Chelsea Peretti Wants To Delete Our Podcast

Summary

What's Our Podcast? with Beck Bennett and Kyle Mooney

Episode: Chelsea Peretti
Release Date: June 24, 2026
Host: Headgum

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Episode Overview

This lively, comedic episode of “What’s Our Podcast?” features Beck Bennett and Kyle Mooney (both SNL alumni and longtime friends) figuring out what the podcast should actually be about… again! Their special guest is comedian, writer, and actress Chelsea Peretti (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, “Call Chelsea Peretti” podcast), who is invited to pitch her own idea for a recurring podcast theme. The trio riff on parenting, nostalgia, standup, music, escape rooms, and explore the hilarious possibilities of a “deletion” podcast (where you erase unwanted things from the world). With trademark bits, improv songs, and tangential conversations, this episode balances absurdity, sincerity, and sharp comic chemistry.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Patreon Launch and Show Structure

• The episode opens with Beck and Kyle excitedly announcing their new Patreon, including bonus episodes, opportunities for fans to pitch podcast ideas, exclusive chat rooms, and video content ([00:22]–[03:11]).
  • Quote:
    “We can also be earnest. Learn about each other’s lives. Yes. Catch up for longer.” — Beck Bennett ([01:04])
• Lighthearted behind-the-scenes riffs about doing live-stream Patreon events and Q&A with fans.

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2. Nostalgic Bit: Peter Pan Improv Song

• Beck and Kyle improvise an original “Peter Pan” musical number, inventing new lyrics and characters, with a mix of playful self-deprecation when they stumble musically ([09:58]–[15:25]).
  • Quote:
    “I am Peter Pan and I move like this. One foot forward and two steps back. Do the Peter Pan, do the Peter Pan!” — Beck Bennett ([11:03])

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3. Welcoming Chelsea Peretti

• Chelsea joins and immediately gets into banter about “turkey balls,” comedy food stories, and the world of passed hors d’oeuvres ([24:56]–[29:16]).
• They discuss commercial auditions, the struggle to maintain “morality” when doing ads, and share anecdotes about early gigs ([27:00]).

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4. Chelsea’s Early Viral Fame & Standup

• Chelsea shares stories behind her early web projects, like “Black People Love Us” and “The Rejection Line”—noting their status as viral sensations before viral media was even a thing ([33:40])
  • Quote:
    “We made this thing called Black People Love Us... And then we made a phone number that was called the rejection line.” — Chelsea Peretti ([33:51])
• Talks about losing her virginity at 17 (“a great age!”), with Beck and Kyle, and jokes about the awkwardness and differences in experience for men and women ([34:55]–[36:31]).

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5. Parenting and Life with Kids

• All three riff about losing the ability to ‘sleep in’ as parents, struggles with kids and iPads, and the allure of “just throwing the iPad in the LA River” ([37:07]–[40:00]).
• Digress into grievances about LA garages turning into storage units and battling rats:
  • Quote:
    “Our garages just dumpsters…everyone in LA just can’t even park in their garage.” — Chelsea Peretti ([40:53])

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6. Chelsea’s SNL and Comedy Writing Memories

• Chelsea recounts working as an SNL guest writer (for just two weeks!), interning in Lorne Michaels’ office, and how sometimes job offers/communication at SNL were hilariously ambiguous ([42:43]–[44:11]).
  • Amusing, honest reflections on feeling like an outsider (“everyone was blonde in his sphere except me, and I was like a brunette and a weirdo” ([44:44])).

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7. The “Deletion” Podcast Concept ([68:56] onward)

• Chelsea pitches a podcast called “Deletion”, where the hosts discuss what they would erase from the world and the consequences (“ramifications”).
  • Quote:
    “It’s a podcast where you talk about, like, what you might wish to delete from the world and what the ramifications would be.” — Chelsea Peretti ([69:31])
• They collectively brainstorm:
  • French fries (Chelsea’s pick: “Honestly, they’re not… like, there’s better things for me. If I have the calories on the table, I’d rather go for carbonara”—and jokes about children (Kyle’s) “dying” without fries ([80:22]–[81:10]))
  • Mashed potatoes vs. home fries: heated, funny debate on which potato dishes should survive ([81:39])
  • Desserts: Kyle dares to delete desserts, quickly vetoed as “anti-woman” by Chelsea ([82:43])
  • Cakes, cookies: more specific deletions and ramifications for birthdays ([83:21])
  • Hand dryers: Chelsea’s pick for deletion in public restrooms—“just wipe your hands on your pants!” ([89:50])
  • Parking meters: venting about privatized parking and wishing for a Los Angeles without meters ([94:00])
  • Small talk and pleasantries: all agree they’d love to “delete” polite, empty exchanges—leading to meta-reflection on social façade vs. authenticity ([97:04])

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8. Escape Room Obsession

• Chelsea raves about escape rooms (has the app “Morty”), teaches the hosts you’re not really locked in, and laments how alpha-male energy ruins the fun ([70:07]).
  • Quote:
    “Alpha males ruin everything. Like, every experience sucks when you’re with dudes who want to prove how smart they are and control everyone.” — Chelsea Peretti ([71:16])
• The trio brainstorm about doing a live episode in an escape room.

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9. Improv, Music, and Comedy Community

• They create musical bits on the fly (“Known Beck since college”), play with nostalgic improv games, and riff about their time in college improv groups ([55:01]–[79:02]).
• Share comedic gripes about the flood of unfunny podcast clips online—with Chelsea improvising a song:
  • Quote:
    “Delete this podcast... The clips aren’t funny, you’re all laughing in the clip, but the clip is not funny…” — Chelsea Peretti ([85:20])

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10. Open Talk on Standup and Creativity

• Chelsea describes her creative process, the energy exchange of live shows, and struggles with “small talk” vs. real connection—she writes many standup ideas in the shower ([64:35]–[66:40]).
• Reflections on career, venues, crowd temperature (“hot rooms are bad for comedy”), and possible fall tour plans ([68:11]).

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11. Final Bits & Show Close

• Playful roast on Beck’s use of the blow dryer, and a gross-out finale involving “chicken meatballs” that look/smell like dog food ([106:33]).
• Group sings a final playful song about their day and the episode’s theme ([107:33]):
  • Quote:
    “God, we’ve had some fun today, oh, God, we’ve had some fun... On the pod today, I came to play…” — Chelsea Peretti ([108:11])

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Podcasting and Purpose:
  “We didn’t know what it is. We still are finding out what it is every single week when we come together with our guests. And when you and I sort of mess around on the microphone…” — Beck Bennett ([00:34])
• Chelsea on early viral success:
  “We made this thing called Black People Love Us…rejection line…before viral media was a thing.” ([33:51])
• On “Deletion” concept:
  “You talk about what you might wish to delete from the world and what the ramifications would be.” — Chelsea ([69:31])
• On food deletions:
  “French fries…they’re everywhere. Your muscles react before your brain can say no. All gets fries with that. Then all of a sudden, before you know it, you’ve eaten a bunch of fries.” — Chelsea ([80:23])
• On authenticity (and small talk):
  “Small talk is a scourge…I really struggle with it…friends who can just seem so engaged…I connect with people who skip that step.” — Chelsea ([97:44])
• Meta-podcasting critique:
  “Delete this podcast. The clips aren’t funny, you’re all laughing in the clip, but the clip is not funny…” — Chelsea ([85:20])

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [00:22] Patreon tiers and perks
• [09:58] Peter Pan improv song
• [24:56] Chelsea joins, comedy food banter
• [33:40] Early viral content
• [36:27] Losing “the V” stories
• [37:07] Parenting and the curse of iPads
• [42:43] Chelsea’s SNL and Lorne Michaels anecdotes
• [68:56] Chelsea pitches “Deletion” as podcast idea
• [70:07] Escape rooms, team fun, and alpha males
• [80:22] French fry deletion & ramifications
• [82:43] Desserts, cakes, rambling food deletions
• [89:50] Bathrooms: hand dryers, bandanas, and history
• [94:00] Deleting parking meters
• [97:04] Small talk as a societal curse
• [107:33] Final musical bit & outro

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Conclusion

The episode is a chaotic but affectionate look at friendship, the creative brainstorm, the absurdities of modern life—and what happens when three distinctly funny people decide “deletion” might be the podcast theme they’ve been looking for all along. Chelsea Peretti’s quick wit and honesty fit perfectly with Beck and Kyle’s loose, playful style, producing a memorable, joke-rich exploration of what we’d all like to erase…and what we couldn’t live without.

For fans seeking:

• Absurd musical comedy and off-the-cuff bits
• Refreshing honesty about showbiz, parenting, and the comedy community
• A new “What If?”-style theme show (“Deletion”) with meta-commentary on podcasting itself

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Chelsea Plugs:

• Call Chelsea Peretti podcast
• “First Time Female Director” (film)
• Coffee-themed music album
• Instagram: @chelsanity
• Upcoming standup tour (fall 2026, maybe…)

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"Delete this podcast!" — Chelsea Peretti (singing, [85:02])

Transcript

[Kyle Mooney]

This is a Headgun podcast. Wow.

[Beck Bennett]

Yay. Another episode of what's our Podcast. But first, a little special announcement from Becky and Kyle.

[Kyle Mooney]

This is very big. This is.

[Beck Bennett]

It's very huge and big.

[Kyle Mooney]

I think this is life changing for me.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. That's the way I feel. As long as it goes well.

[Kyle Mooney]

Well, even if it doesn't, it is altering my life.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, it already has.

[Kyle Mooney]

The big announcement is we are starting a patreon.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yes.

[Beck Bennett]

You're saying to yourself, oh, yes, it was.

[Kyle Mooney]

You know, it was a risk. It was a swing to even start a podcast together back.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes, it was.

[Kyle Mooney]

We didn't know what it is. We still are finding out what it is every single week when we come together with our guests. And when you and I sort of

[Beck Bennett]

mess around on the microphone, let's tell them what it is. For the first tier, Rocco, Basic tier.

[Kyle Mooney]

It's five bucks a month. You're gonna get a bonus episode every week. No guest. Okay. It's just Beck and I doing what we've been doing Since September of 2003 when we first met each other.

[Beck Bennett]

For that tier, we have slopping out, which is just the two of us hanging out.

[Kyle Mooney]

It's like our intro to our show.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. But it's longer. We can go into bits longer.

[Kyle Mooney]

We can also be earnest. Learn about each other's lives.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes. Catch up for longer. Or we also have what's yous Podcast, where we take ideas from our Patreon members.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yes.

[Beck Bennett]

At a certain tier, at the $10 tier, which is the next tier. We take your ideas and we try that podcast out. Right, but you can pitch those ideas at the $10 tier.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yes. Once you get to the $10 tier, premium rock, which we're calling Rocco Premium.

[Beck Bennett]

Rocco Premium.

[Kyle Mooney]

That's where you actually get to pitch the ideas that we will do on our podcast. You're also gonna get access to an exclusive chat. A chat room.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yes.

[Kyle Mooney]

The Discord. The Rocco Discord, where you can talk with other fans, other listeners. Probably kind of do your own little bits. Make some friends. Maybe. Maybe you can grab. Grab dinner or coffee with one of them sometime.

[Beck Bennett]

Also with the $10 tier, you get access to. You get to see our. What we're calling our sillies. Yes.

[Kyle Mooney]

These are little videos. You know, we came up making videos together. Full circle. Because now you and I are just gonna make a little video we already started. Get a little iPhone, make a little video, play some characters, do some bits.

[Beck Bennett]

Just come up with an idea and pop it right off and just shoot it.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah. We don't need to labor over it.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, exactly. We just kind of have fun and pump it out to our Rocco's. You know what I mean?

[Kyle Mooney]

I know exactly what you mean. I love it.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes.

[Kyle Mooney]

For 15 bucks, you get all that stuff, plus you get free access to our new ticketed live stream. So, like, we will talk to you directly. You can ask us questions. We'll be doing these quarterly throughout the year.

[Beck Bennett]

We might do poppers there. We don't know yet. It's only going to be legal stuff, but we're going to have fun to do poppers. Yes. And here's the thing for Rocket supreme, if you sign up for a full year, you'll get a side headshot of me and Kyle. We don't know, but it's going to be an amazing family heirloom that you get and you can, you know, frame it and put above the fireplace or something or something like that.

[Kyle Mooney]

It is really going to be fun. I think it's going to be a place to see some really weird, wild and crazy stuff where we just get

[Beck Bennett]

to do whatever we want without really caring. So. Yeah. So go to patreon.com what's our podcast and join today, please.

[Kyle Mooney]

That's patreon.com what's our Podcast? And be in the Rocco Club with all your fellow Roccos. Dude, guess what?

[Beck Bennett]

Pile. What's up, man? It's back. What's going on, dude?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Hey.

[Kyle Mooney]

Not much, brother. Just hanging, hanging out and getting excited for the big. For the big day next week. Did you hear about it?

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, no. What's going on?

[Kyle Mooney]

The guys from what's our podcast, which is Beck, Ben and Kyle Mooney, are doing a lives.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Are doing a live.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Are doing a live. Are doing a live stream episode. So that means that we're going to invite all, all, all of our friends who listen to watch to come hang. Hang with us and do. We'll do an episode for them and it's live streamed.

[Beck Bennett]

The Patreon friends. If you're on Patreon, if you are paid, friends are friends from Patreon.

[Kyle Mooney]

Exactly.

[Beck Bennett]

It's gonna be not on Patreon. You can't see it. You can't be a part of it.

[Kyle Mooney]

So. So if you're not on Patreon yet, you better join or else you're gonna be right. Everybody else is gonna be talking about the fun live stream with the what's our Podcast guys? And you'll be like, oh, my God, I missed it. What am I doing with my Life. Oh, I should take a hammer and hammer out.

[Beck Bennett]

Go to town.

[Kyle Mooney]

Go to town.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay.

[Kyle Mooney]

But yeah, the live stream is going to be next Tuesday, June 23rd at 3pm PT, 6pm ET. All you got to do is join

[Beck Bennett]

Pacific time or Eastern time for the. Sorry.

[Kyle Mooney]

It's okay. I know that, like, I'm sort of the guy who like, kind of has to be like, oh, wait, we got

[Beck Bennett]

to make sure we do the promo.

[Kyle Mooney]

And you're sort of the guy who's like, I'm just gonna around the whole time. I get it.

[Beck Bennett]

That's actually not. That's actually not the goal and intent.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay.

[Beck Bennett]

I was trying my best. I was trying to, like, just support and show up and just like, make sure people understood that ET stands for Eastern time and PT stands for Pacific time. Okay.

[Kyle Mooney]

I appreciate it.

[Beck Bennett]

Sorry that I. I was doing due diligence.

[Kyle Mooney]

Sorry that I misjudged you.

[Beck Bennett]

It's okay. I'm just trying to make sure everybody has all the information and then they can make their. The best calls once they have the information.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay, well, come join us on Tuesday. We'll be doing some bits. We'll be maybe making some music. Maybe I'll show you some videos. Beck, it's gonna be. It's gonna be our first time doing a. Doing a live show for our, our friends on the Internet. So who knows?

[Beck Bennett]

Maybe I'll cook something.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay.

[Beck Bennett]

I don't know. It just came up. I don't know.

[Kyle Mooney]

I like it. I like it. Maybe I'll.

[Beck Bennett]

Maybe you can finally wrestle in front of our friends.

[Kyle Mooney]

I would like that.

[Beck Bennett]

I would, too. Old school style.

[Kyle Mooney]

Well, join the Patreon. We'll see you next week. Tuesday, June 23rd at 3:00pm Eastern Time, Pacific Time.

[Beck Bennett]

Shit.

[Kyle Mooney]

Pacific Time or 6:00pm Eastern Time.

[Beck Bennett]

And prepare. It's going to be the live event of the century. You've never seen anything like it. It's going to be just as awesome as Donald Trump's UFC birthday party. You're listening to this podcast, so I know you've got a curious mind. Here's a helpful fact you might not know yet. Drivers who switch and save with Progressives save over $900 on average. Pop over to progressive.com, answer some questions, and you'll get a quick quote with discounts that are easy to come by. In fact, 99% of their auto customers earn at least one discount. Visit progressive.com and see if you can enjoy a little cash back. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. National average 12 month savings of $946 by new customers surveyed who saved with Progressive between June 2024 and May 2025. Potential savings will vary. What's our podcast? What's it gonna be all about? Tell us what's our podcast. What should we talk about with Beck and Kyle? Oh, my God. Wow. Oh, no.

[Kyle Mooney]

We're starting. Rochelle's tinkering away.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes.

[Kyle Mooney]

Like the mad,

[Beck Bennett]

mad scion.

[Kyle Mooney]

Mad scion. She is.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes. Well, if you're watching right now and if you're listening, this is what's our podcast.

[Kyle Mooney]

We are gone. We are no longer here.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes, we are gone.

[Kyle Mooney]

If you're watching this videotape or listening to this episode.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, we're not.

[Kyle Mooney]

We have less left. This left your ball of energy.

[Beck Bennett]

Your.

[Kyle Mooney]

Your planet. And we are. We have. We have.

[Beck Bennett]

We have sailed on Into. Into. We are into the Netherlands. We are speaking to you from the afterlife. No, just kidding. That'd be awkward.

[Kyle Mooney]

That would be nice, though, if we kind of leave everybody with a podcast after we pass.

[Beck Bennett]

That would be really nice. Yeah. Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Rochelle, can we schedule that? Can we do, like, one episode we just record randomly that after both of us pass or after just one of us?

[Beck Bennett]

I think both of us.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay, so after we would like to do. How. How long should this episode be?

[Beck Bennett]

Three hours. We can get, like, everything off our chest and just, like, lay everything out and. And then it'll be sitting there, you know, for us to release once we have both passed.

[Kyle Mooney]

Great.

[Beck Bennett]

That we can get that on the books.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Thank you, Rochelle. Thank you.

[Kyle Mooney]

Now I'm. Now I'm all curious, like, what do you have to get off your chest? What's been bothering you?

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, just, like. Just like, what I really think about me. You and all different types of, like, you know, people and the government and, like.

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, so you have a lot.

[Beck Bennett]

Well, this is actually way, like.

[Kyle Mooney]

But these are things you don't want to say. Just right in, like, an episode we'd put out next week or something, because you feel like you're like. It's. They're not popular opinions.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. And it's, like, negative and, like, technically bad.

[Kyle Mooney]

So you. But you. So you can you have the perspective to think or know that it's bad?

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Interesting.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. No.

[Kyle Mooney]

Give us.

[Beck Bennett]

No. Okay. No. Come on. For the list, for the listeners, viewers. No, I. I only think good thoughts. No. And I'm not gonna die. Who are you?

[Kyle Mooney]

Peter Pan? Tinkerbell?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, maybe sometimes.

[Kyle Mooney]

Whoa.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes. I am Peter Pan, bro. We brought a little. Maybe a new song for Peter Pan. Maybe Peter Pan's coming Back to Broadway.

[Kyle Mooney]

And it's like a new song for Peter Pan. I like that.

[Beck Bennett]

And it's like. And he just met Wendy and little John or whatever their names are in the nursery.

[Kyle Mooney]

It is little. Yeah, I think It's Little John Jr.

[Beck Bennett]

Little John and Michael.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yo, sorry I screwed up.

[Beck Bennett]

It's all good. Yo, check me out now.

[Kyle Mooney]

Hey, what happened? Oh, I wasn't recording.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, it's all good,

[Kyle Mooney]

dude.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, no, it's okay. We all make mistakes sometimes. We all make mistakes sometimes. You just gotta pick yourself up again and keep on trying again. Yes, we all make mistakes sometimes. Yes, we all blow it big sometimes. Don't.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay, I'm just gonna, like. There's no. I'm going raw, Styles.

[Beck Bennett]

Raw Dog it.

[Kyle Mooney]

Here we go. Dee dee dee.

[Beck Bennett]

Yo, check me out. I'm Peter Pan? I'm flying through the sky? I'm wearing green. I've got this.

[Kyle Mooney]

Why am I so bad at this?

[Beck Bennett]

I hang out with the lost boys all day and we play tricks on the pirates?

[Kyle Mooney]

Hey, hey, don't you do definitely giving like fergalicious beccalicious.

[Beck Bennett]

I am Peter Pan and I move like this? One foot forward and two steps back? Do the Peter Pan, do the Peter Pan? Do the Peter Pan, do the Peter Pan?

[Kyle Mooney]

I am Peter. I am Peter Pan and I need my pixie dust? If you don't give it to me, you must trust me? I will fly to never, never, never see you again?

[Beck Bennett]

I'm hanging out with the with my friends? With my friends?

[Kyle Mooney]

I am Peter Pan and I never never land? Never, never, never, never see you again?

[Beck Bennett]

I live in Neverland? Cause I fly in the sky? And if I had my way I would never land? And yeah, I've got my own peace peanut butter. I eat it all day like my father?

[Kyle Mooney]

I am Peter the most annoying

[Chelsea Peretti]

comes

[Beck Bennett]

in like these three kids in a nursery and he's like, hey, I am Peter Pan and I've lost my shadow. I left it in your drawer when your mom came in with a paddle. She scared me away and I lost my shadow. Now me tink our back, Will you sew it on my foot? I'm Peter Pan, don't you know I am a ham?

[Kyle Mooney]

I'm Peter Pan.

[Beck Bennett]

And I can do this. Wah, wah wah wah wah wah wah wah. And then they're all like, I don't know if I want to fly away with this guy. Don't you want to go where you never grow up?

[Kyle Mooney]

And the lost boys don't ever show up? I'm Peter Pan?

[Beck Bennett]

We're the Lost boys. Parents. They never show up. Yes, because they don't have any parents. You're a young girl. Would you like to be our mom? We're looking for a mom. Cause we don't have any parents. Wow.

[Kyle Mooney]

I am Peter Pan and I wear my green. I like to fly around the clouds. You see, I was a little boy and I'm still little now. And if you don't like that, me and Tink will fly around.

[Beck Bennett]

Fly, fly, fly, fly, fly, fly around.

[Kyle Mooney]

Wendy is the girl that I always love. Like I visit her house when I fly at night. I see her little brothers and I say hello. And n. I pe. Pe Mip is yellow. Peter Pan, he's Peterlicious.

[Beck Bennett]

I like to Pete, Pete, Peter all day long. I like to Pete, Pete, Peter come along, yeah, your brothers can come. If you are my girl, you can live with me and we can do the girdle.

[Kyle Mooney]

Captain Hook is a very mean man.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's coming from me.

[Kyle Mooney]

A little boy named Peter Pan.

[Beck Bennett]

And that's right. He lost one of his hands because of Peter Pan, the crocodile ape.

[Kyle Mooney]

That song is so bad. Smee is my buddy. He like Captain Hook. He don't have hair, he'll leave me a shook. He's got a nice little belly and he runs around the ship. Oh, little Smee, let's see you do a dip.

[Beck Bennett]

Dip, dip, dip, dip.

[Kyle Mooney]

He dips and dances all around. He shakes because Smee's getting down. He's got a denim chapter and little legs now. Come on, Smee, dance with me.

[Beck Bennett]

Bom bom, bom. Boogie, boogie, boogie, boogie, boogie, boogie, boogie, boogie, boogie. Wow. Well, welcome to what Kind of have

[Kyle Mooney]

the choice to immediately fast forward through any of that. I made some mistakes.

[Beck Bennett]

We all made mistakes.

[Kyle Mooney]

The music was bad. The music was fully off.

[Beck Bennett]

I think that was great. I mean, I think. I honestly think that with music like that. Do a new Peter Pan. We're going.

[Chelsea Peretti]

We.

[Beck Bennett]

We take a. We take like a. A Titanic, right? What's it called? Oh, hello. Oh, Mary. You know, we can have like a. We could just redo Peter Pan. Peter Pan, Peter Pan. And it's going to be huge for

[Kyle Mooney]

a kind of like, kind of. Yeah. New danceable Peter Pan.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's kind of like maybe a little delicious. Maybe a little R rated here or there.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, Well, I did the PP stuff.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Yeah, that's. I guess that's PG13, but that was great. Yeah. We have a great guest this week, by the way.

[Kyle Mooney]

This is what's our podcast with Beck, Ben and Kyle Mooney, where we have a guest come in to pitch us their idea for what they think our podcast should be about.

[Beck Bennett]

That's right. That's right. And this week we have the incredible Chelsea Peretti.

[Kyle Mooney]

She's done it all.

[Beck Bennett]

She's done it all. She's so funny. Incredible Stand up. Incredible, Incredible actor on Brooklyn 99 and Crow show and many other things. She's. She's somebody who. I got to be honest, I mean, like, she's of that, like, group of people that was, like, just ahead of us kind of.

[Kyle Mooney]

Sure.

[Beck Bennett]

And she's very intimidating to me.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, well, I think funny, smart people are typically intimidating. Yeah, Well, I think we're. I mean, I think we're gonna have a great time. And the thing is, we're in it together. And when I say we, I don't just mean you and I back.

[Beck Bennett]

Who.

[Kyle Mooney]

When we've known each other, obviously, for a decent amount of time.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, I think since. Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

But I also mean Rochelle, who's back there, who I trust and who always crushes it and is there for support.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. She's become an absolute warrior of the pod.

[Kyle Mooney]

And she's an ally.

[Beck Bennett]

She's an ally for us. For us, for guys like us. And, you know. No, but honestly, people always talk about allies that aren't. They aren't straight white guys. And we need allies, too.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yes.

[Beck Bennett]

I'm actually. And just so everybody knows, I am joking.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay. Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

But I do think the idea of it is funny. And, you know, it's.

[Kyle Mooney]

We do sometimes say serious things on here.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

But not. Not very often.

[Beck Bennett]

Not as much as we used to.

[Kyle Mooney]

It's usually. There's usually a. Some sort of. Some sort of satirical bend.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, we're saying it ironically usually, but. But yeah, I'm excited to sit down with Chelsea. I've not never sat down with her before. Is there. I do. I do.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

You got a question for me? You got a.

[Beck Bennett]

No, I actually don't. But just like, I just.

[Kyle Mooney]

You want to sort of, like, kind of figure out the attack, like, kind of.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, well, I was. That's funny you say that. I just don't. I hope she doesn't attack us.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay.

[Beck Bennett]

And if she. And if she attacks one of us, we got to help each other out. Okay. If. If she attacks one. If she attacks you, I will go right at her. And if she text me, you go right How? I don't like the language I'm using.

[Kyle Mooney]

It's not the language. It's that you're so like, assured about the idea. I, like, I love that you're defending. You're going to be defending me, but I don't love the idea that you're ready to attack immediately.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay.

[Kyle Mooney]

It just makes me a little nervous.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay. Do you want me. Should I lie and say that I'm not going to be ready to attack?

[Kyle Mooney]

It's not a matter of, like, just. Yeah, you don't. I don't want you to just lie and say, like, huh, I'm not going to attack her. I want it more. I. I feel, like, more comfortable if you just, like, sort of. I thought about those thoughts and, and maybe marinated in them before, like, react, you know, acting on them, if that makes sense.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Okay.

[Kyle Mooney]

Agree to disagree.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, no, I just. I don't know. I don't know. I. I will do my best. Do you have any. Do you have any, like. Like, drugs that might help me?

[Kyle Mooney]

Do you have any drugs that might help you? I'm not on me, but I'm trying to think.

[Beck Bennett]

Well, we'll see what happens. Hopefully, I. I will relax.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, I think it'd be great.

[Beck Bennett]

We're pumping out material like crazy between Patreon and the main stuff.

[Kyle Mooney]

I see you so much.

[Beck Bennett]

I know, it's crazy. I think we have to, like, dial that back a little bit, but we'll see. We don't know. We'll have to find out.

[Kyle Mooney]

I was enjoying it. I was.

[Beck Bennett]

I'm. Dude, I. Come on. I was joking around.

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, I see. This is like, I never. Cuz, like, because podcast, it's like, it dips out of seriousness. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

We never.

[Kyle Mooney]

I was like, oh, he's not loving it.

[Beck Bennett]

No, no. I'm having a great time, honestly, sitting here with you today, coming up with two original songs. One about Peter Pan.

[Kyle Mooney]

We got one in the. In the Patreon.

[Beck Bennett]

I see somebody coming to the door. I think it's time. You guys, this is Chelsea Peretti. Let's go. What's up? I see you through the window.

[Kyle Mooney]

This podcast is brought to you by Lisa Mattresses. Yay. And the crowd goes wild. Lisa Mattresses, I gotta ask you. I gotta ask you. Yeah, yeah. Dude, I never knew a mattress could be as great as you. How did you do it?

[Beck Bennett]

I'm made of all sorts of different materials depending on what you're looking for with your sleep. And you can totally adjust me to all your needs.

[Kyle Mooney]

Wow, Lisa. Well, we're such great fans. By the way, what are you wearing here today?

[Beck Bennett]

I'm wearing a fitted sheet and a top Sheet and a duvet.

[Kyle Mooney]

Well, it looks great and we can't wait to see you again. Once again, congrats on all the great work.

[Beck Bennett]

Thank you. Wow. I can't believe we got that exclusive interview with Lisa mattresses. But look, like a lot of families, our nighttime routine revolves around getting everyone settled and ready for the next day. Me and Kyle live in the same house. We have kids and we have w. It's. It's crazy. Once my kid is asleep or our kids are asleep, that quiet moment to rest and recharge really matters to me. With my reserve hybrid mattress, I'm just relaxing.

[Kyle Mooney]

I feel the same way about my chill legend mattress.

[Beck Bennett]

That and that name alone makes me want to get the mattress. Well, look, these are from Lisa. And my bed feels like a sleep sanctuary.

[Kyle Mooney]

Reminds me of Lisa Simpson.

[Beck Bennett]

Remember her? Yeah, but she's not a mattress, okay? I fall asleep faster, stay asleep longer, and wake up feeling truly rested, which has made my busy mornings much smoother.

[Kyle Mooney]

She plays the sax, I believe.

[Beck Bennett]

Not a mattress.

[Kyle Mooney]

Lisa mattresses are meticulously designed and assembled in the USA for exceptional quality. And they back it all up.

[Beck Bennett]

Back it up, back it up.

[Kyle Mooney]

You look good. I want you back.

[Beck Bennett]

They back it up with free shipping, easy returns and 120 night sleep.

[Kyle Mooney]

Lisa has been awarded best hybrid and best memory foam mattresses by New York Times wire cutters by West Elm as their go to mattress partner. Lisa isn't just about sleep. It's about impact. They work with local nonprofits across the US who donate thousands of mattresses each year to families in need. With over 43,000 mattresses donated a date. That's amaz. That's awesome.

[Beck Bennett]

That's really amazing. That's awesome. Look, Lisa's committed to eco friendly materials and sustainable manufacturing practices and partners with organizations like Clean Hub and Green Worms.

[Kyle Mooney]

They help remove harmful plastic waste from

[Beck Bennett]

the environment, which is important.

[Kyle Mooney]

Go to Lisa.com for 30 off select mattresses plus get an extra 50 off with promo code Beg and Kyle. Exclusive to our listeners. That's L EE E S a.com promo

[Beck Bennett]

code Beck Kyle for 30% off select

[Kyle Mooney]

mattresses plus an extra 50 up supporter show. Let them know we sent you after checkout.

[Beck Bennett]

Green webs Lisa.com promo code beckand Kyle. I could just sit here and watch that all day. Green. Hi, I'm Beck Bennett.

[Kyle Mooney]

I thought I was Beck Bennett.

[Beck Bennett]

No, no, no, no.

[Kyle Mooney]

Kyle Mooney.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes. Sorry about that. Exactly. No, all good. All good.

[Kyle Mooney]

Thanks, buddy.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. And we host the show what's our podcast here on Headgum.

[Kyle Mooney]

This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and make you look like a kick ass person online.

[Beck Bennett]

Like you skateboarding through the Internet or you're like you're surfing through the web.

[Kyle Mooney]

Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings with a professional website, grow your brand and get paid all in one place.

[Beck Bennett]

I like that it's all in one place. I don't, I like that I don't have to go around, you know, like different stores or something.

[Kyle Mooney]

It's just, well, it's like, oh, do I need to go to like, do I need another type of website to like find the right pictures or like another type of website to upload?

[Beck Bennett]

You know, it's all in one place.

[Kyle Mooney]

The video or audio or like. No, I want it makes it easy. Make it easy on me, please.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes. And you can do all those things. Photos, videos, changing fonts, you know, I mean, the designs are amazing. They're catering to all your different needs. There are SEO tools which. I know what those are. And their custom domains.

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, let's come up with a domain right now. Let's see. I wonder if it exists.

[Beck Bennett]

Www.friends meeting friends.

[Kyle Mooney]

Friends meeting friends.com that's an original thing

[Beck Bennett]

that we came up with. Friends meeting friends. Anyway, so check out squarespace.com headgum for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, use offer code headgum to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Hell, sounds easy. Anybody could do it. Support for this podcast comes from Progressive, America's number one motorcycle insurer.

[Kyle Mooney]

Did you know writers who switch and

[Beck Bennett]

save with Progressive save nearly $200 per year. That's a whole new pair of writing gloves.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And more.

[Beck Bennett]

Quote Today, Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates national average 12 month savings of $197 by new customers surveyed who saved

[Kyle Mooney]

with Progressive between October 2024 and September 2025. Potential savings will vary.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Turkey ball.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, I actually decided to leave these out on purpose.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's brilliant.

[Beck Bennett]

Chicken meatballs from Equinox.

[Chelsea Peretti]

We can get a good 40 minutes out of that.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, yeah. And if you want to try, they don't look very good.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, I don't.

[Beck Bennett]

But you don't want to try.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, thanks.

[Kyle Mooney]

I do.

[Beck Bennett]

Like, this would be a great clip. Will you just eat these?

[Chelsea Peretti]

No.

[Kyle Mooney]

Turkey ball is so less appetizing sounding than turkey meatball.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, Turkey balls takes it. Cuts it right down to size.

[Beck Bennett]

Kyle often talks about food Food. And as. As far as, like, fried balls.

[Kyle Mooney]

That's like.

[Beck Bennett]

I would say that's probably one orangeini kind of. Yeah, yeah. Like a croquet.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

You know? Yeah. Past app.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Past apps, for sure.

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, I've got a past app story.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, I told you.

[Kyle Mooney]

Actually, maybe I put this on record already.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, maybe the. Was it about the spring?

[Chelsea Peretti]

You don't repeat it.

[Beck Bennett]

About the spring roll box.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, the cater.

[Beck Bennett]

The crater.

[Kyle Mooney]

The crate.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It was like a crater is a different.

[Kyle Mooney]

It was a crate.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Create craters all over Los Angeles.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, maybe that'.

[Kyle Mooney]

That was kind of like a cool little rhyme, too. Create craters.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Create craters.

[Beck Bennett]

Great.

[Kyle Mooney]

It was a. I got a spring roll. I said this on record.

[Beck Bennett]

I. Yeah, yeah. Remember this?

[Kyle Mooney]

Was there a guest around?

[Beck Bennett]

I think it was an intro or.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It doesn't matter. He could retell it.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, you can retell.

[Kyle Mooney]

I'm talk.

[Beck Bennett]

It's an amazing story.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay. He's, like, moving, like, trying to get around. Like, I'm, like, awkward or something. Come on. It's actually a good way to get to know the host.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

The guest. What the hell

[Chelsea Peretti]

helps you get to know me? What world are we living in?

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay, so I made one mistake. It's gonna. It's gonna. It's good. It's gonna get good from here.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay. Okay.

[Kyle Mooney]

Anyway, the spring roll. That's like a Sprite commercial.

[Beck Bennett]

That's refreshing.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I used to do commercial work.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, yeah? Not anymore.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Do I look like I'd be in a commercial in the deep background?

[Beck Bennett]

No, right in the front. Right in front of the camera. Right.

[Kyle Mooney]

We were actually just talking about that. You'd be great in commercials.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's weird. We were like.

[Beck Bennett]

We were like. We were talking about you, but we were like, she's so funny. She should do commercials.

[Kyle Mooney]

Lots of commercials.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You know that I actually met a commercial agent in New York, like, a thousand years ago, and I was like, this is the epitome of my entire headspace in life is like, I was, like, so tortured. Like, I wouldn't do a McDonald's commercial. And I'm like, telling the commercial agent, like, I just don't think I could do a McDonald's commercial. And they're like, thanks so much. Like, just like.

[Beck Bennett]

Like, I'm trying to have, like, a

[Chelsea Peretti]

moral through line and commercial work.

[Kyle Mooney]

They're like, because, like, it's so corporate or.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't know why. I just was like, I don't want to.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Promote those fries.

[Kyle Mooney]

How do you feel?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I regret telling that story. I think yours might have been A little better.

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, you want to hear this? The spring roll story?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay, let's. Let's get into it. Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay.

[Beck Bennett]

I was with past apps.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

And one of the trays being carried around was a tray of spring rolls, and they were in little wooden crates.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Cool.

[Kyle Mooney]

And so.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, that's a nice touch.

[Beck Bennett]

Nice touch. But until you hear this.

[Chelsea Peretti]

This is a classy event, by the way.

[Kyle Mooney]

So I grab. I grab one and I take spring roll and I eat it, and I'm left with this little tiny wooden crate that is like. It looks.

[Beck Bennett]

It looks nice.

[Kyle Mooney]

It looks like they put some care into this. It's not like a piece, you know? And I'm like, what do I do with this? And I see one of the tray carriers coming around with the spring roll

[Beck Bennett]

with the spring rails. Okay. So this is a tray with the spring barrels. Really? He's not collecting, like, empty glasses, but he does.

[Kyle Mooney]

But there is space on the. There's empty space.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Discard some trash onto that. That empty space. If you were gauche.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, if you're gauche.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay, well, just give me one chance here.

[Beck Bennett]

I'll see what happens.

[Chelsea Peretti]

All right.

[Kyle Mooney]

His tray was not full. There was space for. Anyway, so here's what I say. I say to him, hey, is it. Do you mind if I put the.

[Beck Bennett]

The.

[Kyle Mooney]

The crate here?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

And he says, I'd rather you not.

[Beck Bennett]

And then. And then you didn't.

[Kyle Mooney]

And then I didn't. And I threw it in the trash. But I felt so bad. It felt wasteful to get rid of this little tiny.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Taking it home to your kid.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. That could have been a little toy idea. Well, next time. Next.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Make a little mouse bed.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Next day, like, just collect all the mouse bed. Yeah. Collect all the stuff from. From the caterers and bring it home for. For your child.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. Caterer trash. Do you do that in little muffin wrappers?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Little napkins and, like, little dirty, greasy bamboo toothpicks with the little colorful plastic at the end. Yeah. Yeah. That's really fun.

[Kyle Mooney]

Really pretty.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. Or the looped bamboo.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

You know what I'm talking about. It's great to have you here.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, my gosh.

[Beck Bennett]

I love your pants.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I was truly excited. Thank you. They're a little hemmed, a little short. You're seeing a little more than I was. I was hoping for. Whatever. Whatever. But I'm really into these slides. They're hoka, I think.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay, great.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You're going to change your life. You get these Hoka slides. Commercial work.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You get these Hoka slides. You're going to be sliding through life.

[Beck Bennett]

I've never had a pair of slides I need.

[Chelsea Peretti]

They're honestly a complete game changer.

[Kyle Mooney]

I believe that.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

I mean, I guess I got the boat shoes, which are like.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Those are great, too.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

For this age.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. I like to slip into a show. I've got Crocs, I've got the boat shoes. I've got Vans. What else do I have to do?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Commercial work?

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Pretty much exclusively now.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's kind of the thing in a JCPenney's. Like, as a JCPenney's dad.

[Beck Bennett]

Thank you. Thank you. I mean, yeah, JCPenney, if you want to cast me, I would love to.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I wasn't meaning to roast you that hard, but that came out, like, as. As far. Full roast.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. No, no, I don't. I actually don't think it's a roast. I actually think it's pretty nice. I think, like, I love J.C. penny. I think those guys are pretty cool. Yeah, you got.

[Kyle Mooney]

You do have a great look back.

[Beck Bennett]

Thank you.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. I mean, it's the goatees a little different for me.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's switching. It's dark.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, It's. It's the way my. It's. It's just the way it grows in. I can't grow a full beard.

[Kyle Mooney]

Is this for a part?

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's for a part beard.

[Beck Bennett]

It's for. Is that nice, dude, dude, that she's rich. I'm feeling. I'm feeling my. I'm on fire.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You know what? Sometimes I just flip straight into roast mode.

[Beck Bennett]

And I don't even mean to.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I mean, I emanate love to both of you. Truly.

[Beck Bennett]

And. Wait, what was that last part you said emanate love? You emanate love. I can feel it.

[Kyle Mooney]

Love.

[Beck Bennett]

I. We have so much love for you. I did say when we were talking about you a little bit before you came in, that, you know, especially back in the. Back in the day a little bit when we're all coming up, I was very intimidated by it.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Okay, good. I was hoping you might say that.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Okay, great. Do you. Do people. Do people say that?

[Chelsea Peretti]

They do. They do. Yeah. I don't know. Like, part of me likes it and

[Beck Bennett]

a part of me doesn't, but it's, you know, it's. It's. And Kyle said smart, funny people are often intimidated.

[Chelsea Peretti]

But I truly have to say, like, I am, like, also, aside from being, like, a cutting, harsh person, I'm also, like, very earnest in a certain way. I was really Excited to do this because you guys are so funny. And I was watching the clips, like, literally cracking up. I'm like, when do you ever crack up to podcast clips?

[Beck Bennett]

Rare, Rare. Thank you. Yeah, man. Yes.

[Kyle Mooney]

Well, you make us laugh all the time. I was listening to one, some standup clip on the way here, and I

[Chelsea Peretti]

like how we both crammed for this. I know exactly this big meeting.

[Beck Bennett]

What really hit me, I knew who you were before 10 minutes ago. Tyla Mooney and you.

[Kyle Mooney]

But it really hit me this one line you said, I'm sorry, this is probably from 15 years ago.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's fine.

[Kyle Mooney]

But it was you talking about what you want your funeral to be. And it was like, you want it to be a stand up open mic.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, yeah, that's really old. I don't know where you saw that or heard that.

[Kyle Mooney]

I think it was like a Comedy Central. YouTube.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, that sounds.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Is that still true? I was like, I had an open mic.

[Beck Bennett]

The joke.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Because I literally believed you were asking me. I'm like, the joke. No, like, the joke was a bit. The punchline was like stuck. Cause I'd love to be dead for that. That was the punchline. But also I used to have a bit about a lot of death stuff in my humor, but, like, about wanting to have open casket. Is this in this where it's like, I wanted rosy cheeks and like curly hair and little spectacles.

[Kyle Mooney]

No, that was not in there. But that's. Oh, but like, we should, like, kind of have one of our. One of our fans cut that together and put them right next to each other.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, yeah. If you want to give permission to one of our fans, like do a

[Chelsea Peretti]

little open cast, I grant permission for you to cut that together.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, yeah, that would be great. Let's go viral with that one.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That would be amazing. I always wanted to go viral.

[Kyle Mooney]

Have you not gone viral yet?

[Beck Bennett]

You must have.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't know. Yeah, no, I did. Yeah, I did. But I, you know, early on, early on, me and my brother did a couple viral things together.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, really? What'd you do? Like YouTube?

[Chelsea Peretti]

We made this thing called Black People Love Us that was like making fun of, like, white people. And then we made a call, a phone number that was called the rejection line. And you would give it out if someone was hitting on you and it would send them to a phone tree of, like, rejection messages.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, that's cool.

[Chelsea Peretti]

But this was like a long time. It was actually before viral media was like a thing a little bit. So kind of a deep cut and kind of early.

[Beck Bennett]

You're a pioneer.

[Kyle Mooney]

Do you think that the. Was the rejection line? Do you think it was used genuinely by people or how many people were

[Chelsea Peretti]

like, oh, yeah, no, we did, because we could check the messages and be like angry guys and stuff.

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, that's right.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Was it always guys?

[Chelsea Peretti]

I mean, that's what I remember, but yeah. Because I feel like guys are the ones who ask for numbers all the time.

[Kyle Mooney]

Right?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Right.

[Kyle Mooney]

I never had that. Right.

[Beck Bennett]

I. I honestly was like, I was. I was a real late bloomer. I like, I could not. I like.

[Chelsea Peretti]

When did you lose that V?

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, here we go.

[Chelsea Peretti]

What time of day?

[Beck Bennett]

I was. I was 17, I think.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Me too.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Nice, dude. Yes, dude. What about you, Kyle?

[Kyle Mooney]

I think I'm 17 as well.

[Beck Bennett]

Wow.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's a great age, by the way. Hey, if you're thinking about it and you're 16. Wait a year.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, wait a year. It's the perfect year. You're like, you feel good. You're making. You're making the choice yourself.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

It's not being made for you.

[Kyle Mooney]

I just remember being like, whoa, here we go.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And then, like, never ending.

[Kyle Mooney]

Working sort of.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

The issues that came after, like, mentally

[Beck Bennett]

for me, but yeah, yeah, yeah. What now it is. That is typically. That is the. That is the reaction for guys. Like, whoa, that's awesome. That was so quick.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Cannot believe what. What just happened. But for girls, it's. It. It's not. It's not usually the same thing. And you don't have to comment on that. We don't actually have to go into what that's like for girls. But.

[Kyle Mooney]

What.

[Chelsea Peretti]

What losing your V is.

[Beck Bennett]

Your V is like. Yeah. Like, would you say it's like, I don't know, random? Or is it random or awkward or Is it cool?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Was it cool?

[Kyle Mooney]

Chelsea's just, like, clarifying a lot here.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I feel like, was it cool to lose your virginity as a girl? Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah. Are you stupid?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, no, no. I thought it was gonna be random. Them are awkward and you're going to be like, what the hell was that? But no, but it was cool.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It was. Mine was kind of hot.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, w. Yeah, that's great.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It was kind of good.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay, cool. You were up.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You immediately got so uncomfortable, woman. Just being fully sexual. You're like, cool.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, no, I'm cool with that.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Great. That's great.

[Beck Bennett]

Would you like me to ask you more about that?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. Ten questions about losing your V. No,

[Beck Bennett]

but it was up in the bay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

In the bay. It was In a closet at the time.

[Beck Bennett]

No way.

[Chelsea Peretti]

For. Yeah. I had not standing, though. Like, I had dragged my bed into my closet so I could sleep late.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, cool. So, like, really cool.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Like, I miss. So hard being a teenager and sleeping that late. Like, till noon.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, yeah, we're talking about.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I get up so early now. Like 5, sometimes 6:30.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. We all have kids now.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You have a kid, you know, you go to bed early and you wake up early and you get that amazing, incredible.

[Kyle Mooney]

And I've got to ask this question.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, you have to.

[Kyle Mooney]

I'm curious because, like, this is something. As a new dad.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Sometimes I'm in the situation where I can sleep in. Like, I've gotten the opportunity to, like, go somewhere. Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, yeah. Okay.

[Kyle Mooney]

Like a job or. Oh, and I can't do it.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I can't do it. I have that. I know. Like clockwork. I'm up. It's. No.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Even before I had a kid, like with Brooklyn Nine nine, I had early call times. I couldn't sleep late on my off days. Like, once my body is used to that.

[Beck Bennett]

You can't. You can't.

[Kyle Mooney]

And you are legendary on that show, by the way.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Thanks.

[Kyle Mooney]

I noticed that the. That your character's name sort of rhymes a little bit with your real name.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, my God.

[Beck Bennett]

What the hell?

[Chelsea Peretti]

I actually never put two and two together with that. Oh, that's weird.

[Beck Bennett]

Did it. Did you not put two and two together with that? Come on.

[Kyle Mooney]

I don't know.

[Beck Bennett]

I didn't.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's crazy, dude. Linetti and Peretti actually do rhyme kind of.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, yeah, I guess they kind of do.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't.

[Kyle Mooney]

You still don't trust.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No. That's weird, man. That's trippy, dude.

[Kyle Mooney]

I can't.

[Beck Bennett]

How old. How old is your child?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Eight.

[Beck Bennett]

Eight.

[Kyle Mooney]

Nice.

[Beck Bennett]

Wow. Okay. D1 81.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

D1 division.

[Beck Bennett]

One division. One eight year old. And is it. What. What's what's like the. The new thing that you're dealing with. With having.

[Chelsea Peretti]

With my child.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. With like. What's the new

[Chelsea Peretti]

God, Let me think.

[Kyle Mooney]

Electronic, of course. And they're all obsessed with screens.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, my God, you nailed it.

[Beck Bennett]

I mean, is that the thing? Are kids getting.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Can I get on my iPad? How about this? Break the iPad on my knee, throw it into the LA river.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

How about that? So cool.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay, so that's a good parenting.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Like, break it and throw it into the LA River.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. And I have them watch as each piece descends into the river. Wow.

[Beck Bennett]

See, that's like something I need to

[Chelsea Peretti]

Do I had an egret on the head.

[Beck Bennett]

An egret with half.

[Kyle Mooney]

Is that a bird?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Heron with the other half.

[Beck Bennett]

Wow.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And he's like crying by the LA river. And I'm like, man, do you live

[Kyle Mooney]

near the LA river or is this sort of a drive?

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, we walk. It's a. It's a pretty half day walk.

[Beck Bennett]

Wow.

[Chelsea Peretti]

But the payoff is phenomenal.

[Kyle Mooney]

And you've done this multiple times or once or.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Well, I did it once with the iPad because, yeah, he didn't have multiples,

[Beck Bennett]

but sounds like something you could do every weekend.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. Also have a big dumpster outside my house and anything like that he's like arguing with me about. I just toss it, chuck it through the window of the house out into the dumpster.

[Beck Bennett]

That is so cool. That's like. That's so badass.

[Kyle Mooney]

It's just nice. I love that you have boundaries because, like, for me, I'm.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Sometimes I'm like, yeah, no, sorry, go ahead.

[Kyle Mooney]

No, I didn't. I don't really have much else to say other than the fact that like, sometimes I'm like, I'll just let it slide this one time.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, you can't. You gotta get a big dumpster and, you know, go to the la.

[Beck Bennett]

I do feel like there is so much and this may be absolutely boring, but there is.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Okay, skip it.

[Beck Bennett]

I have to. I have to. There's so much in my house.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

It's like, I do want a dumpster. I do know. I want. I'm like clearing space in my garage and one of the reasons I want to clear space in my garage is to have like a dumpster.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I know. This is the thing. Our garages just dumpsters. Like, everyone in LA just can't even park in their garage because they just store like 50 million pieces of.

[Beck Bennett]

Absolutely. It's just garbage.

[Kyle Mooney]

I got rat in mine.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I have ratchet outside and there's really no way to get rid of rats. Yeah, my.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, my.

[Kyle Mooney]

I have a situation where we have. We've had somebody come and it's like, yes, it's taken care of.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Same.

[Kyle Mooney]

But it's never taken care of.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No. They have a million places to hide. Like, they're just part of the landscape.

[Beck Bennett]

We got somebody that got rid of our rats for good. What?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Hold on.

[Beck Bennett]

What? And I will get the number for you guys.

[Kyle Mooney]

What's.

[Chelsea Peretti]

What's he doing?

[Beck Bennett]

It's a whole company.

[Kyle Mooney]

I see. I can see it now.

[Chelsea Peretti]

What about the rat catcher?

[Beck Bennett]

That.

[Kyle Mooney]

That's good.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Did you watch that?

[Beck Bennett]

I know what Is that.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Isn't that the name? The Raw doll? Like, there's a. I feel like Wesley Anderson directed it.

[Kyle Mooney]

I don't remember Witches, which has, like. I think the little boy turns into a mouse, maybe.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, yeah, That's a little different.

[Beck Bennett]

That's not what she was thinking about.

[Kyle Mooney]

And, yeah, look at me.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Just any piece of art. Any piece of art that referenced any rodent whatsoever.

[Kyle Mooney]

Written by Roald Dahl. It was written by Roald Dahl.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's like. Okay, it's still stretch.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, it's still a really big stretch. Kyle. That was. You didn't have to do that.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Disgusting.

[Beck Bennett]

You don't. You don't like what you're drinking.

[Chelsea Peretti]

This is like a passion fruit matcha tonic or something. It was absolutely wretched.

[Beck Bennett]

Ew. I'm so sorry.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's, like, bitter.

[Beck Bennett]

That's disgusting.

[Chelsea Peretti]

This is a shot of espresso. Anyone want to do a shot?

[Beck Bennett]

I have coffee right here. Cheers to.

[Kyle Mooney]

Cheers.

[Chelsea Peretti]

To life.

[Beck Bennett]

To always. To always being so great to have you.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, my God.

[Kyle Mooney]

Here, Chelsea. And.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, there we go.

[Kyle Mooney]

Come a little closer.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Sorry.

[Kyle Mooney]

All gravy.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Now, Chelsea, we were talking for a sec outside about your writing time at SNL for a second.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Well, first of all. Okay, go. You go.

[Beck Bennett]

No, no, I was just gonna say how you don't remember when you were

[Kyle Mooney]

there, but it was 2013 right here.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Really?

[Kyle Mooney]

It must have been right before, like, the spring before we arrived.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, that's crazy.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. How long were you there for?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Two ships in the night.

[Beck Bennett]

Two ships in the night. Two shits in the night.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Two shits on the night.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Why not?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Why not say that?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, why not do that? We all know what it means.

[Kyle Mooney]

Shits on the night.

[Beck Bennett]

Two shits on the night. On.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I should have stuck with Ann and

[Beck Bennett]

two shits in my pants.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. No. Snl.

[Beck Bennett]

What a.

[Chelsea Peretti]

What a world.

[Beck Bennett]

What a world. Were you there for a year?

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, I was there for like a week or something. Two weeks, I guess.

[Beck Bennett]

Two weeks.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Two shits in the knife. That's right. That's a good mnemonic to remember. I was there for two weeks.

[Kyle Mooney]

So you were a guest. A guest writer.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. And do you know who Myers recently was? Like that. I always think it's just so crazy that you were offered a writing job there and you turned it down. I go, I didn't. Oh, that didn't happen. And he's like, no, it definitely happened. I go, I feel like I would remember that.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Isn't that weird?

[Beck Bennett]

What do you think? The miscommunication Was. Was it like, did you like.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I have no idea. I mean, they are so funny.

[Beck Bennett]

It is. They're also pretty bad at communication.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. Really?

[Beck Bennett]

You know, like, there's. There are like, a lot of stories where people will be like, I don't know if I got the job after meeting with Lauren.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Really?

[Beck Bennett]

And he's like, well, you know, when you're here and, you know, you know, you'll just stay and, you know, I

[Chelsea Peretti]

used to intern there too, in. In college. My junior year of college, I interned in Lauren's office and I, like, stocked his Amstel lights.

[Kyle Mooney]

Wow.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And I guarded his door. Does someone still do that? It was so dumb. It's like, why don't you just put a lock on the door? No disrespect to Lauren. Cool plan.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

So, so much respect to Lauren. No disrespect.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Cool plan. Not to put a lock on the door.

[Beck Bennett]

But, like, it's. It's a power. Like, if you could have a whole person instead of standing there like a

[Chelsea Peretti]

young child standing there.

[Beck Bennett]

So you were like, you were a Lornette.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, kind of. Except for. Not. Because everyone was blonde in his sphere except me. And I was like a brunette and a weirdo.

[Kyle Mooney]

And like, did you interact with Lauren at all in that?

[Chelsea Peretti]

I mean, I don't even remember any real interactions, but.

[Beck Bennett]

So that was after Kroll show, before

[Kyle Mooney]

you interned after the writing job?

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, before. Before Kroll show and before the writing job. Like when I was in college and that other stuff was later.

[Beck Bennett]

Sorry, the writing job. The two weeks though, that was after Crow Show?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. Oh, I don't know where it was in relation to Kroll Show. Why does that matter?

[Beck Bennett]

I don't know. Because you're on Kroll show and Kroll show was a big. That was a cool thing. I don't know. I'm a Crow show.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Which pieces did you write Unborn in relation to Kroll Show.

[Beck Bennett]

So when was Kroll show as far

[Chelsea Peretti]

as you got ad, you got BC and you got ks.

[Kyle Mooney]

But honestly, what was the Kroll show writers room like?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah,

[Kyle Mooney]

I'm just imagining you guys going

[Beck Bennett]

off

[Kyle Mooney]

just like bit after a bit coming up. I mean, and you got to come up with a new character for. Are you coming up with the characters?

[Chelsea Peretti]

You know, my thing on Crow Show, I was obsessive in pitching. Like, I don't know if you have people like this that you've been around in writers rooms, but, like, you ever latch on to an idea and you just keep pitching it, like. Yeah, so I. I was obsessed with Cake Train, this idea of throwing cakes off a train to people. Like, you know, like, was sort of supposed to be like a zombie thing. Like, you know, everyone's, like, washing dishes, like, having a work meeting, you hear, and it's like, cake Train. And then you run out of your house and people are throwing cakes off a train or whatever. I pitched that so many times. I don't know why. And then it did get made. It was the most expensive sketch. It was. Zach Galifianakis was the conductor.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You know him? Galifianaki.

[Kyle Mooney]

I've met him. I don't know him.

[Beck Bennett]

I don't even know if I've met him. I don't think I.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Who do you really know, though?

[Beck Bennett]

You know? Right? I mean, that's actually really important. Public Zach or Private Zach, you know?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. So to be a third mic on this show, we could. I feel like you guys need a female touch.

[Beck Bennett]

I do think so.

[Kyle Mooney]

We already. You're already offering a lot of new perspective.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, I. Yeah, I. I'm gonna say right now one of the most fun episodes I've ever had.

[Kyle Mooney]

I feel like, could stop right now.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Let's end it.

[Kyle Mooney]

Let's do it.

[Beck Bennett]

Wait, wait, let me ask you. Wait, let me ask you about pro show. When.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, yeah, we didn't get get into. Really into.

[Beck Bennett]

Was that, like, before you had a kid?

[Chelsea Peretti]

I. I think so, yes.

[Beck Bennett]

More crow show timeline stuff.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Crow show. It was fun, but it. It was also funny watching Nick try to keep everyone on task, you know?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And then what else?

[Kyle Mooney]

I was gonna.

[Beck Bennett]

Hello.

[Kyle Mooney]

It's like the hook. Hello. Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

No, this is. She's amazing. I. I was hoping she would do this.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. I.

[Beck Bennett]

No notice. She's like. And this is, like. This is kind of the brand. It's like the style.

[Kyle Mooney]

This couldn't sustain the breath. This is her trying to come up with a. A memory from working at CR Show.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Well, one really funny thing was, like, I did. I forget which character. I think Farley. You know, this crazy woman.

[Beck Bennett]

Love Farley.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. And Andre Brower, when I got it, Brooklyn nine.

[Beck Bennett]

Nine.

[Chelsea Peretti]

May he rest in peace.

[Kyle Mooney]

Rest in peace.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

He was like. Your accent really spans the globe about my accent. Like, I've never been good at accents, and I was just like, thank you, maestro.

[Beck Bennett]

That's cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Meaning it was bad.

[Beck Bennett]

Meaning it was bad.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It was patchy all.

[Beck Bennett]

But you were having fun with it. That's the whole. That's the, like, accents, like, when we did accents. I'm not good at them at snl. Like, you're not. They're not supposed to be, like, great. Like, you're not supposed to be, like, hitting it perfectly. You're supposed to just be having fun.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Right? That's cool.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Yeah. Now I gotta. I can.

[Kyle Mooney]

I mean, we just spent about 19 minutes on the Crawl show. Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

What was it like having sex?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Was it freaky? Dizzy? Being a girly? Was it scary for girls? Because, like, girls. Hey, girls must be so scared when they have sex.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Because the guy's got a huge penis.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

We don't. You really don't have to. That scares me.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. That's cool.

[Kyle Mooney]

It's like this is kind of like. He goes. He goes on these. He goes on one of his backgrounds.

[Chelsea Peretti]

He's like, I've got a woman in a closed door room. You know, it's like, whoa, roll up my sleeves.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, yeah. Your. Your Coffee album.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yes.

[Beck Bennett]

So funny.

[Kyle Mooney]

I remember hearing it when it came out. I loved it. Yeah, it's so. It's produced so well.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Thank you. Kojak. My friend, my buddy, I love Kojak. He now lives in Santa Fe. Yeah, I just went out there and visited him. But, yeah, we never fully finished it. We have songs, like. I have a song with Richard Marks that we never released.

[Beck Bennett]

Whoa, whoa.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And a song with Juliet Lewis that I don't think we ever released.

[Kyle Mooney]

There is a song with Juliet Lewis out there, but.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, okay. We did release that. No, we did.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That got out great. As I was seeing. I was like, did we. It's. It was a long time ago. It was a lot of trauma.

[Beck Bennett]

It's so. It's so fun. I mean, like, Oat milk is so funny and good and BDR is that. Yeah, yeah. It's like. They're all these different.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Kathleen, Hannah.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, they're all these different genres and they're so, like, they're very. They capture the genres very well. They feel like these. You know what I mean? They're like these individual. Like, they're just. It's good music.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, I. I've always. Always loved music. And I think it's music.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I know it's something like you tap your toe to it a little bit.

[Beck Bennett]

Well, I mean, yeah, you bob your

[Kyle Mooney]

head around, but I. Is an amazing way to express yourself. And like. I don't know, it just.

[Beck Bennett]

It.

[Kyle Mooney]

It's. Even when I'm like, walking around the house, I'll listen to it.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You. So you're able to do both, like, walk.

[Beck Bennett]

I, Like, I. I'll walk outside, though.

[Kyle Mooney]

Absolutely.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I Mean, my thing was, like, I. We started making it, and there were much more, like, funny songs. I was like, this sounds annoying. So then we just started making good songs, and then it was like, really, like, I was like, isn't it funnier if it's a good song about coffee? But, like, yeah. I don't know ultimately what the. What the answer is. Yeah, but it was a real rabbit hole. I mean, we went like. It was like eight months, and then the pandemic hit, and I was like, why did I spend the last three months, you know, when I could have

[Beck Bennett]

been doing that now? Perfect thing to do during a pandemic.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Well, kind of, except, like, I wasn't going near Kozak during that time. So, like, it was annoying.

[Kyle Mooney]

Do you want to make more music? Music?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't know. The thing was, like, I actually don't think I'm that good of a singer, so, like, I never wanted to really go on tour or anything.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Have you performed it? The.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I haven't really. I was going to try to do, like, some sort of thing, and then it all got sidelined by the.

[Beck Bennett]

I really think you should.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Interesting.

[Beck Bennett]

I really think you should do it. I think you should make more music.

[Kyle Mooney]

Absolutely.

[Beck Bennett]

I. I make, like, we make. We make some music. That's what this is for. And it's. I. I've. It's just, like, fun to, like.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Let's make something.

[Beck Bennett]

You want to make some?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Throw down sort of a tune.

[Kyle Mooney]

Can I ask you a question while I set this up?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. And what was it like to lose your virginity?

[Beck Bennett]

Like.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Because you haven't answered it yet.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Like, really, what was it like?

[Kyle Mooney]

I'm just curious. Like, kind of. Yeah. I mean, who was the. Who was the other person? What was their deal? Like, it's more just like, kind of background. I don't need to know about the act. Like, that's.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, we all. Because we all know what's going on,

[Chelsea Peretti]

but, like, he was an actor, actually.

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, really?

[Chelsea Peretti]

A theater actor.

[Beck Bennett]

That's the bat. The best kind.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It was beautiful. He kind of looked like Ethan Hawke.

[Beck Bennett]

Could he sing?

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't know.

[Kyle Mooney]

You grew up with Andy. Our friend Andy Samberg.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's right. Big crush.

[Kyle Mooney]

Really?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Big crush on him in elementary school.

[Beck Bennett]

Really?

[Chelsea Peretti]

You know what's weird? I liked his butt.

[Beck Bennett]

Wow.

[Chelsea Peretti]

In elementary school.

[Kyle Mooney]

I imagine you told him that. In some.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't know if I ever did. Hey, Andy. What's up?

[Beck Bennett]

What's up, Chelsea? Liked your butt in elementary school. How many grades apart, were you Guys.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Guess we were in the same grade.

[Beck Bennett]

Great.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Why do I look 5,000 years older than him?

[Beck Bennett]

You must. Were you his teacher or something?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Were you 10 years older?

[Beck Bennett]

I just imagine that it couldn't have been same grade. Just like that seems too perfect. Yeah, but like, how many kids in

[Chelsea Peretti]

class was a class size you're weird ass interview.

[Beck Bennett]

And then, like, did you see people in the hallway?

[Chelsea Peretti]

We didn't have halls that we had, like, classes that were outside.

[Beck Bennett]

That's crazy, man.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Okay, how do I turn my cans down a little bit? No, now it's quiet. Really quiet.

[Beck Bennett]

I. I have asked people before how big their schools were because I had a huge school.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't know how big it was. And it's expanded since I went there.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay, okay, okay, okay. I'll look into it.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay, okay, okay.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Turn it up a little bit more. Not to be like a rapper.

[Beck Bennett]

How big was your school? How many kids?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Too big. We have to rap. You're wrapping.

[Beck Bennett]

No, no, no. No rapping. Rapping's too much.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I'll sing the hook if you're gonna rap.

[Beck Bennett]

We could just like throw around some ideas and whatever sticks.

[Chelsea Peretti]

He's like. But basically something about crochet or your virginity within.

[Beck Bennett]

Were you on crochet when you lost your virginity in your school with so many kids? When you're looking at Andy's big bold butt, did you like the way it moved in the. Hal didn't have hallways.

[Kyle Mooney]

I guess my question was. Was just like, good warm up.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Good warm up.

[Kyle Mooney]

I mean, do you think I feel like there are a lot of. I've known Beck since college I've known

[Chelsea Peretti]

Beck since college Known Beck since college Known back since college I've known back since college I've known since college Beck since college College since college since college

[Beck Bennett]

Known Beck since college Chelsea's known Andy

[Chelsea Peretti]

since college Big butt since college since college. Since college Andy's but since college Known Kyle since college. Song has so much meaning.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Back in the day studying my books

[Beck Bennett]

A little boy with outrageous looks.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Wow.

[Kyle Mooney]

Keep going.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I want to go into that world that sci fi ass world the name

[Kyle Mooney]

is Captain Mulda from the planet sorrow I've come from the land that we call tomorrow so set your clocks back and join my machine As I take you to a land that I call

[Beck Bennett]

dreams Anything can happen when you're dreaming in your dreams Dreams Anything can happen when you're dreaming in your dreams A little off there.

[Kyle Mooney]

I remember the time I first started traveling through stars and space My mind was unraveling by the way, I'm very small, Just a little tiny guy. Miniature wise, I'm only about two apples high.

[Beck Bennett]

Anything can happen in your dream Dreams those apples. Anything can happen when you're dreaming in your dream Two apples many, many men.

[Kyle Mooney]

Sometimes you lose your virginity what does

[Chelsea Peretti]

it feel like when you lose that precious bee?

[Beck Bennett]

What does it feel like downstairs between your legs? Describe that feeling. Oh, my God.

[Chelsea Peretti]

There's a rhyme right there.

[Kyle Mooney]

Hairs, hairs long and hairs so short I was fucking but now I have to abort I'm running late for my

[Beck Bennett]

tea party and now I get. And now I'm no longer hardy. Anything can happen happen in your dreams Come on. And we're gonna wrap it. Anything can happen happen in your Dr. Beautiful.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Pretty good.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, we got it.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, we got it.

[Kyle Mooney]

I feel like it's. It's nice. It is 4:20. We're recording on four.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, really?

[Kyle Mooney]

That. This gave. This made me feel like we were sort of hitting the ball to a little bit.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, I got. I got pretty lifted there.

[Kyle Mooney]

Did you ever smoke weed?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Pretty good. It reminds me of Reading Rainbow.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Yeah. It's a little like a little David

[Kyle Mooney]

chance to get in a verse. Do you want to get.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't really feel like rapping.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, you don't have to know.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I'm not a rapper. I like. I like you doing that, though. You were really, like, invested.

[Beck Bennett]

Kyle was a. Kyle's a big rapper.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Your eyes were lit up. I was like, take me where you're going. I. I really believed it.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. You were in the lock in. I kind of. I kind of like to sing.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, I like singing. I like singing. It's my house. I mean, I would rap off camera.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Do you.

[Kyle Mooney]

Do you like, Like, I'll do the audio.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, the camera. Rapping. Do you. Do you, like, make songs? Do you like. I mean, I know you make songs, but do you like, sing songs all the time? Like, are you always.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Do you.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, like, I'm always like, like my

[Chelsea Peretti]

friend from junior high, whenever she comes to visit, we are singing like nine.

[Kyle Mooney]

Making up lyrics.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. Do you.

[Beck Bennett]

Do you have stuff to, like, record? Like make like make beats or anything?

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's just like, aside from my podcast, I used to send Koj. The whole reason we made a coffee album is I used to like, on my podcast, I would send him, like, me just singing acapella when I was on the road doing comedy because, you know, you'd like, lose your mind. Have you guys toured with your show?

[Beck Bennett]

No, no, Kyle's toured With his. His album, by the way. You can. You can leave your. You can leave your headphones on. We're taking ours.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh,

[Kyle Mooney]

I liked it. Yeah. Yeah, it was last summer.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, that's perfect.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Do you not want it in the background? Felt that air of transgressing.

[Kyle Mooney]

So you would, like, record voice memos

[Chelsea Peretti]

and send them, and I would send them, and he would just add beats, and then I would play them on my podcast. But then we were like, we should make an album.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Yeah, I do that with my buddy Gabe. Gabe Noel. If you know Gabe Noel, I grew up with him.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, that's right.

[Kyle Mooney]

That's kind of.

[Beck Bennett]

Anything can happen when you're friends with Gabe. When you're friends with Gabe. No Gab.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No. You're being a major Gabe Nole. You ever say that to him?

[Beck Bennett]

Stop being such a gab. Such a Gabe.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, dude.

[Beck Bennett]

No. I will now, though. Yeah, you can. It's applicable.

[Kyle Mooney]

It sounds like a hole.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Gay hole.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

I would be nervous to say that.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I'm fine with it.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, you can say it. Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Do you think there's something about, though, like.

[Beck Bennett]

And I.

[Kyle Mooney]

This is. Might say this will sound corny, actually.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Okay.

[Kyle Mooney]

But, like, when you come up with something, it's like the fact that you've known Andy for so long, I feel like there's a lot of this that exists. Like friends that end up.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I know. I wish I went to nyu because I feel like everyone I love went to nyu. Like, everyone's careers that seem great went to nyu. I'm like, Barnard. You.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, you went to Barnard.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

I had a girlfriend.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Barnyard. More like Barnyard. Moo. You shouldn't have went there.

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, get out of the way.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Get out the way.

[Kyle Mooney]

Get out of this. Moo. Get out the hay.

[Beck Bennett]

Lay it down. Get out the hay.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Get out there.

[Beck Bennett]

That's good.

[Kyle Mooney]

I think that's all we have.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's really good. There's. There's definitely more.

[Beck Bennett]

I agree. My wife went to NYU and she's. I'm friends with a lot of her friends that went to NYU and they're all successful. They're all doing very.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, it seems like. I don't know why. Something in the water.

[Beck Bennett]

I don't know why.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I feel really weird without my headphones now. Do you.

[Kyle Mooney]

You want to put them on?

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't want to, but I'm good with that. Do you feel like, suddenly a little naked?

[Kyle Mooney]

They're not going to just.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. Like a naked mole rat.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, I feel like a little naked.

[Kyle Mooney]

Do you. Oh, I had such a amazing thing.

[Beck Bennett]

I have an amazing thing to say.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay, you want me to think. You want me to.

[Beck Bennett]

You did a sign up. Wait.

[Kyle Mooney]

But mine is. Mine is very relevant.

[Chelsea Peretti]

He tells the same anecdote about past apps.

[Kyle Mooney]

So there's funny.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay. Were you gonna tell the past app the thing?

[Kyle Mooney]

I. I did. Just want to clarify. I made him sound, like, British or something like that. He was just a Nor.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I prefer not.

[Beck Bennett]

I'd rather you not. I'd rather not. Excuse me.

[Kyle Mooney]

Do you happen to have any gray poo poem? What did you study at Bernard?

[Chelsea Peretti]

God, you know, I feel like I had. I, I, I majored in English with a writing concentration. That's what it was.

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, wow.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Served you well.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Worked out.

[Beck Bennett]

You're.

[Kyle Mooney]

You're so great at English.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Thank you.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. You're amazing. The way that you're able to just like, just talk.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Watch this. Oh, I came from B. See what?

[Beck Bennett]

Those were new words.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I know before, like, I was going to try to say really fast sentence. I just said sounds.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Watch this.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay.

[Beck Bennett]

Barner, people.

[Chelsea Peretti]

What was Chris Kattan's character?

[Kyle Mooney]

He was always a Mr. Peepers.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I just.

[Kyle Mooney]

And did he ever come to the offices when you were interning?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, God, I can't remember. I remember Sherry o' Terry because I loved her when I was in high school. I was like, she's a God. And then I felt like it was just. It was weird. Like, I was just like, SNL was crazy because as a high school student, you're like, it's the happiest place on Earth.

[Beck Bennett]

And then you go in there, it's like, yes, absolutely. Like, good nights. And it's like, oh, you're all on stage hugging each other. Yeah, it must be the best.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

And like, the first couple years were like, I don't know who my. I'm out of my body. Yeah, No, I know. It's just like. It's just like. It's so hard when you're there. And I would get a little rig

[Chelsea Peretti]

where they just lift me straight up

[Beck Bennett]

out of the good night.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Someone goes to hug you and you're

[Beck Bennett]

like, no, no, no, I'm out of here.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Hydraulics.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, there's. I mean, I feel like you're getting it. There's also the thing of searching for a hug. You know what I mean? Like, where you're like, yeah, you're looking

[Chelsea Peretti]

and then, you know it's on camera. That's so scary.

[Beck Bennett]

And the camera's on you doing.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, no. Like hugging someone's back. You're hugging them from behind.

[Beck Bennett]

Quick. Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

And then like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Hey, come on.

[Beck Bennett]

That's you looking at the camera.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, that's.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Go to sleep, guys. You. You're like promoing your friend's shirt company.

[Kyle Mooney]

I was going to say interrupted your.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, no, it's okay. I saw your name on the, the marquee at the Elysian.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, I worked last night.

[Beck Bennett]

Great.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You know, it's cool. I'm just trying to keep up with, you know, the alt right. Legends playing msg.

[Beck Bennett]

You know, I gotta try to keep

[Chelsea Peretti]

my hat in the game. I did my hour. I have not done a ton of stand up in recent years and sort of gotten almost like a phobia of it. So it was, it was good to do.

[Kyle Mooney]

Well, let's hear the best bet.

[Chelsea Peretti]

So basically, no, I, I never. I'm not that kind of person.

[Kyle Mooney]

Do people do that?

[Chelsea Peretti]

I guess some people are like that. Like, I always feel like Sarah Silverman, like, if you were like, do this bit, she would do it or something. I. I feel so, like, if someone's like, do something, I'm like, I'm not

[Beck Bennett]

going to do that. It's not going to be good, it's going to be bad.

[Kyle Mooney]

What is your.

[Beck Bennett]

It's all uncomfortable.

[Kyle Mooney]

Corny. Again. I feel like I'm asking a basic question here, but what is your writing process for standup?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, I think of a lot of things in the shower.

[Kyle Mooney]

And then you go. And then you go.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Any questions about women in showers?

[Beck Bennett]

So, like, washing your body, Is it just regular show?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Are your tits extra slippery?

[Kyle Mooney]

I don't want to do that stuff anymore.

[Beck Bennett]

I know.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Okay, fine. I. I'll lay off this. I'll lay off this. I don't want to over sexualize my sex itself.

[Beck Bennett]

No, no, I love it. It's great. I think we're all on the same page.

[Chelsea Peretti]

But also like, I feel like. I don't know if you have this, but like friends that are like, you just laugh so much with certain friends, but they don't work in comedy. And so, you know, they just. Every time you hang out with them, you wind up writing down where you're like, yeah, I don't know. Like, I feel like when you hang out with comedy people, any joke you share, it's almost like, whose is this?

[Beck Bennett]

Right?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Who gets to keep this? Or something. Not that I'm like stealing jokes for my. I'm sweating.

[Beck Bennett]

Well, like, people are also trying to be funny. So there aren't like things that are just happening.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, exactly.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Your Friends say stuff or do you have an interaction? It's like, what is that?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Certain people bring out my silliest side, where I feel really, like, creative, and then I just, like, think of stuff. Is she taking notes on what I'm saying?

[Beck Bennett]

I know.

[Kyle Mooney]

I will start hanging out with more friends.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Like a doctor, an intake thing. They're like, you mind if use AI for this?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Anyway, so sort of like, it comes alive on stage.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I imagine that's the other thing. So I record my sets, like, in a voice note, and then I listen to it, and that's when I. I notice, oh, I improvised throughout, you know, riff, as it were.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And tag things and stuff in the moment, there's nothing like having your back against the wall to make you think of a tag. You know what I mean? Like, how'd it go yesterday? It was good. It. The thing that's weird is it was hot. Hot in the room. I was on stage, I go, it's. Is it hot in here? And they're like, yes, the audience. And that's the second venue in LA where I've been, like, hot on stage. And I'm like, this is a new thing. I think it's like an economy thing. Like, people aren't seeing the venues.

[Beck Bennett]

We don't have money.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's not good for comedy. Like a hot room. People are like.

[Kyle Mooney]

I feel like. Because SNL was very cold, and I remember.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, yeah. Like an ice box.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Kyle Mooney]

But I remember hearing, like, somebody say that Letterman, I think it was Letterman, kept his studio cold. Like, there's something.

[Chelsea Peretti]

There's a thing about it with comedy.

[Kyle Mooney]

People laugh more when they're like,

[Beck Bennett]

Here he is. Yeah, it's true.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's why I'm doing my next special. I'm shooting it at the top of Mount Everest.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, my God, that's so brave. That's going to be funny.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Some of the best crafts ads you can get, half of them are frozen block cadavers.

[Beck Bennett]

At least they're showing up.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

It's hard to get people out to live comedy these days.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah. But it's funny because, as I'm saying, all this, like, me and my friend Moshe, we used to have this joke of, like, when you're like, how'd your set go? And it's like, well, the room wasn't hot. And we get it. You bumped.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. The room wasn't the perfect temperature, so I don't really know.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It was kind of a. I really actually don't like long rooms for comedy. You Know where it's. It's like. It's a rectangular shape, and it goes back as, like. I feel like you're not able to connect with the people in the back or something. And, like, but any parameter where you're like, well, the venue, this or that.

[Kyle Mooney]

We get it.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You bombed, right?

[Beck Bennett]

You bought it. Has nothing to do with the venue. Are you in the beginning of this process of getting.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I'm thinking about touring. Yeah. I think I might tour in the fall.

[Beck Bennett]

Cool.

[Kyle Mooney]

This is an exclusive. You've never told anyone, I imagine, and we're sort of getting the first dibs.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I did tell Blair Sochi on her podcast recently.

[Kyle Mooney]

That's funny. That's. That's funny.

[Beck Bennett]

You heard him for the second time.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Awesome.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah. So how did that conversation go? I was curious.

[Chelsea Peretti]

With Blair. It's a clip. You can see it.

[Beck Bennett]

No, I'm just kidding.

[Kyle Mooney]

I think we've actually done really well. I think we can move to the next.

[Beck Bennett]

I think we can. I think we can. Can ask you what you think our podcast should be about.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Okay.

[Beck Bennett]

So you can try it.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's gonna be called Deletion.

[Beck Bennett]

Deletion.

[Kyle Mooney]

Deletion.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Okay, okay, okay. Depending how you want to say it. You can say, like, delicious,

[Beck Bennett]

Right? That's what's cool about it.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You can say it so many ways.

[Beck Bennett]

Amazing.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay.

[Chelsea Peretti]

So delicious.

[Beck Bennett]

Delicious.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Deletion.

[Kyle Mooney]

Deleting things.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. You have to stick with the word,

[Kyle Mooney]

but it's the process.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I see the name of the podcast, like, deletion. Deletions.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, that works.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Anyway, it's a podcast where you talk about, like, what you might wish to delete from the world and what the ramifications would be.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, wow, that's very interesting. Okay, great. Well, yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Do you like Escape Rooms?

[Beck Bennett]

No, no, not. Well, I think if I went with the right. If I went with the right people.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I love them.

[Beck Bennett]

Do you really?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, I have the app. Morty.

[Beck Bennett]

You have the app?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, there's an app that. It's like Yelp for Escape rooms.

[Beck Bennett]

So how often are you going to Escape Rooms?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Well, it depends on the month, but there was a time where. Yeah, like, I was going a lot.

[Kyle Mooney]

See, here's my thing with the scape room. First of all, I do think there is. It's tough to be in the mid. Like. Like, in terms of your fandom of escape rooms, I feel like you're either pretty enthusiastic or you're. Or you're like, okay, I'll do it, or you're, like, not into it at all.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. People are always like, I'd be too scared or I'd be claustrophobic. I'm like, they don't lock you in. That's like, what everyone thinks is that you're locked in. You can literally walk out the door.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, Okay.

[Kyle Mooney]

I did not know.

[Beck Bennett]

I would imagine that would be kind of illegal to lock you in.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

You can't get out until you find the right key.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. It's like. No. People really think that, though.

[Kyle Mooney]

That'd be like Jigsaw from Saw or something.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, that'd be crazy.

[Kyle Mooney]

Crazy to me. I. I think it's. It's not the fear of. It's not the claustrophobia. It's that I. I feel stupid if I don't do well.

[Chelsea Peretti]

But if you work with a team of people, everyone has. I mean, here's my thing. Some people aren't fun to do. Are you okay? You're like this.

[Beck Bennett]

I was about to say something and then what?

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, I'm nervous.

[Beck Bennett]

I typically, back in the day, when it was like people were doing it, the people spearheading it, I was always like, they're too much. They're going to be like, running it

[Chelsea Peretti]

and being like, this is the thing.

[Beck Bennett]

You know what I mean? Like. But if I was going with the children.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Alpha males, alpha males ruin everything. Like, every experience sucks when you're with dudes who want to prove how smart they are and control everyone.

[Beck Bennett]

Right.

[Chelsea Peretti]

If you go with a group of people that's fun and collaborative, everyone kind of brings their own thing to it and it's super fun. And you all are like, hey, yeah, good job. Blue, Blue. And it's like. It's not like that.

[Beck Bennett]

That's great.

[Kyle Mooney]

There. I do. There is something very funny, though, about, like thinking you're discovering something and you're. You're. You're not. You know what I mean?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Like, that does happen a lot. Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

I've actually noticed these grape.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, I know.

[Beck Bennett]

No, that's not a thing. That's not a clue.

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, okay.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. No, and I mean, yeah, it's weird. It's like, I really love, like, physical. Finding physical things in escape rooms.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

The dumb person's role.

[Kyle Mooney]

Got something.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Can you guys figure out what this is? This. But I don't know. Anyway, and then I just started getting into little bit scary ones.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay. Oh, cool.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Like, there's one called Insane Asylum. That's really fun.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, I can imagine. The weirdos. Let us in.

[Beck Bennett]

Is that. Is that one where, like characters come in or.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, but I have done one like that before, but I don't think it exists anymore because I tried to find it, but it was one where, like, you're in this old lady's mansion and everyone's seated at a certain chamber chair, and they're like. When the old lady comes back into the room, you all have to be in your same chairs. And so you're, like, going through all this, and then she's like, oh, I'm bringing tea. And you're like. And then she's, like, staring at everyone. It was really fun.

[Beck Bennett]

That's really fun.

[Kyle Mooney]

And was it really an old lady?

[Chelsea Peretti]

It was a character. Like, it was a character actor. Like a comedy person. They were like a uc.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay, wait, how do we get from deletion to.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't know. I was just trying to think that

[Beck Bennett]

you asked us if we, like, like to escape.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, because deletions. Deletions.

[Beck Bennett]

Deletion.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yes. I feel like it has an escape room feel to it. Just the concept, a little bit of

[Kyle Mooney]

deleting your brain from the world that we never deal with again. And the repercussions.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. Not like. Don't overthink it, though. It's not like that. Connected.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay.

[Beck Bennett]

Sorry.

[Kyle Mooney]

I was just trying to, like, kind of talk to you.

[Beck Bennett]

I don't know.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Sorry.

[Beck Bennett]

We're not, like, scientists, so we. We won't actually know.

[Kyle Mooney]

Is this a podcast?

[Beck Bennett]

Three camera.

[Kyle Mooney]

Michelle's basically Manning.

[Beck Bennett]

She's typing away back there.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. She's taking notes. She's, like, doing a psych eval.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, exactly.

[Beck Bennett]

She might be.

[Kyle Mooney]

I think we'll put you in the insane asylum escape room. Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's really fun. Anyway. Yeah, I think it was a tenuous connection at best, but just a little bit of that brainy. Let's go there.

[Kyle Mooney]

We'll be right back with Delicio

[Chelsea Peretti]

Foreign.

[Beck Bennett]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states.

[Kyle Mooney]

Dude.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay. What's up, dude? So great to be back here at the podcast.

[Kyle Mooney]

It's hard out here for a pimp. What was that? That was from a movie.

[Beck Bennett]

I think it's hard out here for a pimp.

[Kyle Mooney]

Hustle and Flow.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, I think it is. Yeah. With Terrence Howard.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

I was hard out here.

[Kyle Mooney]

I never asked you what are your favorite. What are your top three Movies.

[Beck Bennett]

My top three movies are probably Hook and Forrest Gump.

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay.

[Beck Bennett]

I don't know. And. And Requiem for a Dream.

[Kyle Mooney]

I gotta say, sometimes, you know, we do these little openings to the podcast.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

And I'm like, we have something. And I'm like, oh, we don't have anything. And I'm like, I wish there was a big button. I could just go. And the whole thing is gone.

[Beck Bennett]

That would be awesome. Well, let's. Let's do that on. Let's find out if that can happen. Deletion podcast. That's what it's all about. You told us. Deletion is our podcast. That's what we'll talk about with Beck and Kyle.

[Kyle Mooney]

All right. We have. We. I. I got to say, we have somebody here who I'd never to delete.

[Beck Bennett]

Absolutely.

[Kyle Mooney]

I wish there was a button to be like, more, more, more. Multiply, multiply, multiply, multiply.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Can you imagine if there was, like, an opposite button?

[Kyle Mooney]

A Chelsea Infinity.

[Beck Bennett]

The infinity button.

[Kyle Mooney]

But, yeah. Chelsea Peretti is actually who I'm referring to.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. And she is right here with us.

[Kyle Mooney]

Icon. How you doing, Chelsea? She's got her box.

[Beck Bennett]

She's got her box.

[Kyle Mooney]

She brought her a little box of coffee.

[Beck Bennett]

You know that.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Top of the morning, do you.

[Beck Bennett]

Top of the morning to you, Chelsea. We've never seen anybody do that with the. I'm serious.

[Kyle Mooney]

I know.

[Beck Bennett]

That's.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's my thing always. It's like, whoa. Never sit in and do that.

[Kyle Mooney]

You always create a game called Props, and it.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That.

[Kyle Mooney]

And you. You grab something, be like, oh, no, my cut. My. It's huge.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I would play that. Do you know I used to be in an improv troupe in college?

[Beck Bennett]

Really?

[Kyle Mooney]

Is that something I. I did see, we have a.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You have a note. Six Milks at Columbia University.

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, that's not the one.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Not too shabby, huh?

[Kyle Mooney]

I read about Variety Shack.

[Beck Bennett]

What was it called?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, yeah, Variety Check.

[Beck Bennett]

What was it called?

[Chelsea Peretti]

6 milks.

[Beck Bennett]

6 milks.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Eban Moss Bakar.

[Beck Bennett]

Wow.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Was in there.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay.

[Kyle Mooney]

So do you ever kind of head over to the bear set and, like,

[Chelsea Peretti]

kind of, hey, man, I'm like, props.

[Beck Bennett]

Let's play. Let's bring back six mil,

[Chelsea Peretti]

Evan. Like that. I get him going like that.

[Beck Bennett]

But he's probably too focused, too, in character.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. He's a serious actor now.

[Beck Bennett]

He's a serious actor.

[Chelsea Peretti]

He doesn't even. He doesn't even remember being in it. Improv trip.

[Beck Bennett]

He doesn't remember being in an improv.

[Kyle Mooney]

No.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You like Eon e. And he's just like this. You're like, he's staring out.

[Beck Bennett]

Maybe he's deleted it.

[Chelsea Peretti]

He's done so many like portraits and stuff. Like doing press. Like he's just like kind of posing and stuff. You're like e. Yeah. You can't like break focus.

[Beck Bennett]

You're always there off camera trying to get him to come back.

[Kyle Mooney]

We met in RM improv group in college.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Really Comedus interrupt us.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. Michelle Collins. Do you know her? She was in my improv group too.

[Beck Bennett]

I don't know Michelle.

[Chelsea Peretti]

She's really funny.

[Kyle Mooney]

How far did you be now? Were any of these people like the director or anything like that?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Can't remember that. I became the leader of the group in some way.

[Kyle Mooney]

I don't know what the word was,

[Chelsea Peretti]

like toward the end and I hated it. Like I was like, oh, this sucks. Yeah. I preferred to not be in charge. Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Did you start out? Sorry? Did you start out shows like. Hey, what's the name of the group?

[Chelsea Peretti]

This was before Crow show, by the way.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay. That's what I was going to ask.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

The name of the group was Six Milks. So it's like, hey, everybody, we're Six Milks and we need a suggestion from you. All right. Can I get a non geographical location where you might not typically find a couple or that.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I think we like actually were a little cooler than the average. Improper.

[Beck Bennett]

That's cool.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Did you ever see Death by Ruru in New York?

[Beck Bennett]

Not New York. Saw them in la, but yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

They were like more. More edgier. I thought. I liked them.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

More like. Let me get a suggestion

[Chelsea Peretti]

or I'll give myself one. Thanks. You're like, all right. Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Punk rock.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, yeah. They wrote in on motorcycles to the stage.

[Kyle Mooney]

That is raw and awesome.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

And intimidating.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It was. And the audience like kind of had to recover for a little bit and

[Beck Bennett]

I feel like that would. There would be a lot of exhaust. I would think theater, a small stage

[Kyle Mooney]

and like you must have been like eight motorcycles or something like that.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Five people later died of cancer from that exhaust. And it couldn't be proven to be linked, but most likely.

[Kyle Mooney]

So they knew that people were affected by exhaust. They knew they were at a show where the performers wrote it on a motorcycle.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. Curtis Gwynn was. Has blood on his hands. One of the people was Kurt's gwyn, John Gamberling.

[Kyle Mooney]

And they couldn't prove that the deaths were associated with that specific motorcycle.

[Chelsea Peretti]

True.

[Kyle Mooney]

Interesting.

[Chelsea Peretti]

So if you want to kill someone.

[Kyle Mooney]

Well, I bet that's a moment I bet that's a moment where you want to press the delete button.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, yeah, I'd want to press the delete button there for sure.

[Kyle Mooney]

You know who I'm curious is? We kind of always start out our show like this, by the way, I want to get into your past and sort of like coming up in Oakland and the comedy stuff, which I think is so fascinating how you got to come. I always love when I talk to standups, because I know you guys are kind of. You're always. You're always coming up with bits together. You're talking it out. You're like, oh, you know. Yeah. Oh, my tissue. Huh? Well, you know, they got Kleenex, but that's not the name of what a tissue could just be called. Tissue. Kleenex is the brand. You know what I mean? You're always doing the, like. Kind of like riffs on what old versus new, you know, Coke and a hundred percent.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's what I got into it for. That's what I love about it.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

But I want to know, and I don't want to put you on the spot, but anyone, anyone? Free for all here. Deletion. You know, that's what we're talking about today. Is there anything that you're like, I can't. I can't deal with this anymore.

[Chelsea Peretti]

French fries.

[Beck Bennett]

What are. Come on.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You want French fries from the face of the earth for this reason? They're good, but honestly, they're not. Like, there's better things for me. Like, if I were to indulge, it would be like carbonara, like a pasta. Like, if I have the calories on the table, I rather go for that. So French fries, they're ubiquitous. They're everywhere. Everyone's always getting. Yeah. Side of fries. Yeah. You want that with fries? Yeah. Your muscles react before your brain can say no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All gets fries with that. Then all of a sudden, before you know it, you've eaten a bunch of fries. Someone else orders fries. Can I grab a fry?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

All of a sudden, you're eating fries every day.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And it's just like, so why not delete it? Sure. Some kids will be crying, my child.

[Kyle Mooney]

Almost exclusively.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I know. Your kid would die.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, your kid would die. That's one of the ramifications. That's one of the ramifications. Ha.

[Kyle Mooney]

You think.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You think grandma ramifications? Oh, it's just a silly game. No, things like, there's serious things that could happen. I mean, I think ramifications.

[Beck Bennett]

And I think. I also think Potato chips would be everywhere.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I would delete plain potato chips from the face of now.

[Kyle Mooney]

You don't have to now.

[Beck Bennett]

You're coming after. Now. Potatoes are like. You're coming after potatoes.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I love a mashed potato. I'll keep those.

[Beck Bennett]

See, I don't. I can delete mashed potatoes.

[Chelsea Peretti]

So we'll keep mashed, and we'll delete.

[Beck Bennett]

Excuse me. No way, sister. Not in this world. I think. I think, think. I mean, what about. What about home fries? Yeah, basically, home fries. They can stay because they're not that good and they're not that tempting.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Hey, can I have a glop of your hash browns? You know, it's like.

[Beck Bennett]

Could I have one of your home fries?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Serious, dude.

[Kyle Mooney]

My daughter. Pass on.

[Beck Bennett]

He's thinking about his daughter.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You're still stewing over that?

[Kyle Mooney]

Come on.

[Beck Bennett]

What's the big deal? Have another one.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's. Yeah, it's a pretend ramification. It's a mental exercise. All right.

[Beck Bennett]

Sorry.

[Kyle Mooney]

I thought it was real for a second.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, man.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, well, because it's. Because you have such an imagination, Kyle.

[Kyle Mooney]

That's true. We're on the subject of foods, and we. And we're taking swing.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

See, a lot of this is. It's, like, so subjective. It's like. This is the way I feel. Right. I don't think we need desserts.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, so I take away fries. You're gonna try to take away desserts?

[Beck Bennett]

You're come for Chelsea. Like, that. You're gonna come for Chelsea.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You're like, this likes desserts. And I can see it.

[Kyle Mooney]

Honest.

[Chelsea Peretti]

What girl doesn't?

[Beck Bennett]

What girl doesn't?

[Chelsea Peretti]

What girl doesn't?

[Beck Bennett]

Because this is actually because the way their bodies are. And. And, like, the. Because of the periods that they get, like, all the blood that's coming through, and they want something sweet to make the life a little bit nicer.

[Kyle Mooney]

I can't.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Deleting desserts is anti. Woman.

[Kyle Mooney]

All right, let's keep desserts.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Desserts.

[Beck Bennett]

Desserts.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Stay.

[Beck Bennett]

I mean, let's do this.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Let's delete a dessert. What would be the one you would go to if you had to?

[Beck Bennett]

I. I know exactly what it is. It's not panna cotta, but it could be. But it. What's the creme brulee? I don't need creme brulee.

[Kyle Mooney]

It's never very specific. I'm fine. I'm thinking broader. I think, like, cakes could go. What the.

[Beck Bennett]

What are you talking about? Dude, that's birthday ice cream.

[Kyle Mooney]

You got cookies. Like, that's Fine.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I make a song about cakes right now. No, don't delete cakes.

[Beck Bennett]

Don't do. I would rather. But I would probably rather like, anytime

[Kyle Mooney]

I, like, kind of have one of my deletion ideas. It gets shot down immediately.

[Beck Bennett]

Well, can you, like, come up with a better one?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, like creme brulee. Listen, I like it, but I'm like, okay, fair enough.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, cakes.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, all cakes. You're not even seeing flavor.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay, so what's gonna happen? You get rid of cakes. Do you know, like, we wouldn't really be celebrating birthdays anymore.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, you're like, happy birthday to you.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

A big old cookie.

[Beck Bennett]

Hey, hey, hey, hey. Happy birthday, big old cook. Because the person's so sad because it's their birthday.

[Kyle Mooney]

A big old sundae, ice cream sundae. Everybody has a. Has a bit of it. You grab a scoop.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, yeah, you're out. You're out at the park. You have the Sunday, like, let's bring out the sundae for a little Mikey. And then it's all melted. It's a big pile of this world they've create.

[Kyle Mooney]

They've created special little freezer coolers.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, this isn't additions. This isn't additions. This is the existing world. You can't add tech. You can't add tech.

[Kyle Mooney]

Heck.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay, okay, okay. How about this podcast?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, I have a song. Delete this podcast. But it.

[Beck Bennett]

Delete it. Delete this. No, I don't have full.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Like, I could send you the song.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, you can. She could just sing it. She could just sing. She could riff on it.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't remember how it goes, except. Delete this podcast.

[Beck Bennett]

Delete this. Delete this podcast. That's all I got. People just talking, passing their lives by, talking and talking. Delete this podcast.

[Chelsea Peretti]

The clips aren't funny. You're all laughing in the clip, but the clip is not funny. That makes me so angry. I'm watching you laugh and sell something that is nothing at all.

[Beck Bennett]

Nothing at all.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Not your guys's clips. What other people's clips? Lips.

[Kyle Mooney]

Name names, please.

[Beck Bennett]

Just name a name for us. Name names.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I love to. It's the entirety of the community and everyone is making shitty content. Most people suck.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes. That's perfect.

[Kyle Mooney]

That was great.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

And thank you for saying that.

[Beck Bennett]

I would like to delete. I mean, I had the thought to delete Chris clothes, but I would not.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You be naked, right? I went straight to your dick. You know, you must have a big ass dick boy.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, yeah, that's.

[Kyle Mooney]

Immediately I was like, maybe we can keep Just a little tiny tang. Maybe just keep a.

[Beck Bennett]

Invent a new piece of clothing.

[Kyle Mooney]

Just like something like this.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Guess what?

[Kyle Mooney]

You can use patch.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You can use leaves.

[Beck Bennett]

That.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That would exist in our world, but, like, leaves.

[Kyle Mooney]

The deletion leaves.

[Beck Bennett]

Leaves would be huge in this world.

[Chelsea Peretti]

We.

[Kyle Mooney]

We can't add.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Or. His would be a little tiny leaf.

[Kyle Mooney]

So I have a very tiny guy, but that actually. But that actually has made me better.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And his would be a little tiny leaf of thy. Or rose. Oh, he's crying. He's crying. I'm not crying. He is actually crying, you guys. He actually is crying.

[Beck Bennett]

He cries in most episodes.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, I don't. He's. He's always with me.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I just.

[Kyle Mooney]

Thinking about the whole idea of the podcast.

[Beck Bennett]

It's okay. It's okay.

[Chelsea Peretti]

He's laughing. He really does cry every up.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, he gets. He gets, like, really hurt.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Does he always try to, like, act like he's laughing over.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Rochelle set up this light, and we're not usually in the small studio, so it's, like, affecting me a little bit. But. No, it's.

[Beck Bennett]

It's okay.

[Kyle Mooney]

I was just thinking about what you were saying earlier about all this growing up in Oakland.

[Chelsea Peretti]

God, it's. Why are you so sad? Like, what happened? Oh, because your dick is small. I literally forgot.

[Beck Bennett]

No, no, but I've seen it, and it's f. You have a fantastic one. Have you? No, I don't think I have, actually. I couldn't see it. I looked, but it wasn't there.

[Chelsea Peretti]

So you would delete clothing? One of the best. Arguably one of the best inventions.

[Beck Bennett]

I actually. I take it back. I love clothes. It was just a thought I had. And this is. I just thought. I thought I'd put it out there to the group, see what happens.

[Kyle Mooney]

This is. Is in this timeline, like, clothes. Clothes have existed.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Right?

[Kyle Mooney]

Like. Like, are we reacting to the fact that we no longer have clothes? You know what I'm saying? Because you said I can't have a machine, like a specific cooler made for my ice cream sun.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Right.

[Kyle Mooney]

Which implies that we're like, yeah, you can't. But can. But are we aware that clothes existed in the deletion?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, that's a great question. This is why you would be an asset in an escape room.

[Beck Bennett]

Room. Yeah, I would.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Not joking.

[Kyle Mooney]

I would be honored to someday take part in Escape Room with you. That would be.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, that would be great. We could do an episode of the

[Chelsea Peretti]

podcast in an escape room. I would be cool. Love to do that. A scary one.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Michelle, can we do that?

[Kyle Mooney]

Escape rooms, right?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, I like to do escape rooms.

[Beck Bennett]

Do you think we could do an episode of what's our podcast in an escape room?

[Chelsea Peretti]

I'm sure someone would love to promote their escape room on your podcast.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Okay, Wait. All right, so we should do that. So we have a few spin off podcasts we're planning.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Clothing. So in the world, do you know that clothes once existed and you're like, missing wearing clothes? Or is it just like, suddenly no one misses it? No one has any shame?

[Beck Bennett]

Like. No, I think that's what it is. There's no shame.

[Kyle Mooney]

You want to delete.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That would be a hard one. Why do you want to do that? I guess is the question.

[Beck Bennett]

I just. I think we, like, I don't know, we'd all be like, just a little bit more chill.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Fascinating. Like, I don't go to, like, Korean spas, for example. Like, everyone's like, you go to the Korean spot. I'm like, I don't want to see your pussy. I don't want you to see my.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, that's.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't want a group of people looking at me or to look at them.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, I actually feel the same way.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. It was just kind of a thought exercise.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Interesting. Okay, Kyle. What?

[Kyle Mooney]

I want. Delete.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, what do you want to delete?

[Kyle Mooney]

Well, I said desserts and I got.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, that's right.

[Beck Bennett]

What do you want?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Back to me?

[Beck Bennett]

I. I'll.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Back to me.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, back to me.

[Kyle Mooney]

Back to me.

[Beck Bennett]

I'll delete.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Dyson, hand dryers made me think of it in the bathroom.

[Beck Bennett]

I'm sorry, Hand dryers or hair blow dryers? Like I said, like, like a hand dryer. There are dryers for. Oh, okay. Yeah, I don't use it.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't wash your hands.

[Beck Bennett]

No, I wash my hands. And then I just.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's what I do.

[Beck Bennett]

The water on my pants, literally what I did. I feel. I do feel, like, stupid just standing

[Chelsea Peretti]

there, like, yeah, it takes too long. I just think they're one of those. Those ambitious environmental initiatives that actually, in practice, you're just left wiping your hands on your pants.

[Beck Bennett]

Here's the thing. There are so many gizmos and gadgets for the hands.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Like gloves, mittens, get rid.

[Beck Bennett]

Delete all those. But I'm warmer in the bathroom. In the bathroom, you bring. Just bring a bandana or just wipe it on your pants. No, no hand drying things at all.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Everyone

[Kyle Mooney]

just bring a bandana. Dude, that's like a pump.

[Beck Bennett]

Like, everybody brings it. So seriously, Bring a bandana.

[Kyle Mooney]

Well, I was trying to think if I know anybody. Do you own a bandana?

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, yeah, I got a bunch of bandanas.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, so you got a vested interest.

[Kyle Mooney]

So maybe there's a situation where you bring a bandana.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You bring one every day.

[Beck Bennett]

You. You take the bandana that you're wearing on your neck.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You know what's weird is a lot of your deletions are bringing us to a phase that already happened. There was a time where people carried handkerchiefs all the time and, like, blew their nose on it. Wiped their hands with it.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Wiped their baby's face with it.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Wipe their butt with it.

[Beck Bennett]

I just, I think it's. They're just really good ideas. I. I don't know.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Actually, this was my deletion. The Dyson here. I don't think we need it. I think it was a good idea, but I think it can be beat.

[Beck Bennett]

Okay, what about the, the. The. The little rag thing that's like on a loop, you know, you pull it down.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, yeah. I don't like those either.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, those are.

[Kyle Mooney]

Those are.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, those are bad.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You like them.

[Beck Bennett]

You love those.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't.

[Beck Bennett]

I mean, they're.

[Chelsea Peretti]

They're cute, but I would delete alcohol. No, actually, I was thinking about this.

[Beck Bennett]

So alcohol drink anymore? Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, Used to. Don't anymore. And I was like, would I delete alcohol? But kind of, no. And the reason maybe I just like knowing that it's out there. Should I ever choose to throw my life down the toilet. But also I'm like people drinking alcohol. Like, when you walk by a restaurant where people are all drinking it, or like there's a joie de vivre in the air that I like as a secondhand experience.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes. Even if you're sitting there eating in that environment and you're not drinking, it's still nice to be in that environment.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Except I, you know, I talk about this, but like, people, like, I call it a chardonnay laugh. Like women who have had too much chardonnay in there at, like, restaurants. I would delete that.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, I would too.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I hate people. Certain people, you're just like. Especially once you don't drink. You're just like, oh, my God, shut the up.

[Beck Bennett]

For me, I feel like there's always one voice that cuts through the restaurant. I can't hear anybody else's voice, but it's that. It's that person's voice.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. And it's like. Is that like. What is that? It's like a drill.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I would Delete that voice. The point. Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Certain frequency.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

You can't. It's. It's a higher frequency and it's. It doesn't blend in.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's men too, that it's like.

[Beck Bennett]

And they're like, they're like, they're very excited and they're like pushing it.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah. It's like bring it down several decibels.

[Beck Bennett]

And I think as far as the ramifications, what, we all have a better time.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

We all. We all. We can sit and hear the person across from us.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Well, I mean, I guess the ramifications, Chance is that a number of families lose. Lose their loved ones.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes.

[Kyle Mooney]

Right.

[Beck Bennett]

Just like instantly kind of like the leftovers gone.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And it's like, why? Because of my son's laugh.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Never will I see him again. Just because he talks a little bit loud.

[Beck Bennett]

It's like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

That's how, that's how our podcast.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's like, yeah, that's how the pod works. And also, you had you years to teach him.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Inside voices.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

I want to. I'm like really trying to come up with.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

And I've been focusing on it for a long time and I still have.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yet I have another.

[Kyle Mooney]

There are like, major things that I want to get.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

But it's.

[Beck Bennett]

I feel social media.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, what about parking meters?

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, that'd be great.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, let's get rid of those.

[Kyle Mooney]

But is that. Is that a situation where we just don't need to pay for parking ever?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Great.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Well, that would be amazing. And also the only question though is then is it mayhem them? Like, does the financial thing limit the traffic or like, does it make it that, you know, like, people have to move out of spots after a while? Like, if you take that away, I

[Beck Bennett]

think you're gonna have people like, blocking off spots and asking for payment to park there.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Like just thugs.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, thugs. Parking thugs. They're gonna be like, no, you can't park.

[Kyle Mooney]

Well, that.

[Beck Bennett]

Unless you pay me 20 bucks a meter.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Same as it is now then.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, you pay a meter and it goes to like, kind of of that money goes towards like, what our streets? Like, kind of like.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, because they're all privatized now. Have you noticed this all over meters?

[Beck Bennett]

I didn't realize this is like one

[Chelsea Peretti]

of my major, like, I want to have a class action lawsuit because every. Every meter, you have to scan a thing and every meter is a different company. I'm like, shouldn't this all be through the city of Los Angeles and like, all the Same.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

So every. So they're making money off the meters, and then the city's making money off the. The tickets.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't know.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, I don't know either.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't know. Maybe it's not privatized. It seems like it is. Everyone's like, you.

[Kyle Mooney]

Well, here's. Here's something that bothers me. And I don't know if this is a deletion.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Do you ever walk? This is fully. Maybe off game and not. And not. It doesn't count.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's cool.

[Kyle Mooney]

I'm trying to think of, like, there's There. You were talking about restaurants. There's. There are. Restaurant. There's like a rest. There are restaurant cultural things that happen that really bother me. One thing is this happens at one restaurant I go to somewhat frequently. Walk in. I go in early with my family, and the place is empty. 11:00am yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

They're like, do you have a reservation?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

And it's like, no, no, we don't have a reservation. Okay, well, see if we can find a spot for you. It's like, there's.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Okay, let's give it a look.

[Kyle Mooney]

There's nobody. How do you guys feel? All right, let's send them over to 19.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Every. It's all completely open.

[Kyle Mooney]

So what is that? So what do I delete in that?

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's. Delete the phrase, do you have a reservation?

[Kyle Mooney]

Okay.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And so they just have to say, hi. You're like, hi, I have a reservation under this name. Or you go, there's three of us. Yeah. Delete the question, do you have a reservation? It's unnecessary.

[Kyle Mooney]

And yeah, yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

The person can say what they want. Or is that not satisfying?

[Beck Bennett]

I think, I think I also, like, delete. Delete the, like, delete the. The power trip. Sort of the ego of the host looking around an empty room, being like, maybe we can find something for you. Because in a position of power, delete

[Chelsea Peretti]

the pretense that an empty restaurant.

[Kyle Mooney]

Let's.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Has tables that are all spoken for.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yes. And I almost want to go even broader. And I don't know if I can articulate this well, but, like, delete this thing where, like, we're not talking about reality. You know what I mean? Like the, like, ignoring, like, pleasantries. You and I. Yeah. You and I both know the situation and how silly this sounds. Right?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, I agree with that 100%. And what is that? It's like, delete polite society. Delete polite society.

[Beck Bennett]

Delete polite society.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's like pleasantries. Politeness it's like, yeah, what? What is it?

[Kyle Mooney]

Oh, yeah. I mean, because, like, yeah, you go to the any situation, you're at the market or whatever, and you're like, how you guys been? Good, good, good. How, how's it, how's it going here? How's it been this weekend for you? It's good. We're actually doing pretty well. Yeah, it's kind of. Or slow today, but it'll pick up. Like, it's like, yeah, we don't need that. Right?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, delete, like, humanity.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, delete the humanity. Let's go full robot.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, but I, like, I literally do think small talk is a scourge. Like, yeah, I really struggle with it. And I struggle making eye contact. I struggle thinking, do I look interested? Do I look like I'm bored? Do I look like I don't have that gift? And I always have, like, friends who can just seem so engaged. So sweet. So, So I don't have that gift. I'm like, I connect with people who skip that step, you know?

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Or I'll send someone a text that's like, mid thought. Like, so mid thought. And they're like, good morning.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, right?

[Chelsea Peretti]

And I'm like, oh, right, I have to jump through the good morning group.

[Beck Bennett]

Hey, miss you. I hope everything's been good. Yeah, yeah, no, you don't need to do that.

[Chelsea Peretti]

But also, it's like, you know, when someone's doing that, they're like, hey, good morning. Can I get tickets to your show? It's like, okay, skip the good morning.

[Kyle Mooney]

You're being fake.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, yeah, just ask for what you want.

[Beck Bennett]

I've realized people, like, whether they're like, at a. Working at a restaurant or wherever, like, I will say they're like, hey, how you doing today? And I'll be like, good, how you doing? They'll go, good, thanks for asking. And I'm always kind of like, thanks for asking.

[Chelsea Peretti]

They do like it. A lot of people like it.

[Beck Bennett]

You like it. Why you? Why? I mean, maybe because they've gone all day without anybody asking them, and then they start to feel bad about it. But I'm like, you. You're looking for the chance to say, good, good. You know what I mean? Like, there's not, it's not a real conversation that we're having. But I am surprised how often that people are like, really? Like, wow. Thank you for asking me that.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I know people. Really? Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, please.

[Kyle Mooney]

Sorry.

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, no.

[Kyle Mooney]

I, I, this is, again, this is not following the full parameters that have set up.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Okay.

[Kyle Mooney]

But I've never, I've never exercised this, but I know that when you take like an Uber maybe, or lift, there's the option for like, like, essentially, don't talk to me.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, selecting no conversation.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes, quite right. If we could.

[Kyle Mooney]

If you could maybe have like a pin that could be like green. Like, it's all go. We could talk red.

[Beck Bennett]

Like, I think that's a great idea because we're often having awful days or something awful has happened. And if you have a red, then you could be like, this person doesn't want to talk right now.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You know, I have a joke that's like, when you're in an Uber, is it okay to switch to no conversation mid ride? But. And then there was this, this someone in New York years ago had a joke about, like, how they're like, they want to be like the dogs where you go, not friendly. Which is kind of what you're saying. It's like. Yeah, like, what if it's just like, everyone? Well, this isn't a deletion, though. This is an addition. Like something that indicates if you like small talk or not.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's like, for a different podcast called Additions.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Maybe it's Inventions Editions.

[Beck Bennett]

We could just wear masks, but you

[Chelsea Peretti]

could just delete small talk. But you don't want to deprive, I guess, the people who like it.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

And like. Yeah, by deleting small talk, you can still talk to people, but you got to get. You got to be specific. Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You're like, anyone die recently that you know?

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

Right.

[Chelsea Peretti]

But yeah, I think all my friends are more like that. The people I could be really close to are more actually just like, get straight to it.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And then I think people who don't like that gravitate to people where they just have floral conversations all the time.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah. Well, it's like when I. When you walked in, I was like, I'm telling her the spring roll story. Like, I don't care even if I've already said it.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I was like, that's not small talk. That's big talk.

[Beck Bennett]

And I'm going to ask her about Crow show and like, where that. Where that fell in her life and. Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah. So, yeah, let's get into the stand up things. We got to know how. How does it feel?

[Beck Bennett]

Wait, how does it feel to what

[Kyle Mooney]

to do stand up? Like, kind of the whole. And then the trajectory and the writing and the. And acting. How's. How's it been for you? I'm curious.

[Chelsea Peretti]

This. Yeah. You know, it's been interesting. Yeah, it's, you know, I think that comedy serves a purpose in society in an ideal world. You know, it's. It's a dressing down, perhaps of the status quo. Yes and yes. You know, catharsis. You're saying what people are afraid to say.

[Kyle Mooney]

I find. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sometimes I'll hear. Yeah, I'll hear, you know, somebody say something like that. It's also finding these truths that I think, like. Yeah, sometimes they're hard to say. Sometimes you don't even recognize them until somebody says it out loud.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And it's an interchange, you know, it's an interplay between the audience. It's an interplay between the audience and the comedy maestro. So I'm just laughing, thinking about some. An expression that an audience member had last night. It was pretty funny. But, yeah, they're, you know, they're an active participant. You look out, there's an energy exchange. So I'm on stage. Sure. And I'm the one holding a mic. Yeah. But everyone's energy is contributing to the room. And, you know, for me, you want a good show, you gotta give a lot of energy to get a lot of energy.

[Kyle Mooney]

I feel that. And I gotta say, it's not stand up, but like, you today, Chelsea, have brought such an energy. And I think back on where we began, when we first started talking about deletion and knowing that, like, oh, she's gonna go. She's gonna go for french fries immediately.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You knew it.

[Beck Bennett]

A beloved thing. She's gonna go right for it.

[Kyle Mooney]

To me, you bring some. You bring an energy to this room. Room. And you bring an energy to the conversations you have. And I just want to say, forgive me. You are somebody and you are a force that I will go to the depths of heaven and hell to stop anybody from getting close to deletion on this one. Okay. Okay. Because this is a hero, this is a pioneer, and this is somebody who

[Beck Bennett]

is drinking coffee out of her headgum box.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's. I mean, that means so much to me.

[Beck Bennett]

Great. You know it's true. Oh, yeah. Did you have anything, Anything else?

[Chelsea Peretti]

No, I just, you know, it's weird when you get, you know, two legends.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Total. Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

What are you guys talking about?

[Kyle Mooney]

Nothing. It was just a little sort of inside thing that Chelsea and I have been sort of talking about recently.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah,

[Chelsea Peretti]

man.

[Beck Bennett]

That coffee's good, dude.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah. Well, you got your. Get your own.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Cheers.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, right here.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Cheers, man.

[Beck Bennett]

I'm wearing off.

[Kyle Mooney]

I can't get mine to come off.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's cool, though.

[Beck Bennett]

Cheers.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Cheers. Cheers.

[Beck Bennett]

Well, cheers.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's like little overflowing, overflowing little sake. You know? Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

Can't wait. Oh, there's a mirror in mine.

[Beck Bennett]

I know.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Me too. You look in. There you go.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, hi baby.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Hi baby.

[Kyle Mooney]

Hi, baby.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Hi, baby.

[Kyle Mooney]

Hi, baby.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, little baby. I'm a little baby.

[Kyle Mooney]

Hi. Well, this. That was. This was. Has been deletions. And thanks so much for being here.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah. Don't hit delete yeah on this and see you next week.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, Box around.

[Beck Bennett]

See you at Box around. Perfect. Wow. Deletion.

[Kyle Mooney]

Think about all we we've been through to today song.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

We've deleted french fries and clothes and small talk and lived in that world for a little bit.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And Dyson hand dryers and.

[Beck Bennett]

And Dyson hand dryers.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Shout out to Dyson though.

[Beck Bennett]

Dude, great marketing.

[Chelsea Peretti]

The blow dryers are a. Yes.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes. Love the blow dryer. Do you have. Do you have a. Do you have a little mini one, a little travel one by any chance? No, Saw one of those recently. I think I might have to get one.

[Kyle Mooney]

One.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You blow dry?

[Beck Bennett]

I blow dry. I love it.

[Kyle Mooney]

What?

[Beck Bennett]

You don't think I blow dry? I blow dry.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I don't know why that's funny.

[Beck Bennett]

So what? I blow dry my hair? Aha. Yeah, very funny.

[Kyle Mooney]

Did you blow dry your hair?

[Chelsea Peretti]

He blow dries his hair. You know what, your hair does look great. But I just never in a million years would have guessed it's blow dried.

[Beck Bennett]

What is. What exactly does what.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Just imagining you like in the mirror.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh, I love it. Fluffing it and blowing it and blowing it. Yeah, it's great.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That's cool.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, I think more people should blow dry their hair.

[Chelsea Peretti]

You didn't even talk about your turkey balls. Oh yeah, that was supposed to be a big thing.

[Beck Bennett]

Everybody, just for the end, I have my. These are actually chicken meatballs from Earth Bar. So let's see. I'll do a little unboxing.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, it reeks.

[Beck Bennett]

It does smell.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And oh God, it really is fragrance.

[Beck Bennett]

Delicious looking things.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It looks like dog food. It smells like dog food.

[Beck Bennett]

Carrots in there.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And you all know what that means.

[Beck Bennett]

It's dog food.

[Chelsea Peretti]

It's dog food.

[Beck Bennett]

There's nothing. There's nothing wrong with eating dog food. Color. Are you gonna. Are you playing this out?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Garlic in there.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, I got, I got, I got something here.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Okay, wait, are we supposed to have our. Oh God.

[Beck Bennett]

Oh. Wait, wait.

[Kyle Mooney]

You can go whenever you want. You add more sounds.

[Beck Bennett]

No, here. No, that's perfect. God, we've had some Fun today God, we've had some fun oh, God, we've had some fun today on the podcast Chelsea came and brought the goods and Kyle and Beck tried to keep up thank God we had some fun on the pod today on the pod today.

[Chelsea Peretti]

On the pod today I came to play on the pod today on the

[Beck Bennett]

pod we had some fun today on the pod today Game to play on

[Chelsea Peretti]

the pod today Delete Trying to find

[Beck Bennett]

my way Delete came to me Press delete, Delete Try to find my way I was.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, I was just deleting everything I did.

[Beck Bennett]

No, no, I was just joking. She started saying, no, no, no, it's all good.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I wasn't saying delete.

[Beck Bennett]

I was.

[Chelsea Peretti]

I was adding texture. Not like saying delete.

[Beck Bennett]

And I.

[Kyle Mooney]

There's nothing about this that's cringe, is there?

[Beck Bennett]

No.

[Chelsea Peretti]

The whole podcast.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah.

[Kyle Mooney]

So do you have anything you want to promote?

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, God. I was going to tell you at the beginning not to ask that. I'll be probably touring in the fall unless I succumb to darkness.

[Beck Bennett]

Yeah, yeah, that'll.

[Chelsea Peretti]

That can happen. And then, you know, go on my Instagram. I think it's Chelsanity.

[Kyle Mooney]

Yeah, that's right. That's right.

[Chelsea Peretti]

And listen to my podcast. It's called Call Chelsea Peretti. I take calls, so you could also call in. Yeah, we just talk about some random ass.

[Beck Bennett]

You just go off the rails, dude. It's great.

[Kyle Mooney]

Chelsanity is such a great, great handle, too.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah, I was pretty psyched on that. That's. That's one of the benefits of being old. You get in early on the Internet. Also.

[Beck Bennett]

Also my Coffee.

[Chelsea Peretti]

My Coffee album. You can listen to that.

[Beck Bennett]

Yes, yes.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

All right, take care, everybody.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Oh, I also made a movie. Oh, you can watch it. I think it's, like, streaming all over the place. It's called Firsttime Female Director.

[Beck Bennett]

Go check it out.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Thanks.

[Kyle Mooney]

Go see it. Thanks, guys.

[Beck Bennett]

Thank you, guys. God, we had some fun.

[Kyle Mooney]

What's Our Podcast is a headgun podcast created and hosted by Beck Bennett and Kyle Mooney.

[Beck Bennett]

The show is produced and engineered by Richelle Chen and Anya Kanovskaya, with production support from Ali Khan and Ryan Lutzow.

[Kyle Mooney]

Our executive producer is Anya Kanefskaya. Katie Moose is our VP of content at Headgum. Our theme music is made by us.

[Beck Bennett]

For more podcasts by headgum, visit headcum.com or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Hello, I'm Johnny Knoxville. And I'm Jeff Tremaine. Welcome to Jackass, the Podcast, a new show coming to. Coming to that's what it is. Hello, I'm Johnny Knoxville.

[Kyle Mooney]

And I'm Jeff Tremaine.

[Beck Bennett]

Welcome to Jackass the Podcast, a new show now on Headgum.

[Kyle Mooney]

I've learned a Jackass movie has to

[Beck Bennett]

be really 90 minutes. Every minute the of over is admitted. Too long, apparently. There's only so much butthole you can take. We're going to take you behind the scenes of our entire history. All the best bits, bad behavior and even worse decisions. All of it. Sometimes we don't make the right decisions, Jeff. I've noticed that every every so often with guests like Spike Jones. I think let's commit to Jackass the Podcast.

[Kyle Mooney]

What was it going to be called?

[Beck Bennett]

The Jackass Podcast. Without you, the IQ drops significantly. Steve O.

[Kyle Mooney]

There's a strong chance that were it

[Chelsea Peretti]

not for Jackass, that I would be in clown makeup right this minute.

[Beck Bennett]

Chris Pontius, that shot of your butt just cruising up, I'm like, yeah, I got that on tv. God bless us. Dave England.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Yeah.

[Beck Bennett]

When you come in and you're being really nice, they're like, damn it. Something bad's gonna happen to me. Wee man. Jeff grabbed me from the back of the head and threw a punch.

[Kyle Mooney]

The whole bar just stopped and wanted

[Beck Bennett]

to kill me, like. And some of the crew that's been with us from the beginning. I had to share a room with this guy, and I left a nice surprise in the toilet for him every time. Apparently, he hates to flush. Subscribe to Jackass the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcast, Pocket Cast, or wherever the hell hell you get podcasts. Our new episodes drop on June 18th. Woo.

[Kyle Mooney]

Look out for new episodes in your feed every Thursday.

[Beck Bennett]

Watch video episodes on YouTube and follow along with us on Instagram and tick tock at Jackass the Podcast. What were we just talking about? Probably buttholes.

[Kyle Mooney]

Hi, I am Mandy Moore.

[Beck Bennett]

Sterling K. Brown. And I'm Chris Sullivan. And we host the podcast that was us now on Head.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Each episode we're gonna go into a

[Kyle Mooney]

deep dive from our show.

[Beck Bennett]

This is us. That's right.

[Kyle Mooney]

We're gonna go episode by episode. We're also gonna pepper in episodes with

[Chelsea Peretti]

different guest stars and writers and casting directors.

[Beck Bennett]

Are we gonna cry? Yes. Little bit. Are we gonna laugh a lot?

[Chelsea Peretti]

A whole lot.

[Beck Bennett]

That's what I'm hoping, man.

[Chelsea Peretti]

Listen to.

[Beck Bennett]

That was us on your favorite podcast app. Or watch full video episodes on YouTube or Spotify. New episodes every Tuesday.