Seat Wars: Booth VS. High Top 🎙 #308

Summary

You Betcha Radio Podcast Summary
Episode: Seat Wars: Booth VS. High Top 🎙 #308
Release Date: January 8, 2025

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Introduction and New Year Greetings

The episode kicks off with Miles welcoming listeners back to "You Betcha Radio," proudly labeling it as "the coldest podcast in all the Midwest." [00:00] He introduces the regular co-hosts, Ryan and Jared, noting that Tyler is taking the evening off. The hosts exchange New Year greetings, setting a festive tone for the episode.

Notable Quote:
Miles [00:00]: "Welcome back to another episode of You Betcha Radio podcast. The coldest podcast in all the Midwest."

Locked Keys Fiasco on New Year's Eve

The conversation swiftly shifts to discussing memorable New Year’s Eve experiences. Jared shares a story about attending a friend’s house where another couple accidentally locked their keys in their car. The situation escalated as they had to retrieve a spare key from their home, adding an extra hour and a half to their evening.

Notable Quote:
Miles [02:05]: "So basically just added like another hour and a half to their evening. New Year's Eve."

Restaurant Woes: Ordering and Bread Delays

The hosts delve into the common frustrations of dining out, particularly focusing on delays in food service when ordering salads or appetizers. Jared reminisces about a dinner where they forgot they hadn't received their meals yet, leading to a humorous discussion on portion sizes and ordering strategies.

Notable Quote:
Jared [04:39]: "But what if you order a side salad or a soup and have it come out before your meal, do you think they intentionally delay your meal a little bit so you have time to eat your super salad?"

Prize Picks Promotion

Miles introduces a promotional segment for Prize Picks, encouraging listeners to sign up using the code "YBR" to receive a $50 bonus when playing their first five-dollar lineup. The hosts share their picks for the week, showcasing their engagement with sports betting.

Notable Quote:
Miles [13:32]: "And so that gets people to keep coming back."

Main Segment: Worst Apps for Spotify Wrapped

In a humorous and creative segment, the hosts brainstorm which apps would provide the worst possible Spotify Wrapped experiences. They suggest menstrual cycle tracking apps and fast-food ordering apps like McDonald's, imagining absurd and cringe-worthy summaries of user activities.

Notable Quotes:
Miles [15:51]: "I would say right off the bat, the apps that the girls use to track their menstrual cycle."
Jared [18:46]: "You consumed 480 chicken nuggets this year. Your heart has to be fried just like all of our french fries."

Merchandise Promotion

Following the main content, the hosts promote their merchandise available on their website, "youbetcha.com." Miles highlights his favorite hat, describing its appeal and encouraging listeners to purchase to "ooze sex appeal" at bars.

Notable Quote:
Miles [56:07]: "It's best seller, bestseller for a reason. You know, it looks good, feels good, makes me feel good."

Segment: Guess the Sound

The episode features a playful "Guess the Sound" game, where Ryan plays various sounds, and the hosts attempt to identify them. The segment showcases their camaraderie and quick wit, though not all sounds are easily identifiable, leading to humorous confusion.

Notable Quotes:
Ryan [63:03]: "Guess the sound. Okay, so I'll go one by one, and you have to guess the sound."
Jared [69:05]: "It sounded like a cornhole bag hitting a board, and I just... Oh, wow."

Fun Facts

In the Fun Facts segment, Ryan shares intriguing trivia, such as the oldest verified person ever, a French woman named Jean Louis Calment who lived to be 122 years old. The hosts engage in light-hearted banter, adding humor to the informative content.

Notable Quote:
Ryan [77:03]: "The word robot was introduced in 1920 in a play by Carol Capek called R.U.R. or Rossum's Universal Robots."

Closing Remarks

As the episode winds down, the hosts reflect on their ongoing goals, such as selling their merchandise and maintaining engagement with their audience. They encourage listeners to support them on Patreon, where additional exclusive content is available. The episode concludes with light-hearted discussions about facial hair and humorous anecdotes, leaving listeners entertained and connected.

Notable Quote:
Miles [82:18]: "We'll talk about it once we sold. Job's not finished. Job's not finished."

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Episode Highlights:

• Time Management for New Year Greetings:
  Jared [00:32]: "How long do you say Happy New Year until you stop saying it to people?"

• Humorous Take on Food Portions and Appetizers:
  Jared [04:39]: "I forgot we hadn't gotten food yet. So it was whatever food came out."

• Creative Marketing Ideas for Merchandising:
  Jared [11:22]: "They could have free bread and create unique bread-based dishes."

• Engaging Interactive Games:
  Ryan [61:19]: "Let's do that. Yeah, I like that nut button."

This episode of "You Betcha Radio" masterfully blends humor, relatable stories, interactive segments, and promotions, ensuring a rich and engaging experience for both regular listeners and newcomers alike.

Transcript

[Miles]

Welcome back to another episode of you Bet yout Radio podcast. The coldest podcast in all the Midwest. I am Miles, the you betcha guy here with Ryan the T shirt guy. We are live. Tyler has the evening off and Jared's here. Jared, hello.

[Ryan]

Hello.

[Miles]

Happy New Year, Jared. Did we do that last? No, we did Patreon.

[Ryan]

Yeah. First regular episode.

[Jared]

Happy New Year.

[Miles]

We haven't regularly regular episode podcast since last year. It's been so long.

[Jared]

Been a year.

[Miles]

How many, how much mileage can I get out of that joke?

[Ryan]

Well, here's the next question. How long. This is an old question, but how, how long do you say Happy New Year until you stop saying Happy New Year to people?

[Miles]

I think, I think by the end of this week. So what? Middle of middle of January, you really got to taper off. You can't be doing it.

[Jared]

Yeah, I was January six today. I was going to say. I was going to say no more than seven days into the.

[Miles]

Well, I'm. It' so it's, it's. No, it's more so for me. It's. I guess I'm not, not whipping out Happy New Year a lot. It's more so like, how was the holidays? I'll ask that until middle of January.

[Jared]

Yeah. Did you have a good New Year?

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

[Jared]

Yeah, I. I get it.

[Miles]

Yeah. So, Jared, did you have a good New Year?

[Ryan]

I had a great New Year.

[Miles]

What'd you do?

[Ryan]

I watched Andy Cohen on and Anderson Cooper New Year's Eve. That's pretty fun.

[Miles]

Did you.

[Ryan]

Yeah, they're funny.

[Miles]

I went over to some friend's house for New Year's and as we were all leaving, the other couple that was there, they locked their key in their car. But I didn't find this out until after it left. Like we all were kind of leaving. They were getting their kid all, you know, bundled, bundled up to go and we had left. And then we get a message from them being like, we locked our keys in our car and the car didn't have enough service to where the gal couldn't unlock the car with her phone.

[Ryan]

Oh, really?

[Miles]

It's like, you know, you have the app that you can just unlock for. It wasn't working. So they were literally locked. So then they had to take the people's house that we were at their car, home. This is late at night, drive, get their spare key, drive all the way back. And this is like a 25 minute drive one way.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Drive all the way back and then drive home. Home again. So basically just added like another Hour and a half to their evening. New Year's Eve.

[Jared]

Those are situations where, like, I would get so. I get so. I would get so tense that I would. I would just. I wouldn't talk because I'm already pissed off that I got to make it like an extra hour out of the way. Was it the phone or the vehicle that didn't have the service?

[Miles]

No, because they have WI fi. It's just like, the car was not connecting to whatever satellite it was.

[Jared]

Huh. They should have threw it neutral and just pushed her down the driveway just to see if they. Honestly, see if they could catch a bar or two.

[Miles]

See, I. If I'm the guy in that scenario, I'm. I'm obviously upset right away. But then, like, that whole ride, I'm like, kind of like, laughing, like, can you believe that we did this?

[Ryan]

Right.

[Miles]

Yeah. This is so dumb.

[Jared]

This is a New Year's we'll never forget.

[Ryan]

Exactly. Yeah. You can only go up from there if it starts so shitty.

[Miles]

True.

[Jared]

Right? Yeah.

[Ryan]

It's a great way to start.

[Jared]

End the year.

[Miles]

On that note, I'd be like, new Year, same old me.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Getting into these hijinks.

[Jared]

Yeah. New Year, new year, new car. You got this brand new car you're driving that you just got to give back 30 minutes later.

[Miles]

But the other. But if you're the person that. You're watching this happen to someone, that's where I'm like. I don't know what to say. Right. So if you had locked your keys in your car and you were clearly upset about and had to, like, do all this driving, I would just be sitting there, like, don't say a word.

[Jared]

Yeah. You. You do as much as you can to help, and then you're just. You're useless after that. You know, Saying anything won't. It won't help. It just won't.

[Ryan]

Just dead silent.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

I. I'd be so tense in that. Especially late at night. I'm just. I gotta get some sleep. Hey, I'll come back. I'll bring your car back tomorrow morning, so.

[Miles]

Yeah. But how was your New Year's, Ryan?

[Jared]

It was. It was good. When I went out for dinner with some friends. Nothing too wild. Had, you know, had a couple. Yeah. That was the. That was the last before I'm. I'm on my journey to get hard for 75 days.

[Miles]

Oh. Yeah.

[Jared]

That was the last night that I was kind of able to drink.

[Miles]

That is true.

[Jared]

It tasted good. Had a couple, two tree. And then I called her a night at, like, 10:45. But we, we got to the restaurant at 7:30 and three hours later we got out of there. And after about an hour and a half after we had ordered our food, I then just realized where the our food at. And there was probably only like 50 people in there total, so I wasn't quite sure. Luckily it was good conversation, so I just forgot we ordered. I forgot we hadn't gotten food yet. So it was whatever food came out. And I'm like, whoa, I could eat six of these plates. It was a damn. You know, you get like the little tiny, like fist, like fist size serving. I'm like, well, I should have ordered like three appetizers in the meantime to just hold me over. Yeah, so it was a, it was a, it was good.

[Miles]

Do you guys think that your food comes out later if you order a side salad or an appetizer?

[Jared]

I don't know. That's a good.

[Miles]

Right? So like, if you're. Look, it's more, less, less an appetizer because you do that first and then you order. But if you order a side salad or a soup and have it come out before your meal, do you think they intentionally delay your meal a little bit so you have time to eat your super salad?

[Jared]

I don't, I don't think so. Because if there's other people with you that didn't order super salad, then you're just delaying. You're. You're just, you're on the verge of pissing them off because it's taking too long.

[Ryan]

I think it's a crapshoot because sometimes your salad comes out like 10 minutes before your food comes out. And then sometimes it's like two minutes right before.

[Miles]

That is true.

[Ryan]

So I think it's just a total crap.

[Miles]

Depends on the, depends on the restaurant.

[Ryan]

That's how much we, the waiters smoked and forgot.

[Jared]

That's true. Yeah.

[Miles]

Or the cooks. Or the cooks.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Probably more the cooks.

[Jared]

More the cooks. Yeah. But that is the worst in the back.

[Ryan]

That is like the most helpless feeling is when your food takes forever because, like, nobody talks at the table.

[Jared]

I know.

[Ryan]

I was looking at their.

[Jared]

Everyone's hungry. You've already eaten like four baskets of bread.

[Ryan]

You keep like looking at like the back of the kitchen.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

You just look at the back kitchen till you see that the waiter sees you looking at the kitchen. Because you don't want to be like, hey, where's our food?

[Ryan]

Right.

[Miles]

So you just have to do the most passive aggressive approach and just be like. And maybe like a. That's not ours. Do one of those.

[Jared]

Yeah, you got to mix some body language. Some not negative body language, but some sort of body language to show like.

[Miles]

You know, that is also the worst feeling in the world when you are really hungry and you see a plate of food coming your way and you're like. And then it just keeps walking by and you're like, damn, it's one of these.

[Jared]

It's like, yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

Or like, oh, yeah, not ours.

[Jared]

Or you sit down. Like, let's say there's a. You have a table of four, and then somebody next to you comes 10, 15 minutes later, table four. And they get their food before you.

[Miles]

Oh, God.

[Jared]

It's, it's, it's honestly like a dad tightening up a ratchet strap and be like, that ain't going anywhere. Like, can anyone. Can anyone not say, God, we order before they did.

[Miles]

They.

[Jared]

They already got their food.

[Miles]

And then there's always someone at the table. It's like, ah, it must be your steak that's taking.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

They turn against each other.

[Miles]

Yeah. Well, if you wouldn't order that, that salmon.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Then, Then would already have it out here.

[Ryan]

I heard the chicken tenders real, man.

[Jared]

They had to overnight it from Alaska.

[Miles]

And who orders salmon in North Dakota? Come on.

[Ryan]

Just coming off, Cisco.

[Jared]

Yeah, that's always a Debbie Downer. But if they got free, like, free bread. I mean, I, I, that. But that's also the thing. You don't want to fill up on bread.

[Miles]

I do.

[Ryan]

Guilty.

[Jared]

And I normally.

[Miles]

I absolutely love filling up on bread.

[Jared]

I normally do as well. But I'm also like, ah, maybe I should hold off on that so I got room for my meal.

[Miles]

You know, that's what I'd like to do, but I can't. I just, I just love bread too much.

[Jared]

I know, I know. Me too.

[Miles]

Like, why aren't we just. Why don't they just have like, a restaurant that's just all. It's only bread.

[Jared]

It's called bread bar.

[Miles]

You know, like, they got pasta places. They got, you know, ramen plate. They got all the, they got all the carb places, macaroni and cheese. Why don't they just have a place that has garlic bread, peanut butter, and jellies, you know?

[Jared]

Like, I, I think, I think that already exists, just in different form. Called a bagel.

[Miles]

Yeah. You know, but like an. But like, you know, I know what you mean.

[Jared]

Yeah. They could just get sliced bread. Like, you know, you got like a wheat. Your honey wheat.

[Miles]

It's only appetizers and it's just all different forms of bread. You got dinner rolls with cinnamon butter. You got, you know, the sourdough bread with butter.

[Ryan]

I think the closest restaurant would be Panera.

[Miles]

Yeah. Probably with the bread bowls with the soup.

[Jared]

But they only have one kind of bread, I think.

[Ryan]

Closest one, I would say.

[Jared]

Sure.

[Miles]

Yeah. Like, you got Cheddi. Basically. Basically, if you just took all of the free bread from all of the restaurants and put it into one restaurant.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah. You got cheddar, because the bread's the.

[Miles]

Cheapest thing for restaurants to do. So you're gonna have low overhead.

[Jared]

Yeah. You got, you got Cheddar's. You got Texas Roadhouse buns.

[Miles]

You got Olive Garden breadsticks. Yep. Sourdough bread from the fancy restaurants. The, the brown bread. I don't even know what bread it is. Do you know what I'm talking about?

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

I don't know. Whatever. It's just like, it's just. Yeah. Like a dark rye bread. Throw that in the mix. Yeah, could have. If it's morning, you got bagels, you got toast, you got all of it.

[Jared]

You got the guts from Herbert and Gerbert's.

[Ryan]

Just the guts.

[Miles]

Just the guts.

[Jared]

Yeah. They quit giving the guts to customers. They just start selling them to the bread bar.

[Miles]

100.

[Ryan]

You can serve all this bread at a bre bowl.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah. In a bread bowl from Panera.

[Miles]

You don't even got to wash dishes if you're the, if you're the staff dishwasher and you don't need silverware. He's going to eat bread with your hands.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

Could have Texas toast, you know.

[Jared]

Yeah. You can maybe even get like a monkey bread.

[Miles]

And then. Yeah. And then desserts. All the best desserts are bread, cinnamon rolls, lemon bread. Lemon bread. All of it.

[Jared]

I. Yeah.

[Miles]

I couldn't be more on board. This is just up there with air mail.

[Jared]

There's add. I mean, there's add ons, too. There's like little salmon slices or what. What? I don't know.

[Miles]

We just call it. The restaurant is just called the Bread Basket. And, and all your bread comes in a basket and that's it. You know, I like that. And then, you know, they, Then you. There's a challenge to get your meal for free. They. They rifle a football at you at 80 miles an hour right in your bread basket. And if you catch it, you get maybe not a full meal, but just like 15 off. Yeah. And that's the thing that gets people to keep coming back. Yeah.

[Jared]

And then the, the, the like the leftovers. The leftover deal is just a bread bag.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Toss everything in there. It's half. I think it's half. It's a half baked idea.

[Ryan]

There you go.

[Miles]

See what you did there? There will be some full baked bread though.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

Not just half baked.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

And no gluten free options either.

[Jared]

No. God, no.

[Miles]

I don't know how we would do that.

[Jared]

Yeah, well, the whole place is contaminated with gluten.

[Miles]

It does cut some, some customers out, but that's also fine.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You know, there's people who are allergic to shellfish. They. They just don't go to Red Lobster.

[Ryan]

It's the cost of doing business.

[Miles]

Put that on the, on the balance sheet.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Or whatever it's called. Yeah.

[Jared]

And then like when you're talking numbers and stuff, like end of year, core end a quarter or whatever, you can just say like, did we get that bread or not a bread jokes out there.

[Ryan]

Gets a laugh once a quarter.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

I mean that's all it is. Just a bread basket. That can be our bread and butter.

[Ryan]

Oh, there we go.

[Miles]

Call me butter because I'm on a roll.

[Jared]

Sweet roll.

[Miles]

All right, guys, time to talk about our prize picks. Picks of the week right now. And right now you could sign up with code YBR and get $50 instantly when you play your first five dollar lineup. You don't need to win your lineup to receive the 50 bonus. It's just guaranteed. So sign on up, use code ybr. That's what we did.

[Jared]

Yes.

[Miles]

And I tell you what, last week didn't go as planned, but I mean, who is going to plan that the Vikings were going to play that bad.

[Ryan]

Yeah, nobody.

[Jared]

My pick hit last week. So.

[Miles]

Yeah, because you didn't pick the Vikings. But this year, this week's. This week's our week, boys. So Jared, what do you got this week?

[Ryan]

I have James cook, more than 55.5 rushing yards.

[Miles]

Kevin, what does Tyler have got?

[Ryan]

Justin Jefferson, more than 89.5 receiving yards.

[Miles]

I have Derrick Henry, more than 99 and a half rush yards.

[Jared]

And I got.

[Miles]

He had 137rush yards last time he played the Steelers. So feeling good. It's kind of hot right now.

[Ryan]

It's a beast.

[Jared]

I got lad McConkey more than 71 and a half receiving yards.

[Ryan]

That's.

[Jared]

That's an absolute lock. He's a good player, if you guys are wondering.

[Miles]

So guys, if you want to roll with the boys, because this is the week.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

The bandwagon.

[Miles]

It's get on the bandwagon. Derek Henry, more than 99 and a half rush yards. McConkey, more than 71 and a half receiving yards. James Cook, more than 55 and a half rush yards. And Justin Jefferson, more than 89 and a half rush or receiving yards.

[Ryan]

Big Tyler Jes.

[Miles]

So, guys, once again go to prize picks. You're running out of weeks in the NFL season to play prize picks, so you got to go check it out. Use code ybr. Oh. Anyways, Jared, what do you got for our first segment?

[Ryan]

What would be the worst app for a Spotify wrapped?

[Miles]

Yes. I mean, every. I feel like every app's got it now. I don't know if you feel that way. Prize picks has got it. Spotify's got it. You know, you're seeing it all over the place. But what would be.

[Jared]

There are some apps that I'm glad don't have it.

[Miles]

That's. It's true. What would be the worst app for Spotify Rap. I would say right off the bat, the apps that the girls use to track their menstrual cycle.

[Jared]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like end of year rap is like, you had. You went through 11 cycles this year. It's like, what the. There's 12 months. Like, what. What's going. What's going on here? Am I, am I. Am I pregnant?

[Miles]

You were. You were late. Your. Your period was late 17% of the time.

[Ryan]

You know, that's how the app tells you that you're pregnant and wants to wait till the wrapped so you share with your friends.

[Jared]

Yeah. Not a bad idea.

[Miles]

You. You. You bled for 98 days this year.

[Jared]

We could really use you at. As a blood donor.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it's like different levels. You reach this level.

[Miles]

That would be wild.

[Jared]

You disposed of 622 tampons this year and you flushed zero down the toilet.

[Miles]

Good for you.

[Ryan]

Wait, how's that?

[Miles]

Do they track their tampons?

[Jared]

I have no idea. I have no idea.

[Miles]

I don't know Even know if 600 tabons in a year is even remotely close to how many.

[Jared]

I have no idea.

[Miles]

I have no gauge.

[Ryan]

We have too many. They're not enough.

[Miles]

That's true.

[Jared]

That is true. Very true.

[Miles]

Yeah, they have like, you know, they like, give you, like, nicknames.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Like, year, this year, you were a super bleeder.

[Ryan]

Or like you were a big red machine.

[Miles]

Or it's like they're pregnant that year and it's like, we missed you this year. Please come back.

[Jared]

They should start calling you Clifford the big red dog.

[Miles]

You ovulated 12 times this year. You horny little girl. You horny little gal.

[Ryan]

Bakers does it.

[Miles]

So that would probably be an app, I think. I don't need a wrapped at the end of the year.

[Ryan]

You. You know, sure, though, like, they've had company meetings.

[Miles]

They're like, should we do around 100?

[Ryan]

They threw the idea around and they could.

[Miles]

There's some joke in there about, like, you had 12 periods this year. Good job on wrapping it up. Let's wrap up your year. Like, you wrapped it up all year long.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

What else would be a bad app for a Spotify rap?

[Jared]

Nah, I'm. I'm gonna go with the McDonald's app.

[Miles]

That's what I was gonna say. Yeah.

[Jared]

It's like, Congratulations, you consumed over 100, 000 calories this year off of our app. So you don't need to tell me that. You don't need to tell me that. I have a hundred thousand points in the app where. And I can buy. I could buy McDonald's right now with the amount of points that I have.

[Ryan]

Or it says how many, like, trans fats or whatever.

[Jared]

Yeah. You consumed 1 million trans fats this year. 1 million grams of trans fats.

[Miles]

That's literally exactly what I wrote down. Was McDonald's wrapped 100,000 calories this year. I wrote that down.

[Jared]

Not only are we wrapping up your year, but, man, did we really wrap up your burgers this year.

[Ryan]

Here's the nearest cardiologist. You're a heartbreaker.

[Miles]

You consumed 480 chicken nuggies this year.

[Ryan]

That is 200 chickens.

[Jared]

Your heart has to be fried just like all of our french fries.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I don't think I want to see that. Like, and then they'd be like, like, late night snacker. You went to McDonald's 34 times this year after midnight. Like, God, now I got stats on how often I got shit faced, which is. Which is down 40% from last year.

[Ryan]

You're like, let's go.

[Miles]

Like, let's go New Year's resol.

[Jared]

Trying to do the math. It's like, well, I guess recreational marijuana was introduced last year, so that would make sense. You know, we all got our feet wet in year one. Year two, we're down 44%. You. Yeah. You didn't visit the inside of our store one time this year because you're too lazy to get out of your vehicle.

[Miles]

I think. I think another app that you. You wouldn't want is your imessage.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah.

[Miles]

You didn't respond to 1,450 messages this year.

[Ryan]

You gave out 500 thumbs ups.

[Jared]

There are 122 people that you clicked in and clicked out of immediately.

[Miles]

There is. There was 42 group messages you muted this year. You sent 680 shitty memes this year. Only 4% of them were funny or elicited a haha response.

[Jared]

You plot. You plastered 4,082 thumbs up on messages this year. I can tell, we can tell. You just weren't in the mood to talk.

[Miles]

You talk about 86 of your buddies. None of them seem to be particularly upset because they didn't talk to you again afterwards.

[Jared]

Oh, that's a good one.

[Miles]

Yeah, I don't think I want to revisit all the messages I've sent. No, you're, you're, you're. You're sent to receive nude ratio was. Was a little off this year.

[Jared]

Feeling down about yourself.

[Miles]

You sent 5,438 nudes and only received 200.

[Jared]

But like, it would say like pictures.

[Miles]

Of a few and then it's just. Shooter's gonna shoot.

[Jared]

That's what I was just gonna say.

[Miles]

It's an eggplant emoji.

[Ryan]

Eggplant emoji use was up.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You fired off 4000 u up texts and got a total of 23 responses. You do be. That would be, that would be funny if, if imessage. You know how like you send someone happy birthday, there's confetti that comes down.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Be funny if you sent like you up text and like eggplant emojis and water droplets just fall from the top of the screen.

[Jared]

That would be awesome.

[Ryan]

Just gotta play it cool.

[Miles]

Oh, sorry, my friend hacked my phone.

[Ryan]

That's supposed. Ready?

[Jared]

Yeah, it's like the old FA. Like the old Facebook statuses back in 2008.

[Miles]

Hacked.

[Jared]

Hacked by whatever girl in your class.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So that may be not an ideal one.

[Ryan]

No, Might be a bad one.

[Miles]

You got one, Jared?

[Ryan]

Yeah, I would say the Touch Tunes app would be bad because I don't want to know how much money I spent on Touch Dunes. And, and yeah, Brooks, I've played.

[Miles]

Yeah, you, you played. You had your song skipped 420 times. Apparently people don't want to listen to Billy's got his beer goggles on.

[Ryan]

Right, Exactly.

[Miles]

They kind of do that. They do show you your top plays, I suppose.

[Ryan]

Yeah, they do.

[Miles]

They do a little bit. Which is nice when you're trying to just quickly choose a song that you like. But what I don't like is if I haven't been on the Touch Tunes app in a long time. It's, like, almost a little cringy to see what you were listening to a year ago.

[Ryan]

Gives you, like, anxiety a little bit.

[Miles]

You're like, oh, God. I was playing that in the bar.

[Jared]

It wasn't that big of a banger.

[Miles]

I played. I played Timber by kesha and Pitbull 300 times last year.

[Ryan]

I think I'm gonna go home, guys.

[Miles]

Yeah. God. Oh, it's. It's weird. My. My Touch Tunes app isn't working. Can someone else jump on?

[Jared]

I'll shoot you a Venmo.

[Ryan]

Other one I have is the. The books app. Because I don't use the books app. So just tell me. I haven't read all year.

[Miles]

I did think about that. Like, the apps that would be like. Or like, the people who have, like, water tracking apps. Being like, you were a piece of this year. You didn't log any water.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Ch.

[Jared]

Thousand. You drank 1,000 ounces all year. You should be dead.

[Miles]

You didn't read any books this year. Good luck having Alzheimer's someday.

[Ryan]

You probably can't read this.

[Miles]

That's why we also have it in audio form.

[Jared]

Oh, that's good. To this day, I still have never downloaded the Touch Tunes app.

[Miles]

Really?

[Jared]

I just. I put my faith in other people.

[Ryan]

That's a good move because it's way too easy.

[Jared]

Yeah. How much does it cost per song?

[Ryan]

That's a great question. I don't even know.

[Miles]

Like a buck or something.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Ryan]

It's too much.

[Jared]

And can you pay extra to skip?

[Miles]

Well, you can pay extra to jump the line.

[Jared]

Gotcha.

[Miles]

But if someone else paid to jump the line, you don't jump in front of them. Should be a bidding system. They make so much more money. Throw 20 bucks on to play a song right now, drunk people would be all over that.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jared]

Imagine if you're back in your college. Your college town. It's like, the boys are back in town.

[Ryan]

Or the boys will fall.

[Jared]

Or the boys will fall. Like, no, no one's gonna let you in the touch tunes. Like, I'll throw.

[Miles]

Or we Damn boys.

[Jared]

There we go. Or just Boy by Lee Bryce.

[Miles]

Yeah, boy.

[Jared]

He got up here.

[Miles]

I don't know.

[Jared]

I don't know the words either. That's all.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it.

[Miles]

I think another app that would. That would be not awesome is Chat GPT. You know, like. Like, basically Chat GPT would tell you that, like, you have a. You're kind of a smart alec. You were rude to me 420 times this year.

[Jared]

Did your parents not teach you manners?

[Miles]

Yeah, it's like. It's like basically just scolds you for your. You're. You mistreating AI.

[Ryan]

Am I talking to my wife right now?

[Miles]

And then he's like, see, that's what I'm talking about. I should actually, after this, I should see if my chat GPT will give me a 2024 wrapped.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I bet it works. It does say, like, memories update sometimes when you type it.

[Miles]

I'll have to try it out.

[Jared]

On that same note, the Alexa app would probably be an app that I don't want to get. Oh, yeah, Review of you told me to offend off 82 times.

[Miles]

Also, Alexa's just listening at all times, so gonna be like, you. You were mean to your wife, your microwave. You have an anger issue.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You use a lot of words that I'm not programmed to say. When you stub your toe on the corner of the furniture, you're like, that is so invasive.

[Jared]

You turned your back 15 times to your wife and proceeded to cuss her out verbally.

[Ryan]

He talks shit about Jeff Bezos five times.

[Miles]

You are now a target. You had sex 13 times in the living room and 20 times in the bedroom. Also, you make strange noises.

[Jared]

Let's recap.

[Miles]

No, no, no. You know, like, it'll, like, swipe over and, like, kind of give you a title for the next thing. It's. That part's just called Post Nut Clarity. That would be incognito mode on. On your browser. I would not want to get a wrapped for that. And I don't think we need to expand on that.

[Ryan]

You've got incognito 360.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

You. You moved your Alexa device into the bathroom 61 times.

[Miles]

Moved it into the bathroom. Oh, I get it. Yeah. God. You guys got any other ones?

[Ryan]

I did the Find my iPhone app. I'd just be laying.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

It's like, you found your iPhone.

[Jared]

Yeah. You traveled a total of 10 yards total away from your iPhone this year.

[Miles]

Yeah. That would actually be shocking. What was actually the farthest I was away from my phone.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

And then. Yeah. If you were to lose your iPhone, it's like Your iPhone traveled 8,000 miles this year.

[Ryan]

Yeah. So overseas.

[Jared]

Yeah. There's been times I forgot my phone at. At home. Going to, like, I don't know, running an errand or something. Yeah. So it's like, ah, whatever. I'll get it and get it later.

[Miles]

My dad is the biggest offender of that. That guy. If we are addicted to our phone, he's the opposite of addicted to his phone. He. He'll leave it everywhere he goes. Like, even when we were, like, we went pheasant hunting.

[Jared]

Just left it in the shop.

[Miles]

We were just in the shop. And of course I'm like, I see it there. And I'm like, go up to him like, hey, forget anything? He's like, what do you mean? I just, like, hold it up. He's like, did it again. He'll just leave the house without it. He'll. He'll go out to dinner without it.

[Jared]

Yeah. See, my dad purposely leaves his at home.

[Miles]

Oh, really? Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

That's. Maybe we got. Maybe that's. Maybe that's a new resolution. 1. Start with once a month, I just leave my phone at home for dinner.

[Jared]

Well, it should be a feature on the iPhone. You know, like the. Those little buzzer, like the. You know, like the gum dispenser that shocks you when you try and pull out a piece. They should have that for the iPhone. Every once a month, you have to keep it in one place for, let's say, two hours. Otherwise, you're getting shocked. Not a bad idea.

[Miles]

Yeah. If you touch your iPhone, you get shocked.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I bet someone could invent a case that does that.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I don't.

[Miles]

What.

[Ryan]

Or if you, like, probably will be r. Yeah, it's probably off market overseas.

[Miles]

You could just buy the shock pens at the. At the joke shop. Why couldn't you just buy a.

[Jared]

You could, like, and it's like the power, like, the. The on off button to where, like, if your phone is meant to stay on the nightstand from whatever time to whatever time, and you hit the on off button, it'll shock you.

[Ryan]

I got a better one. What if, like, every time you touch it, it plays, like, really loud porn?

[Jared]

That thing is staying way away from me.

[Miles]

It's, like, sitting over on the counter, and someone's like, is this mine? You're like, no, tackle them.

[Jared]

It's like lost in the. In the blankets on the couch, and your kid finds it.

[Ryan]

Put that down.

[Miles]

Sorry. I have. I have moaner turned on on my. On my phone.

[Jared]

Yeah, it's an iPhone feature. I didn't download an app or anything. Just on the phone already.

[Ryan]

It's spelled MNR.

[Jared]

Yeah. I.1 honorable mention for me was Teemu. You guys ever been on Teemu?

[Miles]

I have not. I. I just. I. Teemu to me is like. I. I don't know how I describe how I feel about it.

[Jared]

Well, I think Teemu and tick tock shop are one thing I think. I think that one is disguised as the other because you find the same products on there. But the reason I thought of that was, like, if they gave me like a 20, 20, 2024 wrapped for Timo would be like, you added 100, 000 items to your cart this year, but you didn't buy anything?

[Miles]

Well, it's like, I feel like it's just. It stresses me out because it's just another app that people are blowing all their money on for just the dumbest.

[Jared]

It's just. It's junk.

[Miles]

I do. Would. I would like to buy one of those personal skid steers on there, though.

[Ryan]

Yeah, the excavator thing.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

I. I know a guy. I know a guy who bought. Who bought a couple of them, and they're junk.

[Miles]

Do they work, though?

[Jared]

These were the mini excavators. They were like five, six grand a piece. It was the boys out in DL.

[Miles]

Yeah. They did a video. I didn't watch it, but they're way.

[Jared]

Smaller than I think. What people realize. I don't know, like a playground, but kind of.

[Miles]

But did they work?

[Jared]

They worked.

[Miles]

I don't. Of course they're gonna be junk. It's a backhoe for five grand or whatever. Of course it's going to be dog.

[Ryan]

That's a lot for a back.

[Miles]

But does it work?

[Jared]

I would say it works.

[Miles]

No, you're confusing a back alley.

[Jared]

Yeah, I would say for practical needs. Yeah, it would work. Smaller jobs.

[Miles]

Like, if I had to just like, do a little bit of trenching.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You know, like, if I'm just like, I need to trench this right now or by sprinkler.

[Jared]

Yeah, no, I think. I think it would work. I also think they only go, like, 0.2 miles an hour, so.

[Miles]

Well, where you got to be going?

[Jared]

Why. But who wants to be. Let's say you got to drive from the front yard to the backyard. It's like, all right, I'll see you tomorrow morning.

[Miles]

I don't know.

[Jared]

Inconvenience, I think.

[Ryan]

One mile per hour.

[Jared]

So true. That's very true. Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah. Even 0.01 miles per hour, five minutes.

[Jared]

You could get to from the back to the front yard in about an hour, let's say.

[Miles]

No, because your. Your yard is not a tenth of a mile. It's probably 0.2. So you're looking at 2, 5 minutes. I don't know. Miles per hour.

[Jared]

A half hour.

[Miles]

It's a lot of math.

[Jared]

Carry the one anyways.

[Miles]

You're getting it done.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah. I think for that type of. It would work fine. But.

[Miles]

But yeah, like. And again, at some point this year, it seems like it's every year she's gonna be like, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna plant a garden. Nice to have one of those, you know, dig up some dirt, let her plant it, then let them all die and be like, see, I told you that wasn't gonna work.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah. Then you can throw it on Facebook Marketplace and see if you can get rid of it.

[Miles]

Yeah. I always go like, do you want a garden or do you like the idea of having a garden?

[Jared]

The idea of having.

[Miles]

And so far she's been truthful, Been like, I think I just like the idea of having a garden more than I want it.

[Jared]

That's good.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

At least she's self aware because the idea is actually kind of fun. But then once you have a garden and you're like, wow, it's.

[Miles]

I'm just in the weeds now.

[Jared]

Correct. Yeah.

[Miles]

Literally.

[Jared]

Yep. Like I am. The hose that I had attached to my house didn't even reach the garden. So I, I'd have to stand like 15 yards away and just like angle that baby at a 45 degree and try and hit the tomatoes in the back corner of the garden.

[Miles]

So I mean, you could have just got a watering can.

[Jared]

Yeah. But then I'd had to fill, I'd had to walk back and forth, fill the water.

[Miles]

You would have had a better chance of.

[Jared]

Actually probably longer, but you know, I.

[Miles]

Or just pray for rain.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Or get one of those self drips inside the garden garden.

[Jared]

Cook it. A self drip.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Like an herbal. Herbal IV before a garden.

[Ryan]

Exactly.

[Miles]

Yeah. If you need trenching work done. I bought a backhoe on Timu.

[Ryan]

Just bought it now.

[Jared]

Bought it off tamu.

[Miles]

I will. It's going to take me a few days to get it over though. I don't have a trailer, so I'm gonna have to go through town with it. And it. It goes 0.1 miles an hour.

[Ryan]

Let's go in the bike lane. Yeah.

[Miles]

And I think I'm five miles away from.

[Jared]

Yeah, I might have to park it on the sidewalk at night just so I go and get some sleep.

[Ryan]

Put some coins around us.

[Jared]

Yeah. Or I, I might have to. Might have to hire a guy to take over second shift. I'll take the two to two and then he'll take the next two to two.

[Ryan]

Well, you could probably drag it from a pickup. Just gotta drive a little slower. Like if you drove 10 miles per hour.

[Jared]

Yeah, I don't know, maybe you could throw it neutral and just. I mean, they got tracks. Yeah, yeah, so you just let the tracks fucking zip down the road at.

[Miles]

0.01 miles per hour. Take you 100 hours to go a mile. 500 hours divided by 24 would take me 21 days to get to your house. Take me 3 weeks to drive my TEMU backhoe over to your house. So you can trench that, that auto drip or whatever it's called.

[Jared]

Herbal iv.

[Miles]

Herbal iv?

[Jared]

Yeah, you called doordash and like you put your location because you like, you have to eat somehow. And it's just like. Well, right now I'm at the stoplight of 7th Avenue.

[Miles]

I'm gonna be here for another half hour.

[Jared]

Yeah, I'll probably be in the middle of the intersection about 45 minutes, so.

[Miles]

So if you just take a left hand turn, we probably should line up at the right time.

[Jared]

Yeah, you just, just drop, just drop it at my door. Yeah, I had time.

[Ryan]

I calculated the whole thing.

[Jared]

By the time you get here, I should be across the street. But if I'm not, you're like on.

[Miles]

Your phone, obviously, because you're just on this thing for 21 straight days. Cop pulls you over, gives you a ticket for, for not being hands free.

[Ryan]

Just by luck.

[Miles]

You're like, dude, I've already been out here for 11 days.

[Jared]

I got 10 to go.

[Ryan]

I haven't seen my kid.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ryan]

It'S like a little five foot stretch. You need to dig.

[Miles]

Literally you could dig like 40, 42 of them. By the time you drive this thing.

[Jared]

Over there, you could trench your whole yard good.

[Miles]

I mean, by hand, you could do five sprinkler systems in your whole yard.

[Jared]

Yeah, you're like, oh, I'm sick of this. You, you just park it in no parking zone, just hoping to get towed and to catch the tow truck driver and be like, hey, would you mind delivering this over to, over to 9th Street?

[Miles]

What would be smart is, is you, you order a roll off dumpster, we lift the thing into there and then be like, I need it over at this property. And then he just brings your. Your t. Mood back home.

[Jared]

Yeah, God. Apple Pay it just autocorrected my address to my old one. Wonder if you could move it across town.

[Ryan]

Damn phones.

[Jared]

No need to dump it. Yeah, nothing's in there.

[Miles]

Like, like you wouldn't be able to just borrow a trailer. Yeah, right, or rent a trailer for like, for like 60 bucks for one hour.

[Jared]

Or just, or just, or just rent a trencher for probably 3, 400 bucks, you save yourself 5,500.

[Miles]

I gotta use this teemu backhole that I bought.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah. Tiny cab too. The cabs are really small, tight. Yeah.

[Miles]

Hey, easier to heat and cool.

[Jared]

Yeah, true.

[Ryan]

Is it enclosed?

[Jared]

Oh, yeah.

[Ryan]

Oh, my.

[Jared]

On the, on the backhoes, they are. There's all kinds of options out there on tamu.

[Ryan]

Not a sponsor.

[Jared]

No.

[Miles]

Jared, what do you got for the next segment?

[Ryan]

What is better, a booth or a high top?

[Jared]

Okay, what are you.

[Miles]

Ryan.

[Jared]

Okay, so I saw this question, and as I got thinking about it, I'm neither.

[Miles]

What are you?

[Jared]

I'm. I'm neither a booth nor a high top guy. I am a low top chair type of guy. Number one. No one is stuck on the inside. So you are not, you're not having to take, you know, you're not having to take piss breaks when everyone else is having to take.

[Miles]

But between a. A high top and a booth, you're a high top guy.

[Jared]

I'm taking a high top.

[Miles]

And why?

[Jared]

Because I think it's purely for the piss factor. It's like, I'm not a window seat guy on. On a plane. I'm not a window seat guy on a plane. I'm an aisle guy. So if I get stuck on the window seat in a booth, I'm out.

[Miles]

Okay, so for.

[Jared]

I might just pull a chair up to the end of the booth.

[Miles]

So for the sheer ease of going to the bathroom, you're choosing high top.

[Jared]

Correct.

[Miles]

See, I. I go both ways. Everyone knows that about me.

[Ryan]

No, it's like you're either booth or a high top guy. I'm in the middle.

[Miles]

Yeah, Yeah. I like a high top booth.

[Jared]

Now that's not a bad idea.

[Miles]

They do have them places. I don't get the point of them.

[Ryan]

But your feet dangle like they just.

[Miles]

Bought too many high tops. They're like, now we gotta put the boots on stilts. No, I think a booth is better in a restaurant setting, and a high top is better for a bar setting.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So if I'm going to restaurant to eat dinner, give me a booth. Feels more private. Doesn't feel like the whole restaurant's listening to my conversation. Now the bathroom is. Is an issue, but it also kind of gives you something to do when the conversation winds down.

[Jared]

That's true.

[Miles]

You know, nothing's worse. You're like, ah. You know, but as soon as it's like, oh, you need to get out to go to the bathroom. Sounds good. And you pop out, you know, it just gives you.

[Ryan]

It's It's a power move too.

[Miles]

It is. It is a power move to make someone sit on the inside and you wait for them to go in.

[Jared]

Yeah. If you, if you walk up to the booth before they do and you step to the side so they can get. Yeah, that's a power move move.

[Miles]

I do that to Jake every time we go out to eat in a booth.

[Jared]

And he's not going to argue with you.

[Miles]

No. Once he put him in a headlock. Yeah. If it gets to that. But bar setting, bar that it gives you so much. Because at a bar what you want is options, you know, because if it's. You're stuck in a booth, that's kind of the seating arrangement that you're doing.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Where if it's a high top at a bar, you can walk around and mingle, go to the bathroom, come back from the bathroom, talk to the other side of the table. You can be, be mixing and matching more. You know, you can turn around, talk to your buddy that just walked in. A lot easier talking to someone while sitting in a booth while they're standing.

[Jared]

It's odd.

[Miles]

Is one of the most uncomfortable situations. Yeah. Because the whole time and then you're kind of doing the lean like this and then it's like, okay, well should I stand up? Because this is now weird.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Is this a power move that I'm not standing up. But I also don't want to sit and chit chat with you all day. But I also don't want to be rude food.

[Jared]

Well, it's also weird for them too, because they can't high top. They can just come up and like throw their forearms on the table.

[Miles]

That is like I would say of a high top, if you don't want to talk to someone and they come throw an elbow on the table, you're stuck there. You're stuck.

[Jared]

Yeah. If it, you know, if, say they do want to be there and you do want to chit chat with them, though, it's like they could sit there with their hands in their pants looking down at you in a booth, which I guess also is a power move kind of. So if you ever like, if you, if there's someone you don't like, try and catch them in a booth and then go talk to them because then you're in control.

[Miles]

That's true.

[Jared]

You know what I mean?

[Miles]

But see, so flops. So the, the thing that we found out is on the job site, we couldn't talk openly about what we were doing that evening because flops Would just show up. So, like, yeah, we're gonna. I think I'm going to this bar tonight. Whatever hour after you show up to the bar, either Flops was already there, or he would show up an hour after you're there. And he would just come to the end of the high top and just stand there with his hands in his pockets, and he wouldn't say a word.

[Ryan]

It's like, he could.

[Miles]

And so people will be like, who's that elderly lady standing at the end of your table? You're like, that's one. One, he's not that old. He just looks old. And two, he's. She's a guy.

[Jared]

So, like, let's just say.

[Miles]

But. But to be honest, I wouldn't put a bathroom for just come stand at the end of your booth either. He's just. He's a lurker, just creeping.

[Jared]

You got someone walking by. They're like, sir, can you tell me where the bathrooms are at? He's like, bathrooms?

[Miles]

I don't even work here.

[Jared]

It's like, oh, I Flops.

[Miles]

You know where the bathroom is? Bathrooms? Yeah, that's what I said. Oh, you said. Now are you gonna tell me where the bathrooms are at? Bathroom? He's like, jesus Christ, Flops. But in his defense, the. Him not saying anything, Once you get comfortable with the idea that he's just gonna stand there and not say anything, I mean, if you can get past that, then it's not bad because you don't have to, like, include him in conversations.

[Ryan]

You know, this is a large first hurdle.

[Miles]

Yeah, it's not. A lot of people can get over the fact that he's just gonna stand there and not saying. My favorite Flops era was when he was doing a soul patch. Oh, right here. And we're talking. For whatever reason, he shaved it, like, really narrow. So you know how, like, if I were to do a soul patch, it would kind of stretch the whole bottom of my lip and then go down into a triangle. Right, right. He would just. It would just be straight. It'd be like a landing strip on his lower lip. So it would just be like a narrow soul patch.

[Jared]

Kind of. Kind of be like a TJ Lavin soul patch from mtv. Like a backwards monster hat type of deal.

[Miles]

Yes, but. But it was only this. It would, like. It was just. It wouldn't go all the way down to his chin. It would just go. It would just settle on top of the top part of his chin.

[Jared]

Gotcha. Well, I think he. He was probably just banking on that sucker Growing. Growing quick. So then it could just, like, fall down the bottom.

[Miles]

Also, I've started now to just think about the idea of a soul patch and how insane it is that people will shave their whole face, except for just this part right here, to me, is crazy.

[Jared]

I think some guys do it to cover up if, if they're throwing in bottom deckers. Cover it up a little bit.

[Miles]

Either that or it just accentuates it.

[Jared]

That's true. That's true. Now, you said that you were mentioned the triangle on the soul patch. Is that normal to, to go.

[Miles]

You know what I'm talking about.

[Jared]

No, I know what you're talking like.

[Miles]

So whatever hair grows right here. You just. Yeah, like that.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Miles]

I'm thinking like, like that. That's a triangle.

[Jared]

Gotcha. I'm thinking the triangle goes all the way down to, to the bottom of your chin.

[Miles]

Floss is like that, but narrower and not as long.

[Jared]

That's insane. I think the, the one thing that I could grow that's half decent is a decent soul patch.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean, you almost got the flops.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

If I just.

[Miles]

And can you. You should do it.

[Jared]

I've done it before.

[Miles]

No, but just grow the flops.

[Jared]

We should do the Skinny boy. The Skinny boy.

[Ryan]

We should do, like, Soul Patch September or something.

[Miles]

Yeah. My wife may divorce me if I did that.

[Jared]

Long ways away.

[Ryan]

If somebody loses a bed, they have to get a soul patch or something.

[Jared]

Yeah. I kind of want to just do one. Just to do one, because I've never really been.

[Miles]

Or what we should do in September, on September 1, have Anne on the podcast and be like, ah, hold on, I gotta go to the bathroom. Then I go in and shave into a soul patch. And then we all just have to act like I didn't just shave a soul patch and just, Just see what happens.

[Jared]

That'd be good. I, I, I, I'm in for that.

[Miles]

My wife's never even seen me without facial hair, so that would be, it would be a doubly shocking.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Situation.

[Jared]

I, I think the least amount of facial hair I've seen you with is. I mean, you didn't have facial hair back in 20017.

[Miles]

It was just very short beard.

[Jared]

Okay. The, the UFC video that you did with Trevor Wallace, that was like, the least amount of facial hair, I think.

[Miles]

And I just had a big goatee.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Ryan]

That been a great video. To have a soul patch.

[Miles]

It would. Oh, God.

[Jared]

I know.

[Miles]

I don't know. Let's bring soul patches back.

[Jared]

Yeah. I, I'M not opposed to it. Not opposed to it at all.

[Miles]

I could grow a mean soul patch.

[Jared]

I'm pretty sure September's a long ways away, though. I don't know if I want to wait that long.

[Miles]

Is 2025 the year of the soul patch?

[Ryan]

The year of soul? Tyler will sure do it. For sure do it.

[Miles]

Yeah. Tyler will do anything.

[Jared]

Yeah. His ones stick out as much, though, because it's blonde.

[Ryan]

We'll have them diet. We'll put another bed on top of it or something.

[Jared]

True. Okay.

[Miles]

Question is, do I run it by and to just. You know, because it's like, this is a big decision. If it's gonna ruin my marriage, you know, I need to at least know that going into it, or do I just do it at some point?

[Jared]

So you. You would have to shave everything?

[Miles]

Yeah. Except for the soul patch. I know. I'm just.

[Jared]

I'm now just processing.

[Miles]

I think, you guys, that's a huge decision to see my upper lips. Lip. I remember when my dad shaved his whole goatee off one time. It was like, oh, I don't like looking. When was the last time you were clean shaving? Were you clean shaving at this company ever?

[Ryan]

I think it's just been, like, a really close shave, so probably.

[Jared]

Couple times, maybe.

[Ryan]

Yeah, once or twice.

[Jared]

Couple times.

[Ryan]

I remember.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

I just look like a baby.

[Jared]

Me too. Yeah, all the time.

[Ryan]

Yeah. I hate it. And then you see by, like, my double chins and stuff, and I'm like, I can't wait for, like, two weeks.

[Miles]

That'd be interesting to see how many chins I got these days. I still got at least one under there.

[Ryan]

Yeah, for sure. I want to keep one chin at least.

[Jared]

Yeah. Yeah. I tried to do the mustache thing again. I. I've. I've told you guys this before. Just. It's too wiry. Yeah. I look like Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite.

[Ryan]

Do you have dark hair on your mustache?

[Jared]

Oh, yeah. Like jet black.

[Ryan]

Okay. I've never seen it.

[Jared]

Yeah, it's. I. I don't keep it round often.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

But, yeah, we'll do no Shave November, too. We'll parlay that.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah, we'll go. We'll. Yeah, we'll just start. We'll go October 1st. We'll just let it all grow until the end of November.

[Jared]

You could do. You could do Fu Man February. Fu Man February would be a good look on you.

[Miles]

Is that just. Where it just goes all the way down like that?

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

You look like a divorced dad with a goatee.

[Jared]

Fu Manchu.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah. Fu man.

[Miles]

Like I'd rather do that than the.

[Jared]

Soul patch like Ben Stiller from. From Happy Gilmore. Dodgeball or dodgeball. Yeah.

[Miles]

Jared, are you a high top or a booth guy?

[Ryan]

Depends. If I'm eating food, booth. If I'm drinking, high top, same.

[Miles]

I don't think there's another answer.

[Jared]

If you had to pick though one for the rest of your life, what would it be?

[Ryan]

High top.

[Miles]

Yeah. High top just gives you more options.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Space. I need space.

[Jared]

Seems like with the high tops for me and I'm a high top guy. Over, over booth. If I had to choose the. The foot railing is never in the right spot.

[Miles]

Yeah. Why can't we figure that out?

[Jared]

There's either no foot railing. It's in a really bad spot. And if there is no foot railing, you just have to use your. Your chair.

[Miles]

Why don't you just do so like you've been on a charter bus before where there's a footrest that goes up and has different levels. Why don't they just do that at the bar? There's like three clicking points. And if you, if you push it all the way down, you can put it all the way up or you can go down till it clicks and then you push it down and go up until it clicks. Why don't they do that?

[Jared]

Did you say like a barbershop?

[Miles]

Well, barber chair. No. This is like on a charter bus. Charter.

[Jared]

Okay. Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

You know what I'm talking about?

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

A one way box.

[Miles]

It's like the gray little T thing that comes out.

[Jared]

Yep, yep.

[Miles]

And still though those. You could never get it in the right spot.

[Ryan]

No, it was clicking the right spot.

[Miles]

All the clicking spots were. Had to have been for like a five foot five human being.

[Jared]

Now on the opposite end of that.

[Miles]

That'd be funny if we found out the guy invented. It was like five, three. Yeah, he just. He just designed it for himself.

[Ryan]

Worked for me.

[Jared]

On the other end of the spectrum, it's with.

[Miles]

You're on the spectrum room.

[Jared]

We all are. I think a little bit. Yeah, I'm probably just on it a little bit more than you. But weird flex for booths. Why can't we have like. Booths are always so straight up and down and the pads always arc out. So it's just a kind of an uncomfortable sitting position for your back. Why can't we have them like planes to where you can recline or. Or it's like sleep. Sleep number, bed. Like you can adjust your number.

[Miles]

Could you imagine if we're eating dinner? Jared, you And I. And I was just like, like. So how about that Vikings game last night, huh? Yeah. I'll take another beer over here. And then I'm going to need a longer straw, though. And a bib and then a.

[Jared]

But one of your buddies walks in and. And. And now you're laying down while trying to talk to him standing up.

[Ryan]

The music's loud.

[Miles]

You're just like, so what's going on?

[Ryan]

And the person that's sitting behind Mouse is getting crushed.

[Jared]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, no, no, like the, The. The seat. The seat comes out. The seat comes out like an airplane. So, you know.

[Ryan]

It'S like an old.

[Jared]

You'd be comfy though. You'd be just relax, eating dinner.

[Miles]

It should be that like once. Once you get it. Once you. There's like a little like button that like, once you're done with your dinner, you recline. Yeah, that's one of my favorite things to do after dinner is just to recline.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

And you'd stay longer too.

[Miles]

Yeah, well, they don't want you to stay longer. I.

[Jared]

Well, I'd be more.

[Miles]

Unless you're buying.

[Jared]

I'd be more apt to order dessert if I was reclined.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Double edged sword.

[Jared]

So.

[Miles]

Should we take a break, Jared?

[Ryan]

Let's do it.

[Miles]

We got merchandise on the website. Oh, you betcha Dot com. Which one am I wearing?

[Jared]

Ditch chickens, khaki, black patch hat.

[Miles]

This is my favorite hat we got right now.

[Jared]

Solid hat.

[Miles]

It's best seller, bestseller for a reason. You know, it looks good, feels good, makes me feel good. Plus, Ryan, I see that you've been sending me doomy eyes all podcasts since I've been wearing this podcast. So guys, if you want to go to the bar and just ooze sex appeal, you got to go to oh, you bet you Dot com. Because everything on there is just. It's. We might as well just call it sex. Yeah, it should just be sex.com instead of. Oh, you bet you dot com. Like that handle, right? No, we tried. It's gone.

[Jared]

Life jacket not included.

[Miles]

Yeah. So guys, if you'd like to swimming at the bar, you got to go to. Oh, you bet you Dot com. We got the canvas. You roll up in a gray hoodie with one of our canvas vests on and a road hunt for ditch chickens hat. Make sure you bring a stick. You have to fend them all off.

[Ryan]

Basically. A life vest.

[Miles]

Yeah, our. Our vest. We should have a thing you pull and it turns into a life vest.

[Jared]

So can I just. Can I just throw one other thing in there. There we are. Sub 80. We are subbed. Sub 75 tongs.

[Miles]

What?

[Ryan]

Let's go.

[Miles]

That's it, guys. The final push. We didn't get. We almost got it done by 20. That was our. What was, what was it? Our old year resolution. Yeah, I'm pretty happy with that, guys.

[Ryan]

75, 150 clicks away.

[Jared]

Yeah, that's right.

[Miles]

And this is.

[Jared]

That's a good one, Jeff. It.

[Miles]

This is. This is. Let's take a moment to reflect. Six months ago we were sitting on 3,000 tongs. Well, hey, no hitter. It's not. The game's not over yet.

[Jared]

Job's not.

[Miles]

We'll talk about it once we sold.

[Jared]

Job finished. Job not finished.

[Miles]

Job's not finished. You know, eighth inning, got no hitter on her hands. Let's keep it rolling.

[Ryan]

We're not going to talk about the 75 tongs we have left.

[Jared]

No.

[Miles]

So our old year resolution was to get them all sold. We didn't do that. But our new year, new month resolution is to get all 74 of these babies slung by the end. I don't want to take this into February. I can't be sitting there on Valentine's Day with my lovely life thinking about.

[Ryan]

To candle at dinner.

[Miles]

Let's. Let's get these babies sold. We're almost the end.

[Jared]

I can't wait to get rid of those things. Packing though, I. I hate.

[Miles]

I mean, honestly, we've been selling so many. Should we order some more?

[Jared]

Maybe we'll do a pre order so that we can order exactly how many are actually ordered on the site.

[Miles]

Quite literally. Guys, we're not making any more.

[Jared]

No, no.

[Miles]

This is it. So if you're ever like, wow, God, why should I buy? We're not. They're not making it once in a lifetime.

[Jared]

They. You will not see these things again.

[Miles]

They may be like Beanie babies. Be worth something someday.

[Jared]

That's true.

[Ryan]

They're going through somewhere.

[Jared]

Yeah. You get on the website, you're only two clicks away from getting one of them sent to your house.

[Miles]

Two clicks away from you doing two clicks at your house.

[Jared]

Correct.

[Miles]

So guys. Ou bet you dot com. Check it out, guys. New Year, same old us. We got Patreon going on over at Patreon. How many episodes are we up to? Jerry, don't give me 110 plus give me this week.

[Ryan]

It's be 157 episodes.

[Miles]

100 if you like. You bet your radio. Go. First of all, get your head checked out, make sure you're okay. Secondly, there's 157 other episodes over on Patreon. Gotta check it out. There's the wives episode. There is. Help me out, Jared.

[Ryan]

What else?

[Miles]

Road trippers one and two.

[Ryan]

Yep. We got hookah episodes.

[Miles]

Hookah episodes, standing episode, edible roulette.

[Jared]

Roulette, which we got to bring back. And then I. My. Mine. My drink has to have the edible. Just because my buddies say it was awesome.

[Ryan]

You know, we have a standing episode, we have a roof episode, all sorts.

[Jared]

We dyed Tyler's hair black. Jet black.

[Miles]

I forgot about that. That might be worth it just to go check that out again.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

So funny.

[Miles]

Like I said, he'll do anything.

[Jared]

Yeah. Accidentally smeared some on his ears.

[Miles]

Yeah. Okay. Accidentally.

[Jared]

Oh, you guys wanted me to.

[Miles]

Ryan's like. So, guys, if you want to check out all the extra episodes, all of the shenanigans over at patreon, go to patreon.com, you bet you radio or go to the Patreon app. Look us up. Jared, this next segment spent a long time coming.

[Ryan]

Years in the making.

[Miles]

I feel like you've been pitching this segment for a long time, and you finally got me in a good enough mood to say, let's try it out.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

So, Jared, without further ado, what is this segment that you are so madly in love with?

[Ryan]

Guess the sound. Okay, so I'll go one by one, and you have to guess the sound.

[Jared]

So is. Is this a competition? Do we have to buzz in?

[Ryan]

Let's do that. Yeah, I like that nut button.

[Jared]

Okay. Okay, so we'll. Okay, we'll put a nut button right there.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Miles]

Should we maybe go like that?

[Jared]

Yeah, because this is. I think that. Yeah, this isn't even a test.

[Miles]

This is going somewhere.

[Jared]

Yes, it is. We should ratchet strap. We should throw a strap around this whole thing.

[Ryan]

But it would just say nut that put a red strap right over it.

[Miles]

Oh, it's.

[Jared]

Yeah, it's out now.

[Miles]

It's.

[Jared]

We can't. We can't trust it.

[Ryan]

Look at.

[Miles]

Oh, my God. What happened back here?

[Jared]

That's just how it always is.

[Miles]

We got some repairs to do around.

[Jared]

Yeah, we got some super.

[Miles]

I gotta pick up some wood glue. Absolute rookie using super glue on a piece of wood. Anyways, best sounds. So it's. It's nothing else other than guess the sound. That's it. It's just. We're gonna listen to it and it.

[Jared]

Could be people place thing.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

CBA could be anything.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Ryan]

It could be anything.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Miles]

CBA could be anyone.

[Ryan]

And bonus points if you get it, like, specifically right.

[Miles]

Too okay, so more specific will be better.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Okay. Okay.

[Jared]

And if you buzz in and don't get it right, then the other person can steal for double. Because then we could just be hammering the nut button and then, yeah, we.

[Miles]

Got some sort of steel for double. I like that.

[Jared]

Steal for double.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Miles]

Yeah. If you click into these, will it show us what it is?

[Ryan]

No.

[Miles]

Okay. I just said that. Be.

[Ryan]

That be a blank screen.

[Miles]

But I mean the title of it.

[Jared]

No, it just says sound one, sound two, sound three.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I checked it. All the sounds are.

[Miles]

All right, He's. He's.

[Jared]

He's scheming this.

[Miles]

Sorry. This is your game.

[Ryan]

I hope I didn't screw.

[Miles]

You have to. You can't be touching the table for the nut button. You have to be touching this.

[Ryan]

Touch yourself.

[Miles]

Don't touch yourself. Touch the chair.

[Jared]

What if I can. I like the Ola, like flag football or playing playground football in elementary school. And you, I told you guys about, like, locking arms so you get. You could get into the other team's hobbies model if as long as you had one guy behind line of scrimmage, you were good. So I'll link. I'll link hands.

[Ryan]

All right.

[Miles]

All right, here we go.

[Ryan]

Here's version.

[Miles]

Ryan. Got it.

[Jared]

That is Microsoft shutting down.

[Miles]

Can I.

[Ryan]

Go ahead, Miles.

[Miles]

Is that Microsoft Windows xp?

[Ryan]

Yes. You guys are both right.

[Miles]

So what?

[Ryan]

It's signing out of Windows XP is the correct answer.

[Jared]

Totally means shutting down.

[Ryan]

Signing out.

[Jared]

Well, then where do you go when you sign out?

[Miles]

But he didn't say xp, right?

[Ryan]

You said.

[Jared]

Yeah, because he said Windows xp. I said Windows shutting down.

[Ryan]

It wasn't shutting down, though technically it could.

[Miles]

But technically, that also just brought me back.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it did play one more time.

[Miles]

Windows XP shutting down. Logging out.

[Jared]

Windows XP logging out. Final answer.

[Ryan]

That's a tough one.

[Miles]

Hey, don't tell us what it is. It just say yes or no, and then we just have to keep guessing until we get it.

[Jared]

Okay. Yeah, I like that. I like that. So.

[Miles]

So that was a draw.

[Jared]

Draw.

[Ryan]

Yeah, they got struck. I'll go 1 1.

[Miles]

Okay, so it's 1 1.

[Jared]

That's what I mean. That's one of the most even keel draws you can get.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that was dead even. I'm sure people disagree with me. All right, here's the next one.

[Miles]

Oh, the Jeopardy. Buzz in.

[Jared]

No, the Family Feud buzz in.

[Ryan]

Yes.

[Miles]

Damn it. I watch a lot of Family Feud, too.

[Jared]

Big Feud guy.

[Miles]

I'm going to be honest. I. I hit it way too fast.

[Jared]

I know, I know.

[Miles]

Wasn't even finished with the sound and nut came on.

[Jared]

So steel for I stole for double.

[Ryan]

2 1. I don't know if that's a steal. Are we doing stealing three to one.

[Jared]

Now we'll go two one.

[Miles]

No, three to one. We. We agreed it was steal for double.

[Ryan]

All right, three for one.

[Miles]

But new rule. If you steal and you get it wrong, you lose two.

[Ryan]

Two.

[Miles]

You lose one, you lose a point. Okay, so you could gain two points, but you also could lose a point on a steel.

[Jared]

Okay, I like.

[Miles]

I don't know why we implemented.

[Jared]

And you can choose.

[Miles]

I need to give myself a chance. But after the first steal, it's then. So okay, yeah, I click it, I can get one point. If I get it wrong, he can nut then he can get two points or a minus one one. But then after that we just go back and forth and only one point is up. And if he gets it right, he just. It's a wash.

[Jared]

Okay, so I steal it wrong. I'm minus one. But then if I get it right after you get it wrong.

[Miles]

But then there's no minus points after that. Right?

[Jared]

I get my point back.

[Miles]

You just go back to zero. Okay.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Ryan]

You guys keep track.

[Jared]

Three, one, one.

[Ryan]

Okay, you guys ready?

[Miles]

Is that the pornhub intro? Yes, I was.

[Jared]

That must be circa like 2009.

[Miles]

Don't act like you didn't know it off the note.

[Jared]

I don't, I don't remember that. That, that, that like bass note in the middle.

[Miles]

Good cover.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Miles]

Okay. Three to two.

[Jared]

Three, two.

[Ryan]

I forget which this one is.

[Miles]

Check it out.

[Ryan]

Gas prices blowing up sky high.

[Jared]

Ditch my used sub Compact for a two wheeled ride.

[Miles]

Free credit report.com commercial.

[Ryan]

Yes. I, I, that was a big G. That was good.

[Miles]

I, that was tied up, baby.

[Jared]

That was not.

[Miles]

Not the banger though. No, that was not the. That was not the more popular free. That one was not a banger. The other free credit report.com commercial was way better.

[Ryan]

I tried to make a little tougher on that one.

[Jared]

I did not have that one.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So as soon as I heard use sub sub compact car or something, I knew it was that. This is not a free credit report dot com, baby. That was the one. One.

[Ryan]

Yep. All right, here's the next one.

[Miles]

I don't.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I forget all these now.

[Jared]

Oh, wow.

[Ryan]

One more time.

[Jared]

Oh, wow.

[Miles]

Feel like he should know this.

[Ryan]

One more time.

[Jared]

Oh, wow. I have no idea.

[Miles]

I have no.

[Jared]

It's from a video game, I think. Oh, wow.

[Ryan]

Whose voice is that? I'll tell you one More time.

[Jared]

Oh, wow. Is it from the latte video?

[Ryan]

Incorrect.

[Miles]

I would not like to steal.

[Ryan]

Should I say it, Chris Rocket slapped by Will Smith.

[Miles]

Wait, again. I thought the reason why I said he should know it. It sounded like a UFC punch of some sort or like a leg kick kick. Did that not sound like a leg kick?

[Jared]

No, it did. It did. Oh, wow.

[Miles]

I thought it was a woman.

[Jared]

See, I was thinking it was.

[Miles]

I thought it was a woman. I was maybe gonna guess Pat Summit.

[Jared]

Legend.

[Miles]

I thought it was maybe, like, the first woman dunking. It was Pat Summit.

[Jared]

Lisa. Leslie.

[Ryan]

Leslie. Oh, wow.

[Jared]

It sounded like a cornhole bag hitting a board, and I just.

[Miles]

Oh, wow. That was tough.

[Jared]

Oh, wow.

[Miles]

It's. Yeah, it's the crowd that throws me off, because in my head, during that moment, you could hear a pin drop.

[Jared]

Yeah. God, that was a tough one.

[Ryan]

So if I played a pin drop, you'd be like Chris Rockins.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Okay. Three, two.

[Miles]

No, three, three.

[Jared]

Did you get that?

[Ryan]

I guess that was a wash, that one. So. Yeah, it's.

[Miles]

I. I purposely did steal because I didn't want to get a minus one.

[Jared]

You only get minus one if you steal and get it wrong.

[Miles]

I know. I didn't want to get it wrong.

[Jared]

No, so you didn't. You didn't. No one got minus one there.

[Miles]

I know. So it's three. Three. Remember, I got the free credit report dot com. And I was like, tied up, baby.

[Jared]

So that was three. Two. No, no, because it was one to one.

[Miles]

Because then I got the one before that. We're on number. We're on number six.

[Jared]

What was the one before?

[Miles]

So we've had five.

[Jared]

What was it?

[Miles]

So you got two points. One. Didn't get any.

[Ryan]

For your credit report. Yeah.

[Jared]

Play the ones before that. Which ones played number four? Oh, you got the hub. You got hub.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah. Easy.

[Jared]

Yep. Three, three.

[Ryan]

Just play that song.

[Miles]

I only know that because it was a Tik Tok trend.

[Ryan]

I never done it so fast. All right, here's the next one.

[Miles]

More time. All right. Rewinding or fast forwarding? A vh. Vhs.

[Ryan]

Yes. Yeah.

[Miles]

Let's go.

[Jared]

Dude, you didn't say that very confidently.

[Miles]

Or cassette tape.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it's essentially a VCR in a. Or a VHS and a vcr. I can't tell if it's rewind or fast forwarding, but Play it again.

[Miles]

You're holding it. Kids today would not know what it. They'd be like, that's a Roomba. What a bunch of idiots. 4, 3. What a comeback for the comeback Kid, all I need is a chip and a chair at the table. Let's go, no hitter. Don't talk about it.

[Ryan]

All right, here's the next one.

[Miles]

I know this.

[Jared]

So do I. Play it again.

[Miles]

I know this. One more time.

[Ryan]

It's good. Radio.

[Miles]

Is that part of the intro of the Disney Channel? Like commercials.

[Ryan]

Incorrect. Right? You got this. I got this. Got 15 seconds.

[Jared]

Keep playing it over and over.

[Ryan]

One more time.

[Jared]

Yeah, one more.

[Ryan]

10 seconds.

[Jared]

I choose not to steal.

[Miles]

Smart man.

[Ryan]

It's from the space cadet pinball game on.

[Miles]

Oh. Oh, that's a good one. Do you know what I'm talking about? I feel like that was part of the sound of the Disney Channel.

[Jared]

Play it one more time.

[Ryan]

I thought for sure you get that.

[Miles]

Is this when you do it? I thing it's so.

[Ryan]

It's like if it goes to the little God.

[Jared]

Now I play now I know too. I should have known that. I'm all right.

[Miles]

I can't lose the game now unless I get it wrong.

[Jared]

Can't go into sudden death, though. You got a sudden death one?

[Ryan]

I don't. I should have picked it. Odd number.

[Jared]

You got to foresee these things, Jared.

[Ryan]

My bad. All right, here's last song. We have talked about this multiple times on the podcast.

[Miles]

I think I know. But if I go and get it wrong and then he gets it right for two points, I lose. One more time.

[Ryan]

You guys both choose not to answer.

[Miles]

Play it again. I don't. I actually don't know. There's like, four things that are popping into my head. Have we talked about this or do we talk about a thing it's associated with?

[Ryan]

I'd say both.

[Miles]

God damn it. I don't know. I. I don't. I. I declined to answer.

[Ryan]

Pocket vetoes.

[Jared]

One more time.

[Ryan]

One more time. Five seconds or Ryan might as well take a shot.

[Jared]

I don't know. Velcro ripping off.

[Ryan]

Incorrect. That is a one of those basketball sticky bats that you peel off.

[Jared]

Oh, really?

[Miles]

At first I thought it was the beginning sound of the original Xbox starting up. And then I thought maybe it was a Mountain Dew Livewire commercial. Yeah. And then I was like, is that an energy sword from Halo 2?

[Ryan]

Too much nostalgia.

[Jared]

Play it one more time.

[Miles]

You hear the squeaking at the end.

[Jared]

I needed to hear some. Some more shoes squeaking in order to have a.

[Miles]

All right.

[Ryan]

Too obvious, though.

[Miles]

Sound game winner. Let's freaking go, dude. No hitter. Now we could talk about it. Struck you out, Ryan. I like that game, actually. I was a hater to begin with. I think we should play that game a lot more.

[Jared]

I think we need to draw the sounds out a little bit longer.

[Miles]

No, no, no, no, no. You can't. Then you just get it. It just like. It's just like. It's like it just the opening of a bo. It just plays a movie and Ryan just has to guess what movie it is.

[Ryan]

I was looking for like a Silverado door chime, but he could clearly hear him starting the vehicle. Like that would. That would work.

[Miles]

God.

[Jared]

I mean, they're also obvious once you tell us, you know, like the.

[Miles]

Yeah, that one was not obvious. What was the other one? The.

[Ryan]

Oh, the boomerang.

[Miles]

Yeah. What was that again?

[Ryan]

Space Cadet pinball machine. From like.

[Miles]

Oh, God. Yeah. See, I always play that without the volume on because I thought the noises were annoying after a while.

[Ryan]

Kind of scary.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Them things go for big money these days. Is Space Cadet.

[Miles]

No, that isn't. Isn't this the one on the computer?

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jared]

Oh, I think it's on the actual pinball machine too.

[Miles]

Really?

[Ryan]

Yeah, I don't know. I just remember it on the computer.

[Jared]

Type in Space Cadet pinball machine.

[Ryan]

Maybe later they made one are worth big money. Manchu pinball. I'm sure they do make one.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

See where it's right there.

[Jared]

Right there.

[Miles]

That'S in VR right now.

[Ryan]

I don't see a real one. They probably make one, but.

[Miles]

Yeah, someone probably made an aftermarket one.

[Jared]

They definitely do. Yeah, they for sure do.

[Miles]

I never even thought about that. It's Space cadet. Which is kind of funny.

[Jared]

No.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I would have accepted like windows old pinball game or something.

[Miles]

Oh, well, that was fun.

[Jared]

I enjoyed that.

[Miles]

Seven out of. Well, six out of eight.

[Ryan]

Not bad.

[Jared]

I think this is. This is a more of a us game. I don't think we can. I think Tyler. I. I don't think we involve him.

[Miles]

No, I think we do bring on the more competition. And if you come at the king, you best not miss, you know.

[Ryan]

Ah. Play like lightsaber.

[Miles]

You got any fun facts for us today, J?

[Ryan]

I do. The current holder. Current holder of the organization. Sorry, excuse me. Oldest person ever is a French. Oldest person ever is a French woman called Jean Louis Calment who died in 1997 aged 122 years old and 164.

[Miles]

Days oldest woman ever.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

122 years old.

[Jared]

Yeah. What's your secret to living so long? Oh, God. Big Mac and a one beer every day.

[Miles]

I had a glass of wine every day at 5.

[Ryan]

Harry Curry.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Would you eat the moon if it was made of cheese. I have an ice cold Budweiser every night after work. That is a fun fact. She died in 1997.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

She married. She saw. She's older than my pocket watch.

[Ryan]

That's fucking old dinosaur.

[Jared]

Yeah. Jesus Cramity.

[Ryan]

The word robot was introduced in 1920 in a play by Carol Capek called R U R or Rossum's Universal Robots. Robot comes from Czech word robota meaning forced labor or drudgery. In the play, human like mechanical creatures produced in Ross's factory are docile slaves moves.

[Miles]

So it came from the Dutch, what was it?

[Ryan]

Check.

[Miles]

It's from the chest.

[Jared]

Roboto.

[Ryan]

Roboto.

[Jared]

Yeah. Mr. Roboto. I think medulla amlagata. I think that where that's where that song came from. Was the Dutch or the Czech.

[Ryan]

No, the sticks.

[Jared]

Or the sticks. I think they were from the Czech though.

[Ryan]

The sticks. I think they're American.

[Miles]

No.

[Jared]

Ah.

[Ryan]

Are you talking about the song, Mr. Abato? Yeah, yeah, the sticks.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Miles]

Not check.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Huh. That's kind of a fun, fun one. I'm going to tell my kid that tonight.

[Miles]

What is. What does a guy from the Czech Republic say to an Australian when the Australian ask him where he's from?

[Ryan]

Check. The shrimp on the Bobby.

[Miles]

Checkmate. That's check and mate. That's a good episode, don't you guys think? All right, well, another huge win for me today. I'm gonna sleep good tonight.

[Jared]

I'm telling An. You got the P hub one, right?

[Miles]

No, I disclaimered. I only know it because of the. I never listen to that on sound. Only know it because of the tick tock trend and because it was one of my buddies in. In when I was working concrete's ringtone.

[Jared]

I wish you would have said ring back to me.

[Miles]

That's actually pretty smart because then it. Because then if you are watching, you know, stuff at lunch, people think you're just getting phone calls.

[Jared]

Yeah, Group message.

[Miles]

He's getting a phone call every 15 seconds.

[Jared]

Group messages have been blowing my phone up.

[Ryan]

That'd be a funny prank on your dad. Just changes like alert to that sound because he probably won't react to it.

[Miles]

Correct. I don't think he would get it.

[Jared]

No, Everyone around him would.

[Ryan]

Exactly.

[Miles]

Yeah. That age group was all analog, you know, I was all Playboy. Just. Just putting seam into newspaper season semen to a magazine paper.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah. There's a shelf life to those. Unlike today, the digital world, those pages are stuck together. Yeah.

[Miles]

Well, let's turn up another sticky page on this podcast, guys. Guys, thanks for tuning into another episode. We may your sounds be good and may your. All your apps have a raft at the end of the year. Cheers, Ryan. Oh, you betcha. Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Having a baby is the weirdest thing ever.

[Jared]

It is very strange.

[Miles]

It's just weird that, like. It's weird that that exists. I don't know. It's just. It's just the whole thing is weird.

[Jared]

No, I'm. I'm with you. It. It's very strange. Like, when you get down to the brass tax, it's like, whoa.

[Miles]

Like, it's. It's sweet. And like, I probably. We should have probably, like, taken some classes so I'd have known what was gonna happen. But the fact that you can just fly blind mind into that situation and that's just how you do it is crazy.

[Jared]

Pride. It's prime. I think it's primal.

[Ryan]

It's one of the oldest things humans can do.

[Miles]

It's older than my pocket watch.

[Jared]

Yeah. Way older. Regardless of what you believe, that's key.

[Miles]

It just also blows my mind that it's just such an inexact science. The way that they know if you're ready to push or not is they just jam their fingers up there and feel around. Yeah, yeah. That you seem about the right dilation. So let's start pushing a turkey.

[Jared]

And, like, how do they.

[Miles]

It's like, why do you think you could, like, just, like, ultrasound or something and be like, go time. Right?

[Jared]

Like, how can they. Just, like a finger test. I understand you can measure your. Like you measure your fingers and understand how dilated somebody is if you got two, three, four fingers. But, like, that's just like. It's just a. It's kind of just a guess. There's no measurement tool besides fingers.

[Miles]

Correct. That's what I mean. They're like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jared]

It's like you could have, like, had a bunch of salt that morning and, like, your fingers could be swollen, you know?

[Ryan]

It's about two fingers, big.

[D]

Red basket Empty souls they wonder Ryan's digging trenches without honor Sabo tearing ground the noise of scores past Summer watches crowd implores salt patch September stairs in mirrors Robot eyes Gears grind no one hears mutter moans his cries ignored Chris Rock reeling slapped aboard Windows crash the blue screen flashes Fox just standing Words in ashes silence echo fills the void Punk rock spirit never employed Crowd gathered round they watch in pain Ryan sweat it falls like rain passed off Come and shakes her head in shame those empty words no one to blame.

[Miles]

Look out Crowd.

[D]

Gathered around they watch in pain Riot sweat it falls like rain that summit shakes her head in shame those empty words no one to blame Soul patch Arcy in a daze Robot I lost in digital maze Mona moans the crowd of haze Chris Rock Rock stumbles through the clay windows Crash the blue screen flashes Flocks are standing Working ashes silence echo fills the void Punk rock spirit never employed.

[Jared]

Quade.

[Miles]

Quake.

[Ryan]

What's the best alcoholic beverage to have on a plane? And what movie are you watching with it?

[Jared]

It's a good question.

[Miles]

I feel like I always see someone watching, like, the movie Taken on the Airplane, Something with Liam Neeson. I feel like people are always watching those movies on planes. It's weak. It's like. And you can't watch any plane movies? No. That's just bad news.

[Jared]

God, no. Snakes.

[Ryan]

Movies suck.

[Jared]

You can't watch Carry On. You. I don't know if you guys have seen that Netflix, but you can watch Conair, though.

[Ryan]

Hell, yeah.

[E]

I'd accept Conair on a plane.

[Miles]

Or catch me if you can, maybe.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I just watched that last week.

[E]

Good movie.

[Miles]

You don't want to watch Cast Away?

[E]

No, you.

[Miles]

You guys don't want to watch Snakes on a Plane.

[Jared]

You guys remember that movie? I think Snoop Dogg was in it. This was back in, like, 2000.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Soul plane. You can watch Soul Plane.

[Ryan]

That's a good one.

[E]

Soul Plane passes.

[Jared]

Yep.

[E]

I meant just watching drunk on a plane music video on repeat.

[Miles]

Could be that buying Dr. For everybody but the pilot. It's. I like how he had to, like, yeah. Cover not drinking and driving the plane.

[E]

In the music video, the pilot comes out a little bit.

[Miles]

He's like, hey, well, there's two pilots. Tyler, so we're good.

[Jared]

Den's out. Washington. He's for sure drinking on the plane.

[Miles]

I like. I just. I like any whiskey of any sort on a plane.

[E]

There's not, like, a ton of options. At least I haven't been on, like, a fancy enough flight to get an option more than, like, vodka, whiskey, or rum.

[Miles]

Yeah, I don't. I don't ever do a beer on a plane.

[E]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I don't know why. I just don't.

[E]

That feels kind of wrong.

[Miles]

Well, because I feel like when you drink a beer, you're like, you want 2, 3, 4, 6, 12, 13. To have them bring you 13 beers is insane. So you got to do something a little more potent.

[E]

Yeah. They're gonna charge you $15 for your one beer, correct.

[Jared]

Not if you're first class. Like, I normally fly.

[E]

I think last time youth flew first class. I got free drinks backed by the. And you did.

[Jared]

Yeah. And I got cut off after two whiskeys.

[Ryan]

Yeah, well, it's because you're yelling at the flight attendant.

[Jared]

I. I was. I. There was not a single calling her toots. I didn't raise my voice a single.

[Miles]

Because you went like this to her stewardess.

[E]

Hey, toots, Another one.

[Jared]

Then Miles, Brother sitting next to me hammering. Just Cokes and he gets cut off.

[Miles]

I mean, they needed to save something for the rest of the people. That's true, but also, what is my brother doing in first class?

[Jared]

It was on the way to your bachelor party.

[Miles]

I know. What is he doing?

[Jared]

90 upgrade. I don't know that kid.

[Miles]

So I just do a whiskey with, like, a Liam Neeson movie.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Something casual.

[Miles]

Don't. Nothing with sex scenes, it gets weird. Yeah. Is that the worst? You're watching something, you forget there's a sex scene.

[Jared]

You're like, oh, you just throw your hat over top of the screen.

[E]

No, the last time we flew, I. I downloaded the Witch picture on the iPad, the Netflix show. And by episode four, there's just an intense sex scene. I'm like, oh, my God. I'm like. I had to, like, fast forward through it.

[Miles]

You just turn your brightness all the way down. That's what I usually do.

[E]

Well, it's like the window seat. I did one of those, like, kind of scooch my back, and I'm sitting like this, so the screen's facing the window.

[Jared]

Yeah. Hand on your pants. Yeah.

[E]

Cranking a little bit, like, hey, tuts, you got any more?

[Jared]

See, I don't care if there's a sex scene. If it's. If it's a movie I'm watching on the plane's tv, but if there's a sex scene on my own phone that from something I downloaded, then that phone goes face up and my head goes down onto the tray in front of me.

[Ryan]

Gross.

[Miles]

So he kind of does. He kind of does the hunched over position, correct?

[Jared]

Yeah. Yeah. So.

[Miles]

Isn'T that on due date as well? He gets in trouble for masturbating on his airplane.

[E]

I don't remember that much.

[Jared]

I have no idea.

[Miles]

What are you gonna say, Jared?

[Ryan]

Iced mount her? If you could hit any par three in the world, you have water, but no food. Are you gonna hit a hole in one first or are you gonna starve first?

[Miles]

You have. You have water but no food, Correct. Oh, you have to hit a hole in one on a par three.

[Ryan]

Any par three want.

[Miles]

Well, that. I'm just. I'm Going over to Castleton, North Dakota, going to the Cottonwood Golf Course. Hole number two. It's like what, like a 90 yard par three? Yeah.

[E]

They didn't specify what TE's either. We could play juniors.

[Miles]

And the reason why I'm picking that is my grandpa hit two hole in ones on that hole. Hell yeah. Yeah. So I, I know, I know someone can do it.

[Jared]

Well, I, I would think, think. I mean, if you have a bucket of balls right there, I, I would think after 24 hours you could get a hole in one even. 48 hours. Yeah. I mean, you're just on a two day fast at that point.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Oh, you don't get any food.

[E]

I think you choose food or water, right?

[Ryan]

No, I think it's just water.

[Miles]

I mean it, it could be disastrous though, because yes, sheer numbers make sense. But, but I mean, you could just be that unlucky that it could take you 10,000 shots to get it in that hole.

[E]

The nice thing about that hole too is you could skull one on accident and it still has a shot to get to the green. Like you could skull one and it doesn't leave the ground and it could still roll all the way to the green.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[E]

So I like that choice for the hole.

[Miles]

Yeah. It's the spot. That's what I would do.

[Jared]

What was the question? Like, like how long would it take or what? Could you do it?

[Ryan]

Could you hit a hole before you starve to death?

[Jared]

Oh, absolutely.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

100%. You can go 10 days without water, without food. Food without food.

[Miles]

You can go 10 days without water.

[Jared]

No.

[Ryan]

Yeah. 75 hard.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Why don't you do that for day 76? I'll be able to.

[Miles]

Why don't you do 10 extremely hard and just do no water for 10 days?

[Jared]

I think I, I think 10 extremely hard would be easier than 75 hard, to be honest.

[Miles]

No.

[Jared]

Oh, yeah. No, it's so much.

[Miles]

10 days without any water or liquids, you would die.

[Jared]

I mean, can you eat food?

[Ryan]

Yeah, but you would die though.

[Jared]

There's water.

[E]

That's got to be really dry ass. Food. No water.

[Miles]

Yeah, we're, we're doing, we're doing bread and that's it. Ryan, this is 10 extremely hard is, is.

[Jared]

Yeah, I'm out. I'm out on that. If it was four or five, I think I could do it.

[E]

I think that is the human limit. It's like five days.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Three to five, I think.

[E]

Yeah.

[Jared]

I mean, I just start eating snow too and not tell you guys, I didn't drink it. I ate it.

[Miles]

Guys, if you want more, you bet your radio. You got to check out our Patreon. You got to go to patreon.com you bets radio or look us up on the app and we have have hundreds of hours of other episodes on there that you can't get unless you're signed up. So you got to check us out on patreon. You bet your radio, baby.