160: Turkey Turkey Turkey & Spying Gary

Summary

Podcast Summary: We're Here to Help Episode 160: Turkey Turkey Turkey & Spying Gary Release Date: April 7, 2025

Hosted by Jake Johnson and Gareth Reynolds from Headgum, "We're Here to Help" is a unique blend of humor and heartfelt advice. In Episode 160, titled "Turkey Turkey Turkey & Spying Gary," Jake and Gareth tackle a variety of listener questions ranging from bowling league troubles to unsettling neighborhood encounters.

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1. Bubbles the Chimpanzee Story [00:00 - 08:50]

Overview: The episode kicks off with Jake and Gareth sharing personal anecdotes about fasting and quickly segues into a fascinating story about Michael Jackson's pet chimpanzee, Bubbles.

Key Points:

• Gareth shares his experience with a 72-hour water fast, discussing the emotional and physical challenges he faced.
• The conversation transitions to discussing Bubbles, Michael Jackson's chimpanzee, highlighting Bubbles' life post-Jackson, including his time in a sanctuary in Florida where he pursues painting.
• The hosts humorously explore the quirks of keeping a chimpanzee as a pet and the inevitable challenges that come with it.

Notable Quotes:

• Gareth Reynolds [01:09]: "From hour 65 to 72, I was doing some weird stuff, my man."
• Hannah [07:07]: "He's a painter in an animal sanctuary in Florida and hangs out with one chimpanzee friend and they don't socialize with the other chimps."
• Gareth Reynolds [08:01]: "It's not an aquarium. Stop looking."

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2. Advice for Hannah's Bowling Dilemma [13:26 - 37:00]

Overview: Hannah calls in seeking guidance on how to remove problematic relatives from her bowling league without causing family drama.

Key Points:

• Issue: Hannah and her husband joined a bowling league to make friends in their new small town. Initially, they bowled with a lovely older couple, but this season, the new partners have been excessively drunk, causing disruptions like forfeiting games, starting fights, and making inappropriate behavior (e.g., making out on benches).
• Challenge: Hannah wants to find a way to discontinue bowling with these relatives in the upcoming season without sparking family conflicts.
• Advice Provided:
  • Diplomatic Approach: Emphasize a desire to become more competitive and perhaps join a team with higher-performing bowlers. For instance, claiming they were approached by a more skilled couple who can help them excel.
  • Setting Boundaries: Suggesting Hannah and her husband adopt behaviors that subtly discourage the disruptive bowlers, such as limiting alcohol consumption or creating passive-aggressive scenarios to signal a shift in group dynamics.
  • Alternative Solutions: Including the idea of having the problematic bowlers serve as alternates or finding new partners who align better with their competitive goals.

Notable Quotes:

• Hannah [15:31]: "We want to find a way to like, either make them not want to bowl with us next season or just like kick them out or replace them without causing, like, a stir in the family."
• Gareth Reynolds [23:27]: "I think there's another thing you say, hey, we love bowling with you guys... we're looking to level up."
• Hannah [25:29]: "And by the way, my husband Andy pooped his pants tonight. It's called a turkey, and that's a flex."

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3. Advice for Sarah's "Spying Gary" Issue [38:32 - 58:36]

Overview: Sarah from Auckland, New Zealand, reaches out about an unsettling daily occurrence where a man repeatedly looks into her bedroom window every morning.

Key Points:

• Issue: Sarah notices a man jogging past her window every morning around 7:30 AM. They often lock eyes, which has left her feeling uncomfortable and anxious. She also encounters him occasionally at the dog park but hasn't interacted with him directly.
• Concerns: Sarah is puzzled by his persistent glances and is unsure why he continues this behavior despite apparent boundaries.
• Advice Provided:
  • Install Warning Signs: Suggesting Sarah place clear and assertive signs on her window, such as "Stop Looking" or "Not an Aquarium. Please Do Not Stare," to deter prying eyes.
  • Aggressive Deterrents: Initially, some humorous suggestions like using an air horn whenever he looks in were discussed, though practical concerns about neighbor reactions were raised.
  • Maintain Boundaries: Emphasize the importance of setting firm boundaries without escalating the situation, ensuring Sarah feels safe without creating unnecessary tension.

Notable Quotes:

• Sarah [38:57]: "Every morning I sit in my bed and eat my breakfast... there's a man that runs past with his dog... I just don't know why he's looking in."
• Gareth Reynolds [43:03]: "Here’s my first pitch: a sign that says, 'Stop looking,' and an air horn to blast when he does."
• Hannah [51:36]: "Keep running. Stop looking is perfect."

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4. Conclusion

In Episode 160, Jake and Gareth blend their characteristic humor with genuine attempts to provide helpful advice. From navigating tricky social dynamics in a bowling league to addressing personal safety concerns, the hosts engage listeners with relatable scenarios and creative solutions. Their ability to balance lighthearted banter with sincere guidance makes "We're Here to Help" a compelling listen for anyone seeking both laughs and practical advice.

Final Notable Quote:

• Hannah [61:31]: "Mrs. Gingerbread's getting bookings in Reno. And so it's... becoming part of our lives and I think that the world is in need of healing and maybe this is a small band aid."

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Note: This summary focuses solely on the content-driven segments of the episode, omitting advertisements, intros, and outros as per the request.

Transcript

[Jake Johnson]

This is a headgun podcast.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And we are back.

[Hannah]

Yes. Jakey boy.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You know what I got Gareth?

[Hannah]

Huh?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I don't think we've texted about this yet. I did a 72 hour fast.

[Hannah]

Oh, did you?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes.

[Hannah]

How was that?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Great.

[Hannah]

Now, I, I, we might have talked about how we like a fast, but.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

What? That's a lot.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I know.

[Hannah]

Nothing but water.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Nothing but water. 72 hours.

[Hannah]

How was your sleep?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay.

[Hannah]

How was the first 24 nightmare? And then after that start to ease up on you?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Day two, pretty weird.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Day three ended up I was Martin Sheen and Apocalypse now. From hour 65 to 72, I was doing some weird stuff, my man.

[Hannah]

Okay, I still have more questions. What were the biggest benefit you felt?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, the biggest benefit was actually, it's more sad than funny, but I was doing it to try to. I was missing my buddy Jeff.

[Hannah]

Oh, yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And I was like, I was just dying to, like, get drunk or do something. I was like, I don't want to do that. And I was like, I just want to shake something up because I can't stop thinking about him. And then the health stuff, I was like, you know what I might do is just see. And Eric Adelstein obviously is like, brother, it brings out the dog in you.

[Hannah]

It's like, you'll feel like you took mushrooms.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, man. He's like, man, I'm telling you, when you get to hour 60, watch out.

[Hannah]

So did you feel. I mean, that's a very. Yes. It's also, while that is a very, I don't want to say sweet, but it's a. It's such an in your 40s way to party. I just won't eat.

[Gareth Reynolds]

By the way. You're totally.

[Hannah]

It's like the sad version of like, I'm going to drink a bottle of vodka, my friend's gone. You're like, I'm off food for three days.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, you know, in the past, when I've lost people in my life, I've always drank.

[Hannah]

Yeah, no, I know you.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And you just go, like, what's going on? Like, well, I'm really sad. What happened? There were five really weird days.

[Hannah]

Well, it's also, I, I went through that a couple years ago and, and it was great for the night, and then the morning was the worst.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But then you got in that same cycle. You're like, well, now I'm just gonna have one to, like, calm this moment down.

[Hannah]

Yeah, yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And at a certain point of life, you're like, I'm turning into Nick Cage from leaving Las Vegas.

[Hannah]

No, I know. By the way, Legend. What was.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Legendary performance.

[Hannah]

What was the. The best. Have you ever worked with him? No.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No.

[Hannah]

That would be the dream. What was your, what was your first meal back? Did you play it, like, safe? Were you like, so just kind of some sort of like, probiotics?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I did the whole thing. I, I've been into it.

[Hannah]

I really want. I'll do. I'll throw in a day fast every now and then. I really have. You know what I want to do? This is where we're getting weird. I want to do the week.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's seven day.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Why?

[Hannah]

I hear it's very. There are. And again, this is crazy.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Benefits.

[Hannah]

Crazy.

[Gareth Reynolds]

We're just talking.

[Hannah]

Yeah. We're not recommending podcast intro.

[Gareth Reynolds]

We're just talking.

[Hannah]

Yeah, but I, But I thought you.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Were going to say a darkness retreat. I'm not, I'm not doing.

[Hannah]

I would do one of those. Yeah, I would definitely do one of those. But the week is. I can't imagine getting through the week because even on the day. Even on the day fast that I do, you're allowed to have coffee, right?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I did. I did my one sip.

[Hannah]

I was telling people about that. It's just. Have we aired that? We've aired that intro. Yeah. Has anyone. I feel like you got that got buried in, in everything. What, what are you, like, has anyone said anything to you about it?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I don't think anyone in my world listens to this.

[Hannah]

I know, but even online, like, it should be a thing that people are like, what are you talking? The way you, you just. Even just now in earnest. I didn't put one sip. It's wild.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think.

[Hannah]

So you did.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The audience.

[Hannah]

You did A sip a day is.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Just the audience for the show.

[Hannah]

Did you do it?

[Gareth Reynolds]

And they all go, yeah.

[Hannah]

Did you do a sip a day?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And what was that like, that was your only thing that wasn't water, was your one sip a day.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, I, I, I really enjoyed and I will do it again. Seven days seems like what I don't like about it is it could start eating the muscle.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I mean, I don't want to. What do we.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No offense, but you and me are different animals, man.

[Hannah]

Yeah. What, what are you.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You ever seen a chimp without hair?

[Hannah]

Like, you know what I love?

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's me.

[Hannah]

You know what I love? When you watch like, you're a koala with. No, when you, when you watch chimp stuff and you see like, like you got those, like, chimps that look like they climb trees all day. And then there's the one who looks like he got laid off. And I love when. I love when apes go bald.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Me too. It's the best, by the way. Hairless apes, the. But you see certain chimps without. And I saw.

[Hannah]

I mean, on the head, like they fully are just like. I lost it around 16, by the way.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The. Everything about chimps is the funniest, the best. We've talked about Bubbles, Michael's. Michael's chim.

[Hannah]

Yep. And you've. You told me a wild story about your. You were real deep into the story about how much you wanted to tell the bubble story to the people.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, I mean, that's. I mean, just everybody go on a little Google search. But I'll tell you this. Michael Jackson had a. A pet chip named Bubbles. Took it on red carpets, fed it sushi, was on private jets. And then, you know, it happens. The little chimp grows up a little bit. A little less cute, Gets a little aggressive, gets a little bitey. Right. Gets a little teethy.

[Hannah]

Yep.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And all of a sudden, Michael's busy in Japan doing something else. So what do you do with a chimp when it gets wild? Well, you put in a sanctuary, and so Bubbles was in a sanctuary, but he doesn't want to hang around with a bunch of goddamn chimpanzees. He doesn't want. He doesn't want to eat raw veggies.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Homies had the best food in the whole world. He was on red carpets. He's a star.

[Hannah]

Sushi on a private jet.

[Gareth Reynolds]

There's photos of this little maniac in the back of a limousine drinking champagne. Mike Jackson.

[Hannah]

Not.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, now you're giving him a bucket of carrots. Your carrots, man. Who he's gonna hang with? I used to hang out with Elizabeth Taylor. Mike Jackson. Now who am I hanging out with? Literal chimpanzees.

[Hannah]

He was, like, signing to the zookeeper, like, get Michael Douglas on the phone now.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Get my agent.

[Hannah]

I want to talk to my agent.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, you guys have made a huge mistake. You put me with a bunch of animals so he wouldn't socialize.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

There were reports he was very depressed, nobody was visiting him. And then he's still. Currently. He found a companion, a friend.

[Hannah]

He still is alive.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes. And you want to know what he does? He's down in Florida. You know what he does with his days? Hangs out with his companion and paints.

[Hannah]

It's pretty good.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's a true story. It's crazy, but he's a painter. He's a painter. Listen to these words I'm saying, Karen. He's Michael Jackson's chimp. Is a painter in an animal sanctuary in Florida and hangs out with one chimpanzee friend and they don't socialize with the other chimps.

[Hannah]

Realize it is best case scenario for where things were and.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Or worst case scenario. Cuz guess who else are painters? People in San Quentin jail.

[Hannah]

All right, well, it took a turn there. Listen, everybody, we appreciate he's at Sanctuary, AKA he's in jail, but he's got.

[Gareth Reynolds]

A buddy, red carpets. He's never done anything wrong. Yeah, everybody has a buddy. They're called cellies.

[Hannah]

The paintings are just of like Stars of the Air. Just like him with Mel Gibson.

[Gareth Reynolds]

George Michael.

[Hannah]

With George Michael. Just him drinking champagne. You know, the worst party probably thinks Michael's still alive. All right, anyone that got. That got weird. So we, we appreciate everyone telling everyone about the show and go have a. A Google of bubbles and let me tell you, Jake really wanted to tell this story. We'll just leave it there.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What's that?

[Hannah]

You really wanted to.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Hannah]

You wanted to make this movie at one point.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. Still do.

[Hannah]

Yep. We all want.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And without.

[Hannah]

Further, further.

[Gareth Reynolds]

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is an all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online.

[Hannah]

We love Squarespace. My personal website, GarethReynolds.com is a Squarespace site. So user friendly. We've built multiple websites for the show through Squarespace because we don't have the time or energy to come up with big elaborate lies for people. Squarespace will help us do that. Honestly, there's just so much good that Squarespace offers. There are the services, the offering services that'll help get you paid in one place. From consultations to events to experiences. They have SEO tools. There's Squarespace domains. Like I said, they have just. I mean, we've got four or five domains through Squarespace Videos. It makes it easy to showcase your expertise, get your clients engaged with videos on your website. I could build a website about Squarespace. I might even reach out to them.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So head to squarespace.com heretohelp for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code here to help to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. This episode of the podcast We're Here to Help is brought to you by Hungry Root. Hungryroot is like having your own personal shopper and nutritionalist all wrapped into one. They Take care of the weekly grocery shopping, recommended healthy groceries and meals tailored to your taste, nutritional preferences and health goals. Hungry Root makes it easier, easy to eat, healthy and delicious. All of Hungry Roots recipes can be made in just 15 minutes or less. With over 15,000 recipes shipped each week, there's something for every taste and nutritional preference. I'm a man who is dairy free, but I like my food to taste good and Hungry Root has delivered.

[Hannah]

I got an eggplant chickpea hummus bowl that I'm going to tell my grandkids about.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I love me some Hungryroot.

[Hannah]

Take advantage of this exclusive offer for a limited time. Get 40% off your first box plus get a free item in every box for life. Go to hungryroot.com heretohelp and use code heretohelp that's hungryroot.com heretohelp code here to help to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your Choice for Life. Hungryroot.com hereto help code here here to help use that code. Gang, we love you.

[Gareth Reynolds]

This episode of We're Here to Help is brought to you by Herobred. I am currently on our 71 and a half of a 72 hour water fast and I'm about to read copy for Herobred, which is my favorite bread. I don't like Herobread. I love it.

[Hannah]

Herobred has really just made bread healthier, honestly. It's packed with protein, low net carbs, zero grams of sugar, high in fiber and it just tastes like regular bread. You're not going to eat this and be like, oh, this fell apart in my hands before it made it to my mouth.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I love the Hero bagels. I've been doing those. I love the Hero tortillas. I love the just regular old bread. For sandwiches. I've been doing Hero bread and butter toast that. Give me a break. You, you'd never know it's low net carbs and high fiber bread from the texture that is the truth. Get the soft fluffy experience you know and love.

[Hannah]

The first time we had it, which was a while ago, it was surprising. Now I'm used to it. Now I'm spoiled. Now I'm turning other people onto it, bringing it to barbecues for hot dogs or, you know, veggie hot dogs for me. Herobred is offering 10% off your order. Go to Hero Co and use code help at checkout. That's help at H E r o co, hero.co Hero Bread.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And then Rob, I need you to hide your Face so I just see Gareth.

[Hannah]

You got it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Wow, thank you. Just what I'm used to.

[Hannah]

That's so cute.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's a different thing.

[Hannah]

Shall we? Do you want me to.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'll start. Is the caller here?

[Hannah]

Yeah, yeah, they're here.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Hello.

[Jake Johnson]

Hello.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, you are here.

[Hannah]

Yeah, they're here, buddy.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Hey. How long have you been here? What have you been doing? Just eavesdropping?

[Jake Johnson]

Yeah, no, I. I've just been waiting my turn.

[Hannah]

What did you hear?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Cool. What'd you hear?

[Jake Johnson]

I heard nothing. Nothing.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Talk?

[Jake Johnson]

No.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Pesci of the asking Rob to take his face off so I could just see Gareth on the zoom.

[Jake Johnson]

I did hear that. I will say I did hear that.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And G's saying that was cute or what you say?

[Hannah]

Yeah, it's sweet. It's, it's, it's nice. It's, it's.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I literally just look at you. These ho. I'm used to it now with Rob there too, my eyes were going to two places.

[Hannah]

There was one at the very beginning. We had. So we. Jake was like, let's see him. Let's see what that's like. And we had the caller on zoom. And it was the weirdest experience ever because the. We were watching the person like process our insanity and we were like.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And we were too.

[Hannah]

Yeah, felt like a job interview.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Now, after about 350 of these calls, we got a system. Let's stick to it. Can we get your name, please?

[Jake Johnson]

Yeah, my name's Hannah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Hey Hannah, how you doing?

[Jake Johnson]

I'm doing great. How are you guys?

[Hannah]

Good, thank you. Pretty good.

[Gareth Reynolds]

We're just starting. Hannah, where. Where are you calling from?

[Jake Johnson]

I'm calling from upstate New York.

[Hannah]

Nice. Nice. Gareth, whereabouts please?

[Jake Johnson]

I'm gonna, I'm gonna hold.

[Hannah]

Address now, please.

[Gareth Reynolds]

For now, but zone like Buffalo or you near like Albany.

[Jake Johnson]

Closer to Buffalo.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay. Okay, great, great.

[Hannah]

Interesting. Noted.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What's your favorite meal?

[Jake Johnson]

Ooh, favorite meal. I'm a big spaghetti gal. Spaghetti and meatballs is probably my number one.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I would say. Steve Berg would also say spaghetti. I'm a spaghetti girl.

[Hannah]

I'm a. I'm a big spaghetti girl.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Steve Berg is a big spaghetti girl. So Hannah, a spaghetti girl from near Buffalo. Should we just get into this? Hannah?

[Jake Johnson]

Let's do it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What's your problem today? And we're going to try our hardest to help you.

[Jake Johnson]

Okay, awesome. So about two years ago, my husband and I moved to a small town and we didn't really know anybody, so we joined a bowling league. And then last year we bowled with a really Lovely older couple. And we had a blast. And you know, we did pretty well in the league and we made friends with some of the people who worked there at the bowling alley and just met a lot of people, so it was great. And then this season, that older couple wanted to bowl with some of their friends from church, which totally get love that for them. So we needed to find some new partners, obviously. And we asked my husband's older relative and his wife, who live in the same town as usual, to bowl with us because we thought that they would be a safe choice. And pretty immediately we realized that that was a huge mistake. And they've been a disaster for pretty much the whole season. They have gotten so drunk that we had to forfeit a game. They. Yeah, they also got so drunk that they started like making out on the benches inside the bowling alley. They like, pick fights with other teams. Everyone hates them. They sneak in vodka nips every week to try to like, save money on drinks. They dip the staff on tips. Like everyone hates them.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, they don't. So they're not just drunks, they're the worst.

[Jake Johnson]

Yeah, yeah, they're the worst.

[Hannah]

They're not like great drunks.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, they're not tipping people to start fights. They're making them. Cuz I was halfway through, I was like, do we like them?

[Jake Johnson]

Well, we hate them.

[Hannah]

It definitely doesn't help you from a bowling standpoint, but yeah, like, you know, you could be dealing with some people who are like enjoyable drugs.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. But they're belligerent there. Okay. And so these are your. This is your husband's sisters, you said?

[Jake Johnson]

No, so it's my husband's mom's second cousin. So like kind of a random connection. But still family, you said.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, but kind of.

[Hannah]

You went older again. Why? Just real quick, why going so old? You were dealing with old people. Did you think like, old. Did these people like to bowl? Did you ask that?

[Jake Johnson]

Yeah, no, they. They were pretty much. We were just like scrambling to find some people and we still don't like, know a ton of people in town who like, have random Thursday night availability. So we just kind of on a whim were like, they seem like a safe choice. We had like hung out with them a couple of times for dinner previously and they seemed really normal. And now we've like gotten ourselves into this situation where they suck and they've already started mentioning, like, bowling again with us next. We want to find a way to like, either make them not want to bowl with us next season or just like kick them out or replace them without causing, like, a stir in the family. Like, no family drama.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Understood. So you're already basically circling it and you're doing a great job of it, but just for the fun of the show, what is the specific question?

[Jake Johnson]

Yeah, so the question is, how can we make sure that we don't have to bowl with them next year without causing a huge family rift?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, I think this is something we could help with, Gary.

[Hannah]

Oh, absolutely.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I mean, this doesn't feel too hard.

[Hannah]

You have Let me ask one question. Wear a diaper, Go bowling in a.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Diaper, Let it get dirty. That's not what you were going to say, Gareth.

[Hannah]

What?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Literally say what you were going to say. I thought we were going to finish each other's sentence.

[Hannah]

No, no, no.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You go, man.

[Hannah]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Buddy, buddy, buddy, buddy. Hold on, Hannah, give me a second here. What.

[Rachel]

What's.

[Hannah]

What's the diaper pitch here? You're saying wear a diaper because. No, no, no, no, no. Jake, you don't.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I literally thought we were saying the same thing. We did the eye contact thing.

[Hannah]

Jake, Jake, this would be a good one to actually have Hannah's video because I would love to see her face when you said that. What? What?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'll tell you what, I would never want a bowl next to is an adult with a dirty dog.

[Hannah]

Okay, there we go.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Agree or disagree?

[Hannah]

I agree, but we. Maybe we don't need to go there yet. I don't think we're there yet, but I like.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Let's start at the beginning. Floor is yours.

[Hannah]

It's just a great. It's a great end there.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, no, no, there's a way. There's this. We're going to get a bell ring.

[Hannah]

I. I completely.

[Gareth Reynolds]

How crazy Hannah wants to get.

[Hannah]

Well, let me.

[Jake Johnson]

Let me just.

[Hannah]

Let me just see.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But Hannah, you're going to win here. You just have to drive the train. We're getting you off of this boat.

[Hannah]

You want Hannah to promise. You want Hannah to split her pants?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I promise you this is gonna happen.

[Hannah]

Would you be willing to put a diaper in this?

[Jake Johnson]

Probably not. Only because, like, I know a lot of other people in the league and at the bowling alley and I want.

[Hannah]

To, like, maybe you send out an email and you say, hey, Thursday, I'm pooping my pants.

[Gareth Reynolds]

How about your. How about your husband?

[Hannah]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I gotta tell you, it's also, like.

[Jake Johnson]

On the same page.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay. He's with you. Okay, so let's get rid of the diaper pitch.

[Hannah]

I love It.

[Jake Johnson]

Okay, I like that. I like where we're. Where we're starting.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's the bot. We're dropping something crazy there right now. We're going to go back and we're going to start building it small. But I wanted to know, this might have been a five minute call. He might have said, let's do it.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

We said, give us a follow up. Send us a.

[Hannah]

That's great. We'll both poop our pants. We don't even need the diapers.

[Gareth Reynolds]

We're cuckoo for cocoa again.

[Hannah]

My man. Let's party. Now, since these people don't bowl, are they going to be. Are they going to want to, like, go back to this bowling alley? Are they. If you cut them loose, are they even going to know that you're like, could you say to them, we're just not going to do it next year? And then you pick up different partners. Are they going to know that dangerous? It is a little bit.

[Jake Johnson]

So we've talked about doing that. The only thing is that they sometimes go to the bowling alley randomly to, like, play pool and like, hang out. Like, the bowling alley has pretty good food. Sometimes they'll just go there for like a meal, sit at the bar. And so I'm just worried that they're going to come in on league night and be like, what are you doing here?

[Gareth Reynolds]

But let's, let's put that on. Let's put that on the shelf for a second because we know where that could end. Right?

[Jake Johnson]

Okay. Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Now let me ask you a quick question. We all know all of our listeners are big bowling fans, myself included. We all know that the best thing you could do is hit. Get a 300. Turkey, Turkey, Turkey. 10 times. 13. With the 10th frame, Gareth has never heard Turkey, Turkey, 3, 300.

[Hannah]

Perfect game. Do you spin? Can I ask you this, sir? Do you spin?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Of course I sp.

[Hannah]

Well, I spend two. We're from the Midwest. Don't. Don't you dare bring that to me. I used to walk to Brown Deer Lanes and buy. I'm fine.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So here, here's my question to you, Hannah. Yeah. What do you, what do you bowl?

[Jake Johnson]

I will say last night I got a turkey, so.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Ah, you got turkey. That's three strikes in a row.

[Jake Johnson]

Yeah, I'm pretty. So, like, the highs are high, but the lows are pretty low.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But Hannah, what are we talking? Like, are you a 150 player? You a 180? You walk around at 210?

[Jake Johnson]

No, probably closer to 150.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, 150 and what does your husband walk around at?

[Jake Johnson]

Okay, he is a little higher. Probably like one 7180.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay. And what is this? Older, weird, second cousins, whatever. What do they bowl at?

[Jake Johnson]

First ten.

[Rachel]

Yeah.

[Jake Johnson]

Depends on the level of intoxication. When they're on their A game. He can bowl probably like a 130, 140. Dog life is, like, typically trying to break a hundred.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, so they're dog. So that's where I was gonna. This is what I was hoping to hear. I. I think there's another thing you say, hey, we love balling with you guys. You guys are a lot of fun. We are looking to win the thing next year, so we're gonna try to level up. And it's not personal. It's.

[Jake Johnson]

That could work. Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

They're like, look, I. You go like, I. I just bowled a turkey. Not to brag. That's when you get three in a row. It's called turkey, turkey, turkey.

[Hannah]

Are you.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And are you.

[Hannah]

Are you.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I walk. Yeah.

[Hannah]

Okay. Because I think. No, not you. You're fine.

[Rachel]

Jake.

[Hannah]

Jake keeps saying turkey, turkey, turkey.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Done it before.

[Hannah]

Yeah, I've done it before, too. What's your highest number?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Are we about to go to a bowling alley and compete against each other?

[Hannah]

I'll go anytime, buddy.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Who are the two hot floor hockey guys? Gareth and Jake. What's your. Pff, you geek. So our call would be, which one of us. We just want to both admit we're average at Bowen, but the other guy's got to admit he's also average.

[Hannah]

I mean, it'll be so great when neither of us breaks 100.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And then we both go, I'm really not good at spinning. It's hard, and it hurts my butt.

[Hannah]

Well, by the way, every time I like when I get back into it, it's just gutters, and I'm like, if it only got.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It just was so close, so frustrating. Then I get. I get three great sh today, where, like, back leg goes up perfectly.

[Hannah]

Oh, the leg is key.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And then I always do the hacky thing. Who do you think you are?

[Hannah]

I am the best. The best. Beat Weber.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Beat Weber. So back to you, Hannah. I think there is a move that you could say, hey, guys, just to let you know, again, this is not personal. We love playing with you. We love that you sneak in booze and you're utter trash and you don't tip the waitresses and you start fights. All of that we absolutely love. But next year, we've. There's been some talk about the League getting a little bit more competitive. So of course you guys could join. We would never kick you out, but we're looking for. We're going to try to level up and not even do it with, like, friends next year. We want to try to find people in the 200-00 to see if we can go up a tier. So that's just what we're going to do. But again, not personal. It's not because you're trash and you don't tip the waitresses and your alcoholics and you make out on the court and it's creeping everybody out. We love that because. It's simply because, Donna, you can't break a hundred deer.

[Hannah]

And by the way, my husband Andy pooped his pants tonight. It's called a turkey, and that's a flex.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, so, Hannah, what do you think of that idea? Just a. It's simply about the numbers. Well, you got in that zone.

[Hannah]

If I may add a little lie to it. If we want Jake, you could say you were already approached by another couple who are really good. And so you could just have that in the chamber and say, look, we. We want to win this thing. They're better bowlers. You know, no offense.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You know, it's. It's for a guy who's not a swinger. It's very similar to the swinger community. If you swing with a group and then new hot swingers come up, I'm sure you gotta upgrade.

[Hannah]

Absolutely.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Gareth, is that true?

[Hannah]

Well, I mean, it depends. Look, we're all. I mean, wait, what?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Who? On the fake turn, you didn't even fully sell it.

[Hannah]

I could have gone longer.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You could have gone hard.

[Hannah]

You're right.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It could have been more.

[Hannah]

You're right, you're right. I could have gone for it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So what do think about the new couple, Hannah? And is there a new couple you could reach out to? Is there somebody that you could say, hey, any chance you want to pair up next year? And then just say to them, y. Hey, sorry, we're playing with, you know, you know, Patrick and Monica. They're 200 bowlers. Whatever.

[Jake Johnson]

I. I think that could definitely work. And I love Gareth Spin of having it be like, they approached us.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes.

[Jake Johnson]

There is another couple who has this season, like, had trouble filling their team. Like, they can't consistently get people there every week. So they. And we're, like, pretty friendly with them. So I feel like in the off season we could coordinate with them and put together a team and then maybe even offer up to the cousins that, like, hey, if. If we ever need alternates, like, we'll.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Keep you guys in line so that.

[Jake Johnson]

Way it doesn't feel like we're stiffing them, but, like, obviously we'll never.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And you. But you could also say we're gonna need them and they're gonna need them. They've said that. Like, they miss a lot.

[Hannah]

Yep.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So would you guys be down to be the alts if we ever need it? And they'll go, like, sure. We don't care. We're just looking to drink vodka and fight each other and maybe have some makeout sessions.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And she'll go, I've never even got past 100.

[Hannah]

Yeah. And then you also.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I know I do it. I bowled a turkey.

[Hannah]

My hut. We get it. That's three strikes. And my husband Andy has pooped his diaper.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But I wouldn't do the diaper type with the new team.

[Hannah]

I would, I think, keep it going. Name a situation. It's not helping.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Dinner.

[Hannah]

Wrong.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Right. No, I'm right, but what do you.

[Hannah]

Think of that, Hannah?

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's bowling desserts. I think it smells like in here. I'm trying to eat some ice cream.

[Hannah]

Hey, Andy pooped.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What happened?

[Hannah]

Andy pooped. He's wearing diapers.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What does that mean? Andy pooped.

[Hannah]

He has a diaper.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Hold on. I'm trying to eat this Oreo cookie cake thing. It smells like Andy. It smells like you sat on.

[Hannah]

Yeah, Andy did, but remember, he got a turke.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What does that mean? You in your pants, buddy.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Three times. Back to back to back.

[Gareth Reynolds]

New turkey, Turkey.

[Hannah]

New turkey. Turkey, turkey.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think where we're leaning towards is this idea of a new couple that you don't reveal to mom's cousin until the last minute and use the. All you guys can be an alternate. Where are you at in that?

[Jake Johnson]

Yeah, I feel like they can't really argue with it if we position it as, like, oh, we actually want to, like, win some money and. And be in the top. Like, quarter.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The winners. The winners get money.

[Hannah]

Oh, y. Yeah.

[Jake Johnson]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

You have to pay to join. Be in the league. And then winners win.

[Jake Johnson]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Great. So there you go.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, then. And then it's very clean. You go like, they came to us and said, let's see if we can win this thing. And I think it's worth trying.

[Hannah]

I would get them in soon, so I would have that plan locked in place soon so that you could tell the other couple pretty quickly after the season's over, you know, next year. It's not happening. Give them time if they want to Try to join the league, by the way, which would be best case scenario. It would be great to have a shit show there, just to be, like, still around, but they're just not on your team.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And what do you think about in the meantime to ensure that there's not drama later? Because, look, I think we got a game plan that's going to win. But as we all know, the best way to get out of a relationship you want to get out of is to have them break up with you. There's also a play that we can make it so they dump you.

[Jake Johnson]

Like the diaper thing.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Like the diaper thing, but also, like, the. You start. You decide you're trying to do dry April, so you can't be around alcohol.

[Jake Johnson]

Oh.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So if they're drinking, go like, hey, guys, it's really triggering for me. I can't be around alcohol. And they go like, oh, she's the worst. You go, sorry, I'm just doing this weird thing. And they're like, okay. Hey, could you guys not swear? I'm trying to do. No swear. Spring.

[Hannah]

Hey, can you guys crap your diaper? We're doing crap our diaper December.

[Gareth Reynolds]

If you did all that with a dirty diaper, I'm quitting.

[Hannah]

I'm absolutely.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'm like, I'm having a beer. I'm bowling. You literally smell like.

[Hannah]

Look, look.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So, Hannah, what are you thinking?

[Hannah]

Hannah, we talked past. Where are you at this one?

[Jake Johnson]

I don't think I'm probably gonna do anything that makes myself smell bad.

[Hannah]

Okay.

[Jake Johnson]

To the point where other people don't want to be around me.

[Hannah]

Okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's fair. That's a choice.

[Rachel]

That's fine.

[Jake Johnson]

I do like the idea, and I feel like I have. Both of us have been, like, trying to, like, keep some distance and, like, not be as fun so that they won't want to, like, hang out with us too much.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But I like this mom's second cousin.

[Jake Johnson]

Yeah. Yeah. But I like the idea of maybe being like, the alcohol thing of, like, dry April or something.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You know, you could also do in terms of that you. You and your husband can be in a fake fight that's really passive aggressive and just ruin the vibe.

[Jake Johnson]

Ooh.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Because whenever you're around other people when they're fighting, it's so lame.

[Hannah]

What we could do. What we could do is if you wanted. I like what we have. But if you wanted off of that, you could, when you lose the next game or, like, the next matchup, have you or your husband get a little pissy, storm out something like that. Then you say, the reason why we can't do it with you guys anymore is because Andy, who didn't crap his pants in a diaper, Andy, he's taking it real seriously. So next year, I really want to level up so that I kind of can take this competitive aspect that I don't love about him out of the equation a little bit more.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But then, Hannah, if you do that, which I think is a smart play, you set it up, and that's after each. No, here's what you do after each one of your guys's shots. That's not a strike or a spare. Get mad at each other.

[Hannah]

Yeah, have him just. Okay, have him be.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But don't get mad at them.

[Hannah]

Yeah, no, this is between.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You just go like. You get an 8. And have them go like, come on, girl.

[Hannah]

That was right there.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And then go, come on. And then when the drunk lady, the other one goes, I got an 83. She's like, Hannah's getting yelled at for a 160. And she's yelling at. What are we calling him? Chad? Is your partner Chad?

[Jake Johnson]

You guys have been calling him Andy.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Andy. Did we just make up Andy?

[Hannah]

Yeah, you did, but let's go with it. Right?

[Gareth Reynolds]

It was like. Did you create that, Gareth?

[Hannah]

I believe so.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, so then all of a sudden, Ad get. Andy gets a strike. He gets a strike on his third one, you go, you didn't even get a turkey.

[Hannah]

Okay, so, Hannah, what do you think about that? How do you feel about. We've kind of thrown a lot at you. What do you think is your clear path? What are you going to take? What are you going to leave?

[Jake Johnson]

Okay, right now I'm thinking I love the last pitch because it sets the stage that we care more about the score than they do, than we initially, like, let on, and then they do, and that we're doing worse this year than we did last year. And that. That's, like, clearly getting to us. I think that sets the stage really nicely for us to then be, like, a couple weeks after the league ends to, like, send them a message saying, hey, we got approached by this other couple that is really good, and they want us to join their team next year. And we really want to, like, try to be at the top of the league. And if. If there are ever a need for alternates, like, we would love to have you guys on the team.

[Gareth Reynolds]

This is clean.

[Jake Johnson]

Yeah, I like that.

[Hannah]

I think you maybe want to rehearse a little bit with the.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, here's what I was about to.

[Hannah]

Say you want to see some Hannah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Pretend I'm Andy.

[Jake Johnson]

Okay?

[Gareth Reynolds]

And I want you to go for it here. It's the seventh frame. I'm at about a 172. I do the ball near the face, that my form is good. I walk up, I go a little bit from left to right. I do the perfect little banana. I throw. I got spin, but I'm a little bit to the right. Seven fall. Your reaction?

[Jake Johnson]

My reaction is no, no, don't tell me about it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, no, he just did it.

[Jake Johnson]

Okay?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I just.

[Jake Johnson]

We're doing this live. Okay?

[Gareth Reynolds]

We're doing it live. So now I just got the seven. I'm going to pick up the spare. I do the perfect little banana. I throw. I only knocked down two. There's one remaining. I missed.

[Jake Johnson]

What are you doing? I need you to get your head in the game.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Can we do it again with a little bit of heat, please?

[Hannah]

A little louder.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Pretend we're not in a library. Pretend we're in a bowling alley.

[Rachel]

Okay, okay, okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So I just got two.

[Jake Johnson]

Oh, my God. What are you doing? That's like the fifth frame in a row that you haven't closed.

[Gareth Reynolds]

All right, I'm doing the best I can. All right.

[Jake Johnson]

Okay, well, I need you to do better.

[Gareth Reynolds]

All right? I missed.

[Jake Johnson]

Hannah, I. I can't deal with this. I need you to step it up for these last frames. We're going to be losing to this other team.

[Hannah]

Hey, I, I.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay. Pretty good.

[Hannah]

I'm the lane over. I crapped my diaper.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You know, let me give you one more piece of advice, because we're getting really good here. I want less words, and I want a firework of anger and then a quick apology.

[Jake Johnson]

Oh, okay, okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Give me a 10 from the start and then catch yourself.

[Rachel]

Okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And I got three up there. I throw it. Two. Go. Damn it.

[Jake Johnson]

Oh, my God, not again.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's a 7.

[Jake Johnson]

7.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Let's see what a 10 looks like. I want you out of your goddamn comfort. You can. Okay. And two go down.

[Jake Johnson]

What the hell is your problem, Andy? I'm sorry.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You know what? If. If I was a drunk next to. You know, I'd go, she's fine. I'm playing with her next year. You're yelling to get them out of here.

[Jake Johnson]

But I thought we were going passive aggressive.

[Gareth Reynolds]

We probably are. This is probably just for the show.

[Rachel]

Okay?

[Jake Johnson]

Okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But now we're in a hole I created. I'm trying to get out.

[Jake Johnson]

Okay, okay, let's.

[Hannah]

Let's end it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But you keep doing it. Six out of ten.

[Jake Johnson]

I'm sorry.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Give me a goddamn ten.

[Jake Johnson]

Okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay. Two pins go down. Damn it.

[Hannah]

Oh, my God.

[Jake Johnson]

Andy, what are you doing?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Hit the goddamn yell, you. Andy. Now I want your maddest you. And go two pins go down you. Yes, you do that. And then apologize every time he misses a crazy like a crow.

[Hannah]

You.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Sorry.

[Hannah]

It's like having your therapist weep like, about his own stuff. It's just awesome.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You do that. That's a winning form.

[Hannah]

I love it. Can I add one thing and then we'll get out Hannah, show up to the next game with one of those bowling gloves on.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes.

[Jake Johnson]

Oh, okay. I can do that. And then before we go up the intensity.

[Hannah]

Yeah, like, you're. You're crazy.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Now, before we go to take us out, could you yell that you one more time at the same 10?

[Jake Johnson]

Yes. You.

[Hannah]

That's great. That's really good, actually. All right, Hannah, let us know how it goes. We're on your side. It's gonna be great. And again, if you got a job.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Nuclear crap and diaper on your pants, we're pretty good. Dude.

[Jake Johnson]

I know.

[Hannah]

All right, thank you, Hannah.

[Jake Johnson]

Thanks, guys.

[Hannah]

Bye. Bye. Holy shit, dude. Hello.

[Jake Johnson]

Hello.

[Hannah]

How are you?

[Rachel]

Good.

[Jake Johnson]

How are you?

[Hannah]

Good, thank you. Can we get your name, where in England you're calling from and approximate age and then we'll get into the problem.

[Rachel]

My name is Sarah. I'm actually New Zealander. I'm calling from New Zealander.

[Hannah]

Kiwi joke.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'm sorry about that. Sorry about Gareth.

[Hannah]

Sorry. So, Sarah, we are.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I know. We're getting tired. We'll pull it.

[Hannah]

All right. Sorry. Sarah, where in New Zealand are you?

[Rachel]

I'm in Auckland.

[Hannah]

Oh, beautiful.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And what international school did you go to?

[Hannah]

Jake, stop it. Just get into it. Sarah, hurry.

[Rachel]

Okay, all right.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Favorite animal in my backyard.

[Hannah]

Go quick, please shout your problem. And don't stop talking no matter what you hear.

[Rachel]

Okay, my problem. Every morning I sit in my bed and eat my breakfast.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Sit in your head?

[Rachel]

I have quite a big window that's like. I'm on the road, like a roadside and quite a big window. And there's a man that runs past with his dog. I'd say around 7:30 in the morning every day and just looks straight in. And every time, like, I. Like, I can sense him coming and so I look. And then of course, we both just lock eyes every day. And it's driving me insane as to why he a keeps running by and looking in and doesn't think, oh, I probably should not do that and go on the other Side of the road. And that is my problem because I also see him sometimes at the dog park and he never stops. He's always running. So I've never been able to, like, vibe dogs. I've never been able to kind of like, let my dog meet his dog just to get a sense of him. I just. Yeah.

[Hannah]

What. What exactly is your issue with it? Is it that he's running or that he's looking in or you're just puzzled by all of his beh.

[Rachel]

I just don't know why he's looking in.

[Hannah]

Okay, so looking in is the issue.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Sarah, I just got to get clear on this. I'm a little confused. A guy, a peeping Tom looks in your window every day?

[Rachel]

Well, yeah, I mean, I. I've not called him a peeping Tom, but yes, he.

[Hannah]

They call him spying Gary's there Spying Sams? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a lucky Luke. What room are you. What room are we going in? Are we talking like living room? Bedroom?

[Rachel]

I'm in my bed. Yeah, I'm in my bed and I'm looking out the window and I obviously, like, I could close it, but I want the morning light.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But hold on. We're talking about a looking Luke looking in your window every morning. One quick thing. We don't want to have to close it. We don't want bloats. You're allowed to look out your window.

[Hannah]

I agree. I think our solve is, I mean, you're calling the show because you don't want to do that, so. Which I understand. I mean, it's your. Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And so is there any feeling. Feeling of unsafety? Who is this guy? What's your vibe with this guy?

[Rachel]

Well, so I used to have a flatmate who lived here, and she would sit outside in the morning to have her breakfast, and I thought he was like flirting with her because she'd always be like, hey, look, you know, and.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So he's thinking he's creating a meet cute.

[Rachel]

Yeah. But then I was like, well, she's gone now, so I'm like, stop looking in.

[Hannah]

A couple questions. What is the approximate age of this man?

[Rachel]

I'm gonna say late 40s.

[Hannah]

No, he's not. Jake, stop it. You sound crazy. Everybody thinks you do read the emails. So you read the email. I can't. I don't know the password. Okay. Late 40s. What time of day is this happening? Like I. You said, is it morning?

[Rachel]

Yeah, it's like 7:30 almost every morning.

[Hannah]

Early in the morning. Okay. Yeah, it's weird.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I got My first pitch.

[Hannah]

All right, go.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You think it's too early?

[Hannah]

No, I don't. I, I. Well, the. The look, when he's looking. I know this feeling of, like, just looking. There's a difference between looking and leering. Sometimes you do a look because there's. Careful.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I say this as a friend.

[Hannah]

I think he could just be looking over because there's.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Every morning in the same window of a woman in her bed.

[Hannah]

I don't. This. I agree. He's. I agree. Okay, just stop.

[Gareth Reynolds]

My man. Love you, brother. Love you and care about your future, brother. Care about your career, brother. Not worth it. It's just a stupid podcast, brother. Big career head. You got a great life, brother. Okay, so here's my first pitch Tooth. It's in two parts. One is a sign that says, what are you looking at? And two is an air horn. And when he looks, you blast the air horn and it makes him jump. And it's basically just getting him out of this routine where he goes, like, I looked in there and she blew an air horn. What the hell is that? Or a sign that says, stop staring. Yes, I'm talking to you.

[Rachel]

Oh, my God.

[Hannah]

Good start.

[Rachel]

So do I. Do I have the sign up just all. All day, or.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, you know the time he's coming in, the sign goes up at 7:25. Once you wake up, 7:35.

[Rachel]

Once you wake up, put my sign.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Out and you go like this. Hey, pal, stop leering.

[Hannah]

You know, this is a great job.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Like this. Go like this. Leering and looking is the same thing.

[Hannah]

So. Dude, I lost my. Just. That's a great start. And I think anybody relates to a looking leering debate. I mean, it's age old. No, no, you're right. Absolutely. No, no. I love you, but I love you back, buddy. This is a great start. What we could do instead of. Because that's obviously a very bold move.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But you're also not talking to anyone specific, Gareth.

[Hannah]

I know, but we could also have a little more fun with it. Like, we could be setting little scenes that. That make him not want. Like, what if you just wore a Jason mask? And when he looks over at that time, you have a Jason mask on and you sort of just look out and maybe you build off that where there's just a couple things that, by the way, even.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What if it's not creepy, you're creating. There's another thing here. You could create a weird. Do you have other roommates?

[Rachel]

No, just a dog.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay. We could create a storyline that, like, he's Putting together a mystery. But the problem with this is we're just having him look more.

[Hannah]

It's a slippery slope. Because we don't want to create more intrigue.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes.

[Hannah]

Because then he. Then he could be leering and there's a huge. There's a chasm of difference. Okay.

[Rachel]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

But. But it might be good to start with a Jason mask just to see if you could creep him out a little. And then maybe. Maybe we move to a sign or something like that that just makes him feel comfortable about what's going there. I think what we want to. What we want to do is make it so that he' Like, I don't wanna.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I don't wanna do that.

[Hannah]

I don't want her to know about me looking. Yes. Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So you've got some early pitches. Sarah, where you at? Let's hear from you.

[Rachel]

I. I don't think I'm gonna do the air horn because I don't want any neighbors to then check in every morning why I'm doing that. But I do like the sign, and I worry about the mask. I think either. I don't want to become the wearer.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Agreed.

[Hannah]

Okay. I think that's.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What. What are you thinking of that sign? What are you thinking of it saying? What's the intention? Just kind of stream of conscious. Ramble a little bit.

[Rachel]

So he's always running with the dog, and he's always wearing a blue T shirt. So I could pinpoint him and say, hey, blue T shirt. What you looking at?

[Hannah]

Also crazy. That's crazy. He always has on a blue T shirt. Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

The same one?

[Rachel]

I think so.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Pretty close.

[Hannah]

He's always.

[Rachel]

Sweetie, by the time he gets to my house, he must live far away.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. Okay, so now question for you, Sarah. Do you want to fully pinpoint him?

[Rachel]

I. I mean, I'm not against it or like the humor of it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes. Because one of the things I like is we're trying to just get him to stop.

[Jake Johnson]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So if it's very specific him, then he's gonna feel like, should I do some sort of response? Is this a game?

[Hannah]

I think if it's cutesy or, like, funny. I think that's intriguing. He's like, oh, she's playing the game.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And then he might do a sign that says, like, yeah, he. Hey, you, underpants. And he leaves a note. Yes.

[Hannah]

So I. If I like the idea that we don't think he lives right in your neighborhood. So you're not going to go walk and get a coffee and, you know, see him. But I would.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think there's. Yeah, go ahead.

[Hannah]

I would go for it. I would just be like, hey, joggers, don't look in. You know, I'm not an aquarium, Okay.

[Rachel]

I like joggers because that creates this.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Rachel]

I don't want to be that weird.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Stop staring.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Not a zoo. Don't look in.

[Rachel]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, but you're only putting it to him.

[Sarah]

Yeah.

[Rachel]

Well, maybe just a sign that says, like, stop looking. Just generic.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes.

[Rachel]

And then.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Although. No, I'll tell you why I don't like that. Because it's almost like an art project. Stop looking. So that I should look.

[Rachel]

Yeah, yeah.

[Hannah]

It's also. It's just kind of weird. It's like a weird. Like, I kind of understand that. It's just weird to have a window to the street in your bedroom. What do you got?

[Gareth Reynolds]

How about a sign? Because. What? I don't want it to be too open for everybody. What about walk your ugly dog elsewhere? Stop staring.

[Hannah]

See, I want it to be more for. Maybe this is a problem with all joggers. And I want him to be like, oh, okay, what about this?

[Gareth Reynolds]

What the hell are you staring at, pervert?

[Hannah]

That's pretty good.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Because if I was walking by and every day I, like, looked in a window and then I saw that sign, I would get an instant stomachache and go, like, who's the perfect? I'm not the perfect.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And then you're like, I'll never look there again. Like, you'd go right into panic mode. I don't want to be a pervert. Then you go, what am I looking at? Why am I looking in? That woman's win. What is happening?

[Hannah]

Well, you know, we could also do. We could come up with, like, three or four that you're just rotating. Like, that could be one of them. Like, we could have, like, stop looking in.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Pervert.

[Hannah]

Just like, it's not an aquarium. Don't stare.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes.

[Hannah]

Like something like that. We could just have a few that you rotate and you just put up in the morning as soon as you get up.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think that's right.

[Hannah]

And after, like, a week or so, you could just kind of see if there's some kind of difference. Maybe.

[Rachel]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Sarah, how you feeling about this?

[Jake Johnson]

I think.

[Rachel]

I think it works. I'm not going to call him a pervert.

[Hannah]

Okay.

[Rachel]

I think if I antagonize.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Rachel]

I just think of. But I think a sign that's like, you know, what are you looking at? Then again, if I rotate it every day, he's like, oh, what's the next message gonna say?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think it will. I think there's one side.

[Hannah]

So let's go with one.

[Rachel]

One sign.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What would be the dream sign, Sarah? You like zoo? You like aquarium? Was that. Was that a street you want to walk down or. No?

[Rachel]

Yeah, I think.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think.

[Rachel]

Yeah, I think this is. It's not an aquarium. Stop looking or something like that. I don't know. Can you read? What did you say about be brave?

[Gareth Reynolds]

There's something about. This isn't. Here's what we don't want. We don't want him to stop and have to read the sign and look more.

[Hannah]

How about a big sign that just says looking into random people's bedrooms is illegal or is weird?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Because it's not.

[Hannah]

It's weird. It's not illegal. We don't know the law over there. Strange nation.

[Rachel]

Kind of. Kind of specific, but not pointed. It's like, keep running. Stop looking.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, yes.

[Hannah]

Yes. Love that. Yep.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Keep running. Stop looking is perfect.

[Hannah]

Great.

[Sarah]

Okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Because then you're saying to all the runners, you guys are being weird.

[Hannah]

I like that. I like it.

[Rachel]

Okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That would change my habit.

[Hannah]

Yes. And it's quick too. You know, it's perfect.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Punchy nat attack. What do you think? My only concern is that it has to be big. It has to be big enough that he's not coming closer to the window.

[Rachel]

That's my concern.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's like, yeah, that's right.

[Sarah]

Big.

[Hannah]

Big. That's why I like few words. It's very quick. But yeah, let's go big.

[Rachel]

So he can't. He can't come up to my house.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Unless he agree we don't want him closer.

[Rachel]

But I will make it big. It's a big window.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Bigger the better. You know what you could do to make it really big on that first day for one day? Let it fill the whole window.

[Rachel]

Yeah. Okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

This is a really big thing.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Yep.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And you. You told him what time does he come by your house every day? You said it's the same time.

[Jake Johnson]

It's about 7:30 in the morning, which is now.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Did he come by it?

[Rachel]

Which is around now. I haven't seen him. Now I'm watching, like, the creek.

[Hannah]

Interesting. Just give him the finger.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think this is going to work. Are you gonna do it?

[Rachel]

I'm gonna do it. Yeah.

[Hannah]

Take a picture. Send us a picture of the sign. Let's have a look. See?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think it's great.

[Hannah]

I do too.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Sir, are you happy? Are you gonna do it?

[Rachel]

I'm happy.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Rachel]

I'm Gonna do it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, thank you for calling.

[Hannah]

Thank you for calling.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Please follow up.

[Rachel]

Okay, thanks.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, bye. This episode of We're Here to Help is brought to you by booking.com booking. Yeah. Every time I use booking.com to find a place to stay in the US I know they'll have exactly what I'm looking for.

[Hannah]

Listen, I talk about booking.com very regularly because I use booking.com very regularly. I always know I can find exactly what I'm looking for. I just went down to Florida for the first time in quite a while. While I was there, decided to get a place right on the water. Use booking.com. was able to just find a lovely place while I had a show down here. Room, kitchen, the whole thing. Sometimes I do it for hotels. This time I did it for a different spot, like somewhere, like I said, right by the beach. But it is the best, so can't recommend using it enough. You really know what you're getting. That's why I use it a lot of times. I use the booking.com app, are able to see all your options, all the filters. You know the deal. Come on. You know the deal. I don't know why I'm angry at you.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No matter who you are, Booking.com helps you find the stay. That's ridiculously right for you.

[Hannah]

Find exactly what you're booking for on booking.com booking. Yeah. Hello.

[Sarah]

Hi.

[Hannah]

Hi. Welcome to the show.

[Sarah]

That's.

[Hannah]

We're here to help, in case you weren't sure. You're on with Jake. You're on with Gareth. Can we get your name, approximate age, where you're calling from, and your first concert, please?

[Sarah]

And my first concert. So my name is Rachel. My approximate age is 41. Where we're calling from is Edinburgh at the moment, but we're from South Africa and first concert, I think was actually a Christian concert. DC Talk.

[Hannah]

Oh, we love DC Talk here. We're big fans of DC Talk.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What's your favorite album from DC Talk? Earth.

[Sarah]

Jesus Freak.

[Hannah]

Yeah, that's what I was gonna say. No, that was for me. But it's awesome that we have that album.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What's your favorite song from Jesus Freak? Not obviously, Jesus Freak. What's another one?

[Hannah]

You really love nailing it. Now Rachel. Now Rachel. So you are South African. Jake was starting to do his international school bit because he assumed that you were English, sort of. But Jake, the South African accent is very complicated. So you haven't.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I know it. I spent some time in Namibia, which is near South Africa. That's not even you haven't. It is, yes, I.

[Hannah]

What's the cap? What's the capital of South Africa?

[Gareth Reynolds]

What the fuck was this? Geography class?

[Hannah]

Well, I mean, you spent some time there. You think you know.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I know my people. I don't study a math.

[Hannah]

You think you'd know one of the three capitals. You think you know one of the three. Hold on.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Rachel.

[Hannah]

Rachel, don't jump in. Jake. You don't know one of the. It's three capitals. Jake, don't jump in. Rachel.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What are the capitals?

[Hannah]

I mean, I got this. Rachel. Cape Town. Rachel Bloomfontein.

[Sarah]

That is correct.

[Gareth Reynolds]

He's so confident right now, it's disgusting.

[Hannah]

I've never. I've never seemed smarter in my life. Okay, Rachel, what. What can we help you with? What's going on?

[Sarah]

So this is actually a little bit of a feedback. So my husband and I got married two weeks ago, and three days before our wedding, we were working out in our gym. I was on the treadmill and he was lifting weights to get. And he was listening. Yeah, he was listening to We're Here to help because we listened often. So he was busy lifting and he said. He just burst out laughing. And he turned to me and he said, I think we should re. Look at our first dance song. So he said, you have to listen to the latest episode. So I obviously listened because I'm a good wife and I listen to my husband and I heard the Ballad of Mrs. Gingerbread.

[Hannah]

So he said, I had a feeling.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I saw this email.

[Sarah]

He said it would be absolutely ridiculous. We can't do that. So I was like, okay, sure. Possibly not. Got into the car, took my kids to school. He took his kids to school. And on the way to school, I played the song for my kids. And then I said to them, guys, what do you think of me changing up the sort of songs for the wedding? And they were obviously on board because children. So on the way back from school, I phoned the DJ and I said, I've got an idea. I'm sorry to do this two days before the wedding, but can we include this as the second song where the kids will catch masks and dance with us? And I said, please don't tell Brandon because he doesn't know.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So Brandon's the fiance, the now husband.

[Sarah]

Brandon's the fiance, now husband, yes.

[Hannah]

Smart to not tell him exactly.

[Sarah]

This is. It's good to surprise people every once in a while.

[Hannah]

Andy probably say no. Yeah, okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Keep going, Rachel.

[Hannah]

Keep going, keep going.

[Sarah]

So we got home and later that afternoon I told his Kids, because I had a little family meeting, minus Brandon. So told his kids, this is my plan. And they said, oh, we've heard the song. Dad played it for us in the car on the way to school this morning. So that was just my confirmation that I had done the right thing. Wow.

[Hannah]

I mean.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So then what happens?

[Sarah]

So then we have the wedding two days later, and we're all sitting at our table. It was family and friends. It was absolutely the most amazing day. And first dance comes up. So we go up and we start dancing. And I said to the kids in front of him just before, guys, remember, you have to come up as soon as the second song starts playing. And he looked at me and said, what is the second song? And I said, you'll see. So then for the whole first dance, he had.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What is. What is the first song?

[Hannah]

Good question.

[Sarah]

So the first song was. It's by a South African artist, but it's quite. Can't even remember the name.

[Hannah]

Okay. Very important to you. You guess what song you remember the name to. The second one.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, the first song is pretty sentimental. It's. Is it a. Like, is it a slow dance? Is it more DC Doc?

[Sarah]

No, definitely not DC talk. We've. We've grown out of that phase.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So it's a nice slow dance that means something to you too.

[Sarah]

Yes. Slow down.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You guys are looking at each other's eyes. I can't believe we found each other. Life is beautiful. That's the first song.

[Sarah]

Well, found each other again because we dated in high school, so 20 years later we started dating again.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That happens a lot. That happened to my buddy Bill, who I was just in Portland with.

[Hannah]

Facebook and social media makes that a lot more possible than it used to be because you follow someone and then you're like, oh, yeah, I remember this. Then you slide into the DMs. Then the next thing you know, you're dancing to a cat song. Yeah.

[Sarah]

The next thing you know, it's.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The story is clownless. Oldest time.

[Hannah]

Yeah, I mean, we've heard it a thousand times.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You do the first song, it's a hit. You guys are looking at each other. In your eyes, you're remembering what it was like as high school loves. Now a grown up loves. Then take us through the moment before you decide to put. I think the name of the song is I love you, Mrs. Gingerbread.

[Rachel]

Yeah, yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The Ballad of Mrs.

[Sarah]

Gingerbread.

[Hannah]

Ballad of this. Unbelievable.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Incredible.

[Sarah]

So we're looking into each other's eyes. It's incredibly romantic. And then the first chord starts Playing and he looks at me wide eyed. And then I just burst out laughing. And he took, he said afterwards he took a couple of seconds to recognize what it was because he had no idea what was coming. And then he realized. And then he actually ran off the dance floor after the kids came up. So the kids came up, danced with us. And then he thought, I have to film this. So he didn't realize I had already spoken to about five guests. Please film this particular moment.

[Hannah]

You two are meant for each other.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, it's a good match.

[Sarah]

Yes, we are.

[Gareth Reynolds]

About how many, about how many people were at this wedding?

[Sarah]

There were 45 people.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, wonderful. And then, you know, we just did an interview Gareth and I did for Rolling Stone. And one of the things they said, the woman said that she likes about the show is the world building. I think this is the epitome of the world building.

[Hannah]

Well, she also specifically commented on Mrs. Gingerbread. And we were sort of talking about the odd reach The Ballad of Mrs. Gingerbread has had.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Like to the point where like people in our real lives are going like, oh, man, it sounds like it's just very.

[Gareth Reynolds]

In your real life.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Anyway, the point is that both of us have felt the impact, but what.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I will say, the impact for me hitting going back, because we just did that interview, I think it was yesterday or the day before you heard a song, then you played it at your wedding. Imagine those other 45 people, they're at a regular wedding. They're like, oh, this. Because it's a crazy.

[Hannah]

The song's insane. The song is in. I mean, from the second, it's like to be able to go back and listen to it for the first time again is like watching the Sixth Sense for the first time.

[Gareth Reynolds]

By the way, the lady, the woman who wrote it has a link for. It's now on Spotify. Not connected to our show. It's just out there. Which means somebody's random mix. They could be like, you know how Spotify recommends stuff for you? They could be like, I love this song by DC what the hell? I love you, love you.

[Hannah]

This is Gingerbread.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Some kid might. Or some person might hear that and go like, who's this band? Like, I love.

[Hannah]

Mrs. Gingerbread's getting bookings in Reno.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And so it's. We're gonna watch the clip. And for anybody, now that we're an audio only, we will put the whole clip on Instagram so you can see that. But will you tell us how it went first before we watch it and what happened after Rachel.

[Sarah]

So how it went was quite phenomenal because not very many people understood or recognized the song. And it was an incredibly emotional wedding. We made every single person cry just before that. So we put that on and then most people didn't have any reference to what it was. So it was a little bizarre.

[Hannah]

Nor should they.

[Sarah]

Which, I mean, the song is.

[Hannah]

Yes. Yeah. The song is extremely bizarre.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's a big time inside joke.

[Hannah]

And I know it's not a short song.

[Sarah]

No. And we can. Kept the whole thing on.

[Hannah]

Yeah, that's.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, my God.

[Sarah]

So first it was Brandon and I dancing. Then the kids ran up. We called them up because they didn't actually listen to my instruction that they should just come up. So we called them up and they danced with us in a very awkward circle. You'll see.

[Jake Johnson]

It's.

[Sarah]

It's not. It's not pretty.

[Hannah]

It's a hard song to dance to, to be fair.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Especially at your parents wedding in front of 45 people.

[Hannah]

Yes.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I wouldn't know what to do.

[Hannah]

No.

[Sarah]

Yeah. And then one of our friends came up because we kept asking people to come up and dance with us. They just didn't.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I was like, no, Makes no sense. But also, because it's not like a. A banger that everyone.

[Hannah]

There's no beans.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But also. What am I dancing to? I love you.

[Hannah]

What is this?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Thinking of you.

[Hannah]

I'm getting more and more excited before we watch Jake pin it. So you see big video version.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, so then that's a good idea. Look at you, Mr. Technology.

[Hannah]

I help my. I help my boy out, you know.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And so then you do the song. And then before we go and watch it, which we're gonna. We're gonna. Everybody comes up and dance. Did people say anything afterwards? Was there any reaction to it?

[Hannah]

Are you guys okay?

[Sarah]

Nothing. Nothing.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Nobody. Nobody even brought it up.

[Hannah]

Nobody was like, what was that?

[Sarah]

No, no.

[Jake Johnson]

And I think.

[Sarah]

I think people understand that we're just those people. So they just didn't ask.

[Hannah]

So I don't know if those people have ever existed before.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think a lot of them do.

[Hannah]

The Mrs. Gingerbread Couple. This has to be a trend. I'm calling on our audience to now, if you're getting married, add a second song and it is the balance.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I don't think it needs to be a second song. You know what?

[Hannah]

I think it could be first song. Aisle. Walking down the aisle. You're right.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think that's the play at every wedding. If you're a fan of the show. It can be deep in the night when everybody's drunk, you know, like, we did a few do things. We're at weddings, we do like bets what's going to happen next.

[Hannah]

Yes.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Just throw this on with the dj, film it and then call in. Because anytime you would have a wedding party, this could become a niche ymca.

[Hannah]

Oh, my God.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Or Brown Eyed Girl shout shot, where you're like, at a certain point of the night, you got to throw that weird gingerbread. Gingerbread cat song on. That's a banger. That's an end of the night, everybody's drunk banger.

[Hannah]

You know what that is? That's how you let everyone know the wedding's over.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

It's the closing time.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I love you, love you, love you.

[Hannah]

Oh, the pop version.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You know what I would love?

[Hannah]

Covers. Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, also, I would love somebody who to sample this and put a cool wrap over it.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes, that would be cool. Just give this a real second look.

[Hannah]

Emily from Rolling Stone. You want world building. How's this?

[Jake Johnson]

This?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, that would be some goddamn. And if. Also if it's cool and you go, like hell, yeah. That's a rethinking of this goddamn song. And so, Rachel, congrats on the wedding.

[Hannah]

Yes, thank you.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'm really glad you played it. I'm glad it worked. Well, and then. Well, yeah, and then. Gareth, for the audio only, while we're watching it, why don't you just kind of say what you see?

[Hannah]

All right. I'll lay him with some light commentary. Yeah, okay. And like Jake said, go to our socials if you want to watch this. Here we go. We've got a beautiful light show going on. They, the lovely couple feels miles away on their own on an island.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Cool guy at the bar, too.

[Hannah]

Yep. Yeah. Guy at the bar putting the vibe out. Okay, so that's the end of the first song, I think. And now I recognize is. So now the husband is slowly understanding what the hell's happening. Kids are running out as this song blasts.

[Gareth Reynolds]

A great awkward family dance.

[Hannah]

This dance they don't know how to dance to a song with barely any beats.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I mean, it all holding hands and kind of moving in and out.

[Hannah]

They're ring around posing now nobody's moving now everybody. Everyone's just standing there. Everyone's standing there.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The guy at the bar has left.

[Hannah]

The scene has left. Nobody's laughing, really. Except for you guys.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Holy Rachel. Really good stuff. We will post the whole thing on the Instagram. All videos, obviously on Patreon. Rachel, that's phenomenal.

[Hannah]

Awesome. Thank you and congratulations. To you, your family, to us, and mainly to Mrs. Gingerbread, who continues to have a legacy.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That I didn't see coming.

[Hannah]

Me either.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And so I think what we're saying to the community is that maybe this is just the start.

[Hannah]

Yeah, that's up to you guys.

[Sarah]

We have so many. I mean, We've got an 18 year old birthday party this year. We can play that. We've got multiple big events. So this just is becoming part of.

[Hannah]

Our lives and I think that the world is in need of healing and maybe this is a small band aid.

[Sarah]

Exactly.

[Hannah]

Thank you, Jake.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Rachel, we appreciate you. You're the best. Congrats on the wedding.

[Hannah]

Thanks a lot, Rachel.

[Jake Johnson]

Okay, guys, bye.

[Hannah]

Wow, that is, I would say before.

[Gareth Reynolds]

We go to the next one, that's a. Ring a bell.

[Hannah]

Oh, yeah, that's a building.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You know, that was cheating because it's not a real follow up. I saw that email and asked her to come on.

[Hannah]

Oh, really? We're still ringing it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, ring it. But that's a victory. We're Here to Help is hosted by Jake Johnson and Gareth Reynolds. If you'd like to be on the show, please email us your question@ HelpfulPod gmail.com. and if you want to watch video episodes of We're Here to Help, you can go to our [e-mail] heretohelpod to see our entire catalog.

[Hannah]

We're Here to Help is produced by Rabbit Grimm Productions executive producers Rob Hollis.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Jeff Porter and Natalie Hollis.

[Hannah]

Associate producer Jesse Thurston. Editing, mix and master by Chris Faller, Theme song by Oliver Raleigh. The COVID artwork is by James Fosdike, animations by Andrew Strill. And if you'd like to see Gareth do Stand up on the road, go to garethreynolds.com Remember, all the advice given on We're Here to Help is for entertainment purposes only and all listeners should be adults and make their own decisions.

[Gareth Reynolds]

All video episodes of season one are available now on Patreon, and season two video episodes will be available every Monday starting January 20th. Go to patreon.com heretohelp pod hey, I'm Wayne Brady.

[F]

And I'm Jonathan Mangum. And we're two big improv nerds who get a chance to play and make stuff up on shows like who's Is It Anyway? Or let's Make a Deal.

[Hannah]

And we're now hosting a new improvised show called what if on the Headgum Podcast Network.

[F]

And on what if? We believe that improvisation is a conversation, so we get to have conversations with guests from the worlds of tv, film, tech, and literature. Guests like Bobby Moynihan, Aisha Tyler, LeVar Burton, and Adam Conover. We ask them the big, ridiculous questions, like what if you heard of monkey's feelings?

[Hannah]

What if your grandma was a secret agent?

[F]

What if Jonathan was invited to the cookout up? I'm not. And then we turn the conversation into spontaneous scenes, songs. Well, because that's what we do.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Subscribe to what if on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Pocket Casts, or wherever you get.

[Hannah]

Your podcasts, and watch episodes on YouTube.

[F]

No script, no net, Just what if.