Top 3 Manliest Chores 🎙 #304

Summary

Summary of "Top 3 Manliest Chores 🎙 #304" from You Betcha Radio

Release Date: December 11, 2024
Hosts: Miles ("the You Betcha Guy"), Ryan ("the T-shirt Guy"), Tyler, and Jared

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1. Unearthing the Past: Ryan's High School Basketball Tape

The episode kicks off with Miles sharing an amusing discovery of old high school basketball footage featuring Ryan. The hosts engage in playful skepticism about Ryan's athletic prowess during his school days.

• Miles: "I'm gonna start this podcast off hot." [00:24]
• Ryan: "Are you shitting me?" [00:58]

Ryan humorously downplays his performance, emphasizing his role as a spot-up shooter rather than a star player. The segment sets a light-hearted tone, highlighting the camaraderie among the hosts.

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2. Adventures in the Wild: The Hunting Trip and the Creepy Hotel

The conversation transitions to a recount of a recent hunting trip where the group stayed at a notoriously sketchy hotel. Miles narrates their decision to book despite alarming Google reviews about bedbugs, leading to a series of unsettling experiences.

• Miles: "This is the same hotel that we read all the Google reviews to. A lot of bedbugs, talk whatnot." [07:16]

They delve into eerie tales, including the hotel's purported ritual sacrifices involving lambs—a claim that Jared finds both bizarre and concerning.

• Jared: "He's got his hand on the face usually." [03:12]

The hosts share their strategies to mitigate potential bedbug infestations, such as packing personal bedding and sanitizing their room upon arrival. Despite the eerie backdrop, the group's resilience and humor shine through as they recount their experiences.

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3. Keeping it Moving: Jared's House Relocation

Jared shares his recent move to a new house an hour away, highlighting the surprising support he received from friends and family. Unlike his previous moves where assistance was scarce, this relocation saw a surge in helpful hands, underscoring the communal spirit among the hosts.

• Jared: "I feel like I moved like five miles the last time I moved, and people less people helped than this time." [29:17]
• Miles: "I'll do it this time. And then, like, he can't hold it over my head forever. That didn't help." [29:23]

The move serves as a segue into discussions about the logistics and challenges of relocating, interspersed with humorous anecdotes about the types of food rewards provided to helpers—ranging from bagel bites to burnt pizzas.

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4. Manly Matters: Top 3 Manliest Chores

The core segment of the episode revolves around each host presenting their top three manly chores. This segment sparks a blend of earnest debate and comedic exchanges as they defend their choices.

Miles' Manliest Chores

1. Changing the Air Filter:
   Miles appreciates the chore for its infrequency and the satisfaction of comparing dusty old filters with fresh ones.
   • Miles: "There's just something so satisfying about getting that strap nice and tight, saying, it's not going anywhere." [59:31]
2. Moving Items with Straps:
   He enjoys the meticulous process of strapping items securely during a move, finding a sense of accomplishment in the task.
   • Miles: "There's just something so satisfying about getting that strap nice and tight." [59:31]
3. Packing and Unpacking Hunting Gear:
   The ritual of organizing and preparing hunting gear brings Miles a sense of readiness and purpose.
   • Miles: "I love going down in my basement where all my hunting gear is, my gun safe is." [67:29]

Ryan's Manliest Chores

1. Resetting Mousetraps:
   Ryan finds this chore satisfying as it combines problem-solving with the primal act of trapping.
   • Ryan: "My manliest chore that men can do is cleaning guns." [72:00]
2. Cleaning Guns:
   He emphasizes the meticulous nature of gun maintenance, finding it both practical and inherently manly.
   • Ryan: "It's the manliest chore on my list is clean cleaning guns." [72:00]
3. Cutting Trees with a Chainsaw:
   Ryan revels in the power and precision required to operate a chainsaw, viewing it as an art form.
   • Ryan: "Chains and whips excite me." [75:17]

Jared's Manliest Chores

1. Splitting Wood:
   Despite disliking the chore, Jared values the sense of manliness it imparts.
   • Jared: "Splitting wood's a very manly chore." [47:55]
2. Setting and Resetting Mousetraps:
   Like Ryan, Jared enjoys the tactical aspect of trapping pests.
3. Killing Spiders:
   Responding to domestic pests is both a protective and manly act in Jared's view.
   • Jared: "Killing spiders... it's always because you're coming to the rescue." [63:03]

Tyler's Manliest Chores

1. Replacing Wiper Blades:
   Tyler considers this chore essential and somewhat tricky, adding a layer of skill to its execution.
   • Tyler: "Replacing wiper blades on a vehicle." [65:21]
2. Demolition Projects:
   Using tools like ice scrapers or chainsaws for demolition tasks gives Tyler a sense of accomplishment.
   • Tyler: "Any sort of demolition... cutting down trees with a four-wheeler." [72:49]
3. Extra Demolition Tasks:
   Tyler enjoys the hands-on challenges that demolition tasks present, further cementing their place on his list.

The segment is peppered with humorous exchanges, personal anecdotes, and playful disagreements, enriching the conversational dynamic of the show.

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5. Fun Facts and Historical Nuggets

Interspersed within the main discussions, the hosts share intriguing and often humorous facts, adding educational value and entertainment.

• Tyler: "During prohibition, moonshiners would wear cow shoes. The footwear left hoof prints instead of footprints, helping distillers and smugglers evade the police." [75:45]
• Tyler: "The Russian team derived late to the 1908 London Olympics due to a difference between the Julian and the Gregorian calendars." [76:00]

These facts serve as amusing interludes, showcasing the hosts' wide-ranging knowledge and knack for trivia.

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6. Wife Interactions: Perspectives from the Other Side

The episode includes segments featuring the wives of the hosts, providing a balanced view and showcasing teamwork in domestic settings.

• Megan: "Grill. Hell yeah." [83:35]

The wives discuss the chores they appreciate most from their husbands, such as grilling and handling housework, further highlighting the podcast's theme of man culture and domestic roles.

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7. Closing Banter and Final Thoughts

As the episode wraps up, the hosts engage in light-hearted banter, reflecting on the discussions and sharing final humorous insights.

• Miles: "May your chores be mainly. And may your hotels be free of lambs and goats and bedbugs and sheep." [80:46]

This closing remark ties back to their earlier stories, leaving listeners with a memorable and humorous takeaway.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Miles on Starting Hot: "I'm gonna start this podcast off hot." [00:24]
• Ryan's Doubt on His Performance: "Are you shitting me?" [00:58]
• Miles on Challenging Google Reviews: "This is the same hotel that we read all the Google reviews to. A lot of bedbugs, talk whatnot." [07:16]
• Ryan on Trapping Skills: "I'm totally with that. I'll let him stay close, let him stay in it. But I'm not letting them win." [64:17]
• Tyler's Fun Fact on Moonshiners: "During prohibition, moonshiners would wear cow shoes..." [75:45]
• Closing Wish by Miles: "May your chores be mainly. And may your hotels be free of lambs and goats and bedbugs and sheep." [80:46]

These quotes encapsulate the essence of the episode, reflecting both the informative and entertaining aspects of the hosts' conversations.

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This detailed summary aims to provide a comprehensive overview of Episode #304, capturing the humor, camaraderie, and insightful discussions among the hosts of You Betcha Radio. Whether you're a long-time listener or new to the podcast, this episode offers a blend of nostalgia, practical advice, and genuine Midwest charm.

Transcript

[Miles]

Welcome back, everybody, to another episode of the you betcha radio podcast, the coldest podcast in all the Midwest. I'm Miles, you betcha guy here with Ryan the T shirt guy. We are presented by Ice Mountain and we are here.

[Ryan]

Yes, yes, we are.

[Miles]

And live. We're back, folks. And I actually, I'm gonna. I'm gonna start this podcast off hot.

[Jared]

Oh, really?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Better than cold, I would. I would guess.

[Miles]

Yeah. Yeah, this is gonna be a hot start. And so, Jared, you have what you need to prepped and ready to go?

[Tyler]

Yep.

[Miles]

So I listen to this. I found some old high school basketball tape of Ryan.

[Jared]

Hell yeah. Hell yeah.

[Miles]

I found some old. Wait, wait, wait.

[Jared]

This. This could be the chance where we finally find out if Ryan Road pine or actually played.

[Ryan]

Are you shitting me?

[Miles]

I'm not shitting you.

[Tyler]

It's old.

[Ryan]

Did you find it out? Were you.

[Miles]

I can't reveal my sources, Ryan. I can't review my sending you this.

[Jared]

I'm excited.

[Ryan]

Well, also, what game was it that matters.

[Miles]

You'll see. Are you a little.

[Ryan]

No, I'm not ready.

[Miles]

Are you nervous?

[Ryan]

I mean, what do I. I can't win in this situation.

[Miles]

What do you mean?

[Jared]

You could. You could put up a double double.

[Ryan]

I think I may put one of those up.

[Jared]

Maybe that's this tape.

[Ryan]

I wasn't re. I mean, I was. I was leaking out the sides. I wasn't getting in for offensive boards. I got a couple.

[Jared]

I don't know, basketball. I just said double double.

[Ryan]

I was a spot up shooter. I was purely a spot up shooter. If someone made me put the ball on the floor, there's.

[Tyler]

There's no way. You've gotten a double duck level. No chance.

[Miles]

Well, let's let the.

[Ryan]

No, there isn't.

[Miles]

Let's let the tape do the talking. Ryan, get comfortable.

[Jared]

How long?

[Ryan]

Oh, let's watch Tyler some of his old wrestling. It's like he won all of them. I got nothing to win here.

[Jared]

I lost nine times.

[Miles]

So get comfortable, Ryan. Yeah, comfortable.

[Jared]

Those are the only ones I remember.

[Miles]

All right, here we go. This is the day. And if you're listening to this, we'll describe it to you after.

[Tyler]

Do you want the audio or.

[Miles]

No, it doesn't matter.

[Ryan]

Play the audio.

[Miles]

And for those watching, just enjoy.

[Ryan]

Here we go.

[Miles]

There he is.

[Ryan]

I was like, wait, that's not me. And now I. Now I understand. Now I understand.

[Jared]

I mean, the problem is, is it kind of looks like you from the side.

[Ryan]

Yeah, except he's got a piss. You can tell because he's got his hand.

[Miles]

I was really hoping you were going to be sitting like that because you sit like that quite a bit all the time.

[Ryan]

All the time. Yeah. I mean, it's like.

[Jared]

Hand up too.

[Ryan]

The hand is on the face usually. And yes, I do sit like this quite often.

[Miles]

So for those that are just listening, it is a video of some high school basketball player at the end of the bench sitting with his legs crossed like Ryan normally does. And the caption just says, y'all think he playing tonight? Because this kid is settled into the end of the bench. I'm surprised he's even got his warm up shirt off, to be honest.

[Tyler]

He got too warm. That's why I took it off.

[Miles]

I, you know, I got you, dude. You thought it was gonna be.

[Ryan]

I did, yeah.

[Jared]

I thought for sure it was gonna be.

[Ryan]

I thought it was gonna. I thought, I thought, I thought. I honestly thought a Patreon patron, a Patreon member had pulled tape and like, put together like a full, like, only me. Not necessarily highlight reel. We'll call it highlight reel.

[Jared]

A real.

[Miles]

It's just a light reel.

[Ryan]

Yeah, Just video to make me look worse. Just to make me look bad. Even though, like, you know, I was averaging eight, eight off the bench, eight minutes, six man of the year, eight.

[Miles]

Towel twirls and he had a. He had a double, double 12 towel twirls and 10 high fives.

[Ryan]

That was good. That was creative. There's been. Over the years, there's a lot of people who have commented on the way I sit. It may be a little feminine. And again, Patreon Wives episode, everyone's like, Megan, Ryan, sit the exact same way.

[Miles]

Not great news for you. Not great news.

[Ryan]

But I also, I just. I don't really care what other people think. I'm more. I'm more comfort over caring.

[Jared]

I would give you more shit if you change the way you sat because of those comments than I would give you shit for the way you sit.

[Ryan]

Oh, there's no changing how I'm going to sit. Also, if any of. If anyone who is like, oh, my God, I can't believe this is like that. If you sat in my chair for a day. I'm talking this chair underneath me right now.

[Jared]

In my chair.

[Ryan]

You would get as comfy said a.

[Miles]

Podcast in my chair.

[Ryan]

Yeah, you'd get as cozy wozy as you could get in this chair.

[Miles]

I think the funniest thing of this whole thing was I didn't even find this video and. And found it. I figured we were laying in Bed. And she shows it to me and she just goes, Ryan.

[Ryan]

You know, that's good observation.

[Jared]

This kid has the same haircut as you too.

[Miles]

Yeah, a little bit right away.

[Ryan]

I, I, I did think it was me until I, like, until I digested the black jersey, I never, I don't think I ever wore a black jersey. So.

[Miles]

Still fun. Little goof for you guys. Start off the pod.

[Ryan]

That was good. That was good.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

I'm actually gonna do a deep dive and find some real footage.

[Ryan]

I think, I think you probably could on YouTube.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

If they saw full games on there.

[Jared]

Yet, it'll be some other kids huddle tape that I'll find.

[Ryan]

I don't have basketball huddle highlights. I have baseball ones.

[Jared]

Some other kids will be in the background.

[Ryan]

Yeah, the baseball ones. Yeah.

[Miles]

Yep, yep.

[Ryan]

Okay, well, and for those who don't.

[Miles]

Know what we're talking about, with Ryan's wife sitting the same as him, we finally hit 3,000 patrons. So the Wives episode is up on Patreon. So go to patreon.com you bet your radio you can listen to the wives episode. I haven't listened to it yet. Apparently this week we're going to react to some clips, so we'll be doing that. I haven't watched it yet, but I've heard it's good.

[Jared]

I've seen bits and pieces. I'm excited for everyone to react.

[Miles]

Yeah, so we got that plus all the other episodes and the whole thing. So go check that out on Patreon, folks.

[Ryan]

Hey, also, just I'm looking at the screen over here and you and I are wearing the exact same colors.

[Miles]

The green shirt.

[Jared]

God, you guys, same palette.

[Ryan]

Let's fucking go, dude.

[Miles]

Yeah, sure.

[Tyler]

I was like, I gotta change though.

[Miles]

Yeah, this is a mistake. Burn this when I get home.

[Jared]

I like also I like that vest you're wearing though.

[Miles]

Also. Remember that. We'll get into that. I went pheasant hunting this weekend, me and Ryan did, and we stayed at the hotel.

[Jared]

Hell yeah. So that place still kicking, huh?

[Miles]

So. Oh yeah. Well, I wouldn't know if I'd say kicking death rattle, but this is the same hotel that we read all the Google reviews to. A lot of bedbugs, talk whatnot. So before I went, I decided to see if there's any updated Google reviews. Maybe they had turned over a new leaf. Maybe they'd really tip top shape. The reviews are probably worse than what user is. Actually, there was three reviews from two months ago that were talking about bedbugs. And I shit you not, I Was, you know, before it was like, oh, one guy said that he may have got bedbugs. You're like, isolated incident. And I probably won't even get that room. There's now enough of them on there that I was actually like, am I going to get bedbugs? Like, what are we doing? Maybe we should just rent a camper and park it somewhere.

[Jared]

Yeah, there's not that many rooms. The odds are pretty high.

[Ryan]

I think there's 38 rooms. But upstairs.

[Miles]

Well, yeah. So what's nice, though, is you get, you know, you get there night one and you wake up the next day without any rashes or bug bites or anything like that. Then you're like, your. Your mind is clear.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So that happened to me night one, no weird scratching or itching when I woke up. So I was like, all right, if I was going to get it, I would. I would already have it. But then I found out that. We found out that the person who runs the hotel, according to their religion, they needed to make a sacrifice of a lamb or a sheep.

[Ryan]

One of the two? Yeah.

[Miles]

What?

[Ryan]

Yeah, one of the two.

[Miles]

So the person running this hotel, for their religion, you know, they needed to say lamb. Sacrifice a lamb. So they got like a forklift apparatus and hung a lamb over the dumpster.

[Ryan]

Outside, which is next to the interstate.

[Miles]

And they sacrifice it. Gutted it out, put all the guts in the dumpster.

[Tyler]

I hope so.

[Miles]

Quartered it up. And the lady said that they put all of the quartered up lamb in the bathtub of room 102. And that was my room this weekend. What? So I stayed in the lamb room.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Miles]

Or sheep. I don't know. I don't remember which one it is.

[Tyler]

Do you count sheep sleeping?

[Jared]

Just.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I swear to God. I closed my eyes, I could hear or see sheep. I think it was just the ghost sheep.

[Jared]

This does kind of. It's a small town. It does kind of sound like something the in towners tell the out of towners to fuck with them.

[Miles]

No, they. Any towner we talk about this hotel to. They're not fucking. They're like actually worried about us staying.

[Ryan]

They don't know why we make the choice to stay there.

[Miles]

Like, we've been offered cots in people's basement so we don't have to stay there before. Um, but my argument was, what's different than what we do with deer?

[Jared]

We don't hang over the dumpster next to the interstate or throw them in a tub.

[Miles]

But if your hunting land was next to the Internet, and interstate, you would. And you shot it in a field. You would just gut it right there. Yeah. And then you quarter it up and you go put it in your freezer.

[Jared]

Yeah. And then I wouldn't. I wouldn't rent my freezer out for people to clean their bodies in.

[Ryan]

I think. I think the worst part about it is that they put it into, like, a public. Like a public building where that's getting cleaned. Right. Because there's. I mean, there's. There's plenty of times where, like, if you're cutting up, if you hang a deer in your garage and you're cutting deer up, sometimes you have the garage door open. And so I don't know, it's really. No, that's really no different if someone drives by and see you cutting a deer up, it's the fact that they put it into a room that people in the public could stay in if they stayed at that hotel.

[Miles]

Yeah. But this whole. Knowing this hotel, they probably cleaned the tub good.

[Ryan]

Oh, they disinfectant. I mean, that probably happened years ago.

[Jared]

Honestly, the blood might have got some of the rust off of the tub.

[Miles]

Yeah, Honestly.

[Jared]

Up a little bit.

[Miles]

But also, update on the tub. You don't have to worry in this hotel about the drain being clogged and it filling up with water as you shower anymore, because they just took out the plug. So now the middleman. Yeah. So now, quite literally, there's just a hole at the bottom of the shower with no, like, you know, I don't know what it's called, the little drain stop. Drain stop in there. So they just said, screw it. We're not even going to give them a chance to plug it.

[Jared]

Have you ever had to shove lamb trimmings down a drain? Stop.

[Ryan]

Way harder.

[Jared]

If that thing's in there, they're like.

[Ryan]

Oh, God, I forgot. I thought this was a garbage disposal. This had a grinder in it.

[Tyler]

But.

[Miles]

Ryan's room, when we walked in, smelled like they were cramming for a test. So it's almost like they forgot we were coming that night. And as they saw us pulling up, they said, oh, and ran into his room and just started spraying Febreze all over the entire room because they forgot to clean it. I don't know how you slept in there.

[Ryan]

I was thinking, like, I couldn't. I couldn't. Pinned down whether my headache came from drinking the night before or just. Just sniffing those smells the entire night. Now, I did, because you told me about the Google reviews before we left. So I was. I was at no I was at.

[Miles]

I had to share the burden, you know?

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

Otherwise, I've been a nervous Nelly by myself the whole drive down there.

[Ryan]

I'm glad you did, because I. I brought a sleeping bag. I slept in my sleeping bag on top of the covers. I brought my own pillow.

[Jared]

That smart.

[Ryan]

I washed pillow cover right when I got home, before I went to bed that night. Yep.

[Jared]

So, I mean, you just leave that pillow there. Don't even risk it.

[Ryan]

It's a great. It's a great pillow, though. Bring your really great pillow.

[Jared]

Bring your shittiest one and just leave it at the hotel.

[Miles]

You know what actually came in clutch this weekend? Hunting.

[Ryan]

What do you got for us?

[Miles]

Me?

[Ryan]

Something more than a shotgun.

[Miles]

Wait, what?

[Ryan]

My shotgun comes up clutching.

[Miles]

It's true.

[Ryan]

That is true.

[Tyler]

Not much of a marksman.

[Miles]

Yeah. What came in clutch was we brought a couple cases, Ice Mountain with. And I tell you what, the water in that hotel is not ever going to touch my lips. Figured my tongue, I guess, touched my.

[Jared]

Lips in the shower, but no, you went like this.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

In the shower. You covered them.

[Miles]

I put. I wore a mask or one of.

[Ryan]

Those mouth guards that covers your lips.

[Miles]

Pacifier one.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Hostage tape. No. Not a single drop of water is gonna land on my tongue in that hotel. And so we brought a case. We brought a case of Ice Mountain, and by the time I left, there was water bottles everywhere.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Miles]

I was just hammering them because I've been drinking the whole time, trying to have a good hunting day the next day. Got to stay hydrated.

[Ryan]

Yeah. I didn't even throw my bottles away. I just left them scattered across the room. Left them for the next.

[Miles]

Yeah, they're definitely still there.

[Ryan]

For sure. Yeah.

[Miles]

So, guys, if you are going on a hunting trip, don't forget your case of Ice Mountain. You won't regret it, I promise. Guys, we are doing prize picks again this week. Your boys took home the W last week. Yes, we did, but. And you guys can hopefully take home a W. If you sign up right now on Prize picks with code YBR, you get $50 instantly. And when you play your place, your first $5 lineup, you don't need to win your lineup to receive the $50 bonus. It's just guaranteed. You know what was guaranteed last week? A win for the boys.

[Ryan]

Yes, it was.

[Miles]

We're just that good.

[Jared]

I have unfortunate news. I was at the game, at the Vikings game, distracted. Didn't get in on the winning lineup.

[Ryan]

Oh, no.

[Jared]

Absolutely, Jared. Send it to the group chat.

[Tyler]

I clicked it.

[Jared]

It spun A little bit. And I was too focused on tailgating and having a good time. I just swiped out.

[Miles]

Well, I was talking about our one on ybr.

[Jared]

Oh yeah.

[Miles]

It's hard to keep track of all of our wins.

[Jared]

Double win for you guys then this weekend.

[Miles]

If we can win on prize picks, you can win as. That's right. Especially Ryan.

[Ryan]

Now they got a thousand xers.

[Miles]

I mean it's.

[Ryan]

We were jack driving down fez on. I was cooking. I was absolutely formulating thousand xers on the way down.

[Jared]

The thousand extra. You said got one right?

[Ryan]

I know. But hey, if you don't know, if.

[Miles]

You don't try, it just doesn't matter. We were doing the math. If you put.

[Jared]

I put 20.

[Miles]

If you put $1 million down on a thousand thousand x lineup, you could win $1 billion.

[Tyler]

Sorry, prize fix.

[Miles]

If you put a billion dollars down on a thousand x lineup, you could win a trillion dollars.

[Ryan]

You could be the richest man on earth in one Sunday.

[Tyler]

And you can put that in the s and P500.

[Miles]

And then you put it in the s and P500. And in seven years you have $2 trillion.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Jared]

$2 trillion. If Will Leviss throws for 278 and.

[Ryan]

A half, I could literally buy any NFL team I wanted.

[Jared]

You could.

[Miles]

You could. You could buy entire league.

[Ryan]

True. Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah. The trillion.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Trillion go up to Goodell. I'll give you a trillion dollars for this league.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

So yeah. All right. Should we submit our lineup? First one we got is the free square. Patrick Mahomes got a throw for more than a half a yard this week. That's a tough that one. So everyone's got that one in the bag. I'm gonna go with my boy George K. I had him at 59 and a half more than. And you guys said let's crank this up a not faith in Kittle. And we cranked it up to 69 and a half yards. So my pick is more than 69 and a half receiving yards for George Kittle. Jared, what's yours?

[Tyler]

Adam thielen. More than 59 and a half receiving yards against Dallas.

[Miles]

Okay, you guys know that he's from Minnesota?

[Jared]

No way.

[Miles]

He went to Detroit Lakes High school. Went to Mankato.

[Jared]

Did he get any scholarship offers?

[Miles]

No, not a single one.

[Jared]

What?

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Was he a dentist or something?

[Jared]

Oh, he might have sold their equipment. I'm going to go with Jared verse. More than 0.25 sacks.

[Miles]

Just a bananas pick.

[Jared]

No, dude, I hit on because I said that.

[Miles]

But just a bananas move.

[Jared]

Jared versus A beast.

[Miles]

Yeah, he wasn't.

[Ryan]

I'll cap things off. Sam Darnold, more than 12 and a half rush yards.

[Jared]

Love it.

[Ryan]

Sammy D, 12 and a half.

[Jared]

More swinging Darnold.

[Miles]

Okay, so you go. Patrick Marones, more than a half. Jared verse, more than 0.25 sacks. Sam Darnold, more than 12 and a half rush yards. Adam Thielen, more than 59 and a half receiving yards. And George kittle, more than 69 and a half receiving yards. So, guys, get your lineup in. Now, if we cook up a good thousand extra this weekend, maybe we should throw. Throw the picks on Patreon.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Miles]

So the patrons can ride.

[Ryan]

Yeah, we can do that. We get the group chat's awesome.

[Miles]

So. All right, guys, good luck.

[Ryan]

Do you want me to tell a room key story? But when we had to go, you weren't with. We had. Me and a couple other guys had to go back. One guy's room key didn't work. So me and three other guys, we had to go back to the hotel to change before we're gonna go get something to eat or something to drink. And the one guy's room key didn't work. So we had to call the guy down from the upstairs to come down, make him a room key. And so the guy comes down and I'd say, this guy I'm referring to, he's a pretty trustworthy guy. He wouldn't bullshit a story like this. I don't know. But there was the guy working at the hotel, there was blood on his hands when he was making the new room key. Like, not even. It didn't even bought if he was doing something upstairs. Didn't even.

[Miles]

Probably quartering a layer.

[Ryan]

Yeah, he didn't even bother to wash his hand. And I didn't see it firsthand, but I just assumed to trust this guy, that was accurate.

[Miles]

I heard this story too.

[Ryan]

And after that, I'm like, the lamb story has got to be true. It can't just be an out. Like an out of town.

[Jared]

Did they live upstairs? Maybe he was just making supper. Yeah.

[Tyler]

Squashing beets with his hands.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

He's having steak. I mean, it's a really rare steak.

[Ryan]

Observation. We can give him the benefit of the.

[Miles]

Maybe he was dying eggs. Could have been dying food coloring.

[Jared]

Just getting ahead on Easter.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Dying Christmas cookies.

[Miles]

Christmas cook have been frosting.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Red velvet cake.

[Ryan]

I mean, we could go. We could go on and on.

[Tyler]

So you guys slept terribly well once you.

[Miles]

After night one? I slept great.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Same, same. You got to get through the first night, and then you're. You're in the clear. Good to go. Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

The one. So there's a guy with us who works on the railroad. And he was like thinking this whole. He went. He's like, this hotel is great compared to some of the hotels I stay in on the road.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So that I'm like, okay, well, fuck you, dude.

[Ryan]

This place sucks. Yeah.

[Miles]

You're trying to, you know, out do me with what? Worse.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

The Four Seasons. That one Google review that I saw was. It was like. I went to check in and it looked like a gal came out from in the back. Looked like she had just woken up, and she wasn't wearing a bra and she had a very thin shirt on, if you know what I mean. And what's funny is I, you know exactly what girl is. She was there the year before. I'm like, yeah, I had the same experience. This is not an isolated incident.

[Ryan]

If I remember the shirt that she was wearing.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Ryan]

And then I don't. The guy working one of the other. The older guy working the front desk. First night he had a police hat. On second night he had a security hat on.

[Miles]

And like, it just is a black and white hat that just said police.

[Tyler]

You got the gas station.

[Miles]

Was it yellow the next day or what?

[Ryan]

Yeah, the police was white on a black hat. And then the next day, I think security was yellow on a black hat. So it's like, that's the guy you want managing a hotel if someone were to break in. I mean, we got a police officer slash security guard right there at the.

[Jared]

Shaman that does ritual sacrifice.

[Ryan]

That's a different guy. So the people who did that, they were forced to. I'm pretty sure they were forced to sell the whole.

[Jared]

Someone bought it.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah, this thing, dude, this is location, location, location.

[Ryan]

Absolutely.

[Miles]

This is prime real estate right by.

[Ryan]

The interstate, and it's the only place to stay in town.

[Tyler]

Did they have carnival breakfast again?

[Miles]

Oh, yeah. Okay. They. They fancied it up. There was two different kinds of granola bars.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Ryan]

Nutri Grain.

[Miles]

And you're like, oh, and what else? No, that's just it, you know, like the little clear shelving with the door where they like put like bagels and breads and stuff in there. They just put the granola bars in there.

[Jared]

They were very unwrap them for you.

[Ryan]

They did not know, but they were very nicely lined up. They're actually like perfectly lined up.

[Miles]

So I think they might be turning a corner.

[Tyler]

Got sort of.

[Jared]

Hey, good things happen. They made the right sacrifices and we got.

[Ryan]

We got back the second night we had to go back, change whatever. My room key didn't work. So one of the guys I was with just went behind the counter and made me a new room key because he remembered the password from like 3 years ago.

[Miles]

Well, when you get back at 2am drunk and they don't answer the thing, you got to get in your room. What are you supposed to do?

[Ryan]

You got to use your resources.

[Tyler]

Wow.

[Miles]

Yeah. Also, the sink in my room was like setting one thing of deodorant more on it from just falling off of the wall.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah.

[Miles]

Like gap between the wall and the sink is like that much. And it was leaning like this because it's like you couldn't set anything on it. It slide off onto the.

[Ryan]

So I was about two towels too short to be able to make like a. Like a towel trail throughout my room of like different, like different routes that I would need to take, like bed to bathroom, bed to door to get out, bed to like my bag, whatever.

[Miles]

And you're wondering why on earth would he need to make pads with towels? Well, because we were at the bar the first night we got there, and the lady who used to manage the hotel said, the beds are probably all right, but don't leave anything on the floor. And we were all like, fuck, my bag is sitting on the floor right now.

[Jared]

Because I like all the bugs and shit.

[Miles]

I don't. I don't know. I don't. I didn't want to pry, you know, because then it's. You're up all night thinking about how I'm going to have to play if the floor is lava, if I got a pee in the morning in the middle of the night.

[Ryan]

And we hadn't even made it through night one yet. So it's like we. This is good stuff for night two.

[Miles]

It was good that she told us that. Night one. Just whatever. So when I took a shower, I had also the shower. The little soap, they come in a little baggie. So you. I'm guessing it's good. But the smell. How would you describe the. Did you use the bar of soap that they provided?

[Ryan]

I did, yeah. I was so fucking stuffed up though I was dry.

[Miles]

It was. It didn't smell like soap at all. I don't know how to describe it. It like. The soap also spell smelled musty.

[Tyler]

Okay. Like. Like oats or something.

[Miles]

Like it was. It wasn't good. And then this. The soap was so bad that quite literally I washed my face with it and then like I went to like wipe my face and my hand just got stuck.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

You know what I'm talking about.

[Ryan]

Sticky bar assault feeling in any hotel.

[Miles]

Room, dry your skin out so much that it's just like sandpaper. But that's me being a diva.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You know?

[Ryan]

Yeah. Soap is soap when it comes down to it.

[Miles]

That's true. So yeah, yeah, we got, I got everything elevated, got it off of the floor, then I went to go send it, set it on the chair in the corner and there was a stain on that. So I was like, I don't think I should be setting it on this either.

[Jared]

Everything on the bed.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it's fabricated.

[Miles]

So you just sleep on one side of the bed, have everything else on the other side of the bed. So all in all, good hunting trip though.

[Ryan]

Great hunting trip.

[Miles]

We just there it's like, honestly, it's a win if no one gets bedbugs. And I think we were good again.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

We've been playing this roulette every year for like 20 years and so far so good.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Tyler]

Been a block every year.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I mean we, yeah, we could go on and on.

[Miles]

So hun was good though. Thanks for asking.

[Jared]

Guys, you already said it was good.

[Ann]

Sorry.

[Miles]

Ask me how it went.

[Jared]

You already said it was good.

[Ryan]

I would ask you, but I already know how it went.

[Miles]

We're, I mean, me and Ryan were.

[Ryan]

Dialed in when we got kind of shit faced on Thursday night, night before the first day of, of hunting. Everyone else is showing up on, on Friday morning. We're like, we went down Thursday and tide went on a little bit. And last year when we did that didn't go well. We shot 15 to 20%. I don't even think I shot a bird till last walk. And this year, I mean, I don't know if it was like my vision has improved or like just my a. I. We were so fucking dialed on day one. And I would also beg to say we were so fucking dialed on day two.

[Miles]

I mean like with everyone else in our hunting party. Didn't even need to load their guns.

[Ryan]

No.

[Miles]

Because Ryan and I just got it.

[Ryan]

I got to a point where I would like wait till a bird got to a certain spot so I could shoot it and then potentially catch it.

[Miles]

That's how good Ryan was picking your shots.

[Ryan]

Pretty much, yeah.

[Miles]

I got to a point where I was like, I'll, I'll wait on this one just to give someone else a shot at it.

[Ryan]

Yeah, many times we did that. And we like to walk together because we. We like. We like to give. Give each other back and forth. Or I got this and. Oh, I got that one. It was. I don't know. It's a good. Lot of good laughs in the field.

[Miles]

A lot of good laughs.

[Jared]

Good.

[Miles]

So, yeah. What'd you guys do this weekend?

[Jared]

I moved into a new house.

[Miles]

Nice job. Congratulations. Thank you.

[Jared]

Thank you.

[Miles]

What would you say is the best and worst part about moving your entire house an hour away?

[Jared]

The best part is everyone realizes how shitty that is, so they're more willing to help. I feel like I moved like, five miles the last time I moved, and people less people helped than this time, so I feel like they thought that he's got to be desperate, so everybody and their brother came to help.

[Miles]

I think it's also, like, he ain't moving again, so, yeah, let's help out.

[Jared]

His last one.

[Miles]

I'll do it this time. And then, like, he can't hold it over my head forever. That didn't help. Move.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Ryan]

So what did you offer up for people coming to help move?

[Jared]

I said that I have three cases of beer and seven pizzas.

[Ryan]

Okay, so you just went the classic classic.

[Jared]

There was. There was no showboating whatsoever. Like, this is what I will give you. And they all showed up. Usually, like, you send it to your buddies. Like, maybe one will come up. They all came help, so shouts to them.

[Miles]

So you did, like, personal pizzas from the gas station?

[Jared]

Yeah, it was all the little bites. Yep. Bagel bites. Thank you.

[Miles]

Bagel bites. And then he burnt the shit out of them. Did the pizza the other day when the girls did the pod.

[Ryan]

Did you read the directions on how long to leave it in got squirrely on?

[Jared]

No, I just turned the dial to 12 and left.

[Ryan]

Yeah, we know. We ate the pizza.

[Jared]

Hey, you're welcome for the free pizza I fed your kid that night.

[Ryan]

My kid didn't eat it. He said it was. It was it. You asked him, like, how the pizza was, and he said. He said, like, crusty or crispy or something.

[Jared]

Crispy. Because I kept telling my kids, like, it's burnt down. I'm like, no, it's just crispy.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

$. I had a couple slices. That pizza was fucking terrible.

[Jared]

Yeah, it was $4 pizza that I.

[Miles]

Literally had to, like, just eat anything else to get the burnt taste out of it. My mouth tasted like I just smoked a pack of cigarettes.

[Tyler]

It's like cheap soap.

[Ryan]

I almost. I almost drank a diet Coke. It was on a Tuesday. I was that close to get the. Get the taste out of my mouth.

[Miles]

Like I was the pizza on fire.

[Jared]

I could have been. I don't know.

[Miles]

It tasted like a marshmallow that you just let start on fire.

[Ryan]

And like, like I, I was still pretty hungry because I, I was assuming the kids were gonna eat a majority of it. So I had a couple pieces right away. It was pretty good when it was hot, but then it start to cool down. Then it was like chewing on like this ice mountain bottle for a piece of pizza.

[Jared]

I don't know. My kids ate it. They didn't complain.

[Miles]

Well, I can't imagine how you cook at home.

[Jared]

I don't.

[Miles]

They're like, yeah, anytime dad cooks, it's just char. Yeah.

[Ryan]

Throw it in.

[Miles]

Corn dogs. Forgot them in the oven for too long.

[Jared]

You can't burn Mac and cheese.

[Ryan]

Yeah, well, that's true.

[Miles]

If anyone could, it probably would be Utah.

[Ryan]

If it does get overdone, like I assume it get hard at that point. Like undercooked noodles would be hard as overcooked noodles would be hard. We just call it al dente.

[Jared]

I don't think I've ever boiled a noodle long enough for it to get hard again.

[Miles]

Well, I wish it did that with pizza.

[Ryan]

But thank you for the pizza.

[Jared]

You're welcome.

[Miles]

It was like a frozen pizza started out frozen and hard and then he cooked it and it was hot and hard.

[Ryan]

It's all a good laugh though.

[Miles]

Yeah. We've all burnt a pizza before, just not usually when it's the only pizza for a group of people.

[Jared]

I think we'll have a really fun story about Miles cooking coming up when we react to the girls pod. So save my comments for that.

[Miles]

I know what you're talking about. It's not. It has nothing to do with my cooking.

[Jared]

Okay.

[Ryan]

I don't know if I remember that one.

[Tyler]

I don't either.

[Ryan]

Okay, good, good. I was gonna say the best thing about Tyler Mood an hour away is that he cleared the trailer out for us. We had an old. Oh my God doors in it. He got him.

[Miles]

Oh, really?

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

I did warn you beforehand that I completely forgot.

[Jared]

I was this fucking close to dragging those to my house.

[Miles]

Dude, that is just peak miles right there. Yeah, it is putting something off. Saying you're going to do it later and then somehow someone else does it. Or. Or it just. You never end up needing to do it anymore. And that was. I didn't even realize that.

[Jared]

Yeah, we got it out pretty easy actually. We just put a pallet jack in on one side and then got it almost halfway out and then put another pallet jack in on the other side. Gotcha.

[Miles]

That's what we didn't stack for that purpose.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

So we didn't actually have to lift anything, which is sweet.

[Ryan]

It would have been nice had you got them to your house and then disposed of them for us.

[Miles]

I would have.

[Jared]

I'd have just brought the trailer back, parked it.

[Ryan]

I did warn you in advance that was going to happen.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

So no any goat? No ghosts or anything like, anything weird about the house the first couple nights sleep?

[Jared]

Not yet, no. I got a pack of coyotes in the backyard that I'm gonna have to get a license and legally take care of.

[Miles]

You're gonna have to hang over the dumpster and gut them out and quarter them up. Put them in your kid's bathtub.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

I like that.

[Ryan]

Make your youngest kid a nice little blanket.

[Jared]

Yep. Here you go, buddy. Little mangy blanket, Little coyote comforter.

[Miles]

You could have a whole, whole litter of boys that look like they're in Game of Thrones. Yeah, they're wolf Pel.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

House Ziggler.

[Ryan]

Yeah, you'll have coyote pellets hanging around that place in no time.

[Jared]

Setting up my bait pile.

[Miles]

Can you hunt coyotes at night with, like a thermal scope in Minnesota?

[Jared]

I don't know. I don't know about Minnesota. I know in a lot of states you can.

[Miles]

That'd be kind of sick. Also a great excuse to get a thermal.

[Jared]

My brother has a thermal scope and it is so cool to look through.

[Ryan]

Wait, you have a brother?

[Jared]

Brother in law.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Miles]

Got to start over. I was going to say. Okay, here we fucking go.

[Ryan]

Okay. That makes.

[Miles]

Oops. There it is.

[Jared]

It's sweet. He's like. Yeah. We're standing in his yard and he owns like 100 acres, right? And you see nothing but black. You pull the thermal scope up and it just lights up with every critter. It's super fucking cool.

[Miles]

God, I gotta get one of those.

[Ryan]

My. My buddy who lives in Minnesota, he also has a thermal. Yeah, I. You know, I think he maybe just uses it for target practice. I don't think he. I don't know. Maybe he does. Don't know if it's legal or not. I did see on Tick Tock the other day, they had like these thermal binoculars for like 12 bucks. God, I almost pulled the trigger. Black Friday deal, like a 20 coupon.

[Miles]

Teemu shopper.

[Ryan]

Yeah. I almost bought one. I was this close.

[Jared]

You should have.

[Ryan]

Dude, I did buy that. You ever seen them big, them flashlights, the super bright ones? Mine just Showed up yesterday.

[Jared]

Some dude got the. He shined the cops and that's how he got away when he was. He was drunk driving and he just took his super high powered flashlight and shined it back at the police and they got blinded and lost him.

[Miles]

That does.

[Jared]

And they have dash.

[Ryan]

That's insane.

[Jared]

There's dash cam footage of it wouldn't.

[Miles]

When you just follow the light.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that's what I was gonna say.

[Jared]

They blinded him, he turned it off. He's fucking gone. I watched the dash cam footage. The cops couldn't drive. They didn't know where they were going. They were completely blinded off.

[Miles]

Jesus.

[Ryan]

Let's call that a blind side. Yeah, Blindside hit.

[Miles]

I guess he got in their blind spot.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Speaking of blindside spot, truck went in yesterday. So getting that fixed?

[Jared]

Hell yeah.

[Ryan]

So Merry Christmas to me.

[Jared]

No more holes.

[Ryan]

Nope. And thanks to Jared got that puppy paid for.

[Tyler]

Oh, yeah, that's right.

[Ryan]

We. We smoked another P. Picks lineup.

[Miles]

Oh, I was wondering what was going on there. I thought you were talking about insurance or something.

[Ryan]

No, no, Price picks.

[Miles]

I was like, is Jared moonlighting as an insurance guy? No. I gotta start over with you, Jared.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

You can't put a price on security.

[Ryan]

No. Nope.

[Miles]

So overall, very eventful weekend for Ryan and I and Tyler.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I don't know if Jared, you did shit or not, but.

[Jared]

Oh, yeah, I also went to the Vikings game, so I very moved and went to the Vikings game.

[Ryan]

Yeah. I saw G. Davis live. He was live on Facebook.

[Jared]

He was trying to FaceTime grandma using Facebook messenger, and he just went Facebook live instead for 14 seconds. And the whole video is just the back of the heads. The guys in the row in front of us. And some dude commented on it. He's like, those guys need to live it up. Pretty sad.

[Miles]

He got a comment.

[Jared]

He got a comment. Oh, yeah, I'll pull it up.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

How popular is he on Facebook?

[Ryan]

He had a comment, a reply, and then a comment back to his reply. So 14 seconds. I mean, he. He didn't even wait for people to pop in before things really got started.

[Jared]

Okay, I got to find the right.

[Miles]

Well, wait for everyone to hop on. I'm just going to be, you know, doing my makeup.

[Jared]

He's got four Facebook accounts because he keeps forgetting his password and making a new one.

[Miles]

Why don't you guys just write it down?

[Jared]

He does, and then he loses the note.

[Miles]

Why don't you write it down? So when he texts you and ask you, trust me, I'm speaking from experience here.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

I'll find it for you guys later.

[Ryan]

Yeah, we'll get it later.

[Miles]

All right, well, should we take a break, boys?

[Ryan]

Well, I'm in for a breaker. You got majority. It's got to be a majority, so.

[Tyler]

Yep, I'm ready.

[Miles]

Okay. All right, got. Whoa, guys. I just. Sorry. I was just so excited because we have a stocking stuff stuffer bundle going on right now.

[Ryan]

Stuff that stocking.

[Miles]

It's. Yeah, it's not just a bundle of some of our best items. It's a stocking stuffer bundle. And if you're wondering can it fit in the stocking, it was a two man job, but Tyler and I got it in a stocking today. So what's the bundle, Ryan?

[Ryan]

We got two different stocking stuff for bundles. We got the buzzin bundle and we got the Midwest bundle. The buzzing bundle bundle is a gray and white boys are buzzin patch hat, the nectar of the gods, navy white hat. And the boys are buzzin 3 foot by 5 foot flag.

[Jared]

Like that one behind Miles.

[Ryan]

Right behind. Exact one Midwest bundle. Not that exact one, but khaki, black road hunting for dish chickens, which I'm wearing currently. Great hat. And then we got the black Midwest's best snapback hat as well as the Midwest's best three foot.

[Miles]

And the best part is, is that it's only 19.99.

[Ryan]

60 value for 19.99. If you call within the next 20 minutes, we'll give you five free. No, we won't do.

[Miles]

We won't do that. We're not. We're literally not getting.

[Ryan]

Well, there's no number to call. That's the thing. Who am I gonna call?

[Miles]

If you. If you order right now, we'll give you a free koozie. How about.

[Ryan]

Okay, okay.

[Miles]

So every order from now until Christmas, it's a free koozie.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Miles]

Just came up with that deal myself.

[Jared]

So you better get on that ride.

[Ryan]

Deal.

[Miles]

How are they getting away with this? I don't know. I don't know.

[Ryan]

Didn't pull him out of the trash.

[Jared]

God damn it. We posted a merch post the other day, Ryan, and the first comment was heard. They got those hats out of the garbage.

[Miles]

Word spreading, man. You really fucked us.

[Jared]

The first comment.

[Ryan]

He's in on the joke.

[Miles]

And ever since that comment hit, we haven't sold a single one of those hats.

[Ryan]

You know, we are selling those tongs. 450 per pair of tongs. Also. I can again, I can see the bottom of the pallet. I did the math today and we have just shy of 400 tongs left.

[Miles]

Okay, we're almost there, folks.

[Ryan]

We started with 2,000.

[Miles]

No, 3,000.

[Ryan]

3,000.

[Miles]

So we're almost to the end. But your guys, you're wondering, 1999, how are we doing it? I don't know. It could.

[Jared]

That's Ryan's problem.

[Miles]

I haven't. I was gone this this month when I was supposed to have my accountant meeting. So it's kind of nice that we postpone that till after Christmas just to future miles problem.

[Ryan]

I cooked up that deceived and be.

[Miles]

Like, you can't sell it for 19.99. Too late. Too late.

[Jared]

I already did it.

[Miles]

You want me to send everyone's money back and have them return everything? You can't. Yeah.

[Ryan]

What do you want me to send them a bill for the excess?

[Miles]

So go check it out all you. Bet you.com. you only got what, about a week left?

[Ryan]

Yeah. December 18th. It's gonna be the last day you can get it before Christmas.

[Miles]

I mean, you can still buy it after that.

[Ryan]

Yeah. If you want it for Christmas.

[Miles]

By Christmas. So.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

All right. Well, guys, we have one of our favorite segments.

[Jared]

Bringing it back retro.

[Miles]

We have a top three segment, and I'm feeling pretty good about this one. Today we're going to talk about the top three manly. What are your top three manly chores?

[Jared]

Ooh, do you. Who's starting?

[Miles]

I'll start right off the bat. And again, this is three to one. So this is my lowest one. Mine's in order.

[Ryan]

Yep, mine too.

[Miles]

My number one will be my number one. Just want to keep that. Why I call it a top three.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Jared]

Thanks.

[Miles]

Very good. I. This one, I think, is going to be somewhat down the middle. I don't know how you guys are going to feel this, but I really like doing this chore, and that is changing the air filter in my house.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Miles]

1. You don't have to do it very often. Like once every five years or something.

[Ryan]

I do mine once, but we talked about this. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Once a month.

[Jared]

Honestly, I tried our eyes bugged before.

[Ryan]

We realized it was a bit water softener.

[Miles]

Honestly, I like doing it so much. I did it early, I did it after three years and so got ahead of it.

[Ryan]

Got risky. You might have.

[Miles]

I definitely don't do it as much as you guys do, but probably like once every six months.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I just. I buy like a 20 pack of air filters off Amazon and I just. Whenever. I mean, I got 20 months worth.

[Miles]

I got. Mine are like thick. Boys. If I buy 20 of them it would like take up. It would be huge. Mine are like that thick.

[Ryan]

Mine are thin, boys. Mine are about three quarters of an inch. Three quarter inch. Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah. That's big in my book.

[Miles]

Mine is like, that's too big.

[Jared]

I heard those ones hurt the air filter.

[Ryan]

Yeah, they hurt the furnace.

[Tyler]

Yeah, it's like Jupiter.

[Miles]

But so what I like about it is when you pull out the old one. Comparing the two.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

If you don't think every single time. I'm not pulling out the old one and holding up the new one and going, God, that's a lot of dust. You're dreaming.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Maddie, what do you want your kid breathing that dust? It's like, my kid could have. Could have breathed in all the dust on this air filter.

[Jared]

You should save the used air filters for when your kid gets older and he's got a little bit of an attitude. Be like, look at how much dust I've saved you from breathing.

[Miles]

Oh, well, I still have the last two that I did.

[Jared]

Were you gonna reuse them?

[Miles]

Was too lazy. I just left it on the ground in the furnace room.

[Tyler]

Bring them in.

[Ryan]

That's insane.

[Miles]

Also, I have this thing where like I. Every time I forget if I'm putting it in the right way, you know, like which way to flip it. And I think I. I mean, now I'm just doing it the same way I did it before. All the dust is on it. So if it was the other. If it wasn't. You know what I mean?

[Ryan]

Yeah, No, I get what you're saying. The first couple of times I changed it, I would, I like I had. I would like I had the old one still in, but I would have a grasp on it and then I would have the other, the new one in my other hand and I would like, like just quickly swap it as.

[Miles]

Fast as you can.

[Jared]

Like Indiana Jones.

[Ryan]

Yes. So I knew it was going incorrectly.

[Miles]

Oh, I thought you were saying because you just didn't want to lick a dust getting through.

[Ryan]

No, no, no. I just, I. First time home buyer, you know, I didn't fucking know.

[Ann]

Well.

[Miles]

And it's like, first six months you move into a new house, there's a lot of dust from construction floating around. So you should do it after six months, but you can go a few years after that because all the initial dust from the build is gone. So what?

[Ryan]

Just helps build the immune system up too?

[Miles]

So no, now I would be lying if I said I didn't forget about it for too long. But now I got a reminder on my Phone every so often to change it out.

[Ryan]

Yours in the. Is yours in the basement?

[Miles]

Oh, yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

And you don't.

[Miles]

You don't ever go down there.

[Ryan]

You don't go down.

[Miles]

Basement isn't finished off.

[Ryan]

Yeah, scary, though. I get it.

[Miles]

Which maybe I'll have to finish off the basement this winter. I'll bring Ryan over. We can fucking get a air. Air gun going.

[Jared]

How do you get that bench stained first, probably?

[Miles]

Well, no, at least. I at least got to get the studs up down there to even know if I, like, even want to finish. And they get a feel for the layout, you know?

[Ryan]

Yeah, you got to get a. You got to paint a better mental picture with studs up.

[Miles]

Yeah, I would like to go from. Yeah, I don't want to go from nothing to rugs. I'd like to go from studs to rugs. I'd like to bring the feel of my upstairs, downstairs. Go from studs to rugs.

[Ryan]

Well, you'll be down there.

[Jared]

That's such a localized joke.

[Miles]

Only the people in Fargo are going to get the feel of your upstairs, downstairs. Studs to rugs.

[Tyler]

Probably got that out.

[Jared]

We love it.

[Miles]

Not a sponsor, by the way.

[Ryan]

No, just a good. Just catchy radio.

[Jared]

That's marketing.

[Miles]

That's marketing, baby. I have no gauge on whether or not they do a good job or not. All I know is they'll just take your house. They. They won't. Yeah. If you have sheetrock up, call a different company.

[Ryan]

Yeah, there's no sheet rock.

[Miles]

They only go from studs Rugs. And if you don't want them. If you don't want rugs, they don't do it either.

[Ryan]

Yeah, they don't even put car. They don't do carpet. They just do oversized. Oversized.

[Miles]

They just overlap rugs.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Kind of could be a good vibe in a basement, though.

[Jared]

Just a Tetris work of area rugs.

[Ryan]

Yeah, a lot of probably scraps from, like, previous jobs or.

[Miles]

No, you hire them to finish your basement and then like, literally just put studs up and then just lay some rugs down. Like, what the. I thought this was studs in the song.

[Jared]

You heard it?

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

It's literally in the name.

[Jared]

My number three. And this is a very manly chore. But I'm putting it on my number three because it's one, it's kind of basic. And two, Tick Tock has ruined it. But splitting wood. Splitting wood's a very manly chore.

[Miles]

So have you turned a corner? Because every time you talk about splitting wood, growing up you said how much you hated it.

[Jared]

Yeah, but it made me feel manly still.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Jared]

No, I fucking hate it. Don't get me wrong. It sucks ass.

[Miles]

Okay. I guess I misunderstood the statement. I thought it was top. I was wrong. I thought it was top. Three manly chores that you like is.

[Jared]

I. I didn't read that in the rules.

[Miles]

No, I know. We didn't clarify.

[Jared]

I know.

[Miles]

Could have done different list then I suppose.

[Jared]

Do that next week.

[Ryan]

You're. You're good?

[Jared]

Sure.

[Ryan]

Okay. Well.

[Jared]

No, yeah, I could be done.

[Miles]

Let's talk about chopping wood. Tell the story about when you moved out.

[Jared]

Oh, my God. Okay, so I split wood for five or six years for my dad all the time. Right? The second. I'm not kidding. The second he dropped me off at college, he drove to a store and bought a wood splitter.

[Ryan]

He wasn't gonna fucking split that wood.

[Jared]

Why would he.

[Miles]

Well, his wood splitter went off to college. How does that make you feel? You were just a.

[Jared]

You.

[Miles]

Utility.

[Ryan]

He literally.

[Jared]

He traded me in like a used car for a newer, shinier model.

[Ryan]

God, wood splitters are so nice.

[Miles]

And honestly, he definitely upgraded because the new wood splitter that he got didn't talk back.

[Jared]

Nope. Didn't leave lights on in his house.

[Miles]

Always finished his supper, took short showers.

[Tyler]

Didn'T break water pipes in schools.

[Miles]

Yeah, that's true. Didn't play shittily at wrestling and had to run home.

[Jared]

Yeah. Wood splitter got pulled home in a nice truck.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Yeah. New air in the tires. Probably put nitrogen in the tires. Honestly.

[Jared]

Seriously.

[Miles]

That'd be funny. Like makes. He gets. Picks up the wood splitter on the way to college and he puts Tyler in the bed and the wood splitter goes in the bed of the truck or in the cab of the truck.

[Jared]

Front seat, like, doesn't fit at all.

[Miles]

But he just. He's got to drive like this because fucking hitch is going on his face.

[Ryan]

That would be. That would be good. I mean, some of your dad would probably do. Honestly.

[Miles]

I mean, honestly, smart to just do a two for one trip when you got to come up to Fargo.

[Jared]

Now the wood splitter also got replaced. I just found out this. This out the other day. He doesn't even use that anymore. He just buys two cords of wood every winter. Really? Yeah.

[Ryan]

So he. He's checked out.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

From splitting his own wood.

[Jared]

No more chores, huh?

[Ryan]

I respect it though. You know, age is creeping out.

[Jared]

I think it's. All the kids are out of the house now.

[Miles]

Yeah. Let them know.

[Jared]

I'm not even Gonna use the splitter.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Let him know that Ryan said he's getting too old to split wood.

[Jared]

I'll let him know.

[Miles]

I'm sure he'll love that.

[Ryan]

Do it. So let me know what he says, dude.

[Jared]

Okay, I'll send you screenshots.

[Ryan]

My.

[Miles]

My third has also got way more time to fly drones now.

[Ryan]

That's true, that's true.

[Jared]

You gotta prioritize your passions.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

My third manly chore was cutting trees with a chainsaw. That's why I wanted. Yeah, I wanted you to finish about splitting wood with the traditional ax.

[Jared]

But my chore can't happen without your chore.

[Ryan]

No, exactly. And there's something about being elevated with a tool that could kill somebody.

[Jared]

Yeah, there's a whole movie series about it in Texas.

[Ryan]

Yes.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah, what's it called?

[Ryan]

Yeah, it was in Texas.

[Miles]

The Austin Wood Cutter Rampage. What was it again?

[Ryan]

Yes.

[Jared]

No, you got it.

[Ryan]

It was a chain.

[Miles]

That was it.

[Jared]

Yeah, the Austin Woodcutter Rampage.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Tyler]

It's on Roki tv.

[Ryan]

Root.

[Miles]

It's on Phoebe.

[Ryan]

Or whatever it is.

[Jared]

Is a chainsaw the manliest tool as well?

[Miles]

Well, I would say that an ax is pretty fucking manly.

[Jared]

Very manly.

[Ryan]

Yeah. I mean, if you look at the people who like are professionals in using chainsaws and axes too, they're some of the most manly looking dudes out there. I mean, we're talking big beards for reals. We're talking suspenders oiled up.

[Miles]

I. Fucking bulging pecs. Nice cutoff flannels, six packs.

[Ryan]

You ever seen that one guy rock hard ass.

[Jared]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Tick tock's ruined. Splitting wood.

[Ryan]

Yeah, because it's.

[Jared]

Now it's just thirst traps for middle aged moms.

[Ryan]

Correct. Yeah, but he can split some wood though.

[Jared]

He can.

[Miles]

And 30 year old males apparently, well.

[Ryan]

You got to look up to somebody, you know, I think his name's Thor, so I didn't.

[Miles]

Cutting stuff with a chainsaw is elite.

[Ryan]

It's awesome.

[Jared]

Dude, new house. The old owners left me a chainsaw chainsaw in the garage. And I was more excited about that than 90 of the other stuff.

[Miles]

Question is, how many poles did it take to start?

[Jared]

Haven't even tried yet.

[Miles]

Oh God. You're gonna have to block off an afternoon.

[Jared]

I know.

[Ryan]

There's no.

[Miles]

Bring some oil and some gas.

[Jared]

I just. I just know the glare. I'm gonna look for my wife. If I start dicking with the chainsaw before all the boxes are out of the kitchen.

[Miles]

How are you going to get the Boxes open.

[Jared]

That's such a good point.

[Miles]

Forgot your pocket knife at the old house.

[Jared]

Yep. Need my chainsaw?

[Ryan]

Yeah. You throw a little danger into a chore and it kind of. I don't know, it just makes you feel good when you're all done with it.

[Miles]

When I really like trimming trees until I developed Loppers elbow.

[Ryan]

Yeah. That's not ideal.

[Miles]

I. You guys not. My elbow still hurts in certain movements. From Lopper's elbow. Yeah.

[Ryan]

Carrying a shotgun.

[Miles]

I'm like to the age now where I just randomly develop tendonitis.

[Tyler]

Is it like.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Is it like an ache or a sprain or what do you think?

[Miles]

So it's like.

[Jared]

Oh God. Doing that?

[Miles]

Well, no, it's like if I'm. If I, my arm is extended and I try and lift something, my elbow feels like it's going to burst out of its socket.

[Jared]

You're exercise scientist. What's the diagnosis?

[Miles]

I'm guessing tendinitis some sort. So just overuse injury. Because I was. They're like, if someone would have been in the woods but couldn't see me, they'd be like this guy's using a chainsaw. But I was just using a lopper.

[Jared]

Because you were screaming.

[Miles]

No, because I kept going.

[Jared]

I think the lopper and they saw.

[Miles]

The clippings flying up at such a high rate.

[Jared]

The Lopper is probably the least manly of all of the wood cutting tools. Let me take my really long handled scissors and clip this branch.

[Ryan]

And then sometimes if it like you get a little too confident that the lopper can like, it can take down you know like, let's say like a 4 or 5 inch.

[Miles]

What happened to me?

[Ryan]

And then you gotta like some. What I do is like I'll put one of the handles on my chest.

[Miles]

Oh.

[Ryan]

And then I'll, I'll grab the other handle with both hands and just like pull it into my chest.

[Miles]

I'll do that. I'll do that with my thigh, the one on the thigh and grab both hands and just let her rip. And that's how you get Lopper's elbow.

[Ryan]

Yep. So cutting shit with a chain with a chainsaw is like, it's kind of like an art.

[Jared]

They literally do chainsaw art.

[Ryan]

No. Yeah. Like you start like you go from the like just like carving and like swooping back and forth is.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Move. It was awesome.

[Ryan]

So carving and smoothing, I mean I.

[Miles]

Would say it's the same thing like painting like kind.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

If it's, if you are just in the groove painting, it's like art. Just like chainsawing you Fuck.

[Ryan]

You couldn't have been any more spot on, to be honest.

[Miles]

So, Jared, what about you setting mousetraps?

[Ryan]

What the fuck's going on here?

[Tyler]

Because when you get a mouse that you feel like a hero, like your.

[Miles]

Wife loves you, and it's very primal. It's like you get to be a trapper, but without having to go out in the woods and set traps all over the place.

[Jared]

It's domesticated trapping. Like you. You are finding an animal, trapping that animal and eliminating the animal. It just happens to be inside your house.

[Miles]

Are you a live trap guy or are you a sticky trap guy? A sticky trap.

[Jared]

So you like to let them starve?

[Miles]

See, I like to use the ones that you put a little peanut butter on the end.

[Ryan]

That's. That's what I got in my. In my shed right now.

[Miles]

We had one growing up in our basement that a mouse never ever went in. And my dad didn't change out the peanut butter for like the 20 years we had moved in there. So whatever was. It had to have been hard as shit. It's like, no wonder you're not getting a mouse. Yeah, it's like leaving food out on the counter for 20 years. You think a human's gonna come in.

[Jared]

And be like, hmm, an apple nummy?

[Ryan]

Yeah, Those little fuckers have gotten smart. The ones that I've been trying to catch in my shit, like, they'll lick the peanut butter off and not even get caught. I don't know if like.

[Jared]

Are you sure the trap set right?

[Ryan]

It's just. It's a.

[Miles]

It's actually shut and put it on the other side.

[Ryan]

It's like one of those pat. Like a Pac man trap.

[Jared]

So like the easy pre. They don't it. Not with the tripwire.

[Ryan]

Not with the tripwire. No. It's like you. It's like a chip clip. Damn near you just like.

[Miles]

Yeah. Plastic.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it's one of the black. It's called like black cat or something.

[Tyler]

Like claws on it.

[Ryan]

Yep, yep. I mean, I've caught my. I've caught my fair share. But also sometimes I'll go in there and be like the fox eating my. This peanut butter.

[Tyler]

I literally did a little block of cheese one time and it worked.

[Ryan]

Really?

[Jared]

Oh, yeah.

[Ryan]

Nice, Nice.

[Jared]

Did you make it a triangle?

[Tyler]

I think it was like a little square.

[Miles]

I mean, to piggyback on that one. Jared beating the shit out of a vole with a shovel.

[Tyler]

That would be fun.

[Ryan]

It's gotta be a good feeling.

[Miles]

Have you Guys ever done it?

[Jared]

I've never beat a vole.

[Tyler]

It's like, whack a wol.

[Jared]

I think I've stomped a mouse, but never beat a vol.

[Miles]

When I got done, dude, I had so much adrenaline going, and I felt like I, like, put me in an octagon. I'm ready to go.

[Jared]

What's the biggest animal you could kill in an octagon?

[Miles]

Honestly, I don't know if I just, like, blacked out and just went to a new level of some sort, but Ann was like, I don't. I don't. I didn't like that.

[Ryan]

You didn't find that, man.

[Miles]

I was like, I was defending your honor.

[Jared]

Almost got you.

[Ryan]

You want voles in our house now?

[Jared]

Good.

[Tyler]

Nasty infection.

[Miles]

It also didn't help that it came directly after and picked up the voltrap. Looked inside of it, there was a volt in it, and she threw it and hit me in the back with it. Some might have also had something to do with it.

[Ryan]

You were. You had to have been pissed.

[Miles]

What are you doing?

[Tyler]

They have gerbs.

[Ryan]

My number two is also resetting mousetraps, so.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Ryan]

Good one, Joe. We're on the same page.

[Miles]

One of my favorite manly chores is moving something from one location to the next. In terms of one, you get to strap it down.

[Ryan]

Sure.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

And strapping stuff down is just the best. There's just something so satisfying about getting that strap nice and tight, saying, it's not going anywhere.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And then on the hold drive over there, all you do is look in your rearview mirror to make sure it's not going anywhere. Then there's, you know, it's not going anywhere, but you gotta stare at it the whole time.

[Jared]

I forgot that that was the worst part of the moving is just constantly worrying if something was going to blow out of the back of my truck for an hour.

[Miles]

Yeah. Like, you hook up a trailer, you. You double check it, you get into your thing, you start driving, you're like, God, did I put the chains on that?

[Jared]

Yep. It's the worst.

[Ryan]

Or you, like, put some in a closed trailer. Like. Like, God, do I need to strap that down or not?

[Jared]

Is it going to tip over in there?

[Ryan]

If you decide not strap down, then you're just, like, white knuckling the entire way. Yeah.

[Miles]

But, yeah, it's just some. Because in reality, there's not a ton of work going on other than the initial lifting and loading and unloading. But it's like a good. It depends on where you're driving. It could be Like a whole hour project. I'm not really doing much. A lot of window time. You just get to listen to some music, hang out.

[Jared]

It almost gives you the authority to nod at other semi drivers.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah. Pulling a trailer where.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Closest thing we're ever going to get to.

[Miles]

Yeah. I usually honk at them when I go by.

[Ryan]

If you're trying to be. If you got a bunch of stuff to move too, you're trying to be efficient and get as much stuff in the tailgate as possible.

[Miles]

There is a Tetris aspect to putting stuff into a trailer.

[Ryan]

I love packing the back of a truck full of stuff.

[Jared]

Oh, yeah.

[Ryan]

Just to see what I can do.

[Miles]

Plus, it's also one of those chores that your wife has no idea how long it should take.

[Ryan]

Correct?

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You know, so if, like I'm bringing something from my house to the office, you know, I load it up, strap it down, then maybe I swing to the gas station, get an energy drink or something. Then I go to the office, then I take a shit, you know, then I unstrap it, then go get a snack, then I unload it, Then I have to, you know, roll the tarp back on my truck. The whole thing, it's just. It's just a nice. It's like it's the equivalent of a nice Sunday drive in the chore world.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Just moving stuff from point A to.

[Ryan]

Point B to start things off too. You may not even have like the right length of strap or the right durability of straps. You might have to go to the. You might have to go to the store.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Get new straps.

[Miles]

100%. Yeah.

[Ryan]

Also, if a strap is disconnected from like the. Like the clamp deal, I'm just. I'm either gonna go get a new strap from the hardware store or I'm just loop it back through and I. It's more so of like the. Ah. I don't know if like this strap go.

[Miles]

Every time, though. A strap comes out from the. From the ratchet it. I never put it in right the first time.

[Tyler]

No, it's like a USB drive.

[Ryan]

You gotta look at another one to see. It's like the air filter.

[Miles]

It's 100%. It's like you put it through. You're like, that wasn't the right way. I just do it and you just do it. Good. The next one.

[Jared]

But I tie a knot into the end, the very end of all my ratchet straps, so you can't pull it out.

[Miles]

That's really smart, actually.

[Ryan]

The first time I ever had to like re loop a ratchet strap. I. It was like, it was like if I was trying to decipher Goodwill hunting on the white on like the chalkboard.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

I had no idea. I like, I was, I was feeding that sucker through places it didn't even need to belong. But once you do it, you know, you do it once the next time. Yeah. It's self taught.

[Tyler]

Not going anywhere.

[Miles]

So. Yeah. What about you?

[Jared]

I have one. My number two is kind of similar to the mousetraps, but it's just killing spiders. It's always because you're coming to the rescue, you know that someone is scared of that spider and you gotta go take it out.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Whether kids kill spiders yet the middle one does. The older one is kind of a pussy.

[Ryan]

He's gonna listen, he's gonna listen to this someday.

[Miles]

He mark that Jared. And for his like 12th kid's 12th birthday, get him a card and then say listen to episode whatever and put the timestamp.

[Jared]

Hey buddy, if you're listening to this in 18 years, I hope you've manned up a little bit. Well because by four years old you are terrified of spiders.

[Ryan]

Really?

[Jared]

Yes.

[Ryan]

We play a stomp game with ants out in the driveway. Me and my two and a half year old.

[Jared]

Nice.

[Ryan]

And we just like, we see who can kill the most ants.

[Jared]

What's the record?

[Miles]

Yeah, who usually fuck.

[Ryan]

I don't know. I can't.

[Miles]

I.

[Jared]

You gotta be careful with those ants.

[Miles]

So don't want to be in your question. Ryan, who usually wins? Do you let him win or do you win?

[Tyler]

Good question.

[Ryan]

He's not, I'm not going to let him win until he can actually beat me.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Jared]

So I'm totally with that. I'll let him stay close, let him stay in it. But I'm not letting them win.

[Ryan]

Yeah, and I'll maybe let both pussies. I'll maybe let him win in like in a non competitive whatever. But if, if it's me against you, I'm. I, I will win.

[Jared]

We've been playing beyblades a lot lately. I don't even let them win in those.

[Tyler]

Hell yeah.

[Miles]

Isn't that like pretty up to chance?

[Jared]

No, I just rip it way harder than him.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Ryan]

What is beyblades?

[Jared]

They're like tops. You just pull top and smash each other.

[Ryan]

Yeah, we did a wishbone the other day and I, I'm like, I'm getting the bigger part of the wishbone when we break it.

[Miles]

That one actually you have no control over.

[Ryan]

I mean you do like the Whole.

[Miles]

Point is it's a 50. 50 deal. Yeah.

[Ryan]

If your hands are in the correct spot, it's like arm wrestling. You curl the wrist right away, you get a better chance.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

It's 50. 50 if both sides have equal knowledge on how to set up a wishbone.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

But if you know more, you're going to get the wish.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Yep.

[Miles]

You already said you're number two.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I was resetting mousetraps. Yep. Same Jared.

[Miles]

Jared.

[Tyler]

I've always said this because I'd already seen a female do it, but replacing wiper blades on a vehicle.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah.

[Jared]

That's a pretty good one, actually. I don't think I have either.

[Tyler]

That's kind of tricky too.

[Miles]

I'm be honest. I think I've only done it once in my life.

[Tyler]

I always forget how.

[Miles]

In high school, it was one of the little, like rubber strips had just come off and I just let it flop. Flipping, flopping around.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I hope it doesn't rain. I need some new wipers and Tyler does it every two weeks.

[Jared]

If I remember correctly, I do it pretty much every. Not every oil exchange. Once a yearish.

[Tyler]

Well, no, because you have a Christmas.

[Ryan]

I need new wiper blades right now. And every time I see my wiper blades, I think about you.

[Jared]

Right.

[Ryan]

And the new wiper blades that you have.

[Jared]

So I should be getting some new ones here in a couple weeks.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

In my stocking.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Jared]

My number one is not shoveling snow. Not snow blowing, but plowing snow. You gotta plow. And you plow your driveway. That's manly.

[Miles]

And you can get it.

[Jared]

Plowing's manly, Ryan. You can't laugh at that.

[Miles]

I mean, a good plow will make you a man.

[Tyler]

That feels good.

[Ryan]

Yeah. If you head over to Plowtown, it's gonna be a good day.

[Miles]

I think the best part about plowing snow, about plowing is the little rip curl you get off the end of the plow.

[Ryan]

Ye like riding away.

[Miles]

Like you could. If you. If you had a surfboard, you could fucking surf that thing all the way down the drill.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Or like smoking a cigarette.

[Jared]

Johnny Tsunami.

[Miles]

Yeah. So I would agree with that. That's fun. My number one. I hope you guys agree with this one. This is my number one. This is the manly. The. The chore that as a man I like to do the most. And that is. And I got to do it last weekend. Pack and unpack my hunting gear. I love going down in my basement where all my hunting gear is, my gun safe is. And pretending like I am Going into war and. And making sure I got all the supplies. You know, you check the binoculars to make sure they work.

[Jared]

You're not bringing binoculars? Fence.

[Miles]

No. Deer hunting. Deer hunting. But I. But I probably should bring binoculars because you gotta be prepared. If anyone knows anything about war, it's that you gotta be prepared for anything. That's what they say anyways. And even further, I love the best is when all of the hunting stuff is exactly where you left it. That doesn't happen.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Some years you're like, I don't know where my hunting pants are. What. What closet are they in? Are they. Do I even own them anymore? They at Goodwill? I don't know. But I was able to have everything in the right spot this year. And the best is when you take your guns out and you. If it's a shotgun, you pop open the. You. You break the over under just to click it open and closed a few times to make sure it still works. You got to sim out. You pull the thing back, make sure it's unloaded. Nine mil. Yep.

[Jared]

Nine.

[Miles]

Miller. Make sure it's unloaded. Check. Make sure everything's working good.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Just that sound of. Yeah. The sound of a gun opening and closing is just the best.

[Jared]

Dude, the. I think if we were doing manliest sounds. It's a bolt action rifle. Is the manliest sound.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Or a pump shotgun.

[Miles]

Yeah. You're in the basement. You just maybe got to pull it up to your shoulders to make sure it all still works. Good.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Get a bead on the window or like a tree out the window or something.

[Miles]

Well, I don't usually try and point it at other houses.

[Jared]

That's your own house.

[Ryan]

You're not pointing at another house. You're getting a beat at something in the sky or you know, it's.

[Miles]

Someone'S. Like the neighbors, like in their yard, they look through the window. I'm just pointing a shotgun at them.

[Jared]

Looking at my window for.

[Ryan]

You got a buddy who just got a new rifle or new scope, whatever, and you throw that thing up on your shoulder. You gotta put those crosshairs on something. Not a. I'm not saying not a house or a person or even a neighbor's dog, but even like a fence post. A fence post out the back window.

[Miles]

Now it sounds like you point your guns at neighbor's dog.

[Jared]

No.

[Miles]

When you say it like that.

[Tyler]

Or their cats.

[Miles]

But yeah, you. So you get. You're. You're checking the guns, make sure they're unloaded. You're seeing if they're still got, you know, they still feel good in your hands. You load up all your gear and you're walking out to the truck. You. I feel like that scene in Lone Survivor when they get off the helicopter and they're walking with all their gear. That's what I feel like every single time. Time it is. And then you get to do the same when you get home.

[Jared]

It's. You're.

[Ryan]

You're.

[Jared]

You're totally right. But it's such a weird thing. That's the only time doing laundry is manly.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah.

[Miles]

You're folding it all night.

[Jared]

Yeah. You're packing it in there real nice. You're. You're literally planning your outfit.

[Ryan]

Yeah. You got four pairs of gloves, four pairs of hats.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Miles]

You guys ever, like, you've wore the same hunting gear for how many years? Do you guys still, like, will pop on like a coat or something just to make sure it all fits good still? No, I did that with my chaps this year. I just popped them on over my jeans, went upstairs, got a big laugh out of hand. Yeah, well.

[Ryan]

And you went through a quite, you know, transformation yourself. So you got to just make sure.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

We had to stop.

[Miles]

Yeah. Do it. Throw some hunting gear on while you're doing it. Try.

[Jared]

Not right these.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Just make sure I still got the strength to carry in a box of shells in my vest.

[Miles]

Well, that's like. I feel like such a badass loading all my shells into a, like, ammo bag and like, organizing them. And like, I have extra pistol clips in there, even though I'm not even bringing a pistol on this one. But it just looks cool in there.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah. No, I get it. It's like, that's something. I do all that in the garage. So I got stuff laid out all over, like my gym mats of, you know, this outfit with this sweatshi case. It's too cold or windy.

[Miles]

I.

[Ryan]

You got options.

[Miles]

And I also got a gun cleaning kit, you know, so after the hunt, you know, you go down the basement, you lay it all out, and you start cleaning the gun and you just. I feel so, like, distinguished standing there with a rag with some gun oil on it, just going like this, thinking deeply about life, you know, in front of the fire.

[Ryan]

I mean, I got absolutely in this whole segment because my top, my manliest chore that men can do is cleaning. Cleaning guns. So you took that, my number one, you took my number two, and you took my number three.

[Jared]

I took half.

[Miles]

Well, like, maybe, like have an original idea.

[Ryan]

I mean, haven't touched it.

[Miles]

It's been there.

[Ryan]

It's the manliest chore on my list is clean cleaning guns. Because, I mean, you kind of just laid it all out. If you got. You got to pump that shotgun a couple times, make sure the oil gets on in all the cracks and creases. You got to pull that pistol clip back. You got a bolt action rifle back and forth. Yeah. You want any other explanation? Just rewind to what Miles just said.

[Tyler]

So my last one is like any sort of like demolition. So it's like pulling out a tree with like a four wheeler or like that's sick. Or using like an ice cream, like the ice scraper for the driveway and like, like demolishing ice.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

We redid our. Some stuff in our cabin and I got to tear out a wall like a drywall. And an took a video of me taking a sledgehammer, putting it through the sheetrock and I like, put a hole in it and then I stuck my head through and the smile on my face. It's like having a kid punching through sheetrock and then getting married.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Like, top three happiest moments of my life.

[Tyler]

Cleaning the guns for.

[Miles]

I clean the guns for. Well, yeah. Putting on your chaps. I've.

[Ryan]

Now I've never.

[Miles]

I love a good chap. I couldn't be happier that I'm a chap guy. I forgot I was a chap guy too.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Almost bought new hunting pants this year. And then I went down the basement, saw my chaps sitting there. I was like, what an idiot.

[Jared]

Completely forgot asked or.

[Ryan]

No, no. Ass.

[Jared]

It's good.

[Miles]

Assless. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ryan]

I've never gotten to be part of a demolition of drywall.

[Jared]

Me either.

[Ryan]

I believe. I believe it.

[Miles]

Why don't we just buy some and then run through it?

[Ryan]

We just built some studs.

[Jared]

We did that video back in the old bunker. Ryan running through insulation foam.

[Ryan]

Yeah. It's not as fun.

[Miles]

You know, I remember that. All right. What was. What was. What did you say that you like to demo or like pulling out a.

[Tyler]

Tree with like a four wheeler or like.

[Miles]

Yeah, that is hell.

[Ryan]

That's fun.

[Miles]

Hell, you've never done it, but hell, yeah.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that's fun. I mean, yeah, that. Because then you get. Then you got the chains out. And when you get chains involved with pulling chains versus, like, versus a strap or oversized, like, chains are eliminated.

[Miles]

That's why you like chainsaws so much.

[Jared]

Nothing excites me.

[Miles]

It wouldn't. It would be lame if it was a. If it was a race Rope saw.

[Ryan]

Oh, it'd be dumb. Yeah. I just gotta get chainsaw.

[Miles]

Makes it so much cooler.

[Jared]

What about whips? Do chains and whips excite you?

[Ryan]

I knew you were going there.

[Jared]

I'm curious.

[Ryan]

Chains and whips excite me.

[Miles]

La la la. Come on. I usually just use them separately, so I'm gonna need to.

[Jared]

You gotta.

[Miles]

You know, we'll try it out together.

[Jared]

Yeah. Get you whipped into shape.

[Ryan]

You ever had a cut?

[Miles]

Laugh at that. That wasn't even good.

[Jared]

That was great.

[Ryan]

You ever had a cut chain before?

[Jared]

No.

[Ryan]

That's sweet too. It's kind of like you use a. We'll call it an oversized lopper.

[Miles]

Like a bolt cutter. You're talking. Yeah, yeah.

[Ryan]

Oversized lopper.

[Jared]

No, yeah, it's oversized lopper. Not a bolt cutter.

[Ryan]

A bolt cutter, Dude.

[Miles]

We're.

[Ryan]

We're lopper guys.

[Miles]

I. Well, yeah, yeah.

[Jared]

You've oversized or oversized lopper? Elbow.

[Miles]

That's true. Well, mine was just a normal size lopper.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Yeah. So.

[Miles]

Well, is that it, boys?

[Jared]

I think so.

[Tyler]

I got.

[Miles]

You got two fun facts.

[Tyler]

During prohibition, moonshiners would wear cow shoes. The footwear left hoof prints instead of footprints. Helping distillers and smugglers evade the police.

[Miles]

So smart.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Ryan]

Interesting.

[Jared]

I think I've seen a picture of those somewhere.

[Tyler]

I don't have a.

[Jared]

They kind of look like high heels.

[Miles]

I mean, that would have been nice to be able to see them if you would have forced ahead of time.

[Tyler]

My bad.

[Miles]

It's very. It's a very visual fact. I just throwing that out there, though.

[Tyler]

Yeah, my bad.

[Miles]

I brought. I have my visual of the video at the beginning of the episode. I did my work before. I foresaw Ryan going. I'd like to see the video of my high school tape. So I brought it.

[Jared]

This is what the soul of the couch so far away. It's like a high heel where the back heel is a hoof print and the toes are also a hoof print.

[Ryan]

That's so smart.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

The Russian team derived late to the 1908 London Olympics due to a difference between the Julian and the Gregorian calendars.

[Miles]

What was. What. What happened?

[Ryan]

Like, what calendar were they on? And what.

[Tyler]

Yeah, like they're still using the Julian calendar, which lagged 12 days behind the Gregorian calendar.

[Miles]

And so how late were they?

[Tyler]

12 days.

[Ryan]

The Olympics is like so three weeks.

[Miles]

No one called them after day one was like 19.

[Jared]

Oh, what?

[Tyler]

1908.

[Ryan]

I mean, I think you could send a pigeon in a couple days. Where was the Olympics in 1908?

[Tyler]

London.

[Ryan]

Wonder how far that fly is where.

[Tyler]

The curl flies, I don't know.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that sucks.

[Jared]

I mean, the phone was invented.

[Miles]

Good thing daylight savings didn't happen during that too. They had been all sorts of up.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So I wonder how many people just missed their event.

[Ryan]

Imagine. Jesus.

[Jared]

Entire country.

[Miles]

They had to have had radio communication back then.

[Jared]

They did. The. The phone was invented in 1876.

[Tyler]

Oh, okay.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah. Give him a ring.

[Tyler]

Russia sent only six athletes who competed in four events. They did not win any gold medals, secured just one medal, a silver medal.

[Miles]

Fucking take that, Russia.

[Ryan]

Can you imagine juicing all year for the Olympics and then just being it.

[Miles]

Because it's a Gregorian calendar just waiting.

[Jared]

To release all of your roid rage and you don't get to.

[Ryan]

Yeah, just all the shrinkage that you're going through and you're like, this is for nothing.

[Miles]

All the. All the clean piss you had to track down.

[Jared]

I'm going to go get for.

[Miles]

Not now. You just have a fridge full of piss.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

For no reason. Freezing. I don't know if you keep pissing the fridge or not, but.

[Tyler]

Right.

[Jared]

No, you got to keep it.

[Miles]

What would your college buddies do?

[Ryan]

Well, they would just put it in a. Probably in an ice mountain bottle. But then you. Then you. Then you have the issue of like, if you're walking around.

[Tyler]

Oh, yeah.

[Ryan]

Like you don't want the. An athletic trainer to hear this while you go in the bathroom.

[Tyler]

That's true.

[Ryan]

So that did happen too.

[Miles]

I only got drug tested one time in college. Guys fucking breathing down my neck.

[Ryan]

Imagine if you had a bottle in your pan.

[Miles]

I thought he was maybe like going to give me. Trim my neck hair while he's back there. It's so close.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it's like. It's like on the window when it's cold and like drawn something in there. He's going to do that to your neck.

[Miles]

I should have said. Don't act like you're not impressed. I'm just rock hard while you're breathing on my neck.

[Tyler]

Dud, would you completely miss the cup in your.

[Ryan]

Now I gotta come back tomorrow.

[Miles]

I literally have the cup facing like this and it's just pouring out of it while going in it. Well, don't breathe in my ear like that, but close my eyes. It's all the same, you know?

[Ryan]

Yeah. No, I don't have to pay.

[Miles]

You have a very womanly breath.

[Tyler]

It's a good way to get out of a pestilence.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Good way to buy some time.

[Miles]

Just accuse him. Accuse him for coming on to you.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Go straight to the cranberry juice after.

[Ryan]

Or just call your call buddy. Buddy on campus.

[Tyler]

Aluminum bottle, please.

[Miles]

Yeah. You can guarantee we go pee again, he ain't gonna be looking.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Then you're in the clear.

[Ryan]

Not only are you in the clear, your piss is also clear.

[Miles]

Tip for anyone trying to pass a drug test, just get rock hard beforehand. Well, guys, thanks for tuning into another episode of the you bet your radio podcast. May your chores be mainly. And may your hotels be free of lambs and goat and lambs and goats and bedbugs and sheep. Cheers, Ryan.

[Ryan]

Oh, my.

[Jared's Friend]

Out in the field chasing pheasants in the dawn Stayed in a sketchy hotel till the daylight show Bedroom guard by bed bugs biting while we slept Sheep in the distance they don't know the secrets kept stutter us relaying the floor Tyler burns the pizza laughs more and more Miles with his elbow can lift a thing Melee chores and chainsaws the joy they bring Brian steals our ideas Keeps them all to self locked in Pheasant hunting lies still on the shelf Chainsaws, roaring, cutting through the trees Life on the farm brought down to its knees Studs to rock we're laying the floor Tyler burns the pizza laugh more and more Miles with his elbow can lift a thing Melee, chores and chainsaws the joy they bring Loppers and pants Miles making his way.

[Miles]

Through the pasture.

[Jared's Friend]

And break the day Rugged hair doing what they can A country life for every woman and man starts to rust we're laying the floor Tyler burns the pizza to laugh more and more more and more Mouth with his elbow can lift a thing Melee, chores and chainsaws the joy they bring.

[Miles]

The joy they.

[Ann]

Bring.

[Tyler]

What'S something your husbands do that make you go, oh, hell yeah?

[Megan]

Grill. Hell yeah.

[Ann]

Hell yeah there's nothing better than, like, a summer grill, like, meal.

[Megan]

I agree.

[Ann]

And, like, then you don't have to do anything in the kitchen. You don't have to prep anything. It's all just done. Done. It's the best. So I'm very excited.

[Tyler's Wife]

I would say, like, any housework, washing bottles.

[Megan]

Oh, yeah. Hell, yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ann]

Hell, yeah.

[Tyler's Wife]

Hell yeah.

[Megan]

I don't know. What about, like, man stuff, like cutting branches down?

[Tyler's Wife]

Okay, to that point. So we just bought a house, right?

[Ann]

Yeah.

[Tyler's Wife]

Went and looked at it on Tuesday. There's a chainsaw in the garage.

[Ann]

Ooh, just. Did Ryan start?

[Tyler's Wife]

Yeah, I think Tyler left it. He got so excited.

[Ann]

Oh, my God.

[Tyler's Wife]

Because we haven't been able to do that stuff.

[Ann]

That's true.

[Tyler's Wife]

So he's excited to take that chainsaw and cut down some trees.

[Ann]

Some trees and stuff? Yeah. Some branches? Yeah.

[Megan]

Hell yeah.

[Tyler's Wife]

Hell yeah.

[Ann]

Yeah. So Miles's brother and sister in law just had a baby the same time we did. And she was like, I wish she would do the. Wash the bottles more, you know, whatever. And then so every time Miles does the bottles, which is like, not often at all, like maybe once a month or something, he's like, take a video of me and send it to them. So they think I'm doing the bottles and like making them look bad and all this stuff. I'm like, oh, my God.

[Megan]

So did you.

[Ann]

Yeah, I did. Deleted right away, but yeah.

[Tyler]

Bart Ender, if. If a female text you back the letter K, is she actually mad or are. Or are us men overreacting?

[Megan]

I would say like 80% chance she's pissed.

[Ann]

Yeah.

[Megan]

Unless I think the exception is like she's working, she's in a hurry, busy with a baby or. Yeah, in a hurry or something. There are exceptions, but I would say fat chance she's mad or she's above.

[Ann]

The age of a certain amount where it's like, you know, like how a dad just responds with a thumbs up. It's like a mom's version of just like. Sounds good. Yep, yep, Got it. Yeah, that's a good way of putting it.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Ann]

Because I would never send just K. I don't think.

[Tyler's Wife]

I think I would just not respond.

[Ann]

Yeah. If you were just going to send K. Yeah.

[Megan]

I think I would give it a thumbs up.

[Ann]

Yeah.

[Megan]

On the text.

[Miles]

Right.

[Tyler]

Even though it's a thumbs down in your head.

[Ryan]

Yeah, exactly.

[Megan]

Jared gets it.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

They're in trouble.

[Miles]

Oh, Dee.

[Tyler]

Okay. Yeah. What's one thing your kid does that annoys you? Because it's just like your husband.

[Tyler's Wife]

Oh, I got a good one.

[Ann]

What is it?

[Tyler's Wife]

Socks.

[Jared]

My.

[Tyler's Wife]

Okay, so he gets home, sits on the couch, takes the socks off off, throws them in the corner of the living room.

[Ann]

Oh, yeah.

[Tyler's Wife]

My children now, immediately in the entryway, take their shoes off, takes their socks off, and they just chuck them downstairs. I'm thinking boys yelling at them to pick up their socks.

[Ann]

Oh, no, I. I can't blame them because I do the same thing. Like, I'll be laying in bed, not going to bed. I'll just be laying in bed. I'll grab my socks and just chuck them across the room. And I was like, what are you doing? And I'm like, can't wear socks to bed. Yeah, yeah.

[Ryan]

No.

[Ann]

So I'm with them. Sorry. But that is annoying. That is annoying.

[Tyler's Wife]

And imagine just a grown man. And three times.

[Ann]

I was gonna say, that's a lot of socks. That's four socks. Four pairs of socks in one sitting.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler's Wife]

And it's immediately after taking the shoes off.

[Megan]

Our little guy has started. Like, Ryan is. We talked earlier about the sounds Ryan's, like, training him to make sounds. So, like, there's a few that he started to do. So the sound that I made earlier, Cal will do sometimes. And then there's, like, a UFC clip of this guy. Have you seen this, Jared? It's the chi wee wee guy.

[Tyler]

I'm not familiar.

[Ann]

Oh, okay.

[Megan]

Well, he goes, like, 1, 2, 3, Chiwi Wee, super loud and obnoxious. And Ryan's, like, got him trained to do that every time he goes, 1, 2, 3. So Chi Wee wee.

[Miles]

Oh, my God.

[Megan]

And then anytime Cal gets in, like, a big area where he can, like, hear his voice and it echoes back, he'll do that.

[Ann]

Oh, no.

[Megan]

I don't know how to correct that.

[Tyler]

Yeah, there's. Yeah, you're kind of stuck on that.

[Ann]

Well, it's like, one of those things that it's not going to, like, affect his future. No. You know, like, it's not like, a behavior thing or it's just, like, a stupid sound that he's going to make forever. Right.

[Megan]

As long as he hides it from his future wife.

[Ann]

He's not going to find a wife because he makes these weird sounds, develop.

[Tyler]

Into type 2 Tourette's.

[Megan]

Yeah, it's kind of Tourette's.

[Tyler's Wife]

Like, it's got to be a proud moment for Ryan.

[Megan]

Yeah, I think it is.

[Ann]

Yeah.

[Megan]

Well, Ann, you're.

[Ann]

You're.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ann]

He's, like, so small.

[Megan]

Five months old.

[Ann]

Yeah. That, like, there's no traits that he essentially has.

[Megan]

What's he do? That's annoying. A Mile spits up a lot.

[Ann]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Drools.

[Ann]

Drools. No, the first thing that came to mind was just he ignores me. So Miles.

[Megan]

Miles is teaching him to ignore.

[Ann]

Yeah, yeah, Miles. He literally will just be sitting there, not even, like, on his phone or anything. He's just kind of sitting there, and I'll, like, say something to him and ask him a question, and then I'm not kidding. Three, four, five minutes later, he'll answer the question, and I'll be like, I asked that. And I'll be doing something else.

[Megan]

I'll be like, totally forgot.

[Ann]

And then you've been asked a question.

[Miles]

Right.

[Ann]

I'll be totally moved on from it. And he'll answer and I'm like, I asked that so long ago.

[Tyler]

It was yesterday. Yeah, you asked like, what do you want for supper today?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Ann]

Yeah. Oh, my God. So annoying.

[Miles]

Guys, if you want more, you bet your radio, you gotta check out our Patreon. You gotta go to patreon.com, you bet your radio, or look us up on the app. And we have hundreds of hours of other episodes on there that you can't get unless you're signed up. So you got to check us out on Patreon. You bet your radio, baby.