Bachelorettes, Budgets & Bottle Service

Summary

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"Bachelorettes, Budgets & Bottle Service"

You Had 2 Be There – July 16, 2026
Hosted by Erin Miller, Kate Steinberg, and Nicole Story Dent

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Episode Overview

This episode is a hilarious, unfiltered ode to the wild world of bachelorette parties, the spiraling costs of celebrating, and the nostalgia of 90s-2000s trends that shaped millennial memories. Erin, Kate, and Nicole spill their collective experiences—from county fair scams and overpriced garage sales to the transformation of bachelorette parties over time. The trio unpacks everything from “bottle service on a Plato’s Closet budget” to the politics of group trips, and the evolution from wild Vegas nights to wellness-themed retreats.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

County Fair Chaos and the Cost of Fun

• Kate's County Fair Blowout (00:24–04:37)
  • Kate recounts burning through $300 in tickets at a county fair with Chad, trying to win stuffed animals.
  • Chad wanted the giant monkey she donated; communication fail leads to “goodbye, $500 monkey.”
  • Reveals the psychological tactics of ticket-based payment: “The psychology of it, is you’re not paying with money, you’re paying with tickets…” — Nicole (02:42)
  • Carnival game workers admit the games are “easy if you’re rich”—and rigged to lose.

Thrifting Woes: Inflation Hits Garage Sales

• Kate's Garage Sale Disaster (05:33–07:28)
  • Finds a $70 Reformation dress at a garage sale; expects $17.
  • “Look me in the eye and be for real right now. We’re at a garage sale. Inflation has hit garage sales.” — Kate (06:23)
  • Discussion of vintage fashion trends reappearing, and people confusing Poshmark pricing with yard sales.

Bachelorette Parties: Then vs. Now

• Changing Traditions & Ages (07:36–09:08)
  • Nicole never had a bachelorette (courthouse marriage); muses on being a “40-year-old bachelorette.”
  • Erin and Kate discuss how parties shift from looking hot for attention to maximizing fun with the girls.
  • “The goal is not to—for the male gaze, it’s to have as good of a time with your girls. In fact, it’s probably to repulse the male gaze and keep them away.” — Nicole (10:30)

Iconic Locations & Activities

• Nostalgic Vegas Parties & Modern Variations (12:06–14:22)

  • Erin shares her 2018 Las Vegas bachelorette: pool parties, white jumpsuit, bottle service, custom visors, temp tattoos, “#MillerTime” hashtag.
  • Reflections on changing trends: from penis straws to thoughtful/themed gifts, and the prevalence of wedding hashtags.

• Location Trends (29:30–30:15)

  • Classic spots: Vegas, Nashville, Scottsdale, Charleston, Miami. Newer trends include Napa, San Diego, wellness retreats.

Budgets & The Price of Participation

• Runaway Costs & Gift Expectations (16:03–17:27)

  • Bachelorette costs now “nearing almost a grand,” sometimes up to $2,000 per person.
  • “If I’m spending over a grand, I’m gonna enjoy this. This is also my bachelorette party.” — Kate (23:32)
  • Pressure to buy new wardrobes for themed parties; costs overload bridesmaids and guests.

• Bottle Service Trauma (24:26–25:02)

  • Erin’s early bachelorette experience: goes negative in her bank account for Chicago bottle service in her Plato’s Closet days, for “one drink out of it.”

Group Dynamics: Friend Groups, Strangers, and Drama

• Merging Worlds (18:00–23:06)

  • Bachelorettes often bring together high school friends, college friends, in-laws, and wildcards.
  • “There’s always those girls who are like, ‘I’ve known her since I was five.’ It’s like a territory thing.” — Nicole (23:12)
  • Stories of cliques, drama, and who the bride feels most loyal to.

• Sister-in-Law Anxieties (20:08–21:53)

  • Kate’s fear of being the “weirdo sister-in-law” on unfamiliar trips.
  • Anecdote: mask drama during post-Covid party highlights friction between old/new friends.

Activities: Old-School to Over-the-Top

• Penis Paraphernalia & Themes (26:36–28:02)

  • Phases of penis straws, banners (“Last Dick Forever,” “Save the Last Pickle to Tickle”).
  • “Now it’s getting out of control… Welcome bags and all sorts of…” — Erin (15:46)
  • General consensus: the era of overtly sexual party favors is over; now it’s more about niche, funny themes.

• Moms & Aunts at Bachelorettes? Hard Pass. (28:02–29:30)

  • Strong feelings that mothers and aunts shouldn’t be at wild parties—unless they’re paying.
  • “We must release the mother. Unless she’s paying for the cabana—then she can stay.” — Kate (28:44)

• Strippers & Group Bonding (33:52–39:16)

  • Discomfort with male strippers, awkward encounters—including a stripper who turned out to be someone’s dad’s football player.
  • Unexpected: drag shows universally loved for fun, less sexual energy.

Organization: The Type A Planning Wars

• Itineraries and Dress Codes—To the Extreme (39:49–43:41)
  • A producer’s legendary all-caps anti-white dress code email for a 2024 trip: bans “white, cream, champagne, silver, pale blue,” offers to Amazon Prime t-shirts for offenders.
    • “If not wearing white for three days is an issue for anyone, let me know your size and I will…Amazon Prime you an alternative.” (41:38)
  • Seven-page PDFs and Excel spreadsheets are now bachelorette essentials.
  • Consensus: you need a “Venmo Mom” (Type B guest who just pays and shows up) and a “Class Mom” (Type A mastermind) for group event harmony.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

On Carnival Scams:

• “That’s the psychology of it, is you’re not paying with money. You’re paying with tickets…that’s how they get you.” — Nicole (02:42)

On Outrageous Thrift Prices:

• “Inflation has hit garage sales.” — Kate (06:23)

On Bachelorette Party Transformation:

• “The goal is not to…for the male gaze, it’s to have as good of a time with your girls. In fact, it’s probably to repulse the male gaze.” — Nicole (10:30)

On Group Dynamics:

• “There’s always those girls who are like, ‘We know her better. I’ve known her since I was five.’” — Nicole (23:08)

On Budget Stress:

• “I went negative in my bank account to get out money for bottle service. I got one drink.” — Erin (24:55)
• “If I’m spending over a grand, I’m gonna enjoy this. This is also my bachelorette party.” — Kate (23:32)

Iconic Millennial Insults:

• “We need to bring back millennial insults…the world’s cruel enough. Booyah, bite me, talk to the hand, as if… The internet would be a lot nicer.” — Nicole (55:11)

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Listener Submitted Wild Bachelorette Stories

(44:52–54:33)

• Peeing in an alley together after only hours of meeting: “Bonded for life because of the trauma.”
• “A friend of the bride, who is married, met a cop while out…and they showered together. She’s still married.”
• Bride allegedly hooking up at her own bachelorette, everyone watching at her wedding.
• Classic drama: “My mom and I got in a fight…ruined the trip. Moms stay home.”
• Injuries: Broken feet/legs from sliding across cars, falling on Broadway, “George Washington” hair at dry bar, destroying engagement rings on piñata night.
• Theme: Hijinks blend embarrassment, group bonding, and lifelong “inside jokes.”

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Timestamps for Notable Segments

• Fair and Ticket Psychology: 00:24–04:37
• Garage Sale Sticker Shock: 05:33–07:28
• Early Bachelorette Experiences & Hashtag Games: 12:06–16:22
• Bachelorette Budgets & Group Gift Anxiety: 16:03–17:27
• Bachelorette Party Drama and Cliques: 18:00–23:06
• Strippers, Stories & Drag Shows: 33:52–39:16
• Type A Planning & Dress Code Email: 39:49–43:41
• Listener Bachelorette Stories: 44:52–54:33
• Closing: Bring Back Millennial Insults: 54:44–56:44

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The Tone & Takeaway

Zany, self-deprecating, and warmly nostalgic, the trio revels in the camaraderie and chaos unique to millennial girlhood, calling out the evolution of bachelorette culture—from earnest attempts at glamour to full-scale, themed, and (sometimes absurdly) expensive escapades. The takeaway: It’s not about the money, the matching t-shirts, or the theme—it’s the stories you’ll have (and sometimes the ones you’d rather forget, but can’t stop telling).

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If you ever wanted the unfiltered, hilarious truth about what really goes down before the wedding bells, this is the definitive millennial bachelorette tell-all. Sucks to suck, y’all—until next week!

Transcript

[A]

You had to be there, baby. You had to be there, baby. You had to be there, baby. You had to be there, baby. You had to be there, baby. You had to be there, baby. You had to be there, baby.

[B]

Well, welcome to you had to be There.

[A]

I'm Kieran.

[C]

One, two, three at the same time, everyone.

[A]

I'm Kate.

[B]

Anyway, Kate, tell your story. I just. Just want to hear it. Okay.

[A]

Welcome to you had to be There. I have something to gripe about. So I went to a county fair, Ellie's county fair, and I did not realize how quickly you blow through those tickets. I. Oh, I'm not.

[C]

Scam.

[B]

It's the biggest scam. I can talk about this.

[A]

Within 10 minutes between Chad and I, I spent about $300 trying to win a monkey. And this is two grown adults. Nicole, I don't know how you do it with children, because we got addicted to the games. Like, we were trying to knock over all the cans. Just one more.

[C]

One more try. Now. Now I get it. I'm good. Now let me one more time.

[A]

I'm running back to the ticket booth, and I come back with, like, 16 more tickets. It's gone again. And Chad's like, no. And between that, the food, the. The roller coasters itself were different tickets. Like, I spent so much. So much money at this fair, and I just. Again, where I'm going with this is. I don't know how people do it with kids, because.

[C]

Did you end up winning anything?

[A]

Okay, so we end up winning four stuffed animals. We won a giant monkey. Okay, A giant monkey, a dog, and two little guys. At the end, I donated. There was, like, a Cool. I actually like this. There was a donation bin, and I tossed the two little ones in the donation bin, and I told Chad. I'm like, we don't need two big guys. Like, I'm like, I'm gonna give it to, like, a little kid. Give. And then he's like, yeah, go give it to a little kid. I missed the part where he said, like, hold on to the giant monkey. He wants it. And I ended up going up to, like, two little kids. And I was like, oh, do you guys want these? We can't take them home. The little kid grabs the big dog, the other kid grabs the monkey, and I turn around. Bye, guys. And Chad's like, wait, Kate, I. I told you I wanted the monkey. I.

[B]

The.

[A]

And then I felt bad. I'm like, why did you. There. Where did we cross, like, wires that we. I. I totally missed that. You wanted the monkey, and you can't

[C]

go back and be like, sorry, kid, never mind.

[A]

No, and I kept thinking. I kept.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

There was a part of me. It's like, should I go back and be like, hey, I'm so sorry about this.

[B]

Can you imagine?

[A]

No, but I just kept thinking, oh, goodbye, $500 monkey. Like, that was.

[C]

You can't do that math, though. That's. That was. You can't. You have to lit, like, let it. Let it be. It's. It's gone. And that's how they get you is. It's like one. Like, $5 equals one ticket. They do. They do a whole, like, exchange system where you forget. That's the psychology of it, is you're. You're not paying with money. You're paying with tickets. Like, oh, oh, my gosh. There's only one ticket to play this game. Well, yeah, but one ticket equals $5. Yeah, I watched there. No, that's. There's a documentary about that. Or it's like one episode in a series about how each. He goes through each game and shows how you're rigged to lose and how.

[A]

No, I was just gonna say that.

[B]

Thank you. I'm like, how'd you get four stuffed animals? Those games are rigged.

[A]

Okay, Lose.

[B]

How many games did you play?

[A]

I'm 500. That's why. No, that is why it was so much money, because this is where I knew it was going wrong was when I walked up to the, like, ring toss one. I kept asking. Every time I walked up, I was, is this game hard? And I'm like, do a lot of people.

[B]

The guy's like, you're never gonna win.

[A]

He said. He said, it's easy if you're rich. The first words that come out of his mouth. And I was like. I was like, oh, shit, we're in for a long day, and I don't have the funds to be like, I can't. This is not where I need to be. The hill. I need to die at the fair. But Chad was throwing with all his might.

[B]

We.

[A]

We bet it all on the milk can game. And the milk, like, the cans are meant to never over. The last throw on the. Chad threw it so hard down. The entire way home, he. His arm was tingling his way.

[B]

He was like.

[A]

I was like, chad, are you okay? And he's like, no, I. He's like, it's fine. It's fine. I just can't. Like, my fingers don't really have much, like, feeling in them. I'm like, do you want to. Should we go to the like, emergency. Like. But I need to say, I will show you guys the video. Maybe we should put it up, because I have it.

[C]

Yeah, he threw.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

We're gonna need to see that footage. But, yeah.

[C]

And I think there's something about, like. And maybe like, whenever you're with a D, I don't know if it's from movies of something about. It's like your manhood's being tested in those moments.

[B]

There's a lot of fair scenes in movies from the 2000s. Right. TV shows, they were always down.

[C]

I was really let down that that wasn't how it actually went down.

[A]

It was also, like, in every music video, I think. Like, JoJo's music videos, they're all just a fair. Like a man fair, dude.

[C]

Maybe the fairs just, like, didn't require filming permits, and it was just, like, a cheap place to get. Get in and out and get the job done.

[A]

I mean, they were even at the

[B]

fair in the Notebook. Like.

[A]

Yeah, so true.

[B]

But if.

[A]

Chad, you're right, though. Like, I think Chad, our relationship was, like, on the line. Like, if he didn't win me a stuffed animal, like, he was never going to see you again.

[C]

And then you gave it away. After all that hard work, you gave it away.

[A]

I have a photo.

[B]

Chad, like, tore his shoulder and you just.

[A]

Also, speaking of everything's expensive. I went to a garage sale and a Reformation dress from 2021. We all know the style. I will send a. I think I actually have a photo, too.

[B]

I want to know what style you're talking about, if I would recognize it. I bet.

[A]

So it was like this bright yellow floral dress. And I have been.

[B]

Is it, like, silky?

[A]

Silky, yes, it's a silky reformation dress. It's kind of like a tube top style with two straps. Everybody has this dress in every single color. And I thought, you know what? Like, I've been really kind of getting into, like, thrifting lately and, like, the environment. And I'm like, you know what?

[C]

Let's.

[A]

Yeah, let's do. Let's do this garage sale. And I literally almost flew down the entire driveway when she said the dress was $70. No, I said. I thought she said 17 at first. And I was like, oh, hell yeah. Like, yeah, cash. Like, I got you. No $70. And I'm like, look me in the eye and be for real. Right now. We're at a garage sale. Inflation has hit garage sales.

[C]

Well, what would that have been? Full price back in the day?

[A]

273.

[C]

Okay. I think maybe just to be like, to try to reason through this. I think it could be that a. That stuff's coming back and she's probably seeing people who are selling their like y2k stuff on poshmark for like.

[B]

She needs to go on Poshmark.

[C]

Yeah, I think she's confusing yard sales and garage sales for Poshmark. And even in vintage stores, like, like seven dollar Charlotte ruse tops are going for like triple that. No, I think that was her mindset.

[B]

If I'm at a garage sale, nothing's over a dollar. Okay. Like things are 25 cents. Like what are we doing? I'm throwing change at you. Like.

[A]

No, you're right though. She. She thought it was a boutique. She thought?

[B]

Yes. Like she's selling at the wrong. She needs to go on Depop. That's where she needs to go. Okay.

[A]

She does. Yeah.

[C]

Did you buy it?

[A]

No, absolutely not. I'm gonna go on Depot. I mean I could get it cheaper somewhere else.

[B]

Whatever.

[A]

Anyways, let's. Okay. What are we talking about today?

[C]

My God, is she wearing the new couture?

[A]

Speaking of garage sales and maybe shirts from a bachelorette party that might end up in the garage sale.

[C]

What a transition.

[B]

What a transition. Bachelorette parties.

[A]

Bachelorettes. Wow.

[B]

Okay. Well, Kate, so you haven't had a bachelorette party. Okay.

[A]

Is this how you want to start this? No.

[C]

I was wondering, are you going to have one?

[B]

No, I was going down the line like. Nicole, did you have one?

[C]

No, because I was. I got married six months pregnant at the courthouse.

[B]

I was wondering. I feel. Yeah, I felt like you didn't have one.

[C]

Nope, never had one.

[A]

Do you want to have one? Like, would you want.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Do you feel like you missed out?

[C]

I think though it would just be like. I try to think how could my brain would get in the right mindset. Maybe if we would almost need to have like a vow renewal ceremony, it would need to be a pre party with the girls to a wedding ish themed thing which we've talked about doing. We've talked about having like a big party that's more just reception. Like maybe it's like a few short words, not a ceremony by any means. And it just being like a party. So maybe there could be a bachelor. But also it would be weird I think being a 40 year old bachelorette. And I know that exists, but typically I would say the age Average is late 20s, early.

[A]

Are you dying?

[C]

Because that's gonna be me.

[B]

Well, but, but you could do it differently. You know, grown up version. Bachelorette party.

[C]

Yeah. What would that look like or.

[A]

Well, okay. No, no.

[B]

Nicole or Kate? I'm curious.

[A]

Sorry. I just want to.

[B]

Let's say you were planning yours. Do you have any thoughts about it? Like, do you know what you want to do?

[A]

So here's the problem. I'm an elder millennial, you know, heading into the 40s in five years, and I want an American Girl Doll theme. And then I love that things get rocky. Why? It's like.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

Okay, okay.

[C]

No, I feel like I'm seeing that. It's. They're dressing up like pioneers. They're dressing up.

[B]

We dress like.

[C]

Like boys.

[B]

I think.

[A]

I'm.

[C]

I'm. That party.

[A]

It's not about being hot.

[B]

They were all dressed up as good

[C]

time George Washington or.

[B]

What were they dressed up as? Judges, remember? I mean, that's.

[A]

That's funny. See?

[B]

Just funny.

[A]

There was also one of a group of girls dress up as, like, eighth graders. And I thought that was the funniest. And did you see that? Did you see they had a school bus instead of taking, like a trolley around.

[B]

Stop. This is what I'm talking about.

[A]

They all had these degree bright neon Under Armour T shirts. They all have, like, their drawstring bags. It was really funny. That's interesting because I think maybe the

[C]

difference is if you're. If you're having a bachelorette party and you're like 25, and maybe half of the friend group is in a relationship, half are very single, then everybody's. The goal is to look hot as. Right? It's.

[B]

It's.

[C]

It's just. You want to look hot. But now most of us are, like. I would say most of the people you would invite would probably be in committed relationships if not already married. Right. So the goal is not to. To for the male gaze, it's to have as good of a time with your girl. In fact, it's probably to repulse the male gaze and keep them away for sure. So I'm all about it.

[A]

Wow. I didn't think about that. The switch from, like, the early 20s when we were in Vegas and we would be leeching on to, like, we'd be in a cabana and then there'd be, like a group of guys next to us and the way we would merge together and get all the free drinks and bottles. But now I went to a recent bachelorette party. We're. We're in a. At a club and we have like a. What's it called? It's like a private section. And if a man. If his shirt Sleeve came over the line. We were calling security and saying, get this. Like, get him out of here.

[B]

I love. We were.

[A]

We were wild. We were calling security on every guy that would like a shoot. We were kind of being crazy over the line.

[C]

You're on a power trip.

[A]

A power trip. Exactly. Give a girl a roped off area. Truly so true. Yeah.

[C]

Her own personal security guard. It's done. Also, I feel like too, it would shift the location you would choose to have it at. Like they get like taking like a big group like that going. I don't know. There's something that doesn't sound appealing like Vegas, but like an older location.

[A]

What do you mean like an older location?

[B]

Like, like, like what's a good one? Focuses.

[C]

Yeah. Like where you could play pickleball as a group.

[A]

Oh, Napa.

[C]

Like Napa.

[B]

You could do. Napa would be great.

[C]

Do some wineries.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Do a win. Just go read by the pool peacefully somewhere.

[A]

Did you have bachelor party?

[C]

Of course.

[B]

It was explained. Vegas. 2827. No, 27. No. 2827.

[A]

Okay. And where were you staying?

[B]

What?

[A]

Pool parties. You go to many girls? Chalkondales. Yeah. We need to know.

[B]

Tell us. Yeah, so it was 2018. It was like 11 girls, including me. A few people couldn't go. Like, I remember my sister made honor. Couldn't go because she was pregnant.

[C]

Whatever. And how dare you?

[A]

How dare she be pregnant during your time.

[B]

I can't believe my sister wasn't at my bachelorette party. But bad timing. Anyway. It was nothing crazy. Like, stayed at the Cosmopolitan. All stayed in like one room. We got one of the. They have these like kind of like Airbnbs in the back that you can sleep. A lot of people did pool parties. Calvin or no, David Guetta was at one of the pool parties and then just went to clubs at night, went and saw Calvin Harris. There was another big dj, another night, I can't remember. Got like bottle service. My friend surprised me with like a limo one of the nights. So we just like drove around, you know, with a stripper pole and all that. We're just like driving, screaming out the windows, like all around. It's just your typical, you know, bachelor party.

[A]

But that also was like peak Vegas time, 2018. Vegas.

[C]

Yeah. Everybody I know, like EDM and club music.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Public, like.

[B]

Huh.

[C]

What did you wear?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What are we doing?

[B]

I know one. One night I just wore like a white jumpsuit, you know?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

No, I feel like jumpsuits were like really big. Just like a full pant I'm different.

[C]

I'm not wearing a dress. I'm wearing a white pant.

[B]

Hey, I wear a white. It's a pan pantsuit, you guys. And I just had, like, one theme tonight where it was like, I wore white. Everyone wore black. And then I wore, like, white swimming suits, which is scary. And I got everyone, like, visors that said I don't even know what the clear visors, which is like, I would not. And we were all wearing them backwards. And then we all had tattoos that I got everyone matching tattoos. It said hashtag Miller time, which was our wedding. Hashtag.

[C]

I was like, was this late enough in the social media game that you like. Because you couldn't have a wedding or a party without a hashtag. Okay, so you. What was your hashtag?

[B]

We had Miller time.

[A]

That's so good. Wait, Nicole, what's yours? Wait, it's dent, right?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, it should be like, I don't

[C]

even know how you work.

[A]

Let's make a dent.

[B]

I know what was.

[C]

Yeah, that's the one that's great. Or sometimes it's, like, more your maiden name, and it's like saying goodbye to your maiden name. There was also. That one is like, you know, somebody's laughter raw. Yeah, there we go.

[B]

You could have done something good debt to be. Okay.

[C]

Kayla's helping us out.

[B]

Is that still a thing? Like, the hashtag? Because that was such a thing, figuring out your hashtag.

[A]

I. I'm sitting on pure gold right now. My future name is Savage. Like, and I here am.

[B]

It's a good one.

[A]

What am I doing? Like, my bachelorette party needs to be tomorrow. Like, I. Are we. While hashtags are still like, yeah, you can still do it, girl.

[C]

You should have done this in 2020 when Savage was. Yeah, you missed. You were.

[A]

I missed out all mine, Aaron. So you said that you got your bridesmaids visors and, like, tattoos and such, which now in 2026 is like. Like. Like scraps chump compared to, like, girls hitting each other.

[C]

Like, you have to do more than that now.

[A]

I mean, now girls are getting each

[B]

other now it's getting out of control. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's. There's, like, probably. Welcome, welcome. Bags and all sorts of.

[C]

Hey, you were responsible because also, isn't the maid of honor. Like, it's not even that the bride's supposed to technically not be involved in planning it, right?

[B]

Her girls. Yes. And I was not. I was not.

[A]

This is also something, like, nobody wants to talk about is, like, pricing bachelorette parties. Are Just getting pricier and pricier. Like, I remember back in, like, you know, 2017 era, you know, I'd be maybe spending like $500. And I was like, oh, this is a lot. Like, okay, but I'm going to do. It's my best friend. But now, am I crazy that they're nearing almost like a grand? I've had a couple over the past year. Couple years. And now they're like, casually like, oh, we spent like a 1000, 2000 on the bride. Like, because it used to be that

[C]

the wedding was expensive, that being a bridesmaid was expensive because of the wedding dress and, like, the wedding. But I feel like the bachelorette is the more expensive part between.

[A]

Between, like, the T shirts, the themes. Like, sometimes, you know, you're getting a boat, the boats get expensive. The location. Also map the Airbnb, the food, the Ubers, it's the plane. And then, I mean, I could be normal and just wear the clothes that I have in my closet, but then I get excited and then.

[B]

You need a whole new wardrobe.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And yeah, some of it we do to ourselves, but exactly, like, mandatory. Like, some don't. Some bra. It's like. Like Aaron was saying, it's like, you gotta wear black on this night. This night's themed this, this night's themed that. So you may not have in your closet the specific theme you need for each day of the trip.

[A]

Aaron, when you had your bachelorette party, did girls, like, gift you things? Did you have, like, a moment throughout, like, in the bachelorette party where you sit down, all the girls would give you, like, a lacy thong or, like.

[B]

Yes, so you can tell that wasn't lacy.

[C]

How was that to open that in front of your friends?

[B]

We did. Oh, fine. I mean, the friend. My friend group. Like, everyone knew each other. It was just like my high school and college friends, and everyone had met, so there was no, you know, like, awkwardness and waits. Yeah.

[A]

Speaking of that, though, the whole just,

[B]

like, bringing people blending groups together. Because I've definitely been on bachelorette parties where you don't know people or it's two groups or three groups that, like, have never met. And it's clicky and, you know, so that can get tricky.

[A]

Yes. Like, that happened.

[C]

I've really, truly only been on one, and that definitely happened.

[B]

What year?

[C]

This was recent. This was maybe 2000. I know it was recent because we ubered some weed. This was in California. Okay, that's a story in and of itself. I miss. I miss dosed myself, but it was 2000. It was post covet. I think it. No, maybe 2021. I'm gonna say 2021. 2022. But she had her group of friends. I knew her through work, and there was a really close group of like, five of us from working together for like, a decade. So we had that friend group and then her city friend group from where she lived and, like, people she had met through her husband, and they had, like, their couple friend girls. And I feel like it integrated fine at first, but, like, by the end of it, like, we wanted to do one thing, they wanted to do another thing, but we were trying to have her. Like, we didn't want her to ever feel like she had to choose between, like, what they wanted to do and what we wanted to do. Like, I remember we went to. We wanted a karaoke, because I'd never done. They have those cool karaoke places where everybody gets, like, their own room.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And we could not have been more excited and they could not have been less excited.

[B]

Oh, no.

[C]

But it was a lot of managing the emotions of that because we didn't ever want her to feel that. Right. Yeah. I don't know how good of it.

[B]

Well, you just gotta do what the bride wants to do. You gotta suck it up and if that's what she wants to do.

[C]

100.

[A]

You know, I was on a Bachelor,

[C]

but also, it's our job to plan.

[B]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

I was on a bathtub party where it was like. It was like the high schoolers. I was part of the college group. And then you have, like, the two cousins and the random family members. The one distant cousin, like, come on, like.

[C]

Or like the husband. Sister. The sister in the future sister in law who's having to watch you open lingerie.

[B]

Yeah, that was the one, you know,

[C]

fun time with the brother.

[A]

That was. I was just a sister in law on a bachelorette party. And I was really nervous going into it because I did not know anybody. And, like, I felt like I had a target on my back. Because every bachelorette party I go to, it seems like there is, like, the weirdo sister in law. And, like, I can see the tension when we go to the dinner. Nobody wants to, you know, sit near the sister in law, but she puts that herself because she's saying some weird things. She's acting a little kooky. And just.

[C]

So you were like, pretty much on your. So you. What's interesting about that is you only know the bride.

[A]

Yes. Wow. And I luckily, luckily, everybody was so cool. Everybody was so welcoming. Some girls didn't even also know each other. Like, they come from different, like, areas. Everybody was awesome. But the one bachelor bachelorette party where it was like, high school, college, two cousins, nobody was getting along. And this was right after Covid, too. So we're still, like, masked up. We go to Wisconsin. Because you could get away with, like, a bachelorette party in Wisconsin right after Covid. And I'll never forget, we went to a bar, and we're all dancing at night, and I was the only one wearing a mask. Sorry. Like, I. Sorry. You know what? And I remember this girl, she was one of the high school friends, comes up to me and pulls down my mask at the club, and I was like, oh, wait, that's crazy. And I remember being so upset.

[C]

And what'd you do?

[A]

I think. I think the bride slapper. Get involved for a second. I didn't want to get the bride involved, but I was like, wait, who

[B]

was the bride to you again?

[A]

She was like, my best friend, college roommate.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[A]

So this was her high school friend.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah. And I was just like, kick her out. Like, she has to go.

[B]

Like, was she drunk or.

[C]

That's just.

[A]

She was very drunk. And I think some people told her the next morning, like, what she did, because I wanted nothing to do with her at that point also, it was just, like, such a sensitive time, too. I was already on edge, like, going out. I was.

[C]

Did she apologize?

[A]

She did. And, like, I still want nothing to do with her. You do that once to me.

[C]

But what's interesting, I feel like, because typically, you're in your 20s, and so you still have those straggler high school friends that you've stayed in touch with, but you probably. I would say most people are pretty different post. Like, I feel like you're closer in terms of values, like, commonalities with your college friends. And the high school friends are a little bit more of a. Like, who knows what they're like, where they come from, where they. Who they've become now, what they're into. Like, the only thing that sometimes kind of still ties you together is that you went to high school, if you know what I mean.

[A]

I'm dying at the. Where they came from, because they really do got baggage. They really got.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, I don't know why.

[B]

What.

[A]

At least I think of high school friends.

[C]

Like, yeah, they were jealous that you were the new. You guys were the new friends. I was gonna ask, like, what you want to be? Didn't get along. What do you mean they didn't get along?

[A]

Long.

[B]

There's always those girls who are like,

[C]

we know her better.

[A]

Like, yeah, I've known her since I was five.

[C]

You know, it's like a territory thing. Who's the closest to the bride?

[B]

Totally.

[A]

Exactly. Oh, my God, please. I've been on those bachelorette parties where it's like, the one person that needs to, like, console the bride because they know them the longest. I'm like, yeah, all right. I'm just gonna go eat my Cheez Its and my take my Aperol spritz, like, at the top of the boat. Like, I forget it. Like, I'm done. I'm done. I've paid so much to be here. Don't ruin my time, okay? This is also my bachelorette party, too. If I'm spending over a grand, I'm gonna enjoy this.

[C]

God, I could imagine. Imagine. They're constantly bringing up, like, memories, like, hey, Rebecca, remember that one time we did this? We did that. We did. Oh, sorry. That was the inside joke. You guys wouldn't get it. Like, it's just a battle of.

[B]

Speaking of, like, money and bachelorette parties, I was thinking back to the very first bachelorette party I went on in 2012. It was like, the first friend to get married post, like, right out of college. So 2012. And I'm have no money. Zero money. I'm working at Plato's Closet at that time. Okay. Those are my Plato's Closet days. I was living in Iowa City. Okay. And in low income apartment. Okay. No money. And it's like, oh, my God. Like, she had it in Chicago and she got a yacht one day. So we split.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So we had to split that. And I remember, and I'm thinking, how am I going to afford this? And I remember one night we got bottle service and her sister was the maid of honor, and she was like, telling us all how much we owed for bottle service. And I, like, had to go to the atm and I was like, I can't afford bottles. I literally couldn't afford it. I went, like, negative in my bank account to, like, get out money for bottle service. And I got one drink out of it. It, like, got us one big bottle of Grey Goose. And I got one drink. And I just remember thinking, like, I can't.

[A]

This is crazy.

[C]

The overstrapped fees you probably had to pay on that. And you couldn't, like, pay somebody back with a credit card. Stressed.

[A]

No, I was stressed. My God, this is so. I was in New Orleans and it was just, like, for a wedding. But I was doing, like, dueling pianos. And I, again, I get just like caught up in the moment. I'm running to the ATM every 10 minutes to put like $20 down on every Taylor Swift song. I was like, I need, I need to pay like 40 for the all too well, 10 minute version. But anyways, I was hit with so many overdraft fees, I was moving money. I was going to my savings. I'm calling my financial advisor.

[C]

Hey, this is you at the fair. This is you at the fair, girl.

[A]

There's an addiction. There's a. Here I am, I'm like, oh, like eight dollar tip for ubereats. Like this. Oh, this is going over. I can't like. And now here I am spending like so much money everywhere else. My first bachelorette party was.

[B]

Yeah, let's hear it.

[A]

Do you guys remember, like the stripper studios? Like, sorry, sorry, sorry. Let me pull where, like, you would learn.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. Why. Why would I call it a stripper studio? Am I okay? A pole dancing class. Yes. Okay, okay. And we did it too. It was for my cousin's bachelorette. And I was like, still at DePaul at the time. I was like a senior. I was way too young to be there, but I remember we learned to pole dance to Beyonce's ego. Like, got a big ego. And here. And now that I know they're not talking about the ego, like, in my head at the time, I'm like, I literally was like, he has a big ego. And like, they're talking about like, his penis. Like, that's crazy. That's crazy.

[C]

Okay, speaking.

[B]

That should roll into the penises.

[C]

Yeah, my. The one I just went on a couple years ago, she was like, I swear to God, if you, if anybody brings a penis, like, you're going home.

[B]

It was like you on the next

[C]

flight and you're going home. I feel like there was a. There's an era where it was, it was, it was novel millennials. And then it became this thing that brides were like, don't you dare.

[B]

Penis straws.

[C]

Uh huh. Like, don't make me put my. My mouth on a tiny penis.

[B]

Blow up dolls.

[C]

Sip of chardonnay. Yes. Blow up dolls.

[B]

Like, there was one party, I went, yeah, In Kansas City where I brought a blow up doll and I brought that blow up doll around with us everywhere. It didn't leave my arms out to dinner. It was on my shoulders. There's videos of it. I brought it everywhere on the, like, pub, whatever the hell those did.

[A]

You name it?

[C]

You might have named him, right?

[B]

I bet we don't remember. I don't remember what his name.

[C]

It was usually like, Steve. Or like, like, wait, something exotic.

[A]

Steve, did you have, like, penises at your bachelorette party? Like, did you have the penis straws? Like, did you have, like. I don't like the penis. A thing.

[B]

No, no. It's, like, not necessary.

[A]

When there's a b. When there's a banner that says, like, last dick forever. Or like, like, and they're. Everyone's posing in front of it. I'm like, this is like the most. Like, I can't even. Or like, save the last pickle to tickle. Like, I don't even know. They're so they're getting creative now. No, I swear.

[C]

I like that.

[A]

This was just at my sister in law's. It was like, last pickle to tickle or something like that. I remember being like, wow, they're really, like, getting okay creative with this. Actually, we need to talk about something that I have. I'm very passionate about this topic. Mothers cannot go on bachelorette parties. Mothers and aunts stay home.

[C]

Have you been on one that a mom or an aunt was there?

[A]

Yes, I have. And we are in. Shoot this. Okay. Yeah.

[B]

I know you're like, they might listen.

[C]

Allegedly.

[A]

Allegedly.

[B]

But I agree they shouldn't be invited.

[A]

I just think that a mother might hold the younger group back.

[C]

Agreed.

[A]

When you're trying to get free stuff at an age where you cannot afford a cabana. Sorry, we must release the mother. Unless she's paying the aunt. Okay. So actually she can stay. So that is.

[C]

Now I'm remembering.

[A]

Now I'm wondering why she was there

[B]

if she's getting everybody bottle service and stuff.

[A]

Yeah, fine.

[B]

And. And is she cool? Like, it's. She cool. Is she cool? Is she down?

[A]

Like, that's fair. There's.

[B]

I don't know.

[C]

Is this the mom of the bride or are we talking mother in law?

[A]

No, mother.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Okay. Okay. No. See, mother in law. That would be. Unless. Okay. Unless. Like, it depends.

[B]

It depends. But I prefer no. I prefer no. Okay.

[A]

I prefer no, too. Okay. Also like, location. Wait, Aaron, yours was in Vegas. I feel like Vegas is classic, but, like, people are starting to get, like, really niche with locations. I feel like I've had a lot of, like, Charleston, I guess. Charleston's like a big one. I feel like Nashville's a big one.

[B]

Nashville, Vegas. Mine was Scottsdale.

[C]

San Diego.

[A]

Scottdale. Oh, San Diego.

[B]

I've never been to one in San Diego.

[C]

La Jolla. We stayed in La Jolla.

[A]

I love that. Actually, it was great.

[C]

She wanted a more chill. Like, we didn't go out any of the nights. Like, we did karaoke and we would go to dinner, but she didn't. She was not interested in, like, a wild night.

[A]

Oh, my God. I did do soul cycle during a bachelorette party in Miami.

[B]

Okay, that's gonna bring me into something here.

[A]

Yeah, go for it.

[B]

Go, go. Well, I was going to talk about bachelorette parties these days. I feel like you still partied a lot in the most recent one you went to, like. And I'm sure a lot of people are still out here. Like, the main goal is drinking, getting drunk, partying. But I do feel like there has been a turn with some bachelorette parties because last time I was in San Diego, I witnessed a bachelorette party when we were out to breakfast. It was like 8am they were in matching workout sets. The bride was in a white. They were all in, like, navy blue or something. Matching under eye patches, snatched, getting matcha or pressed juices. Whatever it was looked like they just gone to like a Pilates class or meditation something. And I feel like there. It's popular for it to kind of be like a health retreat type situation, you know, where we were just getting. We were still drunk at 8am I know. So I. I now, I do think people are still getting trash and all that, whatever, but I feel like there's a little bit of a turn.

[C]

There's more I would be going on. I would be so disappointed if I showed up ready to go. And they were like, so we're going

[B]

to go to Pilates, So we're going to meditate.

[C]

It's like, oh, I feel like here

[A]

in L. A. I'll see, like, girls on a hike on Runyon. A bunch of, like, there will always be like a clump of bachelorette girls on the. On the hike. But I feel like I can sense, like, all right, this is day one. Like, they're about to party hard tonight. But. But no, I definitely have seen an increase on TikTok of girl. It's looks like a wellness retreat. I feel like I've been on so many bachelorette parties. It has. There's been fun ones. There's been stressful ones. There's been ones with PDFs and Excel files and emails and stuff. And it. And I. And I know. I hear the discourse behind the scenes. A lot of girls are upset behind the scenes. And knowing and hearing how many people normally are upset, it makes me, like, not want to do one at all. It makes me like, not want to ask a dime out of anybody. It's just like, if I do do one, I'll pay for the whole thing. Just, just come with a costume and like, no, I'm not gonna do that. But like, but I just like, don't want people to be upset. I don't want to have people spending money because I've been on the receiving end, right? It's like they're asking for more money and I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Like this is becoming a lot. But. But once you're there, you enjoy it. But like I, I don't know, I just know the drama behind the scenes

[C]

and yeah, the lead up to it is like you sometimes it's like somebody you've never met, you've only corresponded with them over email and you hate them by the time you've ever actually even met them just because of the way they're. And you've got type A people meeting type. And honestly it's. There's a lot of similarities within motherhood. You have the like the type A moms, it's the class moms, it's the ones who are doing the planning party. I'm a Venmo mom. I'm a type B. And I was this way for bachelor lecture. So I was like, I will pay extra. I will pay my part and then some for me to just be able, like because what you don't want. And a lot of times I feel like the self aware type A's are like, that's great. I get to make the choices. I don't have to try to convince anybody. I'm like, you choose what we do

[B]

and where we go.

[C]

I will show up, I will be a good time and I will pay more than my part. I feel like if you find a good mix of those two things. But yeah, there are times, times where it's just like, oh, I haven't even met you and I think I don't like you because of how you are over email. But there has to be somebody like that. Like, there has to be somebody does because I like class projects.

[B]

I've been on an unorganized bachelorette party and that's not fun either. I remember it was in Chicago. I went to Chicago a lot. It was in Chicago. I only knew a couple people and it was a lot of her college friends I didn't know. And the only thing we had planned

[A]

was a male strip club. And it was like a low budget,

[B]

like Chippendales, I don't know. Anyway, it was A little scary. But that was all they had planned. Like, no dinner reservations, nothing. No idea. Like, so it was a shit show.

[A]

I have to ask. What do you guys think of, like, the strippers? I feel like. Like, what do you guys. Because I feel like they keep popping up at every bachelorette party I go to, and they make. I'm just so awkward going to that

[B]

male strip club in Chicago, down, like, that dark alley. I did not like that. No, I did not. I did not like that. They were a little aggressive. The strippers were. They came over because it was a bachelorette party, and they're, like, picking it. I. I did not like it.

[A]

I'm coming to your house to do, like, the strip.

[B]

I've never. I've never been at one where they come to my house and be a little scary.

[A]

I have a story.

[C]

I can do without that.

[B]

I can do without that.

[A]

Wait, the one in Wisconsin. We did have a stripper come over, and he brought his. He brought, like, an eye. This is also mindful. 20, 22, 21. He brought an ipod, disc port, like, or like, an ipod. He plugged his ipod in, and he started playing pony. But I remember, like, of course. Is there another song? No, but, like. Like, budget is tight. Like, he's doing this off an ipod. He's like. You hear, like, the little. Like, the little. As he's, like, scrolling through the songs. But this is where it got weird. So, you know, he's doing his routine, and the girl next to me was like, I think I know him. Like, I. Like, he looks. And we're all. It's my third cousin. And now she's. She's like, are you. Like, is your dad a coach? And she's like, really, like, heckling him. Like, he's trying to do his routine. He's trying to, like, grind up on the girls. And she just keeps interjecting, excuse me,

[C]

is your name Frank?

[A]

She's like that. Like, I know your dad. Like, you. He's the football.

[C]

That's an insight. That's not an appropriate time.

[A]

To the point. He, like, kind of, like, breaks down at the end. He's like, yes, I went to University of, like, Wisconsin Madison. I did play football. Now I'm doing this. And then he. And so then it was just kind of weird. Like, she definitely, like, broke this guy down to the point. Like, he's telling us his life story, like, at the end of the set. But then one thing that's common for male strippers is that they linger after I heard this, that they don't just leave. They either try to get a number from a girl, or they're in your kitchen. This guy makes his way. He's eating, like, homemade brownies. Really, like, not drunk enough for this. I'm like, can we get this guy out of the brownie pan? Like, that was supposed to be my dessert after that.

[C]

Somebody call Frank. An Uber.

[A]

Frank.

[B]

Frank.

[A]

Matt has to go home. Everybody has.

[C]

I've heard this, though. They did that. They just. They. They. It's. They don't leave, like, even though that their time is up. Like, okay, we're not paying you beyond. They're just like, well, I don't have anywhere else to be. And so they just want to have a good time and hang out. I have no desire to be in that environment.

[B]

Oh, thank you.

[C]

I've never been in one.

[B]

No, I don't.

[C]

But I have no talk about it.

[A]

I'm so.

[C]

No desire. And for, like. And then a sweaty.

[B]

Was he.

[C]

Whenever he came, did he. Was he dressed up as, like, a police officer or, like, this guy a Ghostbuster or something?

[A]

This guy. This guy was just in, like, jeans and a plaid shirt. But I did just go on one recently. On a tr. With an axe or what? No, he was. He was a worker. And his little vest rips off, and, you know, he's like. He's taking girl. I mean, he's really, like, grabbing, smooshing.

[B]

So they grab. They grab. Okay, a little crap.

[A]

But at the end, he. He was trying to get the number of, like, the bride's little sister, and she said no. And once that she rejected him. He stormed up to the front of the bus and said, get me off this bus. And he took his vest.

[B]

This was on a bus.

[C]

Wait, I'm.

[B]

This was on a bus.

[A]

We were on, like, a party bus.

[C]

Nowhere to go.

[A]

He had nowhere to go. There's no room.

[C]

Oh, this isn't Frank. This is a different.

[A]

Frank was in Wisconsin at an Airbnb. This recent one. The construction worker was on a party bus. Very recent, in Chicago. Oh, that's too.

[B]

That's tight quarters. I don't like.

[A]

But, like, I've never been the type of girl, like, so, you know, like, sometimes, like, when girls are dancing and, like, even a girl will, like, come up behind you and pretend to, like, twerk or whatever. I have just always been so awkward that I can't even, like, pretend. Like, like, I just am not that person. So, like, especially when a stripper comes by me, I. Everything tenses up, and I'm like, Get away. Like, I just. I'm not the target for a stripper, so I definitely don't want. Oh, but I did have a drag stripper, and that was, like. It was like a drag show. It was just the best time. Like a drag show.

[B]

Those are fun.

[C]

Because it's not meant to be. Again, like, it's not meant to be hot and sexual necessarily. It's meant to be a good freaking time. The pressure's off for there to be something inappropriate, like.

[A]

Like Aaron's saying.

[C]

Like, it's like. It's, like, grabby. Like, it's not. It's. It's not as personal. Then I feel like it's more throwing you up in the air.

[B]

It's like, don't touch me. And then, yeah, this is some of the girls.

[C]

Stage of a Chippendales dance.

[B]

Some of the girls will be, like, so into it. And you're like, calm down, Jessica.

[A]

Like, Jesus Christ.

[C]

Were they single or were they not single?

[B]

Some of them were. Some of them were. You're like. You're a little too into this. And I remember just being in the corner, like, don't come near me.

[C]

I don't want to. I don't want to see anything.

[A]

Yeah. That's another thing to be studied is sometimes, like. Yeah. The people who get really into it and they're with, like, definitely are. They're married with children. Like, And I'm like, oh, okay. Like, I just.

[C]

I. I told my husband because my husband's been on bachelor trips, and I. He's come back and he. My husband can't keep a secret, and he tells me everything, and I'm like, I need you. I have to. I have to continue to see these people that you're telling me these horrible stories about. I don't want. And if I can't go tell on this man's behavior, don't tell me, because I can't. I can't sit with that. I know the wife. I can't. I can't live with that inside.

[B]

I've got some bachelor's stories that I.

[C]

Anyway, yeah, I'd rather not.

[B]

Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait.

[C]

I want to share, and maybe this could lead into. Ever asked asl. So one of our producers here on. You had to be there.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

We're talking about this being our subject matter, and she sent us. She was a maid of honor, and she sent us an email that she sent out a week before the bachelorette trip. And I would just like to read one. I mean, this thing is, like, pages long. So I can't imagine this is just one of many emails I'm having to like my fingers have scrolled like five times to get to the bottom of this email. It goes over finances, it goes over flights, it goes over dates, it goes over times. But the thing that I would like to read you is the. It's got an itinerary. It's the dress code.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

First it goes over like, hey, you've got to bring one black bathing suit and a cover up two dressy casual dinner outfits. But specifically there is a note on the anything but white note about the dress code. Okay, so this is where I'm going to start reading it verbatim. When I say quote anything but white, I mean as a bridesmaid, your outfits should not be any variation of white. Not white, not silver, cream, champagne, off white, white, polka dots, stripes, pale blue or light gray that photographs white, nothing that can even remotely be perceived as bridal, etc. This request should not be a shock to anyone, nor throw off, nor throwing a. Nor in there, nor throw off packing plans. As it is tradition slash common knowledge at bridal events for the bride to be the only person in white. Yes, some modern brides have been more relaxed and non traditional about this, but this is not the case for our bride. She is traditional with from no white down to getting married in a church. She would like to have her moment of being the only one in white, which is an extremely reasonable request. It is truly not difficult to find another color to wear as I know nobody is wearing white all day, every day. If you have any questions, I'm not done. If you have any questions about it, if an outfit that you would like to pack is questionable, feel free to send me a picture and I will let you know. If not wearing white for three days is an issue for anyone, let me know your size and I will personally Amazon prime you an alternative option. Or pack some extra oversized T shirts if need be. That's like 1/20 of this email. I feel like some shit had to have gone down before that point.

[A]

Right? Can I ask the year? This is data.

[C]

Yes, Let me tell you the year that this.

[B]

Oh, that's a good question.

[C]

2024.

[B]

Yeah, last week. Last week.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Amazing.

[A]

Oh, wow. That feel, it's giving like the energy of like the letter from Jersey Shore, like this anonymous letter. Like it's like that passionate and powerful. Wow.

[C]

If I was that email, it goes on to say like the relationship of everybody coming to the bride. There's even links to their Instagram Handles everybody's Instagram so you could stalk people before you show up

[B]

type of thing

[C]

a week to write. The way this takes me back to being in corporate America, just reading this

[A]

email, I will say I did just have like a seven page PDF of like the itinerary of what to wear and stuff. But it definitely. I got the message loud and clear. Not no white.

[C]

Understood. Yeah. I will wear black. I will wear black. Just so there's no confusion.

[A]

I'm not gonna lie. I have been on two bachelorette parties now where girls have brought a pale color dress or have worn white or like a silver. And I'm like, it is very much an eye roll and like our producer said, it is common sense, common knowledge not to wear white. So just don't pack it. Just don't pack your palest dress.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Some people so easy do it. So you know, she does have a point. Like you have to reiterate it a hundred times because people still will pack white.

[B]

Sometimes you gotta be strict with these people.

[C]

The note though, about the oversized T shirt, like, you got in trouble with the dress code at school, so you've got to wear the, like the school extra, extra, extra. Like the shirt of shame is what it is.

[A]

It's funny.

[C]

You will if you don't. If you wear white, you will be wearing a shirt of shame. Is that how you want to be pictured in all of these bachelorette party. I mean, shirt of shame.

[A]

Yeah, I want to be a fly

[B]

on the wall to see what she's like at the bachelorette party.

[C]

Yeah. Then it's like this person you expect to have a stick up their ass is probably the most fun one there. Once that's.

[B]

I want to know one quick thing

[A]

since like we were talking about like a group of people just like trying. There's always that moment when you're trying to get the group photo with everybody and you have to ask a stranger on the street and just try.

[B]

She's a drunken batch, guys. She just said sorry.

[C]

Yeah. We confirmed she could finally let loose. She was so tightly wound for three months straight. And then it was finally time for her to release the tension. Whatever.

[A]

No one's asked. No one's asked me to be a maid of honor. But I just like as a type C person sometimes, like, there's. There's no chance I could plan anything. Like, just please don't ask me.

[C]

No. People know better than to ask that of me. My God, is she wearing the new Juicy Couture?

[A]

I have some fun stories.

[C]

Yeah, I feel like, these are gonna be really unhinged.

[A]

I asked people for their wildest, craziest, juiciest bachelorette stories. I said, this could be funny. Heartfelt embarrassing. So here we go. You guys be the judge. Okay, here we go. Squatting in an alley to pee, holding another girl while she did the same, facing each other, having met her at the party earlier that day, then naked in the pool alone. Why I brought this up was because, like, you do meet these people sometimes. You just meet people that day, and all of a sudden, because you're on this trip, like, they become, like, your closest friend that weekend, and you're just doing things, like you're sharing a bathroom. Suddenly, like, I was just in the bathroom with someone I just met. I'm like, yeah, come in and pee with me.

[C]

Or you go through an experience like that, and it's like. And you're bonded for life because of the. The trauma. I mean, who. I would hope. You can't name more than five people. People on your hand that you squatted in an alley with and held their hand while they've peed or held their hair while it threw up. Like, I feel like when you go through, like, a night like that together, you're bonded for life.

[A]

Bonded. Okay. Went on a bachelorette for a close friend. A bra. A friend of the bride who is married, met a cop working outside the bars we were going to and exchanged numbers that night after we all went to bed, she left the house without us knowing. Brought him back to the house while we were all sleeping, and they showered together. Mind you, she only knew the bride because her husband grew up with her. They have the same friend group. So the husband's best friend's wife and cousin were on the bachelor bachelorette trip, too. She's still married. They hooked up, but at first claim they only showered. Still a lot of connections. But what I got out of this was a married woman on a bachelorette party hooked up with a cop and

[C]

openly in front of, like, didn't even try to hide it to the other. Like, just assumed that nobody there was going to be a snitch.

[B]

That's crazy. To bring him back to the house.

[C]

Also with women you don't like, strangers that have nothing, that they don't owe you anything to. This kind of keep that secret for you.

[A]

Reminded me, I know a bride who did, allegedly seen by multiple sources, hook up with a guy on her bachelorette party. And it was. And she's still married, but everybody stopped talking to her because they're like, you Hooked up with somebody like this.

[B]

Everyone knew about it on the trip.

[A]

Yes. And, like, getting off, they're all, like, watching her go down the aisle. Like, like, yeah, I'll stop. I'll stop there.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

My mom and I got into a massive fight and kind of ruined my whole trip. Short. Sweet. But again, I proves my point. Mommy's mamas stay home.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

Mama stay home. Okay. Well, I broke my foot on Broadway in Nashville. Like, straight up thought it was it would be smart to run across Broadway when there was two seconds left on walking thing. And I ate it right in the middle of Broadway that everyone saw. And cars had to wait. I jumped up, put my dress down, and kept running, clearly intoxicated. Intoxicated.

[B]

That's.

[C]

My husband had a friend who tried to do, you know that thing they do in movies where, like, a guy slides across the hood? He tried to do that and broke his leg in Chicago.

[B]

Oh, his whole leg.

[C]

Whole ass leg from trying to do that. I thought there's a name for it whenever you slide across a hood like that.

[B]

But I tried doing that on spring break in South Padre one time. I don't know. I have a memory of trying to slide across a car, this random car, when we were walking down the street, and I screamed like, rack City, bitch. And, like, slid across this car. I was, like, in my swimsuit.

[C]

Anyway.

[A]

Oh, my God. Wait, what was this? Rock City.

[B]

It was on spring break in South Padre. I just have this memory of, like, getting on someone's random car when we were walking down the street. Anyway. Oh, my God.

[C]

I feel like that was an era. There was an era of that. Of something about getting on cars and sliding across cars. I don't. I don't.

[A]

I don't know. I do want to add to the story. This reminded me when I was at my sister in law's bachelorette party in Vegas in, like, 2018. Actually, we were staying at the Cosmo. We might have been there same time. Erin, what month? I think it was, like, May. I was so blacked out. Okay. I was so blacked out. You know, we had all day at Wet Republic, but we had that evening. We were gonna go to dry bar, get our hair done and then go out. So I passed out after the pool. My sister in law comes in. She's like, kate, all the girls are at Dry bar. Please, like, get up. We have to go. I. I threw on a dress. And, you know, in Vegas, like, you have to go on. You have to cross over the bridge. I was so drunk that I dragged her to the bottom where the cars are driving on the street, Frogger style. Sprinted across like, this girl ate shit. Busted. My knee now is gushing blood. I'm still sprinting. We go to Planet Hollywood. I'm running through Planet Hollywood with a bloody knee. I get to dry bar. My knee is now blood stripping all down my knee. And during the dry bar, I paid for two cocktails that you get with your hair appointment. They said, they said I could not drink. They were going to cut me off from cocktails cut off at a dry bar.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Yeah. They brought in like the mall security to like, wrap my knee up. I still have a photo of me. I have two photos. One of me getting my knee wrapped. And then secondly, they did my hair so horribly. Like, I have a photo of this too. I don't know if it was because I was drunk, moving around too much. To this day, my friends, the girls group, calls me George Washington because the rollers in my hair were all pushed forward, little round rolls. I looked so bad that they were like, kate, you cannot go out that night. Yeah, we're gonna need a photo. I'm surprised I did not get arrested because you cannot cross Vegas streets.

[C]

Like, yeah, that's what I've heard.

[A]

Quarantine. We couldn't go to a male strip club, so two of the girls dressed up as Matt and had a stack of ones and just went crazy and dance like mag and had water bottles and spritz everywhere. Again, fun. It's not for, like, girls, girls. At my bachelorette, we went to a bar in Boston where my sister in law to be was bitten by a young man because he was wasted. It was wild. Bitten. Yes. Also, my BFS lost her phone that night with tons of good pictures. So any of it. So if anyone has it, we just want the pictures back.

[C]

Thanks.

[B]

Let us, let us know. Bss.

[C]

We don't need money. We just want the pictures.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

What is this, preschool? Like, I know. Remember the story. One time I was at a bachelorette party and you guessed it, Chicago. And it was like 2017. It was like literally a week or two after I had just gotten engaged. And I remember pinatas were a big thing at a lot of the bachelorette parties I went to. Like, we would like, set them up in like the hotel room and it'd be full of like, shooters.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[B]

And we hung it up a little too close to the wall. Okay. And we're hit. I'm hitting it with the bat as hard as I humanly can, like. And I swung so hard and hit my hand against the wall and didn't. Didn't realize anything. I was like, ow, that hurt. And fast forward several hours later, I'm at the bar and I'm looking down at my hand, and I'm just staring at my ring that I had just gotten.

[C]

Oh, no.

[B]

And I'm like, think I'm hallucinating. I'm literally, I'm just in the corner. I remember just staring down at my ring and it was smashed. It was from a circle to an oval smash. And there was diamonds missing. And I remember just being like, oh,

[A]

I just got this ring.

[B]

I was freaking out.

[A]

Wait, were you dropping two at this time?

[B]

So, like, yeah, that's like, okay, what

[C]

am I looking at?

[A]

But I would be sobbing. Did you, like, party the rest of the night?

[B]

I was, I mean, my heart dropped. It, like, ruined the rest of the night. I was like, Adam's gonna be so pissed.

[A]

Like, I just ruined my.

[B]

And it's made of platinum, so that's super, like, bendable type of metal. We met, went back to the hotel room that night and tried to find,

[A]

like, some of the diamonds on the floor. We couldn't find them.

[B]

We had insurance, so it was like, fine. But, you know, it was insured. But I just remember, wow. And who put that pinata right next to the wall? Like, yeah, just a pinata and a

[C]

stick in a hotel room probably what could go.

[B]

I know. There was another bachelorette party I was at where we had a pinata in the hotel room, and one of the girls missed the pinata and hit me in the face. And this girl was like, on the rowing team in college, so she was really strong. And I'll never forget it. She just smacked me right in the face.

[A]

And I was like, oh, my God, the screams. I'm sure from everybody.

[B]

He needs to cut out with the pinatas.

[A]

I did just, I. I did just try to do splits on a bachelor. On this recent bachelorette party I was on in my, like, my Jessica Simpson heels gave out and literally I played back the video and like, everyone's screaming for their life as I fall. Like, I just like the, like, I. I started crying after. So this is the problem. I started crying after because this is the one where I was a sister in law and I felt like I embarrassed my sister in law. Like, I just thought, like, I was already feeling like, I don't know all these girls. I want to be like the fun older, 30 year old out I go for the splits. During unwritten and I fall and I'm just was like, oh, but that is fun.

[B]

That's fun.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You're the girl doing this. You're Kyle Richards in the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Every part. She's doing this.

[C]

Did you not. Was the reaction of the room not what you expected?

[A]

I think it was because I was so drunk. I'm already like an adult.

[C]

You're paranoid.

[A]

Like, I'm like, yeah.

[C]

Type anxiety.

[A]

So then, so then I go over to her and I'm starting to tear up, and she's like, stop.

[C]

Like, what?

[A]

What's going on? I'm like, I just feel like I embarrassed you. And she's like, kate, stop. Like, you're fine.

[B]

Time for your hear me out.

[C]

Okay, Couture, we're going to get the clock ready. This has nothing to do with the subject matter we're talking about. It's just something that I saw. I, I, I was playing mahjong with a friend and she did something and she. We, you know, we joke with each other. And I said, you know what sucks to suck. And it made me think, this is my Hear me out. We need to bring back millennial insults. The world's cruel enough. I feel like if we could bring back the way that we would say, like, make fun of each other, we wouldn't hurt our feelings as bad. And it's also just more whimsical. I'm trying more bring more whimsy into my life, and that includes insults. Sucks to suck. Talk to the hand. Whatever. As if. Bite me. That's weird. Like calling people nerds. Like, we need to be calling people dorks. I do. Still. I say cool story, bro to my kids all the time. No Sherlock. Booyah. We just it. I think the Internet would be a lot nicer if we spoke to each other that way.

[B]

Yeah, I agree.

[A]

I know we shouldn't Bite me.

[B]

Oh, I'm gonna bring back bite me.

[C]

Bring. Yeah. What would you bring back?

[B]

Freegozoid.

[A]

No Sherlock.

[B]

No Sherlock. That's again. That unlocks a memory. I used to say that to my sister all the time.

[C]

All the time.

[B]

Sherlock. You.

[C]

No Sherlock.

[A]

Yeah, that's a good one. Also talk to the hand. I know, I know we shouldn't agree, but I have to agree with you. We need to like. I also think nerds endearing. I don't know, like, if, like, I

[C]

call my kids all the time. I know. I think that means I'm smart. I equate being a nerd. Like, you're. You're smart. I think it's so cute.

[B]

I love it.

[C]

But I think too like a little bit of bullying. I I think a lot of us are the way that we are because we had the appropriate amount of bullying from other kids. Right? And I think that the way that kids are bullied now is a totally different breed than just telling, like somebody else being like, oh, poned, you got pwned or what a noob. I I, I want to bring that version of cool story, bro.

[A]

Yeah, you have to be like shut down and then punch the shoulder.

[C]

Like, like now people get doxed. Until next time. This is you had to be there. Follow like all the things, answer our questions, send us your stories. We'll keep him a mononymous. A monomous hippopotamus.

[B]

Log off, touch grass and we'll see you next week. Lila.

[A]

Bye, losers.

[C]

Bye.

[A]

Sucks to suck.

[B]

Thanks for listening to you had to Be There with Kate, Nicole and Aaron. You had to Be There is produced by Sick bird Productions, Deanna DaCosta, Kayla Foreman and Rachel Derbyshire. If this episode unlocked a core memory, subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and leave us a five star rating. See you next week for another trip down memory lane.