Podcast Summary: "I Almost Dated My Stalker"

Podcast Information:

• Title: We're All Insane
• Host/Author: Devorah Roloff
• Description: A podcast where real people share raw, unfiltered stories about their lives, challenges, and traumas that have shaped them. Each episode offers a deep dive into the unique journey of the guest—No scripts. No interruptions. Just authentic storytelling that unfolds naturally, in the guest's own words.
• Episode: I Almost Dated My Stalker
• Release Date: June 30, 2025

Introduction

In the gripping episode titled "I Almost Dated My Stalker," host Devorah Roloff sits down with Cassandra, a realtor from Hobbs, New Mexico, who bravely shares her harrowing experience of being stalked for four years. Cassandra's story delves deep into the psychological and emotional turmoil she endured, shedding light on the often-overlooked challenges faced by professionals who are targets of persistent harassment.

Background: Transition to Real Estate

Cassandra recounts her move back to Hobbs in March 2020 due to her mother's battle with cancer. Initially a restaurant manager, the COVID-19 pandemic thwarted her plans to find alternative employment, leading her to pursue a career in real estate. Obtaining her license in October 2020, Cassandra quickly immersed herself in the field, leveraging online platforms to attract clients.

Cassandra [00:43]: "I was putting myself out there, posting online, showing myself, trying to bring in business."

The Stalking Begins: Initial Contact

In February 2021, Cassandra began receiving anonymous text messages centered around real estate inquiries. However, these messages soon took a disturbing turn when the sender expressed a personal and inappropriate interest in her.

Cassandra [02:38]: "I got text messages from a person who I didn't know... after seeing my Facebook post, they found me attractive and they asked if I would have sex with them."

Believing it to be a prank, Cassandra initially ignored these messages. A subsequent message from someone named Robert escalated the situation as he shared personal tragedies, leading Cassandra to suspect malicious intent.

Cassandra [03:28]: "He told me, 'I want to marry you and have your babies.' That was when everything came down on me."

Escalation: Harassment Intensifies

The harassment continued with no caller ID phone calls where the caller was heard masturbating, creating a terrifying environment for Cassandra. Despite making police reports, the anonymity of the caller made it difficult for law enforcement to take effective action.

Cassandra [05:38]: "The police said they couldn't do anything because the numbers were anonymous. So, I just had to endure."

Cassandra's professional life was significantly impacted as she became hesitant to work alone or interact freely with clients, fearing further intrusion.

Realization: Identifying the Stalker

In December 2024, a breakthrough occurred when Cassandra received a message from a contractor she had never met personally. Suspecting his involvement, she conducted a reverse phone lookup and discovered his identity—a registered sex offender with a violent past, including an attack on a former girlfriend.

Cassandra [46:23]: "When I Googled his last name, an article from 2015 surfaced about a man who attacked his ex-girlfriend. It was him."

This revelation confirmed Cassandra's worst fears: the man she had been interacting with professionally was her stalker.

Cassandra [44:52]: "He has a very violent history against women... and he's still a free man right now."

Community Involvement and Police Interaction

Determined to seek justice, Cassandra went public with her story on Facebook, detailing her experiences and the inaction of the local sheriff's department. Her posts resonated widely, revealing that her stalker's harassment extended to other realtors nationwide.

Cassandra [64:13]: "I put it on Facebook, and people started sharing it. Even the police reached out, but it felt like harassment."

Despite escalating her efforts, the sheriff's department remained ineffective, ultimately resulting in a restraining order filed against Cassandra herself—a move evidently manipulated by the stalker to silence her.

Cassandra [66:28]: "He filed a restraining order against me, claiming I was making death threats to him because of his actions."

Current Status and Ongoing Struggles

As of the latest updates, Cassandra continues to navigate the complexities of her situation. Although initial interactions with law enforcement were fraught with challenges, she eventually connected with a detective who acknowledged the severity of her case. However, procedural delays and conflicting reports have left her in a precarious position.

Cassandra [72:19]: "They are actively working on it right now. I am a little worried because there are conflicting reports on whether he's violating his parole."

Cassandra highlights the broader issue of inadequate resources and support systems for victims of stalking and harassment, especially within professional communities like real estate.

Insights & Conclusions

Cassandra's ordeal underscores the profound impact that stalking and harassment can have on personal and professional lives. Her experience reveals gaps in law enforcement's ability to handle such cases effectively, particularly when perpetrators operate under anonymity.

Cassandra [24:02]: "People see Realtors and think it's just a pretty face selling a home, but you have to be smarter than that."

Beyond the immediate threat to her safety, Cassandra discusses the psychological toll, including increased distrust and emotional strain, which has affected her relationships and self-perception.

Cassandra [26:00]: "I became very distrusting of men in general... My relationships are not the same anymore because it's changed me a lot."

Ultimately, Cassandra advocates for greater awareness and stronger support systems for individuals facing similar challenges. She emphasizes the importance of speaking out and maintaining resilience despite systemic obstacles.

Cassandra [81:43]: "Have the confidence to know that what you're going through is real and know that you shouldn't be going through that and trust your gut."

Notable Quotes

• Cassandra [02:38]: "I got text messages from a person who I didn't know... after seeing my Facebook post, they found me attractive and they asked if I would have sex with them."

• Cassandra [03:28]: "He told me, 'I want to marry you and have your babies.' That was when everything came down on me."

• Cassandra [44:52]: "He has a very violent history against women... and he's still a free man right now."

• Cassandra [24:02]: "People see Realtors and think it's just a pretty face selling a home, but you have to be smarter than that."

• Cassandra [26:00]: "I became very distrusting of men in general... My relationships are not the same anymore because it's changed me a lot."

• Cassandra [81:43]: "Have the confidence to know that what you're going through is real and know that you shouldn't be going through that and trust your gut."

Conclusion

"I Almost Dated My Stalker" is a poignant and eye-opening episode that sheds light on the silent struggles faced by professionals targeted by relentless harassment. Cassandra's story serves as a powerful reminder of the need for robust support systems and proactive measures to protect individuals from such predatory behavior. Through her courage in sharing her story, Cassandra not only seeks justice for herself but also advocates for broader societal changes to ensure safety and support for others in similar situations.