Johnny Pemberton

Summary

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What's Our Podcast? with Beck Bennett and Kyle Mooney

Episode: Johnny Pemberton (April 29, 2026 – Headgum)

Episode Overview

This episode features comedian, actor, and writer Johnny Pemberton as Beck and Kyle’s guest, aiming to finally determine what their podcast should be about. It’s an episode packed with nostalgia, industry stories, and an extended improv segment where the trio (in exaggerated Italian-American personas) try out Johnny’s podcast concept suggestion ("When You’re Here, Your Family"). The conversational style is loose and playful, filled with bits, affectionate roasting, and asides about their careers, family, and vintage LA comedy scene, making it an entertaining listen for fans of alternative comedy or anyone in the orbit of SNL or indie comedy.

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Major Discussion Points & Highlights

1. Patreon Launch and Community Building

• [02:49 – 04:30] Beck and Kyle announce their new Patreon tiers:
  • $5/month: Bonus weekly “Sloppin’ Out” episodes (just Beck and Kyle riffing)
  • $10/month: Pitch podcast ideas; access to exclusive Discord; video “sillies” (homemade comedy bits)
  • $15/month: All previous tiers + free access to quarterly ticketed livestreams; annual subscribers get a side headshot of Beck and Kyle

"It's gonna be a place to see some really weird, wild and crazy stuff where we just get to do whatever we want." – Kyle [05:23]

2. Banter, Absurdity & Nostalgia

• [06:03 – 10:00] Beck and Kyle riff on daily oddities (swatting at invisible “tiny white men”), weird workplace stories (loud celebrity Zoom calls), and vintage thrift shopping.

"I saw like a little white... little white man." – Kyle [06:27]

3. Life Updates (including wild fictional stories)

• [10:14 – 13:29] Kyle introduces a recurring surrealist bit about finding his secret twin brother “BR,” who is leaving a dangerous gang called The Blasters, echoing television gang drama tropes for comic effect.

"He is a blaster... They built their own cannon-like weapons... and they go around town blasting stores, blasting people, blasting things." – Kyle [12:13]

4. Thrift/Vintage Fits and Comedy Scene Memories

• [14:00 – 17:52] Beck talks up his new thrifted outfit from Florida, and the group reminisces about classic thrifting, vintage Levi’s, Lee, “dungarees,” and ‘90s pop culture apparel.

"This fit me, like, perfect right off the rack. And I've been hitting up more vintage stuff, and I want more fun..." – Beck [17:25]

5. The Value of Podcast Rituals & Listener Feedback

• [19:17 – 20:21] Kyle brings up that listeners crave consistency and love their recurring podcast theme songs, grounding the show in fan interaction.

"You have to keep it. I look forward to it." – Kyle, relaying listener feedback [20:06]

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The Johnny Pemberton Conversation

6. Introducing Johnny Pemberton

• [23:34 – 23:38] The hosts warmly introduce Johnny as a longtime friend—“charming, hilarious, sweet, raspy voiced”—with timely plugs for his new indie film “Mermaid” and a role on the series "Fallout."

7. “Mermaid” Discussion: Indie Filmmaking, Q&As, and Genre Blending

• [29:53 – 33:14]
  • Johnny describes the premise, vibe, and genre ambiguity of "Mermaid" (“It’s not a horror movie, but has horror elements…maybe like Splash meets Lars and the Real Girl or a Florida E.T.”)
  • Talks about the unique challenges and comedy of participating in festival or industry Q&As.

"Q and A, though? I get kind of bitty because I got. You got it. Because otherwise I don't want to seem like some... if you're a comedic actor..." – Johnny [37:59]

• A memorable on-set anecdote featuring Kevin Nealon's water bottle [37:19]

8. Comedy Roots and LA Scene

• [34:08 – 36:23]
  • Reminiscing over mid-2000s LA alternative comedy scene: open mics, Ramada Inn shows, early credits and temp jobs.

"There's so many people that we know who are like... so famous. It's really absurd." – Johnny [34:12]

9. Johnny’s Many Hobbies: Beer Brewing, Cider, and Gardening

• [43:27 – 47:08]
  • Johnny shares details about brewing beer, making cider, and his enthusiasm for gardening and DIY projects.
  • History tangent: Apples and cider, Johnny Appleseed’s crusade for booze, and the temperance movement.

"You know Johnny Appleseed? His whole thing, those apples he was planting, they're not for eating, they're for making cider. He was a drunk. He was a Calvinist drunk." – Johnny [45:52]

10. Music and Record Collecting (and the Power of Distraction)

• [50:32 – 54:31]
  • Johnny’s obsession with collecting reggae and soul records, working at a record store in Tallahassee, the rise of new genres (rocksteady into reggae).
  • Delves into his experience with ulcerative colitis, using DJing/collecting as a mental health distraction, and themes of his comedy special.

"I have a bowel disease... I have ulcerative colitis... The show I wrote, it's all about. Because I have a bowel disease... how I got really into reggae at one point... so I didn't have to think about how I felt." – Johnny [53:02]

• On why reggae: the music’s “parallel universe” quality and transformative immersion.

11. The Evolution of Comedy Careers & Industry Frustrations

• [57:32 – 59:22]
  • The hosts and Johnny reminisce about their early career hustle and collective struggle for respect, the constant fear of irrelevance, and shifts in comedy culture due to technology.

"And I don't know if you're... If we all are dealing with age and, like, kind of, oh, we are. We're over 40 and, like, we've become grownups..." – Kyle [59:22]

12. Social Media as Modern Burden

• [60:05 – 61:04]
  • Johnny laments the necessity and emotional toll of social media for comedians, referencing the algorithm’s opacity and pay-to-play model.

"You want to reach all your followers? OK, so look, here's the deal. You can pay the bank, but old Tony over here, you know, nobody knocks off old Tony." – Johnny [61:04]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [33:43] On casting in “Mermaid”:

  "You find a little creature... and kind of form a relationship with it. Wow, that's funny. Yeah, it is kind of an E.T...like a Florida E.T." – Johnny

• [37:19] “Set Pranks”

  "A water bottle. It was not my water bottle. I drank from it and then later I found out it was not mine. And Kevin Nealon, who's in the film... did you drink my water bottle? And I said, did I?" – Johnny

• [45:52] Johnny Appleseed as Drunk:

  (see above)

• [71:45] Voice compliments:

  "Your voice... that slightly raspy thing that is, like, so appealing... there's something that's just like, I got a little crush on Johnny." – Beck

• [74:03] On people who can’t visualize:

  "There's people who, like, say, think of an apple. And right now we're all like, yeah, I can see an apple in my head. There's people who like, what are you talking about?" – Johnny

• [81:21, 81:30, 85:58, 88:44] Improvised Italian-American Cousin podcast:
  The episode’s highlight is the prolonged improv segment where Beck, Kyle, and Johnny dive into their Italian-American alter egos, sassing about pasta, family, and podcast grievances—each riff escalating in ridiculousness.

  "When you're here, your family. That's my original idea." – Johnny [79:46]
  "Every day, you gotta do the day. Doesn't matter what comes your way. You say, hey, today I'm doing the day. I get out of my frickin way." – Johnny as “Cousin Gallo” [92:18]

• [101:15] On method acting for “Mermaid”:

  "It was a hard character to get out of, honestly. Took me a couple months... I became, like, someone very different than who I normally am because I had to slow down so much, and... I just started living in that." – Johnny

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Extended Improv: “When You’re Here, Your Family”

[78:16 – 98:29]

• Johnny proposes a podcast about Italian cooking and family called “When You’re Here, Your Family.”
• All three embody over-the-top Italian-American family members—“Gallo,” “Brioni,” “Kylino”.
• They passionately argue about pasta shapes (penne vs. angel hair vs. cavatappi), sauces, Nona’s secret recipes, podcasting struggles, and “viral clip” jealousy.
• The improv is affectionate, absurd, and self-referential—riffing on stereotypes and showbiz hustle while parodying the podcast genre itself.

"If you're coming after their Nona's recipe, you're gonna have to walk through a fricking wall called my dick." – Johnny as Gallo [98:14]

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End-of-Episode Reflections

The group decompresses, pokes fun at their Italian-American improv, and circles back to nostalgia for earlier days in comedy, their friendship, and Johnny’s strengths as a performer.

"It is always so great to see you because we do have that connection – how we all kind of like..." – Beck [100:25]

"I've always loved your comedy and I think a great pillar even back then." – Kyle [100:33]

Johnny promotes his film “Mermaid” and “Fallout” role, and the hosts plug their Patreon as a “chill thing” for real fans.

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Important Timestamps

• 02:49 — Patreon announcement and tiers
• 06:27 — Kyle’s “tiny white man” story
• 10:14 — “Found my twin brother” bit (BR and the Blasters)
• 23:34 — Introduction of Johnny Pemberton
• 29:53 — “Mermaid” film discussion, Q&A anecdotes
• 43:27 — Johnny’s crafting/DIY hobbies and cider brewing
• 50:32 — Record collecting & reggae obsession
• 81:21 — Start of “When You’re Here, Your Family” Italian improv
• 97:51 — Closing arguments about Nona’s recipe and family
• 100:17 — Reflections on comedy scene nostalgia
• 101:13 — Johnny’s method acting “Mermaid” process

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Takeaways for New Listeners

• The podcast thrives on improvisation, rapport, nostalgia, and affectionate mockery.
• Johnny Pemberton is highlighted not just for his comic abilities, but as a genuinely creative, eclectic friend with deep roots in the LA comedy scene.
• The “figuring out what the podcast is about” conceit allows for playful, meta-humor and evolving formats, with plenty of room for their comedy friends to shine.
• For fans, this episode delivers a rare blend of deep-dive career catchups and unhinged, character-driven improvisation.

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Notable Moment:
[98:14] Johnny (as Cousin Gallo):

"If you're coming after their Nona's recipe, you're gonna have to walk through a fricking wall called my dick."

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For further interaction:

• Watch full episodes on YouTube
• Join the community and contribute podcast ideas on their Patreon

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Summary prepared in the chaotic, affectionate spirit of Beck, Kyle, and Johnny Pemberton.

Transcript

[A]

This is a headgun podcast. The Tainted Cup.

[B]

Ah, time for the Tainted Cup.

[A]

Meet your favorite detective duo. In the Tank by Robert Jackson Bennett. Oh, Robert, you've done it again.

[B]

My Uncle Robert would always. He was always telling stories when I was growing up, and he would always have these mysteries. I was way too young for them, but he was always telling me about the taint. He goes, it's a fantasy murder mystery starring Anna, if I remember correctly, from.

[A]

What is it Anna or Anna?

[B]

I think it's Anna. Yeah, I think it's Anna. And she's an eccentric detective who prefers to work blindfolded, if I remember correctly. And Din, her magically altered assistant.

[A]

Well, Din.

[B]

Din sounds a little bit like this, doesn't he?

[A]

Dinner. Help me put my blindfold on.

[B]

Of course. Of course. Of course.

[C]

Tim,

[B]

That's a little wet. Yeah. That's a little sample of what you might read in the Tainted Cup.

[A]

Tainted cup won the 2025 Hugo Award and the World Fantasy Award for best novel. That is huge.

[B]

Oh, no, dude, I haven't won.

[A]

Jack. I see all these people winning Webbies and. Yeah, the. Have we done. Yeah, here we are.

[B]

Done anything.

[A]

Every single day working on this stuff.

[B]

Yeah. And we're not winning anything, but so is the point. Got your grapes? For those who can't see, Kyle's got his grapes.

[A]

The.

[B]

The. And he ate them. These are plastic grapes that are in the studio for everybody. And he's not going to clean these. He's just going to be covered in his garbage.

[A]

Covered in his goo.

[B]

But, you know, there's impeccable banter and in the book. The Tainted cup and a plot that's equal parts fun and twisty. The Tainted cup will keep turning pages deep into the night. The New York Times Book Review calls it a thoroughly satisfying delight from start to finish. And when you do finish, the next book in the series will be waiting for you. Kyle's eating his grapes again. The Tainted cup by Robert Jackson Bennett is available in print and audio everywhere. Books are sold, and they can't wait for you to finish the Tainted cup and to start again and to finish and to start again and to finish and to start again and to finish and to start again and on and on.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

Yay.

[B]

Another episode of what's our Podcast. But first, a little special announcement from Beck and Kyle.

[A]

This is very big. This is.

[B]

It's very huge and big.

[A]

I think this is life changing for me.

[B]

Yeah. As long as it goes well.

[A]

Well, even if it doesn't, it is altering my life.

[B]

Yeah, it already has.

[A]

The big announcement is we are starting a Patreon.

[B]

Yes. You're saying to yourself, oh, yes, it was.

[A]

You know, it was a risk. It was a swing to even start a podcast together back.

[B]

Yes, it was.

[A]

We didn't know what it is. We still are finding out what it is every single week when we come together with our guests. And when you and I sort of mess around on the microphone.

[B]

Let's tell them what it is. For the first tier, Rocco Basics here,

[A]

it's five bucks a month. You're going to get a bonus episode every week. No guest. Okay. It's just Beck and I doing what we've been doing Since September of 2003 when we first met each other.

[B]

For that tier, we have Sloppin out, which is just the two of us hanging out with each other.

[A]

It's like our intro to our show.

[B]

Yeah, but it's longer. We can go into bits longer.

[A]

We'll just be earnest. Learn about each other's lives.

[B]

Yes. Catch up for longer. Or we also have what's yous Podcast, where we take ideas from our Patreon members at a certain tier. At the $10 tier, which is the next tier, we take your ideas and we try that podcast out. Right, but you can pitch those ideas at the $10 tier.

[A]

Yes. For 10. Once you get to the $10 tier, premium rock. We're calling Rocco Premium.

[B]

Rocco Premium.

[A]

That's where you actually get to pitch the ideas that we will do on our podcast. You're also going to get access to an exclusive chat. A chat room. Yes, the Discord. The Rocco Discord, where you can talk with other fans, other listeners do probably kind of do your own little bits. Make some friends. Maybe. Maybe you can grab. Grab dinner or coffee with one of them sometime.

[B]

Also with the $10 tier, you get access to. You get to see our. What we're calling our sillies. Yes.

[A]

These are little videos. You know, we came up making videos together, full circle. Because now you and I are just gonna make a little video we've already started. Get a little iPhone, make a little video, play some characters, do some bits.

[B]

Just come up with an idea and pop it right off and just shoot.

[A]

Yeah, we don't need to labor over it.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. We just kind of have fun and pump it out to our Rocco's. You know what I mean?

[A]

I know exactly what you mean, and I love it.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

For 15 bucks, you get all that stuff, plus you get free access to our new ticketed livestream. So, like, we will Talk to you directly. You can ask us questions. We'll be doing these quarterly throughout the year.

[B]

We might do poppers there. We don't know yet. It's only gonna be legal stuff. But we're gonna have fun.

[A]

We have to do poppers.

[B]

Yes. And here's the thing for Rocket supreme, if you sign up for a full year, you'll get a side headshot of me and Kyle. Yeah, we don't know rave gear, but it's going to be an amazing family heirloom that you get and you can, you know, frame it and put above the fireplace or something or something like that.

[A]

It is really going to be fun. I think it's going to be a place to see some really weird, wild and crazy stuff where we just get

[B]

to do whatever we want without really caring. So. Yeah. So go to patreon.com what's our podcast? And join today, please.

[A]

That's patreon.com what's our Podcast? And be in the Rocco Club with all your fellow Roccos.

[B]

What's our podcast? What's it gonna be all about? Tell us what's our podcast. What should we talk about with Beck and Kyle?

[A]

Dude. Okay,

[B]

here we. Okay, so here we are. Yeah.

[A]

Okay. Welcome to what's Our Podcast? I'm Kyle Mooney.

[B]

I'm Beck Bennett.

[A]

And this is the show where we bring in a guest to figure out what our podcast should be.

[B]

Who knows what it's going to be? And that is the podcast. Yes. Yeah. So if anybody's listening right now, as a her as he never seen our podcast, me and Kyle are going to try to figure out what our podcast is. No, but it's just kind of Kyle's just swatting at the air right now. For people who can't is not watching this on YouTube. Kyle's. What did you. What were you swatting at, Kyle? Were you just.

[A]

I saw. And this is going to be. I feel like some of the listeners or viewers might not believe this. I saw like a little. It almost looked like a little white. Little white man.

[B]

Oh, like, you saw what, a head and arms, legs.

[A]

I couldn't. I couldn't. It was so tiny. I couldn't make out what the.

[B]

So maybe it was just like a piece of lint or something.

[A]

I can't tell. You know, I feel like, you know, people see UFOs or whatever.

[B]

Right.

[A]

They're like, oh.

[B]

Or see Jesus in the toes.

[A]

Yes. After the fact. It's like, oh, that was just an airplane. Or like, you know, some piano. Yeah.

[B]

A piece of piano scooting around.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

[B]

Right.

[A]

I can't say what I saw. I can't say what I. What I thought I saw was really what it is. But, like, to me, it was a little white man.

[B]

Wow. And so, like, are you feeling kind of like, wow, I just saw.

[A]

It does make you feel like, what is out there? You know? Like, you know. You know? You know, because we can only see so much. Right. Do you know when you.

[B]

I think we can only see one person. Yeah. I think we could only see 1% of the world. Yeah. With our senses.

[A]

And I've heard that about the ocean. Like, we haven't even, like, discovered any of it.

[B]

I know.

[A]

Because you think. Give me one second.

[B]

Jacques Cousteau. Yeah.

[A]

Give me one second and then I'll be done. And then I'll watch you, and then I want you to say all the stuff.

[B]

Yeah. Okay. Yeah, Yeah.

[A]

I want to hear more about Jacques Cousteau.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But give me one second.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Are you ready me to go?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Do you know in your bedroom.

[B]

So Jacques Cousteau was this. Like, he was.

[A]

I know that you're with you right now. If you are, if I find out you're actually with me, I. I promise I will do things. I will do things that will really make you regret that.

[B]

Ooh, Now I'm kind of interested. Maybe I should test the waters. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Ah, yes.

[B]

Ooh.

[A]

Give it to me, give it to

[B]

me, give it to me. I want to be told what to do. I like being a little hog. Wow, that escalated quickly.

[C]

The.

[A]

Yo.

[B]

The.

[A]

The man you got. You walk the gears. You. You got some messed up happening there, man. Yeah.

[B]

You cut to the inside of my brain, and it's just a hamster going on a wheel.

[A]

And you cut to the inside of my brain, and it's.

[B]

And it's.

[A]

It's.

[B]

It's a flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers drumming.

[C]

What's going on, Anthony?

[A]

And then it's. And then now.

[B]

What's this noise?

[A]

Rochelle dropped something or something happened.

[B]

Do we hear this noise?

[A]

There's all sorts of noises. Because all of a sudden, Rochelle's moving around like. Like we don't exist.

[B]

Exactly, exactly.

[A]

You got a podcast over there. I actually heard some guy, a very prom, unknown entity, a famous person.

[B]

Person. Wow.

[A]

In the middle of this studio.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Just taking a loud ass zoom.

[B]

Oh, wow.

[A]

Did you see this, Rochelle?

[B]

I didn't see who it was. And this is a famous person. Can you say the name?

[A]

No, but they are taking a lot of zoom. And I'm wondering. And I'm seeing other people in the office. Like, one person has to be in the kitchen. One person is sort of trying to do their other thing. It's like you can't get any work done when somebody's having the zoom as loud as this person. And everybody can get. You can leave your guesses in the comments.

[B]

Ooh. Okay. Okay. All right. Maybe it's like John or maybe Jim or. I don't know. I was just trying to guess their name.

[A]

I see.

[B]

Let's cut that because. Yeah, that's. I don't want to get any trouble with John or Jim.

[A]

I think it'll be fine. There's so many. Dude, there's so many Johns and Jim's out there.

[B]

I know, I know. They're all like. Yeah, they're all just doing their thing.

[A]

I have been.

[B]

What's been going on with you?

[A]

Okay, update. Personal update.

[B]

Okay, life update.

[A]

Life update. I found my twin brother.

[B]

No.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

I didn't know you were looking for him.

[A]

I have been for several years. I actually have told you about this.

[B]

I don't recall. I don't recall you telling me about your twin brother.

[A]

I finally met him.

[B]

Dude. What's his name?

[A]

Only his name is Brian.

[B]

Br. Is that. Is that an initial or is it

[A]

Bradley Richards when he goes by br? And I've been looking for. The only information I had was that his name was his. Was that his name was br.

[B]

Yeah, Brian.

[A]

And that he lives in. I knew. I knew br.

[B]

Yes, I knew. We know that part. So then what was the other part that you know?

[A]

And that he lives in

[B]

A.

[A]

What?

[B]

A1.

[A]

He lives. He lives in. He lives. His name is br.

[B]

Yeah, I know that. We all know that. That's. Yeah. So what's the other piece? Where does he live?

[A]

He lives with a partner.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Named Jade. Jade Indalia. So I knew his partner, but I had to. But I didn't know where they were located. So I've located BR and Jade Rudelia. They are actually not far. They're in la, the larger LA County. They're in Monrovia, and I've located them. And I found out what he does for a living with which is very intriguing.

[B]

What?

[A]

He is a blaster.

[B]

BR is a blaster. Your twin VR is a blaster? Yes. Nobody knows what that means. No. Did you know what that means?

[A]

I did not. I've just become aware of the blaster community.

[B]

Okay. Yeah. So these are people who,

[A]

I guess they have these large home they. They built Their own weapon, like, kind of cannon, like weapons. They call them Blasters.

[B]

Cool.

[A]

And they go around town blasting stores, blasting people, blasting things.

[B]

So it's kind of like a. It's illegal.

[A]

It's a little bit of a gang.

[B]

It's.

[A]

They're a gang called the Blasters. BR is leaving the Blasters.

[B]

Your twin BR is leaving the Blasters.

[A]

Jade Ridalia is staying with the Blasters. So they've been having. So that's part of the reason I was able to connect with them is he's finally leaving the Blasters. And for our family, it is such a relief. Wow.

[B]

I'm so happy for you. I've known you a long time and I've never known about PR or any of that. I guess he's been with the Blasters a long time.

[A]

Yes. Yeah. And congrats, man.

[B]

I'm so happy for you. You're going to have your twin brother back.

[A]

Jade Rodelia is after us. She's aware. And I probably made a mistake by mentioning her name on the podcast.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I would think because it is.

[A]

There is a chance that she will come out for she will come after any of us, along with the Blaster squad, which could be trouble.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But I think. But BR is very smart. So I'm. I am hopeful that we will figure out the J.

[B]

Rid Elliot and Blaster to shake the Blasters.

[A]

How have you been?

[B]

Well, funny you ask, because I just finished watching. Watching Task and this is reminding me of Task.

[A]

Oh, really? I don't know much about that.

[B]

I think the Black Rabbit gang or something. It's a motorcycle gang and two brothers get involved in a gang and one, you know, there's some trouble and the gang comes after him and the family and he's trying to get at the gang.

[A]

Sounds just like something that would happen with BR and the bl.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, exactly. You should watch T. Okay. You're kind of the. Yeah.

[A]

I wanted to tell you something else.

[B]

Okay. Yeah. Oh, I. Real quick.

[A]

Please.

[B]

Oh, no, you. Florida. Yeah. I want this whole outfit. Why don't you guys go check out the thumbnail on the YouTube. This whole outfit I got yesterday in Florida, in Naples, Florida.

[A]

Do you want to read it?

[B]

What's on this one? The shirt. It's a long sleeve shirt, blue shirt that says lapham Peak color. What is it? Colorama. What does that say? Can you see? I'm looking at it backwards.

[A]

Colorama Run Walk.

[B]

Colorama Colorama runwalk. Yeah. So the sponsors on the. It's got the sponsors. Yeah, we got one over here that says in memory of Bob Sugden. Oh, yeah. So much respect to.

[A]

I'm just imagining.

[B]

It's not funny that Bob is no longer with us. It's funny that it says that on my shirt. And I don't know, you're like kind

[A]

of like paying tribute to somebody.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, like, honestly, like, maybe this is a clip and people. Or maybe somebody reached out and like, I know Bob and that's very nice to have him mentioned to be a part of a shirt. Like, this is pretty incredible.

[A]

I think he was probably well respected if he.

[B]

Yeah. Cuz look at all these brands over here. You got. Yeah. So it's a fun shirt. Nice color. These pants kind of whitish. They're Lee. They're Lee. Oh, yeah. They're kind of an off white. They're a little dirty. They're a little dirty. And it's kind of.

[A]

I think I didn't hear you the first time.

[B]

Lee. Lee.

[A]

I understand. It's like, it's a short name and word.

[B]

It's a classic brand, like Wrangler. Dungaroos.

[A]

Why are you talking down to me? Dungaroos is a. Is a. Is a sweets. That's a snack.

[B]

Okay, so what's the gene? Oshkosh. What dungar is it? Dungaroos. What is it? Dungaroos. Dungaroo.

[A]

Maybe I'm thinking of Dunkaroos. Dung. Dungarees. Dungarees.

[B]

And. And dung. Dung. Dungarees are where they make dung in the.

[A]

Right. Right.

[B]

Dungarees.

[A]

I work at a dungary. Yeah.

[B]

I shovel the dung at a dungary

[A]

I've been working at. I've been working at this dungary for the past 40 years.

[B]

I got dung lung. My. I've been breathing out the D walk.

[A]

Dungaree. My grandpabby will get a dungaree. And I hope my channel will get a dungaree.

[B]

Hopefully the new president's gonna open up all the old dungarees again. I don't know of any other skills besides working at a dungaree.

[A]

We're a dungaree town. And this team was having this town. Very sad.

[B]

This house is not doing too well. It used to be in the heyday of the dungarees, it used to be so good.

[A]

You come here, get your young maid, go to your jungle. Now you can't even get a nice pair of dung.

[B]

Now what is it? Dungaroos.

[A]

Dungarees is a name for pants, but I don't think it's a brand. Nothing. A brand. That sounds like Rochelle. Can't Find it.

[B]

No, it's okay.

[A]

Wait, wait.

[B]

We're all over the place. I was in Florida. Yes. This is all a new outfit, and I'm feeling fine.

[A]

Nice. That's great that you. That you feel good. I love that.

[B]

Yeah. Well, I'm just, you know, you. I feel like you wear a new shirt every time.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I've worn this one once before, but that's. That's good to hear.

[B]

I get. I. Can I be honest? I. You have. You have influenced me. I. I want. I've. I've been wanting to buy more thrift clothes, vintage clothes. I used to, but it's kind of a pain in the ass. Because you have to search.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

You have to find stuff you like, and then when you find stuff you like, that probably won't fit that well.

[A]

Right.

[B]

This fit me, like, perfect right off the rack. And I've been hitting up more vintage stuff, and I want more fun. I wore you guys. Okay, this is a little peek behind the curtain. The. The. What's. Our podcast crew complimented my pink rugby shirt that I wore in the Air Condre episode, and I liked it. And that's something I didn't bring out because it was big pop of color. Thought it was a risk, but people liked it. Yeah, I liked it, too. So now I'm trying to bring more color into my life.

[A]

To me, it was given in the best way. Zack Morris vibes.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

[A]

One thing I want to say. Is there a guest here? Oh, great. Oh, we. We.

[B]

Oh, you can slop out a little bit.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Oh. If you want to know what slapping out is.

[A]

Oh, yes.

[B]

Yep. Yep.

[A]

We got Patreon, because today we did our very. We went on the Discord and watched the premiere of our first Slapping out episode. And Beck, by the way, for the listener, he is just. He's throwing his microphone. He's, like, moving it back and forth, forth and, like, whacking his mouth with it.

[B]

I don't know why. I didn't mean to interrupt you. I just.

[A]

No, no, I can imagine. That should be its own clip. It's just you getting the microphone going.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

Like. Because it was.

[B]

Please, podcast gods, please deliver me. That's this clip.

[A]

And that would be.

[B]

That.

[A]

I think that would be really amazing because I think of, like, things that I've seen floating around, and that is one I've not seen.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I. If you add sound effects to it and.

[B]

Oh, like a different sound effect, people can put in their own sound effects maybe, too.

[A]

That's a fun contest.

[B]

Like, it could be farts. Excuse me? Or it could be like, an ax. Or.

[A]

Wait, my daughter does that. Like, her coughs are so intense.

[C]

Really?

[B]

She coughs like that?

[A]

I mean, like, not full.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But it'll just be like, you know, like, oof.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, I know what you're talking about. You were gonna say something, though.

[A]

Yes. Okay, so I'm not gonna. I'm not. I want to keep everybody's identity mysterious and vague and, well, I think they

[B]

know you're Kyle Mooney. I'm back Bennett Hardy Har.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Well, okay, we can cut.

[A]

Not. Which I'm not actually happy you said out loud because of Jade Rodelia.

[B]

Oh, yes.

[A]

Probably.

[B]

They're probably tracking you right now. Probably listening to this podcast and turning around and driving right towards you.

[A]

But, um, I was told.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

By a listener of our show.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Who works at the school that our kids go to, actually.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

That I think during the Adam Devine episode, we maybe talked about or joked about not doing the theme song for the podcast within a podcast.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Which maybe were showy. Maybe you talked us into doing it.

[B]

I don't remember.

[A]

I didn't watch the episode. But she told me, she's like, you have to keep it. I look forward to it.

[B]

I feel like people online have said, like, you have to keep it. Like, I think that's something they get really excited about.

[A]

Okay. So there you go.

[B]

And what do you think it is? Is it because, like, we get it. I get it wrong a lot or we don't know how. Just the.

[A]

It might be some of the charm of the fact that it sounds.

[B]

It's always kind of a.

[A]

You're doing great, Yo.

[B]

I'm doing amazing. Yeah. But that's good to know.

[A]

Yeah. We have a great guest today.

[B]

We do. An old friend of ours, Johnny Pemberton. The hilarious. Funny. Hilarious and funny. Charming. Sweet. What?

[A]

But I didn't get to explain what our Patreon experience was.

[B]

Oh, okay. You want to go into it real quick?

[A]

Very quickly.

[B]

Okay, very quick.

[A]

So we. Yeah, we debuted our. An episode from our series, Slopping out, which is essentially this. It's like Beck and I. Yeah. Doing. Just riffing, just having fun.

[B]

Made a song.

[A]

Yes. The first episode. I have a huge reveal to Beck.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

A life reveal.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That, Rochelle, you said made you cry. It did. I teared up.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then at the end of the episode, we made a song, which is a pretty good song. Yeah. Song of the Summer. And then today, for the premiere of it, we went on the Discord. And we watched the episode down with fellow Rockos.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And we riffed and we shared photos, and it was a great time, and it felt very special and like. Like, I. I just want people to know that that outlet is there and that, like, I bet we'll continue to do stuff like that.

[B]

Oh, yeah. I think it's just the beginning. We'll continue to do more and more fun stuff, and it's great. It's great to have a place where people, you know, love what we make. We can just make stuff for them and where people. Yeah. Appreciate it, but.

[A]

Yes. Johnny Pemberton is here today.

[B]

Johnny Pemberton is here today.

[A]

No bios.

[B]

It's okay. It's okay for Shell.

[A]

I feel like I'm, like, bullying you, and I really don't want. I think I'm just fucking up a lot.

[B]

No, no, no, you're not. You're not.

[A]

You. You make our lives so much better.

[B]

You do. I just for. So everybody knows, we were during. During.

[A]

I want to give her the seal.

[B]

Seal of approval. Just during this Discord thing. I had realized right before that I left my computer on a flight yesterday because it was a long day and I wasn't thinking straight, and I left my computer on a flight and. And Rochelle went online and filed a missing item thingy for me. I gave her my flight info and stuff, and she did that for me so that I could focus on the Discord in this episode. Yeah. And she also does so much. You do so much.

[A]

Set up with the Discord. So we knew what we were doing. She pressed play on the episode. Yeah.

[B]

She's cutting it together. She's working on four or five shows.

[A]

Insightful, funny, chill.

[B]

Just like a total vibe. So, yeah, you.

[A]

So we stan you.

[B]

We salute you, Michelle. But now it's time to talk about our guest. As we've said, Johnny Pemberton, an old friend of ours. So funny. I've always been incredibly charmed by the man. He's. He's just got, like a. An appealing vibe. His raspy voice.

[A]

Movie out called Mermaid, I believe.

[B]

Yes. Yes, he does. Sure.

[A]

We'll talk about that a little bit.

[B]

He's in Fallout season two.

[A]

Do you think he's ever listened to our. Or seen our podcast?

[B]

I'm gonna say no, but that's okay.

[A]

Let's find out.

[B]

Can't wait to talk to him and catch up with him. It's Johnny Pemberton.

[A]

Thank you guys so much again for being. For just being here. You are amazing. You're amazing.

[B]

If you're still listening, we need your help.

[A]

We're lost.

[B]

We're lost and confused. We don't know what our podcast should be about. This is Johnny Pemberton.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Let's have fun with him.

[A]

This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. I'm Ronny Ron, and you're listening to Beck 102. That's right.

[B]

What's going on? Squarespace is the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and do well online. Oh, yeah. You know, I love to do well

[A]

online and on C2. He's Amber Dexterous, folks.

[B]

What are you talking about? I don't know. I don't know what you're talking about.

[A]

I'm. I'm paid to talk on this microphone. To play the hits.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

And to do. And to.

[B]

And to do that.

[A]

And do ads and to do a comical read of the weather.

[B]

Okay, well, maybe I'm not. What I want to talk about is Squarespace. Okay, Sorry I went off.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

No, I'm trying to talk about Squarespace.

[A]

What is this? What is this? It's a little man. He's got something to say, and he came out of my ear. Maybe you're just starting out or maybe you want to scale your business. Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings with a professional website, grow your brand, and get paid all in one place.

[B]

I love that little finger of yours. Always, always fingering around. But you know when you know what something else you can do with your. Your finger, you.

[A]

I can think of a few things.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not that. No, you can use.

[A]

It involves.

[B]

Involves putting it into a square space,

[A]

AI wiggling around and seeing if you can get. And seeing if you can.

[B]

See if you can make a website out of it. Yeah, no, but you just use your little fingies and you just kind of tap, tap, tap on your keyboard and your little mouse and you can easily just like, just make a website and grow your brand. What's that? Yeah, we did. Finn Wolfhard is one of the most fun guys. He was just like, it's just nice when a celebrity is a real person. But what we're talking about is how great Squarespace is.

[A]

He's got the templates, it's got temp, it's got the templates.

[B]

It has the templates, it's got the templates, it's got the fonts, it's got the easy accessible.

[A]

Put in some drops in there, some photos.

[B]

You can kind of make it whatever you want. It's got the SEO tools I love.

[A]

And can I tell you what I love about the SEO tools?

[B]

Yeah, come on, tell me, bro. Lay it on me to me.

[A]

They're helpful in getting discovered fast.

[B]

Let's go.

[A]

Because of the integrated Squarespace SEO tools you're talking, every single website is getting optimized to be indexed with meta descriptions, an auto generated sitemap, and even more.

[B]

That's not all I know.

[A]

So you show up more often on search engines and bring in more of your ideal customers. Check out squarespace.com beg and Kyle for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code beckandkyle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

[B]

And just have fun, okay? We're not having enough fun in this world. There's too much going on, and we get too preoccupied with being efficient, and it's just like, ah, there's a better way to cook.

[A]

John Malkovich, come out there for a moment. Can you do a John Malkovich?

[B]

A John Malkovich?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Check out Squarespace, Beck and Kyle for a free trial. And when you. And when you're you.

[A]

You did it.

[B]

And when you're ready to launch. I can't now. I can't do it.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Just remember there is a slash after that. Squarespace.com squarespace.com okay. Hey, dude.

[B]

Whoa. Wake up. Sorry, I was taking a little nap. No big deal.

[A]

Podcast is brought to you by Aura Frames. Yes, this Mother's Day frame. What makes mom special with Aura Frames. I like this. Okay, we got a little script here. Yeah. Do you want to. Do you want to go off book or do you want to read it?

[B]

Speak our. I would like to just speak our mind.

[A]

I love my wife. Oh, my gosh.

[B]

I love my wife, too.

[A]

I love stabbing photos of her. Oh, yeah. On my phone or digital camera.

[B]

Oh, I do, too. I love taking photos of your wife. On my phone or digital camera. I love to capture memories. What do you mean?

[A]

What do you mean? You're taking pictures of my wife?

[B]

Taking pictures of your wife? But what if you could frame those memories and I could, like, put those. Take those photos of your wife and frame them with an aura frame and, like, put them up around my house.

[A]

Well, it'll be so much nicer, but I don't know. I feel like you're taking a picture of my wife.

[B]

Yeah, but I want to. And with Aura Frames, I get free unlimited storage, so I can take as many photos of your wife as I want. And I'm never Gonna run that does not out of space. And my wife likes the photos of your wife as well. And you can preload photos before the frame ships so that as soon as the frame comes, I'll have photos of Kyle's wife in the aura frame and me and my wife can look at them. Just photos without Kyle. Name number one by wirecutter.

[A]

You can save on the gifts moms love by visiting aura frames.com for a limited time.

[B]

Listeners can get 25 off their best selling carver mat. Frame with code our podcast. That's a U R A frames.com promo code our podcast support the show by mentioning us at checkout. Make sure you mention our name. Terms and conditions apply or frames.com promo code our podcast. I'm sure she's fine with it.

[A]

I'll find I'll be having that conversation tonight. I'm sure. Johnny Pemberton, everybody.

[B]

Johnny Pemberton, everybody.

[C]

Hi, everybody. It's Johnny Pemberton.

[B]

It's Johnny Pemberton.

[C]

We're talking position. Is this good?

[B]

That is a great position.

[C]

Is this okay?

[B]

No, I think that's right. I'm always messing with it.

[A]

If you want to, you can use that pillow.

[C]

I'm going to use it.

[B]

Sometimes it's nice to put a pillow. Yeah.

[C]

In your back, you know, because we want to slouch.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, absolutely.

[B]

And then sometimes you don't realize how much you're slouching.

[A]

Okay. He's got. So you've got a major. You got something to talk about here.

[B]

And your pants. I like that your pants are the color of the couch.

[C]

Oh, no.

[B]

You didn't know that. And that's cool, though. That's good. It looks good. It looks good.

[A]

Why would you say it like that? No, you made him feel uncomfortable.

[B]

No, I.

[A]

Did I make you feel obsessed with this?

[C]

I mean, it's too late now, so.

[B]

Yeah, it's okay.

[A]

What is okay? So you're going on a road show. Is that what you call it?

[C]

I guess so. Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

An old school road show with your

[A]

movie Mermaid, which is great. I've got 45 minutes left, to be totally honest.

[B]

Yes. I started it yesterday as well. It's so good. You're so.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Yes.

[C]

You didn't finish it in one swoop, huh?

[B]

I'm sorry. I was traveling yesterday.

[C]

You guys have kids?

[B]

I was traveling with my child two flights from Naples yesterday.

[C]

That is like the hardest thing in the world to do, isn't it? Travel with a kid?

[B]

Yes, but our. My son is at an age where we just put an iPad on for him.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

And we just. We're. We just like when we're traveling, goggles on them. Yeah. Strap his hands down, pads around his head and just got a parachute pack.

[C]

Puffy jacket.

[B]

Exactly.

[C]

Air filled jacket. So he can't just put some.

[B]

Just get some like smoothies, like a tube going.

[C]

Light up. Sword.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Foam sword lights up.

[B]

Yeah. It's traveling with the kid. It's just definitely. We got it down to a mask

[C]

on the back of his head. So jaguars don't attack from the back.

[B]

Yes. Coyotes do sometimes too. That way.

[C]

Yes. He has the spike jacket like Chihuahuas have.

[B]

Yeah. We just put pee all over him. So like. Yeah. Because the animals don't go just like regular. I think it's wolf pee.

[C]

Oh, I thought.

[B]

Yes. Have you heard about wolf pee to get coyotes away?

[C]

Well, I just think predator urine in general. I just use predator urine.

[B]

Yeah, of course. Yeah, we all do.

[A]

Okay. Like, I've got about a million questions, but I'm not gonna ask them because. Did you just say you give your son an iPad?

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. When we travel.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Sir police.

[A]

I did not have sex with that woman.

[C]

Did you have sex? I didn't have sex with that woman.

[A]

That's a good film.

[C]

Oh, I love barbecue wings. And did I say the P word?

[B]

I think that is. I think he has said that.

[C]

Nice guy. Nice.

[B]

He's definitely said that. Not on record.

[A]

I was gonna say. So the. Yeah, the movie's great. Here's. Have you been having to do. Have you. Have you been doing interviews about it or doing press?

[C]

A little bit. I've done a bunch of stuff about it, but somehow it's like we don't talk about it.

[A]

Right.

[C]

You know those things where it's like, you're doing a friend's podcast.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

You're there to promote a thing, but you end up just talking about everything. But I think we.

[A]

I think so. I think we sort of. Sometimes we're good about talking about the

[C]

new thing you just broke.

[B]

We just went right into it.

[A]

Yeah, I was gonna. Yeah, I was gonna. And like, here's my pitch of it and you could tell me if this is bad.

[C]

Okay, I'm ready. I'm ready.

[A]

I'm saying it's sort of like Shape of Water meets Beach Bum.

[C]

I like that. I think we will also maybe say it's like Splash meets Lars and the Real Girl.

[A]

Great.

[B]

Yeah. That's a great, great combo.

[A]

When did you. I am curious. It's funny. It's horrifying. It's sweet.

[C]

It's a weird movie. It's not like. It's not a horror movie.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Which is, you know, good and bad. Because horror people are like, oh, yeah, that's. No, that's not horror.

[A]

Right.

[B]

It's like they want more. They like. It's not enough. Like, one gore. I want, like, suspense. I want to be, like, having that feeling, I guess.

[C]

Because horror movies are very specific.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

It's like a thing where if you say your movie's a horror movie and it's not, people are like, no. Like, it doesn't matter if it's good or bad. It's just. You said something that wasn't. That it isn't.

[B]

Right.

[C]

You know what I mean?

[A]

But it has horror components.

[C]

It does. It's got horror elements to it, but it's not like a dyed in the wool horror movie.

[A]

I also thought of the immediate movie I thought of was et.

[C]

Really? Yeah, I guess. God, man, you're doing a better job than I can possibly do with this.

[B]

Yeah. You find a little creature and bring it in and kind of form a relationship with it.

[C]

Wow, that's funny. Yeah, it is kind of an et Like a Florida et.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Druggie guy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Did you. Okay, so.

[B]

And you are. You're fantastic.

[C]

Thank you.

[B]

Yeah, it is. Like, I'm curious. Well, you were about to.

[A]

I mean, we got so many questions. It's like. We got. We're here with Johnny Pemberton. This is incredible. Like, I love movies. I remember you from back in the day.

[C]

We all know each other for maybe 20 years now.

[B]

I know. Yeah. Since the beginning.

[C]

Isn't that weird, though, that there's so many people that we know who are like. I have friends who are. They're so famous. It's really absurd.

[B]

Yeah, sure.

[C]

And I think, like, how I know them is. It's so casual.

[B]

Yeah. Just from, like, doing. Doing shows at bars throughout our 20s and, like, being around and hanging out. Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

We probably met. I would. I would guess 2007, 2008.

[C]

I think so. Yeah. Because I moved here 2005. I think the new year or maybe 2006. I always forget.

[B]

Where'd you move from?

[C]

From Minnesota.

[B]

Okay, so which is where you grew up.

[C]

Yeah. But I went to college in Florida before that, and then I moved back home because I didn't have a job.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So I got a job here and then moved here.

[B]

What was the job here?

[C]

I worked for Fox.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Fox.com. doing a job that doesn't exist. Anymore because it was pre 2008 and they had jobs. You know, the 2008 financial crisis, when things changed a lot, the bubble burst. The job was one of those jobs where it's like, they're paying me to.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Like, they don't even know I'm here.

[C]

I just show up.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I had, like, two and a half hour lunches sometimes.

[B]

That's great.

[C]

And we'd come back and nobody knew you could still be at lunch.

[B]

I think Nick Rutherford definitely had some temp jobs like that where he was just, like, using the printer to print out flyers and stuff.

[C]

This was like that. But it wasn't a temp job.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. And I. I feel like we probably met via Rutherford because you were doing stand up. Nick was doing stand up. He also had that regular show at the Ramada Inn.

[C]

The Ramada?

[B]

Oh, yeah, Ramada.

[C]

That was, I think, the second place I ever did any live comedy.

[B]

Really?

[C]

I was so bold back then. I asked Fatum if I could do a second set as a character. He was like, sure, go do it.

[B]

Really?

[C]

Yeah. So can I go up again on the same show in a different, like, different shirt?

[B]

Oh, man, you do.

[A]

And Josh Fatum, another amazing comedian who, like. Yeah, I feel like we're throwing back to a very distinct era where, like, all of us were sort of running around the real. But you still. You do stuff with Josh occasionally, right?

[C]

Yeah, we've toured a bunch of times together.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

He's so funny.

[C]

He's like one of the funniest people alive, I feel like.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Okay. Questions I have. Okay, well, we were talking. You were talking about taking the movie on the road. Have you been doing a lot of Q&As? Q&As are funny.

[C]

They are. We did one recently, like, a screening we had last week or this week, actually. It was pretty fun. It was also kind of awkward because there's so many, like. I don't know, it's like an industry crowd sort of thing. But we're doing one. The movie premieres April 8th. That's like the sneak previews in Drafthouse. Like, it's like, maybe 11 drafthouse cinemas across the country.

[B]

Great.

[C]

We're doing a Q A.

[A]

How bitty are you in The Q&As?

[C]

How giddy bitty.

[B]

Yeah. I can't believe.

[C]

Here comes the first question for me. Oh, no, not for me.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Oh, it's from a tall person.

[C]

Can I just pop in here? Like, yes, we did have a lot of fun on set. Can I just say that. Yeah.

[B]

Can you tell us a crazy prank you did on set? Oh, my God.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

A water bottle. It was not my water bottle. I drank from it and then later I found out it was not mine. And Kevin Nealon, who's in the film.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

He was like, did you drink my water bottle? And I said, did I?

[B]

That's fucking hilarious. That's fucking awesome shit. That's some funny shit. That's funny. Funny shit.

[C]

It's funny, right?

[B]

Funny shit, Kyle. Right?

[A]

Yeah, man.

[C]

It's funny, right?

[B]

Okay. Yeah. You like that, right? Yeah, it's funny shit.

[A]

Kevin Nealon is very funny in the movie.

[C]

He's very funny.

[B]

He is very funny of the movie.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I love his reaction when he sees the mermaid for the first time.

[C]

That's. That's a good. A good.

[B]

It's a nuanced reaction, I thought. Anyway, how did.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Q and A, though? I get kind of bitty because I got. You got it.

[A]

You do get bitty.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Because otherwise I don't want to seem like some. Cuz it's that thing, you know, if you're a comedic actor.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's tough not to be bitty in that situation.

[C]

Cuz I don't want to be like, oh, I'm Barry Keegan here. Being like. Yeah, that was, you know. You know, like.

[A]

But that also means you can't, like, if you're being bitty sometimes, then you also have to sort of disregard the form a little bit.

[C]

Like, you gotta.

[A]

I mean.

[C]

Yeah. Because you know how to. You know how to. You know how to surf, bro.

[B]

Yeah. You just got to make it your own. You answer the question you want to answer. Am I right?

[C]

I've heard that before.

[B]

That's what they say.

[C]

Yeah. They ask you, why did you guys do that terrorist attack? And you say, I've always liked brunch.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But then you also twisted around. There's the like. Kind of like, okay, I'm gonna come up with something fun here. But then there's also like saying the exact. Sometimes you'll say the exact same thing you've said so many times before. Like, well, I met Brian. We actually went to the same high school. We didn't know each other then because he was two years older, but we met up again. Or he. We just started emailing each other and he had this idea for, you know, what if. You know, what if there was this radioactive orange. And I was like, that idea just stuck with me. And that's how Blade man came to be.

[B]

That's Q&A 101 right there.

[C]

Have you seen that Lady Gaga supercut, when she was doing press for Star is Born. Star is Born. She's just talking about Bradley Cooper. She's like, if there's a room of 99 people and there's one person in there who believes in you, it's Bradley. Yeah, but that's just the thing where you have to do that. Because she's been asked that question, of course, a thousand times in 10 days. So she's got to just like. Because that's. If you answer a question truthfully. Takes so much brain power. Because you have to think like, oh, how do you have to think about it?

[B]

And it's also often underwhelming. It's like, well, it's just like very

[A]

simple, you know, You've also been editing. I feel like, you know what I mean, the first time you're asked the question, you get a version of it and then like, it only gets better and more concise to the point where I might as well just use this thing that I can easily just go to grab.

[C]

Yeah, save some. Save some. Ram.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

What's computer, you know?

[B]

Yeah, computer.

[A]

Oh, cuz I thought, oh, I was like, save some. Because I didn't know, you know, if like it was a dietary thing or.

[C]

Oh, yeah, that's. That's dietary. It can be.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Like mental health stuff. You can like, you can go on a diet for your mental health and your mental over. What's the other one? Ram.

[C]

Rom. Ramen ram.

[B]

No, not Rom. No, I don't have enough bandwidth.

[C]

Flip flop. Bandwidth.

[B]

Bandwidth.

[C]

That's a popular one to say is I'll reply in an email saying, I'm sorry, I don't have the bandwidth for this right now. Can I pass you off to Cheryl Jason Jones in Cheryl Jason Jones in Ben Stevenson's office who will circle back on this item because that is great.

[B]

And I should say that more often.

[A]

Wait, all right, sorry. You one of the characters or are you back? That's great. I should actually do that.

[B]

I should actually do that more often.

[C]

Yeah. Or flagging. You guys ever do flagging?

[A]

Yeah, flag that.

[B]

Oh, yeah, flagging.

[C]

It's a great way to say, hey, just so you know, dumbass, you didn't read this shit. Oh yeah, flagging. It's the 21st, not the 22nd.

[B]

Yeah, I'm gonna start using flagging. Flagging with more cool for our listeners. Just so you guys know.

[C]

It's a great, great touchstone.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I will ask you, unless if you have something. You could say it. But I have the most generic question.

[C]

Okay, I'm ready.

[B]

And then.

[A]

And then I think we gotta. We gotta go back to like the old days.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So, yeah, okay.

[A]

You're an executive producer on this movie.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You star in this movie.

[C]

Right.

[A]

How did you come on board? What can you say about the sort of Genesis? Yes, exactly.

[C]

There's a movie called Butt Boy. Have you guys seen that?

[B]

No.

[C]

It's a great movie.

[B]

But that sounds exciting. It catches you.

[C]

It's not a sexual movie per se, but it's a great movie. It's called Butt Boy. It's written and directed by Tyler Cornack, who did Mermaid as well. And I saw that movie because my wife, who's like a big time cinephile, like hardcore cinephile, she saw it and she liked it a lot and she's like, he's. You got to see this movie. So I watched it and I. I loved it. I just truly loved this movie. It's like, it's a indie. Indie movie. It's like, you know, probably less than $100,000 movie. Yeah, maybe less. It's just super cheap movie, but it's just great. Like all the performances are. I love it. I fell in love with it. This is probably 2021, maybe late 2020. I watched this movie and I liked it so much. I messaged Tyler. I was like, hey man, I love your movie. And he got back to me, he's like, hey, I like your comedy. And we met up and we just became friends. And he had this project he was writing and he was like, hey, would you be interested in doing this? And I was like, sure. And then time moved on and it became a real thing. Simp.

[B]

That's, you know, that's great. Like, I feel like I never, like, I will think about doing stuff like that and I don't do it.

[C]

I think I was a couple beers deep.

[B]

Okay, so that's how you wrote like your Instagram message.

[C]

Yeah, but it was really just simple. I just said, hey, I love your movie, you know, it's great.

[B]

Oh my gosh.

[A]

That is something I want to bring up with you.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

I think you were the first person I. I ever saw. Or you told me you drank a sour beer in front of me.

[C]

Really? Where was this?

[A]

Was. Would this make sense though?

[C]

Yeah, I mean, I. I used to be like hardcore beer guy.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

I feel like it was. It was either at a party or at a show. And you probably brought your own six pack or something. You definitely were like kind of self curating the experience.

[C]

It might have been something I brewed and maybe.

[A]

And I was. And I remember just thinking at the time, like, why would somebody purposefully drink something that's sour? But then I got, I, I really, I'm sorry. That's like the most basic thing. And then I got into sour beers.

[B]

And then I actually like got into sour. But that's cool.

[A]

It was, it was a nice, it was a good, it's nice to be exposed to something.

[C]

That's so funny.

[B]

So you used to brew beer?

[C]

Yeah, but not like super seriously. With my brother. He lived here for a couple years.

[A]

We would do beer.

[B]

My brother a beer brewer. Younger. But like going into this today I was like, I feel like Johnny just like makes a lot of stuff like. Do you like, do you garden?

[C]

Yeah. Hardcore.

[B]

Yeah. You're a gardener. You, you brewed beer. I know you, you like make your own shirts and sweatshirt. You have like your own merch store behind on it.

[C]

But I have, I have, I have a store right now. But it's like, it's good stuff.

[B]

You strike me as somebody who just like, like you get an idea and you make it.

[C]

I have times. I've been not great lately.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

The garden needs to be. I'm rebuilding the garden bed and it's going to be so much work, like so much physical labor. I've been putting it off.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Because I know I'm going to be incredibly sore for like three days afterwards.

[B]

Really.

[C]

So I've been putting it off. But yeah, I used to be really into gardening and like I like making stuff. I just like making things. I like to make cider. It's really easy to make too.

[B]

Really?

[C]

Yeah. You can make your own cider and it's totally organic and it tastes great.

[B]

And so you're making cider now? That's the thing that you do.

[C]

I usually do it in the winter because it's so hot right now. It's hard to brew certain types of things because the yeast wants to be like a, a lower temperature. I don't want to run the air conditioning in the house like non stop just for five gallons of cider.

[B]

Yeah. Unless it's really good.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

This is like alcoholic cider or.

[C]

Alcoholic.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, that's right. That's right.

[C]

For a long time. Yeah.

[A]

But is it always apples?

[C]

I think you can add stuff to it. I think ciders. This is a fun story actually.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

You know Johnny Appleseed?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

His whole thing, those apples he was planting, they're not for eating, they're for making cider. He was a drunk. He was a Calvinist drunk. Who was. He just loved. That's why, you know, the temperance movement back in the day, the symbol of the temperament movement.

[B]

I don't know much about it, but

[C]

the symbol of the temperance movement was a hatchet because they wanted to chop down apple trees. Because the only thing people used apples for was to make cider because it was so easy to make it. It. Oh, wow. So but then did people.

[A]

People ended up eating these apples?

[C]

I mean, I think we don't know because that's.

[B]

We don't know.

[C]

Some of the apples, some of the apples that, for cider don't taste very.

[A]

You can't eat them.

[C]

You can eat them, but it's like, you know, it's not very good. It's like a mealy, not very sweet, overly tart apple.

[A]

Right.

[C]

But there's hundreds of varieties of apples.

[B]

So I think, I mean, that's great that you, Johnny, know this story about Johnny Appleseed and you make apple cider.

[C]

I just think it's a cool story because it's like it just puts everything on its head because everything's so, so conservative and Christian apples are considered so, so wholesome, pure. But for like 100 years in America, the only thing people like 90% of apples are used for making booze. You can make apple jack. This is stuff where you take apple cider and you freeze it. It's called jacking.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

So you freeze all the water out of it so it's much more concentrated. It's like a poor man's version of like a apple whiskey.

[B]

Oh, wow.

[C]

And it's just, it's disgusting. But it gets you wasted. It gets you wasted because it's got higher alcohol proof.

[B]

Wow. Damn, dude.

[A]

I don't want to. I don't want. I don't want to put you to work by any means.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

But if you'd be down to someday do some apple jacking for us, I would love to try it.

[B]

I would try your apple jacking.

[C]

I've never done it.

[B]

So would you. Could you just take some of your apple cider and then freeze it?

[C]

I guess so. That would be the. You want to do full circle, right? Because I want to make the apple cider that I'm jacking.

[B]

You want to do a full circle jacking?

[C]

I want to do full circle jack. Get the boys involved, come over.

[B]

Yes, we'll come over. We'll get as many guys, get the

[C]

wives down to like, I Don't know. Cabo or something. They're gone.

[B]

Yeah. So they're not coming back. They're not going to walk in on us or something.

[C]

We're doing a boys jack session. Yeah, we're going to get this cider, some strong cider. We'll go buy a chest freezer at Best Buy. You know, take it back later, old school. Yeah. Buy the nicest chest freezer we can. Full two year protection plan. Bring it home, plug it in, throw

[B]

on the game and start applejacking.

[C]

Start jack. Well, we have to let the cooler freeze down, cool down freezer.

[A]

This guy can't wait to apple Jack.

[B]

I mean, I was excited about it. Sounds like a really fun time.

[C]

And then we just sit there and we just, you know, wait for that cider to jack.

[A]

How long does it take to apple jack?

[C]

They were jacked. I've never done it.

[B]

Yeah, we got. This is what we all got to figure out together.

[C]

It's gotta take some time.

[A]

Like a day, two days, two hours.

[C]

I bet it takes it at least overnight.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Unless you've got.

[A]

We're just gonna be hanging, hanging around, having fun while we wait for the apples to jack.

[C]

Maybe just know a guy who like is good with like, you know, wires and mechanics. Maybe he can make us like he could over jack a freezer so we could get like a thing.

[A]

Michael, my AV guy.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Yeah, he's probably perfect for that.

[C]

Do you want to put him on blast real quick on. Maybe send out a Twitter message to say, hey Mike, did this camera work?

[B]

Yo, that one works.

[C]

Hey Mike, let's start it one more time. Okay, yeah. Yo, what's up, Mike? It's your boy Johnny Pemberton with your boy Kyle and Beck. Hey man, could you hook us up with like an overclocked fan, rotor speed, motor on like a cooling device, chiller freezer type deal? It's all Greek to me, bro. All right, we'll see you there.

[B]

It sounds like you know what you're talking about.

[C]

I mean, I've heard that before.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, we've heard that before.

[C]

Put me in a truck stop and next thing you know I'm driving a truck. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Is that true?

[C]

Exactly, exactly.

[B]

No, no, we're here talking about. But let's go back to back in the day.

[A]

Oh, wait, but I have one. I have a. Wait, sorry. One more before back.

[C]

Okay, drop in.

[A]

Beck's mad.

[B]

No, I'm not mad at all. I'm happy we're here shooting this shit. Talk about applejacking. With our old boy Johnny.

[C]

We're just shooting shots.

[B]

We're shooting shots.

[A]

Okay. I fucked up.

[B]

Yes, you did.

[C]

I can take off. I can, like, lay down.

[B]

So your wife.

[A]

Your wife is a cinephile.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And. But I. I heard in. I listened to a podcast you're on a while ago, and I didn't know that. I realized this in just our interactions, but you're you at one point or maybe still have a deep record collection. What?

[C]

I don't know. It's like. It could go a lot of places, but. Yeah. Yeah, I got. I got a pretty deep collection.

[A]

Did you. Wait, the thing you thought I was gonna say, did you think it was gonna be like, oh, no, I have to talk about this?

[C]

No, I thought it was gonna be like a joke.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Oh, shit. Sorry.

[C]

Like a really dry tee up.

[A]

Yeah, that probably wouldn't. Smarter.

[C]

Yeah, I got a pretty heavy collection.

[A]

The worst question ever is, like, what type of music do you listen to? But do you. Is there. Is there a genre?

[C]

Mostly reggae.

[A]

Oh, cool.

[C]

A lot of R&B. Like, 60s, 70s R&B and soul and jazz and A. Psych. But mostly, mostly like reggae. I guess that's like, what I've been collecting for a lot for like, last 15 years.

[B]

Who are you into? That, like, is not. I mean, I don't know reggae that

[C]

well, but, like, my favorite guy's probably Toyon and maybe Johnny Osborne also. John Wayne is great. Dillinger, J. A. Thomas, and maybe what's his name, Little John. A lot of johns Was that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And have you always been deep into reggae or was that. Was there an age where, like, I listened to legend and then that was sort of the.

[C]

No, actually, I got into it when I was living in Tallahassee after I was done with college. I worked at a record store and these box sets came out from Trojan Records, these three CD box sets. And I just found out about that. And there was a music type of music called Rocksteady. It came out maybe three or four years before reggae was even a word, like maybe 1966 or so. And this music sounds very different than what you would think reggae to be, but it still has a. It still essentially has the reggae sound. Like the. Like the signature upstruck, whatever. Yeah, but it's just like I fell in love with it so hardcore that it was all I cared about for a long time. And I was also really into just. Just like DJing too. I would DJ. I used to have a weekly DJ gig at this bar downtown. It's now closed Bar 107. Remember that place?

[B]

Oh, yeah, absolutely.

[C]

Class DJ there's. And I just got super into collecting it. I mean, I just shot a special that won't be out. I'm sure when it's going to be out. But it's all about getting super into reggae as a defense mechanism, essentially. Like, you know, a distraction technique.

[A]

And you. Are you still actively buying records?

[C]

I pulled back a lot like a couple years ago.

[B]

I pulled back now as a distraction technique.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

What do you mean by that exactly?

[C]

Like a thing to get into that is like consumes your. Consumes your thoughts.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Because the whole. The show I wrote, it's all about. Because I have a bowel disease. I have ulcerative colitis.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

And I've had it for about, I guess, 30 something years now. But I had my colon removed about 25 years ago.

[B]

Right. I think I knew. I knew this. Yeah.

[C]

Had that removed because of the colitis. Because the idea is every year you have ulcerative colitis, it's not being actively treated by medicine, Your chances of getting colon cancer triple. So the idea is that you want to take out the colon because they can take it out. And the whole show is about having that disease. It's a funny. It's a comedy show. I'm talking about all these stories about it and how I got really into reggae at one point and how it was this thing for me to basically soaked up all of my energy in terms of I didn't have to think about how I felt.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. And is there is like. Is reggae music calming to you? Like, is it just. Does it take you to a different place?

[C]

Like, I think it just takes. For me, it takes me away because it's so different than anything. You know, it's like this thing where these. These guys are singing in English, but it also feels. It feels so exotic that it's not like. You know what I mean? I'm trying to. It's hard to describe, but it's basically like this thing where it's so interesting and so familiar at the same time because you have everything.

[A]

It's like a parallel universe. Yeah.

[C]

Parallel universe. And it's just so incredibly interesting because all these reggae musicians, they had nothing. And the country's newly independent and it's all almost like 99.9% all black owned and run. So it's this thing where it's like this movement from nothing that they created something that was totally unique and also has a lot of basis in American music. So it's this weird sort of like. Almost like a parody that they created with. The story goes that for a long time in Jamaica, there were these sound clashes and stuff where they were playing American 45s at these huge dances. And what happened was people started to get access to. They knew what songs they were playing because they were secret. And so, God, it's so hard to explain this because it's such a long story, but basically, the Jamaicans created their own music because the American music started moving from RB to rock. They didn't like rock and roll music, so they started making their own music. And that's basically how reggae was invented, was like. They basically invented their own style of music.

[B]

It was kind of based off American.

[C]

Based loosely off of some sort of, like, late 50s American R B, I will say fascinating.

[A]

I mean, I can't say that I go, like, really deep into, like, reggae and knowing all the artists or anything like that, but I really. This is so basic and. But I love reggae covers. Like, and I feel like there's so many, you know, like, any artist, there's so much better. Any.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Popular artists of the last, like, century or, I guess, whatever. 50 years. Like, there is a reggae cover of a song they did.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's always rad.

[C]

There's a guy, Alton Ellis, who has a record from yes. Oh, yeah. You know that one? He covers, like, this BG song and covers, like, a song. Yeah, they're so much better than all the originals because it feels, like, heavier. Feels like more like. Like. Oh, wow, you're really singing about that. Not just, like, singing about it to. To say something.

[B]

Right, right. What was that show that you hosted about? Oh, yeah, like, cars, vehicles.

[C]

Oh, my God. Mega Drive.

[B]

Mega Drive.

[C]

Dude, that's wild.

[B]

Rob Anderson.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

What up, Rob?

[C]

What up, Rob?

[B]

We worked with Rob Anderson.

[C]

That's right.

[B]

And he produced that show for mtv. You were the host of it. It was my, like, first time getting a joke on a show. I mean, like, you know what it was. There were many times after that it was pro. It was something about logger trucks. It was something about dropping a log. Like, that was the biggest log I've ever dropped. And I remember that you said something to that degree, which is, like, if I didn't say it, somebody else easily would have because it's kind of an obvious joke. But I do remember pitching that.

[A]

I'm pretty sure. Good Neighbor. As represented by.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Beck. Myself and Nick split.

[B]

Like, we split a writing credit or.

[A]

Yeah. A chat.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And that's not much.

[B]

It's not much.

[A]

It was still cool, but like.

[B]

Yeah, but it was that phase where we were all living together.

[A]

Three.

[B]

We were just. Whatever.

[A]

It's.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Just making enough to not to be able to quit my waiting job.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[B]

And we were just like, living together, making videos.

[A]

You must have been psyched. Getting the hosting gig.

[C]

It was the first thing I ever did. Yeah, it was.

[B]

I mean, like, going back to that time. It's like. I remember you getting that.

[C]

Yeah. I guess it was a thing where

[B]

you look back on it now and it's like, yeah, that show that I did. But I'm sure it was super exciting to be a part of it.

[C]

It was also. I didn't really have any frame of reference at all.

[B]

Yeah, Yeah.

[C]

I did know that one time I told a comic who's like, maybe three or four years older than me, and you could see his face just be like, absolutely. No, like, pissed.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So pissed. He didn't believe me. He was like, what? What?

[B]

You're like, yeah. You're like.

[C]

I remember it so clearly. What? What?

[A]

You know who the person is, obviously, but you don't say their name.

[C]

No, I won't say it.

[A]

Not Rodney.

[C]

Rodney Dangerfield. Not Rodney. No.

[B]

That would have been cool if you

[C]

got that he's more than three or four years older than him.

[B]

Yeah. I feel like he wouldn't have been too jealous of it, but maybe he would have been.

[A]

He's always got the respect issue.

[C]

He does. I feel. You know, I get that now. I get that respect thing.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Because when you do the industry for long enough, ups and downs, you feel

[B]

like, ugh, you get the newcomers coming in. They don't know they're not showing you respect and they don't know what you've been through and all the stuff you've done.

[C]

It's that thing that Brody said years ago. Why me? No. Have TV shows.

[B]

Brody really should.

[A]

It is.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

There's something. I don't know how to articulate this, and maybe it's just that, like. And I don't know if you're. If you've. If we all are dealing with age and, like, kind of, oh, we are. We're over 40 and, like, we've become grownups.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

I don't know how. I don't know how to frame this. But what I'm getting at is that, like, I think about that time in the mid to late aughts, and it does feel like a special period of time. And maybe everybody would Feel that way about, like, their 20s or something like that. But even, like, the comedy scene and, like, I think comedy was in a good place, and there were shows being made, and it was very exciting. That era of coming up and making

[C]

stuff, it was the best. And it definitely. There is that hindsight effect to where you look back and you think, like, oh, kids now. It was different. We had it different. It was more fun.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

But there also. There has been a lot of changes in the world where we didn't have Smart. If we did have smartphones, they weren't that smart.

[A]

Right.

[C]

They didn't have all this stuff. We didn't have. Like, I wasn't on Instagram for a long time. I just was like, I don't want to do that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Now I think about, like, this is not even a. There's nothing fun about it at all. It's like having a car.

[B]

It's like we were talking about before you got here. It's just like a full addiction. Like, I'll just, like, be on and be like, what am I doing? Why am I doing this?

[A]

But, yeah.

[C]

So insidious.

[A]

It's.

[C]

You can't. It's beyond description.

[A]

But also, like, I don't know if you're getting at this with, like, the car of it all. It's, like, unnecessary evil to, like, as a comedian.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I mean, that's become so much of.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Of promotion. And, like, even though now it feels like it's so difficult to promote your stuff because you're going against this algorithm and this thing that, like, is. You can't really dictate or they want

[C]

you to pay too.

[A]

Right.

[C]

Because they know those companies, they're not like, oh, you praying to promote something? We know you got money.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Boost it.

[C]

You want people to see it.

[B]

Yeah, you may.

[C]

How about you help.

[B]

You want to reach all your followers.

[C]

Okay, so look, here's the deal. You can pay the bank, but old Tony over here, you know, nobody knocks off old Tony.

[B]

That's right.

[A]

And I.

[C]

Mark Zuckerberg.

[B]

Okay. The Zuck.

[C]

Zuck.

[B]

Dude, you. You suck. Mark Zuckerberg.

[C]

I just miss being Meats. Smoking Meats. Was he video of him, like, we're smoking meats. We're smoking meats.

[B]

I haven't seen the Smoking Meats video. This is pre, mma.

[C]

This is definitely pre. This is a long time ago. This is like, God, it's at least 10 years old.

[B]

Wow. We gotta go check out Smoking the Meats.

[A]

Maybe we can show that. Right. Right here.

[C]

It's funny. Man, it's super funny.

[B]

Yeah, let's put in.

[C]

Hilarious.

[B]

Hey, Mark, what are you doing over there? Smoking a brisket and some ribs. Okay. Okay.

[A]

And after you do that, what are you gonna. What are you doing? What are you doing smoking these meats here?

[C]

You wanna have like a sour beer, maybe some cider, Mark? That'd be kind of fun, right?

[A]

Smoked salmon. You'll love it.

[B]

Okay. You can't stop talking about smoking the meat.

[A]

Sweet baby rays.

[C]

Sweet baby rays.

[A]

They taste doubly better when you hunt a piano.

[C]

Is that good? Okay, bruh.

[A]

And what was it like? Cause before it was Facebook, was it Face Smash ribs and sausage?

[C]

Yeah, it was like Smash. Smash boy.

[B]

Yeah, it was smash.

[C]

No, it was. It was Face Guy. It was called Face Guy.

[B]

Face Guy. Face.

[C]

No, no, no.

[B]

It was called Face Rate.

[C]

I think I wrote it down somewhere.

[A]

You have it on you?

[C]

Yeah, I have it written down somewhere. My wallet. I keep it on my wallet. I write it down just because I'm like. I always forget that, you know, it

[A]

comes up in conversation.

[C]

Yeah. Face Boy.

[B]

Face Boy.

[A]

I think I had a faceboy growing up because there was the regular Face entertainment system, but then the Face Boy was sort of a portable.

[C]

It's called Face Friend.

[A]

That.

[B]

That's gonna. That's gonna work well. We're gonna. We're gonna have the baby. We're gonna pop up the Zuckerberg talking about his smoking.

[C]

Smoking meat.

[B]

This is. This is totally out of nowhere. But do you enjoy doing fallout?

[C]

Yeah, I like it a lot. I really do. It's. It's fun. Everyone asked me about the makeup.

[B]

I was. Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Which. The makeup. It's nice to have it put on. I find it very relaxing. I like the guys who put it on a lot. They're wonderful people. Obviously, they're true artists.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. How much time?

[C]

About three hours.

[B]

Three hours?

[C]

Yeah. Well, the makeup itself is about two and a half, but they have to do the hair too. There's a hairpiece. So they have to. They glue my hair down. All my hair gets glued down. They put a bald cap over that. And then they. I think then they put the. The forehead piece on the cheek pieces. They do all the makeup for that. Then they put the hairpiece on, and then they put my eyebrows on. And then I have to get my hair done by the hair person. And that all from beginning to end is a pretty much about three hours. Yeah.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

I get a 10 minute break.

[A]

Do you have a straw?

[C]

I don't have to.

[B]

You don't Need a straw.

[C]

It never gets covered because this part of my face is always uncovered. Thank God for season two was. You know, it was like this. So.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I don't ever have to like, breathe out of. Never. Never.

[A]

But if you wanted a straw, you can't get a straw, like, for it

[B]

to, like to have a drink or something.

[C]

I could. I don't like straws that much.

[B]

Yeah, I don't either. It's bad for the environment. Kyle, they got the paper one.

[C]

He doesn't know I know.

[B]

Eat.

[A]

You've been on my ass for years.

[B]

I thought you liked it. I'll get off your ass. I thought you liked it when I ride you.

[C]

Okay, guys. No.

[A]

Oh, he's going to sleep.

[B]

He's going to sleep now. Wait. Sorry. The three hours, is that part of your workday or. No. Is that like pre.

[C]

I mean, it counts. It counts as part of. Yeah. When I show up, if I Show up at 4:30, I'm on the clock.

[B]

You're on the clock. I just don't even. I don't even know how that crap works.

[C]

Yeah, it's. It's. It sucks. I don't like getting up early. I really don't. Like, sometimes I get up that early and I feel like I'm gonna die.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

I feel like absolute hell throughout the whole driving in the dark. And I think, oh, yeah, it's bad.

[A]

I remember, like, I have such a distinct memory getting a commercial job in when we were probably 27, 28 and like, having to go to like, leave Silver Lake to go to Chatsworth at like, you know, 4:00am or something like that. And I remember driving the car and being like, I'm going to cry right now. Like, there's something about that. You're so emotionally vulnerable. And like, I think that part of it is like. I don't know. I think set is going to the set to shoot something. I find it can be fun and nice, but there's always like an element of like, nerves and like, it never. I. I don't know that I've ever experienced, like, full comfort. Like, I'm going to just my place of like. There's usually going to be something that sort of like, messes with my confidence in some way or another.

[B]

Yeah. Yes, absolutely. It's kind of like flying. It's kind of like getting on a plane. Right. You know what I mean? It's like there's a general sense of anxiety, even though there doesn't need to be. Like, you're on time and everything, but, like, People are rushing through tsa or people are, like, trying to get in on the line. I don't know. There's just a feeling of, like, it's a normal thing, but there's like a big. There's a lot of people. Yeah. Moving around that first day on that, though.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

He's.

[A]

He's good.

[B]

You don't get nervous?

[C]

I get. I get irritable.

[B]

You get irritable?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I have to actively be like, tone it down. Tone it down.

[B]

You gotta.

[C]

You gotta. You gotta tone it down.

[A]

Because I catch myself doing that sometimes when, like. Yeah. It's like, I was with. This was an experience with Beck recently where, like.

[C]

I know what you mean.

[A]

You know exactly what you mean.

[C]

Yeah, I know. Go ahead.

[B]

You know what I mean.

[A]

All I'm saying is that I love Beck, you know?

[B]

No, no, no. But I do bad stuff.

[A]

Beck was there with me. Beck was not the perpetrator. But, like, where, like, multiple people have, like, you actually have the right information or you're doing it the right way or something like that. And, like, somebody's saying you're getting. You're hearing from multiple people. I'm sorry, I'm doing a bad job of describing this, but, like, I don't.

[C]

You mean this feeling of like, everyone

[A]

else is wrong, like, too, like, all right, we got it. Like, yeah, well, if we don't, you know, like. And all of a sudden you have that energy of being like. I can feel myself becoming. Do what I'm saying. Like. And that talk back thing, that is what I relate. When I hear, like, irritability. Irritability on set, that's like, I don't want to be a dick. And I feel like I'm pretty good about not being a dick, but sometimes it happens. You know what I mean?

[C]

You're probably not a dick. I think most people who are true dicks don't think they are.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

And I. Yeah. I've worked with some people who are like, this person's a piece of trash

[B]

and they don't care. They are. They are not going. Sorry, was I rude? No, they're just being rude.

[C]

They just have no idea because they're so in their own head.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You guys know James Pumphrey, right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, my gosh.

[B]

Wow. Dude. That.

[A]

Well, yeah.

[C]

Talking about blast from the past.

[B]

Yeah, man. What's up with James?

[C]

I just remember James, years ago, telling me about. This is so long ago, but it's always stuck with me because I think about it a lot. He did some show this Is forever ago. Did some show. There was a big actor on this show. Maybe it wasn't a show. It was something where the big actor was coming in to do a small thing, Right?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And that big actor, you're just fucking pissed. He's pissed about everything. He's being a dick to everybody because he's a big guy who made the mistake of jumping into this little thing, and he's inconvenienced by everything because it's a small time indie movie, whatever it is.

[B]

He said yes, but he's like, oh, this is so poorly written.

[C]

Yeah. Where's my. This. This trailer? You know, just like, everything is at the level he's not used to.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And he was such. I'll take us after who it was. You won't be surprised. But he was such a dick. And James was like, yeah, just such a bad look. I think about that. I'm like, yeah. Like, how much better is it to be the opposite? Be like. Like, he was so cool. He was so nice. He did our little project. He was so much fun. And he was like, right, man. This guy we got, who we all looked up to, he shows up and it was just the worst.

[B]

It was the worst experience.

[C]

Like, that's like, you don't want that out in the world.

[B]

You don't. And you have to, like, do the work to overcome that, because it is all about expectations. And then, like, you get used to something, and then it changes. And you are a cog in this machine. They need to, like. They need to have you around and keep you waiting for a long time. And, like, you know, it's. It can be a very uncomfortable humility on camera and, you know, be in this makeup or whatever, doing stunts, whatever it is. And, yeah, you do have to, like, do that extra work to be, like, to be enjoyable, to work with, and

[C]

it's so much more fun.

[B]

Responses to be.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

It's more fun to not be a dick.

[B]

Yeah. Yes.

[A]

Agreed.

[C]

Like, if you start being that way, it weighs on you and you're like, ugh. You're carrying it around and everyone's treating you differently because they don't want to. They don't want to, like, interact with you because you've got, like, this, like, nastiness all over you.

[B]

And you, like, once. Once it's there.

[C]

Are we ready? Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. It's really.

[A]

But sometimes, I gotta say, dicks get it done.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

All of a sudden, like, people are catering to them, and you're like, actually, I'm not. This is not me fighting for being a dick. I'm just saying I've been in circumstances where like, oh, man. You know, the. The person who's the loudest sort of gets the best treatment. This is not me fighting for it.

[B]

I agree, but sometimes you see people who are rude fighting for stuff, and they get what they want, and they also.

[C]

There's also that thing where it's not rudeness, it's just being like, hey, everyone, I need to say this. You have to know this. That's unacceptable. Not like, fuck you. Why'd you do that? It's like, you can't do that because that's bad.

[B]

Sure, sure, sure.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Well, before we get into our. Our. The reason we're here is you helping us with our podcast, right?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I do have to say, like, your voice. Do you get complimented on your voice a lot? You have, like, such. I mentioned this in the introduction when you weren't here, but something about your voice, it's just like that slightly raspy thing that is, like, so appealing. Like, I mean, you've always been a very appealing performer. And stand up to me, like, there's something that's just like, I got a little crush on Johnny. He's just, like, very likable.

[C]

Oh, my God. Thanks so much for saying.

[B]

But do you get complimented on that a lot? Is it brought up a lot? Sometimes it is a very unique thing, I think that sets you apart.

[C]

I also think I have a. My voice has a high register sometimes, so that's also, you know, I kind of sound like a woman on the phone a lot.

[B]

Really?

[C]

If someone's calling me who doesn't know me, they're like, hello, miss. Hello, ma'. Am. And I keep talking, and there's still that. Yes, ma'. Am. Okay, ma'. Am. Well, we'll set you up right away with that, ma'. Am.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

I'm thinking, like, used to piss me off a ton, and now who cares about it?

[B]

Well, that's maybe why I love it. Because it's a lady voice.

[C]

Yeah. Like a lady who smokes. I sound like a lady who smokes.

[B]

Yeah. That's a great voice.

[C]

I like doing voice work a lot. I love it. It's, like, my favorite. One of my favorite things to do. And I also think that for. What's your.

[A]

Can we hear your silliest voice?

[C]

Silliest voice. Oh, my God. I got so many.

[A]

You got so many.

[B]

Oh, silliest voice.

[A]

Okay, top three, then.

[C]

Okay. Silliest voice is probably the voice of my dog, which is like, what the fuck? Give me this fucking quat, bitch. What the fuck? You gimme this goddamn stupid ass food, motherfucker.

[A]

Your dog talks to you?

[C]

Well, that's the voice that's shy. Ah, bitch. Welcome home. Welcome home, bitch. Second whore.

[B]

Have you used that in anim? Like it for a habit or anything?

[C]

I have.

[B]

It's a good. It's a good accent.

[C]

Yeah. I don't think they've ever asked for that.

[B]

Yeah, you got.

[A]

Do you have any dog boy? Yeah. Do you. Do you give a voice to your dog?

[C]

Doesn't everybody?

[B]

See, I don't.

[C]

I think that's. You know about people who can't imagine stuff.

[A]

No, I have maybe heard about this.

[C]

It's a real thing. There's people who like say, think of an apple. And right now we're all like, yeah, I can see an apple in my head.

[B]

Right?

[C]

There's people who like, what are you talking about? These are normal people who can function. They can have kids. They're not mentally ill. They can hold on a job. But they do not have the ability to visualize something in their brain.

[A]

I have heard about this.

[C]

It's insane, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

How are you alive?

[B]

That is wild. They're also, I mean, like, remember something.

[A]

That's what.

[B]

Remembering stuff is like seeing it in your head.

[C]

But they think that we're crazy. They think that they're like, think of what? How do you. What do you mean, think of it? It's.

[B]

It's not there. I can't see it. I'm not gonna see something. I can't. What do you.

[C]

Right. Yeah.

[A]

That's a tough thing to like, even. I hate to say it. It's a tough thing to imagine.

[C]

It is. How are we in the same world as those people?

[A]

Because it's like. What do you mean imagine it? Just think of an apple. Well, I go get an apple. Yeah. I can eat it.

[B]

You can go get an apple. No, no.

[A]

But also. Yeah. Why would I think of an apple?

[C]

I don't. Like what happens when you read a book. Like when you're reading a book, if you can't.

[B]

You just can't imagine. Yeah.

[A]

I mean, is there a version where you're not playing? Yeah, because when we read a book, I imagine we're all like playing like a mental movie in our head.

[C]

Yeah. I'm seeing Gerard Butler and he's doing stuff.

[B]

Yeah, it's always Gerard.

[C]

It's always Gerard. I always go to if I'm. If it's a male protagonist, it's Gerard baby. I think that's just rings and all.

[B]

Absolutely divorced. Freaking shirt off.

[C]

What do you mean, you're. What do you mean, you guys? Are you telling me you can't run the bank without a guy who's gonna be doing this?

[B]

Gerard's in the room with us.

[C]

Hey, guys, listen, you guys are cool, but I'm from Australia. I can't. He's from Australia.

[A]

I was gonna.

[B]

I was hoping.

[A]

I was helping maybe

[B]

put.

[A]

Maybe we could introduce Gerard to your dog.

[B]

You don't have to do that. You don't have to do that.

[A]

And.

[C]

And I got to sign a SAG Waver for that.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the SAG Waver. That's SAG Waver territory.

[A]

Okay?

[C]

So call my SAG rep.

[B]

I love sag. Shout out to all the SAG sag.

[A]

That is another awesome set experience as well.

[B]

Hey, hey, hey. That is the energy. A lot of sort of bowing, guys. Hey.

[C]

Wow. Cool. Great set. Great set.

[A]

I'm your Sagra. My name is Brian Robers.

[C]

My name is Tony Balboni.

[A]

Anything you need, you let me know. Oh, great.

[C]

Thanks so much, guys.

[A]

What are you. I. I treating you okay? Listen, obviously I support cold water, but I. But I never know.

[B]

I don't think you're allowed to touch the water, so I never know what to say.

[C]

I think there's a. Ooh, Sparky. Queen of Stinger. Can we wrangle that?

[B]

Can we get a stinger for this guy?

[C]

Is Local 26 on this? Because this is not about that.

[B]

Yeah, no, they're treating me fine, thank you.

[C]

Cool.

[B]

Johnny Balbobi.

[C]

You need some gaff tape?

[B]

Oh, no, you can't touch that. You're not.

[C]

But there must be.

[A]

There must have been versions where actors are like, I really need to talk to you, and they're like, fully, like, things are not going well here.

[B]

And that's when the cyberpunk is like, I don't know how to help you. I'm sorry.

[A]

I actually got to go to. I got to go to the Valley.

[C]

Ooh. I got to go to a porn shoots. Make sure they're not using.

[A]

They are very mean to me.

[B]

The.

[A]

The one with the beard said something very mean to me.

[B]

There's nothing I can do. I'm an actor as well, and I really don't want to get a bad reputation with these producers.

[A]

Oh, God.

[C]

Who do you study with?

[B]

Who was it?

[C]

Who do you study with?

[B]

Oh. Oh, Johnny Rao.

[C]

Oh, cool. Yeah, yeah, he's. He's in. Where's he getting.

[B]

Where's he Studio City?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

So you see, I, I, he's great. He's really great. I've heard about. Yeah, that's cool. That's cool. You. You like him?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I like him. Yeah. I'll send you the. You should join it.

[C]

Oh, you serious? Oh, that'd be great. Because, I mean, actually, I can't take the email from you right now just because you have my number. If you, if you don't text me, you don't text me.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Maybe we could get like a buffalo burger or something.

[A]

Again, things are not going very well for me.

[C]

Okay. Do you need some water?

[A]

It's not about that. I believe that these people are treating me very unfairly.

[B]

They have been treated important.

[A]

See?

[C]

What are you working with?

[A]

I play Toby in, in the movie, by the way.

[C]

Is he, is he background?

[B]

He's background.

[C]

Okay. I play Toby. I'm sorry, sir, can we have him? He needs to go back to the. You have to go to.

[A]

You can't take.

[C]

You have to go to. To holding this. Crafty is for first team.

[A]

I play Toby.

[B]

I want him offset. I want him offset that. Yes. Yeah. SAG Grup's rule. Okay. But we're here to try to figure out what our podcast is actually about. So do you have an idea for us?

[A]

Johnny's got a piece of paper.

[C]

I printed some stuff out. Okay, here we go.

[B]

This is classic Johnny right here.

[C]

You guys ready?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

This is my first idea. Okay. Water.

[B]

That is great.

[C]

Let me get. Last time I checked, there's a lot of it, and I check a lot. Lol. Water can be good and it can be bad. It can also be really important because let's face it, whatever you think about water, water isn't thinking about you.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

So let's face it. Lol. Water is here to stay. And here is. Are the. It's stories told by you listeners.

[A]

So there's something we're going to need, like, listeners to sort of call in.

[C]

Yeah. Send in your water stories. Like, you know, I saw a huge river. It was, oh, yeah, you can't swim in it.

[A]

We might not. I. That we'd have to probably like, kind of do some digging to get some audience responses, but maybe we could do that in post.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Okay. And we could just, we could just talk about water for now and.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Want to hear another idea?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Italian cooking. A podcast, and it's.

[B]

No, hold on, Donnas.

[C]

And it's a podcast about Italian. Okay, here's the thing. Here's the title of the podcast. It's called when you're here, your family. And it's a podcast about Italian cooking, how it's really good and how it's a family thing because you guys are Italian. So I thought that'd be a good.

[B]

That could be good. We could do it as.

[A]

I like that.

[C]

When you hear your family, you know,

[B]

we could kind of do Italian style voices.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

Water or Italian cooking.

[C]

The name of this. The name of the podcast is called when you hear your hear your family. And that's just. That's my original idea.

[B]

I think that that's what it is. And we're kind of like. When you're here, we're kind of like New Jersey. Like. Like Italian Americans. Okay, maybe. And we're kind of like talking about Italian.

[C]

But you guys are Italian.

[B]

I am not.

[C]

Come on, man.

[B]

I. I have to be honest with you. I can't. I mean. Okay, I'm Italian. I'm Italian.

[C]

You're Italian?

[B]

Yeah. You're Italian.

[A]

I might be. Not that I know of.

[B]

You got to be a little.

[A]

There's probably something.

[B]

There's got to be Italian.

[C]

Isn't your Nona from the old country?

[B]

Yes, he knows about her. Nona.

[A]

My Nona is. Yeah, she's from the old country?

[C]

Yeah. That means you're Italian.

[B]

Yeah. And are you Italian?

[C]

Oh, no. I wish. God, I want to be so bad.

[B]

Yeah. So you knew that I'm being Italian?

[C]

Yeah. Because I followed you guys forever, you know, from back in the day. You guys always do that Sunday dinner thing.

[B]

We do the Sunday dinner.

[A]

Sunday gravy.

[B]

Sunday gravy. And get the. Get the bones going and get all the flavor out of the bones.

[C]

Yeah. That's something that my people have struggled with for centuries.

[B]

What are your people?

[C]

I don't even know. It's like. It's like Welsh, maybe Welsh, right. And they're just like, am I Irish or am I Scottish? Am I English? I'm nobody.

[A]

Right.

[B]

That's kind of what I think of Welsh people. Just nobody.

[C]

Welsh is just trying to be. Because the Irish, obviously. Oh, man, they're doing so good.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

Are you Irish and Italian?

[B]

Yes, definitely Irish.

[C]

You could call it lucky meatballs. I have the name of your podcast.

[A]

Oh, that's great.

[B]

Me Lucky Meatballs.

[C]

Lucky Meatballs. Or how about this Silly. No, I'm trying to think about that. Silly spumoni. Silly spumoni.

[A]

Four leaf. Oh, ravioli.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Leprechaun linguine.

[A]

That's good.

[C]

Bam.

[B]

That's good.

[C]

Write that down. Leprechaun linguine.

[A]

Well, let's. Well, so are we doing. When you're here, your family?

[B]

I mean, do you like that or water?

[A]

Do I like.

[B]

Yeah, what do you like?

[A]

I love them both. I think that Johnny can't do wrong.

[C]

It's your podcast.

[B]

All right, we're gonna do. I think we're gonna do Italian. Italian food.

[C]

Food.

[B]

All right. And when you hear your family. When you hear your family is the name of the podcast, and it's about what were all the things the Italian food, you know, like.

[C]

Nona. Oh. This is the thing I think about a lot when, you know, when you. When you go to an Italian family dinner, it's always like, hey, just so you know, Grandma's gonna wanna. You know, when you're done, she's gonna want you to have more, and you gotta be like, no, thank you. But then you gotta accept.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[C]

Cause it's like. Like they want to feed you.

[A]

Yeah, well, forgive me, but I would like to accept, and I would like another. I would like another course. And because we're coming back with.

[B]

When you're here, family, can't wait to

[A]

get you in the Batcave. Hey, Gabagos, how we going? How we doing? We waiting.

[C]

How we doing? How we doing?

[B]

Hey, Michelle, queue up the music, huh?

[A]

Hey, Rochelle, come on.

[C]

Oh, my God, you're. Nona. She's wonderful. She's wonderful. Oh, my gosh.

[B]

Yeah. You know what? You know what I like? You know what I love? I love.

[A]

I love you. This guy can tell me what he loves again. Great. Oh, here we go.

[B]

Busting my balls over here. Busting my meatballs over here. What, so I can't say what I love, huh?

[C]

I didn't know you were. I didn't know that Paulie was your cousin. I had no idea. Okay. Yeah, yeah. I love the guy.

[A]

Come here. Come here.

[C]

Hey. Ah.

[B]

Oh, you like imagining Paulie's here? Something and you. He's like.

[C]

He's right there.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Give him a kid. Give me a kiss.

[A]

That's nice.

[B]

Hey, give me a kiss.

[C]

I said no more. Okay? Go out with your brother and stop hitting him in the face. These kids.

[B]

Look, I love Paulie, but he's a pain in the ass. He's my. Of course. He's my cousin. I love him. I always am gonna love him.

[C]

You always did like Paulie, didn't you?

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I kind of feel bad for the guy, you know? He's got. He's got he can't really walk right. You know, and he can't really think right.

[C]

He can't.

[B]

He wasn't really born right. He doesn't really.

[C]

He can't walk right. He can't walk. He can't walk right.

[A]

Oh, here we go. You should not have said that.

[B]

My meatballs again.

[C]

He can't walk right.

[B]

Yeah. You talking about my gig?

[A]

One leg the size of, you know, one over your leg, you got a strand of spaghetti.

[C]

Maybe I got some parmigiano in my ears here, but did you just say that he can't walk right?

[B]

That's what I said.

[C]

I don't know. Maybe I've got like some fajoul on my ears here.

[B]

Let me check out your ears right there. Oh, we got some faji right there.

[C]

Maybe I got a bunch of fucking meatballs in my ear right now. What doing are you. And it sounds like you just said that he can't walk too good. I don't know. Did I hear that?

[B]

That's exactly what I said. What's the problem?

[A]

Hey, guys, you know, make me chill out, you know?

[B]

You got a problem with that?

[A]

We need to get all worked up about this.

[B]

I can't walk right either.

[C]

Yeah, you can't. Yeah, I remember when you were this big.

[B]

What does that have to do with how I walk?

[C]

What does it have to do with. What's it got to do with you asking me a question?

[B]

No, I was just saying, why should

[A]

it help me do it?

[C]

How?

[A]

I want you to relax and talk about the food.

[C]

Hey.

[B]

Hey.

[A]

Wait.

[B]

Hey. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

[A]

Kid, wait. Hey.

[B]

What?

[C]

I love you. I'm breaking your balls.

[B]

Breaking my balls. I knew he was breaking my balls. And I was having a great time and I felt great. You know why? Because when you hear your family, when you hear your family, that's what it's all about. You told us. When you hear your family, that's what we'll talk about. With Beck and Kyle. Yeah, that's the. That's a.

[A]

That's a song. You know, they say. With Beck and Kyle. This ain't with Beck and Kyle. This is with.

[B]

With. With Brioni and Kylino. Kylino.

[A]

My name's G. This is Gallo.

[B]

This is our friend. This is our guest.

[C]

My name is Gallo. I have been to Italy miniple times. Many times. I've been to the old country of Italy. I have touched the cypress trees with my hands. Okay.

[B]

Oh, wow. Wow. Let me touch those hands right here.

[C]

Madonna.

[B]

That's a blessing right There.

[C]

Madonna. When.

[A]

When you have Madonna.

[B]

When.

[A]

Da Vinci.

[C]

Da Vinci, One of our. One of us.

[B]

Da Vinci, one of the best.

[C]

Leonardo da Vinci, one of the greatest painters, inventors. The man alone. The paintings alone, he could retire, right? But he did more. He invented the flying guy.

[A]

The guy was flying

[B]

before, you know, it's a man.

[C]

It's how you. It's flying. The first flying was da Vinci.

[B]

Really?

[C]

He showed you that? This is how you can do it.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And that's how we now have a. Helicopters, right?

[B]

I think, you know, we don't get enough credit for that.

[C]

Not never. They would never give us enough credit. They never would.

[B]

No. Italians. Italians are the best Italian people. Italian culture is number one. Better than any culture in the world. All right?

[A]

Hey, you said it. If I. If, you know, honestly, if I could kill every other person, I would.

[C]

Hey. Oh, oh.

[B]

If you're not Italian, I honestly see you. Oh, we don't need you.

[C]

Hey, what about, you know, we got guys from my, you know, from a. You know, we got guys from my.

[A]

What planet Mars? What the are you talking about?

[B]

What are you talking about?

[C]

What about Switzerland?

[A]

Hey, don't say that in front of me.

[B]

What do we got, a horse over here?

[C]

I took a horse head and put it in somebody's bedroom. Look out. Yeah, Godfather, I've seen that. I've got it on Blu Ray dvd. So, you know, I've watched it.

[B]

The horse, the horse and the badass assignment. You know, somebody's gonna try to come in, trying to come and kill you.

[A]

All right, well, you know, the thing is, we're a little off topic. We're supposed to talk about whatever, what no one's been making. What we do every Sunday when we get together. I gu. Start just motion down. And then when you get another course and you're like, that was really good. So I gotta know. Okay, we talking easy question here, right? We got. We're here with our buddy, right?

[B]

Galliono. For the record.

[A]

Gallion for.

[C]

Gallion for braze.

[A]

Okay, first question. Everybody go ahead and chime in.

[B]

Right? Right.

[A]

Best type of pasta. What's she gonna tell your mama that. Hey, that's not. That's exactly what I want right there.

[B]

Wait for me. Gaganala. Gaganelli. Gaganelli.

[C]

Penne.

[B]

Penne. Penny, what about you, Penny, what about you, dude?

[C]

Oh, this guy. This guy coming in with Kylie. Know. Oh, I love it. I love it, I love it.

[B]

I love it. Dude. When he says, yeah, what kind of.

[C]

What about you?

[B]

What kind of parts are you Trying to eat on.

[A]

You know, I'm gonna say, every day is a different story. Right?

[C]

Every day is different.

[B]

Every. Every noodle shape is a different story.

[A]

Every meal tells a story.

[B]

Right, right, right.

[C]

I. Every time.

[A]

Every tomato tells a story. Every onion.

[B]

Every story tells a different story. Every story. Every movie tells a different story.

[C]

You're doing literal poetry in front of me right now. Where you saying these words about the stories that we keep, the food, the traditions, everywhere I pick up, there's a traditional story.

[A]

There's a story behind the force.

[C]

From Nona, who has made these. The big meatballs, you know, this freaking big.

[A]

You know, she made them the size of.

[C]

Size of a basketball.

[B]

Right, right.

[A]

Or even bigger than a basketball.

[C]

Even bigger than a basketball.

[B]

Bigger than a basketball.

[A]

But, yeah, I'll say today, angel hair.

[C]

Angel hair.

[B]

Angel hair pasta.

[C]

Wow. Because it holds the sauce in such a way that nothing else is going to do that for you. Nothing else is going to hold the source quite like an angel pasta.

[B]

Now that's. Now that's an authentic.

[A]

You sound weird, man.

[C]

Hey, you know what? I've been in the old country for a while.

[B]

We're busting your balls.

[C]

I'm breaking my own balls here. I was in collaboration. Calabrini.

[B]

Calabrini.

[C]

I was in Calabrini. I went up to Emilio Romani and.

[B]

Hey, for me, that's a home run.

[A]

Red sauce or white sauce? Where you staying?

[B]

Come on. What are you talking about here? White sauce. What am I like a little. Little preteen in America?

[C]

Oh, you said the white sauce is for. For the utes, I think.

[B]

White sauce, yes. For the use of chicken, you know, chicken Alfredo. Alfredo.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, because, I mean, I do a lot, but, you know, what about a little.

[A]

I agree. I shouldn't have said that.

[B]

Kylino. It's okay. I agree.

[C]

Give me a Bolognese and get the freak out of here.

[B]

Yeah, I like a nice chunky bowl.

[C]

Oh, get out of here with that chunk. Get out of town with that.

[B]

What about you? What you eat now? What you going with? You put the angel hair past.

[A]

I don't know. Maybe. Maybe I shouldn't throw in my 2 cents. I feel pretty dumb about the question now.

[C]

You like.

[B]

Hey, hey, hey. We all get. We all get down on ourselves sometimes. Hey, let me finish. Let me finish what I'm about to say.

[C]

Mental health.

[B]

We all get down on ourselves. We're all really hard on ourselves. Okay? You know, we. We. We came from nothing. We built something. We're doing incredible. We love our families.

[A]

We Have.

[B]

We're doing. We're doing everything we can, you know, we're doing our best. We get up every day. Are we successful? No. But that doesn't stop us.

[C]

Every day, you gotta do the day. Doesn't matter what comes your way. You say, hey, today I'm doing the day. I get out of my frickin way.

[B]

Yeah. You go, forget about it.

[C]

You say, forget about it. Give me some of that.

[B]

Yeah, you didn't see.

[A]

I guess I'm just starting to feel like we've been doing his podcast for

[C]

now, what, 20 years.

[A]

I still forget your name, your guests, every single episode.

[C]

Just call me Cousin G. Okay, Cousin Gallo.

[A]

I don't see the audience growing.

[B]

Right?

[A]

Look, these clips, they're not circulating it because I see these other guys clips, the meatball brothers.

[C]

The Meatball's a comedy tour because they're

[B]

making the food on the show.

[C]

These clips go.

[A]

These clips go so viral.

[B]

Right, right. And we. And we're being vulnerable. We're opening it up. We're talking about how hard we work and how life. How hard our life is.

[C]

How hard. How hard our life.

[A]

And I see. And then, you know, now, of course, it's all about, oh, you gotta have like the perfect look.

[B]

Right?

[A]

You know, you gotta look at me, you know, I got this thing, you

[B]

know, I got this. I got a new shoulder. You know, I got a new kneecap.

[A]

And it's like, what happened to just being you? You know, it's like we've been working on this thing for so long, and I still feel like, you know, we're sort of pioneers of this thing and always giving us an ounce of respect, you know what I'm saying? And I've been trying hard and I bought. I actually, you know, it.

[B]

Right.

[A]

I'm sure I've told you this before.

[C]

What did you tell me?

[B]

I.

[A]

This all I. I invested in this equipment. I hand built this.

[C]

Oh, you built this. This is quality.

[A]

We started out in my aunties. We started out. You remember this?

[B]

I remember this.

[A]

We started my auntie's condo down on 467 Bono Boulevard. And then we had. We only had one microphone. We only had one microphone. We'd all gather.

[B]

It didn't even work. It just. It looked like. Like it was the outside of a microphone.

[A]

Exactly.

[C]

You guys never told me that.

[B]

Yeah, it didn't work.

[A]

We've been doing this for that long.

[C]

This time I thought that microphone worked.

[A]

We only brought you in when we linked up with head gum.

[C]

Yeah. But I was. Can I say this. I've been a fan.

[B]

Of course you can.

[C]

Cause I've been a fan from the beginning. I've been the one you say there's no support out there. I've been watching you. These other guys, they're buying. They're doing bots. They're doing bots, right?

[B]

I was wondering about that because I seen it. I seen it online.

[C]

It's for real. I seen it online. I got a kid who works in my store, shows me stuff on his phone. You wouldn't believe this stuff he's showing

[B]

me, like, pasta or something.

[C]

Stuff. This stuff that looks like. It looks like pasta. Turns out it's a piece of cake.

[B]

Oh, my God. I see that. Is it Cake with Mikey Day? If you can do a fun show, that guy was.

[A]

What is wrong? Is he stupid?

[B]

He's very stupid. That's. That's what's funny about it. He doesn't know if it's cake or not.

[A]

I love that.

[B]

Sometimes it's like a big pasta bowl, A. A big old spaghetti, and it's like. It's cake.

[C]

Fool me. I'm watching that. I'm like, oh, that's. That's definitely not cake. They cut it wide open. It's a freaking shoe. It's got cake in it.

[B]

That's crazy. That's what happened. You never seen his cake?

[C]

You seen.

[B]

He's a cake.

[A]

No, my brother. My. My.

[C]

You know.

[B]

You know Greggy?

[A]

You know Vinny Dabliani?

[B]

Oh, Vinny Dabliani.

[C]

Vinny Dabliani.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

Well, you got a problem with Vinny Dabliani?

[C]

Yeah. Cause he owes me money from way back, bro.

[B]

Watch out.

[A]

Yeah, because I was gonna say what he told me is that apparently when they do these fake cakes. Because I don't know. I never seen the show.

[B]

I don't know. I don't know. What? I don't know. I don't know up and down about how to do it, but I love watching it.

[A]

Apparently, when they do these fake cakes, they.

[C]

They what? Just say it. You can say it. You're among friends.

[B]

Yeah, sorry. Don't be embarrassed.

[C]

Say it. Just say what they do to the cakes.

[A]

Well, just say, you know, they cream them in a very specific fashion. Apparently. They jack off, Mikey. They.

[C]

They jack them off into the cake. They fill it up like a balloon.

[A]

Wait, wait, hold on, hold on. Wait.

[C]

No.

[B]

This is. This is actually groundbreaking crap right here. You tell me that this is a friend of yours that works on the show.

[C]

A friend of ours or friend of

[B]

yours told you this that Anna is a cake. They got Mikey Day creaming the cakes from the inside.

[A]

I don't know what's happening is what I heard.

[B]

Why do they do that?

[C]

I'll tell you one thing. I'm not touching cake for a long time.

[B]

I don't. For a long time. I wanted to be against judging on that show and try to cake cake, you know, do the judging, try the cake afterwards. I want to do that.

[A]

That's why, you know, I avoid the cake over a cannoli right now.

[B]

That's a cake.

[C]

If you want to ask me where I'm gonna have a, you know, a little bit taste something like that good, I'm pretty much always gonna go with somebody got a little chocolate chip in there.

[B]

Yeah,

[A]

absolutely.

[B]

Hey, you know what? Yeah, you know, hey, they can go cream of the cakes. Mikey Day can. Cream of the cakes on easy Cake.

[A]

Funny guy, by the way. Amazing writer at snl.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

This is something I heard from video.

[B]

Incredible body, too, by the way. He could drink milkshakes all day. He used to stick. He's just all muscle.

[A]

Eats plain hamburgers.

[B]

I heard he eats plain hamburgers and just, like, shakes from.

[C]

We talking about plain hamburger. That means, like, it's got no bun on it. We talking about plain burgers.

[A]

Like, it's got, like, buns in the burger. That's it.

[B]

The guy eats like Richie Rich, like a little kid.

[C]

But I was on the planet because when you a guy, you know, just like the piece of meat, there's no bun on the plate.

[A]

That's what I tell him. Exactly.

[B]

Yeah. Well, this. I feel like this was the best episode yet. Because when you hear your family and we covered it all, we got each other's backs. We busted our balls a little bit. We talked about. We talked about Johnny Gardiani, and we talked about using cake. And we. And you know, ultimately, cannoli is king.

[A]

And can I say one thing? If you come after Nona's recipe, you ain't gonna get it.

[C]

Hey, hey.

[A]

You think that you gonna come in

[B]

here, we gotta get Nona special.

[A]

You gotta get two cups of garlic, three cups of this, four cups of cream. Fuck you.

[B]

Fuck you. You ain't getting Nona's recipe.

[C]

Wherever the camera is, whoever there, whoever's looking at this. If you're looking at me, I'm looking at you double time. If you're coming after their Nona's recipe, you're gonna have to walk through a fricking wall called my dick.

[B]

That's right.

[A]

Cause you know what?

[B]

It's basically. It's your nonna's recipe too. Cause when you hear your family, you hear your family.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

All right.

[A]

All right.

[B]

To the a. Keep your family bond strong and keep. Keep growing your family by. By having intercourse.

[A]

Life's a doodle. Have a noodle.

[B]

Hey, can you take us out with a music Rochelle? And take yourself with the music Rochelle.

[C]

I very much respect you letting me do ding dong on this zone.

[B]

Absolutely. Yeah. Ding dong all you want. Hey, pretty. Appreciate you. Hey, hey. See you next week on the in the Noodle Cave.

[A]

See you around many. And

[B]

rest in peace.

[A]

God is good.

[B]

Bless.

[A]

Wow, that was great. That was.

[B]

That was a fantastic podcast.

[C]

It was fun.

[B]

You know, we really got into a groove there at the end. Think I do want to apologize to all of our Italian American fans and.

[C]

Why you apologizing?

[B]

Oh, I don't know. Just had nothing to do with the podcast. We just did. I just wanted to apologize to them.

[C]

I thought we were just doing a. A version of the Sopranos that was unwritten.

[B]

Yes, yes, there. Sopranos.

[C]

A Sopranos unwritten episode of Sopranos.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, we taking the Soprano characters. But I had a blast. That was.

[C]

Yeah, I. I had a blast too.

[A]

And so fun to, you know, catch up with you. Johnny. I feel like last time I saw you was at the 51st jokes.

[C]

And it had been a long time before that.

[A]

It had been. That was. And that was a very. I wonder if we've had anyone on the show who was there for that because that was a. I hate to say it, a sweet, nostalgic evening because it was a lot of folks who probably, like, were hanging around with each other in like 2008 and 2009.

[C]

Yeah, a lot of people who. It's just the relevancy is going down.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Relevancy is waning.

[B]

But it is. It is always so great to see you because we do have that connection how we all kind of like.

[A]

And.

[B]

And can I say it is really nice.

[A]

Yeah, I feel like, oh, I've always loved your comedy and I think a great pillar even back then. Like, oh, Johnny's doing really funny stuff.

[C]

You guys, too. I mean, it's all the same two way street.

[B]

Yeah. Well, it's great to have out now. Mermaid is out now.

[C]

It is. I think so. Yeah.

[B]

John, Johnny plays a. Can I say a Percocet?

[A]

Sure.

[C]

I mean, you can say however you want. He's a. He's like a loser. I say he's a loser. A drug addicted loser.

[B]

Did you wait and Real quick, quick, quick question, Quick answer. Whatever you want. It could be long. Did you. Did you do much prep to get in character for this guy? Or was it kind of like. Or was it a simple switch?

[C]

No, it was a lot. It was the most I've ever done.

[B]

Did you study a lot of, like, the effects of pills? Because you did seem like somebody who was drifting.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Through life in a way that was. It was very real. Like, to me, it was an incredible performance.

[C]

I had some experience, not from, like, recreational use, but when I had surgery years ago, I had took a lot of that type of drug. So, you know, I knew enough.

[B]

You know what it does.

[C]

I know what it's like.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And, yeah. But, yeah, it was a fun. It was a hard character to get out of, honestly. Took me a couple months. I didn't realize it until it was like, oh, shit.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Why do you. Why do you think that is? Because was it kind of relaxing in a way? Like, was it kind of enjoyable to be in that and you didn't really want to leave it?

[C]

Yeah, I think it's a thing where I became, like, someone very different than who I normally am because I had to slow down so much, and. And I just started living in that. And it took me a while to realize, oh, wait, this isn't how I live in the world. I just kind of got stuck in it. Cause I didn't have anything pulling me out of it. And it wasn't until I actually. Duncan, my friend Duncan was like, hey, man, are you okay? And I was like, yeah. He's like, I think you're not. And I was like, oh, yeah. I probably should shave and, like, you know, do some stuff that's different than that character.

[B]

Yeah. That's the type of thing that somebody would say to that character.

[C]

Yeah. Because he's, like, so, like, slow and heavy and encumbered and stuff that it was like. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Well, it worked. It was very believable.

[C]

I like.

[B]

It's fun, and I'm excited for people to see it.

[C]

Yeah, me too.

[B]

See Mermaid. Thank you so much for coming.

[A]

Anything else you want to plug?

[C]

That's pretty. Yes. That's a good one.

[B]

That's a good one.

[C]

You can watch Fallout if you haven't watched it yet.

[B]

Hell, yeah.

[A]

And join our Patreon.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Patreon.com. what's our podcast? It's. It's where the fun stuff is happening.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And we're interacting with our. With our fellow fans, which has been.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

It's nice. We talked about that a little bit,

[C]

but talk about, like, it's like a chill thing. Yeah.

[B]

All right, well, Kyle, do you want to tell people to see him next week?

[A]

I do. See you next week in the bat cave. What's Our Podcast is a Headgun podcast created and hosted by Beck Bennett and Kyle Mooney.

[B]

The show is produced and engineered by Rochelle Chen and any Kanefskaya with production support from Ali Khan and Ryan Lutzow.

[A]

Our executive producer is Anya Kanevskaya. Katie Moose is our VP of content at Headgum. Our theme music is made by us.

[B]

For more podcasts by headgum, visit headcom.com or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.

[C]

Hi, I am Mandy Moore.

[B]

Sterling K. Brown. And I'm Chris Sullivan. And we host the podcast that Was Us now on Headgum.

[C]

Each episode, we're going to go into

[A]

a deep dive from our show.

[C]

This is Us.

[B]

That's right.

[A]

We're going to go episode by episode. We're also going to pepp in episodes with different guest stars and writers and casting directors.

[B]

Are we going to cry? Yes, a little bit. Are we going to laugh a lot?

[C]

A whole lot.

[B]

That's what I'm hoping, man. Listen to that was Us on your favorite podcast app. Or watch full video episodes on YouTube or Spotify. New episodes every Tuesday.