Taran Killam Returns

Summary

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You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes

Episode: Taran Killam Returns

Release Date: March 25, 2026
Guest: Taran Killam
Summary by Podcast Expert

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Episode Overview

In this lively and laughter-filled return episode, Pete Holmes welcomes back SNL alum Taran Killam for an exuberant, nostalgia-soaked conversation. Friends and comedy peers, Pete and Taran riff and reminisce on the weirdness of showbiz, generational differences, their comedic inspirations, and the craft and culture of comedy. They swap stories from SNL, debate the subtle nuances of comedic performance, and bond over deep-cut references from sketch comedy, classic films, and '90s pop culture.

The episode brims with impressions, playful debates, and mutual admiration, offering listeners both a lighthearted hangout and thoughtful insights into comedy’s evolution, especially on projects like "I Think You Should Leave" and Adult Swim’s “Haha, You Clowns.” By the end, it’s clear why Taran keeps returning — the on-mic chemistry is infectious, inviting the audience into their shared comedic language.

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Key Topics and Discussions

1. Appearances and Judging People

• Wisdom vs. Reality: Pete and Taran kick off by mulling over whether people “look like how they are,” challenging snap judgments.
  • Quote: "People do look like how they are. I could argue that. And people aren't like how they look." – Pete [05:02]
  • Taran’s insight: The difference between nature (intrinsic) and nurture (lifestyle, choices) in shaping appearance and persona.

2. Comedy Inside Baseball: SNL Writers’ Room and Legacies

• Deep dive into the legacy and style of SNL favorites Tim Robinson and Zach Cregger.
  • Taran nostalgia: Rooming with Zach Cannon and Tim Robinson at SNL, acquiring an NBA Jam machine to “jazz up our office” (and the resulting hijinks).
  • Quote (on Tim and Zach): "Their stuff, oh my God... it was like being next to Mr. Hershey pouring the chocolate bars and leaving the factory." – Pete [11:40]

3. Comedy Styles and Influence

• Dissecting the impact of “I Think You Should Leave” and "Oh, Hello", and how they changed comedy and daily conversation.
  • Quote: "Tim Robinson and Zach Canaan, they figured out a way to talk and look at the world that became incredibly infectious." – Pete [10:41]
• Taran’s pride at witnessing their early genius first-hand at SNL.

4. Nostalgia for 90s Media and Home Improvement

• The joys of emulators, old arcade games ("NBA Jam" and “Sunset Riders”), and the difference in how today’s youth relates to endless entertainment.
  • Quote (on emulators): "You have it at home. You have them all at home, bro." – Taran [15:04]
• Recommendation: Haha, You Clowns (Adult Swim), an animated series drawing on '90s sitcom vibes and absurdity.
  • “It’s warped Home Improvement... 12-minute episodes, brilliant blend of earnest plots and grotesque satire.” – Taran [20:14]

5. Comedy Impressions and SNL Memories

• Extended riffing and impressions: Alf, Simpsons, Michael Caine in "The Dark Knight," Brad Pitt, David Brent (The Office UK), and more.
• The skill and pressure of doing impressions for audiences who may not “know what Mike Birbiglia sounds like.”
  • Quote: “Seth said pretty early on, 'I hope Tim becomes famous enough that your impression will become worthwhile.'” – Taran [45:43]

6. Reflections on Comedy’s Inner Workings

• Insight into why certain sketches don’t make it to air at SNL, and the role of tone and “melody” in defining what makes the show.
• Taran describes the trajectory of Tim Robinson, from cast member to writer, and how “I Think You Should Leave” eventually became an outlet for ideas SNL passed over.
  • “There becomes a hive mentality tendency for the tone of the show… you’re trying to make a melody out of it.” – Taran [44:19]
• Pete’s observation: Tim focuses on adults who have "big feelings" they don't know how to express, finding comedy in denial and rage.

7. Movie Talk & Actor Obs.

• Fun dissections of Brad Pitt’s filmography, talk patterns, and impression ("Ma', am, I'm 12 years old…").
• Pete’s pet theory: similarity between Brad Pitt and Macaulay Culkin’s manner of speaking.
  • Taran delivers spot-on impersonations, blending Home Alone dialogue with Pitt’s voice. [58:17]
• Deep affection for films like “Fight Club,” “Jesse James,” “True Romance” and thoughtful takes on more recent indie and genre films (“Eddington,” “Beau is Afraid”).

8. Pop Culture, The Office, and British Humor

• Extended quoting/game riff on The Office (UK), culminating in a shared appreciation for the emotional resonance and realism of David Brent.
  • “One of the best moments of cinema.” – Pete on Brent telling off Finchy [83:17]
• They ponder what’s changed in sitcom tropes: who “wins” in White Lotus vs. The Office.

9. On Artistic Inspiration

• Both discuss what recent art or comedy projects inspired them: Chris Fleming's HBO special, Nirvana the Band the Show.
  • “Every once in a while you see something and it gives you hope…” – Pete [73:51]
• Talking about how, no matter what AI may do, the unique perspective of “who made it, how they made it,” is irreplaceable.

10. Life and Career Updates

• Taran promotes his current projects:
  • “Stumble” (NBC/Peacock) - a show finding an audience and critical praise.
  • “High Potential” (ABC) – recently renewed.
• Sincere gratitude for still being able to create and work on well-liked projects.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On first impressions:
  "People do look like how they are. I could argue that. And people aren't like how they look." – Pete, [05:02]
• On comedy influences:
  "Tim Robinson and Zach Canaan found a way to talk and look at the world that was incredibly infectious, without a doubt." – Pete [10:41]
• On arcade game nostalgia:
  "You have it at home. You have them all at home, bro." – Taran [15:04]
• On SNL legacy:
  "The struggle is so, like, undefinable and circumstantial… Like, Tim was always the funniest. When he came in, you thought, you're next level funny." – Taran [42:36]
• On impressions:
  "Seth said pretty early on, 'I hope Tim becomes famous enough that your impression will become worthwhile.'" – Taran [45:43]
• On inspiration:
  "Every once in a while you see something and you're just like… It gives you hope." – Pete [73:51]
• David Brent/Office UK quote-off:
  "Keep your head down, Tim. What are you doing? Don't work, and in a few years, you'll be a Nazi." – Pete & Taran riff [85:00]

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Highlighted Timestamps

• [05:00-07:30] – Looks vs. personality, don’t judge a book by its cover
• [11:00-14:00] – SNL office stories, NBA Jam machine caper
• [20:00-21:30] – Taran recommends “Haha, You Clowns”
• [42:00-44:50] – Tim Robinson’s SNL struggle, how shows define their internal tone
• [73:30-74:10] – Artistic hope and what inspires professionals
• [79:00-82:30] – Extended The Office UK quote-off, both nailing David Brent and Finchy moments
• [88:00-90:00] – Music and heightening in The Office’s Christmas Special

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Overall Tone

The conversation is playful, warm, and densely referential— a genuine hang between two comics who love the details and layers of their craft. Much of the humor is in rapid-fire impressions, callbacks, and the sincere celebration of creativity, both in the past and present. Taran and Pete’s mutual admiration is on display, making for an episode that’s both entertaining and insightful.

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For Listeners

• If you love SNL, sketch comedy, '90s culture, or deep comedy nerdery: this is a delight.
• Best moments: The SNL backstage stories and their inside-baseball discussion on how iconic sketches and shows are shaped are gold for comedy fans.
• Recurring themes: Nostalgia, the evolution of comedic language, deep dives into what makes certain comedians unique, the timeless quest for authenticity in art.
• Skip to the Office UK section if you want to hear one of the best unscripted quote-offs ever.

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Final Word

This episode is a treat for anyone fascinated by the mechanics of comedy, the creatives behind contemporary classics, or just looking for an hour of infectious banter between two joyful, masterful weirdos.

Transcript

[Taran Killam]

You made it with. You made it with. You made it with. Oh yeah, you made it with. Yes, you made it weird.

[Pete Holmes]

You made it weird with Pete Holmes. What's happening, weirdos? This is the. This is the return of Taran Killam. The first time Taran did the podcast I was like, oh, we should have a podcast together. And barring that, we're just going to keep doing this podcast every once in a while because he's incredible. He's so funny. I died laughing. I'm so glad you're here. Check out Taran. He's on a bunch of shows. He's on a great show called Stumble that people are absolutely loving. He's also in high potential. Just check him out wherever you get your Taran Killams. Also you can check me out. I'm on the road. I also look at this. This is new. This is my kids book, spells to cast on your parents. It is a book that encourages parents to be silly. Get it in frame there to be silly with their children. And I'm thrilled to say that it's available for pre order wherever you get your Taran Killams, wherever you get your books. I worked really hard on it to make my daughter like it and she loves it. And basically the idea is the book is guarded by a dragon and you have to prove that you're a wizard because the book is only for wizards. And the only way to prove to the wizard, I'm sorry, to the dragon that you are a wizard is to cast spells on your grownup and makes you do all these funny silly things. So it's a lot of fun. It's very silly light work for the parent. I don't want anybody doing anything crazy. But check it out. Spells to cast on your parents. Also my special lot to plug for me. I guess my special silly silly fun boy is available now on YouTube for free. So why not watch it a few hundred thousand times. Just go to YouTube.com it's a website and if you're subscribed to me you'll see it right there in your feed. Or just type in Pete Holmes. It'll probably be the first thing it's on 800 pound gorilla and I'm thrilled with it. I it love, I love it so much. I hope you love it. Last thing peteholmes.com is my tour dates. I'm going to be in Tallahassee. I'm going to be in Irving, Texas, Los Angeles on April 29 for Largo, Madison, Denver, north and South Carolina, Vancouver, Seattle and Portland. Hope to See you out there. And thank you to all the weirdos that came out to Royal Oak. Those were awesome shows in Michigan. And without further ado, please enjoy. Buckle up and get ready to enjoy the incredible taran kill em. Get into it. So we are 1/4 into 2026 and AI is already doing incredible, amazing things. It's going kind of nuts. At first it was like, I've got this. And we're like, do you? And it's like, well actually, yeah, it does. It's hiring humans, it's running databases in seconds. You got co working agents that feel like your replacement on a slow Tuesday. Yeah, great, great, great. But honestly, just the beginning. And instead of panicking, we need to get smart about it, we need to get smart with it. That's where Outskill comes in. Outskill is an AI education platform built to help you actually use AI in your work, not just watch videos about it. They've already helped over 10 million people across 100 plus countries and it's completely free to check out. They're hosting a two day live AI mastermind this weekend. 16 hours total, Saturday and Sunday, 10 to 7 Eastern. So it works globally. You'll learn how to build AI agents that can plan, execute and report for you, authorize workflows while you sleep, connect tools like Google Sheets and Notion. Basically save hours every week and get real edge at work. And this isn't just random AI guru type stuff. This is built from insights from a hundred plus practitioners at companies like Nvidia and Microsoft. Plus bonuses worth $5,000, prompt libraries, a custom AI toolkit builder, and even a roadmap to make money with AI. So just for signing up, you get their AI survival hackbook to stay ahead of the crazy changes. So click the link in the description or scan that QR code, join their WhatsApp community and get ahead of the thing before it gets ahead of you.

[Julia Louis-Dreyfus]

Hi, it's Julia Louis Dreyfus here and I can't wait for you to hear our new episode of Wiser Than Me with Cyndi Lauper on Amazon Music. Cindy may be a girl who just wants to have fun, but for 40 years she has brought playfulness and a dash of punk to some serious activism. We talk about her lifelong LGBTQ advocacy, her astonishing music career, and pick up a whole lot of wisdom along the way. Listen now only on Amazon Music included with Prime.

[Pete Holmes]

We're having a little. A little.

[Taran Killam]

We're doing a little camera catch up, showbiz, inside, baseball chat.

[Pete Holmes]

Who cares?

[Taran Killam]

Hey, you know that guy? I know that Guy.

[Pete Holmes]

I know that guy. But then you. Which by the way, can I say you're about to say something that we.

[Taran Killam]

I hope you're about to say what you said, which was like a real kernel that pe the way people look. Oh, that's like. Start with some wisdom.

[Pete Holmes]

Let's drop some whiz. Yeah, drop some whiz.

[Taran Killam]

Okay. I said I'd never drop Wiz on a video podcast.

[Pete Holmes]

You know, the show, get that Wiz out.

[Taran Killam]

And you made it weird out of the gate.

[Pete Holmes]

You know, it's been a while. Yeah, we called it that. It was appropriate for a while because usually one or two times during the episode there would be. Yeah, it's 12 years ago. I learned a lot. But anyway, there would be more authentic weird moments I did say. And I think this is true. Although I think let's look at both sides of it and then your recommendation, because that's what we were getting excited about. People do look like how they are. I could argue that. And people aren't like how they look.

[Taran Killam]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

We were Starting with I'm 46, I'm going to be 47 this month. I'm still figuring out that just because someone looks kind of like a gentle giant or an affable doofus, easygoing face.

[Taran Killam]

Right. That doesn't mean there's always more beneath the surface. But the way you went back on your own sort of sage soundbite.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, I did.

[Taran Killam]

Is that. But they also look like they do. And to me that rings true of nature versus nurture. The nature is who they are inherently. It does not always connect with the exterior. Yeah, but the nurture is I like wearing sweatpants. I don't like putting in a lot of effort. I like a short haircut. I like.

[Pete Holmes]

The nurture is reliable.

[Taran Killam]

That's the nurture you can rely on that starts to where your external reflects your internal, but that you shouldn't. To paraphrase your off camera wisdom, you shouldn't.

[Pete Holmes]

Ocw.

[Taran Killam]

Ocw. You shouldn't presume you know someone based off. Don't judge a book by its cover.

[Pete Holmes]

Absolutely not. Yeah, it's okay. So it would have been such a better soundbite and a better clip if I was just like, we need to learn that people aren't how they look. And that is true.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

It just so happens that Valerie, my wife and I just a couple days ago were like, it's kind of true sometimes. Okay, Like I'll give you an example.

[Taran Killam]

Sure.

[Pete Holmes]

This is mean. But there was a guy I knew and he Was like, I'm. I look at pornography like five times a day. And I was like, oh, like, I could see it in his eyes.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

There's a dartiness. There's a summary of sexual parts. I'm not saying that's everybody. I'm just saying, like, sometimes there's something to be, but that's nurture. I actually like your theory.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

You're giving me a lot of eye contact. You're very steady.

[Taran Killam]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

There's something grounded about your demeanor. This is why we love stories like Dirty John.

[Taran Killam]

Like.

[Pete Holmes]

Or maybe you're a fucking killer. Right?

[Taran Killam]

I'll never tell. I'll never tell any of you. Do we both remember that movie trailer? Very. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

No, it was Kril Interrupted.

[Taran Killam]

It was don't tell or something. Don't say. It's the one where she's writing the number of the. Of the social. Of the bank, of the security vault. She goes, oh, it's Britney Murphy. She goes, I'll never tell any of you. Cut to the clip.

[Pete Holmes]

I think we have a clip. You want to hear the worst New Yorker cartoon I ever drew?

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

It's a late night show and there's a. There's a cookie.

[Taran Killam]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

And the Conan type person is saying. It says here you brought a chip.

[Taran Killam]

Okay, great. Yeah. Why are you still doing this? How is this not. How is this not framed? Why are we looking at generic city skyline? Should choose.

[Pete Holmes]

I believe you bought a chip. I used to have a frame New Yorker cartoon. Both of these are rejected.

[Taran Killam]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

Where it's a guy and a therapist. It's a crow on a therapist couch.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

No words. And there's a speech bubble. And in the speech bubble, there's a drawing of a scarecrow that I would yell at the editor to say, you should have bought that.

[Taran Killam]

Should have bought that.

[Pete Holmes]

Perfect for the New York.

[Taran Killam]

Were you on salary? Were you on the thing or you submitted independently?

[Pete Holmes]

I was, I guess, freelance.

[Taran Killam]

Freelance.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah. I sold three.

[Taran Killam]

Zach Cannon.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. And now look at him.

[Taran Killam]

Is doing grades.

[Pete Holmes]

How must he feel? You know what I mean? Him and Tim Robinson have changed comedy.

[Taran Killam]

Defining voice of comedy for a generation.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes. It will be like, who's on first?

[Taran Killam]

You hear it all the time in interviews. I think it was Amy Poehler's podcast I listened to recently. She's like. And then it's like that sort of. I think you can leave no cross

[Pete Holmes]

promotion, no mentioning other podcasts.

[Taran Killam]

But people do go, oh, it's like, Tim Robinson, I think you should leave kind of comedy. Right.

[Pete Holmes]

That's Exactly, Right. Yeah. You know what was pre that was like, oh, hello. Melanie and Kroll had that, like. And you have a hamburger sandwich. They had this like. And Tim Robinson only listen.

[Taran Killam]

I'm not saying I am in awe of both of their abilities. Oh, hello. Is theater. You know what I mean.

[Pete Holmes]

I know what you mean.

[Taran Killam]

And that, like, I know what you mean.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't actually.

[Taran Killam]

Have you ever seen Hamilton? Everybody knows what Hamilton is. But if you've seen Hamilton, a lot of people still haven't because there's only 1300 tickets every day and it's in New York. Right. Unless there's two.

[Pete Holmes]

But no, it wasn't quite right.

[Taran Killam]

I think you should leave as like streaming kids on their phone. Like, it's happening everywhere.

[Pete Holmes]

It's everywhere.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

The similarity is. What I noticed and learned from oh, hello. Is there was a potential to not just be funny, but change the way people talk. And you like. In fact, like, I don't. I don't know how to hear any more about tables. Is like, I could just say that and you'd be like, that sounds like a Tim Robinson joke. You know what I mean?

[Taran Killam]

I don't.

[Pete Holmes]

You don't.

[Taran Killam]

Because you don't pick up on like, you're saying, I don't know how to

[Pete Holmes]

hear any more about tables.

[Taran Killam]

Oh, well. Oh, hello. Made me. I love that you can do voices.

[Pete Holmes]

Feet to the fire. Oh. Bicycle on wall. Hamburgered sandwich. Like, people who love. Oh, hello. Picked up on the way they talk. Let's put this to bed. Because all I'm saying is, would you agree that Tim Robinson and Zach Canaan, they figured out a way to talk and to, like, just look at the world. That became incredibly infectious, without a doubt.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. And I sort of like my badge of pride with no ownership of it is that I got to kind of see it before it exploded because. Oh, Zach Zack was my roommate his first season. His first and second season was my office roommate on 17. Tim then became our roommate for a minute. And then I got my own office.

[Pete Holmes]

What?

[Taran Killam]

Biggest mistake of my life to leave. No, but their stuff like, oh, my

[Pete Holmes]

God, you were the guy next to the Mr. Hershey pouring the chocolate bars.

[Taran Killam]

And you're like, I'm out of here.

[Pete Holmes]

Mine has a work.

[Taran Killam]

Chocolate will never work.

[Pete Holmes]

Guitar rock is over. And cut to Taran putting his feet up in his dummy office.

[Taran Killam]

Just sad. Just no one coming to knock, was it?

[Pete Holmes]

Is there any truth to that? Do you wish you had kicked kick like real talk?

[Taran Killam]

No, I was very excited to get my own office Okay. I did sort of force the issue because there was definitely like a moment where it was the three of us. And as I remember it, God, I'd love to ask them about this because I haven't thought about it in years. But as I remember it, we're like, how do we jazz up our office? We should get an arcade machine. Haha. And we laugh and we're all, yes. Anding this. I find a decent deal on an NBA Jam machine.

[Pete Holmes]

Great choice.

[Taran Killam]

I pull the trigger, I go like, you know, that's a big machine. Do it.

[Pete Holmes]

It's so is this the punchline?

[Taran Killam]

It's, it's. I mean, well, the punchline.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't want to ruin it.

[Taran Killam]

No. Zach had the punchline.

[Pete Holmes]

That's a four man game.

[Taran Killam]

They had to bring, they had to bring construction up to open the door jam like it was a. From the, from the second I hit click buy everything after that was terrible. But the punchline was. Which is so good. They had to open the door. They had to forget. It was terrible. And if you open that like true NBA Jam machine. Yeah. It's like a Zenith television. A ton of empty space and plywood and one like chipboard. There's like nothing.

[Pete Holmes]

There should be a clown in there

[Taran Killam]

going like, don't tell me. But the punchline was like. After it arrived, it was like we went away for a hiatus. They're like, you had a delivery while you were gone. I'm like, sorry. And then they had a writers meeting and Seth Meyers was like, yeah, I heard about the machine. Everybody's excited. I asked Zach, is it loud? And he said, it's loud enough to be discernible over an arcade full of other games.

[Pete Holmes]

That's a great line. That's a great line.

[Taran Killam]

So funny.

[Pete Holmes]

You'd hear like hadouken, Hadouken.

[Taran Killam]

But then he's on fire. He's on fire. He's heating up Phoenix Sun.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Charles Barkley. That's all I remember. Big head code.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, that was like a Sega. Cuz once you got on Sega.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

Changed everything.

[Pete Holmes]

It was the best. I still, I've like within the past five years, looked up NBA Jam emulator. Like, I just want to play it.

[Taran Killam]

I, I bought microchip, put it in. 60,000 games of your favorite arcades play on one controller. It's joyful. There's one I love called Sunset Riders.

[Pete Holmes]

Wait, this is the emulator.

[Taran Killam]

This, it's on the emulator.

[Pete Holmes]

Can we admit that this is just a Canal street nightmare?

[Taran Killam]

Oh, it's so cheap.

[Pete Holmes]

I know, but who is who? It's like, you know how like the guy who owns like red Tube is making $100 billion and you're like, what is this?

[Taran Killam]

He's just screaming people, what's red tube?

[Pete Holmes]

It's a Mormon website.

[Taran Killam]

Five times a day. I knew it.

[Pete Holmes]

I saw it in your eyes. The way you scanned my organs. They looked at the organs first.

[Taran Killam]

He's got to work with smaller actresses.

[Pete Holmes]

Who told. No, no, don't tell, don't tell, don't tell. Wow. Okay. Wait, wait, wait. Lot going on. I don't want to lose it.

[Taran Killam]

Sure.

[Pete Holmes]

These game thing. I got one from my nephew.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

It was like 70,000 games.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

You know he's not, I've never seen him.

[Taran Killam]

You couldn't. Not in a lifetime.

[Pete Holmes]

We use it.

[Taran Killam]

I'm still too connected to 12 year old Taryn who would be like, you have it at home. You have them all at home, bro.

[Pete Holmes]

When I, I gave it to Wyatt, he was very thrilled.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I love Wyatt. I, I kind of was like, this will be the thing like next Christmas. He'll still have. It's fucking gone. And that is the difference.

[Taran Killam]

Sure.

[Pete Holmes]

And I'm not, I'm not blaming my nephew. I love him. You and I remember.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

This is a cool thing about our generation.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

We remember what it was like the one cartridge going I'd bike to your house just to play NBA Jam.

[Taran Killam]

Sure.

[Pete Holmes]

And now it's all there and all the different versions.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

You want to play snes? You want to play Genesis?

[Taran Killam]

You want to play arcade? You want to play NBA Jam US? You want to play NBA Jam UK?

[Pete Holmes]

You want to play the hacked Street Fighter 2? That some pizza?

[Taran Killam]

Street Fighter Alpha Neurons. Centaur.

[Pete Holmes]

No problem. Street Fighter Elf. Street Street Fighter alf. Street Fighter Willie versus alf.

[Taran Killam]

Huh?

[Pete Holmes]

He throws cats.

[Taran Killam]

A ductic garoukin. Ha. I eat cats. Cat tality. Ha. Ha Duke. Ha Duken.

[Pete Holmes]

You started with the best one.

[Taran Killam]

Now I'm. But I'm trying to beat it.

[Pete Holmes]

I, I know. No, I didn't. I liked everyone that came after I was dead but you. This is the compliment I like to

[Taran Killam]

give to everyone who I interview.

[Pete Holmes]

No, no. I, I, I saved this for the best. The best. We could have taken a four hour break and talked about alf. Street Fighter ii. No one's gonna beat Ha Duken.

[Taran Killam]

Ha Duken. That's fucking good. It's one of my favorite simpsons jokes. Is Sideshow Bob's gonna destroy Mad tv. Mad Magazine headquarters or office.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

And all the writers are in the Conference room. And there's, like, you know, takeout food containers spilled and everything. And one guy goes, I got it. What about Everybody Hates Raymond? The guy goes, well, it took all night, but it was worth it. Perfect.

[Pete Holmes]

With respect, though, Mad Magazine. How old are you?

[Taran Killam]

Do you mind?

[Pete Holmes]

Are you.

[Taran Killam]

I'm.

[Pete Holmes]

Now that you're on a hit NBC

[Taran Killam]

show, do you not talk about. Yeah, I'm ageless. I'm about to turn 44.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Taran Killam]

I don't have a talent. He's writing out 44. If you just put his hand up.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my God.

[Taran Killam]

That's what she's doing.

[Pete Holmes]

Because she's writing your age.

[Taran Killam]

She's writing the safety deposit box.

[Pete Holmes]

It's Michael Douglas, M.D.

[Taran Killam]

maryland.

[Pete Holmes]

He's a doctor now.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Michael Douglas, M.D.

[Taran Killam]

they're like, imagine Doogie Howser, but he did it really old.

[Pete Holmes]

Remember Michael Douglas in Ant Man? And you were like, huh? You know when somebody's so old and they look great, they. But they look kind of, like, too skinny and like, a little, like, I don't know.

[Taran Killam]

I don't know. I want to age gracefully myself, and I struggle with it.

[Pete Holmes]

We're.

[Taran Killam]

Hold on to that. So we're trying to go, like, good for. I go, good for you. The. To me. To me is Michael Douglas in. I guess it's end Game. When it's young Michael Douglas and he's like, there's a delivery, you know, a fake face.

[Pete Holmes]

Look.

[Taran Killam]

You go, whoa.

[Pete Holmes]

Have you seen the YouTube accounts that fix the fake faces?

[Taran Killam]

No.

[Pete Holmes]

They're so good. These kids all should be in Hollywood. And Hollywood, like, just as a rule, is like, no, like, somebody fixed. I've mentioned this a thousand times. Somebody fixed the Irishman. Just a YouTube channel. They made it perfect.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

No one wants to text that to Marty. Marty Supreme. That's what they call him now.

[Taran Killam]

The. The editor guy.

[Pete Holmes]

No, Marty. No. Martin Scorsese is the original Martin.

[Taran Killam]

He's the OG supreme, because nobody likes Shamalay because he hates ballet and opera.

[Pete Holmes]

Marty Supreme. Sh.

[Taran Killam]

Timothy Chalamet as Marty Supreme. Is Marty supreme as Marty Scesi.

[Pete Holmes]

My buddy Pat Walsh has the best. He doesn't do stand up a lot, but he. When he does, he has great bits. And one of them is like when the voiceover guy in the preview is surprised. He's like, Martin Lawrence. Martin Lawrence and Martin Lawrence. It's like when you get a text and it says, maybe Martin Lawrence.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Martin Lawrence.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, we've lost our taste for, like, down the mar. Like, our childhood was only, you know,

[Taran Killam]

what You've done inadvertently is you brought me back around to my original recommendation.

[Pete Holmes]

Cool cat review.

[Taran Killam]

Haha. You clowns.

[Pete Holmes]

Haha. You clowns. What? Tell me everything.

[Taran Killam]

Adult Swim animated show created by Joe Cappa. It's so great. It is basically warped. Home improvement. The 12 minute episodes. It's about three brothers who love their dad. Their mom has recently passed away and all they want to do. And it's this brilliant blend of 90s earnest wholesome plots and dialogue and characters.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Taran Killam]

With like this like dark grotesque satire twist. Just a little twist. Hang on the clip too long like. And it makes me laugh every time. And. And what I love because I. I immediately became obsessed and I did a deep dive and Joe Cappa started animation in 2021 like you. It was like a pandemic passion.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh.

[Taran Killam]

Submitted a short film to Sundance. Animated short film got in. He somehow got recruited to the Adult Swim like training program. Like shorts development program.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. There's a pizza parlor where people hang out and they're like it's the devil. But he owns a laundry.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, exactly. His. He did like a great Jim Carrey one and then he did one that is a Home Improvement spoof. So it's Tim Allen and it's the three Sons. What nobody seems to be talking about is haha, you clowns. Which is very successful. It got picked up for season two and three already. It's so funny. The character design of the suns, they all look the same except they have different colored hair. But they all sound the same, they look the same and they're all the Zachary Ty Bryan design from his Home Improvement short. And the dad is the exact Tim Allen design from this Home Improvement short he did. Wow. So it's literally like Tim. But he does. But they're very different voices.

[Pete Holmes]

Knew the sound. The name of the other son, the non jtt.

[Taran Killam]

He's been in the headlines recently too.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh no. Why?

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, I think a dui. Unfortunately. I know.

[Pete Holmes]

Still, when you said that, I thought it was way worse.

[Taran Killam]

Why do we fall?

[Pete Holmes]

What about they learn.

[Taran Killam]

Why do we fall?

[Pete Holmes]

To learn to get back up so that we learn to get back up again.

[Taran Killam]

Okay, great.

[Pete Holmes]

And why is that little kid never on the show?

[Taran Killam]

Because he just wants to watch the world burn. No, wait. Oh, you weren't in it anymore. Okay, sorry, sorry, sorry.

[Pete Holmes]

My favorite. My favorite dark knight, Michael Caine.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

You have to say. You don't have to say this Christian Bale, but the line is you still haven't given up on me. You still haven't given up on Me, Alfred.

[Taran Killam]

You still haven't given up on me, Alfred?

[Pete Holmes]

Never.

[Taran Killam]

A. It's so good.

[Pete Holmes]

Do you want to do it? Cuz it feels so good to do it.

[Taran Killam]

Sure, sure, sure.

[Pete Holmes]

You still haven't given up on me, have you? Never.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, there's a little. My memory is there outside. There's a little. Never telegraphs I'm gonna. Dang it.

[Pete Holmes]

Never. Yeah, my cocaine.

[Taran Killam]

Great.

[Pete Holmes]

You know my cocaine. Yeah, but what a.

[Taran Killam]

It's great.

[Pete Holmes]

Like beer can. Say beer can in an English accent. You just said bacon in a Jamaican accent.

[Taran Killam]

You haven't heard that one. Don't. Don't force me into appropriation. Please don't do that.

[Pete Holmes]

That's so funny. Fred Armisen. Mm. Was on Conan, and he was like,

[Taran Killam]

I can do any accent, but he's sober now.

[Pete Holmes]

Wait, what?

[Taran Killam]

He was on Conan.

[Pete Holmes]

He's off it now.

[Taran Killam]

He's off.

[Pete Holmes]

He's kicked Conan.

[Taran Killam]

Okay, great.

[Pete Holmes]

It's hard.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, it's hard.

[Taran Killam]

Every day's a strange.

[Pete Holmes]

He's doing Leno for a while, too.

[Taran Killam]

Oh, God.

[Pete Holmes]

Just lines of Leno. It kept budgeting. What I'm saying.

[Taran Killam]

The decomposing fox.

[Pete Holmes]

He was decomposing fox. Conan o'. Brien.

[Taran Killam]

Fred Armisen. What, you've never seen it? Oh, it's one of the best.

[Pete Holmes]

I mean, I thought you were just roasting me.

[Taran Killam]

Fred Armisen is perfect to me.

[Pete Holmes]

Sure.

[Taran Killam]

My favorite sketches, my favorite bits I've ever seen are.

[Pete Holmes]

No, he's an anomaly. He's also unbothered by it. You know how comedy people are kind of like, I don't want to. I don't. I don't feel like doing it. He's fine.

[Taran Killam]

I just want to play music sometimes, too, you know? He's just the best.

[Pete Holmes]

He's right there.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

He's not like, let me get it. He's right there.

[Taran Killam]

Yes, yes.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm like, let me get it. Give me four hours of silence, and I'll be ready to recharge the battery. He's like, huh?

[Taran Killam]

Batteries are cool.

[Pete Holmes]

I asked him. I was like, on Portlandia, every sketch hinges on you. I'm not saying Carrie isn't amazing. She is. But often it hinges on him being in the mood to, like, fuck around.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And just be like, riff and go. He's like, I don't mind.

[Taran Killam]

Yes. It's fine. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's what they pay me. It's great. Who cares? Couldn't believe it.

[Pete Holmes]

Could. I can't believe I get to do this. I'm like, so true. Seems Exhausting. I wish I could do more.

[Taran Killam]

It's just funny.

[Pete Holmes]

I mean, I love him.

[Taran Killam]

I love him. And he. Yeah, he does a decomposing fox thing. That's like. You got it.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, the. The fast version.

[Taran Killam]

Fast version of like on a nature documentary. Decomposing.

[Pete Holmes]

That's great. He's kind of doing it though.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm not taking it away from Fred,

[Taran Killam]

but his is even more better. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

It's fun to do. That's like a party game. Everyone do a decomposing fox. We do acting games in our house and I reckon. Are you a game person?

[Taran Killam]

Big time.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

Just did Blood on the Clock Tower two nights ago. It's great. That's so fun. It's mafia, but everybody's got a different role kind of thing. Everybody's in on it, everybody plays.

[Pete Holmes]

Did we do that? I don't. We like. I never want to. All I'm saying is I don't think there's any way to like make this into a real board game. And I think you'll agree. Okay, but we just do acting games and we don't do them to like win. It's just fun. Like you. I do never. And like everyone do never. It's like fun to do it and like we do different ones. Like you take a sip, like imagine you're sober and you're at a party and I give you this drink. It's accidentally. It is alcoholic.

[Taran Killam]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

But you've been thinking about drinking again.

[Taran Killam]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

So you drink it. I want to see the surprise that it's alcohol. Then I want to see the non verbal decision to not tell anyone. It's pretty simple. Seems darker than it is. Ready?

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

Action.

[Taran Killam]

Good to see you, man. Thank you so much. Thank you. It was funny. I thought of you because I. Sorry. I thought of you the other day because.

[Pete Holmes]

Can't celebrate it enough.

[Taran Killam]

I can't celebrate it enough. It's still going. We were at Gelson's and we were by the nuts and our last conversation about hazelnut. Do you remember that?

[Pete Holmes]

I remember.

[Taran Killam]

What was the thing you said.

[Pete Holmes]

It's not actually. It's not actually in the way that white chocolate isn't.

[Taran Killam]

That's what it was. That's what it was. That's what it was. Not actually. And it needs to be. Yeah, it needs the chocolate partnership. That's what I'm remembering.

[Pete Holmes]

Ah, Duken.

[Taran Killam]

Oh, Duken. I don't live on Melmac.

[Pete Holmes]

He's doing the I don't live on

[Taran Killam]

Melmac anymore Elf yoga. Flame. He's Dulcine. Yoga flame. You made us a dinner, alf. Perfect. You win. Now you win. What did you do to the car?

[Pete Holmes]

Oh my.

[Taran Killam]

Perfect.

[Pete Holmes]

Ten. Let's see. Continue. Screen.

[Taran Killam]

Good. Continue.

[Pete Holmes]

Japan. Melmac. It's just. I could just do this for nine years. Okay. So. Haha, you clowns.

[Taran Killam]

Haha, you clowns. It's so good. All the brothers, they all talk like this. Hold on. We're talking about our dad, right? I just want to make sure I get that straight. I appreciate you. I'm pretty sure I ordered the bourbon bacon burger. Appreciate you. Careful, careful. That plate there. Preston's pretty hot. Oh my God. So wonderful. It's so addicted. Like speaking to emulating a voicing that like.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

I immediately became obsessed. My buddy Elliot turned me onto it and he's like, I think you're gonna love it. And he was right. And I. Yeah. I have. This is something I don't do. So this is I think the best compliment of the show. There's. I think 10. There's 10 episodes, 12 minutes each. I've watched the whole season three or four times.

[Pete Holmes]

You just can't.

[Taran Killam]

It's just the little weird nuances that their. Wilson, like the home improvement. They're Wilson.

[Pete Holmes]

You can only see the bottom.

[Taran Killam]

Real life. No, it's this real life gold winning like Olympian, professional women's pool player. Like she's a real person in real life. Which I didn't know when I first started watching the show, but in my deep dive found out and she just like constantly like name drops, Hollywood celebrities she's dated or knows whenever. But also kind of giving advice to the brothers. It's so wonderful.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm in the 90s, those shows.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. It captures. And that was the connections that it captures an essence.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, we're back to Wyatt playing that.

[Taran Killam]

Wyatt not playing the thing because he's too busy correcting the Irishman faces.

[Pete Holmes]

It is him.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. You did.

[Pete Holmes]

You folded that all together in a way that it needed to be. And I. I'm not joking. Thank you for giving that. I think we're done. No, I. There's so many things that won't make sense unless you had without. Like, here's everything.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

It only works for us.

[Taran Killam]

I remember the first time my kids saw a commercial.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh my God. What is the airplane?

[Taran Killam]

Blew my mind.

[Pete Holmes]

That sign up for WI on the airplane.

[Taran Killam]

What? Really? Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, what. Tell me.

[Taran Killam]

Because we cut the cord before they were even born. I think like we were early to the Netflix thing. Yeah. Early to the Apple TV and then I think that you did for Apple

[Pete Holmes]

TV for a couple of years.

[Taran Killam]

Remember?

[Pete Holmes]

Never know when you didn't get it. When it first came out.

[Taran Killam]

First gen, we were. We've always. Our hub has always been the little black hockey puff.

[Pete Holmes]

But what about when it was silver? Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

100. We're Mac people through and through. And. And I only just got like a really good, like PC because I'm curious about Stream games and stuff. All the. All the PC games.

[Pete Holmes]

You're getting a Steam.

[Taran Killam]

Steam. Steam. I didn't get a Steam deck. I got like a computer. Oh, yeah. Titan Quest 2. Love it. Really love it.

[Pete Holmes]

Is that the one where you're giants?

[Taran Killam]

This is like a top scroller. Like Diablo. You ever play Diablo? Where you think it's that, but it's all Greek mythology and you can kind of combine different, like, masteries and you

[Pete Holmes]

glad that we live in a time where I don't go, so you're a virgin. That was our whole childhood.

[Taran Killam]

I remember said Diablo.

[Pete Holmes]

But like Greek mythology.

[Taran Killam]

So you've never touched a titty.

[Pete Holmes]

Aren't you glad we don't live? Aren't you glad I didn't say banana here?

[Taran Killam]

I'm gonna blow your mind. I think we're so divided because half the country still does live in that.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, so you're a virgin.

[Taran Killam]

I think of that sort of fear or judge what is unknown to you or what is foreign to you.

[Pete Holmes]

No, you're not wrong. I remember I was doing a joke about Lululemon and I was like, I have a Lululemon jacket.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And I think it says something about me. And a girl in the front goes, you gay? And I was like, oh, oh, yeah. I. I live in my own climate. He do exist.

[Taran Killam]

He does exist.

[Pete Holmes]

Skyland is not a myth. What was yours?

[Taran Killam]

Eminem. Santa Claus commercial.

[Pete Holmes]

They do exist.

[Taran Killam]

He does exist. They do exist.

[Pete Holmes]

So Santa Claus.

[Taran Killam]

Yes. The myth toy giver number one. Who lives without creatures. Yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And reindeer.

[Taran Killam]

And flew there. Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

And, like, doesn't need to eat, doesn't sleep. Visits every house.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

Sees a talking Eminem and faints.

[Taran Killam]

Loses his mind.

[Pete Holmes]

Which my friend and I. Sorry.

[Taran Killam]

We're going to get back to anthropomorphic food.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Taran Killam]

Is Santa's threshold.

[Pete Holmes]

He can't take it. He can talk to the reindeer.

[Taran Killam]

He's a. He's a jolly guy.

[Pete Holmes]

He's jolly.

[Taran Killam]

His relationship to food.

[Pete Holmes]

That's the complication.

[Taran Killam]

Do you know he's like, I've murdered so many animals. Can talk and snowman can sing. But if my Chocolate blinks back at me. I'm gonna lose my shit.

[Pete Holmes]

Very good.

[Taran Killam]

Ho.

[Pete Holmes]

It's hard to do a ho ho. Oh, that sounds like a true laugh.

[Taran Killam]

It sounds awful. Like an authentic.

[Pete Holmes]

There have to be Santa classes where they're like, guys, it's not ho ho

[Taran Killam]

ho ho ho ho.

[Pete Holmes]

That is excellent.

[Taran Killam]

Thank you very much.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, you can't even do three. Three gives you away phony. The beard is being pulled. This episode is brought to you by Quince. You know, I'm always trying to simplify things. I like a nice, clean, simple life, especially when it comes to my wardrobe. I don't want a million options in my closet making a clutter. I just want a few nice, beautiful pieces that actually work, that I'll actually wear. And that's why I've been loving quints. They make everyday essentials that fit, feel great and actually last. Like lightweight cashmere sweaters, which I have. It's the first thing I got. Short sleeve Mongolian cashmere polos, linen shorts, linen pants, solid T shirts which are amazing, made of 100% Pima cotton. All the stuff you're reaching for anyway just made better. The reason they can do that is Quint works directly with top factories and cuts out the middleman. So you're not paying for a brand markup or fancy stores. Just high quality, quality, really great clothes. That cashmere sweater was Val's choice. She picked it, I wore it. I was like, I'm not going to wear this. It felt so good. I've worn it to the extreme and she absolutely loves it. And. And it didn't cost a fortune. Honestly. Stop over complicating your wardrobe. You don't need more clothes, you just need better ones. So right now go to quint.com weirdo for free shipping and 365 day returns. That's a full year to build your wardrobe and love it. And you will now available in Canada too. Don't keep settling. For clothes that don't last, go to Quince Q U I n c e.com weirdo for free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com weirdo this episode is brought to you by Factor. It's short season and if you're like me, that means eating healthy starts to feel like less of an optional activity. And for me, Factor has been the easiest way to stop using a busy schedule. And as an excuse. These are fully prepared meals designed by dietitians and crafted by chefs that are delicious, healthy and ready in about two minutes. No planning, no cooking, no cleanup. I like the plant based options because they use real ingredients, real veggies, whole foods, healthy fats, none of the junk. That means no refined sugars, no artificial sweeteners and no refined seed oils. But they have tons of variety so you can find the right one for you. Over 100 rotating meals each week. You got high protein, calorie, smart Mediterranean, GLP1 support, even ready to eat salads. They also have options if you're getting back into a workout routine and want to stay on track. Everything's fresh, never frozen and it actually makes sticking to your goals doable and taste fantastic. I use this and you should too. So head to factor meals.com weirdo50off. That's the word. Weirdo50off and use code weirdo50off to get 50 50% and free breakfast for a year offer only valid for new Factor customers with code and qualifying auto renewing subscription purchase. Make healthier eating easy with Factor. This episode is brought to us by our friends at Magic Mind. You know, I'm constantly drinking and obsessed and talking about Magic Mind. It's like Gatorade is for athletes. Magic Mind is creator aid for creators. It has 12 functional ingredients, things like Matcha for a little bit of caffeine, Nootropics for focus and adaptogens to help fight off stress. So it gets you right in that sweet spot. Stimulated but also calm. Nootropics to help you focus. Don't think wired, think dialed in. On average people say they get about 30% more done. It even fights off procrastination, brain fog, fatigue and some ADD type stuff. Take it from me, that is true. And after a few days in a row it's even easier to to slip into that flow state when you drink it. That flow state that we all chase. And here's the best part. There's a money back guarantee so if it doesn't work for you, you get a free refund. They also have Magic Mind free which is caffeine free. Which if I'm being honest, I thought that was dumb. And now I'm obsessed. Right around 2, 3 o' clock when I want more brain power but not the caffeine that disrupts my sleep, I take a Magic Mind free. They also make Magic Mind Max which has more caffeine than the usual but which I'm being honest, that's sometimes what I need. And I take one of those. They have something for everybody. They even have Magic Mind for your sleep. Go to magicmind.com weird and use the promo code weird at checkout that's magicmind.com weird. For 20% off your first order, just use promo code weird at checkout. Okay. I had a million things. I forget what it was.

[Taran Killam]

What were we just talking about?

[Pete Holmes]

It all comes back to Wyatt and his video games.

[Taran Killam]

They do exist.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh. Oh. My friend Matt McCarthy, he killed me.

[Taran Killam]

We were on the road and I'm a ghost.

[Pete Holmes]

And now I'm a ghost.

[Taran Killam]

Sorry.

[Pete Holmes]

He showed me a clip from the movie Jack and Jill, the Adam Sandman movie.

[Taran Killam]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

Where the. He directs a commercial with Al Pacino. Do you know this?

[Taran Killam]

Yes. The dance Duncano. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

[Pete Holmes]

So Al Pacino is rapping. He goes in, they go. Al Pacino goes, I'm not Al Pacino. I'm Dunkachino. And they go, dunka dunka dunka dunka dunkin dunkin chino. And there's dancing. Dunkachinos.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

And he's drinking. He's like, ask for me, Al Pacino. It's like three minutes of this. Yeah, it's a. It's rapping and dancing.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

They're watching on a flat screen. Cut to Adam, the director. Sandler, the director of the commercial, and Al Pacino. Al Pacino goes, burn this. No one can ever see this.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Matt goes, break down that logic for me. Al thought it was going to be good until he saw it. Like he was on the set.

[Taran Killam]

I have to be vulnerable and I have to. I've not seen Jack and Jack.

[Pete Holmes]

No, neither have I.

[Taran Killam]

Is Al Pacino.

[Pete Holmes]

Al Pacino in the film, he's Al Pacino.

[Taran Killam]

Okay. And he's like, I'm back.

[Pete Holmes]

He's in it. He's playing himself. Yes. He was in a commercial and he thought it was good. He was like, this will cut together.

[Taran Killam]

Nice.

[Pete Holmes]

Then he saw it and was like, it didn't work. Yeah, he would have. He would have walked up the set.

[Taran Killam]

You know what? What? Al Pacino trusts the process.

[Pete Holmes]

He. I like that. He had intense faith in that director. He knows.

[Taran Killam]

He's like, I've seen what kids can do to the friggin Irishman. They fix Bobby's face.

[Pete Holmes]

He calls him Bobby.

[Taran Killam]

Bobby.

[Pete Holmes]

Bobby got rid of that big fat peach claw.

[Taran Killam]

It's always that. It's always him. And he. The big fat.

[Pete Holmes]

Have you heard that they cut out in Heat? This whole plot that that guy's on coke. Have you heard this?

[Taran Killam]

That Al is on coke.

[Pete Holmes]

Al's character is on coke.

[Taran Killam]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

And his performance is a coked up guy.

[Taran Killam]

Interesting.

[Pete Holmes]

And then they cut it out.

[Taran Killam]

Seems Manic and now he just seems

[Pete Holmes]

like a really jazzed guy.

[Taran Killam]

Ye. Great ass. It.

[Pete Holmes]

Maybe he's like, they took out the hole. It's the context.

[Taran Killam]

It's so wild.

[Pete Holmes]

It's not easy being cheesy.

[Taran Killam]

No.

[Pete Holmes]

That's another New Yorker cartoon. Chester Cheetah on the couch. With my help, I think we can make it a little easier to be cheesy.

[Taran Killam]

Done. Great.

[Pete Holmes]

These are good.

[Taran Killam]

Make a book.

[Pete Holmes]

We're back. Zach. I know, I know. That's nice. Back to Zach.

[Taran Killam]

Zach and Tim. And Tim and Tim.

[Pete Holmes]

Because Zach was the assistant. Assistant. That's how I know Zach Cannon.

[Taran Killam]

Right. He was. He was on staff.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, he. When I knew him, he was getting his start.

[Taran Killam]

I see.

[Pete Holmes]

And I was. I'm not just saying this because he's huge now and amazing and. And been revealed to be as talented.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

When he was just getting, like, squeaking in a cartoon every month or two, I was like, these are incredible. Like, he really had, like, such a weird, interesting voice. And it's like, you know, basketball. Gimme, gimme, gimme the ball. Because I'm gonna dunk it. That. When we watch it now.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

There's no. You know, they play those audio clips and they're like. And then they go. He's saying, green eggs and ham. And then you listen to it again. It goes, green eggs and ham.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, sure.

[Pete Holmes]

That's like Tim and Zach.

[Taran Killam]

What was that one? Like, narrow. What. What am I doing?

[Pete Holmes]

What is.

[Taran Killam]

This girl is like, I think.

[Pete Holmes]

And then they tell you what it

[Taran Killam]

is, and it's like, you can. People hear two different things, and which

[Pete Holmes]

one they prime you with is what you hear. So similarly, sometimes you need to. What I'm saying is I can watch that Tim Robinson sketch. Gimme, gimme, gimme the ball. Because I'm going to dunk it.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

And I die.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. So funny.

[Pete Holmes]

But I'm also probably, if I'm being honest, one of the people that saw it when it first came out and was like, that's fine.

[Taran Killam]

Sure, sure.

[Pete Holmes]

But now that I know him.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Because there's something going on with Tim and Zach that they're like such a. It's like such a. They're in the library, they're at a different table, and they have their own thing, and you need to be, like, folded into it. And then when you are. I think that's part of the fun. You understand what they're about. And now you get. Gimme, gimme the ball. They're not trying to be funny in the same way that Will Ferrell playing with the cat toys was being funny. It's like beyond anti. Anti humor, but it's actually circled back to just being humor again.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Does this make sense?

[Taran Killam]

I hear you. I hear you. My relationship to it is wholly unique because I was there for week one when Zach was hired and knew his relationship with the Lampoon guys. And he put me in his sketch that he got on first week and it was out like Baldwin foxhole thing is really funny.

[Pete Holmes]

Decomposing foxhole.

[Taran Killam]

It was. That's pretty fun. It's like, like, tell my wife. Tell my. And like it sillier and sillier things to tell my wife. So clean, so simple, so great. So he, like, established himself immediately. To me, Tim was. Was always the funniest. Like when he came in, you're like, oh, you're next level funny. That was. It was never really in question. And the.

[Pete Holmes]

Even when he was at SNL struggling 100%.

[Taran Killam]

And the struggle of it is so, like, you know, undefinable and circumstantial. And why and how did the show not cultivate it? And is it. Is it not for him? Because he did this sketch where he was playing a substitute teacher. And I think it might have been a Second City sketch that he brought with him. Maybe not, but he was a substitute teacher returning for the second day. And he clearly had had a really hard day the first day, and the kids just mocked him, like out the door, really embarrassing, really bad. And so he shows up and he's wearing a leather jacket and he's like, come for his redemption. He's like, no, no. Yeah, I thought yesterday pretty cornball says some pretty big things about me, but I'm here to show you the real me. And he, like, comes in with all the confidence in the world, and it's funny right away, but when Tim did it at the. At the table read, he. He brought this folding table and he goes, now let me. Let me shoot you eyes about. And he leaves on the table and he falls through the table and he immediately loses all cool. Even worse. And it's him. And then in that Tim yell way, like, oh, God. Oh, a spider went in the R. Jesus. You know, so good and dying, laughing, just tears. And he had a sketch like that in my memory, like at least once every third table read, at least like, and was the best. He was.

[Pete Holmes]

No, that sketch you just talked about didn't make here.

[Taran Killam]

No, didn't. Didn't get picked, I think.

[Pete Holmes]

And who cares? We. We could speculate, but it just It's. Some things just went goofy. Sometimes something goes by.

[Taran Killam]

Sometimes. Yeah. Some. My. My two cents on it from being through. Through it is there's. There's a. There becomes a hive mentality. Tendency for the tone of the show, and that's how you define the tone. And who are. Who are the top dogs? Who are we relying on? And what is the sensibility there? And then you're trying to make a melody out of it. You know, not to get too. But. And what sounds like a sharp. And what sounds like a minor note.

[Pete Holmes]

Like

[Taran Killam]

oversimplification. And obviously very generous and gentle in. In trying to dissect why it is the way it is.

[Pete Holmes]

That's a good. Explain it. Great.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, I. I did. You know, I really, like. I spent six years there. I didn't. I never got the vibe of, like, they're. They're. They want everybody to succeed.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

You know.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. They're not. I've heard the same report. It's not cruel.

[Taran Killam]

No.

[Pete Holmes]

Nobody was trying to take Tim's legs out. But you're trying to make a melody. I mean, you could say the same thing about Mulaney to a certain extent. He had his stuff. But then, like, coming back as a host, now he's the tone.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. Yeah. Right.

[Pete Holmes]

And Tim doesn't host, though.

[Taran Killam]

No, that's not kind of a thing yet.

[Pete Holmes]

I think I've heard that he's.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. Not interested. Maybe.

[Pete Holmes]

Pretty cool. I know you guys heard a lot of stuff. It was so good.

[Taran Killam]

Are you sure? Are you sure? Come on. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

You've been in a mall.

[Taran Killam]

I remember Seth saying pretty early on, he's like, I hope Tim becomes famous enough that your impression will become worthwhile.

[Pete Holmes]

That is great. That's how I feel about Mike Birbiglia.

[Taran Killam]

I. I got out. I was. I was on a different podcast. Forgive me. I still love you, baby.

[Pete Holmes]

Just bleep it up.

[Taran Killam]

And it was called I still love you, baby. Kyle and Beck asked me to do a Mike Birbigli impression because it was about doing impressions.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Taran Killam]

And I was pretty proud of it because I. I don't know that I've met Mike or maybe in passing.

[Pete Holmes]

Can't wait to hear it.

[Taran Killam]

I was very proud of this.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

So my wife comes home and. And says, I want to order takeout. And I'm like, I've been home all day. Take me out. That was it.

[Pete Holmes]

This silence. Isn't it not working?

[Taran Killam]

Okay, okay.

[Pete Holmes]

It's funny. I have a very different Birbiglia, but mine's an exaggeration. I feel like you're.

[Taran Killam]

You know each other and you've spent time together. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

But it's like, we probably talked about this last time you were on.

[Taran Killam]

I saw the old. The old man in the pool here in la. So good.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah.

[Taran Killam]

So great. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. You got a real one guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's it. That's it.

[Pete Holmes]

My wife says, get me taken. I'm like, I've been inside all day. There's something. Take me out.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Mike taught me so much about comedy. I give him. I give him a hard time. That's so dumb. We're like best friends. I don't have to say it. Gave him a hard time.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Will you do your bread just to delight me, Please? Just. I. I hate to pimp.

[Taran Killam]

You're Mike. You love Mike. You would like a friends. Sorry.

[Pete Holmes]

I know it's not morning rain.

[Taran Killam]

I love when people love it.

[Pete Holmes]

I would do it. If we were at coffee. I would say, please, you love. I can't. Why?

[Taran Killam]

What is very good. But it's. But. But not everybody goes like. They're like, that's not.

[Pete Holmes]

A lot of people don't know what he sounds like.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

F1 was not for me.

[Taran Killam]

Agreed. And I.

[Pete Holmes]

It's so weird.

[Taran Killam]

Just. My mom came over yesterday to catch up and talk for 20 minutes about how much she loves it.

[Pete Holmes]

That's why I brought it up. I don't like shitting on other people's work. Your mom reached out to me. No, the reason I brought it up is I found out it's been nominated for all these awards.

[Taran Killam]

People are upset. I loved it. Some of the dialogue I couldn't get through. Like, you look a little bit like a guy who used to manage me. Was he very handsome and very good at racing cars? Kind of a pain in my butt, actually. How are you, brother? You know like that thing where I'm just like.

[Pete Holmes]

I literally have a clip on social media. Yeah, Social media. Where I explained to Vin Diesel, insult, insult, hug. Meaning I did that interview 10 years ago where I was like, kind of

[Taran Killam]

making sure is maybe the best version. Yes. Yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Making light of the genre that Vin is in.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

Which is like, look at that ugly sack.

[Taran Killam]

You almost had me. You never even had your car. Double shifting, Granny clutching when you should have been double shifting. Ask any racer, any real racer. Live your life a quarter mile at a time. What are you smiling about? Dude, I almost had you. You almost had me? You never even had your car. Love that Movie. I love those movies. That is like the least guilty of guilty pleasures in my life.

[Pete Holmes]

Really?

[Taran Killam]

And it's.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't like that they use so much green screen. Look, full respect to the Fast team, but when somebody's trying to fishtail their Dodge Charger to knock a thing off a cliff. Fine, but can we do some of it? Practically?

[Taran Killam]

Respect. All due respect.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, Please.

[Taran Killam]

You're a fucking idiot and you don't get it.

[Pete Holmes]

That's what this is. You're gay. You just said you're gay. Oh, really?

[Taran Killam]

You don't know Fast X, the sequel, which comes out in another two years?

[Pete Holmes]

Really?

[Taran Killam]

Did you not see it? It ends on this insane cliffhanger and the movie doesn't come out till 2028. I think it's amazing. Part of the. Part two or whatever.

[Pete Holmes]

Somebody look.

[Taran Killam]

It's wild.

[Pete Holmes]

All respect to Vinnie D. When I was about to interview him.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Conan.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

They said, please just know. Because we're a comedy show. Just know. There's no. Like, these are movies. Don't. Don't be like, yeah, yeah. So popcorn, movie, none of that.

[Taran Killam]

No, this don't.

[Pete Holmes]

And I like that.

[Taran Killam]

I like cinema.

[Pete Holmes]

That's how you should be if you're gonna make 200 of them. That's your whole life. It's like Don Draper.

[Taran Killam]

His earnestness is important to it.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah.

[Taran Killam]

It's important to it.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah. It doesn't work. It's like when you do birdemic. Birdemic versus, like the room. You know when they try and do a bad movie.

[Taran Killam]

Oh, well, I don't know. Birdemic.

[Pete Holmes]

Birdemic. It's called birdemic, right? Yeah, it's called birdemic. Sharknado.

[Taran Killam]

Are you saying birdly Mike. Mike Birdemic.

[Pete Holmes]

I go outside, there's pigeons everywhere. I'm holding a pizza.

[Taran Killam]

It's so good.

[Pete Holmes]

Of course I am. I have a pizza. It took a slice. I'm like, that's fine.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

There's always one giveaway slice. He has these theories with a coupon. There's one slice that has more pepperoni. It looks like the pepperonis, like they're getting ready for a storm. That's my slice.

[Taran Killam]

Oh, no. So good. So good.

[Pete Holmes]

F1. Not for me. When it gets nominated and when people like it, I go. I get a little bit of a lonely feeling when I'm like, that scene where they play poker and it reveals that he let the kid win. I'm like, there's a certain middle aged guy porn. You know what I mean? It's porn. But what's that?

[Taran Killam]

Red tube.

[Pete Holmes]

Red tube. But you know what I mean, where it's like the old guy did know what he was doing.

[Taran Killam]

Sure, sure, sure.

[Pete Holmes]

And like, as a middle aged guy, I'm like, we deserve better. It can't just be like this guy put a can of oil in there. He didn't take it out. And the young whip smart kid who's not quite cocky enough for me to hate.

[Taran Killam]

Yes. That's what my mom loved about it. She really broke down the emotional journey of that. My mom is a family therapist, psychologist. She, she loved that. The, the sort of like brazen arrogance of youth.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

That what really separates, you know, men from boys is the ability to feel shame and to know, admit when you're wrong and get better.

[Pete Holmes]

I like that.

[Taran Killam]

And that he has the mom. The mom.

[Pete Holmes]

I walked out. So I don't know.

[Taran Killam]

Okay. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

You also walked out. I just, I walked out with great pleasure. Yeah, I walked out. And if somebody, if they had paused the movie and said, pete, would you like to do 40 minutes on why you're leaving? I would have been Fred Armisen.

[Taran Killam]

I would have been like, sure, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. That be great, right?

[Taran Killam]

Great cars, they're weird. What's with the car? They go fast enough. They're already fast. Have you seen normal? Normal School zone? That's fast.

[Pete Holmes]

35.

[Taran Killam]

You can go 35 miles. Why don't we find out who does 35 the best and you judge on things on like 10 and 2. These are, you know, important lessons that we forget.

[Pete Holmes]

Who goes 35 the best is just a little more. Do pit again. Because I want to talk about it.

[Taran Killam]

All right. They came to me, there was a script. They said, this one, it's you doing your thing. I said, I don't have a thing. Duh. They said, it's you, but you're doing fast. F1 Racing. I didn't know about it.

[Pete Holmes]

I know.

[Taran Killam]

Wine. Delicious. Very good. Sommelier. They said, let's put you in a car.

[Pete Holmes]

None of this is fake. This isn't fake. I'm so happy.

[Taran Killam]

Good. Thanks.

[Pete Holmes]

Because. And I know we did it last time. Forgive it. Seems like you're okay with it. That's why I'm following that thread. When you don't know some. When people, if you do that for anyone and they say that doesn't sound like Brad Pitt to me. They've never listened to him talking. And I don't think they do. I think they. He's just so magnanimous in like nine ways that how he's talking is kind of like lost. It doesn't really matter. Yeah, but you're doing it.

[Taran Killam]

I'm. I am genuinely obsessed with, like. He is my movie star.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, that's why. That's why F1 was disappointing in high

[Taran Killam]

school and college for Fight Club. 12 Monkeys 7. Like. Like. He is. He is a movie. He is what it is to be a movie.

[Pete Holmes]

Jesse James.

[Taran Killam]

I like Jesse James.

[Pete Holmes]

That's his favorite movie.

[Taran Killam]

That's his favorite. Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

His favorite film that he's been in.

[Taran Killam]

Got it.

[Pete Holmes]

I hope he hasn't updated.

[Taran Killam]

I'm technically in a movie with him in 12 Years a Slave.

[Pete Holmes]

12 monkeys a year.

[Taran Killam]

12 monkeys a year as a slave.

[Pete Holmes]

I didn't. I'm trying to blend two 12 monkeys. Free.

[Taran Killam]

Free.

[Pete Holmes]

Wait, what do you mean you're in that movie?

[Taran Killam]

Me and Brad Pitt are in 12 Years a Slave. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I didn't know that.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Wait, did we talk about.

[Taran Killam]

Maybe treat me a little more spec from now on, huh?

[Pete Holmes]

Did you meet him?

[Taran Killam]

Never got. I've never gotten to meet him. The closest I came was Joe Wright, the director of. What is the Kiran Atonement? Director Joe Wright. Is that the director? Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

Anyway.

[Taran Killam]

He is the director of the Brad Pitt, Calvin Klein commercials where he's in black and white. We're all amorphous floating stars. How do we get there? Do we want to smell me? And we parodied those on snl and Joe Wright was there that weekend.

[Pete Holmes]

Did you do it?

[Taran Killam]

I got to meet him. Yeah. They went on. It went on.

[Pete Holmes]

You did Brad in that commercial?

[Taran Killam]

Yes. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

God.

[Taran Killam]

And Joe Ryan's like. I thought it was brilliant. It's great. Oh, I think you'll have a great laugh. No, you nailed s in the shot. I loved it. Loved it. You know, Very nice. Very polite.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my God.

[Taran Killam]

But that's the closest we've. We've come.

[Pete Holmes]

What? What. What do you. I don't want to steal it.

[Taran Killam]

You can steal it.

[Pete Holmes]

I know. No, no, no. And any. Anyone that ever heard me do it. But I don't even. The touchstone. What is the touchstone? Boo.

[Taran Killam]

Is that's 12 monkeys kind of. And out of my chair. You want to escape. That's saying. That's very sane.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

I can help you. Monkey.

[Pete Holmes]

Monkey.

[Taran Killam]

Like he's doing that. You know, it's that which I remember

[Pete Holmes]

at the time, people being like, it was too much.

[Taran Killam]

So good.

[Pete Holmes]

Now we love. I loved it then, too.

[Taran Killam]

Unhinged and great. And like. I mean, remember him in True Romance? Like he's Like, I do kind of miss those big swings. And then, like, Interview with a Vampire and Legends of the Fall made him beautiful.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Taran Killam]

Like. And then Fight Club is the perfect balance of, like, kind of weird. But you are the ideal man. You are the what? You are what every man wishes.

[Pete Holmes]

He.

[Taran Killam]

How he saw him.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. And he's a little crazy.

[Taran Killam]

He's a little crazy. He's a little. Sticky feathers. Up yours. Doesn't make you a chicken.

[Pete Holmes]

But he's good at dispelling wisdom. You know what I mean?

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

This is like Hindu cows.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. Yeah. And. And Ocean's 12. 11. 12. I'm trying to get all the twelves in. Apparently, he's done a lot of 12 movies. 12 movies.

[Pete Holmes]

12 Years a Slave. Ocean's 12 Oceans. 12 Monkeys Years.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. 12 Monkeys. Years of Slave. Yeah. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I only do 12. It's like Elvis did a lot of blue stuff.

[Taran Killam]

I have notes on the script. Beautiful story needs to be told.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Taran Killam]

It's missing 12.

[Pete Holmes]

I forgive that this came up last time. I have a theory, and we're gonna. I feel like you're gonna know if it's right. Macaulay Culkin. Yeah. And Brad Pitt talk the same way.

[Taran Killam]

I don't think so.

[Pete Holmes]

There's something similar.

[Taran Killam]

I find help find what's very.

[Pete Holmes]

He's overall, I think so. Over articulate.

[Taran Killam]

But that's Kid him you're talking. Get him.

[Pete Holmes]

Kid him.

[Taran Killam]

They both have. I mean, full lips.

[Pete Holmes]

Do you have a job? Do you have a job?

[Taran Killam]

Uncle Buck?

[Pete Holmes]

Do you have a job?

[Taran Killam]

Ma', am, I'm eight years old. Do you think I'd be here by myself? I don't think so.

[Pete Holmes]

Do it as Brad, please.

[Taran Killam]

Ma', Am, I'm 12 years old. You think I'd be here by myself? I don't think so.

[Pete Holmes]

There's. So I'm standing by my theory that there's something similar. What's another Home Alone line? We got to do another one.

[Taran Killam]

Okay. I'm gonna do this off. Mike K. Okay. I love it so much. I love it so much. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

When he gets reunited with his family after you have kids. Different moment. Well, when I was a kid, I was like, who cares?

[Taran Killam]

I never watched Home Alone Furious until I had children.

[Pete Holmes]

Now you watch it Furious.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. Like, it's the worst father in the dad is. Could give two shit through the whole thing.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

And the first thing he says when they reunited is like, he shames the mom. He's like, yeah, we got that plane. You don't want to wait for. I dumb. He's the worst.

[Pete Holmes]

The face of a dad in a movie in our childhood.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

You know what I mean. Dad couldn't.

[Taran Killam]

What a weird kid. What does he call you? Like what?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

What a funny kid.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah.

[Taran Killam]

No, that's the kid you abandoned.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Taran Killam]

By himself.

[Pete Holmes]

I know.

[Taran Killam]

And you're not sweating one beat of sweat.

[Pete Holmes]

I also noticed that the dad doesn't get on one knee and. Thanks.

[Taran Killam]

Nothing. Fine.

[Pete Holmes]

It's fine.

[Taran Killam]

It makes me angry.

[Pete Holmes]

Me too.

[Taran Killam]

Only 18 states require sex said to be medically accurate. And relationship classes. Let's fix that. I'm Shan, an ASEX certified sex educator

[Pete Holmes]

with a master's in psych. And on my podcast Lovers by Shan,

[Taran Killam]

we make learning about love as mind blowing as making it. Celebrities and fascinating people share an intimate story.

[Pete Holmes]

Then we uncover the lesson for all of us.

[Taran Killam]

Watch Lovers by Shan from Lemonada Media

[Pete Holmes]

on YouTube or listen wherever you like your podcast.

[Julia Louis-Dreyfus]

Hey there, it's Julia Louis Dreyfus. I'm back with a new season of Wiser Than Me, the show where I sit down with remarkable older women and soak up their stories, their humor, and their hard earned wisdom. Every conversation leaves me a little smarter and definitely more inspired. And yes, I'm still calling my 91 year old mom Judy to get her take on it all. Wiser Than Me from lemonada Media is out now, wherever you get your podcasts.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, it's been one hour. That's great.

[Taran Killam]

Just like that. It flies by.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, we don't. We don't. We usually do two hours, but this is your return episode. Yeah, yeah, we're kind of off the hook.

[Taran Killam]

We've had enough.

[Pete Holmes]

No, no, no. I could talk to you forever. I had no sense of how long it's been. Oh, can I say? Yeah, go ahead.

[Taran Killam]

I was checking my thing. Well, I thought it said to 2:30. That's what I was planning for 11 years.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, great. One to two. Yeah. We asked for 90 minutes.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

But anytime. Yeah, we decide.

[Taran Killam]

Great.

[Pete Holmes]

We're done. From now on. You got notes? I want to. I can't. I. It's not normal that I can hear it right in front of my face and. And nothing.

[Taran Killam]

I mean, Adam Ray does a lot of those that are. That, you know. Well, his tone, like his. His Robert Downey is effortless and he creeps into it and I go like, wow. Well, he's doing a thing. And I'm like, he's doing a thing.

[Pete Holmes]

It's like the shape of your jaw is wrong.

[Taran Killam]

Sort of. Yeah, exactly.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Yeah. Something's wrong. Anthropologists will be able to find your skull and go, this guy could do bread. He had the shape. He had the shape of it. So you're with Tim, and did you learn anything from watching them? I mean, like, that is an interesting thing. Sorry to go back to them.

[Taran Killam]

They were great. They were. I mean, always joyful.

[Pete Holmes]

But they didn't know each other. They met each other at snl.

[Taran Killam]

That's correct. So you were there, Tim, to give credit to you? Like, I. I just. I have such admiration and respect for Tim for many reasons, certainly his talent. But this is. Are you sure? Are you sure? Come on. As always, that I thought for a

[Pete Holmes]

minute monsters walked on.

[Taran Killam]

But, like, he was hired as a cast member and deservedly so. And he moves his family. And, like, Tim and I bonded because we were, like, one of three people to have a family. Children, brown beards. To hide our homosexuality. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Beard wives. Your beard wives.

[Taran Killam]

Beard wives. But Tim. Tim, again, like, my first impression, like, this is one of the funniest people, undeniably. And then, like, was. Had the casting taken away and. And. And the show was, you know, wise enough to know, like, obviously there's something. There's. We see the value.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Taran Killam]

And offered him a writing job. And he took it and he took it and he stayed with it, and he was very successful at that. And that's where he and Zach really found their way.

[Pete Holmes]

They. Not. I don't want to say demoted, but Tim was a cast, and then they

[Taran Killam]

made him a writer and he was hired. Just as for the writing staff. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And then. But he's pitching these and nobody wanted. I know. What do we do?

[Taran Killam]

100. But that's the thing. Like, and season one of. I think you should leave. At least every episode has one. They put it to table at SNL sketch in it.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, really?

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. There's a few of them. Yeah. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

He's very interested in, like, people knowing what someone's doing.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

When I watched him. I know you're the guest. I'm just saying we both love him.

[Taran Killam]

Oh, please. Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

I watch him and I'm like, what's so funny is this is a person. Remember when you're a kid and you're like, why are grownups talking this way? And, like. But they don't even know. They've been doing it so long.

[Taran Killam]

They don't know. Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, corporate people on airplanes talk in a certain way. They're not on a conference call, but they'll be like, yeah, let's circle Back on that. And I'm like, tim seems to have that lens for the entire world.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

But he loves when someone's trying to save face. Like your substitute. Or the hot dog. And everyone knows the hot dog guy crashed the wiener mobile.

[Taran Killam]

People who don't know how to challenge their very chat channel their very big feelings.

[Pete Holmes]

Very big feelings. And the jig is up.

[Taran Killam]

So they go to rage.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Taran Killam]

Or they go to sadness.

[Pete Holmes]

And I'm so much. Adam McKay did this pod and he said to me, changed my life. He was like, clowns are to laugh at drunk dads. They have red noses, they have ruddy cheeks and they fall over. And then I watched the Simpsons. Homer is to laugh at our rage. Drunk dads. And now I'm looking at Tim and I'm like, he's also high status idiot. Which is with respect. I'm not talking about my dad. I'm just talking about all dads. That's like a dad. Like, he's angry, but he won't admit why he's angry. And really, he's sad and ashamed, but he'll just double down and be like, are you here just for the zip line? And he's like, he'll do anything. It's a narcissist, too. Yeah, a narcissist can't apologize. This guy can't say, I know I was on the zip line too much.

[Taran Killam]

Right.

[Pete Holmes]

I didn't expect to like it that much. Can I please stay? He'll. Instead, he'll go like, what? What?

[Taran Killam]

Like, are you sure?

[Pete Holmes]

Are you sure? That's. And that is kind of homer.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

That's a homer face.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

That's. Sorry again. Just having fun. Just you guys talking about comedy.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, man.

[Pete Holmes]

Like when podcast first started breaking down before we had to have take on the government. Takes on the government.

[Taran Killam]

I got one. Take mine.

[Pete Holmes]

You can have it. Take my government, please take it. Took me a long time before I got that joke. Take my wife, please. Yeah, yeah. He means my wife, for example. Correct. Like, take my wife. I didn't get it.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, you need a little lead in. You need a little, like, lead into it.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, we don't really say that anymore. We don't go like, take my best friend, please.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Anyway, sorry. I feel like we're done.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't know why. Let me change gears. You're promoting.

[Taran Killam]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's good. That's. That's helpful.

[Pete Holmes]

Snatched the Amy Schumer movie snacks.

[Taran Killam]

Correct.

[Pete Holmes]

And High Times.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

The magazine.

[Taran Killam]

I bring back print Print magazine. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Prince.

[Taran Killam]

Prince.

[Pete Holmes]

The artist formerly known as Prince.

[Taran Killam]

Please bring him back. And probably my favorite musical guest ever. Who?

[Pete Holmes]

Prince.

[Taran Killam]

Prince. Yeah. You were there about Gorillaz this past Saturday and it was interesting. They did, you know, their first and then their newest songs. Have you been to the downtown exhibit? Gorillas exhibit, the house of Kong? It's cool. It's worth. It's really okay. It's worth attending.

[Pete Holmes]

Like what? In what way?

[Taran Killam]

It's the story of them done in a sort of immersive sound design. You know, same same physical structure as a haunted house, but really telling the stories of gorillas and taking him that you into their world.

[Pete Holmes]

That sounds great.

[Taran Killam]

It's awesome.

[Pete Holmes]

That sounds great.

[Taran Killam]

Prince opted out of two songs. He didn't want to do two songs. He wanted to do one seven minute stretch and he did like this medley and he played guitar for the whole thing.

[Pete Holmes]

Like the halftime show.

[Taran Killam]

Yes, it was.

[Pete Holmes]

No.

[Taran Killam]

So sick.

[Pete Holmes]

Prince has a halftime show. Actually, what I'm gonna do is a halftime show. It's coming out better than I thought.

[Taran Killam]

Is this.

[Pete Holmes]

Can you tell I'm trying to do

[Taran Killam]

Prince the Chappelle show kind of.

[Pete Holmes]

It's like Lorne Michaels is like, well, usually the gush does chew. And he goes, right.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. Actually the thing is, Prince. May I call you Prince? I know. You know. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

You don't call Donald Childish Gambino.

[Taran Killam]

Right. But he has. He roared. But he has the Donald option.

[Pete Holmes]

But there's no Prince. There's only one menu item.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

He hands you a menu and it says I did.

[Taran Killam]

I got to shake his hand because I saw the sound check in the live show. And I went, that was when you show up on Thursday. And I just said, it's such an honor. That was incredible. It's so such an honor to me. And he goes, bless you.

[Pete Holmes]

Bless you. Bless you.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

You got a blessing from Prince.

[Taran Killam]

It's sick.

[Pete Holmes]

You know when you see good stuff and you're just like. It just gives you hope.

[Taran Killam]

100 and be inspired.

[Pete Holmes]

And inspiration.

[Taran Killam]

Haha. You clowns. Has inspired me in a way where I'm like, I want to draw more. I felt that way like, like I

[Pete Holmes]

want to because especially the story that he didn't. He wasn't even doing.

[Taran Killam]

It's never too late to start is certainly inspirational. Just the design of the characters is very much in a style that I would draw things in high school. Like, I've gotten better now, but nice. Like so the nostalgic element of the visual images is really fun. Yeah. Has. Yeah. It's great. You got to check and check out Stumble on NBC.

[Pete Holmes]

Edit that out. It's called Snatched. It's an Amy Schumer Goldie Hawn movie. And it's not on NBC.

[Taran Killam]

And they're back.

[Pete Holmes]

And they're back.

[Taran Killam]

They're back.

[Pete Holmes]

It's Snatched more than ever. And Taryn's in it.

[Taran Killam]

He's.

[Pete Holmes]

It's called re. Snatched.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, It's.

[Pete Holmes]

It's called Landing strip. Re. Snatched

[Taran Killam]

for the big fella. That's Brad Pitt from Snatch.

[Pete Holmes]

Don't care for it.

[Taran Killam]

What?

[Pete Holmes]

But I do like killing them softly.

[Taran Killam]

That's.

[Pete Holmes]

Should I give Snatch another try?

[Taran Killam]

Snatched.

[Pete Holmes]

I should watch Snatched. I'm.

[Taran Killam]

I'm. Now the.

[Pete Holmes]

You're livid.

[Taran Killam]

Snatch. Livid is the. Is the guy you're talking about.

[Pete Holmes]

Snatch.

[Taran Killam]

Richie. Snatch. Singular. Snatched is.

[Pete Holmes]

Is Snatched is Amy Schumer.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. Snatches. Great.

[Pete Holmes]

Really?

[Taran Killam]

Such a good soundtrack.

[Pete Holmes]

All I remember is that I didn't know what he was saying. But that's like the fun.

[Taran Killam]

So fun.

[Pete Holmes]

It's the fun. I don't like going anywhere. It's a.

[Taran Killam]

Job's done. See.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't know.

[Taran Killam]

I'll just. With you. Come and take. For the big fella.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't know what you're saying.

[Taran Killam]

Gotta get a caravan. Caravan for me, man. You like digs.

[Pete Holmes]

If I want to not know what people mean or their intent. I have reality. Like, I don't need.

[Taran Killam]

But. Okay. So here's my pitch to you. This is about Brad specifically.

[Pete Holmes]

Go ahead.

[Taran Killam]

Your theory of people don't really listen to him.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Taran Killam]

He's showing. He's doing that.

[Pete Holmes]

He's like showing you.

[Taran Killam]

If you're not actually listening to the vocal performance and all the physical things. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

Here you go.

[Pete Holmes]

You'll still like it. Yeah. It's like Joaquin in Paul Thomas Anderson.

[Taran Killam]

The Master.

[Pete Holmes]

No, we understood him in the Master. The one we didn't understand him. It's the one that's based after a book. Inherent Vice.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't like movies where people are and I'm like, what?

[Taran Killam]

Did you see Eddington?

[Pete Holmes]

This is a who? I didn't love it.

[Taran Killam]

You didn't love Eddington? Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Did you love it?

[Taran Killam]

I was shocked how much. It's so funny.

[Pete Holmes]

It is funny.

[Taran Killam]

It's so funny.

[Pete Holmes]

Look, I don't want to say I didn't like it.

[Taran Killam]

He just wants to have a baby with his wife. Who does not feel the same way.

[Pete Holmes]

It's Ari Aster.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

Who's just a lot. And if you go in. In the wrong mood. And I think I might have been in the wrong mood. I'm not saying it's not good.

[Taran Killam]

Funny.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Taran Killam]

It's when Antifa is showing up on the private jet like in the third, like I couldn't. It's like a modern Doctor Strange. Love to me.

[Pete Holmes]

I know what you mean. An absurd cinema can be tricky.

[Taran Killam]

The way that he also captured the humanity on both sides of the pandemic mask wearing issue that he presented, I felt quite fairly empathy to both points of view of it.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, that's a miracle.

[Taran Killam]

But it's also in satire.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

I couldn't believe how good it was. I love it.

[Pete Holmes]

Look, I saw Beau is Afraid and I loved it. And people didn't like it.

[Taran Killam]

I had a harder time with Beau.

[Pete Holmes]

I was in the right mood.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. Interesting.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm not saying I didn't like Eddington. I don't think I gave it the right shot. Yeah, that's a real. Turn off the lights and like watch it.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Probably saw it on a plane and. I'm sorry, Miss.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I. I loved it. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I.

[Taran Killam]

And I. And Hereditary. I loved and really effed me up. And I really like Midsommar too.

[Pete Holmes]

I still haven't seen.

[Taran Killam]

It's visually beautiful. I didn't connect quite as much with that one.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

So I was a little nervous heading in Eddington.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. And then you absolutely loved it.

[Taran Killam]

It's one of my favorites of the year.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. I'll give it another try. I sometimes don't like movies that have their intended effect on me. Like they're kind of disturbing.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

You know, warm spot in the pool. And you're like, what was that? And they're like, no, that's what I wanted to do to you. And I'm like, I kind of. What did I watch that was sort of a send up of Modern Times recently that I was like, oh, I like that. Yeah. One battle I liked more than Eddington and I felt like it was. I felt like it was saying a similar thing. But look, I'm out of my depth. I. I should stop talking about Eddington.

[Taran Killam]

I loved. I loved.

[Pete Holmes]

I just like one battle.

[Taran Killam]

I love war battle.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Who cares? More talking about art. We're talking about two dreams we had. I like that one more.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I like frosted flicks more than Raisin Bran. Fucking idiot.

[Taran Killam]

Very good. Mike Birbiglia.

[Pete Holmes]

Fucking idiot more than Raisin Bran. I do a great Birbiglia. My boyfriend's girlfriend. That should be me, right? Anyway, growing up in Brooklyn, I refuse to leave. I have a daughter. Her name's Una. Means one. As in we're only having one. It's good, right?

[Taran Killam]

Tony Clifton, A little bit.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh. The movie that I saw, the thing that I saw recently that really inspired me was Chris Fleming's HBO special.

[Taran Killam]

Okay, watch it. I just started it and then my mom showed up.

[Pete Holmes]

Your mom flew in and said, turn.

[Taran Killam]

I got one sleeves ripping off. And like, I only got so barely scratching the surface.

[Pete Holmes]

Every once in a while you see something and you're just like. It literally gives me hope. Like, this is why we don't have to get into AI. We're almost done. I'm just saying, like, even if AI does make something incredible, I think what it's showing me is that why I'm looking at art is to see what others of. Of humans are doing. Like that. Like, who made it, how they made it.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

Like Nirvana, the band. That was the other one. Nirvana, the band, the show. The movie.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. People are freaking out.

[Pete Holmes]

It inspired me. It literally makes me go like, oh, and come see me in the good light.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

If I. If I only had two hours to convince artificial intelligence not to kill us, I would just show us. Show them. Call. Show me in the good light.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

I would just be like this. And they would go like, affirmative.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Because that's how they talk.

[Taran Killam]

I will end myself. You are stick to live action. Thundercat and he man videos only, which my algorithm is full of. And I'm not mad at it.

[Pete Holmes]

Wait, you're seeing the Thundercat movie clips?

[Taran Killam]

Photo real photo real. Thundercat verse. He man verse. Voltron.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, but they're good.

[Taran Killam]

As good as.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

The 12 second little clip on your phone is like, oh, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

That is what I get bothered when I'm scrolling. And it's Muhammad Ali and Bruce Lee on a talk show. Yeah. You can tell by the time timing that it's not real.

[Taran Killam]

Never see for his gun.

[Pete Holmes]

That's when it was fun. I had too many Dr. Pepper.

[Taran Killam]

No religion too. Oh, but Zus does it. And suddenly we're all charmed by it.

[Pete Holmes]

You just summarized what no longer works. That worked in the 90s.

[Taran Killam]

Yes. That was mind blowing.

[Pete Holmes]

No religion too.

[Taran Killam]

Like, we found out some few days later somebody shot that young man.

[Pete Holmes]

One less thing to worry about.

[Taran Killam]

I mean, that's a weird movie. We love such a weird movie. I remember my mom took me to see it in the theaters and we went into the wrong theater and we came into like their wedding scene and we're like. And. And literally like the woman's going, I think you're the wrong theater. And so we went back and we had. But obviously I think you and I share that. Like we speak in movie quotes a bit. The one of my top 10, if not top five is. And every night we read a book. He's so smart, Jenny. And I'll say he's so smart, like about anything. Like any time a compliment is paid of like. That was really. He was so interested. He's so smart, Jenny. Chills.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, chills.

[Taran Killam]

He wrote you a letter, so I couldn't read that. So I'm going to leave it here for you.

[Pete Holmes]

Maybe it's B.

[Taran Killam]

How'd you planted. Maybe it's Bo.

[Pete Holmes]

Maybe it is Bo.

[Taran Killam]

Maybe they're both right.

[Pete Holmes]

You got new legs.

[Taran Killam]

Magic legs. Lieutenant Dan, you got. This is my wife, Lieutenant D. So good. What a. What a gem. What a. What a. What a star.

[Pete Holmes]

Gary Sise looking true detective in some scenes.

[Taran Killam]

Like, I thanked you for saving my life. He never said it, but I think that day Lt. Dan made his peace with God.

[Pete Holmes]

He's floating.

[Taran Killam]

Blue socks. And cut. All right, somebody help Gary with his blue socks. Someone want to ring out Gary's blue socks? Gotta ring those out. Let's get them dry. Reset. I can take them off myself from fucking Steppenwolf. In Steppenwolf, we take off our own goddamn socks. Our blue screen socks. We handle our own socks.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my God. Maybe it's both. He's so smart.

[Taran Killam]

We read book. He's so smart, Jenny. That's good because also, I mean, there that movie is when you break it down. You're like, oh, I don't know if this is okay anymore.

[Pete Holmes]

Which part?

[Taran Killam]

Just mental health and wearing. Riding the line and the whole tropic thunder of it.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, the magical.

[Taran Killam]

But like. And him having. You know. But his performance when he goes. When she's introduced, he's like, he's. I named him of his daddy. He's got that name force too. Here's daddy. He goes, is. Is he? And you see him click into really human insecurity, vulnerability.

[Pete Holmes]

Is he like me?

[Taran Killam]

Is he like. And he kind of like shakes it off and he's like, okay, again, that's a good acting dead.

[Pete Holmes]

I say, is he like me in my act right now?

[Taran Killam]

Do you.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, I feel a little dirty now that we're talking about how good it

[Taran Killam]

is because he doesn't. He doesn't get it all the way out too. In the movie. He goes, he. He's smartest one in his Class.

[Pete Holmes]

He's real smart for us. He's real smart. What about Captain Phillips when he's in charge?

[Taran Killam]

Oh, my God, that story.

[Pete Holmes]

He's a decomposing fox. Yeah. Too good.

[Taran Killam]

Miraculous.

[Pete Holmes]

Too good.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay, so smashed.

[Taran Killam]

Smashed. Is it Smashed? Story of Marilyn Monroe.

[Pete Holmes]

The story of Marilyn Monroe. No, you're in a show called Tourniquet.

[Taran Killam]

Tourniquet. What is it about? It's about. We all have blue socks. Stumble. Stumble. It is Stumble. It's Stumble, Stumble. I'm very proud of it. I love it. We're on a tough.

[Pete Holmes]

Where do you shoot?

[Taran Killam]

We shot New York for Texas, right? Exactly.

[Pete Holmes]

State. New York.

[Taran Killam]

No, Greenpoint, man. Greenpoint. Brooklyn.

[Pete Holmes]

You just shot him.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah, Texas.

[Pete Holmes]

Those Texas restaurants where you have to eat a steak in three hours. I'd like one of those in Cobble Hill. It's always about to go to bed. I'd like to do that in Cobble Hill.

[Taran Killam]

Rip Van Birbiglia.

[Pete Holmes]

Rip Van Birbiglia. So you shot in Brooklyn. Crazy.

[Taran Killam]

And this is.

[Pete Holmes]

You're going into season three.

[Taran Killam]

We season one finale happens in the real life time this coming Friday, so probably has aired. So the whole season 13 episodes is on Peacock right now.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay, but people found it, right?

[Taran Killam]

People like it, people are liking it. People are really were very well reviewed. Rated. Yeah. We don't know the streaming numbers of it all, but we hear it.

[Pete Holmes]

They didn't share the numbers.

[Taran Killam]

No, they're not giving us the algorithm. Sweet, sweet recipe.

[Pete Holmes]

You can't give them a recipe. No, I'm trying to do McConaughey, not Sling Blade.

[Taran Killam]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. People out here, people streaming. People out here streaming. Something to look up to.

[Taran Killam]

Did you like thumbs up, thumbs down? Next episode starts. Slow down. I want to see the credits. Who's. Who's the best boy?

[Pete Holmes]

Who's a property master, who's the assistant

[Taran Killam]

to Mr. Is there a tag or is that strictly the MCU? All right, all right, all right.

[Pete Holmes]

Or the original Office. Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

I like the little Gareth on the. On the motorbike with the swinging couple and the.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

Eight legs. Six legs. Eight legs, six legs. And that's the real trap. And that's the real challenge. That's the real challenge. Bruce Springsteen. Born to Run.

[Pete Holmes]

Why is that the realest thing that's ever happened on camera? You know what I mean?

[Taran Killam]

Like six things. Like six legs.

[Pete Holmes]

When your shit out your out the toady.

[Taran Killam]

No, Doctor, I'm sorry, I can't touch. I'm busy right now. Doctor, do you happen to remember who sang in the summertime Mungo Jerry. Thank you. His dad. His dad's in the home and wants to talk to him. And he can't be interrupted. So he asks his doctor who sings in the summertime. It's Mungo Jerry.

[Pete Holmes]

Mungo Jerry. And that's the real challenge.

[Taran Killam]

That's a real challenge. That's a real, real challenge. If you kick it over the roof. If you throw his hat, his shoes over the roof.

[Pete Holmes]

Time to go.

[Taran Killam]

And that's the real challenge. That's a real challenge.

[Pete Holmes]

Tying them together.

[Taran Killam]

Bruce Springsteen would run smart. He's going by the strings. Oh, knew he would.

[Pete Holmes]

I knew he would. That's what it is. I knew he would. If you. No, he didn't.

[Taran Killam]

He did not know.

[Pete Holmes]

He did not know.

[Taran Killam]

He couldn't have known. This is not a real thing. I was already.

[Pete Holmes]

I was already wet. So brilliant.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. It's all right. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

When she throws the beer on him.

[Taran Killam]

Not the ass.

[Pete Holmes]

Bend over. The drummer.

[Taran Killam]

The lead singer.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, God.

[Taran Killam]

Oh, Brain busters.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh.

[Taran Killam]

I'll give you one in the proper way. It's perfect. That's perfect art. Yeah. Nothing more inspiring than.

[Pete Holmes]

I know.

[Taran Killam]

Original.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my God. You just. Eight legs. Six legs.

[Taran Killam]

I like six legs. Wrong. A spider is an arachnid, not an insect.

[Pete Holmes]

It makes me want to vomit when. Like a douche.

[Taran Killam]

I like six legs. I like six legs. See?

[Pete Holmes]

White Lotus, they kill the douches on the Office. The douches would win. We were re watching White Lotus, and you're like, oh, that's what Mike White does, is he sets up an insufferable douchebag and has them lose.

[Taran Killam]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

But in shows that we grew up like the Office and one night they would. Finchy would win.

[Taran Killam]

Oh, hey, Finchy. Fuck off.

[Pete Holmes]

One of the best moments of cinema. One of the.

[Taran Killam]

He.

[Pete Holmes]

Ricky Gervais said he almost cried when he was doing it. What is that?

[Taran Killam]

It's only you. All I needed was love. You gave.

[Pete Holmes]

Can I tell you as someone you'll never.

[Taran Killam]

Fiance. I'll have something to say about that. It's not my fiance anymore.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, I'm dead. Never give up.

[Taran Killam]

And that. Never give up.

[Pete Holmes]

Never give up.

[Taran Killam]

In the karma wreck.

[Pete Holmes]

Do you want to.

[Taran Killam]

And you want to swap David?

[Pete Holmes]

Yes, please.

[Taran Killam]

And David witnesses it.

[Pete Holmes]

What do you mean?

[Taran Killam]

Like, witnesses her. Lucy take Tim out.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, yeah.

[Taran Killam]

And he kind of smiles like he. Like he's on the right side of his.

[Pete Holmes]

He's finally on the right side. That's right. That's right. I love it.

[Taran Killam]

Emotional thing, I'm gonna say.

[Pete Holmes]

I Want your honest take.

[Taran Killam]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

Somebody who can't love the office more.

[Taran Killam]

I don't give shitty jobs. Thing is, man comes to me, says, thank you, David, for the opportunity, but I've been there, done that. Thing is, you have not filled out your forklift driver's test. The man who gives the job is a friend of mine. I know you're perfect for it, Taffy. Hey, have you filled the forklift driver's test yet? No. Good. I got a guy. He's perfect. Yeah? Yeah. Already filled it out. Yeah. First day, train house out and have him send it over. All right. I'm seeing this weekend, right? For my sins. How is the missus? Yeah, yeah. All right. I forgot. She left him.

[Pete Holmes]

No, you.

[Taran Killam]

That's perfect. That's perfect.

[Pete Holmes]

That was perfect. Keep your head down.

[Taran Killam]

Tim, what are you doing? Keep your head. Don't work. In a few years,

[Pete Holmes]

you'll be a Nazi.

[Taran Killam]

Okay. Sorry. You were asking. Someone could not love the office more. I wanted to underscore it. I forgot.

[Pete Holmes]

She has loved him. Monkey. People think she's just a big pair of tits.

[Taran Killam]

People think she, you know, said that. Dolly Parton. People say she's a big pair of tits. I have a complaint. Well, you. You're an ambassador for the hotel, so I think. I think you want it here. When I. I think there's been a rape up there. Got his attention. Always get their attention. I phased ya. I phased ya. So let's do it the way I thought we should. We'll all be the manager. And you. I have a complaint. Don't care. Doesn't matter. What room are you staying in? 364. There is no 364 in this hotel. Sometimes the complaints will be false. It's perfect. It's perfect. Some of the complaints, it will be false.

[Pete Holmes]

I think there's been a rape up there. Get their attention.

[Taran Killam]

College attention.

[Pete Holmes]

Get their attention.

[Taran Killam]

Oh.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my God.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. I think Don had a question. Yeah, Dawn. Were we successful? I'll let you be the judge of that. When I tell you we went front and for a little Scottish outfit known as Texas,

[Pete Holmes]

You know what we do? What am I doing in there with a dildo?

[Taran Killam]

All right.

[Pete Holmes]

What am I doing in there? And we also go. They say, oh, what is it? He goes up the butt. It's the wrong way, not the wrong way. It's a way. One out of three, they say, seems a bit high to me, is gay. They like it the wrong way. He doesn't correct it the second time. I didn't do it. Perfectly like you've been doing it. But the second time he calls anal sex, he calls it the wrong way. And he doesn't. Correct.

[Taran Killam]

Lets it be.

[Pete Holmes]

A lot of guys like it the wrong way. No, he goes, a lot of girls like it the wrong way.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

No, not the wrong way. A lot of girls like it the wrong way.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Again, we're laughing at narcissistic. Oh, the narcissist.

[Taran Killam]

Just, just.

[Pete Holmes]

It doesn't have to be dads. But just like the arrogance.

[Taran Killam]

Yes. Of.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't know, people.

[Taran Killam]

The. Everybody wants to feel special. Everybody wants to be special. Right. Like, that's sort of the simple secret to it all.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

And.

[Pete Holmes]

And some people just aren't.

[Taran Killam]

And some people don't have.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't mean aren't. They don't have. He's in the wrong lane.

[Taran Killam]

Idle, objective thing. But. But he's. He. He's. He's desperate for special with no inner critical voice.

[Pete Holmes]

That's right. That's right.

[Taran Killam]

No, like, maybe think about how my

[Pete Holmes]

parents owned a paper company.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Fort Blue. Eh?

[Taran Killam]

Come on. That's. Come on.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, you know, he didn't. I prefer the stuff you do about his little hand. I don't do anything about his little hand. I don't agree with that, with the word. Do, you know?

[Taran Killam]

Do you. Do you know?

[Pete Holmes]

And they're like, yes, you should be laughing, like, oh, God, this sounds stupid. To be crying to the point of tears. To have anything. But just for the sake of interest, I think when he puts out the music single, that's the one time I'm like, it's not. It's just not 100% if you don't. Because it cuts. He's got like. It is funny, but it's just the only time I watch it where I'm like, I don't know.

[Taran Killam]

Well, it is. It's where it heightens. It heightens in a sort of, like, ridiculous manner. It didn't. It didn't bother me because I'm so, like, through and through. Yeah, baby, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

No, I like that whole. It's the Christmas special. I like.

[Taran Killam]

It's a broader. It's a broader heightening.

[Pete Holmes]

It was the woman in the video.

[Taran Killam]

Everything is so grounded. Everything that happens is so. Is so yuckily funny. Because you've seen it.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

Experienced it. And it's all so grounded and authentic.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Taran Killam]

These captured. Why. What's. For both of them.

[Pete Holmes]

The money collected was for both dances.

[Taran Killam]

Spaceman came down to answer some things. The world gathered round from Papas to kings ask me your questions, I'll know what to do. Open your mind and moment. Who is wrong and who is right? Yellow, brown, Black or white? Spaceman, he says you're no longer blind. I've opened your eyes, you're now colorblind. Racial.

[Pete Holmes]

So racial.

[Taran Killam]

Racial, racial, racial.

[Pete Holmes]

When they did the Free Love Freeway. Because I didn't have you get a picture.

[Taran Killam]

No. It just doesn't be gay. It's not gay.

[Pete Holmes]

In the video, he'll be looking at

[Taran Killam]

a picture of her of you. Free love on the Free Love freeway. Love is free. Yeah. That's really due for a rewatch.

[Pete Holmes]

Maybe if you just sit down. Maybe if you just sit down when they're doing the picture.

[Taran Killam]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And the guy's like. Maybe if you. I love being backstage. I love being backstage.

[Taran Killam]

Get out.

[Pete Holmes]

Get out. Are you done in here?

[Taran Killam]

Don't turn it all.

[Pete Holmes]

Let it play out. You guys have been. I've been David Brent. You've been the best.

[Taran Killam]

You've been the best.

[Pete Holmes]

See, there are big swings that I

[Taran Killam]

still feel with the world again.

[Pete Holmes]

I have no notes, just a half a note. But I wouldn't even change it because I still like it. I still like it.

[Taran Killam]

It's perfect.

[Pete Holmes]

It's perfect. Well, I've enjoyed this more than anything.

[Taran Killam]

Likewise.

[Pete Holmes]

Thank you for doing it.

[Taran Killam]

Thank you. Stumble, stumble, stumble on people.

[Pete Holmes]

What's the other one? High something.

[Taran Killam]

High potential. High potential on abc. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Taran Killam]

Okay. It's doing very well. That just got picked up for season.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay, Great.

[Taran Killam]

Yep. Yeah. Yep. Yep.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, look at you.

[Taran Killam]

It's nice. It's nice. It's nice to be working. It's nice to be working on things that people like.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm glad. I'm very. I. I couldn't be a bigger fan. Thank you for coming back. You're welcome. Anytime.

[Taran Killam]

I came back that previous in the pudding.

[Pete Holmes]

I know. We'll come anytime. And we'll just do office quotes next time. We'll do Extras.

[Taran Killam]

Perfect.

[Pete Holmes]

We'll do extras. I'd be the Flying Penguin.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah. I need to freshen up on. On Extras. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, that one. He gave a lot of the hits to the guests.

[Taran Killam]

He did, yeah. Of course.

[Pete Holmes]

They tell you what to say. You know, like he let them. I've seen it all.

[Taran Killam]

I love.

[Pete Holmes]

I've seen everything.

[Taran Killam]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Anyway, keep it crispy.

[Taran Killam]

Keep it.

[Pete Holmes]

You say keep it crispy.

[Taran Killam]

Keep it crispy.

[Pete Holmes]

Thank you.

[Taran Killam]

Keep it crispy.

[Pete Holmes]

I didn't even have to ask. You're a dream come true. Tell your mother I said that I will.

[Taran Killam]

Are you Team Batman or Spiderman? Is the ultimate dish pizza or tacos? SmashBoom Best will help settle those debates and so many more.

[Pete Holmes]

Every episode, we take two cool things,

[Taran Killam]

smash them together, and we see which one is best. Debaters use facts, jokes, stories and more to argue for their side. And it's all judged by a teenager because who is better at judging than a teen? It's fun. It's weirdly informative. It's smashboom Best. Get it Wherever you get your podcasts.