The Best First Day on the Job Advice 🎙 #390

Summary

You Betcha Radio #390: The Best First Day on the Job Advice 🎙

Overview

In this classic "You Betcha" episode, Myles, Ryan, Tyler, and Jared deliver a quintessentially Midwest take on manly weekend projects, summer nostalgia, Midwest kitchen confusion, and—most importantly—the ultimate comedy-laden, deliberately terrible (and occasionally sound) advice for your first day on the job. The crew also embarks on a hilarious fast food menu draft, debates over the best drive-thru, and ends with a deep-dive into conquering the infamous “999 Challenge”—all wrapped up in classic Midwest sarcasm and camaraderie.

---

Episode Breakdown

1. Weekend Recaps: Concrete, Festivals & Kitchen Disasters

[00:01–28:59]

• Midwest Concrete Chronicles
  Myles shares his weekends spent doing concrete work for his in-laws, which spirals from a “one weekend” stamped patio job into multiple weekends involving retaining walls and old crew reunions.

  • Myles: “Felt good to be back.” [02:08]
  • Nostalgic banter on working with dads and in-laws, and classic discussions about who sits around sipping beers during a project.

• Kids’ Concrete Handprints & Family Projects
  The group reminisces about handprint cement projects for grandmas.

  • Ryan: “If any of my grandchildren put their hands in this slab, they’re immediately going to be my least favorite grandchildren.” [05:19]

• We Fest Tales
  Tyler attended We Fest (MN country music festival), channeling his inner karaoke DJ and recounting the mayhem (or remarkable lack of fights) this time.

  • Tyler: “My first ever time buying concert merch... I really like Brooks & Dunn.” [10:09]
  • Discussions about country music, festival fights, and classic Brooks & Dunn impressions.

• Kitchen and Pantry Organization (or Chaos)
  The crew launches into passionate gripes about finding anything in their home kitchens, debating Midwest kitchen layout logic.

  • Myles: “Nothing is where it should be in our kitchen. At the lake, the lake’s the worst... cups in the pantry. It’s a disaster.” [24:27]
  • Tyler: “Thank God the silverware drawer hasn’t changed. Otherwise I’d be lost.” [26:22]

---

2. Culinary Adventures

[16:59–29:03]

• Jared’s Cooking Escapades
  Jared flexes newfound cooking skills, conquering French “Coq au Vin” thanks to YouTube Shorts—but the guys mercilessly roast the pronunciation and concept.
  • “Bacon chicken while I’m whining.” – Myles, riffing on Jared’s confusion between bacon, chicken, and wine [19:02]
  • The difficulty of ingredient hunting and kitchen spatial awareness.

---

3. Main Topic: Best (Worst) First Day on the Job Advice

[30:29–47:44]

Key Satirical ‘Do’s and Don’ts’ (with timestamps and quotes):

• Set Boundaries (aka, Be a Slacker Early)

  • “Set the bar low on your first day so that you can always… improve.” – Myles [31:03]
  • “Leave at 4:45. Show up at 8:58 for a 9 o’clock job. Next day, stay until 4:46 and people will be amazed.” [31:08]

• Announce Your Productivity

  • “Just start by announcing all the work you’re doing. ‘Spreadsheets: done.’” – Myles [32:37]

• Make It Hyper-Competitive (‘Show Off Your Resume’)

  • “Run everywhere. Start talking shit. Reference the handbook constantly.” – Miles [32:59]

• Push the Office Culture

  • “Show up a little hungover. Let your coworkers know you’re there to party.” – Tyler [34:07]
  • “If you want to be the office prankster, show up rock hard. If people get uncomfortable, just say, ‘I just haven’t knocked off my morning wood yet—this happens a lot.’” – Myles [34:58], wildly pushing the satirical boundaries.

• HR Expert Moves

  • Record every one-on-one meeting “for training purposes” with Meta glasses, “close the door, hit the record button, and make sure they know.” [42:24]

• Don’ts

  • “Don’t have a firm handshake. Limp wrist everybody.” – Jared [43:51]
  • “Don’t set the bar high. You want to win Most Improved at the Christmas party—you can’t do that if you start strong.” – Miles [44:22]

• Advanced Sabotage

  • “Hinder other people's progress to make sure you get Most Improved. Mess up their spreadsheets.” – Tyler [45:56]

Most Absurd Suggestions (intentionally bad):

• Pull the fire alarm “to see how well the company knows their fire drill.” [36:05]
• “Call in a bomb threat... so you can hand out your sales card to everyone in the parking lot.” [36:35]
• Sell raffle tickets for a gun on your first day and “prove it works” with a “desk pop.” [38:00]
• Ask every co-worker for a bite of their lunch to get to know them. [39:26]
• Do Duolingo lessons out loud in the break room “to show you’re always learning and ready to expand into international markets.” [40:06]

“First day is all about setting the tone.” – Myles [35:59]

---

4. Fast Food Menu Item Draft

[49:39–73:10]

The gang holds a raucous “fantasy draft” of fast food menu items, with ongoing arguments about what counts as fast food (drive-thru required, can’t build by ingredient, etc.), culminating in an eclectic, hunger-inducing list.

Key Picks by the Crew:

• Myles: McDonald’s Diet Coke, Spicy Chick-fil-A Sandwich, Cheesy Gordita Crunch, McDonald’s Sausage Egg McMuffin Meal, Crumbl Cookie. [55:32, 59:03, 69:45]
• Ryan: Taco John’s Potato Olés, Crunchwrap Supreme, Culver’s Concrete Mixer, A&W Cream Soda. [57:16, 61:20, 66:38]
• Tyler: McDonald’s Fries, Culver’s Root Beer, Dairy Queen Chicken Strip Basket, Taco Bell Cinnabon Delights. [57:49, 62:14, 64:37]
• Jared: Culver’s Double ButterBurger, Five Guys Fries, DQ Blizzard, Arby’s Curly Fries, Baja Blast. [57:54, 64:14]

Memorable Fast Food Quotes:

• “My mouth’s gonna start watering... for the first pick overall, I’m going to select a McDonald’s Diet Coke.” – Myles [55:32]
• “I could slurp down a cheesy gordita crunch with the best of them.” – Myles [59:52]
• “Would you stick your dick in it?” – Ryan, on Cheesy Gordita Crunch [60:19]

---

5. Midwest News & Oddities

[74:26–80:10]

• Dave Update:
  Dave, old fan favorite, is on “Facebook hiatus” after subtweeting someone he mentored and gets caught by the daughter—a classic Midwest social mishap.
  • “He was running his mouth and got in trouble about it... now he’s off Facebook.” – Myles [74:53]

---

6. Fun Fact & Midwest Perspective

[76:22–79:20]

• Space Is Closer Than You Think
  • “Space is roughly only 62 vertical miles away.” – Tyler [76:30]
  • Group processes how commercial planes only go 6 miles up, but space would just be like driving to Detroit Lakes, but straight up.

---

7. Bonus: The 999 Challenge—Strategy Session

[79:30–87:10]

• Description: Nine hot dogs, nine beers, nine innings at a ball game.
• Strategy Tips:
  • Jared: “Hammer five hot dogs right away. Use the first couple innings. Then, take a break, crush some beers, and finish with a strong stretch run.” [81:15]
  • Ryan: “Do six beers before your first dog so the last three can wash them down.” [85:02]
  • Miles: “Mentally, you need to get food in before your brain tells you that you’re full. Compact your buns!” [83:46]

---

Notable Quotes & Moments

• “Set the bar low on your first day so you can always be improving.” – Myles [31:03]
• “First day is all about setting the tone.” – Myles [35:59]
• “Honestly, set the bar low, improve a little, and distract everyone else so they can't win most improved.” – Myles [46:04]
• “If any of my grandchildren put their hands in this slab, they’re immediately going to be my least favorite grandchildren.” – Ryan’s father-in-law [05:19]
• “I could slurp down a Cheesy Gordita Crunch with the best of them.” – Myles [59:52]
• “Would you stick your dick in it?” – Ryan, on Cheesy Gordita Crunch [60:19]

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

| Time | Segment | |-------------|---------------------------------| | 00:01–10:00 | Midwest projects, concrete tales| | 10:00–16:00 | Country music, kitchen chaos | | 16:59–29:03 | Jared’s cooking escapades | | 30:29–47:44 | First day on the job “advice” | | 49:39–73:10 | Fast food menu item fantasy draft| | 74:26–76:03 | Dave’s Facebook drama | | 76:22–79:20 | Fun fact: Distance to space | | 79:30–87:10 | The 999 Challenge strategy |

---

Tone & Style

• Signature “You Betcha” deadpan humor, deliberately bad advice, and classic Midwest banter
• Layer of tongue-in-cheek satire—don’t take the first-day job advice literally!
• Rich with inside jokes, relatable Midwest gripes, gentle self-deprecation, and a “just one of the guys” camaraderie

---

For New Listeners

If you’ve never heard You Betcha Radio before, this episode embodies their signature approach: every segment is a blend of friendly roast, over-the-top wisdom, and relatable Midwest problems. You’ll leave with a smile, a few questionable strategies, an intense craving for drive-thru, and a reminder not to take your first day too seriously—unless you want to win Most Improved at the office Christmas party.

---

Summary prepared for listeners by Midwest sensibility—skip the handprints in the concrete, but maybe grab a cheesy Gordita Crunch on the way to your first day.

Transcript

[Tyler]

All right, back to it.

[Miles]

Welcome back, everybody, to another episode of the you Bet yout Radio podcast. Boys are in the studio. And guess what, guys?

[Tyler]

What, Miles?

[Miles]

This last weekend I was doing some concrete work back in the saddle. It's actually been the last, like month on the weekends I have been doing concrete work and.

[Tyler]

Are you moonlighting?

[Miles]

I don't know.

[Tyler]

Moonlighting your own company?

[Miles]

Yeah, it's. It's actually been good to get back in the saddle. You know, when we always talked about that, you're sitting at your desk job and you're looking out the window like, God, a couple days working concrete might heal my soul. Yeah, that's actually true. Feeling pretty good after.

[Tyler]

Good.

[Ryan]

Was your dad sitting in his truck?

[Miles]

No, my dad was helping. Basically. We poured a stamped patio for my in laws.

[Ryan]

Nice.

[Miles]

But of course, when we like, yeah, we can do a stand patio, no problem. That's, you know, once we dig it up, when we can set it up and pour it the next day or whatever, it's a one weekend wham, bam, thank you, ma' am job. And then once we got the size of it, we're like, ah, this is too big of a. A grade of a slope. So we'll probably have to put like a retaining wall in here. So then it became digging it up, doing a retaining, concrete retaining wall, stripping that, getting the other things set up, then pouring, you know, and it turned into a multiple week project.

[Tyler]

Are we. Is it a wrap yet?

[Miles]

It's a while. We still got to put some stone on the retaining wall.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Miles]

Which basically just glue some veneer stone to the outside.

[Tyler]

That's a weekend job.

[Ryan]

You can get that.

[Miles]

I mean, I don't technically have to help with that, but feel like I probably should. I kind of got him into the retaining wall mess. But yeah, dude, it's. There was even one of the days I got the old crew that my. My dad's crew, the guys that used to work with we, We. We all work together. No. Felt good to be back.

[Ryan]

Any good jokes flying out?

[Miles]

You wouldn't know them well.

[Ryan]

No, I. Yeah, definitely not.

[Tyler]

But any chest bumping matches with any old rivals?

[Miles]

Oh, God, no. I mean, if you're getting into a chess puppy match doing a stamped patio, this is like a disaster scenario.

[Ryan]

So what kind of job?

[Miles]

Temper's got to be flying if you're getting pissed at a stamp patio. It's the way it's one of the flat work. Like a patio is the easiest concrete job you can have, in my opinion.

[Ryan]

So what kind of job Constitutes chest bumpy match.

[Miles]

Typically it's usually when it's really hot out, very humid, you've been working all day long hours, stuff isn't working.

[Ryan]

You know, all that foundation and stuff.

[Miles]

Yeah, it's just like you get, you get into a hole where you're putting up forms and pouring concrete. There's no wind down there, so you're not even getting a breeze. And there's just a lot more moving parts. And sometimes you're sliding a rod into the ties and it slips and you, she, you clips your finger or something and there's just like anything like that can set you off or someone prematurely does their job before you're done with theirs and it makes you have to redo their.

[Tyler]

That.

[Miles]

Yeah, that'll send them up a wall.

[Ryan]

So will your father in law, will he sit on the, on the stamp patio and watch you put rock up on the retaining?

[Miles]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Ryan]

I would if I was.

[Miles]

He wanted to help, but he just like, he just does, you know, it's very.

[Ryan]

You guys got it.

[Miles]

You wouldn't know what to do if you showed up.

[Jared]

Yeah. Ryan, you wouldn't know what to do.

[Miles]

I'm not saying I've never done it. So it's like you, you want to help, so you kind of just end up walking around and like picking up stuff.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Which like sucks for, you know.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah. No, for sure.

[Miles]

But yeah.

[Jared]

And then you roast your father a lot because he doesn't know what to do.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah. No, my dad, my, my dad did do that. Did I tell you guys that? No, he, after one of the days he was like, hey, next Saturday I'm be at work. I won't be able to be here. My, my dad to my father in law just goes, well, who's going to sit around and watch us? I was like, yeah, who's going to. Or who's going to get us beers?

[Ryan]

Yeah, you need a little bit of that.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

So it's good that your dad and your father in law have rapport though.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

This is actually like a very good thing.

[Jared]

Maybe they don't.

[Miles]

Maybe my dad was being serious. Yeah, maybe it wasn't a jail.

[Tyler]

Maybe. Christmas is going to be real weird. Birthdays are going to be real weird.

[Miles]

But yeah, it's looks pretty good. Not to brag. And I basically have done everything on a stamp patio but stamping it. So I got that new dad skill. I was like, let me get in there. I got to learn how to do the stamping. Stamping's easy.

[Jared]

You said butt stamp. I thought you're just stamp your like your ass into the concrete. Had a brain fart there.

[Miles]

Oh, everything but stamp.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah, he knows everything but stamps.

[Ryan]

Did you, did you ask, did you ask your in laws if they wanted their kids to put their handprints?

[Miles]

I did.

[Ryan]

Nice. Gotta.

[Miles]

You know, my father in law said, he said if, if, if any of my grandchildren put their hands in this slab, they're immediately going to be my least favorite grandchildren. I was like, okay, no hand prints in the slab.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah. He'll probably like. You probably want to take such good care of that, Patty. You might not even sit on it. You might just observe it.

[Miles]

That's not gonna happen to Ryan.

[Ryan]

Okay. I wasn't actually serious.

[Jared]

Yeah, maybe. You never know.

[Tyler]

One year for Mother's day we got all the grandmas just little mini at home concrete circles to do handpr so they can put it wherever the hell they want.

[Ryan]

But they all have it with the jewels on them. They have little jewels.

[Tyler]

Jewel kit came with it. So it was a decorate together situation. None of them have done it.

[Ryan]

My wife, she got those for the same reason and we had fucking. My kid was sticking his hands in there when it was still drying and so then. And then he was like throwing jewels on there and then he was like dropping it and shit. So the jewels all over. It's a. Yeah. Yep.

[Miles]

I did that one time in like kindergarten and I'm pretty sure my mom still has that like displayed in the house.

[Ryan]

Yep. Yeah, we don't actually have a walkway yet. And my. Well, and then my youngest, he. When, when we try to get his hand in there, he would keep curling his fingers into a fist and so checks out. Yeah.

[Tyler]

Yeah, just make them do it when they're 18.

[Ryan]

It sounded good in theory, but then when you actually get down to the nitty gritty, it's not. It's not worth it.

[Tyler]

Okay, good to know.

[Miles]

Good to know. What else would you guys do this weekend?

[Tyler]

I wouldn't. I went we festing.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

How was it?

[Tyler]

It's a good time. It's the first time I've been back in like 10 years.

[Ryan]

I.

[Tyler]

We fested really, really hard in my early 20s.

[Miles]

And I do think of all the people here, Tyler is most primed to be a huge we fest guy.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I. I really liked it. And I went back just because I got lucky with tickets. Like I got some nice ones from my dad and some other people, so otherwise I'd have been we Fest list another year.

[Miles]

But for those of you who don't know, a we fest is just a country festival in. In Minnesota.

[Ryan]

Here.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yep. And it was a really. It was a good lineup. It was Lainey Wilson the first night, then Thomas Rhett, then Brooks and Dunn and there's a bunch of other people below them. But yeah, it was sick. I set up karaoke in the campgrounds.

[Jared]

I thought you're saying up on stage.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I got tons of people to come through to that.

[Ryan]

You didn't camp, did you?

[Tyler]

No, but my dad and his buddies had a campsite. So we went to their campsite and these huge standing speakers, like the speaker from ground to top of speaker is like five feet tall. So dueling speakers.

[Ryan]

Way to do it.

[Tyler]

I had this lady named Amber, we called her Amber Alert because she's always wandering off or getting into other people's. So you would just stand out in the path and pull people in for karaoke.

[Miles]

It's my worst nightmare karaoke to be walking in the path and Tyler comes and grabs me and says I gotta do karaoke.

[Tyler]

I was DJing. Amber alert would have got you.

[Ryan]

She. Yeah, she was. Yeah.

[Miles]

What was the advantage to doing the karaoke we did like, was it a promo deal?

[Tyler]

Everyone just loved it. People were having a good time. You're. It's at a place with 30,000 people and every single one of them is at least buzzed. So random karaoke when you're at least buzzed is a good ass time.

[Jared]

I like it.

[Tyler]

There's people.

[Miles]

It's so. Okay.

[Tyler]

People had a slip and slide.

[Ryan]

You guys know how I feel about karaoke.

[Tyler]

I already got you to do it.

[Ryan]

No, my kid did it the other weekend and now he wants a karaoke machine.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

What did he sing?

[Ryan]

I don't know.

[Miles]

It's ABCs.

[Ryan]

Yeah, he knows the Spider Man. Batman.

[Tyler]

The Batman theme song is easy. Yeah, Batman.

[Ryan]

It's like tequila.

[Tyler]

Tequila. Y.

[Jared]

Yes.

[Ryan]

Yep. I did. I did run across one We Fest fight on social media.

[Jared]

Nice.

[Ryan]

And then after the next five minutes, 10 more we fest fights.

[Tyler]

Really? I didn't see a single one.

[Ryan]

Well, that's what I was going to ask if you saw any of them.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I didn't. I didn't even see a We Fest chess bump in match.

[Miles]

Yeah. What? Were there any like real good fights or.

[Ryan]

No, there was one where it didn't show the meat of the fight where the actual people were fighting. But it was the. It was the police trying to break it all up and like they were

[Tyler]

like People's heads off over the fence.

[Ryan]

Yes.

[Tyler]

Yeah, that was different. Country music festival, but I saw that as well.

[Ryan]

I got duped, though.

[Miles]

And it's probably six years old.

[Ryan]

Probably.

[Tyler]

There is a video that makes.

[Miles]

Oh, no, Ryan.

[Tyler]

But yeah, I saw that one.

[Ryan]

Probably a different fence, one we're talking about. Yeah, I looked at the comments. It was definitely there.

[Tyler]

But anyway, yeah, I brought a. I bought a Brooks and Dunn shirt.

[Miles]

I see that.

[Tyler]

My first ever time buying concert merch.

[Miles]

Was that $60.

[Tyler]

No, it was only 40, which is still too much for this shirt too. I'm a big. I. I really like Brooks and Dunn and so. Only I've seen a lot of really cool acts from when I was on the radio and Brooks and Dunn is one I've never seen and I've always liked them, so I was like, I've got to get some merch.

[Miles]

Well, they still got it.

[Tyler]

They still got it. Ronnie Dunn was having some voice issues, so Brooks sang a little more than he usually does to give Ronnie breaks after a couple songs.

[Miles]

I hate how he talks about him like he's like, they're buddies.

[Tyler]

What do you want me to call him? Guy one and guy two?

[Miles]

Just Mr. Brooks and Mr. Dunn.

[Tyler]

Okay, well, Mr. Dunn was having some vocal issues.

[Jared]

Cowboy ad.

[Miles]

What were you laughing about, Jared?

[Jared]

What?

[Miles]

Before I said that?

[Jared]

Oh, I don't. Just Brooks and done.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

You just thought it was. Yeah.

[Miles]

Kicks Brooks here. Welcome to the Hot 20 Country Countdown. Now, before we get back to the countdown, let's look at a little letter from our friend Sharon. Sharon, looks like you've been battling some cancer now for the last three years. Well, I tell you what, all our thoughts and prayers are going out to you and your family, and I think that you're gonna kick that canc right in the teeth. Now let's get back to the countdown. Here's John Party.

[Tyler]

This next song's for you. Sharon, wake up.

[Miles]

Coffee? Yeah.

[Jared]

Oh, yeah.

[Tyler]

Luke Bryan.

[Jared]

So when Luke Bryan says 18 in

[Miles]

that song, he's talking golf.

[Jared]

My wife thought he met like 18 year olds.

[Tyler]

Oh, very funny.

[Miles]

People also thought climb Tree in that song meant that he was just like climbing a tree for fun, like a kid.

[Jared]

Oh, okay. I was like a tall woman.

[Miles]

The whole thing is about women. What would. What would. What would be? I suppose you're hunting women, drinking women, fishing for women.

[Jared]

Yeah. Maybe he's a better songwriter than we think. Luke Bryan. Maybe not.

[Miles]

His other song, I believe, is All My Friends say yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tyler]

And then there's one Tequila Two tequila, three tequila more, and then kick the dust up.

[Miles]

Oh my God. On my list of least favorite country songs of all time, when he says

[Jared]

not goes to Diesel. I gotta chill down my spot.

[Miles]

It's, it's. And not a good chill, right? Deuce chill, deuce chill. I don't know, man. I just, I, I also think, yeah, like, if he wasn't a good looking guy willing to like, you know, I don't hump the air on stage, would he even be where he's at? Like, the fact he's American Idol judge is crazy.

[Tyler]

It is.

[Jared]

I.

[Tyler]

We still watch American Idol.

[Jared]

Who are you to judge, Lou?

[Tyler]

Yeah, they. The judges sing as well as the contestants at the end. And he's worse than every contestant.

[Miles]

Insane.

[Jared]

I gotta feel like Ryan likes Luke Bryan.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I mean, no, I'm not a huge Luke.

[Miles]

Brian, what's your favorite Luke Bryan song?

[Tyler]

Is it Knocking?

[Ryan]

Well, that's why I haven't, I haven't contributed much to this conversation because I don't know, I just like, I know just. I just know that Luke Bryan kind of sucks.

[Jared]

Gotcha. I thought you were.

[Ryan]

I'm not going to seek him out on my Spotify.

[Jared]

Right. You know, Spotify DJ will play that for you.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Or I'll skip it.

[Miles]

Also, maybe a smoke settling moment here. I'd say a smoke is settled on like the, the AI DJ on Spotify, you know I'm talking about.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jared]

Hey, Miles, let me spin it back to 2023.

[Miles]

Is anyone still using that? Like I tried it for a little bit and I haven't used it in years.

[Jared]

I keep trying it, I keep not liking it.

[Ryan]

I didn't even know that was a thing.

[Jared]

Try it out.

[Ryan]

I'm a surface level Spotify guy though. I just, I go, I go in. I.

[Miles]

Is there anything you're deep level on? Yeah, well, the sports cards on ebay,

[Ryan]

I go deep on like a, a couple things at a time, but I also go. I go very.

[Tyler]

We were just talking about. About running and you know a lot of. About running. The way you're talking about it made it seem deep.

[Ryan]

I do know. I do. I do know a decent amount about running.

[Tyler]

Yeah. So there's one.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Tyler]

You're not surface level on that.

[Ryan]

No. Yeah. Sports cards. I'd like to say I'm pretty knowledgeable when it comes to lawn care.

[Tyler]

All right.

[Miles]

I got a brown patch in one of my area of my lawn. I think it's because it's where the drift sits in the winter.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And so There was like some full damage, but that seems to gone away. But there's just. It almost seems like winter kill. How do I fix that?

[Ryan]

Well, I'd have to see it in person first.

[Miles]

But it's just like. It's just kind of a dormant patch.

[Ryan]

Have you felt like. Does it feel compact? Is the ground feel very compact?

[Miles]

I haven't checked the compactness of the ground compaction can.

[Ryan]

I mean it just doesn't. When you water up a piece of grass that's very compact, it's just going to run straight off.

[Miles]

Got it. So the drift could have compacted the ground over the winter and therefore it's not getting the nutrients that it needs.

[Tyler]

That was pretty deep level.

[Miles]

That was good.

[Jared]

I agree.

[Miles]

I mean technically the advice you gave me was surface level because it's compacted in the water, can't penetrate trade deep.

[Jared]

And it's a surface. Yes.

[Ryan]

I would. I just recommend aerating. Aerating?

[Tyler]

Aerating.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Which aerating gets a little below surface level. A couple. Maybe an inch or two. So we.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Ryan]

We broke the surface with that one.

[Miles]

That was good. That was actually pretty good. Ryan.

[Tyler]

That.

[Ryan]

That would be my assumption. Could be fungus too. I guess I. Again, I just have to maybe look at it.

[Miles]

Yeah. I'll have to get you over the house, take a peep at it.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I hate bro. I'm dealing with that right now. We'll get started on that.

[Tyler]

But

[Ryan]

that's one of my stressors in life is trying to figure out what's going on with my grass and why it's not green. Really green.

[Jared]

I'm pretty dry.

[Ryan]

It's been dry. But I also have. I have irrigation so I can't use that. I. I do use as. As an excuse, but I try not to. Gotta be a different.

[Jared]

Do you get water from the river to water your lawn?

[Ryan]

No. I wish. So, okay. If I had a pump, I. I would have to run about a 300 yard pump, 250 yard pump to the river. And then because it fluctuates so much up and down and there's trees coming to like that thing would get ripped off and. Yeah, I'm sure that's true. I would love that.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And you'd have to go through someone else's to get there.

[Ryan]

Correct? Yeah.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Yep. Yep.

[Miles]

So. Well, what do you got for us today, Jared?

[Jared]

I made. I expanded my culinary skills this week. Let's go this weekend.

[Miles]

I like this party.

[Ryan]

Ribs this time.

[Jared]

Coqavan.

[Tyler]

Really?

[Miles]

I don't even know what you just call me I. I don't know what that is.

[Tyler]

I know what.

[Miles]

I don't know what that is.

[Jared]

It's French.

[Miles]

I don't know what that. Well, you're not saying it French at all.

[Ryan]

That's German, Tyler.

[Miles]

Yeah, that was so German.

[Tyler]

That was guy choking on something,

[Jared]

I think.

[Ryan]

So you just.

[Miles]

If you're speaking French, just eliminate a lot of the consonants.

[Ryan]

So what is coco?

[Jared]

Probably how it's pronounced so well, as you know, it translates to rooster with. Or. And wine.

[Miles]

Rooster and wine.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Chicken and wine.

[Jared]

Chicken and wine and bacon. And it turned out super good.

[Ryan]

So bacon.

[Miles]

So you're cooking chicken in wine wrapped in bacon?

[Jared]

No.

[Miles]

So you're cooking bacon in wine, then taking the bacon and wrapping it on the chicken.

[Jared]

No wrapping.

[Ryan]

So you're buying rotisserie chicken, having a bottle of barefoot, and then just throwing a slab of bacon.

[Tyler]

No, he's sprinkling bacon bits on top.

[Ryan]

Got it.

[Miles]

Okay, so you're drinking. You're drinking wine while you cook chicken and bacon. No, you are having chicken cutlets that are not wrapped but they're laid on bacon. And then you're. You're spritzing wine on it after it's cooked.

[Tyler]

I think it's. Jared is complaining. He's whining while making chicken nuggets and feeding his dog begging strips.

[Miles]

Yeah, could be it. Is that it, Jared?

[Jared]

It got. Nailed it.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

I knew it. That's very.

[Miles]

Wait, time out. So it's. You said it's. It's. It's chicken, wine and bacon.

[Jared]

Yes.

[Miles]

So you're bacon chicken while you're whining.

[Jared]

Bacon chicken while I'm whining.

[Miles]

You know, like B, A K, I, N, G. You're baking chicken while you're whining like a little bitch. So you just made chicken this weekend, fried bacon.

[Jared]

And then you put the chicken thighs with the bacon, and then you put wine in it and beef stock, and then you let it settle.

[Miles]

What do you mean by let it settle?

[Jared]

You cook down the wine.

[Ryan]

Just let it simmer.

[Miles]

Simmer?

[Jared]

Yep.

[Ryan]

You cook down the wine, Soak it in.

[Tyler]

So do you like. Are you like, splashing the wine and the bacon grease onto the chicken?

[Jared]

No, you're putting, like, basically three quarters of bottle plus chicken stock in there too. So it's like a simmering up there.

[Tyler]

And then the bone. You just pull the bone right out of the bone, basically.

[Jared]

Yeah, for like an hour.

[Miles]

It turned out really good.

[Ryan]

Do you eat it as a soup or do you take the chicken?

[Miles]

So these are chicken wings.

[Jared]

Chicken Thighs.

[Miles]

Chicken thighs. Yeah.

[Jared]

Tomato. Tomato. Yeah.

[Miles]

Well, yep. I was thinking breast. I was thinking chicken breast.

[Jared]

It's gonna be a thigh.

[Ryan]

Boobies.

[Miles]

So then you're just eating the bacon separately, or is that what.

[Jared]

So then it makes, like, a sauce, and you combine the bacon and the chicken, and you pour it over, like, egg noodles or potatoes.

[Ryan]

Yum.

[Miles]

Yeah, this is.

[Tyler]

That sounds good.

[Miles]

Sounds good. But, man, this is pretty fancy shit.

[Tyler]

He's deep. He's a deep level chef.

[Jared]

It's actually really easy.

[Ryan]

What? It's.

[Miles]

That's what every fucking chef says ever. And then I get into something like that, and I'm like, this is hard.

[Ryan]

What kind of wine? Snoop Dogg's wine.

[Miles]

I didn't get a good Yao Ming's wine. I might as well have a wine.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah, Yao Ming does.

[Miles]

Yeah. I've had.

[Jared]

Wasn't a good wine.

[Miles]

It was just a cheap wine. Yeah, it's. It's a good one to cook with.

[Ryan]

M. Meomi.

[Jared]

It was just too. I think I put a little bit too much in because it was a little too sweet, the dish, but it turned out good.

[Miles]

So how does one stumble upon. What Was this, Choco YouTube shorts again?

[Jared]

They got me. Same with the ribs.

[Miles]

Okay, so your algorithm is just full of recipes.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Why didn't you start cooking for the office once a week?

[Tyler]

Yeah, dude, Jared lunches on Tuesdays.

[Jared]

Any requests?

[Tyler]

I have to be a co.

[Miles]

Here's what we should do. We should bring a hot plate in, and then we'll just record Jared Megan as a lunch once a week and put it on Patreon.

[Tyler]

There we go.

[Miles]

And then you got to talk to it like you're Emerald Bam Bam. And we can call it. What do you want to call it?

[Jared]

Baming with Jared.

[Miles]

Bam with Jared. You can't do booming with Jared Banging. With Jared Banging.

[Tyler]

You can make bang bang shrimp.

[Miles]

If you do it on the bus, you can be called the bank bus, and it can be bang bus with Jared. And you can just cook Bang bang shrimp on a bus.

[Ryan]

Bus banging.

[Tyler]

Or you just drive around town and give your. Your bang bang shrimp to people. Yeah.

[Miles]

You just start giving them your shrimp.

[Ryan]

Your cocktail shrimp.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Your cocktail shrimp.

[Jared]

I do have shrimp cocktail.

[Ryan]

Me too.

[Miles]

Why don't you make that?

[Jared]

I don't know how to make. I think you just even make cocktail sauce.

[Ryan]

You didn't buy it from the store.

[Miles]

Well, it's good, Jared. So it tasted good.

[Jared]

Tastes great.

[Miles]

Will your wife always say it's good and lie to you?

[Jared]

Probably.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

That's kind of Acceptable.

[Tyler]

I got. I asked her a fun fact one day about Jared, and she literally said, he is an excellent chef.

[Miles]

I know, but, like, excellent chefs once sometimes swing and miss on stuff. Will she tell you if you swing and miss?

[Jared]

She will. Like, two days after. Not right away, though.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Well, I think you'll know if you swing and miss.

[Jared]

Yes, I will.

[Miles]

Which I don't really.

[Ryan]

You're the probably your biggest critic, right?

[Jared]

I have a good tongue.

[Ryan]

Yeah, she did.

[Miles]

Would your wife agree?

[Jared]

Yeah, I think so.

[Tyler]

That's some cocoa. Fun.

[Ryan]

So how do you decide what you're going to make?

[Jared]

YouTube Shorts. Okay, so, like, YouTube Shorts is running my culinary life.

[Ryan]

So tonight you'll just be like, you don't know what you're cooking tonight, let's say. So on your way home or when you're parked somewhere, you'll be scrolling YouTube shorts and be like, this is what I'm going to make.

[Jared]

Yeah, I made a beef bolognese ragu on Saturday, too, and I have that leftover now, so I'm going to eat that tonight.

[Miles]

Fuck, yeah.

[Ryan]

So, like, pretty dank, actually.

[Miles]

Are you. Is this a phase or do you think, like, for the rest of your life you're just going to be making recipes? Recipes every weekend?

[Jared]

I like to think it'll be the rest of my life because it is a lot of fun.

[Miles]

Is it a lot of work, though?

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I feel like the ingredients part of cooking is the thing that turns me off. Same.

[Jared]

It's actually easier than you think,

[Tyler]

but,

[Miles]

like, if I had a kitchen that would just automatically spawn whatever ingredients I would need, I would feel like I would cook way more.

[Ryan]

Well, I don't even know where half the ingredients are.

[Tyler]

Oh, my God.

[Ryan]

So then I'm. I'm shooting. I'm shooting. Text off being like, hey, where's the bowling? Where's the bowling Y. Where's the beef? Beef stock?

[Miles]

But sometimes even, like, your wife doesn't even know. It's like, fucking ask someone where a certain seasoning is, Jeeves.

[Tyler]

We have a chest freezer in one room. We have a downstairs beer fridge with a freezer above and then the freezer in our actual kitchen. So I literally texted my wife, like, where the fuck are the chicken patties?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Like, I looked in all three freezers. I can't find them. She's like, oh, they're underneath the broccoli in this one spot.

[Ryan]

Yeah, we have. We have seasoning in three different spots as well.

[Tyler]

Oh, yeah.

[Ryan]

So, well, that. And that's the biggest.

[Miles]

That's the Big thing. Yeah. That's one of my biggest gripes right now with our family is that nothing is where it should be. In our kitchen.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

At the lake. The lake's the worst. We have fucking cups in the pantry. It's a disaster. Cups. It's a disaster.

[Ryan]

So are you the.

[Miles]

The stuff. I'm going to tell you what's next to the stove. So there's three drawers on the right, and then a lazy Susan on the left. The lazy Susan is just bowl. Like mixing bowls, which is pretty standard, I feel like, for a lazy Susan, maybe Tupperware, but. And then on the other side, it's. There's a lighter, a oven mitt, and then there's two empty drawers. Guess. Guess where the pots and pans are. Underneath the stove in the island on the drawer farthest away from the stove. Ouch.

[Tyler]

The only thing that makes sense out of your. The next to the stove is the one oven mitt.

[Miles]

Correct? Yes. Yep. So then above the microwave. We got booze in there. And then we do have, like. We do have, like, seasonings. That's next to the stove.

[Jared]

Up.

[Miles]

Up on top, to the right of the microwave.

[Tyler]

Seasoning should go in your prep area.

[Miles]

I. Yeah.

[Tyler]

Because you're putting the seasoning on and prep.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

I would say 60 of the time.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

So who is waiting for the other to make a move?

[Miles]

Well, there's no. It's just only me.

[Ryan]

Got it.

[Miles]

My wife would go 60 years with the kitchen like this.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Miles]

And not care.

[Ryan]

So it's. Nothing's gonna change unless you change it yourself.

[Jared]

Correct.

[Miles]

But that's kind of a good life lesson, Ryan.

[Tyler]

Since we moved into our house, my wife has reorganized the kitchen three separate times, and she has made it better every time, but I can't keep up.

[Jared]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tyler]

It's every three months.

[Ryan]

Just when you get into a routine

[Tyler]

I'll get used to. Like, the only thing that hasn't changed is the silverware drawer. So thank God that one's where it is. Otherwise I'd be lost. I'm lost in my own kitchen half the time.

[Ryan]

She move the garbage around

[Tyler]

one Only once.

[Miles]

That's crazy. Yeah.

[Ryan]

That is crazy.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Is it a pull out?

[Tyler]

No.

[Ryan]

Okay. I was gonna say if it's a pull out and she's like.

[Tyler]

She's unscrewing the tracks.

[Jared]

That would be really annoying.

[Ryan]

You're the saga. And she's cutting out a new.

[Tyler]

What are you doing?

[Miles]

The house. We have. Yeah. It's like the top drawer next to the stove at our house. Is like our batteries drawer. Batteries and matches.

[Jared]

And next to the stove.

[Miles]

Yep.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Miles]

It's basically a junk drawer next to the stove. And then we have like, like pans.

[Tyler]

Right.

[Miles]

So if you're gonna like do an egg bake or whatever, like those type of pans, the next drawer down, which is fine. But we use that maybe once a month. Like we don't cook a lot of pan stuff. And then the bottom. The thing we use a lot is Tupperware is the one in the bottom drawer.

[Jared]

So the.

[Miles]

The farthest I gotta bend over is where all the stuff we use. Sure. It's a disaster.

[Tyler]

It was just a next drawer up situation when you were unpacking.

[Miles]

It was just everything just goes anywhere apparently.

[Jared]

Plus your batteries and matches by the stove is probably not the best.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Miles]

There is a column where like the cookie sheets are in. So it's not like directly next to it. So it's fine.

[Tyler]

At least the cookie sheets are in that thing and not in a cupboard somewhere.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

In the garage.

[Ryan]

Or like underneath everything in the junk drawer. The cookies are the bottom.

[Miles]

And then there's also no rhyme or reason. So we have like a. We have a walk in pantry around the corner. And then we also have like a. We. We've gotten better at it, but like a pantry with doors with the slide out things in the kitchen. But for a while it was like, I don't know which pantry this item is in. And so you just would have to just guess. Play pantry roulette.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You know not to brag. I do have two pantries, but it was a disaster. Disaster.

[Tyler]

I know. I. I've. I've perused your cupboard several times looking for when we're doing videos and stuff.

[Miles]

It's not where it should be.

[Tyler]

The only thing I, I know where your coffee cups are and where your silverware are and the rest of it. If we need a plate or a pan or something, I'm just opening up doors. Yep.

[Miles]

But yeah, it's too bad.

[Ryan]

So is that above or below staining the bench?

[Jared]

Good question.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Will you ever do this priority wise? Will you ever fix the kitchen?

[Miles]

I don't know. The way the one at the. The lake needs. Needs to be redone. That one's highest priority for me right now. That's definitely over the bench.

[Jared]

Like it.

[Ryan]

Will it take a kitchen renovation in 20 years to get it done?

[Miles]

No, no, no, no.

[Jared]

All right.

[Miles]

No, it's gotta get done before that.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Jared]

Bags feel better. Seasonings do expire, so you can just throw them all away and start new.

[Miles]

Yeah. Just put it. Or just any new ones we buy, start in the next drawer.

[Jared]

Exactly.

[Tyler]

And. But then you have seasonings in two

[Miles]

spots again until they expire. Then we're good.

[Ryan]

Does anyone check expiration date on seasons?

[Miles]

Even if I see it's expired, I still use it.

[Tyler]

Yeah, we.

[Ryan]

I just finish some burger seasoning. It was like four years old.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Jared]

You might want.

[Ryan]

I mean, it was a big. It was a big, big jug.

[Jared]

You might want to go to the doctor.

[Miles]

I just feel like he got the runs bad, but other than that, he was fine.

[Tyler]

I just feel like anything that can't spoil or grow mold, the expiration date is just kind of there for show.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it's all dried out.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Too.

[Jared]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tyler]

Penicillin's mold.

[Ryan]

Exactly.

[Miles]

I was gonna say it. Yeah, I agree. All right, what are we talking about today, Jared?

[Jared]

Twos and don'ts first day on the job.

[Miles]

Do's and don'ts the first day on the job. This is any job.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I think. Do you do want to set boundaries on the first day

[Ryan]

in terms of like, how hard you work?

[Miles]

No. Bound. Yeah, that's a good one.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You can start with that being like, hey, just so you know, clock strikes five, I'm done. I'm not talking to any of you.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Because I feel like if you stay, if you stay late for the first couple weeks, you're going to be expected to stay late for forever.

[Miles]

Honestly. Set boundaries, leave early.

[Tyler]

He sets up early on your first

[Miles]

day because if you work extra, they're going to expect that from you.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

But if you leave, let's say be done at 5, you leave at 4:45. The next day you show up, you. You stay till 4:46. Big wow. Really starting to improve.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I want to set the bar low on your first day so that you can always. It's, you know, you can coast the first six months and always still be improving.

[Ryan]

How early is too early to show up on the first day?

[Miles]

I mean, just early in general is kind of try hard move.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Ryan]

Okay. All right.

[Miles]

Like, oh, we start working nine. Show up at 8:58. You're chilling.

[Ryan]

Okay. Well, I feel, I feel like if you should. If you show up before everyone else, even if it's like if everyone else. If everyone shows up at 9, but you show up at 8:55, they. They might think you've been there for a half hour.

[Miles]

That's true.

[Ryan]

So leaving at 4:30, 4:45, be the

[Miles]

first one there, even if it's only by a minute.

[Ryan]

Correct.

[Miles]

And then, yeah, you look like you've been there for. You could just be like, oh, God, I already own my eighth cup of coffee.

[Ryan]

Ruffle your hair up a little bit.

[Tyler]

Just make sure everybody at that office knows how early you were there too. Like, just tell everybody that you were

[Ryan]

there, otherwise they're not gonna understand your system.

[Miles]

I think sometimes too, when someone starts a new job, there's always a question of, like, what are they doing? You know, are they doing the right work? So just start by announcing all the work that you're doing. You know, you're an accountant. Be like spreadsheets. Done.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And honestly, people like working at a fast paced, competitive environment. I know this because that's what's on everyone's resume. Is that what they're. That's what they're looking for. And so everyone working there is there because of the fast paced, competitive work environment. And so make it a fast paced, competitive work environment. Run everywhere.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And if people get to the bathroom,

[Miles]

you don't want to be a liar on your resume. If that's on your resume, you better show up, you better be competitive. You've started. Better start talking shit. You better start running everywhere. So it can be a fast paced, competitive work environment.

[Tyler]

And if mentality, if you put that you're detail oriented on your resume to make sure you start pointing out the little details that other people are doing wrong.

[Miles]

Hey, you got to trim your beard, dude.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You have a couple of strategies. And then also reference the handbook a lot. The employee handbook. Read it cover to cover and like, oh, you know, in the handbook, section 8C, it says that we need to keep all beards well kept. And Jared, you're looking like a fucking hobo.

[Tyler]

And maybe thank you for telling me that. Maybe don't even tell the person the details. Just go over there straight to their superior.

[Miles]

Or hr. People love when you go to hr.

[Ryan]

Well, if you're getting good with hr, then, I mean, that's going to soften some future violations potentially.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

But I do think that that referencing the handbook also shows long term that you're a company man or woman.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Also, you don't want to come off as stiff the first day. So just maybe show up a little hungover, let your co workers know that you're there to party. You're a good time too.

[Ryan]

But also, if you want to make a statement, walk into work stiff.

[Tyler]

Yes.

[Ryan]

Because then it shows you how rock hard you are about the job.

[Tyler]

Stiff and hungover.

[Miles]

Yeah. You know okay. And also running, which I don't know. I don't know if you guys sets the tone.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I mean, I don't know if you guys know anything about getting a boner. Just as I think what we're talking about.

[Tyler]

I think so too.

[Miles]

Possible to keep while running.

[Tyler]

For sure.

[Miles]

And so if you're able to run and keep a boner and be like, this guy's hardcore. I'm glad he's on my team and we're not competing against him.

[Ryan]

Exactly.

[Jared]

Is competitive.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Yeah, maybe.

[Miles]

And. And he's fast paced, which is exactly what I'm looking for in a work environment.

[Ryan]

Could give you an opportunity to dip out like. Like mid morning too. And everyone's like, where are you going to just. You just tell them that you're going to go get an extra set of compression shorts because you're so rock hard. Well, that's also because they don't want.

[Miles]

You don't want anyone to be ladies. If you do, if you do want to be the prankster, you want to be a prankster in the office, show up rock hard. And if people are getting uncomfortable, just say like, oh, I just haven't knocked off my morning wood yet. And this just so you know, this happens quite a bit. And I've been up for three hours and I still have morning wood. Yeah.

[Ryan]

I haven't had a chance to chop wood this morning.

[Tyler]

And if you don't stop looking at it, I'm going to report at you to hr.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

This is a medical condition that I just have extra long mooring wood. Unless it gets knocked off somehow.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And then just like, unless you're trying to help me out with it. Yeah. And then.

[Miles]

Well, that's kind of. That's too far, Tom.

[Tyler]

Wow.

[Miles]

The boner's fine on the first day, but asking someone to knock it off, I'm saying crazy on the first day. Tyler, are you kidding me?

[Tyler]

You need to do this in the first day. You need to do this in the first 10 minutes to set the tone.

[Miles]

It is first day is all about setting the tone. So I think that could probably be good.

[Jared]

Make sure enough safe buildings will pull the fire alarm.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah. See how well they know the fire drill.

[Ryan]

Yes.

[Miles]

Hold that fire alarm. Get the authorities there. Also, it's good to know what kind of authorities you're dealing with at this workplace.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Just to say you wanted to meet the local firefighters, make sure you have good rapport.

[Miles]

Want to meet the local, shake hands. Calling a bomb threat.

[Tyler]

Both active shooter, false alarm.

[Miles]

You know, Hey, a great way to, you know, if you're like a sales guy and you, you're in an office building with other businesses, you want to sell to them, calling a bomb threat, everyone will have to vacate the, the building. And then you can hand out your card to everybody.

[Ryan]

Yeah. And you're ready for your pitch. I mean, you're already rock hard. They can see how rock hard you are about selling product. Get some, Write some names, start. Get some meetings scheduled.

[Miles]

Start off the first meeting with an icebreaker. Ask everyone what they and where they were at 9, 11.

[Tyler]

Come on, I know you all remember.

[Miles]

And then you also can get a gauge on how old everyone is without having to ask them.

[Ryan]

Exactly, true. Exactly.

[Miles]

Trojan horse. Yeah,

[Jared]

Bring in like, your little cousin's, like, fundraiser. So raise money.

[Miles]

Sell them coupon books.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that's what I mean.

[Miles]

Because, like, honestly, they're probably like, oh, what a great deal. This $20 coupon book is worth 200 bucks. Wow. My new co worker just made me 200 bucks. You say everyone likes the guy who sells coupon books.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I, I, I do love a good raffle ticket where you can win some guns. Potential to win some guns. Yeah. I've never won a gun. Not present to win, though.

[Miles]

Yeah, that's a good idea, Ryan. Show up with a gun and raffle it off. First day.

[Tyler]

Good morning.

[Miles]

Good morning, everybody who wants it. And then you do $500 tickets.

[Ryan]

You sell 10 of them.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And then you do need to prove that it's a working gun. So maybe just try a desk pop. Show them that it works.

[Ryan]

Yep. Yep.

[Miles]

Could be the move. Honestly.

[Tyler]

Easy peasy.

[Ryan]

I think I do think you need to test out the. You got to test out the restrooms, obviously, right away. You need to time yourself and see how long it actually takes for your legs to fall asleep.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Do it matters? Breakfast.

[Miles]

I think it's also important to know if this is going to be a bathroom that you can drop your nastiest shits in terms of how much smell leakage is out. So make sure you just hammer like Taco Bell the night before. The first thing you do when you get there, drop a deuce. And then ask people if they smelt it or not. And if not, then you're in the clear.

[Ryan]

Yeah. But play it off like, oh, you guys smell that? And if they're like, no, we don't smell anything. Then you're good.

[Miles]

Then you're good.

[Ryan]

Yeah. It's all about testing waters.

[Miles]

You also want to see what kind of sense of Humor is in the office. So try a bunch of jokes. You know, start with just ripping ass. Because if this is an office that thinks farts are funny, you're in for a treat.

[Tyler]

You also want the right spot. You want to get to know your co workers. So just ask every single one of them for a bite of their lunch. You can tell a lot about what a person eats for lunch. Right.

[Ryan]

But first ask what they're having, because if it's, if it's a chicken boyonnaise or whatever we were cooking over here. Jared, you might not like Coco. Yeah. You might not like it might be allergic. But that's also a good way to, you know, get out of work that day is if you know you're allergic to something. See if you can try that out.

[Miles]

I think another thing, good thing to signal to your co workers and your boss is that you're always learning. And so on your lunch break, just do your dual lingo lesson out loud in the break room.

[Tyler]

Have you experienced this?

[Miles]

What do you mean?

[Tyler]

I don't know. It just feels like.

[Miles]

Have you ever done duolingo, though?

[Tyler]

No.

[Miles]

It's like Dua Lipa. It's like the language app.

[Tyler]

I know what it is.

[Miles]

Yeah, but like you have to do where you say the stuff and then it tells you if you got it right or not. And then it also will you put it on high volume in it.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Miles]

It's not as funny when I had to explain it to Tyler, but. But it's all right.

[Ryan]

But it also shows shows bossman, that you're looking to expand into international markets.

[Miles]

Yeah, start. Start hitting the Mandarin on duolingo.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

There was a moment where we thought about, because of how much you were having to work with overseas about learning Mandarin. You almost got a company issued duolingo subscription.

[Jared]

This close.

[Miles]

You were this close. We had the discussion.

[Ryan]

I, I, I had an account made. Just never pulled the trigger.

[Jared]

That's all right, I think. Mandarin, Mandarin, Mandarin, Mandarin, Mandarin. I think that's like the hardest language to learn too.

[Ryan]

It is. Yeah.

[Miles]

That nothing gets. That would get Ryan rock hard.

[Ryan]

I'd have to be all in on it, though.

[Tyler]

Mandarin and English are the two most complicated languages and they're the two most widely spoken, which makes sense.

[Ryan]

English is pretty easy because we know English. Okay.

[Miles]

That's what he was saying.

[Jared]

Do ask your co workers. They want to be on Tik Tok videos.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Build camaraderie.

[Miles]

Yeah, well, well, camaraderie. Or even just like suggest that the way that we can make More sales at this company is by doing TikTok videos first day. So you just bring a ring light.

[Tyler]

Yep. Set your phone up in it and just start doing the Renegade. Because that'll never go out of style. For sure.

[Jared]

Sure.

[Miles]

It's probably a huge portion of the audience don't even know what that is.

[Tyler]

Yeah, well, now they can look it up.

[Ryan]

I think meta glasses could be a huge advantage to you. Catch people, catch people slacking. And then you could report.

[Jared]

I put a little electrical tape over where it says it's recording.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

So you don't want people to know you're recording.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah. Well, it's like, oh, I bought these glasses. I didn't know that they recorded, so I just covered this up.

[Tyler]

Hey, yeah. Record. Oh, what the heck is going on?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

What the.

[Ryan]

And stealing my data.

[Miles]

I think what's important is, is when you have one on one meetings with people, make sure you close the door and start recording and press the button and make sure that they know that it's recording. Because the last thing you'd want is something to be said in a one on one meeting and no one else hear about it. So you can, you have the footage to be able to.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You know, it's like your boss is a woman. Close the door, click the button, it says recording started and then just start the meeting. You know, and I think that that shows that like you're willing to watch tape and learn from what your boss has to say or do. Or do.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And I think that could be a good way you could say it's for

[Ryan]

training purposes only to your training purposes.

[Miles]

I watch this later and they like the glasses only record like 10 minutes at a time. Our meeting, you have to press here. Recording stopped. Recording started.

[Tyler]

Did it?

[Jared]

Is that real quick?

[Miles]

Yeah, sorry, I didn't want to miss anything.

[Tyler]

One second, one second, one second, one second.

[Miles]

So that would be probably a good thing to do on your first day.

[Ryan]

Yeah. How about don'ts?

[Miles]

Oh, don'ts.

[Jared]

Don't have a firm handshake.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Limp wrist. Everybody you can.

[Miles]

If you come out gates hot, they're going to expect that for you.

[Ryan]

Exactly. Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean, just don't have a good attitude, honestly. So when you do have a good attitude, everyone's. Everyone's loving it, you know, because like if you come in with a great attitude, you have to be the great attitude guy the rest of your life.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jared]

It's all about something.

[Ryan]

It is exhausting.

[Miles]

Just don't set the bar high. Honestly.

[Jared]

Don't Follow the dress code first bad boy. The cool. Yeah.

[Miles]

First day you need to be thinking about end of the year Christmas party awards and you need to win most improved. You're not going to win mvp.

[Ryan]

Yeah. You got to have at least one or two to at least one talk where like your borderline maybe going to get fired.

[Jared]

So you could be rookie of the year and most improved.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Correct. Yeah. You need to be, you need to lay the foundation on your first day to win most improved at the end of the year.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Yep. And what you should actually what you should do is you should put like a, like a, just an empty shelf up in your office right next to your diploma. And that shelf fits two trophies. Rookie of the year most improved. People ask why is that shelf empty? It's like, well, it won't be at a Christmas party.

[Tyler]

Just put the labels in there ahead of time for sure.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

So everyone knows what you're gunning for.

[Ryan]

2026. MVP or Rookie of the year if

[Jared]

you play your cards. Or you could win most improved two years in a row.

[Ryan]

Yeah, you could. Yeah.

[Tyler]

If you set the bar low enough right away.

[Miles]

If you set the bar low enough, dude, you just have to improve. We just have to prove the most.

[Ryan]

Your co workers, they're. They're static.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

They're just doing their job and they're not getting.

[Miles]

On a scale of 1 to 10, if you start as a 1 and you go to a 2, that's 100 improvement. It's a 200 improvement.

[Ryan]

Yes.

[Tyler]

Also, I mean you know how hard

[Miles]

it is for a, for a nine to. To improve. 200. You can't do it.

[Tyler]

And you could also just hinder other people's progress to make sure you get most improved. Just their spreadsheets up. That's another do.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah. Honestly, set the bar low, improve a little and then distract everyone else in the office that can't win. Most improvement.

[Jared]

Sabotage. Sabotage.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Rock hard boner is going to be distraction enough in itself.

[Miles]

Oh yeah, I forgot we have a boner on day one.

[Jared]

This whole time,

[Miles]

imagine sitting here first meeting with your female boss your rock hard. Because your morning wood and been knocked off yet. And you just click your glasses. It says stuff recording started.

[Tyler]

You are going to get that meeting with HR pretty quick.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah. Get to know the HR person. Just do something inappropriate right away so you can have your first meeting.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Smart. You know you're gonna be seeing a lot of me.

[Miles]

And then right when you get out of the HR meeting, call in that bomb threat, pull the fire alarm. Get to know that. Just get to know everyone.

[Ryan]

Well, it's time to get to work. We got sales meetings to schedule.

[Jared]

I like the idea of calling a bob thread then pulling the fire alert.

[Miles]

Well, then you can see. Well then you could see who Response time.

[Jared]

Right.

[Miles]

You know what I mean? So you know how much time you have and then you tell the boss, why did you do that? Say, I wanted to see how much time I have to do more work before they make kicked us out of the building.

[Jared]

Like, why wouldn't I do that?

[Miles]

Why wouldn't I? That makes total sense.

[Tyler]

Single signal to the fire department because they're going to be alerted to the bomb threat as well. They're going to just think the bomb went off. If the fire alarm gets pulled after

[Miles]

the bomb, it'll say bomb threat. It won't say that the bomb went off. There's a completely different.

[Tyler]

No, but if, if there's fire and smoke, which you're right.

[Miles]

So we need to pull the fire alarm first, then call the bomb.

[Jared]

That's a good sequence.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Bomb threats in the parking lot, in your co. In your co workers car.

[Miles]

And they show up.

[Jared]

Right?

[Miles]

And they show up and you're right in the middle of your gun raffle.

[Tyler]

Who wants it?

[Ryan]

It's a good way to pass the

[Miles]

time where while chief is, you know, oh, hey, firefighter. Recording started. I want to get all this on cam. I'm gonna show my wife this later.

[Tyler]

This is not an ax. I am just happy to see you.

[Miles]

The fire department shows up, you're like, you guys are fast. You're good, you're good.

[Tyler]

You guys got here way before the bombs.

[Miles]

Like, where's the fire? You're like, that was a drill and you guys did good.

[Tyler]

Do a 180. Instead of doing fire drills on your own, you do a fire drill on the fire department.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

It's about damn time.

[Miles]

I mean, honestly, see where your tax dollars are going.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Season bees and, and sell them. Tell them that when they show up. I just wanted to see where my tax dollars are going.

[Tyler]

The second the first firefighter gets out of the truck and you go and time.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ryan]

And record.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Recording started.

[Jared]

I'll get do the don't.

[Ryan]

Sounds like a road to success. Recording stopped.

[Tyler]

None of the we said is out of the realm of possibility for Michael Scott.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean, this just sounds like an episode of the Office. Very much so.

[Jared]

Right when.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I, I, I'm sure you guys are right.

[Tyler]

Like they had to have had a scrapped episode Where Michael gets a boner in the office.

[Miles]

Gotta. I mean, anchorman. He gets a boner.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Well, Jared, should we take a break?

[Jared]

Yeah, let's do it.

[Miles]

Okay. Who's going first? All right, guys. Welcome back, Jared. So Jared wants to do a fast food menu. Waits. Jared wants to do a fast food menu item. Draft.

[Jared]

Yes.

[Miles]

Okay, so anything on a menu.

[Jared]

Anything on a menu.

[Miles]

Anything on a menu. Four rounds. Who goes first?

[Jared]

Let's have you go, Miles.

[Miles]

I hate having the first pick.

[Jared]

But the. You can. The nice thing about having the first pick, you can pick who gets the first pick, too. You have that power.

[Tyler]

For real.

[Ryan]

Wait, what?

[Jared]

Yeah, so you don't have to pick first.

[Ryan]

We've never done that.

[Miles]

Is that like a real.

[Ryan]

Let me just throw that out there. We've never done that.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Hidden.

[Ryan]

Hidden rule.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

I should have read the rulebook.

[Tyler]

Is that like an NFL draft rule?

[Jared]

The person. If the other person agrees to it, then yes.

[Tyler]

Is he just trading?

[Jared]

Yeah, that's what it is.

[Miles]

Oh, God. I mean, there's some. My mouth's gonna start watering. The one thing I want to clear up before we start this. What are we considering? Fast food. Right. So, like, is it like you have

[Jared]

to go through a drive through or order from a kiosk?

[Miles]

Because, like, in my mind, like, is like Jimmy John's fast food.

[Jared]

It's freaky fast food.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah. It's fastest food.

[Jared]

So it doesn't.

[Miles]

Okay, yeah. There's a different draft, I guess that's for the, you know, freaky fast food. Because, like. All right, so like, Jersey Mike's. Is that fast food?

[Tyler]

I feel like. No, because there's no window.

[Miles]

Yeah, I feel like it's going to be a window.

[Tyler]

I feel like there has to be a window. A drive thru with where you can order and pick up from a window.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

If you're standing when you order, it's fast food.

[Miles]

Well, no, because that. There's fast casual restaurants like McAllister's. That's not fast food.

[Jared]

I would say that's fast food.

[Miles]

That's fast casual.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I'm with you. I'm with you. I think. I think there has to be a window.

[Ryan]

Let's just. Let's set those boundaries right now.

[Jared]

So anything with the drive through, I think.

[Tyler]

But I would count, like. No, maybe I wouldn't. Like the Dairy Queen in Moorhead. I would. That is a fast food joint. But there's no drive through 99.

[Ryan]

That's the only one.

[Tyler]

Right, right, right, right, right.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Tyler]

No, I'm with you. Just go window. Anything with a drive through.

[Ryan]

Anything with a dry Fargo instead of more.

[Tyler]

Right.

[Miles]

So Little Caesars is fast food.

[Tyler]

I would totally say so. Okay.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

It's the only fast food pizza.

[Miles]

So Starbucks is fast food?

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

That's coffee. Yeah.

[Tyler]

You get food there?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Well, now my brain is starting to open up all sorts of stuff, so I like Chipotle. Not fast.

[Tyler]

Not fast food.

[Jared]

But they. Okay, but what?

[Miles]

That's.

[Jared]

They have.

[Miles]

That's fast casual.

[Jared]

They have a drive through.

[Ryan]

No, they don't.

[Miles]

No, they don't. No, they don't.

[Jared]

Chipotle this drive thru. It's called Chipotle.

[Miles]

Really? So is it fast food or not? Because I would not consider Chipotle fast food.

[Jared]

It's pretty fast to get it.

[Miles]

I know, but I guess. I guess my traditional view on fast food is, like, how shitty it is for you.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Miles]

Do you know what I mean?

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

So Subway's off the table.

[Miles]

No, Subway's shitty for you.

[Ryan]

How about, like, build your own is not fast food.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Jared]

BK have it your way.

[Miles]

You can. You can build your burger, but you

[Ryan]

just order something off the menu and be like, hey, no tomatoes.

[Miles]

That is true. That is a good distinction. And maybe it's good for this draft that if you are building your. If you're building it by standing there and going, yes, I'll do that and that.

[Tyler]

No, no, no.

[Miles]

And just a little bit of that. If you have to do that. Not fast.

[Tyler]

I'm with that. Yeah, we'll exclude it.

[Miles]

I'm. I'm with that.

[Tyler]

Yep.

[Miles]

Like, you're not. You're not in the back. You're not in the back at BK Telling them. Tell them if you. If you want pickles or ketchup.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah. You're not viewing them. Make it. If you view them, make it. And you're building it out.

[Miles]

Yep. Blaze pizza out.

[Tyler]

Subway, I think should be out.

[Jared]

Yeah. Technically.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Well, let's throw it out.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

I like that distinction.

[Tyler]

Y.

[Miles]

Throw them out. So is Jimmy John's fast food is the question? Because you don't get to stand there and be like, oh, there's no window there. You can. If you peek your head around the corner, you can see him make it. But you could do the same thing at McDonald's. You can kind of see him making it back.

[Tyler]

I think out of all the sandwich joints, Jimmy John gets in, Jimmy's in.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Cause, yeah, you don't really customize Jimmy John's.

[Tyler]

No, you order and you can do the Same thing you do at McDonald's. Say no onions.

[Miles]

If you order by the ingredient. Ouch.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Jared]

What about Firehouse?

[Tyler]

I'd say no, I'd. Is there a drive through?

[Jared]

I think so. Right?

[Tyler]

I don't think there is.

[Miles]

Not in the one that. Right over here. Maybe in one.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

There's rules.

[Tyler]

If you.

[Miles]

If you don't have a drive through, you're out automatically. And if you order by the ingredient, you're out.

[Jared]

Yeah. And we go. We can go pick by pick and judge if it's good enough or not.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

I don't think any of us are going to go crazy.

[Miles]

Speak for yourself.

[Tyler]

True. You do have the first pick that you can apparently give away.

[Miles]

If you want, you could trade it. No, I. I think I'm going to take this first overall because I think it's going to get taken by someone else and there's not a lot of good alternatives, you know?

[Tyler]

Yep.

[Miles]

And so for the first pick overall in the fast food draft, I'm gonna select a McDonald's Diet Coke. See, I knew we were all thinking it. I knew it. That number one, that was his number one pick. Let's go. McDonald's diet off the board.

[Tyler]

I don't know why, but I just thought. I just, for some reason thought you were all going to forget about how the Diet Coke is there.

[Ryan]

That's the first thing that came to mind.

[Miles]

Oh, my God.

[Tyler]

I don't know why I thought that.

[Miles]

And actually, I had McDonald's Diet Coke today.

[Jared]

Wow.

[Miles]

Apparently my wife took my kid to McDonald's for lunch and she had leftover Coke.

[Ryan]

She didn't ask if you want anything?

[Miles]

No, she knew I didn't want anything.

[Tyler]

You wanted something.

[Miles]

I wanted something bad.

[Tyler]

Something.

[Ryan]

Which way are we going?

[Jared]

We'll go to you next.

[Tyler]

You can give your second pick away. Did you know that?

[Miles]

I mean, you technically can do that in a regular draft. NFL draft. You can just. Just declined not to draft.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

What was that? That's in a row. Yeah.

[Miles]

That. That pisses me off. And I'm not even a fan.

[Jared]

I know it was very frustrating when it happened. It worked out for him, but it was very, very bad.

[Miles]

All right.

[Ryan]

All right.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Nothing else loaded up?

[Ryan]

No, I did. I do. But I.

[Miles]

Talk us through your thought process here. You're on the clock.

[Ryan]

Well, what I have listed out right now, I. I think I can get them at any time. That's the thing. And one of them is a surefire. The other one is kind of a sneaky little hidden gem. I'LL go with the sneaky hidden gem. All right, for my first pick, I'm going Taco John's Potato A Lays.

[Miles]

That is.

[Ryan]

That is good with nacho. Nacho cheese.

[Tyler]

You could have. You could have let that slide. I wouldn't have thought.

[Ryan]

Well, that's what I'm saying.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I forgot about Taco John's because we had that weird cold snap where they were here.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Now they're back. They just showed up in town again.

[Tyler]

I mean, sticking in the realm of potatoes. I have to take McDonald's french fries next.

[Miles]

I hate you.

[Tyler]

I have to.

[Ryan]

That was my shirt.

[Miles]

I was gonna go one. I was gonna go 12 McDonald's.

[Tyler]

Yeah, that. My 12 were Diet Coke French fries. So we had the same one, too. Similar draft boards. Over here.

[Jared]

I'll go Culver's Double Butter Burger. And then.

[Miles]

No, that's it. Oh, yeah, sorry. You don't get to bundle a double. You already. You already did. You already bundled two patties together.

[Jared]

And then I'll do five. Guys fries. Cajun fries.

[Miles]

You could have got that in the 28th round.

[Jared]

I like them.

[Ryan]

You could have got it late. Jared.

[Tyler]

Jared's draft strategy is just follow his heart.

[Jared]

What I'm hungry for right now.

[Tyler]

You did scare me because my number two pick. Pick is Culver's Root Beer.

[Jared]

Good pick.

[Miles]

All right.

[Jared]

Good pick. Could have got.

[Miles]

Yeah, I guess we're kind of drafting a meal is what we should be doing.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that's. That's kind of what I'm doing again. I'll go with the Taco Bell crunchwrap Supreme.

[Jared]

That's a good pick.

[Tyler]

That's a great.

[Miles]

Is that the one? That is a sort that's, like, folded. You're like a hexagon.

[Jared]

It's crunchy.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

That was close. That was close.

[Tyler]

Because now we know Miles is going T Bell.

[Miles]

I got a T. Bell item on I'd like to draft next.

[Ryan]

I know. I know what you're going with.

[Miles]

Anything else to say about the Country App Supreme?

[Ryan]

I don't think I've ordered anything else from Taco Bell since I could drive myself there.

[Miles]

I went through a Crunch Wrap supreme phase.

[Ryan]

I get one every. Every single time when I was a

[Miles]

kid, then I grew up.

[Ryan]

You know, some. Sometimes you just wish you were a

[Miles]

kid again just for no reason. All right, for my next pick, I'm gonna go spicy Chick Fil A sandwich.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Miles]

You had Chick Fil A on yours.

[Tyler]

It wasn't the spicy one. I was just gonna.

[Miles]

It's just A chicken sandwich from.

[Tyler]

Yep.

[Miles]

And then from Taco Bell. I would like to pick a Cheesy Gordita crunch.

[Ryan]

Exactly right where you were going.

[Miles]

I can. I could slurp down a cheesy gordita crunch with the best of them.

[Tyler]

Miles, we have the exact same fast food taste buds.

[Miles]

I don't love that. Yeah, I don't love that.

[Ryan]

Cheesy gordita crunch.

[Tyler]

Yeah, it's. It's the one with, like, the thick tortilla chalupa deal on the outside, the

[Miles]

soft tortilla with a hard. With cheese in the middle. And then it's got the, like, sauce in there.

[Tyler]

Yeah, that. That. That spicy ranch or whatever it is in there. Phenomenal.

[Ryan]

Would you guys stick. Would. Would you beg. Beg to say you'd stick your. In it?

[Tyler]

No, it's too spicy. It would burn.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

The condom on, though.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Protected. Protected sex.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

I'm at a loss now.

[Miles]

I. I would. I would. I would do. What Tyler's been doing, jerking off lately is just to put a condom on.

[Tyler]

Can't take any chances.

[Jared]

Or just use the chick Fil A, like, aluminum bag and put that over your deck.

[Tyler]

Y.

[Miles]

Something like that. I also got a. I got a few sheep skin condoms, sheep intestine condoms in my trunk, mostly because I just don't want to get my truck dirty.

[Jared]

Yeah. Makes sense.

[Miles]

All right, Ryan, you're up. You got this, Ryan. The further. They're. Actually, the further we get into this, it's like the more items are popping into my head. Do you know what I mean?

[Ryan]

Yep. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go with the Culver's concrete mixer.

[Jared]

That's a good one on my list.

[Tyler]

Yep.

[Miles]

I guess. Didn't even think about desserts.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

I'm trying to build.

[Miles]

Actually, I would have picked the Culver's butter burger if it would have been available.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I'm. I'm gonna go with a. A Dairy Queen chicken strip basketball.

[Jared]

It.

[Miles]

I would pick that just for the toast. I almost picked just toast fire.

[Ryan]

Tyler's got double fries on his draft now, though.

[Tyler]

Yeah, that's all right. That's all right.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean, that's a pretty hefty bundle you chose.

[Tyler]

Hey. I mean, I had a lot of carbs. You can't just order the toast. It's not on the menu, so. It's not a menu item. True.

[Ryan]

I wonder. Like, you know, then I should have

[Miles]

just went to just the value menu meal for all of it.

[Jared]

It.

[Miles]

I could have. Then I could have Got your Chick Fil A fries. And the sandwich should have. And the cinnamon twists with my cheesy gordita crunch.

[Tyler]

Yeah, you could do like cheese. There's a cheesy gordita crunch box that also includes a quesarito.

[Miles]

Yeah, just. I'll. I'll change. I'll bundle that.

[Tyler]

You can't post. You can't change.

[Ryan]

They're still sneaky.

[Miles]

I got the first pick. I get to make up any rules I want.

[Ryan]

There is a sneaky.

[Tyler]

Did Jared did say that you are

[Miles]

God as and as first. First picker in this, I choose it. I get first pick. In all drafts after this, they didn't like first pick. Now I do. I love the power. It's gone to my head.

[Jared]

Miles in charge.

[Miles]

Miles in charge. The power is immediately gone to my head.

[Ryan]

You know how you can order. You can order like a gallon of Chick Fil A lemonade at Chick Fil A. Or you can order like a this big thing of sauce. Whatever. Do you think you. If you went to DQ and asked, can I get a loaf of your bread? You think they'd sell it to you?

[Tyler]

Maybe.

[Miles]

Maybe you should try it. I used to buy just like, I go and I get like a blizzard. And then I'd be like, hey, I just want to pay for some toast.

[Ryan]

Really?

[Miles]

And then they would charge me like 50 cents for toast.

[Ryan]

That's sick.

[Miles]

Because they, like, are like, we don't know how to charge this because no one's ever asked that to us ever, in the history of Dairy Queen.

[Ryan]

I mean, that's kind of sick.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So wait, what did you pick?

[Tyler]

Concrete mixer. Right.

[Miles]

Concrete mixer.

[Tyler]

Chicken strip basket.

[Jared]

DQ Blizzard. Yeah.

[Tyler]

Great pick. Oh, yeah.

[Jared]

You're.

[Tyler]

Again, sorry.

[Ryan]

There is a sneaky good taco fast food place. Dessert.

[Tyler]

I know, and I'm taking it. Next. Go ahead.

[Jared]

Well, no, I'm up.

[Tyler]

Well, unless Jared takes it from me

[Ryan]

now, I won't do it.

[Jared]

It's a panic pick. I'm debating between two of them.

[Ryan]

Do it. Screw Tyler over.

[Miles]

Just which ones are you debating between?

[Jared]

Should I tell you? I don't know if I want to tell you.

[Tyler]

Why don't tell them.

[Ryan]

Well, you get to pick one of them. The other one.

[Jared]

Yeah, I'll tell you. I'm debating between.

[Miles]

This is your last pick.

[Jared]

I'm debating between Arby's curly fries and Taco Bell Baja Blast.

[Ryan]

Okay. And neither of those are Take the Blast.

[Miles]

Honestly. We'll take the blast.

[Ryan]

We'll give you both of them.

[Miles]

Yeah, you can bundle those together. We don't care because we're not first picker.

[Tyler]

You do.

[Miles]

Yeah. You bundle. You get both of those. Take them.

[Jared]

All right.

[Miles]

I don't care.

[Jared]

Awesome.

[Tyler]

All right, I've got my side, my drink, my meal for my dessert.

[Ryan]

Do it.

[Tyler]

I don't know if people know about this.

[Jared]

Do it, dude.

[Tyler]

Taco Bell Cinnabon Delights.

[Ryan]

That's not what I was thinking.

[Tyler]

They're.

[Ryan]

You can have it. You can.

[Tyler]

Thanks.

[Miles]

What else do you want? Have that.

[Ryan]

No, we.

[Miles]

No.

[Ryan]

No one was thinking about the churro.

[Tyler]

Yeah, the Cinnabon Delights are way better than the churros.

[Ryan]

Better than Cine Minis from bk.

[Tyler]

Yes. Try them. They're incredible.

[Ryan]

I don't want to try them.

[Tyler]

All right. I think you'd really enjoy them.

[Ryan]

I'm sure I would, but, like, do

[Miles]

you think he was sticking them? Maybe raw dog.

[Tyler]

If Taco Bell has a item, it's the Cinnabon Delights.

[Jared]

Now, Gordita Crunch, like, fits perfect.

[Miles]

You have to bring your own icing, though.

[Tyler]

It's some sort of burrito. It's basically a cheap meat and cheese fleshlight.

[Ryan]

Because Cinnabon's not even a Taco Bell. Like, it's not even, like Taco Bell staple.

[Jared]

Nice and warm.

[Ryan]

Cinnabon's, like, just a separate. They're not Taco Bell exclusive.

[Tyler]

Like churro. It's churro breading filled with Cinnabon icing.

[Jared]

That's.

[Tyler]

It's dipped in brown sugar. Cinnamon.

[Ryan]

Yeah, you could. Yeah, you could stack them minor, I think.

[Jared]

Yeah. The quesarito is probably the most.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah, it's. It's the flashlight of fast food.

[Ryan]

Yeah, We should have had a fast food draft.

[Tyler]

God, I'm keep my family listening to this.

[Miles]

We'll do that on Patreon. We'll do that on Patreon this week. We'll do the. We'll do the. We'll do the fast food draft. What food item would be the best flashlight?

[Ryan]

I'd say.

[Miles]

I don't know if I'll be able to get through that segment.

[Ryan]

McDonald's McFlurry.

[Miles]

I'm during that segment on Patreon this week. I am going to be like Michael Scott in the like.

[Ryan]

Like Spencer's Domino's lava cake.

[Jared]

Yay.

[Tyler]

You burn it.

[Ryan]

That's not fast food.

[Tyler]

There's lava in there.

[Miles]

Save it.

[Ryan]

All right, I got one more pick left. I don't have a drink yet, but I'll go with a W. Cream soda.

[Tyler]

Good.

[Ryan]

B from a W. You can have it.

[Miles]

You can have. You can bundle the cream.

[Jared]

You chose the cream soda.

[Ryan]

Oh, cream soda over root beer. 100%.

[Jared]

Wow.

[Miles]

Crazy move.

[Tyler]

I agree with that take. But it's the unpopular one.

[Ryan]

No, I, Yeah, I, I'm aware of that.

[Jared]

Wow.

[Ryan]

Diet Coke from McDonald's is off the board. So literally doesn't matter what you take for drink after that.

[Miles]

He took a Baja.

[Tyler]

Baja Blast is a good. I know.

[Miles]

It doesn't matter. I would say that's one and two for drinks. Stow.

[Jared]

Yeah, it's special.

[Miles]

Unless you're like, you ever met anyone that's like, that likes Sonic?

[Tyler]

I went to Sonic one time and it was shitty. Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

It's like, you know, like they're supposed to be known for their drinks, but I literally don't know anyone that's ever been like, oh, I love this drink. It's Sonic.

[Ryan]

Like they're freezy their freezies or whatever.

[Miles]

I don't know.

[Ryan]

Well, they come on roller skates though, don't they?

[Tyler]

No. The one time I went, they just walked out to the car.

[Ryan]

We should have done. We should have done do's and don'ts for a first day on the job

[Tyler]

at sauna number one, wear shoes. I don't think they actually do the roller skate thing anymore.

[Miles]

I feel like. So they gotta have someone still doing it. You think?

[Jared]

So they do that up here in the wintertime. Yeah.

[Miles]

Just ice skates.

[Tyler]

Yeah, they just squad the parking lot and put on hockey skates.

[Ryan]

Makes sense.

[Tyler]

People are just running into the kiosk where you order.

[Miles]

They're like, all right, here comes our food. It's some like frozen shavings. Like the shavings like spray up and hit you in the face.

[Tyler]

Where's my super suit Incredibles? Yeah. Frozone skating over to you.

[Miles]

All right, this is my last pick. I'm going to go. Sausage egg McMuffin meal from breakfast. Meal from McDonald's over McGriddle. Down basket. What's the difference?

[Ryan]

That's true. That's very true.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

I only found out after a third round I could pick full meals.

[Ryan]

Yeah. I didn't even register in my mind.

[Tyler]

Over, over McGriddle.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah, I'll take a. I think, I think the. The syrup in the pancake deal is just kind of a gimmick that, you

[Tyler]

know, I dig it. I like this.

[Miles]

This.

[Tyler]

The sweet to complement the sausage.

[Jared]

The syrup, like, get. I don't know, puts a film in my mouth.

[Miles]

Like I would say, okay, let's say ten times. I am eating McDonald's breakfast. Two of those times, I throw in a McGriddle. Okay, sure, sure.

[Ryan]

I'm a biscuit guy.

[Jared]

Biscuits are good.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

I like. I actually like how dry they are because then it makes the orange juice or coffee taste that much better.

[Jared]

Oh, that's a good point.

[Miles]

So, yeah. All right, so for my draft, I have McDonald's Diet Coke, a spicy chicken sandwich meal from. From Chick Fil. A. A cheesy gordita. No. Yeah. Cheesy gordita crunch. No, no, no.

[Tyler]

You took a cheesy gordita crunch.

[Jared]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

Crunch Wrap supreme.

[Jared]

Crunch.

[Miles]

Yeah. There's so many. Yeah. And then the McDonald's breakfast sandwich meal.

[Ryan]

No dessert. You did get first pick. So you can just add a fifth pick on if you want.

[Jared]

I have. I have five picks. You can have a dessert pick.

[Miles]

Okay. I want a fifth pick.

[Jared]

I think first pick.

[Miles]

I think. I think I have to go back to my domino Dan roots. Does domino's count?

[Tyler]

No, I don't think so.

[Jared]

Fuck.

[Ryan]

No.

[Miles]

Dessert. Dessert. Just. Just. Just crumble cookie sound. Just.

[Tyler]

That's not fast food.

[Ryan]

They do have a drive through.

[Jared]

I'm not the menu and you.

[Miles]

And it. It's instantly done.

[Tyler]

I get. I've never been inside a crumble cookie.

[Jared]

Same.

[Tyler]

I've only ever ordered it. I know. I've ever. Only ever had it delivered.

[Miles]

It has a drive through and you don't get to pick in. Buy ingredients.

[Ryan]

I'd say that's fast food.

[Miles]

I'll go crumble cookie.

[Ryan]

Yeah, It.

[Jared]

Why not?

[Tyler]

Oh, all of it.

[Jared]

Dessert.

[Ryan]

What? What? Jared, What'd you miss?

[Miles]

A six pack of.

[Jared]

You should have done.

[Tyler]

You gotta pick an item.

[Miles]

Just whatever they got.

[Jared]

Krispy Kreme glazed donut would have been a good one.

[Miles]

Nah, dude, I. I'm. I used to love Krispy Kreme. I don't anymore.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Tyler]

All right.

[Miles]

Bad experience. No, I'm just kidding. I had a Krispy Kreme cake as a kid. And what. And what you're thinking is like, as a cake. No. My mom just took Krispy Kreme donuts and stacked them in the pyramid shape and then put candles and donuts. It's kind of sick. Yeah, it's kind of sick.

[Tyler]

Donut tower.

[Jared]

That's why you're obsessed with the pyramids.

[Miles]

That's why I'm so. Pyramids. That's why we had donuts at our wedding as the dessert.

[Ryan]

You got any of them left?

[Miles]

And it. It bodes really well for the fast food dream draft. Little Teuts. It's Drive thru depends on if you want a Creill Bismar or not.

[Ryan]

Save it. That's tomorrow.

[Tyler]

Like instead of buy. You can buy hamburger buns not cut. You can buy the Boston Cream Fills, not creamed.

[Ryan]

You can buy Krispy Kremes without.

[Miles]

I just want it. I want it pre hold. I don't want it pre filled.

[Ryan]

Got it.

[Tyler]

I'll fill them myself.

[Ryan]

You want the glaze on the side? You're gonna add your own glaze?

[Miles]

I want to bring my own glaze. This. This is. This could be the worst decision we've ever made on this podcast. Doing a fast food draft.

[Jared]

I like fast food drafts.

[Miles]

I had a food Fleshlight draft.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

All right. I had Potato Olay's, Taco John's with nacho cheese crunchwrap supreme, concrete mixer, a W cream soda.

[Miles]

Yours is definitely the strangest.

[Ryan]

Potentially one of the best though.

[Tyler]

You did dip around B. I'd give

[Ryan]

it a B plus if I'd have had Diet Coke on there. I think I'd. I'm the winner.

[Tyler]

Yeah. I had McDonald's french fries, Culver's Root beer, Dairy Queen Chicken strip basket and Cinnabon Delights from Taco Bell.

[Ryan]

That's good. That's pretty good.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Would you for a drink?

[Tyler]

Culver's Root beer,

[Jared]

Culver Butter Burger, Double Butter Burger, five guys fries, DQ Blizzard Baja Blast and Arby's curly fries.

[Ryan]

I got five honorable mention pick. Yeah, you got five.

[Jared]

No, I got five. No other.

[Ryan]

That's true.

[Miles]

It was nothing like he just got it because he just picked drafted so badly.

[Ryan]

You know what you should do for future drafts? Like you can withhold a pick from a draft to add one to the next draft.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

But you don't know what the next draft's gonna be. So we don't. You know, it's a gamble. It is a gamble.

[Jared]

You could stack up so you could get like 10 picks. Yeah.

[Tyler]

These drafts are already complicated enough.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Let's throw an extra layer on it though.

[Miles]

Well, let's run it back there. Let's run it by the guy that's running the show here. So what do you want now? You want to be. You want to be able to bank picks for later?

[Jared]

Yeah. So you can stack them.

[Ryan]

Withhold picks in. In present day draft to get future.

[Miles]

You can only bank up to two picks and otherwise it's just. Then you're just refusing to draft.

[Ryan]

All right, well, I'm gonna release concrete mixer and a W cream soda so that tomorrow I can get two extra picks. Release on waivers you already drafted.

[Miles]

So I can pick up what on? I can pick up concrete mixer. Yeah, I'll pick them up. And what was the other thing you released?

[Ryan]

A W. Cream soda.

[Miles]

Okay, so you have. I don't want that one.

[Jared]

But stuck out way.

[Miles]

He's got two players.

[Ryan]

I'll have six tomorrow.

[Miles]

That's. Don't take the bait. That it?

[Jared]

Jared, any Dave updates?

[Miles]

Okay, so Dave is not posted on Facebook since July 7, which is sad. But I did do some recon this weekend and found out that the reason why he's on a little hiatus is because he got into a little bit of trouble. He was not what you think this is. Stick with me. It's not the trouble you think. Not with the law.

[Tyler]

He.

[Miles]

I mean it's just in true Dave fashion, he was running his mouth and got in trouble about it. So he was helping teach some guy how to trap and apparently he basically like sub tweeted about this guy he was teaching to trap. Like, basically was like, I wish my students would learn this faster. Pay attention. Like basically just. Just basically just complaining about the person he was teaching to trap on on Facebook. And that guy's daughter saw it and told him about it. And so Dave was like, oh, all Facebook does is get me in trouble. So I'm. I can't post anything anymore. So that update is that this could be a very short lived thing. Damn that in the matter of like three months, Dave already got in trouble on Facebook and is decided he's taking a break.

[Jared]

It's like Aaron Rogers tearing his Achilles right when he started playing for the Jets.

[Miles]

It's essentially what's happened.

[Ryan]

Yeah, he'll be a. Roger's back though.

[Jared]

That's true.

[Ryan]

He came back.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I mean I. If I know Dave and his impulse control, he'll be back.

[Jared]

That's good.

[Ryan]

He's just in the Facebook clink for a bit.

[Jared]

Facebook jail.

[Miles]

So that's Update sucks. But damn good update.

[Ryan]

I'll keep updated.

[Miles]

He went from confronting people about accepting their friend request to getting in trouble for something that he posted.

[Jared]

He got trapped.

[Miles]

He got trapped.

[Jared]

Yeah. Ironic.

[Miles]

You got a fun fact?

[Tyler]

Yeah. Space.

[Miles]

Oh, this is a great start. This is a great start, Tyler.

[Tyler]

Okay. My phone wasn't turning on. Space is roughly only 62 vertical miles away.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

So when you think about it like a drive to Detroit Lakes from here,

[Ryan]

you just drove straight up.

[Tyler]

If you could drive straight up. Take you an hour.

[Miles]

Yeah. Going 60 miles an hour.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

62 miles an hour.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean I guess I knew that, but I didn't know the exact number.

[Tyler]

Yeah, that's the average number. It varies obviously, on elevation, but 62

[Ryan]

miles straight up and plans. Commercial planes usually fly at, what, 30,000ft, something like that.

[Miles]

So that's like six miles up.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Tyler]

Yeah. So we'd have.

[Ryan]

We have 50 some miles ago.

[Tyler]

So, like, actual, like some Navy pilots or Air Force pilots that cross that threshold will get their astronaut badges.

[Ryan]

Interesting.

[Miles]

Cross what threshold? The.

[Tyler]

The Carmen line. But both the A's have a little accent above it, so I don't know how to pronounce that.

[Miles]

Oh, man.

[Tyler]

Yeah. U.S. military. Yeah. Yeah.

[Miles]

That is. That is a wild perspective. So we're only six miles up in an airplane, and we. That's only a tenth of the way to space.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And it feels like you're so high up.

[Jared]

Up.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Is just a weird concept because the whole. When I realized it was like an hour drive, it just. That doesn't feel far when you're on land. No, but you think about how far space is. You're, like, so far away.

[Jared]

Yeah. I would take, like a thousand miles or whatever, Right?

[Ryan]

It's true.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean, I guess I had the opposite perspective. I thought it would be closer than 62 miles, considering how high up being in an airplane feels. It feels like not that much farther in. You're in space, but it's still another, you know.

[Ryan]

Do you know how far up you have to be miles to be able to start seeing dark? Like, if you're looking straight up in the air while traveling straight up, do you got to be, like 50 miles up to be able to start seeing some dark?

[Tyler]

I will Google it. I don't know.

[Miles]

Like, in the daytime.

[Ryan]

Yes.

[Miles]

I don't know. That's a very niche question that I'm on Tyler's side. There's no way he could foresaw that question for sure.

[Tyler]

To see a fully dark black sky like the one in space, you must reach an altitude of roughly 30 to 62 miles. So you start losing.

[Ryan]

30 miles is about when you could

[Tyler]

potentially, I guess halfway if Google AI enters. Interpreted my question correctly. Yeah. I said, how far up in the atmosphere do you need to fly before you start to see dark?

[Miles]

Interesting. Well, is that it?

[Tyler]

Yep.

[Miles]

Well, guys, thanks for tuning in to another episode of you Bet yout Radio. Have a great week. We'll see you next one. Bring it in.

[Tyler]

We're done.

[Miles]

Oh, you betcha.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Doing the 999 challenge this weekend. Should. Should my tactic be for it?

[Miles]

So 999 is nine hot dogs, nine buckets of popcorn, and nine beers. What is it?

[Ryan]

Nine dogs, nine bruskies in nine innings of ball?

[Miles]

I. Yeah. I mean,

[Ryan]

nine popcorn tricks to get nine hand jobs, which.

[Miles]

That's tough.

[Ryan]

You hope. You hope there's runs, you know.

[Miles]

You know, they don't all have to be hand jobs.

[Tyler]

Know.

[Ryan]

That's true. That's very true.

[Miles]

So, okay, so nine corn dogs, nine beers, nine hot dogs, nine beers and nine innings of baseball.

[Jared]

You got it.

[Miles]

And did you actually attempt that ever?

[Jared]

Me?

[Miles]

Yeah. Remember you.

[Jared]

I joked that. I was.

[Miles]

You joked.

[Ryan]

Okay. Yeah.

[Miles]

So I think. I mean, nine innings of baseball is easy. You just got to show up on time and leave after it's done.

[Ryan]

Correct.

[Miles]

So you got.

[Jared]

That's good.

[Miles]

So you got that one under wrap. That one's probably the easiest, I would say.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

It'd be so funny. Like, his team's losing, like, 15 to 0, and he's like, still got to just stick it out for nine innings

[Jared]

all they want in the stands. Yeah. Well.

[Ryan]

And he's. It's going to take a while to get out of the parking lot, too. Too. Because he's not leaving early.

[Miles]

I think what's tough is it's like the hot dogs. You definitely got to make sure you're buying them. Well, the question is, do you buy all nine at once? So what's going to be easier to do? Eating a warm or hot. Even hot hot dog. That gonna be easier or, you know, room temp or, you know, a cold dog? Does that go down easier?

[Jared]

I would do four to start or five to start, and then like fourth or fifth inning, go refill.

[Miles]

And do you think that pacing yourself is better? You're the hot dog guy. You got second place this year.

[Jared]

Actually, probably not.

[Miles]

So you go ham right away, eat five right away.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

Then drink beers in between and then just gut out another four.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

And like the, you know, top of the ninth.

[Jared]

Yeah. Try to get two dogs in the first inning, if that's possible.

[Miles]

I mean, I can get two dogs done in a minute and a half.

[Jared]

Yeah. Get out of pace.

[Ryan]

And do you kind of want to. Do you want to, like.

[Miles]

You're right, because getting five dogs done as fast as possible. Get it before your belly sends the message to your brain that you're full.

[Ryan]

Well, okay. And that. That's what I was going to get to it also, do you want to, like, maybe slam a couple beers before the hot dogs? Because if you're really full of hot dogs, it's going to be tough to drink brewskis.

[Jared]

That's not a bad.

[Miles]

So you might want to slam two beers to start. God, it's a lot.

[Ryan]

I think we also need.

[Miles]

It's a lot. Well, and how big are the beers? We talking like, are we talking stadium, like 24 ounce beers?

[Jared]

I would say it's 16 ounce beers.

[Ryan]

I think we need tap beers.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Because the 12 ounce tap beers, if

[Jared]

they have them sometimes, usually it's a little bigger than that.

[Ryan]

The fl. Because the flow down the gullet of a tap beer is much better than it out of a can.

[Jared]

Scope out the area, see if you can find a 12 ounce anything that'll make your life a lot easier. And I feel like that counts. It's not really cheating.

[Miles]

I mean, that's a beer, right?

[Ryan]

That's a brusky.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And are you. Let's say he can only get 16 ounce beers. Are you counting that as one and a third beers?

[Jared]

That's one beer.

[Miles]

Oh, that's tough.

[Jared]

You gotta do it that way because

[Miles]

then you really only have to do, you know.

[Jared]

Yeah, I know. But. Yeah, that's the way.

[Miles]

I know, I know, I know.

[Jared]

Not the real one. And then the condiments, I would just do a little bit of mustard. Don't go heavy on the condiments. Or plain.

[Miles]

I mean.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Stay away from relish and onions.

[Jared]

Yeah. Plus your breath's gonna stink.

[Miles]

And I also think it's important that you like take the hot dog out of the tin foil and like, like scrunch. Get the bun as compacted as possible.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You know what I mean? Like you take a piece of bread and you mush it together and it stays like that.

[Ryan]

Sure.

[Miles]

Do that with the bun.

[Tyler]

You.

[Miles]

You want it to be as little as possible going down.

[Ryan]

Agreed.

[Miles]

A fluffy bun, mentally, is way harder than something that's like a pancake.

[Ryan]

Yeah. And don't do foot long dogs either.

[Jared]

Just do regular dogs and always have the dog. Always have a dog and a beer in your hand. Never be hand. It should be Edward.

[Miles]

40 hands basically never be empty handed. Well, so here's what Jared, let's say. You're saying hammer five hot dogs right away. You could have two beers. Five hot dogs done by the end of the second inning.

[Jared]

Right.

[Miles]

I think you almost mentally then need to just take a break, go for a walk and just do beers for a little while. Maybe do a walk.

[Jared]

Definitely.

[Miles]

And then be like, all right, I'm gearing up to end this challenge strong. 7th inning stretch is when I start hammering dogs again. So basically you got like five innings to recover.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Ryan]

Well, dude, what do you guys think about doing like five to seven brewskis before you even touch a dog?

[Miles]

Because drinking it does make you hungry

[Ryan]

because you're gonna kind of get the, the munchies.

[Miles]

And it's probably easier to put dogs down when you got a little buzz going.

[Ryan]

Exactly.

[Jared]

Yep. I'd say, yeah. At least £3.

[Miles]

I mean, honestly, if you just smoke before the game, you're gonna do this no problem.

[Ryan]

100, you might get really faded and. And your buddy's driving you home for sure.

[Miles]

Well, you're driving home regardless.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ryan]

But yeah, I think if.

[Miles]

Yes, I'd say smoke before.

[Jared]

Don't skip lunch that day.

[Miles]

Skip lunch, smoke, go to the game.

[Ryan]

I think go six beers before your first dog.

[Jared]

I think go seven beers.

[Miles]

I maybe go nine beers before your first dog. I go 10 beers before your first dog.

[Ryan]

Well, because if you go six, you can use the last three brewskis to wash the dogs down.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

So then you're kind of killing two birds with one stone. The last three beers.

[Jared]

And definitely walk around the stadium. That's gonna help with digestion and not make you feel so full.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

And plus you burn a few calories. Not a lot.

[Ryan]

And if, if it's like a minor league game and you can get onto the field for between inning entertainment, that's also some good calorie burning right there. They might have the fucking. You might have to race the Iceman or whatever around the outfield, get some exercise in.

[Miles]

That's like the last thing I want to do with five hot dogs and five beers in me.

[Ryan]

But never be empty handed. So have a dog down on the field.

[Jared]

Maybe after the game, run the bases with the kids.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Instead. Yeah. Instead of winning a 25 gift card to Buffalo Wild Wing Steve, you can exchange it for hot dog credit at the stadium. Keep that cost down because I'm starting to do the math on how much this is going to cost you.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

There's 15 beers at the stadium.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Times nine and hot dogs are 10 bucks.

[Jared]

Bring your checkbook.

[Miles]

Yeah. Jesus. We're talking. This game is like a $250 challenge.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

That's without tickets.

[Ryan]

Minor league team in town. Mondays are dollar dog night.

[Miles]

Go to Monday so see if they

[Ryan]

got a dollar dog night. So I mean, it sounds like you already got the game pinned down and as to which one you're gonna go to.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

So yeah, we might be out of luck there. Shaver cooter Wait, that sucks too, because he's not even gonna have enough room in his tummy for dipping dots either. That's a shame game. But it'll save you 11 bucks for

[Miles]

a 4 ouncer and make sure you

[Jared]

know what time they, like, cut off beer sales.

[Miles]

Yeah, I was thinking about that, actually.

[Jared]

It's. Be vigilant about that.

[Miles]

So I take the Bring a buddy, too.

[Jared]

Yes.

[Miles]

And have them encouraging you.

[Ryan]

Can you imagine if you just went to the game by yourself?

[Miles]

They did it to do this. Make new friends, call an Uber.

[Ryan]

You're just. You're the last one in the. You're the last one at the stadium just waiting for your room.

[Miles]

And the whole time you're smashing beers, you got to just be saying out loud, let's start a snake.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Let's start a cup snake.

[Jared]

I got five already.

[Miles]

I got five. I'm. I'm starting a cup snake. Can I have yours, bro?

[Ryan]

Or what you got to do is you got to just keep stacking cups. Keep drinking out of. Drinking out of your stack so people know how many beers you've crushed.

[Jared]

And Snapchat each one when you're done. Like, that's number one, that's number two,

[Ryan]

and people love that. You can update Friday night highlights with this chat during this challenge. That's okay.

[Jared]

You're giving them permission.

[Ryan]

I am.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

Go live on TikTok, too, and then maybe you can get some galaxies out of it.

[Ryan]

It galaxies equal free dogs.

[Miles]

Yeah. Guys, if you want more, you bet your radio. You got to check out our Patreon. You got to go to patreon.com you betch radio, or look us up on the app. And we have hundreds of hours of other episodes on there that you can't get unless you're signed up. So you got to check us out on Patreon. You bet your radio, baby.