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- [00:00]
A
We're really excited to share that La Roche Posay is sponsoring this episode, and we're so excited to be continuing our partnership with them today.
- [00:07]
B
Well, hold on. Don't you mean La Roche Posay?
- [00:10]
A
La Roche Posay, if you didn't know, La Roche Posay is a French skincare brand that's recommended by dermatologists.
- [00:17]
B
Okay, her. So tell us a little bit more later on in the episode.
- [00:20]
A
Well, I'm gonna have to, because they're presenting this episode.
- [00:23]
B
Girl, this is an ad.
- [00:25]
A
Oh, weed trivia diva. Cause we're your girl. Hey.
- [00:35]
B
Cause I like how you do. Hey, girl.
- [00:39]
A
Welcome back to the couch.
- [00:40]
B
Happy Friday.
- [00:43]
A
Well, how was your week?
- [00:44]
B
It was good. It was good. I feel like we finished a long stretch.
- [00:49]
A
Yeah. And I do feel like. Like, you work for yourself. You own your own business, as do I. And I feel like a lot of the time, there is this feeling that the great news is your schedule's flexible. You make your own schedule.
- [01:03]
B
That's a blessing.
- [01:04]
A
But at the same time, I don't feel like I can take a day off. Like, I don't feel like I can ignore an email or a text because. Because, Because. Because, shockingly, I'm in charge.
- [01:15]
B
It's crazy. I was having that discussion with my mom yesterday and was like, who am I to blame if things don't get done? I said, I don't like Thaddeus.
- [01:24]
A
I hate that this is the only thing. And I. I. It is such a blessing to work for yourself. And I love. I'm so lucky. We are so lucky to do what we do. I love my job. But I would be remiss if I did not say, the generalized anxiety is off the charts.
- [01:39]
B
It's crazy. I went to Bruges. When was this? In October. I went to Bruges in October. I started Poise, was full time doing PR on my own in January. From January to October, I did not have a single day off. No breaks, no days off. Have been working every, like, nonstop from January to October. And I didn't realize up until I was leaving Bruges, and I was so rested and was so excited to return and get back to work. And I'm like, why was I so damn tired? Because I worked for 10 months straight.
- [02:07]
A
Yeah.
- [02:08]
B
Without a break.
- [02:08]
A
And you know what I wanted to say is we've been conditioned culturally. For me to commend you and say, look at that hustle.
- [02:14]
B
I was waiting for it.
- [02:15]
A
And I. You didn't compliment.
- [02:17]
B
I didn't yet.
- [02:18]
A
And I opened my mouth to Say man, but good for you. But that would go. That would be the antithesis of what I was just saying earlier, which you. You should. What I wanted to say, which was you should take time off.
- [02:28]
B
We should take breaks and you.
- [02:30]
A
And it's okay to take time off.
- [02:31]
B
Yep. I call it touch grass time. We use that phrase a lot now. Touching grass. But I mean that, like, sometimes it is essential to take off your shoes and touch grass.
- [02:39]
A
Take your cloak off, if you will.
- [02:41]
B
Take thine cloak off and touch grass.
- [02:42]
A
Put down.
- [02:44]
B
Put thine staff away.
- [02:46]
A
Put thine stuff. Okay. Or you shall catch. The plague will come to your household.
- [02:50]
B
And it sure will you not rest your bones. It sure will. So, yeah, work, be working. Work, be working.
- [02:57]
A
But yeah, no, I think it's important to be able to take time to yourself, which we talk so much about. And I think every. This is not a wellness podcast, I promise you that. But every wellness podcast I've ever heard, it's like they're all talking about the importance of rest and time off in self care. And I do feel like it's been so overstead that I start. My brain shuts off listening to anyone talk about self care because I'm like. A face mask is not going to help me.
- [03:20]
B
It's not gonna help me.
- [03:21]
A
However, what if it is? What if it is? Maybe what if that is why no one will shut up about it. Because frankly, it is what Americans need to hear. I feel like we don't because we have so glorified hustle culture, 1000%.
- [03:36]
B
There's a book called To Hell with Hustle. To Hell with the Hustle. Ooh, so good. I read it years ago and it has this. It's a red. If anyone can picture it, it's a red book and it has a coffee cup on it. I read it years ago, right before. Right before I moved to new. And the whole purpose of the book is to talk. It's to address hustle culture for what it is and give you actionable steps to break yourself out of it. Essentially, all these years later, five years later, six years later, do I follow those actionable steps? Absolutely not. Am I fully entrenched in hustle culture? Culture? Hate to say it, yes. But am I working on getting out of it big? Yes. I don't want to hustle. Like, who'd have thought? I mean, they tell you, you hear this when you become an entrepreneur, that the moment that you start to work for yourself, you work double. Right? You start to work more. I believed it, but didn't really believe it until I started to live it. And now I'm like, oh, my God, you're right. I won't get a break unless I force myself.
- [04:28]
A
Your best and cheapest employees. You. And she always says, right. Like, you are your best, most reliable and cheapest employee.
- [04:37]
B
Underpaid, overworked.
- [04:39]
A
Underpaid, overworked. What's it there? Where is that from?
- [04:43]
B
I actually really like the wine this week. This is good.
- [04:45]
A
This is great wine.
- [04:47]
B
This week.
- [04:47]
A
You're drinking a Pinot Grigio.
- [04:49]
B
No, it's a Sauvignon blanc.
- [04:52]
A
I don't know. I don't know about.
- [04:53]
B
As we always say.
- [04:54]
A
I don't know about.
- [04:56]
B
Where did that come from?
- [04:57]
A
You said it one night when we were standing in the kitchen. We were cleaning the kitchen, and our friend, who's very domestic. And she's very, very domestic, and we are not. She was very much born to be a wife. And she was. She made some kind of comment. Me and Tiffany were both trying to wash a cutting board, and she made some kind of comment like, what are you guys doing? That's not how you wash a cutting board. And she goes, what? You don't oil your cutting board and do all those things? And I went, girl, I've never even used a cutting board. I was just doing this to look busy. And then you went, I don't know shit about shit, so don't.
- [05:30]
B
I throw mine in the dishwasher. Slam that thing and turn it on. Keep it stepping when it gets pulled out. Cut that bitch to the cut.
- [05:41]
A
Anyway. Anyway. And it's funny because Lord knows. And we've talked about this before, I. There was a time when I was waitressing, walking dogs, going to. I was. While I was getting my. My bachelor's and my master's, working multiple jobs. And then I. And then I. You know, I worked as a receptionist, worked in a call center. I've worked so many jobs.
- [06:02]
B
Yeah.
- [06:03]
A
That I was underpaid, overworked. One time when I was a receptionist, it was such a. It was such a circus that we constantly had some people quitting all at once. There was one at one time, like, mass group quits. I worked eight days in a row, and the person who kept making the schedule just didn't realize that they hadn't given me a day off. And my fool of a toque. I was such a fool that I was too scared to tell anybody that I hadn't had a day off. And I just assumed it was by design that I didn't get a Day off. And finally somebody was like, oh, you haven't had a day off? And I was like, yes, I'd like one. And that was so weird. Like, why was I. But I was so frightened, I. Corporate culture really thrives on you being frightened and thinking you need it, when in reality, they need you to survive, to go for the cars.
- [06:50]
B
Don't work without the cogs.
- [06:52]
A
We have got to organize.
- [06:54]
B
We're staging a revolt. It is what it is.
- [06:55]
A
I think that's what unions are, actually.
- [06:57]
B
Ah, that's true.
- [06:58]
A
Cheers to unions.
- [06:59]
B
Cheers to unions.
- [07:00]
A
Yay. Organize your people. And that's not a song that. I made that up right now.
- [07:07]
B
The official union chant. That's crazy.
- [07:11]
A
Bam.
- [07:11]
B
I couldn't agree with you more. Wait, what did you say?
- [07:14]
A
Band together. Get your pto. Everybody's got to. Don't channel. Oh, my God. If there is somebody listening to this who's, like, in charge of your union, call me up. I can. I can. I can write you guys a jingle.
- [07:29]
B
She's got you on lock. But no, you hit something on the nail there, or you hit the kneel. On the head, as they say.
- [07:35]
A
On the head. Yeah. No, it's really, really interesting.
- [07:37]
B
Corporate culture definitely thrives on. It's like reverse FOMO almost. No, it is kind of fomo. It's FOMO when you think about it, like, you want to be involved in it, you want to be a part of it. Like our early conversations when I would tell you how stressed I was being a corporate employee, and you'd be like, damn it all to hell. It still must be really cool, though. And I'm like, I guess.
- [07:55]
A
No, I. I really. You. So there was a time when Tiffany, when you were working, we were both working in corporate America, and I had deemed your job just much cooler than mine. You were working in fashion, so it was just much cooler. But as anyone listening knows, fashion is in New York City is so cutthroat. It's so difficult.
- [08:12]
B
I have to say. The Devil Wears Prada is not a lie. They tried to warn us. They tried to warn me.
- [08:17]
A
And I watched the Devil Wears Prada every week. And the whole point. Ironically, the whole point of the Devil Wears Prada growing up, I watched it hundreds and hundreds of times. The whole point of the Devil Wears Prada, right, is that Andy, at the end, chooses her dreams, a better life to not be, you know, misused, right?
- [08:30]
B
She.
- [08:31]
A
She walks away from every When. When Meryl Streep goes, don't be crazy. Everyone wants this. Oh, please, Andrea. Everybody wants this. And Andy is like, I don't want this. You know, I. I choose me. When I was watching that at 16, I was like, fool, get in there. And she's in Paris. I was like, there's still time to turn back.
- [08:52]
B
Get in there.
- [08:52]
A
Meryl needs you.
- [08:54]
B
Crazy. At 23, watching that in, like, elbow deep in the trenches of being a true New York City fashion girl, in theory, living the dream life, doing everything that I thought I wanted to do. And I could not imagine pulling in Andy, like, being strong enough to say, you know what? No, I don't want this. To my.
- [09:09]
A
You have the job. Many girls want the job. A thousand girls wanted.
- [09:12]
B
Truly. Truly. And I wonder now, I'm thinking back, like, what did it actually take for me to say no? And it really was the call of entrepreneurship. Nothing would have pulled me out of there except being my own boss and really hating reporting to people. That's really what it took. But it wasn't the money. It wasn't the abuse. It wasn't the lack of, like, respect or camaraderie from the coworkers. It wasn't lack of promotion. None of that. All of that would have been workable and acceptable, which is crazy.
- [09:41]
A
I. I feel this way before, but when my manager first discovered me, I'd had a viral video, but I didn't really know how social media worked. My first video I had ever really made on TikTok went viral, right? I woke up one morning, I had 21 million views, and I didn't even have a profile picture on TikTok.
- [09:56]
B
That is crazy.
- [09:57]
A
People thought I had a bot account, which is understandable. Tarantino 2021, with my account name. I had two videos, and the second one had 21 million views. It's crazy. And I didn't even. I had no idea what I was doing. And anyway, so my manager, Shoshana had seen the video. She asked me out to coffee, and I had all these people in my inbox that were totally overwhelming me. So she was, like, the one human, like, ooh. I'm not gonna say there was some really large organizations, like, looking to agencies looking to represent me, and all just.
- [10:24]
B
From the first vid. Crazy.
- [10:26]
A
And I did not know what to make of this. And I was so scared of being scammed. I kept thinking about Prince, and I was like, I don't want to sign a bad contract and be in go to red carpets and chains. Anyway, I love Prince. And so, right? And I. At the time, it was. I was working at that job that I just said, There was a point where I worked eight days in a row, right? Crazy. I had a lot of people working at that job that were not nice to me, and I just really accepted it. I don't know why. I have stories of corporate America that would shock you. That would shock you. That would cuddle your blood, curl your toes. But the thing is, is while we're all responsible for our own actions, I do think that a lot of the time people are under so much pressure like that. That is. That is brought upon by corporate America. That's what that thrives on. To keep you cog in the wheel. It doesn't have to be that way. And I think there are plenty of companies out there that do not do that to their employees. There are just some that do. I think people end up saying and doing things and being part of a culture that is toxic. And they don't even know how to stop doing it or how to stop being part of it, because it's far more insidious. It's systemic. It's like the way the company works. I think highly competitive environments can become really toxic. Sales environments can become really right. I've heard so many stories of people that are like. Like, I had to. I was working at this job. I had horrible insomnia. All right, I gotta pause. Lay down.
- [11:52]
B
Hi, buddy.
- [11:52]
A
Hi, everyone. This is my dog, and he's been really upset that we got to give.
- [11:57]
B
Me my beard back.
- [11:59]
A
Do not grab the beard. What was I saying?
- [12:02]
B
Corporate America is far more insidious than just.
- [12:05]
A
Than just like, one manager. Like, so one. One mean manager is a symptom, usually in my experience, of a far greater cancer. It's a culture that's allowing that manager to be mean.
- [12:18]
B
Oh, it's 100% true. I've been in situations where we've been able to get rid of the problem manager. And you would think that this situation would end.
- [12:27]
A
And then, shockingly, things aren't cured overnight.
- [12:29]
B
It's crazy. Things aren't cured in a year. Things aren't cured in two years. It is.
- [12:33]
A
Exactly.
- [12:33]
B
It's interesting. Also, there's something to be said about the fact that now companies are far more aware of the fact that workplace culture is what keeps their employees. So they go out of their way to make things positive.
- [12:44]
A
I'd like to think. Think that it's getting better.
- [12:46]
B
But even still.
- [12:47]
A
But even still. So the point is of the story, the way that how powerful of a tool fear is what I say. What I would say is, Shoshana, a manager took Me out to coffee. And she said, I really think that you could have a career in this. I think you should do it. I think you're funny, and I think you're a good writer. And I'm sitting there like, I know I've been quite. I've been known to be quite the shilly goat in my day, but I was like, I can't imagine actually making a career out of this. That's crazy. Bigfoot, out. All right, I've got to continue this story. There was a weird cut, guys, because the dog got up, and we had to readjust. But now he's on the floor. All's well. So she said, well, what do I have to. What do we have to do to make you comfortable to quit your job? And at the time, I was up for a promotion, ironically, that they had dangled in front of me like a carrot for months. They weren't gonna give me that. They were not gonna give me that promotion.
- [13:43]
B
You don't think so?
- [13:44]
A
No, I don't. I think I had. I was like, I want to quit. And they. They offered. They were like, there's this job that's gonna open up, and we're gonna give it to you. And they just kept dangling it in front of me, and it was, oh, my God. A $4 raise, which, frankly, is quite a bit. If you're going from. I was going to go from $17 an hour to, like, 24.
- [14:00]
B
That's significant.
- [14:01]
A
That was significant. But for what? The way that I was feeling. I had insomnia for this entire. The two years I worked here in. My personal life was just in tatters because I was so unhappy and so worried about my job all the time. Piss on the pot or get off. Bruce, you got to go.
- [14:18]
B
He's like, I don't speak English.
- [14:19]
A
Can you just see his butt in the camera?
- [14:21]
B
Yes.
- [14:23]
A
We're just gonna keep talking. And there's a great day in the studio. It's fine. Which is also my house. I'm just gonna keep talking.
- [14:29]
B
Accurate.
- [14:29]
A
So anyways, ignore it. Enjoying the dog butt. Oh, hi. How are you?
- [14:33]
B
Come back, come back.
- [14:34]
A
Do you have some thoughts about corporate America? Welcome.
- [14:38]
B
I've worked a job.
- [14:41]
A
How's your work experience been? Oh, I know. You've never worked a day in your life.
- [14:46]
B
Perfect.
- [14:47]
A
You live for free. You eat for free, all thanks to me, your God, your warden. So she was like, what have you to do? Quit your job? And I was like, I won't do it. I just thought what she was saying was so crazy.
- [15:01]
B
Yeah.
- [15:01]
A
And what ended up being really ironic is I ended up saying no to who would now go into my manager. But I said no to her, I wouldn't sign the contract, and I was just too scared to take the leap. And I went home and it was my husband, my now husband, who was like, t, you got to quit your job. You've got to do this. He's like, you're not going to get a chance like this again. He said, you're talented, you're funny, just try it. And then he said, and this was the most important thing. Honestly, T, you are so unhappy at that job anyways. Anything would be better. Even if this doesn't work out, even if you fail, at least you would be free from this environment that has made you so unhappy.
- [15:37]
B
That's true.
- [15:38]
A
And to even him, I was like, no, I've got to stay. The next day I went to work. Something crazy happened. Someone yelled at me. I went on my lunch break. I cried sitting at the fountain in front of the Plaza Hotel.
- [15:49]
B
I've had a cry there too.
- [15:50]
A
It's such a good place to cry.
- [15:52]
B
My first cry in the city.
- [15:53]
A
And I was like, what am I doing? What am I doing? What am I doing? All for what? For what?
- [15:58]
B
For.
- [15:59]
A
For the people that don't love me. Why am I like, this is crazy. So I ended up, I went inside, I quit my job. I didn't even put in two weeks. I was like, I have. This is your 24 hour notice. I've got to go.
- [16:07]
B
I did the same thing.
- [16:09]
A
My bad. And anyways, my bad. I'm sorry. That was in bad taste.
- [16:14]
B
Gotta go.
- [16:14]
A
I'm sorry about that. It's nice to give her two weeks if you can.
- [16:19]
B
If you can, keyword.
- [16:20]
A
But anyways, I bounced. I bounced. I became a content creator. It all worked out. And also I had the privilege of a second income, right? I was living with my now husband. So there's a lot of things to. I'm not just saying quit your job. It's making you unhappy. If you don't have savings, you don't have a backup plan. Maybe don't do that. But if you aren't happy at your job, if you feel stuck, start putting together your exit strategy, please. Life is too short, babe.
- [16:48]
B
Heavy on the strategy. Do not recommend just up and leaving your job without some kind of something.
- [16:53]
A
But if you're really unhappy, this isn't the sign for me to say, do something crazy. Say something crazy. I'm wearing these underwear. Quit your job tomorrow if you're unhappy. Then start creating your exit strategy. Now, what are you gonna do about it? Build the exit strategy. Now do what you have to do to get to a place where you can transition to a different job or a different space where you can pay your bills, but you will be safer and happier and treated well. Because if you spend. We spend so much time at our jobs. We spend so much time with our co workers, oftentimes far more than we do with our family and friends.
- [17:28]
B
Yeah.
- [17:29]
A
So you have got to, at the bare minimum, feel okay when you clock out at the end of the day about what you're doing and how you're spending your time. My only regret in this life is that I wasted time at a job where I was so deeply and truly unhappy. I'm sad that I did that.
- [17:45]
B
Yeah, that's tough.
- [17:46]
A
But I'm glad that I had that lesson that I can share with you.
- [17:48]
B
Now in that it all worked out, too.
- [17:51]
A
It all worked out in the end.
- [17:52]
B
Yeah.
- [17:53]
A
It always works out in the end, my friend.
- [17:54]
B
It always does. It always does. And now a word from our sponsors. Ah. I just realized I haven't reapplied my.
- [18:04]
A
Sunscreen every two hours. Diva.
- [18:06]
B
But guess which one from La Roche Posay I'm currently using.
- [18:10]
A
Is it the same one I'm thinking about?
- [18:11]
B
You know it. This is the Anthelios tinted mineral sunscreen. 100% mineral protection.
- [18:17]
A
It's out now in three new flexible shades, which is great since I go from brown in the summer to diet brown in the winter. I hate my pale season, but at least it's a sunscreen shade for my skin tone.
- [18:27]
B
I love using this one because it's great for my skin. It feels great and is very blendable. I love all things La Roche Posay because she really is that girl. And bonus, she's great for the sensitive skin. Girlies.
- [18:38]
A
Absolutely. I'm one of those. Anyway, head straight to La Roche Posay us to get your Anthelios tinted mineral sunscreen and shop all things La Roche Posay.
- [18:47]
B
Scott, bottom it up.
- [18:49]
A
And now back to the show.
- [18:50]
B
Yeah, the. The exit strategy thing is very much important. I remember I used to be. Well, I mean, I was definitely a job quitter. Like, I would up and dip on the place real quick. I'm like, can't do it. Is one thing for me is that I do not like being disrespected. And so I would never. I was not someone who was able to tough out being disrespected on a job in school with teachers ever. So that made for really difficult work environments prior to becoming, like an actual corporate employee and being promoted and having titles, et cetera. And then when I got in the position of being someone who was somebody in the workplace, it was very difficult for me to sit and tough it out and like, maintain status quo when all I wanted to do was just rail on people constantly, not saying, I'm, like, crazy or emotionally distraught or anything like that.
- [19:39]
A
You were kind of getting gaslit or pushed to a place where you were frustrated.
- [19:43]
B
Add into the mix being a black woman in the workplace. On top of that, a young black woman. I usually was the youngest person on all of my teams, but from our experience, as you know, I always was able to find myself in positions of esteem and prestige at a very young age with very little experience, if we're going to be honest. But I was charming, charismatic, and get the job. But once you got into that position, it was very difficult to then be happy because you're constantly feeling like you're being threatened, or at least I felt like I was being threatened.
- [20:10]
A
Well, yeah, you didn't. You didn't feel like you could be. You could actually do your job because you were constantly like, if you're in a space in which if you make a mistake, you're like, oh, I'm so expendable. I'm so unimportant that. That they'll just fire me. Yeah, I would rather like, now that I have a business, I would never want somebody working for me to feel that way. Now, I hope you don't make a million mistakes, but if you make a mistake, that's all right. Well, you're human.
- [20:34]
B
Yeah.
- [20:35]
A
I think when you erase, the erasure of the ability to make a mistake is also in the same extent the erasure of the ability to be creative, to ask questions 1000% right. All those things are the. That's the antithesis of a mistake. Being able to make a mistake or fail or say the wrong thing also leaves space for you to.
- [20:59]
B
To grow.
- [20:59]
A
To grow. Oh, my God.
- [21:00]
B
You can't grow if you're not learning and making mistakes. Try. Bye, diva. So that was super. That was integral to my. To my growing. Making mistakes was integral to my growing as an. As an employee. So when it came time for me to buck up or shut up, as they say, and I had the option to create an exit strategy or continue to work at the. Or work in the career that I knew I didn't like, that wasn't really serving me, really created with people like me in mind. Or that when we did make it into the space, people like me, we didn't really have a voice and we couldn't speak up. When it was time for me to create that exit strategy, it was very difficult because I couldn't. I couldn't see success on the other side of it because I didn't have an example of what success looked like. So it was really terrifying. And I guess I'm seguing us into, like, this conversation of entrepreneurship. And, like, what did that look like for you? And you were taking that leap for me, it looked like not talking to anybody about it. I told my immediate circle that I wanted to start an agency, and then I stopped talking about it. I was like, well, we're just going to do it. I went out and got clients, and it all happened, what, August, September, October, November, December, January. Five months. It happened in five months. It was five months between me deciding I wanted to start Poise, which is my public relations agency, talking to mentors about it, generating a client base.
- [22:15]
A
Yeah.
- [22:16]
B
Taking on the first client, starting the actual llc, all of that. And then putting in my two weeks, which ended up not being a two weeks, because I was like, why am I waiting, Continuing to give these people down when I can.
- [22:26]
A
What was the hardest part about quitting your corporate job? To go work for yourself?
- [22:30]
B
Knowing that I had spent and put in so much time to climb that ladder and that I was basically starting from scratch again. But we talked about it earlier, like, the. The appeal of climbing and growing one, and then the fear that you can't leave it to, like, it was debilitating. I really was out here like, oh, shit. I really did this thing. Like, what am I going to do? What's next? But then now I'm looking back on that 10, 11 months into the business, and I'm like, oh, my God, if everyone could see how great this is. If everyone can feel how good it is to not feel absolutely terrified all the time that you know you're gonna. One fuck up is gonna ruin the rest of your career that, you know, the tour is over.
- [23:09]
A
This is gonna ruin the tour.
- [23:10]
B
This is gonna ruin the tour.
- [23:11]
A
Ruin the tour.
- [23:12]
B
If you mess up once or something like that. Like, I would say the biggest freedom that comes with entrepreneurship is knowing that I can mess up, and that's okay, because Lord knows, am I still learning and growing?
- [23:21]
A
And I want to speak to this because there might be someone listening who did do that, who did quit their job, corporate job, who did go and pursue their dream, who opened their business etc. And eventually found themselves going back into the stability of a corporate job, or, you know, just like that. You know, the constant paycheck. Yeah, whatever that is. Just going and going back. Going back.
- [23:40]
B
Yeah.
- [23:40]
A
But the thing is, it's never a step backwards. It's just part of the journey. I think what we're saying is being in a corporate job, having your own business, it's all forward moving. So long as you keep moving. I think the point is, if you are staying somewhere because you're afraid, nothing good ever came from a decision made out of fear. That's true. But when you make decisions out of faith, when you make faith in yourself, faith in that it's gonna work out. When you make decisions from a place of love, you love yourself. You love your journey. You have loved having your own business, but it's just not feasible. And you need to go back to corporate America. But because you love yourself, like you, you know, right. You're. You're doing, making because this was best for you, that's still a beautiful thing. I think what we're trying to say is, what I want to say, what I want you to know is what you do is what you do. What you do is not who you are.
- [24:36]
B
Amen.
- [24:36]
A
What you do is what you do.
- [24:38]
B
That was a big lesson to learn.
- [24:39]
A
When you. If and when you leave a corporate job, it will still be on your resume. It will still have been there. You're not starting over from scratch. You might make a leap to work for yourself or to work for a different company. You know, work in a different position. You're gonna learn stuff, you're gonna grow, you're gonna change, you're gonna try new things. And then you might go back. You can always go back and take a similar position at a similar company at a later time. Right? But you still. That is still forward moving. That is not backwards. I think the point is to just never stay anywhere or in any place in which you feel stuck or frightened because you have no other options because there's no rules. I have great news. Great news. There's no rules, babe. There's no rules on this earth. We have a finite amount of time here, and if there are rules, they're.
- [25:27]
B
Very much made up by people who were guessing also.
- [25:30]
A
So make the best possible choices to protect yourself and the people that you love and whatever that looks like to you. The great news is there is no wrong answer. As long as it is your choice. There is no wrong choice.
- [25:41]
B
And life is long. You are so allowed to Try new things. Go, try again. See how it works. It may fit in this season, and that's great. It may not fit in the next season, and that's also great. But give yourself the ability to test it out and see.
- [25:54]
A
I did a piece for the Jimmy Fallon show, and one of my makeup artists was a school teacher, and I had this, and I was like, wow, that's so cool. How'd you go into makeup artistry? And she was like, I just want to try it. And I thought that was so cool. And I hope I'm remembering the story right. And forgive me if you're watching this and you're like, that's not what I said. But I just remember her saying that she had had a really different career, a really different job, and now she's a makeup artist.
- [26:18]
B
I love stories.
- [26:19]
A
And when I had asked her, like, oh, so is this the dream? She'd kind of been like, I don't know. Who knows what I'll do next, period? And I. That is what a way to live it is. Good for you.
- [26:28]
B
I love.
- [26:29]
A
There's no fear there. She got to try it all. The librarian at my high school, and I was grand. I remember she had told me, and I don't remember what she. But she had all this array of jobs, and her retirement, she decided to go and become a librarian. I remember asking her, out of all the cool, interesting jobs you'd have, because there were so many, why librarian? And she goes, well, I just wanted to try it. I'd always wanted to be one.
- [26:48]
B
Why not?
- [26:49]
A
And I remember thinking, wow, that. What a cool way to grow up. And I want to do that when I grow up.
- [26:53]
B
Yeah.
- [26:53]
A
I want just. I want to try things, and I want to. I want to experience things. I want to dare. I want to dare to try things that interest me and excite me, because that's the whole reason we're here.
- [27:05]
B
Well, I would say you are already doing that.
- [27:08]
A
Here I am dressed as a wizard with a glass of wine on my couch, and who knows what I'll be doing 10 years from now? Perhaps my beard will be bigger.
- [27:19]
B
We can only.
- [27:20]
A
We can only.
- [27:23]
B
Amen. What is your favorite thing about working for yourself?
- [27:27]
A
Oh, getting to hire people I really, really like. Oh, I love hiring people that I really like, that I want to see their dreams come true, that I get to be invested in their lives and like what they want, and I get to be part of that.
- [27:41]
B
Yeah.
- [27:42]
A
My producer has her hands in the air, because my producers are the ones that I hired because I was like, I like you and I think you're smart. And I. Our values align. That's exciting for me because I really, I'm really a relationship driven person. And so how, when you don't work for yourself, part of it is you have got to work with whoever's in front of you. And that's a beautiful skill to have and you should have it. But I love, I love when I meet somebody I can choose to be like, I want to invest in you and I want to invest in this relationship that's really fun for me.
- [28:12]
B
Yeah.
- [28:12]
A
And I really like that very much.
- [28:15]
B
I like that very much.
- [28:17]
A
I like that very much. You. I get to work with you. My best friend.
- [28:20]
B
That's true.
- [28:20]
A
And that's so fun. I was like, I like you a lot. Let's have a show. Hope this works out. Hopefully the show.
- [28:28]
B
Stream it, watch it. How would I answer it? My favorite thing about working for myself, I like client research. I love finding new brands to work with. As a publicist, I feel like the basis of enjoying your job is wholly dependent upon the people that you work with. If you like your clients, then you'll love what you do. If you don't like your clients, then it's significantly challenging. So I love discovering new brands. The basis of poise is to work with brands and people who don't have representation in their marketplace and who want to be represented more freely in their marketplace. So it is a lot of fun for me to explore beauty brands and lingerie brands and heritage legacy brands that want to be remarketed and all of that. That's. That lights me up inside. I love a rebrand. I do. I should have known that I'd be a publicist because I've always enjoyed something like that or things like that. So, yeah, I love working with small businesses and people who want to change their. Their branding and messaging and appeal to audiences all over the world. It's fun.
- [29:30]
A
It's cool. All right, so not counting the jobs you have now, because our jobs are very fun now, the job I do now is my favorite job I've ever had. Ditto before in the before times. What was your favorite job you've had coming up? Mine was being a dark wizard. I love being a dark wizard. Just kidding.
- [29:49]
B
My favorite. My favorite. Oh, my God. Duh. Real estate. I love you worked in real estate. I did, and I loved it. So when I graduated, I'll tell the story. When I graduated high school, we couldn't afford to send me to college. And so all of my friends went off to school. I was supposed to be a theater major. I wanted to go to theater school or school for theater. And as we all know, an arts education is very expensive, so it was absolutely just not an option at the time. So I moved in with my grandparents and started working at a local home builder in a town called Viera, Florida. Shout out to all my peoples in Viera, thank you all so much for everything that you did for me. I genuinely can't repay you or thank you enough for starting me on my way as an adult. So we moved to Viera, and there's one home builder in the town of Viera, and they build all of the houses in the city. And it's very much like, kind of like how Dallas is set up. A bunch of. What do they call them, Master plan communities. Very cute little cookie cutter communities all around. It's so sweet. But this builder had the monopoly on the land in all of the places, and so they needed employees. So my mom actually applied for the job first. And they're like, you're overqualified. And my mom's like, well, I got a daughter who's not. So I interviewed the next day and got the job. And I was the executive assistant to four of the. They were realtors for the realtors who were selling the land and the homes in this one particular community. And they brought me in with. I mean, I had no experience in real estate, but my mom was a realtor growing up, so I knew a lot about the market and the lingo and how to show a home. And I was talkative and charismatic, and I just. I loved working, working with the customer. So I was out there selling houses at 18, 19 years old, like, driving a golf cart around this community, helping sign contracts, like, just living my absolute dream, making so much money. And the crazy thing is, when it came time to move to New York, it was so weird, because I was making more money than I ever had. I was young, I had mentorship, I had a community. I loved, loved, loved working at this place. And with all of that, I still was like, I gotta move to New York City. I know that my life will truly begin when I live there. I know that there's something there that I'm not quite getting here, Even though I love it here, but I have to be there. And so I went to my bosses, who are now my mentor today, went to my bosses and was like, hey, y'all, I want to move to New York. And they all supported me. They gave me money to Move. Like, they were really, really beautiful people. I missed them so much. And I told them I wanted to move. And they said, well, you have two options. You can stay and you can make six figures at 19 years old. And I said, that's very attractive. Or they said, you can go and you can follow your dreams. And they all looked at me and were like, we didn't do option two when we were your age, and that's why we're here. And I'm like, but you're. You have families and you have money and all this. And they're like, no. Yes. All of that is great, and we love that. But if we had the opportunity to do what's presented before you now, we would take it hands down. So we're not going to sway your decision, but let that inform. You know, think about it as you're.
- [32:45]
A
Going and how interesting that their. Their dreams. They have. They. They have. They have beautiful and great lives completely fulfilled. And the. Basically, what they're kind of saying is, you'll have a great life either way.
- [32:57]
B
Exactly.
- [32:57]
A
There is a path in which you follow. You dare to dream.
- [33:00]
B
Correct.
- [33:01]
A
And the path in which it's, you know, stable.
- [33:03]
B
Yeah.
- [33:03]
A
And there's no wrong choice.
- [33:04]
B
Yep.
- [33:05]
A
But of course, as your. As your. Your friends, we want you to dare to dream and try.
- [33:10]
B
Exactly. So that was.
- [33:11]
A
I'm so glad you did.
- [33:12]
B
That was their prompting. And so in six months, I saved up all my coin with my real estate career on my back and was like, well, guess we're starting over. And there we go and moved to New York to work in fashion. And it all ended up working out. But that was my absolute favorite job. I love being a sweet little realtor girl. It was so cute. I probably would still do it again if I had the chance in the city. We'll see. Who knows? Poise PR or. No, not Poise pr. Would it be Poise Real Estate LLC or something? I don't know. We'll think about it. Point being, that was it. I loved it. What about you?
- [33:44]
A
I love being a waitress. I was a terrible waitress, but I still loved her.
- [33:49]
B
Dang, when you do that, I can't even do it. My mouth doesn't move like that.
- [33:53]
A
I was the worst waitress.
- [33:55]
B
Why were you the worst waitress?
- [33:56]
A
Because I never knew what was going on. I'd never even seen the menu before. I always. I just ordered buffalo chicken wings every single break.
- [34:05]
B
Delicious.
- [34:06]
A
I. I couldn't remember orders. I don't. I don't drink beer. And I worked in a beer. I Worked at a beer hall as a tavernous. As a tavern. Winch. Loved it. Had my breast pushed up to my chin. I used to literally get into such conversation with clients that I'd sit at their tables with them and be like, tell me all about the breakup, girl. And my boss would come out, who's Irish, and be like, tarons at table. Church or tree? Just. Just shooting the. And I got 19 customers waiting on their stuff. All the orders are wrong. And I'd be like, that's absolutely right. But are they happy? Maybe not. Or are they my friends? Yes.
- [34:45]
B
Yes.
- [34:46]
A
And I love my.
- [34:47]
B
Good. I'm sure.
- [34:48]
A
I love my clients. And I love. I mean, I love being a waitress. I love being waitress. It's my favorite job I've ever had.
- [34:53]
B
For one night and one night only, you return to the. The floor.
- [34:57]
A
Hell, yeah, I would. I would love that. I would actually totally do that.
- [35:01]
B
Yeah, I would. Hell, I. I mean, we said this before. You could be on the floor. I'd be burlesque dancing on the bar. And.
- [35:07]
A
Hang on. I want to be on the bar too.
- [35:09]
B
Oh, so you'd be on the bar with. And then in between sets, I'd be.
- [35:14]
A
Like, hang on, out of breath. All right, so you guys wanted the. Hold on. You guys wanted the truffle fries with the. You guys want it? Sorry. Lady Marmalade really took it out of me. You had an Allagash white. You didn't have that. Oh, okay. Oh, all right. Did I called you guys. You guys look awfully young.
- [35:35]
B
Okay, back to the States.
- [35:38]
A
Hold on a minute. Dun, dun, dun, dun. A runathon. I gotta go. Dun, dun, dun. Tiffany, you're already doing the choreography. Waiting for a dun. It's your man. I'm like, oh, crap.
- [35:51]
B
For the worst realist dances. I haven't even taken 10 to run it.
- [35:56]
A
I haven't taken my 10 yet. And mambo number five's on call the Better Business Bureau.
- [36:03]
B
That's crazy. Oh, my God. I hope we get the chance.
- [36:07]
A
I was a bouncer for three days.
- [36:08]
B
Once you told me this, and I almost collapsed to my knees. Why would anybody make you a bouncer? You're five.
- [36:15]
A
Five?
- [36:16]
B
Who were you bouncing?
- [36:17]
A
Imagine you're trying to sneak in to a bar you got kicked out of last week, and you see this face. Slow down, bucko. You're not going anywhere. They call me Muscle T. I have the bones the size of a colonial factory worker.
- [36:34]
B
You get thrown to the side, like, bodily move.
- [36:39]
A
Stop in the name of love.
- [36:40]
B
I'm screaming, wait have you ever seen that episode of spongebob where he's fighting with Bubble Bass about the pickles under his teeth?
- [36:46]
A
Yes.
- [36:47]
B
And Bubble Bass walks into the Krusty Krab and slings a man to the side. You're the man that he swings to the side. Exactly.
- [36:54]
A
That was actually crazy that I did that.
- [36:57]
B
Insane. I can't even ask where it was.
- [36:59]
A
Please don't ask me where it was.
- [37:00]
B
You'll tell me, because they're going to.
- [37:02]
A
Come back and be like, well, we didn't even ask Taryn to be a bouncer that night. She just stood outside the door and was trying to.
- [37:09]
B
Yeah, that's all right.
- [37:10]
A
I like the flashlight, though. I kept in everybody's eyes.
- [37:14]
B
It's like the world's worst movie theater.
- [37:16]
A
They were saying, charge of Paris. What's that? I don't remember. Vape out in the bar. It's a fire hazard. Whoa, whoa, whoa. The fire marshals. Come here. Let them through. Let them through. Ladies and gents, it was not the fire marshal. It was just some guy with a beard.
- [37:30]
B
That's so funny.
- [37:31]
A
You're telling me you're not the fire marshal?
- [37:33]
B
I can't.
- [37:34]
A
You know, impersonating a fire marshal as a crime in state of New York.
- [37:37]
B
The person didn't say a damn thing about being the fire marshal.
- [37:39]
A
I'm not a fire marshal, man. I'm a regular.
- [37:41]
B
You just assume.
- [37:44]
A
Let me catch you in here. Okay, See you next week. All right. Anyway.
- [37:50]
B
That's funny. So what is the question of the week?
- [37:54]
A
Let me hit it with. Let me hit him with it. All right. Feel them. What's stopping you from doing what you love? And if you are doing what you love, what steps did you take to take the leap? What was your exit strategy? You know, what was your launching pad strategy?
- [38:10]
B
How long did it take?
- [38:12]
A
Yeah. Share it to people that can hear.
- [38:14]
B
We want to celebrate you.
- [38:16]
A
We want to celebrate you, and we want. I really want you to do what you love. I think everybody deserves in this life. I think everyone deserves to do something that they like to do day in and day out.
- [38:26]
B
What a blessing, a privilege it is to do something that you like to do day after day after day.
- [38:31]
A
I know.
- [38:31]
B
Very much understated, but God isn't important. So, yeah, we want to know. We want to know.
- [38:36]
A
I don't care. Are you an alligator farmer? I love that. I love that. You know, my favorite thing, when I was Miss New York and I was on tour, one thing I did a lot was I met a lot of Historians who did a lot of walking tours. Right? I went on a ghost tour of the Capitol. A man I know, a man named Stuart, I believe, gave me the best tour of my life. And he was even dressed in like colonial dress. And he gave me a tour of the Capitol. And you know why I love Stuart so much? This is a man that loved what he did. I'm certain he's no millionaire, but I know that he loved what he did and it showed through. And I love that too. I loved every minute of it.
- [39:13]
B
But I still talk about it today.
- [39:14]
A
I talk about it all the time. And one thing I loved about being Ms. New York is I met a ton of historians because I was always getting historical tours of communities and towns. And these are my favorite people. You know why? Because they are all people that love what they do. They made choices in their life to get to a place in which they got to do something every day that they love, which is talk about history. And I just love that. I think the world goes. Goes around. The world is made better every single day by people that are putting out into the world the thing that they really feel called to put out there. And it doesn't matter what it is.
- [39:46]
B
It does not matter.
- [39:47]
A
Maybe you want to make ice cream cones.
- [39:49]
B
Do that.
- [39:50]
A
We need it. Maybe you want to make synthetic beards. I certainly.
- [39:53]
B
Or wrangle the penguins at the zoo or something.
- [39:55]
A
So anyway, put my beard back on for the close out. Well, I love you.
- [40:01]
B
Have a good week. Guys.
- [40:03]
A
Beard down. I'm at glasses, as always. It gets to the end of the episode and I need more wine. The dog theory. Did you have a good episode?
- [40:12]
B
Big bony boy.
- [40:13]
A
What's your favorite job you've ever had? Peeing on trees.
- [40:16]
B
This.
- [40:17]
A
Chasing squirrels. Yeah, he's never caught a single squirrel. Don't tell him I said that.
- [40:22]
B
He's manager.
- [40:23]
A
Just letting you know.
- [40:23]
B
Factory. That's his favorite job.
- [40:25]
A
It's embarrassing for him.
- [40:26]
B
Until next time, guys.
- [40:28]
A
We love you very much. Hope you have a good week.
- [40:31]
B
I hope your glass is just as empty as ours.
- [40:33]
A
Absolutely. Have a good night. And remember, we're your girls. Cause we're your girls. Hey.
- [40:46]
B
Cause I like how you do Wear.
- [40:48]
A
Youe Girls is hosted and executive produced by Taryn Delaney Smith and Tiffany Sinkhole Hilton Management by Social Media. Produced by Good Mess Media. Follow us on all platforms at Warrior girlspod.
- [40:59]
B
Before we close out, you know we gotta thank our partner, LaRouche Posay again for always vibing with your girls. Don't forget that SPF and visit LaRoche. Posay us.