark
He's not broke. He's. I mean, he's. But he got. He got a big deal with the Blazers at the end. But a lot of Jordan's money is from the shoe deal. I mean, that's Jordan's.
Thomas Lennon
Jordan's basketball was never even. It was a drop in the bucket.
Mark
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
I mean, he had armor. He had. What was the hot dogs. He had Jockey, Nike.
Nick
Oh, yeah. He had a restaurant or two. Bunch of steakhouse.
Mark
Steakhouse.
Nick
A cologne.
Thomas Lennon
He had a bunch of steakhouses. What was the hot dog? He had.
Nick
He had a hot dog.
Thomas Lennon
Jordan had a hot dog.
Nick
Pull it up.
Thomas Lennon
Show to me. Hot dog ads. Bam.
Producer
Michael Jordan ballpark Franks.
Nick
No way.
Thomas Lennon
They plump when you cook them.
Nick
Was he Sprite too, or am I racist?
Thomas Lennon
You are definitely McDonald's. Both could be true.
Nick
That's true.
Thomas Lennon
The fact that you are probably are racist.
Nick
Good point.
Thomas Lennon
They pump when you cook them. Michael Jordan.
Producer
Wow.
Thomas Lennon
Ballpark Franks would get a little. They get a little excited when you cook them.
Nick
Did he do milk as well or am I gay?
Producer
Yes and yes.
Nick
Thank you.
Thomas Lennon
They're not. I remember the month for this wine, by the way.
Nick
Oh yeah, this is good wine.
Thomas Lennon
It's actually true. This is Mikhail. Yeah, yeah. He doesn't around at all.
Nick
Yeah, no, no.
Mark
He called us out. I think we had like a shitty selection. And since then we've upped our game.
Nick
That's true.
Thomas Lennon
He sent you this? No. You got Ewing.
Mark
I loved Ewing so much.
Thomas Lennon
Dude. We all love Ewing.
Mark
You know, that's the thing too. It's not all about winning. Like, it's better not be. No, but. But as a kid, there's value in loving a thing that doesn't work out.
Nick
That's true.
Thomas Lennon
There is the 90s Knicks. But the 90s Knicks, well, here's the thing about them. They're a magnificent team.
Nick
They were awesome.
Thomas Lennon
But then there had to be something that could come along to be the foil of a team that amazing.
Mark
Jordan was. It just was unfortunate to be going against the greatest ever. It was great. I mean, Barkley missed out. Stockton, Malone, all these great players missed out. Malone did not miss out on impregnating a 12 year old, but he missed out on a championship. Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
With Rodman recently. You did? Yeah.
Nick
Whoa.
Mark
First class United.
Nick
No, Coach.
Thomas Lennon
UN United plus economy plus. I was actually just sitting on Carmen Elector's lap.
Mark
How was Rodman?
Thomas Lennon
If you go to maybe who posted it? Maybe Weird Al. There's a picture of me. Weird Al Rodman.
Mark
Holy.
Thomas Lennon
Jared Polecki and Jennifer Gray.
Nick
That's a fever dream.
Thomas Lennon
It should be.
Mark
And Richard Gere's hamster.
Thomas Lennon
And obviously not. Not pictured, but there it was. But Rodman, it's hard to put into. There's a photo somewhere. It's gonna.
Nick
It'll turn up images. Boom. No, there's you and Weird Al.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
No, no, Patton.
Thomas Lennon
No, no, it'll be. It's probably on Al's. I don't know where it was. Somebody's Instagram.
Nick
Private Instagram, but.
Thomas Lennon
Oh, that's Lake Geneva again. There's me now on my boat.
Nick
Whoa.
Mark
It's Weird Al, the man.
Thomas Lennon
He's the man.
Nick
I met him once. He probably the nicest guy.
Thomas Lennon
You seem probably the nicest guy.
Nick
Sweet guy. We Zinged him because it was. I did Opie and Anthony with him and everybody Zinged him. He's like, what are you doing, guys?
Thomas Lennon
What are you singing?
Nick
You know, why are you being so mean? We're like, you're like a nice, normal guy. We're animals.
Producer
Yeah.
Mark
Every other word on that show is ugh.
Nick
Yeah, I know. He was like, what are you guys so mean for?
Thomas Lennon
Rodman's interesting because, like, you know, he's 6, 7 and he still acts exactly kind of like the Rodman you're thinking about. Yeah. He has not like, he hasn't like, mellowed.
Nick
I like that a lot. Well, he's hanging out with Gigi Ping or no Kim Jong Un.
Thomas Lennon
Oh, yeah.
Producer
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
He's the only guy who Ever gets to go to North Korea.
Mark
Apparently he brought a bunch of players with him on that one trip.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
Oh, really? Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Didn't they make a. They made like a.
Nick
A music video.
Thomas Lennon
There was a news show about him going to.
Nick
My ex girlfriend had a huge crush on him. Dennis had to break up with her, right?
Thomas Lennon
Dennis was. Didn't. Madonna dated Dennis?
Nick
Of course.
Mark
Madonna and Pippin.
Thomas Lennon
Elektra.
Nick
Elektra.
Thomas Lennon
Wait, did Madonna date Pippin?
Mark
I think they hooked up.
Thomas Lennon
Can we have footage of that?
Producer
Mark, can you tell me about that?
Thomas Lennon
I could watch that.
Producer
Rodman's father.
Nick
No.
Mark
Absent father, right?
Producer
No.
Nick
Oh, yeah. Philanderer.
Producer
His name is Philanderer. He has something.
Thomas Lennon
His name is not Philander.
Producer
Like 24 kids by 19 women.
Nick
I think it's. Yeah. 20 kids.
Producer
Christian name is Philander.
Thomas Lennon
That's impossible. I'll look it up. That is impossible.
Nick
Things could be true.
Mark
This sounds like a Charles Lauden type of story right here.
Thomas Lennon
Let's see. I forgot about the smiley face hair. That was genius. The weird smiley face. You know that. Remember that guy Philander?
Mark
Not Philander.
Thomas Lennon
Philander's close.
Nick
Yeah, that's up there.
Thomas Lennon
Do you guys know that stupid sex. Remember Rodman left and just went to Vegas for a while.
Mark
20 children. And it was so cool that they just let him do it. They were like, he just needs.
Thomas Lennon
I have a theory about it.
Mark
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
I have a theory about why they let Dennis do everything they let Dennis do. And it makes. It makes a lot of sense. Like when there's a guy on the other team that people think is crazy. Like, that's so helpful.
Nick
Sure.
Thomas Lennon
Like, imagine like. So when even the Bulls are like, hey, Dennis is crazy. We can't control him. So imagine how you feel if you're the Knicks and you're like, yeah. If he won't listen to Phil Jackson and Jordan and Pippen and anybody else, and he'll just off like, watch out for that guy. That point doesn't fucking care.
Mark
And you got to let a guy that crazy be crazy.
Producer
That'd be great.
Thomas Lennon
Says, let him be so crazy. There we go.
Nick
Wedding dress.
Thomas Lennon
Look at how little I am next to little Rodman.
Nick
Oh, you're cute.
Thomas Lennon
Look at me.
Mark
What a crew.
Thomas Lennon
That is a fucking possum.
Nick
Who's the white guy with the Jennifer Gray?
Thomas Lennon
Is it me or Jennifer Gray? There's three white guys in the picture
Nick
that I can write that I've never heard of.
Thomas Lennon
That's Jared. He's the most famous guy in the photo by far. Who's that guy's Jared Poleck. He's from a show called Supernatural. They have their own fan conventions just for that show.
Nick
Oh, wow.
Mark
I don't know it.
Thomas Lennon
We watch it at home. We call it Ghost Hunks because it's two guys looking for ghosts, and they're hunky as.
Nick
I love it.
Thomas Lennon
Really, really dreamy.
Nick
You're not gay enough.
Mark
Father. 29 children with 16 different women. See it? Take that.
Nick
Nick Cannon and Elon. That's more than both.
Thomas Lennon
I did not know anything about this, and I did read Bad as I Want to Be.
Mark
How is that?
Thomas Lennon
It's a terrific book. Dennis's book.
Mark
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. He talks about sitting outside the palace at Auburn Hills with a shotgun in his mouth in the car.
Nick
Damn.
Thomas Lennon
Whoa. He had some really troubled moments.
Nick
You never hear about the dark side. You always think, oh, what a cool life.
Thomas Lennon
You always think, dennis seems fine. You always look at Dennis, you're like, you know what? If anything, he seems fine.
Nick
Right.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Mark
But there's a beauty to that selfless type of player, the guy who's just like, I don't need the ball. I'm just gonna run amok.
Thomas Lennon
Imagine if you're fighting for a ball.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
With that guy.
Mark
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Let him have it.
Mark
Yeah.
Nick
Yeah.
Mark
As a kid, too. Like, no, take my toy.
Nick
Like, he's got green hair and a nose ring.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. Dennis has proven that he. It doesn't. Like, he's got bigger stuff on his mind.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
As opposed to bonking his head with you.
Nick
Right.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
Well, we all had that friend in high school, when you got into a fistfight, he would go break a bottle over his head, and everybody else is like, oh, geez, all right, I'm not going.
Thomas Lennon
You can't fight. You can't really fight crazy.
Nick
Can't fight crazy. Which you could say Trump is a little of that. But Iran's crazy too, so they're like it. We'll go. After you.
Mark
Yeah. Both reality stars. Both a little. Pretty much crazy. Both kind of peaked in the early days.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Was Dennis ever on? Dennis must have been on.
Nick
He was on something. He must have.
Thomas Lennon
He was on the Apprentice Trump show, Right?
Mark
I think. I think so.
Thomas Lennon
There's no way Dennis was not on that show. Had to be. Right.
Nick
I could see them getting along. Meatloaf was if he likes Kim Jong Un.
Thomas Lennon
Dennis was. Yeah. Season eight.
Nick
Bam. Did he win camp? What was he.
Thomas Lennon
How do you do you win? Yeah.
Producer
Misspelled Trump's name.
Thomas Lennon
He famously misspelled Melania Morrison. He made memorable firings. Oh, he misspelled Melania's name.
Nick
Oh, we got to rewatch that season.
Producer
Invited back for season 13.
Nick
Wow, that ran that well.
Mark
Speaking of, was it NBC? Was the show with Matthew Perry, the Odd Couple?
Thomas Lennon
Was that NBC Odd Couple on cbs?
Mark
Cbs?
Nick
What, they remade that?
Thomas Lennon
I was. Not only did they remake it, I was in it.
Nick
You were? Which one?
Thomas Lennon
Felix Unger, number five.
Nick
How's that work?
Thomas Lennon
Let's see the play.
Nick
Oh, Matthau.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, the play is. It goes Jack Lemmon. There's the play.
Nick
The movie. The TV show from the 70s.
Thomas Lennon
Black Odd Couple. My Odd Couple.
Nick
What was the Black.
Thomas Lennon
The Black Odd Couple? Yeah, it was called Black Odd Couple.
Nick
Wait, really?
Thomas Lennon
It's called the New Odd Couple. Did you go to New Go New.
Mark
But everything is ripped off. The Odd Couple, like, even though. Even a great show, like.
Nick
That's a good point. There you go.
Thomas Lennon
There's the new Odd Couple.
Mark
Wow.
Thomas Lennon
So I'm on. I'm. I would be the guy. I'm the guy. I'm the mustache one.
Nick
Yeah, yeah. The almost gay one.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, even. But still. Even. Even in the one I was in, I'm still the almost gay one. I'm Felix even.
Nick
Right here.
Producer
Is that Lamont?
Thomas Lennon
That is, yes.
Nick
What? From San Francisco? It is on the right.
Producer
And that's the guy from.
Thomas Lennon
Correct.
Producer
Barney Miller on the left.
Thomas Lennon
Yes. Yeah. No, that was a fun run. We did like, three half seasons of the Odd Couple.
Nick
How cool is Matthew Perry? He's a funny guy.
Thomas Lennon
We had a great time. We were very close. Well, we did that. We did a movie called 17 Again Together.
Nick
Easy.
Thomas Lennon
We did. Nobody remembers that. I did. Did a couple episodes of Friends with Matt.
Nick
Did you?
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
Wow.
Thomas Lennon
I'm Joey's hand twin. Oh, you remember. I'm Joey's hand twin. Pull up, Joey's hand twin. I was in the Friends reunion.
Nick
How you doing, hand twin?
Thomas Lennon
Yep.
Mark
What was it like with Matthew Perry?
Thomas Lennon
We had a lot of fun. I mean, Matty's a complicated guy.
Nick
I.
Thomas Lennon
You know, we. He. You know, there's always ups and downs with Matty, but, like, when he was in his. I mean, he, you know, like, Matty wanted to be, like, a serious playwright. And he was, like, kind of a. He was a heavier personality than a lot of people I know. I mean, his, like, if left to his own devices, I think he would be like, mostly just kind of writing slightly sad plays, like, this is real vibe. And then he kind of accidentally became a tv, you know, like a primetime heartthrob.
Nick
Yeah. You know, dated Julia Roberts, for Pete's sake.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, yeah. He was dating Julia Roberts when she was working. I know that he was dating her when she was working on her Irish accent for. For Michael Collins from one of those pictures.
Mark
Ah, it's like the worst time to date her.
Nick
Yeah. You don't want to.
Producer
Was his father in the business?
Thomas Lennon
Matty's dad is, I thought, like a Canadian news guy or something.
Nick
Ah.
Thomas Lennon
I think of his stepdad is. His stepdad is the famous guy. Anyway, we had a lot of fun, all right. We both smoked cigarettes at the time. We smoked a million cigarettes together.
Nick
I could see that.
Thomas Lennon
Do you like smoking cigarettes in a Porsche?
Nick
Wow.
Thomas Lennon
We did a lot of it.
Nick
How fun was LA back then? Portion around 90s LA must have been the tip top.
Thomas Lennon
Knocking, burning darts in a Porsche. Yeah, we had a lot of fun.
Nick
Yeah. Do you worry about tv, the state of TV movies and all that?
Thomas Lennon
No.
Nick
You're not worried?
Thomas Lennon
Nah.
Nick
You don't think it's shifted?
Mark
Well, you've had a lot of success. I mean, you wrote. I don't know if everyone listening knows. He wrote Night at the Museum, which is. That's.
Nick
You did.
Mark
It's a huge movie.
Thomas Lennon
Whoa.
Nick
They made three movies.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. There's actually a fourth animated one, and apparently there's gonna be a fifth.
Nick
That's insane.
Thomas Lennon
But, you know, I. Everybody's worried about everything, but. Yeah, and I worry about stuff too. But then I also don't worry about it because it's like, you know, like when TV was invented, people worried about that and.
Nick
Yeah, it's like, good point.
Thomas Lennon
You know, and then they're like, oh, some of the people buying studios are evil. And I'm like, well, I worked for the people that used to own studios. Weren't the nicest people in the world either. So it's like, what. Where? You know, so you're optimistic, I'm optimistic, and everything sorts itself out.
Nick
I like that.
Thomas Lennon
It's refreshing mostly, you know, and all you can do is keep doing good stuff. So you're here, you can keep trying to do good work.
Nick
And can we pull up his resume just some way?
Thomas Lennon
My resume. If you go to IMDb, it looks like a charades game of, like, a crazy person.
Nick
Right.
Thomas Lennon
There's no logic to, like, I'm in two Merchant Ivory movies.
Nick
Jesus.
Thomas Lennon
But I'm also in Boat Trip.
Mark
Is that Cuba Gooding Jr. Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
I'm also in a low divorce. I'm also into Jerry seinfeld.
Nick
That's right.
Producer
11 photos I'm gonna go through.
Thomas Lennon
I get a little, little, little. Oh, that's a picture called. That's a Mike Jan picture also from the state. That's a Mike Jan movie called Organ Trail. Oh, very scary sort of western by Michael Patrick Jan from the state director also of. Of. Oh, you got 317 photos of me.
Producer
I'm only at 13 here.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, let's just keep. We'll just keep fucking going through and I'll try to remember any of them.
Nick
Oh, is that Rose Byrne?
Thomas Lennon
That's a show called the Big Leap on Fox. That was great. Same, same.
Mark
You've been on a lot of shows that went. But a lot of shows that haven't gone wrecked. Well, I mean, what's that like? When you really believe in something and you're just like, that's it.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. I mean, I've been in shows that were canceled at the table read also.
Nick
Really?
Thomas Lennon
Oh, I'm. I'm doing a little too much in Friends. I feel like there. Look at that face. I'm doing too much. I'm doing too much. Turn it down. That is some cheesy. Those. I'm early in Hollywood. I haven't really been there that long because I should be. I could be doing less.
Nick
Any audition tips? I can't nail an audition to save my life.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, no, that is Hancock. Oh, that was fun.
Mark
Anything you auditioned for that you were like, I really wish I got it. And it went everything level. Which. Which is one that you thought you were. What's one that you were really close?
Thomas Lennon
Positive I was gonna be for like a couple months. It seemed very likely that I was going to be Ford Prefect in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Oh, then I was not. Yeah. The guy who got it was most deaf and he's excellent in it. But I confused you too.
Mark
All the time.
Thomas Lennon
I know we have. We're endlessly circling the same projects, but he's very good in the picture. But it was weird because I was positive I had it.
Nick
That's the worst times.
Thomas Lennon
You're positive you have it and then you know what?
Nick
You don't totally.
Thomas Lennon
You don't. Rodman gets scurries away with it and you're like, ah. But no, there's. I mean, every. Most auditions are heartbreaks.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
You know.
Nick
Damn.
Thomas Lennon
I just. I mean, I found out. I saw that I was on the list of, you know, people to consider for the Michael Scott role in the Office, which I never knew was true and they never saw me or anything. But there's a memo, I guess it's in the book about the Office and I was like, oh, that would have been neat.
Mark
That's cool.
Thomas Lennon
But I'm happy with my life.
Mark
Yeah. Who else is on that list?
Thomas Lennon
A lot of cool people. Lots of cool people were on that list.
Mark
Wasn't Bob Odenkirk on that?
Thomas Lennon
For sure?
Nick
He was.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, sure on that list. And he might have actually been in. In Paul Diamatti.
Nick
Wow.
Thomas Lennon
A lot of people were on that list.
Nick
Martin Short.
Thomas Lennon
That seems like that would have been an odd choice, even though he.
Nick
I mean, he's a big. I think.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. It's almost like he's almost too famous to play that.
Nick
I watched his documentary, and he talks about how showbiz is 95% failure. Just audition after audition, movies flopping.
Thomas Lennon
For me, it's about 99, right? Yeah. If you're hitting 95, you're killing it.
Mark
Is there anything. Is there anything you passed on that you almost never.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, it's almost never happened. Like, pretty much never. It would have to be so. I mean, I'm in the. I'm in Puppet Master, the Littlest Reich. So, like, if I'm gonna be in that Reich, I'm in Puppet Master, the Littlest Reich. If I'm in that, what wouldn't I be? Yeah, like, almost.
Nick
You know, you're on this podcast.
Thomas Lennon
I was doing my garment shopping. Anyway. I'm always. I'm usually in the garment district on.
Nick
You got a glass of wine out of it?
Thomas Lennon
I got almost a whole glass of wine that was picked by Joe McHale and actually. Really solid.
Mark
Really good.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, really.
Mark
So is there any type of thing that you haven't done yet that you really want to do?
Thomas Lennon
Well, the Broadway thing was one. I've written a couple novels. That was pretty cool.
Nick
You're busy out there, Wisconsin.
Thomas Lennon
From my life. From the outside, I guess it must look like I feel busy. To me, it's always like, why am I not doing more?
Nick
You know, I get that on the
Thomas Lennon
inside, it always feels like you're not doing quite enough.
Nick
I would say in comedy, we do more in a year than most people do in 20 years, probably. Yes. The traveling, travel, meeting people, staying friendly.
Thomas Lennon
Do. We did.
Mark
We've done the road for the last, like, 15 years. How hard we've been on the road was, like, pretty crazy. I'm in every town, but I love it. I. I really love it.
Thomas Lennon
It is one of the hardest kind of lifestyles, too.
Nick
Oh, definitely.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Mark
But it's also so rewarding. It's so fun.
Thomas Lennon
It can't. Yeah, it is. It's a real high yeah, yeah.
Mark
But like, to build. To build a home life. It's hard, is. Yeah.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
I kind of stopped doing stand up once I realized how I really liked it. I don't know if I was good at it, but I like doing it. But it's the kind of thing where it is not super conducive to, like, being home and being.
Nick
You got that right now. Yeah. I got a baby boy, and it's a lot.
Thomas Lennon
Very tough.
Mark
Do you have a kid?
Thomas Lennon
I do. My son is 16 now.
Nick
You're right. In the masturbation era.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
Yeah.
Mark
He seems pretty.
Thomas Lennon
I don't know.
Nick
I don't hide it well.
Mark
You hope they hide it.
Nick
Yeah, that would suck.
Mark
He's like. Yeah, he's jerking off a lot.
Nick
We've been.
Mark
We've been walking in on it.
Thomas Lennon
But yeah, it's like, it's tough because, like, the, you know, comedy is just always someplace where there's tons of booze and people want to hang out. And you're like, dangle, pick, man. I'll sit on your shoulder. Just like everybody, like, wants to.
Mark
You know, that's how this pod started is we were just drinking buddies. People want to come back in the day.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
You know, and you hang out less. So you do a pod.
Thomas Lennon
Right. And then you get. We get to meet folks.
Nick
There you go.
Mark
But it's cool.
Thomas Lennon
And watch. We get to watch all of Raw after this.
Mark
Is there anyone you really want to work with who you haven't worked with?
Thomas Lennon
I don't know. I mean, I keep. I like. The weird thing about me is I kind of like. I like doing all the different jobs.
Nick
Yeah. The variety is fun.
Thomas Lennon
Like, that's what keeps me at doing this. I think it's very good to diversify the stuff that you do. Like, I. As soon as I'm like, I'm never. I don't ever want to be Work and write movies again because it sucks.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
And it's a nightmare. And then you write a novel and you're like, you know, what I want to do is I want to adapt this book back into a movie. And then, like, it's just. It's good to diversify because there is so much heartbreak in movies and theater and TV and comedy. Like, so much of it is just, you know, shitty.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
That. It's good to diversify that heartbreak a little bit, you know, and have. Have eggs in some different baskets sometimes.
Nick
We wrote a movie and we're trying to get it.
Mark
I think we're shooting in July, which
Thomas Lennon
you're Just going to do it.
Mark
We got independent financing, so we got lucky. It's very hard to pitch stuff now. You waste like six months pitching. So we went to independent financing. We got it.
Thomas Lennon
But me and Marino pitched two things last year that were like, slam fucking done, like to the top. They seemed amazing. And you find out eight days later in an email, they're like, oh, no, no. They, they didn't want to say wait.
Mark
And there's not even like a big like, oh, like, no, no, I'm sorry.
Thomas Lennon
Used to be like the, the, the person you pitched to would call you and tell you why it didn't work.
Nick
Although I got. It's not for us.
Thomas Lennon
Or at least they would say something. But we've, we've now we're in an era of everybody's so used to being ghosted and ghosting people that like, you can go pitch a high level studio executive and you will never hear about it again.
Nick
That's true.
Thomas Lennon
At all.
Nick
Yeah, yeah.
Thomas Lennon
It's fucking rude.
Nick
It's weird.
Thomas Lennon
It's weird.
Nick
I just pitched a kind of a reality show page of stage and everybody passed on it eventually.
Thomas Lennon
Did but tell you they passed or did you ask? You had to ask.
Nick
And then I said to my manager, why'd they pass? And she was like, I don't know. And so I emailed them and I said, why? I don't know.
Mark
Job to know.
Nick
So I got the why now from them and they said, well, it's too niche, blah blah. I was like, okay, thank you. That's all I need to know.
Thomas Lennon
But it actually having closure and stuff like that, it's also the way that like the world should work.
Mark
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Like if people don't like the idea that you have say why?
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Don't just be like, I'm never speaking to them ever again.
Nick
Exactly.
Thomas Lennon
I will never speak to them. Like, just fucking say what you didn't like.
Nick
I know, but that's why the Internet is so it's fun because if you get a big pop on the Internet, you go, you could have had that. Yep.
Mark
I mean that was our careers. I mean you talk about kind of being like the anti SNL in the 90s, but we were, you know, with stand up specials we got passed on by everyone and we put our shit on YouTube and it just kind of changed our lives. Of course.
Nick
So way better and now.
Thomas Lennon
But I mean for the, you know, for the reference, when we went to do the like Marina 911 at Quibi. What? Quibi Katzenberg's little thing that he wanted to do with the.
Mark
Oh, we remember. Yeah, we got Pat. We got Our idea got passed on by Quibi.
Nick
Yeah, true.
Thomas Lennon
You poor things.
Mark
Yeah, we had a loaded shotgun in our mouth after that outside. Quibby said no.
Thomas Lennon
We were also the stadium at Auburn Hills. But the. The what they. They showed us what they were trying to compete with. And it wasn't with Netflix and it wasn't with the movie studios and it wasn't with TV. It was with YouTube. They were trying to compete with YouTube because the eyeballs, if you look at eyeball charts, like Netflix is amazing. It's YouTube's here.
Nick
Is that right?
Thomas Lennon
The chart is goes. You can't see the chart anymore.
Nick
Whoa. Pull it up.
Thomas Lennon
YouTube. Just do YouTube versus Netflix eyeballs like eyeballs or View. It's crazy.
Mark
But to talk about like your optimism, it's like you don't know what's going to pop for you. You don't know what's going to hit. So just have a shitload of plates spinning. Yes. Care about all those plates.
Nick
Yes.
Thomas Lennon
Viewer. Viewers. Viewership. Yeah.
Mark
But we didn't know. I mean, I felt failure doing that.
Nick
Yeah, I know. So did I. But it worked out. That's kind of how it goes sometimes.
Thomas Lennon
All 13% of all television screening in the United States is YouTube.
Nick
13% of all. Wow. 2 billion monthly. That's logged in too.
Thomas Lennon
So like 1/4 of the planet is watching YouTube.
Nick
Yowza.
Thomas Lennon
Well, Netflix has 8 or 9%. That's pretty fucking great. Yeah, but they're 5, 4 to 5% under YouTube. So you've gone right to put your thing on the thing that. I mean, it's like.
Nick
But you can't compete with YouTube. Everyone's uploading every second. Netflix. You have to wait for the new thing. Hey, here's the new special. Here's the new movie out. I feel like YouTube, there's always something new on YouTube.
Thomas Lennon
I will say that's one thing about watching YouTube stuff is sometimes you feel like, hey, this is filler. You just put this out today because you had to put out something today. And you can feel that sometimes, which I miss.
Mark
Like when you ever watch a movie from the 40s and it's like 90 minutes and airtight dialogue. Perfect. And now, I mean, look, we're part of the problem on this podcast we're on here. But we still. Our movie, I feel like, is tight. Joke, joke, joke. Like that's what we like.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, I've actually. I'm sure someone else has an expression for this, but I've Started calling it spacing, which is streamer pacing.
Mark
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Because you start watching shows on any streaming service and you're like, who decided to make this 28 minutes longer than it needed to be?
Nick
Yes.
Thomas Lennon
The answer is because they want to have 10 of them. Yeah, but, like, this would have been covered. You're seeing stuff on streaming shows that would have been covered in a movie, as you said, in about 90 minutes.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. But if it's a streaming show, wouldn't it be great if there was eight to ten of these?
Nick
Yes.
Thomas Lennon
So let's just linger, and then we're gonna. We're gonna linger over here, and then we'll linger back there.
Nick
There you go.
Thomas Lennon
Everything lingers.
Nick
You're right. They make it a twist.
Mark
I ran into Nate Borgasse last night, the seller who told me he's coming back on the podcast.
Nick
Oh, really?
Mark
But. But I go, I'll make sure Mark doesn't fart on you next time.
Thomas Lennon
I really stink you.
Nick
Sorry, that was bad.
Mark
I'll make sure Marsh doesn't fart on you. And it goes.
Thomas Lennon
Thanks. It's like 100 degrees outside.
Mark
Oh, my God.
Nick
Dude, that's burrito from a bodega.
Thomas Lennon
I also feel like it got into my Joel McHale wine.
Nick
Sorry, Joel. Hold on.
Mark
Let me. Let me make sure. Hold on one sec.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, it.
Nick
Oh, it's your.
Mark
What the.
Thomas Lennon
Dude, I would like. I just want to make sure you don't need to see a doctor, because that was. That was legitimately like, covering up a fart.
Nick
Spray. Don't spray.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
That's horrific.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. Has a doctor said that you're okay?
Nick
No.
Mark
This guy worked with Matthew Perry in. He's worried about you.
Nick
I'll be there for you.
Thomas Lennon
I think you should probably. You should probably see a doctor pretty soon.
Mark
Oh, my God.
Nick
A priest and a seance in here. Some sage. Holy hell akbar.
Mark
That is a really.
Thomas Lennon
Danny Thomas's real name.
Nick
Three times backwards.
Thomas Lennon
He has to appear.
Nick
Yeah. Holy shit.
Producer
I'll eat a poop sandwich there.
Mark
That is brutal.
Thomas Lennon
I think.
Nick
I think it's passed. Jesus Christ.
Thomas Lennon
It's not all the way gone.
Mark
I mean, usually your cartoon farts don't smell.
Nick
No, that was a bad one. That was a burrito I had from a store. A bodega?
Thomas Lennon
Yeah. Yeah.
Nick
Down the street.
Thomas Lennon
Was it made out of cat food? What?
Nick
Oh, man.
Thomas Lennon
Do they have a letter grade in the window? And the answer is. We know that the answer is no.
Mark
Yes, that is. That candle ain't gonna help.
Thomas Lennon
I'm just trying to smell the wine. Now, to get away from that,
Mark
someone was. Told me they do coffee grounds on a plane in case they're next to someone stinky.
Thomas Lennon
You ever watch the flight attendant will walk down with an open bag of coffee grounds.
Mark
Smart.
Thomas Lennon
And kind of like, squeeze it. Give it a little, like.
Nick
Yeah. Activate it.
Thomas Lennon
It'll kill a lot of.
Nick
I had a fat lady on a flight. She had the worst.
Thomas Lennon
That was her only character.
Nick
Well, it was more. I held out. I held back. Okay. She was a fat, heavyset woman of color. Wow. And she had, like, a tight body. So she had the worst fat and heavy set. Yes. Wow.
Mark
Mark this and Morrissey in the same episode. We're making a lot of enemies.
Thomas Lennon
You literally ripping farts. Yeah. She was a podcast called Ripping Farts and Starting. And Starting Feuds. Holy.
Nick
That's a good title. Farts and Feuds.
Thomas Lennon
Farts and Feuds. Welcome back.
Mark
We pitched that to Quibi, too. They wouldn't bite.
Thomas Lennon
You're gonna end up with a shotgun in your mouth outside the stadium in Auburn Hills listening to Daughter by Pearl Jam.
Mark
Quibi was. I mean, that was a crazy.
Thomas Lennon
I almost had two Quibi shows.
Nick
Really? Almost Swip bragging. Yeah.
Mark
Quibby and Ciso.
Nick
Where was that, too?
Mark
Ciso.
Thomas Lennon
I had to produce the show for Ciso. Really?
Nick
Oh, wow.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
Anything else?
Thomas Lennon
That's when we ran out of names, remember?
Nick
Yes, yes.
Thomas Lennon
We just took anything from Danny K and we put it.
Nick
Vimeo as well. Remember Vimeo?
Thomas Lennon
Vimeo's still around.
Mark
Vimeo is good.
Nick
Now, this to be.
Thomas Lennon
Vimeo is where you, like. If you make a video. That's too.
Mark
We lost him. We lost him.
Nick
All right, all right.
Mark
We lost him on the mic.
Nick
This is the second time Lennon's been shot.
Mark
Oh, my God.
Nick
Oh. All right. That's it. That's it. The chamber's empty. I had to get the last one out. It was. It was bubbling, bubbling crude. Holy hell. Sorry, Tommy. Good to have you back.
Thomas Lennon
It's good to be here.
Nick
This is your Reno911.
Mark
Is there any pressure to bring that show back? Do people hit you up all the time?
Nick
Oh, that was a classic.
Thomas Lennon
I mean, we have done a fair. Like, we. We reboot it here and there, and, you know, it. It's sort of an evergreen thing. It's not super complicated, you know?
Mark
Yeah, yeah, we.
Thomas Lennon
One nice thing. People think that, like, it's weird.
Mark
It has.
Thomas Lennon
It's having a moment now because people are like, it's so incorrect. You know, it doesn't give a. That's.
Nick
Well, I guess you said The N word.
Thomas Lennon
Actually, by a lot of standards, it would be. Yeah, but to us, it was always just like, oh, this is just funny. We are. We're not. Not. We're not. We're never gross for to be gross. And we're never.
Mark
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
You know, but we also never filter. The show is very. Not filtered.
Nick
You know, same with us. So, yeah, obviously, I had a crush on the blonde Wendy. Wendy.
Thomas Lennon
Why wouldn't.
Mark
She's great. She's awesome.
Thomas Lennon
And a ditch.
Mark
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
I don't think she'd mind me saying she's a dish. Yeah. Wendy's. Yeah, she's a.
Nick
Is that her?
Thomas Lennon
No, that's Carrie. Also a dish. My dear friend. Yes. The state was. Nobody wanted us to do anything. No one gave a. We would do live shows and things like that. And MTV was doing a show called you Wrote it, you watch it. David was an intern at MTV on some other news and stuff, and he'd heard about the show, and he said. We pitched. We said, hey, can we make some videos for this show? And they were like, no. And we're like, oh, okay. And then we did the thing that ended up changing our lives in show business. And it's still, I think, what you were just talking about. Instead of pitching it, we went and shot three sketches.
Nick
That's the way to do it.
Thomas Lennon
And we gave. We walked in and gave them to them, and it was like, look at this.
Nick
And wow.
Thomas Lennon
That. From that. We got. You watch it. From your. You watch it. We got the State. Jon Stewart was the host of that. So Jon got the Jon Stewart Show. We got the State. And then from the State, you know, viva variety and Reno 911.
Nick
Wow.
Thomas Lennon
Probably, I don't know, 30 movies of some combination of these people have made. I mean, most of these people are in Gail Daughtry, the movie.
Nick
Oh, it's great. You guys are still buds.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Producer
Anyone in here sort of not doing what they want to do today?
Thomas Lennon
Every single person in the group pretty much does what they. Todd does art. He does, like, art installations. And Todd is the founder and the pilot in the front there. Todd lives in Seoul and does, like, art installations and stuff.
Nick
Interesting. Yeah. What the hell?
Thomas Lennon
Everybody, pretty much everyone else, almost everyone in that picture directs movies.
Nick
Cool.
Mark
I thought that was young Todd Barry in that flannel for a second.
Thomas Lennon
Oh, that's David Wayne Showalter is one of Hollywood's biggest directors. Ken obviously directs and is in everything. I'm in a lot of stuff. That is Kevin Allison. He has a very popular podcast called Risk Scary stories. Have you done risk?
Nick
Many years ago.
Thomas Lennon
Did you fart on him?
Nick
He didn't have one loaded, but what the hell. The guy.
Thomas Lennon
That's a bummer because he pro. He might be into it.
Nick
That's true.
Thomas Lennon
He's probably of the state your best audience for that.
Nick
Oh, okay. Good to know. Well, I took a risk. This guy in the brown jacket.
Thomas Lennon
Joe Triglio.
Nick
Joe. He does.
Thomas Lennon
I'm often mistaken for Joe.
Nick
What is the scene where he's on drugs?
Thomas Lennon
Super Troopers.
Nick
I could pinpoint it.
Mark
Super Troopers.
Nick
So good.
Thomas Lennon
Still not super bad.
Nick
Super Troopers.
Mark
I think it's in both.
Thomas Lennon
Is Joe in us?
Mark
He might be in both.
Thomas Lennon
Joe's. I know in super bad.
Producer
What's his last name?
Thomas Lennon
Joe Lotruglio with a lo and then capital T again.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
He is the member of the state that I'm most often mistaken for. No, otherwise I'm mistaken for a member of the Kids in the hall quite a bit.
Nick
Oh, Bruce or Dave.
Thomas Lennon
I think I'm more.
Producer
I don't know.
Mark
Dave. Oh, he's not.
Thomas Lennon
Who's the guy in Super Troopers you're thinking of?
Nick
That's who I was thinking of though. You nailed it.
Thomas Lennon
Really. But he's in. Joe's in, I mean, a million movies.
Nick
Christina Hendrix, ex husband.
Thomas Lennon
That's not. Joe's not. Joe's never married. Yeah, Joe was never married to Christina Hendricks.
Nick
That guy was married to her.
Mark
We've been through this on the pod before. We've literally done this before.
Nick
Well, we drink a lot of it.
Thomas Lennon
I'm in a terrific movie with Christina Hendricks. You can watch it. It's called Pottersville.
Nick
Whoa.
Thomas Lennon
At one point it was at an actual zero on rotten tomatoes. I think now it's at 16. Can we go to rotten tomatoes? Pottersville.
Nick
Wow.
Mark
Zero. Crazy.
Nick
That's.
Thomas Lennon
Zero is almost impossible because you have to have enough reviews, right. To. To eat, to register. 14%.
Producer
Yeah, right.
Mark
Yeah. But look at that popcorn meter.
Thomas Lennon
That is. It only is good by comparison to. But again, another thing about life. Look at my. The biggest hit I've ever been affiliated with. It's just both ends. You're just. Look at Night of the Museum.
Mark
It's like having a baby on the podcast.
Thomas Lennon
The biggest hit of my entire life that I've ever been a part of on Rotten Tomatoes is probably what, 40 something?
Nick
Maybe.
Mark
Whoa.
Producer
That's crazy.
Nick
Whoa.
Thomas Lennon
Welcome to my fucking life.
Nick
So you never know.
Mark
Yeah, but it's got. Look at the popcorn meter.
Thomas Lennon
It's still not that good. That's an F. That's a yeah, see, that's a terrible review.
Mark
But is that crazy when you write that? Are you like, this is going to be so well received or what?
Thomas Lennon
I've stopped thinking that a long, long time ago. Wow.
Nick
You wrote.
Thomas Lennon
And even worrying about it because.
Nick
Impressive. Impressive.
Thomas Lennon
You know, comedy generally doesn't get reviewed that well.
Nick
You got that right.
Thomas Lennon
You know, but I mean, it's about to have its fourth or fifth film. Wow. So it's like, you know, you gotta. Oh, thank you. Did you just rate it nicely? Thank you.
Nick
Good man sake. He's not a member. Did you get to direct that as well?
Thomas Lennon
No, no. God no. That's Shawn Levy. Probably the biggest director in Hollywood currently.
Nick
Wait, what is Levy done?
Thomas Lennon
He just did one called Wolverine. Deadpool versus Wolverine.
Mark
Pretty big.
Nick
Very bad. Geez. I heard of. You heard of this guy?
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, Sean Levy. Huge deal.
Nick
I don't know Levy. All right.
Thomas Lennon
You'd like him. He's a good guy.
Nick
Okay, great.
Thomas Lennon
Don't rip a fart on him when you meet him.
Nick
I won't.
Producer
Quick question. So when my kid goes to night. Museum night at the museum, do I
Thomas Lennon
get a little kickback from that? I do.
Producer
Do you get kickbacks from this outfit?
Thomas Lennon
I get a very small kickback from that outfit. It's not as good as you would think. Yeah, no, I don't get anything from when they go to the museum. No, from the outfit that is an officially licensed lieutenant. I. I'm gonna tell you right now, I don't do as well as you would like. And. And I'm just gonna. Can I quickly. If we're starting fucking feuds.
Nick
Yeah. Hell yeah.
Thomas Lennon
I'm gonna start a real, real, actual feud.
Nick
Bring it on, Fetty.
Thomas Lennon
I'm gonna give a great big F you to Spirit Halloween.
Nick
Oh, shit.
Thomas Lennon
Now here's what I'm gonna say. If you try to find the Lieutenant Dangle outfit at Spirit Halloween, you're not gonna find it. You know why? Cuz? Look up Sergeant Short Pants at Spirit Halloween. They've made up their own.
Nick
They ripped you off.
Thomas Lennon
They've made up their own Lieutenant Dangle outfit. As if there's just always cops in shorts.
Nick
There we go. Wow.
Mark
Yo, give him a bad review, dude.
Thomas Lennon
No, that. That might be the official.
Nick
Again, this is.
Thomas Lennon
No, no, no. Sergeant Short Bands cop costume. Yeah, so they. They've made up. They've made up their own version of it.
Mark
It's getting some good reviews. Look at that.
Thomas Lennon
It's got great reviews. These fucking asshol. Oh, this the. The knockoff Lieutenant Dangle outfit has Better reviews than night at the museum.
Nick
Welcome.
Thomas Lennon
Welcome to my life.
Nick
Wow. Spirit. You. This is why your airline went under, guys.
Thomas Lennon
This is why you up. Your airline. Oh, no, you can give it a good review. It's all right. You know what? A rising tide lifts all ships.
Nick
Say you ripped the guy off.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Mark
And if you listen to the podcast, go to Spirit Halloween and destroy it.
Thomas Lennon
No, no, no, no, no. A rising tide lifts all ships. But you can also get the official one. Some fucking place.
Mark
All right.
Thomas Lennon
Don't destroy Amazon.
Mark
Hold your fire.
Thomas Lennon
Not that this is an ad for Amazon, but I think they have the real.
Mark
They need a boost.
Thomas Lennon
You're wearing the real one over there. That's the real one over there. It looks good.
Nick
Hell, yeah. I was wondering. I always wonder how guys like you stay rich. And then it's stuff like this. These little nickel and dime things. There's streams of revenue coming in.
Thomas Lennon
Did you see? I wonder how guys like you stay rich.
Nick
Well, you've been in the game for six decades. Yeah. So you always wonder, is it Peter? Does it fizzle?
Mark
I'm glad the fart wasn't the most insulting thing you've done.
Nick
You know what I'm saying?
Thomas Lennon
No, no. But here's what you. The real secret of that is take every time you get paid, take 10 of it and put it in the stock market. Yeah.
Nick
Oh, is that right?
Thomas Lennon
Someone's telling you that right now?
Nick
No.
Thomas Lennon
Oh, you need a time machine where I tell you that like 20 years ago.
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Just do that forever.
Mark
Now that.
Thomas Lennon
Dude.
Mark
Fanduel. Go, Nick.
Nick
Or.
Thomas Lennon
Or Fanduel. Yeah, Lance. All right.
Nick
Well. Yeah.
Mark
Well, dude, it's been awesome having you. This has been a great episode.
Thomas Lennon
You want to go spend some real money in the garment district?
Nick
Yes. Let's do it. Let's make our own show.
Mark
And remember, pull up the movie one more time.
Thomas Lennon
Gilded Daughter. It's a great picture. G A I L. Where can people see? Oh, there's a trailer. It comes out July 10th. Everywhere in the world. It's in real movie theaters.
Mark
Wow.
Nick
Hell, yeah.
Thomas Lennon
Real movie theaters. July 10th. If you like, anything with the state. Camerino, David Wayne.
Nick
Love it.
Thomas Lennon
These are the people behind Wet Hot American Summer, obviously. Wanderlust, wanderlust and the 10 and, you
Nick
know, all the good.
Thomas Lennon
It's a great premise of a picture. It's a premise so funny. I was like, are they. Is this gonna get made? And then they. They made it it.
Nick
And that funny was so funny that you're worried it sometimes it's so funny.
Thomas Lennon
You worry Is it really going to get made?
Nick
Yeah.
Thomas Lennon
But this one did get made. Oh, it's at a 74. Holy.
Nick
Hey, it's quite an upgrade from Night of the Mew.
Thomas Lennon
Yeah, almost.
Nick
It's almost double true.
Thomas Lennon
Almost double the Night at the Museum.
Nick
Long titles. Sometimes it was actually.
Thomas Lennon
I think it was longer.
Nick
Really?
Thomas Lennon
Yeah.
Nick
You know, it's like, whatever, Jackie. And what are we looking at, Johnny Make?
Thomas Lennon
We're looking at your tour dates. We're plugging dates.
Nick
Plugging dates, baby.
Thomas Lennon
We got June 7th. Let's see. Where is the closest you are to anywhere I live? All right.
Nick
I'm going to Milwaukee.
Thomas Lennon
You mean Milwaukee?
Nick
Yeah. If you want to do a June
Thomas Lennon
6th at the Improv, I will be very. I don't get to Milwaukee till, like, the couple days after that.
Nick
Okay. That's what they all say.
Thomas Lennon
Walk is a beautiful town. Hiding in love.
Mark
Milwaukee.
Thomas Lennon
Hiding in plain sight.
Mark
It's awesome.
Thomas Lennon
Somebody was very smart and they were looking for a cool place to live. There wasn't, like, already crowded in a bummer.
Nick
The cold, though.
Mark
But it's a great city.
Nick
It's a great city.
Mark
Underrated.
Nick
I'm going to June. I'm excited.
Thomas Lennon
That's why Prince stayed in Minneapolis.
Nick
That's right.
Thomas Lennon
Keeps away some of the kooks.
Nick
There you go.
Thomas Lennon
Who's playing Budapest?
Mark
Me.
Thomas Lennon
That's gonna be.
Mark
And by the way, tickets still available in Budapest. That one is looking rough.
Thomas Lennon
Not that many.
Mark
No, no. Everything else is moving.
Thomas Lennon
What's available?
Mark
Hey, what's the best seat I can get in Budapest? Lisbon's doing great. Athens, doing great. Adding a show in Warsaw.
Thomas Lennon
Where are you gonna be in Athens?
Mark
I don't know.
Thomas Lennon
It's the hottest city in the world. And I don't mean that in the best way.
Producer
Best seats you can get.
Nick
All right.
Thomas Lennon
That's the best seat I can get right there.
Producer
Yeah, It's.
Thomas Lennon
How much?
Nick
28 Gerkies.
Thomas Lennon
28 Gerkies.
Nick
That's a lot of people.
Thomas Lennon
Actual pickles, man.
Mark
Two Cornish owns.
Thomas Lennon
I knew their economy was up. I didn't know it was like.
Nick
Like pickle. Yeah, that was a pickle.
Thomas Lennon
It's a pickle economy.
Mark
Yeah. We got. What do I have?
Thomas Lennon
You know, Zagreb. You're gonna kill it.
Mark
Oh, Zagreb, dude. We're doing well in Zagreb. Budapest, not looking great. Vienna, Warsaw.
Thomas Lennon
Have fun.
Mark
You have fun adding a second show. Helsinki, Stockholm and Copenhagen. Gonna be a lot of fun.
Nick
Hell, yeah.
Thomas Lennon
I just learned that that's how you fucking spell Copenhagen. And it blew my mind.
Nick
There you go.
Thomas Lennon
I didn't even Know that looked like a word.
Mark
It's a great city.
Nick
Great beautiful town.
Producer
Mark, where are you gonna be?
Nick
I'll be at the Irvine Improv. Come on out. That's a big room we got. We got one show left to sell out. Then we got the Tempe Improv.
Thomas Lennon
Picture of me backstage of the Irvine Improv not to bring.
Mark
I think there is.
Thomas Lennon
Tell you why it's there. I think it got moved from. From the Hollywood one. And they're just like, ah, move here. You can go.
Mark
Yeah, Irvine's a good one.
Thomas Lennon
I got moved down to Irvine.
Nick
Great, great club though. Mark Ridley is in Detroit area. Royal Oak, Cleveland Hilarities and Seattle. Emerald City side. Spurs in Tampa and the clubhouse in the Hamptons.
Thomas Lennon
Going out to that cobs you got a couple nights.
Nick
Cobs is.
Thomas Lennon
Here's the thing about Cobbs. You don't even need to be good to play Cobbs. Cobbs is such a friendly place.
Nick
Great crowds.
Thomas Lennon
You could just try.
Nick
I'll fart up there.
Thomas Lennon
You could just try stuff out. Yeah, you can really try stuff out. And because San Francisco and Cobbs in
Nick
particular, the best places in the world, Nashville and Pittsburgh.
Mark
And you have to cancel some of these if we shoot that movie.
Nick
But you better believe it.
Mark
It looks like we're shooting it, so that's what I hear. Fingers crossed.
Nick
All right. I'll believe it when I see it.
Mark
Awesome to hang out with you, Thomas.
Thomas Lennon
Pleasure.
Nick
This is a treat and an honor.
Mark
Cheers.
Nick
Hey, slam chamorcy Sunday's the day for
Thomas Lennon
my next bender A bit of fever wreck, you know the fear juice. Close. I've had a little too much burping and Norman's talking shit about the Pope and I get down in the same way up on the roof like a cops coming and naked Samuel is feeling dangerous I'm out to lunch here in New Orleans this woman doesn't look like I remember her and I get down in the same way we might be true.
Date: June 1, 2026
Guest: Thomas Lennon
This lively and sprawling episode welcomes actor, comedian, and writer Thomas Lennon (The State, Reno 911!) for a hilarious deep-dive into his varied career, the inner workings of the comedy world, stories from comedy and showbiz, and plenty of off-the-cuff banter. Hosts Sam Morril and Mark Normand steer the conversation through Thomas’s work on musicals, 90s sketch comedy, sitcoms, the enduring power of Eddie Murphy, Broadway musicals, strange Hollywood rumors, sports nostalgia, writing for TV and film, and the challenges and quirks of building a career in entertainment. The usual mix of drinks, digressions, and NYC comic energy makes for a fast-paced ride peppered with memorable stories, genuine behind-the-curtain insights, and lots of laughs.
Trading Places: The Musical ([00:09], [20:46], [22:25])
Comedy Resume & Career Varieties ([00:17], [56:01], [56:54])
Eddie Murphy Stories ([00:43], [02:29], [03:24])
Callbacks and In-jokes in Movies ([05:15])
Musicals & Theater Geekery ([15:10], [35:34], [35:40])
Origins of The State ([10:14])
Legacy of 90s Sketch Comedy ([12:09])
Not Quite SNL ([13:22])
Bill Cosby/Bob Newhart Impressions ([07:34], [08:15])
Playing ‘Gay’ Characters ([14:08])
Comic-Con Memories (as Dangle from Reno 911!) ([16:48])
Hollywood Urban Legends ([29:01])
The Economics and Evolution of Fame ([20:46])
Living in Wisconsin/Lake Geneva ([37:30])
Parenthood & Family Life ([61:40])
Navigating New Media & Industry Changes ([55:53], [66:10])
Writing and Career Longevity ([60:44], [63:14])
Self-Deprecation & Rotten Tomatoes Woes ([76:35], [77:10])
On Meeting Eddie Murphy:
“I said, like, the way you would meet royalty, and Eddie went like, correct...That’s the perfect thing to say.” — Thomas ([06:28])
On SNL & Comedy Group Ethos:
“We didn’t want to be SNL that era, for sure. We wanted to not be that. Instead of doing...something that felt like it was covered before, we just wouldn’t do it. So...a lot of the stuff is pretty absurd.” — Thomas ([11:37])
On Historic Sketch Comedy:
“We viewed ourselves as like a sort of a punk band or something.” — Thomas ([11:10])
Classic Self-Deprecation:
“If you’re hitting 95% failure, you’re killing it.” — Thomas ([59:51])
On Navigating Hollywood Now:
“You can go pitch a high-level studio executive and you will never hear about it again. It’s fucking rude.” — Thomas ([64:14])
On Making it in Comedy:
“In comedy, we do more in a year than most people do in 20 years probably.” — Nick ([60:52])
On Bootleg Merch:
“...the knockoff Lieutenant Dangle outfit has better reviews than Night at the Museum. Welcome to my life.” — Thomas ([79:48])
This episode is a feast for fans of comedy history, behind-the-scenes showbiz stories, and classic banter between comedians who know how to work a room (or podcast). Whether you’re here for Reno 911! nostalgia, stories of 90s sketch comedy, Broadway insider knowledge, or just a bit of absurd, adult fun—there’s something here for everyone.
Upcoming:
Memorable Last Word:
“Take every time you get paid, take 10 of it and put it in the stock market... Just do that forever.” — Thomas Lennon ([80:51])