Julia Gets Wise with Nancy Pelosi

Summary

Wiser Than Me with Julia Louis-Dreyfus: Episode Summary – "Julia Gets Wise with Nancy Pelosi"

Episode Information

• Title: Julia Gets Wise with Nancy Pelosi
• Release Date: December 18, 2024
• Host: Julia Louis-Dreyfus
• Guest: Nancy Pelosi, Speaker Emerita of the House of Representatives

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Introduction

In the season finale of Season 3 of Wiser Than Me™, Julia Louis-Dreyfus sits down with one of the most influential women in American politics, Speaker Emerita Nancy Pelosi. This compelling episode delves deep into Pelosi's extensive career, her unwavering commitment to women's empowerment, and the personal philosophies that have guided her through decades of public service. Listeners are treated to an intimate conversation that oscillates between personal anecdotes, political insights, and heartfelt advice.

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Background of Nancy Pelosi

Nancy Pelosi, the first and only female Speaker of the House, is celebrated as one of the most effective legislative leaders in modern American history. She began her political journey later in life, running for office at 47 years old, and has since championed numerous pivotal legislations, including the Affordable Care Act. Pelosi's upbringing in a politically active family, with her father Tommy D'Alessandro Jr. serving as a Democratic congressman and mayor of Baltimore, laid the foundation for her illustrious career.

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Women in Leadership and Education

A significant portion of the conversation centers on the impact of all-girls education and the broader theme of women in leadership roles. Julia reflects on her own experiences in an all-girls school, highlighting how environments that foster female leadership contribute to the success of women in various fields.

Notable Quote:

"When women lead, everyone benefits, men included. It's good for everybody." – Nancy Pelosi [09:30]

Pelosi reinforces this by discussing the importance of an even playing field and the need for women to be at the forefront of leadership to drive societal progress.

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Legislative Achievements and Challenges

Pelosi provides an in-depth look at her role in passing the Affordable Care Act, underscoring the strategic combination of inside maneuvering and outside mobilization. She emphasizes the critical role of grassroots movements and public support in overcoming legislative obstacles.

Notable Quote:

"Any legislation, any political goal that I set out for is always about the outside mobilization... those people out there make it happen." – Nancy Pelosi [20:17]

She candidly discusses the opposition faced, particularly from Republican adversaries, and the resilience required to push forward transformative policies.

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Navigating Political Toxicity

The episode doesn't shy away from the increasingly toxic nature of modern political discourse. Pelosi shares her experiences with relentless vitriol and obstructionism, stressing the importance of maintaining public sentiment and fostering respectful dialogue.

Notable Quote:

"This isn't mutual. It is instigated by them. And that's who they are and where they are." – Nancy Pelosi [57:51]

Julia and Pelosi explore the roots of political toxicity, debating whether it's possible to reclaim respectful and productive public discourse.

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Advice for Women: Knowing Your Power and "Why"

A recurring theme is the empowerment of women through self-awareness and purpose. Pelosi offers sage advice on understanding one’s strengths, knowing one’s "why," and being prepared to seize opportunities when they arise.

Notable Quote:

"Know your why. Know your strength. Be you." – Nancy Pelosi [30:59]

She encourages women to embrace their unique qualities and remain steadfast in their endeavors, serving as a beacon of inspiration for listeners.

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Personal Anecdotes and Family Influence

The conversation takes a personal turn as Pelosi shares stories about her mother, Judith, and the profound influence she had on her values and dedication to public service. Julia relates by discussing her own upbringing and the lasting impact of her family on her career and personal growth.

Notable Quote:

"I couldn’t understand why it never happened before or since. Everyone was standing on the shoulders of the suffragettes." – Nancy Pelosi [48:19]

This segment highlights the intergenerational transmission of wisdom and the enduring legacy of strong female figures.

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Balancing Career and Marriage

Pelosi opens up about the dynamics of her long marriage to her husband, Paul, and how they navigated the demands of her political career alongside raising five children. She humorously addresses the challenges and mutual support that have sustained their relationship.

Notable Quote:

"When you're taking inventory of your accomplishments, give yourself a gold star for being a mom." – Nancy Pelosi [51:38]

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Insights on Aging and Responsibility

As the conversation nears its conclusion, Pelosi reflects on aging, emphasizing that it should be embraced with joy. She underscores the responsibility that comes with experience and the importance of contributing meaningfully to future generations.

Notable Quote:

"Aging is something that has to be embraced. It can really be a joy for me." – Nancy Pelosi [61:10]

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Conclusion

The episode wraps up with heartfelt interactions between Julia and her mother, Judith, who joins the conversation via Zoom. They celebrate the wisdom shared and the importance of listening to the older generation. Julia muses on discovering her own "why," inspired by the profound insights from Pelosi.

Key Takeaways:

• The critical role of women in leadership positions for societal advancement.
• The blend of strategic maneuvering and public mobilization in achieving legislative success.
• The necessity of resilience in the face of political toxicity.
• Empowering women through self-awareness, purpose, and preparedness.
• The enduring influence of family and generational wisdom in personal and professional development.

Notable Quote:

"Hope is sitting where it always has been. Right between faith and charity." – Nancy Pelosi [59:31]

This episode serves as a powerful testament to the strength, resilience, and wisdom of women leaders, offering listeners both inspiration and practical advice to navigate their own paths.

Transcript

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Well, hello there, it's me, Julia Louis Dreyfus. I'm so happy to be back with season three of Wiser Than Me and to celebrate that, I am so excited to share that we have partnered with Lingua Franca, a New York City based luxury and sustainable clothing brand to offer our listeners Wiser Than Me specific hand embroidered sweaters, sweatshirts and more. I've gotten to hand select each each of the items in this curated collection and have had so much fun with it along the way, adding a bunch of sayings from our podcast to the items. It all combines Lingua Franca's chic yet thoughtful designs with our mission to celebrate the wisdom of older women. So check out our collection by heading over to wiser than me shop.com and clicking on the Lingua Franca collection.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Lemonada.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

It'S hilarious to me how often a conversation with somebody in their 50s or 60s or even 70s will start with the words well, when I was in high school, we never get over high school, do we? Seriously. I mean, as my own kids get older, I see constant proof for good or ill, that these high school years are critical and formative. All our sons attended one school from kindergarten through high school graduation, a very progressive co ed school in Santa Monica, California that was so liberal that my husband affectionately refers to it still as Sandinista Tech. My high school was so different, but just as foundational. My high school and elementary school was a private all girls school. I went there for 10 years and then, my God, my father, I do not know why he wanted me to go to an all girls college which I definitely did not want to do. He absolutely insisted that we go tour Wellesley College. So we did. And we ended up having this huge fight about the school while walking across the quad and all of a sudden a bee flies up my skirt and stings me on the ass. This is a true story. You gu. No kidding. And I started screaming in front of the whole tour group like a crazy person. The good news is I didn't have to go on the rest of the tour. So that was excellent. But anyway, back to my all girls high school. My school has a roster of wildly successful female alums. And maybe that's because at a school like mine, everyone who is the captain of a team or the star of a play, or president of the class or the valedictorian or, or whatever is a woman. And when you look at lists of successful women, CEOs, members of Congress, musicians, journalists, the percentage that went to all girls schools is kind of stunning. I mean, everybody from Pink to Michigan Senator Alyssa Slotkin to Ambassador Susan Rice and Melinda Gates to, I don't know, the wicked witch of the West, Margaret Hamilton. Yes, it's true. They all went to all girls schools. So am I making a pitch for all girls education? Well, no, not exactly. I'm making a pitch for putting women in charge. It's a pitch for an even playing field. Because I bet the powerful and successful women who did not go to all girls schools were also at some point in positions where their leadership was allowed, or maybe they powerfully insisted it be allowed to flourish. Success followed. Of course, not everyone is a leader, obviously, but when women lead, everyone benefits, men included. It's good for everybody. At my all girls high school, which was far from perfect. It had its own stupid rules and prejudices and very conservative ideology. My experience of seeing women lead without apology, myself included, by the way, instilled in me an expectation of female leadership. A normalization, that's the word. That was just how it was and it was wonderful. And then out in the real world, my classmates and I just expected to be taken seriously. And when we weren't, we would put up a hell of a fight. I mean, if I've learned one thing from wiser than me, it is that the women we have been so honored to talk to from every walk of life, they know how to put up one hell of a fight. They know how to lead. They have, every one of them, earned our deep, deep respect. So as I've said many times, listen to old women motherfuckers. And we're just scratching the surface of each of these individuals life story, the tons and tons of wisdom they can pass along to us. What a loss it has been for our country, our culture, to not hear from all of the women with brilliant ideas and tons of talent and genius, the women who have been kept from leadership, from flourishing by stupid rules, by what is now almost laughingly called the patriarchy. Well fellas, you're lost because women in leadership roles, well, I mean, Obviously we're not 100% fabulous, I'll grant you that. I mean, you do get your occasional insanely crappy congresswoman, your idio female pundit. We're not batting a thousand, but we're batting in the high four hundreds. And even Ted Williams never did that. Well, how perfect then that we talk today on the last show of the season to a fellow all girls high school graduate and one of the greatest female leaders of our time, maybe even the greatest female leader of our time, Speaker Emerita Nancy Pelosi. I'm Julia Louis Dreyfus, and this is Wiser Than Me, the podcast where I get schooled by women who are wiser than me. Hey, folks, before we begin, we wanted to let you know that this episode was recorded before Speaker Pelosi's recent accident in Luxembourg. We are keeping her in our thoughts and sending our love for a smooth and speedy recovery. It is an axiom, an undisputed truth, that in the developing world, the fastest, most effective way to bring a village, a province, a nation out of poverty, to reduce disease, crime and violence, is to empower women. But right here in our own rich, supposedly sophisticated nation, we're too stupid to apply that same axiom. We need more women in positions of power. And of course, I'm not saying men should stay away from politics. I mean, we've had 45 male presidents and almost two and a half of them were great presidents. And one of those wasn't even named Washington or Lincoln. I'll let you guess who that was. I'm just saying, if you want to get stuff done, hire women, elect women. Case in point, Nancy Pelosi. The first and only female speaker of the House, and arguably, and I'm going to make the argument, the most effective speaker and leader in a century. Nancy Pelosi didn't run for public office until she was 47 years old. Can you believe what I am saying? And think of what she has done. Always a fierce advocate for the unseen, unseen and unheard. Starting with the AIDS Crisis in the 80s through the Affordable Care act, which she, through her magical political jiu jitsu, somehow worked through Congress and now insures millions of Americans. Her stupendous tenacity has led her to become the most powerful woman in the Western world. It is no surprise that Nancy Pelosi grew up in a family that lived and breathed politics. Her dad, Tommy D'Alessandro Jr. Wasn't just a visionary Democratic congressman. He also a great dancer and the mayor of Baltimore. Her mom, Big Nancy, I love that name, was a whip smart, strategist, inventor, and I'm guessing, guessing, possibly the brains behind her husband and Nancy. She was little Nancy, the shy youngest of six children and of course, the only girl. When Nancy became a public servant, she showed us what tough, unwavering, principled persistence looks like. She leads with agility and ferocity and does it while taking, taking zero crap. My God, the threats and real violence she has had to put up with throughout her career. The classless, insipid, dangerous way that the people who are taking power right now think they can talk about this great woman. I don't know how she perseveres. So let's find out. I can't wait to talk to someone who I have been so truly lucky to work with on so many issues important to me and to her, and who is simply one of the smartest, wisest, most fascinating people will ever have the privilege of talking with on our show. My God. I am deeply honored to welcome a mother, a grandmother, a person of faith, the speaker of the House, emerita, the voice of the Democratic Party, a real deadhead, and a woman who is completely and utterly wiser than me. Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi. Welcome, Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Thank you, Julia. It is such a pleasure and an honor and a privilege to be with you. I bring the greetings of so many of your friends that they didn't know I was coming here, but I always volunteer. Isn't she the best? Oh, that's nice. And of course, in my own family. But just starting where you began, about the power of women to make a difference.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yes.

[Nancy Pelosi]

People would always ask me as speaker, because the speaker has awesome, awesome power. If you ruled the world, what one thing would you do? And I always say the same thing. The education of women and girls, period. It's a complete difference to us. The person, the family, the community, the society. The country.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

The country.

[Nancy Pelosi]

So. And our expression here, and I think it applies every place, is, when women succeed, America succeeds.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

That's right.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And the same to others as well.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I want to just ask you some silly questions at the very top, if I may.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Please.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Are you comfortable if I ask you your real age?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Yeah.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

What is it?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, when you're in politics, everybody knows your age, which is okay with me, but not always okay with my classmates, mates.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

How. How old are you?

[Nancy Pelosi]

84.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

84. And how old do you feel?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Oh, I. I feel I. I don't have any sense of age. I. I feel. You don't know. I eat a lot of chocolate ice cream. Very dark.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yes.

[Nancy Pelosi]

I, you know, do things like that. That just like that.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Young girls do, too. By the way, we have chocolate here for you because we heard you were a bit of a chocoholic.

[Nancy Pelosi]

So that's what it is.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yes, we have that in common. By the way, what's the best part, do you think about being your age? May I call you Nancy? Is that all right?

[Nancy Pelosi]

No, let's do that. I prefer that to any title, actually. I love sounding my own name to a few of Yours?

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Sure.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Julia, I don't know. Experience teaches you a lot of things. Your own. Not only experience in terms of getting a job done, but the experiences that you have had. The joy of your family, the sense of satisfaction of working with other people. And so. So it is. I don't ever remember feeling older. Yeah, I know. I don't feel that way.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I know what you mean. Well, of course. You're so vibrant. You're doing everything all the time. So I can understand. You just have more experience under your belt. Right?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Yeah. And I don't have enough hours in the day. That's my own problem. Regret. It's not a regret. It's just a comment. I wish there were more hours in the day because there are more things I wanna do, but it's time to go to sleep at some point.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

What about. Are you wearing heels right now?

[Nancy Pelosi]

No. No, I just got off the plane, so I'm wearing boots.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

You're wearing boots with heels, though.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Yeah.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

You know, it's funny. Cause when I was doing this show called Veep, that was. In which I played the vice president and then the president, and I was always in heels. Like the heels that you often wear.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Stilettos? Mm.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah. And we made a whole thing of me taking off my shoes once I got into the. Back into my office and being barefoot. Do you take your shoes off when you're working?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Not so much. Not so much.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

My God. These heels don't bother your back?

[Nancy Pelosi]

No. Well, see, most of the shoes I have are suede, and they're like bedroom slippers to me. They're very soft.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Oh, that's nice.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And I don't. I'm not in my office long enough to take off my shoes. You know, touch base, do whatever it is. And out the door and out the door again.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

What about food? I mean, I know you eat chocolate ice cream, but, like, when you're at work. When you're at work. And do they have good food on Capitol Hill? Like at the house there. Is there any good food?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, that's a matter of opinion. Some people think they don't have any good food at all.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Right.

[Nancy Pelosi]

I myself have never been offended by a good hot dog. And they have hot dogs that are pretty good. A lot of hot dogs. So they say, chocolate ice cream for breakfast, hot dog for lunch. This is not a good.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

You are blowing my mind. I have to tell you. I was once in the. I had the great pleasure of having lunch with then Vice President Biden in his office. And I was really nervous because I'D never been, you know, hanging out with a. Like that, with a vice president before.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Even though you had served as vice president and president.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

That's right. But I was. When it came to the real thing, I was anxious and we sat down to eat and he starts to order and I didn't have any appetite. Cause I was so nervous. And I said, oh, I'll just have a salad. And he says, I'll have that salad. And he goes, oh, no. He goes, just bring her the crab cakes too. And the next thing I know, I've got this huge plate of crab cakes and this massive salad and I could barely eat a thing. I'm sure he. Anyway, whatever. But the crab. But I did have a. Buy the crab cakes. They're pretty good. At least the White House crab cakes were good.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Yeah, that's a different story. Well, we're near Maryland and crab cakes are part of our staples. I know, coming from Maryland.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Totally, totally. You graduated from the Institute of Notre Dame. It was an all girls Catholic high school in Baltimore, right?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Yes.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

By the way, I went to an all girls school too in Bethesda, Maryland. And I have to say there was a huge benefit to going to an all girls school. Did you like going to an all girls school? I kind of loved it.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, see, you're so much younger. For me, there was no other option. I loved it, yes, but it wasn't even a consideration.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Right.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And then when I was going to college, my parents were very much like, you will go to an all women's, all girls college. Catholic, not too. So I went to Trinity College in Washington, D.C. yes, 45 minutes from home. But it was. It was wonderful.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah.

[Nancy Pelosi]

I wonder now, looking back, if I had real choice, but I loved it at the time and.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

And what kind of girl were you in high school? Were you a leader in high school or were you.

[Nancy Pelosi]

No.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

You weren't?

[Nancy Pelosi]

No, I mean, I. Well, I was a. I was a student and I.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

You mean you were a good student? You studied?

[Nancy Pelosi]

I studied, but I have always kind of been into music. I was Elvis all the way when I was in high school. You know, it was Elvis Presley and people. When I was at one of the conventions a few years ago, the reporter said to me, do you ever try to influence the music that your children or grandchildren listen to? And I said, absolutely, positively not. For example, when I was a teenager, Elvis Presley came on the scene. He was King, right? He was King. And you don't know this because they were young, but he was very different from the music that went because of the nibbling hips and the blah, blah, blah. And I thought if my parents ever said I wouldn't even paid attention to them, it would be ridiculous. So, no, I don't want to stand in the way of anybody's freedom of choice of the music.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

So, you know, by the way, just a little bit of gossip. We had Rita Moreno on this podcast.

[Nancy Pelosi]

She's wonderful.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

She's wonderful. Did you know that she dated Elvis Presley and she said he was kind of boring?

[Nancy Pelosi]

I've seen a long list of people that she has.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yes, she has a long list of.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Guys that she's a long list. And she's so absolutely wonderful.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

She is wonderful.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And she, again, is talented. When we're talking about music and that, we dance. We dance around the clock and all this.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

You're a Deadhead.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, that came much later.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I know, but I mean that. I have to say, that was a shock for me to hear that. I think that's amazing.

[Nancy Pelosi]

One of the things that I love is that some years after, say, into the 90s, I saw this purse. I said, yeah, I haven't seen that purse in a long time. So took it off the shelf, and in it, say, maybe the beginning of the 2000s, there was a button that said, deadheads for Dukakis. Like, 20 years later, Deadheads for Dukakis.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Oh, I hope he saved that.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Yeah, I just don't know where it is right now.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Oh, you gotta find it. That's really good. That's so retro. It sort of.

[Nancy Pelosi]

But when you think of. It was a political statement.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Of course it was. How do you blow off steam?

[Nancy Pelosi]

I do crossword puzzles. I have been doing them forever, and I find that my zone. You know, when I'm doing the puzzle and somebody comes up to me, I'm like, ah, it scared me. I was in my zone. So, yeah, I'll do that. I do. I love any form of entertainment, live or movies or whatever it is. And my husband, Paul, he loves every form of music. In any given week, we'll be with the Grateful Dead, Cyndi Lauper, or the symphony, the opera or the ballet, you know, or the one. Or the movies. I think the arts. The reason I say that, I think the arts are gonna be our salvation. You know that, because you're a master of this. But this is one place where people come together, whatever their differences. They enjoy a painting of a symphony, a movie, a play, whatever it is, and they forget their differences, even for a short period of time. They realize they have some common ground. They've laughed together, they've cried, they have been inspired together. And that's a start.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah, it is a start.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And that's a start. And it is really one source of hope to me. Are the arts.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah. Yes.

[Nancy Pelosi]

President Lincoln such an inspiration. Notice I mentioned a Republican president.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yes, I do. Good for you.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Reaching across the aisle, he said, public sentiment is everything. With it, you can accomplish almost anything. Without it, practically nothing. You mentioned the Affordable Care Act. It was such a triumph.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yes.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And that was inside maneuvering. Yes. But the outside mobilization, having all the people who wanted that to happen, to be mobilizing in elections, the door to door and the technology reaching out to people, it's all about the outside. So any legislation, any political goal that I set out for is always about the outside mobilization, the VIPs, the volunteers in politics, the very important people are those people out there, whether they're individuals who want to help or whether they're part of a group, a diagnosis group, or this or that, they make it happen. And so that's kind of where I think first, how will the people embrace what we're trying to do? And how do we use all of our energy to engage them in this?

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

So you hit an obstacle, you know, like, well, the Affordable Care Act. That was hard one, was it not? I mean, and you launched a campaign across the country to get the word out about the Affordable Care Act. Right. To have people tell their personal stories. Were there other examples of that kind of leadership that you did, Nancy, before the Affordable Care act, to get legislation done?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, I always say that, and this wasn't my initiation, but something that I worked with, yes, Is the fight against hiv. When I first came to Congress, they were the first words I uttered on Congress. I know here to fight against HLB and aids. And I pay tribute to those fighting, largely LGBTQ community, but others who were involved in that, and I thank them for their patriotism because it was a harder fight. You know, it was a tough fight to do the Affordable Care Act. But in this case, we had to fight discrimination in addition to fighting for resources and the rest. Yes, of course. And you're never always teaching, you're always learning. And we learned a lot from the anti HIV AIDS community about that outside mobilization. And I think what they did at that time to help us with the funding for care prevention and research, plus trying to end discrimination, were lesson to others and other diagnoses and all the rest. Breast cancer and the rest, we all learned about that from them, and they learned from us about how it would work, work for us to be successful. And we were. But on the Affordable Care act, for example, though we were on our path, it was a challenging thing because there were those who were anti government, they don't want a government role. There were those who just were the special interests, the insurance companies, the pharmaceutical companies, the rest of that. So when we sadly lost Ted Kennedy, when he passed away, the press said to me at the next press conference, well, it's over for you because a Republican has been elected in his place. You no longer have 60 votes. So when they said, so, that's the end, right? I said, no. We realize that having access to affordable, quality healthcare is a challenge of a generation. For 100 years, presidents have tried to do this, starting with another Republican president, Teddy Roosevelt. Teddy Roosevelt, yeah. He tried over the years and they didn't. Now we have that opportunity under the leadership of President Obama and the Democratic. We're going to succeed and we will not let anything stand in our way. If there's an obstacle there, we will push open the gate. If that doesn't work, we'll climb the fence. If that doesn't work, we'll pole vault in. If that doesn't work, we will helicopter in. But we're not letting anything stand in the way.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

There's much more with Nancy Pelosi in just a moment. Stay right where you are. This show is sponsored by Liquid iv. Between traveling, hosting big gatherings and keeping your family sane, there's always a lot going on. This time of year. When life gets that hectic, taking care of yourself and staying hydrated tends to fall off the radar. Sometimes you can go hours without realizing you haven't had a sip of water. Unless of course, you're actively thirsty and then your whole body starts to stage a protest. Keep up with everything on your plate this holiday season while staying hydrated with Liquid iv. With their hydration multiplier or the sugar free hydration multiplier, you get eight vitamins and nutrients, three times the electrolytes of the leading sports drink, and no artificial sweeteners. It's hydration that works as hard as you do. Liquid IV has a flavor for everyone from raspberry melon and white peach to sugar free green grape. And the best part? It's more than just a drink. Their hydro science formula is designed to hydrate you better than water alone. And yes, it's non gmo, vegan, gluten free, dairy free and soy free so you can feel good about what you're putting in your body. Tear, pour live more Stay hydrated through the holidays with Liquid IV. Get 20% off your first order of Liquid IV when you go to liquidiv.com and use code wiser at checkout. That's 20% off your first first order when you shop Better hydration today using promo code [e-mail] so many of the women on the show talk about their health routines and the things they've done to keep them feeling good even at 80 or 90 years old. And they all talk about small, consistent steps that accumulate over time. So if you're looking for a way to stay consistent with your health in the new year, Symbiotica's supplements make it so easy. Symbiotica is all about high quality ingredients and transparency. No seed oils, preservatives, toxins, artificial additives. Just the good stuff your body craves. They use the most advanced liposomal absorption technology which ensures you get the most nutrients out of your supplements and you can feel the results. You can shop by benefit and there's so many delicious flavors like vanilla cream, magnesium. It's like a little dessert before bed with benefits. It helps so much with sleep, focus and memory. Memory. It's so great to feel confident during the winter and going into the new year knowing their immunity products are helping shield you from colds and flus. High quality holistic health right at your fingertips. Be present and feel your best for life's most memorable moments. Go to symbiotica.com wiser for 20% off your order plus free shipping today. That's symbiotica.com wiser for twenty percent off your order plus free shipping today. Today. I know we're all so excited to find the perfect gifts for the people we love. There's nothing like seeing your adult child light up because you finally nailed it and surprised them with exactly what they wanted. Macy's Friends and Family Sale is here to help make that magic happen. From December 4th through December 12th, take an extra 30% off top gifts and 15% off the best beauty brands they've got something for everyone. Ugg boots, Advent calendars, Nest candles, Crocs. Crocs. Who knew those were going to be such a big hit? They also have these incredible dry bar travel kits, skin gym LED masks and stocking stuffers galore. With the holidays right around the corner, now is the time to dig into your holiday shopping and find those perfect gifts for your loved ones. And for a great price too. All at the Macy's Friends and Family Sale. Don't miss out on Macy's biggest Offer of the season. Save big and enjoy. Free shipping on orders over $25. Whether you're shopping for loved ones or treating yourself, now's the time to snag those perfect holiday finds. With deals this good, why wait? Visit Macy's.com and make this holiday season the easiest and most stylish one yet. After the 2016 election, you described Hillary's loss as actually physical, like a mule kicking you in the back, which, by the way, I think is very apt. I felt the same way. Many of us now are still feeling a. Maybe even a bigger sting, a bigger kick. Can you give us some advice, Nancy, about how we move through our feelings of not just disappointment, maybe even despair? I know you talk about, you say, don't agonize, organize, which I love, love, love. Are you taking your own advice right now?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, it's very hard, I have to say. Every morning when I awaken, I think, did that really happen? Oh, it did. But I see everything, Julia, as an opportunity.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Right?

[Nancy Pelosi]

It's an opportunity. Now, there are better opportunities, I'll grant you, but nonetheless, it's all an opportunity. And just as an example, from 2016. Yes, right. Within 36 hours of that election, we formed our initiative to save the Affordable Care Act. This new president elect has said, obamacare sucks. Forgive my language, but I'm just quoting.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

No, I know you're quoting, but also, you can say whatever you want to me.

[Nancy Pelosi]

We, again, within 36 hours of this election, this November, initiated our healthcare to save the Affordable Care Act. It's a health issue, of course. It's a financial health issue, too. For people at their kitchen table to know they're gonna be able to afford healthcare, their prescription drugs, insurance, and the rest of that. And we will be launching much of it as we did in 17 now in 25. So we will do that again. And it is even more so because Affordable Care act is even more popular than it was then.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

By the way, congratulations. You won your seat again. No surprise. But that's so fabulous. And in an interview, you said, I'm confident in my ability to lead because I know my strengths. So my question is, what are your strengths? What do you see your strengths as being?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, first of all, despite being attacked by them here, there, and every from the right, from the left, and every other place, I had over a quarter of a million votes, and that was a big deal. Most have been in California, but I don't know, in the rest of the country, I haven't looked. But what I say to people is to know Their strengths. To know their power. The power of you, Julia.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Know your power.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Know your power. That's the thing. And the power of what you bring to the table. But if you're going to be in this arena, you have to know your why. Because this is not for the faint of heart. If you want to be running for office or striving for something, position in whatever field you're in, if it's a competition for power in any way, you will be a target.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Have you always known your power?

[Nancy Pelosi]

See, I never really thought about running for office. Never. Never thought about it. I mean, I'm a shy person. Really?

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah. You don't give off shy right now.

[Nancy Pelosi]

That's why I was before. I loved public service. I was taught that when we were children, we were all taught public service is a noble calling. Politics is a piece of that. And so I was chair of the California Democratic Party, which I thought was the biggest honor I could ever have. The biggest, because it was.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

It was so critical.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Huge. And then woman was. Here I was. And I go to these meetings. I'm the chair of the biggest party in the country and this and that. But I was behind the scenes promoting the agenda at the candidates, the campaigns of the Democrats, especially the candidates. But I never thought of myself as being center stage. So that when you ask that question, it wasn't that. I know my power. I knew my why. I knew why I was doing what that was. And I always say to people, know your why. If you know your why, you can take all the slings and arrows they want to send your way because you know why you're doing this, right? My why is a 1 in 5 children in America who lives in poverty and goes to sleep hungry at night. That's what took me from housewife House member to House speaker, knowing that. So when people want to be involved, I'll say, know your power. Know your strengths. And they are manifold. Even if you're not thinking that they are, understand that they are. Know the power of you. The only person in the history of the world like you. So know. Be you. The authenticity of you is what is a strength. You may admire other people want to be like or be mentored by us all good. But be you, okay? Know your power. Be you. And then when the opportunity presents itself, and you never know when you'll be.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Ready, you do say in your book, lead by Instinct, that you have to trust your judgment and have the confidence to act when the moment demands. So here I have a question about that. I have a question about the use of strategy versus intuition, instinct. Right. Because a couple of moments, for example, when the former president, the president elect, when he made that speech, that State of the Union, and you tore up the speech, had you read the speech before and did you think, I'm gonna tear it up? Or that was an instinct that you had the intuition to do it in that moment?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, let me clarify what we're saying here. First of all, in answer to that question, yes. No. What happened was he came in, it was very disrespectful of the Congress, and he talked politics. This is about policy. It's about governance. So on the first page, I thought, oh, he's not telling the truth there. So I make a notch. Wherever he wasn't, paint a tear. The next page, the next page, the next page, the next page. So I would make a tear every place that I thought he was not telling the truth. And so I realized as we were getting into the speech, that was every page. It was every page. It was horrible. It was a manifesto of misrepresentations, in my view. So at the end, I thought, I have to tear this up now. I thought my staff never. We've never discussed it under any circumstances. A completely different thing. So I thought, they're really going to be concerned because I haven't discussed this with anybody like that. I didn't even plan it until he gave this horrible speech. But I have received, of all the. In terms of passing Affordable Care, all kinds of proud legislation that we had passed to make a difference in people's lives. More people talk about tearing up the speech or pointing to him in the room or walking out of the White House. More people, they said, you took the words right out of my mouth when you tore up that speech. I mean, all over the world. Yeah, I know when I've traveled over the world, people will be like this. Really?

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Well, it was an iconic moment. And your gesture, it was like. Talk about blowing off steam. It was a huge relief to see you do that. It was like, oh, there's a sane person reacting sanely to insanity.

[Nancy Pelosi]

But it was sad.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

It was respect.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Now, getting back to your point, though, about instinct and all of that, what I do talk about in my book, and I want women to take real pride in for themselves, is that women have an intuition. We used to call it women's intuition way back when in the day. But there's an intuition. If you're.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

By the way, there's no male intuition, you'll notice that that's not a phrase.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Never Was, never was, never will be. So when you're a member of Congress, you act in a deductive way. You have hearings, you have public comment. So when you're there to go vote, it's not like you have to vote in a man. You've had time to absorb and learn and exchange ideas and this or that, or just be further reinforced in your point of view, in terms of your vision and your values. Yes, but when you're an executive, for example, a speaker is an executive, Right. Some things happen that are not about a vote on the floor. They're just something that happens that requires action right away. If you're the president, the governor, the speaker, the mayor, you have to act right away. So you have to be prepared. You have to have knowledge. So when something happens, your intuition say, trust your gut. Don't trust your gut unless your gut has knowledge, has strategy, has values, knows what it wants to do.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Be prepared.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Be prepared and act. Act intuitively, not deductively intuitively. And the reason that's important is because, Julia, if you were going to make a decision, you thought, well, maybe this, maybe that, all the other people will exercise how to promote their own agenda, and pretty soon your idea is greatly diminished. If they know you're going to act, they'll respect that. And nine times out of 10, because you know, you know the subject, you know the strategy, you know the path, nine, ten out of ten, you'll be fine. And that's a good average.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

That's a really good average.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Yeah.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

9 out of 10. It's still an A.

[Nancy Pelosi]

But you make it happen.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah.

[Nancy Pelosi]

You make your decision happen.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah. It's time to take another break. We'll be right back with more wisdom from Nancy Paul Pelosi. We all have fitness goals, but it's another thing to stick to them until we see progress. Peloton makes it easy to keep up with your goals, no matter where you are or how your schedule looks. With a huge variety of classes, Peloton fits every stage and every moment. Whether you're welcoming a new chapter or just carving out a few moments for yourself. Whatever era you're in, holiday hustle, running season, or a new wellness journey, Peloton is ready. With the workouts and encouragement to keep you going. You can try barre, pilates, yoga, running, meditation, and so much more to discover what energizes you. Each class type is there to help you stay motivated and keep moving. Need flexibility? Peloton's all access membership means you can work out at home on your bike, tread or row. Or log into the app to squeeze in a workout out wherever you happen to be. Whether you're at a park, in a hotel, or even cheering on your kids from the sidelines. And if you're balancing a packed schedule, Peloton has you covered. Classes come in all lengths. Whether you have just 10 minutes or you're ready to dive into a 45 minute session, there's always something ready, on demand or live, whenever you need it. Find your push, find your power with [e-mail] hey, wiser than me listeners, it's Julia here with some very exciting news. We have teamed up with Katus, the California based maker of high quality custom eyewear, to bring you exclusive Wiser Than Me reader frames. How cool is that? I personally hand picked the frame, the color, and added a very special phrase engraved right on top. It says, get wise. Isn't that fabulous? So you can feel the wisdom flowing every time you wear them. So head to wiserthanmeshop.com and check out the Katis collection to grab yours. Now, I know you've said you characterized yourself as being shy when you were younger. Do you recall a moment when you first entered public service? Do you remember a time where you got pushed back and you had to really steel yourself and go, no, no.

[Nancy Pelosi]

No, I was ready. Really, I was ready. That's why I say be ready. Just be ready.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

And having children obviously prepared you for all of this, correct?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Yeah, yes, right. But see, that's why I say to women, know your power, know your why. Be ready. Be ready. Because you can't miss that opportunity. Now, if I go someplace and I don't have to speak, I'm as happy as I can be. You know what I mean? I mean, just relax. I went to a funeral service the other day and I was enjoying the what people were saying and I thought, oh, this is so lovely. And then they introduced me and I'm like, hey, nobody told me. But of course I couldn't. I had to get up and do.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Volumes that you can actually relax. And you were at a funeral.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Oh my God, no. And then they introduced and I thought, who is he introducing? That sounds like me. Oh, my God, it is.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Did you have to speak or could you just wave?

[Nancy Pelosi]

No, I had to then get, oh, no. But I knew the subject very well. It didn't bother me at all. But just be ready. It is funny because you are in the attraction business. You're in the entertainment business, the attraction business. We in politics like to think that we are in the attraction business. But we really aren't that good at that.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

But you kind of are.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, we would like to think that we are, but it is. We're not professionals. On the attraction side of it.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Well, I would say. See, this is why I liked so much playing Selina Meyer on Beat, because. And why I think I could tap into it, because there are parallels. You know, you have to stay relevant. You have to keep getting elected. You have to, as an actor, keep getting jobs. And you need to be electable. And the parallels kind of run deep. You're a brand. There's a brand of you that you're selling.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Right, exactly. And you experience that in that role as to what it took as that person, as the beep and the president to do that. And you were experienced because that's what you do.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

You said that if your mother, Big Nancy, which is the greatest name ever, you said, if she lived in my generation or my daughter's generations, my goodness. Lord knows what she would have been able to accomplish because she was an inventor. She held a number of patents, which is extraordinary. One for esteemed facial machine. Can you talk about her and her influence in your life?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, I would say about her, as I would say of any of the women of her generation, that they were early. You know, in other words, if they were now, for example, my children or grandchildren, still, they could take over the world.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Right.

[Nancy Pelosi]

It really.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

What did she do for your dad as a.

[Nancy Pelosi]

What was she doing behind the scenes? Volunteers in politics, the mobilization piece.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yes. Yes.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And it was interesting to me because they were. Well, we lived in the Italian section of Baltimore, and it was very Democratic. And the rest. As time went by, though, when you see along comes George McGovern, and I loved telling him this story. Along comes George McGovern. Well, they were progressive, but he was, you know, much more so.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I loved George McGovern.

[Nancy Pelosi]

It was wonderful. And I said, you know, I've never been prouder of my parents in politics is when they just went all out for George McGovern.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I remember what a good man he was. I remember when I was back in the 80s, I was on Saturday Night Live for a couple years, and he hosted when I was there. Yeah, he did, yeah.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Oh, I didn't realize that.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah.

[Nancy Pelosi]

You know, one of my regrets is I will have never hosted Saturday night. I'm really funny.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Well, Nancy, let's go.

[Nancy Pelosi]

No, if Lauren is listening.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

No, no, it's not. No, it's not too late.

[Nancy Pelosi]

It's too late. I wouldn't even think of It.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I'm going to convince you. You would be fantastic.

[Nancy Pelosi]

No, no, no.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I'm going to work on your audition with you. Okay?

[Nancy Pelosi]

No, no, no. Yes, I am. You said be prepared. I have crossed the bridge.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

No, you have not crossed the bridge. No, I'm going to help you with this. Speaking of your mom, this is something I found incredibly touching that when you, you would get letters from your mother whenever a woman, a woman was appointed. Can you please tell us what those letters were? That is mind blowing to me. Will you tell?

[Nancy Pelosi]

When Bill Clinton became president, I was in Congress since 87. He went in in 93. And every time he made an appointment of a woman, she would clip it from the paper and send it and said, please tell her how happy it made me. Please tell her because she really new in her own life, really, but not in a resentful way, but just in a acknowledging way. That women were so underutilized in our society, in our government, in every way. And that the president would be making these appointments was such a source of joy. And I remember telling some of those women, you made my mother so happy. You didn't know her, she didn't know you, but you were so happy. And she would say it.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Tell them I'm praying for them.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Yeah, always praying. That's a big part of our existence. So. Yeah, but it is. Here's the thing again, we don't agonize. We organize women and I speak to women all the time and just say, I know this is hard. This is not for the faint of heart. You put yourself out there, you become a target. That's just the way it is. But understand how necessary it is for you to do that. As you said earlier, this isn't to take the place of men. It's to be there at the table with that diversity.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Absolutely, yes.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And I tell them the story of when I went to my first meeting at the White House as leader. And I wasn't nervous or anything because I'd been to the White House many times as an appropriator, as an intelligence leader, all that.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

And this was with. Under George W. Bush.

[Nancy Pelosi]

George W. Bush. And so when I went, when the door opened into the room, as soon as I saw the room, I knew that this was the first meeting of its kind that I had ever been to. In fact, it was the first meeting of its kind that any woman had been to because it was the president, vice president, the leaders, House and Senate, Democrat and Republican. It wasn't like a cabinet meeting, which is wonderful, but everybody is Appointed by the President there at the President's will. I was there at the will of the House Democrats, so two different branches of government. And he recognized that. He said, he started welcoming me. And here's the first time we've ever had a woman at a meeting like. And I know we're going to hear some new ideas. And as he's going on like that, I felt very crammed in in my chair. I couldn't understand why it never happened before or since. Very crammed into my chair. And all of a sudden I realized it was Susan B. Anthony, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Lucretia Mott, Sojourner Truth, Alice Paul. Everybody was on that chair with me. They were right there. And I could hear them say, at last we have a seat at the table.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And then they were gone. And my first response was, we want more. We want more women, we want more diversity and the rest. But the lesson reason I tell the story is I'm standing on their shoulders. Imagine they started, I know such in the middle of the 19th century for women to have the right to vote. It took a long time and it's been a long time since I'm standing on their shoulders, all of us in Congress standing on their shoulders and others are standing. When I first went to Congress, there were 23 women, 12 Democrats, 11 Republicans out of 435 members of the House.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

What the hell?

[Nancy Pelosi]

What is this?

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah.

[Nancy Pelosi]

So we made a decision on our side that we would reach out, that we would recruit, we would fund, we would mentor, teach all the rest of that. Some people self recruited and that was beautiful. In this Congress we had 96 Democrats, Democratic women, 96 Republicans, got up to 30 something, I think, but we had three times that. We want more. And then of course we want to see women whatever it is, whether it's the military, whether it's security, whether it's corporate America, whether it's academia, whatever it is, entertainment, whatever it is, we want to see more women in leadership roles making those decisions. I know, think of it. This is in 2000, 2005, right? More than 150 years since they started with women having the right to vote.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

By the way, I'm wearing a suffragette necklace today.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Good, good, good, good.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yes. This is from the suffragette movement we love so much.

[Nancy Pelosi]

We do, we love them so much. And we all have a responsibility to be suffragettes in our as we move.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

There's lots more.

[Nancy Pelosi]

We have to get into that. We have to. And we have to at some point have a woman president yeah, we do.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

And hopefully it'll be in our lifetime.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Not mine.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Oh, absolutely, it'll be in your lifetime, Nancy. Just stick with the hot dogs and the chocolate ice cream. You're gonna outlive us all. So, look, I'd like to ask you about your marriage.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Yeah.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

For the first, I guess, maybe 25 years. I guess it seemed pretty traditional, I think. And he had a very demanding, successful career. How. How did your marriage evolve as your political career demanded more of you?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, first of all, poor Paul. I mean, wonderful Paul. This marriage was not something he bargained for, you know, Deb.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

So is this your way of giving him an out right now?

[Nancy Pelosi]

No, no, it's just how we laugh about it. Yeah, but see, before we met, my thought was that I was going to law school and I was going to do this, that. Then I got married, had five children. Six years. Seven. And why five?

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Why didn't you go for more? No, I'm serious. Why'd you cut it off at 5? Did you think you might have more or that was it then?

[Nancy Pelosi]

No, I think five was it. I mean, there are all kinds of things that were going on at that very same time. And by the way, as I say to women, when you're taking inventory of your accomplishments, give yourself a gold star for being a mom. Because there's no multi. Team, multitasking endeavor like that.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Nothing. Nothing like it. Nothing like it.

[Nancy Pelosi]

You're called upon to do everything all the time, right? Yeah. In our first years, it was all about the kids. I didn't even have a chance to wash my face. Sometimes when you have five little children crawling around, you don't even have time to wash your face. Yeah, right. But you're so hardworking, I guess, so intensely involved that once they're in school, all you think you're gonna save the world, right?

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah.

[Nancy Pelosi]

You've been taking care of five children all day. And we had our systems and all the rest of that, about how we spend time at the park and this. And now they're in school all day. Oh, my gosh.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Is that when you became library commissioner?

[Nancy Pelosi]

No, no, they were little when I came that.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Oh, I see.

[Nancy Pelosi]

So that wasn't as demanding time as being the chair of the party or something like that.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Right, right, right.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And no, they were. I'll show you a picture. One of them these days of my getting sworn in. They're crawling on the table. They're crawling under the table. They were little kids. Little ones, but. So the first years, then they were in school all day. And then I could take responsibility to do some other things. And. Well, here's what happened. I was somewhat active politically, you know, for friends who were running for office, this or that, not much, but a little bit. And Jerry Brown decided that he was going to run for President of the United States. Right. This is 1976. Jerry Brown said he was going to run for President of the United States. My very close friend in politics, Leo McCarthy, was the speaker of the House at the time, chair of Jerry Brown's presidential campaign. I said to Leo, tell the governor, if he wants to run for president, he cannot wait until the California primary, which is in June. Very late in the process. Yeah, because by then, somebody will be the nominee for the party. They will then take control of the California Democratic Party because they will be able to choose who are the delegates to the convention. All of that. That's how it worked in those days. So there was a. This may be more than you ever want to know, but as I say to people, be ready. You never know. So in Maryland, they had something that the Secretary of State, the law said that if anybody is a candidate in any state, they would be on the Maryland ballot. So I said to Leo, leo, tell the governor, get on the ballot. Stay on the ballot in Maryland. Right. Stay on the ballot, and we can win this. I mean, I was a housewife. But I said, you know, my brother had recently been mayor. My friend was a county executive, Ted Venatulus. My brother, Thomas Delisander. We had grassroots. You have to have the grassroots organized. We had the grassroots organized. He's the star. I mean, he was so fabulous. He was middle 30s. He was like 30. Oh, my God.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Almost a Jesuit priest, too, by the way, all that.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And when he came to Maryland, he was spectacular. He was spectacular. He was drawing crowds. We were breaking down walls of hotels and everything to the street. The crowds were turning out for Jerry.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Wow.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And we won Maryland. And when we went back to California, people were like, what? How did that happen? And he said, at this big welcoming event, Nancy Pelosi was the political director of my Maryland campaign.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Which is true.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Which was true. But he never usually would.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yes, but you were thinking outside the box. That's kind of. That's fabulous.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And so one thing. Then they were like, you have to be chair of the party here. You have to do this. So one thing led to another. So when I became the wit, which was the race, that made the difference, I just said, I'm going forward into the leadership. And people said, men said. Who said she could Run. I was like, please light my fire, why don't you? Yes, I said I could run. Okay. So in any case, Jerry came for my swearing. It was a big deal. A woman was being sworn in as whip the first time anything like that. He said, I made this happen. No, I made you happy. I fit in.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Oh, God.

[Nancy Pelosi]

So anyway, you just never know in the course of events how some place, your talent, your experience, your. Whatever it is, just takes off.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

You've been in Washington so long, Nancy, and you've been on the front lines. You've witnessed so much in terms of the vitriol in the discourse between sides has become so toxic. It's the most toxic I've ever witnessed in my lifetime. Yeah. Let's eat chocolate. Absolutely.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Have a piece.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

And do you think before I ask you anymore, can I have one of these, too?

[C]

Okay.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Is any good? Is it worth it?

[Nancy Pelosi]

Delicious. Delicious.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Oh, this is too huge.

[Nancy Pelosi]

They're big.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah, they're big. All right. Well, anyway, I'm gonna ask you this question and then eat this. Do you think it's ever gonna be possible to pull back from this toxicity? Do you. I mean, do you think it's possible to sort of put the toothpaste back in the tube in terms of public discourse in your heart of hearts?

[Nancy Pelosi]

I will answer the way I say everything. Public sentiment is everything. The public has to be a public sentiment to prevail. People have to know, and they have to know where this vitriol is coming from. This people say to me, oh, you're in a gridlock. I said, we're not a gridlock. We're in obstruction. This isn't mutual disagreement here. This is initiated by them. For years, I had been the targets, dressed like a devil, horns, cloven feet. What they did to Hillary Clinton in the 90s when she was first lady in the Clinton, they have used this because they are bankrupt of ideas and they have to take other people down.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Right?

[Nancy Pelosi]

So I make no apology for saying this is not mutual. It is instigated by them. And that's who they are and where they are. When my husband was attacked, the sanctity of our home had violated his personal safety to the point of we don't even know if he's going to survive. They left, laughed. They told jokes on their website.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Believe me, I heard it.

[Nancy Pelosi]

The governor of Virginia, Republican Governor Elon Musk, all of them, they thought that was really funny, right? I mean, really, how much more do people have to know? So we don't have shared values when it comes to Understanding the responsibility. We want people to have trust in government. We want them to be involved in it. We don't want them to see all that mess and. And think, oh, I can't wait to be a part of that. We want them to see it as something where, since the beginning of our country, we've had disagreements about the role of government, the role of a central government. And that is a legitimate debate of a democracy. It is not the basis for the politics of personal destruction. But make no mistake, this is a Republican agenda.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I agree with that.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And I don't know any Democrats who engage. Engaged in that. I really don't know. Maybe somebody comes to call and tell me somebody wants that they heard. But I don't know any Democrats who engage in that.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah. And I think that people are. Most people are fundamentally good. And so we have to count on that and believe in that and move forward with that in our hearts and minds. Right.

[Nancy Pelosi]

The goodness of the American people. It's a source of hope for us.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

That's right. You wouldn't do this.

[Nancy Pelosi]

The common grounds that we find in the art gives us hope. People say, where is hope? I said, hope is sitting where it always has been. Right between faith and charity. Faith and the goodness of others gives people hope that we can find our common ground.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I think I'm gonna convert to Catholicism after this conversation. I don't know I'm gonna do on confession, but I may have to do it. All right. We have to wind things up. Cause you have places to go. I have quick little questions to. There's something you go back and tell yourself at 21, Nancy. I'm glad we got the chocolate.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Know your why. It's the same thing. Know your why. Why are you doing what you're doing?

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Okay. Is there something you wish you'd spent less time on, Nancy?

[Nancy Pelosi]

I'd have to spend some time thinking about that. Maybe I should have spent more time. People said to me when I was chair of the party, and I'd be dragging bags up the middle of the street to the post office to get in mail in time for an election. Why don't you have somebody else do that and go home and comb your hair and fix up your face, so.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Maybe you would maybe spend more time on a little self care.

[Nancy Pelosi]

A little.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Or just a shower, perhaps? Yeah, exactly.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Yeah. We always used to say self promotion is a terrible thing, but somebody's got to do it.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

And last question. Is there something that you would like me to know about aging?

[Nancy Pelosi]

About aging?

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Oh, yeah.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, it's something that has to be embraced. Hopefully it is inevitable. Yes. And it is. It can really be a joy for me. It has been a joy.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yes.

[Nancy Pelosi]

But aging is a long way off for you.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Well, bless your heart, but it ain't.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Look forward to it with joy. And just remember that we have responsibilities to the future, no matter what our age is and the experiences that we have add to that responsibility. But I would say to you what I would say to somebody 21 years old. Keep knowing your why. Be ready for whatever comes next and know the power of you and share that with others.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

God bless you.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Thank you.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Thank you. Nancy Pelosi, what a treat to have you here.

[Nancy Pelosi]

My pleasure. It's my pleasure. Again, let me just close by saying what fans we all are of yours. Thank you. Not only because you're a talented actress and you have the power to move us, to make us laugh and the rest, but also your personal story is such an inspiration.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Thank you.

[Nancy Pelosi]

And your being an inspiration gives people. Thank you. Thank you.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Thank you.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Remember when you came to the White House for the French president with your father?

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah, I sure do. I sure do.

[Nancy Pelosi]

He was so proud of you on his arm.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I know. It was crazy. That was amazing. That was amazing. I'm so happy seeing the two of you together.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Seeing you with your father and the pride he took in you and the joy that you had being with him was such a source of joy to the rest of us.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Well, thank you for saying that. It was. My father came here. He was born in France, of course. And so for him to have the opportunity to French president, to meet the French president, to come to a state dinner like that was pretty mind blowing. It was really an exciting. That was an exciting evening, for sure.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, I know he must, as one born in France, been excited about seeing the French president, but to the rest of us, the joy we saw was him having you on his arm, coming in there, proud of his daughter.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Thank you so much. I appreciate that. All right, we done did it.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Here we go.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

You want more chocolate?

[Nancy Pelosi]

No, darling, I'm good. I still have some in my hand.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Well, wasn't that something else? Oh, my goodness. Ladies and gentlemen. Wow. Okay. So normally, of course, on this podcast, I call my mother after these conversations, and I sort of bring her up to speed on the conversation that I've had with the wise woman I was talking to. But in this case, my dear mom was listening because she was so excited to hear it live. So she heard the conversation. We're gonna grab her on Zoom now to See what her thoughts are. Sit tight. Hi, Mommy.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Hello.

[C]

Hello. Wow. Thank you for letting me sit in on that incredible, incredible interview. And what a moment in life for me.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah, that was pretty crazy, right?

[C]

Oh, I mean, I'm just so grateful. I'm so grateful to Nancy Pelosi for being there for so long in such a strong way, being so right about everything. It was a great pleasure to see her and just be with her.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah, I know. I felt the same. By the way, I don't know if you know this, but my sister Lauren came to watch it live too, as did my niece, your granddaughter, Fia. And she came along as well. And so she got to meet Nancy Pelosi, which was very important and exciting. I thought that was cool.

[C]

Extremely. Because Nancy Pelosi is very connected to the women that came before her.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yes.

[C]

That she feels very completely, viscerally connected to and those that are coming after. Because if you remember, when she became the first woman headed the house, she had her grandchildren come.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Well, not just her grandchildren. She brought all the children up.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Well, yes.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

So there were lots of people who had brought their kids on the opening day of Congress and they had brought their children and grandchildren to the floor. And so she invited all the children up, which is so cool of her to have done.

[C]

And they will always remember that moment. And, you know, if you're there at one of these crowning moments, it changes your life.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

That's right.

[C]

You know, and our dear Fia, and the girls that age and the younger girls all have all these opportunities thanks to people like Nancy Pelosi, who actually broke into it. And boy, were they ever entitled to it.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

And also, by the way, you know what else is interesting? She has said many times that she's doing the work she does, she's doing it for the children. She uses that phrase a lot. I thought that was particularly interesting because I don't know, you remember, but Patti Smith, when she was on the show, she said the same thing. When people ask her where she stands, she says she stands for the children. That's an interesting framework to think about. A point of view, a political point of view to apply that lens to help you come to a conclusion or an opinion.

[C]

Right. It's a bridge over time. And if you envision that, then that makes your work terribly important. But not just for you. It makes it for the future.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Right, Mom? Yes.

[C]

I have to say I lost my calendar. I'm speaking of the future on my cell phone. My calendar has disappeared. Why?

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Did you get a new phone?

[C]

No, I got the same phone, just my calendar. You know, the little thing that says 13, like today, that's disappeared. So I, I go into, I go into Siri and I say, siri, find my calendar. So guess what she comes up with.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I don't know what a pops.

[C]

This thing that says my calendar. It's got little roses on all kinds of little flowers and fairies and things. And then the pregnancy calendar.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

What?

[C]

A pregnancy calendar. And you, you keep that. You know, when was your last period and all these.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Did you put in 1981?

[C]

I. I can't count backwards that well. So, so I, I just, I decided to look for another calendar, but I thought that was a maybe. What? So, so, I mean, you can look up anything these days. You can find, you know, whatever you want to do. You can find a something, a calendar that help you.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Okay. But I think that the calendar thing is probably has to do with an update on the iPhone. And I can help you figure out the calendar. There's a search thing that you can push.

[C]

I know, I, I search that, I searched that. And what comes up is one day so, so in I can find out what's happening today, but then, but then I can't. I don't get my app back.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I can help you do that.

[C]

Okay, well, promise you will do that.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I will, I promise. So, by the way, this is, as you know, the end of season three, and I think what a perfect conversation to end on because we can all sort of leave this season thinking about what is our why and kind of pound down on understanding not only what our why is, but how it came to be, and then apply it to our life and move forward positively. And I mean, it sounds like this is all of a sudden a self help podcast. I really don't want it to be, or mean it to be. But anyway, it's interesting, an interesting thing to consider. I've actually been thinking about what is my why. I'm not really sure what it is, but I'm thinking about it anyway. I just want to say that's the end of Wiser than Me Season 3, and it was a great one to go out on. And bam, there you go. Right?

[C]

Oh, yeah, sorry.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Sorry, Mommy. Had you fallen asleep?

[C]

I didn't know who you were talking to.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I didn't know who I was talking to either. I'm talking to our listeners, but I'm also talking to you. And I'm just still, still on here.

[C]

Yes. I have to say it has really been a great season because of what we've learned about the women and how you've listened to them and how important it's been for all of us to listen to all of it and get our own energy involved with it.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Yeah, that's right. So it's true. If you've got older women in your life, take some time to listen to them. You might learn something. And mommy, I learned tons from you. And I love you tons.

[C]

And I love you so much. And don't think I'm not learning anything from you. I learned plenty.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

I know you do.

[C]

Yeah.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

And we've got more lessons to come.

[C]

Oh.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Ooh. Okay. I love you.

[C]

I love you.

[Nancy Pelosi]

Bye.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Bye. There's More Wiser Than Me With Lemonada Premium on Apple, you can listen to every episode of season three ad free. Subscribers also get access to exclusive bonus interview excerpts from each episode. Subscribe now by clicking on the Wiser Than Me podcast logo in the Apple Podcasts app and then hitting the subscribe button. Make sure you're following Wiser Than Me on social media. We're on Instagram and TikTok at wiser than Me and we're on Facebook at Wiser Than Me podcast. Wiser Than Me is a production of Lens Media, created and hosted by me, Julia Louis Dreyfus. This show is produced by Chrissy Peace, Jamila, zara Williams, Alex McGowan and Oja Lopez. Brad hall is a consulting producer, Rachel Neal is VP of New content, and our SVP of weekly content and production is Steve Nelson. Executive producers are Paula Kaplan, Stephanie Whittles Wax, Jessica Cordova, Kramer, and me. The show is mixed by Johnny Vince Evans with engineering engineering help from James Sparber, and our music was written by Henry hall, who you can also find on Spotify or wherever you listen to your music. Special thanks to Will Schlegel and of course my mother, Judith Bowles. Well, believe it or not, this is the final episode of season three, and because it takes a lot of people to make a show like this, I wanted to take a moment and quickly thank all of the many wise people who helped make this this podcast possible. Our incredible marketing team includes Lizzie Breyer Bowman, Jackie Westfall, Sahar Baharlu Rose Dennis, Amber Girardi Robinson, Grace Cohen Chen, and Emily Dentinger. Thanks to our friends in business development, Cece Dong Brin, Val Bodurtha, Mia Liccardi, Ron Russ, and Dana Wickens, with additional support from Autumn Dornfeld, Christina Perdomo Fernandez, Rochelle Greene, Brian Castillo, and Noah Smith. Follow Wiser Than Me wherever you get your podcasts and if there's a wise old lady in your life. Listen up. Hey, Wiser than me. Listeners, we want to hear from you by just answering a few questions on our list. In our survey, you can share feedback about show content you'd like to see in the future and help us think about what brands would serve you best and even better. Once you've completed the survey, you can enter for a chance to win a $100 Visa gift card. The survey is short and sweet and will help us play ads you don't.

[C]

Want to skip and keep bringing you content you love.

[Julia Louis Dreyfus]

Just go to lemonadomedia.com survey lemonade.com survey.