The #1 Thing Midwesterners Love #327

Summary

You Betcha Radio – Episode: The #1 Thing Midwesterners Love #327 Release Date: May 21, 2025
Host: You Betcha (Myles), with Ryan on paternity leave, joined by Tyler and Jared

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1. Luke’s Retirement from the Outdoor Boys Channel

[00:47 – 04:44]

The episode opens with a significant announcement: Luke from the Outdoor Boys Channel has officially retired. The hosts—Myles, Tyler, and Jared—reflect on Luke’s decision, examining the signs that led up to his retirement and its implications for the Midwestern content creation community.

Myles expresses his anticipation of Luke’s retirement, noting, "I knew this was gonna happen when he... just had, like, six things go wrong." The discussion delves into Luke's final video where he depicted his struggles with equipment failures and physical pain, indicating his burnout.

Tyler adds humor by suggesting Luke could rebrand as the "Indoor Boys," imagining him transitioning to more domestic content like cooking: "Do a cooking channel... Complete rebrand."

The trio empathizes with Luke’s decision, recognizing the challenges of maintaining a content schedule while managing personal responsibilities, especially with family life taking precedence. They speculate on Luke’s potential return, emphasizing that his retirement may be temporary: "I think he'll be back in a few years."

Notable Quote:

• Jared [02:11]: "It's the beginning of the end because there's been times when we've been doing content where I've had that look in my eye of like, man, this is... I'm done."

2. The Midwest Obsession with Home Storage

[17:00 – 23:49]

Shifting gears, the hosts explore a quintessential Midwestern obsession: ample home storage. They share anecdotes about their own homes and interactions with Ryan’s new house, highlighting a cultural pride in having expansive storage spaces.

Tyler remarks, "We're all Midwesterners, are all pseudo hoarders," explaining how storage solutions are both a point of pride and a common topic of conversation. The discussion covers various storage-related topics, such as organizing Christmas decorations and the endless cycle of garage sales: "Go to a garage sale, acquire crap, store crap, sell crap, acquire crap."

They humorously touch upon multi-generational influences, mentioning how grandparents often pass down items, contributing to the accumulation of belongings. The conversation underscores how storage is not just practical but deeply ingrained in Midwestern identity.

Notable Quotes:

• Miles [19:30]: "I could show you that room I put all my animals in. I think I decorated it super well."
• Tyler [20:14]: "It's a badge of honor because we're all Midwesterners, are all pseudo hoarders, and we all accept that."

3. Miles’ HVAC Troubles and Lessons Learned

[33:40 – 44:28]

Myles shares a personal story about his struggles with his HVAC system, humorously dubbed "H Vac blues." After experiencing a malfunction during a heatwave, he sought the expertise of his trusted HVAC professional, Jim. The issue was traced back to a neglected air filter, leading to significant system icing despite regular upkeep.

Myles laments, "I just can't believe it'd be like your car will explode if you don't make sure that the windshield wiper fluid is full," drawing parallels between the neglect of HVAC maintenance and unexpected catastrophic consequences.

The conversation evolves into a broader critique of HVAC systems' dependency on air filters, advocating for more user-friendly designs. Tyler and Jared contribute by sharing their own experiences and frustrations, emphasizing the overlooked importance of regular maintenance.

Notable Quotes:

• Myles [35:43]: "They make air filters seem like they are just this thing to clean your air... They don't tell you that the entire system is dependent on these flimsy cardboard filters."
• Tyler [42:10]: "Can you at least agree that they don't put enough emphasis on how much the air filter matters?"

4. Miles’ Commencement Speech and Comedy Challenges

[60:00 – 73:22]

A significant portion of the episode revolves around Miles recounting his experience delivering a commencement speech. He discusses the preparation, the jokes he incorporated, and the mixed reactions he received from the audience.

Myles shares, "I was really worried about being a guy who goes on for too long," highlighting his anxiety about audience engagement. Despite fears, he felt the speech went well, with most jokes landing successfully. However, Tyler points out that one of Miles’ favorite jokes didn't resonate with the crowd: “The whole thing... Like you said that no one ever remembers the commencement speech, so you can give it every year.”

They humorously contemplate the idea of Miles becoming a regular commencement speaker, noting the possibility of repeated invitations due to the memorable yet perhaps not entirely effective nature of his speech.

Notable Quotes:

• Tyler [61:14]: "I thought you did pretty well. I watched the first one because you did two that day, right?"
• Myles [63:45]: "I just want everyone to know, if you want me to do a commencement speech, you're getting the exact... I'm not writing another one."

5. Listener Engagement: Prize Picks and Slit Picks

[12:00 – 16:11]

The hosts engage with their audience through a segment dedicated to Prize Picks, a fantasy sports platform. They discuss listener submissions, share winning lineups, and encourage audience participation.

Jared announces a listener named Gavin Spiral who won $35 with a lineup featuring Shane Smith, Aaron Jones, and Kristaps Porzingis: "Listener Gavin Spiral won 35 bucks. He had Shane Smith, Aaron Jones judge, and Christophis Porzingis three-man lineup."

The hosts exchange playful banter about their own picks, emphasizing the fun and community aspect of the segment. This interaction underscores the podcast’s commitment to involving listeners and fostering a sense of camaraderie.

Notable Quotes:

• Jared [12:40]: "Listener Gavin Spiral won 35 bucks. He had Shane Smith, Aaron Jones judge, and Christophis Porzingis three-man lineup."
• Tyler [14:00]: "He can do it. He did it the last three games."

6. Light-Hearted Banter and Everyday Life Stories

[04:46 – 73:22]

Throughout the episode, the hosts engage in light-hearted discussions about everyday challenges, parenting, home maintenance, and nostalgic references. They share humorous stories about dealing with young children, handling power outages, and reminiscing about old movies like "Three Ninjas."

Tyler recounts an incident involving a power outage and a mini fire: "Someone doing a controlled burn of the lake bed... and then on our way back, there's fire trucks, electrical crews, all sorts of shit parked at this fire." This story leads to a humorous comparison with their HVAC issues, blending real-life troubles with comedic relief.

The group's camaraderie shines as they joke about forgotten tasks, accidental household mishaps, and shared frustrations, making the conversation relatable and entertaining for listeners.

Notable Quotes:

• Tyler [49:18]: "It was the whole thing. Like, you said that no one ever remembers the commencement speech, so you can give it every year."
• Miles [65:27]: "The letters on the road where it says stop ahead. Is it supposed to read ahead stop, or stop ahead? First, the stop is on the bottom."

7. Closing Thoughts and Future Directions

[85:00 – End]

As the episode wraps up, the hosts continue their playful banter and discuss future plans, including humorous notions of name changes and ongoing maintenance challenges. They reflect on the importance of community and shared experiences, reinforcing their bond as a Midwestern trio navigating life’s ups and downs together.

They also touch upon listener contributions and encourage further engagement through Patreon, ensuring the ongoing growth and support of their podcast community.

Notable Quotes:

• Miles [85:00]: "You guys can feed your families. And I forgot the air filter slipped my mind amidst that pressure."
• Tyler [86:56]: "We have to start selling toothpicks, guys, if..."

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Key Takeaways

• Luke’s Retirement: Highlights the pressures of content creation and the importance of personal well-being.
• Midwestern Storage Obsession: Reflects cultural pride and the practical aspects of home organization.
• HVAC Maintenance Lessons: Emphasizes the critical role of regular home maintenance and the often-overlooked dependencies within household systems.
• Commencement Speech Experiences: Showcases the challenges and humorous moments involved in public speaking and engaging diverse audiences.
• Audience Engagement: Demonstrates the podcast’s interactive nature and commitment to involving listeners in discussions.
• Everyday Life Stories: Provides relatable content that resonates with listeners navigating similar life events and challenges.

Overall, Episode #327 of You Betcha Radio offers a blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and insightful discussions that encapsulate the Midwestern spirit, fostering a strong connection with its audience.

Transcript

[Miles]

On today's episode, we talk Luke from the Outdoor Boys Channel. My new H Vac blues and how my commencement speech went. So, guys, enjoy the episode. Ryan is still out this week due to paternity leave, so he'll be back next week.

[Tyler]

Got pour some water out for him.

[Miles]

Yeah. But be huge news over the weekend.

[Jared]

The biggest.

[Miles]

The biggest since sliced bread. Like, I imagine when sliced bread happened, that had to have been huge news.

[Tyler]

It had to have been.

[Miles]

I mean, it had to have been all over the wire, all over the paper. Yeah. Suppose it wasn't even a wire back then.

[Jared]

I don't know.

[Miles]

But Luke from the Outdoor Boys Channel has officially retired. Let's let that sink in.

[Tyler]

Remote silencing.

[Miles]

Yeah, we were letting it sink in. That's what we were doing.

[Jared]

It's made of Tobato.

[Miles]

Yeah. Yeah. He put out a video of him sitting on a log talking about why he's quitting. All that other stuff I want to dive into a little bit because I have my thoughts. I knew this was gonna happen when he. I watched him do a video where he was doing his thing, and he just had, like, six things go wrong. And, like, he was in pain. His little, like, it's not like a snowmobile. It's like a. Basically like a dog sled. A motorized dog sled. I don't know what it's actually called. Yeah, that thing, like, broke down. Whatever. And then he was just like, you know what, guys? I've made the decision that I'm going to post once every other week. I'm not going to be posting every week anymore. And I saw. I could. You know what he was saying is that what I saw in his eyeballs was, I am so over this.

[Tyler]

The beginning of the end.

[Miles]

It was the beginning of the end because there's been times when we've been doing content where I've had that look in my eye of like, man, this is. We've done a lot of videos, and I just feel a little burnt out, and I just. I'm. I'm done. So I. I saw that look because I've had that look before, and I knew that that was beginning of the end.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Because it's like. Yeah, it's like, once you. Like, even now, like, I could not imagine having to do his job while having kids.

[Tyler]

No, dude.

[Jared]

Traveling. Yeah. Everything. Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah. It'd be terrible.

[Tyler]

Just think about, like, you felt that. And our prep is, somebody get some props, grab some camera gear, and then we go shoot for. For three to five hours maybe.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

He's gone for the whole weekend, burying himself in snow, sleeping on logs.

[Miles]

He doesn't even get a sleeping bag.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And if you felt it, he's got to have felt it. Obviously feels toasty.

[Miles]

Yeah. I feel like the biggest thing is just like idea fatigue for us. It's like feel like we're just putting out the same thing all the time. That's where we run into jobs. But yeah, I knew that that was the beginning of the end. But he also didn't say he was done forever.

[Jared]

Right.

[Miles]

I just wanted to throw that out there.

[Tyler]

He did say indefinite, which I'm calling in here.

[Miles]

He. He. I don't know if he said indefinitely.

[Tyler]

I thought so.

[Miles]

I thought he just said. I. He just kept saying be taking a break for. Or I'm going to be done for a while.

[Jared]

Yeah. That could mean a def. That's sort of indefinitely.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Like we don't. He could be back in a month.

[Miles]

I don't think he'll be back in a month, but I think in a few years he's going to resurface.

[Tyler]

Yeah. I could see a break. I could just. I think he could. In the meantime, just post some tips like, you don't need to go out in the woods and suffer for a weekend to just tell us how to make this one thing.

[Miles]

Yeah. Like you don't need to. Like that video. I watched him blacksmithing a machete.

[Tyler]

Right.

[Miles]

Just do that in your driveway. Yeah, I'll still watch it.

[Tyler]

Yeah, you've got, You've earned the support. We'll. Yeah, we'll watch you teach us how to make honey bread in your kitchen.

[Miles]

Yeah, for sure.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah. Do a cooking channel.

[Tyler]

You could.

[Miles]

In your kitchen and people would still watch that.

[Tyler]

Luke from the Indoor Boys. Complete rebrand.

[Miles]

The Indoor Boys. Yeah. So I think he'll be back. I. I mean, honestly, he's been doing it for like, I don't know, something like 10, 15 years. Like you, you earned a break.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Dude. Don't feel bad, Luke, if you're. We know you're listening. Don't feel bad about this. You earned it.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

How is he gonna unwind? Because, like his favorite thing is go out in the woods. But is that like a trigger for him?

[Miles]

Yeah. I don't know.

[Jared]

Stressed out now.

[Tyler]

I wonder if it's gonna be like super freeing for him to go out into the woods and not have a camera.

[Jared]

Right.

[Tyler]

And just do the shitty wants.

[Jared]

Or maybe I'll just get into like VR, like big time gamer vibes.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

It's going outside.

[Miles]

Just the complete opposite.

[Tyler]

The Dubai.

[Miles]

But he also said that his kids are like doing YouTube channel. So he's just basically turning into a producer coach.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jared]

Pyramid scheme.

[Tyler]

Are they part of the outdoor boys?

[Miles]

I think that they are the outdoor boys. Hell, I think that's what it started as.

[Tyler]

So did he said that he got too famous? Which we are. We were. We're a little guilty of. We did spread the gospel of Luke.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean it's one of those things that I do get it. But also he had to know what he was getting into. He's posted over a thousand videos on YouTube. A little bit, you know.

[Tyler]

Yeah, you wanted this point.

[Miles]

But like, so when people will come to me like, hey, does it get exhausting like people coming up to you, whatever. And what I always tell them, that is like one. This is what I signed up for. This is part of the job. I cannot compl. I can't be happy about the stuff that I get to do because of this job. And then about that part of the job, like goes hand inand. I cannot complain about that. And I always say, like, it's my fault. We're the ones pressing post every single time we do it. Like, you could just stop doing that. And I was kind of thinking like, well, he did. He just decided to just stop pressing post.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You know what I mean?

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So kudos to him. It's like that's how you get off the. But it's also now by him retiring, like him officially announcing a retirement is now making him more famous.

[Tyler]

Right.

[Miles]

Saw a post on Facebook that like was a screenshot of the video. And like YouTuber retires indefinitely. And like a bunch of people are like, I didn't know who this guy was. If he just would have just stopped posting and not done an announcement. It wouldn't. He would have now he's become way more famous.

[Tyler]

It's genius. I think he doesn't have to work, he doesn't have to post any more videos and he's still going to rake in the ad money because he just got a brand new audience, dude.

[Miles]

God, we got to announce our retirement.

[Tyler]

Yeah. We got to do our fifth AC DC farewell tour.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah. He's like, Jordan going baseball. He's going to go help his kid with his channel and then come back at jersey number 45 and he's going.

[Tyler]

To have a YouTube video with 40 million views that's three seconds long. It just says I'm back.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

I like to imagine before that final video, like, it was going all fine and dandy and then something broke and then you decided, I'm quit.

[Tyler]

Little do you know, like that he's sitting on the log or whatever giving his farewell speech. Just off screen to the right is his burnt down tent.

[Miles]

Yeah, exactly.

[Jared]

He had no plans to retire.

[Miles]

Goes up in flames and he just goes, we're done, we're done. You know, like some of his stuff is like ASMR vibes, you know. I imagine though there's some outtakes of him just in the middle of the woods and I bet he's just let out some screams. Just pissed. Had to have.

[Tyler]

I hope so. I hope he releases a behind the scenes cut one time. No, Luke played it right. He's going to keep raking in the money. He's going to be able to continue to do this stuff if he wants. The going out in public is going to be tough for him. He's going to need a disguise. I think, I think it's time for Luke to grow a beard.

[Miles]

And I do think that he like definitely did not want to become this famous. You don't move to Alaska and do what he's doing if you want to be really famous. So I, I buy that aspect. I think it's. He liked like probably when he had a couple million subscribers was probably like the sweet spot for him. And then he just went and I guess we're part of the problem. We were talking about him. I don't know.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Gospel of Luke. We spread it to all the patrons.

[Miles]

Yeah. But yeah, I think he'll be back at some point. I mean we basically like had six months. Well, we didn't post anything in this company's history because I was kind of burnt out. And then like you just come back feeling refreshed. He'll be back.

[Tyler]

I think you will be too.

[Jared]

Yeah. You could do like two videos a year even. It doesn't have to be every week.

[Miles]

Yeah. Like one every six weeks. People would be happy about that.

[Tyler]

And then just retire after everyone. You'll get all this press and the ad dollars will keep coming in.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean really what he should do is just start reposting all of his videos for sure. And just re. Rake in all the dough.

[Tyler]

I mean he's got time to kill. He could release extended cuts of every single video because you know he's cutting a ton of out.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

And he's good. He's got.

[Miles]

Let's do the extended cut, like add an extra five minutes of stuff. So.

[Jared]

And they do a meme Coin, too.

[Tyler]

You know what? Maybe this. This could be a play. Maybe he's going to be on this show alone.

[Miles]

That'd be kind of cool.

[Tyler]

Maybe he's retiring.

[Miles]

Conspiracy. About that. He's got a. The conspiracy was that he. He has a show planned with a network, and the network doesn't want his YouTube channel competing with their show because.

[Tyler]

The YouTube channel would crush the show.

[Jared]

Correct.

[Miles]

Yeah, but it also doesn't make sense because he would make way more money just doing the YouTube and he. His TV shows don't pay you unless you're Seinfeld.

[Tyler]

The network. The network's just like, come on, Luke. You said he didn't want to be famous. Now no one's gonna watch our show.

[Miles]

Right? Yeah. Yeah. Smart. I don't want to be famous. Makes him more famous. So, you know, good luck, Luke, and whatever you choose to do next. But we'll see. We'll. You'll be back.

[Tyler]

Yeah, we'll see again.

[Jared]

Yeah, for sure.

[Tyler]

A lot of the patrons want to know if we're going to name our studio after him.

[Miles]

If he would have said, I'm never posting another video again, then I would.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Miles]

But because he said, I'm taking a break for a while for the foreseeable future, he'll be back.

[Tyler]

Yeah. We can't name the studio after him until he's officially done. Done.

[Jared]

Right. I think I give it like five years. If he doesn't post a video for five years that we can name the studio.

[Miles]

Yes.

[Tyler]

And he'll come back in five and a half. That son of a.

[Jared]

He just time it out so he gets the studio named after him.

[Tyler]

Yeah, he's a patron.

[Miles]

Yeah. Right. All right, guys, prize picks, time of the week. And right now, if you sign up with code YBR, you get 50 instantly when you play your first five dollar lineup. You don't even need to win the lineup to receive the 50 bonus. It's guaranteed. You just got to use code YBR. And Jared, we got a listener who sent in a winning lineup, correct?

[Jared]

Yep. Listener Gavin Spiral won 35 bucks. He had Shane Smith, Aaron Jones judge, and Christophis Porzingis three man lineup and he won 35 bucks.

[Miles]

Do we know how much you put on it?

[Jared]

1750.

[Tyler]

Doubled it.

[Miles]

Double your money.

[Tyler]

Heck yeah.

[Miles]

Easy peasy, lemon squeezy. And that's just, you know, it's.

[Tyler]

It's. It's always really fun when people are sending in their slit picks.

[Miles]

I love getting slit picks. So if you could slide into my DNS and send me your Slit picks.

[Tyler]

These are solicited slit pics.

[Miles]

I want only solicited slit picks. And they're all welcome, so. All right, this week we got where Ryan's gone. What did Ryan pick?

[Jared]

He got Miles Turner, more than six and a half rebounds.

[Miles]

Miles Turner, six and a half rebounds. Jared, what do you got?

[Jared]

Pascal siakam, more than 18 and a half points.

[Miles]

More than 18 and a half. I also have a miles. Two miles. In this lineup, I have Miles McBride. He's just gotta make two three pointers. Done.

[Tyler]

He can do it.

[Miles]

He did it the last three games.

[Tyler]

No.

[Miles]

No way.

[Jared]

He's a good bench player.

[Tyler]

I got Carl Anthony towns, more than 34 and a half points and rebounds.

[Miles]

You pick him because you know he's got a special place in your heart being a T Wolves guy.

[Tyler]

Yes. And also, I picked him two weeks ago and he hasn't lost for me yet.

[Miles]

Let's go. I like that.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I'm on three in a row, right?

[Miles]

You gotta ride and you gotta ride into towns.

[Jared]

Oh, wow.

[Tyler]

Yeah, that's good.

[Miles]

I'mma take my horse to the old, old. So, guys, you want to ride with us? That's McBride, Sekam, Turner, and Towns. I went. So I did see Ryan this weekend.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Miles]

I went to Ryan's house. So first of all, Ryan's lived in this house for three months. Never got an invite to go see his new house.

[Tyler]

He showed me the outside.

[Miles]

It literally took him having a child for me to get invited to his house. You kid. You kid. You forget when you. When you see a newborn baby, forget how small they start.

[Tyler]

It's weird. Especially, like, for us right now that have basically one year olds and that's still a baby to us. And then you hold a newborn. Like, holy.

[Miles]

Yeah, like, literally, like hold them like that.

[Jared]

Fresh off the assembly line.

[Tyler]

Yep, Yep.

[Miles]

So he's doing good. His house is nice. Ryan's not lying. When I pulled up to his house, he was standing. I think he started a burn pot, burn barrel. Just because he knew I was coming. There was smoke coming out of his burn barrel. And we ate dinner, whatever. And then he's like, how big did I say that that pile was? I was like. I was like, I think you said 10 by 10. He's like, come look at the one I got now. You tell. You tell me if I'm exaggerating. And I. We looked at that pile. It's definitely bigger at 10.

[Tyler]

That's why he took three months to invite you. He had to make sure the pile was big enough yeah, he's.

[Miles]

He's got a big burn coming up, and it's a lot of limbs.

[Tyler]

It's a lot.

[Miles]

And it's just still too close to the woods.

[Tyler]

Where is he getting it all from?

[Miles]

So he's got, like, shitloads of woods behind his.

[Tyler]

But those aren't his.

[Miles]

Doesn't he own. Wouldn't he own the land up to. Because I think there's, like, a river there, isn't there?

[Tyler]

Yeah, but he. It's. He showed me the lines on the map. The woods isn't his.

[Miles]

Maybe it's just, like, the branches that are. I don't know. It's basically like a bunch of stuff that came down during a storm and whatever. I don't know. Either that or he's just cleaning it up.

[Tyler]

Bored burning.

[Miles]

So, yeah, it's entirely too close to the woods still. And he definitely should have been burning that when he did because we, like, were kind of in.

[Jared]

Territory.

[Tyler]

We had three days of rain. We're out of it.

[Miles]

Well, now, but when he did the first run.

[Jared]

Yeah, it was a little.

[Miles]

Yeah, but that's. Yeah, I would say this one's maybe more like 15 by 15.

[Tyler]

Hell yeah, Ryan.

[Miles]

And I'm just worried that this is not gonna stop at that. I think it's gonna be. He's gonna then have, like, a football field of stuff he's gonna burn, and then he's gonna get a north wind that's gonna burn his house down.

[Tyler]

He's gotta have that hose ready, spray down the trees.

[Miles]

Like, if he was doing this in the middle of, like, a. Like a field or whatever. But again, there's trees right there to just go up.

[Tyler]

Should just wait till winter. You don't need a burn permit for anything if there's more than two inches of snow.

[Miles]

Perfect.

[Jared]

You think? Wait, though.

[Miles]

No, but it was funny. Something that I notice is when you go see someone's new house for the first time, you always have to act way more interested in stuff than maybe you really are. You know what I mean?

[Tyler]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Miles]

It's like you're. Now your. Your whole job when you're looking at someone's new house is to look at all the details and compliment them so they feel validated for all of the time that they spent on those details.

[Tyler]

Because, you know, they got samples. They looked at five different options.

[Miles]

They had an argument about which toilet to get.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And it totally depends on who's hosting you because they're going to show the stuff that they picked. So, like, all the arguments Ryan won. He for sure showed you those first.

[Miles]

Yes. Yeah. Yeah.

[Tyler]

So, like, if Ryan showed you the cabinets, they definitely picked the cabins he wanted.

[Miles]

Yeah, I mean, he. He got me in the garage pretty fast.

[Tyler]

Hell, yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

That's the only one he wanted is the garage.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Come check this out.

[Miles]

It's also funny. It's like, again, I would have never noticed it, but. So, like, he was like, all right, at some point, I'm gonna, like, finish my garage to, like, you know, tape texture, like, make it a real wall in there. But the only one that was finished was where all of his workout equipment is, and it was, like, painted and stuff. He's like, I don't want to have to take all this stuff off or paint around. I was like, yeah, it makes sense. And then he went into thing about how he decided not to put texture on the wall. You're like, I. Dude, I would have never have noticed.

[Tyler]

But now, getting ahead of it, in case you brought it up, he doesn't want a shiplap trim 2.0.

[Miles]

Yeah. Another thing I noticed, too, is Midwesterners are obsessed with storage.

[Tyler]

Oh, yeah, dude.

[Miles]

Ryan's got this nice new house. Looks great. But the thing he was most giddy about was his big storage room.

[Tyler]

Dude, I get it. I just got a new house in one of the. Like, I had to make sure I showed people how much storage we had in the basement. Yeah, like, we have a whole ass room just for storage. That's triple our old house. And I was proud as of that. You gotta come check.

[Miles]

It was like. He's like, hey, you gotta come check this out. He, like, opens the door, flips the light on. It's just a bunch of his junk.

[Tyler]

It's totes. It's just totes stacked on totes stacked on toast.

[Miles]

He's like, look at this room. Like, God, so nice, Isn't it? And I was like, it is. And then I was like, yeah, got more swords than me.

[Jared]

Yeah, you got more than I do.

[Miles]

It's.

[Tyler]

It's a badge of honor because we're. We're all Midwesterners, are all pseudo hoarders, and we all accept that. And so we all. Instead of bragging about how much stuff we have, we brag about where we can put it. So we all got too much.

[Miles]

Yeah, dude, you get a Midwesterner with a fresh new shelf that they put up for storage. I mean, it's like they had a child. They're showing them off to the world.

[Tyler]

Or.

[Jared]

Yeah. It's like buying a new Tote. Like, look at this new tote. And it's just. Oh, they're all the same, dude.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

I keep getting videos on tote storage solutions. Like the slide in deals like you build the wood racks aren't sick. I. I'm working on it. I.

[Miles]

There's a storage system for the bed of your truck where you slide them in and out. I don't know if you've seen that before.

[Tyler]

Like, the ones that lock in.

[Miles]

Yeah, it look wheat. The only problem is, like, I put it in, and then, like, I'd have to, like, transport something, and then it's.

[Tyler]

That isn't a tote.

[Miles]

Well, it's just like. Then you're like, you bring a grill. Like, the whole grill is gonna be sticking above the thing because it, like, basically adds a foot less to your bed. But I do want one of those. That's. That I put up shelving in my garage. Super proud of it.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Hell yeah.

[Miles]

Loved it. Yeah. It's just so funny that that's, like, the thing that people care the most about in the Midwest is how much storage that house has.

[Tyler]

And I'm honestly interested to see it every time, too. Like, you. Everyone will make a comment. Like, when I was giving people tours of my house, like, oh, you got a lot of space to put stuff. It's like, people care about it too. So, like, yeah, I could show you that. This. The. The room I put all my animals in. I think I decorated it super well. No, I'm bringing you straight to my storage room to show you how I organize my Christmas decorations.

[Miles]

See, I got them labeled. This is for the. This is for the. Over the garage. That's the thing. So I got to finish off my basement at some point and. And not thinking about that stuff, you know, she's not thinking about storage. She's just thinking, we could put a couch here and a bedro and a bathroom here. And I'm like, we need to create a storage room, because all of the stuff that you see just sitting in this open basement has to go somewhere, right?

[Tyler]

We're not throwing away rummage sale, dude. I've been hitting rubber sales hard lately. It's like. It's like the opposite of Midwesterners being proud of having storage. It's them being proud of all the shit they can sell that they don't need anymore.

[Miles]

Well, it's that. But then. So they sell all the stuff, but then they love garage sales where they go buy more crap to put in their storage room. It's an endless cycle Recycle.

[Tyler]

Yep. Hey, good on us though.

[Miles]

Go to a garage sale, acquire crap, store crap, sell crap, acquire crap. That's just. That is the Midwest cycle over and over again. Sometimes you didn't have to go to garage sale to acquire. You just get stuff from your dad or your grandparents, pick it up on.

[Tyler]

The side of the road.

[Miles]

I feel like grandparents reach an age where like you go and visit them and then as you're like going out the door, they just try and get hand you all of their stuff.

[Tyler]

Totally.

[Miles]

They're like, we're gonna die soon. We gotta start getting rid of stuff. You just take this lamp home.

[Tyler]

You just get this out of here.

[Miles]

Like, don't comment on anything at your grandparents house because then they'll just give it to you. Or just like, oh, that's a cool lamp. Do you want it? Take it, it's yours.

[Tyler]

Now just start commenting on the. You.

[Miles]

Yeah, there you go.

[Tyler]

Like, oh, yeah. This, this shelf right here would be great storage for me. I really like it.

[Miles]

You know, I really like your house, Don. It's yours.

[Tyler]

Take it.

[Miles]

Here's the keys.

[Jared]

They have to say yes.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

It should work with grandpa's tools. Like, I really like your chainsaw. It's really nice. Looks good. Here.

[Miles]

Tell you what though, Ryan's lawn looks like shit.

[Tyler]

Well, it's just mud, isn't it? Yeah. He doesn't have a lawn yet. He'll get on it. Yeah, after he's done with the burn piles.

[Jared]

But that eats out. I'm not having a lush lawn right now.

[Miles]

Yeah, but he's so preoccupied with all the sticks and logs around that he's burning that. I don't think he's even thought about it. I don't think he's that worried about it.

[Tyler]

He'll get there.

[Miles]

I think actually it's because there's no grass. It's. He doesn't think about it, doesn't care. But if he had grass and it wasn't growing very well, that would eat the hell out of them.

[Jared]

That makes sense.

[Miles]

You know what I mean?

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Give it a few years.

[Tyler]

Yeah, he brought us there, me and Noah there one time after golfing, and he didn't even bring us in. He brought us to his house, pulled into the driveway, he's like, there it is. And then turned around. I was like, I kind of wanted to see your house.

[Miles]

No, because he's so worried that we'll want to shoot videos there like we used to at his old house.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I honestly think that that's a Real concern of his.

[Jared]

I believe that that was your thoughts walking through his house, like, yeah, we could shoot.

[Tyler]

Did you make any comments here?

[Miles]

And go stand over there once. That's good lighting. I think that that's.

[Tyler]

Did you put that window there on purpose for us?

[Jared]

Just framing up angles. Yeah.

[Miles]

You know someone. I mean, you guys know this. You guys both acquired new houses recently. It's like, you start commenting on stuff you never think about, right? Like, I was watching my plate after dinner, and Anne was like, oh, God. How do you. How do you like your sink? Because before, you guys had the double sink. But this one's just a big open one. Like, oh, we love it. We love it.

[Jared]

It's a nice door hinge.

[Tyler]

Well, and as the host, too, like, when you're giving somebody the tour, you find the most random to point out, be like, hey, do you see what I did here? You like. You like how I put this trim up like that?

[Miles]

Oh, you see how the. The cabinets are soft? Close. So go ahead, slam it. It won't.

[Tyler]

You can't. You can try, but don't slam it too hard.

[Miles]

But don't slam it too hard.

[Tyler]

Don't break my.

[Jared]

And if there's, like, something, like, messed up with it, you're like, yeah, the previous homeowner. I don't know what the hell they were doing.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

And, yeah, you buy. Not a. You don't build a home. You just buy a home. It's the. Immediately. The previous homeowners were the dumbest people ever. Why on earth would they put a wall here? Why would they paint this room this color?

[Tyler]

Well, we had a. It's two little old people that we bought the. The house from. So much floral wallpaper everywhere.

[Miles]

I mean, but that's had to have been up since the 90s for sure.

[Tyler]

For sure.

[Miles]

80S maybe.

[Tyler]

And every person that toured our house, they all asked this question, what are you gonna change first? So what are you guys gonna do? What different are you guys gonna do with it? And a lot of the time, I wanted to be like, I. I like it. I'm gonna leave it. And just to. With them. I ain't changing the thing. I'm gonna leave it like this forever. But my wife, every time, it was the wallpaper. Always talking about the wallpaper.

[Miles]

Do you think anyone's ever moved into a house and not painted at least one wall? I feel like that's just what you have to do. You move into a house, you have to paint something that makes it yours.

[Tyler]

It's true, you know, you got to change it a little bit. We still haven't painted a wall because all the wallpaper's not down. Once it's down, then we'll be painting.

[Miles]

So is it, like, the stuff where you gotta, like, score it and then scrape it off? Oh, yeah, you told us about that.

[Tyler]

Yeah, once. I've been waiting for us to get the. The Mr. Fix it party bus, but we might.

[Miles]

Have to skip your house on that tour. That sounds like a nightmare.

[Tyler]

So it's like, we'll make it last so we're can.

[Miles]

Yeah, that is. It would be a huge buzz kill to have to take wallpaper off. Yeah, that would suck.

[Tyler]

We'll be blacked out by then, so we won't even remember doing it.

[Jared]

What if we knock the wall down?

[Tyler]

It's my stairwell. I need it.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Miles]

Not. Yeah, so, like, you're. We're kind of saying that, like, they point out features that no one would ever. Ryan had to show me. So in his whole. Well, first of all, he goes, well, I had to buy blinds for the first time. And if anyone. If you've ever bought blinds, there's no other explanation that needs to be said because they're so expensive, so.

[Tyler]

Really?

[Miles]

Yeah, they're unbelievably expensive.

[Tyler]

Huh?

[Miles]

Like, obviously, you can go to, like, Lowe's or Home Depot or whatever and just buy their, like, cheaper ones, but if you want nice blinds, they are an arm and a leg nightmare.

[Tyler]

Damn.

[Miles]

And so from what I was gathering is he really only bought, like, three blinds for his. I. I didn't do enough looking to see how many blinds, but he basically told me, he's like, we. And we didn't even buy the blinds for the whole house. But he did buy blinds for his bedroom, and he did the automatic ones. It's just on a remote, and so we had to put those up, up and down a couple times.

[Tyler]

But did you tell about your automatic woes where, like, the batteries are dying at different times?

[Miles]

Yeah, it's tough.

[Tyler]

So you got to make sure you swap them at the exact.

[Miles]

That might be my most subtle flex of all time is that I have automatic lines that go up and down with the sunset and sunrise.

[Tyler]

Did you time it or does it know the sunset?

[Miles]

So just whatever. Because you. You give, like, your area code, like, your zip code, and then it just, like, knows approximately one time. That's my small, subtle, biggest flex, is that I have that at my house. Did I need to. No Looking back, was it worth the money? Maybe. Big maybe because I. In the stairwell the ones up top you can't reach, they go out of batteries. So then they just stay closed all day. And then, like, once, you know, after two months of it, I'm like, all right, I'll grab the ladder and change out the batteries. Like, each one. Each one, no lie has, like. You have to put in, like, 10 to 12 batteries.

[Jared]

Oh, my gosh.

[Tyler]

I feel like that should last 10 years.

[Miles]

You'd think it probably doesn't help that we just, like, bought, like, hundreds of the Amazon batteries that are just shitty. Yeah, but they're, you know, they're cheap compared to the other ones.

[Jared]

That's what you get.

[Miles]

But, yeah, Ryan, he's proud of those blinds. They're cool. Yeah, definitely cool.

[Tyler]

Blackout. Nice.

[Miles]

Yeah, so I got. That's how it goes. You just get all the stuff that you wouldn't. Because it was in his bedroom. Like, I hope I'm never in his bedroom ever again.

[Tyler]

You saw the blinds, and that's it. That's all you.

[Miles]

Yeah. I don't know if you guys ever felt this. You get a house tour. It'd be different if they just moved in. But he's been in that house for three months, and I. He, like, was showing me their master bathroom, and I was a little, like, on. I'm like, I feel like I shouldn't.

[Tyler]

Be in here intruding.

[Miles]

This is probably the one. This is the one area I didn't need to see. The master bathroom.

[Tyler]

You want to take me back out to the garage Quick? I think I missed some stuff.

[Miles]

So he did reveal to me that he has taken a bath in their.

[Tyler]

New bathtub, as one does when they're giving a tour.

[Miles]

Well, no, I was like, you've been taking some baths? Kind of. Joking, joking. He's like, I've taken one bath. And then he goes, you know. You know what I concluded? I don't think I'm a bath guy. He's like, I get too hot. I'm like, well, then just don't. Yeah, but he did bring up a good point that you can't enjoy a bath because the whole time you're just worried about keeping the temperature right.

[Jared]

Right.

[Miles]

It's too hot. Then you gotta turn on the cold, and then it starts getting too cold, so you gotta turn the warm water back on, and it's the whole thing. Then it gets too full, so you got to empty some of the water out.

[Jared]

And you're thinking, why don't I just take a shower right now?

[Miles]

A shower?

[Tyler]

I'm. I'm pretty sure when you built your house, we did a whole bit about how we are bath guys.

[Miles]

Yeah, I think Ryan has gone back on that after more experience.

[Tyler]

No, I think. I think we're just getting older and we don't know. We're not around with baths anymore.

[Miles]

Yeah, books, you know, we got kids running around.

[Tyler]

We can't just dip out and leave our kids while we take a bath.

[Miles]

Music, the whole thing.

[Jared]

Ambient noise.

[Miles]

So, yeah, Ryan's got a nice house. Good to see him. Feel like I haven't seen him in six months. Yeah, felt like he, like. It's like. Like he got like a week's release off of his deployment to come back to the States.

[Tyler]

It's kind of what it felt like seeing him even though he was here half the week. Last week he showed up three of the five days.

[Miles]

I also have some news about my house, so. Me in the ass, dude. So last week when it was like 90. Of course AC wasn't working in my house. H vac issues, HVAC blues. H vac blues. Doesn't matter what place I'm at, whether it's here, home. I got H vac blues. Well, I called the H vac guy.

[Tyler]

And.

[Jared]

He'S like, you just know him so well at this point.

[Tyler]

I called Jim and yeah, so he.

[Miles]

Was actually over for dinner and telling him what was going on. First of all, the night before, I, like, gone through Chad GPT trying to diagnose the problem. Couldn't figure it out. Working with messing with the dampers and. Which I probably shouldn't have been doing, but I learned a little bit more about it. Well, it turns out that whatever. I don't know if it's the coil or whatever froze over, so probably inside and the one like on the unit outside. Like, we're talking like three quarters of an inch of ice on this thing.

[Tyler]

Which is crazy because it was 90 degrees last week.

[Miles]

Well, so here, let me get there. Tyler.

[Tyler]

Okay. Because I. I saw your coil. You showed me it when I was at your house shooting, for sure. Frozen over.

[Miles]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, so we shut the system off to then get it to melt, and then we're going to go from there. The H Vac guy comes over and he concluded that it probably happened because I didn't change the air filter.

[Tyler]

Shut the.

[Miles]

Oh, no.

[Tyler]

Miles.

[Jared]

How.

[Miles]

Why do we. Why is that a. Why can't we figure something else out?

[Tyler]

This is a totally different conversation three months ago, if you didn't just go through this.

[Miles]

Now, I have been decent about changing the air filters, so When I take an air filter out that's spent a mouse, I just put. I don't throw it away. I just like put it in the corner because I don't. I'm not gonna throw it away. There was one that was way dirtier than the one I pulled out. So I was. I'm still a little skeptical that that was the exact issue. But yeah, I mean, wow.

[Tyler]

You literally had a whole monologue about how you're gonna change your ways. And the office filters are on you.

[Miles]

And my home filters are also on me. So I'm dialed in now though. This week I'm gonna locate. I'm gonna figure out what air filters I need to buy. I'm gonna buy them this week. I'm gonna change the ones here. I already changed the one in my house, so we're good there. And I'm gonna. I have reminders on my Google calendar to change them out every, like, I don't know, week. Every week. At this point.

[Tyler]

This weekend you need to check your filters at your lake cabin.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah, well, they're wall units, so.

[Tyler]

Check if those have killed.

[Jared]

I would just check.

[Miles]

Just.

[Tyler]

Just give it a quick look over.

[Miles]

Yeah, I probably do need to change those out too.

[Jared]

Does it hurt to check?

[Miles]

I just. I hate it. I don't know. It's so easy to do, but I just hate it. It's.

[Tyler]

It's less than a minute of work.

[Miles]

Just. Why can't we figure out a filterless system?

[Tyler]

I. I don't know.

[Miles]

We can put a man on the moon, but we can't figure out a filterless air system?

[Jared]

I'm sure spaceships have.

[Miles]

Why can't we just use lasers or something to just do something to the air?

[Tyler]

Then that would overshadow your automatic blinds. Your flex would be your laser filter.

[Miles]

So I have decided though, that I am gonna invent a new product. And it's gonna be. It's gonna be like. Think like meat thermometer sized product. Okay.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Miles]

It's gonna be magnetic. You'll be able to magnet it to your furnace or wherever. Yeah. And then it's just a timer with a really loud alarm. So when you change the air filter, you click however many months you want it to go out, you said. And then it. Whatever. And then whenever that time is up, just a loud. And then you have to go change the air filter, you gotta go down to the furnace room to shut the alarm off. Because I know what's gonna happen is I'm gonna get a Google calendar invite on my calendar. To change out the air filters and be like, yeah, I gotta do that today.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

But if there's a loud beeping noise going on in my furnace room, I have to go down there to shut it off. I'll just change the air filter start.

[Jared]

Yeah. It's kind of like when your sub pump isn't working.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Like a sump pump alert.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Noise or whatever.

[Tyler]

Yes. It. You just gotta make sure you change the batteries on your alarm.

[Miles]

Maybe we'll do a wall plug in.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

Plugin. Yeah.

[Tyler]

In that room.

[Miles]

You're right. I would not have thought of that. And then it would have been a disaster.

[Tyler]

And you get a Google calendar thing to change the batteries on the alarm and you'd forget.

[Jared]

No. The wall outlet though, the power goes out, it resets, the whole thing starts over.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean the alternatives, we just to be a responsible adult.

[Jared]

All these failures.

[Miles]

I just don't see that happening.

[Jared]

What was your initial reaction when the H Vac guy told you was the filter?

[Miles]

I was just thinking these guys are gonna never let me live this time.

[Tyler]

That's what I'm gonna get you for Christmas every year, actually. Great gifts, some air filters.

[Miles]

Yeah. So I wonder what the bill is going to be on that.

[Tyler]

What does Anne say?

[Miles]

It's just. It's just you realize she lives with me every day, so this is. Stuff like this happens all the time.

[Jared]

She's dumb.

[Tyler]

Yeah, well, she's. Yeah, she's overheating because the AC is out.

[Miles]

But. But that, but they don't tell you how much stuff can go wrong by not changing the air filter. Because they make air filters seem like they are like this thing to just clean your air. You know, it's like, oh, you want high quality air, just throw a air filter. That's what they make it seem like, right? That's what they make it seem like. I know there's other stuff that it does. That's what make it seem like they hand over the keys to the house. They're like, yeah, air filters are just keep your air filtered. They don't tell you that the entire H Vac system is dependent on these air filters.

[Jared]

But they tell you to change them every few.

[Tyler]

They do.

[Miles]

But they did. They're like, yeah, every like six to, you know, eight months. Change them out if it's that critical to the system. Don't give me a ballpark. Don't tell me every four to eight months. Tell me exactly when I say if. They said every 182 days you have to change out this air filter. My head goes, if it's just that important that they have to give me to the day, this is important to the system. But when they're like, yeah, every like, you know, four to 18 months, change these suckers out. You're like, okay, this doesn't matter. If it really mattered, they'd be much more specific. They just don't. They don't tell you that. They don't. They don't tell you that the entire system is dependent off these flimsy cardboard filters.

[Jared]

These ass filters.

[Miles]

How can my entire house be dependent on an air filter?

[Tyler]

You know now.

[Miles]

I know now. Why don't they teach you that in school?

[Tyler]

Keeping this out of there.

[Miles]

Teaching me about derivatives in calculus class when they should be teaching me that your house will explode if you don't change out the air filters. You will be knocked back into the stone age if you don't change out your air filters.

[Tyler]

We talked about this at your house too. That was the first thing we brought up. We're like, hey, did you change your air filter? You're like, yeah, I've been good at it.

[Miles]

Well, yeah, I feel like. I feel like it's been six months since I changed my air filter. Which to me like, okay, let's say they say it's every four months. If you're a hard all about it. You should be able to go six months though, changing your air filter. I mean, what happened? Yeah, I don't know what.

[Tyler]

I don't know what to say to. I don't know what to say.

[Miles]

Can you at least agree that they don't put enough emphasis on how much the air filter matters?

[Tyler]

I can agree with that. The importance is overshadowed.

[Jared]

It just kind of implied. I don't know.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I don't know. I. I've just been. I've always been harped at my whole life to be changing these things. And I always had landlords, like sending out emails, like, change your air filters now.

[Miles]

Yeah, I don't know. I guess I just didn't get the memo.

[Tyler]

Ask your dad how often he changes his.

[Miles]

I will, I will. But then I'll have to tell him why I'm asking it.

[Tyler]

You say Chase is asking.

[Jared]

Yeah, just say Aaron is asking.

[Miles]

I got into argument with Anne and I just want to be right.

[Tyler]

Yeah, that's perfect.

[Miles]

Then whatever he says. Yeah, that's what I said.

[Jared]

I just dig in a hole.

[Miles]

I just can't believe it'd be like you're in. It'd be like, your car will explode if you don't make sure that the windshield wiper fluid is full.

[Tyler]

Think of it like this.

[Miles]

Like this equivalent.

[Jared]

I don't know about that.

[Tyler]

You got think of it like this. Your body's filter is your liver. You need that liver to survive.

[Miles]

Yeah, but you don't have to change out your liver every four months, do you, Tyler?

[Tyler]

No, but if you lost your liver, if your liver was too full of, your body would explode. Same as your air conditioning.

[Miles]

Okay, it's a good example. But again, God designed humans to not have to change out their liver. He's like, hey, if this matters this much to this shit, we probably shouldn't leave it up to humans to change out their liver, because they're not going to remember. I'll just make it work as long as they're not poisoning it forever.

[Tyler]

But. But man is not as complicated as God.

[Miles]

But why can't they just invent a filterless system?

[Jared]

I mean, humans been around for, I don't know, millions of years, so it took a lot of time for that to be a thing.

[Miles]

I bet it worked day one. I bet the liver in humans works day one. Jared, do not think it had to develop.

[Jared]

All right, but H Vac's been only been around for like, I don't know, 100 years.

[Miles]

That is true. We are in the infant stage.

[Jared]

Right, so working out the cakes in the beta stage.

[Miles]

Yeah. I just think that if you could invent a thing you don't have to change out the filter on. You're going to make so much money. But then probably not, because people are like, well, that's down. Why would I pay an extra $2,000 for a system that I could just change out the air filters and that.

[Jared]

Big filter is going to come after you and kill you.

[Tyler]

That's not good. They're making buck 92 on each filter, everyone.

[Miles]

It's. I'm not proud that I've had to learn this filter lesson the way that I did. But everyone learns at different paces in different ways. And you know what this is. This is my cross to bear. And I'm. I'll. I'll carry it. It's on me. You, It's. I gotta put my big boy pants on. Just change the air filter.

[Jared]

Hashtag, no filter.

[Miles]

But again, school system failed me.

[Tyler]

You should have put that in your graduation speech. All this they don't teach you at college.

[Miles]

Yes. Yeah, I should have thrown that in. I should have said just a little side note too, by the way, when you get on the Real World and you buy A house, your entire house is dependent on the air filters.

[Jared]

That's just a fact.

[Miles]

Just a fact. Like I just learned that last week and I just, I just need to get that off my chest because I guarantee no one told you about that. Who knew that dust can just take down your house? It's a silent killer, I guess.

[Tyler]

Can your. Your house is allergic to dust. It needs to be masked up.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And every single time I put a new air filter in, which is not very often, we know I have to be like, okay, am I putting this in the correct way?

[Jared]

Right.

[Miles]

I'm sure I've done that at some point. Just put it in upside down or whatever.

[Jared]

Nightmare.

[Tyler]

I think it still works if you put it in backwards.

[Miles]

Yeah. I don't know.

[Jared]

It seemed a little finicky though.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You think they would just. Also, you think they would just make it double sided go either way.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I think. Don't they have arrows on it and say this side out?

[Miles]

Yeah, well, yeah, yeah, I, I got it in there. Right. Don't throw me a bone here.

[Tyler]

Okay. Not my fault, but we had the power go out last night. Whole neighborhood down. Me and, me and my son were driving. We went over to the farm and as we were driving to the farm, we noticed that the ditch by our house was just on fire. And people do controlled burns. We were like, oh cool, someone's doing a controlled burn of the lake bed. And so then on our way back, there's fire trucks, electrical crews, all sorts of shit parked at this fire, trying to put it out. And we noticed the electrical wire had broken and started that fire. And we were probably the first on the scene. And we just drove right behind. Didn't call it in, but power was out.

[Miles]

Now you guys tell me what's worse, not changing your filter, driving by a crime scene. Because it could have been arson. We don't know.

[Tyler]

It could have been if somebody went up there and snipped the electrical line.

[Miles]

Just saying who's who, who's who's dumber. This was.

[Tyler]

This was no fault of my own problem.

[Miles]

Me neither. I didn't invent H vac and make it all dependent on the air filter. Anyways, Sorry.

[Tyler]

We were without power until like 1 o' clock in the morning. I know because my alarm clock kicked back on and shocked the out of everybody in the house.

[Miles]

You didn't open the fridge, did you?

[Tyler]

No, thank God.

[Miles]

But always my biggest fear is opening the fridge when the power is off and everything just starts melting.

[Tyler]

But my wife was cooking dinner when the power went out, so we had to be like, shit, do we open the fridge and put the ingredients back in the fridge or we just let the shit that's out of the fridge go bad? We did decide to open it quick right away, before it got uncold.

[Jared]

Fire.

[Tyler]

So we were like 45 seconds into the outage when we decided to open the fridge. So I think we're good.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

But it was super weird. Like, I haven't been without power for that long in a long time. Like, we had candles rolling and like, I wake up to pee and it was like, it's pitch black. Like, I. I forgot to grab my phone. I'm slipping up the. Yeah, my piss was black because of the power outage.

[Miles]

Oh, my God.

[Tyler]

I just thought to myself, like, being blind, you're.

[Miles]

You can't see anything.

[Tyler]

It would be the worst.

[Miles]

Yeah, dude. Like, you just every. You just can't see anything.

[Tyler]

Like, I gotta start training myself for if I go blind one day.

[Miles]

Yeah. Like the Three Ninjas.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Remember that movie?

[Tyler]

Yeah. They turn the lights out.

[Miles]

It's a train in the dark.

[Tyler]

That's. That's how they win the final battle. Blow the light.

[Miles]

Shout out to anyone who's ever seen the movie. Three Ninjas. Are their names Colt?

[Tyler]

I don't remember their names.

[Miles]

Like Tom. Tom and one other kid.

[Tyler]

What is it?

[Miles]

I watched that movie a lot with my brothers growing up.

[Tyler]

High Noon at Thunder Mountain or something like that.

[Miles]

Well, that's the other one. There's two there. They made two versions.

[Jared]

Two, Three Ninjas. Couple.

[Miles]

Two.

[Tyler]

Three Ninjas.

[Miles]

It's also like just. It's just three white kids and then their grandpa is just an Asian guy.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Aren't their parents both white too?

[Miles]

Something like that, yeah.

[Jared]

Was the 90s.

[Tyler]

It was. Nothing needed to make sense. They're trying to capitalize on karate.

[Miles]

Yeah. Look at me. Trying to find plot holes in a movie called Three Ninjas. About three kids that take down adults fighting.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Pretty sure there's a scene where the kid just does the splits and just starts punching bad guys in the dick.

[Jared]

Nice.

[Tyler]

Anyways, great movie. That's all I'm judge.

[Miles]

I mean, if you had done your three ninja training, you would have been prepared.

[Tyler]

I know. I'm gonna have to. Well.

[Miles]

And it's a new house, which is a nightmare. You don't know layout like the back of your hand. Because I could navigate my house now pitch black.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Except for the furnace room. I don't know that place very well.

[Tyler]

Clearly I did pretty good. But when you have just tripping over.

[Miles]

Air filters, I get down there.

[Tyler]

What are these things? The.

[Miles]

Is that Dan leaving this around?

[Tyler]

It was.

[Miles]

It.

[Tyler]

It wouldn't have been so bad if I didn't have three small kids that leave everywhere.

[Jared]

Oh yeah, Booby traffic.

[Tyler]

Oh my God.

[Miles]

Yeah. Last night I went to take a pee and I, I almost went ass over tea kettle on a thing of bubbles.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Why we have that in our bedroom? I don't know.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Ends up in weird places. My kid threw both our TV remotes down the heat vent the other day.

[Jared]

We.

[Tyler]

We looked.

[Miles]

So what's funny is that won't take your house down. No air filter. Well, yeah, you could, you could throw a jar of peanut butter in the duct. That won't, that won't take your house down. But the air filter being a little too dirty, a little too much dust, it'll take down your whole system.

[Tyler]

This is the first line of defense. But this time, surely, surely your lesson is learned.

[Miles]

It has.

[Jared]

So you haven't found the remotes yet?

[Tyler]

No, we got them. We just looked forever and then finally the three year old fessed up. He's like, I know where they are. I was like, just show me. And he walked over and he just pointed to the heat vent and I was like, you've gotta be kidding me. My arm's too big to reach down there. So I had to recruit the five year old to stick his arm down there and grab him. And he was having a fit about that. He's like, there's something's gonna grab me. There's nothing down there except the remotes. I promise.

[Miles]

Now you regret telling him all the stories about the monsters because he thought it was funny.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And then when you need it, when you need a most, he just, just folds because of all the work you did?

[Tyler]

No, he eventually, he eventually stepped up and did it. I'm like, well, you're brave.

[Jared]

I changed the air filter. There's no more monsters in there.

[Tyler]

Yeah, don't worry, dad. Dad changed the air filters. All the dust monsters are gone.

[Miles]

That's gonna be one of my kids first lessons. As soon as he becomes conscious and can understand things, you know, it's like, oh, go do some work with dad in the garage. You're like, no, no, we're going to the furnace room. You gotta learn this young. I'm gonna save you hundreds of dollars in your future.

[Tyler]

Well, it's perfect. Make it his job. So one life lesson he'll never forget. And you're good till he's 18.

[Miles]

Have you ever met a kid? Since when did kids are even worse than me at remembering to do things.

[Tyler]

I don't know.

[Jared]

I'm gonna remember that.

[Miles]

I remember you said that my kid.

[Tyler]

Remembers to feed the dog every day at suppertime.

[Miles]

It okay. If I had a dog, I would see it.

[Tyler]

I don't know. Air filters are kind of like the food of the house. Without it, they can't survive.

[Jared]

Oh yeah, food of the house.

[Miles]

Sorry, I'm too busy trying to keep this company afloat so. So you guys can feed your families. And I forgot the air filter slipped my mind amidst that pressure.

[Tyler]

That's Miles's favorite go to when he's in a corner.

[Jared]

Exactly.

[Tyler]

Sorry. I was trying to keep this company afloat.

[Jared]

It's the ultimate card.

[Tyler]

Yep.

[Miles]

The problem is, is like, this is just totally a me issue with the H vac because I've never heard anyone else have these issues.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I. I don't know either. I think grandpa told me that a lot of his stuff when he first moved into the house was just wait until something broke and realize why it broke and then never do it again. So maybe it's just natural progression.

[Miles]

Yeah. Yeah, maybe it's one of those things that, you know, people like it happens to them, but they're so embarrassed they just don't tell anyone.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Kudos to me for just open and honest speaking my truth.

[Tyler]

Thanks for being vulnerable with us talking without a filter.

[Jared]

I like it.

[Tyler]

We should maybe change the name of the podcast. Maybe we should be unfiltered.

[Miles]

I would love for. For filters to be eradicated.

[Tyler]

Miles versus filters 2025.

[Jared]

It's a big task.

[Tyler]

That's his next year's New Year's resolution is to take down big filter.

[Miles]

Just. We've got to figure that out. We can launch a rocket, go to space and come back and we can catch it with chopsticks, but we can't figure out a filterless H vac system.

[Jared]

But I'm sure that rocket has filters though too.

[Tyler]

Probably keep the dust out of it.

[Miles]

Just what if they don't change the filter? The whole rocket's going to explode. It's the way it seems.

[Tyler]

What if they are just running like a normal ass filter in there too, right?

[Jared]

Yeah, it's like a little oil filter.

[Miles]

But that's like. Okay, when you bought your house, Jared, did the realtor give you any information about the house? Terms of little things about it that you need to do?

[Jared]

Not really, but the inspector.

[Tyler]

Yeah, that's what the inspector does.

[Miles]

What happens when you build a new house and there's no exp. Inspector, do you not have to have.

[Tyler]

Like someone check it out?

[Miles]

No, I think. I feel like. I don't know.

[Tyler]

I. I bet you don't.

[Miles]

I either that or like the home builder just has the inspector go through and just talks to them, you know, I mean, right.

[Jared]

It's all like new too. So.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah, there is an inspector that has to go, I'm sure come out. But. Yeah, but good to know it wasn't a. I mean, good to know it wasn't worse that it was just the air filter.

[Tyler]

I mean, also too perspective to defend you a little bit. This guy could be pulling it out of his ass too. H Vac could be pulling a fast one on you because like you said, it is weirdly important. Like a lot of issues seem to be able to happen from the author, but.

[Miles]

So the guy who's done the H Vac here and the guy in my house are two different guys.

[Tyler]

Ah, never mind.

[Miles]

So. Yeah, it's okay.

[Tyler]

I thought he was just coming after you after all the H Vac slander you've got on the Internet.

[Miles]

I've, I've. I told you I rescinded my slander because it's my fault. And the only fault the H Vac people have is making their entire system so dependent on a stupid film.

[Jared]

Don't shoot the messenger.

[Miles]

Yeah, it'll be fine. Never gonna happen again.

[Tyler]

Okay, mark that Jared, clip that. Just have it ready.

[Miles]

So what? How often am I supposed to change it now? Like four every four months?

[Jared]

Three?

[Tyler]

Yeah, I think says three on the filter.

[Miles]

Jesus Christ.

[Jared]

I'm not gonna do that.

[Miles]

That's like four filters a year.

[Tyler]

They're like a dollar fifty.

[Jared]

It takes a minute to do.

[Miles]

Well, mine sticks a little when I'm pulling the tray thing out. So it's longer than you think. Then I got a WD40 in. It's like this whole thing.

[Tyler]

Don't spray that into anything.

[Miles]

Just spraying it up in the thing.

[Tyler]

Yeah. WD40 flammable.

[Jared]

I'm pretty sure.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

It smells like.

[Miles]

You just can't be lubing that much stuff up and not be flammable.

[Tyler]

Yeah, anything compressing in a can is probably flammable.

[Miles]

Yeah, except for just air assault Airsoft. Should we take a break, boys? Yeah, guys, if you got a gas powered engine out there, you need to keep it running like new at every fill up. And so that's why the boys here at YBR use stable in season protection.

[Tyler]

Hell yeah. You can never Be too protected.

[Miles]

I just. Well, yeah, you need a lesson in protection, Tyler.

[Tyler]

I put it in my mower. My weed whacker. But what exactly does it do?

[Miles]

You don't even know what you're.

[Tyler]

I just, I just know it's good for it.

[Miles]

Well, Tyler, I'm glad that you asked because. Stable in outdoor power equipment prevents gum and varnish buildup from forming that could cause a rough or non running engine.

[Tyler]

I like my engines running. Me too, to be honest.

[Miles]

You can also use for cars and trucks, increase fuel efficiency, which getting to the age where fuel efficiency is like my top priority.

[Tyler]

Checking gas prices all the time and.

[Miles]

Just like how many mpgs am I getting? It also can help remove deposits, ensuring long term engine health.

[Tyler]

I gotta get some of that in Gordy in my old pickup.

[Miles]

Yeah, you do.

[Tyler]

That's, that's, that's the next that Actually.

[Miles]

You do need to get some.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I was, I will.

[Miles]

Guys, stable outperforms the competition in independent lab testing. So grab some in season protection today. Test it out for yourself at every fill up. Start with a stable. Stable's kind of like, you know, a few beers for your old man. The old man just gets. Everything run smoothly.

[Tyler]

Hell yeah.

[Miles]

Well, guys, I gave my commencement speech. I did it.

[Tyler]

I, I thought you did pretty well. I, I, I watched the first one because you did two that day, right?

[Miles]

Yeah, I thought it went well too. I actually for someone that can be pretty long winded, I felt like I g, I had the right amount of time too. I was really worried about being a guy who goes on for too long.

[Tyler]

No, I thought it was perfect.

[Miles]

So that went good. Almost all of the jokes hit, which when you're the guy who does comedy online, if you show up and your jokes don't hit. That's tough sled. Yeah, that was like the only thing I was nervous about was like, are, are these gonna be funny enough?

[Tyler]

The, the, my favorite joke of the whole speech didn't hit. And I was like, what the fuck crowd?

[Miles]

Yeah, because you know, ball.

[Tyler]

Yeah, it was the whole thing. Like you, you said that when you played football at msu, you knew the other teams were scared of you because when you lined up, they all ran to the other side and said it was going there. Which is, which is a great joke. And it was crickets.

[Miles]

You, you butchered the joke, Tyler.

[Tyler]

But I got the gist of it.

[Miles]

For those that are confused what's talking about, it was when I line up on the right side, they would all yell, it's going left and run away from me. So, you know, they're terrified.

[Tyler]

Yep.

[Miles]

And then the follow up joke was, no, they let me touch the ball once in a while. I'd say, miles, when your teammate makes a big play, run and grab the ball and hand it to the ref so you can. We can run another play really quick.

[Tyler]

I see. And I thought those were good jokes.

[Miles]

Yeah, I did. Really hit. It's just also the first. It might have played. So first ceremony was a lot of, like, art majors, which they didn't tell me was gonna be there. And then that I changed the joke to something else for the second one. And then as the students are walking in construction management, there's dudes that. There was people wearing hard hats instead of caps with, like the MSUM logo on it. And I was like, maybe I should keep the joke in. But I did a different joke. It hit way better. So wasn't that that upset? Yeah, I was like, okay, let's go. This is my squad here. They're gonna get it. But yeah, it went good. Long day.

[Tyler]

I'm sure.

[Miles]

Got there at 8:30 and left at 4:30. Because you had to give two speeches.

[Tyler]

Did you have to wear the robe the entire day?

[Miles]

No, no, no.

[Tyler]

Okay. They let you take it off between takes.

[Miles]

Yeah. Kind of funny because they were. I had to wear red with, like, a white sash, which is what all of the graduates are wearing. You'd think that if you're the commencement speaker, they'd give you, like, at least one extra thing to identify that you're not a graduate.

[Tyler]

You know, somebody doesn't believe that you're the speaker, they're like, get in line.

[Miles]

You know, like, I watched Charlie Barron's one and he had like, the whole garb.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And then I show up, and it was the exact thing I had to wear for my high school graduation.

[Jared]

Like tablecloth.

[Miles]

Yeah. Like, I could have just wore that.

[Tyler]

You should have brought the extension cord.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Should have done that bit.

[Jared]

Should have.

[Miles]

I know. Did a bungee cord joke instead. I should have pulled out a bungee cord.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

When does it get weird? Like, how do I say this? Like, what? What? At what point in time is it too long to wear the robe? So, like, how long can you keep the robe on until it gets weird?

[Miles]

Like, in that. Like, if I had kept wearing it.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

At what point is it weird?

[Miles]

Like, if I would have gone to dinner with it. Yeah. It also depends on how you're wearing it. Right. Like after the thing, if you unzip it and you like are letting it flow. I think you can buy more time because it's like, clearly he's let his hair down. It's like at a wedding when you untuck your shirt and loosen your tie. You can wear that the whole night. You go to the bar after. It's not weird if you're wearing the full suit. Everyone's kind of like, really? You got. Same thing.

[Tyler]

I think if graduates are wearing their gown anywhere other than the ceremony and in the parking lot taking pictures, it's crazy. Regardless of how loose they let it.

[Miles]

Like. Like, if you wear it on your drive home, fine. And if you get home and you want to take some photos, fine. But after that, I think it's gotta pop. Yeah.

[Tyler]

You can't. You can't wear it for the after party.

[Miles]

Unless you, like, threw a college party, Like a last final party where everyone wore their cap and gown. That would be fun.

[Tyler]

It's the dress code. Yeah. Okay.

[Miles]

That's actually. It would be kind of fun.

[Jared]

Cap and gown party.

[Miles]

We should do that. Everyone just dig out if you still got it. If you don't buy one off Amazon.

[Tyler]

I think I got my high school one somewhere.

[Miles]

Somewhere.

[Tyler]

Yeah. I have a really nice storage room at my house, so it's probably in my storage room that's super nice and big.

[Jared]

This is gonna look great. My storage room.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I have the perfect spot for this. No, it was f. It was fine. It was. I'm glad that I elected to wear it. I. I felt like it added to the experience.

[Tyler]

Where did they give you the option not to?

[Miles]

Yeah, I don't think you had to. I knew someone who gave1@msm before, and they said they didn't wear it, but, yeah, you know, it's kind of fun.

[Tyler]

I did think it was kind of interesting that Charlie Barrons was here last week. He knew full well that you're going to be giving this speech on Friday, and he decided that he's going to start posting clips of his commencement speech eerily close to the time yours was coming out.

[Miles]

You know how Charlie's brain works. He forgot that he gave the commencement speech until I told him I was giving commencements. He's like, oh, actually, I got a clip of that. I should post that. That's how it went.

[Tyler]

It wasn't.

[Miles]

There was no devious.

[Tyler]

There was no ill will from Charlie.

[Miles]

Correct. Yeah. It was just like, oh, yeah, I forgot I got those videos. We should post one of those.

[Tyler]

I thought he was suffering from a case of extreme commencement envy.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean, he did it. MCM's great. But he did give his at University of Wisconsin, so.

[Tyler]

They're not the Dragons. Dude, that place is special.

[Miles]

Yeah, it was. I can't tell you though, like, I'm trying to think of an equivalent feeling after I got done with the second speech, but like I said, like, sit through the rest of the ceremony, but you're mentally just so checked out. It's like the best feeling. I don't know what the. The equivalent is, but it's kind of like it's. I think it's just anytime you give a speech, like, even in school, it was kind of nice being the first one to give a speech in a class. Then you can just relax the rest of the class. But if you're the last one, you' thinking about it the whole time.

[Tyler]

If you're first, you don't absorb a single word of anyone else's speech.

[Miles]

Not a chance.

[Tyler]

You just recapping what you said in your head over and over.

[Miles]

And I tried not to do that. I tried not to, like, mull over how it went because I'm like, I just can't do anything about it. Plus, who gave. Who gave the commencement speech at yours?

[Tyler]

No.

[Miles]

What did they say?

[Jared]

Blacked out.

[Miles]

Exactly.

[Tyler]

So I have a bone to pick with. When I went to msum, we ran a tight ship on our broadcasting classes. You, whoever, the. The audio guy is running the. The dragon stuff right now. You gotta step up. My guy. There was a four second delay. You would say a joke, I'd see your hands come up and whatever. And then I'd have to sit and wait four seconds before the punchline came. So I'm. I'm calling them out. We can do better.

[Miles]

I know the guy who runs the show, so I'll have to text him and say that you said that. They're. They need to tighten up.

[Tyler]

I mean, I don't know if it's the same guy, but when I was there, it was Webby. Webby, you're better than that, man. Yeah, the crew's better than that.

[Miles]

All right, well, let them know.

[Tyler]

No.

[Miles]

Between the ceremonies, I had to go to a luncheon and. And wanted to bring our kid to the second one because he was napping during the first one. So I was like, well, just come eat lunch and then we can go and do it afterwards. So we show up with him, he's like, eat some food. And then Anne was like, oh, I'm gonna go. Like, just. He's kind of getting a little crank. I'm gonna Walk around. Two minutes later, I get a phone call. We have a complete blowout here. I accidentally got. Got on the second diaper. So I need you to run to the car. And as she calls me, the president of the university stands up and starts talking. So then I have to, like, go out during all. Run to the car in the rain, grab some diapers, the whole thing. Then I go back in, and then he was. He had finished talking, and then he's like, oh, Miles is back. We went around the room and introduced ourselves, and I was like, hi. I just had to run to the car for diapers. I, you know, blew. My kid had a blowout. And, like, everyone's just kind of like, really himself. It was like, this seems a little like TMI for a. A luncheon with the president of the university.

[Tyler]

At least one person at the lunch and was like, he's talking about himself.

[Miles]

Yeah, he.

[Tyler]

His pants.

[Miles]

And after I, like, did the intro, whatever. And then the president just goes, yep, you know, thank you, Miles. He's that smiles. He is one of our more shy alumni. It's like, so I shared that a kid had a blowout. It's fine.

[Tyler]

It's life, dude.

[Miles]

It's life. So, yeah, it was good. But now I'm like, thinking, like, did I just open up a can of worms? Might even have to give a commencement speech every year now. Like, call. Am I just going to be getting calls from colleges, universities?

[Tyler]

They did post a highlight reel.

[Miles]

Yeah, they use the one joke that I cut for the second one.

[Tyler]

Yeah. But because it's a good joke that whoever made that real knows ball.

[Miles]

I think I may have to do a Luke from the Outdoor Boys. I may have to just say, you know, officially right now that I am taking a break for a while from.

[Jared]

Doing at least a year.

[Miles]

At least a year. But I just want everyone to know, if you want me to do a commencement speech, you're getting the exact. I'm not writing another one. So you're just getting exactly what I said at that one.

[Tyler]

Hey. And you said that no one ever remembers the commencement speech, so you can give it every year.

[Miles]

Yeah, I'll just alter some of the jokes. Instead of saying I graduated here, I'll just say where I graduated from. Easy.

[Jared]

Still dragon themed.

[Tyler]

Also, of course, red roach.

[Miles]

Huge confusion by people. So you know how I told you guys the story that I graduated, technically graduated in 2016, but I walked for graduation in 2015 because I failed that class and the whole thing? Well, in my speech, I said that I graduated in 2015. But on the screen it said class of 2016. This whole thing. So like they were right. I did graduate 2016.

[Jared]

It's like they fact checked you.

[Tyler]

Yeah, they pop it up right after he says it. They put an asterisk next to it.

[Jared]

It's like pop up videos.

[Miles]

Jared, you were telling me that you have. You want to talk about your haircut?

[Jared]

Yeah, I got a haircut for the first time since my wedding.

[Tyler]

It looks good.

[Miles]

And your wedding remind me exactly when it was.

[Jared]

September 20, 2025.

[Tyler]

Good, good. You remembered. That was a test.

[Jared]

Yeah, you said exactly.

[Miles]

So 2024. Yeah.

[Jared]

Anyway, that's the one year anniversary. That's what I was saying.

[Miles]

Okay, so you got a haircut.

[Jared]

And one thing I realized about myself when I get a haircut is the only. It's the only time I lie a lot. Like I. I don't tell people what I do. I don't.

[Miles]

Yeah. So. Yeah, because you don't have the same person every time. You're like going to sport clips or something.

[Jared]

Essentially. Yeah.

[Miles]

So it's like, so if I was like, oh, hey, like, so what do you do? What do you. What's your response?

[Jared]

Oh, I do video stuff.

[Tyler]

I'd same dude it work with, edit.

[Jared]

Videos or video editing.

[Tyler]

If the person that is asking me that question, that means like, like nothing to me. Like, if they're just a random person I'll never see again, I'd never tell them the truth.

[Miles]

What else do you lie about?

[Jared]

Well, then they'll say like, oh, do you work? Who do you work for? I'm like, oh, I'm just a freelance videographer. Because I don't want to say, you betcha. Because they're just gonna ask about you, Miles. And every time I tell somebody what I do, they just want to talk about you.

[Miles]

Yeah. And you're like, I want to leave work. At work.

[Tyler]

They always ask questions like, you guys make money doing that, huh? Every time.

[Miles]

So did I tell you about what my grandma said? So remember when we had. We surpassed a billion views on Facebook? My mom was telling my grandma's like, yeah, Miles, they got a billion views on Facebook. And she goes, oh, gosh. So like, is that like a dollar per view? My grandma thought I was a billionaire.

[Tyler]

Hell yeah.

[Miles]

For about 15 seconds she thought that she had a grandson who's a billionaire.

[Tyler]

That would be pretty sweet.

[Miles]

That would be sick. Dollar per view would be awesome.

[Tyler]

We could have Luke from the Outdoor Boys dibs out a long time, long time ago.

[Miles]

We would all be Retired.

[Tyler]

Yep.

[Miles]

But so, yeah, you're just. You're.

[Jared]

So.

[Miles]

You're kind of the opposite. I feel like sometimes people, when they get their haircut, they'll spill their guts on stuff.

[Tyler]

No, I'm with Jared.

[Jared]

I don't like to talk. I mean, if you want to talk to me, that's fine. I'm just gonna lie to you.

[Miles]

What else do you lie about? Mostly just work.

[Jared]

Just work? Yeah.

[Tyler]

Do you ever come up with any, like, fun stories? Because I feel like it'd be a time where you could test out a new identity.

[Jared]

I feel like that's gonna bite me in the ass down the road. So that's why I don't mess with that.

[Tyler]

What's your name? Oh, Jared with an A.

[Jared]

There was one time with my old Chevy Cruze. I had to get it fixed. I didn't care about it anymore. So I, like, left it at the auto body shop for, like, I don't know, two, three months. They kept calling me. I kept, like, declining it because I didn't want to pick it up. I already had a new car at this point. One day I decided to go pick it up. He's like, we. And he's like, you're Jared. We've been trying so hard to reach you. Where have you been? I didn't think you'd make a big deal out of it. And I'm like, yeah, I was in. I was in Europe for about a month. That's why I haven't came back. And I don't know if he bought it or not. He's like, oh, really? Completely didn't know what to say.

[Tyler]

Did he ask any more questions or did you just leave it?

[Jared]

He just kind of left it.

[Tyler]

That's good.

[Miles]

Also, though, that is the most miles move you've ever pulled, just leaving a car at the auto body shop because you just don't want to deal with it.

[Jared]

Right. Wow, I really kicked the can down the road on that one.

[Tyler]

Out of sight, out of mind.

[Miles]

I bet you became famous at the auto body shop, though. They're like, we've never had anyone drop off a car and not pick it up.

[Jared]

If I thought I was dead.

[Tyler]

Yeah, Jared, the Chevy Cruise guy.

[Jared]

Oh, the cruise got picked up today. He's gone. You said he was in Europe.

[Miles]

That's the best excuse you had was, I was in Europe.

[Jared]

What else am I supposed to say?

[Miles]

Well, just be like, I didn't have a car. I couldn't get here, and all my buddies were in Europe for a month.

[Tyler]

Every single one of them.

[Miles]

And then I puked in the Uber too many times. Like canceled my account.

[Jared]

Oh, you had a three star rating.

[Tyler]

I had a, I had a buddy in college who just didn't go to class for like two months and he lived at the dorms and then he emailed his professors saying that he got in a car accident and they're like, okay, cool, well if you just come to class and take the test and whatever, we'll give you an incomplete so you don't fail these classes and flunk out of school. And he's like, well, I gotta make it look like I was in a car accident. So he went to another one of the football players and got like one of those crazy like floating. Basically a knee brace deal. But for your whole arm.

[Miles]

Yeah, an elbow brace.

[Tyler]

Yeah, an elbow brace. But was like the big like liquid gel ones that are like liquid cast deal. Air cast deals.

[Miles]

Oh, so like, like a, the, like a something you would ice your arm for.

[Tyler]

I. I don't know.

[Jared]

Fancy brace.

[Tyler]

It was super, super fancy brace. It was called the air cast and it had like the sling. So he had to go take his final left handed for an incomplete. For incomplete for every single class.

[Miles]

Oh, that was because he was just.

[Tyler]

He was just getting canned in the dorms and not going to school. And it was like out of it by saying, I was in a car accident.

[Jared]

What an idiot.

[Tyler]

So he had to follow through on that lie.

[Miles]

So basically he just paid for those.

[Tyler]

Classes and then just didn't. He got credit for doing them. But it didn't affect his like GPA because that's what the incompletes got him.

[Jared]

That's a kick to the nut.

[Miles]

Yeah, that sucks.

[Jared]

Learned his.

[Miles]

But also he. It is so easy to pass college.

[Tyler]

Just go.

[Miles]

If you just show up and you do the discussion boards and you just don't do really bad on the test. You'll just pass college.

[Tyler]

Yeah, as long as it's a, a really easy class, not a hard one like sport and play.

[Miles]

Sport and play. But again, if I had just done two more assignments, it have been good, right?

[Jared]

It trying to thread the needle.

[Miles]

Yeah. Do you guys. Because it's like no one's putting their grades on a resume. You just say that you got the degree. Yeah. So that's all I gotta do.

[Tyler]

C's get degrees, D's get degrees.

[Miles]

Tyler, the only problem was you had to keep us above a certain GPA to like be eligible for sports and play.

[Jared]

I didn't have that problem.

[Miles]

Actually, you know what, Jared? I'd like to see your transcript. As your employer.

[Jared]

I just quit.

[Miles]

Yeah. And then like, Jared, why haven't you shown up to work? You're like, I'm in Europe.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

No, studying abroad.

[Miles]

Studying abroad.

[Tyler]

Jared just doesn't come back for three months. Like, where the. Is he?

[Miles]

What are all these F's on your. Oh, no. So that was when I was studying abroad. And F in Europe actually means phenomenal.

[Tyler]

It's French for phenomenal.

[Jared]

Yeah. I can read my transcript. I wouldn't go through.

[Miles]

Should.

[Jared]

Yeah. See if I have a job by the end.

[Miles]

All right. You got a fun fact, Jared?

[Jared]

I do. Just one quick one. Let me find it.

[Tyler]

It's in Europe.

[Jared]

It's in your. Where is it?

[Miles]

Just had it.

[Jared]

Oh. The dash lines on a Highway are 10ft long.

[Tyler]

What?

[Jared]

It's like when you're driving on the interstate, the lines in the middle are 10ft long. Each.

[Miles]

Yeah. Wow.

[Tyler]

It sure don't feel like it.

[Jared]

They feel like three feet.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah. Like, if I had to do with my arms how long the stripes are. They're like this long.

[Jared]

Right.

[Miles]

Which. That is probably 67. Yeah. This is probably like five feet.

[Tyler]

See, even right now, I feel like that's too big.

[Miles]

You think they're like this?

[Tyler]

Yeah. May. Between where you had there and that. As I would guess they're probably like this.

[Miles]

So about four feet.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Great. Great for audio people.

[Miles]

I mean. Yeah. I mean, I would have guessed eight at the max.

[Tyler]

I. Now I'm going to be driving down the highway and only thinking about this and looking at the lines. Getting an accident. So thanks for that, Jared.

[Jared]

Stay between them.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean, when you're going that fast, because it's like. Have you ever seen when they write stuff on the road and then they elongate it really long? So, like, if you're just standing there, it's hard to read, but when you're going fast and driving over it, it's easy to read. So I imagine lines appear shorter because you're driving. Right.

[Jared]

It's like a road sign, too. You think road signs are small, but then you, like, if you're like holding one, you're like, this is pretty damn big.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

So there's that illusion.

[Tyler]

On those. The letters on the road where it says stop ahead. Is it supposed to read ahead, stop, or stop ahead? Are you supposed to read the bottom word first or the top word? First, First.

[Miles]

So I. I know you're saying. Because I've thought the same thing. I think they're doing it. So you read stop Ahead. But it should say stop ahead.

[Tyler]

No, because the stop is on the bottom. The stop is on the bottom. So if you're reading it normal, like a book, top to bottom, it says a head stop should be had to.

[Jared]

Cut him a stop.

[Miles]

Oh, so it is the way I said it.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah, that makes sense. But you're right that you are. It is weird at first.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Because it's. If you're reading it like a normal, like, paragraph, you go top to bottom. So it would say ahead stop if you read it in that order. But as you're driving, you see the stop first. So is it stop ahead or do they perfectly purposely pick that phrase so you can read it both ways and it means the same thing?

[Miles]

Or maybe they do it so you pay attention to the stop because you're like, oh, you actually read it.

[Tyler]

Now I'm so focused on the text, I'm going to blow this stop sign.

[Miles]

Don't do that.

[Jared]

Don't blow that thing.

[Miles]

Yeah, I think it's stop ahead.

[Tyler]

Because if it said stop sign coming up, how would they put it on?

[Miles]

Because it would be. If they were going to do a head stop, they'd have to go ahead comma. There'd be a comma there.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Yeah. Taxpayer dollars wasted on commas.

[Miles]

They had to put commas or a period after everything on the road. How much extra money that would cost? So much.

[Tyler]

Every railroad crossing has to write railroad crossing can't just be rrx.

[Jared]

Grammar Nazis.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Well. Is that it, Jared?

[Tyler]

That's it.

[Miles]

Well, guys, thanks for tuning in to another episode of you bet your Radio. Ryan will be back next week.

[Tyler]

I will be gone.

[Miles]

Have a good Memorial Day weekend. You're gonna be gone. All right. Sweet. No, I'm just kidding. Have a good Memorial Day weekend. Right. That's this weekend.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

Yeah. Yeah. See you next one. Love you guys. Cloud in the sky box cash and.

[Tyler]

Check stacked up so high Loops out.

[Miles]

With the boys camping by the stream Outdoor dreams fueling every kid's dream Let the world spin alive let the stories be told from the modern mist to the global bathtails and barber fits they're just part of the game Power line sweat saying but the spirit stays the same. You're a month wandering bag heavy with gear Every cobblestone whispering tal's in your ear Ryan soaking deep luxurious grace hiding the truth with a straight shave face Let the world spin wild let the stories be we to from the modern m to the good old gold bad tails and barber fits they're just part of the Game power line swaying. But the spirit stays the same.

[Jared]

So I looked at, like, the price of. Of, like, everyday things we see. Oh. And like, we have to guess. Yeah, you can guess.

[Tyler]

So what it.

[Jared]

What is the typical price range of an ATM machine?

[Miles]

Like, if you're gonna buy it to buy an atm.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

So I'm pretty sure I saw this in some finance bro TikTok. You should just go out and buy an ATM machine and you'll make this much passive money. So I think it's like three grand.

[Miles]

I was gonna say eighteen hundred bucks.

[Jared]

The. Between two thousand and eight thousand dollars for an ATM machine.

[Miles]

Okay. All right. Yeah. Because it's. Because you basically, like, will split the ATM fee with the place you put it in.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Correct.

[Tyler]

Yep. So, like, yeah, if you put. At the gas station, you charge four bucks. They get two, you get two.

[Miles]

Yep.

[Jared]

What about a Coke freestyle machine?

[Tyler]

I don't.

[Miles]

Oh, though. God, I hate those.

[Tyler]

What is it?

[Miles]

I hate them so much. The buttons never work.

[Tyler]

Oh, the. Like, where you get the. A Coke machine, you can put, like, vanilla syrup in anything.

[Miles]

If I'm at one of those, it's just like this. And you just have to keep pressing it over and over again, and then it finally goes through. It's just the worst software, worst interface ever. I hate it. Who needs a. A. A cherry orange vanilla Coke?

[Tyler]

That sounds good.

[Miles]

Just give me a Diet Coke or.

[Jared]

Like a cherry vanilla, like, diet barks, root beer.

[Miles]

And then the line's long because everyone's rifling through.

[Jared]

If you get a boomer up there, it's game over.

[Miles]

And then you click into the wrong one, and then, like, the back button doesn't work and you're just hammering it. I hate those things.

[Tyler]

I mean, they would be.

[Miles]

And the sad part is they're probably like 15 grand.

[Tyler]

All their problems would be fixed if they just made it regular button. I think people would love those machines. If it wasn't touch screen. You'd love those. I would love them even more. I still like them.

[Miles]

I still think they'd be dumb, but they'd be better for sure.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

It's between 5,000 and $15,000. What about a Police Taser?

[Miles]

I bet you can get one of those for, like, probably like 280 bucks.

[Tyler]

I don't. I feel higher. I think I'm gonna go like 400, 500 bucks.

[Jared]

1300 bucks.

[Tyler]

Holy.

[Miles]

Yeah. Police grade.

[Jared]

Yeah, Police.

[Miles]

You bought one off of Amazon. I bet it's not that much.

[Tyler]

No, I. There's a Dylan. I went to school with that. Brought his taser to school and we'd tase each other in shop class.

[Miles]

How much was his.

[Tyler]

Yeah, he's like $30 from. From us. Like a circus tent type of dangerous. Yeah.

[Jared]

How much is a gallon of printer ink for the average consumer printer gallon? A gallon.

[Miles]

How many. How many liters is a gallon? Just so I for reference, you know.

[Jared]

Let me look it up quick.

[Miles]

Yeah, liters. Then I will convert it back to gallons and then count 2.3.7. That doesn't help me at all, I think. I mean, a gallon of ink is a lot because a little cartridge, that's got to be what, 2 ounces?

[Tyler]

I have no idea.

[Jared]

And those are typically around 30 bucks. 50 bucks.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean, you're buying in bulk, but who's buying a gallon of things?

[Tyler]

Yeah. And if you bought a gallon, does it come in a gallon jug that you gotta dump in a cartridge?

[Jared]

I just looked it up.

[Miles]

I mean, it's. I mean, if you put it that like, if you start thinking it's kind of liquid gold, especially the yellow color.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

This is a. It's a lot of money for ink.

[Tyler]

Forget oil. I hope I strike ink.

[Jared]

Got ink on your property?

[Miles]

I'm gonna go a thousand bucks, Tyler.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I would go like $400.

[Jared]

1500 bucks around.

[Tyler]

Hey, dude, that's crazy.

[Miles]

It's liquid gold.

[Jared]

How much is a basketball sticky mat?

[Miles]

The tear off ones. I bet $120.

[Tyler]

I was gonna say 150 around 50 bucks, huh?

[Miles]

Why the don't we have one, right?

[Tyler]

Why don't all teams have them? Because I remember like some high school teams didn't have the sticky map.

[Miles]

I would like to know how many sticks you get. Like how many times you can rip it off till you get a new one.

[Jared]

I bet it's like a hundred.

[Miles]

I bet even more than that, don't you think?

[Tyler]

How many. How many rips do you get to the center of a sticky mat?

[Miles]

I bet it's like 500.

[Tyler]

Google it.

[Jared]

How much would 10,000 toothpicks cost?

[Miles]

$400.

[Jared]

I had like a hundred bucks around 18.

[Tyler]

What?

[Jared]

For 10,000 toothpicks?

[Tyler]

Okay. Because I just.

[Miles]

I just was basing it off of like how much a pack of toothpicks cost. Yeah, I guess for. At cost.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Because what do you pay, like two dollars for a hundred?

[Miles]

Yeah, dude, toothpick companies are killing it. The margin.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

There's a hundred in a pack. That's what you could sell a thousand of them for 2 bucks a pop. That's $2,000 for 18 for 18 of. I mean, you have packaging as well.

[Tyler]

But it's not like it's gonna cost you a lot to ship them.

[Miles]

What a margin.

[Tyler]

We gotta start selling toothpicks, guys, if.

[Miles]

You want more, you bet your radio. You gotta check out our Patreon. You gotta go to patreon.com you betch radio, or look us up on the app. And we have hundreds of hours of other episodes on there that you can't get unless you're signed up. So you got to check us out on Patreon. You bet your radio, baby.