Money Money Money (MONNAAYY!)

Summary

Podcast Summary: We're Your Girls - "Money Money Money (MONNAAYY!)"

Podcast Information:

• Title: We're Your Girls
• Host/Author: Good Mess Media
• Episode: Money Money Money (MONNAAYY!)
• Release Date: February 28, 2025
• Description: Two best friends, one mic (okay, maybe two), and endless laughter! 🎙️😂 Tune in every Friday night for the ultimate dose of real talk, hilarious shenanigans, and heartwarming sisterhood. We’re diving into life, love, and all the messy, magical moments in between—because finding your ride-or-die crew is what it’s all about. Grab your favorite drink, hit play on We're Your Girls, and let’s talk, laugh, and connect.

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1. Introduction to the Episode

The episode titled "Money Money Money (MONNAAYY!)" kicks off with a playful banter between the hosts, Taryn (A) and Tiffany (B). They humorously introduce their sponsor, La Roche Posay, before diving into the core topic: money. The lighthearted start sets the tone for an engaging and honest conversation about their personal relationships with money.

2. Personal Experiences and Upbringing

Taryn and Tiffany share their early experiences with money, highlighting how their upbringing shaped their current financial behaviors.

• Taryn's Experience:

  • [02:11] "Toggled back and forth between being very financially stable and then also going through some intense scarcity."
  • Taryn discusses her middle-class upbringing where financial instability was common, leading to anxiety and a cautious approach to money.

• Tiffany's Perspective:

  • [10:42] "I was always exposed to extreme wealth and didn't really know. Like, it didn't ring as weird to me because I always saw it."
  • Tiffany grew up in South Florida, witnessing both extreme wealth and poverty, which instilled a sense of shame when experiencing financial struggles as an adult.

3. Transitioning into Adulthood and Financial Literacy

As adults, both hosts faced new financial challenges, especially when transitioning into roles that required financial responsibility without prior education.

• Taryn's Struggle:

  • [06:53] "It was pretty low stakes because I would just go to work, I would make. And frankly, I made a lot of money as a waitress."
  • Despite a decent income as a waitress, Taryn admits her lack of financial knowledge when she ventured into owning a business and becoming a content creator.

• Tiffany's Journey:

  • [04:30] "I used to not even look at my bank account when stuff, girl, I would just spin."
  • Tiffany shares her initial neglect of financial management, only becoming proactive as her responsibilities grew.

4. Addressing Financial Anxiety and Seeking Help

Both hosts open up about their ongoing struggles with financial anxiety and the steps they've taken to address it.

• Taryn on Financial Anxiety:

  • [03:57] "I felt like that absolutely would make my stomach drop."
  • Her upbringing instilled a deep-seated anxiety about money, leading her to seek therapy and professional help to change her relationship with finances.

• Tiffany's Functional Fear:

  • [12:56] "My biggest fear is I'm going to squander my wealth a little bit that I've managed to accumulate."
  • Tiffany acknowledges her fear as a driving force that keeps her disciplined in managing her finances.

5. Advice on Handling Money and Seeking Expertise

Taryn and Tiffany emphasize the importance of professional financial advice and living below one’s means.

• Taryn’s Advice:

  • [14:45] "Look at me. If you have any amount of money, hire people who know what they're doing to help you with your money, and then listen to them."
  • She advocates for hiring financial professionals to navigate complex financial landscapes.

• Tiffany’s Fundamental Advice:

  • [14:45] "Live below your means."
  • Tiffany reinforces the timeless advice of spending less than you earn as a foundation for financial stability.

6. Parenting and Educating Children About Money

The conversation shifts to how they wish to educate their future children about money, aiming to remove fear and instill a healthy relationship with finances.

• Tiffany on Parenting:

  • [16:06] "I want my kids to come sliding out the womb knowing that you have access to great things, whether that be financial wealth..."
  • She envisions a future where her children view money as accessible and manageable without it causing fear.

• Taryn’s Perspective:

  • [17:28] "I just don't want my children to have this thing where they have a dollar in their pocket and they're worried."
  • Taryn aims to break the cycle of financial anxiety for her children by fostering a balanced and positive view of money.

7. Humorous Anecdotes and Lighthearted Discussion

To keep the conversation engaging, Taryn and Tiffany share funny stories about their financial mishaps.

• Struggling with Jobs:

  • [11:14] "I dropped my resume off at the strip club the day before."
  • Tiffany humorously recounts her unusual job-hunting experience, highlighting the unpredictable nature of financial challenges.

• Car Troubles:

  • [24:05] Taryn narrates a dramatic story of driving her unreliable Volvo, "Louie," which ultimately got towed after a near-disastrous attempt to make it to class on time.

8. Money in Relationships and Friendships

A significant segment discusses how money influences dating and friendships, emphasizing different approaches and expectations.

• Dating Dynamics:

  • [29:18] "I would be lying if I said it didn't."
  • Tiffany explains how her financial concerns affect her dating choices, seeking partners who are generous yet financially responsible.

• Friendship Finances:

  • [26:33] "I am not keeping a running tally. So if I got dinner last time, I don't remember who got dinner last time."
  • Taryn shares her relaxed approach to financial exchanges in friendships, contrasting it with Tiffany’s more meticulous method of tracking expenses.

9. Closing Thoughts and Call to Action

The episode concludes with a blend of humor and earnest advice, encouraging listeners to reflect on their own financial relationships and engage with the hosts.

• Final Advice:

  • [35:01] "Get an accountant. If the IRS is watching. No, you're not."
  • Taryn wraps up by reiterating the importance of professional financial help while keeping the tone light-hearted.

• Engagement Invitation:

  • [28:38] "How have your relationship with money changed or has it not changed? And how have you learned about yourself with money?"
  • The hosts invite listeners to share their own experiences, fostering a community of support and shared learning.

Notable Quotes:

• Taryn [07:00]: "The worst thing that I was doing was hiding the fact that I don't know what I'm doing with my finances."

• Tiffany [14:45]: "Listen to him and then live below your means."

• Taryn [14:21]: "Look at me. If you have any amount of money, hire people who know what they're doing to help you with your money, and then listen to them."

• Tiffany [16:06]: "I want my kids to come sliding out the womb knowing that you have access to great things, whether that be financial wealth..."

• Taryn [26:33]: "I am not keeping a running tally. So if I got dinner last time, I don't remember who got dinner last time."

Conclusion

"We're Your Girls" delivers a heartfelt and humorous exploration of money, blending personal stories with practical advice. Taryn and Tiffany's candid discussions demystify financial anxieties and encourage listeners to seek knowledge and support in their financial journeys. Whether navigating the complexities of adulthood finances or balancing money in relationships, the hosts provide relatable insights that resonate with a broad audience.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• [07:00] Taryn: "The worst thing that I was doing was hiding the fact that I don't know what I'm doing with my finances."
• [14:21] Taryn: "Look at me. If you have any amount of money, hire people who know what they're doing to help you with your money, and then listen to them."
• [14:45] Tiffany: "Listen to him and then live below your means."
• [16:06] Tiffany: "I want my kids to come sliding out the womb knowing that you have access to great things, whether that be financial wealth..."
• [26:33] Taryn: "I am not keeping a running tally. So if I got dinner last time, I don't remember who got dinner last time."

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Final Thoughts: This episode of "We're Your Girls" masterfully combines humor with depth, addressing the often-taboo topic of money with openness and relatability. Taryn and Tiffany not only share their vulnerabilities but also offer actionable advice, making financial conversations accessible and less intimidating for their audience.

Transcript

[A]

We're really excited to share that La Roche Posay is sponsoring this episode. And we're so excited to be continuing our partnership with them today.

[B]

Well, hold on. Don't you mean La Roche Posay?

[A]

La Roche Posay, if you didn't know, La Roche Posay is a French skincare brand that's recommended by dermatologists.

[B]

Okay, her. So tell us a little bit more later on in the episode.

[A]

Well, I'm gonna have to because they're presenting this episode.

[B]

Girl, this is an ad.

[A]

Oh, we try. Diva. Cause we're your girl. Hey.

[B]

Cause I like how you do.

[A]

Welcome back to this week's episode of we're youe Girls.

[B]

Hi, guys. It's so good to see you. So good to be with you.

[A]

We missed you.

[B]

Welcome.

[A]

Anyway, girl, welcome back to the couch.

[B]

Ciao.

[A]

How's everyone's week been?

[B]

How was your week? You tell us.

[A]

Fabulous. Absolutely fantastic. That's great.

[B]

I love that.

[A]

I'm a professional clown. I don't know if you knew that. So I clowned around all week. I love to hear it. And you know what I always say?

[B]

Tell me.

[A]

I'm just a little clown. What do you want me to do? Sometimes I just gotta clown around.

[B]

You said that in Paris for the first time. And we bout collapsed. But we were seated.

[A]

I said, what do you want me to do?

[B]

I'm a clown.

[A]

And sometimes I gotta clown around.

[B]

It's the truest thing you've ever said.

[A]

So I've been clowning around. What about you?

[B]

I clowned. I did a little. You know what? I worked a little, you know, PR'd a little. Did the things. Well, this week, my boy, we're talking about money.

[A]

Oh. And it makes me so uncomfortable.

[B]

Does it really?

[A]

I am. I. I do not like talking about money. I joke about money.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

But I cannot bring myself to actually seriously talk about money. Because. Which is why I think this is fun and interesting.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because. And I want to change this about myself. I was not raised the way I was raised. We did not. We don't talk about money. Other than. Unless my, you know, privately at home. My mom was complaining about the fact that we don't have money. Right. If she was like, we have this much money till next payday.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So everyone stop asking for stuff. Which was. I mean, that's just. That's. That is a normal experience. I don't think I'm one of many, many, many Americans that was in that middle class, I think, sector in which.

[B]

You toggled back and forth. We.

[A]

Toggled back and forth between being very financially stable and then also going through some intense scarcity.

[B]

Same here.

[A]

And toggling back, which is, you know, a very. That is an American experience.

[B]

It sure is. It sure is. That's a good point. I'll ask you a question, because I'm curious when. Because I know I have my answer to this. Also, when your mom would say things like, we have X amount of money until the end of the quarter, paycheck, whatever, next week.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Did that ever scare the shit out of you, or were you always just like, well, this is fine. It is what it is? I would hear that, and my stomach would curdle. I hated knowing how much money we had.

[A]

Well, I think I like to live.

[B]

In a fantasy world.

[A]

I've had a lot of therapy for it. Now, that was a trauma, and I feel like I started to internalize it and just be like, this is just what life is like. But, yes, I did start to feel really. It was really anxiety. Now, I mean, I'm a really anxious person, but that would make me really anxious. My mom did a great job, and she was doing the best she could with what she could, and no parent was perfect. My mom is an amazing person. But that was. You know, she was a single mom, and I think that when she would say that, it simply was. She was at the end of her rope. And she literally was just like, y'all, I love you, but I. I can't have this conversation right now. This is what I'm worried about. And my mom's an amazing mom, so I feel. I feel like I have to say that because I'm talking about this openly, and if she was here, she would be like, I know. I know I did that. But, yes, I. I felt like that absolutely would make my stomach drop.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And either of my. And both of my parents, separately, both did it. And I remember this feeling of impending doom and not being. And then the moment that they, you know, took you to McDonald's or something. I remember just eating my fries with a shaking hand. Can we. When in reality, they're like, chill out. We can afford this. But in my mind, I'm like, well, now we're having a treat that I did. I earned this treat. Did we deserve this? Because I know things are limited.

[B]

Yeah. And I feel the need to give the same exact disclosure as, well. Anita. Mommy, I know you did all that you could and you were doing well. My girl Proddy.

[A]

My mom did a great job, for real.

[B]

So I feel that goes without saying. But we said it anyway. Moms. Y'all really, really did do a great job. But I would say the same that has now manifested to me as an adult. I don't even are used to because I'm not in that position anymore. I think the Lord, I used to not even look at my bank account when stuff, girl, I would just spin. I wouldn't even know the password to Chase. If they came in looking for me, they found the wrong one because I didn't have the proper information to access those accounts.

[A]

It was the text of hello, Taryn, you were overdrawn by email for me. Like, no, don't go.

[B]

And then I delete the email so that I didn't know it. I would just live in bliss because I did not want to know the details of my financial strain.

[A]

I still don't.

[B]

But now these days, I'll be looking, I'll be checking.

[A]

Well, now. Well, things are different now.

[B]

Things are different now.

[A]

And that's one really interesting thing about going into. Both of us are in the entertainment industry now. And then you're also. You own your own. We both own our own businesses. You're a publicist as well as being with me in the entertainment industry. And it's just different. You're functioning in a way in which you don't have the opportunity. When I was a waitress, I'll admit it was pretty low stakes because I would just go to work, I would make. And frankly, I made a lot of money as a waitress.

[B]

Ditto.

[A]

Thank you, Dr. Sadler. Those implants did the job.

[B]

I'm coming to him next.

[A]

A tavern with my financed breast implants. Here we go. I made some choices in my early 20s and they're none of your business anyway.

[B]

So they paid off in dividends.

[A]

They really did. Paid off.

[B]

Pun intended.

[A]

But like, yeah, no. So, you know, I made great money in tips as a waitress. Um, but that's just different when. And then, you know, that's just different than when you go, you kind of get your big girl job, whatever that looks like you're getting your. And for us, we're running our own businesses. We now no longer have the luxury of being like, I'm sure it'll all work out by Friday. Now it's. You know, there are people that rely on me to make sure that I pay them. And I need to make. I want to pay those people.

[B]

And the money is not as consistent either.

[A]

No. And you. So you've got to budget that money.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And one thing that really struck me was how inept and unprepared I was to do any of this, despite the fact that by the time I owned my own business, became a content creator and ran business, I had a whole master's. Not in business. Granted, I did not have a master's. I have my master's in international communications and diplomacy. I have no. I had no idea really how any of this worked. I. Frank, I certainly had no concept of how my student loans worked when I took all those out.

[B]

Did you have credit at the time? Any kind of credit card, anything?

[A]

No. I got my first credit card when I became a content creator and opened my business.

[B]

You did tell me this, which was very different for me. I got mine at 18. Soon as I could. Maxed it out four days paying for my prom dress. Crazy. Anyway, keep going.

[A]

That's very good.

[B]

It was designer. It was worth it. Monique Lier. What can I say? Anyway, okay, yes, you had no credit, didn't know anything about anything. About nothing. About nothing.

[A]

So something that really struck me and that I wish I could have told my younger self was the worst thing that you are doing right now is hiding the fact that you don't know what you're doing with your finances. Not. I would just went around, around like just trying to not talk about it because I was embarrassed. I was. The worst thing that I was doing is I was really embarrassed by how much I didn't know.

[B]

Now this is the question. Were you embarrassed by what you didn't know or were you embarrassed that you didn't have money?

[A]

Probably both. No, I've never been. I was never. When I first moved to New York and I was hustling and I'm walking dogs and waitressing, I was actually really proud of the fact that I was working so hard. I never occurred to me to be embarrassed about my lack of money. Cause frankly, no one I knew was super wealthy. But the moment I stepped into spaces and sat down at tables with people that knew what they were doing with their finances and had stocks, well, I'll be honest. I still don't know what's going on. I don't know how my. I know my money's in the market somewhere.

[B]

You better than me, child.

[A]

My money's in the market. Wait on that.

[B]

Let it sizzle. I'll come back to you.

[A]

Let my money work. Because she's doing something. Do I know what she's doing in the market? Absolutely not.

[B]

No.

[A]

But the point is, is that when I got to into these rooms and when I sat down at these tables, I suddenly Felt like, oh, I should know all this because you guys know all this. I don't know any of this. I went from, you know, being a waitress and then working in a call center, and it came to suddenly, yeah. Working in the entertainment industry. And I got my first big check, and I really didn't know what to do with it. And so thank goodness. I. Thank goodness I had really good management. Shout out to Shosh.

[B]

We love you, Shosh.

[A]

Shoshana looked at me in my eye and said, you don't have a credit card? You've never had a credit card? I said, nope, I'm gonna cash this check and put it under my mattress. Don't worry about me.

[B]

Bury Mr. Krabs. Yeah, I was Mr. His mattress.

[A]

And so she immediately connected me with finance professionals that knew what they were doing. And that was when I quickly had. I. My relationship with money really started changing quickly. It's still changing. I'm still working on it. And the point of this entire monologue is that the most important thing I found, and you and I talk about it now all the time, is people that have money, work with money, understand money, aren't afraid to talk about money.

[B]

That's true.

[A]

It's not taboo. They ask questions when they don't know the answers. Right.

[B]

They compare. Know the answer. They find somebody who does, and they.

[A]

Compare notes with other people. They say, is this what you did with your money? This is what I did with mine. How have you found that? These are questions I was never taught to ask. So anyways, how about you jump off that? But did you ever feel that way? Like, and have you felt that shift?

[B]

So I will say you said something that struck me as interesting, because I had the opposite encounter. I grew up around people with money, even though we didn't have it.

[A]

Yeah, because you grew up in South Florida.

[B]

In South Florida, in one of the wealthiest zip codes in the country. Country. But the way that Palm beach, at least Palm beach county is separated, Palm beach island is like the wealthiest zip code in the nation. And then right across a very small intercoastal, some of the poorest people in the nation. At the same time, I was on the other side of the intercoastal. Now, we weren't, you know, destitute all the time, just like you said. Like, money was a pendulum. It was constantly swinging.

[A]

You're pretty. A middle class family.

[B]

Definitely middle class. And when we weren't, we weren't. But I was always exposed to extreme wealth and didn't really know. Like, it didn't ring as weird to me because I always saw it. Now, did we have it? No. So when I found myself in situations as an adult when I didn't have money, I was always. I had the shame that I didn't have money. Whereas you didn't have shame about being broke. I did. Or. Whereas you said. What did you say?

[A]

You said, I work kind of as a. It was like a cute character trait.

[B]

It became cute for me eventually when we met is when it got cute. Cause I definitely called Taryn when things got rough one day and I was like, girl, I'm about to hit the pole. And we went to Bethesda Fountain, and we had known each other for two weeks.

[A]

It was freezing cold, Cold as hell. I met Tiffany in the middle of Central park at Bethesda Fountain. We sat down and I went, well, buddy, what's going on? And she said those words, I'm about.

[B]

To hit the pole.

[A]

And I said, hang on, What? And I said, let's talk about this. And you went, taryn, I dropped my resume off at the strip club the day before.

[B]

I had gone to four. Can you imagine?

[A]

I was more shocked that they accepted resumes.

[B]

I mean, they laughed for sure. These big brawly ass men were like, thanks, miss. And I'm like, you're welcome. Walking on.

[A]

I'm efficient on Excel.

[B]

Literally. It was crazy. And that was when it. I won't say got the worst, but that was the moment in my life where I was like, ooh, child, it's no longer cute for you to be like, trap. Seeing traipsing around New York City with, like, nothing. You got to have to start to have something. Because this was right before COVID or. No, this is right after Covid.

[A]

This is right after we met. Right?

[B]

Right after Covid. And that's when things got real. Because I was like, oh, shit. Like, if the economy or world collapses again, I'm an adult now. Like, what am I going to do? Right? Because if my mom ain't got it, I definitely ain't got it. So that means we both ain't got it. And now I'm an adult and we ain't got it. Which is very different from being a child and not gotten it. What did you say? You said shame versus. What was the other thing? Shame versus.

[A]

I had shame. The moment I started making some money, it became very clear that I had no idea what to do with it.

[B]

Shame versus a lack of education. Okay, so I was more comfortable with a lack of education, Was very uncomfortable with the shame of Being broke, I guess is the better way to say it. Now I'm completely past that. And I'm now where you are. I'm like, oh, now you got to start learning things because you got a little bit of coin in your pocket. What you going to do about it? Because as you know, my biggest fear is now having money and blowing it. Or Mike Tyson. Tyson in this bitch and bite my ear off. That or going broke, you know, either one. But honestly, the fear is I'm going to squander my wealth a little bit that I've managed to accumulate and have. Or many months, years, whatever. That's my biggest fear.

[A]

I gotta admit though, I don't think that that's a bad fear. I think that's a functional fear. I think there are certain fears that keep us safe. I always have the same fear. So whenever I spend a dime, I have a lot of guilt about spending money on myself.

[B]

Oh, see, we different.

[A]

Which I'm working on. Cause you. I like being friends with you though, because the moment I turn to Tiffany and I'm like, I really want this frivolous thing and Tiffany will be like, get it, do it. I don't need to hear what it is.

[B]

Spend it. So as you can imagine, you're like a little raven.

[A]

I would say you collect sparkly thing.

[B]

It's horrible. And I. That's why I have this deep seated fear, because I won't be able to check myself. Like, if I want it, I'mma get it. And then I'm like, oh, you got too close to the sun.

[A]

Finance savvy people that I hire to pay attention to me and talk to me. It's crazy. It is crazy. To pay some by the hour to spend time with you. That's crazy.

[B]

Work laugh is wild. That's what it sounds like.

[A]

I'm like, my guy's named Gavin. But Gavin, God bless him, what am I doing wrong? And he's like, well, where do you want me to start? And I'm like, ooh, let's get going. Because I got 50 more minutes. And if you want to learn more about this, go listen to a finance podcast. This is not the place for you. This is for two women on a couch getting drunk, complaining about money.

[B]

Amen.

[A]

Or not complaining. This is two women on a couch talking about money.

[B]

There we go. We talk, we commiserate. Yeah, I love that.

[A]

And so, yeah, the point is that I'm not gonna say what exactly what I do, because I am not qualified to give any of you advice. The best Advice I'm gonna give you. Look at me. If you're listening to this. I'm looking at my camera. Look at me. If you have any amount of money, hire people who know what they're doing to help you with your money, and then listen to them.

[B]

Listen to him and then live below your means. I feel like that's, like, understated advice that we always hear, but never listen.

[A]

To them live below your means. And if you need to ask the person you hired, what are my means? They will make a budget for you so you can know what your means are.

[B]

Wow. That's next steps for me. And now a word from our sponsors.

[A]

Ah.

[B]

I just realized I haven't reapplied my.

[A]

Sunscreen every two hours. Diva.

[B]

But guess which one from La Roche Posay I'm currently using?

[A]

Is it the same one I'm thinking about?

[B]

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[A]

It's out now in three new flexible shades, which is great since I go from brown in the summer to diet brown in the winter. I hate my pale season, but at least it's a sunscreen shade for my skin tone.

[B]

I love using this one because it's great for my skin. It feels great and is very blendable. I love all things La Roche Posay because she really is that girl. And bonus, she's great for the sensitive skin. Girlies.

[A]

Absolutely. I'm one of those. Anyway, head straight to La Roche Posay us to get your Anthelios tinted mineral sunscreen and shop all things La Roche Posay.

[B]

Scott, bottom beat up.

[A]

And now back to the show.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What do you want? When you have children eventually, how do you want their relationship with money to differ from what yours has been?

[B]

Mm. Good query. I don't want my children to be afraid to make money. I don't want them to be. I don't want money to be something that's wholly unattainable to them. That it's something that you don't have access to. It's not something that you get. Other people can have money, but you can't. No. I want my kids to come sliding out the womb knowing that you have access to great things, whether that be financial wealth, land wealth, like art wealth. I don't know anything. Wealth is available to you, and you can pursue it, and we have it. You can have it. My wealth may not necessarily be your wealth, meaning you need to go out and make your own money. That's fine. But we got you, and you Have a safe space to learn what your relationship with money looks like. You don't have to be afraid of it because Mommy's not afraid of it. Yeah, you don't have to be afraid of it because Daddy's not afraid of it. And if it ever disappears, it will come back. Also, like, I want my kids to know that money is not their God. Just as in the same way that we're told money doesn't bring happiness, money also doesn't have to bring extreme depression, extreme fear.

[A]

In the same way money doesn't buy happiness. Don't also think that it has to be something that is constantly this great creator of. You don't want it to be this thing that brings with it scarcity and fear and anxiety.

[B]

I want money and wealth to be something that is there. It is not how you live your life. It's not why you live your life. It's just there.

[A]

I agree from the standpoint that I learned through therapy that it is because of my upbringing that even now that I am, thank goodness, which I'm so grateful for, I'm. I am now financially stable.

[B]

Amen.

[A]

I. It doesn't matter.

[B]

Cheers to that.

[A]

Well, cheers. And yet I worry it doesn't have. Oh, God. Anyway, I just drink my wine. Even though I'm not financially stable because of, I think, my upbringing every day, I still. It's the. It's my greatest worry. I worry about money all the time. I worry. I worry about everyone around me. I worry about myself. I worry my family. I worry about everyone. Even though nobody's even told me right now, I'm worried about your financial situation.

[B]

I'm not worried about my money, but there it is.

[A]

I'm worried about it. And I'm realizing I had to learn in therapy. That wasn't evidence that there's anything wrong. It's evidenced by the fact this is the relationship I have learned to have with money, which is I just. Were. The only way I know how to live with it is to worry about it. Oh, I'm just worried about it all the time. And I'm really. I am actively working on this. I'll get back to you in a year. I hope that I can change this relationship. Because what's ironic is when I was a waitress and I was, oh, I'm down to the week, I was way less worried because I was comfortable with this tumultuous, scary relationship with money being like, I hope I make it by Friday. Like, that was more comfortable. That was because the worry was part of my everyday Life. And it wasn't, like, familiar. It was familiar. Yeah, you better be worried, girl, because you have to get groceries in a couple days. Now that I. Now that I am, I can relax. Yeah, I can't relax.

[B]

And true, there's. Arguably, the stakes are higher. Before, it was just you. You had to worry about in the impending student loans that would eventually come someday, but now.

[A]

And yet. Yeah, I keep waiting for the other shooter. I keep waiting for the day to come that I can stop worrying. And I'm realizing this has nothing to do with how much work I book. This has nothing to do with any. This is everything to do with my emotional and existential relationship with money, which is. Has been conditioned to be fearful. And I need to work. I need to work on this because I don't want my children. I don't want to rub this. Rub off on my kids one day. Yeah. I don't want my kids to be worried about this. And I don't care where I'm at. I don't care if I'm. If I. I'm. You know what I mean? It doesn't matter where I'm at financially. I just don't want my children to be. Have this thing where they have a dollar in their pocket and they're worried.

[B]

About it and they want to give it to mommy because mommy was stressed about it earlier.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. 1,000%.

[A]

Anyway, I'd agree. What is. We're moving this back to funny times because it's making me sad.

[B]

No, don't be sad.

[A]

This is making me sad. I'm really sad on the show, guys. Oh, let me play a sad song.

[B]

This is my favorite thing that she does.

[A]

I call this tribute to poverty. This is crazy. You're listening to NPR Jazz hour. Okay. What's the stupidest thing you ever did?

[B]

What's the stupidest?

[A]

To make money.

[B]

Oh, God.

[A]

What's the stupidest choice you ever made? Because of money.

[B]

Because of money? Or. Wait, which question?

[A]

What? I didn't know. There's. These are almost the same question.

[B]

We'll ask them again.

[A]

What's the stupidest thing you ever did? Either because of money to make money because you were in a pickle because you were in a pickle because of money. I think you just told the story when you applied to the strip clubs.

[B]

No, that wasn't a stupid.

[A]

Also, but you know what? Stripper. Strippers work hard.

[B]

Strippers work hard.

[A]

Strippers work hard.

[B]

That's why I thought I would do well. I'm a hard worker.

[A]

You are a Hard worker. Strippers work hard. Cheers.

[B]

Tomorrow. Ashy, though. So I wouldn't have made it on the pole, but that is another thing.

[A]

I would have loved to be a go. We both wanted to be go go dancers.

[B]

We still. There's this place on the Upper east side that has girlies that dance in the bar.

[A]

Ethel's.

[B]

Ethel's. We love Ethel's. Ethel's. If you're listening, I hope by some crazy happens, please let us dance.

[A]

Go, go.

[B]

Just one night. One night. One night only. Taryn and Tiffany, take the bar. We'll give you all the tips back.

[A]

Please. We don't you have to pay us.

[B]

Well, donate them.

[A]

You don't have to pay us.

[B]

Us. We don't need money.

[A]

We don't need money.

[B]

I mean. Well, hold on. Well, now hold on, because we don't sit all that. And the tips would be nice. We'll get back to you. Ethel's point being that wasn't the craziest thing.

[A]

I put it into my high yield savings account. I've got one of those now.

[B]

That's nice. Wait, you did tell me about this the other day. This is great news. Yeah, that's wonderful. We'll revisit this. What's the craziest thing I've ever did? In the name of the dollar, I've pawned some things.

[A]

That's not funny. I'm sorry.

[B]

I was like a teacher. My mom was so upset. She was like, oh, to a pawn shop girl. I took my iPad to the pawn shop. I did. I. Sorry, Daddy. My dad got me an iPad for Christmas, and I kept it for years. And then I was like, I don't even know what I pawned it for. I think it may have been for gas money. This is when I was, like, 18. And I'm not proud, but I don't like to ask for money because back.

[A]

Then, I mean, just like we said.

[B]

It was always going to get better. Like, we'd come across money eventually. It was going to be fine. But I was like, this is how I'm going to come across my coin. I sure did take it to the pawn shop on Okeechobee. And the man was like, I'll give you 75. And I was like, this was worth 350. And he's like, but it has a giant crack in the screen. And I was like, deal. Take it.

[A]

Say no more.

[B]

Say no more, buddy. It's all yours.

[A]

And you walk away. Shacker. I'm 75 smackaroon treasure.

[B]

And it took, like, $50 to fill the tank of my Jetta.

[A]

At the time, I too drove a Jetta.

[B]

Girls drove bad Jetta's girls. Yeah. That was the craziest thing I'd done. I was like 18.

[A]

I drove a 19. Before I drove my Jetta, I drove a 1998 Volvo named Louis. He was on his last leg. It was a friend, a family friend's daughter's car. And then she went off to college and they gave it to my mom. That's sweet, knowing that probably had moments left on its life. But I love that car. And every time he turned it on, when the air came through the vents, it smelled like a Crayola crayon.

[B]

It's old cars always smell like the crayon smell.

[A]

And I love that car. It was my first car. I was so proud of that car.

[B]

Is it still around?

[A]

Babe?

[B]

Babe.

[A]

I watched Louie get taken away on a tow truck. No. I played the gladiator soundtrack as it was driven away. Always was breaking down. And I went to community college on the top of a hill near my house. When I went. When I was lived in Seattle, I went to South Seattle Community College. Go Otters.

[B]

No, not the Otters.

[A]

Go Otters.

[B]

Go Otter.

[A]

We chose the mascot while I was at that school. Anyway, now it's just called South Seattle College. But I went to South Seattle Community College at the time. And I always knew that car was, you know, it was not reliable. But one day I turned it on and I tried to pull out of the spot and it was going. But there was something wrong with the transmission. And it would not go above like five miles an hour. It was like, literally this was a. But I had class in 15 minutes and I had a choice to make. And I had already missed class multiple times and been late to this class. And I didn't want to fail.

[B]

Uh oh.

[A]

So I was like, I'm gonna take her to the top of the hill. We can do this. Like Thomas the train. I took that car on the highway going 15 miles an hour, and I put on my four way flashers and I drove in the fog lane all.

[B]

The way to Dayton.

[A]

Every time I took a quarter, I was. And then at one point, I got to the top of the hill and I was like, thank God I got to the top. I was really worried about that. And then it was down the hill and I just put it in the neutral all the way down. And I remember catching the turn going into the school. It was like neutral. I ghosted into the parking lot, put it in the park. And I ran into class and the teacher. I'm lit. Of course I'm late. I'm screaming, sorry. Car travels. I had no idea. Oh, my God. It got towed from the school parking lot. Imagine you turn the corner on two wheels and you're going so far.

[B]

That's insane, Taryn.

[A]

And that was. That was the last time I ever saw Louie alive.

[B]

That's so dangerous.

[A]

I wanted him back, too. I was like, tow him for now, but let me know where he ends up.

[B]

Get him back.

[A]

He will be back in my custody.

[B]

Oh, my God. That's.

[A]

And they were like, ma'am, this is. You should not drive this car. It's about to blow up in the middle of the road with you in it. You want to get incinerated?

[B]

It's crazy.

[A]

I was like, phooey, he's fine. Just give him a little tuna, will you?

[B]

Oh, my God. That's hilarious.

[A]

Anyway, I love that people are funny about money.

[B]

People are funny about.

[A]

People are funny about money. I don't think. Other than the fact that I get uncomfortable talking about it, which I'm trying to get over, I don't think I'm worried about money from the standpoint that, like, for example, in our friendship. And I'm. This is. This is one thing about me. I'm not keeping a running tally. So if I got dinner last time, I don't remember who got dinner last time. We. I always assume that we're gonna get each other back, but we all have that friend who. When you're done hanging out with them.

[B]

Send the Venmo request.

[A]

Send the Venmo request right away. Like, they're like, I have a friend who once sent me a three dollar Venmo request for a bagel.

[B]

No.

[A]

Because she, like, grabbed us bagels.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And it's fine. I paid her right away because I get it. When people are funny about their money, they funny, as Samantha Jones once said.

[B]

Huh.

[A]

Make sure that you honor, you know, their boundaries with money. If they're like. They're like, I'm keeping I even three bucks, I want to be paid back for. I get that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

However, I have to say, I'm not like that. And so I do find that really interesting. It's like. And I've actually found that people that grew up in more scarcity aren't necessarily the ones that do that.

[B]

I know.

[A]

But you know what it is? I think it's folks that grew up talking about money in their household. They know that maybe three bucks isn't much to you Right now. But it builds up over time, so make sure you get paid back.

[B]

That's true. I think it's interesting the way that I am in that particular situation. I want to be billed back immediately. Like, I want somebody to hit me with the $3 Venmo because I don't want to seem like I'm keeping people money.

[A]

Fair enough. And I don't want to owe you money.

[B]

So that's my weird hang up. Like, send me the Venmo girl. Don't forget, because I will remind you. Like. Like when we went to Paris, for example, we had decided, like, I will pay for dinners, because you would come out of pocket for a lot of things. And I was like, perfect, I will pay for every dinner. And you're like, no, it's fine. Once we got there. And I was like, no, we decided ahead of time that this is how it's gonna be. And I stuck to my guns about it because I hate to be the one that, like, doesn't repay her debts. Does that make sense?

[A]

Fair enough. Sure.

[B]

Though nobody is thinking that. I'm immediately assuming people are like, tiffany, don't pay her bills. And I can't stand that.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

So I can see where people come from when they do that.

[A]

I understand. I just think it's fun. I think it's interesting. And I'm always interested in friendships. How if you have two friends that function in two different ways, money wise.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

How they navigate those things. But guys, comment, Tell us, send us some messages. Emails. However. Homing pigeons.

[B]

I was just gonna say pigeons.

[A]

What have you learned? How has your relationship with money change or has it not changed? And. And how. What have you learned about yourself with money? Oh, my God. There's other things to talk about. This romantic relationships and money is so interesting to me. That's a whole nother. I think that on, frankly, is a whole nother conversation. Oh, 1000% that's a whole nother conversation.

[B]

I just will say this. It informs the way I date, period. It definitely does. I would be lying if I said it didn't.

[A]

I knew I loved my husband on our first date because he was by no means a rich man. He was a personal trainer at an LA Fitness. And I was no princess. I had no large dowry. I hadn't a large dowry, darling. I was working as a dress sales girl. I made seven. I made 15 an hour, which would then be raised to 17 an hour.

[B]

Oh, what a blessing.

[A]

Three years later. Damn. Anyways, the point is. But I knew I loved my husband. That despite the fact that he didn't make a ton of money, he was a very, very, very generous tipper. Everywhere we went, even if the service was bad, he always tips well. And I was like, that's my man. Because I don't care. I mean, frankly, I always appreciate when people are generous with me, but I'm really interested in the fact. Are you generous with other people?

[B]

With other people?

[A]

Are you generous with people that can.

[B]

Do nothing for you that you'll probably never see again?

[A]

That tells me all I need to know. My producer's nodding her head in the back. She agrees. She's nodding ferociously. And she is not even from America.

[B]

Why you be calling Tracy out?

[A]

She's from another country. She knows that matters.

[B]

It's true. This is a point of contention, or was a point of contention a lot of my early girlfriend relationships. I would tell the girls, don't go out with a man who's not paying on the first date. And that's on, period. Don't even fake reach for your wallet. That's the craziest thing I've ever heard of.

[A]

Fake reach.

[B]

Girl, I don't fake reach. And you shouldn't either.

[A]

The fact you don't even go for your coin.

[B]

Hell no.

[A]

You don't go for your kind pass.

[B]

I'd be sitting there, like.

[A]

Holding eye.

[B]

Contact, looking crazy as hell, because I don't do that. And now one of my girlfriends has started to adapt this after years and years of us being friends. She's like, you know what? I'm gonna try it. She's gone on some dates. 2 dates.

[A]

Touch not your coin purse.

[B]

Correct. She's gone on two dates, adopting this policy. She doesn't reach for the wallet.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

One guy goes and he tells her, I really didn't appreciate the fact that you didn't even offer to split the bill. What do you even say to that? Exactly. You cough and you swallow uncomfortably. So he. And he made a point to tell her after the date, they had a whole conversation about it. That he does not date women who don't offer to split the bill. Because in his mind, that tells him everything he needs to know about a girl. The second guy.

[A]

What is there to know?

[B]

Hell if I know. That she ain't reaching for the bill. I guess that. Cause that's all that cues me into. Needless to say, they didn't go on another day. Good written. Now, the second guy. Hold on. I have to think about it.

[A]

No, I will say this after you. You have been dating. Now you're Dating a month, five dates later, you're just hanging out. Now, I wouldn't expect a man to finance my entire life, which is that means that, you know, you both make good money and yet you continue to expect him to pay for everything. I think I can understand why a conversation would inevitably happen where a gentleman might be like, a gentleman. A gentleman. A gentleman might certainly break up. I don't know why I said like that. A guy might say, hey, you know, can we start going Dutch on a couple things? Correct again. If that would totally put a bad taste in your mouth, then I expose we date differently, have different expectations, but I would say after some time together. There's a fine line between expecting a man to finance your life, you know, and a man paying for dates.

[B]

I am a woman who has gone on many a date, and I've never had to have that conversation once because it is always a seamless transition between, we are going on early dates, you are courting me.

[A]

There you go.

[B]

Or you logically are the bill to the point where I'm like, okay, great, I would love to treat you. And then it becomes that easy back and forth exchange. In all of my years of dating, not that there have been many, but I have gone on a lot of dates, I've never had to have that conversation.

[A]

Fair enough.

[B]

So I found it so interesting that my poor girlfriend who tries this new theory gets called out immediately by a man who's like, oh, no, that doesn't work.

[A]

I don't think she should change what she's doing, though.

[B]

What do you mean?

[A]

I think she should continue to not reach on the first date.

[B]

I think so too. Now I'm curious. I want to know how y'all feel about this. Do you reach for the wallet? And if so, what's your reasoning? If you don't reach for the wallet, what's your reasoning? Or better question, do you think I'm crazy that I don't reach for the wallet? Like, I. I genuinely, genuinely want to know what the girlies are out here doing.

[A]

I haven't been on a date in 10 years.

[B]

But if I was, what would you do? Do you reach for the wallet if you were dating or not anymore, but back then or now, if you were to be dating, would you reach for the wallet? It's tough. Why is this a tough question?

[A]

Well, because for me, this. It's almost like a trap. I'm gonna reach because I want you to emphatically stop me.

[B]

But then when they don't, I would.

[A]

Probably turn the guy and Be like, I gotta be honest. I was gonna grab my wallet. I didn't even bring my wallet. I. And it's a little weird that you let me get all the way to my wallet. This was a trick and a trap, and you failed. So I'm gonna go. And you, good luck with all this.

[B]

Correct. Correct.

[A]

But thank you for this trip to the Outback Steakhouse.

[B]

This was great, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

[A]

I truly love a good Cheesecake Factory night. Thank you for my gumbo.

[B]

Gumbo at the Cheesecake Factory.

[A]

My dad's favorite.

[B]

I love that, though.

[A]

Anyway, point.

[B]

Me.

[A]

Yeah. What were you. Yeah. So let us know. Do you reach for your wallet? Has your relationship with money changed? How are you guys doing? I need more wine.

[B]

Me do.

[A]

All right. Well, I hope you have a good week. I hope you make some money this week. Yeah.

[B]

I enjoyed this talk.

[A]

Me, too. For next week, put your money in the market. Not too much, not too little. We'll discuss just enough. Maybe don't do that. I don't know.

[B]

Don't take my advice.

[A]

Don't take my advice. I don't even know what's going on in the market. Where is the market? Who's running it? Where's it at?

[B]

That's a good question. All valid queries.

[A]

I'll call Kelly, my accountant. Love her. She's amazing. Gavin and Kelly, you actually do need.

[B]

To send me her number, though.

[A]

I do actually. Get an accountant. Get a bookkeeper.

[B]

I'm trying. You got to send me a book.

[A]

I'm talking to them.

[B]

Oh, my bad. Yeah, get a book.

[A]

Have a great week. Get an accountant. If the IRS is watching. No, you're not. Forget you, Silas. You don't even know who I am. I pay my taxes. Leave me alone. I hope you guys have a great week. Love you. And remember. And remember, we're your girls. Cause we're your girls. Hey.

[B]

Cause I like how you do.

[A]

Wear your curls is hosted and executive produced by Darren Delany Smith and her friend Tiffany Singleton, Management by Social Media produced. Good. Best Media. Tiffany, do the next pod.

[B]

Do I do it in a candy voice?

[A]

Nah, just do it in a normal voice.

[B]

Follow us on all platforms at WearYourGirlSpod. Before we close out, you know we gotta thank our partner, LaRoche Posay again for always vibing with your girls. Don't forget that SPF and visit LaRoche posay us.