Maya Hawke

Summary

Podcast Summary: You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes

Guest: Maya Hawke
Date: May 20, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this lively and deeply personal episode, Pete Holmes welcomes actor and musician Maya Hawke for a conversation that oscillates between hilarious, profound, and vulnerable. They explore Maya’s background, her journey as a creative, the anxieties and ambitions of show business, family and relationships, personal growth through therapy, and their shared fascination with self-awareness. From psychedelic gratitude to sibling dynamics and the role of AI, they keep it weird, insightful, and always authentic.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Psychedelics, Pot Edibles, and Screensaver Views

Timestamps: 03:13–14:00

• Pete describes a trippy experience accidentally consuming a high-dose THC edible (75mg), leading to a profound, loving, almost psychedelic evening alone.
  • "[I was] looking at my hands...that's cliche...And I was going to the room, I was going, 'no notes to reality.' I was going, 'no notes.' I couldn't have meant it more. And I was love, Maya. I was loving myself." — Pete Holmes (08:25)
• Maya shares a "Delta 9" soda story and how weed experiences can spark gratitude—seeing hotel balcony views and feeling like her life is an awesome simulation.
  • “Whatever space alien is playing, the video game of my life is doing such a good job.” — Maya Hawke (13:13)
• They riff on how beautiful moments are now often compared to screensavers and how social media/photos grant us extreme experiences with no effort, raising existential questions about effort and reward.

2. Luck, Circumstance, and Creative “Making It”

Timestamps: 14:00–21:55

• Pete and Maya challenge the myth of “making it” being solely about hard work. They discuss how luck, context, and timing play pivotal roles.
  • “People tend to underplay not just luck, but, like, time and place, circumstance, and all that sort of stuff.” — Pete Holmes (14:03)
• They agree that real pride comes from the work put into relationships, not just career ambitions.
  • “The work that I put into sustaining my relationships...is like one of the only things I feel proud of in my life.” — Maya Hawke (16:30)

3. Ambition, Fame, and the Fulfillment Trap

Timestamps: 17:37–29:54

• Maya unpacks her own ambition and the never-ending feeling of being “not enough,” even after tangible career successes (Stranger Things, music).
  • “I wake up all the time and I'm like, oh, my God, it's over. I didn't...make it before I was 22, and now you'll never make it. — Maya Hawke (17:24)
  • “The only time I would ever feel like I'd really made it is if I'd ruined my life.” — Maya Hawke (20:11)
• They talk about the cycle of celebrity—rising, falling, reinvention—and how having a true “craft” is a foundation more stable than online fame.
  • “If you are rooted in a core of craft, you can weather the storm of being made a statue of and had a statue toppled.” — Maya Hawke (21:44)

4. Relationship Dynamics, Therapy, and “Parts Work”

Timestamps: 39:58–56:39

• Maya and Pete delve into their personal and family histories, schooling, and therapeutic journeys. Both discuss using “parts work” or Internal Family Systems (IFS) techniques—giving names and personalities to emotional parts (the orphan, king, princess, etc.) to foster kindness and balance.
  • “I like to say like a king...I'm not saying we're not going to be hurt in the future...the lights are still on. Like, we're...okay.” — Pete Holmes (56:04)
  • “My princess is definitely not my best self.” — Maya Hawke (55:49)

5. Growing Up Hawke: Education, Dyslexia, and Finding a Lane

Timestamps: 25:04–33:36

• Maya recounts educational struggles due to dyslexia—memorizing books to mask difficulty reading, being sent to a specialized school, and ultimately finding creative confidence through poetry and performance.
  • “I'm glad. I then went to a school for dyslexic kids and learned to read.” — Maya Hawke (33:14)
• She humorously discusses attending the elite Brearley School (“the Brearley Beavers”) and quirky Waldorf (Steiner) approaches.

6. The New Album: 'Maitreya Corso' & Artistic Identity

Timestamps: 33:42–37:23

• Maya unpacks the inspiration behind her new album, its fantasy-inspired “mythic self” motifs, and taking on a persona “Maitreya Corso”—a name her mom almost gave her.
  • “It's just a first and a last name of a person and it's like a nom de plume...The album itself is...a journey towards fulfillment.” — Maya Hawke (34:04, 35:10)
• Pete praises the album’s uniqueness and emotionality.
  • “You touched me where time cannot. Yeah, I just lost it on that.” — Pete Holmes (36:06)
• Buddhist themes are referenced, including the symbolic significance of “Maitreya”—the future Buddha.

7. Identity, Family, and Differentiation

Timestamps: 52:45–54:55

• They discuss how Maya’s song “Different” explores the tension between wanting to become like a parent but needing to be yourself.
  • “I wanted to grow up to be just like you. It never was an option, though.” — Maya Hawke lyric (53:19)
• Maya explains the concept of individuation as a spiral, not a straight line—each loop a little farther from childhood dynamics.
  • “Separation from your parents is like a spiral, not a line.” — Maya Hawke quoting her therapist (54:26)

8. Romance, Jealousy, and Partnership Communication

Timestamps: 85:22–105:55

• Pete and Maya get candid on romantic fights and emotional triggers. Maya describes her “Schmeagle” (Gollum) inner monologue and the value of naming anxious, self-sabotaging voices.
  • “Schmeagle is the voice in your head going, like, yeah, that actress is better than you, but I bet if you lost five pounds, you would be as good as her...” — Maya Hawke (87:32)
• They talk about consciously asking for connection, giving “permission to say the worst thing,” and making space in relationships for transparency and messy feelings.
  • “Can I say the worst thing?” — Maya Hawke (104:05)
  • “I’m not shooting you.” — Pete Holmes (99:16)

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Selected Memorable Quotes by Timestamp

• “That's what I like when people give me specifics.” — Pete Holmes (36:03)
• “Friendships and relationships...feel like a better representation of your effort and energy in this world than your career.” — Maya Hawke (16:01)
• “You fill the hole with community, with sturdy relationships...with things you love.” — Maya Hawke (69:47)
• “Most of what's behind that door is, ‘Oh, my God. Really?’” — Maya Hawke on showbiz fulfillment (66:56)
• “I'm not saying the hole is going to go away...but we can lean into what's very useful about it.” — Pete Holmes (70:12)

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Notable & Fun Moments

• Delta 9 weed soda hijinks and “drive safe” as stoner family code (04:34)
• Pete’s heartfelt reaction to Maya’s music: “You touched me where time cannot.” (36:06)
• “The Brearley Beavers” debate on mascots for all-girls schools (31:35)
• Maya’s advocacy for the “Human Revolution”—conscious opposition to uncritical tech/AI adoption (111:23)
• “Are shadows real?” Spiraling sibling metaphysics debate after her wedding (114:44)
• “Sunglasses or Shiv?”—riffing on not keeping sunglasses as self-care (84:15)

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AI & Technology Segment

Timestamps: 106:00–112:45

• Maya expresses strong skepticism toward AI and social media, advocating for collective resistance and more human connection.
  • “I just think that, like, we should be people...Let's invest in each other and in people and start the human revolution.” — Maya Hawke (111:26)
• Pete challenges popular “doomsday” AI narratives, referencing different expert perspectives, but agrees that conscious, limited use is wise.
  • “We have a lot more agency than we think.” — Pete Holmes (112:30)

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Audience, Representation, and Privacy

Timestamps: 75:43–77:33

• Maya reflects on her audience ("kids like me when I was young: a little weird, big feelings, crochet, confused sexuality") and the odd intimacy and privacy calculations required as a public figure.

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Endnote: Laughter, Shadows, and Gratitude

Timestamps: 112:45–115:40

• Maya recalls one of her hardest laughs: a post-wedding, hours-long, philosophical sibling debate about the reality of shadows and the infamous “blue and black dress.”
• Pete revisits the album’s closing lyric: “I still fit nicely tucked in your shadow. That's a great line.”
• They end on warmth, respect, and Maya’s enthusiasm for investing in human connections—along with her album Maitreya Corso.

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Final Sign-off

• Maya Hawke: “Keep it crispy.” (116:05)

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Episode Flow Outline with Timestamps

| Segment | Topic/Key Point | Timestamp | |---|---|---| | 1 | Weed stories, gratitude, “screensaver” views | 03:13–11:19 | | 2 | Luck, success, and relationships | 14:00–16:34 | | 3 | The drive to “make it,” fulfillment as a trap | 17:24–20:43 | | 4 | Craft, resilience, celebrity cycles | 20:43–24:07 | | 5 | Artistic identity, new album | 33:42–37:23 | | 6 | Family origins, dyslexia, creative self-discovery | 25:04–34:04 | | 7 | Parts work, therapy, individuation | 52:45–56:39 | | 8 | Podcasting about romantic/inner life, communication, “Schmeagle”, permission for realness | 85:22–105:34 | | 9 | AI, Human Revolution, tech skepticism | 106:00–112:45 | | 10 | Laughter, sibling debates, closing warmth | 112:45–116:08 |

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Summary Takeaway

Maya Hawke and Pete Holmes deliver an episode that’s a microcosm of creative life: full of humor, insight, candor, and heart. Discussions traverse the difficulty of believing in “nothing,” imposter syndrome and fulfillment, the joys and pitfalls of being raised in artistic households, and the enduring power of human connection to fill deeper needs. Maya emerges as both deeply self-aware and endearingly “weird,” advocating for craft, relationships, laughter, and the “human revolution.”

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Listen for:

• Honest perspectives on fame, ambition, and mental health
• Practical relationship tools: “parts work,” asking for connection, “permission to say the worst thing”
• Delightful riffs on music, therapy, acting, and why AI needs more resistance and less hype
• The perfect blend of lightness and depth—embodying the “You Made It Weird” spirit

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Transcript

[Maya Hawke]

Lemonade.

[Pete Holmes]

You made it Weird with Pete Holmes.

[Podcast Announcer]

What's happening, weirdos? This is a very big episode.

[Pete Holmes]

Obviously.

[Podcast Announcer]

This is Maya Hawk, who you love from Stranger Things, the movie Do Revenge. She's Maya Hawk. I sort of can't believe she's here. I'm so glad she is. We had an awesome chat.

[Pete Holmes]

We'll get to that very, very quickly. Just a couple things to plug up.

[Podcast Announcer]

Top my kids book spells to cast on your parents.

[Pete Holmes]

Boom. There it is.

[Podcast Announcer]

It's a book that makes, you know, the kid cast a spell, makes the person, the grown up reading it to them do ridiculous things. It's funny, it's fun, it's light, and it kind of teaches kids how to read.

[Pete Holmes]

So that's kind of a win. That's kind of a win there.

[Podcast Announcer]

There's also my tour dates, which are all on petehomes.com silly silly fun Boy, which is my newest Special is on YouTube.com and also on May 24, which is a Sunday at 10am we are going to be releasing I Am not for Everyone which was previously on Netflix, also for free on YouTube, but we're going to do a premiere on Sunday, May 24th. So if you love that special or if you haven't seen it before and been wondering where it was, that's the first group. If the first group loved it and

[Pete Holmes]

wondering where it went, we're putting it

[Podcast Announcer]

on YouTube on Sunday, May 24th and I'm going to be there live chatting with you guys.

[Pete Holmes]

10am when we upload it on my YouTube channel for everyone to have. Everyone to have for free and petehomes.com denver who cares? A lot. A lot of good ones up on there.

[Podcast Announcer]

Largo here in la. Hope you can be there in the meantime.

[Pete Holmes]

So glad you're here.

[Podcast Announcer]

Maya Hawk. So happy this happened. You're about to enjoy it. Thank you for joining. Get into it.

[Pete Holmes]

Amazon Pharmacy presents Painful Thoughts it's been

[Maya Hawke]

a long, bumpy road dealing with yet another bladder infection and driving to the pharmacy to pick up meds. I went over a pothole and a little pee came out. So now I get to stand in line with pee pee pants.

[Pete Holmes]

Next time, skip the pain and get fast. Free delivery with Amazon Pharmacy. Healthcare just got less painful.

[Maya Hawke]

I am so obsessed with your show.

[Pete Holmes]

What show?

[Maya Hawke]

You're crashing.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, no way. Really?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. It's so amazing. Did you know that I have so many questions for you about it. I really like.

[Pete Holmes]

You're welcome. Are we rolling? Feeling. I'm glad we got the compliment.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, it's important. It's important to get to capture the compliment.

[Pete Holmes]

Capture the authentic compliment. That is for you. Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

My magic mind. Awesome. Does it do. Does it work?

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, you'll love it. I love it.

[Maya Hawke]

Do it. Am I going to be like, goofy?

[Pete Holmes]

Shake it up first. No, no, no, you won't be goofy. It's like a little caffeine. Do you do caffeine?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, I do caffeine.

[Pete Holmes]

You'll be. You'll love it.

[Maya Hawke]

It'll be just fine.

[Pete Holmes]

It's just like a little bit of Matcha, but some other stuff. By the way, I wasn't gonna mention this, but so two nights ago, Katie, you should know this. Like, everyone should know this. I have to make, like, an announcement. I did these shows in Dallas. And then after the show, my wonderful opener lovingly, graciously gave me a little edible. She was like, because I don't do a lot of pot. But if I'm gonna do it after a nice long weekend of shows, that's a nice little break. I. I was like, how much is it? It's this little gummy. And she goes, it's 150 milligrams. And I just think she's wrong. Katie, your face. I'm telling. This is on me.

[Maya Hawke]

You think she's lying? I just think there's no way. It must be 10. The whole bag must be 150 milligrams. And so she. I like, how many gummies are in the bag? 10 gummies in a bag.

[Pete Holmes]

I thought that's what. Thank you for understanding.

[Maya Hawke]

Logical conclusion to come to.

[Pete Holmes]

Because I'm like, no one hands someone a gumm. That's 150 milligrams.

[Maya Hawke]

No, it's insane.

[Pete Holmes]

If anybody listening doesn't do pot.

[Maya Hawke]

That's like an insane amount of pot.

[Pete Holmes]

Fifteen times a big dose.

[Maya Hawke]

I eat a gummy sometimes to go to sleep. The entire box of gummies is 10 milligrams.

[Pete Holmes]

That's what I mean.

[Maya Hawke]

One gummy is two.

[Pete Holmes]

If I take 10, I'm like, bye. It's like a huge experience for me.

[Maya Hawke]

What we say in our house when we get two stoned is we go, drive safe. Because my little sister last Christmas, like, there were some people that were really annoying her, like, at the house over for Christmas. And she was like, I can't handle this, and I can't. And one of them went, maybe we should kind of get going soon. She goes, drive safe. She was so st. She was like, leave. Like, even before they, like, put their stuff in their bag. Drive safe.

[Pete Holmes]

Drive safe. That's a great two stone line.

[Maya Hawke]

It's a great two stone line. Just. It's like, drive safe.

[Pete Holmes]

Drive safe. I like drive safe too, because it's not stopping anyone from leaving. It's like, I'm okay with you leaving.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, drive safe.

[Pete Holmes]

I love drive safe. It's. We don't have to go through it beat by beat, but I am pretty foggy. Like, I.

[Maya Hawke]

You ate this weed gummy.

[Pete Holmes]

No, this was two. Yeah, it was two nights ago.

[Maya Hawke]

Sorry. Yeah, we got off the subject.

[Pete Holmes]

No, no. You're the subject.

[Maya Hawke]

No.

[Pete Holmes]

And I don't want to start with a long story. I do want you to know where I'm coming from.

[Maya Hawke]

You're coming from 110 milligrams.

[Pete Holmes]

No, I take. I ate half of it.

[Maya Hawke]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

Because she said we were in Texas and she's like, the weed here is not as strong. It's called Delta 9.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, my God.

[Pete Holmes]

Wait, what? This is what they did after I ate it too. So I ate it. They were like, don't Worry, it's Delta 9. It's not as strong. I eat half of this thing. That's 75. 75, dude. But I'm like, it's 75 of some like Mormon, like, Utah weed. Like, I thought it was like the Latter Day Saint weed and I ate it. It wasn't lds, it was lsd. It was the strongest. It was one of the strongest drug experiences I've ever had in my life.

[Maya Hawke]

Okay. So when I was working out in Atlanta, Christian and I were both out there and like, you know, weeds, not really legal there yet. And so, yeah, they have like a weed day festival. It's like legal to carry but not to buy or something like that.

[Pete Holmes]

It's one of those in a journey, they can't stay. Stop you to search you, but like just. Just go all the way.

[Maya Hawke]

But they have these weird things there. Remember, Atlanta is also in Georgia. You remember? Unfortunately for Atlanta, you forget, sorry, Atlanta. But anyway, so they sell these sodas at the store. They're like Delta 9 sodas. And I was like, oh, this is fun. So we started because, like, you know, we would go to the store and buy these Delta 9 sodas. Be like, this is great. This is awesome. A week goes by of having. We, like, what? I think we're dumb now. Yeah, like, we got the Delta 9. Just like, it's not quite. Like, it's not 60s flowers and rainbows and like, I have a cool idea. It's. I have no idea. It's like the clonapin of Weed, like

[Pete Holmes]

shut your brain off.

[Maya Hawke]

It's like. It's like, go, go, go.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Maya Hawke]

Powered down.

[Pete Holmes]

I'll tell you, if you take 30 times what you took, it's. It. It was just a psychedelic.

[Maya Hawke]

What happened? It was a psychedelic.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, the funniest part is what you were saying, like the Delta Nineness. I took it and then I was like, really worried that I had just taken seven. Like, it just. It kind of hit me after you ate it. Yeah. And then the person who gave it to me was like, don't worry, it's not that strong. And then someone else in the room was like, no, I took Delta 9 once. I took like 10 and I tripped. I like tripped. And I'm just like trying to stay calm. I'm in the green room of the club and like, I just.

[Maya Hawke]

Pre show or post show?

[Pete Holmes]

This is after, of course. Okay.

[Maya Hawke]

Thank goodness.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. So I was in a good state.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

A good set.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And setting. I was. I don't know about the setting, but all I did was I was like, you guys need to get me out of here. You need to get me to.

[Maya Hawke]

I need to be in my hotel right now.

[Pete Holmes]

And once I got to the hotel, it was amazing. It was glorious. It. It so easily could have gone the

[Maya Hawke]

other way, but it was glorious.

[Pete Holmes]

It was glorious. I kept looking at the room and going, this is. I was alone. Like, it would have been a funny scene in an indie movie. It's the kind of thing that's hard to act.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

Because but when you're doing it, you're like, oh, people really do do this. Yes. It's hard to remember that as an actor.

[Maya Hawke]

Very hard to remember.

[Pete Holmes]

Sometimes it really is stupid and sometimes it is cliche. I was looking at my hands. That's cliche.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And I was going to the room. I was going, no notes to reality. I was going, no notes. I couldn't have meant it more. And I was love, Maya. I was loving myself. Like, I wasn't doing it to like cope. I was going to. You are a beautiful boy. You're a beautiful boy. And I meant it.

[Maya Hawke]

So beautiful.

[Pete Holmes]

It was just like a sauna. It was like a hot tub of love.

[Maya Hawke]

That's so beautiful.

[Pete Holmes]

And I was kind of like, please be gentle with me. And I just kept the lights on. And I slept with the lights on. Cuz when I turned them off, I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Drive safe.

[Maya Hawke]

That's so funny.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, the reason I tell you is. I'm so excited. I took a sauna when I got home to sweat it out, and I've exercised twice because I was like, I'm excited that you're on the show.

[Maya Hawke]

Well, I'm excited to be on the show. And you don't seem foggy at all. And also, I deeply understand, and I love. I'm a beautiful boy.

[Pete Holmes]

It was so emotional, and I love this dude's beautiful. It was.

[Maya Hawke]

That's my favorite thing that sometimes happens when you get stoned is, like, profound gratitude.

[Pete Holmes]

You can get into that.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, we're on tour right now, and we were in San Francisco and, like, the hotel had a balcony.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And we went out on the balcony and, like, got a little stoned. It was me and Christian and our fiddle player, Odessa, who's in the band with us. We got all those done, and I was looking out at the view, and. You ever see a view, like, how. You know, how the Internet has ruined our life? Because now when we look at a view, we're like, it looks like a screensaver. So it was like kind of a full screensaver view. I know.

[Pete Holmes]

Bummer that you just said. You're like, well, I guess we can wake this up. And it's a desktop.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, exactly.

[Pete Holmes]

Or it's your phone.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. It's just like, ugh.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, you're right. The most beautiful things now look like screensavers. Wallpapers and screensavers. Yes, my friend. Sorry to interrupt, but Michael Gunger, who's another amazing musician, he has a credit. He was on. He did a sensory deprivation tank, and I think he was on some drug. And then he came out and he was paying for the time with his Visa card. And the wallpaper, I guess you can say, of the Visa card was the Milky Way. And he was, like, tripping, and he's like, we're here. And then, like, we came here, and we got to a place where we put pictures of our galaxy on our money.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, that is crazy.

[Pete Holmes]

That's drug funny. It's kind of funny to us. But if you're on drugs, that's the funniest. It's a cliche. It's another cliche.

[Maya Hawke]

It's another, like, diversion from the story that I was trying to tell. But that was also not a good story.

[Pete Holmes]

No, you were on a balcony looking at a screen set.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes, But I also weirdly watched a video the other day of someone talking about the fact that they got off social media because they saw a picture from the top of Mount Everest and they Were like, I didn't do anything to earn this view. Like, this is a view that people have crawled over dead bodies to see. And now I'm just like, cool. Next, bro.

[Pete Holmes]

That's a lot what you just said. You've already really kind of. Well, I'm in a vulnerable way. You've shifted my brain. They're absolutely right.

[Maya Hawke]

That's someone else's take.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't remember who, but it's like that's. It's funny. I was just taking a very strong dose of drugs. That's the risk with drugs too, is they give you a great feeling with no effort whatsoever. Yes, you could say that about most things. It's not just drugs. I mean, people are like, drugs are drugs.

[Maya Hawke]

But then there's roller coaster.

[Pete Holmes]

All sorts of stuff. Well, yeah, at least there's some courage involved in a roller coaster. But I know what you mean. Like seeing the photo of the top of Everest or even seeing the pictures from, you know, the space satellite.

[Maya Hawke]

Totally.

[Pete Holmes]

It's like, wow, Would you go to space? No.

[Maya Hawke]

Me neither. No, I don't care at all.

[Pete Holmes]

Zero, zero.

[Maya Hawke]

I care zero percent zero. I don't want to go. I'm not interested.

[Pete Holmes]

How many movies do we need where a sad dad is sending fucking zoom messages to his family as he dies in a tin?

[Maya Hawke]

No, no.

[Pete Holmes]

Or are they doing that to discourage us? Is it really awesome up there?

[Maya Hawke]

Who knows? But I think not. I think any place where you're like eating like freeze dried. I've bought that candy at the science museum. I don't want to eat that for a year.

[Pete Holmes]

Why is it always Neapolitan too? Can't I just get chocolate? I don't want to fight through bad strawberry. To just have a mozzarella stick of vanilla and then eat the chocolate.

[Maya Hawke]

Just give me the chocolate.

[Pete Holmes]

So you're on the balcony and you.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm on the balcony.

[Pete Holmes]

Are you saying it unlock gratitude? Is that what you.

[Maya Hawke]

I had a proffer profound moment of gratitude. But weirdly, it was like transmuted in a way that things don't normally feel good to me. But I was like, whoa, my simulation is awesome. Whatever space alien is playing, the video game of my life is doing such a good job. Like, wow, I'm on this balcony, I'm having a fight about the Pope with the love of my life. And like, and, and I am so, like. And it's so fun and I'm having such a good time. And I'm like, and it's beautiful. And I just played sold out show. And, like, what do I have to complain about? Like, this is amazing. I love my simulation.

[Pete Holmes]

That's beautiful.

[Maya Hawke]

This is incredible.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't know. Again, I'm not a huge weed person, but every once in a while, I'll take an edible or something, and it drops me into that place of, like. And I'm not trying to brag. This isn't, like a rise and grind motivational video, but I look at my house and I go, I bought this with, like, talking about my butt. And that's not. There's a way to say that that's a brag. And there's a way to say that where you're like, I can't believe how lucky I am, how fortunate I am that. That, like, where you were in the culture was valued or something. You had to say, like, right place, right time, whatever you want to say.

[Maya Hawke]

Built you a house. Yeah, it's beautiful.

[Pete Holmes]

And the circumstance, I'm getting more and more into that. Like, I was just. So there's this podcast called Barry's Economics. I was watching it, and they just talk about. It's another comedian named Barry, and he was talking about how they really underplay. People tend to underplay not just luck, but, like, time and place, circumstance, and all that sort of stuff. And then take a billionaire talks about what he did, and really what he's doing is kind of. What I'm saying is. And I'm guilty of this too, like, oh, get up at 6 and take a cold plunge. And it's like, that's actually not why you made it at all.

[Maya Hawke]

Not at all.

[Pete Holmes]

At all.

[Maya Hawke]

No.

[Pete Holmes]

It's what. You started doing it after you made it.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. And maybe it feels good and that can be enough.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe just that.

[Maya Hawke]

Maybe the fact that it feels good and that that makes you happy right now, Great.

[Pete Holmes]

But we turn it into this, like, resting.

[Maya Hawke]

Rise and grind.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. We don't want to think. The point that Barry's Economics was making is, like, so many people follow all the protocols and it doesn't happen.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

So the gratitude for me now has a bigger dose of, like, holy shit. The Plinko went all these different. Do you know what Plinko is? You're only 20. Doesn't matter.

[Maya Hawke]

I feel like the fact that you did this with your hand makes me think. It's a ball. You drop down and, like, falls through little.

[Pete Holmes]

It's a pocke, but yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. Okay, cool.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. I'm glad. This is why we talk with our hands.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, it works. This is why you film the podcast.

[Pete Holmes]

That's right.

[Maya Hawke]

But mostly you don't miss this.

[Pete Holmes]

It's bigger on audio than it is on videos of. People are going to have to come

[Maya Hawke]

over to the YouTube to watch you do the blink.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't like the word luck, but I do like the appreciation of context.

[Maya Hawke]

I think that's why my moment of gratitude was like, I'm so grateful to the alien playing me in this video game, because it didn't feel like it had anything to do with me.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, I don't think it does.

[Maya Hawke]

It felt like just total lucky.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like. Like just moments of luck that. The one thing that I actually do feel has to do with me is, like, my relationships. And I don't know if you feel this way, but, like, friendships and relationships and how you work on them and how you take care of them.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Feel like a better representation of, like, your effort and energy in this world.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Than, like, your career, the, you know, like, your circumstance that led you to this place. But I do feel like I don't know or I hope that your relationships are in. They involve luck, because how did you meet this person? How did this happen? What happened to them? To turn them into the version of this person that is right for you.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Maya Hawke]

But then there's also so much work that goes into it, and that's, like, one of the only things I feel proud of in my life is like.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

The work that I put into sustaining my relationships.

[Pete Holmes]

I mean, look, I'm not among. I'm gonna give myself three. Referencing how young you are, because that is something you tend to figure out later in life. That's all I'll say.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, I'll just. I have. No. Don't call me young.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. Thing I remember I made a joke about Bo Burnham being young when I interviewed him on my talk show, and he. He was not chill about it, really. He was fine. But I could tell I had touched a touch, maybe touched a nerve. It's hard to tell with Beau, but I was like, I don't want to do that to you. You're 26.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm 27.

[Pete Holmes]

Seven.

[Maya Hawke]

But I wonder if there's a thing, like. I remember it used to bother me when people told me I was young when I was, like, 24. But I wonder if 27 is already old for an actress.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

So I'm like, young.

[Pete Holmes]

We're done with you. 27?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

No, it's old for Leonardo DiCaprio. I think he's gonna be an actor for a lot longer.

[Maya Hawke]

No, Totally. But it's like, I don't know. I wake up all the time and I'm like, oh, my God, it's over. I didn't. I mean, this is. Shows you how crazy. I'm like, I didn't make it before I was 22, and now you'll never make it.

[Pete Holmes]

Really?

[Maya Hawke]

And which is funny because most people will be like, didn't you make it? What are you talking about?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, but, like, are you touching on something that's very real, even when you've made it? And whatever that. And I do think that means something. I do think there is a making it. I. I kind of take issue when people are like, there is no making it. There is a making it.

[Maya Hawke]

There's a making it. People who make it don't necessarily experience themselves as having made it. But that doesn't mean there's not a making it.

[Pete Holmes]

There is a making it. And that has a lot to do with, you know, finding expression, not feeling all that frustration that you want to, like, prove yourself and make your mark and all that stuff that's real. And when that gets what I was

[Maya Hawke]

or just even has to simply do with being able to take care of yourself by doing the thing you love. That's making it.

[Pete Holmes]

I completely agree. So that's making it. What was the other thing we were saying? Oh, feeling like you've made it.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

So is a very different thing.

[Maya Hawke]

Very different.

[Pete Holmes]

I know a lot of people who have made it. You could say way more than I have, but they don't feel like they know it.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Sign for the delivery of fulfillment showed up, and they just kept getting UPS slips on their door that said the fulfillment was here and they just weren't home.

[Maya Hawke]

It's so true. I was. I, like, I had a big. My fulfillment delivery once. Came in the mail.

[Pete Holmes]

It's called Amazon Fulfillment Center.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. This podcast is brought to you by Amazon Fulfillment Center.

[Pete Holmes]

We're not, but we are. But add promo code weird for 20% added. No, but isn't it weird? It's called fulfillment.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Anyway, the riff works on one level, but.

[Maya Hawke]

Wait, wait, Sorry. This is a real thing.

[Pete Holmes]

When you miss a package, you get an email from the Amazon fulfillment.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh. Oh, sorry. I thought it was. This was a joke about how.

[Pete Holmes]

Whoa. Yeah. Yeah. When you get a package, it's from the Amazon Fulfillment Center.

[Maya Hawke]

Whoa. Crazy. I was. That makes sense. Okay. I didn't pick up on that. Cheers. But I was walking down the street and I was talking to Christian, and he was like, that's my husband. Christian Lee Hudson is my husband.

[Pete Holmes]

You call him your husband?

[Maya Hawke]

My husband Hudsband, and Christianly husband Hudspin.

[Pete Holmes]

He's your new husband.

[Maya Hawke]

He's my new husband. And we were walking down the street, and I was talking about, like, my ambition and. Which is, like, a lot of what this record that I made is about, But I was, like, talking a lot about my ambition, like, how unhappy it was making me, and that I was a failure and that I was never going to work again. After stranger that was going on, he was. Was like, all right, I just have a question. Like, when. When would it be enough? Like, when What? What? Describe to me the circumstances that would have to happen for you to feel like you'd. You'd made it.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And I got quiet for a long time, and then I had this, like, eureka moment where I was like, oh, when it was too much. The only time I would ever feel like I'd really made it is if I'd ruined my life.

[Pete Holmes]

Wow.

[Maya Hawke]

I'd made it so much that I was unable to do the things that I loved. That's when I'd be like, oh, definitely, I'm successful enough.

[Pete Holmes]

You need to walk by, like, a toppled statue of you.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, you were the leader. And then they toppled it, and you're like, I did make it, though.

[Maya Hawke]

I did make it, though. Yeah. And that realization that that's what I was aspiring to, like, changed my life.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

I was like, oh, okay, cool. Like, I need to shift.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Because that's not. I don't want to ruin my life.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

I don't want the toppled statue.

[Pete Holmes]

And you realize you might have inherited a set of dreams from a culture that doesn't really care about you. You know what I mean? Like, we see that as, like, the thing you're supposed to peak. And then, like, when are we gonna. I'm curious if we ever will, like, turn on Taylor Swift, for example. Like, will. Will there be a time when everybody. I'm not trying for a hot take. I know you're also doing music. That's not what I'm like. You know what I'm saying? Like, it's like, we make things and then we eat them.

[Maya Hawke]

Well, I mean, I think that what she would probably say is that that's happen times and that the thing that is special about her is that she, like, continues to kind of, like, re. Innovate herself and be kind of born again and come back and that. Like, I do think that no matter what happens with your circumstance in this industry, Right. Like if imagining different variants of doing okay in the arts that if you are rooted in a core of craft, you can weather the storm of being made a statue of and had a statue toppled.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

Again, you don't take it seriously, or you do, but you can weather it because your craft is there. Like, I'm sure you would say this, like, if everything went to hell in a handbasket and you.

[Pete Holmes]

At least you have a hand basket.

[Maya Hawke]

At least you have a hand basket. And you could. You'd probably be like, you'd figure it out. You'd find a way to keep doing comedy because you're great at comedy and you love comedy. And that's a craft that you have in a tool. And you could do it.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

But you could go back to where you started or you could figure out something else to, you know, like. But you've got that basis in craft, right?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And anyone who has a basis in craft, I think, can. Can weather any sort of storm.

[Pete Holmes]

Right. Which is why. And I'm not trying to drag anybody, but that's why the, the modern day influencer is more shaky. We just go like.

[Maya Hawke]

It's why you worry about them.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, you worry about them because it's

[Maya Hawke]

like, what it's like just.

[Pete Holmes]

It can be. I'm not thinking of anybody in particular right now. I'm just saying it can really blur the line between art and commerce. And then you do become about numbers and you're kind of like your own network and you already just trying to sell something and you. Or you might be just trying to sell something and you're not compelled to do something. Like, you don't have like an artistic compulsion that gets you out of bed in the morning. You're like getting up. It kind of breaks my heart. You're getting up to check like the stats on some video.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Instead of writing down a line for

[Maya Hawke]

a song, for a song or an idea or. Yeah. And like, I mean, some people are performance artists, right? Like, Like, I. Sometimes I look at some influencers and I'm like, oh, like, like, are you connected to the tradition of Maria Abramovic? Like, are you. Are you trying perform. Is this performance art? Yeah, and sometimes I think it might be. And then maybe that person, like, you know, global Internet influencer. Some.

[Pete Holmes]

You think some influencers are like, going for it, like in another level, are like performance artists?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, it's funny because Andy Warhol was. Was sort of famously like, he was totally an influencer. That's what I mean. Yeah. He was just like, I like making money. I like making things that people sell. I like making people talk about the same thing.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

So, yeah, he was. There is. It's funny that I will give him a pass because he was doing it with a camera. You know what I mean? As opposed to an app.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

But he was doing.

[Maya Hawke]

Well, we're just. This is a new frontier. Right. And it's unclear what it's going to be. It's very clear what a lot of it is. But there's definitely interesting and amazing creative people who are, like, getting their start that way.

[Pete Holmes]

Right, right.

[Maya Hawke]

And are trying to figure out what to do with that and do interesting things on it.

[Pete Holmes]

That's just their trumpet.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, that's their trumpet. And, like, I think there are some people who use that as their trumpet who, if the global Internet went down, you would find them on a street corner, like, putting up, I don't know, like. Like weird beach umbrellas that had different words on them and being like, stand under this beach umbrella if you believe in Jesus. Stand out of this umbrella if you believe in Allah. And now everybody hug. Like, I don't know, like.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, then a breeze blows all the

[Maya Hawke]

umbrellas down, and then everyone laughs and he sings and he. And he jitters and he d. Like. And then. And, like, makes everybody hold hands and. And. And primal scream. I don't. And, like, that could be interesting.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's funny. I. I don't know. I loved it. What are you nuts? I was just trying to think of what SPF Jesus is the g. Some. Some umbrellas, you sit under them, you're still getting a burn. Just know that.

[Maya Hawke]

That it's true.

[Pete Holmes]

That's wisdom. That's wisdom. You got to put on sunblock.

[Maya Hawke]

You got to put on sunblock.

[Pete Holmes]

When did your mom break? Cuz I feel like young. It was young.

[Maya Hawke]

Young.

[Pete Holmes]

I was just thinking about Uma Thurman on the way in, because, you know, that's your mom.

[Maya Hawke]

Cuz I'm related to her.

[Pete Holmes]

Cuz you related to her.

[Maya Hawke]

But I was like, I was thinking about your mom on the way in, too.

[Pete Holmes]

I mean, I hope so.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

My mom's in Kill Bill. She's anonymous, Asian dead number 30. That's how she's credited. It says, anonymous Asian dead number 30. Irina Holmes. And Quentin was so mean to her. I don't know why I'm saying any of this.

[Maya Hawke]

It's incredible.

[Pete Holmes]

But Kill Bill is the thing that most people like.

[Maya Hawke]

She's Pulp Fiction.

[Pete Holmes]

Really? Well, yeah. Why am I telling you? You tell me.

[Maya Hawke]

Pulp. I would say.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, how old is she? Broke her.

[Maya Hawke]

Like that was. She was nominated for Best Actress, right? Like Best Supporting Actress. And like, she was younger than me at the time. I don't remember how old, but younger than me, really. Yeah. And then Baron Munchausen was before that and Dangerous Liaisons was before that.

[Pete Holmes]

She's such a woman.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Your mom is like a classy woman. She always grown so. I can't believe she was.

[Maya Hawke]

She's the most dignified person I've ever met.

[Pete Holmes]

So she. I can't believe she was. Yeah, I didn't even think of that.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, she was really.

[Pete Holmes]

She has like a. Elegant, like a. Like her fingers are like piano keys. Yes, right.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes, she has a very.

[Pete Holmes]

But aren't don't you. I feel like seeing you here, having seen you in movies and TV and stuff, but seeing you in person, my first thought was like, you're looking more like your mom. Is that like a thing?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. Well, sometimes when I get on tv, I, like, start doing this thing. And like, I got this whole guy that, like, is like. I don't know, you know, like. And like, I don't know if I developed that guy to try to not be compared to this guy or something. I don't know what exactly.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, it's hard to be met with.

[Maya Hawke]

It's hard to be measured.

[Pete Holmes]

Porcelain.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

But I remember going to Woodstock, New York, and someone was like, that's Uma Thurman's house.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, really?

[Pete Holmes]

Were you. Is that true?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, my grandparents live there. My grandparents are on One hill. My mom's in the Valley.

[Pete Holmes]

And, um, Thurman lives there.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. I didn't know who I've been meaning to talk to, who I was one of the things on my list of things to talk to.

[Pete Holmes]

No, it's on my list too, because I met him at a Ram Dass retreat. He's very interesting person.

[Maya Hawke]

Well, my. For the first thing I ever saw of you is a joke that you tell about people who believe in nothing. And it really reminded me of my grandfather because he always talks about the nothing people. He calls them the nothing people and is like, they have their own religion. They worship nothing.

[Pete Holmes]

But it's.

[Maya Hawke]

But nothing is something. And like, it's the. The. And that religion has practices and. And belief systems and ways that you can get cast out of it. And like, he kind of talks about.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, there's like cardinal sins of the nothing people.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes, there are.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. If you, like, hear a voice or

[Maya Hawke]

have a vision or Disagree with a statistic. Or they're like. Like, you know, or are like the. It's kind of. There's a big. There. It's hitting. He would say, like, it's not that I don't believe in science or like, I do, but people who think it's important that you only believe in science are as dogmatic as any other.

[Pete Holmes]

This is what Bobby Therm.

[Maya Hawke]

This is what old. Old Bobby. Bobby T. Talks about Thanksgiving.

[Pete Holmes]

He gets into it sometimes. He likes talking about it. What I remember about seeing. First of all, I'm not surprised when I did that joke, I was like, I kind of can't believe I'm the first person to get to make this joke. Because that. It's an amazing joke right there.

[Maya Hawke]

It's a brilliant. It's an incredible joke.

[Pete Holmes]

I really appreciate it.

[Maya Hawke]

It made me. Yeah, I was.

[Pete Holmes]

But he's a Buddhist.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And Buddhists are big nothing people. But it's the luminous emptiness. The keyword has to be the luminous.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

So it's.

[Maya Hawke]

But he doesn't speak about the nothing people in a derogatory way.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

When you say nothing people, it sounds quite derogatory. But that's not what he means. He just. It just. He just means that like, that. That's also.

[Pete Holmes]

That's what I'm trying to do. In the joke that you did, you

[Maya Hawke]

do it very well.

[Pete Holmes]

Believe in nothing. You also. But it's not like Nana. You believe in. You believe in a magical nothing. It's like, no, we all believe in nothing. We all believe in not a thing.

[Maya Hawke]

In a mysterious. Like, dark matter. Right. It's like a mysterious, invisible power that controls the universe and we don't know where. It's like.

[Pete Holmes]

Right?

[Maya Hawke]

Huh? Totally. Yeah, man.

[Pete Holmes]

Right?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. You write that one down. Like science.

[Pete Holmes]

I see this all the time. I see it in science that is very interested in space. I'm interested in space as well. But I think what they're. To use a Rupert spiral word, what they're tasting when they behold the enormity of the universe is their own inner enormity. They're t. They're tasting their own essential nature. Some people get it from looking at a telescope photo. Yeah. And some people. I can't. I can't speak for anybody. I sometimes get it from a telescopic photo, and I sometimes get it from sitting quietly, but it's the same vastness. The. The space of the universe and the space, your inner space, are actually the same.

[Maya Hawke]

One of the things I get it from the most is thinking about the vast. Like the way that a brain scan looks so much like a picture of space.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

Like if you just look at neurons zapping around, it looks so much like, like of things on different levels of size.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And like that really all.

[Pete Holmes]

I believe it's called Lee Li. It's the study. It's a Chinese art of looking. I think it's Chinese looking for patterns that look the same. The way that, like when you're flying over a mountain, it looks like the back of a turtle.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. Like everything is a golden ratio. Everything is like.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, right, right. Exactly. The Fibonacci. The Fibonacci Series 2 dum dum saying,

[Maya Hawke]

no, I'm a dumb. Dumb. I'm a dumb. I went to a Steiner school and I learned about the Fibonacci sequence by talking about rabbit sex.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh.

[Maya Hawke]

And I couldn't explain to you. I've tried since I remember learning about that. I couldn't explain to you how it works.

[Pete Holmes]

But it's like rabbits have sex with the first rabbit and the seventh rabbit.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. And it was. My teacher was like, these are. What's the word for people who. Polygamous rabbits. She was like, we're going to learn about the Fibonacci sequence by talking about polygamous rabbits. So you have polygamous incestuous rabbits. Because you have to be okay with the rabbits. Rabbits.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

In order to really get there and to understand it, you have to be okay with rabbits having sex with their own family and. Yeah, well, in the Fibonacci example.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, okay. Oh, in order to under.

[Maya Hawke]

It was a metaphor.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. I thought you were really.

[Maya Hawke]

No, it was a metaphor. To understand the Fibonacci secrets by talking about rabbits. And that's why you should all send your kids to a Steiner school because they're awesome.

[Pete Holmes]

Because you had dyslexia and you went to a school where they had no grades. I also went to a school where they had no grades.

[Maya Hawke]

I first went to a really hoity toity school called Brearly where, like, girls wear uniforms. It was like, Brearley, Brierly. The Brearly Beavers. It's an all girls school.

[Pete Holmes]

You can't be an all girls school called the Brearly Beavers.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes, you can. Twat. Yeah, Twat, Twat. Are you talking about twat? Am I talking about. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Wow.

[Maya Hawke]

An all girls school called the Brearley Beavers. Or that's their mascot. They're just called Brearley. And I went there until third grade and then in Third grade. They were like, so we think your kid's been tricking us and that she can't read, but she's been tricking us into thinking that she can read by memorizing books.

[Pete Holmes]

Is that what you were doing?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. And then they were like, so now she can't go to school here anymore? And so then I went to a school for kids with learning disabilities.

[Pete Holmes]

Wait, they were booting you for being like a little genius?

[Maya Hawke]

They were like, we probably think that she would be best fit. We'll keep her if you want, but we think she would probably do better somewhere else.

[Pete Holmes]

My daughter sometimes does that. I think all kids. You were just doing it.

[Maya Hawke]

I was severely. Could not read.

[Pete Holmes]

Right. Let me not mince words. I couldn't read words.

[Maya Hawke]

I couldn't read them. Could look at the first letter and be like, and I see a picture of a hat. And that one starts with an H hat.

[Pete Holmes]

But look again. I love 2026 for so many reasons. One of them is like, the Benefit of the doubt for kids. I go like, this isn't intelligent in the way that we want or that our intention. But it is intelligent in this other way. And we just didn't have that in the 80s. We were like, dumb.

[Maya Hawke]

You didn't get that? You got dumb.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm listening to you being like, oh, she saw a picture of a hat on H. That's. That's a type of intelligence.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, that's great.

[Pete Holmes]

And you tricked a bunch of grown ups for a while.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, that's. Thank you. Cheers. It's good job, but I'm glad. I then went to a school for dyslexic kids and learned to read. And then I went to a Steiner school. And then I went to another school that didn't have grades.

[Pete Holmes]

What's a Steiner school?

[Maya Hawke]

A Waldorf school.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, okay.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, yeah, great salads, great crayons, great pension.

[Pete Holmes]

So you found the education you needed.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And then because I had loving parents

[Maya Hawke]

who were like, what does this kid need? And then like, did research and went like, probably here.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. By the way, your album is so good. What is it called?

[Maya Hawke]

Maitreya Corso.

[Pete Holmes]

My Treya Corso. I didn't know that.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, that's what it's called.

[Pete Holmes]

Wait, what does that mean? My Troya. My Traya Corso Press tour. By the way, Ding Dongs like me going, what is. What is that?

[Maya Hawke]

No, no, it's just a name.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, it's.

[Maya Hawke]

It's just a first and a last name of a person and it's Like a nom de plume.

[Pete Holmes]

This is your Chris Gaines album.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. But it's like. It was a name that was gonna get. My mom wanted to name me, but then I didn't get named, and I've kept it, and I like it. And I've been reading a lot of fantasy literature in the last year and, like, obsessively and, like, really loving it and feeling very inspired by a kind of, like, the mythical self, like, the idea of kind of a larger, more mythic self.

[Pete Holmes]

It's a symbol.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. A symbol and a mask. A mask Persona.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes. And this is what you. The lens through which you made this album.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. I mean, well, it's the lens with which through. I made all the packaging materials for the album.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay, okay. Which is a thing.

[Maya Hawke]

Which is a thing. Which is a thing. And, like, the album itself. No, but I do think that the album itself is, like, strung together as a. A journey of sorts and. Or that's what I tried to. I tried to have it be a journey towards fulfillment.

[Pete Holmes]

It feels that way. Well, it ends with the I'm in love with my life song, which was very. The whole thing is so beautiful.

[Maya Hawke]

Thank you.

[Pete Holmes]

And you have your own style, which I really appreciate. That's not code for, like, it's bad. I don't know. Yeah. I feel like people say you have your own style. I wanted to say that before I told you how beautiful it is and how talented you are. And, like, three songs in, I was like, oh, you have a way. Like, you have your way of doing it.

[Maya Hawke]

Thank you.

[Pete Holmes]

It's not a song we could have given to this person or this person. You kind of do these, like, almost, like, run on sentences. There's a lot of words. There's certain things you do vocally that I haven't heard people do that I really like that are, like, unique to you. Like, this is your fourth album.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

So it's not a surprise, but it's nice to go like, oh, this person's really finding their.

[Maya Hawke]

Their own voice.

[Pete Holmes]

Their own voice.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And it was one those of wonderful. And I told Christian I was. I cried so much. I cried at. I tried to remember some lines. So I think that's what I like when people give me specifics.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, me too. Me too. I like that. What made you cry?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, exactly. You touched me where time cannot. Yeah, I was just lost it on that.

[Maya Hawke]

Thank you.

[Pete Holmes]

And isn't there. I'm gonna get this one wrong. But there's nothing you need that you don't have. Right. Now. Yeah, yeah. Pretty Bob Thurman right there.

[Maya Hawke]

Pretty Bob Thurman.

[Pete Holmes]

Pbt.

[Maya Hawke]

Well. And Maitreya is the second coming of Buddha. Buddha.

[Pete Holmes]

That's what's. What the name means.

[Maya Hawke]

That's what the name means.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, I mean, to put it in Christian terms.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah. The second coming of Buddha. But Buddha never said, I'm coming back.

[Maya Hawke]

No, no, no, no. It would be a different person. It's the next Buddha.

[Pete Holmes]

I see.

[Maya Hawke]

But it. So. But that doesn't really have anything to do with the record at all. Like. But. But there's. I mean, but I'm influenced by all of that stuff from my grandfather. There's Buddhist stuff and some idea, and I do see the record as, like, a journey of. I was, like, pretty unhappy and, like, a person, like, plagued by wanting things and kind of on this intense pendulum swing of, like, okay, I know everything I want. I'm gonna run towards it. Run towards it. Get a lot of it. Oh, boy. It's too much. Oh, it's too much. I'm gonna drop stuff. I'm gonna go back, start over. Okay. And, like, this sort of intense pendulum, and I wanted to figure out a way to, like, just do things a little bit.

[Pete Holmes]

Leave me alone. Yeah, to that.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, totally.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. I have some. Love me, Leave me alone.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, I got some. Love me, Leave me alone. It's big.

[Pete Holmes]

And where. Where did it start, that desire to express? Am I interrupting?

[Maya Hawke]

No.

[Pete Holmes]

Finish what you're saying.

[Maya Hawke]

I don't. I have no idea.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Maya Hawke]

I was just.

[Pete Holmes]

It's interesting. You're talking about, like, this insatiable, like, knowing where you were headed.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

When did that show up? Because as a father, that's very interesting to me, too. I'm like, when. What age are you? Like, oh, these are my things. This is what I'm gonna chase.

[Maya Hawke]

Well, it's hard to tell, you know, what is the person's individual themness and what is what was encouraged and fostered within them.

[Pete Holmes]

Right. I do feel like Ethan Hawke was probably walking in and handing you ukuleles a lot.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Is that fair?

[Maya Hawke]

That's fair.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, I feel like it must have been an artistic household. That's what we do.

[Maya Hawke]

It was.

[Pete Holmes]

My daughter took out a banjo two nights ago and just started around with the banjo, and I was really happy.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. It was an artistic household, but. And I think not being able to read was a big deal because you're, like, looking for stuff that you can do where you, like, can feel confident because you're not measuring up the way Kids are being measured at that moment in time.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

So there's podcast feelings. I think there's some. You know, there's some like, okay, well, what am I gonna do? Do to impress you, teacher? Like, no, I didn't do the reading, but would you like to see my poem? Like, and then, like, they do want to see your poem, because it's not. Not 1982, it's 2002. And they're like, sure. And. And then you're like, okay, cool. Like, well, that felt good. And. And I think a lot of how I was shaped was, like, kind of through that. Like, I. I wanted to be a lot of other stuff, too. Like, I wanted to be a poetry teacher or, like, a poetry professor. Like, I wanted. There was a lot of other. Really a teacher, but I was really not a very effective student. And it became very clear to me around college application time that all my friends, who I. Some of them, I thought were kind of dumber than me, were all, like, getting great test scores on this stupid test, and I was getting really bad test scores.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And I was like, all right, I think it's trade school. Like, I think, like, I think I'm just gonna commit to this. Like, maybe someday someone will give me an honorary degree if I do a really good job. Like, that was sort of my.

[Pete Holmes]

The honorary. The best shot you have is an honorary degree is becoming a legend.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

So a school that wants to be associated with you for marketing reasons will give you a degree.

[Maya Hawke]

That was my dream.

[Pete Holmes]

Wow.

[Maya Hawke]

That was my plan.

[Pete Holmes]

I just. I'm so happy that you found other things, because I. I can relate to going, like, how am I gonna fit in with all of them?

[Maya Hawke]

What am I gonna do here?

[Pete Holmes]

Can't do it.

[Maya Hawke]

I can't do it. And I. I. And, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Do you have any, like, that?

[Maya Hawke]

I was just.

[Pete Holmes]

Because you tell me why.

[Maya Hawke]

This is the place that I feel the most myself. Acting in performance spaces with other creative people. This is the place I feel my most myself. I feel confident and capable and strong here.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

I feel like a good leader here.

[Pete Holmes]

I feel like it's like some. I think, sometimes very sensitive. I'm not talking about you. I'm a very sensitive person. And when I do stand up, I just get, like, this. This blood transfusion, and it's very exciting. It's very enticing to be like, oh, this is what it feels like to be completely comfortable in your skin.

[Maya Hawke]

And this is what it feels like to have good instincts about something.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, oh, I just had an idea and I said it out loud. And then someone else tried it and it worked.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Whoa. That certainly doesn't happen to me in chem.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, you know, like that.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, for sure.

[Maya Hawke]

And so I think kind of being led by. I. I think whether or not this is a good thing, I think I've always been led by my strengths and then tried to fill in that my weak places that were net that would be supportive to that strength. Like it. But I've always been. I have always been led by my strengths.

[Pete Holmes]

I love that. I love anybody figuring out where they feel at home. Well, we'll jump back into your story and acting and when that started. What was up with the Pope? Because that's one that Christian Hudson told me to ask you about.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, yeah. Well, we had this fight at the Pope because. So, okay. Christian's been making fun of me a lot lately because New York, I think is growing up in New York, I think, is not growing up in America. And I think I didn't know this for a long time.

[Pete Holmes]

So you were in the city or.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes, I was in the city. Like, going back and forth between the city and upstate. But I think that I didn't know this and. Because I think. I thought what New Yorkers think is that New York is a little piece of everywhere. And that if you grew up in New York, you know about the whole world.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, that's right.

[Maya Hawke]

Because New York has a little bit of the whole world.

[Pete Holmes]

You actually don't know any.

[Maya Hawke]

You certainly don't know about America.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's almost like being from a small town or. Small town or from the most exciting country. Small country.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes. It's like you're from Tokyo.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes. It's like a port country.

[Pete Holmes]

A what?

[Maya Hawke]

A port country.

[Pete Holmes]

You said a port. Like a port country. There are people that are. There's a type of shelter that New

[Maya Hawke]

York has, which is the kind of shelter that's not like, yeah, well, I've never been outside of my house. It's a kind where you think you know everything. Everything, but you actually know almost nothing about how the world. And Christian's been joking about it being like, what if you're reverse Harry Potter? Like, you grew up in the magical world and, like, your parents are the Weasleys, but, like, they gave birth to a kid that's like. Doesn't have any magic. And they're like, you got a letter. It's from P.S. 14.

[Pete Holmes]

That's a fair. Fantastic idea.

[Maya Hawke]

Right?

[Pete Holmes]

Wow. The whole movie is you're like, reverse Harry.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

PS4. For people who don't know, the schools in New York are called public school and a number. So it's like just a way of saying the most ordinary place. You've been selected to be a Muggle.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

You're just going to go learn algebra.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. And then they have to go and be like, so, okay, wait, what's this? And it's like a pencil. And they're like. They, like, sharpen it. And they're like, okay.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. What a bummer, though.

[Maya Hawke]

Sometimes on Christian and I's trips around the country, I feel like I'm learning about my shelteredness. Like, he'll be like, have you ever been to Buc EE's? And I'll be like, what's Bucky's?

[Pete Holmes]

What is Buc EE's?

[Maya Hawke]

It's a truck stop. But it's like all like, I love that you're.

[Pete Holmes]

See, even Chris Christian's experience of regular America might not be everyone else's.

[Maya Hawke]

No, no, no. It's universal. It's like a real truckers stop for, like, tour musicians.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, it's like, it's a real thing.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. And. And. Or it'll be like, you haven't been to, like, you've never been to In N Out Burger. Or, you know, And I'll be like, yeah. And they're like, you're so uncultured. And I'll be like, well, I bought a chameleon in Morocco. Like, like, that's.

[Pete Holmes]

You were not sheltered. You were just in a very specific lane.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Not eating a truck stop.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Per se.

[Maya Hawke]

Per se. Yeah, per se. But it was. But it's an interesting, like, thing learning about New York. But anyway, we were talking about the Pope, and for some reason, I think New York Yorkers love the Pope. Because New Yorkers don't know about fundamentalist Christians. Really. They know about them hypothetically, but they don't, like, experience them.

[Pete Holmes]

That's right.

[Maya Hawke]

Because it's all. For the most part. And again, I could be totally wrong about everything I'm saying, but, like, for the most part, it's like Catholics, Protestants and Episcopalians in terms of, like, the Christian sects that are really around. Yeah. And like, kind of the most liberal versions of those things.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Maya Hawke]

And so. So. And it seems so ceremonial and dramatic and like, I was a kid in the time of Pope Francis with him being like, I don't know, God could be whatever God is, you know, and we were all like, whoa, the Pope.

[Podcast Announcer]

You've probably seen me all over the Internet talking about Magic Mind because I'm absolutely obsessed and I drink it every single day and before every single episode of this podcast. Magic Mind is a functional blend of magical ingredients that help you feel dialed in, focused and energized and I absolutely love it. They also have something that you might not know about though, which is called Magic Mind Sleep. I just updated my Magic Mind subscription to ship me a 30 day supply of magic mind every month and a 30 day supply of magic Mind Sleep because it helps me so much. It helps me fall asleep faster, stay asleep longer and wake up feeling refreshed. And the ingredients are incredible. L Theanine. I used to just take L Theanine supplements. Kava. I used to take a kava supplement 5 HTP.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Podcast Announcer]

I used to take supplements for all of these. I had all these pills on my countertop to fall asleep and now they're all in one place. Ashwagandha, lemon balm, lavender magnesium glycinate, which is the right magnesium for sleep. Valerian. It is Gaba. I mean, go get Magic Mind in your life to dial in and focus and also now to fall asleep at night. Right now, Magic Mind is hooking up weirdos with 20% off your first order. Get the original Magic Mind or maybe the free or maybe the max, depending on how much caffeine you like in your life. And get Magic Mind Sleep. Just go to magicmind.com weird and use promo code weird at checkout. This episode is sponsored by Quince. The older I get, the less interested I am in wearing stiff, complicated clothes. I just want clothes that breathe, feel good and still make me look like I tried tried at least a little bit.

[Pete Holmes]

I want a bit little look good

[Podcast Announcer]

and that's why I genuinely love Quint. Their stuff somehow feels elevated and super comfortable at the same time. And now that it's summer, especially here in California, I've been loving their linen shirts, especially in the heat and they look relaxed and cool without trying too hard. And Val for the nights, because it's a desert out here at night, it's actually quite cool. She picked out some of their lightweight sweaters that I have been wearing non stop as well.

[Pete Holmes]

And she is over the moon.

[Podcast Announcer]

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What can I say?

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[Maya Hawke]

You don't have any siblings, right?

[Pete Holmes]

I have one brother.

[Maya Hawke]

You have one brother? Older or younger?

[Pete Holmes]

He's older.

[Maya Hawke]

I really, I have a younger brother and I feel like I really learned about safe fighting from my brother.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, you did a lot of safe fights.

[Maya Hawke]

We did a lot of safe. I mean they weren't always safe, but the relationship was so safe.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

That they're safe.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, that's where family can go. You can go past a line that I think friends can't go.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

Because you have to be you'll still be family.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. You'll still be family. But, like, they're. They. They are safe with my brother. Usually. I mean, like, sometimes they end with, like, I just can't blow. I got it. Like, but, like. But they're always safe, even if they're like, Are you freaking crazy?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, the biggest fight we got in was about. He said that if. If cloning got really good and I died and they could clone me, he would want that to happen. And. And he.

[Pete Holmes]

You don't want this.

[Maya Hawke]

That's not me.

[Pete Holmes]

I agree.

[Maya Hawke]

There's. I'm sorry. No. Like, that. That. I. And. And this is my problem. Every fight I get into, my brother, you're.

[Pete Holmes]

Then you're in the kitchen cutting vegetables, and you're crying black blood.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

That. We know where this movie goes.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, at the beginning, it really seems like you.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

But then you freeze while you're cutting. Cele blood comes out of your eye, and then you're like, oh, heavens.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes. And the problem is I lose every fight with my brother because eventually I reveal that my argument actually has to do with my belief in the soul. And then he's kind of a nothing person sometimes. And he'll be like. He'll be like, well, then that's not an argument. That's like. And I'll be like, my. Ah.

[Pete Holmes]

Your argument doesn't count.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, your argument doesn't count because it has to do with me being like, but there's some essential means that is in me that would not be in that clone even if you gave it all my memories. And he's like, what essential you, Ness.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

And I'm like, what do I say? That's not the soul. What do I say? That's not the soul. Because, I mean, the soul. I had the best. This is a good friendly fight I had about. It started off with the question, if a tree falls in the forest and no one. And no one hears it, doesn't make a sound.

[Pete Holmes]

I always wanted to be like, are there insects on the tree?

[Maya Hawke]

This is what we talked about. But do squirrels count? Squirrels have ears, and they can hear a tree fall.

[Pete Holmes]

I think the original koan is assuming nothing conscious is there.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. But then it's like, okay, like. And we. But trees actually themselves are semi conscious.

[Pete Holmes]

But. Right. But they don't have an experience that you can report. It's like, to be them. I don't think there's an.

[Maya Hawke]

There's an intelligence, but they are communicating with each other.

[Pete Holmes]

Sure.

[Maya Hawke]

And we know as little about what they're communicating as we know about what dolphins are communicating. I mean, we assume dolphins are communicating, like, faster fish over there, but, like.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah. It could be trees.

[Maya Hawke]

Could be, like, lean left.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, they do because of the light.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, I know.

[Pete Holmes]

I know. You know?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Nobody thinks you didn't know.

[Maya Hawke]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

I just wanted the audience to know.

[Maya Hawke]

Sorry.

[Pete Holmes]

Will you see it in the. No, I didn't feel threatened. I just want. With respect, I want you to know that a young lady raised in Woodstock, New York, would lean towards the light. But I. I'm so with you. Like, I'm ready to concede that a tree might have. Certainly has more going on than we know. Well, that's a line in your song. Was that. Is that song about your dad, or did I completely get it wrong?

[Maya Hawke]

Which one?

[Pete Holmes]

The one about saying hello, talking to trees. That's the only clue I'll give you. It's called different.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, you taught me to talk to trees. And that spit will get the bloodstains out of your sheets.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

No, it's not.

[Pete Holmes]

It's not.

[Maya Hawke]

No, but it's. But close.

[Pete Holmes]

Really? It's about Bob Thurman. No, you don't have to say who it's about. I'll say.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. Tell me what you. What it felt like to you.

[Pete Holmes]

I was crying, the whole song.

[Maya Hawke]

Thank you.

[Pete Holmes]

I really wanted to share that with you. I thought it was beautiful. But whether. I don't. I guess it doesn't matter if it was about your dad, but I was, like, thinking about, like, your dad. No, I was thinking about being a dad. Oh.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And I was like, my daughter is so her own person. So the course is. I always wanted.

[Maya Hawke]

I wanted to grow up to be just like you. It never was an option, though.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

You say you see yourself in me sometimes. Great minds think different.

[Pete Holmes]

Right. You can see how I thought that was about.

[Maya Hawke]

Totally.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. I'm not dumb, am I?

[Maya Hawke]

No, no, no. It's actually. It's like, from a different person's point of view about their parent.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, interesting.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

It's super fun.

[Maya Hawke]

But, like. So it makes perfect sense.

[Pete Holmes]

Right, of course. Well, for what it's worth. For what it's worth. I'm just saying I think it's an amazing song.

[Maya Hawke]

I really appreciate it.

[Pete Holmes]

I really.

[Maya Hawke]

I mean, obviously, every time you write a song about a different person.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

From their point of view. Do. It's because something in their point of view speaks to your own point of view and what you feel. And what I was exploring in that song is the idea of wanting to understand difference like. Like, and trying to carve out your own. You identity and your own memories and who you are separate, like, in the slow separation from family. Shrink said something cool where she talked about, like, separation from your parents as a spiral.

[Pete Holmes]

You are from New York. My analyst.

[Maya Hawke]

My shrink said something cool. She talked about how separation from your parents is like a spiral, not a line. So you keep revisiting the same trauma points, but you're always a little further away from them every time you come around, versus just getting further and. No, in a positive way.

[Pete Holmes]

No, I. I'm saying I'm sorry. Cause it's amazing.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm like, I'm sorry. I didn't expect to have my mind blown.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

But you're absolutely right. You're still feeling.

[Maya Hawke]

You're feeling it just a little less. It's like the first time, it's a poke, like, to the liver, and then it's like, just like a little poke

[Pete Holmes]

to the rib cage, and then it's like, really good.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

That's what I say to my. I'll share this. Every time it comes up, I say to my parts, like, my inner children and all these different protectors. The whole staff. Yeah, I'll get the whole staff and of your heart. Of everybody.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, I. I have a whole staff.

[Pete Holmes]

The whole. Names for them, of course.

[Maya Hawke]

Can I hear some?

[Pete Holmes]

Well, they don't. They're really not names. They're like the orphan.

[Maya Hawke]

Cool.

[Pete Holmes]

They're all Pete.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, no, no, that's what I mean by name. I mean, like, I have the princess.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, okay. I think Henry.

[Maya Hawke]

No, no, no. I have the princess and the child.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And like. Yeah. And the painter.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Okay.

[Maya Hawke]

And there's like. I have different names for all the different guys.

[Pete Holmes]

It would take me down a long road to think of them all, but

[Maya Hawke]

I love the orphan. The orphan makes sense.

[Pete Holmes]

There's the addict.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

There's. There's all these different guys. And then there's the king. I don't know if. If you've had a higher power. Like. Like, best self is my king. He incorporates all the parts.

[Maya Hawke]

My princess is definitely not my best self.

[Pete Holmes]

I wouldn't think that the princess was. I'm waiting for the queen.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Podcast Announcer]

If.

[Pete Holmes]

If.

[Maya Hawke]

No, there's. Well, that's like the dragon I would call. My king would be my call. The dragon.

[Pete Holmes]

That sounds pretty aggressive, though.

[Maya Hawke]

No, dragon's beautiful.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. I don't know what kind of dragon I'm picturing Smaug. But what I say to my parts is, I'm always like, I'm not. I talk like a politician, but, like, I like to say like a king. Like, I'm not saying we're not going to be hurt in the future. I'm saying his expression is, the lights are still on. Like, we're. We're okay. Yeah, it is going to hurt. It's like what you would want a benevolent leader to say. Like, it's still. We might get frustrated, we might get hurt, we might get sad.

[Maya Hawke]

Things could get worse from here.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm just saying we can deal with. With it.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And. And the team loves it. Yeah, the team loves that.

[Maya Hawke]

My team loves it, too.

[Pete Holmes]

So you're on a spiral and you're like, oh, here it is again. Yes. But look, that's what the lights are still on means. It's like, we're okay.

[Maya Hawke]

We're okay.

[Pete Holmes]

We felt it, and we're okay. And then the next time, it'll be even a little bit more okay. We're having the same conversation.

[Maya Hawke]

Exactly. It's the same conversation. And it's like the different. Because all the different guys have different ways of protecting you, I think. And they're all like, were super useful usually when you actually had no ability to protect yourself.

[Pete Holmes]

That's right. You have to tell them, and you

[Maya Hawke]

tell them that actually, you know, the king and the dragon have entered the building.

[Pete Holmes]

That's right.

[Maya Hawke]

And we're strong now, and we don't need your weird little tricky.

[Pete Holmes]

I know.

[Maya Hawke]

You needed the tricky ship before. Thank you.

[Pete Holmes]

You don't have to pretend to read anymore. I'm not even trying to be funny.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

It's like, you don't have to trick your way out of this.

[Maya Hawke]

No.

[Pete Holmes]

You can just be on a podcast and say, I couldn't read for a while.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. And that's okay.

[Pete Holmes]

I can now.

[Maya Hawke]

I can now. And it's okay.

[Pete Holmes]

I never learned to read. It's from Wayne's World 2. I wouldn't expect you to get no Wayne's World.

[Maya Hawke]

Maybe, But Wayne's World 2 feels a little far.

[Pete Holmes]

I'll go to Wayne's World.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Wayne's World 2 is a bit much.

[Maya Hawke]

Bridge over travel water.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm glad you found that type of therapy. It took me a while to do parts work or internal family system again.

[Maya Hawke]

This is lucky New York. Shit.

[Pete Holmes]

Lucky New York.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, not only did I go to therapy, everyone I knew did. So it wasn't even weird, right? I. It wasn't even like when I said to Kids at school. I go to therapy. What do you have to do after school today? Therapy. They wouldn't be like, oh, what are you, a freak?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, what are you. Like, they'd be like. They'd be like, oh, cool. Mine's on Tuesday at lunch.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, over Zoom.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And you're like, oh, zoom.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

My parents still. And it's just a generational thing, won't acknowledge that I go to therapy. Maybe my mom will, but it's kind of like a blank show.

[Maya Hawke]

Is. Are your. Are your parents like, your parents in Crash Pushing?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Cool.

[Pete Holmes]

They signed. In fact, that was one of the more loving things. Is they Loving moments. Is they signed. I guess it was an NDA or not. Maybe not an NDA was like a we won't sue you. Because I wanted. We wanted to use things that they actually said and things that actually happened.

[Maya Hawke]

And you were. You were worried they didn't know I might sue you. Oh, okay.

[Pete Holmes]

They were being very.

[Maya Hawke]

Okay, okay.

[Pete Holmes]

But it ended up being this really, really sweet. I still remember Brit because I felt nervous. I was like, I'm not gonna say anything bad about you.

[Maya Hawke]

My literal pants. If I had to bring my parents.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

A piece of paper.

[Pete Holmes]

But imagine if they signed it and said, as long as it's funny. That's what my dad said. And I was like, wow, that's tricky.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I mean, tricky for me. The. The line blurs. I. I'll tell stories. I'm very careful about what I talk about with my daughter, but I'm like, my life is. I have to do this with other people's families and other people's kids and other people's privacy. I want to tell these stories. I have to run it by them first. But, like, I don't want Leela to be upset with me later.

[Maya Hawke]

Someday she will be about something, but it won't really necessarily be about that thing. It will be about her figuring out, sharing her individuation, her sharing who she is, what's important to her, what her moral compass of sharing is.

[Pete Holmes]

And it reminds me, I don't think he'd mind me sharing. When we were starting out, Kumail met Zach Galifianakis for some reason, and they ended up having a really long conversation. He was like, I think I'm friends with Zach Galifianakis. This is when we were in our 20s.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And then the Rolling Stone interview with Zach Galifianakis came out, and it was all the things he had told Kumail, meaning that he had Those were, like, the things. It's like when you meet Lena Dunham, I think she's very public about this. You'll talk to her for 15 minutes, and you'll be. Be like, I. I think we have a soul connection. She just told me about a time that she. Some amazing personal thing, and then you read an interview or a book or a podcast, and you're like, oh, no, these faucets are just on.

[Maya Hawke]

Well, I think that's often what performers are kind of like. Like, I remember figuring this out through dating of like, I dated a. I went on a couple first dates with people who then were like, I've never had a connection with anyone like this before.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh. And they just didn't know what a performer was like.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. And I was like, oh, I did two hours ago. Like, I could have a connection. Like, a connection.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, I said all this to the bus driver.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, real.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. And. And, like.

[Pete Holmes]

But it's. I. I sorry.

[Maya Hawke]

I got accused of love bombing a lot because I would be like, no, no, no, no, no. Not love bombing. This is what I served. This is the ice cream I served everyone who comes to the store.

[Pete Holmes]

That's right. This is all I got.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

We're like salt and straw. We only have weird flavors.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Good. Good, though.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, really good.

[Pete Holmes]

Very good. Very good flavors.

[Maya Hawke]

Yum.

[Pete Holmes]

Good vegan. Katie, go to salt and straw. There are sponsors use promo code weird in line.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, cool.

[Pete Holmes]

For a strange look from the person making your ice cream.

[Maya Hawke]

Well, we looped that in so. Well, talking about ice cream.

[Pete Holmes]

It's no big deal.

[Maya Hawke]

Wow.

[Pete Holmes]

It's no big deal.

[Maya Hawke]

Incredible.

[Pete Holmes]

I forget who it was. On this podcast, somebody said, like, people are like, if you could have lunch with anybody, who would it be? And sometimes people say Steve Jobs, and they're like, you realize all Steve Jobs was doing, Doing with full respect, was testing, like, would this work? Is that interesting? Would you want a phone that's a ipod? Like, like, yeah. Everything was just another opportunity to get data. I'm not. I can't know that about Steve Jobs, but performers. I'm that way. We were hanging out at dinner last night. Me, my wife, our kids, and a couple other parents that are friends of ours. And I. I said something dumb. I'm not even gonna say. And then afterwards, I said to Valerie, I was like, I'm sorry. I realized I was just trying a premise. Like, I was doing a premise. And that's okay if you know the deal. Meaning, like, I'm not trying to be funny. It's like, I'm a stripper. Like, that's what I do. I'm like, kind of seeing, is this sexy?

[Maya Hawke]

Does this work?

[Pete Holmes]

Does this work? And I'm at a dinner thing and I said, like, it wasn't like nobody was like, heavens. But I was like, oh, other people aren't trying material on their kids that might work in a movie, but that's kind of what strippers do. Going back to strippers. Yeah. Does that make sense?

[Maya Hawke]

Totally. Yeah, I know.

[Pete Holmes]

Because forgive, forgive and then forget. But I feel like actresses get more of a bad rap for what you just said. Like, they're like, really needy, whatever. And you don't. It's underreported. I'm with you. How aggressively needy male actors are.

[Maya Hawke]

Male actors are the neediest people in the world. I have a fabulous.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't know why I even gendered it. But you know what?

[Maya Hawke]

I have a whole theory about how the re. Like, what's wrong with male actors is that they. Especially of the generation older than me, like your generation, my dad's generation, which I know are different, but like, those two are like, they. Acting isn't a very masculine job. And you had dads who like, wanted you to be masculine. And so wanting to go into being an actor, you, like, have to make it more masculine, which is why you have to do a bunch of push ups before you go up. And why you have to be method and has to. You have to be a jerk to everybody. Everybody. Because it actually shows how intensely vulnerable you are because you're deeply uncomfortable with the femininity of your job. That you wake up in the morning and somebody picks out your outfit. Princess. They pull up your socks.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And then someone applies a light coat of foundation to your nose and a little rouge to your mouth.

[Pete Holmes]

And then you want to see your shot because, like, how am I being framed?

[Maya Hawke]

How am I looking? And like.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And like. And it's a kind of a feminine job, you know, and whatever that word means. And. And I think they hit it. And I. So I. I think that's where it gets.

[Pete Holmes]

So they overcompensate.

[Maya Hawke]

And I had a. A hairstylist once said to me, you know me, Maya was talking about dating some actor, and the hairstylist was like, you know, Maya, I've always said an actress is a little bit more than a woman, but an actor is a little bit less than a man.

[Pete Holmes]

That is brutal. Yeah, I think it might be true.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

So you ended up marrying a musician, which I fully support that you didn't same stream it.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And your parents split up. I mean, I'm not looking for dish here. It seems like maybe. Maybe act like comedians and comedians don't tend to vibe.

[Maya Hawke]

It's hard.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, it's hard.

[Maya Hawke]

It's hard.

[Pete Holmes]

We don't need to go into their stuff.

[Maya Hawke]

No.

[Pete Holmes]

I think it is interesting that you found a musician.

[Podcast Announcer]

Close enough.

[Pete Holmes]

Performer. Sensitive. Sensitive, funny, but not the same damage.

[Maya Hawke]

It's really hard not to be competitive.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

It. It's like, it's. And it's. And it's wonderful that, like, Christian's amazing in the arts and, like, amazing at helping read scripts and amazing. And like, I love music. Obviously, I'm here promoting my record and, like, so we share all these things, but when it comes down to it, we have two different paths and two different roads we're walking professionally. And I think that's very.

[Pete Holmes]

But you tour together right now?

[Maya Hawke]

We are, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

It's so cool. Yeah, it's so great. And he's on the record, right?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, he wrote. We co. Wrote basically every song.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. I just thought I heard almost every.

[Maya Hawke]

And he's. And he's singing there too. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

It's. It's really great. You should.

[Maya Hawke]

Thank you so much. I am.

[Pete Holmes]

It's really, really good. I listened to the whole thing this morning and I loved it.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, thank you. I really.

[Pete Holmes]

I kept turning it up. I was already loud.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Then I would turn it up and I found it very emotional.

[Maya Hawke]

I really appreciate it. I really wanted to make. I wanted to make a record about ambition. And then I ended up really making a record about love. And that's. And I think it's because it's like, the record starts with the love of my life, which is about wanting. And it ends with, like, I am in love with my life, which is about, like, being grateful for what you have.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And I.

[Pete Holmes]

Have you been in the pub? You think what.

[Maya Hawke]

That. That the last. That there's a journey of, like, figuring out your. Where to place your ambition and where to place your romance and your desire and your love. And that falling in, like, really in love with someone that's my friend really helped me make a lot of the things that were causing me a lot of stress a little bit smaller.

[Pete Holmes]

I mean, that's where I was going. We're kind of back where we started, which is like, your relationships and your friendships and it's a leading question, but have you been in show business enough to kind of realize there's nothing behind that door? I don't mean nothing. It's fun to go Nothing behind which Door party, and it's fun to be on a hit show. All of that is fun. We're not. We're the aliens living the life. What a trip. What a gift. What a privilege. But there isn't a lot of substance there. That's my experience.

[Maya Hawke]

No, I mean, I feel like a lot of what's behind that door is a mortgage, which I don't know if anyone. You know, most people who are my age don't get to have a mortgage.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

And I do, and I got. And it's behind that door.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

But. But a lot of. Most of what's behind that door is. Oh, my God. Really?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah. You mean fake shallow. Yeah, fake shallow.

[Maya Hawke]

Fake shallow.

[Pete Holmes]

That's what I mean. So I think. I don't know. I feel. Who cares? I was gonna put myself in the same generation as your dad, but I think he's older than me.

[Maya Hawke]

I think you're. You're. You're. You're a bit. Little millennial.

[Pete Holmes]

I am a Gen X.

[Maya Hawke]

You're so. Okay, then you are in the same generation.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, but he's in. He's maybe an older Gen X, and you're a baby Gen X. Yeah, Yeah,

[Pete Holmes]

I think that's what it is.

[Maya Hawke]

But I would have thought you were an older millennial is what I would have pegged you at.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, people say. I just feel like a lot of our. Whatever, Gen X, who cares? A lot of people, regardless of their generation, go to the hardware store for milk. I'm sure you've heard that. So it's like, we go to show business to, like, like, fix us, to fill the hole and love us. And when you go, there's a mortgage and. And, like, being in a show, like, being on this was my talk show, but being on Crashing means I can tour the kind of the rest of my life, let's hope. But, like, I can find an audience. That's this incredible gift that came back to my craft. So the craft led to this, then it. Then it enforced it, reinforced it. That's amazing. But I do think I would go, like Christian saying to you, when's it going to be enough? I. I'm. I'm being honest. We're talking about my ambition here. I have to separate myself from it. If I went to, like, the Emmy party and everybody stopped and, like, cheered when I. And looked at me, I think I would enjoy it and be like, this is deserved and it's not enough. Like, it's it's never any, it's never enough.

[Maya Hawke]

It's, It's a carrot on a treadmill.

[Pete Holmes]

It's fucking a carrot on a trip treadmill. And then to bring this back to you, Valerie, Leela, leaving la, living in a place like Woodstock, where I know people, where I see people at the coffee shop, all this stuff. I, 47, just started going like, oh, this is where the substance is. I still love, love what I do, but I'm not looking for it to, like, mommy or whatever. I don't know what I wanted to. Yeah. To fill the hole.

[Maya Hawke]

I once did a lot of mushrooms, and it became very clear to me that I had, like, a hole. And, like, that was what my trip was about. And it, like, wasn't exactly a bad trip, but it wasn't a good trip. It was like a medium, Medium self. Medium therapy trip.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And I was like, oh, I have a hole.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And I'm like, the hole is, like, leaking stuff out. And that's why I talk so much. That's why I want to tell the interviewer that it's a personal thing.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

That's why I want to do it, because it's just leaking from this hole. Maybe while I'm trying to shoot. Shove things in the hole.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like job opportunities and people who think I'm cool and like, oh, my God. So, and so DM me. That must mean that I've made it like, you know, these little victories that you shove in the hole while you keep your hand on it, you know, while it's, you know, and it's, that's not how you fill the hole.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

You fill the hole with community, with sturdy relationships and like, like, and whatever you find and, like, hobbies, like things you love.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And nurturing yourself and is how you work on. And you'll never fill the hole, but you can work on living with the hole.

[Pete Holmes]

Right, Right.

[Maya Hawke]

Because I think we all have, like, kind of have the have.

[Pete Holmes]

That's what the King says is like, I'm not saying the hole is going to go away.

[Maya Hawke]

It's not going to go away, but

[Pete Holmes]

we can lean into what's very useful about it. Like, on one hand, talk about that gratitude again. It's like, oh, thank God I have this drive, this hole that's, that's making me need to do this stuff because I think, think I know some people. There was a musician I know. I, I, I don't really know him, but, but he didn't seem to have a hole. He was incredibly talented. Did some Stuff got some breaks, but, like, wasn't itchy in any way, and that's fine. But it, It.

[Maya Hawke]

It's hard to, quote, unquote, make it if you're not itchy.

[Pete Holmes]

That's what you kind of want to be Marilyn Monroe to a certain extent where you're, like, kind of crazy for making it.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. If.

[Pete Holmes]

If that's what you want. And I think you kind of could have not enough itch.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. You can have not. Not. But not. Not enough. You're probably an amazing person.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, you're not. Not enough for anything. Just maybe not enough to, like, continue to face plant in the mud at, like, Emmy parties.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, you, like, just like there's a. You have to have a lot of itch for that.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. So it's okay. This is wonderful. I'm just happy to see how balanced and. And how many things you figured out. It's like, let's not go to the Netflix Emmy party. To be fulfilled in a deep way that. That's reserved for your family or for your friends. Yeah. Or for sunlight.

[Maya Hawke]

Let's not ask it.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

To this way.

[Pete Holmes]

And you know what?

[Maya Hawke]

And then we have fun.

[Pete Holmes]

It never said it was.

[Maya Hawke]

It never said it was going to. We did.

[Pete Holmes]

We did.

[Maya Hawke]

And it actually can be fun if I don't ask it to fix this problem.

[Pete Holmes]

That's right. If you just enjoy it.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. But I do think it's tempting for a lot of sensitive souls to be like this. This is. This is that affirmation.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. We all, like most people in this industry have been trying to be in this industry since they were little kids and, or like, like young. And we all have gotten invited to a party that we didn't really belong at when we were young and felt like nobody. And I think there's also a continuing circle of, like, trying to repair that. Like, okay, this one time I went to the part I remember. I mean, yeah, I remember it was. This is like, poor little, poor little rich girl. Boohoo hoo. But the first time I went to a Hollywood party without my parents, I left and was like, whoa, I'm invisible.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, wow. Yeah. Like, I appreciate the vulnerability there. That's honest. I didn't know that has to be.

[Maya Hawke]

I, like, I. I didn't know what it felt like not to be them at a party.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

And. And then I was like, whoa, where do I sit? No one's talking to me.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, oh, my God, no one's talking to me.

[Pete Holmes]

Wow.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, and I, I was Like, I've got to fix this problem immediately. Like. Like, this is insane. I have got. I was like, whoa.

[Pete Holmes]

So would you say that was you falling into the trap a little bit or. Or no?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, yeah, it was. That was like a moment of like, I. I love acting. And like, I was like, drama school. I was serious. I was like, very serious. And, like, in many ways had learned from my parents to have kind of like a bad taste in my mouth about fame and celebrity. And I was like, I don't want this. That seems like the bad part of this career. Maybe I'll be a drama teacher. Maybe I'll do all plays. And probably that was a moment where I was like, nope, not doing all plays. Got to fix this problem, right? Like, yeah, I, like, Nat Wolf needs to know me by name. You know what I mean?

[Pete Holmes]

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[Maya Hawke]

I can't stop scratching my downtown.

[Pete Holmes]

Mm, yeah, but I'm not itching to go downtown and tell a receptionist I'm

[Maya Hawke]

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[Pete Holmes]

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[Pete Holmes]

Do kids love you?

[Maya Hawke]

Kids love me. I mean, on my shows, it's mostly kids, strangers, stranger things, and anxiety.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, I, I've weirdly cornered a market, and I think this is kind of how it happens of, like, a lot of girls that were like, me when I was young. Like, girls who are, like, a little confused about their sexuality, a little weird, like, like, to crochet and make stuff, have big feelings and don't know what to do with them and are like, you know, And I think that that's a lot what I always like, and it's who I see at my shows.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, interesting. What is that part of your story? I didn't know a sexual identity thing.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, like, not a part of my story that I talk about. Yeah, I mean, it's definitely a part of my.

[Pete Holmes]

I just know you're saying people are relating to that.

[Maya Hawke]

They are. I think it's, again, it's, like, weird how art imitates I, I, they are because. Mostly because of his character that I played, not because I've been particularly vulnerable about my own.

[Pete Holmes]

I see.

[Maya Hawke]

Story.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Your character in Stranger Things is a lesbian.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Maya Hawke]

And so I think that it's like, it's the stranger thing. It's like, it's kind of coincident. Accidental. Right. It's like, it's like the Stranger Things nerd culture, like, Comic Con culture, and what that is and looks like. And then, like. But then also the young women who are a part of that and then who are particularly attracted to my character and who, like, feel very seen by her. And then on top of it, I did anxiety, and then I make the music that I make, and I, I am. I'm a pretty private person, but not that private. I'm like, I think I walked the line. And. And probably a lot of it has to do with growing up in the business and trying to, like, fake. So much of my life is public already. There are things that I like to protect and hold for me because I don't want to be a reality TV star. And everyone already knows. My parents and my brother and my grandpa and, like, and so it's like, like, it's, it's close. So it's. It's a hard line to figure out what you hold for yourself.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

But somehow, through the professional decisions that I've made, made, I've wound up with people who care about Me that are a lot like I was when I was a little kid.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, interesting. And Disney, I think, is such a huge thing. And then you become like, a part of their childhood. A part like this zeitgeist. I mean, am I correct?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. I mean, especially getting to play a character like Anxiety that came out during the time of, like, the anxious generation. Yeah, right.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like the kids who went through Covid and.

[Pete Holmes]

Mm. Yeah. I thought that movie did a great job. And you did a great job.

[Maya Hawke]

I love that movie. I'm so proud to have been in it.

[Pete Holmes]

You know, this is gonna sound completely out of nowhere. Why are we mad at booby traps? Christian Lee?

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, booby traps. I set booby traps.

[Pete Holmes]

Wait, you set booby traps for him?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, accidentally. I'm a little bit. It's connected to dyslexia, I think. It's like, I'm not very good at, like, when I go to the kitchen and I want to get a mug, for example.

[Pete Holmes]

A Netflix mug?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, a Netflix mug. I'll go to the kitchen, I'll open my Dr. Drawer, I will get out a mug, and I'll be like, cool. Opening the cabinet was required for what I needed. This is narcissist behavior. Right. I needed mug. I open cabinet. Closing cabinet isn't necess necessary in this story. The cabinet still being opened has no impact on my ability to have tea.

[Pete Holmes]

Right. I'm on to tea.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm done with cabinets. You're still thinking about cabinets.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm already drinking tea.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm already drinking tea.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Maya Hawke]

And so I have a.

[Pete Holmes]

Sounds like me short term.

[Maya Hawke]

Like. Like, I. I mean, I. I. That's. I got rigorously tested, and they didn't come up with that one. But I'm. But, you know, amen clinic. I don't remember.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Maya Hawke]

I think her name was Dr.

[Pete Holmes]

Her. I'm just kidding.

[Maya Hawke]

Imagine her a lady doctor.

[Pete Holmes]

I can't operate on this boy. He's my son.

[Maya Hawke]

It's my favorite joke as a kid. The only one I could remember.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay, so I. I'm similar. I don't have it, but I have symptoms of it or whatever. I'm just. I'm the same way. I like leaving things where they are.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, does your wife walk into the kitchen and go, ow?

[Pete Holmes]

No, she's too small. Okay, but if she was Christian's height. Yes. So this is the booby trap.

[Maya Hawke]

These are the booby traps.

[Pete Holmes]

But, I mean, look, you're here. He's not. I'm. But I. I think I would side with you Anyway. Anyway, he can't see it, so he also.

[Maya Hawke]

He wakes up earlier than me, and in a kind of bleary, sleepy morning state, will, like, walk into our hallway and trip over my shoes.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Maya Hawke]

And then walk down the stairs and slip on a sweater. I put on a sweater. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

A single roller skate.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. And walk past, like. And also, we live in New York City, so there's no space anywhere.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

So it's like, in order to walk from our bed to the kitchen, you have to walk past our bureau. And if the drawers to the bureau are open, then there's no room between the bureau and.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. I side with him.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. So do I.

[Pete Holmes]

So do I. Ascendance, I said to Val recently was, where were the pair of pants that were on the floor in the bathroom or whatever it might be? That kind of sounds like. I mean, in the toilet room, they were, like, folded on the ground. But that's where they are, and that's where I want them.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

No, because I'm gonna wear them tomorrow.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. I'll always be like, Christian, where is my blanket?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Where's my. This? Where's this?

[Pete Holmes]

It's because there's this. There's a system of madness that they can't possibly.

[Maya Hawke]

That they can't possibly understand. And then they move things.

[Pete Holmes]

But it's good. He's a morning person and you're not.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

This is our new theory. Val and I, we go, like, in every couple, there should be one morning person and one not morning person. Especially if you have kids. I think that becomes really helpful.

[Maya Hawke]

Someone does bedtime. Someone does wake up.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Somebody's rocking in the morning. Someone's rocking at night. You don't want two hot shots in the morning.

[Maya Hawke]

No.

[Pete Holmes]

And two deadbeats at night.

[Maya Hawke]

No. One balance. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

One of each. And in the afternoon, everybody's garbage.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, weirdly, afternoon is my golden time.

[Pete Holmes]

You love an afternoon.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm. I'm. I'm an afternoon delight for pretty much everything.

[Pete Holmes]

Really.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. I like. My golden hours are between noon and five.

[Pete Holmes]

Noon and five?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

That's nobody. What do you mean?

[Maya Hawke]

Everybody? That's the most. That's like. That's the day.

[Pete Holmes]

No, the day is 9 to 11. 11.

[Maya Hawke]

Whoa.

[Pete Holmes]

Actually, no. I'm gonna. This podcast. We started 11 on purpose because that's my golden time. One o'.

[Maya Hawke]

Clock.

[Pete Holmes]

The rest of the day's.

[Maya Hawke]

Whoa. Yeah, I'm. I'm really. Noon to 5. Noon to 5 after dinner. Try me. Like, over.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm with that, but what are you eating for Lunch. Real, real question. Not boring question. Because if you're not crashing, makes me think maybe you're eating something good for lunch.

[Maya Hawke]

Not eating lunch.

[Pete Holmes]

No lunch.

[Maya Hawke]

Lunch.

[Pete Holmes]

Prince Philip.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm eating a late breakfast.

[Pete Holmes]

No lunch, no lunch. This is why you're 12 to noon. This is why you're 12 to noon.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm.

[Pete Holmes]

I knew there was a tip.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm eating like a breakfast at 11 o'. Clock.

[Pete Holmes]

This is intermittent.

[Maya Hawke]

And a dinner at 5.

[Pete Holmes]

Dinner at 5.

[Maya Hawke]

Breakfast at 11.

[Pete Holmes]

Breakfast 11. Two meals.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. Some snacks, you know, maybe a smoothie. Midday.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. Maybe like you're done eating at six.

[Maya Hawke]

I mean definitively, not religiously like this. I am not a particularly habitualized person.

[Pete Holmes]

Yep. But in a perfect world, but in

[Maya Hawke]

a perfect world, that's breakfast at 11, done at 6.

[Pete Holmes]

Done at 6.

[Maya Hawke]

Done at 6.

[Pete Holmes]

I've heard done at 6 is very good. They say after 6 everything you eat is 10x. That's what somebody said on. I know.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

It's hard to know what's true.

[Maya Hawke]

It's hard to know what's true. But I feel good done at six. And I'm so happy. I mean I once.

[Pete Holmes]

Do you wear any like trackers or anything? Cuz if I don't, if I don't have dinner, my sleep is twice as good. It's always like, what did you do? And it's like, I just didn't eat a slice of cake.

[Maya Hawke]

I don't wear anything. Mostly because I'm really like, again, this is connected to the cabinets. I'm not a good. I've slowly, as an adult, learn to compensate for my issues by not acquiring things. Yeah, just stop doing like, oh yeah, you're going to cry every time you lose your sunglasses. Don't wear sunglasses. You're done. You're done. Like, that's not what you. You.

[Pete Holmes]

They're not for you.

[Maya Hawke]

They're not for you. You're done.

[Pete Holmes]

Bill Burr had this line where he goes, if I have fake conversations with you in my mind, you're out of my life. And I was like, I think he said on stage he was joking, but I was like, that's a good one. If you're just driving around going like you. And there was somebody, there's somebody I know who leaves the most passive aggressive comments and stuff and says passive aggressive comments. And I was like, you're done. Yeah, you're just done.

[Maya Hawke]

You're just done.

[Pete Holmes]

Why are we doing this?

[Maya Hawke]

Why?

[Pete Holmes]

That sunk. Sunglasses.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Can't keep them.

[Maya Hawke]

Can't keep them. Don't wear Them and you make me sad. I'm done.

[Pete Holmes]

You make me sad.

[Maya Hawke]

You make me sad.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't like it's succession. I don't like how I feel when I'm with you.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, exactly.

[Pete Holmes]

Bye, Shiv.

[Maya Hawke]

Goodbye.

[Pete Holmes]

Sunglasses or shiv?

[Maya Hawke]

Sunglasses or shiv?

[Pete Holmes]

Shiv. Glasses.

[Maya Hawke]

Goodbye.

[Pete Holmes]

Bye.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Sexy redhead.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm not taking ownership over her body.

[Maya Hawke]

I didn't think you were.

[Pete Holmes]

Are we allowed to say sexy redhead?

[Maya Hawke]

I think yes.

[Pete Holmes]

I think it's, like, it felt weird coming out.

[Maya Hawke]

I think. I think you are. I think you are. If it's. I think if. In the right spirit.

[Pete Holmes]

You are the spirit of.

[Maya Hawke]

I think if you're like, I didn't like the show, and she was pretty bad, but she's a sexy redhead.

[Pete Holmes]

She's a piece of ace.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

No, I'm saying you are a sexy redhead. But I don't like how I feel when I'm with you. It informed what we were riffing on.

[Maya Hawke]

Exactly.

[Pete Holmes]

You're beautiful, but this sucks. Shiv. We're talking about Shiv.

[Maya Hawke]

You're in the process of remembering a performance moment in a piece of art that meant something to you.

[Pete Holmes]

Thank you.

[Maya Hawke]

Which inherently is not reductive to someone's work, is expansive, and therefore you can talk about them.

[Pete Holmes]

Thank you. You're like my entertainment lawyer. Like, he did call this actress sexy, but it was in the context of her powerful character.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Can I help it?

[Maya Hawke]

I don't know. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Do you want the next topic?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, I do. I also. I was gonna check my list soon, too.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, really?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. Well, we've gotten to a lot.

[Pete Holmes]

Smeagol.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, Schmeagle. Schmeagle's one of my guys.

[Pete Holmes]

What do you mean?

[Maya Hawke]

Remember we talked about our character? I talked about the baby princess is

[Pete Holmes]

an archetype for sure.

[Maya Hawke]

So, like, Schmel, like, I. We had a really. I had a powerful night because I finally, like, was stoned enough to properly introduce Christian to Schmel. And I think it made him, like, understand me better than ever because he

[Pete Holmes]

was like, so we mean Gollum.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

You just, with respect, call him Schmeagle.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, but.

[Pete Holmes]

But, like, I know you really are, but.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, but, like. But he. Because he started. It came from. He was performing as me in a film fight. He did an impersonation of me. What? I'm like, in a fight. Christian did.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, Christian did.

[Maya Hawke]

Christian did. He.

[Pete Holmes]

What is it?

[Maya Hawke]

And all of it. He was like, oh, no. I see why you feel that way. I'm not mad. No, no, no, no. I Genuinely, these tremors. No, I just really want to figure out how to help. Like, I can tell that you're upset, and I really want to figure out how to help you. You. And, like, I know that I'm doing something wrong to make you upset, and, like, any anxiety you feel in me is just me trying to figure out what it is.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, and he started doing this for me, and I started hearing my internal monologue while he was pausing as me. By the way, his impersonation is better than I just did being myself, but I started hearing in the pauses what I was thinking, and I was like, oh, my gosh, I'm insane. Like, I was just like, oh, Like, I need to start communicating differently because the pauses are so loud and weird. Like, I think they're unnoticeable, but they're so weird. And then I was like, do you want to know what I'm thinking in those moments? Yeah, like. And I was like, it's like, there's a voice in my head going, he's being annoying. This is why you can't trust him. Like, he doesn't support your career. I knew he was gonna do this. I. You knew eventually he would have a hard time with you working too much. And this is the first sign. Like, watch out. Yeah, watch out. This is the sign. Don't trust him. Don't trust him. Like, no, you can't tell him that thing about yourself, because then he'll judge you.

[Pete Holmes]

Don't tell him everybody leaves.

[Maya Hawke]

Don't tell him everybody leaves. And so there's like, this schmeagle. Is the voice in your head going, like, yeah, that actress is better than you, but I bet if you lost five pounds, you would be as good as her. Like, that's the voice that's like. Like, like, yeah, no, you're never gonna. You're never gonna succeed in that way as long as you are prioritizing your wellness over your ambition. Like, man. You know, like, there's, like, it's this horrible little liar that comes in and is like. And sometimes it protect. Like, it's there. It was there at one time as some kind of protector or motivator.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. And, like, it was useful at some point. I hate to call it useful. No, it was, but at some point. It probably was useful at some point.

[Maya Hawke]

It was useful.

[Pete Holmes]

It's like anxiety.

[Maya Hawke]

Not just. No, it is anxiety.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah, but it's like, your character anxiety in the movie is useful. Yeah, it's like, that's why Riley does well at the game. Yeah, that's why she does well at the game. And I was like, respect because it

[Maya Hawke]

motivates her to practice.

[Pete Holmes]

Right. But then at a certain point, Riley will have to go. That's the voice that told me how to play hockey and how to show up when I was scared of the kids and all that stuff. But now I'm 47 years old, and I don't need that anymore.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. And in the beautiful way, like, Christian and I introducing each other to our inner voice during a fight. So, like, when we're triggered.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

When we're traumatized, when we're in our spiral stuff, being like, okay, you get to know this guy.

[Pete Holmes]

Mention number two. I can't believe you're 27 years old. I just can't believe it. Because that's some gold that you're saying right now.

[Maya Hawke]

Thank you.

[Pete Holmes]

Is recognizing that when. Especially when you're activated or whatever you want to say that there's a character that you're playing, and it's. It makes it so much less personal.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I call mine King Baby. King Baby is one of my parts. King Baby cannot tolerate that Valerie is favoring someone over. That's my wife favoring somebody over me. Ignoring me. Oh, I. And I'll just flip out. But now, you know, internally. But now I can just go, like, king Baby's online. Like, he's here. He. He doesn't like.

[Maya Hawke]

And she can go, oh, okay. Like I said, at it.

[Pete Holmes]

And that's all that it takes.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Just a little acknowledgment.

[Maya Hawke]

Just a little acknowledgement.

[Pete Holmes]

And we. And then I take it less personally.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. And I can go. We can be in a fight. And I can go. I'm filtering. Schmel. Like, I'm sorry. I'm filtering. Like, I'm only pausing because I'm. I'm. I'm getting messages that I don't like. I'm hearing voices.

[Pete Holmes]

That's right.

[Maya Hawke]

And I need a minute to pause and to, like, quiet down so I can see you, because I don't see you right now.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah. By the way, Stranger Things is a really good metaphor for overwhelming feelings.

[Maya Hawke]

Totally.

[Pete Holmes]

I know. I've always thought this on the cutting edge of Stranger Things commentary, but we say I'm in the upside down.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, because that. That's sometimes how you feel. You're in the world, but you can't even see it.

[Maya Hawke]

I can't even see it.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Because I'm so in my feelings.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm so in my feelings. I'm so in the negative place I'm so scared.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, I'm so scared.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm so scared.

[Pete Holmes]

That's the other thing. Sorry. Everyone's gonna laugh, probably because I say this too much. But I'm so proud of when. When the phrase I was embarrassed came into my relational vocabulary. Because I'll lash out, I'll make a mistake, and then the next thing that'll happen is I'm being mean for some reason, and then I'm like, wait. Oh, I was embarrassed.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I was embarrassed that you saw that I couldn't do that.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't know what it was. Let's say I slipped or I couldn't fix the car. I didn't know where. It was something I felt like I was supposed. It's tied to my identity. I couldn't do it. And now I have to cut you down. Otherwise, I have to believe the reports that I'm getting. Totally starting a fire to draw attention off of another news story.

[Maya Hawke]

I mean, just absolutely that happens. And embarrassment is so hard to move through. I mean, I. And fear and weirdness. Like, I. I used to do this thing. I finally outgrew it, but I still do it with other people. I outgrew it with Christian and, like. But I still do it in other places. Is. Would it be okay with you? Would you mind? I'm really, like, I. I. Of course you can come if you want, but I feel like it could be good for me maybe to have dinner alone with my friend Jen tonight is like, would that. Of course you're invited. But I. I also think it could if you wanted to do something else.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And then it's like, are you, Jen? Like, what? Like, why are you being so weird about this? Of course you can have dinner with your. Like, what. The fact that you think that you couldn't do that makes me.

[Pete Holmes]

It's tough. Toxic. Helping to a toxic level. Or.

[Maya Hawke]

Or being accommodating in a way that is suspicious. Because it's like, well, why are you scared of me? Like, something. And the answer is, I'm not scared of you. I'm scared of something else.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, I'm scared of how hard it was at some other time in my life to delineate any bubble of individuality.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

And, like. And I'm. And I love you so much. And I'm worried that if you impinge on my bubble of individuality, I will start to hit hate you. And so I'm trying.

[Pete Holmes]

I relate to this.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm trying to show you that, like, I'm trying to be Very careful with the way I introduce it so that you don't do something to make me hate you.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like. And I. And I took me so long to figure out that, like, oh, you just. You actually protect your love.

[Pete Holmes]

That's. No. And you protect your love. That. That is also ahead of your time. I think it took me. It still took me a really long time. Like, I mentioned the sauna that I took. We have a little sauna in our garage.

[Maya Hawke]

I love sauna.

[Pete Holmes]

Sauna, me too. But the sauna is the baby step of going, I'm gonna go be alone for an hour. But you can say, I'm gonna go sauna.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, you can.

[Pete Holmes]

You know what I mean? But it really is just. And, but with Valerie. Oh, I can. I just need to be alone for an hour. And she'd be fine with that.

[Maya Hawke]

That's like a muscle I'm working on strengthening so much. I don't know why those words, I need to be alone for an hour, I need to be alone are one of the hardest words.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

That can. It's like.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, for me, it's because if somebody says that to me or there was a lot of time in my life if somebody said, I just need to be alone for an hour, I. I would be. I knew it. I'm annoying. My Smeagol. I'm annoying. I'm too much. Like, that's one of my core negative beliefs is I'm too much. I knew you would, like, want to be away from me. Piece by piece, you've been building your case against me. And, like.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, that's not what mine's from. Okay, tell me mine is from being like. Is having people in my life who were like, where are you going? Where are you going? What? What? What? What do you mean you're leaving? Or. I think in some ways, like, maybe even from the. From having divorced parents, they became so possessive over their time with me.

[Pete Holmes]

Uhhuh.

[Maya Hawke]

That if I, like, eventually, like, I'd be like, hey, dad, like, Electra's birthday is this weekend. Can I go? And he'd be like, but this is our weekend.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

And I'd be like, okay, when is it going to be my weekend? Cuz last weekend it was her weekend. This weekend, it's your weekend. I know you're counting your weekends, but it's all my life.

[Pete Holmes]

Right? Right.

[Maya Hawke]

So when does it get to be my weekend? And I think I. There was some possessiveness over me as a child and of the time because it felt limited, because a part of it had Been taken away.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

That turned me into a person who was scared to ask to be alone.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. I'm like, we could take this out, but I think I can keep it in the boundaries of comfort and appropriateness. I'm just like, when you have. You can take your parents out of it. But I felt sort of responsible for how my parents felt a lot, and that had to do with showing up and being there. You know what I mean? So breaking away from that, even though my mom and dad were very supportive of my independence. But if you think you can. If you think you're in charge of their emotions, it can be tricky.

[Maya Hawke]

I think in many ways, every kid feels that way.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Which, like, I mean, you know, might be my way of drawing, whatever. But I.

[Pete Holmes]

No, I think.

[Maya Hawke]

But I think. I think, like, it's natural. Kids are really empathetic. They don't understand that they're kids yet. They feel like they have a lot of agency, and they go, okay, if I knock over the bottle off the table? Table, mom cries.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, you know, so I'm. If I can make sure not to knock over bottles, mom won't cry. Then you get a little older, and you're like, mom's crying. What did I do right?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, and then you're here with all

[Pete Holmes]

the bottles, totally fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes.

[Maya Hawke]

And. And then you have this kind. You have this sense of agency. And no matter how great your parents are and how much they like.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, I was just gonna say. I say to Leela all the time, you're not. You're not responsible for my feelings. Like, don't worry, because I. I'll catch her trying to catch. Cheer me up. She often guesses that I'm depressed when I'm not.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

It's just because I'm not, like, laughing or smiling. And she's like, what's wrong? And I'm like, no, no, nothing. Like, nothing is wrong.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

We're just chilling. It's okay.

[Maya Hawke]

It's okay.

[Pete Holmes]

Because I think what you're saying. Kids are looking for patterns, and they're looking for control.

[Maya Hawke]

I sometimes say I wish I would make. I'll be like, hey, Kristen, is there anything wrong? And. And he'll be like, no, nothing's wrong. I'm fine. It's all good. I'll be like. Then it would help me if you'd smile more.

[Pete Holmes]

Wow. Could you tell your face.

[Maya Hawke]

Could you tell your face? Because I'm getting anxious, like, reading into your face. And if actually nothing's wrong, will you just for a minute, give me some compliments and smile.

[Pete Holmes]

That's so sweet. Ask for what you need.

[Maya Hawke]

Ask for what you need.

[Pete Holmes]

I tell you. Tell that. Talk about it, like, being honest. Like, I need some eye contact from Val. I need her to touch me. I need her to check in.

[Maya Hawke]

Well, Big Baby would need that.

[Pete Holmes]

Big Baby needs it. And by the way, the king doesn't shame Big Baby. No, King says we have a big baby. We love this Big Baby. Because Big Baby is also the one that might show up when I need to create something.

[Maya Hawke]

Totally.

[Pete Holmes]

Because he still remembers how to play.

[Podcast Announcer]

He's also very scared, you know, like,

[Pete Holmes]

he sees a lot of different things.

[Maya Hawke]

He's a lot of things.

[Pete Holmes]

So we're trying to help Big Baby.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And you're saying, hey, could you smile? Like, when I. When Val and I are looking at each other, we're like hyper scanning each other's faces.

[Maya Hawke]

Are you big? Are you okay?

[Pete Holmes]

People, we do ask. We talk about how we're feeling a lot.

[Maya Hawke]

And, like, do you ever. Do you check in with your connection?

[Pete Holmes]

What does that mean?

[Maya Hawke]

Do you go like, how's our connection?

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, are we. Like, are we. Are you feeling very connected to me right now? Are you feeling a little.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, that's a good line. I. We don't use that line. But I. That's in our ballpark. I would like that.

[Maya Hawke]

It's cool. I like that one. I can't remember. We developed that one to escape from one that had been become.

[Pete Holmes]

What was that?

[Maya Hawke]

It was like someone. It might have been just like, are you okay?

[Pete Holmes]

Are we good?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, Are we good? Are you okay? That maybe became a little attacky. That was like, yeah, I'm okay. What? Like, you know, like, yes, we talk a lot. Are you mad at me? How's our connection? Came into replace. Are you mad at me?

[Pete Holmes]

That's good. That's very good. How's our connection?

[Maya Hawke]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. I will say let's just connect. Yeah, it's a big one. Let's just connect and let's just drop what we're doing. Especially if you're rushing or getting lost in the routine of getting ready for school and going to the thing. It's like, can we just.

[Maya Hawke]

Can we just connect?

[Pete Holmes]

Stop. Yeah, I do it with my daughter, too. It's like, it's so funny. I go, baby, just come into the present. And she's like, it's not a present. It's awful. I'm like, wow, you are my queen. She said that last night.

[Maya Hawke]

Not a present.

[Pete Holmes]

She Was. She was getting all sad about how a tree was gonna die. She's so sweet that. Actually, I think this. This goes into What? Permission to say the worst thing.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, yeah, That's. I mean, this is all similar.

[Pete Holmes]

It goes in. This totally goes in this.

[Maya Hawke]

Permission to say the worst thing is like, okay, my. This. This was created before the invention of Schmeagle, but is similar, which is like, I'm having a bad thought. I'm mad at you about something. Smart. Me. The. The dragon. The king knows that there's something wrong with it, knows that I'm not right to be jealous about this or mad at you about that, but I can't sort out the truth.

[Pete Holmes]

You need to say it.

[Maya Hawke]

I need to say it.

[Pete Holmes]

I need to say it.

[Maya Hawke]

I need to say it so that you and I can talk about what's true and what's not true.

[Pete Holmes]

Can we be safe to just shoot one into the air?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm not shooting you.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm not shooting you.

[Pete Holmes]

I. It's one of the strangest phenomenons about being a human. Human is I can have a thought, which is really a feeling. You know, it's coming. It's representing a feeling. And I know it's not really helpful. I know it's not rational. I know it's not real, but I won't feel right. This doesn't always happen. I won't feel right until I say it. I need to be able to say I felt betrayed or whatever it might have been. But then, to your point, once it's on the table now, we can at least look at it and unpack it.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

You know what I mean?

[Maya Hawke]

We can look at it together and figure out what part's true and what part's not true.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And like. And I want to make sure that you know before I say this permission that I'm not saying it to you.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm not calling you a dick. I'm saying I thought you were being a dick in this moment, and I got really mad at you.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

Because I felt like you shut me down two times in a row, and it made. And like. And I was really upset.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like. And can we talk about it?

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, what was your experience of that time?

[Pete Holmes]

Have you read Nonviolent parenting or anything? There's a couple things. One, a great question that he. The author, suggests people ask each other, which I thought you might like, is, what's alive for you right now? It's a nice. It's a. To me, you have to be with the right People.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

You can't just say that to anybody. But I like saying, like, what's alive for you right now? Just, like, what's going on?

[Maya Hawke]

Alive or a lie?

[Pete Holmes]

Alive.

[Maya Hawke]

Alive.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. What's a lie for you right now?

[Maya Hawke]

What. How many lies are you living in?

[Pete Holmes]

How are you playing? Playing me? What game? What's your game? What's a lie for you right now? No, alive. Because it could be a bad feeling, it could be a good feeling. But anyway, what we're talking about with the worst thing is, like, you take so nonviolent parent. Nonviolent. Did I say parenting? Nonviolent communication.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, you said parenting.

[Pete Holmes]

I meant nonviolent communication.

[Maya Hawke]

You were thinking about parenting.

[Pete Holmes]

But there is a book called nonviolent parenting, which is the application of this towards parenting. But it's everything. You take ownership of your feelings. So let's. It sounded like you were kind of going towards something like this. You say you were just a dick just then. Right. So you say, like, I'm feeling sad and a little defensive because my need for connection wasn't being met. But you keep it on you.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

So it's like you said, you seemed like a dick, but you put it to a feeling. Like, I was feeling lonely and I was feeling scared because my need for our identity as a couple wasn't being met.

[Maya Hawke]

So. Very interesting. I think this is an amazing tool and works very well. I think, for some people who are, like, over therapized New York ified, you know, from Harry Potter land.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Maya Hawke]

That can come so easily as a gear. It starts to edge into manipulation. Let me show you how good of a communicator I am. Am. Let me show you. Like, you know, like, there was this thing that you were doing.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And, like. And it was. But it. But it wasn't that you. I. I feel. I felt triggered. I felt this. I like. And sometimes where pers. Permission to say the worst thing comes in is, like, while I'm being that big eye. Like, big eye person.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm actually shoving my rage down. Right. Like, into my stomach.

[Pete Holmes]

This is your book. Permission to say the worst thing is your book.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. And I'm not letting the rage out at all. But you can feel it.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

In my pretentious like. Well, it made me feel when you

[Pete Holmes]

said, what's alive for me is a bit of a. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Right. It's like.

[Pete Holmes]

And there's a time to, like, break rooms where you just want to smash some plates or you just want to emotionally be safe to let out the truest feeling.

[Maya Hawke]

And to show someone that you're ugly, too.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. What's so offensive that you're angry or what's so offensive. Offensive that you're a little like a toddler right now or.

[Maya Hawke]

And I think if you. If you just do that, you're a jerk. But if you bring it up first and say this, like, even to go to your show, the big fight that you and Kat have at the end. Right. I kept thinking, yeah. On the street, I thought their relationship was amazing because it kept wandering the line of, like, is this too crazy or are they soulmates? I can't. I can't figure it. Like, one moment, it's one thing. One moment, it's the other thing. And I. I can't tell.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Maya Hawke]

Until that fight. But with that fight, if she'd gone home, if she'd had a great night that night, the character. Right. And then she'd gone home with you.

[Pete Holmes]

She was jealous because it was my.

[Maya Hawke]

She was jealous. It was your ex girlfriend, and you weren't giving her enough attention. And she felt like she. She was drunk and she felt like she could tell that you guys were cheating.

[Pete Holmes]

Deaf voice.

[Maya Hawke]

And then she did. Deaf voice. Yeah. And. But if she had been totally normal the whole night, just a little drunken, sad, and then gone home and go. Can I say the worst thing?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, I'm really worried that you're your ex girlfriend. And it made me mad. And it made me think that you were stupid and taking advantage of me. And I just felt like, rage. Like. And if you consented to hearing the worst thing.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And then she'd behave that way. Like, you'd probably be like, oh, my God, I love you, you sweet person. Your brain, like, your brain did that before too.

[Pete Holmes]

And I understand. It's like when something scientists are trying to work on a virus or something, they'll make a sandbox. They'll make a digital sandbox where they put a copy of the code they're working on and they put the bad thing in there so they can just look at it.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

But they know it's the sandbox. It's not. It's not in the wide pool of the code. It's just in this little place. So that's permission to say the worst thing.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

But it. But to be safe enough. I. I really love what you're saying. Val and I have that kind of relationship too, where it's like, I just want to tell you because we don't do none. I'm not turning my back on Nonviolent communication. I'm just saying we also. I love nonviolent communication.

[Maya Hawke]

It's an amazing tool. Yeah, it's an amazing tool.

[Pete Holmes]

But there's a time and a place to just be. Like, I want you to know, like, sometimes I haven't had Hulk in a while, but sometimes I would be so angry, I'd just picture Hulk breaking a bathroom, and I'm like, it's kind of dishonest to just have that Hulk breaking bathroom thing and break. Be like, when you didn't look at me during my birthday song, I felt. Yeah. My needs for song. Eye contact were not being met.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Or whatever it is. It could be both. It could be both.

[Maya Hawke]

Totally.

[Pete Holmes]

I like permission to say the worst

[Maya Hawke]

thing because it is abusive if you don't get consent.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, that's just called a bad relationship.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, that's just called a bad relationship. But if you get consent to show that part of yourself and then that part gets love.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

All of a sudden, that's actually most of what that part needs to heal. And if you never show that part because you're only doing nonviolent communication, then that part never heals.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

It just gets layers and layers and layers of this is how I should behave. Put on top of it.

[Pete Holmes]

Of course.

[Maya Hawke]

Okay. One of my things on my list for you was, do you use AI?

[Pete Holmes]

I use AI very sparingly. Is this. Is Christian Lee Hudson going to come in and yell at me?

[Maya Hawke]

No.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh.

[Maya Hawke]

But I. This is what I don't understand about AI right now. I don't use AI.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Because I don't trust myself because I thought I could, like, have an Instagram and it wouldn't be a big deal. And, like, I lost my mind.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, really?

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. Off the phone.

[Pete Holmes]

And I. AI, by the way. Sorry. A lot of thoughts. I love that you brought up AI and we're like, we'll be done in 10 minutes.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, there's no way.

[Maya Hawke]

Well, here's my question.

[Pete Holmes]

You go. You go.

[Maya Hawke]

I don't understand people. Everyone's like, if you asked a group of people were like, who thinks AI might be. Be the end of humanity? Like, most people go, me. And then if you're like, who's used AI today? Most people will go, me.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

It seems so simple. We're barreling towards the end of humanity, and the one thing we all have to do is not use this.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't know if that's accurate.

[Maya Hawke]

The companies will all go bankrupt if we all just didn't use it.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't know if that's accurate.

[Maya Hawke]

It's not true.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't know. They made $300 billion from funding last month.

[Maya Hawke]

But okay, but it was, but, but just fund. That's like a, Isn't that in an investment? Like what happened with the scooters. Like it's a bubble because people are investing in a ton of money on the idea that it will make money.

[Pete Holmes]

I actually like what you're saying and I'm going to check myself after I've wrecked myself. I think if everybody stopped using it, it would be a huge disruption, obviously very disruptive. I'm. This is, I'm going to keep this really quick. I'm starting to look into more voices on the AI thing and one of the more interesting things I've heard lately is that the narrative, narrative that if they OpenAI or anthropic or whoever it is, if they're not like left unregulated and well funded, it'll lead to the end of the world, is actually a really useful narrative for the health of their company. They want you to be afraid that the world's gonna explode, so we'll just keep giving them money and beat China to it. But the idea is AGI, which is what we have right now is large language model, which is kind of like it doesn't know what it's saying. It's not actually thinking. AGI would be the actual intelligent model. But AGI is just a theory at this point.

[Maya Hawke]

But it's not AGI that I'm worried about already there. The models that we have are replacing people's jobs and I'm worried about mass unemployment and us hurdle like hurdling blindly toward being like, yeah, you know, it would be fun if I didn't hire a real photo editor. I'm going to hire, I'm going to use this.

[Pete Holmes]

That's already happening.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah, yeah. And then we've got mass unemployment. What's everybody doing?

[Pete Holmes]

Right? I, I still, again, the research that I've done, and I think you can go in all different ways, is that a lot of the companies that are replacing their employees with AI are, are regretting it. It's not working out as well as they want. I can't speak to everything that makes me optimistic.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, I, I like that this guy, what's his name? Something Harris. I like this guy whose name I can't remember.

[Pete Holmes]

Sam Harris.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. Is he in a big anti AI guy? No, no. There's some guy named Something Harris who I, who is very alarmist, who I maybe is the. The Kool Aid I've been drinking.

[Pete Holmes]

I. You seem.

[Maya Hawke]

Not that. Yeah, I think Tristan Harris.

[Pete Holmes]

All I've. I just found a couple voices. One of them is Barry's ACC Economics that are talking about AI in a way that I hadn't considered, which is like, who benefits from the story that everything this could end.

[Maya Hawke]

I don't understand how the companies benefit

[Pete Holmes]

from it because they're saying, let us keep going. Don't regulate us. Don't. Don't put any restraints on what we're doing. Give us all the money in the world because the fate of the world is in our hands, when really it would be better spent to not. Not we. We should be regulating. We should be going.

[Maya Hawke]

I don't feel like most people are afraid that, like, Chinese AI is going to ruin the world. Most people are afraid that, like, these five guys who are inventing AI here are going to become the entire government in control of all the money and all of the empire. Like the. Yeah, yeah. Which they already are. Right. Like it's kind of already a puppet government for tech billionaires. And now we're done.

[Pete Holmes]

Now you have to go. Yeah. It's a. It's a big topic. And. And this is. Is my 75 milligrams of weed. I couldn't. I can't regurgitate everything that I learned. I'll say. I'm getting a vague sense that it might not be what we thought it was. Cool.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm not saying optimistic about that. My feeling is that until we know, all the people who are worried about it shouldn't be using it.

[Pete Holmes]

That's a fair point. I haven't heard that. I haven't heard that. I am subscribed. You know what I mean? I am contributing. It is interesting that that's. That hasn't occurred to us yet to just be like, just don't.

[Maya Hawke]

Well, that's my thing. Everyone's like, social media is the worst. Delete it. Like, what?

[Pete Holmes]

No, that. You just named our times.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

It's like, wow, this fucking sucks. And I use the thing that funds the thing that.

[Maya Hawke]

What if we just didn't use it? I don't know. Like, whoa.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Crazy.

[Pete Holmes]

A lot of the anti AI videos I watch, the person making it will be like. And I use ChatGPT. I use it every day at my work. So, yeah, you're not. Not off. Do you. To end. Not that. That's not a good note to end on.

[Maya Hawke]

No.

[Pete Holmes]

I could ask you about one more

[Maya Hawke]

of these or you could tell no, I'm excited.

[Pete Holmes]

A. Oh, this is connected. What?

[Maya Hawke]

The Human Revolution. This is what I'm trying to start.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Maya Hawke]

I'm trying to. This is connected to AI. Weirdly, I picked the same one. The Human Revolution. Like, like, I just think that, like, we should be people. And why, Like, I don't understand why. Why we're seeding our intelligence diligence to these machines. Like, black and white. Your phone call, your friends.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, oh, social media is making you miss people. Delete your account.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, like. And if it's making you money, then, like, set strict out. Like, and that's how you feed yourself and live your life.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Set. Give yourself work hours.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, like, like an office. And like, I. I just like, in. In. Let's invest in each other and in people and start the human revolution. And stop using. There are billboards all over San Francisco that say, stop hiring humans. Yet. Like, it's. It's apocalyptic. And I, like, we don't. I don't know. I. I'm. I'm just one. I want to start the human revolution.

[Pete Holmes]

No, I love it. And when I talk to people in their 20s and they talk like you talk, I have a lot of hope because I'm a dumb Gen Xer that I'm like, this thing just made a picture of a hot dog with a face. And like, you guys are like, we see what's happening. We're not gonna do it. So good for you.

[Maya Hawke]

I don't know.

[Pete Holmes]

I believe in it. Yeah, I believe in it. I think you do have. I think we. I'm not taking myself out of it. We have a lot more agency than we think.

[Maya Hawke]

We have some.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

Like, I don't know, but we have some and we should probably use that.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I agree.

[Maya Hawke]

I agree.

[Pete Holmes]

Can you tell me a time in your life you laughed so hard you thought you were going to throw up or pee your pants? Yeah, like, I'm looking for a hard laugh story to end.

[Maya Hawke]

Oh, God, I wish I'd been able to prepare thinking about this.

[Pete Holmes]

Maybe you were a kid.

[Maya Hawke]

Yes, I was a kid.

[Pete Holmes]

Maybe you were in a situation. You're not supposed to laugh. Maybe church. You're in woods.

[Maya Hawke]

Didn't go to church.

[Pete Holmes]

Maybe some sort of ayahuasca circle.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah. Oh, wow. Oh, that's so funny. I laughed trying to think of some weird time about my life. I.

[Pete Holmes]

Or a scene you couldn't get through. Yeah, that's a place that you're not supposed to laugh.

[Maya Hawke]

No, you're not supposed to laugh. On scene. I laugh. I'm a pretty laughy. I laugh all the time. Oh, God. Oh, I'm such a disaster.

[Pete Holmes]

You're not. You're doing one. Don't let Smeagol on the. Smeagol's not the guest.

[Maya Hawke]

That's true. Smeagol is not the guest. Oh, I. You know what? I actually already brought it up. And so it's a good circular thing, this conversation, this debate. It was the day after my wedding, and I was the most hungover I've ever been in my entire life. And I went and hung out with my brother and his best friend and his girlfriend and Christian, and we all watched the new show. I'm gonna plug a show now that I love. The night. The Night of the Seven Kingdoms, the new Game of Thrones spinoff. It's so great.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, really?

[Maya Hawke]

We went to watch the season finale of that, but before it, we had this four hour debate about whether or not if a tree fell in a forest. Doesn't make a sound. We're back. And I got. When I laugh really hard, I don't just laugh. I get the wiggles. And it's like, I'm so excited. I had it on the balcony in San Francisco, too. I was like, this is what I wanted my life to look like, and it looks like it. And I'm so happy. And we were talking about this. We ended up getting to the blue and black dress versus the white and gold dress. Do you remember this dress?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Maya Hawke]

And we all saw it differently. And my brother was impassionately, positively disagreeing with me that I was like, no, no. But the thing is, I am right. The dress at the store is, in fact, blue and black. So, like, let's discuss what might be going on with your eyes or your perception. I think what's happening is you're not seeing the object past the light. You're just seeing the light. He was like, what makes you say it's real? It's not real. And I was like, well, you're just seeing like. He was like. I was like, you're just seeing this. I was like. He was like, look, zoom in. It's gold. It's not real. It's. And I was like, no, it's just shadows. And. And he was like, well, okay, hold on. Wait. Can we just agree that shadows are real? Are shadows real? And I rolled on the fly. Like, I didn't deliver it right. But it was just the question of hours into this debate in the middle of getting all the way back to our shadows. Real, like made me laugh until I peed.

[Pete Holmes]

Fantastic. I think you delivered it well.

[Maya Hawke]

Thank you.

[Pete Holmes]

And the line in your album, I still fit nicely tucked in your shadow.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

It's a great line.

[Maya Hawke]

Thank you.

[Pete Holmes]

You should be proud of the record. Say the name again. Just because I didn't.

[Maya Hawke]

Maitreya. Course.

[Pete Holmes]

So yeah. My Tre Corso.

[Maya Hawke]

Like Gregory Corso.

[Pete Holmes]

Like Gregory Coro.

[Maya Hawke]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, that'll help me beat poet remember.

[Maya Hawke]

Shall I be married? Shall I be good a st the girl next door with my suit and tie and my fistest hood I wasn't

[Pete Holmes]

raised by Ethan Hawk.

[Maya Hawke]

Don't take her to movies or to cemeteries.

[Pete Holmes]

No, I had a regular dad.

[Maya Hawke]

Okay, Bye.

[Pete Holmes]

You have to say keep it crispy.

[Maya Hawke]

Keep it crispy.

[Pete Holmes]

Bye.

[Maya Hawke]

Bye.

[Pete Holmes]

Did great job. Thank you.

[Maya Hawke]

Thank you so much. You.

[Pete Holmes]

You.