How To Achieve Peak Male Status 🎙 #381

Summary

You Betcha Radio – Episode #381

Title: How To Achieve Peak Male Status 🎙
Date: June 10, 2026
Hosts: Myles "The You Betcha Guy," Ryan, Tyler, Jerrod, (plus Charlie guest appearance)

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Brief Overview

Episode #381 is a hilarious, nostalgia-soaked deep-dive into “peak male status,” full of Midwest charm and camaraderie. The gang spends much of the episode sharing legendary fishing stories, riffing on “man culture” touchstones, debating what real masculine greatness looks like, and digressing into classic YBR goofiness—from the rescue of “Bobber Bass” (and plans for a documentary) to the virtues of pizza and beer as payment, Dippin’ Dots conspiracy theories, and the perils of opinion-maxing. It’s an essential listen for fans of Midwest humor, fishing tales, and those who’ve ever thought about sharpening their own mower blades or rescuing a fish with only one rod left in the boat.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Mental Health & Office Vibes (00:00 – 03:00)

• Ryan's Mental Check-In: Ryan reflects on being less stressed after a tough week at work.
  • “I was burdened. I was by myself…just busting shit out.” – Ryan (00:37)
  • Observations about how quickly he walks when he’s pissed, leading to a group demonstration of his “Run DMC” strut.
• Classic Office Banter: The group jokes about Ryan’s signature walk and communication styles at work.

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2. The Legend of Bobber Bass (03:00 – 18:00)

• Epic Fishing Story: Myles tells the now-infamous tale of losing and then rescuing “Bobber Bass” using a kid’s Hot Wheels Zebco (clicky reel) that wasn’t actually meant to catch real fish.
  • Quote: “So at first, we’re like, holy shit. This is crazy. And then we’re like, oh holy shit. We gotta save this bass. We gotta save Bobber Bass.” – Myles (07:03)
• The Rescue Mission:
  • Desperate attempts to catch the loose bobber, chaotic teamwork, and failed tackle; all set against a backdrop of “rom-com rain,” sunset, and a double rainbow (08:00–08:30).
  • “We’re just out in the rain fishing... there’s a double rainbow in the sky. I can’t make this up.” – Myles (08:23)
• Ultimate Redemption: The fish is eventually snagged and rescued by Jake, who, ironically, had tied the shoelace knot that failed in the first place.
  • “It’s truly a redemption story because guess who tied the initial line?” – Myles (11:14)
• Documentary Tease: Talk of making this saga into an actual documentary.
• Memorable Moment: Audio playback of the “rescue” full of celebratory yelling (13:09–13:52).
• Inside Jokes: Plans to memorialize Bobber Bass with framed lures, a “Big Mouth Bobber Bass” toy line, and mock-Gordon Lightfoot-style ballads.
  • “We’re gonna be slapping Big Mouth Bobber Bass on everything.” – Myles (24:51)
  • “It’s sort of like ‘Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald’ but more fun.” – Tyler (22:54)

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3. What Is “Peak Male Status”? (26:56 – 41:00)

Traits, Skills & Midwest Masculinity:

• Rescuing a Fish: Initiates the discussion—acts of self-reliance and integrity.
• Mechanical Intuition: Knowing what’s wrong with machines by sound or feel is held up as a masculine ideal.
  • “Being able to listen to something and know what’s wrong with it is peak male status.” – Myles (27:05)
  • “My brother-in-law hears my truck and says, ‘Oh, you just need a new fuel line.’ That’s so fucking cool.” – Jared (27:41)
• Sharpening Mower Blades: Doing one’s own maintenance = self-sufficiency, lauded as “peak.”
• Self-Reliance: Living off the grid, tending your own garden and fuel, enjoying solitude and the outdoors.
• Old Westerns, Simple Pleasures: Enjoying slow entertainment, sharpening a stick, staring at the woods, and eating with a pocketknife.
• Strength/Utility: Opening jars no one else can, manning the grill for a big crowd, or splitting wood.

Memorable Quotes & Humor:

• “If another guy can’t open the pickle jar and you can... you basically own him and his family now.” – Myles (30:43)
• “Cutting a tree down and getting it to land where you actually want it to land? That’s peak.” – Jared (33:29)
• Fantasizing about a “tree-cutting simulator” VR game; sharing favorite stump removal methods.
• Chainsaw artists, bears, and internet haters: “If that’s not proof the Internet will hate anything...” – Myles (35:52)

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4. Opinion-Maxing, Comments, and the Internet (36:01 – 41:56)

• The “Comment Section” Trap: Tyler shares how reading online comments ruined his enjoyment of TV, leading to “opinion minimization.”
  • “I feel like my opinion got really influenced by Internet comments. So I’m trying to avoid them all.” – Tyler (36:10)
• New Segment – ‘Keep Your Opinion To Yourself’: The group tries (and jokes about) not sharing their opinions, highlighting the modern desire for “opinion minimization.”
• Meta-Podcast Commentary: They poke fun at themselves being an opinion-based show amid these trends (“If you don’t share your opinion, that sucks, because this is a podcast.” – Miles, 39:08)

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5. Male Rituals, Canoes, and Manly Boats (48:53 – 50:25)

• Owning a Canoe: Ownership of a real canoe (not a kayak) is crowned as peak Midwest masculinity.
• Paddle vs. Pedal: The gang debates whether pedal-powered kayaks are manly, ultimately agreeing that “if you prefer the harder way in life to do something, that’s peak male status.” – Myles (50:02)

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6. “Better Than Money” – The Midwest Barter System (54:04 – 71:16)

• Alternative Payments:
  • “Sex should never be payment.” – Group consensus
  • “Pizza and beer” as the universal Midwest compensation for helping a buddy move or with big chores.
  • “Free time,” “back scratches,” “chores,” and “bar tabs” make the list.
• Generational Wisdom: The perfect symmetry of “payment in meals” for extended projects.
• Pull Tabs Dilemma: Would they rather get $100 in cash or $100 in pull tabs? Most would choose the risk and fun of pull tabs, depending on box/odds.

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7. The Dippin’ Dots Deep Dive (72:01 – 91:20)

• Dippin’ Dots Mystery: Grand conspiracy/complaint: why can’t you get them anywhere but ballparks?
  • “I think the owners of Dippin’ Dots are actively trying not to get their product out there.” – Myles (75:10)
• Creamy vs. Fruity Debate: Clearly, creamy (cookies ‘n cream, etc.) is peak Dippin’ Dots.
• Reward Systems Rant: Punch cards vs. modern, app-based loyalty programs.
• Dippin’ Dots’ Elusive Presence: Despite claims of 22,000+ “points of presence," nobody knows where to actually buy them.
• Dippin’ Dots Franchise: The crew discovers what it takes to open a franchise and debates the absurdity of product scarcity.
  • “If they can’t get this shipping thing figured out, they’re going to be the ice cream of the past.” – Myles (77:33)

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8. The Legacy of Fun Facts (86:00 – End)

• Fun Fact Segment Turmoil: Tyler and Jared debate who should deliver weekly fun facts.
• Meta-Reflection: They acknowledge the segment’s accidental origins and the pressure to keep it fresh.
• Artificial Intelligence & Fact Sourcing: Tyler considers using AI to outsource fun facts.
  • “It’s never been an easier time to do a fun fact segment in history… Jared acts like he’s got to go to the library and thumb through the encyclopedia.” – Myles (89:06)
• Dippin’ Dots Fact: 22,600 locations, but nobody’s seen them at grocery stores (“points of presence” terminology deeply resented).
• Upcoming Challenge: Tyler gets the nod to supply next week’s fun fact—“Just give me a fastball, right down there. I just want my dick blown off.” – Myles (97:18)

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9. Listener Mail & The Ryan Meetup (98:54 – 103:00)

• Patreon Rebellion & The “Ryan Meetup": Listeners demand Ryan attend the Ryan meetup at Mall of America on July 24th.
  • “I’ll pay for his hotel room… food voucher for Margaritaville or Rainforest Cafe.” – Myles (101:13)
  • “No Brians allowed!” – Mailbag (100:29)
• Miscellaneous Chuckles: Discussion of people with names like Charlie, Miles, and “Chuck Bob Barons” and the comedy of upper-Midwest naming traditions.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• “If another guy can’t open the pickle jar and you can, you basically own him and his family now.” – Myles (30:43)
• “It’s sort of like ‘Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald’ but more fun.” – Tyler (22:54)
• “If you prefer the harder way in life to do something, that’s peak male stats.” – Myles (50:02)
• “You show up with a fun fact one day and Miles says, ‘That was actually fun, let’s do this every episode’—and we’ve been ever since.” – Jared (92:26)
• “I think the owners of Dippin’ Dots are trying not to get their product out there.” – Myles (75:10)
• “Just give me a fastball... I just want my dick blown off.” – Myles (97:18)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Ryan’s Mental Health & Walk Demo: 00:00 – 02:38
• The Legend of Bobber Bass: 03:00 – 18:00
• Peak Male Status Discussion: 26:56 – 41:00
• Opinion-Maxing & Comment Section: 36:01 – 41:56
• Stump Removal Stories: 33:55 – 35:45
• Manliness of Canoes: 48:53 – 50:25
• Better Than Money Payments: 54:04 – 71:16
• Dippin’ Dots Deep Dive: 72:01 – 91:20
• Fun Fact Segment Change: 86:00 – End
• Ryan Meetup Listener Mail: 98:54 – 103:00

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Episode Tone & Flavor

Playful, irreverent, extremely Midwest, with inside jokes, friendly roasts, and the classic dry delivery the show is known for. The entire episode mixes genuine affection for rural, masculine traditions with a healthy dose of self-parody.

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Summary for Non-Listeners

This episode is the platonic ideal of Midwest guy comedy—fishing fiascos, snack conspiracy theories, practical wisdom, and relentless mockery of modern life. Whether you care about “peak male status” or just want to hear a wild fishing rescue and a deep dive into the ice cream of the future, you’ll leave grinning—and maybe questioning why you can’t buy Dippin’ Dots at your local store.

Transcript

[Miles]

All right, here we go.

[Jared]

Back to it.

[Miles]

Welcome back, everybody, to another episode of you Bet, Your radio podcast. I'm here with the fellas. Yeah, I'm here with the fellas. Ryan, how are you feeling about your spot after last week, after the smoke has settled? Was it as much neck cranking as you anticipated?

[Ryan]

No, I feel good. Feel good about the spot?

[Miles]

Feels good. Yeah. All right.

[Ryan]

I haven't had, like, a mini spaz in a while. I just needed. I think.

[Miles]

Yeah, I think. Are you feeling one week removed from the move? Are you feeling better?

[Ryan]

Much better? No.

[Miles]

I would say you do seem less on edge.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah, I was burdened. I was by myself. I was here by myself last Thursday just busting shit out.

[Jared]

Hell, yeah.

[Ryan]

Made my. My cell phone.

[Miles]

You were busting in the office.

[Tyler]

That's what that smell is. Weird. That is your brand.

[Ryan]

You guys will never know.

[Jared]

That's true.

[Ryan]

So, yeah, no, it was. Last week is a good week. It was a good week for my. For the mental space and just my mental in general.

[Miles]

Yeah, I could tell. Yeah, I think it's in your eyes.

[Ryan]

Could be rested.

[Miles]

You seem rested. You seem relaxed.

[Tyler]

It's.

[Jared]

You can also tell what mood Ryan's in and how fast he walks around the office. Like, if you're really pissed, you're zooming. If you're just kind of pissed, you just kind of slowly walk around and normal Ryan's just faster than a normal guy. But not fast for you.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Yeah. I also feel like I have some sort of a. Like a Run DMC dip when I walk more so on my right side.

[Tyler]

What does that mean?

[Miles]

Let's see.

[Jared]

Like a pimp.

[Charlie]

What do you mean?

[Miles]

Here, let's see it. Hold on. Let's see it. Okay, now come back.

[Jared]

I've never seen you walk like that ever.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Walking the gas station like that this morning.

[Jared]

So then that's your happy walk.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Good. Mood walk.

[Miles]

I. Strutting. I have seen you do that before. He kind of has a strut.

[Tyler]

Why is it run?

[Jared]

Because.

[Ryan]

Rundy, do you guys ever. You remember that show on mtv? Was it called Yo, MTV Raps? No, it was a. It was a reality show on Run DMC and his family.

[Tyler]

Oh, okay.

[Jared]

Really?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I don't remember that.

[Ryan]

I'm pretty sure he. Well, he. He used to walk like that in. In the. In the show.

[Tyler]

Not run like that.

[Miles]

Not run like that. He was dmc.

[Ryan]

He used to run back in the day.

[Jared]

That's their retirement. They did. They're on a casino tour now, so now they're just walk. DMC Walker. That's. That's the really big. That's when they're doing nursing homes.

[Ryan]

Jog, dmc, electric.

[Miles]

Well, it's good to have. It's good to have you back in. In the right mentals, Ryan. Yeah, we were all worried about you there for a minute, but we're back.

[Ryan]

I always bounce back.

[Miles]

Last week we had bellied up. We were gone all week. I have the fishing story to Trump. All fishing stories really political. I see what you did there. My brain, I. I was like, fishing is fishing political. Got it.

[Ryan]

So were you guys abiding by the rules?

[Miles]

I don't know. But when we were fishing, it got a little Harris for us.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Ryan]

All right.

[Tyler]

See, like hunters, Biden.

[Miles]

All I know, I just. We. All I know is in my fishing career, I definitely advanced.

[Ryan]

Okay, that's a big moment.

[Miles]

No. So. All right, let's focus.

[Ryan]

All right.

[Jared]

All right.

[Miles]

All right, dial in. So Tyler's heard this.

[Jared]

Yes.

[Miles]

Jared and Ryan have not. And to. I'm gonna do my best to describe it. The. The videos help it. And we're actually thinking about doing a documentary about this. And so this is a little preview for the YBR listeners. We don't have to put in the footage. I'll just describe what happened. This is almost like a trailer for the documentary, but it's called the Legend of Bobber bass is what I'm calling it.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Miles]

So my kid has one of those clicky. The click Zebco reels.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And it's a Hot Wheels one.

[Jared]

Hell yeah.

[Miles]

And so we were out on the boat. My kid had gone to bed and it was me, Jake and Charlie Barents out on the boat and we're all fishing off the boats, having a good time. And Charlie thought it'd be funny to do a review of my kids fishing rod. And so on the fishing rod there is a. It's called like a safety hook or safety bobber. So essentially the bobber slides up and down on this section of fishing line so that when you're casting, it slides down and it covers the hook.

[Ryan]

Got it? Yep.

[Miles]

So your kid can't like catch anything when they're casting.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

But so it comes with this section. There's a little ring on the one end. There's the fishing line and then there's the hook and on there's a bobber that slides up and down. You then tie your fishing line to the hook to the. You tie your fishing line to the ring that's at the top of this mechanism.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

So now it's part of your whole rod and reel and fishing line.

[Jared]

It's basically like a slip bobber, but instead of having a slip knot to stop the bobber depth, you just tie on to the bobber now.

[Ryan]

Got it.

[Miles]

Yeah, it's just on the ring.

[Jared]

Got it.

[Miles]

So it's a great system for kids. Turns out it's not a great system for Charlie Barron. Okay, so Charlie casts out and he gets a fish on. And so we have. And we have this whole thing recorded. Charlie goes to set the hook. The line comes off of the ring at the top. So now the bass, which we found out later that it was a bass, has the hook in its mouth. Fishing line that's connected to the bobber, and the bobber is still connected to the fish. So you can see in the water where the fish is by where the bobbers at. It's like a flag that's head.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Not cool. When you realize, like, oh, shit, this fish is just gonna die a terrible death because he's got this hook in his mouth, and he's gonna get tired out from the bobber and all that.

[Jared]

And the DNR is gonna track the bobber sales back to my kid. And then you're screwed.

[Miles]

So at first we're like, holy shit. This is crazy. And then we're like, oh, holy shit. We gotta save this bass. We gotta save bobber bass.

[Ryan]

You gotta save it. Gotta save him.

[Miles]

And so we. Charlie hops on the. On the steering wheel and starts driving towards it. We're like, we don't have a net either, by the way.

[Ryan]

Okay, that's a good start.

[Miles]

So we're like, what do we do? We try to figure out. Jake's like, we need to start casting at the bobber to try and catch the bobber, which then will catch the fish. So he. We're trying to get it, you know, we lose them. We can't find them anywhere. And we got.

[Jared]

Yes. That's the best part of the video, is the bobber. Like, the fish would pull the bobber under, and then every once in a while, the bobber would pop back up. There he is.

[Miles]

We'd see it pop up. And then we got on video because we didn't know at this point what kind of fish it was because it was too far away. Bobber comes up. We're like, there it is. The fish jumps out of the water. We're like, holy. It's a big bass. And we. So right about the time Charlie does this, it starts raining Outside. But it was like a pleasant rain. It wasn't windy or anything. It was just coming down. It was. It was nice rom comrade. It was literally rom com rain. So as we're trying to get bobber bass, it's raining. But also, you know how, like, there's the clouds just over you. There's also a sunset going on. Okay, so it's sunny out, but it's raining. And then on the other side, there's a double rainbow in the sky. I can't. I cannot make this Pride month.

[Jared]

Yeah, it's true.

[Miles]

Jesus is pride flag. You know,

[Ryan]

let's not get.

[Tyler]

Sorry.

[Miles]

Let's not get political.

[Jared]

Religious and political today. Jared.

[Miles]

So we're out there for like an hour pursuing. Well, so here's what happened. We're like, we got. We got to do everything we can to get this bobber. But like, when he would disappear, we all were kind of like, no one really talking about, like, we have to do this. We just were all like, I just keep your eye out for bobber bass. Let's try and get him, whatever. So we're still continuing to regular fish. And then every once in a while, someone would spot him, drive over there and cast. And so we were doing this for an hour, and we're like, we're just out in the rain fishing. And amongst all of this. So the. The. My kid's rod is down. Jake. Well, yeah, so Jake's rod that he was using the lure, we got a northern. We think the lure are. The northern bit the line when it was flopping around.

[Jared]

There's no leader on it.

[Miles]

And so that lure was gone. So there's also a northern that, like, just can't do anything about. Yeah, so we, We. That rod was down and like, so we. We got those two down then. Well, in the chaos of trying to catch bobber bass, my line gets super tangled. Okay, this is chaotic. So there's three guys. We started with four rods. We are down to one rod at this point. And. But it was so chaotic that, like, we could have tied the other one. We just didn't. It was whatever. That we were doing some extracurricular activities.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So we're down to one rod. Charlie's driving the boat, and I see bobber bass pops up right next to the boat. Jake casts it and he's like, oh, I got him. And then he like, yanks it, whatever. And he's like, oh, I think I got a different fish. Cuz it like, whatever. And then he's like, oh, no, I got bobber. Bass. So he reels it into the boat, and we pull him into the boat, sure as it's bobber bass. The bobber. The hook and everything. And we rescued bobber bass.

[Jared]

All still there.

[Miles]

Wow. All still there.

[Jared]

So did. Did Jake catch bobber bass again, or did he snag the bobber?

[Miles]

He snagged the bobber.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Ryan]

Did he set the hook again when he snagged the bobber prob.

[Miles]

Probably.

[Ryan]

More than likely. Yeah.

[Miles]

But. Yeah. So it was like, a full team effort. Charlie was driving the boat because at the end, we only had one rod, and why. Why Jake had the rod, I don't know.

[Ryan]

Yeah, you guys must have just trusted Jake to, like.

[Miles]

Well, so here's. Here's what we found out. It. This whole legend of bobber bass is truly a redemption story, because guess who tied the initial line on my kids thing?

[Ryan]

Jake.

[Jared]

Jake.

[Tyler]

Jake.

[Jared]

That was.

[Miles]

Jake tied it, Charlie lost it, and then Jake caught it again. So someone needs to teach Jake how to tie a fishing knot.

[Jared]

Yeah. So I showed up the next day to shoot videos and miles like, oh, you don't know about bobber bass yet. And Charlie from the other room goes, jake doesn't know how to tie knots.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Not one bit surprised, actually.

[Miles]

Also a legendary move by me. My line got all tangled, you know, and we're trying to find Bob or bass, and I. You know, we get to a point where it's. With a fishing line where you're like, I want to cut this off. I got to that point. I go, charlie, can you come look at this and help me out? And I just hand him the rod. I walked away, because that was a problem now. And then I looked at it the next day, and it was more tangled than when I gave him.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So that's kind of where we were at mentally.

[Tyler]

Sure.

[Miles]

But. And then. Yeah, so then there's this whole thing. I. I will play just the audio of once we caught bobber bass, and you. I'll just let it do its. Do its thing here.

[Ryan]

So when is. Are we gonna. Is this video gonna be posted?

[Miles]

Well, we got to do. Well, we create a documentary, so I think I'm gonna have.

[Jared]

What about. Tell them about the testimonial, too.

[Miles]

Well, yeah, so we have. We'll have a testimonial in the docum. My neighbor, it was.

[Ryan]

He was watching.

[Miles]

It was a gal named Deb.

[Ryan]

Nice.

[Miles]

Wasn't watching.

[Tyler]

Just.

[Miles]

Just heard a lot of commotion. Okay, so that's the lake.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Miles]

But let me find where it is. All right, so this is. This is immediately after we realized Jake has hooked bobber bass. All right, here we go. You got bobber bass? You got bobber bass? Get bobber bass. Get him in the boat. No, don't horse him now. Don't horse them. You got bobber bass. I got him. I got him.

[Ryan]

No net.

[Miles]

Don't lose them. Grab the bobber. We got bobber bass. We got bobber bass. We got bobber bass. Look at them. We got bobber bass. Oh, we.

[Ryan]

That's electric.

[Miles]

It was electric. And then we got back to the. I mean, we're on such a high. We're on such a high. We get back to the cabin and we're like, Anne, you won't believe what happens. And she was just like. We had a really hard time explaining what this was. And she. We lost her.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

She didn't seem to care that she went up and went to bed. But. But it was like, I don't know. Charlie looked at me, goes, miles, that was the best night I've had in seven years.

[Jared]

Charlie.

[Miles]

Don't tell my girlfriend. You know, he was also feeling pretty good. Right.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that's actually.

[Miles]

I don't know if you'd say that now, but maybe I'm.

[Ryan]

Beautiful night.

[Miles]

But it was. It was great. It's just like a great night on the water with the guys. Now we did, you know, know, it's like I say that we saved a bass, but we also put the bass in danger. So. Yeah.

[Ryan]

How much line was he pulling around?

[Jared]

It was only like a foot.

[Miles]

Only. Okay.

[Ryan]

Okay. So it's okay.

[Miles]

Maybe two feet.

[Ryan]

Got it.

[Miles]

But yeah, it was. It was insane. So we need to do. I. I actually think I want to stick Tyler on the documentary and use his news skills.

[Jared]

Sure.

[Ryan]

Narration.

[Miles]

Uses narration skills. And also have him be the interviewer.

[Jared]

Sure.

[Miles]

And sit us all down and get testimonials and piece it all together and build a news package.

[Ryan]

I do have another question. How. How far did barber bass travel from the point the line broke or came off to the point where you caught him?

[Miles]

Yeah, I mean, I would say like his little range that he was going in was probably like a. Maybe like a 300 foot by 150 rectangle.

[Jared]

Ish.

[Miles]

Is where at least we saw them.

[Ryan]

Like a football field almost.

[Miles]

Yeah. Basically like kind of stayed within a football field range.

[Ryan]

Sure.

[Miles]

And so it was. That was the least. A little nice.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

But.

[Jared]

But that's a football field. It's a big area when you're in a boat.

[Miles]

For sure.

[Ryan]

For sure. Yeah, Well, I was also thinking too, like, I mean, he's. He's kind of just giving you guys the fishing spots based off of where he's going.

[Miles]

Yeah, I know. You know, I know. I felt.

[Ryan]

So keep that under wraps so we. Yeah, don't put that in the document.

[Miles]

I won't tell. I won't give the GPS coordinates.

[Jared]

That'll be part of the documentary. We'll just call it undisclosed lake and undisclosed location.

[Ryan]

Yeah, please do.

[Miles]

It was pretty funny too, because after the fact, we, like, cut off the lure that was still attached to the bobber. And Charlie was all jacked up and he's like, we're going to frame this. I'm going to take a foot because I want to take a photo of bobber bass and have someone recreate them. And we're all. I'm going to have three of them made and all this.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah. With the actual line coming out of

[Jared]

it and the bobber. Yeah.

[Miles]

So you're going to spend like a thousand bucks on. On this just very mediocre fish.

[Jared]

Charlie, I don't think he intentionally was doing this as a bit, but as he told me the story, the fish, he got a half a pound bigger. Every version of the story.

[Ryan]

What did it start at, like, pound.

[Jared]

And it started. He said, it's like about two pound bass. And then he legitimately. I don't think he was doing a bit because they were. They were going. He didn't have time to, like, think, I'm gonna say, then it was three pounds and it was three and a half. And like, I think the final thing is, like, it's almost four pound bass.

[Miles]

I would say it's by like four and a half pound bass.

[Jared]

There we go.

[Miles]

I mean, probably.

[Tyler]

What.

[Miles]

What's that, 30 inches?

[Ryan]

Yeah, we've had two kind of like iconic bass.

[Jared]

That's true.

[Ryan]

Delicious bags, like, during this. During this tenure, if you will. So, yeah, opener to ybr and. Yeah, bobber bass.

[Tyler]

Two and six years.

[Miles]

We're. Yeah, we're probably. Yeah. So, I mean, it was like. So we're good for one every three years then? On average.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah. It's like the world.

[Miles]

So I can't wait for 20, 29.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

But, yeah, I mean, obviously we were in that scenario because of our own stupidity.

[Jared]

That's how all good stories start.

[Miles]

But it's. It's a redemption story. It's a rescue mission. I mean, it's probably going to be one of our finest pieces of cinema that we ever put out.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah. It's a story you guys will never forget about.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

That's why fishing. That's why it's such a beautiful thing. You know, the great outdoors.

[Miles]

Great. And all the while, Charlie just kept tips. Anything. He realized that when I say, oh, yeah, a lot. So then he started, like, kind of mocking me with it. And he probably said, oh, yeah. On the boat in that one hour 1500 times.

[Jared]

You know who we need to get? I. Not that I'm. I'm shirking the responsibility. We gotta get the River Monsters guys to do this stuff.

[Miles]

You're talking about Wade Phillips.

[Jared]

Yes. We need Wade Phillips to do this.

[Tyler]

Wade Phillips is the coach, isn't he?

[Miles]

Look up Wade.

[Tyler]

It's not Wade Phillips.

[Ryan]

Wade Phillips of the Dallas Cowboys. We talking. Okay, that's who I thought, too.

[Tyler]

It's Wade something, but I don't think it's Wade Phillips.

[Miles]

All right, we'll see. Yeah, It's Jeremy. Jeremy Wade.

[Ryan]

Jeremy Wade.

[Jared]

We need Jeremy Wade to do this. The Ballad of Bobby Bobber Best.

[Ryan]

It's Jay Wade, old man.

[Jared]

We could ask Jared Phillips. I don't know if he's any good.

[Miles]

Jeremy. Wade Phillips. So funny. I said, it's so confident. The funny thing is, I used to do a River Monsters column in the school newspaper in high school when I was. I'd watch an episode of River Monsters and then just. Then just basically do a synopsis of what happened.

[Jared]

The column was just. He got it again.

[Miles]

But then, you know, I would always, like, play it up of, like, you know, no reported killings from it. But it lurks in the. In the Amazon river. Just waiting for a potential person to stick their limb in the water and engulf them whole.

[Tyler]

You know, try to hit the word count.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Play on their emotions.

[Ryan]

Did they ever catch the River Monsters in the. In that show?

[Miles]

That's why the show.

[Jared]

It ended.

[Miles]

He got it all.

[Ryan]

The river. Because I know he was after, like, certain ones. Like.

[Jared]

Yeah. Every episode was a hunt for at least just one specific river monster.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

And he. He ran out of river monsters.

[Tyler]

He ran train on the river.

[Miles]

He did.

[Ryan]

That's probably why it ended.

[Jared]

It is.

[Ryan]

Like, this is a. This should be a subscription show. It's gotta be.

[Jared]

He's got to just move on to lake monsters. Just change the body of water.

[Miles]

Ocean monsters. Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Come on.

[Jared]

He'll never run out of those.

[Miles]

I mean, he's still.

[Tyler]

Wade.

[Miles]

Mr. Wayne, jam. Half right, Jeremy. Wade. I knew it was Wade. God damn it. So, yeah, that was What a time. What a time. But, yeah, it was it was definitely euphoric feeling, you know, like you quit sports and you lose that, like, adrenaline that you get from playing real sports, you know? Felt that again that night.

[Ryan]

Okay, good.

[Miles]

There's magic in the air. Double rainbow. One of the rainbows went literally all the way across the sky.

[Ryan]

That's.

[Jared]

How many times did Charlie say that it goes all the way across?

[Miles]

That was my bet.

[Tyler]

That was me.

[Miles]

Yeah, but, yeah, it was. It was a great, great evening. And so you gotta be a lookout on YouTube for our documentary now. The problem is we should have just done the documentary when we had Charlie pinned down in my cabin getting him. Yeah, but I don't know. He was pretty jacked about it. This might. He might clear his schedule.

[Ryan]

That takes a lot if he's committed to getting a replica made of it too. Multiple of them. Yeah, for sure.

[Tyler]

Can always zoom them too.

[Ryan]

You could. You could also interview the taxidermist who does it. If there is a replica that's going

[Jared]

to be made, you should get a Billy bobber bass so you get the replica that can talk to you.

[Miles]

I like Billy bobber bass.

[Tyler]

And you hit the button and the bass tells the entire story.

[Jared]

Yeah, it just plays.

[Ryan]

Just the audio is recording. That's a great idea.

[Jared]

Starts with welcome back to the podcast.

[Tyler]

I would sit down.

[Ryan]

Great idea.

[Miles]

What if I told you there was three morons didn't know how to tie a fishing knot? We could also have. Do a jingle, you know? Yeah, but Bob, because Big mouth Billy, Billy, Billy.

[Jared]

Big mouth Billy.

[Miles]

Big mouth bass sings a song. Right?

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah, we could do. We could do our own rendition of it.

[Tyler]

It's sort of like Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald, but more fun.

[Miles]

Yeah, but more fun. So Ryan, get on that.

[Tyler]

Get the stew.

[Jared]

My grandpa.

[Miles]

Source some. Source some custom Billy mouth bass. Billy, what is it? Big mouth.

[Jared]

Big mouth Billy. I'm pretty sure I can Google it. That sings J Rods on it. In the meantime, my grandparents bought a. A camper, a used camper for somebody else in the lot. So we went over there and we're like moving some of their stuff out and they had like a. The parrot version of Billy the Bass. And we press the button and the first thing it does is go show me your tits. That's fucking hilarious. But we got to keep it away from my kids.

[Miles]

Big mouth Billy Bass.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

The singing sensation.

[Ryan]

So you want. You want something like that just for bobber bass. Big mouth bobber bass.

[Miles]

Yeah, it'd be Big mouth bobber bass instead of Billy Bass.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And this one says that it's motion activated. I'd like that feature too, Ryan.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

And I'd like to put it. I'd like to put them all up over the office.

[Jared]

No matter where we go, all along

[Miles]

the wall that we all walk by.

[Ryan]

It's just like.

[Jared]

Just like an echo of the story. Cuz it starts two seconds later for each pass.

[Ryan]

Done deal.

[Tyler]

Put it on your rear window in your pickup. Inside.

[Miles]

I'll put it in the bathroom for you guys. So you have some entertainment while you're

[Jared]

taking a. I just know the story by heart. Yeah, you have to.

[Ryan]

You have to sit. Really?

[Miles]

We actually were saying that it's like a great children's book story.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Kind of. Yeah.

[Miles]

So we'll probably. I mean, one word. This is a verbal trademark of big mouth bobber bass, by the way. And we're gonna create a whole franchise.

[Ryan]

You know, URL's taken already, so by us.

[Miles]

You know, like paw patrol. They have the TV show, but then they got all the merch.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

And the sippy cups and the kids blankets.

[Jared]

Every single possible piece of merchandise you could put a dog on, they've got it.

[Miles]

We're gonna be slapping big mouth bobber bass on everything.

[Jared]

There's a joke about that in the second paw patrol.

[Miles]

I know that's.

[Jared]

It's hilarious. You're like, how did we afford this big building? And then the cartoon character looks at the camera and goes, a lot of merchandising. Yeah.

[Miles]

Well, one, you butcher that dollar. I think he says, this officially licensed paw patrol merch sells like hotcakes.

[Tyler]

That's.

[Jared]

I think that's probably the exact line

[Miles]

quite a few times.

[Ryan]

Yeah. We'll get her done anyway, so.

[Miles]

Yeah, if you can start sourcing a big mouth bobber bass, that would be nice. Can you get that done, Ryan?

[Ryan]

How many you want? 15, 20 of them.

[Miles]

Well, I think if we learn from our tongs, I don't think we ended up selling through all. What was it, 5,000 tongs. So I think we probably go 10,000.

[Ryan]

Okay. I was gonna say pricey. There's usually it's, you know, after 5,000, the next price cuts about 10. So.

[Miles]

Yeah. Because then it's like, you know, we found out that when we got stuff to sling, then we're much more motivated.

[Ryan]

For sure. For sure. So when our backs are pinned against

[Miles]

the wall, imagine 10,000 big mouth Bobby bobber basses in this office.

[Tyler]

It would smell bad in your. All that fish.

[Miles]

Yeah, I would. Yeah. And I'd like them to be real fish.

[Tyler]

Put them on ice, you got a

[Jared]

hell of a task in front of you. It's going to keep you busy.

[Ryan]

I know. I just got to stay. I just got to stay at or under the daily limit so.

[Miles]

To catch all those bass.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah. I guess I don't even know what.

[Jared]

And they need to be identical to Bob or bass.

[Ryan]

So I'm sure he's part of a certain age group.

[Jared]

So you need them in there. You need 10,000 five pound bass.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Ryan]

So yeah. Anyways, five and a half pounder.

[Miles]

All right, Jared, what we got today? That's our. That's the legend of big big mouth bobber bass.

[Tyler]

Yeah. How to reach peak bell status or like what is peak bell status?

[Miles]

Okay, well, one rescuing a fish.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Male status. I think being able, being able to look at. I think being able to look at something and know what's wrong with it is peak male status. And I'll even take it a step further. Being able to listen to something and know what's wrong with it is peak male status. Like when mechanics were like, hey, just driving around the lot, I'll just listen for what's wrong and I'll tell you what's wrong with that.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And then they know. It's crazy.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah. My brother in law, I was like, my truck. You heard my truck start when I was at your house?

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

It chokes a little bit. It sounds kind of sick when you turn it over. I'm like, maybe the ignition's going bad. Like that's what I thought. He's like, oh, you just need a new fuel line. Bring it to the shop. Like, yeah, you just need a new fuel line. I'm like, God, Gabe, that's so fucking cool.

[Ryan]

I wish, I wish I could.

[Tyler]

I had to one up you, Tyler. But one time there's a problem with my dad's truck and he called the mechanic and put his phone on up to the edge.

[Jared]

That's so sick.

[Tyler]

The guy knew right away.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

That is peak mail.

[Jared]

Stab there. Yep.

[Tyler]

Through the phone.

[Ryan]

That is sweet. I think peak male, Peak male status is when you get to a point where you're sharpening your own mower blades.

[Jared]

Oh yeah.

[Ryan]

Because I've been running into a little bit of a bottleneck living out of town. Now I got to like, I usually send my mower blades with my dad who gives them to a guy at work who's really good at sharpening them. And then I get them back from my dad who gets them back from the guy. It's a, it's a process that, well that's what I'm saying. Status is when you start sharpening your own more blades.

[Miles]

Well and I think that you're going to take that a step further. I think every step that you take towards being self sufficient.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Is peak male status for sure. You know, if, if, if you wouldn't have to leave your property and you're able to survive and, or just do everything yourself. That's kind of peak male status.

[Tyler]

Yeah, the more off the grid the better.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah, that's peak or Ron Swanson.

[Ryan]

You get, you got fuel tank, you got vegetable garden, you got wildlife in the back.

[Tyler]

And your entertainment is just like staring at the wall and reading an old book over and over sort of entertainment.

[Jared]

Yeah, I think over and over.

[Miles]

I think peak male status is being able to just stare at the woods for hours and be completely content. That's peak male status. I also do think loving, actually loving what old westerns is peak man status.

[Jared]

I was gonna say tombstone in general is peak male status. Everything about it, people that watch it, the movie itself, the character, the pizza, there's parts.

[Miles]

But yeah, I think your form of entertainment tells you a lot about how peak male status you are.

[Tyler]

Or just sharpening a stick with your knife.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Just for fun.

[Miles]

I think also it's peak male status to eat an apple with a knife. A pocket knife.

[Ryan]

Oh dude, that's the best. Eating anything with a knife. Like using a knife as a fork or a spoon type.

[Miles]

Stabbing your steak with the, with the knife and eating it. Peak male status.

[Ryan]

Yeah,

[Tyler]

that's opening a pickle jar.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then you pair that with a woman who can't open the pickle. Pickle jar.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Peak male status.

[Jared]

Doing any.

[Miles]

I actually think it's even more peak status is if another guy can open the pickle jar and you can, I mean you basically own him and his family now. It's like you own his house, you own his car. I mean you own the pickle jar just empty. He owns your bank accounts now.

[Jared]

Any strength based activity that another person can't do that you can do. And I wouldn't, I wouldn't say this with like even lifting weights, but like a chore or a thing that needs to be done strength based. If you get that done and someone else can't, it's peak mail.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah. Just coming to the rescue for anyone

[Jared]

really saving the day, manning the grill

[Tyler]

for more than three people. Yeah, just like making a whole dinner on a grill.

[Jared]

My party, my dad and not it up.

[Tyler]

Right.

[Miles]

Yeah. My Dad's grill. He's owned it for a long time, and I was cooking on it the other this last week, and it's a disaster. It's. I mean, it's a big grill, so it's got to be, what, 40? It's not. It's not. It's probably, like, let's say. Let's say 36 RTUs. No, I'm talking about how wide it is. Like, 42 inch wide. Right. So it's a good sized grill. There's only two hot spots on the whole thing. It's the back left corner and then, like, front third. And so I put it. I. You know, I spread it all out, start cooking it. These aren't cooking at all. These are charred. So then I just ended up just. You then start arranging the brats and burgers like a crop circle in an alien movie, around the hot spot together for warmth.

[Jared]

Just, like, assembly line it. Well, these ones that were on the hot spot are done. They go to the top rack.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Then move in. Yep.

[Tyler]

That's why they call it manning the grill, because it's bantly. Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

It's that womaning the grill stove. Have you ever seen anyone womaning.

[Ryan]

Really, Jarrett?

[Miles]

Really, Jared?

[Tyler]

All right.

[Jared]

You're all over politics, religion with it.

[Tyler]

I'm sorry.

[Ryan]

No, it's okay. I. I get it. You slip up sometimes, and that's fine.

[Tyler]

You can say whatever you want if you apologize right after.

[Ryan]

True.

[Tyler]

Thank you for understanding.

[Ryan]

Yeah, thank you for understanding.

[Jared]

Yeah, I think just.

[Miles]

This is a comedy podcast. Thanks for understanding. No, we're good.

[Jared]

Anything to do with trees, Cutting them down, splitting them, whatever trees. It's very manly thing to be doing, dealing with.

[Ryan]

I'll take it a step further. I mean, I think any. I think a lot of people can cut a tree down when it comes, but when it comes to removing the stump.

[Jared]

Yeah. Add it to the list. You know what? I'll take this tree cutting down a step further. Cutting a tree down and getting it to land where you actually want it to land.

[Miles]

That's peak.

[Jared]

With, like, that wedge cut that they do. That's sick.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I've never. I've never done the wedge guy. I always wanted to do it. I might just have to find a tree that's about to come down and just practice.

[Miles]

Yeah, I don't have any trees cut down. I'm not. I'm gonna be honest with you guys.

[Jared]

You find one.

[Miles]

I live in Fargo.

[Ryan]

You know what would be fun? They have, like, flight simulators, tree cutting Simulator.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

VR Tree simulator.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I would do that.

[Miles]

All right, here's a new segment for our male audience. What's your guys's favorite way to remove a stump? I think mine is when they burn it from the inside.

[Ryan]

I like that.

[Jared]

I. I like the top down grinders. Those are sweet.

[Ryan]

Steer.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Go back and forth.

[Ryan]

I like when they hook a chain up and then they, they put a tire.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

That's next to it. And then, and then they, they. They run the chain or the rope over top the tire and then it's hooked up. Hooked up to the hitch, whatever. And then they let her buck

[Jared]

you clear the area. Because if that chain slips off, it's going death whip.

[Ryan]

Yeah. That tire could end up 100ft in the air. You just don't know.

[Tyler]

There's like another thing. They like drill holes in it and they put some sort of powder in it. Have you seen that?

[Jared]

I think that's when they light the powder on fire.

[Tyler]

Oh, is that what it is to like dry it out?

[Jared]

I got people.

[Ryan]

Smith, right? Or something.

[Tyler]

Yeah, something like that. Yeah.

[Jared]

Or like they soak the stump in gas. Like you chainsaw. Cut it up like a, Like a checkerboard kind of. So the gas can get in there. Let soak in, and then you just let it slow burn.

[Ryan]

You know what I like? I like when they just leave the stump as a. Just a natural seat so you can just sit on it.

[Miles]

Yeah. Cut it off a little bit higher up at the right height.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Are you guys in or out on chainsaw guys carving a bear into the old stump. I think they leave them higher up and then the guy comes along. And I watched a video of guy do a bear and then I looked at the comments. Instead of people being like, that's sick that you can do that. All the comments are like, so did all the chainsaw artists get together and decide the only thing they're ever chainsawing into stumps are bears? Do something else, man. Like, look at this.

[Jared]

You can't do a bear.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I was just like, oh, man, that's. If that's not proof that the Internet will hate anything.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

They're just, boo. It's like when we went to the moon twice and people like, all right, do something else. I'm bored.

[Jared]

Yeah. Where's Mars?

[Tyler]

Yeah. I'm kind of done with Internet comments. Are you? I'm skipping over them now.

[Miles]

Okay. All right, well, how's your life been since you've quit?

[Tyler]

Good. I feel, I feel like my opinion got really influenced by Internet comments. So I'm trying to avoid them all. They can be funny, but I think it's a net positive. I avoid them.

[Jared]

Yeah, we. We talked about this like month and a half ago or so.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Where it was really affecting my, my opinions on Vikings moves and TV shows. So like there's a be a Vikings would make a move and I'd be like, okay, I get that. That, that feels all right. And then I go to the comments and it was like, this is the dumbest thing a front office has ever done in the history of football. And then I'd be like, you know what?

[Ryan]

Yeah, you're right.

[Jared]

That was stupid.

[Tyler]

Right? Yeah.

[Miles]

So. Okay, well, so are you saying you're starting a. You're starting a movement called opinion maxing and you're doing this new thing called developing your own opinion on things?

[Tyler]

Yes, I it to yourself.

[Miles]

Oh, okay. Because I was going to have sheriff that further.

[Jared]

So your opinion minimizing.

[Tyler]

Yeah, just. Just done with comments.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Tyler]

Maybe like one word comments. Like, this was cool.

[Miles]

Well, I was going to, I was going to ask you if you could share any new opinions that you've developed for yourself over the last week, if you could share any of them with us.

[Tyler]

Just about anything.

[Ryan]

Just like, you know, kid show member too.

[Miles]

So like, you know, like you've probably like, think of a piece of content you watched and then tell us what your opinion you developed on your own.

[Tyler]

Well, I liked the show. This is a little while ago, the show, the foundation on Apple. And then I got into like the Reddit comments about the foundation on Apple and they're like, this show sucks, dude.

[Jared]

Reddit. Reddit quite possibly might be the number one way to ruin a piece of media you like.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it can be a toxic place. Right.

[Miles]

But what. Give me an opinion that you've developed for yourself or like, if you watch the show, what's the opinion that you said? I'm not going to go look on the Internet. This is my current opinion.

[Tyler]

Oh. Right now I'm watching for all mankind and I'm enjoying the show and I'm

[Miles]

like, and what's your opinion on it?

[Tyler]

I like it a lot.

[Miles]

Okay. Because that show sucks, Jared.

[Tyler]

No, it doesn't.

[Miles]

Yes, it does.

[Tyler]

Yeah, it's.

[Miles]

If you just. If you just think about it and be smart. If, if anyone who knows. Right guys? Yeah, Anyone who knows anything about cinema knows that show sucks.

[Tyler]

So it's TV show, bad writing.

[Miles]

That's bad actors. I mean, all the money went to

[Jared]

cgi Instead of making a quality Product.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So honestly, anyone who watched that show is kind of a dunce.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Just a bunch of surface level watchers.

[Miles]

So this world. Yeah.

[Ryan]

See, that didn't feel good, did it?

[Miles]

No, don't feel.

[Ryan]

That's the comment section.

[Miles]

That's the comments.

[Ryan]

That's why.

[Miles]

That's why we're opinion minimizing.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Keep it to yourself.

[Miles]

And you also broke your own rule. You said you were keeping it to yourself and you still told us what your opinion was.

[Jared]

That was a test.

[Miles]

That was a test and you failed.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Keep up.

[Jared]

But your opinion could be that you passed. Just keep that to yourself.

[Ryan]

But your opinion matters also.

[Miles]

But also, if you don't share your opinion, that sucks, because this is a podcast.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Pretty opinion based.

[Tyler]

I'm not gonna say anything about it.

[Miles]

Yeah, we could do it. All right. There's a new segment. The segment's called keep your opinion to yourself.

[Jared]

You ready?

[Miles]

Let's go. Let's go with. Give me a show. House of the dragon.

[Jared]

Ready?

[Miles]

Keep your opinion to yourself. Ready? Okay. How hard was that?

[Ryan]

Easy.

[Miles]

Imagine if society started doing a little bit more of that.

[Jared]

I kind of wanted to blurt it out. I'm rewatching season one and two to get ready for three.

[Ryan]

I haven't even seen it, so I don't even have an opinion.

[Jared]

You'd like it.

[Miles]

But. But that's the thing. If you're on the Internet, you've never seen it, but you'd have an opinion.

[Ryan]

For sure.

[Jared]

I would.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

That felt kind of good, actually.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Instead of opinion maxing, let's opinion minimize.

[Jared]

Let's try again. Let's keep our opinion. Government spending.

[Miles]

Are we going yet? Say go.

[Jared]

Go. That felt. That was great. That was great. You try that shit at Thanksgiving, it's not gonna go as well.

[Miles]

Yeah, you know, try that shit.

[Ryan]

Yeah, Try that shit in your Facebook status.

[Tyler]

Some of you try that in a small town.

[Miles]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Ryan]

Seriously? Yeah.

[Jared]

Try that in a big city.

[Miles]

Okay. I like that, Jared. That's kind of peak male status to keep your opinion to yourself.

[Jared]

That's true. It is peak male status to not know what someone thinks about fucking anything.

[Miles]

That's true. We all know a guy that's just like. You're like, I don't know what's going on in his head. And that's peak male status. Keep them on their toes.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Is there a serial killer or, like, the nicest guy in the world? I don't know.

[Miles]

Regardless, still peak.

[Ryan]

I'd say the only. Really, the only time I go to the comment section is if I. If I see a video and, like, I'm. I'm assuming the comment section is what I'm thinking in my head, because it's one of those types of videos, you're like, okay, this is what the. Going on.

[Miles]

Oh, my God. I saw this video and I absolutely sprinted to the comments.

[Ryan]

Yes.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Just to have some. Not even. Not.

[Miles]

It did not disappoint.

[Ryan]

Sometimes people are asking to get roasted, and to see them get roasted is kind of funny.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

There's special exceptions.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tyler]

It's.

[Miles]

Everyone's got opinions are like, everyone's got one, and they all stink. That's the phrase, right?

[Ryan]

That's the phrase.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Unless you get it bleached.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that's a good Instagram bio out for you, actually, Jared.

[Miles]

I mean, that doesn't change that at all.

[Jared]

It'll make it smell like bleach.

[Miles]

Yeah, maybe for, like, I'm guessing, like, right after you do it.

[Charlie]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Really? Have you. Have you done. Oh, well, that I did pretty quick. I totally. Actually, it kind of, I would assume, mimics the color of your sandals.

[Jared]

Maybe a bleached asshole.

[Ryan]

I would think so.

[Jared]

Maybe.

[Miles]

Is that. Is that what color those sandals are? Yeah, it did say bleach.

[Jared]

Said bleached. A's. And I was really confused. So now I get it. I told you guys this. I did.

[Miles]

How do you. Who's the first person to bleach their butthole?

[Ryan]

Like Marilyn Manson, I think,

[Miles]

right after he took his ribs out.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Suck his own dick.

[Ryan]

Who's Monroe?

[Jared]

Marilyn Monroe.

[Miles]

Do you think she's the first one?

[Tyler]

I don't know.

[Jared]

It's not a bad.

[Miles]

But just like. Do you think it was by accident?

[Jared]

You know, I was just gonna say I did it on accident one time. It was out of toilet paper. I used a Clorox wipe, and it burned like hell.

[Ryan]

Oh, that's an issue.

[Jared]

I quote, unquote, bleached my. On accident, I used a bleach wipe.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

Did it work?

[Jared]

I didn't take a peek. All I knew is that it hurt. And I was going to be way smarter than that the rest of my life.

[Tyler]

Permission to ask a stupid question?

[Miles]

Yeah, go ahead.

[Tyler]

What is a bleached. Is it like you use Clorox?

[Miles]

I. I'm guessing you can buy a kit. It's kind of, you know what I mean? You know, like, they got douchebags for women.

[Tyler]

Sorry.

[Miles]

Which. Which the original usage of the douchebag has been lost in translation.

[Ryan]

Big Time. Yeah.

[Miles]

For those of you guys don't know, I'm. I'm. I believe since the last time I checked, unless I got duped, it's a way for a women to clean their vagina, you know, and so a douchebag. A douche kit is a way. Is like a little kit that you buy to clean and I imagine that there's a bleaching your butthole kit.

[Ryan]

What's the purpose of it? Is it just to clean. Clean things up?

[Jared]

I don't know, dog.

[Miles]

I think it's. It's for aesthetic pleases.

[Ryan]

Sure.

[Miles]

It's for it to be aesthetically pleasing.

[Ryan]

Got it.

[Tyler]

I have no idea.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I. I don't know.

[Miles]

Because I think the less brown you want your, your. Your butthole further, you can get it away from poop, you know? Yeah. The last like mentally you see a brown eye down there and you just. Your brain is. Just immediately associates it with poop.

[Jared]

Yeah. You no longer have a chocolate starfish. It's white chocolate.

[Tyler]

Sure could eat off of it.

[Ryan]

Jesus Christ. Well, yeah, I don't know if you want that far. You could, yeah, you could do some

[Jared]

research for it, let us know.

[Ryan]

No, you're the one that brought. You're the one who.

[Jared]

No, I've been there, done that. I'm out. No bueno.

[Ryan]

Do you think it's something that everyone should try once in their life?

[Jared]

No, I would recommend not trying it ever.

[Miles]

Well, here's the thing.

[Jared]

It burned for like three hours.

[Miles]

We gotta. We got a percentage. I mean, I guess the question goes out to anyone. I'd love to hear in the comments if anyone has ever done this and what the experience is like. But you know, probably looking at the sisterhood of the traveling comments for this one.

[Tyler]

Yeah, we're gonna lean heavy on you.

[Miles]

We're gonna have to lean heavily heavy. And it's not because guys can't do it. It's just. I think it tends to be more of a female activity. You know, I'm not asking guys for what. What their experience has been with douchebags,

[Jared]

you know, that's fair.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that's. That's a good point. That's a good point.

[Miles]

That is the correct. What it's for, right?

[Ryan]

The D bag?

[Jared]

I'm pretty sure.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Because like it's. I. I feel like it's. Could be in territory of like. That was just like a. A rumor that went around like the.

[Ryan]

Maryland. Maryland.

[Miles]

Yeah. And then I just believed it and now I look like an idiot.

[Ryan]

Yeah. No, I think you're I think.

[Jared]

Yeah, you got it.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Nice.

[Miles]

But why does it get such a negative connotation?

[Jared]

I don't know. I can see where it's like. Because, like, what it does is it rinses it out, and then the bag gets filled with the. The clean. The rinse bag essentially.

[Miles]

Got it.

[Jared]

So, like, you just say that to a person that you don't like. Because I'm. That bag is not a pleasant.

[Miles]

Yes. It's like a carpet cleaner. It's like calling someone an ass wipe.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You know?

[Jared]

Yep.

[Tyler]

Dirt bag. Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Huh.

[Miles]

Interesting.

[Tyler]

And it rolls out the tongue. Calling somebody a douchebag.

[Jared]

It is a great insult.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

What a douche.

[Ryan]

But thinking about it now, is it really an insult?

[Tyler]

Yeah, I'd say.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I think it's usually how it's portrayed.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

It's a very PG13 insult, which is nice.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

It's not like calling someone a doucher.

[Jared]

There's levels to it. Like, doucher isn't as bad as getting called a douchebag. I think if I got called a doucher, I'd laugh that off.

[Miles]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jared]

But if someone called me a douchebag, I'm like, that hurt a little bit.

[Ryan]

What about douche? Yeah.

[Miles]

Hard. Hard D, Hard B.

[Ryan]

Started doing it.

[Jared]

It's a Ryan thing.

[Miles]

Is that what you are saying when you do that?

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Is douchebag?

[Ryan]

Potentially. Potentially.

[Jared]

The origin's lost, even in the creator's eyes.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Sometimes things evolve so much, I don't even know what the original was.

[Tyler]

Translation got lost years ago.

[Ryan]

Yeah. What about D bag?

[Jared]

That's not that bad, I don't think.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I don't either.

[Miles]

All right, let's try it out. Jared, you're such a D bag.

[Tyler]

Not bad.

[Miles]

Jared, you're such a douchebag.

[Tyler]

That hurts more.

[Miles]

That hurts way more. What about just, it hurt coming off my tongue?

[Jared]

Jared, you're such a douche.

[Tyler]

Oh, that's. I don't know.

[Miles]

Quit being a douche.

[Ryan]

That's not too bad.

[Tyler]

I think douche might be a little worse.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Miles]

What about good news? Baba gad douche. Does that one hurt? Baba gadoosh?

[Tyler]

That would make me smile.

[Miles]

Yeah. What were you gonna say, Ryan?

[Ryan]

I think it was back in high school, people call other people douche canoes.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah?

[Ryan]

You've heard a douche?

[Miles]

I've known a few. Douche.

[Jared]

Yeah. My dad says douche canoe a lot.

[Ryan]

Where does that. What's the. What's the origin of that?

[Jared]

No idea.

[Miles]

I think it probably just rhymes with Douche. No, it doesn't. Douche canoe.

[Jared]

They both have it.

[Ryan]

They both have an. Ooh.

[Miles]

Douche canoe. Douche canoe should be douche canoe.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that would make more sense.

[Tyler]

That's a great patron name. Douche canoe.

[Miles]

Yeah, that is.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it is.

[Charlie]

Huh.

[Miles]

Or people saying it's douchey. Own a canoe.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Which I don't abide by. I think owning a canoe is kind of peak male stats. Not a kayak, not a john boat. But an actual real canoe is kind of peak male status.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

It's like the least douchey of all the boats.

[Ryan]

Well. And like an oar with a paddle on one side. Two sided. Two sided. Or that ain't.

[Miles]

That's.

[Ryan]

That's. That's douchey. Okay.

[Tyler]

It's very. Try hard.

[Jared]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Ryan]

Although I will say that the. The kayaks with the pedals in them that people kayak fish off of, those are sick.

[Jared]

I disagree.

[Ryan]

Really?

[Jared]

I think the paddles are way cooler than the pedals. Like the.

[Ryan]

Make your fishing fishing.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Utility wise. Yes. It's a great idea.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

But in terms of peak male status, I wouldn't say, wow, that guy out there has got that water bike.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I wouldn't be like, yeah, it's peak.

[Jared]

To me, a pedal kayak is like the. The electronic pedal bike of this. Of the lake.

[Miles]

I mean, essentially the best way we can sum up this whole segment is if you prefer the harder way in life to do something. That's peak male stats.

[Tyler]

Yes.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

If you're searching for any sort of efficiency that isn't just not doing something, it's not peak mill status.

[Ryan]

Yeah. It's like building that patio. We use wheelbarrows instead of a tractor.

[Miles]

Status. But also driving heavy equipment. Peak.

[Jared]

Pretty sick.

[Miles]

So it's. I guess we're kind of putting a hole in this douche canoe.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

There are rare exceptions, like with most rules. Heavy equipment language. Yep.

[Tyler]

I like. Like an older movie is like when guys go to bed or sleep, whatever, they just lean back and tip their. Instead of like going into a bed, laying down. That's because

[Miles]

being able to fall asleep against a tree with just your hat tipped down like this.

[Ryan]

Yeah. That's pms. Oh. Peak male status. That is.

[Miles]

We're just pmsing on this episode. Yeah. Okay. Well, should we take a break? Jared Ryan let me wear his shady rays on the fur for this ad read.

[Ryan]

I got you hitting 4.

[Miles]

How do they look today? Jared, pull up the camera. I want to see how I look. You got me.

[Ryan]

What I got you hitting fourth in the lineup today.

[Miles]

That's a cleanup hitter. That's how I feel. God, these things feel nice on my face. I like this pair because it wraps all the way around. I gotta wear these fishing.

[Ryan]

That's the tactical.

[Miles]

I think we would have only been out there trying to catch bobber bass 30 minutes instead of a full hour.

[Jared]

You probably would have been able to spot the bobber a lot easier, too. You've been right on it. Yeah.

[Miles]

Wrapped all the way around. No sunsets getting in these eyeballs.

[Jared]

No.

[Ryan]

God, no.

[Miles]

Plus, I also like the Desert Storm color.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Tactical.

[Miles]

Very tactical. Jared, I don't feel like I.

[Jared]

You have your.

[Miles]

You have the other, like, wood grain shady rays, right?

[Tyler]

Yep. That's in my car right now.

[Miles]

Those are your daily drivers.

[Tyler]

I wear them every day.

[Miles]

I put them on the other day and I was like, I like these a lot. I think those are one of my favorites. Not that the ones you're wearing are my favorite.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

But I mean, and I. I'd say. I'd say a good pair of sunglasses, that's like almost the number one essential in the summertime.

[Miles]

I'd say it's almost better than sex.

[Tyler]

Oh, yeah.

[Jared]

Have you ever tried with the glasses on at the same time? Peak experience when you're.

[Ryan]

When you're looking like that, hitting the fourth in the lineup, hitting absolute tanks over the fence. Yeah.

[Miles]

And a pair of these glasses with some eye black underneath.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And a life jacket that are a big triangle.

[Ryan]

Yeah. John 3:16. Oh. I mean, yeah. That and wearing a life jacket to the ball diamond.

[Miles]

Yeah. You can't even fucking get out of the bulldog. Yeah. And then a fighting necklace. Yeah.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah.

[Jared]

The best part about our deal, too, is you can get his and hers. So you can both be wearing glasses.

[Miles]

That is true. Right now, if you use code YBR, you can get 50 off two or more polarized [e-mail]. yeah. I feel like I'm about to go hop in my jacked up Ford F450, head to the. Head to the gas station, grab some energy drinks and some nicotine and hit the job site on these bad boys

[Jared]

just blasting on the stair.

[Miles]

Maybe take me higher.

[Ryan]

Maybe spit on someone's boots on the way to the gas station.

[Jared]

No, no, you.

[Miles]

No, you spit on someone's sandals.

[Ryan]

True.

[Jared]

You perfectly spit into a spittoon and it makes the cool noise.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah. For some reason, this gas station has spittoon.

[Miles]

Yeah. So, guys, if you want to look cool this summer, go to shadyrays.com. they got all sorts of styles, all sorts of good stuff on there. Use code YBR for 50 off two or more polarized glasses.

[Ryan]

Great. Deal.

[Miles]

All right, Jared, what do we got?

[Tyler]

What do we have? Things that are better payment than money.

[Jared]

Hell yeah. Trident layers.

[Miles]

Sex.

[Jared]

Nice.

[Miles]

Yep. Sex is off the list.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

Because sex should never be payment. Okay.

[Tyler]

And shady raises off the list too.

[Miles]

And shady raises off the list. And any past sponsor, current sponsor or future sponsors off the list.

[Ryan]

Okay. Okay, I'll say German chocolate cake.

[Jared]

Well, now we can't get a German chocolate cake sponsorship.

[Miles]

Well, no, no, we can't definitely though. No. Because we would choose that.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Charlie]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

So if you're a German chocolate cake company out there, what's the difference between regular chocolate cake and German chocolate shake?

[Ryan]

I don't know. I think there's a. It's a pretty, it's a pretty one to one crossover between German chocolate cake and better than sex cake.

[Miles]

Oh yeah, I thought it was just maybe a smaller mustache. I didn't understand.

[Ryan]

I didn't get that. What was the joke?

[Miles]

German chocolate.

[Jared]

Okay, that is a set up to like an actual cake joke.

[Miles]

Is it?

[Jared]

Yeah, it's pretty bad.

[Miles]

So yeah, you don't have to say it.

[Jared]

Okay,

[Tyler]

guys, I know this joke.

[Miles]

I know. Let's next segment is called tell your most get canceled joke.

[Jared]

Wow. We wouldn't get canceled, but it's, it's in poor taste.

[Tyler]

Gotcha.

[Ryan]

Yeah, we just might not get renewed.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I saw German chocolate cake wasn't invented in Germany.

[Ryan]

I can believe that.

[Tyler]

I think it was like Texas or something.

[Jared]

Really fun fact.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So what, what's the difference?

[Ryan]

I don't think there really is difference. Well, but you said we couldn't say sex, so that's why I went with the cake.

[Miles]

Cake by the ocean. German German chocolate cake by the ocean.

[Ryan]

The Jonas Brothers.

[Tyler]

Jonas is a German.

[Miles]

Oh, it's named after a guy named with the last name German

[Tyler]

Samuel who

[Miles]

created a mild dark baking chocolate bar called Baker's German sweet chocolate for The Baker's Chocolate Company.

[Ryan]

1852.

[Miles]

Wow.

[Tyler]

Wow.

[Miles]

That's just a fact I don't care about at all, to be honest.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Okay, what do you guys go? All right, what's. What's a better payment than money?

[Jared]

Pizza and beer.

[Miles]

Yep.

[Jared]

It's the number one payment of all buddies that help you move.

[Miles]

Yeah, I think free time is a lot of time. A good payment. You know, it's like, you know, part of like. Because you don't get paid to be a dad. But every once in a while, you kind of. You're kind of been busting your ass with your, you know, helping with the kid, helping with the household, all that. Once in a while your wife's kind of like gives you not to like. You go do whatever.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Go golfing. Go golfing.

[Ryan]

Yeah. You've done good.

[Miles]

You know, you've been working, you've been helping, all that. Why don't you go ahead and just do whatever the you want this morning?

[Jared]

Yeah. Here's a guilt free pass to goof off.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

That's sick.

[Tyler]

I have back scratches.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Jared love a good basic back scratch.

[Tyler]

And I don't think I'm getting the. I'm getting older and I think my back's scratching or itchier. More itchy, I guess.

[Ryan]

Kind of weird, your skin getting drier with age? Maybe.

[Tyler]

Maybe.

[Jared]

Yeah. Jared's out mowing with his shirt off. He's got a leathery back now.

[Ryan]

True.

[Tyler]

I did get a dehumidifier a couple weeks ago and that's maybe affecting us.

[Miles]

I'm be honest. I thought you were about to tell us that you got a dui.

[Ryan]

You're one letter away from.

[Jared]

I did get a DUI the other day, and I think my back's itchier from.

[Ryan]

Because you would call that a de. A dehumidifier.

[Miles]

You didn't say dehumidifier. You said dehumidifier. And I thought you were going to say that you got a dewy.

[Ryan]

Yeah, me too.

[Miles]

Fun fact. I would have been nice to know off air, Jared.

[Jared]

That would have been an incredible way to break the news.

[Tyler]

Segment two.

[Jared]

Segment two. Nobody had a clue.

[Miles]

And the way you presented it. Oh, the other weekend I got a dui. That have been crazy.

[Tyler]

Yeah. No, quite the opposite.

[Miles]

You got a dehumidifier.

[Tyler]

Humidifier

[Miles]

was. If you've been noticing increasing levels of humidity in your house.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And so that's. I got a dehumidifier.

[Ryan]

Okay, nice.

[Miles]

Have you found your house is a little bit warmer because of it?

[Tyler]

Yeah, a little bit. In certain rooms where I leave it at. It's.

[Miles]

And so you may be backtracking on the dehumidifier then because of the itchy back situation?

[Tyler]

I. It might be. It's kind of like the. What was it? The giraffe story you have. What's the giraffe correlation? Causation.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jared]

The.

[Miles]

The story of the guy who's. He's standing on a city block and he's waving his red umbrella in the air, and the guy says, what the hell are you doing? He's like, I'm waving this red umbrella to keep all the giraffes away. And he says, you think that actually works? There's no way that you doing that is keeping giraffes away. And then he says, have you ever seen a giraffe on this city corner?

[Tyler]

So that's a story about causation, correlation.

[Jared]

Got it.

[Tyler]

So, yeah, I don't know.

[Miles]

I got all sorts of quotes, you know, mostly about correlation, causation, and leverage, but that's.

[Jared]

And the koala bears.

[Miles]

And koala bears.

[Tyler]

What's that one?

[Miles]

Koala bears. It's who they are. It's what they do. They eat shoots and leaves. It's a whole story.

[Jared]

Yeah, that was a long one.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it's a long one.

[Miles]

I didn't want to do it.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah,

[Tyler]

yeah. I'm. I'm enjoying my dehumidifier.

[Miles]

So what's this? What's the correlation and causation? You're wondering. You're saying that it's maybe just a correlation that you got a dehumidifier and you notice your back being more itchy?

[Tyler]

That's what I'm saying. Yeah.

[Miles]

You're saying it's not causation?

[Tyler]

Yeah, it could be that. I'm not sure which.

[Miles]

It does help.

[Jared]

It makes it an even better payment. The itchier your back gets, the better the scratches are. It's true.

[Miles]

I might have to get dehumidifier so I can get more back scratches.

[Tyler]

And it's fun emptying that dehumidifier. Just crazy how much water you get. I show my wife every time how much water we got.

[Ryan]

You ever stick a straw on it in there?

[Tyler]

Stick a straw in it? No, I haven't yet.

[Ryan]

Drink it decent. You put it through a water filter. It's not bad.

[Miles]

You drank dehumidifier water?

[Jared]

No.

[Ryan]

God, no.

[Miles]

Got it again. It's just.

[Ryan]

Not again.

[Miles]

Let's just put that on. We got to start a list for you on, like, worst bits. That's got to go on there. That's not even a good bit.

[Jared]

We use ours to water the plants every morning.

[Ryan]

That's a good idea.

[Jared]

Humidifier runs overnight, and then you just dump all that.

[Miles]

Humidifier or dehumidifier?

[Jared]

Dehumidifier runs all night. It fills up.

[Miles]

You're gonna be there a long time. If you're watering your plants with the humidifier, he's just standing There trying smoke it with it.

[Jared]

I mean, that's kind of what greenhouses do a little bit. It's more a mister than a humidifier, but.

[Ryan]

Yes, in some. In some dehumidifiers, you can get a. There. It comes with it, a little tube that the water drains out of that you can put into a flower pot.

[Miles]

We'll just do that into a drain.

[Ryan]

Yeah, we do it.

[Miles]

But I want to say there is something satisfying about emptying a dehumidifier because you feel like you're making progress where if you just have the tube, it's just going and, you know, you even think about it.

[Jared]

Yeah. Is it even working?

[Miles]

But also, sometimes when it's really humid, you got to empty that thing like five times a day or like, you forget about it and then you realize it hasn't been going.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jared]

It's humid in here.

[Tyler]

Yeah. I'm probably still in the honeymoon period with my dehumidifier because I'm still enjoying emptying it.

[Ryan]

Where do you dump it? The sink, Toilet or bathtub or outside sink.

[Tyler]

But we have used it for plants.

[Ryan]

Sure.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Exploring options sometimes, like, if you like. I feel like. Like on a really humid day, if you dump it in the bathtub, it's almost like you could just. You could just pop the drain down and take a bath. And that's. That's how much there is.

[Tyler]

Be cold, though.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it's not that cold.

[Tyler]

Room temp, I guess.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it's room temp. It's a kind of like a cold plunge.

[Miles]

No one's gonna do that.

[Ryan]

No, I'm saying that that's how much water there is and coming out of the dehumidifiers, like, I could fill this entire bath up, you know?

[Miles]

Got it.

[Ryan]

Good way to recycle water, actually.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Reduce reuse.

[Ryan]

Yeah. And we're talking about being a homesteader, being self sufficient.

[Tyler]

Peak bell, stat. Pos.

[Miles]

Would you be okay with getting your payment here at this company in dehumidifiers? Would you put it on the list of things better payment than money?

[Tyler]

I would. I would list. Emptying a dehumidifier is a great payment.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

So you would let Miles change your. Your.

[Miles]

I'll get a dehumidifier at my house, here, my basement, and you just. You come over.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Miles]

I'll let you.

[Tyler]

Once a day, I'll come over, he'll

[Ryan]

give you the garage.

[Miles]

Come multiple times a day if you want. If I don't gotta pay you.

[Tyler]

Depends.

[Jared]

If it rained, that is you paying Him?

[Ryan]

Yeah, him coming multiple times. Is you paying him? Jesus.

[Tyler]

Ryan's odd one.

[Jared]

Chores.

[Miles]

Honestly, Ryan, let's go back to you being super stressed out. I don't know if the Internet can handle. Just relax and. Right mood. Ryan. Lucy Goose Riot mor satar chores is

[Jared]

one like you do. You do some work and then for somebody and then they just do chores for you.

[Miles]

Kind of a quid pro co.

[Jared]

Exactly.

[Miles]

Is that what it is?

[Jared]

Cuz like.

[Tyler]

I think so. Yeah.

[Miles]

Quid pro co. Like quote without the te.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Is that Latin?

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah,

[Jared]

it is. But I don't know what for.

[Ryan]

What kind of chores you talking about? We talking like mowing the lawn and.

[Jared]

Yeah. Okay. So for instance, like my next door neighbor plowed my driveway all winter.

[Ryan]

Oh, we know.

[Jared]

So like I'll.

[Miles]

We know that your neighbor was coming over to your house and plowing. Oh, do we know he's like 80

[Jared]

years old, you think?

[Miles]

80 years old.

[Ryan]

I guess like you're taking care of chickens and stuff.

[Jared]

That's the other neighbor. Okay. But yeah, I take care of my neighbor's chickens. And then he came over the bobcat the other week and moved this big ass tree out of the way that I didn't want to cut up because my kids like to play on it.

[Tyler]

Do you have a stump now?

[Jared]

No, it. It's been down forever. My kids, the kids play out. They like sword fight. They pretend they're on the walk in the plank and shit. So I didn't want to cut it up.

[Miles]

Creative kiddos.

[Ryan]

They watch a Game of Thrones with you.

[Jared]

There's no pirates. Well, there is pirates, but there's. Yeah, there's no walk in the plank.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

House of Dragon. Doesn't.

[Miles]

Doesn't it In Game of Thrones, is there not a scene.

[Ryan]

That's what.

[Miles]

Someone's out on a plank on one of the ships.

[Jared]

I don't know. I think.

[Ryan]

I think there is. I think it's one of the main characters. Yeah, I think it's Jon Snow.

[Miles]

Is it not Google walking to plant Game of Thrones? Are we about to outlaw. Are we about to out cannon?

[Jared]

Josh Snow does not walk the plane.

[Ryan]

It's a main character. I feel like, oh, what the.

[Tyler]

What do I Google?

[Jared]

Ah, it's not. It's not.

[Miles]

Oh, game set it. It thinks you're googling a game. This walking the good do walking the walking the plank scene.

[Jared]

Game of Thrones, they have the drowned gods where they'll like, like tie people up and throw them in the water on the Iron Islands.

[Miles]

The Famous walking the plank scene from Game of Thrones happens at season seven, episode two titled Stormborn. During a brutal naval ambush, the pirate Euron forces his captive Theo. Theon Greyjoy, to make hu. Military choice. Walk the plank.

[Jared]

Doesn't.

[Miles]

Executed.

[Jared]

Doesn't walk the plank.

[Miles]

But he's out on the plank.

[Jared]

No, I think he does.

[Ryan]

Theon ultimately panics, freezing and then jumping overboard in the sea rather than facing Aaron's wrath.

[Jared]

Nobody walks to plank in Game of Thrones.

[Miles]

Well, we, we, we.

[Ryan]

There was the option, though.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean, now we're. Oh, wait, what's that? What's far right, Far right. Pirates of the Caribbean. God, I thought we really got him.

[Ryan]

I know.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah, I forgot. In.

[Jared]

Go back, maybe you're thinking of the veil where they throw people down. Like there's kind of a plank when they jump through that hole in the roof.

[Miles]

Game Pirates of the Caribbean, the.

[Jared]

The main girl character, Kiera Knightley. Yeah, yeah. It's a top 10 look.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's one of my favorite scenes.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

In cinema.

[Jared]

Absolute cinema parlay.

[Tyler]

It is.

[Miles]

Absolutely. It's absolute cinema.

[Jared]

I don't think Jon Snow is even ever on a boat.

[Miles]

I didn't say Jon Snow, he said John.

[Ryan]

Yeah. I was thinking main character first.

[Miles]

He's the guy that watched the show and his brain isn't even turned on.

[Ryan]

No, that's.

[Miles]

It's like Jared, you know, on a camera, if you don't have an SD card, you could take one photo, it'll show it to you for two seconds and then it'll go away. That's Ryan's brain when he's watching a show, he absorbs it for three seconds and then it's gone.

[Ryan]

I think it depends on the show. If it's a long. If it's a really long standing show, like Game of Thrones, eight seasons, I'm more likely to tune out throughout. But if it's like a hour and a half documentary, I'm locked.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Your SD card is like 2 gigabytes because you have to refresh to new, you know, retain the knowledge you have

[Miles]

to constantly reformatting your card, formatting your car.

[Jared]

I remember the boat scene now. It's hard to forget now that it's brought up.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I mean, he bangs his aunt on

[Jared]

the boat, so don't rock the boat, John.

[Miles]

Spoiler alert. Just your classic banging your aunt sitting on a boat.

[Ryan]

I think another. I think something else that's better payment than money would be like a bar tab.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Paying for someone's Bar tab.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Which is essentially money.

[Ryan]

Kind of. But yeah, drinks instead of money. Yeah, I was just pummeling beers.

[Miles]

Are you guys in or out on getting paid in pizza and beer? Because I think I'm still in on it.

[Jared]

I'm. I'm in on it. Especially if it's like a buddy.

[Miles]

Cuz here's the thing.

[Ryan]

You're not gonna. I don't think any.

[Miles]

No, you go ahead.

[Ryan]

I was just gonna say I don't think anybody is going to expect monetary.

[Jared]

No, it's not the expectment. But what if I offered you money? You would feel awkward.

[Ryan]

I'd say no. I'd say no.

[Jared]

Exactly. But if I offered you pizza and beer, we'd all feel good about it. Exactly.

[Miles]

Yes. It's the perfect. Because it's always something that I would have done anyways regardless of nothing in exchange. And so the fact that I get pizza and beer as well is like a great, like.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And it's great payment.

[Jared]

It's like genuinely one of those cases where if somebody offered you money, you'd be like, no, I'd rather have pizza and beer.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tyler]

Is there an hour threshold to pizza and beer? Like if it's. If you're working for this person more than eight hours, is pizza and beer still accept.

[Jared]

Acceptable.

[Tyler]

Is there, where, is there a line where it starts to be paid? You should be paid money instead of pizza and beer?

[Ryan]

I think it depends on how many

[Jared]

it's relationship based, I think.

[Ryan]

Okay, yeah. Or how many meals it overlaps. This job overlaps.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Over and under of hours.

[Jared]

Yeah. You need to feed me twice. If it's eight hours, I want. Yeah, I want hot dogs for lunch and pizza for supper.

[Tyler]

Yeah, gotcha.

[Miles]

Yeah. And if it's like a two day project, you just, you're basically just getting paid in meals at that point and then beers at the end of the day.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You know, it's almost like Pete getting paid in pizza and beer is just. You get paid, you get paid in every meal that the job crosses over and at the end of every single day that you're doing it, there should be a case of beer waiting.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Tyler]

Agree.

[Jared]

Yeah, I'm on board with that.

[Miles]

Meals based on meals based compensation, which is originally the first form of compensation ever.

[Jared]

That's true. Room and board and. And a hot meal you're allowed.

[Miles]

Sounds like in the tribe.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

It's kind of like prison.

[Jared]

That's how we pay them.

[Miles]

That's how people just used to live. And now we view it as Prison, you know?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

It's great perspective. Don't blink or you'll be just like that. You're.

[Ryan]

It's.

[Miles]

It's 4000 BC and you take a nap and you wake up and now you got to go to a job to get compensation so that you can buy the food. Don't blink.

[Ryan]

Here's a question for you guys. If someone offered you a hundred bucks for a job or a hundred bucks in pull tabs, what are you taking?

[Tyler]

Oh, good question. Right?

[Jared]

That is a good question.

[Tyler]

I'm doing 100 bucks.

[Jared]

Really?

[Tyler]

What kind of pull tabs are they? It dollar pull tabs, five dollar pull tabs, two dollar.

[Jared]

What's the jar?

[Ryan]

Yeah, I think it depends on what type of winners are left and how

[Tyler]

many winners are in the box.

[Ryan]

That's correct.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

So there's a lot of factors.

[Miles]

Let's go.

[Ryan]

Let's go two dollar tabs. Let's just go two dollars.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Ryan]

You to rip more.

[Miles]

Two dollar.

[Ryan]

Biggest winner is 750.

[Miles]

State of life. I think I go a hundred dollars and pull tabs.

[Jared]

Yeah, I think I would as well.

[Ryan]

Me too.

[Miles]

Because, like, I get right now, if you gave me 100 bucks to do a job, I. I'm just gonna go spend it at the gas station or something.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah. It's a tank again, like, over the

[Miles]

course of a few weeks. Yeah.

[Ryan]

I mean, you buy four or five frozen pizzas, it's gone.

[Miles]

A few for reals, a couple for real shakes. I haven't had a roller dog.

[Tyler]

I had one this weekend, a frill shake. It was bomb.

[Ryan]

Oh, my God, of course they are. I had dippin dots the other day. Dude, you know how fucking fire.

[Jared]

Dippin dots are the ice cream of the future.

[Miles]

I think we've talked about dipping dots on this podcast. Should be more places.

[Ryan]

Agreed.

[Jared]

I feel like it's a lot like,

[Miles]

why did the millennials never start a, like, a coffee shop that was like coffee and dippin dots?

[Jared]

Yeah, you're right. It is only in, like, it's at, like, ballparks or food truck type things.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

There's no two guys in a dream that want to make a dip. A dub dip and dot shop.

[Miles]

You know, it's like, why did froyo catch on? But why did. Why would. They're not like, oh, let's go to the dippin dots store and just sit down and have some dippin dots.

[Ryan]

Maybe. I. Who knows? They got a stranglehold on the market because I don't think there's any, like, knockoffs.

[Tyler]

There is, but they're.

[Ryan]

How do you make dipping dots? So it's just ice cream and bead form.

[Tyler]

I don't know.

[Miles]

I just. I want a dip and dot sponsorship, I think is what this boils down to.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I was, I was.

[Miles]

I would love to do an ad read every week for sipping Dots if we can find a way.

[Jared]

Yeah, we each have to have.

[Miles]

You're listening. If you're the listeners go to Dippin Dots Instagram page and comment and say, please sponsor you bet.

[Jared]

You're radio. That's something better than getting paid in money.

[Ryan]

Getting paid Dipping dots of Dippin Dots.

[Jared]

Hell yeah.

[Ryan]

I take a case of dip dots over a case of sports cards.

[Miles]

Now, are you guys. Are you guys a creamy Dippin Dots or a fruity Dipping Dots?

[Jared]

Creamy.

[Ryan]

Creamy.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah, the people who are ordering the. The rainbow dipping dots.

[Jared]

Well, they're.

[Ryan]

Yeah, my kid. Yeah, that's. Those are the ones he had.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Tyler]

What the.

[Miles]

You doing what?

[Tyler]

Yeah,

[Jared]

the. We have an ice cream shop just down the street.

[Miles]

Even like in middle school, when you go to the. You go to the game, there'd be dipping dots. There would be kids who would still order the rainbow ones instead of the cookies and cream one.

[Jared]

Those are the kids that were still eating glue when you were juniors in high school.

[Ryan]

Yeah, like, I think I. I think

[Miles]

I stopped the kid who eat chicken nuggets every day.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I think I stopped eating sherbet when I was about like eight or nine years.

[Miles]

Have you ever. Have you had sherbet recently, though?

[Ryan]

Not recently.

[Miles]

It does hit.

[Tyler]

It's good.

[Ryan]

No, because it's the same. It's the same thing. Sherbert and fruity Dippin Dots thing. Yes. Dude, I just had them last week. The fruity ones. That's one of my kids. That's the ones my kid got.

[Miles]

Yeah, I know, I know that they're like technically the same thing, but I'd have. I'd rather have sherbet over the rainbow dipping dots.

[Ryan]

Really?

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

I might have to swing through. Give me a.

[Miles]

But that's the thing. Where can I swing through and get dipping dots? I'm saying Redhawks. Yeah, that's where I had him. Jared, I gotta. You gotta take me out to the ball game just to get a goddamn thing of dipping dots.

[Ryan]

Oh, now I have happily paid nine bucks for like four ounces. Like the big cup is like a four ounce cup. The small one is two. I think it's like, it's.

[Miles]

It almost feels like the owners of Dippin Dots are actively Trying not to get their product out there.

[Tyler]

They don't want to make money.

[Miles]

Yeah, it's. It's like they're trying to just make the same amount of money till the end of time.

[Jared]

Well, they're. They're time travelers. It's the ice cream of the future. They came back, gave us the recipe, then bounced. They didn't have any of the tools to explain.

[Miles]

Or they're. They're intentionally putting a governor on their product because it is the product of the future where if they build up too much buzz now, then everyone won't be interested in it in the future.

[Jared]

Yeah. It could cause some sort of butterfly effect and then Dip and dust is no longer the ice cream of the future.

[Miles]

That's true.

[Jared]

If we get burnt out of it now, people aren't gonna. There's not gonna be a demand for it later.

[Miles]

Or we find out that when we make all these robots that robots like actually love Dippin Dots and that's. We like, oh, that's what they meant.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Their fuel.

[Miles]

But yeah, if. I think it's. I think it's peak. Peak. You betcha. If we can get a dip and dot sponsorship. It's on my. It's on my bucket list. My ice cream bucket list is to get a different. You saw the wheels?

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Yep.

[Ryan]

Can you see if they sell them in bulk anywhere?

[Tyler]

Dippin Dots.

[Ryan]

Or do they even have a website dipping down? Because I think they've had the same flavors for the last 18 years.

[Miles]

Roll. There's red, white, and boom. Now.

[Jared]

Oh, it's ice. They did a collab with Icy from

[Miles]

the gas station, so they're still doing collabs. But I can't fucking buy it anywhere in Fargo other than the Redhawks game.

[Ryan]

Oh, you got. You got to take yourself out to the ball game. What's that, cookie monster?

[Tyler]

I. Dr. Pepper.

[Miles]

And for those of you that I. I guess I never even thought about this. For those of you who don't know what Dippin Dots is, it is the ice cream of the future where it's just like freeze dried. It's like, I don't even know how they do it. Due to significant increases in shipping volumes nationwide, some shipments packages have been delayed by shipping carriers while we take steps.

[Ryan]

Oh, God.

[Miles]

Please be aware that these delays may result in some shipments being melted.

[Ryan]

And it's not Tippin Dots anymore.

[Jared]

It's just ice cream.

[Miles]

It's just ice cream. That's.

[Ryan]

That's terrible.

[Miles]

Melted ice cream.

[Jared]

But then you can just sell that ice cream to the Actual ice cream shop.

[Ryan]

That's true.

[Miles]

If they can't get this shipping thing figured out, they're going to be the ice cream of the. Of the past. Huh. I. I just. I wouldn't even know where to go buy it.

[Ryan]

What kind of.

[Tyler]

Should I accept the cookies on this website?

[Ryan]

Except all.

[Jared]

Only if it comes with the cream.

[Miles]

All right.

[Tyler]

What's her thing?

[Miles]

580-785-8104 is.

[Tyler]

Fargo. What the.

[Miles]

We can't.

[Jared]

Did they lose it at the Redhawks or what?

[Miles]

But anyways. Yeah. How would you guys describe Dippin Dots? They're like little frozen tiny pellets of ice cream.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I don't know how they.

[Jared]

They stay frozen way longer than regular ice cream.

[Ryan]

Yeah. It's almost like if you.

[Miles]

And then when it melts, it's just like regular ice cream.

[Tyler]

I do like them a little melted.

[Ryan]

Oh my God.

[Miles]

Dude, do you ever. I used to eat out of the middle and then because you're holding it the outside, it would stick to the outside and it would melt a little. And then you get to scrape it off the edge.

[Tyler]

It's a great bite.

[Ryan]

Oh, that's a phenomenal bike. Half and half. It's half melted. Half dippies. Dippy dos.

[Tyler]

We gotta do that.

[Ryan]

We might have to head out to the ball game tonight, boys.

[Jared]

Hey, you said that five bucks general admission.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah. Cheap tickets.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

We just climb the fence.

[Miles]

Yeah. Instead of calling it the ballpark, let's just call it the Dippin Dots park.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I'm going to the dipping Dots location.

[Jared]

I got tickets to get Dippin Dots tonight.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Five dollar ticket and an 182 ounce dipping.

[Jared]

For people that know the Red Dogs are a basically semi pro baseball team in town.

[Ryan]

I shoot the T shirt gun there.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

For those who don't know baseball is a sport.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And for those that know sport is an activity that people compete on a scoreboard. And for those of you that don't know what a scoreboard is, it's where you keep track of the points for

[Ryan]

either team in said sport.

[Miles]

In said sport. If you're looking for a definition of sport, refer back to. To previous pages.

[Ryan]

Yes.

[Miles]

Rewind about 30 seconds.

[Ryan]

If I could get a. Like when I go to Dairy Queen, I can't get anything smaller than a medium blizzard. My body just won't let me.

[Jared]

I get minis now because too much.

[Ryan]

I know. It's the cost of a tank of gas for a mini.

[Tyler]

Really?

[Jared]

What do you mean?

[Ryan]

I'm kidding.

[Miles]

I don't know what that Bit is. I don't know what that bit is.

[Ryan]

It's not a bit. I'm just saying. I'm just saying. Blitz have gotten really expensive. Oh. Even a Mini is the cost of a tank again.

[Jared]

Yeah. I thought you were saying that you won't have anything less than a medium because you want that much ice.

[Miles]

I do, but that's a terrible reference point because right now everyone's saying that the tank of gas is super expensive.

[Ryan]

So is the Mini.

[Miles]

So you're saying it's doubly expensive because, you know, like, in the past when. When there's been times when gas hasn't been expensive, people would be like, oh, it's just for the price of a tank of gas.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Do you know what I mean?

[Ryan]

Yeah. No, I'm saying that the Mini Blizzards are expensive.

[Miles]

You know, it's like a tank of gas. It's like comparing a price of something to a stock that goes up and down.

[Tyler]

Mini Blizzard's like Nvidia.

[Ryan]

I guess.

[Miles]

I'm not sure the confusion or like Bitcoin.

[Ryan]

It's like, you know, I'm relating one expensive thing to another expensive thing at this moment. So if you listen to this episode in like, say, a couple years, gas back down, then that's an interesting.

[Miles]

But that's what I'm saying.

[Ryan]

That's an issue.

[Miles]

But. And this is the podcast of the future, Ryan. But they call it the podcast.

[Ryan]

That's why Dipping Dots might not have tomorrow.

[Tyler]

And we're also the coldest podcast for Deputy.

[Miles]

We are true. Everyone knows this about us. We're the coldest podcast in all the Midwest, and we're the podcast of the future.

[Ryan]

And we got Chuck the. The Iceman Liddell.

[Miles]

I mean, it's a backer. All. All roads are pointing to Dippin Dots at this point. There's got to be one person that works for Dipping Dots to listens to this podcast.

[Jared]

I mean, we got glicks on the horn. Yeah.

[Miles]

Freaking glick.

[Ryan]

I mean. Yeah. Sorry. I don't know. I don't remember where the.

[Jared]

The. I would say I only eat minis because Dairy Queen ice cream makes my. My guts rumble.

[Ryan]

Me too.

[Jared]

So that's why I just get minis.

[Miles]

That's not Dairy Queen's problem. That's just a. You guys probably.

[Ryan]

Yeah, we don't want to believe that, though. That's the thing. You don't want to believe it.

[Jared]

Ice cream shop a mile down the road for me.

[Miles]

Also, on top of that sponsorship, we also want to get a Dairy Queen sponsorship. So just cool it on that. It makes you sick.

[Jared]

Yeah, cool.

[Ryan]

No, it doesn't make us sick.

[Jared]

I'm old now.

[Ryan]

I also preface this whole conversation with I can't get anything smaller than a medium because I'm crushing DQ ice cream.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Ryan]

Regardless of how my guts feel, and

[Miles]

I know I said that it sounds like we're working on a Dairy Queen sponsorship.

[Ryan]

We aren't, nobody.

[Miles]

But it's just like those that if. If Dairy Queen, you know, came and slapped something on the table, I'd be like, don, let's do it.

[Tyler]

I mean, we do have good kid of the week.

[Miles]

That is true.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

You still get your name up the counter still likes a good ice cream cone.

[Miles]

The price of ice cream cone this, these days is like the price of one Bitcoin

[Ryan]

on today's present. Present day. Today. Yes.

[Miles]

Yes.

[Tyler]

If you're listening to the future, it's 2026.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

June 8th.

[Miles]

Also, welcome back to the past. And also good to know that we made it to the future because we're kind of saving our whole reputation on being the podcast of the future.

[Ryan]

I think we could do a little R D with the Dippin Dots with the cups, because a lot of it tends to spill over, especially when children are eating it all. Half of it spills over higher walls. Big time.

[Tyler]

Build the wall.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

Jared, I know that they.

[Ryan]

Again, political today.

[Jared]

You were on it.

[Miles]

I do think that they have experimented with pouches.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I think I got a pouch a long time ago. It's been a long time since I've had the pouch.

[Miles]

I'm just saying that they. I think they've tried different approaches.

[Ryan]

I mean, there's just no. There's just no way they could have been like, wow, we tried all these approaches, but this is still the best option right now.

[Miles]

You know, just the option where we overflow the cup and it goes everywhere.

[Ryan]

Yeah. It's like they're wasting product.

[Jared]

You know, maybe that's what they want. Somebody gotta go buy more.

[Ryan]

Exactly.

[Tyler]

Oh, good point.

[Miles]

Or it's a psychological thing. They give you a tiny cup and then overflow it and you feel like you're getting way more. Yeah.

[Tyler]

Plus it's better for the gram, too.

[Ryan]

That's true. Okay, here's a question.

[Jared]

Look bigger.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

You've talked about. You've talked about rewards, rewards systems, rewards points. You're not a big rewards guy.

[Miles]

I just. It's a lot of work. It's like a second job.

[Ryan]

What if Dippin Dots had rewards? Would you. Would you. Would you Partake DDR.

[Miles]

And what would be the rewards system?

[Ryan]

Buy, not buy, buy. 100 ounces, get 10 ounces free.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I might participate. Can I just do a punch card?

[Ryan]

That's what. That's what it would be.

[Miles]

Because I'm in. I think the. The moment that I had to log in for a reward system, that's where I was out on reward systems. I don't know if that makes sense to you guys.

[Ryan]

Makes total sense, but the.

[Miles]

This, you know, I. I do like the reward systems where you maybe just type in your phone number and it's. And it's lickety split. And then if you type it in, they're like, oh, you got a free sandwich, then great.

[Ryan]

Right.

[Miles]

But as soon as they're like, you just need to scan this QR code and then scan your receipt into this app and then log in and forget your password and then have to do the verification through the email and all this other receipts.

[Ryan]

I have that too.

[Miles]

Hate that.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I'll just.

[Miles]

Just let. Give. Give me a punch card. Or let me just put my phone number in and you guys keep track of it.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah. In fact, I'll just keep my punch card at the Redhawks game.

[Tyler]

Game.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Just hide it.

[Ryan]

I'll just put. I'll get to know. I'll tell the guy because I'll be there every night for the game.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

And I'll just say, hey, keep this with you. Keep it safe. I'll be back tomorrow night. Another home game. So

[Miles]

do we. Do we have anything else?

[Tyler]

Jared? I don't have a fun fact.

[Jared]

Yeah, you already gave us one today. I guess German chocolate cake was invented in Texas.

[Miles]

Okay, well, let's. What's going on?

[Tyler]

I've been slacking lately on the fun facts. It's bad.

[Miles]

You haven't been. I mean, I haven't been slacking me any fun facts.

[Ryan]

That's our communication platform.

[Miles]

It's our communication platform.

[Jared]

Communication. For those who don't know, that's a little.

[Miles]

That's a little business org joke for you. Those. Those in corporate America will be rolling on the floor laughing right now.

[Ryan]

Oh, just wait till they see these Q3 projections.

[Jared]

Just make sure that we check off. Getting that joke done on todoist

[Miles]

every. Every Friday at 5. I really slack off.

[Tyler]

Nice.

[Ryan]

Quite literally

[Miles]

every time. Every time Jared's like, hey, I need to have a conversation with you. I go, hey, just give me a little slack.

[Ryan]

Cut me a little slack.

[Miles]

Cut me a little slack. God damn it.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Thanks, Ryan.

[Ryan]

You're welcome.

[Miles]

Well, yeah, well, I mean, what's. Is there a deeper thing that we need to solve here that's just maybe the fun facts not getting done? And again, it's like one of those things that I think you just forced upon us. Like, I don't know if we sat down and said, hey, let's do a fun fact, you just kind of started ramming it down her throat. So

[Jared]

your fun fact next week should be a clip of Miles being like, hey Jared, I'd really like to have a fun fact every week.

[Miles]

Yeah. So like I, I've been just force fed fun facts for how many episodes now. And so like, I guess not having a fun fact I don't think is going to ruin my week or anything like that.

[Ryan]

But.

[Miles]

But I may be just curious at what happened.

[Tyler]

You know, there's a few factors.

[Jared]

Fun factors or any fear?

[Miles]

Any fear. That's a factor a little bit.

[Tyler]

Just. I don't. I'm running out of fun facts.

[Jared]

You've gained too much knowledge from the fun facts that the facts are no longer fun.

[Miles]

See, yeah, you are. You just. Are you maybe considering rebranding the segment to just facts?

[Tyler]

Might be. Potentially. Because I googled fun facts on my computer and all those links are purple. Like I've been on them all the time. So you guys dry.

[Jared]

Just get chat GPT to do it and then all. Instead of you. You just have to fact check the fact that the AI gave you.

[Tyler]

Right? Yeah, I have to do that.

[Ryan]

It doesn't have to be anything crazy. Just like, just how many locations does Dippin Dots have nationwide?

[Tyler]

That seems like a tough one to find.

[Miles]

I think you just run their way.

[Ryan]

I would. If you just type that in Google, I bet it would give you an answer right now. Let's look that up for the fun fact today.

[Miles]

Okay. It's like, like there's never been a time to do. There's never been an easier time to do a fun fact segment in history other than right now. Because of artificial intelligence.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Like all the negatives. All the positives. So one thing that has definitely improved is our ability to find fun facts as a society. And Jared acts like he's got to go to the library and thumb through the encyclopedia to find fun fact.

[Tyler]

But there's also like repeat facts. I have to be careful with that too. I don't want to repeat facts because that's like the worst that you could do, Jared.

[Ryan]

We would never know.

[Tyler]

But the comments know. I won't look at the comments.

[Ryan]

You don't look at the Comments, dude.

[Miles]

But also, you do need to read the comments for part of your job. So let's not, you know, Divots has.

[Ryan]

I'll let you read it because you're the fun fat guy.

[Tyler]

Dippin dots has over 22600 permanent locations across the United States and more than 22,000 points of presence.

[Miles]

See, that's what pisses me off.

[Ryan]

Me too.

[Miles]

The points of presence thing really irritates me. The pop? Yeah, yeah, the pop.

[Jared]

They're in grocery stores.

[Miles]

But, like, just let me. You know, like, you drive through a town and then. And then you drive by a gas station and you see a big sign that says bait. You're like, oh, I can get bait out here if I need to. I need a sign outside every. Every one of these 22,000 locations that they have dipping dots. I don't even know they're in there. What, am I going to rifle through 22,000 points of prep points of presence to find them? I need. I need to know where they are and if you're. Yeah. So

[Jared]

I'm rattled by it saying that you can buy them at grocery stores. I have never seen them at a grocery store.

[Miles]

Me either.

[Ryan]

Maybe I just don't spend enough time at grocery stores.

[Tyler]

Yeah, it's probably in the freezer section.

[Jared]

That's. I'd guess. Yeah. It being the. The foods of the future section.

[Ryan]

You can franchise Dippin Dot. Dippin Dots franchise costs, fees, profit, and data.

[Tyler]

Where you see that?

[Miles]

So I can buy it. Franchise. Pop it Up.

[Jared]

Up.

[Tyler]

This is a podcast. Oh. Whole thing.

[Miles]

Dipping Dots is a powerhouse of an ice cream brand. H. All right.

[Ryan]

Huh. Interesting.

[Miles]

What's the. It says. What's the difference? Franchise model never being anywhere ever.

[Ryan]

Initial investment 120k to 350k.

[Tyler]

It's a lot of bones.

[Ryan]

You gotta have a net worth of 250k. $80,000 cash requirement.

[Miles]

All right, are we gonna have fun fact next week, or do you want one?

[Tyler]

Sounds like you're kind of out on fun facts.

[Miles]

Well, no, I just. I showed up one day, and then you just put these shackles on me. That was fun facts.

[Jared]

I'm pretty sure you requested this.

[Ryan]

We're just getting rammed on our throat

[Jared]

like you, Jared, maybe.

[Miles]

I knew I had. I had fun facts all the way down my throat.

[Jared]

Let's. Let's take. This is probably what happened. Jared shows up with a fun fact one day, and Miles. This is what Miles said, probably almost verbatim. No, Jared, that was actually pretty fun. I think we should do this every episode and then we have been ever since.

[Tyler]

Very likely that's how it.

[Miles]

Yeah, I. I don't think that's what happened. Ryan, what do you think happened?

[Ryan]

I just think we've been getting rammed down our throats.

[Tyler]

So are you in or out?

[Ryan]

I'm in on him still, though.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Jared]

He likes it.

[Miles]

No, I mean, I think the thing is, now you've also. It's like. It's like an animal getting taste of human, you know? And then it's like, oh, well, now all of a sudden, berries and twigs don't taste good anymore, and so they just want to kill and eat humans. Right. I've acquired the taste to end the episode with a fun fact. And so now it just feels like this episode is incomplete. And I'm. The rest of my day, I'm just gonna be like, am I still podcasting? Am I gone?

[Tyler]

Gotcha. You know, it's like a pavlog dog. You need to know when the episode's over.

[Miles]

Yeah, it's kind of like that, but. All right, well, we'll see. Tune in next week to find out if there's a fun fact or not.

[Ryan]

Yeah, good point.

[Tyler]

You guys can give me, like, a topic that might make it easier.

[Miles]

Yeah, we'll just do your job for you.

[Jared]

Jared, do you want to. I'll give you a fun fact right now. This is actually kind of fun.

[Miles]

Okay, but Jared's a fun fact.

[Jared]

Are you gonna be upset, or am I saving the.

[Ryan]

And we already had one because we looked up dippin dots locations.

[Tyler]

You can do whatever you want.

[Jared]

Yeah, go. Okay, the word podcast is the. The origin.

[Miles]

The ipod.

[Jared]

No, it is from a mashup of ipod and broadcast.

[Tyler]

Just.

[Miles]

Jared would have known that I knew that, and he would have never said that.

[Ryan]

That.

[Tyler]

Okay, you got to foresee that, Tyler.

[Miles]

You gotta foresee that. All right, here we go. Well, why don't we try. Tyler's the new fun fact guy since he seems to be jamming fun facts down.

[Jared]

I was just trying to help you.

[Miles]

All right, so, Jared, you're off the hook.

[Ryan]

Turned on you.

[Jared]

Yeah, he did.

[Ryan]

He turned on you. He came over to our side.

[Miles]

Hey, you're off the hook. You're off the fact. Okay, if you're fine with that, sure.

[Tyler]

It could be a vote you guys can vote on.

[Miles]

Well, no, I think we. I. Tyler seems to be pretty eager beaver to come up with these fun facts.

[Jared]

Just trying to save my friend.

[Miles]

And I think he said earlier in the podcast that he thinks he can do it better than you did.

[Jared]

Whisper than Anything I did, I do. I'm. I am going to use chat GPT for them.

[Ryan]

Of course. Why wouldn't you?

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

All right, well, here we go. Next week will be the. Will be the first time Tyler brings fun. Fact of the day. Does that stress you out, Jared? Does it feel like taking your bra off after a long.

[Jared]

You look stressed.

[Tyler]

It's the more so bra.

[Miles]

Oh, you want. Yeah. All right. Tyler's in.

[Ryan]

I can believe that.

[Tyler]

Hey, we could try it out.

[Ryan]

A lot of legwork. Fun fact.

[Miles]

You're like the. We're in a baseball game right now, and you're the starting pitcher. You did a good job. You only let up one run, and now we bring in. There's a relief pitcher. That is Tyler.

[Jared]

I only have to pitch for a couple innings.

[Tyler]

So this analogy. I don't have a no hitter going.

[Ryan]

I mean, give it a run through seven. Those deep.

[Miles]

I mean, you're sweating like. You're sweating like a pig.

[Ryan]

Yeah, we got to score to win anyway.

[Miles]

Go get some ice on that arm. Go grab some bench. Grab some Gatorade. You done good, good. You're done good.

[Ryan]

Get a quick run in.

[Miles]

All right, Tyler, we're up 2 to 1. Don't this up.

[Jared]

Okay?

[Miles]

And then I think we know where this is going. Yeah. When Tyler inevitably lets up another run.

[Ryan]

I'm coming in the game.

[Miles]

Chewy, it's chili time.

[Ryan]

I'm coming in. I'm making the run from the bullpen.

[Jared]

Johnny Fireman.

[Ryan]

God's gonna cut you down. It's gonna be playing.

[Tyler]

Who's the guy with the nut cup?

[Ryan]

Eddie Gordon, second base. Now our.

[Miles]

Our.

[Ryan]

Our bullpen is in left field, but I'll. I'll run to center, and then I'll run to the pitcher's mound.

[Miles]

No, you gotta go second base. Adjust your nut cup.

[Ryan]

No, I know. That's what I'm saying. But instead of taking a diagonal at second base from left field, I'll go to center, and then it comes straight in.

[Tyler]

I like that.

[Miles]

I just can't believe we can't. There's no. There's no video of this on the Internet ever.

[Jared]

Do you think that it maybe just isn't. You just made it up in your mind?

[Miles]

Why would I make up such a specific thing?

[Ryan]

See, I would think that too. But there's also no video of just him at second base at all. You know,

[Jared]

maybe it's a different pitcher.

[Tyler]

Were you at, like, Taco Bell?

[Ryan]

There's only one every day, Eddie.

[Jared]

You're right. But maybe it was somebody Else that was adjusting the cup on that day.

[Miles]

Yeah, I don't know. All right, Tyler, you're up next week.

[Jared]

Okay. Any topic requests or is it freebies?

[Miles]

Give me a fastball right down there. Just give me a. Me too. I don't need anything cute. I just. I just want my dick blown off.

[Ryan]

We just want to watch a fastball right down the. For strike three. Ring me up as loud as you can so that the old people in the back can hear it.

[Miles]

I want you to fact me next time.

[Jared]

Okay?

[Ryan]

Just like that.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Ryan]

And I want the strikeout called too.

[Jared]

Well, a pitcher doesn't call the strikes. You guys gotta do that. You gotta decide if it's a strike or not.

[Ryan]

I know you're the. I know you're the pitcher throwing the fastball on the. And you're also the umpire making the strike three goals.

[Jared]

Hey, everything's just like.

[Miles]

You clearly don't even know how this fact thing works. Tyler, come on, man.

[Jared]

So I get to judge my own fact if I'm pitcher and umpire?

[Tyler]

Well, we were abs. Yeah.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Miles]

And the listeners are abs. Listeners are abs, which stands for automatic.

[Tyler]

Actually don't even.

[Ryan]

Automated ball system, something like that.

[Miles]

Automated anti Lock brakes, Ballistic system.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Abs.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

All right. That it. Jared. Thanks for tuning in, folks, to another episode of you Bet your Radio. Have a great week. We'll see you next one. Oh, you betcha. Yeah. Yeah.

[Tyler]

Oh, crap. Forgot again.

[Miles]

We're done. We're done.

[Tyler]

Wang hung low. Miles, I swear I will hold a Patreon rebellion if you don't force Ryan to go to the Ryan meetup at the Mall of America. He 100% does not have any real work to do.

[Miles]

When is. I've been getting so many messages about this. I'm also getting sent news clippings of the Ryan meetup at the Mall of America.

[Jared]

Yeah, it's coming.

[Miles]

I mean, I will.

[Jared]

I'll.

[Miles]

I'll pay for a trip down there for him. I don't. And then Jake could probably just shoot Ryan there at it, don't you think?

[Jared]

They won't let him in. We gotta have someone named Ryan to shoot.

[Miles]

Well, then I guess we'll just give Ryan a GoPro.

[Tyler]

Ryan. Step right up. Ride the Ryan coaster one night before the Ryan baseball Classic. Join Ryan meet up for a Ryan takeover at the world famous Mall of America.

[Jared]

First meet in the malls rotunda renamed the Ryunda for a huge Ryan party. The Ryan's will parade to Nickelodeon Universe and set the world record for most people of the same name. To consecutively ride a roller coaster could

[Miles]

be part of history. Along with all the other Ryans.

[Jared]

Yeah. It's arrive at 6:30 no later than 7:15 to get your name tagged July 24th.

[Miles]

Okay so we got time to convince

[Tyler]

him and it's on a Friday.

[Miles]

Sorry, he doesn't have work.

[Tyler]

He doesn't have work.

[Miles]

He doesn't have work.

[Charlie]

It's on a Friday. So all these right. This isn't a Ryan meetup. It's a Ryan who can get off on Friday meetup.

[Tyler]

That's at 6:30.

[Jared]

The final sentence in in all caps. No Brian's allowed.

[Charlie]

How many lady Ryan's do you think will show up to this?

[Jared]

I don't know.

[Miles]

Think about that.

[Tyler]

How would it be? R I A N?

[Charlie]

I don't know spelling. Did they say? Is there a spelling?

[Miles]

I mean I don't think they're actually going to turn anyone away. I do you imagine if they.

[Charlie]

I think that whole concept replies on them turning non Ryan's away.

[Tyler]

It might be illegal for them to do that.

[Jared]

That's spelled with a Y in every single one of their.

[Miles]

I'm with you. I would love for Ryan to go to this. It's total. You guys need to hammer him, not me.

[Tyler]

Right.

[Miles]

Because I'll pay for a hotel room for him if he wants at the Mall America. The Mall of America. I'll give him a food voucher for Margaritaville and or Rainforest Cafe.

[Tyler]

Just put your name in the front. Just, just tell me right at the Margaritaville.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah. I'll leave his name.

[Jared]

I'll call ahead the reservations under Rya.

[Miles]

And also it's not better if it's Ryan S. Yeah. The amount of Ryan S's. Ryan Schaefer, Ryan Solem,

[Tyler]

Smith Johnson.

[Miles]

So I mean don't come at me. What was that? That said that?

[Tyler]

Who was it? Wang Hung low.

[Miles]

Don't come at me. Wang Hung low. You need to start hammering Ryan because I'm on board. I want Ryan at this Ryan meetup.

[Charlie]

Is there a miles meetup?

[Miles]

No, we, we just don't have that fragile of an ego that we need to have our own meetup.

[Jared]

He also spells aware too so it would be the other mile.

[Miles]

Very niche.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

International miles meet up with a Y and it would be like 10 people.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And half of them would be into anime. People would think it was like a furry convention. I feel like. So yeah you guys. I don't know how we hammer them but you guys need to hammer him.

[Jared]

It'd be a shame if someone leaked his phone number. I won't.

[Miles]

Mean jar.

[Jared]

I didn't do it.

[Miles]

Put a dollar in the mean jar.

[Jared]

It didn't do it. For real. You can DM me for Charlie.

[Miles]

You could start your own Charlie meetup.

[Charlie]

Charlie meetups. I was thinking of doing a video of like things people say when they find out your name. Charlie. Because it's Charlie bit my finger Charlie, where's your chocolate factory? Charlie, Charlie. You know, and they do Charlie the unicorn. And it would just be me standing there and then like someone coming out of every other door, like, Charlie bit my finger. You know, right the wrong Charlie.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Charlie]

Does that seem like a good video or stupid?

[Jared]

You are limiting yourself to just people named Charlie to enjoy that.

[Charlie]

Or at the same time, do I not expand my audience? Think about all the non Charlie's that have no idea about this Charlie.

[Jared]

It's Charlie awareness. Charlie, what you're trying to do.

[Charlie]

Well, it's connecting the Charlie and people like.

[Miles]

Yeah. And I would. I would say that, you know, not everyone's named Charlie, but everyone knows someone named Charlie.

[Jared]

That's true.

[Charlie]

And they've all done the Charlie bit my finger.

[Miles]

Yeah. And maybe it's there. Like it's, you know, they're now looking in the mirror going, maybe I shouldn't say that to Charlie anymore.

[Charlie]

Yeah, and you shouldn't.

[Miles]

I do not. Charlie.

[Jared]

Yeah. My kid's name is Charlie.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie]

What do people say when you say, oh, you named your kid Charlie? That's so cute.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Most people think it's Charles, but it's not. Yeah. We just straight up Charlie.

[Miles]

Did you.

[Jared]

Yeah. Wow.

[Miles]

How do you feel about that? Yeah, I mean, are you Charles?

[Charlie]

Yeah. I'm in.

[Miles]

Charles. Yeah.

[Tyler]

That's your government name.

[Charlie]

That's my government name.

[Miles]

Charles.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Charlie]

Robert Barrons.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Charlie]

There's no St. Charlie.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Chuck Bob.

[Jared]

He wasn't named after the.

[Ryan]

That's very funny.

[Miles]

Actually, Chuck Bob should be your alter ego.

[Charlie]

Old Chuck Bomb Barons.

[Miles]

This whole time you've been Chuck Bob or Chuck Burt.

[Jared]

Yeah, Chuck Burt.

[Tyler]

Chuck Bird Bears.

[Miles]

Chucky Burt Barons.

[Charlie]

And goes by the nickname Chucky Bomb. Chucky Bombs.

[Miles]

Chucky Bomb.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Chuck Bob.

[Tyler]

Chuck Bob Barons.

[Charlie]

All their tubing out there.

[Miles]

Chuck. Chuck Bob Barrons. Does sound like a guy who would own a brandy company.

[Charlie]

Oh, Chuck Bob.

[Miles]

Yeah, Chuck Bob.

[Charlie]

I thought he was saying Chuck Bomb.

[Miles]

No, Chuck, You're. You're Charles Robert Barons.

[Jared]

That's what you should call your Barron's Brandy Pre Mix shot. Chuck Bombs.

[Charlie]

Chuck Bombs. Yeah, there we go.

[Miles]

Up.

[Charlie]

Chuck Bombs.

[Miles]

If you have too many no, we were talking about. We're talking on the belly up today that you want to get into the Mezcal for Barons. You could do Chuck Bob. Mezcal.

[Charlie]

I do not want to get in the Mezcal.

[Miles]

That's what you said.

[Charlie]

No, you don't listen. That's not what I said. Where's the new screen job?

[Miles]

Over here. We still got to paint it, but that'll happen.

[Charlie]

Open there at the bottom, though. Is it?

[Miles]

No, no. Where? Oh, okay.

[Charlie]

Oh, okay. It's open. Miles. I can see outside it right now.

[Miles]

Yeah, I'm not wor. Where that. Oh, no, yeah, the screen. I got to still staple. We talked about that. But down here is where it was the issue.

[Charlie]

Oh, okay, okay, I see, I see.

[Miles]

No, yeah, I'll staple that shut. No problem. I see, I see.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Miles]

You know, am I getting Chuck bobbed right now?

[Charlie]

You're getting a little Chuck, Bob. You didn't fix the problem. You told me on the other podcast that you had fixed this, resolved it.

[Miles]

I did. There was an inch and a half gap on the bottom of this door. Oh, I'd have to see a good four. Huge compliment. He even noticed that part of the door because it just looked like it was part of it.

[Jared]

Seamless.

[Miles]

Even though it's a completely different color.

[Jared]

See, I told you it didn't matter. That guy didn't paint it.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

All right.

[Miles]

It looks nice. Looks nice.

[Tyler]

Charlie, if you ever have a roast, will be called a Chuck Roast.

[Miles]

Chuck roast.

[Charlie]

Yeah, that'd be good.

[Jared]

J was really waiting for the door to get door shenanigans to finish so he could flip that in.

[Miles]

Coming up with a good bit.