Transcript
Marc Maron (0:01)
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He's the writer and director of the new movie A Real Pain, which he stars in along with Kieran Culkin. I thought it was enjoyable. I thought it was good. I thought it was well written. I thought it was well acted. I like that Kieran Culkin guy and I like him and Jesse together. I will recommend the movie if that means anything to you. It's a good watch. It's a tight movie. I'll get this out of the way too. It's fine. This week I'm at Largo in Los angeles on Friday, December 13th for a comedy and music show. We're going to play some songs and have some comics and I'll do some comedy and some singing. Then I'm in Sacramento, California at the Crest Theater on Friday, January 10th. I'll be in Napa at the Uptown Theater Saturday, January 11th. I'm in Fort Collins, Colorado, Lincoln Center Performance hall on Friday, January 17th. Then Boulder, Colorado at the Boulder Theater on Saturday, January 18th. I'll be in Santa Barbara, California at the Libero Theater on Thursday, January 30th. Then San Luis Obispo, California at the Fremont center on Friday, January 31st. Monterey, California at the Golden State Theater on Saturday, February 1st. There's a lot of other dates coming. Oklahoma, Kansas, North Carolina, South Carolina, Texas. Just go to wtfpod.com tour and you can see the whole list. You can see it all. All right, okay, so look, a lot of things happened last week. Some of them fairly monumental. I can, I can list them for you if you give a shit. I know the world is a difficult place and there's a foreboding, a horrendous black cloud of dread at the hearts of many reasonable people. But I am trying to continue to live my life. I got an email from a guy and I think it's kind of a life changer. And this guy's not a pro, therapist or assessor of psychological things. I'll just read this to you, but this guy Cameron, he says, I want to comment on the ADHD narcissism thoughts that you've been openly sharing and your recent interview with Rosemary DeWitt where you commented that listeners are suggesting ADHD. It could be ADHD. Your stories often support this. I'm not about to suggest this, but speaking to a qualified evaluator is always an option. But on the idea of self centeredness and adhd, this idea of how one can be so focused on self and have so much doubt, you are right. Narcissists don't experience doubt. I'm a coach that works with super creative leaders and business owners, most having an ADHD diagnosis. I also have adhd. One consistent complaint from their life partners and employees is that they seem so self centered and the narcissism question can come up. So they could be narcissists and have adhd, but this is extremely rare. So why are these people with ADHD accused of being self centered? Now look, I know I'm reading this whole thing, but you gotta understand something. Personally, I don't even know what I would do with a diagnosis. And I can't tell you that I'm going to go to a professional evaluator. I don't know whether I care whether I have ADHD or not because I'm probably not going to medicate. It's just my nature. I'm a guy who is very cognitively oriented. Therapeutically. I believe in contrary action and acting as if and through repetition. I find that the new neural pathways are kind of opened up, plowed, carved out. That's just my belief. But let's get back to this because there's something about this may be helpful to you, but it was certainly an amazing breakthrough for me. Just the information here. He says the main dilemma with ADHD is getting access to our task network, the place we make decisions and identify, prioritize and execute tasks. We then spend a lot of time in the meaning making part of the brain the default mode network. I often say we are wired for context when we consider new information, the first thing we do is ask, how does this relate to me? So this in and of itself is kind of a mind blower for me because that is how I take in everything. And I never thought I was narcissistic and I actually made a decision to shift my comedy through that lens entirely, no matter what I'm talking about. And I think everyone kind of does this, but not with everything. So he goes on, we are attempting to orient ourselves to the new information, but what it looks like is self centered behavior. In part because it is, but it's not because of narcissism. Back to the incessant experience of doubt and dread. People with adhd, self concept or sense of self fades when we are not doing the things that matter most to us. People think of misplacing keys as the example of memory challenges. We misplace our sense of self. Holy fuck. That is like a key to the kingdom, man. So when you perform music at Largo, the experience is always better than the thoughts that led up to it. I teach and when I teach, I'm reminded of what matters to me. Our experience informs our sense of self, providing important feedback loops. Holy shit. This is also why it is hard to get present with an opportunity. We can play out all the different scenarios of how something could go wrong. Like you were sharing about the New York gig. Everyone's ADHD presents differently based on their lived experience. Someone with depression will present differently than someone with anxiety. I mean, the idea that we forget our sense of self, that we misplace our sense of self, that is so fucking fundamentally important to me. Look, I don't know how anyone else can relate to this, but I'm just sharing this because it blew my fucking mind. Because I think about this stuff all the time. Why am I not acting like the person I am? Why am I feeling so fragile and like I don't know anything or what I'm doing? Or you can say it's fear. But misplacing sense of self when you're not engaged with what it is that you find meaning in. How fucking good is that? This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. And if you're new to Squarespace, I've got good news for you. You're getting the best version of Squarespace there's ever been when you start using it today. Squarespace has always been the best platform to create your online presence, but now Squarespace is even better thanks to cutting edge AI technology that makes building your site even easier with better results. Design intelligence from Squarespace helps you a more personalized website tailored to your unique needs. There are also innovations when it comes to getting you paid. Squarespace Payments is the easiest way to manage your payments in one place. Get started in just a few clicks and start receiving payments right away while giving your customers more ways to pay. And all the standard Squarespace features are still there. The Squarespace video studio, email campaigns, Squarespace analytics and more. Go to squarespace.com wtf for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, use offer code WTF to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. That's squarespace.com WTF offer code WTF yes. So this ADHD thing again, doesn't matter if I have it. Doubtfully, I will find out. And I doubt that I would take medication for it because I have adapted in certain ways and it is kind of part of me. And I'm not saying that's right for everybody. Maybe it'd be nice to know. I don't know. But this misplaced self business. The misplaced self. Oh my God. I always thought that I was just, you know, well guarded and defensive and scared and all that. It may be that, but it is a very specific feeling this guy talked about. And that kind of leads into my experience in New York because, like heading into this gig, we did a rehearsal. It was me and Vivino, Adam Menkoff on bass, Sean Felton on drums, and we rehearsed. And then turns out Kevin Bacon was going to be at the gig. So we asked him if he wanted to sing one. He came down, did Run Run Rudolph, the Chuck Berry tune, and then Kingfish Christone, Kingfish Ingram. He came down, did a couple of songs. He didn't rehearse with us, but the next day we did a run through anyway. So we did the rehearsal. I felt pretty good about it. All I was thinking about is don't choke. Figure it out. You know these songs. Figure it out. Don't choke. Try to have a good time. Get in the pocket, dude. But more importantly, what happened the night after rehearsal is, look, I haven't gone to the Comedy Cellar much in the last five years. I don't know what it was. There's many reasons why I turned on it. 1. You know, it's a place where I started out and I never felt when I was younger that I was necessarily welcome there. I always felt that it was a difficult room. I always felt judged by Manny and Esty and I just. It's a little traumatic. And I also thought it got Kind of bro y. And I thought maybe I had some enemies there. You know, I've got an old friend that's there a lot, and, you know, we don't speak. And I was just like, fuck it, I'm not going there anymore. But I used to just like to go to, you know, to, you know, to hang out with the people, with the comics. And now they've got, like, four rooms. But anyway, so I'm walking with Minkoff and I'm like, it. I'm going over there. You know, it's like I. You know, I'm going over there. I'm Mark Marin. I found myself. I'm Mark Marin. I can go there. I'm not like some, like, marginal. Well, maybe a little. But I'm, you know, I. I paid my dues at that point. I'm just going to go, fuck it. I'm going to go hang out. And I get there, and it's kind of crazy. I'm just sitting there and I'm looking at all the four monitors, and for some reason, Bobby Lee was there, and that was great. Santino was there. Chris Rock is there. Ari Shafir is there. Darren Aronofsky's hanging out. A tell comes in, and they asked me if I wanted to do a spot. And I haven't set foot on that stage, I swear to God, in 10 years. And I just rose above all this dumb, weird shit from not being there for so long. And I'm going to use this misplaced self thing because I had to kind of reconfigure who the fuck I am. I've been doing this my whole fucking life. I went on stage for, like, 10, 15. I killed it, you know, things. I thought it was going to be tense as fuck, and it just. It was just normal. It was just people talking. It was just normal. We're all old fucks now, and I guess holding on to these resentments or fears and whatever or beefs. I don't know. It just. It was all just. It was like a fucking weight was lifted off of my goddamn back. I did, you know, I did the. I did the set. I saw old friends. I can't say I repaired any friendships, but everything was normal in terms of communicating and hanging out. And it was just sort of like, what a relief. What a relief. And then the gig the next day after that, the gig went great. I never played better than I played on Going, Going Gone, the Dylan song that night. And Maddie Weiner went on and killed it. Nimesh Patel went on Kingfish went on, bacon was there, Jimmy, Viviano, all those. It was just. It was great. And I felt really good about it for about a day. And then I saw the video and I'm like, I screwed up that lyric. Oh, man. I wasn't totally right on that song. And then it just started picking at it. But I did have a day or two of just feeling good about it. So that's nice. You don't always get second chances in life, but right now, I'm going to give you a second chance at Simplisafe's Black Friday deal. 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Head to SimpliSafe.com WTF to claim your discount and make sure your home is safe this season. Don't wait. This offer won't last long. Keep your home and your family and your peace of mind protected by going to simplisafe.com wtf. There's no safe like Simplisafe. Okay, so here we go. Jesse Eisenberg, a real pain. The film is now playing in theaters. Jesse is the writer, director, and costar of the film. And this is me talking to Jesse. You know, we're coming into this talking about animation, and he just texted me that we were both Lex Luthor. And it's one of those things, dude. Like, I don't know how connected you are to animation, but I'm doing that thing and I literally didn't even know really what it was. It was super pets or something.