WETSU: A Battleship New Jersey Podcast

Episode: Asw. Melinda Kane: Turning Grief into Purpose & Public Service
Release Date: May 21, 2025

Introduction and Guest Background

Hosted by Marshall Spivak, CEO and Executive Director of the Battleship New Jersey Museum of Memorial, this episode features Assemblywoman Melinda Kane, a devoted Gold Star mother and a pillar of the South Jersey community. Melinda shares her profound journey from personal loss to public service, highlighting her advocacy for military families and veterans.

Personal Journey and Loss

Melinda Kane opens up about her late husband, Major Bruce Kane, an Army physician who passed away from cancer in 2008, and her son, Lance Corporal Jeremy Kane, who was tragically killed in Afghanistan on January 23, 2010.

• Military Commitment:
  "His decision was based on financial reasons... his father had served in the military as well as his uncle." (02:36)

• Son's Calling and Deployment:
  Jeremy enlisted in the Marine Corps Reserves, inspired by a sense of patriotism. Melinda recounts the devastating day she learned of Jeremy's deployment and subsequent loss.
  "He was willing to die to save his fellow men." (10:44)

Channeling Grief into Advocacy

Instead of succumbing to grief, Melinda chose to honor Jeremy's legacy through active involvement in the Gold Star community and public service.

• Initial Advocacy Efforts:
  "He thinks that everyone has a right, had they should be giving back to their country." (14:12)
  She emphasizes the importance of respecting and supporting those who serve, advocating for programs that honor fallen service members and their families.

• Involvement with TAPS:
  Melinda describes how the Therapy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS) played a crucial role in her healing process.
  "It was so helpful to be surrounded by other family members... it really helped me to survive and to be able to continue to parent my other sons." (15:34)
  She later became a peer mentor and full-time volunteer, supporting other grieving families.

Transition to Public Office

Melinda’s personal loss fueled her desire to make systemic changes, leading her to run for public office.

• Motivation to Serve:
  "If you're living the life you never thought you'd live, you might as well do the things you never thought you would do." (18:50)
  This philosophy guided her decision to enter politics, where she could effect meaningful change for veterans and their families.

• Impact as a Commissioner:
  Serving on the Cherry Hill Township Council and Camden County Board of Commissioners, Melinda championed veterans affairs, established programs honoring Vietnam veterans, and promoted suicide awareness and prevention.

Current Role in the New Jersey General Assembly

As of January 23, Melinda serves in the New Jersey General Assembly, representing the 6th Legislative District.

• Legislative Priorities:
  Melinda focuses on enhancing support for veterans, including:

  • Extending education benefits to siblings of fallen service members.
  • Introducing legislation for official service animal identification to prevent discrimination and ensure access to healthcare facilities.
    "There will be an ID and back to IDs that will state, you know, and this is purely voluntary..." (35:50)

• Challenges and Rewards:
  Adapting to the responsibilities of the State House, she finds fulfillment in the ability to enact change.
  "To be in a position where to make things happen has really been very rewarding." (27:35)

Connection to Battleship New Jersey

Melinda highlights the Battleship New Jersey as a significant venue for meaningful ceremonies and a symbol of military honor.

• Emotional Significance of the Battleship:
  Hosting medal ceremonies and commemorative events on the battleship enhances the emotional weight and connection for veterans and their families.
  "Being aboard the battleship just had a very different feeling than holding a medal ceremony at some other venue." (37:11)

Closing Insights and Messages

Melinda imparts valuable advice to those experiencing loss and underscores the importance of societal support for military families.

• Advice for Grieving Families:
  "How you feel today is not how you're always going to feel... that grief will change to purpose if you allow it." (38:47)
  She emphasizes resilience and the transformative power of turning pain into purposeful action.

• Call for Civilian Understanding and Support:
  "Be grateful... to be respectful of that and to provide the support that they need always." (40:19)
  Melinda urges civilians to appreciate the sacrifices of military families and to support veterans through accessible resources and respectful acknowledgment.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• "He was willing to die to save his fellow men." — Melinda Kane (10:44)
• "How you feel today is not how you're always going to feel... that grief will change to purpose if you allow it." — Melinda Kane (38:47)
• "Be grateful... to be respectful of that and to provide the support that they need always." — Melinda Kane (40:19)

Conclusion

Assemblywoman Melinda Kane's story is a testament to the resilience of military families and the profound impact of channeling personal grief into public service. Her unwavering dedication to advocating for veterans and their families underscores the silent strength that supports America’s military. Through her work, Melinda ensures that sacrifices are honored and that those who serve receive the support and recognition they deserve.

Thank you for tuning into "WETSU: A Battleship New Jersey Podcast." Join us next time as we continue to explore the untold stories and enduring legacy of the Battleship New Jersey.