We Made It Weird #223

Summary

You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes – Episode #223 Summary

Release Date: August 1, 2025
Host: Pete Holmes
Guest: Valerie Chaney
Duration: Approximately 1 hour and 15 minutes

---

**1. Introduction and Setting the Tone

Timestamp: [04:58] - [06:16]

Pete Holmes and Valerie Chaney kick off Episode #223 by sharing their morning reflections, breaking away from their usual podcast routine. Valerie highlights the unique quality of this episode, noting a fresh and exciting departure from their standard format.

Valerie Chaney [00:44]: "This episode was unlike any episode we've ever done... a quality to this one that I thought was different. New, exciting, little off-road."

Pete Holmes [00:58]: "It definitely turned my mood around."

---

**2. Embracing Neuroticism and Vulnerability

Timestamp: [05:01] - [13:02]

The conversation delves into their personal neurotic tendencies, acknowledging shared stress and trauma. They humorously discuss minor inconveniences, such as driving a "loner car," and express a desire to embrace their flaws openly.

Valerie Chaney [06:18]: "We're so gross. We're having all the same amount of stress."

Pete Holmes [09:03]: "Absolutely. We are."

Valerie introduces the idea of being the "worst," using it as an exercise to recognize and accept their imperfections.

Valerie Chaney [09:46]: "How are we the worst? Even me being like, that's a good exercise."

---

**3. Cultural Reflections Through Music

Timestamp: [14:01] - [25:08]

Pete and Valerie engage in an in-depth analysis of Simon & Garfunkel's "Bookends," examining its pretentiousness and cultural significance. They discuss the song’s lyrical depth and how it reflects the artistic struggles of the 1960s.

Valerie Chaney [19:24]: "A lot of these songs... are like third base in lesbian sex. I'm not trying to be funny, I'm saying, like, yeah, 69 it up."

Pete Holmes [22:07]: "But then there is another hiss. It's like white noise delight."

They critique the pretentious nature of certain art forms while appreciating the craftsmanship behind them.

---

**4. Industry Insights and Challenges with AI

Timestamp: [29:04] - [41:20]

Valerie shares insights from her friend Mac Neal about executives using AI tools like ChatGPT to bypass reading scripts, introducing the concept of "canary traps"—hidden texts designed to expose inattentive readers.

Valerie Chaney [39:44]: "It's like a tiramisu of white noise. It was like a club sandwich of white noise."

Pete Holmes [40:18]: "I love the people who have so much work flowing in that they could do that to a studio."

They humorously discuss the implications of AI in scriptwriting and the potential for misuse in the entertainment industry.

---

**5. Personal Anecdotes on Vulnerability and Therapy

Timestamp: [45:03] - [73:09]

Transitioning from humor to vulnerability, Valerie opens up about her therapeutic journey with Internal Family Systems (IFS), addressing generational trauma and the pressure to maintain facades. She shares breakthroughs in accepting her true self and shedding inherited burdens.

Valerie Chaney [65:27]: "I'm not gonna skirt around the deuce. I'm going to help Figaro Deuce."

Pete Holmes [68:05]: "You're the first generation that is able to drop the facade."

Valerie discusses the impact of therapy on her relationships and personal growth, emphasizing the importance of authenticity over perfection.

Valerie Chaney [71:15]: "We're talking about all of it, and we're accepting it."

---

**6. Reflections on Media and Personal Growth

Timestamp: [73:09] - [74:55]

Concluding the episode, Pete and Valerie reflect on the role of media in personal development and societal norms. They touch upon horror films, cultural expectations, and the significance of breaking generational cycles to foster healthier relationships and self-acceptance.

Pete Holmes [74:26]: "Healing generational trauma is... the gift that you've given your lineage."

Valerie Chaney [74:36]: "We're keeping it crispy."

They express optimism for future generations, believing that ongoing efforts to embrace vulnerability will lead to more authentic and fulfilling lives.

---

Key Takeaways:

• Embracing Flaws: Pete and Valerie emphasize the importance of accepting one's imperfections and neurotic tendencies as part of personal growth.

• Cultural Critique: Through their discussion of Simon & Garfunkel and other cultural artifacts, they explore themes of pretentiousness and the timeless struggle of artists to maintain authenticity.

• AI in Entertainment: The episode sheds light on the creative industry's challenges with AI, particularly the ethical implications of bypassing script reviews.

• Therapeutic Vulnerability: Valerie's candid conversation about her therapy journey highlights the critical role of addressing generational trauma and fostering genuine self-expression.

• Media's Role: They discuss the impact of media, such as horror films and music, on personal and societal development, advocating for more honest and unfiltered representations.

Notable Quotes:

• Valerie Chaney [06:18]: "We're so gross. We're having all the same amount of stress."

• Pete Holmes [09:06]: "We have PTSD. We're swimming in the PTSD."

• Valerie Chaney [19:24]: "A lot of these songs... are like third base in lesbian sex. I'm not trying to be funny, I'm saying, like, yeah, 69 it up."

• Pete Holmes [22:07]: "But then there is another hiss. It's like white noise delight."

• Valerie Chaney [39:44]: "It's like a tiramisu of white noise. It was like a club sandwich of white noise."

• Valerie Chaney [65:27]: "I'm not gonna skirt around the deuce. I'm going to help Figaro Deuce."

• Pete Holmes [68:05]: "You're the first generation that is able to drop the facade."

---

Conclusion:

Episode #223 of "You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes" offers a blend of humor, cultural critique, and deep personal reflections. Pete and Valerie navigate through topics ranging from the pretentiousness of classic music to the ethical dilemmas posed by AI in creative industries, ultimately centering on the profound journey of self-acceptance and healing. Their candid dialogue not only entertains but also provides valuable insights into embracing one's true self amidst societal pressures.

---

Produced by Katie Levine and Joe Faria. Video and social postings handled by Jake Rohert. Special thanks to Valerie Chaney.

Transcript

[Pete Holmes]

You made it with. You made it with.

[Valerie Chaney]

You made it with. Oh, yeah, you made it with. Yes, you did. You made it weird with Pete Holmes.

[Pete Holmes]

What's happening, weirdos?

[Valerie Chaney]

What's happening, weirdos? This is a good one.

[Pete Holmes]

Wow. It's a lot of fun.

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm gonna say this episode was unlike any episode we've ever done.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, you think?

[Valerie Chaney]

I mean, in. Obviously, in one much larger, more true way. It's exactly like every episode we' ever done. But to those who have listened to a bunch of them, I. There was a quality to this one that I thought was different. New, exciting, little off road.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Valerie Chaney]

I liked it.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

I think we started by, like, disrupting our own pattern, and I think that bled throughout the entire episode in a good way. Yeah, it was like a real, like. No, don't just do an episode of the podcast. Do like a fresh, fresh one.

[Pete Holmes]

I think we did it freshy. I. It definitely turned my mood around.

[Valerie Chaney]

I always feel better after. And that's our hope, is that you guys feel better after listening.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, that's right.

[Valerie Chaney]

So we're glad you're here. Go to PeteHomes.com for my tour dates. I'm just gonna say Boston is coming up. D.C. is coming up. I don't think those are sold out. So if you've been, you know, waiting, go to PeteHomes.com. come out to D.C. come out to Boston. Come out to New Hampshire. Those are the next three. New Hampshire, New Hampshire. And then we just added New York Town hall, which I've never. We filmed in Town hall for crashing, but I've never performed that.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, I love when you do it.

[Valerie Chaney]

Really? Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

It's like Matt Damon.

[Valerie Chaney]

I got a number. How do you like them apples? Number is a good one, but apples, after that, it's just a regular sentence. So we're so glad you're here. Come see me on the road, please end this episode. And all episodes are brought to. Thank you. Brought to us by the things that we actually use and actually love. I think Magic Mind might be one of them. But, like, that's a good example. I find a product I like. We reach out. We do. We do ads. So these aren't just, like, random mercenary contracts. These are things we actually like. And if you give them a try, it helps the show out, and we always appreciate that. So, Katie, roll that beautiful bean footage, and then we'll get into the app. Pardon the interruption, weirdos. This episode is brought to us by our friends at the Perfect Gene get through the summer break in comfort even if you, like me, have a bit of a belly or big thighs or just hate stiff denim with the Perfect Jean as you know, I hate hard pants. We need to enter the 21st century. We need to start wearing comfortable, soft pants that also look, feel amazing and are made impeccably. I got tired of wearing yoga pants like I was sting. I couldn't pull it off. But now I have the perfect Jean. They're the best pants I've ever owned. I literally haven't worn anything since they arrived and I would sleep at in them if I could. And often I have 2% spandex, 2.5% rayon for a stretchy secret that no one needs to know because they look amazing. So many washes, so many cuts, so stylish. They also make amazing T shirts and other items. So liberate your lower limbs with the one and only Perfect Gene. Whether you're working with lemons or lentils, a three leaf clover or a big old honkin eggplant, the Perfect Gene has you covered. It's finally time to stop crushing your balls and uncomfortable jeans by going to theperfectgene.nyc or our listeners get 15% off your first order plus free shipping, free returns and free exchanges. When you use code no Hard Pants at checkout. That's 15% off for new customers at ThePerfectGene NYC with promo code no Hard Pants after your purchase. Tell em you heard about it on this. Show your khakis and get the Perfect Jean. We're also brought to you by our friends at Mud Water. I just had a mud water this morning. What is it? It's a warm, delicious mix of cacao chai and adaptogenic mushrooms that dials me in feeling focused and refreshed with just the right amount of energy without feeling jittery or wired. I'm obsessed with Mud Water because it's not just energy, it's energy in a warm, grounded feeling not jacked. 100% organic gluten free and vegan coffee alternative that is so chock full of goodness it's no wonder it makes you feel amazing. My energy is up and maybe even more importantly, my sleep is improved now that I'm getting more natural energy and drinking less coffee. So if you're ready to make the switch to cleaner energy, head to mud water m wtr.com and grab your starter kit today right now. Weirdos get an exclusive deal up to 43% off your entire order plus free shipping and a free rechargeable frother when you use Code weird. That's right. 43% off up to with code weird@mud WTR.com after your purchase, tell them we sent you. Come on, get it in. You keep your energy natural and. And refreshing all year long with Mud Water, because life's too short for anything less than clean, delicious energy. All right, everybody. So glad you're here.

[Pete Holmes]

Valerie, get into it.

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, my God. Before. What a perfect place to start, because Valerie and I both. This morning, we talk off the podcast.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, sorry. There's some conversations you'll never hear very. But they are exactly like this, so you're not really missing much.

[Valerie Chaney]

That's true. But I. I said to you, I was like, I woke up this morning, and I felt like it was still yesterday.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, you said you were in the middle of a chapter.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah, it was. And it was still yesterday's chapter.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Like, usually in the morning, I wake up and I'm like, I don't know why, but today's gonna be a really great day. You know what I mean? That Andy Sam and Andy Sam. A lonely island.

[Pete Holmes]

It's so good.

[Valerie Chaney]

And this morning. And I hate. I hear Mujibaba. What? Muji, Bubba.

[Pete Holmes]

I know. I just wasn't ready, and I haven't thought about Muji in so long.

[Valerie Chaney]

Love a Muji Baba.

[Pete Holmes]

Love a Muji Baba.

[Valerie Chaney]

That's the.

[Pete Holmes]

We're magic minding. Can you hear it?

[Valerie Chaney]

Are we the. Are we?

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my God, yes.

[Valerie Chaney]

Keeping up with the. This is when we realize we're atrocious. We're at. Let's lean into it.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Valerie Chaney]

We're so gross.

[Pete Holmes]

We are.

[Valerie Chaney]

We're so gross. Welcome to our podcast, where we talk about, like, minor inconveniences as if they're major and wait with bated breath for Pete to bring up that he's swimming in your pool. You managed to get up the mustard. Jump in your own pool.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

This is the audience, and we're to celebrate this.

[Pete Holmes]

I know.

[Valerie Chaney]

How else are we the worst? Go ahead.

[Pete Holmes]

I mean, we are.

[Valerie Chaney]

We are.

[Pete Holmes]

We're are the worst. Just the fact that we, like, have the luxury to sit and think about, like, this morning. I feel like I woke up in the middle of yesterday.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I woke up this morning in the middle of yesterday. All right, Kerouac. Some of us need to go to work.

[Pete Holmes]

Some of us had to rush to the. To our job and didn't have a chance to think about how we felt today.

[Valerie Chaney]

Work is a cop out. It's actually some of us have to, like, take care of Our ailing parents.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Valerie Chaney]

Work is a cop out.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

So much worse. Some of us have to, like, get the loner car. I don't know what's going on in your life. I guess the loner car. Today, a loner car is my guess.

[Pete Holmes]

A loner car is not a term.

[Valerie Chaney]

Because your car is in the shop and you have to drive some fucking embarrassing loner car. And it's like Mr. Bean's car or Borat's car. Throw it in.

[Pete Holmes]

L. They say, literally today. I complained this morning. I complained because I was like, I just can't have mornings where I have to wake up and clean first thing in the morning. Cuz then I.

[Valerie Chaney]

You did say that. You were like, if I wake up and think, oh, no, the cleaners are coming.

[Pete Holmes]

I know, Listen to this.

[Valerie Chaney]

What are we.

[Pete Holmes]

It's not even cleaning.

[Valerie Chaney]

What are we.

[Pete Holmes]

It's cleaning for the cleaners. And I was like, it's ruined my whole day, Valerie.

[Valerie Chaney]

I was going to do a standup comedy routine about nothing stresses me out as much as my wife is stressed out about cleaning for the cleaners.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, great. Please do that. You think that'll make me feel seen? Oh, I mean, I guess that is annoying.

[Valerie Chaney]

I don't know.

[Pete Holmes]

You're right. Don't do that.

[Valerie Chaney]

Because it's like me being like, my butler insists on small talk.

[Pete Holmes]

I know.

[Valerie Chaney]

He's ladling my soup and he goes, enjoy. I'm like, I'm sorry. How do I turn the DVD commentary on this meal off? Niles. His name isn't Niles, but I call him Niles. And he's to answer as such.

[Pete Holmes]

And you know what? Like, neither one of us used to be like this. That's the thing.

[Valerie Chaney]

My only hope is that people quietly like it. Look at that little. We gotta, like, it's a little, little, little glimpse and it's. And we are neurotic.

[Pete Holmes]

You know what? Like, absolutely. We are.

[Valerie Chaney]

We're having all. We're having the same amount of stress.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, don't worry. We have ptsd.

[Valerie Chaney]

We're. We're swimming in the tsd.

[Pete Holmes]

We're very traumatized and we're constantly living with the effect of that.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah. If it. If it's any consolation, we're living this life on one level.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

And on another level, I'm a screaming child running from terror.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. And there is something. It's like a little like mid summer about our beautiful life. But then, like, inside we just sometimes have days where we're screaming children.

[Valerie Chaney]

Well, you know, it's funny. No, I'm shifting gears. I do want to stay on how we're the worst. I think that's a really good exercise.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

How are we the worst? Even me being like, that's a good exercise. That's the worst.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Everything about even us having time to do this podcast at 10am on a Thursday. I gotta think about it.

[Valerie Chaney]

I know. I don't even know what day it is. By the way, I asked somebody yesterday, when are you getting married? And they said October. And I was like, wow, that's a ways away because I don't know what month it is.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

The reason I said that is I have no concept of even what season we're in. And she was like, it's not. It's. You know, it's coming up. I was like, right. Cause it's.

[Pete Holmes]

Let's say it together.

[Valerie Chaney]

Let's say it together.

[Pete Holmes]

Jog U E. Timber.

[Valerie Chaney]

Timber.

[Pete Holmes]

Jog U eritember.

[Valerie Chaney]

Martember. Yeah. I'm gonna take. Only because it's fun. And that's what a podcast is.

[Pete Holmes]

Fun. Okay.

[Valerie Chaney]

It's fun, but it's also like, you gotta have some. You gotta have some takes. You gotta have takes. Our takes get turned up on this show. So here's a turned up take.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

A tut. King Tut. Was he turned up Takes. Wait, what? What? How worried about me would you be if I like, legitimately with a King Tut was turned up takes?

[Pete Holmes]

You.

[Valerie Chaney]

He was a podcaster. And like, I'm crying, like I'm smiling, but there's a tear rolling down my ear.

[Pete Holmes]

Podcaster.

[Valerie Chaney]

It was king turned up take.

[Pete Holmes]

It's blood. It's a blood.

[Valerie Chaney]

I was going to. It was blood. I didn't want to freak you out, but that's what it is. See? Take. It's a tear. Turned up take blood.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Valerie Chaney]

Triple turned up take. It's like cow's blood and I have to lick it. You lick it and you taste it and you go, why is that like Outback Steakhouse?

[Pete Holmes]

That tastes rare.

[Valerie Chaney]

Not only have you never done it before, but it's undercooked. Hit it. Double rare.

[Pete Holmes]

Double rare.

[Valerie Chaney]

Hit it. This is fun. Human connection.

[Pete Holmes]

Is this fun to hear you guys? Do you like this?

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm already classifying this as an episode. You and I will listen.

[Pete Holmes]

We're doing a great job because I'm not looking. I'm not looking at your elbow. I'm looking into your soul right now. And we're hitting every time.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah. This is great.

[Pete Holmes]

This is fantastic.

[Valerie Chaney]

Okay, last one.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, sorry. Okay.

[Valerie Chaney]

We did lose it turned up take. We did lose the beat. I. For funsies. I'm gonna say, as a person who is. Is lately feeling like, when the fuck am I gonna do anything? I. Because you've done this podcast over 200 episodes now. That's been a really wonderful thing because it's obviously just kind of bullshitting around, having fun, but you have to find the time to do it. So the thing that I'm gonna say that actually is effortful is all I'm gonna say.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes. Oh, yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Meaning, like, oh, we have the time to do this. Yeah, we have the time. Because I turned down. Like, I'm not saying work things, but, like, people are like, when are we gonna get coffee? And I'm like, how's never? And then I come and do this.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

And that's my choice. That's how I want it. But it comes at a cost.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, it's just like every other job in that way. Yeah, but I. Yeah, no, there's a whole other argument to be made. It's like you said, like, doing this podcast, you have to take a. In any sort of performance, you have to take a hard stance and really lean into.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah. Well, that's what you did. Sorry, go ahead.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes. Yeah. Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Before we started.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, what did I do?

[Valerie Chaney]

You were, like, frowny.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. I did the, like, classic theater.

[Valerie Chaney]

Like a Fred Willard.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Frowning and then lifting your head and smile. Lifting your hand and smiling.

[Valerie Chaney]

Like, wiping over your face. And then you were smiling. And that sort of. It didn't break my heart, but, like, that was what I was dealing with in. I almost said in theater. In therapy. Dr. Freud.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh.

[Valerie Chaney]

Significant.

[Pete Holmes]

I think it's significant that you said theater.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Is the theater really dead?

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, my God.

[Pete Holmes]

You guys know that's that Simon and Garfunkel song. The most pretentious song that we ever.

[Valerie Chaney]

I think we have to hear it. I think we have to step out and listen.

[Pete Holmes]

Things that Matter.

[Valerie Chaney]

We're going to play it. Valerie, what do you think it's called, Simon? I Think I know Greatest Hits. Here's the album. I Think I Know the Boxer, the Sounds of Silence, I'm a Rock, Homeward Bound. These are hits.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, they have a lot of hits.

[Valerie Chaney]

Okay, what bookends we. No, that's.

[Pete Holmes]

That's the one. I like that one. Sit on a Bench like bookends with. That's when. That's pretentious, too, because she says, with you. With your Emily Dickinson and me, my Robert Frost. I mean.

[Valerie Chaney]

No, that's.

[Pete Holmes]

It is It. That one? Yeah, it is. It is.

[Valerie Chaney]

It is that one. Okay. We found it. We found it. So the question that we're gonna put to you guys is, is the theater really? No, no, no. Is this. Is this song a parody of pretentious people?

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Valerie Chaney]

Or are they representing their true feelings?

[Pete Holmes]

Great question. Are we gonna listen to the whole thing?

[Valerie Chaney]

I believe we talk of things that matter is very early on.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Valerie Chaney]

By the way, just the hiss.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, I love that.

[Valerie Chaney]

It's the 60s hiss.

[Pete Holmes]

I like.

[Valerie Chaney]

They could get it.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, it's the.

[Valerie Chaney]

It's not a record. It's in. It's the ambient. I look, I look, look. It's not like someone made it. No, it's about to start. Nobody, look, look. Not only are we gonna play this whole song, we're gonna talk about the hiss.

[Pete Holmes]

Pause and introduce.

[Valerie Chaney]

We're gonna talk about the hiss. The hiss is the ambient noise in the. In the studio.

[Pete Holmes]

Is it?

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah. And the equipment was such that they couldn't, like.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Valerie Chaney]

They couldn't clean it out.

[Pete Holmes]

The room noise.

[Valerie Chaney]

It's room tone.

[Pete Holmes]

Room tone.

[Valerie Chaney]

Room tone.

[Pete Holmes]

But then there is another hiss.

[Valerie Chaney]

No, no. When you listen to this on vinyl, there was double hiss.

[Pete Holmes]

I love how confident you are.

[Valerie Chaney]

And then on this hiss, another hiss. It's like white noise delight. It was like a tiramisu of white noise. It was a club sandwich of white noise.

[Pete Holmes]

Listen, okay, listen.

[Valerie Chaney]

Okay, Shush, shush, shush. This is what I love about these not being on YouTube.

[Pete Holmes]

It was.

[Valerie Chaney]

Okay, listen. I like. Does he. Does he know.

[Pete Holmes]

Time it was?

[Valerie Chaney]

What a time. What a time it was. I think.

[Pete Holmes]

I think that Earnest. No, I don't think it's. I think that's a clue where he's. To me.

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh. He's saying, let's look back on the time.

[Pete Holmes]

Let's look back on how we were, like, in. In. Like in college. Okay.

[Valerie Chaney]

No, no, no, no, no. You're right. The opening line answers our question.

[Pete Holmes]

I think it does.

[Valerie Chaney]

He's saying, like, remember when we were.

[Pete Holmes]

Young and we were like. We're talking about things that. Confidences.

[Valerie Chaney]

Confidences which can mean secrets must be.

[Pete Holmes]

I have a photograph.

[Valerie Chaney]

Preserve your memories.

[Pete Holmes]

They're all that's left.

[Valerie Chaney]

You see. You see the guy in the studio trying to get Paul to say, see? You see?

[Pete Holmes]

Not Simon, Garfunkel and Holmes.

[Valerie Chaney]

Is this when we realize. Yep, that's. That's when we realize, Valerie. That's when we realize it's the wrong song. It's not. What was that song? It was two lines. It Was two lines. It was like a warmup. What? I had a photograph. That one's done. And it's a greatest hit play. Bookends. We listened.

[Pete Holmes]

Half of it is the instrumental intro.

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, my God.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my.

[Valerie Chaney]

Simon and Garfunkel.

[Pete Holmes]

But that.

[Valerie Chaney]

We talk of things that matter. Okay, this is. But there's something where it's like the Dangling Conversation. That's what it's called.

[Pete Holmes]

But there is a line that in. In one of the songs, it's like we sit on a bench, like bookends.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And it's not the song Bookends. I'm furious all of the time. Very mad about this.

[Valerie Chaney]

Actually, we just. We just listened to it. Yeah. Bookends. This bookend single mix.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, okay.

[Valerie Chaney]

Hold on. This is going to be worth it. The dangling. This is important. Let me bring the audience in on this. Okay. Because I don't think we did a great job of setting what exactly the fuck we're doing. Okay. There's a song, apparently. It's called the Dangling Conversation. We. My whole life I've been obsessed with this song. I find it to be one of the funniest songs of all time.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Valerie Chaney]

Because it seems to be taking some.

[Pete Holmes]

It's so pretentious so seriously. It's like if you had to explain to an alien what what the black.

[Valerie Chaney]

Turtleneck 60s pretension was.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

You'd say, I can do it in 2 minutes and 42 seconds. That's how long the song is.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

And it's so unflinchingly like we were in our, you know, fucking West Village brownstone that we. That we broke into and made a pot of boot soup and we sat by the fire and talked. You can hear it. You don't need me to.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm still laughing. But it was the wrong song.

[Valerie Chaney]

It was the wrong song. Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

Also, I gotta say, I love Simon Garpond.

[Valerie Chaney]

There's nothing wr. This could be an Elliot Smith song. But Elliot Smith would be like. Sorry, if it was Elliot Smith, it would be like I live under a bridge. I don't know. I. I can't do it. He was never under a bridge. It would be sad, is what I'm saying.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Valerie Chaney]

I tried.

[Pete Holmes]

It's a still life watercolor.

[Valerie Chaney]

Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

Don't.

[Valerie Chaney]

I have to stop every time. It's a still life watercolor is already pretty pretentious. Okay.

[Pete Holmes]

As the sun shines through the curtain.

[Valerie Chaney]

Lace I don't hear any. I don't hear any hint that he knows.

[Pete Holmes]

Yup. Couched in our indifference like shells upon the shore you can hear the ocean.

[Valerie Chaney]

Roar in the dangling conversation we're coming to it. I like that line. The borders of our lives. I think it's good.

[Pete Holmes]

And you read your Emily Dickinson and.

[Valerie Chaney]

I my Robert Frost and we note our place with book markers that measure what we've lost I can't tell. Are we wrong? Is this the best song ever?

[Pete Holmes]

No, I mean, it is. It's written well. It just is so. It just is so pretentious.

[Valerie Chaney]

Wait for it. Wait for it. We're coming to it. Okay. It's got to be here. It's here.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes, we speak of things that matter.

[Valerie Chaney]

It's Garfunkel with words that must be said.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, you're right.

[Valerie Chaney]

Can analysis be worthwhile?

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, is the theater really dead? Oh, my God. Can analysis be worthwhile? It's true.

[Valerie Chaney]

Okay, Dad, I didn't know that's what he was saying. That was not a waste of time. Art Garfunkel in a black turtleneck finally.

[Pete Holmes]

Allowed to sing lead.

[Valerie Chaney]

Frozen faced, approaches the microphone and goes, is analysis worthwhile? Is the theater really dead?

[Pete Holmes]

Is the theater.

[Valerie Chaney]

That might have been the moment where the 60s started, like, fucking itself.

[Pete Holmes]

Right? Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

It might have been that moment.

[Pete Holmes]

I mean, that's the thing.

[Valerie Chaney]

It's like hipsters. American Apparel hoodies.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Valerie Chaney]

And Converse All Star shoes.

[Pete Holmes]

My grandfather's pipe box. All Star tickets in it.

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, my God. An old typewriter and camera sitting on my desk. Glasses that I do not need.

[Pete Holmes]

See, that's the thing. Okay, well, that's what is interesting to me, is that it's not their fault.

[Valerie Chaney]

It's not their fault.

[Pete Holmes]

It is beautifully written. It's a perfect example of how you can't see. You don't know what you're in when you're in it.

[Valerie Chaney]

You don't know what you're in.

[Pete Holmes]

And then it becomes something that was so relevant and probably like. Like cutting edge, like, at the time.

[Valerie Chaney]

It blew their minds. This is Dr. Frankenstein's monster.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Like before. I know it comes up almost every episode, but before, people were being pretentious saying, it's actually Frankenstein's monster. The first time someone did that, that was mind bending, Right?

[Pete Holmes]

Totally.

[Valerie Chaney]

Everyone was like, thank you, Professor. But not in a joking way. They were like, thank you, Professor.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Valerie Chaney]

Like, really. I know it sounds like I'm joking, but thank you, Professor. It's one of the hardest things to say with sincerity. Thank you, Professor. It's a hard one. But if you were talking to Stephen Hawking.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. If you're talking.

[Valerie Chaney]

He's like, time is a result. Don't do the voice.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, you almost.

[Valerie Chaney]

And then you go, thank you, Professor.

[Pete Holmes]

Time is a result.

[Valerie Chaney]

Time is a result.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. No, that's the thing. It's like, it's a shame because we're doing it all the time. Everybody's doing it all the time. And if you have, like, the courage to make art and make that art public, you're risking. You are. You're. It's like, pretty much a given that it's going to be. It's going to be, at best, like, timestamped.

[Valerie Chaney]

And you know what? I don't think it can be successful unless it will be ridiculed later.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

You know, the Macarena. The Macarena comes to mind. You know what comes to mind?

[Pete Holmes]

The Macarena. Actually, I think that's an example of something that stood the test of time.

[Valerie Chaney]

Well, some white women still love the Macarena. Show me a Latinx that loves the Macarena and I'll show you somebody who's lost, who's adrift in their life.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my God.

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm just saying, I think the Macarena is a good example. I think the Spice Girls are a good example. All these things that don't age well. There was a time when you go, like, this is the truth.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

And I remember watching when Larry the cable guy was like. Was so much more than a cable guy when he was a global phenomenon. Why am I suddenly, like, worried? Larry, you're still relevant. I'm just saying, there was a heyday, like Mike Myers before him. There was like a golden decade. Of course, Mike Myers had, like, two decades of, like, holy fucking shit.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Valerie Chaney]

And Larry had at least four years.

[Pete Holmes]

What was that?

[Valerie Chaney]

White hotness?

[Pete Holmes]

What was that, like, comedy tour with, like, Ron White?

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah. Redneck comedy tour.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. It was like, those four guys were huge.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yes. Bill Engvall, because I knew where this was going.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm jumping ahead.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

You were gonna go Ron White, Jeff Foxworthy, Larry the cable Guy.

[Pete Holmes]

Favorite out of the two. Out of the four?

[Valerie Chaney]

Well, there's four.

[Pete Holmes]

First of all, I was jumping into.

[Valerie Chaney]

You not knowing Bill Engville.

[Pete Holmes]

That's kind of like a burn.

[Valerie Chaney]

Burn. Who were your favorite of those two? Like, because you're not even including the.

[Pete Holmes]

Other two of them.

[Valerie Chaney]

You know, what's a hot take? It's like, you know, there was a time when it was, like, hip to say, you don't like the American office. We talk about this a lot, too. I think it's also now we're mature and we can acknowledge that. Jeff Foxworthy is a great joke writer. Ron White is incredible. I was going to say Ron is my favorite.

[Pete Holmes]

Ron White is unbelievable.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah. Ron is an incredible, incredible comedian.

[Pete Holmes]

I think he's, I think he holds up. I don't, I don't know if he does.

[Valerie Chaney]

Well, it's funny that we're in a time where we don't know what we're endorsing.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Valerie Chaney]

Because he is. He has the flavor of a comedian who might have been like, guess what?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

And said some shit. So we're not.

[Pete Holmes]

You're right, you're right, you're right. I take it back.

[Valerie Chaney]

No, no, no. Just show your cards.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. I don't know what I'm saying.

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm saying what I've seen of Ron White was phenomenal.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

And sort of in that, like, truth tell, like, he was talking about his divorce and all this, like, real, real, real. Anyway, the real real. Anyway, Larry, when he was at his height, I'm talking like Dish network Larry, the DSL Internet guy. I mean, premium 5K. What he. Somebody college humor posted a clip of him when he was young in his khakis, just doing regular standup.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my God.

[Valerie Chaney]

And I still remember it said, nice khakis, Larry. And I also was like, yeah, everybody comes from somewhere.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

You know what I mean? And this is what I mean. Like Paul Simon and, and, and Hot take. Come on, Art Garfunker. How your dog says Art Garfunkel. You wouldn't even be like, you would. If you had a video of your dog saying Art Garfunkel. You wouldn't even post it.

[Pete Holmes]

A dog could say it easier than we could.

[Valerie Chaney]

Something. Yes. You'd be like, oh, he's. He's garfunkling again.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Anywho, though.

[Pete Holmes]

But if he says Paul Simon, then you've got a real viral video on your hand.

[Valerie Chaney]

Paul Simon.

[Pete Holmes]

What was your point?

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, that, Larry.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, that everybody comes from somewhere.

[Valerie Chaney]

Well, I think we could come up. We could come up with a formula that the more of a time something is, or the more popular something is, the more likely it will be turned upon later. So these guys, and you can see them in the Gaslight Cafe in the Village saying, is analysis worthwhile? And you can actually hear vagina is getting wet.

[Pete Holmes]

I know.

[Valerie Chaney]

Hear the sound of it.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Like, people are like, is someone super into this? Is someone using one of those sponges that, like, people don't want to lick their stamps so they moisten them with a sponge? Is Someone depressing one of those sponges.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Is someone sponging an envelope right now?

[Valerie Chaney]

Is someone sponging it? Oh, it's the ladies.

[Pete Holmes]

But that there is something that I feel like could be. You know, I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna work here anymore. Not gonna. Not gonna work here anymore. I. I'm not gonna get this exactly right. And what's funny is that I was an English major and so my brother and I used to actually deal with this all the time where we would be like talking about like the most. The post modernists and then just the most modernist.

[Valerie Chaney]

The most modernist authors. Me and my brother are English majors and we talk about the most.

[Pete Holmes]

The most modernist.

[Valerie Chaney]

He's the most modern author.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. He's the most popular.

[Valerie Chaney]

I love the most modern movement.

[Pete Holmes]

He's the most potter. And we would like laugh at how pretentious. Like you just can't talk about those things without sounding pretentious.

[Valerie Chaney]

I agree.

[Pete Holmes]

I. So I really leaned hard into that and just forgot everything that I learned. So I'm gonna get this wrong. But there's something where it was like the. The medieval times, the Dark Ages, and then there was like the age of Enlightenment and that was sort of like over correcting for the time that we were all just like dumping our shit everywhere.

[Valerie Chaney]

I can't believe it. You're so right that all the Nileses and Frasierses in the Middle Ages.

[Pete Holmes]

Nileses.

[Valerie Chaney]

Niles.

[Pete Holmes]

And I am. I can't do it.

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm Aunt Frozen.

[Pete Holmes]

I am afraid to do Eyes is the first.

[Valerie Chaney]

Welcome to Gollum teaches you how to talk like him. Does anybody want to show this? Very good Daphnal.

[Pete Holmes]

I was gonna say Daphne.

[Valerie Chaney]

You were Daphnals.

[Pete Holmes]

I really was.

[Valerie Chaney]

Valma's claim. Daphnis is coming to the precious. Is this. Is this.

[Pete Holmes]

I can't do it.

[Valerie Chaney]

I know. What sucks is it's such a darknesses. Nobody even cares if you can do Gollum. Cause it's just. I don't know, it's like something your brain. It's like something your throat can do or can't.

[Pete Holmes]

Kind of like the closest I've ever come to being able to do Kermit is when I try to do Gollum.

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, yeah. Kermit.

[Pete Holmes]

Kermit.

[Valerie Chaney]

Hey, Kermit.

[Pete Holmes]

Hey.

[Valerie Chaney]

Did you notice I was doing a hand puppet with Leela this morning? And it was very Kermit.

[Pete Holmes]

It was. It was very Kermit. It was making me laugh.

[Valerie Chaney]

I know. I was getting laughs.

[Pete Holmes]

You were doing like great movements.

[Valerie Chaney]

We Were doing good puppet stuff.

[Pete Holmes]

She would, like push your arm and you would like, look around and like, like yell for help, but without saying anything.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah, yeah. And there was no noise to the puppet. There was like panicking, but I was really doing. This is boring. Nobody even knows what we're talking about.

[Pete Holmes]

So dorky.

[Valerie Chaney]

I love it.

[Pete Holmes]

All right.

[Valerie Chaney]

What you were saying. Oh, I really. To finish out the first half of what I already know is a wonderful podcast one. If you're super popular and relevant, you will be mocked later. But then I'll add to the. To this. Then you'll get like, maybe your Bob Dylan time. Because I'm sure there was a. When people were. I know there was. When people were like, shut up.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, yes, right.

[Valerie Chaney]

Like a rolling stone. Shut up. And then later you're like, oh, my. So maybe that song.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, and people.

[Valerie Chaney]

Where's the Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel movie, by the way?

[Pete Holmes]

I know they're.

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm cast it right now. Fassbender.

[Pete Holmes]

Fassbender as Paul Simon.

[Valerie Chaney]

As Paul Simon on his knees on a skateboard. And we roll him into every scene and before every take.

[Pete Holmes]

Never address it before every take.

[Valerie Chaney]

We just have to like, pull his face. Like pull it. And like, give him a bad haircut. I love Paul Simon. I'm just saying. Michael Fassbender is such a babe.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, but. But Paul Simon was a babe for sure.

[Valerie Chaney]

No, I know. In that sort of like, Danny devitish kind of way. Well, he was Danny Devitish.

[Pete Holmes]

Danny Devitus is a term we should all be using.

[Valerie Chaney]

Danny DeVito is a. Is a babe.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Valerie Chaney]

Good looking guy. You don't think so?

[Pete Holmes]

I don't want to say that.

[Valerie Chaney]

Is your. There's multiple choice. Is Danny DeVito a babe? A, yes. B, no. C, Prefer not to say. You're checking.

[Pete Holmes]

Prefer not to say.

[Valerie Chaney]

Prefer not to say. On whether or not I was trying to. Yeah. All right. It's not like I'm like. If you asked me to list 150 babes.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm not going to listen.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, but 151.

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh my God, he's on that list.

[Pete Holmes]

Baby.

[Valerie Chaney]

If you said make a list of 150 unlikely babes. Babes you might not think of.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

DeVito might be on there right after Pauly Shore.

[Pete Holmes]

Uh huh. Yeah. No Pauly Shore I could see. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I think Paul Simon was like. I think he got it. I think he could get it in his day.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah, he had. Probably still now kind of like A Gap Kids flavor. Like a. Like a tasteful sweater.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Just. What's going on up there? That's what I want to know.

[Pete Holmes]

Do you prefer solo Paul Simon to Simon Garfunkel?

[Valerie Chaney]

SMG.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

The S&G is down 40 points.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah. Of course I do.

[Pete Holmes]

I do now because I think Graceland is the. Maybe the best album of all time. Of all time.

[Valerie Chaney]

Speedigree.

[Pete Holmes]

But I definitely didn't like until somewhat recently. Probably the last. Last 10 years.

[Valerie Chaney]

Look, when you're.

[Pete Holmes]

I was listening to Simon and Garfunkel in high school. I had a James Taylor poster in my room. I was a geek.

[Valerie Chaney]

That's perfect.

[Pete Holmes]

I was like a folk. Loved. I was a folk geek.

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm gonna say when you're desperate to have some sort of identity, you love Simon and Garfunkel. When you retire, your desperation to be somebody.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

And to be different and cool and interesting. You can just be what we are, which are two dorks.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Being like, Graceland's amazing.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Valerie Chaney]

But when we were in high school, we would have rolled our eyes at that and been like, do you even know the Discourses of Persuasion or whatever that song was we just listened to. Do you know the 32nd song that's called Bookends, but doesn't say it?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Never says it.

[Pete Holmes]

Maybe it's referencing the other song that.

[Valerie Chaney]

Says it's probably something they did in the 60s. It's like this song's like an echo to that song.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

If you played that song into a canyon, this is what would come back. Because Mother Nature has its own interpretation. We hear as humans, it hears as kravos.

[Pete Holmes]

Here it is what we hear as humans, it hears as kravos.

[Valerie Chaney]

And is singing two people at the same time cheating?

[Pete Holmes]

And we.

[Valerie Chaney]

And we here as human. And it hears as crevasse.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm gonna say you think it's cheating. It's cheating. Milk curtain, kids.

[Pete Holmes]

All right, I have to pee, so let's do the mid Rolls.

[Valerie Chaney]

Okay. We'll be right back. And I have. Go ahead. I'm gonna tease the second half because this has been sort of a delightful flutter of nonsense in the best way. While Val is peeing. I was gonna say, for anybody that's interested, my friend Mac Neal. Mac heard last week's episode and gave an Update on why ChatGPT might have summarized that script that I loaded into it wrong. And it's very interesting. So, Mac, you get a shout out and you close that loop to anybody. That was curious. Cause I certainly was. He's a brilliant guy in a lot of ways, but certainly when it comes to tech. So thank you for the help, Mac. He said it's likely that these. These scripts. Now people know that so many executives are loading scripts into Chat GPT and not reading them. So they're putting what's called a canary trap in the script, meaning there's invisible text, kind of like on Nathan for you. They wanted emails to go to people's spam folder so they would find. Fill the bottom of the email with all this invisible text which said like, penis enlargement and all that sort of stuff. So it would get flagged in the same way a script can be overlain over a script written in like, let's say white ink on white paper, just metaphorically, obviously, that you can't read to. To fuck up Chat GPT isn't that fascinating. So they're like, we know executives are cheating. We want to out them and embarrass them. So we have the meeting, and if they say, oh, I loved your script. It's about a bank heist, and they'll know that they didn't really read it. And then Mac told me that when Matt and Ben. Matt Damon and Ben Affleck were going out with Good Will Hunting in the middle of that amazing script, there was like a homoerotic love scene. There was like an out of nowhere, I guess. Not homoerotic. It's just homosexual. It's just gay. A gay sex scene. Val comes back as I'm saying it's a homo. It's a homosexual gay sex scene.

[Pete Holmes]

What is happening?

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm explaining something. Oh, you should have been here for it. It's okay. I'll tell you later.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Valerie Chaney]

Matt Damon and Ben Affleck would put a. Put in Good Will Hunting, like an out of nowhere, very erotic gay sex scene.

[Pete Holmes]

What?

[Valerie Chaney]

To see who really read it.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my God.

[Valerie Chaney]

Because I will tell you ever so briefly, the reason why my friend Mac told me that Chat GPT was badly summarizing that script I gave it was sometimes people are putting fake scripts underneath the real script to trick Chat GPT isn't that fascinating?

[Pete Holmes]

Whoa.

[Valerie Chaney]

Called a canary trap.

[Pete Holmes]

What do you mean underneath?

[Valerie Chaney]

Like, you can't see it. Invisible text.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh.

[Valerie Chaney]

So ChatGPT is reading a script that's overlain on the actual script.

[Pete Holmes]

Whoa.

[Valerie Chaney]

So it'll be like. So when it's basically to set traps.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my.

[Valerie Chaney]

For executives to be like, I loved it. When they leave Earth and they make it halfway to Mars and they explode and you're like, actually, it was about a child with autism, but thanks for letting me know. You don't even read scripts. I won't be doing work with you. Paramount or whoever it is.

[Pete Holmes]

I love the people who are just have so much work flowing in that they could do that to a studio.

[Valerie Chaney]

That's hilarious. I'm gonna humiliate you. That's how I was humiliated. Yeah, I thought you were gonna say that. Have that much sense that they could write a dummy script. But then I was like, what's perfect is that's what Chat GT ChatGPT is for, is Write Me a Hundred. Your script's 132 pages. You say, Write me a 132 page script about clown college and the dean, who is a clown, gets assassinated and all the clowns are trying to like, mourn him, but everyone keeps laughing because they're clowns and they keep insisting, no, this is real. Our grief is real. And it's a metaphor for communism. It'll do it.

[Pete Holmes]

That's great.

[Valerie Chaney]

And then that's the summary. The executive gets, takes the meeting.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

He's like, I want to buy the fake script.

[Pete Holmes]

I love it too, because your. Your Movie scripts are 132 pages.

[Valerie Chaney]

Is that long?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Mine are way longer than that. I can't help it.

[Pete Holmes]

I love that. I mean, there's. There's really something to that. The first draft of lady bird was 300 pages.

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, really?

[Pete Holmes]

I like to keep mine tight. I love 100.

[Valerie Chaney]

I love how tight. No, okay. I meant that every.

[Pete Holmes]

The stamp sound, by the way. Okay, going back to the fake.

[Valerie Chaney]

We're going to the mid rolls.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. But this such a little. Just so you know, going back to the fake, like erotic body duck.

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm just going to do them wired.

[Pete Holmes]

No, maybe that is a good. That's a good cliffhanger. Cuz it's like juicy.

[Valerie Chaney]

I was joking.

[Pete Holmes]

So when we get back, I'll tell you something interesting about the embedded gay erotic.

[Valerie Chaney]

Ooh, Good Will Hunting sex scene. Yeah. And then I want to tell everybody about a huge. I won't. A therapy thing that was really, really helpful to me. We'll be right back. Not just on this podcast, but everywhere. And to every guy I know, I've been screaming from the rooftops about Kenobody and their supplements. Specifically Mojo, which helps your body naturally produce testosterone. I went to my doctor. I had low, mid low testosterone. I didn't think that was a big deal. I started supplementing with Kenobody Mojo. And I can't Tell you the difference I'm like is testosterone everything. It's drive, it's motivation. I'm exercising more, I'm more decisive, I'm getting more work done. I am so glad that we can get rid of these lethargic, tired, dull, lacking edge feelings naturally by suppressing cortisol which is a stress hormone. Allowing your body to make testosterone naturally and taking this supplement has made a huge difference. Motivation, drive, creativity, working out, lasting longer and going harder. My energy is up and blood flow. Wink wink. Everything that blood flow could possibly mean for a man. Everything in my life has been completely, completely mojo. Testosterone is directly linked to dopamine which is motivational hormone. And dang, I'm setting goals, I'm getting up earlier and when I have something on my to do list, I just full Nike, I just do it. Mojo is the solution. Giving your body the vitamins and minerals it needs to produce testosterone naturally. By end lower cortisol to help you get that mojo back. I love it. I also take shred. I love nitro, I love their octane which is often what I'm drinking in my little coffee mug there. It's a natural pre workout with clean energy, euphoric focus, no crash. Trust me, this company is legit. Try octane, try Mojo, then try everything else. You can get 20% off at kino body k-I n o b o d y dot com with your first order with promo code weird. That's 20% [e-mail] with promo code weird. We're also brought to us by our friends at Magic Mind. Of course my desk is covered in Magic Mind. They're all empty right now because I just had one. Magic Mind is a magical elixir that helps you dial in and focus, drink less coffee. It's basically Matcha with adaptogens and nootropics. Nootropics to help you think. Adaptogens to round out the edges of that caffeine. And caffeine to spike you up just the right amount and put you in the middle. Not jacked, not jittery, dialed in and focused. It's like athletes have Gatorade and focus now creators have creator aid. Get that wired in on demand. 30% more done on average. That's five to seven hours of 30% more productivity after drinking. Fight off procrastination, brain fog, fatigue and some ADD symptoms. And get into that flow state by going to magicmind.com weird and use my discount code weird to get a limited 20% off your first order. That's magicmind.com weird. Good. We're back. How were those mid rolls for you?

[Pete Holmes]

Did you love them? Did you buy any of them?

[Valerie Chaney]

Did you. Did you. Did you risk a car accident to 10 second forward 12 times? Or did you just go, hey, I'm gonna. Listen, maybe I'll learn something.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay, I. This is real quick. But. And. And it is. It is tricky. I'm gonna. I'm not gonna skirt around the. The complicated part of this. I'm just gonna be fully vulnerable.

[Valerie Chaney]

Can we make a new expression? I'm not gonna skirt around the deuce.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm not gonna.

[Valerie Chaney]

I feel like that seems good.

[Pete Holmes]

Deuce.

[Valerie Chaney]

It doesn't mean poop. It's an old. It's from 1910.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay.

[Valerie Chaney]

There was a gentleman named Figaro Deuce and people. He got shot in a bar fight and he was bleeding out on the, on a. On the floorboards of this old bar.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Valerie Chaney]

And apparently he was so hated that everybody left and would skirt around his body. They didn't help him.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my God.

[Valerie Chaney]

The expression, I'm not going to skirt around the deuce. I'm going to help fig row. Deuce.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay. This is. I'm also going to embarrass myself that I couldn't even retain this information, but I literally had a. Like an actual moment like that where my friend, Our friend John Leland said, I really borked that. And I was like, borked? That's a funny term. Like, I know biffed, but, like, I'm gonna start saying borked. And he was like, oh, yeah, that comes from. And this is the part where I'm not gonna get the details right. John Bork, during the signing of the Declaration of Independence, like, messed up his signature. Yeah. But it wasn't that. But it was something like that. And I was like, what a really funny phrase for the most boring reason I've ever heard.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I've hated this. Well, you know that was fake, right?

[Pete Holmes]

No. Was it?

[Valerie Chaney]

Figaro Deuce?

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, no, I know that was fake. I thought you were saying Bork.

[Valerie Chaney]

I thought for the briefest second you thought Figaro Deuce was real.

[Pete Holmes]

No, I know. Figaro Deuce. Deuce Bigelow male gigolo.

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, my God. Bigaro Deuce Bigelow male gigolo was shot in a turn of the century bar and he was bleeding on the floorboards and everyone skirted around him. Yeah, I'm not gonna skirt the deuce. So don't skirt the deuce. Just tell us directly.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay, So I went and saw blue is the Warmest color at Ojai Playhouse.

[Valerie Chaney]

There's a whole theater filled of the stamp sound.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. But here's the thing.

[Valerie Chaney]

If people don't know, it's a very erotic.

[Pete Holmes]

It's very erotic.

[Valerie Chaney]

I mean, it's like, I think it's a great film.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Valerie Chaney]

But you will blush.

[Pete Holmes]

I have to. Yes. So, yes, I'm gonna touch on all of that, because here's my history with it, and this is where I'm gonna get real vulnerable. Like, maybe eight years ago, Jesse Klein on your podcast.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Said the only porn I watch is the sex scene from Blue is the Warmest Color. And then I was like, okay, let's check that out.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And then for years, that was the only porn I watched.

[Valerie Chaney]

Was that it's been in your stable.

[Pete Holmes]

It's been in my stable. Then, unfortunately, I heard, and I don't know the full details, that, like, it was very controversial because clear. Like, it is porn. Like, they are. They are doing stuff that you cannot fake. No amount of, like, Saran Wrap or fake body parts can, like, oh. Hide what they're doing. And also, they were, like, incredibly young. And then I think the actresses even came out and said, like, they. They weren't comfortable, which is awful. So then I stopped watching it.

[Valerie Chaney]

I didn't know any of that.

[Pete Holmes]

I know.

[Valerie Chaney]

But then I will say that when we watched it, it was, like, over 10 years ago.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Valerie Chaney]

And when you were like, we're gonna go see it now, I was like, I've made this point many times. I'm like, once you get older and you have kids, you're like, those just look like children.

[Pete Holmes]

They. They do look really young. Yeah. And so. Okay. And then this is where I'm not proud of it. And it's funny, sort of the mental gymnastics that you do, but I was like, okay, oh, High Playhouse is playing it. And all of those things I had heard secondhand. I never, like, researched about it.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And. And then my friend invited was, like, a group of ladies and I are gonna go and see it.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And I was like, maybe that. Maybe that I got that wrong. Like, maybe that's not true. And, like. And also was probably saying that because I did want to go and see it, because also I remember it being, like, such a beautiful and inspiring film. Like, aside from all the sexiness, it's like. Like, it's really beautifully shot. And, like, it's just very. I knew it would give me that, like, very specific type of inspiration that only good films can do.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

So I was like, okay. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. And then I went and I thought it was gonna be like a big group of ladies and it was just one of my friends. So it was just me and another one of my girlfriends.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yes.

[Pete Holmes]

And like, I was like. And she hadn't seen it, so I was like, oh, my. Oh, boy. Buckle up, here we go. And it ended up being really funny. Like, it was like, you know, we made it through the long. It's like a 15 minute sex scene. And this is what. What it made me think of was I was like, seeing it all as one piece. It does feel like it doesn't belong. It does. It shouldn't. Yeah. Like, it really is like a little miniature porn in the middle of this movie.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Where you're just like, oh, my God, it doesn't belong here.

[Valerie Chaney]

Who directed it?

[Pete Holmes]

I don't know. Some. Maybe some French guy. I know, I know. So it really. It felt so clear to me that it, like, stuck out like a sore thumb. Like, you're like, this does not belong in this movie.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah. Yeah. That seems so. Like, get the kind of inspiration I've had the thought. I'm like, why haven't they ever made a movie that just has, like, real sex in the middle of it?

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Like, why is pornography, like, it's. Look, I understand why it is.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Valerie Chaney]

But like, pornography only shows up really. In pornography places.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

And they're. And the French, I'm gonna say it for a very long time have been trying to be like. I completely agree. You should just have a little. A wisp.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Of pornography. And we don't even call it pornography. Is this voice. Okay? I'm just. Yeah, I understand. Like, there's a couple examples. One is A History of violence, which is also directed by a Frenchman. Has a very. I believe, has a very. It features 69ing.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, this one does too, for sure.

[Valerie Chaney]

I mean, 69, I feel like, is like third base in lesbian sex. I'm not trying to be funny. I'm saying, like, yeah, 69 it up. It's gotta be like, it's a very, like, off menu move for the straights.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Valerie Chaney]

But I feel like, am I wrong? I shouldn't be making declarative statements about a community that I neither belong to nor represent. So I. Thank you, your honor. And I just. I take my briefcase and I just leave. But I'm immediately tased and thrown into jail. I'm just. I'm. I'm. Okay, I'm going to move away from that topic. I am going to say it features 69ing. And I watched it with the commentary, and the director was, like, very happy that that was the first time in, like, a western film that that. And they had to, like, fight for it.

[Pete Holmes]

Wow.

[Valerie Chaney]

It doesn't show it, but you see it. And then there's the movie the Getaway, which is Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger when they were married. And I think I've talked about this on the podcast because me and Earn, my best friend in junior high and high school, we rented the Getaway vhs and they're just fucking in that movie. Like, I could be wrong. Some of it is in, like, silhouette. I've definitely told you this story. You let me know if this is familiar.

[Pete Holmes]

It does sound familiar.

[Valerie Chaney]

We're watching the sex scene and I started yelling, that's penis in vagina. That's penis in vagina. So much so that if I texted Ern, that's penis in vagina, he would know what I was.

[Pete Holmes]

I would hope so.

[Valerie Chaney]

It's also full. Yeah, let's hope so. It's full. Bay Baldwin.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, wow. Full bay ball.

[Valerie Chaney]

I mean, Paul Simon was never close to full bay ball, you know, and.

[Pete Holmes]

And neither were any of the other bald ones.

[Valerie Chaney]

I think Billy Baldwin has a. Has a certain.

[Pete Holmes]

He has a thing.

[Valerie Chaney]

Billy's gotta like, yeah, come on.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, there's something.

[Valerie Chaney]

What is Billy? Alec is like white tablecloth dinner. And Billy's like, let's go to. In and out.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, Surfer. And then Stephen is full. I don't know. Well, I only know him from my brother's favorite movie, Biodome.

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, right.

[Pete Holmes]

I don't know. I don't think that's his favorite movie, but even he does love has a.

[Valerie Chaney]

Chet Hayes flavor to me. Like, is that. Am I saying that I don't know.

[Pete Holmes]

Who is that?

[Valerie Chaney]

Tom Hanks's rapper son.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, I don't.

[Valerie Chaney]

I don't know much about him.

[Pete Holmes]

But yeah. So anyway, it was sort of uncomfortable because it was just me and my friend watching it and because, like, as. As it seemed so apparent that it didn't need to be that long and that involved. I was like, oh, I bet this is true. And then I felt really uncomfortable the rest of the movie. But we did. As the. Like, after the sex scene ended, we both were just like, okay. And I was like, we made it. And then we, like, shook hands and it was really funny.

[Valerie Chaney]

There's a certain thing when you've seen a movie. This is what happened with me and Jamie Lee when we watched the Exorcist. She had seen the Exorcist. I had never seen the Exorcist. And of course I was like, horrified. Yeah, and I've said this before too, but like, there's a scene. It was the extended cut. I don't know if it's in the director's cut, but the child, like crab walks another young person who later said, I didn't like that.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, really?

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. She had back problems the rest of her life because they were like another take of thrashing. Not trying to be funny. That's what they were doing.

[Pete Holmes]

And like bending backwards.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my God. Poor thing.

[Valerie Chaney]

So she crab walks her. I'm assuming some middle aged man in a wig. Crab walk down the stairs. Her. Her double did a handstand and then vomited.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, God.

[Valerie Chaney]

And I. And then I'm looking at Jamie. This is. She's the one who's seen it. And I go, why didn't you warn me about this? And she goes, I didn't remember that part. And I'm like, how do you forget that part? I'll never forget that part.

[Pete Holmes]

I'll never forget it. And I've never seen it.

[Valerie Chaney]

If you love the Exorcist, there's just something fundamentally.

[Pete Holmes]

Maybe you just weren't raised religious.

[Valerie Chaney]

Who, me?

[Pete Holmes]

No, people who loved it.

[Valerie Chaney]

That could be, I think maybe. Yeah, maybe.

[Pete Holmes]

I mean. Oh, God, it's. It's crazy how much even you just telling me about that scared me.

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, really? I'm sorry.

[Pete Holmes]

No, it's okay.

[Valerie Chaney]

I thought crab walk. I kept it light.

[Pete Holmes]

No, you did a great job.

[Valerie Chaney]

Barfed. But I will say this. Can I say this as a great comfort? This is one of the great services I have to offer to people that haven't seen the Exorcist. It's worse in your mind.

[Pete Holmes]

Okay? That's.

[Valerie Chaney]

It's way worse in your mind. I'm not saying it's not awful.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

But nothing compares to the nightmare that you think the Exorcist is based on how people talk about it.

[Pete Holmes]

Right? And. And you just have the scariest moments in your head. Like, I know about the head turning and the, like the owl moment. Oh, no, but don't tell me.

[Valerie Chaney]

No, it's turning its head like an owl. It's. I don't know.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, God, it's so crazy that we were raised, or I was raised really to believe that, like, that really is real.

[Valerie Chaney]

I was just. I did this thing yesterday at a converted convent and it's a Catholic living house place. I don't know. The diocese still owns it. And it's a house for, like, intentional living for people, some who work in the church anyway. And at one point, the person I was with asked them if it was haunted. And we just went from, like, kind of like really feeling not too exotic, too deeply Catholic, because it was like, yeah, we had an exorcism. Like, we did. Like. And I was like, right, right. It's one of the. I don't want to say. I don't want to say goofy. It's one of the. Like, what do you say? There's Catholicism. Here's like, Richard Rohr and Father Boyle and billions of these people. And then there's this weird. It's like. Let's not even say weird. If Catholicism is a video store in the 90s.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

The beaded door leads to the exorcism section. And some people are really into it. They love it. And there's that. The whole thing. And. And then there's a lot of Catholics that never even go in that room.

[Pete Holmes]

That's right. I think that's.

[Valerie Chaney]

I would say maybe the majority of Catholics don't go. Like, we're like the. But then, like, I don't know that movie.

[Pete Holmes]

I know. I also just feel like. I mean, because there's an equivalent in sort of the mystical New Age world, too, where Speed.

[Valerie Chaney]

Agree.

[Pete Holmes]

Where it's like. Yeah. It's like, oh, you know, there's our light workers and our ancestors are helping us. And you're like, this sounds lovely. And they're like. And then also some. Something dark latched on to you. And that's why you have stomach issues. And you're like, fucking hell.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah. No, people. People love a system.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

And I thought. I agree with everything you said. If New Age, which I guess, are we new? I don't know. No, I don't feel that New Age, we don't really fuck with anything.

[Pete Holmes]

We're like mystics, kind of.

[Valerie Chaney]

I appreciate that. I like that.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

In the New Age video store in the 90s, behind the beaded door is. Are angels.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Like, I'm not saying, but.

[Pete Holmes]

But there's like, equal.

[Valerie Chaney]

And demons. Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

People. Really dark. And that's where I have to go. Like, I just can't. Like, I can't actually. My specific wounding of, like, being a child and like, my OCD being like, just say, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus. Until you fall asleep, and then maybe, like, a demon won't come into your room.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah, I know.

[Pete Holmes]

Like, I. I shan't be, like, for both of us. What is that? I shan't be. Whatever dealing with that anymore.

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm with you and I. This is the first time I really realized that that is a type of trauma. It's a trauma response, meaning I can stand in my grown upness and be like, this is silly. But even when I watch all the Nathan for yous, when Nathan is at the exorcism, I'm like, I wouldn't be comfortable with this.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, my gosh. No, we just.

[Valerie Chaney]

I would hate this.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, we just.

[Valerie Chaney]

I do hate this.

[Pete Holmes]

The episode come out with. With. With Harvey where he tells that terrifying ghost story, Remember?

[Valerie Chaney]

No. How did I forget?

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, he told with the, like. Like, remember they took a video, and then it wasn't the voice, and the. The voice was, like, whispering something in real life, but in the video, it just sounded, like, so bad.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah, that one didn't get me for so. Because I've heard so many of them. I'm not putting down Harvey. He's amazing. No, but I remember when he told that one, I was like, once you've had Brett Goldstein's.

[Pete Holmes]

Well, you know, I skipped Brett Goldstein's, and I've had to skip his.

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, wow. Don't skip it. It's good.

[Pete Holmes]

No, I didn't skip the episode. I skipped the goal. The.

[Valerie Chaney]

Brett, if you're listening, I'm sorry that you did the. That horrible impression. Yeah, yeah, no, it's all right. It's. It's pretty good. It's a sin. It's not.

[Pete Holmes]

But he. He's told that story on his podcast too, I think. And I had to skip it, too. I know there's something with, like, pennies and hard candies or something. I don't know if there's hard candies.

[Valerie Chaney]

I'm gonna say. I'm gonna be embarrassed worse. In your mind.

[Pete Holmes]

I just. I. I've. I've only.

[Valerie Chaney]

But it's a poltergeisty.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes. And I've only heard it in, like, the. Like, where you're skipping 10, and it's like. And then the pennies started the house, and you're like, oh, my God, thank God that's over.

[Valerie Chaney]

But Brett is a good one because he's so, like. It's impolite in a British way. It's impolite to tell a ghost story, so you know it's real.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, if it had just been.

[Valerie Chaney]

He would have been like, let's never talk about that. But so much happened that he had to be like, I beg your pardon. Yeah, I have to tell you. The story. Like, they don't want to.

[Pete Holmes]

They don't want to.

[Valerie Chaney]

There are more sensational cultures.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

No shots fired there. I'm just saying there's. There's more flavorful cultures. And the Brits are like, if you didn't see a specter.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

You don't even tell the story. You just go, put that away with. With boarding school.

[Pete Holmes]

I do wonder if there's, like, a connection to, like, British culture or, like, more like repressed cultures loving horror films because, like, I know Brett loves horror. Loves, like, David lynch. And so it's like.

[Valerie Chaney]

No. They outsource their weirdness.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. Maybe it's like. Because there's just, like, no dealing with shadow in regular life.

[Valerie Chaney]

And also punk rock. They're like, I'm so not British. I have a safety pin through my nose.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah, exactly.

[Valerie Chaney]

Take that. And I have a different way of giving you the fingers. Two fingers and go. That's how I do. And these. These red plaid pants are painted on.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

That's an overcorrection. Just like in Japan.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, right.

[Valerie Chaney]

Both their. You know, the sexual sex stuff and horror stuff.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. But I. Yeah, because I feel like this is what. Why I've been loving the show too much is so good. And Megan Stalter is so good in it. And, like, I just. I loved Girls and I'm like, this feels like the, like, sequel to Girls. And it makes me so happy. But it's so much about, like, an American woman who is, like, you know, in quotes, too much for even, like, America.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Coming over to England.

[Valerie Chaney]

Right.

[Pete Holmes]

Just, like, really bashing around.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

But, like, they. But also they love her.

[Valerie Chaney]

That spoon is for the egg, dear.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

And she's got it in Ben and Jerry's, and it's like.

[Pete Holmes]

No. Yeah, exactly.

[Valerie Chaney]

Oh, I'm sorry. You brought your own ice cream.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. That.

[Valerie Chaney]

You brought your own pudding, but you.

[Pete Holmes]

Your own pood.

[Valerie Chaney]

You brought your own food.

[Pete Holmes]

But then, like, he. Felix, the, like, love interest, loves her because she's, like, so alive.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And like. And.

[Valerie Chaney]

But I think I like it.

[Pete Holmes]

I think you'll love it.

[Valerie Chaney]

I love Megan Stall.

[Pete Holmes]

She's so good.

[Valerie Chaney]

Love, Laney Duns.

[Pete Holmes]

It's. I please go and watch that show. It is. I've loved it. I'm on the 10. I'm on the last episode, and I'm, like, slowly drawing it out. Like, I have felt like I had. I have a crush on this show. Like, I think about it all day even when I'm not watching it. I, like, can't Wait to be alone with it.

[Valerie Chaney]

Are we still talking about the show or me? You talking about me? Val.

[Pete Holmes]

It's maybe all blurring together.

[Valerie Chaney]

Hey, Val.

[Pete Holmes]

All right.

[Valerie Chaney]

Pete's out of town. Maybe I come by with a couple of warm beers. Stop it. I have to dig them a little bit and say warm.

[Pete Holmes]

Warm beers in England. He doesn't deserve that. I know he doesn't deserve that.

[Valerie Chaney]

I don't represent the pub culture. No, I love a Code Newcastle. That was good.

[Pete Holmes]

That was very good.

[Valerie Chaney]

I love a cold.

[Pete Holmes]

I can't do it.

[Valerie Chaney]

Love a co. New Castle.

[Pete Holmes]

What if I tried to do a Brett impression right now and did a perfect smeagle?

[Valerie Chaney]

You're very funny.

[Pete Holmes]

Anyway. But I do feel just to. And wrapped. Wrap that up. That's how I feel about horror films. And I know obviously a lot of Americans love horror films.

[Valerie Chaney]

Billions apparently.

[Pete Holmes]

But I'm just like, I can't believe that you would. Terry. There, that's the word I was looking for. Like, that you would want to visit that world for funsies.

[Valerie Chaney]

Like, I am always closure therapy.

[Pete Holmes]

I'm always trying to not. I'm already feeling terror, believe it or not. Normal life.

[Valerie Chaney]

Val. Perfect segue here in our final moments, that I was dealing with terror, like some terror that lives in my body. And in therapy, I said to all my different parts, all the different aspects of myself, I was like, I want to look at this terror. And I actually said not. Not to titillate myself, not to entertain myself, but because it's hurting us. And it's so. Even just saying that the body like. Like wilts and surrenders. It's like, you're not just, like, trying to scare yourself. You're like, I really want to address this and help with this. I had a really, really great breakthrough yesterday doing parts work, internal family systems, which I can't recommend enough. I think it's. I don't know, it's like condensed therapy. It's like a hundred sessions in one session. And I realized, I. I don't know, I was. The thing that I realized which goes back to your hand going over your face and making yourself smile is I was like, oh, I'm really unpacking this generational burden. Kind of like the Brits to not show who I really am. Obviously, I'm not doing that. But, like, in my family, there was an agreement, and I believe that agreement went back to their families to be like, we're winners. Smile even when you're sad. Look successful even when you're not. Never break, never crack. I was like, oh, my God, that's one of the cycles I'm breaking and not gonna give to our daughter is that, like, you have to. And clearly, anyone that listens to this podcast is like, nobody thinks you're doing that now. But, like, when I go home, one of the reasons it's so stilted is cause it's like playing a video game where there's four choices of the thing you can say, but, like, the ones that are real are, like, unavailable. You can't actually. You have to just be like, well, that's why the example I always gave back when I was drinking, my father said to me, he goes, you don't drink, do you, Peter? And I was drinking wine at that meal. I was like, we're colluding this other reality. And part of what I'm doing in therapy is going like, we're not doing that anymore.

[Pete Holmes]

Yes.

[Valerie Chaney]

We're talking about all of it, and we're accepting it. And what I really realized was it wasn't the threat isn't that my family would be mad at me. The threat is that I would expose them and destroy or humiliate them.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

It's like, if I don't keep pushing the boulder up the hill, it'll roll back and smush us all. And does that make sense?

[Pete Holmes]

Yep. Absolutely. And it is something that's so interesting because you don't. I. I know I already said this to you, but, like, you've gone. Gotten to the root of this thing in therapy just yesterday, but, like, usually that's where people's work begins, is like, there's this realization, and then it's like, okay, now I have to break this pattern or break this cycle. And you really. I'm telling you, as the person who's been closest to you for 12 years, you don't do that. Like, you have not carried on this. Like, keep the facade. Keep it all perfect. Keep it, like, don't let people in. Make sure that you always come out a winner. Like, you just. There's no shred of that in your real life.

[Valerie Chaney]

That. And I need to hear that all the time. And it goes back to why it's funny, I dropped Leela off in the. These sweatpants, and they're absurdly, like, tight.

[Pete Holmes]

Very, very tight looking. Yeah. Like, you can.

[Valerie Chaney]

But believe it or not, the Luke Wilson chic, as I call it. You know what I mean? Kind of like that. Like, dropping your kid off in your PJs. There's. There is a method to that. It's like, I'M not going to show up with a shiny belt buckle.

[Pete Holmes]

Right.

[Valerie Chaney]

I want you to see that. Like, yeah, I slept in these pants and we're running late. And there's like an ownership. There's the folding in of all the flaws and the foibles.

[Pete Holmes]

And it is like, there. It's probably fueled a little bit by rebellion. This is why your, you know, when you tried to do the PG13 tour, that just doing one episode or one episode, one show was felt so terrible because this is uniquely your work in the world is to.

[Valerie Chaney]

It's so much more British punk style.

[Pete Holmes]

Rebel against this, this, like, tradition.

[Valerie Chaney]

Right.

[Pete Holmes]

And you really are sort of like to make. I mean, you shared. And I. And maybe you wanted to share this too, that, that this kind of became generational for you in this therapy session that you saw that. That's like your father had to keep up the facade and his father had to keep up the facade.

[Valerie Chaney]

That's the feeling. I.

[Pete Holmes]

That's the feeling.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And so really, this is something. This is what, like, healing generational trauma is if, if we're not all sick of hearing that, because it is very real. It's like the gift that you've given your lineage is like, you're the first resourced male in sort of this, you know, modern time where men are allowed to be softer and more reflective. Where you've gotten, like, you are the first generation that is able to drop the facade. And so you actually kind of are. Even if your dad never knows or always feels uncomfortable with you doing that, you are sort of doing it for him and his father in the lineage. Like, you're saying, I know you aren't safe enough to do this, but that's.

[Valerie Chaney]

That'S what you do with privilege. Yeah, right.

[Pete Holmes]

That's exactly what we do.

[Valerie Chaney]

Both of those men afforded me this life and, and the, the world that I live in that allowed me to go like, boy, like. Because when I go, oh, they were holding up these facades. If they were doing that, it's because they felt like they had to.

[Pete Holmes]

Oh, absolutely.

[Valerie Chaney]

So I'm going, I, wow, on your shoulders, I'll run forward. And when I'm breaking it, it's not. Not destroying them. But at the same time, I don't know if. I don't know. I don't know if I'll ever have, like, an honest share with my family about that. It's just kind of like my own thing.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah. And I don't know, to get a little mystical about it. I do feel like there's Like a soul sort of connection that's underneath all of the personality and ego and that is benefiting from your healing. So even if they never. You never really get to have a conversation about it or they never really see it. I do think it's like your souls are connecting through it.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

Through the. You know, and. Yeah. I mean, I now have a really, really good relationship with my mom, but when I was pregnant. And I always have had a good relationship, but when I was pregnant, I felt very much like I was sort of processing the anxiety that she had when I was in her womb because she had had a miscarriage and, you know, and then was in early labor with me and. And, like, you know, I guess there were times where that felt like a burden, but mostly it just made me feel incredibly close to my mom, that I was like. Like resourced enough to process her pain.

[Valerie Chaney]

Well, yeah.

[Pete Holmes]

And then it made me close. Feel close to Leela because I'm like, I'm doing this so that this never gets to you.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah. It's interesting. Even you bringing up generations and my family, it's very uncomfortable for me, but I'm. No, it's just because it's new to me, and I'm trying to do it in a respectful and loving way, not in, like, just, like, what you're saying. It's like, this is actually giving us. Us this relationship. There's, like, we're connected in this way.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

And it's beautiful.

[Pete Holmes]

Absolutely. Yeah, totally. And I think that is. Yeah. I think there can be a through line and. And there's something that I just got on my Instagram that was beautiful. That was like a prayer. And it was sort of like, I release my parents and my grandparents for. It was like releasing all the. All these things that you're tied to and, like. And I release them for. For feeling like they've failed me, like, from. From that feeling. It's like. Right. Like, there is sort of a freedom in going. Everybody did the best they could with the level of consciousness that they had.

[Valerie Chaney]

That's right. You know, and I am, too.

[Pete Holmes]

And I am.

[Valerie Chaney]

And the next generations will do better.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

And we'll just keep doing better and better and better.

[Pete Holmes]

Yeah.

[Valerie Chaney]

Yeah, Yeah. I mean, this has been fun. We're glad you made it. Weird. As produced by Katie Levine and Joe Faria. On the video side, social postings are done by Jake Rohert. Thank you, as always to Valerie Chaney. Valerie Lace.

[Pete Holmes]

Keep it crispy.