How We Found Our Husbands: When You Know, You Know! | Sadie Robertson Huff | Melodie Malone | Chidima Craig

Summary

WHO AHH That's Good Podcast - Episode Summary

Episode Title: How We Found Our Husbands: When You Know, You Know!
Release Date: June 30, 2025
Host: Sadie Robertson Huff
Guests: Chidima Craig and Melodie Malone from Passion

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1. Introduction

In this heartfelt episode of the "WHOA That's Good" podcast, host Sadie Robertson Huff welcomes listeners to an engaging conversation with Chidima Craig and Melodie Malone from Passion. The discussion centers around their personal journeys to finding their life partners, delving into the nuances of singleness, divine timing, and the beauty of godly relationships.

2. Sharing Their Wedding Experiences

Melodie Malone:
“It really was the best day of my life… people felt so loved and God was so glorified” [04:41].

Melodie and Chidima both recently celebrated their marriages, sharing detailed accounts of their wedding days. Melodie describes her wedding as a blend of cultures, honoring her Indian heritage with vibrant traditions such as a dance party, henna, and an Indian DJ, complemented by a Christian ceremony that emphasized love and joy. Chidima reflects on her wedding in Atlanta, highlighting the union of her Texan and Nigerian families and the serendipitous sunshine that blessed their day.

3. Navigating Singleness and Longing for a Partner

The conversation shifts to the emotional landscape of singleness. Melodie opens up about the fluctuating feelings of confidence and longing she experienced while being single. She shares, “There was a point where I just felt like I was being left behind… questioning if I was missing out on growing as a person” [13:55]. This reflection underscores the societal pressures and personal struggles that often accompany the journey to finding a spouse.

4. Stories of Meeting and Falling in Love

Chidima Craig:
“I broke up with him because I wasn’t capable of giving him the love he deserved” [51:21].

Chidima recounts her meeting with her husband, Michael, emphasizing a gradual and faith-driven approach to their relationship. Their initial friendship, cultivated through church activities during the COVID lockdown, blossomed into love after overcoming a brief separation. Chidima shares a pivotal moment when she realized her deep feelings during a Christmas Eve event, leading to a heartfelt exchange and eventual reconciliation.

Melodie Malone:
“We had the gift of becoming really good friends, without any pressure” [38:03].

Similarly, Melodie details her relationship with Jay, highlighting the importance of friendship and mutual growth. Initially dismissing any romantic interest, Melodie’s feelings evolved as they continued to support and inspire each other spiritually. Their bond, built on a foundation of genuine friendship and shared faith, ultimately led them to marriage.

5. Lessons and Insights on Relationships

Sadie and her guests delve into profound insights about relationships, emphasizing the significance of patience, divine timing, and personal growth. They discuss the concept of being "the single friend" and maintaining meaningful connections despite life changes.

Sadie Robertson Huff:
“Don’t make really big decisions based off a really small thing” [31:04].

The conversation highlights the importance of allowing relationships to develop organically, without succumbing to societal pressures or superficial judgments. Both Chidima and Melodie advocate for building relationships that align with personal values and spiritual beliefs, ensuring that connections are both meaningful and lasting.

6. Encouragement for Listeners

As the episode concludes, Sadie extends heartfelt encouragement to listeners navigating their own relationship journeys. Melodie shares a beautiful metaphor inspired by Ben Stewart, illustrating the idea of running towards Jesus together and recognizing a partner who complements this spiritual pursuit.

Melodie Malone:
“Abide with Jesus and let that be the overflow of every other relationship” [57:31].

Both guests emphasize the importance of staying connected to one’s faith, practicing vulnerability, and embracing community. They encourage listeners to remain open to God’s plan, trusting that genuine love will manifest in due time.

7. Closing Thoughts

Sadie wraps up the episode by celebrating the wisdom and authenticity that Chidima and Melodie brought to the conversation. Their stories serve as inspiring examples of how faith, patience, and genuine connection can lead to fulfilling and godly relationships.

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Notable Quotes:

• Melodie Malone: “It was honestly... the best day of my life...” [04:41]
• Sadie Robertson Huff: “Don’t make really big decisions based off a really small thing.” [31:04]
• Chidima Craig: “I broke up with him because I wasn’t capable of giving him the love he deserved.” [51:21]
• Melodie Malone: “Abide with Jesus and let that be the overflow of every other relationship.” [57:31]

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This episode of "WHOA That's Good" offers a deeply personal and spiritually enriching exploration of how Chidima Craig and Melodie Malone found their life partners. Their journeys highlight the importance of faith, community, and authentic connections, providing valuable insights for listeners seeking meaningful relationships.

Transcript

[Chitima]

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[Melody]

5:00Am I'm up with a crisp Celsius energy drink running 12 miles today. Grab a green juice, quick change and head to work. Meetings, workshops. One more Celsius. No slowing down.

[Chitima]

Working late, but obviously still meeting the.

[Melody]

Girls for a little dancing.

[Chitima]

Celsius live fit. Go grab a cold, refreshing Celsius at.

[Melody]

Your local retailer or locate [e-mail].

[Host]

What is up, Scissors and friends? Happy Monday, everybody, y' all. I hope you're having a good start to your week, but, oh, it's about to get so much better because today we get to have a fun girl chat with two incredible people that are probably no strangers to you. You've probably seen them, you've worshiped alongside of them, but maybe you don't know them on a personal level. So today we have Chitima and Melody from Passion with us. So thank y' all for coming to Louisiana. Absolutely.

[Melody]

So fun.

[Host]

I mean, this is really fun. Like, it's not. You guys both actually been here a couple times for conference. And Chinma, you were here for the retreat, which I'll never forget because, you know, you know how, like, you have this perspective of someone. And, like, for me, I'm just gonna tell you, my perspective. You is like, you're very cool. Okay?

[Chitima]

Like, she is.

[Host]

I mean, you. You are. It's not just a perspective, it's a fact. Okay, Exactly. And so I'm like, she's really, really, really cool. And we've invited her into this space to lead worship, but also to hang. Like, we want you to have, like, make friends, too. And we were doing the most ridiculous things at that retreat. And I just remember, like, looking over at you be like, cinema's here.

[Chitima]

I loved every moment.

[Host]

That is so great. You dove in.

[Chitima]

Oh, yeah.

[Host]

It was like, the greatest compliment when you told me. You were like, I don't normally do these things. Like, I would have normally just gone to the room.

[Melody]

Yeah.

[Host]

But I was like, but you stayed.

[Chitima]

Because you made such a, like, welcoming space, such a fun space. I was like, I don't know any of these girls except for Sadie. And this is a blast.

[Host]

People were like burping their ABCs. It was like that level of like, weird night and the games.

[Chitima]

I'm thinking of that picture that you sent to me of. I don't remember what game it was, but it's just me doing this, having the time of my life.

[Host]

See, I have this, like, my grandma instilled this in me. She's like, no one thinks they like forced fun, but everyone appreciates forced fun, right? It's like if you just say, we're doing it, like, you just do it.

[Chitima]

Yeah.

[Host]

My mom's, you know, 40th birthday, I was like, hey, I'm planning it. I got this. And I was like, but just be open minded, okay? Because it's. You might be a little embarrassed, but. But just don't feel that way. Just full sin. And I invited like all of her friends from like all over the states that came and I played this big game of like Nitty Gritty, which is actually a game we played at Camp Shioka. It's similar to the game you were a part of. And it's goofy. These are like, sorry, is my 50th birthday. These are like 50 year olds and they're like all. And like Matt Redmond and he did like a fashion walk. And they were like, how did you get Matt Redmond to a fashion walk? I'm like, that is forced fun.

[Chitima]

That's it right there.

[Melody]

Okay, got it.

[Host]

Today might be a little bit of force, but I'm just kidding, it's not going to be forced at all. Today's going to be real fun because we're having girl chat. My hope for this was that, like I said, people have seen you guys lead worship. People have worshiped alongside of you. And the perspective most people do have of you is you are amazing. You're super cool, you clearly love the Lord, your voices are so much bigger than your bodies. Like, y' all are just powerhouses. But y' all also are two women who like. Also, you just got married. Like, literally just got married a month ago. Not even a month ago. Yeah, a month ago. I actually, like, had. Have had the honor of like, knowing y' all before you met your husbands and now like, seeing y' all meet your husbands get married. And it's just been super cool. So I'm like, you know, we just need a straight up girl chat. And I'm super excited to have it. So since we're bringing up that you just got married, can we talk about the wedding for a second?

[Melody]

We can? Yeah, absolutely.

[Host]

Tell us about your wedding because it looked out absolutely epic.

[Melody]

Oh, my gosh. It was honestly, like, this is gonna be so cliche, but it really was the best day of my life, which is crazy, but mainly because, like, we had this, like, picture in our minds and in our hearts, like, my husband and I, that we really just wanted one people to feel loved and God to be glorified. And as we've talked to people, like, after the wedding, like, the number one thing people have been like was we just had so much fun, and we felt so loved and, like, God was so glorified. So it was just like, it feels like what we dream, dreamed actually became a reality. And just to stand there and have, like, all of these people that we're older, so I'm 38 and he's 43. And so have to have lived so much life, and then to be able to stand there and look out at all of your people, it's not as much your parents, friends, as it is, like, when you get married when you're young, but it's like, our people. It was just like, I was so overwhelmed with gratitude to be able to stand there and just be like. And it was just. It was so much fun.

[Host]

Honestly.

[Melody]

It was so fun.

[Host]

And y' all. Both of y' all have, like, blended cultures in your marriage. So you had, like. That was so cool to see everyone from passionate dressed up. I've never seen these people in this context. Tell me a little bit about that and the fun of it.

[Melody]

Well, so. So my husband is Indian. And so the night before, like, our, like, our Christian ceremony, I guess, if you want to put it that way, like, we wanted to honor the traditions of his culture. And so we had a sanghi and Mindy. And so it was just basically, it's just like a fun, like, dance party with Indian food and an Indian DJ and henna and all those kind of things, and so. Which was a blast. And so we told people, like, you can come in Indian attire or you can come in cocktail attire, but everyone was like, no. Like, this is our chance. Like, we want to dress up and all that kind of stuff.

[Host]

I think it was Ellie Holcomb. Her outfit was so cute. Understood these.

[Melody]

So cute, you know, like, oh, absolutely. Ellie is one of the most fun people on the planet. And so she just had a blast.

[Host]

That is so fun. It's so fun to, like, hear this, because I think it was a couple years ago that we were all in the air where I don't even remember what airport we were in. Do you have any Memory of this. And we were talking about.

[Chitima]

Yes.

[Host]

You being single. And we were talking about, like, you really desiring to meet your spouse, but it hadn't happened yet. Like, we just got in this little talk.

[Melody]

Yeah.

[Host]

And it's just crazy because fast forward to now, and you're a month into your marriage with someone you've known for a really long time.

[Melody]

Yes.

[Host]

Like, we're going to dive into all that. But since we talked about your wedding, Chitima, tell us a little bit about your wedding and your spouse.

[Chitima]

Yes, our wedding. So we got married January 20, 2023. So we are. We're approaching two and a half years, which is crazy because I feel like I just got married yesterday. But it was so much fun. I'm from Texas originally, so he's from Atlanta. So we got married in Atlanta. All my family from Texas and from Nigeria, because my family is also Nigerian. Everyone came from all over. And that's one of the most special things I think, for me is, like, all of your people together and, you know, cousins and aunts that I hadn't seen since I was. That I have no, like, recollection of. Like, I haven't seen. They haven't seen me since I was a baby. Everyone coming together to celebrate us. But it was so much fun. We got married on a Friday. I remember that week. That whole week was so rainy. And I was like, God, please. It was supposed to rain on our wedding day. And I was like, God, please, please let the sun come out. And that was the one day that the sun was out that whole week. Which I was like, God, you see me? It was so much fun. I just. It was incred. And then a month later, we had our Nigerian wedding. We went back to Texas for that and did that with my family, which is so amazing. But, yeah, my husband is Michael. Well, his government name is Carl Michael Craig iii. He'll probably hate me saying this right now.

[Host]

We needed this.

[Chitima]

That's his government name, but everyone calls him Michael.

[Host]

He is funny.

[Chitima]

He is hilarious.

[Host]

Instagram cracks me up. I always show Christian because of, like, did you know Michael was like this? And he's like, no one knows.

[Chitima]

I know. No one knows. He is the funniest person on the planet. 100%.

[Host]

Both of Yale's husbands are really funny.

[Chitima]

Oh, hilarious.

[Melody]

He is crazy, and he's hilarious. Crazy, yes.

[Chitima]

So funny.

[Host]

I love it. And Chino, how old were you whenever y' all got married?

[Chitima]

I. We got married four days after I turned 28.

[Host]

Okay, awesome.

[Chitima]

Sweet.

[Host]

That's so great. One of the reasons I thought this. This chat would be so fun is because it's really funny on this podcast because it is primarily, like, women who listen, and it's like, 20 to 35, like, is the biggest age range, and then, you know, some lower, some older. But when we talk about relationships, it is always, like, the hot topic. That's what, like, people listen to the most. The everything is just higher. When we talk about relationships, it's just funny because we don't. Yeah, we haven't really planned that. It's just when we organically talk about it. And so when we started doing our analytics this year and seeing that, we're like, hey, we need to dive more into this. Like, people clearly want more wisdom when it comes to relationships. And I think you guys have such good stories to speak into it because y' all are married, and you have, you know, that side of things. But you. You were single for a long time. You both, like, have talked about that too. And so we're not just talking to the married person here. We're not just talking to the dating or engage. You're talking about to the single person. We're talking about all of it, you know, And I think that, you know, in our culture, there's just, like, so much oversaturation with relationships where it comes, like, the Bachel and Instagram couples, and, like, everyone's obsessed with this idea of a relationship. But I love talking about in the godly context that it is. And so how cool that we get to talk about Yalls stories and the beauty of both of them and meeting your spouses and the singleness and all of it in between. And so, Mel, tell me a little bit about your singleness story, because I know you went through, like, different periods of time where sometimes you felt really confident in that and sometimes you felt the longing for it. Can you just take us back there and kind of speak to the person in that season of life, y' all. Summer is supposed to be about making memories, not dragging yourself through the heat feeling totally drained. And if you're pregnant in the summer, like me, like, it is cranking the heat up even more. And that is why Element is an absolute summer lifesaver. Their new lemonade salt flavor is everything. It is salty, tart, refreshing, and it is. Seriously, it levels up your hydration game so that you can squeeze every drop out of summer. I can throw a stick of lemonade salt into my water before I head outside with the kids or even toss it into my iced tea for a little extra you know, Arnold Palmer vibes. Element isn't just delicious. It is formulated with the perfect science fat ratio of electrolytes to help get your body hydrated and keep it that way. Before Element, I didn't even realize how much my body was missing. I. You know, sometimes you just deal with things, right? I just thought, oh, leg cramps are normal. But no, that fatigue, that brain father's muscle cramps, they're gonna start when you're not hydrated. But when you add Element to your mix, y' all, it changes everything. And bonus, you can actually try Element totally risk free. If you don't like it, give it away to a salty friend and they will refund your order, no questions asked. I love Element, y' all. I drink either the watermelon or the raspberry every day. It makes me feel so much better. I love the taste of it as well, but I will say it is salty. So if you're not used to that, get ready. But then you're going to actually crave it once you get used to it. My husband loves their sparkling cans. We just are huge fans of Element because it makes us feel our best. So Elements Lemonade salt is available for a limited time only. Get yours while supplies last. Also, you can get a free Element sample pack with any [e-mail] Whoa. Again, that's drink elemenT-R-I n k l M-N-T.com Whoa.

[Melody]

Yeah. Which it wasn't that long ago, which is, like, crazy. But I think for me, it really was like a very seasonal thing. I mean, like, like I said, it was 38. So you go through seasons where you're super excited, you love it, it's very fun. You have all the freedom that you get from being, like, single and you're like, yes, I love this. And then there's other seasons where you look at your friends and you feel like for me, there was this point where it was like, I just felt like I was being left behind. Like, I was like, all my friends are getting married. My two closest friends were having kids. You know, it was just like, oh, man. Like, this just starts to be like, you start to look at the clock and be like, am I just being left behind? Even to the point where I was like, like starting to have conversations about, like, am I not being even, like, challenged, like, in growing, like, as a human being? Because everybody always says, like, you know, your. Your biggest, like, challenger will be your husband or your, you know, your spouse, you know? You know, and so I was like, well, man, am I, like, missing out on actually growing into who God has me to be because I'm not married. And I just had to, like, wrestle with a lot of those things and be like. I came to realize that's not true because that's not who God. That's not who God is. Like. And if anything, I have the Holy Spirit. And so the Holy Spirit is the main, like, counselor, you know, and the person that's gonna challenge me.

[Host]

That's great.

[Melody]

But it was this, like, roller coaster to some degree. And then there really were, like, there became a large season of time where I would not let myself desire a husband or a relationship because it just became too painful. Like, and I was just like, it's easier to just not want it, like, and just be like, great. I'm. I'm happy with my life, which is true to some degree. Like, I was so satisfied in so much of my singleness until two years ago. And at the Grove, our women's conference at Passion, I was asked to speak on a panel which is not, like, that's very normal, but on. I was, like, the person on the panel to speak about singleness, which is, you know, you kind of become, like, the spokesperson for, like, singleness.

[Host]

When you become a spokesperson for something you never signed yourself up to, you're like, okay.

[Melody]

But then you're like, okay. But, like, it's like anything. It's like, your story. Like, everybody has their own story, and God has you in that space to speak to other people who are walking through that thing. And it's like, I want to embrace this. I don't want to despise what the life that God has given me and the opportunity he has given me to help other people walk through this same season. But it was in that, like, that preparation for that panel that I realized and was finally able to articulate that I have been a. Praying. Praying something and asking God for a husband for. At that point, you could just roughly say, 20 years. Like, if I really started praying at 16 for my husband because I thought, I'm gonna get married right out of college. Like, this is what you do in the south especially, you know? Like, you just get married. Like, you meet your husband in college, you get married and all that. So I just got to this point where I was like, I've been asking God for this for 20 years, and I haven't seen him come through. And it just was like, I honestly had to grieve that. I had to. I had to say, like, God, I am disappointed. I Am frustrated. And I'm probably angry to some degree that this has been something I've been asking you for, and I haven't seen the fulfillment of it. But in doing that, in like, admitting all of that and being honest to God, he's just started to wake up that desire again. And I was like, I'm not gonna. I don't want this to be dormant anymore. I'm gonna actually start leaning into this more and praying specifically for my husband, whether he shows up or not. I'm gonna be like, hey, these are the things I would love to see, like, the characteristics. And so I just started journaling, like, throughout that year, being like, okay, this is like what I want. Like, I would love him to be funny, you know, I would love him, you know, to love people. I'm an introvert. I would love him to be an extrovert and a lover of people, because I think that would be a really good challenge for me. You know, like, just like things like that. Exactly. Like, that's the thing. And so like, and we were friends at that point, but I didn't know it was him until like later in that year, I just. I started like, looking back at my journal entries and just what I had my prayers and I was like, oh, my gosh. I think it's like, it's Jay. Like. And that was a. That's a whole another story, but crazy.

[Host]

We'll get into it. We'll get into it. I want to ask you one more thing about that, because you talked about feeling like, left behind as your friends begin to get married and have kids. I've seen this happen with like, a lot of different people. Some in my own life, but others in just other friends lives. It's like when other people start getting married or having kids, and the person who feels like they're being left behind, like, they start to like, retreat and remove themselves from those friendships. Like, I remember one time my sister sharing with me that she didn't want to be friends with this group people anymore because they were just in such different seasons. And I was like, well, that makes sense. But you also can learn from people in different seasons. But there is like a time where you want to step away. Like, I guess we had this whole debate on is it good to, you know, dive in even though you do feel different and just, you know, kind of be in the messiness, or do you need to take a step back because it's protecting your heart? And I don't even remember what conclusion we ever came to in that Conversation. I just remember me and my actual sister having a deep conversation about this. Where did you find yourself? And like, did you want to retreat from your friends who were getting married or did you just like, dive in and allow yourself to be the single one in that?

[Melody]

Yeah, I found myself. I think I had both worlds. This is the. This is kind of just the truth of it. I had friends that were still single living in Atlanta, like, so I definitely had girls that we like the. We could go out on the weekends or do whatever. But I also found myself, like, getting into families, like, and just being like, hey, I can come watch your kid while y' all go on date night. You know, like things that I'm not able to do now, but just being like, man. And like, I had some like, one family in particular that just like welcomed me in and I was. I was a part of their family for a few years, you know, they were just like, how can you like, really cool, you know? And so I think it was a. It was a. Both and for me, you know, it was like, I still, I have. I have these single friendships which are really nice. And it's like, oh, yeah, I still may have been like the older one out of, you know, some of those, but I also didn't shy away from like just being involved in my friends lives that had families and getting to know their kids and being anti male.

[Host]

You know, Like, I think that's really cool and really good advice, like to. To have both if you're able to. Because I do think sometimes like your insecurity says, okay, I just want to be around people who are like me, you know, and that can be in so many different things. It's not just engagement or marriage or having kids. That's just like people who are like me in general, you know, just because you don't want to be around someone who maybe challeng challenges you or pushes you or is different than you, but man, what a blessing it is because it does help you grow when you are around people who aren't like you and you develop such close friendships that you're within a family. Like, you know, a family as people like friend, family. But like, I. I think that the beauty is having both if you're able to. So I love that advice. It's so good because I think a lot of people feel that tension. Like, okay, well, I don't want to be like the one that's not like them and they're in them. Like, they're normally not thinking that, you know, like they're not how they, like, view you. Yeah, yeah. You're not, like, the single friend. You're the friend, you know, you're not the one that's have kids. You're the friend, you know, And I think that we think people view us as, like, the thing we lack, but you view yourself as the thing you like. Other people don't normally put that on you, you know? Tell me a little bit about Meat and Michael. Were you looking for a relationship? Was that something you were desiring or did it kind of just happen out of the blue?

[Chitima]

You know, I, I was looking, but, like, not. You know what I mean? Like, I'm open, but I'm chilling.

[Host]

I would never.

[Chitima]

Yeah, I would never say. No, but I'm chilling. But no, seriously, I would say, here's what I'll say. I was definitely open to whatever God wanted to do, of course.

[Melody]

But.

[Chitima]

But I wouldn't say that I was looking just because, like, I would say I spent all of my college years, like, wanting to be in a relationship and wanting to find somebody. And I, like, there was a season of my life where I was so consumed by that mentally, and it became so draining. And I ended up dating someone right at the end of college. Moving, like, as I moved to Atlanta. And I think I thought, like, okay, this is it. Like, this person's gonna fulfill me, and I'm. It's smooth sailing from here. And that's not the reality of it because, you know, no one can fulfill except for God, you know. And so after that, that relationship ended after a couple of years, and I was like, you know what? I'm actually good. I think it's time for me to, you know, like, seek God and let him, you know, tell me who I am. And at that point, too, I hadn't really done a good job of, like, building community and things like that. So I was like, this is the season that God has me in, and this is where God has me, which was Atlanta. So let me just dive in to serving my church and getting to know God more, like, knowing his word, building community, like, making solid friendships. Because I, I, I, I'm an adult at, like, we need people. So I would say when, when I met Michael, I. We don't remember meeting each other, unfortunately.

[Host]

Unfortunately.

[Chitima]

Right.

[Host]

Well, it's funny because, like, some people, like my husband, remember everything. He's like, oh, yeah, I remember what you were wearing. Like, you do?

[Melody]

You're like, oh, cool.

[Chitima]

Love to hear that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Melody]

Yeah.

[Chitima]

So we don't remember meeting each other which is kind of sweet. It's like we've always just kind of been around each other.

[Host]

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[Chitima]

In 2017 because that's when I moved to Atlanta. But we didn't start dating till 2021. So it was just really sweet in 2020, you know, COVID lockdown, crazy times. During the summer, our church was doing like a food bank for the community. And so they had people sign up, like door holders from the church sign up to help with it. So every time I tell the story, I'm like, so I signed up. And it sounds so noble, but it was. I was so happy to be there. But it was also my way of getting out of the house. You know, it was literally my one outing because it was every week you.

[Host]

Can flex on that noble thing you were doing.

[Chitima]

Inspired. You know, it was my way of getting out of the house and serving the community. But Michael, he. That was part of his job. So he works at the church, and at that time, he was a resident at Passion City City, and that was part of his job. And so we just started hanging out every week at this food bank. And I remember, like, I had known him at that point for, like, four years, but I had never gotten to know him. And so I just remember texting a friend, and I was like, you know, I think it's kind of funny and kind of cute and kind of fun. Michael. And she was like, okay, keep that in mind. I was like, well, it doesn't mean anything, but, like, I'm just saying, right? I'm just putting it out there in genuinely, genuinely. I just was like, oh, he's really cool. Didn't think anything of it, but I think this food bank lasted for maybe two months or so. So we were actually cultivating a friendship, which I love. And so after that, I, I, I wasn't looking, but I was like, it was in the back of my mind.

[Host]

So. He's funny.

[Chitima]

Yeah. But he's sweet, and I can appreciate that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All the things. And so we became friends after that. And so, so he would, like, text me videos, or when we would see each other at church, we would, like, stop and talk to each other. And so it was sweet to be able to become friends with Michael. But I would say December, like, around Christmas time, was when the shift happened. We were at our Christmas Eve service, and I was leading, he was working, and he texted me at the beginning of the day, and he was like, hey, before you leave today, come find me because I want to give you something. And I was like, okay, great. I have to fly back home to Texas for Christmas, so I'll have to leave asap, but if I get a chance, like, I'll. I'll be sure to come and see you. Right. And after that, I lit. I was like. I texted my friend, and I was like, one of our mutual friends. I was like, does Michael like me? And just. Just question.

[Host]

Just wondering.

[Chitima]

Yeah, Just curious. And he was like, o. I can't say. I was like, okay, this is so cute. I know you.

[Melody]

We were, like, 12, right?

[Chitima]

Right. So I was like, okay. So now I'm like, in my head, I'm, like, nervous about it. We. We do the gathering. It's over, and I'm walking out, but I text him. I'm like, okay, meet me, like, by the doors. And he comes to meet me, and he was like, hey, this is kind of silly, but I got you a Christmas gift. I was was like, oh. And he was like, I remember that you told me that you love Hallmark movies, and so it's super dumb, but, like, I bought this on ebay. It was like a VHS of a Hallmark movie.

[Host]

That is really cute.

[Chitima]

It was so sweet.

[Melody]

I was like, VHS player?

[Chitima]

Like, no, I didn't even remember telling him that. He's super thoughtful. So I was like, that's really sweet. Like, thank you so much. Da da da. Right? And so I had to go. So I was like, thank you, da da. We leave, I get to my car, and I text our friend, and I'm like, okay, so Michael does like me, question mark.

[Host]

And he was like, to ebay for.

[Chitima]

A Hallmark, like, who still goes on ebay? His first thing. Amazing.

[Melody]

First things first.

[Chitima]

First things first. So anyway, I. I go back to Texas that night, right? And we have a VCR at my house. And so I remember seeing it, and I was like, I could text Michael right now. Cause at this point, I don't know how I feel. I'm just like, okay, this is new territory. So I see the vcr and I. I'm like, that'd be funny if I just, like, text him at a pic, texted him a picture and been like, hey, I should have brought my. My gift. But then I like, went back and forth with myself, and I was like, you know what?

[Melody]

Just text him as we do, right?

[Chitima]

As we do. I was like, you know what? That doesn't mean anything if I text him. Let's just text him.

[Host]

Oh, yeah.

[Chitima]

So I send him a picture of it, and I was like, should have brought it. And he was like, oh, ha ha. Then we start talking. We going back and forth. We're going back and forth. And he was like, at the end the day of. Of it, he was like, hey, well, I hope you have a great Christmas. Like, can't wait. We have conference after Christmas. So he was like, can't wait to see you again, like, in a week or so when you're back, praying for you as you prepare for conference. D. I was like, oh, thanks.

[Melody]

Oh, shoot. That's so sweet.

[Host]

Okay.

[Chitima]

And so then we didn't talk for a month after that.

[Host]

What? But what. That was such a halt, sharp turn.

[Melody]

I I.

[Host]

Why?

[Chitima]

That was not on Me, actually. I actually wanted him to reach out, but I didn't want to be the first person to reach out. And I think for him, he was just kind of giving me my space. But also, I don't know. Actually, I've never asked him, so maybe this should be a thing. I know.

[Host]

It's like the moment in the podcast. You phone a friend, and I'm like, wait, hold on.

[Chitima]

Can we pause for a second? I don't remember why he did. He didn't. He. He has told me before, I think maybe life just got busy. I don't know.

[Host]

But maybe he got nervous. Like, maybe he got nervous.

[Chitima]

That is. That. That could be a thing. But my birthday is in January, so then I heard from him on my birthday, and then I would say that's when we started, like, actually really getting to know each other. And we went on a date after that, and, yeah, now we're married next year.

[Host]

Because it was your birthday right around your birthday.

[Chitima]

Yes. So that would have been in 2021.

[Host]

Okay. And then, because I remember it was, like, after Passion, y' all were getting married, and it was crazy.

[Melody]

Yes.

[Chitima]

Yeah, exactly Two years after that.

[Host]

That's awesome. That's so sweet. See, this is good, because I do think that sometimes people. What's the best way to say this? I feel like girls get a little too sassy in relationships where it comes to, like, okay, if you don't hear from in a month. And, like, oh, well, he's done, like, totally. And it's like, yeah, okay, pump the brakes. Like, he might be nervous. Like, he might be giving your space. And I love that how, like, your perspective is, like, I'm not really sure why it doesn't have to be, like, so bad that he.

[Chitima]

A negative thing.

[Host]

And I do feel like people throw out really good guys and, like, opportunities because of, like, one little thing that they did. So I just love that it wasn't, like, that big of a deal. It's okay. Like, hey, that's all right. You came back together, and now you're married. So I'm like, hey, don't, like, make really big decisions based off, like, a really small thing, you know? And I think people just do that all the time. And it's so fun to hear your story because it's just, like, so relatable. All the texting you're, like, getting, you're thinking, what should I say? Right? For me and Christian, like, after I saw his dm, he sent me, I was like, okay, should I, like, DM him back? But Then I was like, oh, my sister's gonna kill me, because my sister's friends with him. And I knew she did not want me to date Christian or, like, talk to Christian. She's like, that's my friendship. And I'm like, totally. So I called Bella and I'm like, hey, so here's the deal. He sent me this DM before y' all actually even knew each other. And so it's like, only right that I respond, right? She's like, don't respond. Do not respond. I'm like, well, I, I do want to respond because, like, we could be friends. And wouldn't that be great? Because, like, me and you are friends, obviously. And then we could be friends, and I could just. We could all hang out, right? And then she's like, oh, my gosh. Just friends, like, do not. And I'm like, promise, like, this is totally going to be in the friend zone. And now, of course, we're married, and now it's our baby on the way. Oh, my gosh. Little text, right? Yeah, we text and text, and you start talking. They were talking to the phone. And the first phone call we had, I was, like, really trying to downplay it to my friends because everyone was knowing I needed to not get into another relationship. And that really was true, except for the fact that this was the right relationship.

[Chitima]

This was the right one, right?

[Host]

No, he was going to be.

[Melody]

No idea.

[Host]

I was like, it's literally nothing. I'm just trying to be his friend. Cuz, like, my, my sister is friends with him, and I just want to get to know him. Blah, blah. And I grabbed a chocolate covered banana from our freezer, and I was like, this is how chill this is. I'm gonna be, like, literally eating a chocolate cover now while I talk to him on the phone. I'm not even taking this seriously. I remember saying that.

[Chitima]

So chill.

[Host]

Yeah, like, as if that was salmon.

[Melody]

It was like, no big deal.

[Chitima]

That's so funny.

[Host]

And I remember, like, talking to this.

[Melody]

So funny.

[Host]

I, I, I don't even know if I've ever taken the story. I was sitting on my Jeep, eating this banana with him on speakerphone, like, listening. And then he started saying things that were so intriguing, and I was like, I'm so expressive even when I'm by myself. I chomped the banana in the yard, and I took him off speakerphone, started walking around, like, talking to him, and we talked serious. That was serious. No longer on speakerphone, sitting on the.

[Chitima]

Jeep, like, I'm walking banana's Gone.

[Host]

Banana is gone. You're not wasting time, like, talking back and forth. Like, an hour goes by, I come back inside. How's your call? I'm like, yeah, it's fine. Like, he's. He's really nice, you know, it's not a big deal at all. And so anyways, it's so funny, those early days when you think back, just laugh at, like, the things you were thinking and the ways that you were trying to navigate. 100% awkwardly said to him one day. This is, like, at the very beginning, we had been talking, like, every day for a couple weeks, probably, like, two weeks. We just got in the habit of talking, but we weren't, like, flirting. We weren't saying anything. It was just genuinely getting to know each other. And I was like, all right, I'll talk to you tomorrow. And. And I was like, or not. Like, we don't have to.

[Melody]

Like, if you're busy, if you want to. Like, a big deal.

[Host]

It was that awkward. I was like, we don't have to. And he was like, no, yeah, I'll talk to you more. I was like, okay, cool.

[Melody]

Bye.

[Host]

Hang out.

[Melody]

Like, you showed your hand.

[Chitima]

I know.

[Melody]

I really did.

[Host]

I really did. I was giddy. So it's so fun, too, how both of y' all knew your husbands for a little while before you started dating them or realizing that you even like them. And I think another thing that we put a lot of pressure on is, like, finding the one, you know? And I'm always just telling people, like, I don't even think that that's the right phrasing, like, finding the one, because I don't even think you realize it when you see them. You know, it's like a treasure hunt where you know what you're looking for. Then you see I found it.

[Melody]

Yeah.

[Host]

It's like, you get to know. And, like, the. Because this is gonna sound cheesy, but it's true. It's like the treasure really is on the inside, and you don't know that until you get to know someone, you know? So it's not like you just see it and you're like, that's it, right? Like, you get to know someone, and you're like, oh, this is it. That's why, like, as we were talking on the phone, I'm like, oh, this is different. Like, this. I'm really like, what you're saying. I'm growing from what you're saying. I'm becoming a better person. I want to talk to you more. Right? And then you kind of realize, oh, this might be the one, you know, but it's not something you just like stumble upon. Like love at first sight can be a thing. As far as, when I first saw Christian, I really was like, whoa, he's cute.

[Melody]

Yes.

[Host]

I didn't know I was going to marry him. You know, y' all, it is hot outside and it can be really hard to get through a night without getting sweaty and waking up just hot. And if you're waking up hot, cranky, or looking like you fought a bear in your sleep, I got you. You need to check out Miracle Made. Their sheets are inspired by NASA tech, so you know they're going to be pretty good. Infused with silver, these sheets are designed to keep you at the perfect temperature all night long. And huge bonus, they're self cleaning. Traditional sheets can actually collect more bacteria than a toilet seat. I know. So gross. But Miracle sheets Prevent up to 99.7% of that nastiness. So you can stay fresher longer and you don't have to do laundry every five minutes. Also, if you're like me and would rather sleep on clouds and sandpaper, Miracle sheets feel luxurious without that crazy five star price tag. Seriously, treat yourself, y' all. You deserve to wake up feeling fresh and happy, not sweaty and stressed. Christian and I love our Miracle made sheets. Literally. He is so picky about his bed sheets now because we are conditioned to Miracle sheets. They are absolutely amazing. To upgrade your sleep as the weather heats up, go to try Miracle.com Whoa. To try Miracle made sheets today. And whether you're buying them for yourself or as a gift for a loved one, if you order today, you can save over 40% off and use my promo code Whoo. At checkout and you'll get a free three piece towel set and save an extra 20%. Miracle is so confident in their product, it's backed with a 30 day money back guarantee guarantee. So if you aren't 100 satisfied, you'll get a full refund. Upgrade your sleep with Miracle made. Go to trymiracle.com Whoa. And use the code Whoa. To claim your free three piece towel set and save over 40 off. Again, that's trymiracle.com Whoa. To treat yourself. So Mel, tell me a little bit about you and Jay's backstory because you knew him for how long?

[Melody]

We've known each other now for 15 years.

[Host]

Years. Wow. So yeah, that's crazy. For 15 years. Married for a month. So is that interpretive?

[Chitima]

Exactly.

[Host]

So like, okay, yeah, talk about because Chitima mentioned like the Shift, you know, for her, Michael, like, what was the shift for 15 years. So, like, well, so I.

[Melody]

When we met, I did not know what to do with him. Like, so talk about, like, love at first sight. I was like, I. He did not fit in any box that I like, that I knew how to put him in. Like, especially any, like, Christian man, like, box, you know? Like, I grew up in a pretty, like, sheltered. Like, not in a bad way, but just very much Southern, like, Christian, Southern Baptist, like, culture. And so I. I had this picture of what a man who loved Jesus looked like. And I will just say straight up, Jay does not look like that. And yet he is the man that I like would say today, he loves Jesus better than most anyone that I know, like, in the way that he actually lives out his life. And so don't discount, like, what you're saying. Like, don't discount, like, what you assume with your assumptions, like, because get to know somebody, like, because it took us that long, even. And that. That's part of, like.

[Host]

It's a good word. I just want to repeat that to somebody listening. Because a lot of people would discount people for the smallest reasons. It's like, oh, well, I didn't really want to date someone who was a pastor. I was like, why? Like, what if he's amazing and he's the best? Or I didn't want to date someone who. Because for me, even I was like, I didn't assume that I would date someone who was in a fraternity at the time. And then here I am, and I meet Christian, and I'm like, he's the best guy I know. You know? So it's like, you have these things where you want to date someone because of da, da, da. That's so unfair. That's so limiting to what God really can do.

[Melody]

It really is. And, like, I mean, Jay would tell you, be the first to tell you. He was like, I never thought I would marry a worship leader. He was like, that was not on the cards, like, for me, you know, so it's real. It's like a real thing. So it's just. Just be open to all of that. But so for, like, for us, we had the gift of becoming really good friends, actually. Coming out of COVID Like, we had. There's a friend of ours, a couple, like, and the four of us just started, like, hanging out a bunch. And even at the time, we were not interested in each other. And I remember my best friend Lauren asking me. She was like, just be straight up with me. She was like, do you like Jay? And I was like, absolutely not. I was, like, so adamant. Like, and it was real, too. It was just, like, I was like, no. There's, like, literally, he is a great friend. I can talk to him about, like, almost anything. Like, this is great, but, like, absolutely no interest in anything, like, other than that. And people asked him the same thing. And we were both so adamant that we did not like each other. And then we just, like, we had this gift of getting to know each other without any pressure. Like, and I do think that, like, in dating, especially in Christian culture, we feel like, well, I have to marry this person. You don't just get to know them. Like, just, like, think about them under the guise of, this is another human being that, like, I get the opportunity to just sit here and get to know, like, what makes you tick, like, who. How. Who has God created you to be? And maybe if, like, that our, like, paths will align and God will have us going together, but maybe not, you know, like, there's no pressure for that.

[Host]

So good. A lot of people. One of my friends said this recently. That's so good. She's like, it's not awkward when you break up if you date well, you know, true. Like, I mean, there is awkwardness if you date well for a really long time. Obviously, like, there's that. But typically when you date well, in the sense of, like, just getting to know each other, asking good questions, it doesn't have to be, like, a super big deal when you decide, oh, we're not actually the one for each other. But I'm, like, so glad I got to know you.

[Melody]

Yeah, but you're still, like, a great human being. I, like, want you to find the best, you know, like, the best and that kind of thing. But for us, it was more of, like, we're just cultivating a friendship. And then it was one day, I. I remember a guy, A random guy called me or, like, had gotten my number from someone and was like, hey, can we, like, set up a phone call? He didn't live in Atlanta, and I talked to him. And honestly, it was one of the worst conversations I have ever had with another guy. Like, it was just, like, pretty sure he, like, called me a commodity. Like, basically like. Or, like, referred to me as, like. It was just, like. It was so, like, it was awful. But in, like, that conversation, it made me put my conversations with Jay in perspective, and it made me think, like, okay, if I date someone, anyone, this random guy, or, like, anyone, my relationship with Jay would have to shift. Like, the way like, kind of like to use intimacy of our relationship would not be appropriate if I was like in a relationship with someone else. And I was like, I don't like that. Yeah, I was like, actually that. I hate that. And that was like, oh no. Like it really just started like putting. And then like I noticed like when we were in, in like work context because we do work together. Like if. Cuz he can be very flirty and he has lots of girl, like that kind of thing. If he was like flirting with somebody else, I was like, I don't like that. Oh no. Like, and so like all of these like things like started processing and then like I said earlier, like I started reading back through like all of like what I had prayed for and asked for. And I was like, I think it's him. Like, I really do think it's him. But at this point he was not giving any of that, like, you know, like, and I remember I got the courage to tell one of my friends. I was like, I just think I need to say this out loud. But I was like, I think I like Jay. Like just to like see like her reaction. And she was like, yeah, that makes sense. And I was like, wait, I'm not crazy. Like, I just thought I was going to get this response of like, no, that's like, no, like that's crazy. You shouldn't, you know, like. And so honestly from there I just started doing what every girl should do. I just started flirting.

[Host]

That's so awesome.

[Melody]

I just didn't like, I was like, well I. I don't want to be the one to like have this converse. Like I don't know what else to do. Like he's kind of naturally a flirt. I'll just start flirting back. Like, I don't know. Like really?

[Host]

That's what you did?

[Melody]

Yeah, that's what I did. And he noticed and he did. But he wasn't letting me know. He was not. Like, I was like. So at one point I was like, am I really bad at this? I was like, maybe I'm just really bad at flirting. That's old.

[Host]

Like, seriously, I feel like it's easier just to tell someone, like, I like you and then they can then ask you on a date or something. But like to be like, I'm just gonna flirt, that is confidence.

[Melody]

But at this point we had been friends for so long that I was.

[Host]

Like, he'll see the shift.

[Melody]

He'll see the shift. And like, if he's interested, he'll just like. I just felt like I wanted him to initiate it, you know, like, it's just kind of like how I felt about it all. I was like, I don't really want to, like.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Melody]

And so he left the country to try and run away from, like, feelings.

[Host]

Thinking, like, ran into. I think it was when we were in London, and I was like, how did y' all get together? And he was telling me his version of the story. And he was saying, you know, we were friends. And then he actually was like, she started flirting with me, and I was scared. I was like, so I moved.

[Melody]

He went to Copenhagen. He was like, I think I need to go to Copenhagen for, like, three weeks. And when I come back, everything will be normal and I won't like her. Like, I don't know. It was just like, he, like, specifically wouldn't buy me something. I think while he was there, he was like, I'm not gonna get her anything. Like, it just, like, all these specific things. And then I think while he was there, he would tell you his version of the story is, I made these cookies for my friends that Christmas around that time. And I. They're oatmeal cream pies, and I just made them for a bunch of people, some of my closest friends. And so he had his in his car, and he came out to the car and was like, dealing with an issue. And he's like, ah, I'll have one of these, or whatever. And he said, like, when he bit down on the cookie and ate Ada, he's like, huh, maybe she's the one. And I was just. I was like, oh, my gosh. So, like, that's what he would tell you as it was all from a cookie. And that's how we realized that we.

[Host]

Should be together a lot different. Sometimes it just comes down to funny. Like, when you hear what's going on in their head, you're like, that's what you were thinking.

[Melody]

I was like, really?

[Host]

Honestly, Turmoil, right?

[Melody]

That feels so shallow.

[Host]

Cookies can take you along long way.

[Chitima]

And so it did, right?

[Host]

So.

[Melody]

So finally we did have a conversation.

[Host]

Word to a girl out there. If you don't know what to do, just bake cookies. Right?

[Melody]

Exactly. You're gonna.

[Chitima]

Yes.

[Host]

That is so funny. So you'll finally have a conversation.

[Melody]

Yeah. He finally, like, we sat in the car one night and he initiated the conversation, and we were like, do we want to risk it? Like, we knew that it was either.

[Host]

Going to be like, because you weren't together.

[Chitima]

Yeah.

[Melody]

I mean, all of it. It was like, we're gonna not have the friendship that we have.

[Chitima]

Have.

[Melody]

And it's. You know, either way, it's gonna either go great or we won't have this friendship anymore. But we decided that it was worth the risk.

[Host]

It's cool. It's so cool. Because there's no, like, copy and paste for what works for somebody to work what works for somebody else. And I think a lot of people are, like, opposites attract. And then some people are like, it's fun to be the same and blah, blah. And it's like, it really is just whatever God has for you. And. And I think, too. I don't really. This might be hot. Hot take. Maybe y' all disagree and that's okay. But, like, I don't really think there's. For you, you know, I think there's, like. I think God. There's, like, God's best and what God has planned and everything. And you want to follow that and lead that. But I also think, like, you do have choices and stuff. And I remember wedding dress shopping thinking about this.

[Melody]

Oh, yeah.

[Host]

Because when we were wedding dress shopping, every single dress I put on, it's beautiful. I was like, love it. This one could be this one could be this one. And then there were some that were obviously not great. And I was like, that doesn't really look good on my body. That. That's an obvious no. And then there's, like, the one that you put on, and it, like, makes you cry, and you don't know why, and you're just like, oh, this is the one. And it's not that it's, like, necessarily more beautiful than the others as far as, like, someone else to come in and say, actually, I like that one better, but that's not your one. Like, this is your one. And I feel like that when it comes to, like, picking your spouse, too, because I'm like, there are people I dated who were obviously not the right fit, right? Nope. Didn't work well. And there are people who are like, you're really cool. You're super nice. Like, could it work? Yes. Do I think it's God's best for either us?

[Melody]

No.

[Host]

And then it's. I mean, I meet Christian, and I'm like, he's amazing. And, like, he is the one for me. And the other people I dated are probably married now and have families, and it's awesome. And they were the one for someone else. But, like, I think that God does give you. He put, like, desires in your heart, and you start to see those in someone. It's like, oh, man. I Wrote this down. And I see this in that person. It's something I've always wanted, and this is what this person gives, man. I'm like, equally as good for them and their own life and what they prayed for, and it just, like, makes sense. So I just feel like sometimes we, I don't know, overcomplicate things. And it's like, no, God does have, like, what's best for you. There is, like, a fit for you, but there's also a lot of it that you get to decide too, you know, like, yeah, it's so beautiful. It's such a gift. One of my friend's dads always used to say this. He would say, like, I don't need to necessarily get to know. Like, I will get to know the guy. He's like, but I don't even really need to do that because I can first see it in my daughter. Like, I can see how the relationship was by the way she is. By her confidence, by how she's walking. And I was like, man, that's so true. Because when I think back to the ways I dated, I was different in those relationships than I am with Christian, where I feel like I'm my best.

[Chitima]

Right.

[Host]

So to, like, what was your relationship like with Michael as far as. Did you start to see a difference in yourself as y' all started dating and what were some of those shifts?

[Chitima]

Yeah, that's great question. Pms, pregnancy, menopause, being a woman is a lot. Ollie supports you and yours with expert solutions for every age and life stage. They just launched two new products exclusively at Walmart. Period Hero combats flow, mood swings and more during PMS and balance perimeno to support hormonal balance, mood, and metabolism during perimenopause. Grab [e-mail] these statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is. Is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. I would say, for me, our. Our story is. Is, first of all, God is sovereign. That's. That is why we're together. God is great, and he is sovereign. Because our dating was, honestly, kind of hard. Like I was saying earlier, we started, like, hanging out in January. Like, he would have said that we were dating at the time. I would have said we were hanging out at the time because I just had a hard time accepting love, honestly. And I had a hard time accepting his love. And so he just pursued me so heavily, and I just kind of received it at best, like, cautiously. And so we actually ended up breaking up. I broke up with him a couple of months after, after that, because I just was like, I. He's so great. He is pursuing me so well. He is showing me Jesus's love in ways that I genuinely have not seen yet. And like, it was freaky to me. And also too, I was like, I don't know if I'm capable of giving you that back and you deserve that. And so I ended up breaking up with him, which is so funny because I would call it a breakup, he would call it a break. And I guess technically it was a break because we're married. But even the way that like, we broke up, like, I broke up with him and I'm like sobbing, I'm crying, I'm like basically genuinely having a panic attack. And he's comforting me and he's like, no, it's okay. Like, God is sovereign. God is sovereign. And I'm like, like, I'm breaking it with you.

[Melody]

Why are you comforting me?

[Chitima]

But God is sovereign because in that time that we were apart, I began to realize, like, not only do I really care about him, but like, I'm wanting to know God more and also like, I am seeing God more through him, like, and through his pursuit of me specifically. And so I, I did start to notice the shift in me of like, oh my gosh, God, if this is even just a microcosm of the way that you love me, what? Why have I been rejecting your love? Like, why have I not, you know, like, really embraced your love for me? And so while we were apart, we were only apart for maybe two or three months. But during that time, like, that is the closest that I've been to God. And at that time, probably ever, as I was just like seeking him and pursuing relationship with him as he was pursuing relationship with me. And, and so I, Michael and I did end up getting back together. Spoiler alert. But in that he genuinely made me want to be a better person to love people. Well, like, he loves me really well. But something that I love about him is that kind of what we've been talking about. He's not like, he's super sarcastic, like really dry, super funny. And you might not think, think like, oh, he's nice. Not that he's mean, but like, you know what I mean?

[Host]

Like people think that about Christian often.

[Chitima]

He's not like overly.

[Host]

This podcast have told us they think that about Christians, right? Like, I think it's funny. That's his humor. It's hilarious. But it's like cuz you know them, right?

[Melody]

Cuz you Know them, you love them.

[Host]

But sometimes people are like, is that rude?

[Chitima]

No. 100%. But he truly has the kindest heart of anybody I know. Like, he is at heart. Yes. He is a little teddy bear. He is a sweetie. And so watching him, like, love the people around him and love, like, he was leading a small group at the time, and just the way that those guys were always coming to him. And still to this day, those same group of guys after all these years are, like, always calling Michael because they know Michael will answer or they know Michael will come, and if they're in trouble, Michael will come help them. Like, Michael genuinely would do anything for anybody. And that's one of my favorite things about him. And as I was starting to get, get to know him at the time, I was like, am I like that? Like, it was inspiring me to be.

[Host]

Someone you want to be better?

[Chitima]

I want to be better. I want to be someone that people can rely on. And I, I, I want to have that mentality of, like, I would drop anything to, to help a friend or to help anybody.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Chitima]

You know, and he's like, that still rings true today in our, like, all the time. Like, he'll, it'll be 10:30, and he'll be like, hey, I'm going to go talk to so and so for a while. I might not come to bed for a little bit. And I, like, I'll tease him, but it, it's so admirable. Like, it's beautiful that, like, people know that, you know, and the guys that he leads know that, you know, Michael would do anything for me, and Michael would do anything for me, which, you know what I mean? It's beautiful. And so there are so many things about him that's just one thing, honestly. So many things about him that I'm like, man, I want to be a better person. Like, I, I want to be more like that. Because you are trying to be like Jesus, ultimately, you know, that's the goal of all of us as believers. And so, yeah, he inspires me a lot.

[Host]

It's cool. I love that so much. Have you seen that TikTok trend? It's really funny. But I have a point in saying this, I promise, but it's like the guys, like, call each other and tell each other good night.

[Chitima]

Yes.

[Host]

I'm trying to get him to do it.

[Melody]

Yes.

[Host]

I told Christian. I was like, I feel like if you did that, no one would think anything about it because he's like that. He calls his friends all the time. They talk all the time. Like, they all, like, they have such a sweet relationship. Even last night he was like, I call my friend. I was like, okay, can you take Haven with you? Like, just go drive around in the buggy or something while you talk. He's like, no, because I really need to be focused because I'm talking to him about something he's walking through. I was like, awesome. Like, I love that. You know, like, he's so intentional with his friends that I was like, I think if he calls him and said you're calling and telling him good night, I think they'd be like, thanks, man.

[Chitima]

Good night. Yeah.

[Host]

It is so funny. But that's so true. And like, same for Christian. He's like sarcastic and dry and his humor is like that. But then also last night, he was literally, he. He might kill me for saying this, but I was like, this is the side of you no one knows. He was looking at a picture of him and honey holding hands from yesterday and he started crying. He's like, she's getting older and I just love her so much. Like, but like, he is the most tender hearted.

[Chitima]

Tender.

[Host]

The way he loves me and the way he loves her girls is unlike love he has for other people. So I can see sometimes people are like, what is like, it's from the love of the Lord. And he has that for his friends and he does. So it's like, yes, it's so special to get to know someone on that level and, like, be so inspired by who they are. And that's the thing when people say, like, do I have to marry a Christian? You know, when people are like, believers, like, do I have to marry someone who's Christian? I'm like, man, you. You don't want to not.

[Chitima]

You don't want someone.

[Host]

Because why would you not want to marry someone who's pursuing Christ? You know, because if they're pursuing Christ, they're going to be more Christlike. And then in your relationship, you get to have a relationship that resembles Christ. Love, peace, joy, patience, kindness, like all these things, you don't want to miss out on that. So do you have to? I don't even know how to answer that question. It's like, why would you not want to and desire that? Man, this has been so fun. Mel, just as we begin to close, you want to just encourage our listeners because like I said, there's so many people leaning in, just wanting to learn about relationships, wanting to learn about singleness. We just encourage the girls right where they're at and whatever encouragement you have for Them?

[Melody]

Gosh. Well, I mean, just even, like, what you were just saying, it's like, do you have to marry a Christian? You know, I would want to. Like, the reality is that relationships are hard. Like, whether it's a romantic relationship, a friendship, like, any of it. Like, relationships are hard, but we're made for community. Like, you look at who God is, the Trinity, like, Father, Son, Holy Spirit, like, we. We serve a trinitarian, like, communal God. And so there's just so much opportunity to grow to. To just to lean into that, like, whether you're single or whether you're married. And it's like, the only way, like, I know this, even being married four weeks, the only way, like, I am able to love Jay and to love my husband is if I am first, like, accepting and receiving the love of Jesus. And, like, we have that relationship. Like, that is the only way I'm going to have love, joy, peace, patience, kindness for, like, for our relationship. But that's not just true with, like, my relationship with Jay. It's, like, true with my relations with anyone. Like, with anyone. And so it's like, abide with Jesus and just let that be the overflow of every other relationship that you have. And you don't have to wait until you're married. You don't have to wait. Like, just learn, practice. Like, that's all relationships. That's just life. That's just enjoy living in community. Don't shy away from being vulnerable and being real and being, you know, like, with people. But just, like, know that there's opportunity to be fully who God has created you to be. Single, married, any of that. Like, and there's opportunities just to lean in. But you have to stay connected to Jesus and you have to be rooted in that. And then hopefully one day you'll look up. And I love, like, Ben Stewart. I love the way he talks about it. He's like, one day, hopefully you'll look up and you're running towards Jesus and you look to the side and be like, oh, there's somebody else that's, like, running right there. And we're running after the same thing. And we're pursu. Like, we're pursuing Jesus together, and we decide, oh, man, it would be fun to do this. Like, life together.

[Host]

So true. I love that so much. I love when Ben says that. I had a dream. A dream one time, like, an actual dream when I was asleep, not, like a daydream. Yeah, I literally had a dream, me and Christian, and we were, like, running and we kept jumping over like. Like mountains. Like, we were literally, like. It was. It was the craziest picture and the craziest dream, and it has stuck with me, and it was very detailed. I won't go into all the details.

[Melody]

Yeah.

[Host]

But I remember one thing that, like, struck me was that we were running same speed, and we were jumping over all these impossible hurdles together. And it was like, this is my person, you know? And I feel like God will give you that vision. It might not be in a dream, but it might be in a daydream. It might just be a vision of the person you see. Oh, man. We're running together, you know, and, like, all these things we face that are going to be hard, like, the Lord is going to help us overcome them. Yes. And it's so beautiful. That's what relationship is. And so, y' all, this has been so fun. I truly could keep chatting forever. And I feel like everyone listening, he's going to be like, why did you not ask?

[Chitima]

Worship leading.

[Host]

And. Okay, we'll have him back. We can't chill. We'll have him back. Because we could have a whole another podcast and a half about that, too. You guys are so filled with wisdom and fun, and it's just fun to get to know you all more on a personal level. So thanks for coming on and being the greatest.

[Melody]

So fun. We love it.

[Chitima]

The best. The best.

[Host]

So good.

[Melody]

Sam.