Transcript

Jake Johnson (0:00)

And we are brought to you. Rocket Money.

Gareth Reynolds (0:08)

Yeah, yeah. Rocket Money.

Jake Johnson (0:10)

We are brought to you by.

Gareth Reynolds (0:12)

We are brought to you by Rocket Money. Well, Jake, people know what Rocket Money is. It's a personal finance app that if you have subscriptions. We've both talked about this before. You have subscriptions, you're still paying, and you feel beaten down when you realize you've been paying for something for eight months that you don't use or you don't want.

Jake Johnson (0:31)

Yeah.

Gareth Reynolds (0:31)

So Rocket Money helps you find those and lower your bills and grow your savings.

Jake Johnson (0:36)

So I did Rocket Money when they started sponsoring us. And what I like about it is I have gotten word there's a few subscriptions that I have been paying for, and it's not a lot. It'll be like 4.99amonth.

Gareth Reynolds (0:47)

Oh, yeah, I had that.

Jake Johnson (0:48)

I had an 1199 one. I didn't even know what they were. I had this really embarrassing moment where I thought I was on top of my finances. And then I looked and I was like, I don't even know what that. I guess it was a game on some app that I bought for somebody else on my. I'm like, I don't know. Maybe it was a. I don't know. But it's nice to. It's like, cancel all of it.

Gareth Reynolds (1:10)

Oh, yeah. They figure it out. They make you. And you don't have to tell anyone about these subscriptions you're finding, like Jake just did, because that was a little embarrassing. But either way, we love Rocket Money. Start saving today@rocketmoney.com help.

Jake Johnson (1:44)

And we are back.

Gareth Reynolds (1:48)

Back. Change a Wednesday and a little bit of a change up on the Wednesday.

Jake Johnson (1:55)

This is what we pitched, Gareth. This is what we promise. Mondays are just you and me and calls Wednes.

Gareth Reynolds (2:00)

Wednesday's the lab.

Jake Johnson (2:01)

Summary

We're Here to Help – Episode 208: Best Advice Vol 1: Bare Bowling It

Podcast Hosts: Jake Johnson & Gareth Reynolds
Date: September 17, 2025
Format: Call-in style, listeners share the best advice they've given or received
Episode Theme: Experimenting with a new, rapid-fire format where callers recount memorable or impactful pieces of advice from their lives, followed by Jake and Gareth’s comedic takes and reflections.

Overview

In this “Best Advice Vol 1” episode, Jake Johnson and Gareth Reynolds shake up their usual podcast dynamic. Instead of dishing out advice, they invite listeners to share the best advice they've either been given or have dispensed themselves. With characteristic banter and unscripted digressions, the hosts react to each story—with some wild riffs, a few debates, and even the occasional compassionate moment. The result is a mix of laughs, genuine insight, and the recurring conclusion that sometimes “the best advice” is surprisingly practical (or odd).

Key Discussion Points & Segments

1. The New Format & Steve Berg’s “Food Bit” Legacy

[01:44–05:31]

The hosts establish the new episode format: callers presenting best advice, rapid-fire style.
Jake and Gareth reminisce about their friend Steve Berg’s improv scenes, always based around food.
- Memorable moment: Gareth describes Berg's “food improv” as:
  “If Steve Berg was standing out on stage and you walked out there to join him, there's a 95 to 98% chance it's going to be food... He’s going to go, ‘this spaghetti came out perfect. But I'm worried we're not going to have enough.’” (04:05)
Steve is validated as a genuinely good cook thanks to a casserole that sustained Gareth during hard times.
Quote:
“Steve came over with a real big casserole that saved me.... I was eating microwavable pizzas that were 10 for $10 at Vons on a level that was completely unhealthy.” – Gareth (05:17–05:31)

2. Caller Abby: Handling Late Shoe Shop Customers

[06:46–13:33]

Abby from Somerset, UK, shares advice given to coworkers: how to get late-arriving customers out of the shop when there’s no overtime.
- Abby’s approach: She claims the warehouse computer system shuts off at closing time, so no more shoes can be brought out.
- “When they get angry, it's generally pointed towards the computer system and not towards me or my colleagues.” (11:59)
Jake and Gareth riff ways to expedite slow customers:
- Have someone yell from the back, “locking the doors.”
- Play loud “closing time” music.
- Have a friend attempt to shop late to demonstrate store closure.
The segment ends in a comedic spiral with Jake and Gareth doing absurd customer shtick (e.g., “I'm an old man, I want to try on a shoe!”) and pleading for Abby to hang up as she’s “staying too long in the store.”

3. Caller Brian: Reinventing Chore Time with “Two-Minute Game Breaks”

[14:10–21:36]

Brian from Dayton, OH, tells how the podcast inspired him and his wife to treat household chore conflicts as if calling into the show, pitching creative solutions.
Game-changing advice: After each completed chore, the first daughter gets a “two-minute game break” with dad—chosen activity (Throw Throw Burrito, tickle fights, Nerf gun battles, etc.)
- “It makes it fun... The last 10 minutes are enjoyable, and it’s actually pretty sweet because these are times you know, whenever we get back.” (18:05)
- Nerf gun twist: Brian cocks the Nerf gun as a reminder to get back to chores—a playful motivator.
Discussion on keeping chores cooperative, not competitive (“One girl doesn’t like competition, so that started in tears”).
Jake and Gareth endorse gamifying chores, sharing their own household strategies.

4. Caller Ruth: The “Bare Bowling” Revelation

[24:44–34:11]

Ruth from Chicago shares a family anecdote: her young cousin thought the toilet seat should be up no matter what, even for #2 ("bare bowling" it).
- “He comes out of the bathroom waving his hand... obviously, he just took a shit, comes back... the seat is up. I go back and I’m like, Carlos, why is the seat up if you just took a shit?... like, you’ve been bare bowling it this whole time.” (25:30–26:27)
Hilarity erupts as they ponder the logistics and mystery:
- “He holds the sides of the stall or the vanity.” – Ruth (27:12)
- “This is where Covid came from,” – Gareth (28:00)
Jake and Gareth brainstorm ridiculous ways to out other “bare bowlers” and rehash the shock that bathroom wisdom isn’t universal.

5. Caller Tim: Masturbation as Exam Prep

[34:25–36:32]

Tim from Nova Scotia recounts advice from his improv teacher turned lawyer: “If you really want to do this, you have to masturbate” before taking the LSAT.
- Jake: “I didn’t expect that from an improv teacher... Tim, this one is a real shock.” (35:19)
- Tim credits the advice: “I did as I was instructed, and I've been a practicing lawyer for almost 10 years.” (36:14)
Gareth closes out: “Keep practicing law and masturbating, my guy.” (36:18)

6. Caller Kelly: Never Trust Boys Without Socks

[36:46–42:33]

Kelly recalls mom’s ‘90s-era wisdom after a boy ruins her boombox:
- “Don’t trust boys that don’t wear socks. This was right around the Miami Vice era, and I live by that to this day.” (38:40)
Jake and Gareth discuss generational/fashion advice, laugh about “Miami Vice” style, and agree there’s something to it.
Emotional beat: Kelly’s mom died a year later, making the advice a treasured family legacy.

7. Caller Michaela: The Chicken-Napping Dog

[43:16–48:13]

Michaela from rural America describes moving into her first country home, only for her dog to bring her a live chicken (“missing half the feathers”) he’d clearly abducted.
Her father's advice: Calm down, go to the neighbor, apologize, and offer to pay. But if the flock is destroyed? “Blame the coyotes, eat the chicken, and sell the house.”
Michaela follows Dad’s advice, fesses up to the neighbors.
- Their response? “We have so many extra eggs. Would you like some?”
- Now, she gets free eggs five years running.

Memorable Quotes & Moments

On Steve Berg’s food improv:
“He’s going to just start... using tongs in a bowl and he’s going to go, ‘this spaghetti came out perfect. But I'm worried we're not going to have enough.’” – Gareth (04:05)
On late customers:
“If they're there past 9 o'clock, they're in the shithouse.” – Gareth (09:36)
On “bare bowling”:
"Like, you've been bare bowling it this whole time." – Ruth (26:27)
“This is where Covid came from.” – Gareth (28:00)
On Masturbation as advice:
“If you really want to do this, you have to masturbate.” – Tim’s improv-turned-lawyer mentor (35:19)
On boombox-boy trustworthiness:
“Don’t trust boys that don’t wear socks.” – Kelly’s Mom (38:40)
On chicken-dog diplomacy:
“If you see chickens lying everywhere and their entire flock has been massacred, you turn that four-wheeler around, have that chicken for supper, then put your house up for sale tomorrow morning....” – Michaela’s Dad (47:18)

Timestamps for Major Segments

01:44–05:31 — Format introduction, Steve Berg food improv stories
06:46–13:33 — Abby's shoe shop after-close strategy
14:10–21:36 — Brian’s “two minute game break” chore fix
24:44–34:11 — Ruth and the “bare bowling” cousin
34:25–36:32 — Tim’s LSAT masturbation advice
36:46–42:33 — Kelly's “no sock, no trust” rule
43:16–48:13 — Michaela’s dognapped chicken and egg neighbor story

Episode Takeaways & Tone

Atmosphere/Tone:
Conversational, irreverent, warmhearted, and filled with digressive riffs. The hosts mix sincere curiosity with comedic disbelief and affectionate teasing.
Overarching theme:
“Best advice” comes in many forms, sometimes utterly practical (“Don’t trust boys without socks”), sometimes bizarre (“Masturbate before exams”), but often memorable and worth passing on.
Listener Value:
The episode is a showcase for comical problem-solving, quirky wisdom, and the comfort of shared stories—perfect for fans and newcomers alike.

Final Thoughts

Jake and Gareth successfully experiment with listener-driven storytelling, mining the humor and oddity in real-life advice. Whether it’s outsmarting late-night shoppers or redefining family rules for bathroom basics, the episode highlights that if advice isn’t always perfect, at least it’s entertaining.

To share your “best advice,” email helpfulpod@gmail.com.

Want to watch video episodes? Visit patreon.com/heretohelppod