What Our Superpower Would Be

Summary

Podcast Summary: You Betcha Radio

Episode: What Our Superpower Would Be

Date: September 15, 2025
Host: Myles the You Betcha Guy
Regulars: Ryan, Tyler, Jerrod
Theme: The Midwest crew gamely debates which superpowers they'd love to have—if only every power came with a ridiculous side effect picked by the next person in line.

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Episode Overview

In this laugh-filled episode, the You Betcha gang imagines which superpower they’d choose—if a friend got to saddle it with a dubious side effect. The conversation blends classic Midwest humor, playful roasting, and tongue-in-cheek hypotheticals, with each host building on the other’s ideas. The segment moves organically from one wild possibility to another, veering into creatively hilarious scenarios for each chosen power.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Format: Power and Side Effect (00:00–01:37)

• Ryan introduces the game's premise: "You get to pick a superpower, but the person on your left picks the side effect that comes along with it." (00:00)
• The team quickly warms to the concept, appreciating the chaos of unexpected "rules" with each power.

2. Tyler's Superpower: No Need for Sleep (01:17–01:41)

• Tyler picks: "Never, ever have to sleep... never feel fatigued." (00:19)
  • Tyler enthuses: "I could run for 30 days straight. Never get tired, never have to sleep." (00:39)
• Ryan jokingly ties the side effect to 24-hour pizza: "Domino's comes out with 24 hour delivery." (00:45)
  • Tyler is gleeful: "So you're saying like, the side effect is that I can get a job at Domino's?" (01:05)
  • They quip about late-night bingeing and side effects that are more reward than peril.

3. Guest's Superpower: Teleportation With a Twist (01:45–02:29)

• Guest picks: "Able to teleport anywhere—in time, too?" (01:45–01:53)
• Ryan adds a brutal side effect: "Every time you teleport, you... get diarrhea." (02:00)
  • An immediate workaround is proposed: "But if I’m aware of that, I’ll just have a diaper on. Captain Diaper Man." (02:17)
  • The crew rolls with it, naming new superhero alter egos: "Diaper man," "Dr. Diaper Waffle Stop." (05:08)

4. Ryan's Superpower: Running on Water (02:29–03:40)

• Ryan: “I could run through the ocean. Like, I could walk on water, basically.” (02:29)
• Side effect: “If you want to walk on water, you cannot go below 3 mph or you will die.” (03:08)
  • Ryan meditates: “Okay, I can deal with that on the water.” (03:18)
• The team muses about fishing, safety, and the hazard of never stopping: "He can't stop. That sucks. Totally null and voids the coolness." (03:43–03:46)
• They riff Midwest style on ice fishing, trolling, and the dangers of always moving.

5. Absurd Solutions and Midwest Ingenuity (04:00–05:34)

• Guest: “If I wanted to teleport anywhere, I would teleport... to a bathroom specifically so I could just leave.” (04:00)
  • Tyler: "...make the time capsule also a shower." (04:11)
  • The resulting idea: "The capsule is a shower." (04:32)
• The group improvises the logistics of superhero hygiene—“Waffle Stopper 9000,” “Dr. Diaper Waffle Stop”—and debate cleanup techniques. (05:06–05:27)
• Notable aside: “Just the cleanest superhero, but he’s clean because he’s also the dirtiest superhero.” (05:34, Tyler)

6. The Host’s Superpower: Invisibility, With a Catch (05:50–07:17)

• Host: "I'll do invisibility so I can Irish goodbye easier..." (05:50)
• Tyler drops the side effect bomb: “But every time you’re not invisible, you just have a raging boner.” (05:56)
  • Host accepts it: "I could just wear compression shorts every day. Jeans, jeans, jeans." (06:10)
  • The team cracks up imagining the problems: "Just imagine if he's invisible, then goes uninvisible in a place he's not supposed to be, and he just appears with a raging like a school... How alarming that would be for everyone." (06:24, Tyler)
• The origin story: “Your first boner. You were so embarrassed that you wanted to become invisible.” (07:00, Tyler & Guest)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Tyler: “I could run for 30 days straight. Never get tired, never have to sleep.” (00:39)
• Ryan: "Every time you teleport, you have you your pants, you get diarrhea." (02:00)
• Tyler: “You be diaper man.” (02:22)
• On the running on water side effect:
  • Host: “If you want to walk on water, you cannot go below 3 mph or you will be shot or you'll die.” (03:08)
• Tyler and others on practical superhero fixes:
  • “...make the time capsule also a shower.” (04:11)
  • “Waffle Stopper 9000... Dr. Diaper Waffle Stop.” (05:06–05:08)
• Host on invisibility: “I could…just wear compression shorts every day. Jeans, jeans, jeans.” (06:10)
• On the invisibility origin:
  • Tyler: "Your first boner. You were so embarrassed that you wanted to become invisible." (07:00)

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The You Betcha Midwest Vibe & Humor

• The group’s banter revolves around Midwest sensibilities (late-night pizza, fishing, running on lakes, problem-solving with duct tape and diapers).
• Their running jokes about hygiene, bodily functions, and how to work around ludicrous side effects reflect a laid-back but creative Midwest attitude.

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:00–01:37: Game explained, Tyler picks sleeplessness.
• 01:45–02:29: Guest chooses teleportation, faces diarrhea.
• 02:29–03:40: Ryan picks running on water, stuck at 3 mph minimum.
• 04:00–05:34: Superhero workaround brainstorming (shower capsules, hygiene hacks).
• 05:50–07:17: Host goes for invisibility, has to cope with a perpetual visible side effect.
• 06:24–07:00: Imagining hilariously awkward consequences and origin stories.

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Conclusion

Filled with quick wit, good-natured ribbing, and self-aware humor, this episode of You Betcha Radio turns a classic “which superpower would you have?” game into a uniquely Midwest comedy sketch. Each host leans into the bit, building on the others’ ideas in ways that are both absurd and surprisingly logical, ensuring a laugh every minute—especially for those who love their superpowers with a side of relatable ridiculousness.

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[End of Content Summary]

Transcript

[Ryan]

You get to pick a superpower, but the person on your left picks the side effect that comes along with it.

[Tyler]

Oh, so I get to pick yours.

[Host]

You get. I get to pick my power. You get to pick the side effect.

[Tyler]

All right, I will pick my power. You get to pick side effect. Okay.

[Host]

I.

[Tyler]

Choose the superpower to never, ever have to sleep in my. Never feel fatigued. I think I've said that on this podcast. If I could pick a superpower, I would just always have the same amount of energy at all times. Doesn't matter how far I ran. I just, I would never have to sleep.

[Ryan]

I could run.

[Tyler]

I could run for 30 days straight. Never get tired, never have to sleep.

[Guest]

So now I have to pick the side effect. Domino's comes out with 24 hour delivery.

[Ryan]

Really?

[Tyler]

You could have picked.

[Host]

Don't they already have that?

[Ryan]

Essentially they do.

[Host]

They have 24 hour delivery.

[Tyler]

Let's go. I'm sitting. Good. So you're saying like, the side effect is that I can get a job at Domino's?

[Guest]

No, that you could just like. Or you could order a pizza at 3:30am while you're binging. Got the side effect.

[Tyler]

Should have been that I could only eat.

[Guest]

See, it's tough going first because then you start to talk about rules more and get more in depth with it. Well, no, I, I, you know, you said it already.

[Tyler]

That's great.

[Guest]

I know. I just, I don't think you could resist 24 hour delivery.

[Tyler]

What's your superpower?

[Guest]

Let's see. My superpower would probably be able to teleport anywhere.

[Tyler]

Anywhere in current time or back in time or forward everything. Okay.

[Ryan]

Every time you teleport, you have you your pants, you get diarrhea.

[Tyler]

I mean, how long does he get diarrhea for? Like, is this like a one time or like the whole rest of the day? He's got diarrhea.

[Ryan]

Like, right after he gets the. Out of the capsule. You.

[Tyler]

You just shit your pants in the capsule?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Guest]

But if I'm aware of that, I'll just have a diaper on.

[Host]

Sure. There's ways around it.

[Tyler]

So you be diaper man.

[Guest]

Yeah, Captain Diaper Man.

[Ryan]

Like, I could run through the ocean. Like, I could walk on water, basically.

[Tyler]

You can walk on water?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Host]

Jesus.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Aquaman.

[Ryan]

I could, like, sprint across water too.

[Host]

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So the side effect, you know, I chose this.

[Tyler]

His origin story is that he almost drowned as a kid because he can't swim.

[Ryan]

So superheroes work.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Guest]

You could go fishing without even needing a boat.

[Ryan]

Right.

[Guest]

That'd actually be kind of sick.

[Ryan]

Run across a lake.

[Host]

Yeah, we're gonna take a page out of Stephen King's book with his new movie coming out soon. You can walk.

[Tyler]

Nerdiest answer.

[Guest]

He had to work. The new movie coming into. Is this a promotion?

[Tyler]

Is this a promo?

[Guest]

Patreon's no ads.

[Host]

Paramount's paying approach. If you want to walk on water, you cannot go below 3 mph or you will be shot or you'll die.

[Ryan]

Okay, I can deal with that on the water.

[Host]

Yep. If he's doing this, he'll die if he goes below a certain speed.

[Guest]

Oh, so you. Well, yeah. You could troll, I guess you could. You could troll with, like, a bottom bouncer.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Guest]

If you're fishing, three miles an hour.

[Ryan]

Is a little fast, But I can't really ice fish, which is fine.

[Guest]

Or you can walk on that water even if you didn't have the super super power.

[Host]

That's true.

[Ryan]

Good point.

[Tyler]

You're always ice fishing, essentially.

[Guest]

Except he can't stop. And he can't stop.

[Tyler]

That sucks. That's just annoy. Totally null and voids. The coolness of being.

[Guest]

Yeah, well, it's.

[Host]

So does your pants.

[Tyler]

Not as bad, though.

[Guest]

Diaper.

[Host]

True.

[Tyler]

Yeah. It's like, think about your kid shits his pants. Like, you're pretty in and out of that. Cleaning it up.

[Guest]

Yeah, I would just. If I wanted to teleport anywhere, I would teleport to that time, but just to a bathroom specifically, so that I could just leave.

[Tyler]

Really? Really.

[Ryan]

That would work, though.

[Tyler]

I would also, if I were you, what I would do is I'd make the time capsule also a shower.

[Guest]

There we go. It's just stopping down.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Isn't it instant, though, if you time travel. Yeah.

[Tyler]

So they do that, but then when you get there, instead of getting out of the capsule, you just take a shower. Quick.

[Ryan]

Oh, there's a. Okay. There's a shower right by the capsule.

[Tyler]

There's a cat. The capsule is a shower.

[Host]

It comes with the water.

[Tyler]

You know, like back to the Future. The car is the thing. The shower is. Ryan just goes in his shower and he teleports. That way.

[Guest]

Yes.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Tyler]

I got you. I got you.

[Ryan]

I thought it, like, takes, like, five minutes to go somewhere and you're gonna be showering during it.

[Guest]

No. Nope.

[Tyler]

Yeah, you have to. You have to figure out. You have to be. Waffle Stop.

[Ryan]

The Waffle Stopper 9000.

[Tyler]

Dr. Diaper Waffle Stop. Yeah, that's his. That's his superpower move. Waffle Stomp.

[Guest]

But if it's diarrhea. I don't even need to waffle stomp it.

[Tyler]

That's true.

[Ryan]

Good point.

[Tyler]

You can go.

[Guest]

So, I mean, I got answers.

[Host]

That's just a quick rinse.

[Guest]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Guest]

A clean break. I don't even need tp.

[Ryan]

It's like a bidet.

[Host]

Yes, that is true. Actually.

[Tyler]

Just the cleanest superhero, but he's clean because he's also the dirtiest superhero.

[Host]

Yeah. Yep.

[Guest]

Yeah. Walgreens number one customer. Just buying up the lotion.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Guest]

My skin is so chapped.

[Host]

I'll do invisibility so I can Irish goodbye. Easier to plan it as much.

[Tyler]

You can be invisible, Tyler. Okay, but every time you're not invisible, you just have a raging boner.

[Host]

That's pretty funny.

[Guest]

Duct tape.

[Host]

Yeah. I mean, I could just wear compression shorts every day. Jeans, jeans, jeans. And compressions is my diaper.

[Guest]

The baggy jeans are in right now, but when the skinny jeans come back, you're.

[Host]

Yeah, but I'm at the age now where I don't have to be.

[Tyler]

Just imagine if he's invisible, then goes uninvisible in a place he's not supposed to be, and he just be appears with a raging like a school. How alarming that would be for everyone. Yeah. Good luck taking your kids to school, Tyler.

[Ryan]

100Ft.

[Host]

I could have the compression shorts. I'd be fine.

[Guest]

Like high school wrestling practice.

[Host]

Why am I going to high school wrestling practices?

[Tyler]

Well, you. You got. You acquired this as a kid.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

As soon as you could pop a bee, you. You acquire the ability.

[Host]

Yeah. Okay.

[Ryan]

That's the origin.

[Guest]

Yeah, you can't go to.

[Tyler]

That's the origin story. Your first boner. You were so embarrassed that you wanted to become invisible.

[Guest]

Ah.

[Host]

I can live with this one.

[Tyler]

You're gonna have to.

[Guest]

But on the plus, you're going to be ready at all times.

[Host]

That's true.

[Tyler]

Could become a porn star.

[Host]

Could.

[Tyler]

Guys, if you want more, you bet your radio. You gotta check out our Patreon. You gotta go to patreon.com you bets radio or look us up on the app. And we have hundreds of hours of other episodes on there that you can't get unless you're signed up. So you gotta check us out on Patreon. You bet your radio, baby.