Mark L. Walberg on Being Temptation Island’s Unofficial Therapist

Summary

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Podcast Summary:

What's the Reality? – Mark L. Walberg on Being Temptation Island’s Unofficial Therapist

Date: April 22, 2026
Host: Amber Desiree (AD)
Guest: Mark L. Walberg

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Episode Overview

In this lively, candid conversation, Amber Desiree sits down with longtime Temptation Island host Mark L. Walberg to explore his unique role as the show’s unofficial therapist and reality TV elder statesman. They dig into his unexpectedly winding career path, the evolution of reality dating shows, his approach to empathy and hosting, generational changes in relationships, and why vulnerability on TV resonates so deeply. Expect discussion of memorable cast moments, heartfelt advice, behind-the-scenes stories, and Walberg’s thoughtful philosophy on personal growth, both onscreen and off.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Mark’s Entry Into TV & Hosting

• Early Career Journey ([02:02]–[04:36])

  • Started in musical theater, which led him to California for a "gap year."
  • Became a “warm-up” comedian by happenstance at Dick Clark Productions.
  • Shifted from production to onscreen talent after Dick Clark handed him the mic.
  • Pivoted back and forth between warm-up gigs and hosting, including a talk show that was cancelled.
  • Landed the Temptation Island job after boldly telling a network exec:

    “I should be hosting your fucking shows.” ([04:00], Mark Walberg)

• Career Resilience

  • Talks openly about the humbling nature of TV, losing jobs, and finding his place.
  • Reflected on the importance of self-worth:

    “If you don’t know your worth, nobody’s gonna know your worth.” ([04:42], Mark Walberg)

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2. The Origin and Impact of Temptation Island

• First Seasons and Format Evolution ([05:00]–[07:26])

  • Early seasons were unscripted and experimental.
  • Filmed on a remote “Gilligan’s Island” vibe with real beach bonfires.
  • Mark credits early producers for focusing on emotional intelligence before it was a buzzword.

• Generational Changes on Set

  • Notes how his own presence has evolved:

    “I used to be like, uncle Vibe… then it was dad… now it’s like, great Grandpa.” ([07:41], Mark Walberg)

  • Enjoys the generational interplay behind the scenes and on camera.

• Influence on Dating Shows ([08:26]–[10:23])

  • Mark contends The Bachelor was inspired as a direct answer to Temptation Island.
  • Reflects on how attitudes toward sex, dating, and gender roles have shifted, often for the better, with younger generations leading the way.

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3. Mark’s Unique Hosting Style: Empathy Over Script

• Empathetic Listening ([11:12]–[13:13])

  • Mark’s “therapist” presence comes from deep, survival-born empathy:

    “It’s not the words that people say I’m listening to...it’s why we chose those words.” ([11:55], Mark Walberg)

  • Developed an ability to read unspoken feelings out of self-preservation growing up in the South.

• Advice Philosophy

  • Intentionally tries to help, not judge.
  • Wants to “facilitate them coming out of their shoes” rather than prescribe answers.

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4. Relationship Wisdom and Lessons from His Marriage

• Marriage with Robby Since 1987 ([15:22]–[18:20])

  • Grew up together, weathered conflict, never considered leaving as an option.
  • Jokes about “appropriating” Robby’s wisdom and reading:

    “I go on TV and go, you know, Ram Dass said…and I’m like, completely appropriating everything she’s taught me.” ([15:39], Mark Walberg)

  • Stresses importance of humility and awareness in relationships:

    “The hardest part in personal development is not people that have no emotional intelligence, it’s people who have none but think they do.” ([17:33], Mark Walberg)

• Perspective on Marriage & Companionship

  • Says the comfort of having a partner is less about romance, more about facing the world:

    “Marriage is like...life can deal you some shit. And it’s easier...‘I’m here with you.’” ([18:56], Mark Walberg)

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5. The Show’s Emotional Resonance & Why People Join

• Authenticity and Vulnerability ([23:05]–[30:29])

  • Bonfires are about drawing out participants’ real emotions, not performance.
  • Notes how men, in particular, have begun to break down walls and be seen crying:

    “What I was just trying to encourage him to do is you don’t have to front with me.” ([24:05], Mark Walberg)

  • Candidly discusses the psychological relief some feel having difficult conversations on TV rather than at home.

• Clout vs. Clarity ([27:17]–[30:08])

  • Recognizes both genuine existential crises and the desire for public recognition (“clout”) as motivators.
  • Tells contestants honesty will benefit both their relationships and influencer ambitions.

• Social Media’s Impact on Reality TV ([30:29]–[32:08])

  • Old reality TV participants were “sublebrities”; now anyone can be a content creator.

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6. Hosting Across Generations

• Adapting to Language and Culture ([32:08]–[34:38])
  • Stresses the importance of listening and learning new generational “languages” to connect meaningfully.
  • Humorous reluctance to use newer slang (“slay”, “fleek”):

    “Me slaying is a state of being. Me saying it is appropriating words I shouldn’t be saying.” ([34:45], Mark Walberg)

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7. Does Temptation Island Reveal or Create Problems? ([35:22]–[38:01])

• Mark argues that while the show’s premise brings existing problems to light, it often uncovers deeper root issues that participants may not have realized.

• Observes:

  “Most people come to the islands with their fingers pointed ... but you can’t control that...You gotta either work on you, or you don’t do anything.” ([35:53]; [36:31], Mark Walberg)

• Emphasizes individuals only change if they do inner work; the show is just a catalyst, not a cure.

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8. Season Two Deep Dives & Behind the Scenes

• Mikey & Sydney Storyline ([44:52]–[48:45])
  • Gives honest assessments without judgment, respecting both their public pain and growth.
  • Highlights Sydney’s “truth bomb” energy and how Mikey’s people-pleasing can be self-defeating.
  • Mark often finds staying in touch with participants rewarding and tries to support them even after filming ends ([50:31]–[51:51]).

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9. Listener Relationship Q&A

• Brittany P.’s Dilemma: Husband is too generous, she wants to save ([52:42]–[54:54])

  • Mark: “You can be both [mean and logical]...We need to be each other's checks and balances.”
  • Focus on intentional, loving communication and balancing generosity with mutual goals.

• Mariama’s Dilemma: Ex wants to reunite but isn’t honest ([55:00]–[57:46])

  • Mark advises self-evaluation and transparent conversation.
  • Stresses: “You don’t need a man. You get to have a man if you want a man...Be the buyer, not the seller.”

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10. Closing Thoughts and Mark’s Next Chapter

• Future Plans ([57:53]–[59:57])
  • Intends to focus more on his podcast, aiming for deeper emotional conversations with reality stars.
  • Considering writing a book but isn’t set on it yet.
  • “When I’m at a loss for what to do next, ... the answer is to be open to what I’m supposed to be doing and wait for that sign.”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On setting boundaries during career lows:

  “Your boy’s got to work—and there’s no shame in feeding those kids.” ([03:39], Mark Walberg)

• On generational learning:

  “If the gray haired crowd that are supposed to be my age will listen to your crowd, we’d be a little bit better off.” ([10:23], Mark Walberg)

• On masculinity and vulnerability:

  “I like the fact that the boys are in their feelings. I think that’s healthy for us all to witness.” ([40:36], Mark Walberg)

• Relationship advice distilled:

  “Be the buyer, not the seller. Look, I’m good. If you can enhance my good—come on!” ([57:34], Mark Walberg)

• On community and marriage:

  “If I wasn’t married, I’d be dead. I would have just not eaten.” ([18:56], Mark Walberg)

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Important Timestamps

• [02:02]–[04:36]: Mark’s TV origin story & ‘host your fucking shows’ moment
• [05:00]–[07:26]: Early Temptation Island—unscripted, emotional
• [08:26]–[10:23]: Show’s impact on dating TV landscape and generational shifts
• [15:22]–[18:20]: Wisdom and lessons from a decades-long marriage
• [23:05]–[25:05]: Mark’s approach to empathy on bonfires
• [27:17]–[30:29]: Why people join and the authenticity/clout balance
• [35:22]–[38:01]: Does the show reveal or create problems?
• [44:52]–[48:45]: Deep dive into Mikey & Sydney’s journey
• [52:42]–[54:54]: Listener Q&A—advice on managing generosity in marriage
• [55:00]–[57:46]: Listener Q&A—navigating trust with an ex-partner
• [57:53]–[59:57]: Mark’s next moves and spiritual approach to change

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Tone & Style

The conversation is playful, honest, and deeply empathetic with lots of humor between Mark and Amber. Mark is warm, generous, and insightful, willing to poke fun at himself and open up about past vulnerabilities. Advice is delivered conversationally, with humility and self-awareness.

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Takeaways

• Mark’s longevity and emotional resonance as a reality host stem from his deep, often hard-earned empathy and his genuine investment in helping contestants grow.
• The emotional mess of reality TV is both a mirror for audiences and a rare space for people to do real relational work—sometimes more so than in their offscreen lives.
• Generational knowledge transfer and vulnerability are recurring themes—Mark is admired for bridging divides with curiosity and care.
• Listeners get both reality TV tea and universally applicable wisdom about relationships, self-worth, and authenticity.

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Transcript

[Host (Ad)]

Based on the best selling book series by Elle Kennedy comes off campus a story of love.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Last week, you didn't even know her name. Sometimes people sneak up on you.

[Host (Ad)]

Friendship. This is the most absolutely unhinged planet and I'm obsessed with it and self discovery on and off the ice. It's scary telling the world something I'm not ready for it to know. Oh, and it's pretty steamy.

[Mark Wahlberg]

This is the part where I tell you all the things I want to do to you. Off campus is now streaming on Prime Video.

[Host (Ad)]

I'm Kiana and I leveled up my business with Shopify.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Once I figured out that Shopify was a thing, I never turned back.

[Host (Ad)]

I can create a site with my eyes closed. Shopify thinks ahead of us, you know,

[Mark Wahlberg]

and it thinks about the customer more than anything. Every day I'm thinking about some other new business, but Shopify is doing it to me because it's so easy to use. It's like I can't stop.

[Host (Ad)]

I'm addicted.

[Mark Wahlberg]

To start your free [e-mail].

[Host (Ad)]

You guys, what's up? Welcome to another episode of what's the reality? It's your girl ad and I am here with a wonderful guest. You guys help me welcome Mark Wahlberg, Temptation island host. And what are we on season two right now?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Season two? Netflix. Season two.

[Host (Ad)]

Netflix. Season two.

[Mark Wahlberg]

A gazillion for me. I've been on like 12 Netflix.

[Host (Ad)]

You've been here from the beginning, but season two is out currently.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Yeah.

[Host (Ad)]

How are you feeling?

[Mark Wahlberg]

You know, I'm feeling great. It's a trip for me because when we shoot the thing.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I do my thing and then I don't hang out with everybody while all the messes happen. And then it gets into a show and I watch the show. Like, I'm a fan. Yeah.

[Host (Ad)]

I'm like, oh, I didn't see that. Right, right, right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

So my wife and I have been enjoying it.

[Host (Ad)]

I love it. Okay, so before we get think of Temptation island. For the people who may not be familiar with your story or how you got into the entertainment business in general, let's let them know who. Who was Mark.

[Mark Wahlberg]

You know what's funny is it all happened not far from this studio.

[Host (Ad)]

Really?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Yeah. So I was in South Carolina. Boy, I don't know how far back to go, but I was in college in South Carolina. I auditioned for this musical theater thing for the summer. Kind of did that thing that led to a tour that meant I was going to miss my sophomore year of college first semester. So I came to California for a gap year.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Long story short, after several years, I met my now wife, we got engaged, we went to work on a cruise ship for six months. We came off the ship, got married, and I'm like, one of us has to get a job.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And I got a job at Dick Clark Productions around the corner from here.

[Host (Ad)]

Oh, wow.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And I was just like, I'll just. I don't have a degree. I'm. I'm already old and I haven't even started. So I just am going to try to learn TV from the bottom up. And I was doing that, and then one day we're doing a TV show and the warm up comedian wasn't there. And Dick Clark said, well, you know, Mark's funny, and pulled me aside and says, you'll be fine, and gave me the mic. And he didn't know I had this background on stage before this. And I did my thing. I didn't know I had a thing. Yeah, I did my thing. Just kind of hang out with the audience. And that became sort of the first step of me taking a left turn to being what they call talent as opposed to production. And one thing led to another and I hosted. You know, I. They needed a warm up. I wanted to do a warm up job, but they needed an announcer. So I ended up being an announcer and then I had to start hosting my own stuff.

[Host (Ad)]

That's so.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I mean, that's. That's basically.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah. Okay, well, how did you. Because you're the original host of.

[Mark Wahlberg]

So then I had hosted some stuff and then I had a Talk show in 95 and then that got canceled and then nobody wanted to hire me. And I had two young children and a wife. I'm like, your boy's got to work.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And there's no shame in feeding those kids.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

So I went back to being a warmup guy and people were like throwing shade at me, really. Like I was show up and they were looking at me like, poor guy.

[Host (Ad)]

He was on Billboards last year.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And I'm like, you know, and it was rough, but I was like grinding it out. So the story was that I got called to do this warm up job for a new reality show, which was who Wants to Marry a Millionaire? It's like one of these first big reality shows with Darva Conger and whatever. And it was in Vegas they wanted me to do warmup and I was pretty salty at this point. I was kind of done. And so I did the warmup and it went great and the show was great. And Then everybody's patting the selves on the back after the show going, oh, great show. And I walked up basically to say, I'm leaving. And the head of the network turned around, says, you're great. You should do warm up for all our shows. And I. I don't know, I was feeling myself. And I said, I should be hosting your fucking shows. And walk up the stage. Yeah, drop the F bomb and everything. Totally out of character. Oh, and two weeks later, I got a call to audition for this thing called Temptation Island.

[Host (Ad)]

Okay, I need to put that in my notes, say, I'm the fucking host and walk off. Got it.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I think the lesson for me is, if you don't know your worth, nobody's gonna know your worth.

[Host (Ad)]

That is true.

[Mark Wahlberg]

You don't stand ten toes for you. They're gonna mirror wherever you're at.

[Host (Ad)]

Come on, Mark. He's spitting over here. I know. That's right. Okay, so what was the craziest thing you remember from your first season of Temptation Island?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Well, the first season, you gotta remember that reality TV as we know it now wasn't a thing, right? Survivor had come out, Big Brother had come out, and Temptation island was like, what if we did, like, like Survivor vibe, but it was dating. And so rather than committing to it being on the air, they just sent us to Belize, said, just shoot six or seven episodes. It's cheaper than doing a pilot. So I had no idea what I'm getting into. And they fly us to Belize, and then I get, like, in a boat to go to some, like, Gilligan's island resort and. And we start rolling tape and there's just no script or plan. I knew a concept, but what I loved was the producer at the time was a real heady guy. He was into the emotional, intelligent drama kind of that thing before we even called it that. And so here comes the cast, and he's just like, go have a conversation with them. And that was kind of the template. And so we went into those bonfires, the original bonfires were actually on the beach, and they were these kerosene lamps. By the end of it, we were like. We had soot from head to toe.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But we'd go in and there was no earpiece, there was no stage manager. They were down the beach. And I basically, we'd have a meeting beforehand, and he kind of tell me, and I'd say, look, you know, tell me a little bit about what you think they're going to share or what you wish they would share.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And I'll Go fishing for that. And if they don't say that, I'll get you something else on the boat that we can have for dinner.

[Host (Ad)]

Right, Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Basically, yeah. But it wasn't about. And I said, I'm gonna talk a lot, but you'll cut me out. And then you'll have content from them. They call it content, but my whole point was, let me facilitate them coming out of their shoes.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But there was never, like, a script. There was never a plan. And I would do it until I felt like I was done. And I'd walk down the beach and say, are we good? And they go, yeah, but go in and ask this. And I'm like, okay.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

So that's how it started.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And then, you know, we did a couple seasons, got canceled, did another season on Fox Reality Channel, which the whole network got canceled. And then I went to the Antiques Roadshow and other shows and did my thing. And then 18 years later, they're like, I read that they're bringing it back, but I'm like, they're not calling me. Yeah, you know, I'm. You know, I. I got gray hair now, and I got the call and went back to do it, and I did it the same way I used to do it. And PAs and producers coming up to me afterwards like, what. What was that? Like, where are your cards? And what. Who told you? I'm like, yo, this is how we used to get down.

[Host (Ad)]

Just vibes.

[Mark Wahlberg]

This is. Yeah, this is what we used to do.

[Host (Ad)]

Right?

[Mark Wahlberg]

And. And they're like, but you know my name. I'm like, bro, we had lunch together yesterday.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Remember when we. I like, like, Elwood's for you.

[Host (Ad)]

Like, seeing, like, just, like, the generational kind of mixture.

[Mark Wahlberg]

It was crazy because I. You know, when you look out of your eyes, like, my. I feel 25. So I had to kind of adjust the fact that when people are looking at me like, oh, I got it. I used to be like, uncle Vibe. Yeah, it used to be a Big Brother vibe. That was Uncle. Then it was dad. Now it's like, great Grandpa. I don't know what it is. I just realized that the bonfires. Now, when I say stuff, instead of them go, I hear you, Mark. They go, yes, sir. I'm like, oh, it's like that now. But all I know is that I showed up on set, I brought my wife. I knew what the show used to be, but I'm like, I'm just gonna do my thing and, you know, serve the show as best I can. Serve the People as best I can and see if it works. And so far so good.

[Host (Ad)]

So far so good. So Temptation island was one of the earliest reality TV dating shows even airing before the Bachel. How do you think that's influenced dating show landscape?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Well, I think the Bachelor was an answer to Temptation island. If what I've been told is true. I think what happened is Temptation island was the highest rated show in the history of FOX at the time. And then ABC was like, we need to get in the game.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Matter of fact, there was a story of saying the it doesn't matter.

[Host (Ad)]

Wait, now it does.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Well, there's a story that I got calls from people who were part of that first production team and they're in the office at ABC and they're like, you can't believe what happened today. I'm like, what? He says, we're at the table and the head of ABC is like going, let's talk about host. What I want is Mark Wahlberg. And they're like, I got his number right here. They said, no, you don't understand. He's on Fox. So I needed somebody like him.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I'm like, oh, so I missed that. Like, I could have had.

[Host (Ad)]

Wow. Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

So whatever.

[Host (Ad)]

Interesting.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But yeah, it was. The whole dating genre, you know, has evolved and dating has evolved and quite frankly, sexuality and relationships have evolved based on your generation and younger. And this is me giving flowers. Where I think flowers need to be is that there's so many people in my generation talk about younger generation as being like all on their phone, all about clout and all that stuff. And that's true to some degree. But there's also a redefinition of what being famous is by that, which is we're not famous by the mystery of the acting we did. We're famous by what we've told about our actual personal self. And that's what engages people. So, yeah, dating has changed, which makes these shows change. We, my generation and before shamed women for having any sexual thought at all. Right. Men can wild out. We're like, yeah, yeah, my man. Yeah, yeah. You just slept with your teacher in high school. Good for you.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But women show any sexuality and we shame them. So what I love is that your generation taught our generation, hey, that's not.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, relax.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And if you've watched me on tv, you kind of know where I'm at with that. So there's some positives. I think if the gray haired crowd that are supposed to be my age will listen to your crowd, we'd Be a little bit better off.

[Host (Ad)]

I love that clip. That make that. I love that because that's so true. There's such a generational divide where it's like, we can learn from everyone.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Well, now, that speaks to another thing.

[Host (Ad)]

Oh.

[Mark Wahlberg]

So I think that what we're seeing is that the Gen Z, Gen Alpha, that crowd, are hungry for advice from a different generation. The problem is my generation and older. Right. Usually dole out that advice with a good helping of judgment.

[Host (Ad)]

Yep.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Right. We like to.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And I'm not about that.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And so I think what resonates is that a perspective that's different than theirs is helpful if it doesn't feel like we're talking down on you or judging you for being stupid.

[Host (Ad)]

Right, Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Because you're not. You personally are not. But, I mean, in general, I may be hanging myself in this podcast.

[Host (Ad)]

No, you're killing it. You're literally doing so great. Speaking of. The audience loves all the relationship advice that you give to the couples. Where does all that wisdom come from?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Oh, man, Don't. Don't start.

[Host (Ad)]

It is.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Here's the thing. It was never my intention.

[Host (Ad)]

It's so good, though.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Thank you.

[Host (Ad)]

Like, you really, like, get to the core of, like, you'll. It's almost like you can read people's true hearts. Like, you can see it on their chest.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Here's the thing that I think people forget. It's not the words that people say that I'm listening to that we shouldn't and we don't listen to, actually, it's why we chose those words. It's what we are actually maybe hiding by the words we chose. And I don't know what, why, or how, or maybe it was. I. I have a theory that my whatever we call empathic ability isn't born out of some lofty thing. It's born out of survival and fear. Like, when I was growing up in the Deep south, as a guy who was an Alpha in his head but a beta in his body, I was not trying to throw down, you know, I mean, it was like I was not solving conflicts with this. You know what I'm saying? You weren't catching these hands I was going to catch. So what I developed, which I feel like there are a lot of people in society. Society who develop this, is that you're starting to listen to what's not said in the room out of safety. Like, where's the danger here? Like, he didn't say anything. But that guy in that corner of my eyes, that's the guy who's gonna kick my ass in the parking lot? So I kind of developed what I think is a deeper listening. And the other thing I try to tell people about those bonfires is I'm committed, man.

[Host (Ad)]

It's.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I've been on TV long enough that I'm not hung up about the fact that we're on tv, so I'm not thinking about that part. So all I'm thinking about is, how can I help? I'm like, where are you at? And unfortunately, I think I say too much. No, as a matter of fact, this season, I saw the cut, and I'm like, y' all need to cut.

[Host (Ad)]

No, you did. So I'm not trying to preach like that.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Thank you.

[Host (Ad)]

You did so good. Because it even. Like, I'm sitting on the. On the couch, and I'm watching with my husband Ollie, and we're just like. That is.

[Mark Wahlberg]

You mean my friend?

[Host (Ad)]

Your best friend. Ali. I want to call him. I want to call him later. Okay. But no, he loves you, by the way.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I love him. I loved your story. My wife and I fangirled, when we met you, we were like, oh, my God, no.

[Host (Ad)]

He's such a big fan. He showed me a picture, and he's like, this is my friend Mark.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And I was like, okay, that picture makes me laugh. I have the same picture, and I look like. Like a little souvenir toy he bought like, a tiny little thing. It's like I'm the bobblehead of me that he got.

[Host (Ad)]

No, no, no. He's a big man, but we love you. And we're listening to the. Some of the advice that you were giving the couples. And, like, we kind of paused and was like, well, how do you feel about that? Like, we then had the highest compliment. Our own little mini therapy session.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I get a lot of comments about that. I. And I thank you and thank you. But I think what makes the show work. Okay, it's not me, but I think what makes a show work is we tune in because we want mess and guilty pleasure. Like, take me there, which we usually give you.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But I think we also really. There's such a relatable aspect that even though these may be extreme experiences in relationship and a choice to go on a show that most people be like, that's crazy, right? Including me. I say that.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But even though we see extreme versions of conflict and issues, they relate to us. We all have fear. We all have, you know, feeling like we haven't been heard. We all have our own insecurities that show up even if the dial is 1 or 2 instead of 10 in every relationship. So I think when I hear people say it started a conversation, I'm.

[Host (Ad)]

That's good. It does. You've been married to your wife, Robbie, since 1987. Do you pull from your own relationships when you're speaking to the couples?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Oh, a little bit. It's called appropriation. She said it. She's done the work. She's read every philosopher.

[Host (Ad)]

Here you are.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And then I show up being like, not that dude. And then she's in the kitchen yelling at me, you need to read this. And I'm like, I don't need to read it. And I'm angry. And then I go on TV and go, you know, Ram Dass said. And I'm like, completely appropriating everything she's taught me. The fact is, we got married before we knew what that was. Yeah, I was right for my 25th birthday. And we grew each other up. You know, we grew each other up. We've made mistakes along the way. We've yelled and screamed and fought. And the one thing that we had that I think has served us is that we kind of had an understanding that we can get crazy and angry and whatever, and. But we're not. The opt is not on the table, that we're going to go our separate ways. So we gotta either work it out or be miserable. And I even said to her one day, I said, I'd much rather be miserable with you than be happy without you.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Which I know sounds like a bad country song. Maybe I should write.

[Host (Ad)]

You should.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Except I don't like country music.

[Host (Ad)]

But what music do you like?

[Mark Wahlberg]

I'm. You know, I'm like old school, kind of classic rockish. I like. I like a little hip hop. I like a little rap. What I really like is like 60s and 70s R B. Right. Like that stuff.

[Host (Ad)]

Okay.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Make out music.

[Host (Ad)]

Listen, Mark, now I see why you and Robbie's make it work. You know, Mark is making up.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Find your jam, right?

[Host (Ad)]

Find your thing.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Find your jam.

[Host (Ad)]

I love that dance.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Your dance.

[Host (Ad)]

I love that. I'm sorry. So back to how Robbie has made you the best human possible.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Well, it's. It's. Look, here's the deal. You're either in a conversation where you're asking questions and you're standing in. I don't. I don't know yet. Or you think you know.

[Host (Ad)]

Right?

[Mark Wahlberg]

And the. The hardest part in personal development is not people that have no emotional intelligence, is people who have no emotional intelligence but think they do.

[Host (Ad)]

Right, Right, Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Same thing. When I used to play basketball, I'm like, this. Several kinds of basketball players. There's a kind that's good. There's a kind like me that's bad and knows it, so finds what they can do. The worst ones are the ones who suck but think they're great.

[Host (Ad)]

Right, Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And they won't pass the ball, and they make mistakes and they blame you. Right. Sound like something we can apply to relationships. So I think what Robbie and I have always been is very clear that we don't have it figured out. And so we've been trying to figure it out.

[Host (Ad)]

I love that.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Still don't have it figured out. There's things I said on this show that I'm like, I don't know if I believe that that's the right thing to have said.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, interesting. I'm in year one of my marriage, and literally, like. Like, my marriage is so premature. It's so young. It's such a baby. And every time I, like, talk to married couples, it's like, we're still learning each other. We're still figuring it out. We're still. And I'm just like, I love that. Like, I love that. There's really no. Like, marriage truly is a journey. There's no. You're not going anywhere. You're not trying to get to any place. You're just trying to figure it out.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And arguably, if you really want to get cynical about it, like, why get married or have a relationship at all? And the answer to that isn't romantic for me.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

The answer is it's hard to make it through the world solo. You can. Props those of you who are doing it. You're not solo. You've got friends. You've got relationships. But. But, you know, marriage is like, you know, life is. Life can deal you some shit. And it's easier when you come back from the doctor and the doctor's like, we don't know. We got to run tests. It's easier to sit next to somebody and go, I'm here with you, than to sit alone by yourself. I said it a million times. If I wasn't married, I'd be dead. I would have just not eaten. You know, I don't know if hygiene would have happened. Like, I just. I'd. You find me just crusty on the couch.

[Host (Ad)]

Oh, my God.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Yeah.

[Host (Ad)]

Sounds like a lot of husbands that

[Mark Wahlberg]

I know saying was true.

[Host (Ad)]

Shout out to Robby. Shout out to the wise.

[Mark Wahlberg]

That's it.

[Host (Ad)]

Keeping these men alive, doing our best. So what has been the most shocking or emotional moment that you've witnessed as a host? Let's talk about the reality of the dreaded afternoon struggle. You know, the point in the day where your energy just decides to ghost you? Well, the new Starbucks Energy Refreshers are the plot twist you didn't know you needed. Now you can power the moments that matter most with the new Starbucks Energy Refreshers. Now ready for the real showstopper? If you like Starbucks Refreshers now, your favorite flavors come with an added boost of caffeine with the new Starbucks Energy Refreshers. Starbucks Energy Refreshers are an energizing way to stay on top of your day. I hate when I feel like I have to choose between something that tastes good and something that actually gives me energy. Why can't I have both? That's why I'm loving the Starbucks Strawberry Acai Energy Refresher. It's giving main character energy. Made with strawberry, passion fruit and acai flavors and served over ice with real freeze dried strawberry pieces, it's the ultimate afternoon pick me up. Let's be honest, reality TV can be a roller coaster, plot twist, wild arguments, emotional cliffhangers. Some days keeping up with it all feels like a full time job. But that's where Starbucks Energy Refresher comes in. It's my little energizing reset while I'm on set. A sip, a pause and I'm ready to deliver all the tea. Try the all new Energy Refreshers at Starbucks. Based on the best selling book series by Elle Kennedy comes off campus A story of love.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Last week you didn't even know her name. Sometimes people sneak up on you.

[Host (Ad)]

Friendship. This is the most absolutely unhinged planet and I'm obsessed with it and self discovery on and off the ice. It's scary telling the world something I'm not ready for it to know. Oh, and it's pretty steamy.

[Mark Wahlberg]

This is the part where I tell you all the things I want to do to you off campus is now streaming on Prime Video.

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[Mark Wahlberg]

compare the moments that much. And I also, I will tell you that when I'm doing the bonfires and we finish them, I can't really remember what happened. I have to go to Robbie and say, what did I say and what was bad?

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And I. Three in the morning, I'm like, I can't believe I said that. I get emotional and I have gotten emotional on camera. When somebody says something that lets me know how they feel about themselves. That's not like I remember last season, what Taylor was saying. Everybody leaves me. It's just a fact. If I, if I were with me, I would leave me too. That just cracked me open. And as much as Mikey is getting just memed out because he even sobbing, he crushed me. We can make a judgment about him if you want and people do, but look, everybody's trauma, everybody's emotion, everybody's process is their own.

[Host (Ad)]

Right?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Right. And what I was just trying to encourage him to do is you don't have to front with me. You know that the phrase I hate the most that I use all the time is it's all good.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Now, there is a spiritual concept to that phrase that I dig that whatever happens to you happens for you. It's all good. But when we say it is all good as a deflection to the fact that it ain't so fun. Good.

[Host (Ad)]

Right, right, right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

That's where I was kind of pushing back to him. So, you know, Mikey broke my heart a little bit. Cole broke my heart a little bit.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

You know, Cole, I really like Cole. You know, there was a podcast I did and it came out and he clipped it. Reality Steve clipped it. It sounds like I'm Kind of ragging on him. But I. I'm gonna just say I think Cole's a terrific guy with great character. I just think that he hasn't had the journey of asking those deeper questions. And if I had to do it over again, I might have loved up on him a little bit more. Yeah. You know, that's the worst part about my job is now I watch it, and I have to second guess everything I said.

[Host (Ad)]

But I just feel like you create such a safe space. And I feel like reality TV hosts are really kind of in a position where you're saying the lines and then you're. You know, you send them on their way, but you create this whole thing for, like, men to break down crying.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Let me speak to that a second.

[Host (Ad)]

Yes.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Because there's a lot of comparison. Robbie's phrase compare and despair. If you compare, you're gonna despair.

[Host (Ad)]

I love that.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Love that. All of her phrases rhyme and are a bad bumper sticker, and I hate it. But they're great. So comparing what I'm doing on my show to what others are doing and saying one's better or one's worse. The jobs are different.

[Host (Ad)]

The jobs are different.

[Mark Wahlberg]

What's being asked of the hosts on other shows is not these kind of conversations. It's traffic, copying and rules and regulation stuff. And it's. And even on my show, that part of it is often scripted. I kind of put it in my own words. But when I say, you've come the island and we're going to separate, that's just stuff that's got to be said.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Quite frankly, in my opinion, as a producer, if I were producing, the more you could do a voiceover without having to have a host at all, I'd cut the position.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

You know, but to compare what I'm doing to what other people doing and say one's better or worse, that's not how I feel. These are my peers. They're doing their job, which fits their show, and killing it. Right. My show. For some reason, the bonfires have become part of the content. So rarely on reality shows is the host participation part of the actual content of the show. I'm grateful for that. It wasn't what I planned, and I've been asked to lean in over the years, and I can't help myself anyway. But that's just to say that, you know, if I were doing one of those other shows, I'd probably be saying the script the way they're saying the script.

[Host (Ad)]

And so you wouldn't put a little Mark in it. I don't believe that. Yeah. Okay, I'm going to say there's going to be some mark in there that you're not going to just read the paper.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Yeah, they're gonna have to just edit.

[Host (Ad)]

Okay, let's get into the current season of Temptation again. This season had four very different couples dealing with trust issues, cheating, commitment problems. Why do you think people agree to test their relationships in such an intense environment?

[Mark Wahlberg]

I mean, I can give you the answer, but I. I'll just be real.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, no PR answer.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Yeah, I don't. I don't do that well, anyway, look, I think part of it is altruistic. I think they truly are at a crossroads and aren't sure what they want to do and want to come on to this, you know, experience in hopes for getting some clarity and truth. I think the other thing is that they get to be on tv, which is going to further some dreams and goals and career stuff that, you know, obviously we know that math, you know, it's. It's clout. And I say to them, I don't have a problem with any of that. It's not, it's not one or the other. You're not fronting to me. You're just coming here. And so what I say to them at the beginning of the season, before it even rolls, and I've said it on a bunch of podcasts, so if you've heard it before, just fast forward this part. But I say, like, why are you here? And they give you an answer. And I said, well, let me tell you why I think you're here. I think you're here because you have issues. You want to talk about it. But I also think you kind of want some clout and some brand deals. And the route to both of them are the same. Authenticity. You be real, you're going to find answers in your relationship. You be real, people are going to follow you and put you on Royal Caribbean on your vacation for free. Which, by the way, no love for the host. Zero. I'm paying a retail for my shit.

[Host (Ad)]

We need to get Mark brand deals. Who do we need to talk to?

[Mark Wahlberg]

This is me literally begging. Nah, I'm good.

[Host (Ad)]

Shout out to Goldie, though.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Goldie, my daughter's.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah. Going crazy on social media.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I know she's killing it at my expense, but she's killing it. So, yeah, that's. That's the thing, I think. And then there's another aspect I've thought about that I've seen on other shows too, and I Think it's real. I think for some people, a lot of people, it is far scarier to have an intimate conversation with their significant other in a therapist's office or around their own coffee table.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Kitchen table. Than it is to do it in front of millions of people on tv because at least they have the app that the show made them.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Right. So I feel like sometimes we go on a show like this because I've done some other crazy ass shows. We go on shows like these and one, we underestimate how real they become. We think we can manage it. Right. And I get it.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And the other is it puts us in a situation where we're forced to do stuff we don't have the courage to do. Right, right. And so. And that's not a judgment. I just think that might be a subconscious reason why people, yeah. At least tell themselves why this is going to be okay. And I always tell them on my show, I'm like, look, I get it. And. But I will say to you that if you try to manage who you're going to be like, you think you're going to be able to edit this in the way that you do it

[Host (Ad)]

out, produce the producers?

[Mark Wahlberg]

You can't. And what's going to happen is that's going to end up making you hate the way it's cut. But if you just be who you're gonna be. If you're a villain, be a villain. If you're not, you wanna cry, cry, do your thing. And I believe audiences will embrace you one way or the other. Far more for that than to be less than forthright.

[Host (Ad)]

Do you feel this shift from when you first started with reality tv and there's no social media and no one cares if you have followers and no one cares till today where it's like a lot of people are doing it for clout. Well, do you see that difference?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Well, the difference is kind of interesting. When we first did Temptation island back in the day, right after World War II, when the troops were coming home, when you were on a reality show, it was basically like an understood, you're not going to be an actor. You're not. You're a reality automatic.

[Host (Ad)]

Like C list, D list automatically.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I remember going to some industry function that Anderson Cooper, a young Anderson Cooper, was moderating and he referred to reality show people as sublebrities.

[Host (Ad)]

Oh, wow.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And I'm like, oh, I hear you being all clever, but. But what has changed is, and I like it, is that everybody now has access to media. Now you may not get access to a whole audience, but you can put it out there. Right. And so everybody's a content creator. And I think it's a good thing.

[Host (Ad)]

I love it.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Yeah.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah. I love that you're so in tune with what's happening around you.

[Mark Wahlberg]

That's a good comment.

[Host (Ad)]

No, you really are. You're pretty clued in. I love that. Okay.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I might be desperate and needy of approval. I don't know. What? You don't?

[Host (Ad)]

No, I don't. Like, it feels so natural. Like, it feels like you have evolved with the times, and it would be kind of hard to even be on now, season two of Netflix's Temptation Islands if you did not evolve.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Well, it's not the same vibe.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah. And so you wouldn't be able to keep up.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And even in the few years we've been doing it in the reboot, because we were on USA for a while. Generationally things. The language changes every season. The slang, the jargon. I can't be throwing the slang out because I become that dude, and my daughter's the first to let me know.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But. But I need. If I want to be relevant, and I do. If I want to serve this program, and quite frankly, not to get too lofty, if I just want to serve.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Period. Be of service, then it's on me to open my mind and know I don't know everything. To learn the language of those. Here's the thing about communication and relationship. Let's go there, break it down. We need to listen harder than we speak. And in the listening, we then get the language that can be heard. Like, I could preach all day long, but if you can't hear, what I'm saying is, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah. So I have to. I have to listen to what. How people are communicating so that I can communicate in a way that can be heard by somebody who might be generationally different than me. Right. And I'm willing to realize that whatever I think is supposed to be our language may not apply today. So I'm a student more than the teacher so that I can. If I'm going to be effective and be of service to you, I got to be able to be willing to learn your language, not to force you to listen to my language, which in relationship, I've said before on the show. Golly, I've said, you know, look, I know what you're saying is coming from a place of love, but it's not being received as love. And that's what I'm talking about. It's not what you're saying. It's not what your point of view is. It's. Is it being received in the way that you meant it, in a loving way?

[Host (Ad)]

There's a disconnect. Right?

[Mark Wahlberg]

So I'm trying to listen to y' all and learn.

[Host (Ad)]

You're doing great, Mark. Thank you. Truly.

[Mark Wahlberg]

There are phrases I think of all the time that I'm not allowed to say.

[Host (Ad)]

Tell me one.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Slay. I can't say slay. I think it all the time.

[Host (Ad)]

Slay is good.

[Mark Wahlberg]

It's good, but it doesn't feel right with me.

[Host (Ad)]

Try it one time.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Oh, no, I will not.

[Host (Ad)]

At, like, a dinner.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Oh, I have. And my daughter's like, please. And as a joke, I use fleek for about three years. Oh, fleek is so done. It's chuki. But nonetheless, again, I'm like, about two years throwing them out where it is. So I'm. I'm sort of like, if you roll back, this is the phrase.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And I don't. I don't try to roll that into the show anymore.

[Host (Ad)]

But slay. Well, you do slay. As a host.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Me slaying is a state of being. Me saying it is appropriating words I shouldn't be saying.

[Host (Ad)]

I'm gonna be tuning into the next season, and I'll be like, mark, give me one.

[Mark Wahlberg]

There won't be after this podcast.

[Host (Ad)]

No, there won't be. It'll be like little Easter eggs, and you just randomly twist.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I'll just wink at you.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like, that was a slang he tried.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I'll look at you and go, fuck it.

[Host (Ad)]

Fuck it.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And then everybody who knows me will cringe. But you and I will have a thing.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, we'll have a thing. Okay, back to the season.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Oh, boy.

[Host (Ad)]

Do you think Temptation island reveals the truth or creates problems that weren't there before?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Probably, yeah. It's not my intention. Maybe I'm trying to give you a real answer on this instead of being cute more realistically from my seat, is that I think that people come to the island thinking these are our problems. And what they discover after a little bit of introspection and more importantly, the clarity that comes from being a me, not an us, for a minute, you realize that those things you thought were the problem, that's not really the root of them.

[Host (Ad)]

Right?

[Mark Wahlberg]

So. And I think I said on the show, I think your problem may not be fidelity. It may be something else. And the other thing I say pretty regularly is pretty, you know, one on one in this Conversation is, most people come to the islands with their fingers pointed this way. What's your problem? Well, he doesn't do, or she doesn't do, or I need and he doesn't. Whatever that stuff. And the thing that I've learned from Robby, and I've been saying for years, is, look, all that's good and well, and it may be truthful even, but you can't control that, especially physically. Now he's in that villa, you're in this villa. You can't. There's nothing you're going to do.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

So either you work on you or you don't do anything. And the truth is, in real life, that's the same. I can't change you. If we're in a relationship, I can't change you. But what I might do is stand in my worth and be a way that you then start to mirror, and that creates change. But I can't. The. Where I get really spun out is when people do the mandate, ultimatum kind of vibe. Not to show the ultimatum. Love it. But the mandate of, like, if they don't ask me to marry me, by this day, it's over.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Well, then do you want that proposal?

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

You want the.

[Host (Ad)]

That, do you know, hush one? Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Hi. You got this producers over here that I'm feeling because I'm codependent. No, but for real, you know, you don't want that proposal. It's empty. So that ultimatum, that mandate, that pointing your finger at someone else, he makes me feel, blah, blah, blah. That's true. But there's another level, which is nobody can make you feel anything.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

You get to either accept or say thanks for sharing.

[Host (Ad)]

Right, Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And it's really easy for me to say because, you know, somebody says something, I read one bad comment, and I'm done for the day. So, you know, I'm. I'm trying to figure it out too.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But, yeah, I think the, The. The thing that people don't understand coming on the show is that you think it's about this, but when you get there, it's about you.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah. And then a lot of the times due to you, they end up leaving, like, seeing their worth or seeing a part of something that they didn't know.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Okay, well, let's. Let's talk about that do to you thing.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

All right. And I'm not trying to be.

[Host (Ad)]

I do a lot of props.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Mark, you're showering me with flowers and I'm coming.

[Host (Ad)]

I've never seen that kind of, like, interaction between, like, host and contestant. And like, in the dating atmosphere of these shows, I've never seen that.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I think what's happened is the shows have kind of given you a template of what the hosts are supposed to be. And so as viewers, we're used to watching that, and we're kind of like, whether it's phoned in or not, we're like, whatever. That's what host do. Yeah. And I'm doing it different because I'm not from a different school.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But the point is, I didn't do anything. The things I'm saying to people there are usually reflecting their words back to them. And so I'm hearing you say something, which makes me say something to that. Now you didn't hear you say it. And that's the big thing. We don't hear what we're actually saying.

[Host (Ad)]

Got it.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And so I will say stuff like in the last season with Grant, you know, your words say one thing, but your actions are different. Or like I said, Nicole, how do you explain the distance between your perception of how your relationship is going and what Scarlet's saying? So let's explore that. So not to deflect. And thank you for the props. I appreciate it. It's all good, but. It's all good. But the truth is, I only say things based on what they said, and then they have to still do the work. And there are people come to the show and haven't changed one lick, and there are people who come to the show and they're a different person by the end of it. I don't think this show is anything more than entertainment. I don't think I'm a therapist. I'm just a game show host. Right. That said, the number of people who've been on the show and then the next thing I'm seeing on their Instagram is that they found a forever love and they're getting married and having kids and inviting me to weddings and stuff is uncanny to me. So let's just chalk it up that every time we go to bat in relationship, we. Some things are great when we crash and burn in some other areas, but we are more informed on the next one. Yeah, right. And that redefining what I love you means, you know, Temptation island kind of explores that, even though it's not scientific, nor is it even advised. Y', all, you know, call your clergy. You know what I mean?

[Host (Ad)]

So what are your overall thoughts of this season?

[Mark Wahlberg]

I like the fact that the boys are in their feelings.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I think that's healthy for us. All to witness. Yep, bottomless apps for $9.99 are back at Buffalo Wild Wings. And I need everyone to know. That's why I stole this megaphone from a coach to tell people. Attention team. There are bottomless mozzarella sticks and fried pickles to eat at BDubs. Hey guy carrying equipment by himself. Go make friends and share some bottomless apps with them. And you fans watching sports is better with bottomless hatch queso. So go get bottomless apps for $9.99 at Buffalo Wild Wings now. And don't make me repeat myself. Limited time. See Weber app for details. Your outdoor space is where you unwind and make memories. So make it count. Belgard pavers are designed to elevate your outdoors. Designed forward and built to last. Learn [e-mail] that's B E L G-A-R-D.com I don't miss Crazy Shower. You know, three and four and five sums. Yeah, you know, I, I get that the messy sexy stuff is, is watchable. It makes me cringe out. I hate it. But, but, but people dig it and I get it. But I kind of like this is far more, a little bit more of an emotional journey. And it's hard for me to quantify because each season is different for me and the people. I make a choice that the four couples that come on the island, I'm committed to them. Whether I like them on the day one or not, I commit to. I love them. I know that sounds ridiculous, but I have to make this commitment. If I'm not buying what I'm selling, it's going to be terrible.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And so for me, it's hard to weigh one season over the other because to me, my experience is the bonfires for the most part and getting to know these individuals as best I can. I don't have a whole lot of access with them anyway.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

So, you know, I have to wait until it airs and hear what viewers say.

[Host (Ad)]

Are you involved in the casting process?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Not even one bit.

[Host (Ad)]

Really?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Not even one bit Interesting. It. I think people will be surprised how little I'm involved or even know. So I show up to the island. I haven't seen a picture. I don't know their names. I don't know anything. Maybe a couple days before we start shooting, I might get a. I get a like sheet from producers that has their picture in the bio and like a little bit of background and I read it and I learn their names and stuff like that. But you know, for whatever it's Worth, for whatever reason, my process, I don't feel the need. And maybe I'd be better if I did. I'm going to be open to that. But I don't really feel the need to do a deep dive and do research and homework. I want to meet them where they are, and then we'll go from there. And that's been working. Okay. I wonder if I need to work harder to learn more. But then when the show's going on, I try to stay out of it altogether because when I show up, things we joke that I'm the vibe killer.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Like, everybody's like, yeah. So I stay out of it. I'm not really keeping up on their stories other than what producers put out in their hot sheet every day.

[Host (Ad)]

Okay.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I'll read that to kind of know what's up. And as far as the bonfires go, I've got the safety that I have an earpiece. If I miss something, the producer is going to fill me in. I'm not trying to say it's all me. Occasionally I might space out and they're like, get back on track. But I kind of choose and some and I'll be straight. Sometimes I know what I might see. Like, oh, my God, you're not gonna believe what happened. But I do my very best not to watch those clips beforehand so that I can say in honesty to them, we'll watch it together.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Right. But I don't really feel like I need to know so much to be with you right now in the present.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I don't need to have to formulate a line of questioning and thought for them.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Because I honestly got it. I'm following. I'm not leading this. I'm following. You watch the clip. I say, what did you see? And the reason I say this, I watch a clip. I see one thing. You watch a clip, you spin out. He says, I'm gonna shoot my shot. I'm like, that means he's gonna ask out on a date. You say, we're done.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And I'm like, I gotta go with you. Right, right, right.

[Host (Ad)]

So, yeah, let's talk Mikey and Sydney.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Let's talk Mikey and Sydney.

[Host (Ad)]

What do you. What. First of all, what are your overall thoughts on their relationship in general?

[Mark Wahlberg]

First of all, let me be clear that when they come on the island, everybody comes on the island. They're four couples. I say, I'm committed to you leaving the island in a better place. But be clear, I'm committed to eight people leaving the island in a Better place. I'm not committed to four couples if you are. I am, but I don't need to be.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, I love that.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Right. So Mikey and Sydney, what you didn't see on the show is that Sydney dropped truth bombs at the bonfire to the other girls, to the point where I said, you may need to come sit here.

[Host (Ad)]

Oh, wow. Yes, girl.

[Mark Wahlberg]

She's that girl.

[Host (Ad)]

Oh, wow.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And Mikey, with all. All the smoke he's getting right now. Did I use that correctly?

[Host (Ad)]

You did.

[Mark Wahlberg]

With all he's getting. I could relate to him.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

We have similar traits in that the people pleasing aspect that makes him a good live event host that apparently he's very good at is also the thing that keeps him from accessing how he's really feeling. So I got a little cringy on my own part when I saw the bonfire and I was coming at him pretty hard. It's an edit, so you don't know that there was some kind stuff before that. But my point was, look, you don't have to front now. And it's not serving you.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

It's not serving you. Tears, I'm cool with. People can. Can, you know, drag you for that all they want. But the fact is it's not all good all the time. And your feelings have merit. They're substantive. They are true for you. And the difference between you, when you're not being that guy, that's the part that we're going to fall in love with. Like the real version of you, the vulnerable version of you. Not the weak, weepy all the time, but not trying to make me okay.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, right, Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And I'd say to that, to me, I'm the guy. If I make everybody feel great. I totally get that. I'm that guy a lot too.

[Host (Ad)]

But this is.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But how do you feel?

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Not so great.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

So let's. Let's get there. So that was. That was my take on Mikey. I told Mikey last week, if he's moving to la, he wants to live in my house for a minute. He's got a place. But I say that to everybody on the show because I honestly got to have trouble letting go. And as Sidney, I have a lot of respect for. Yeah, I called her out. I would say to her face with my chest, that were you looking for an excuse? Because what he did in that first bonfire, I get it, that was painful. But that was enough for you to say, we're done. Which made me. And I even said to her, do you think you were looking for a reason to get out of this. And there was no shame in that. And quite honestly, I mean, I'm a straight man, but Xavier could turn me that guy. Am I wrong?

[Host (Ad)]

I mean, he put it on thick, too. He came in hot.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But I all hot and sexy, and I'm a track star and a guitar, and I don't want to get lost in the sauce. I'm going to go as slowly as you need to. I'm like, hold me. You know what I mean? So I love that love story. Yeah.

[Host (Ad)]

That was a beautiful, beautiful story. What was the point where you kind of realized there would be no, like, reconciliation with Mikey and Sydney?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Well, there's a point where he says to me, I don't remember what's in the cut or what's out, but things are coming back to me now. Where he looked at me, says, mark, do you think there's any hope for us? And I'm like, well, there's always hope, Mike. Yeah, but it was pretty clear that she. I mean, she was saying, I love you, and they were dating.

[Host (Ad)]

She was gone.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But like I said to him, and I'll say to you, and I've said to everybody, look, I get it. Yeah. Is she gonna leave the island with you? Maybe not. She can leave with Xavier. Maybe so. But the show ends. Life doesn't end.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

These relationships don't end. You know how many of these couples I don't even know? I haven't seen a reunion because I didn't host it,

[Host (Ad)]

Clock it, hate that I did that.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I don't know the outcome.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I could venture guesses because it's tv, but it doesn't matter. Relationship and life is fluid.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

You find each other again. That's what I'm saying. You. There's two things. You may never get back together, or what you've learned here is going to make your next relationship stronger, or y' all might find each other again at a different time.

[Host (Ad)]

Right, Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Because that's just how things go. So it's not a linear thing, which is one of the things I don't like about the show is at the end, we have to make a choice. You want to stay together, go with somebody else, or go. That's all cute for the moment, but as soon as you walk out the door, you can do whatever you want.

[Host (Ad)]

Right. I didn't realize how many of the couples were, like, living together. And they're like, we have a dog. We have dogs. And you met my family, you know, my mom. Like, there are real lives before.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Well, that's the part that troubles me.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Is that. And it troubles me for a couple reasons, and I find this a lot in life is that sometimes you'll see people in a bad marriage or a bad situation, and the complications of separation keep you living misery.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, Right. Because who's going to take the dog? Me. Every time.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Yeah.

[Host (Ad)]

By the way.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Yeah, send them to me. I'll take the dog. That's why I told my kids. They're like, we're not sure we want to have kids yet. I'm like, hey, this is not your choice. You have kids and you. You do the first six months, and then I'm gonna raise them.

[Host (Ad)]

Six months? I don't know what you think for six months.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Yeah.

[Host (Ad)]

Tear me up.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I know, right? I know.

[Host (Ad)]

Mark, do you keep in touch with any of the contestants from this season or any previous seasons?

[Mark Wahlberg]

That's a running joke in my house is that I follow everybody on all their socials. And I do keep you certain a lot of the singles will reach out to me.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And, you know, give me props on something I post or tell me something they're doing. Would you. Would you repost this for me? And that kind of stuff. And the couples hold a deeper place in my heart, and I keep up with them and try not to, you know, I'm here. They know I'm here if they ever want to talk to me. But I will do stuff like if somebody posts some ambiguous post that they're in their feelings or something went bad, I'm like, you okay? And they're like, who are you again? So, yeah, I. Look, I tell them on the island. It's true for me. I know people think this is probably bullshit, but I'm making a commitment on this that we're going to have real talk. You're going to. You're going to give me the grace and the honor of sharing this with me. And that's not going to stop when we stop rolling tape. I'm not using this to serve me a little bit. A lot of bit. But that's not my purpose.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And it would be disingenuous if I'm like, yeah, we were really into the bonfire. And then day two, after the bonfire, I'm like, I'm sorry. Don't call me.

[Host (Ad)]

Right, right, right, right, right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

So they are real people to me. They always are. That's how I can access these conversations, that in the circus, which is a TV show, they're real to me, and I have a place in my heart for them. And really get excited when I see their lives grow beyond this. And a lot of them have gotten engaged and married this year from other shows. And I'm just. I got invited to one, I got asked to officiate another. I wasn't able to go to either one, but. But those things I'm glad to keep up with.

[Host (Ad)]

That's beautiful. I love that. Okay. Mark.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Yes.

[Host (Ad)]

Since you're known for giving great relationship advice, I thought it would be fun to have some of my listeners writing questions for us to answer together. What do you think?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Sure. Show. I'm in. I will just say that whatever advice I give you is worth exactly what you're paying for it. Zero. Because I am not a trained professional, dude, who's been on the planet longer than you.

[Host (Ad)]

Well, you know what, dude that's been on the planet. Brittany P. Has a question.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Let's go.

[Host (Ad)]

Brittany P. She says, so I'm married, right? My husband is very caring, loving, godly man that wants to help everyone and everything around us. I'm feeling like I'm the bad guy for trying to stop him, even though I know I'm trying to stop him because we're trying to save, to get our own home. Am I being mean or logical?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Well, the answer is you can be both.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And quite honestly, in a marriage, we need to be each other's checks and balances. But, but this goes back to what I was saying earlier, Brittany, if your well intended movements and choices aren't being received as love and support, then check yourself a little bit is what I'd say. I think encouraging your partner to be wiser with their money to buy a house and remind them of the goals that we have to share. I wish Robbie and I had done that for each other instead of going, no, let's go on a trip. It'll be fun, right? So I think that's really great. If it's, if, if it's stifling his generosity and charity and spirit and comes from a place of judgment and resentment, then it's not even that it's going to upset him. It's going to derail your goal.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Because when I use this example a lot, I use it on the show, but they cut it when in dog training, when you have a dog, right, if you hold the leash tight, the dog pulls. If you give the leash slack, the dog chills. So maybe the conversation, Brittany, Brittany, is have a conversation with your guy to say, hey, what is our goal? Are we sharing the same goal? And is there a balance where we can Be what God wants us to be. We can take care of our community and be charitable and all that stuff and. But also put ourselves on that same table. So I think that's probably the way I would have that conversation. Brittany, I don't think you're being mean. I think you are being responsible. Just, again, if it's not being received in the way you mean it, find language they can hear. Not language. You prefer slay.

[Host (Ad)]

So good. That was so good.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Thank you.

[Host (Ad)]

I can't believe this just rolls off the tongue like that.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I don't know.

[Host (Ad)]

This question is from Mariama. This may sound stupid and a long shot, but I'm a single mom. The man I had a child with is my ex. And we had planned to be married at one point. He wants to get back together, but still doesn't tell me the truth about his personal life and who he talks to and when girls flirt with him, etc. But he expects me to give him every level of loyalty. What do I do?

[Mark Wahlberg]

Reevaluate. What is it you really want? I get on paper that as a single mom, to have the father back in the life in a. What my generation has said is a traditional way probably feels like closing that file. Right. But if the relationship that had you not stay together hasn't changed, then that's what you really need to address before you think about if you're going to be a relationship again. So, again, it's not your responsibility to do this. But if this is what you want, then maybe you can be the first to be vulnerable, to find language to say to him. You can tell me, let's be transparent with each other. And I'm going to work to not judge that. But not being transparent, when you withhold information from me, which he may be doing, to spare her feelings and manage her feelings, she can communicate. That doesn't make me feel safe. It makes me feel less safe. I really would like to explore us being together. So can we get it on the table? I'm gonna let you off the hook, and then you can let me off the hook. And then maybe we. We can. Our relationship can transcend.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

The other side of that is, if that's not gonna happen, you can't get back together when you're gonna have that feeling every morning. Right, Right.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And that's okay, too.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Right. I think as women, we girls, I think often the drumbeat of what society has told us we're supposed to have by this certain time has us acquiesce in relationship. I've said this before. It's the C's get degrees concept. He's pretty. Pretty great. There's this part, but he's pretty great. And then I have somebody to go to that. My friend's wedding with. Right?

[Host (Ad)]

Yep.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And I'm constantly an advocate for women to say, you know what? You don't need a man. You get to have a man if you want a man.

[Host (Ad)]

That part.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Or a partner.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

It doesn't have to be a man.

[Host (Ad)]

Right.

[Mark Wahlberg]

And. And that's what I'm kind of would say to my daughter. I said to other people, I'm like, look, be the buyer, not the seller. Look, I'm good.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

If you can enhance my good.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Come on.

[Host (Ad)]

Come on, man.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But if you're going to take away some of my sunshine, find somebody else.

[Host (Ad)]

Got to go. Right? That's so good. Be the buyer, not the seller.

[Mark Wahlberg]

That's it.

[Host (Ad)]

Find that in my bio. Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Meanwhile, I'm selling all the time. I'm just. Just love me. Just please love me. I mean, I'm trying to work it out.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah. Mark, so before we go. Yes. What is next for you?

[Mark Wahlberg]

I don't know. I was thinking lunch. Here's what's next for me.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Want to get my podcast going at a level that I, you know, I talk about, if you don't know your worth, then people don't do it. So I've been doing a podcast for a while, but I'm not happy with how I've invested in it. So I'm kind of committing to following what has been asked of me to continue these kind of conversations in a podcast form. So that's. We're in the works to try to make that happen. What I kind of envision is where lots of podcasts will do recaps and T. Right. And I love both. I'd like to really have people on the show and talk about what that experience was from an emotional intelligence standpoint. Like, there are people that were on Love is Blind this last season. I need to talk to those boys.

[Host (Ad)]

Call them up.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I need to talk to them.

[Host (Ad)]

I know who one of your first guests can be after the revamp. Who? Ollie, my husband.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I'd love to talk to Ollie. I think he could teach me some stuff.

[Host (Ad)]

He would love every second of that.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Booked. Booked. I'd be thrilled with that.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah.

[Mark Wahlberg]

So that's what I'm working on. That. I. I've been talking about it for a long time, but I haven't put my feet firm on the ground about writing A book. People are kind of saying that, but I don't know if I'm ever gonna do that. I think right now I'm gonna just, you know, I don't know.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, I'm.

[Mark Wahlberg]

What I. What I'll say is when I'm at a loss for what to do next, the answer is not to make a list of what to do. The answer is to be open to what I'm supposed to be doing and wait for that sign. Yeah, I'm not a real religious guy, but, you know, I'm a spiritual guy. I do believe in a higher power. I use that phrase. You know what phrase I use so that people don't get twisted? I call it the vibe.

[Host (Ad)]

The Vibe.

[Mark Wahlberg]

The Vibe. God's a little heavy for some people. And so what I try to work on in my life is to be aware of where I'm being led, where I'm being called and am I being of service or I'm being self serving. And so that's why I rarely have a plan for what's next.

[Host (Ad)]

So good. Yeah, Yeah, I feel that.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Also why I'm still living in the Valley, so.

[Host (Ad)]

I love the Valley.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I love the Valley. I just.

[Host (Ad)]

You know, where you want to go?

[Mark Wahlberg]

I don't know, just somewhere, you know, where I don't have to rebuild the laundry room, that's all.

[Host (Ad)]

Well, whatever that looks like for you. I don't know, whatever that looks like.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I think I should take my own advice. And if I want a different reality, I need to redefine it. I have to define it and then I can have it.

[Host (Ad)]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I know it's gonna be beautiful for you because you have such a beautiful aura and such a great energy. From the moment you walked in here, I just like. I felt my guard go down and I just feel like your warm energy, and I really, really appreciate it.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Could be a mirror. Could be you giving it to me.

[Host (Ad)]

Oh, thank you. I really appreciate it.

[Mark Wahlberg]

I'm a fan of yours. I loved the love story of you and Ollie, and I love that it's continuing and. And I'm gonna have him on the podcast.

[Host (Ad)]

100%. Yeah. Yeah, that'd be so good.

[Mark Wahlberg]

But I'm gonna sit on a higher chair.

[Host (Ad)]

Just lower his a little bit. Have his knees up by his chest.

[Mark Wahlberg]

Hey, thanks. Thanks for having me on. I appreciate it.

[Host (Ad)]

Thank you. And thank you guys for tuning into another episode of what's the Reality? Be sure to follow us on all social platforms at what's the Reality Pod. And I will see you next Wednesday. Bye, guys. What's the reality? What's the reality. With Plan B? Emergency contraception? We're in control of our future. It's backup birth control you take after unprotected sex that helps prevent pregnancy before it starts. It works by temporarily delaying ovulation and it won't impact your future fertility. Plan B is available in all 50 US states at all major retailers near you with no ID, prescription or age requirement needed. Together we got this. Follow Plan B on Insta app. Plan B One step to learn more Use as directed in the US there's

[Mark Wahlberg]

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[Host (Ad)]

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[Mark Wahlberg]

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