We Talk Back: Episode Summary - "Clitical Thinking"

Release Date: June 5, 2025
Hosts: TamBam and AJ Holiday
Podcast: We Talk Back by The Black Effect and iHeartPodcasts

Introduction to Clinical Thinking

In this episode titled "Clitical Thinking," hosts TamBam and AJ Holiday delve into the nuanced concept of clinical thinking, distinguishing it from traditional critical thinking. They explore how clinical thinking integrates intuition, emotional intelligence, wisdom, and lived experiences, serving as a powerful tool for navigating relationships and personal decisions.

AJ Holiday [23:11]:
"So, it's like logic with a libido, basically, and boundaries."

Defining Clinical vs. Critical Thinking

The hosts begin by unpacking the differences between clinical and critical thinking. While critical thinking is often associated with logical, objective, and analytical processes—traits traditionally coded as masculine—clinical thinking is portrayed as more intuitive and emotionally intelligent, qualities frequently attributed to feminine perspectives.

AJ Holiday [50:30]:
"Traditional critical thinking is like spreadsheets and data analytics... Clinical thinking is intuitive, emotionally intelligent."

TamBam [27:31]:
"Sometimes that clinical thinking can have you thinking wrong too."

AJ counters, emphasizing that clinical thinking is grounded in a deep-seated intuition that, more often than not, is reliable.

AJ Holiday [27:45]:
"It's something in my spirit that says, this ain't right. And that's enough. That's all I really need."

Relationship Dynamics and Masculinity

A significant portion of the discussion centers on relationship dynamics, particularly the expectations placed on men and how these intersect with clinical thinking. The hosts critique the notion of men claiming to be "simple," uncovering the complexities behind such statements.

AJ Holiday [34:03]:
"I feel like you got to bring both. I feel like men should be soft sometimes, too. Masculinity is not just because this... That's not masculinity. Masculinity is more assertive, is more calculated."

TamBam [31:12]:
"I don't think these are stupid. I just think... When I say I'm harder than you, I don't know. I just don't be going for it."

They discuss how men often mask their emotional needs and the societal pressure to appear strong and unbothered, which can hinder authentic communication and intimacy in relationships.

Personal Anecdotes and Family Dynamics

TamBam shares a personal story about being asked to serve food at her cousin’s wedding, highlighting the complexities of family expectations and personal boundaries.

TamBam [60:09]:
"Families do that, though. Families."

AJ Holiday [60:15]:
"I never call my first cousin and ask her to serve food at my wedding. That's degrading."

This anecdote underscores the importance of setting boundaries and how clinical thinking empowers individuals to honor their feelings and maintain healthy relationships.

Navigating Emotional Intelligence and Boundaries

The conversation progresses to the importance of emotional intelligence and boundary-setting in personal relationships. The hosts emphasize that clinical thinking aids in recognizing and acting upon one's gut feelings, preventing unhealthy attachments and fostering self-respect.

AJ Holiday [44:03]:
"So like, it's logic with a libido, basically, and boundaries."

TamBam [35:04]:
"I feel like we haven't been allowed to be our greatest feminine selves as black women... responsible for everybody, even the men."

They advocate for women embracing their intuition and emotional intelligence to navigate complex social and romantic landscapes effectively.

Practical Applications of Clinical Thinking

The hosts provide practical examples of how clinical thinking can be applied in everyday situations, such as handling unsolicited calls from ex-partners or recognizing red flags in new relationships.

AJ Holiday [52:55]:
"What you want? So, y' all bitches thinking y' all could change people at this big age. People do change. I don't agree."

TamBam [53:03]:
"I don't want to say fractions. Like, you don't like how you chew... You can get past that, right?"

They stress the importance of addressing issues as they arise rather than stacking grievances, which can lead to resentment and strained relationships.

Empowering Women Through Clinical Thinking

Towards the end of the episode, TamBam and AJ Holiday empower their listeners to trust their clinical thinking, encouraging them to speak up and set clear boundaries in all aspects of their lives.

AJ Holiday [65:05]:
"So, you know, critical thinking doesn't mean ignoring logic at all, right? So it just adds, like, an extra layer of protection."

TamBam [68:02]:
"Remember, speak now and never hold your peace, okay? Never, never hold your gut feelings, your clit notes."

They conclude by inviting listeners to share their stories, particularly instances where men have claimed to be simple but failed to meet those claims in action, fostering a community of shared experiences and mutual support.

Notable Quotes

• AJ Holiday [23:11]:
  "So it's like logic with a libido, basically, and boundaries."

• AJ Holiday [34:03]:
  "I feel like you got to bring both. I feel like men should be soft sometimes, too. Masculinity is not just because this... That's not masculinity. Masculinity is more assertive, is more calculated."

• TamBam [35:04]:
  "I feel like we haven't been allowed to be our greatest feminine selves as black women... responsible for everybody, even the men."

• AJ Holiday [65:05]:
  "So, you know, critical thinking doesn't mean ignoring logic at all, right? So it just adds, like, an extra layer of protection."

• TamBam [68:02]:
  "Remember, speak now and never hold your peace, okay? Never, never hold your gut feelings, your clit notes."

Conclusion

In "Clitical Thinking," TamBam and AJ Holiday offer a compelling discussion on the intersection of intuition, emotional intelligence, and logical reasoning in personal and relational contexts. They advocate for women, especially black women, to harness their innate clinical thinking to navigate the complexities of relationships, set healthy boundaries, and empower themselves in a world that often undervalues their emotional and intuitive strengths.

Listeners are encouraged to reflect on their own experiences, trust their gut feelings, and engage in open conversations about the dynamics of masculinity and emotional intelligence in their lives.

For more episodes, follow We Talk Back on the Black Effect and iHeartPodcasts platforms.