What's the Reality? Episode Summary
Episode: Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Release Date: March 26, 2025
Host: AD from Love is Blind
Introduction
In this action-packed episode of What's the Reality?, host AD welcomes two notable reality TV stars: Ben from Love is Blind season eight and Hashim from The Ultimatum season three. Joining them is Zaina, the host from Love is Blind, who also serves as the matchmaker for the evening. The trio delves into their reality show experiences, personal growth journeys, current pop culture events, and offers insightful advice on love and relationships.
Guest Introductions
Zaina kicks off the episode with enthusiasm, introducing Hashim from The Ultimatum and Ben from Love is Blind, highlighting their show's impact on their personal lives and relationships.
Hashim's Journey on The Ultimatum
Hashim details his participation in The Ultimatum, explaining the premise: "The Ultimatum is a crazy experiment where there's six couples, and one person issues their partner an ultimatum: get married or break up." (01:22) He shares his motivations, stating, "I was the person that issued my boyfriend an ultimatum after three years together to prioritize our relationship." (02:03)
Hashim reflects on the aftermath, revealing that his relationship ended with his ex-partner blocking him on social media: "He blocked me after the reunion, which was shocking." (04:30). This experience became a catalyst for his personal growth, leading him to freeze his eggs at 33 to take control of his future: "I froze my eggs because I didn’t want to settle for convenience." (04:55)
He also discusses his wellness journey, which included battling depression and prioritizing his health: "Fitness and wellness saved me." (06:41). Hashim emphasizes the importance of healing holistically, creating a guided journal titled Purposeful Healing to assist others: "My journal covers the five stages of grief with prompts for mind, body, and soul." (08:15)
Hashim offers heartfelt advice: "Stop romanticizing red flags. It's not cute." (09:05) He encourages seeking therapy and embracing the healing process without rushing: "It's okay to cry, but don’t fall into a sunken place." (09:05)
Ben's Experience on Love is Blind
Ben shares his journey to Love is Blind, highlighting his quick decision to join the show: "I received a DM inviting me to Temptation Island and accepted within two weeks." (17:04). With a background in sociology from Princeton and a master's in Instructional Technology, Ben was running a tech startup before his reality TV debut.
Reflecting on his time on the show, Ben describes the camaraderie among the male cast members: "We made the girls feel comfortable. We were like the therapists of the show." (20:16). He discusses his relationship with Shantae and Brian, noting their respectful interactions and challenges: "Shantae was closed off initially but did what was best for herself at the end." (21:00)
Ben candidly shares his experience of being blocked by Shantae before the show aired: "Shantae blocked me a few days before it aired. It was shocking because we didn’t communicate." (39:04). Despite this, Ben remains positive, expressing happiness for their mutual growth: "As long as she's happy, I'm good." (40:58)
Current Events and Pop Culture Discussions
Kim Kardashian and Kanye West Custody Battle
Zaina brings up the ongoing custody disputes between Kim Kardashian and Kanye West, particularly Kanye's controversial music release featuring their daughter: "Kim is considering stripping Kanye of joint legal custody because of his new track." (11:57). Hashim weighs in, emphasizing child welfare over ego: "They should both say, what is best for these kids, not ego." (12:30).
Wendy Williams' Guardianship Struggle
The conversation shifts to Wendy Williams and her battle to regain control from her guardianship: "Wendy feels like she's living in a prison and is fighting for her freedom." (13:56). Both Zaina and Hashim express empathy, discussing Wendy's contributions to entertainment and her current challenges: "An eye opening experience that everything could be stripped away." (14:11).
Game Segment: Deal Breakers
AD introduces the "Deal Breakers" game, where Ben and Hashim respond to relationship scenarios.
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Posting Partners on Instagram:
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Desire for Children:
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Being Friends with Exes:
Cringe Dating Moments
Ben and Hashim share their most awkward dating experiences.
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Hashim recounts a first date where his date invited him to her workplace as a bartender, leading to an uncomfortable interaction: "He was working, making margaritas, and I felt like I should tip him on a first date." (35:07)
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Ben describes a date obsessed with astrology, leading to confusion and an immediate end to the interaction: "She tried to do my entire astrological chart on our first date. I gave a fake birth time and never saw her again." (37:13)
Sarah's Interview and Reflections on Social Issues
Sarah, a former fiancé from Love is Blind, joins the conversation to address public criticisms and her handling of social issues on the show.
She acknowledges her initial discomfort with discussions on Black Lives Matter and the LGBTQ community: "I was embarrassed about how I handled those conversations, but they've been crucial for my personal growth." (45:12). Sarah emphasizes her journey from avoidance to active engagement, aiming to educate herself and support marginalized communities: "I'm an ally to all those communities and want to lead with love and curiosity." (52:04)
When addressing accusations of manipulating women on social media, Sarah clarifies her lack of malicious intent: "I did the best I could and never wanted to hurt anyone." (57:17). She stresses the importance of honest communication and owning up to past mistakes: "I need to continue striving to have tough conversations and educate myself." (55:11)
Sarah also recounts her breakup with Sarah post-show, highlighting the emotional challenges and the importance of clear communication: "We both said no, but the way it unfolded was confusing and hurtful." (66:27).
Takeaways and Personal Growth
Ben reflects on his experiences, emphasizing the importance of clear communication and understanding personal needs in relationships: "Know how you like to be loved and ensure your partner does too." (74:29). He discusses the challenge of navigating dating life post-show, given increased public attention: "It might be harder to decipher genuine connections because of the DMs." (75:48).
Hashim shares his key takeaway of actively choosing someone who aligns holistically with him: "Choose someone who actively chooses you every day and aligns emotionally, physically, and spiritually." (75:48). He advises against holding on to relationships out of obligation: "Don't hold on to a relationship because you invested time in it." (75:48).
Sarah emphasizes the significance of confronting and engaging with difficult conversations: "Not avoiding the difficult conversations is crucial for personal growth and relationship blossoming." (71:15). She advocates for using her platform to shed light on social issues and support educational dialogues: "I will use my platform to drive positive outreach on these issues." (55:51).
Conclusion
The episode of What's the Reality? offers an in-depth look into the lives of reality TV stars Ben and Hashim, exploring their personal journeys, relationships, and growth post-show. Through candid discussions and heartfelt advice, the guests highlight the complexities of love, the importance of self-care, and the necessity of engaging with social issues authentically. Host AD masterfully navigates through various topics, ensuring a rich and engaging experience for listeners, whether they're reality TV enthusiasts or individuals seeking meaningful relationship insights.
Notable Quotes:
- Hashim: "Stop romanticizing red flags. It's not cute." (09:05)
- Ben: "We were like the therapists of the show." (20:16)
- Sarah: "Not avoiding the difficult conversations is crucial for personal growth." (71:15)
- Hashim: "Choose someone who actively chooses you every day." (75:48)
For more insights and episodes, follow AD on all social media platforms and tune in weekly to What's the Reality? where love, relationships, and reality TV intersect with authenticity, humor, and heart.