What Should I Read Next?
Ep 516: Don’t Overthink Your Buddy Reads
Host: Anne Bogel
Date: March 3, 2026
Guest: Ruth Verwei
Main Theme & Purpose
In this episode, Anne Bogel connects with longtime listener Ruth Verwei, who has been living in Germany (originally from Vancouver, Canada). Ruth and her sister, separated by continents, have formed a “book club of two”—using buddy reads to stay emotionally connected. However, Ruth finds herself overthinking book selections, worrying about mutual enjoyment and conversation potential, and seeks Anne’s expertise to find titles that will bridge their distinct tastes and spark meaningful discussion.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
Ruth’s Reading Life and Buddy-Read Challenge
- Ruth describes herself as a lifelong reader and learner, now comfortably juggling print, audio, and digital books—adapting after her move to Germany where English print options were limited.
- "I love learning new things. It kind of has defined my...professional life and also my personal life." (06:46; Ruth)
- Reading together with her sister is "not really a book club…it’s very low stakes," accommodating time differences and library schedules.
- “Sometimes we don’t even read them synchronously… and that’s totally fine.” (10:46; Ruth)
- Ruth feels pressure and tends to overthink book suggestions, wanting them to fit both her and her sister.
- “I get, you know, sometimes over invested in book topics… I kind of try and bring all these aspects into a choice…rather than sometimes just spontaneously saying, oh this looks good…” (12:43; Ruth)
- Anne reassures her: "No such thing [as being overinvested]. And yet also, I think I understand what you’re talking about.” (12:10; Anne)
Books That Work for Both Sisters
1. Everything I Know About Love by Dolly Alderton
- Chosen for its humor and relatability; memoirs often work well for both.
- Dolly Alderton’s perspective on friendship and evolving relationships resonated, as did the “sisterly” aspect of the central friendship.
- "I remember us sitting…on the couch in my living room…one of us [was] rolling down onto the floor because we were laughing so hard.” (09:56; Ruth)
- “…the central relationship…is really her friendship with her childhood best friend...that was really actually representative of what it means also to be a sister.” (19:11; Ruth)
- Format matters: both enjoyed it as an audiobook, with Alderton narrating (18:00+).
2. Kakigori Summer by Emily Itami
- A character-driven, “warm-hearted” novel about three grown sisters brought together by a family crisis.
- Ruth loved the eldest sister’s perspective as an expat re-entering Japanese culture, which resonated with her own international experience.
- “It felt like a hug and when I finished the book I just like want to hug it.” (21:00; Ruth)
3. Famous Last Words by Gillian McAllister
- Both enjoy McAllister’s blend of thriller, complex character development, and family themes.
- Appreciated for combining suspenseful plot with emotional resonance around motherhood and relationships.
- “Her books have all been five stars from both of us…about the mystery, but they’re also about motherhood and marriage and being a human…” (24:00; Ruth)
- Noted that McAllister’s books are ideal for their blend of plot (“twists,” which her sister prefers) and deep character engagement (favored by Ruth).
A Book That Missed the Mark
Bear by Julia Phillips
- Both found it lacking in character motivation and emotional resonance, despite a strong setting and solid writing.
- “I didn’t have any qualms there, but…I was sort of missing some elements…not really understanding their motivation.” (26:35; Ruth)
- “The relationship between them didn’t really resonate.” (26:55; Ruth)
What They’ve Been Reading Lately (and Enjoying)
- Wild Dark Shore by Charlotte McConaghy: “Five stars from both of us” (28:29; Ruth)
- Sisters in the Wind by Angeline Boulley: Positive so far; appeals to their interest in sibling stories (28:33).
- The Ministry of Time by Kayleigh Ann Bradley: Excited to try a new genre together (29:01).
Defining Their Overlap & Tastes
- Ruth: moody, character-driven literary fiction, poetry, romance.
- Her sister: plot-driven, twisty mysteries and thrillers.
- Both enjoy emotionally resonant books, memoirs, “sad millennial girl fiction” (with humorous or ‘Fleabag’ vibes), and occasional stories featuring siblings.
- “On paper, it doesn’t sound like there’s a lot of crossover, but…” (30:30; Ruth)
- “We have tended to enjoy that [sibling stories].” (31:38; Ruth)
Anne’s Book Recommendations
1. Forgotten on Sunday by Valérie Perrin (tr. Hildegarde Serle)
- French novel, not originally in English; strong theme of found/family and sibling-style bonds.
- Spans a century, combining intricate plotting and emotional craftsmanship.
- “Strong life-giving, intergenerational relationships, really thorny, intricate family dynamics and also like lots of pain, but lots of hope to go with it.” (37:51; Anne)
- Noted for its "setup and payoff" structure, dramatic revelations, and French sensibility.
- Ruth’s response: “Honestly, it sounds amazing. I really like what you’re saying about the… big payoff… I think that is very intriguing.” (38:51; Ruth)
2. The Good Life by Virginie Grimaldi (tr. Hildegarde Serle)
- Also French in origin; a quieter sister story about estrangement, reunion, painful history, humor as coping.
- Anne: “Not as much as Perrin, but if Forgotten on Sunday works for you, that could be a good one.” (40:24; Anne)
- Ruth: “Definitely sounds like something up my alley…processing things, but coming together to do that, I think sounds really interesting.” (40:31; Ruth)
3. Trust Her by Flynn Berry
- Modern, twisty thriller set in Northern Ireland; highly discussable moral/ethical tensions, surprise resolutions, and strong depiction of sisterly bonds.
- “Barry drops you right into the middle of the action…” (41:53; Anne)
- The protagonist Tessa’s choices are deeply bracketed by loyalty to her sister.
- Also recommended: Northern Spy (same author), and—should Ruth wish to go deeper—Trespasses by Louise Kennedy for related themes.
- Ruth: “It sounds amazing… when you said the central question… that was really not where I was expecting to go… this sounds incredible, like going on the list right away.” (43:39; Ruth)
4. The Irish Goodbye by Beth Ann Fennelly
- Nonfiction “micro memoirs” and essays; explores sisterly loss, expatriate life, friendship, marriage, and middle age.
- “There are maybe a half dozen essays in here that are quite long… I love the micro memoirs for you, but also the long essays…” (46:03; Anne)
- Touching, artful, and often humorous, but with serious emotional content around the death of Fennelly’s sister.
- Ruth: “Indeed, I think it could be really interesting and work for us… the mix of the two [essay styles] is also intriguing.” (47:36; Ruth)
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
On Overthinking:
Ruth: “I do wonder sometimes if part of the problem is I overthink it because I tend to do that and also because I get, you know, sometimes over invested in book topics.” (00:00) Anne: “No such thing. And yet also I think I understand what you’re talking about.” (00:10) -
On Laughing Together:
Ruth: “I remember us sitting, like, on the couch in my living room and, like, just being one of us, like, rolling down onto the floor because we were laughing so hard.” (09:56) -
On Emotional Resonance:
Anne: “The emotional resonance I’m really hearing coming through the books you loved…” (26:35) -
On the Power of Reading Across Distance:
Anne: “I hope to recommend titles that will make for ideal sister book club picks.” (04:18) -
On Sad Millennial Girl Fiction and Fleabag Vibes:
Ruth: “Those books also really work quite well…fleabag vibes, you said, bonus points for stories featuring siblings.” (31:34) -
On “Forgotten on Sunday”:
Anne: “Her work has been praised in the original language translation… but I wonder if this combination of intricate plotting, really beautiful craftsmanship… and just like sensational fireworks in the plot is gonna work for both of you.” (35:34)
Timestamps for Important Segments
- Ruth’s Intro, Family, and Buddy Reading Concept: 04:50–13:32
- Reading Taste Overlap & Differences: 16:36–31:38
- Books That Worked: 16:53–25:26
- Book That Didn’t Work: 25:36–28:06
- Recent Reads and Reading Preferences: 28:10–34:21
- Anne’s Recommended Titles (Deep Dive): 34:55–51:24
- Ruth’s Reaction and Next Steps: 51:56–52:40
Episode Flow and Tone
Anne and Ruth’s conversation is warm, introspective, and practical—full of humor and camaraderie. Together, they explore the peculiar joys and subtle challenges of buddy reading at a distance, ultimately affirming the value of literature in sustaining emotional bonds across the miles. Anne’s recommendations flex to fit both sisters’ needs, subtly encouraging Ruth to trust her instincts and ease the pressure of “perfect” selection.
Final Thoughts
Ruth is most excited to pitch “Trust Her” by Flynn Berry as their next buddy read but will review the full list of Anne’s thoughtful selections with her sister. Anne encourages Ruth—and listeners—to embrace the joy in surprise connections and emotional resonance, rather than striving for perfection in every pick.
Relevant Episode Quotes:
- “I’m definitely going to take this whole list and talk about it with her, but I have a feeling we’re going to go with Trust Her.” (52:04; Ruth)
- “Oh, I would love that for you.” [re: overthinking less, having more fun] (30:12; Anne)
For the full list of titles and show notes, visit whatshouldireadnextpodcast.com.
