We Made It Weird #256 - You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes

Summary5 min read

Podcast Summary: You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes

Episode: We Made It Weird #256
Date: June 19, 2026
Host: Pete Holmes
Co-Host: Valerie

Episode Overview

This episode is a classic "We Made It Weird" free-flowing Friday catch-up between Pete Holmes and his wife, Valerie. The vibe is relaxed, playful, and intimate—think “banana pancakes meets Mac Miller” (07:13). Pete and Val riff on everything from the weirdness of daily life and family dynamics to self-improvement, masculinity, body image, parenting, and the ways in which social and technological change impact their world. Interspersed with their signature silliness and improvisational humor, they delve into thoughtful discussions about humility, gender roles, and generational parenting challenges.

Key Topics & Insights

1. Kickoff Vibes & Setting the Mood (00:21 – 09:00)

Chill summer energy with “laughs and learning” (00:25).
Episode compared to a “7 up with a splash of grenadine—Shirley Temple” (00:34–00:43).
Early banter about Valerie accidentally dropping something, Pete’s relentless puns, and a running joke of calling each other "Valerie" as if in trouble (01:50).
Pete references comedy tour dates, Mac Miller obsession, and the quirky, meta energy of their “Friday catch-up” episodes.

2. Playing with Pop Culture & AI (03:25 – 10:53)

Silly, meandering conversation about which Disney characters the Seinfeld cast would be—Elaine as Minnie, George as Donald, Kramer as Goofy.
Pete tries to use AI (Gemini/ChatGPT) to answer “Who is the wryest Disney character?” only for it to suggest obscure answers (06:05–06:18).
Reflection on the “inevitability” and marketing of AI, noting its miraculous yet flawed outputs (10:05–10:53).

Memorable Quote:

“It is a miracle on one hand… for all the good science there’s some goofy science.” – Pete Holmes (12:35)

3. Self-Improvement, Humility, and Growing Older (15:38 – 21:41)

Pete reflects on seeing himself talking about Christ online and realizes the importance of humility: “If you’re humble, you’ll never stumble.” (16:36)
Discussion of being a “blowhard” vs. “dullard,” balancing having opinions with listening.
Valerie sincerely affirms Pete’s commitment to self-improvement (“You set out to do something, you really do.” – 20:27).

4. Changing Habits & Food/Diet Culture (26:19 – 34:50)

Pete jokes about his ever-shifting food preferences and the need for friends to ask “What is Pete eating these days?” (21:08).
Detailed story about a conversation with Rob Delaney at a Hollywood party, who lost weight by cutting out sugar and wheat, which inspires Pete’s latest diet experiment (40:36–43:02).
Candid admissions about the difficulty in finding a balanced relationship with food, both for themselves and as parents.

Memorable Moment:

“When you invite Pete over to dinner, you have to say: what’s Pete eating these days? Because it’s changing.” – Valerie (21:08)

5. Parenting, Body Image, and Generational Influence (43:15 – 55:16)

Honest and vulnerable discussion about their daughter Leela’s awareness of body image, sparked by her saying, “I look fat” (43:21).
Importance of counter-programming societal messages about bodies, with Valerie advocating for proud, positive ownership of her “soft belly” and discussing with Leela how social pressures make women feel small (48:13–48:50).
Pete and Valerie reflect on inherited body image attitudes from their own parents and the challenge of raising a child with healthier views (51:49–52:42).

Notable Quotes:

"Girls are really strong. You’re one of the strongest people I know, and you’re a girl!” – Valerie (68:16)
“The example matters more than what you’re saying.” – Valerie (52:18)

6. Gender Roles & Relationship Dynamics (32:45 – 38:16)

Exploration of their “accidentally more traditional” relationship roles compared to their peers, and how these dynamics are shifting for their generation (33:12–37:48).
Pete admits, “I’m just so uncomfortable with the question of who’s supposed to do what in a relationship... I’d rather do what we’re doing, which is a madhouse” (37:48).

7. Silliness & Cultural Parlor Games (61:23 – 67:08)

Return to comparing Seinfeld characters to Disney characters and sodas, with witty justifications and banter about AI’s limitations.
Example: "Elaine is Diet Coke: sharp, efficient, no-nonsense, and secretly more popular than the originals.” (64:16)

8. On Technology & Parenting (66:13 – 68:44)

Pete and Val discuss how kids can mistake machines (toys, AI) for living things if they mimic human behaviors, drawing analogies between stuffed animals/voice boxes and current-day AI (66:32–67:08).
Efforts to counter negative media influence (“Bread Barbershop”) and to show Leela strong female role models (Linda Hamilton in Terminator 2) (67:24–68:16).

Notable Quotes & Timestamps

On humility and opinions:
“I’m an excitable boy… sometimes you don’t have to be like, well, that’s what the Transfiguration means. Maybe leave that to the people who know Greek.” – Pete (17:00–18:10)
On generational body image:
“The example matters more than what you’re saying.” – Valerie (52:18)
On growing older together:
“I think you look so much better as you get older. You just look better and better.” – Valerie (13:27)
On taking risks:
“Everything’s a risk. So just take the risk that you want to take, that you would wish others would take.” – Pete (30:56)
On AI tools:
“AI or LLMs are a teddy bear with a voice box that a baby thinks is real. And we’re the baby.” – Pete (67:08)
On parenting imperfection:
“Would ever be done healing this stuff?… So we’re just doing the best we can and it’s a mess. And it’s okay.” – Valerie (61:14–61:19)

Useful Timestamps

00:25 – “7 up energy”/episode description
06:05 – Seinfeld/Disney connection + AI goofs
10:05 – On AI inevitability/marketing
15:38 – Pete’s humility reflection
16:36 – “If you’re humble, you’ll never stumble”
21:08 – “What’s Pete eating these days?”
33:12 – Relationship and gender roles
40:36 – Rob Delaney’s “no sugar, no wheat” diet
48:13 – Valerie’s advice against shrinking for others
52:18 – Influence of parental example
61:23 – Seinfeld/Disney/soda game
67:24 – Strong women role models for Leela

Final Thoughts

This episode blends weirdness, warmth, and wisdom, exemplifying why fans tune in: Pete and Valerie’s comedic chemistry, their introspective honesty, and their willingness to expose both their quirks and vulnerabilities. Whether they’re dissecting AI’s cultural impact, navigating modern parenting, or just laughing about soda brands, listeners are reminded that everyone has their secret weirdness, and embracing it—together or alone—is what really keeps life crispy.

Loading summary

Transcript620 lines

[00:02]
Pete Holmes
Lemonade. Yes, you did. You made it weird with Pete Holmes.
[00:21]
Valerie
What's happening, weirdos?
[00:23]
Pete Holmes
Hey, everybody.
[00:24]
Valerie
Happy June.
[00:25]
Pete Holmes
Happy June. It's. We were joking. It's kind of like a. It's a chill episode, but with laughs. With laughs. There's laughs and there's learning.
[00:35]
Valerie
I think this episode was 7 up. I think that this was a 7 up episode.
[00:39]
Pete Holmes
This was a 7 up episode. There might be a splash of grenadine in there.
[00:44]
Valerie
Ooh, a little Shelley Tempo.
[00:46]
Pete Holmes
Silly, silly Fun Boys on YouTube. I'm not for everyone who's on YouTube. I'm going to be at Largo. Oh, this will come out Friday. So Largo already happened, but I do Largo here in LA every month. North Carolina, South Carolina, Sacramento. All these dates are on PeteHomes.com I believe Maine is on there. My book spells to cast on your parents is available for pre order now. Verona, Vancouver, St. Louis, Obispo, Madison. And thank you to everybody that came out to Denver. They were awesome shows. And Seattle and Portland. Anyway, we're so. This is a great.
[01:22]
Valerie
Sorry, what was that? I was trying to turn it and it. And it slipped out of my hands.
[01:28]
Pete Holmes
Weird. Yep, that's what she said.
[01:30]
Valerie
Yep. I was trying to turn it.
[01:34]
Pete Holmes
Val's great. She's always turning.
[01:37]
Valerie
I like to take a little turn.
[01:39]
Pete Holmes
Valerie.
[01:40]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
To the left.
[01:40]
Valerie
To the right. Valerie.
[01:42]
Pete Holmes
And well, we're so glad you're here. This is the Friday episodes where Valerie and I catch up and we're so glad. It's one of my faves. Valerie.
[01:51]
Valerie
I love that you're calling me Valerie right now. I feel like I'm kind of in trouble. Valerie, get into it.
[01:58]
Pete Holmes
I'm Hasan Minhaj and I have been lying to you. I only pretended to be a comedian so I could trick important people into coming on my podcast. Hasan Minhaj doesn't know to ask them the tough questions that real journalists are way too afraid to ask. People like Senator Elizabeth Warren. Is America too dumb for democracy?
[02:17]
Valerie
Outrageous.
[02:18]
Pete Holmes
Parenting expert Dr. Becky. How do you skip consequences without raising a psychopath? That's a good question. And astrophysicist Neil Degrasse Tyson. I have never done drugs ever in my life.
[02:30]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
Okay.
[02:31]
Pete Holmes
You Muslim? No. Okay. We'd love to have you listen to Hasan Minhaj. Doesn't know. From Lemonada Media. Wherever you get your podcasts, are you
[02:39]
Valerie
looking for ways to make your everyday life happier, healthier, more productive, and more creative? I'm Gretchen Rubin, the number one bestselling author of the Happiness Project, bringing you fresh insights and practical solutions in The Happier with Gretchen Rubin podcast. My co host and happiness guinea pig is my sister, Elizabeth Craft. That's me, Elizabeth Craft, a TV writer and producer in Hollywood. Join us as we explore ideas and hacks about cultivating happiness and good habits. Check out Happier with Gretchen Rubin from Lemonada Media.
[03:11]
Pete Holmes
Hello.
[03:12]
Valerie
Hello, everybody. Welcome to the show.
[03:16]
Pete Holmes
It's the place where the people wanted to know about Pete and Val and B.
[03:26]
Valerie
And I lost it.
[03:29]
Pete Holmes
There's two crabs. They're the con.
[03:34]
Valerie
Wow. I didn't know I could literally say anything.
[03:37]
Pete Holmes
There's two crabs. They're the con.
[03:44]
Valerie
Two of the crabs. Two crabs are. Okay. I just wanted to.
[03:49]
Pete Holmes
There's no concierges.
[03:52]
Valerie
No concierge.
[03:54]
Pete Holmes
This is Jason and Malcolm. They're the concierge.
[03:59]
Valerie
I mean, desk. I don't think there's ever two concierge.
[04:04]
Pete Holmes
That's part of the allure.
[04:05]
Valerie
It's just one guy.
[04:07]
Pete Holmes
You want a con at a hotel.
[04:09]
Valerie
It could be a woman, but it often is. Yeah, but also, I always think of it as a guy. I don't know why. I guess because Pretty Woman. I think the guy just saw Jason Alexander. Oh, my God. Remember? Yeah, I do remember. From yesterday.
[04:25]
Pete Holmes
No, I mean, remember he was in Pretty Woman, but of course you do.
[04:28]
Valerie
Oh, yeah, of course I do.
[04:30]
Pete Holmes
When I see him, I don't. When I see my friend Jason Alexander, it is sort of like a weird feeling. I did his podcast yesterday and it was wonderful, and he did this podcast, and both times I've seen him, he's just been such a delight. And it. It is weird being with, like. I'm not saying I think of him as Chester Cheetah or Tony the Tiger. Yeah, or Donald Duck. That's who he is. He's dumb Seinfeld. Disney. Go.
[04:58]
Valerie
Oh, Jerry.
[04:59]
Pete Holmes
Mickey.
[04:59]
Valerie
Kramer is goofy.
[05:00]
Pete Holmes
Kramer.
[05:01]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
Goofy.
[05:01]
Valerie
100%.
[05:02]
Pete Holmes
George.
[05:02]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
Donald.
[05:04]
Pete Holmes
Elaine.
[05:05]
Valerie
Elaine. Minnie. Yeah. I mean, if she's any of the girls, she's Minnie, but she's probably not really the girl. She might be more like. Who's Rye?
[05:19]
Pete Holmes
Rye? You mean Rye?
[05:22]
Valerie
No, W, R, Y. Oh.
[05:25]
Pete Holmes
Who has the quality of ryness? Which of these concierge have the quality of Rynas?
[05:30]
Valerie
What's the wry est Disney character?
[05:34]
Pete Holmes
Oh, my God. Can I please. We don't do a lot of Googling on this show, but who is the wryest Disney character? Character. Did I spell Rios correctly? Who is the worst? No, I don't want worse Cluck from Chicken Little.
[05:51]
Valerie
Certain. With so much certainty.
[05:53]
Pete Holmes
Who is the wry est.
[05:56]
Valerie
I mean, stop. I can't even believe that you Think there's going to be an answer for this?
[06:00]
Pete Holmes
Okay, who is the most wry Disney character?
[06:05]
Valerie
Oh, there you go.
[06:06]
Pete Holmes
It fixed it. When fans talk about the most rye, dryly sarcastic characters, they talk of Magara from Hercules.
[06:14]
Valerie
Okay.
[06:15]
Pete Holmes
What? And Nick Wild from Zootopia. That's who she is.
[06:18]
Valerie
She's Nick.
[06:19]
Pete Holmes
Wait, wait. No, she isn't.
[06:20]
Valerie
No, she's not.
[06:21]
Pete Holmes
Damn it. I thought maybe she was.
[06:23]
Valerie
Well, also, it's like how she's hops.
[06:26]
Pete Holmes
No, no. Okay, let's just do that. Look, guys, welcome to our Tuesday. We're motherfucking happy to be sitting down and talking. We're motherfucking, motherfucking happy to be doing it. We're living life. It's a little bit Summer vibes. I want to tell. I want to tell. Let me. It seems like an African thing. I want. I'm not going to do the voice.
[06:48]
Valerie
Victor.
[06:49]
Pete Holmes
Oh, hey, Victor. And then I'm going to say. What am I going to say? What am I Googling? Why are they right behind me?
[06:55]
Valerie
Are you going to ask? They're making faces. I'm just kidding. Were you going to just say, what Disney character is Julia Louis Dreyfus?
[07:04]
Pete Holmes
Yeah, but I just want everyone to know the vibe of this podcast that you just threw on. It's like chill times. It's like a little Jack Johnson, but like a little Mac Miller.
[07:14]
Valerie
It's a little like, make a banana pancake.
[07:17]
Pete Holmes
You're making a banana pancake. But someone's going. Yep.
[07:19]
Valerie
Yeah. I mean, we are so into Mac Miller. And if you've listened to this podcast the last couple episodes, you know, I. Like, I am deep in. I'm gonna say it. I'm sprung, remember?
[07:32]
Pete Holmes
Is that what people say?
[07:33]
Valerie
Remember saying sprung?
[07:34]
Pete Holmes
I thought that meant broken out of prison.
[07:36]
Valerie
No, I mean, I think it did back in Europe.
[07:39]
Pete Holmes
Elaine Bennett is not officially a Disney character. I know people, okay? However. Oh, however.
[07:46]
Valerie
She is the right.
[07:47]
Pete Holmes
Okay, look, look. I know I'm all. Every episode of this podcast. I met a really nice fan. Well, I met her again. Named Amy. Shout out to Amy, who came back in to say hello in Denver. Why am I doing this? Why am I doing this? So weird.
[08:05]
Valerie
No, why are you being so weird?
[08:07]
Pete Holmes
Why?
[08:07]
Valerie
You had sex with Amy, didn't you?
[08:10]
Pete Holmes
Yes. No. Why did I bring that up?
[08:14]
Valerie
Because I think Victor's maybe trying to get her.
[08:17]
Pete Holmes
Well, we're working,
[08:20]
Valerie
okay? He can probably hear us.
[08:23]
Pete Holmes
I'm allowed to say with some snoot, we're working. Don't you. There's microphones in front of Our faces.
[08:29]
Valerie
Yes.
[08:30]
Pete Holmes
I guess I was a kind of a bitch just then. I don't know. I think why I thought of Amy was because she wrote me this really, really nice letter and there was no way for me to say thank you. There was an email or anything. So I'm saying thank you on the pod.
[08:42]
Valerie
Yeah.
[08:43]
Pete Holmes
And it was just filled with, like, a deep appreciation for everything about these we made it weird episodes. And it really meant a lot to me. I don't have as much engagement with fans. I used to do meet and greets and all this sort of stuff. So I'd hear a lot of nice feedback and stuff. So this was like a little. Little snuck in.
[09:01]
Valerie
Yeah.
[09:01]
Pete Holmes
I don't mean she snuck in, but it snuck in these nice comments and like. So us playing who? The riot. Elaine character? Whatever the. I'm trying to say.
[09:10]
Valerie
Yes.
[09:10]
Pete Holmes
I'm just like, there are people that want this vibe and who are well aware and tracking our joint obsession with Mac Miller. Yeah, okay.
[09:19]
Valerie
We love him.
[09:20]
Pete Holmes
This is. Oh, So I was saying. That's what I was saying. Like,
[09:26]
Valerie
sorry, this is so weird happening to you.
[09:30]
Pete Holmes
It's great. This is my point. Okay, well, that was because I had to cough inter. Because AI just answered. And it was like I said, which Disney character is Elaine Ben? Which is a question I am asking Gemini, basically. Yeah, I wanted to do that. And it did sort of fail. And it is a miracle on one hand. And. And this is my one per episode. Like, the sentiment that AI is inevitable because the people who made AI say it's inevitable. Like, it really seems. Don't you feel that that's like, more in the cultural landscape ethos? If Elaine. Sorry, go ahead.
[10:06]
Valerie
It is. It is marketing. Like, we forget that a lot of this AI panic is. Is marketing.
[10:13]
Pete Holmes
Well, it's also. I talked about this the other week, that it's hallucinating more. And, like, so it's slopping more. People are just kind of getting. Again, I want to hold both hands here. On one hand. It's doing some of the most incredible things in the world. And also, it's just kind of like it's. I said this and I want it like, you can go back. It's never what you think it is. No, we have these guesses, and then it's always something else. If Elaine Bennett were a Disney character and now we go to. She would be Megan from Hercules. Nobody knows that. Oh, sorry, Magara. Nobody knows Megara. This sucks. This. This. Yeah, this AI.
[10:54]
Valerie
I mean, I do see that. I do see that. If you.
[10:56]
Pete Holmes
You know Hercules.
[10:57]
Valerie
Yeah, yeah. Oh, I know Hercules. Hercules.
[11:00]
Pete Holmes
Hercules.
[11:00]
Valerie
It's not that. It's not from that.
[11:03]
Pete Holmes
That's. That's so close to being something we should like. White white folks shouldn't say it might be Hercules.
[11:10]
Valerie
Hercules. Yeah.
[11:11]
Pete Holmes
Because it's just Southern.
[11:13]
Valerie
Yeah.
[11:13]
Pete Holmes
Just Southern.
[11:15]
Valerie
It's Southern. It's from the South.
[11:17]
Pete Holmes
It's a Southern. It's more of a Southern thing than a black. It was a black man pretending to be a black woman talking to a real heavy kid. That's what I always thought was so funny. Look, I'm not. You are worried.
[11:31]
Valerie
I am terrified. I'm terrified.
[11:32]
Pete Holmes
I'm just saying there's something funny about 12 Eddie Murphy's a table and one real heavy kid. I'm just saying it was a heavier kid.
[11:41]
Valerie
Yeah.
[11:42]
Pete Holmes
I'm just talking metrics.
[11:44]
Valerie
Yeah.
[11:45]
Pete Holmes
The median. Oh, that's not. Okay. We can't talk about them. I mean this. I'm like. Now I'm calling bullshit. We can't say there's a median weight. Although I will say shifting away from what I think is hilarious that there were eight Eddie Murphy's. I dropped it from 12. And one real kid. I'll just say, kid, I don't need to own his body.
[12:06]
Valerie
Yes.
[12:06]
Pete Holmes
I don't need to have any comment on it. That's what I mean. I don't need to have any take on his body. That is super funny. But it's also like the 80s into the 90s. Yes. Everybody was like. And this is the POV Bill Burr is like yelling about when he yells about these things. You know what I mean? Because in our childhoods, every doctor was like, well, you're not the average weight. Like, that was like science.
[12:35]
Valerie
Yeah.
[12:35]
Pete Holmes
For all the good science. There's some goofy science. There's some goofy science.
[12:41]
Valerie
I know.
[12:41]
Pete Holmes
And that was your doctor literally going like, you could. I told you. I went to a doctor that had a. In la. I think that's weird because. And then he had a wheel.
[12:51]
Valerie
My.
[12:51]
Pete Holmes
A BMI wheel. And he was like, you're obese. And this is when I was on the Pete Holmes show. Give it a goo. If you have a crush on me. Like, just take a peek.
[13:00]
Valerie
I mean.
[13:00]
Pete Holmes
Premium.
[13:01]
Valerie
Premium.
[13:02]
Pete Holmes
Although I think he looks like a little baby.
[13:04]
Valerie
I think he looks so much now.
[13:05]
Pete Holmes
Oh, Grazia. Prego. I thought you were going to say better than Grazia. You go. I thought you were going to say,
[13:11]
Valerie
I think you look better.
[13:12]
Pete Holmes
I was worried that you loved that. That slender man in red pants to the.
[13:18]
Valerie
To your point, that is the version of you that I fell in love with, but that's just a timing thing. I would have fallen in love with any version that I met.
[13:26]
Pete Holmes
But I say yes. Yes.
[13:27]
Valerie
But I think you look so much better as you get older. You just look better and better.
[13:33]
Pete Holmes
Yeah.
[13:33]
Valerie
With, you know, maybe the exception of the pandemic, which was true for all of us.
[13:38]
Pete Holmes
Yeah. The pandemic was like the back of your medicine cabinet.
[13:41]
Valerie
Sometimes I get pictures of us on, you know, like my phone recommends, and I'm like, I don't want to see that.
[13:47]
Pete Holmes
That's a weird thing. Like, with all respect there, if we had iPhones through all of history.
[13:52]
Valerie
Yeah.
[13:53]
Pete Holmes
And there's like the blitzkrieg. Well, the blitzkrieg was in Germany, I believe. But like, they're bombing London. Would the memories. Would the memories app, would Apple have gone into the software and been like, no memories from this period? Like, nobody wants the bomb shelter.
[14:12]
Valerie
Can they figure that out?
[14:14]
Pete Holmes
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. And clearly the answer is no. Although during the pandemic, there was a lot of mattress on floor.
[14:21]
Valerie
I know. There was sweet moments.
[14:23]
Pete Holmes
A lot of postmates. So many postmates made a bill.
[14:27]
Valerie
Oh, my God.
[14:27]
Pete Holmes
Postmates made a bill.
[14:29]
Valerie
I mean, you just said the other day, you're like, can you believe that happen? Oh, yeah. Because we passed a street that was called Quarantina.
[14:37]
Pete Holmes
Quarantine. A street.
[14:39]
Valerie
Where was that terrible. It was. I think it was in Ohio. Or maybe it was Santa Barbara.
[14:44]
Pete Holmes
I think it was Santa Barbara for some reason.
[14:46]
Valerie
Yeah, it was. And I just like, Can I say go ahead. No, I have no. No interesting take here. I just can't believe the pandemic happened. And we're still like, I. I get
[14:57]
Pete Holmes
mad that people don't. Well, I'm sure millions of people do. I feel like in most circles it's a gratitude thing. Like when I'm doing a show, I'm like, I can't believe, like, it's always in my mind a little bit that I'm like, remember. Yeah, this used to be like, outside and like, stand up comedians had a stand up comedian.
[15:16]
Valerie
Stand up comedian.
[15:17]
Pete Holmes
Stand up comedians. Stand up comedians. Stand up comedians was interesting for stand up comedians. We really had our finger on the balls of how. Just fucking shut up. I've decided you're going to laugh. I've decided to be more humble.
[15:35]
Valerie
Okay.
[15:38]
Pete Holmes
That is us. That's it.
[15:42]
Valerie
Oh, my God.
[15:43]
Pete Holmes
I'll tell you because I saw a clip of me online and I was blabbing. About what Christ means. And I was watching. It was a. It was a. Somebody was, like, reacting to it. I didn't watch it, but I got a sense of what it was. And it was like somebody who probably clearly knows all those words and all those terms, like a theologian, I'm guessing, didn't watch it, but I watched it enough to see me blabbing and boring. And I was like, I've been thinking about this a lot. I don't know what Christ means. I'm telling you. I'm telling you. I'm telling you. And this isn't like, political, like, going back, walking anything back. I'm saying, like, I'm wrong all the time. And when you're talking about, like, people's religion and you come on as the weird guest who's like, into mysticism, and then you start defining their. With respect. Like, I like Christ. I'm I'm just saying, like, their terms.
[16:37]
Valerie
Yeah, yeah.
[16:38]
Pete Holmes
I was watching and I was like, oh, here I am checking myself after I've wrecked myself and it's okay. But I thought of Father Greg Boyle, who. One of his, like, daily mantras is, if you're humble, you'll never stumble. I couldn't say it. If you're humble, you'll never stumble. And I was just like, I sort of. I'm an excitable boy.
[17:00]
Valerie
Yeah, you are.
[17:01]
Pete Holmes
I'm an excitable boy. No, I know. I have a lot of love for me and how I am. And there's a hose, like, quality. And there's like. There's even. It's more than a hose. It's like the energy of a man being chased by bees. Like, I come into a room and I close the door and I'm just so happy to be away from those bees.
[17:19]
Valerie
Yeah. And you have a lot to say.
[17:21]
Pete Holmes
And I got a lot to say. I got a lot to say.
[17:23]
Valerie
I got a lot to say.
[17:25]
Pete Holmes
But even though I am joking, they're actually so. Talk about getting better looking as I get older. I'm late to the game, but I really do wanna start going. Like, if someone's like, what does Christ mean? Just say, like, this is what it means to me, or this is how I interpret it, or this is how I've come to understand it and just concede.
[17:46]
Valerie
Yeah.
[17:46]
Pete Holmes
And by the way, I didn't watch the video. For all I know, the guy was on in quotes, my side. I'm just saying, like, I realized I need to check myself.
[17:55]
Valerie
Yeah.
[17:55]
Pete Holmes
And I think that's something. If you're lucky you get to live long enough where you go like, okay, there aren't bees after me. Calm the fuck down. Yeah, I like that. I have a lot to give and a lot to say. But it's also like, sometimes you don't have to be like, well, that's what the transfiguration is.
[18:11]
Valerie
Yeah.
[18:11]
Pete Holmes
You know, it's like, maybe leave that to the people who know Greek.
[18:15]
Valerie
You know what I mean?
[18:17]
Pete Holmes
You know what I mean? Because you're actually talking to the Internet.
[18:21]
Valerie
Yeah. Yeah.
[18:21]
Pete Holmes
You know, like, I, I. You're talking not just to the person you're talking to. So, like, I can get the ball and run real fast and real far with it. Because maybe I'm not talking to somebody who knows Greek. But you are talking to thousands of people who do know Greek. And it's just giving them. I don't feel, like, victimized. I'm just saying it's too big of a target. You're an idiot. You're being like, idiots too strong.
[18:42]
Valerie
You're being a blowhard.
[18:44]
Pete Holmes
A blow hard.
[18:45]
Valerie
Yeah.
[18:46]
Pete Holmes
I am a guy on a boat and I have a jug. One of those, like, moonshine jugs. And like, even back then, when there was almost no social mores, the sailors would get together and be like, stay away from Chatty Pete. Like, that was. But I also knew that if I don't chat everyone up on the boat, they're gonna realize I'm real bad at hammering planks and shit.
[19:10]
Valerie
Yeah.
[19:10]
Pete Holmes
And I don't know what side starboard
[19:12]
Valerie
is like, Chatty Pete.
[19:14]
Pete Holmes
And then. Oh, that's great. That's helpful. Because the person that watch out for Chatty Pete, don't let him corner you. The other guy is like, Yar. But there's a lot of hours in the sea bound day.
[19:24]
Valerie
Yeah, that's right. And you need entertainment.
[19:28]
Pete Holmes
Yeah. Podcasts used to just be guys.
[19:31]
Valerie
What? What do you mean?
[19:32]
Pete Holmes
Just some guy you knew.
[19:33]
Valerie
Yeah. Oh, yeah. It was like there were podcasts. There was just a guy, not quite a. Yeah. That would talk the more than everyone else and just keep talking.
[19:43]
Pete Holmes
Yeah. They used to call that the life of the party or. Or an absolute boar. That's a bad podcast. A dullard or a blowhard.
[19:52]
Valerie
Yeah.
[19:53]
Pete Holmes
And life used to be a podcast you couldn't turn off.
[19:55]
Valerie
Yeah.
[19:56]
Pete Holmes
Now we have noise canceling headphones on our phones.
[19:58]
Valerie
And the life of the party and blowhard crossover is. I mean, I think you can't really have one without the other.
[20:05]
Pete Holmes
Thank you for this conversation.
[20:07]
Valerie
I think this is a great. I support This, I love this motion to be more humble and so that I won't stumble. So that you won't stumble. And here's the cool thing about you is like, I think you'll do it like I do.
[20:24]
Pete Holmes
Yeah. I love when you say this. I love it because it encourages me.
[20:28]
Valerie
Yeah.
[20:28]
Pete Holmes
You go like you set out to
[20:29]
Valerie
do something you really do.
[20:31]
Pete Holmes
That makes me happy.
[20:32]
Valerie
Happen over 13 years. So many times.
[20:36]
Pete Holmes
A lot of my. I love my folks. This isn't anti my folks, but they weren't like, I gotta take it easy on red meat. Like, I never, I never saw like a goal and then an application of the goal that I saw.
[20:49]
Valerie
Yes. And there is sort of like a thing, you know, Like I, you know, it's. You kind of always have a thing, you know, it's like, what's the thing now? What are you eating these days? You're the type of person that it is. It's important if you invite over to dinner that you say, like, what is Pete eating these days? Because it's changing.
[21:09]
Pete Holmes
Nothing makes me feel more loved. So I was just in Denver and I saw my friend Sam, Our friend Sam Spam and Smell. We talk about them on the pot all the time. And we got sushi and Sam was. It was so perfect. So Sam is the boyfriend. Yeah, he's my boyfriend who moved away. And so when we talk about the updates on my looking for male friendship, which I do have some updates, but like Sam is the one that sort of got away. They are coming back. But I'm such a sensitive ninny that I'm like, I'll believe it when I see it. Even though I'm sure they are.
[21:42]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
Yeah.
[21:43]
Pete Holmes
I came home last night from a big tour and I was really having a hard time shifting from tour mode to family mode and just unwinding, relaxing, and merging back into my everyday routine. And that's where dad Grass and their amazing leisure drinks came to the rescue. Quite frankly, I'm obsessed with their leisure drinks and dad Grass everything they do. But leisure drinks are sparkling yuzu flavored cans that ship legally to all 50 states if you're over 21. And each one has 3 grams, which is the perfect dose for me. 3 milligrams of THC and 6 milligrams of CBD to give you that right mix of happy and relaxed with absolutely no hangover. And they're stackable, obviously for a bigger buzz and fast acting you'll feel in about 10, 20 minutes. But it's also really nice to just have one and feel light and just kind of ease into what's happening. Why is it that so many weed products are supercharged and send you into outer space when you just want to take the edge off? That's where dad Grass comes in. Feel a little giggly with our friends while keeping our feet on the ground. Get leisure drinks and all of dad Grass's products including their joints and gummies at dadgrass.com weird use promo code weird for 20% off these are amazing at parties when I put them out people grab them so fast and they taste amazing. Also their joints and gummies are incredible. Go to dadgrass.com weird and use promo code weird for 20% off. Quick fun fact did you know that helping old dolphins is actually leading to breakthroughs in human health? That's what C15 from Fatty 15 is all about. It's the first essential fatty acid to be discovered in more than 90 years and it's all about supporting long term health and healthy aging. Fatty 15 co founder Dr. Stephanie Van Watson discovered C15 while working with the US Navy to improve the health of aging dolphins. And now, Based on over 100 studies, we know C15 helps strengthen our cells, which is kind of everything because when your cells are healthy, your whole body benefits. When we don't have enough C15, our cells can get fragile and age faster. And since about one in three people have low levels, this is a big deal. Fatt 15 helps repair age related damage to cells, protect them, and support things like sleep, mood, energy and metabolism. In fact, 70% of people reported benefits within 16 weeks, which is pretty wild. Personally, I love it because I like anything that feels like I'm investing in my future self without having to think too hard about it. It's simple. It's one of those easy daily things you do that can add up. Fatty 15 was developed for healthy aging at every stage of life from kids to grandparents, and it comes in capsules and gummies so it's easy to stick with and fatty 15. It's on a mission to support healthy aging for all, including all ages and all stages of life. And you can get an additional 15% off their 90 day subscription starter kit by going to fatty15.com weird using promo code weird at checkout. This episode is brought to us by our friends at Apollo Neuro. I've talked a lot about the Apollo Neuro. I've worn it for years and I want to specifically talk to you about how it's helped me with my sleep. I used to think that I was just like a Habitually bad sleeper. Like it was some sort of character flaw. My body would feel exhausted, but my nervous system was still awake. Making all these PowerPoint presentations in my mind of things, awkward things I said that I maybe didn't even really say. It's awful. So I eventually found out that I was spending way too much time trying to calm my mind, but not enough time calming my body. And that's what Apollo is. It's a little wearable that sends gentle vibrations to your nervous system. Not like your phone buzzing with bad news. It's more of a sub perceptual vibration, a quiet signal in a body language that your body understands that says, hey buddy, you are okay. Of course I was skeptical at first, but when I tried it, I noticed I was falling asleep faster, staying asleep longer and waking up feeling so much more refreshed, completely chemically free, just attuning to my body, just tending to the needs of my nervous system, speaking that language that it speaks, which is touch. And now they have smart vibes AI, which adjusts the experience for you automatically, especially at night. You don't have to think about it. It helps your body stay in sleep mode instead of suddenly deciding at 3am it's the perfect time to wake up and think about everything you can't control. So if you're done with all the usual sleep stuff and still feel wired, Apollo was a huge help for me. Go to ApolloNeuro.com weird and get $99 off. That's a P O L L O n e u r-o.com weird and get 99 bucks off. But anyway, Sam was like, whatever the. He made some reference to whatever the hell I'm eating these days. And I just felt, I was like, yeah, welcome to the wild horse I'm riding.
[26:20]
Valerie
Yeah.
[26:21]
Pete Holmes
He just. It's like being on a hungry horse. He's eating vegan food now he's eating sushi. Like, what is this? He's a horse. Yeah, he's trying his best.
[26:31]
Valerie
Yeah, but the, But I mean, that's not even a downside. But the very, very like admirable good side is that you always set out for these things, like external and internal, where you're like, I'm gonna do trauma therapy. And then you just like really do it. And then it becomes a.
[26:49]
Pete Holmes
That's a big part of your life. Alexander, about. Yeah, and it was such a. I was like. And I mentioned you, I was like, you said you need to see a female trauma therapist. So in this case, it was you. I, I agreed to Whatever. But I really do think you were like, you just do it. And I was like, listen. Listen to Valerie. And it changed my life.
[27:08]
Valerie
Yeah, but you so much. But you actually do make changes. I feel like it's so hard to do that. I mean, as we get older, a lot of us, like, have moments where we're like, all right, I'm. I'm doing this. Like, I'm exercising, or I'm, like, healing this, you know? Right. And then we just kind of go back to the way we were.
[27:28]
Pete Holmes
I have New Year's Day energy.
[27:30]
Valerie
You do. You kind of always do.
[27:32]
Pete Holmes
Yeah. In fact, we saw. He wouldn't mind Rob Delaney. Did we talk about that party? We went to this party.
[27:40]
Valerie
Yeah.
[27:40]
Pete Holmes
We won't mention the details. I think we shouldn't mention the details just because.
[27:44]
Valerie
Yeah.
[27:45]
Pete Holmes
I don't know. It's like. It's like when Leela goes to a birthday party, you don't want to, like, mention it because some kid might not
[27:50]
Valerie
have been invited, I guess, or. I don't know. It's just now that's. It's just obtuse to.
[27:55]
Pete Holmes
It's obtuse? Is that the word?
[27:57]
Valerie
Yeah, obtuse. I mean, I think to more. Yeah. To, like, blab about this cool party that you went to. We already have talked about it too much. We could have just said we went to this party.
[28:07]
Pete Holmes
Yeah. We stepped it out to make it less obtuse and made it more obtuse.
[28:11]
Valerie
Yeah.
[28:11]
Pete Holmes
What's obtuse mean?
[28:12]
Valerie
I think it's like a blowhard.
[28:15]
Pete Holmes
Can I say about that? Put a pin in the party. What I'm realizing, even as I'm trying to be more humble. So Sam came to one of the shows. The shows in Denver were amazing. Comedy Works is my. I mean, it might be my favorite club. It's definitely one of my favorite clubs. Maybe tied for first with other places. And Sam, who will hear this? So why did I say that? Well, because I was gonna say it's always a little annoying when my friends point out that there were people that weren't enjoying the show. Oh, I guess. And, Sam, I love you. It was fine. It didn't hurt my feelings. But it will plague me. It will bother me, and I'll think about it. Our friend Chris came to our show in Oxnard, and he mentioned someone walking out when I was talking about the God part. And I was like, well, I'll never forget that.
[29:02]
Valerie
Yeah. It's so vulnerable. You're in such a vulnerability hangover.
[29:06]
Pete Holmes
And there's a lot of denial. You know, there are people. Whenever you do a show, and I was getting brag, a lot of standing ovations, generous crowds. So even a standing ovation, like, special X Factor show, I walk back and I'm like. And I know there are people that. It wasn't for them.
[29:22]
Valerie
Right.
[29:22]
Pete Holmes
They didn't like it. And then there are people that liked it, and they didn't think they were going to like it, and then there were people that thought they were going to like it and didn't like it. But what I'm trying to say about being a blowhard is there's this risk, and I will accept the risk, but there's always a risk if you're going to be the guy that's trying to get a party going. Yeah, we're trying to get a podcast going, trying to get a show or do a show. You can't move forward without. This is an Alan Watts thing. Without there being behind you. Like, as soon as you take a step forward, there is behind you.
[29:52]
Valerie
Yeah.
[29:53]
Pete Holmes
You just made that. And as soon as you make something that somebody can like, by definition, you made something that somebody might not, in fact, certainly won't like.
[30:02]
Valerie
Yes.
[30:02]
Pete Holmes
And that is the risk all humans are taking. So if you're not a blowhard, what do I not like more than most? More than anything? A dullard. A dull person.
[30:12]
Valerie
Right. Because they're just. There's no. There's nothing to grab onto either direction.
[30:17]
Pete Holmes
So there's the risk of the. Of being loud, and there's the risk of being quiet. If you're quiet, I'm just like, what the fuck is this? What are you doing?
[30:23]
Valerie
Right.
[30:24]
Pete Holmes
We're gonna die. You gave us nothing. And then the blowhard. And look, I don't like blowhards, and I am one, so I get it. But, like, this is. Does that make sense?
[30:32]
Valerie
Absolutely. I mean, I think that's the. The balance is like. And it is not to always be pointing this out, but it is sort of the balance of masculine and feminine. It's like having a take taken up space, like, all these things, and then trying to balance that with, like, the humility. But if you just have the humility, it's not as fun to hang out with you.
[30:56]
Pete Holmes
And everything's a risk. So just like, everything's a risk. So just take the risk that you want to take that you would wish others would take.
[31:04]
Valerie
Right.
[31:05]
Pete Holmes
And I will say, to your point, I, like, had a little experience of, like, ifs internal family systems, the kind of therapy I do with a Guy, and he was wonderful. But it made me notice just how much space my Claudia, my female therapist, gives me. And this isn't just, who cares? I'm just saying, like, I'm not trying to virtue signal. I'm saying, like, it made me see how elegant and amazing and wise and magic it can be when someone unlike me knows exactly how to carve out those round pockets. And it made me real. And again, the person. The male who did it with me was fantastic. I just had never done it with anybody else. It was kind of a spontaneous thing. And it made me recognize that Claudia is really picking her moments. And I'm never feeling like she's trying to eke anything out of me. She just intuits, like, this feeling needs. Needs a lot of space, and I'm just gonna allow it. And I was like, wow.
[32:09]
Valerie
Yeah.
[32:09]
Pete Holmes
What? I'm an idiot. And I was like, wow.
[32:12]
Valerie
Yeah.
[32:12]
Pete Holmes
This is a potato chip commercial. Throw me in the dryer, high heat. No, no permanent press, because I want this. I want this guy done. I'm just kidding. Go on.
[32:25]
Valerie
Well, yeah, I do think that the. It's such an interesting thing. I think of the gifts of feminine energy are often invisible. And this is like, you know, we see these dynamics in, like, you know, every marriage is different, and every heterosexual marriage is different even.
[32:46]
Pete Holmes
Are we hetero?
[32:47]
Valerie
Are we hetero? I don't know. We haven't decided. I don't think.
[32:49]
Pete Holmes
Oh, my God, this. We are so hetero.
[32:53]
Valerie
But I. I mean, it is funny because we've talked about this too, how, like, there's a lot you think you said it's an OHI thing. And I was like, I don't think this is an OHI thing. But, like, we. We're finding that we have way more traditional roles, not by, like, a value system, just kind of accidentally.
[33:12]
Pete Holmes
Yeah.
[33:14]
Valerie
Than most of our friends. Like, most of our friends have these, like, gorgeous, wild, sparkly women. And then, like, the. The men who are, like, the solid, grounded, and they're doing the dishes and they're. And they're doing, like, domestic stuff.
[33:31]
Pete Holmes
And you were saying that's, like, happening.
[33:33]
Valerie
Yeah, I think that it's just. There's a recal. Like a good recalibration that's happening where, you know, it's obviously traditionally been like, domestic domesticity is, like, a woman's job, and we're, like, really correcting that, which feels great, but, like, we are not as much. I mean, you just helped me clean the house, and I've never been more turned on.
[33:58]
Pete Holmes
Oh, I knew it. I was cleaning up, going, I'm gonna get that.
[34:02]
Valerie
Oh, yeah. It was like.
[34:05]
Pete Holmes
But I knew. I'm actually zero out of 100 horny.
[34:09]
Valerie
But, yeah, I'm exhausted.
[34:11]
Pete Holmes
I mean, that's me. That's not just marriage. That's just like a little slice into a Tuesday when both of us are like, we have a podcast and we have, like, everything. We have to do everything before Leela's back from camp.
[34:23]
Valerie
Yes.
[34:23]
Pete Holmes
Anyway, I don't have time to bone you.
[34:27]
Valerie
Okay. I know. Well, then stop. Stop cleaning up and asking for it.
[34:32]
Pete Holmes
No, that was sweet, but I.
[34:34]
Valerie
But, you know. Yeah.
[34:35]
Pete Holmes
I was gonna say how much I enjoyed that as. As well.
[34:38]
Valerie
But I also. Yeah. Anyway, I, I. What I was gonna say is, like, you're talking about the, like, Claudia holding space for you, and holding space is like, a term that's, you know, kind of.
[34:51]
Pete Holmes
I would say she's conjuring up, like in the movie the Incredibles. The. The Violet.
[34:56]
Valerie
Yeah. That makes force field.
[34:58]
Pete Holmes
So it's much more active than it is that she's just allowing me to blab.
[35:02]
Valerie
Yes.
[35:03]
Pete Holmes
She's protecting me.
[35:04]
Valerie
That's holding my face.
[35:05]
Pete Holmes
Yeah, exactly.
[35:07]
Valerie
It takes a lot of energy.
[35:08]
Pete Holmes
I think she's certainly tired after she talks with me.
[35:11]
Valerie
But I. But yeah, and. And we all are, is what I'm saying. I'm just kidding. No, no, no, no. I'm just saying that is. There is in not. It's not only women who are doing the. Bringing the feminine to marriages is the point I'm trying to make.
[35:25]
Pete Holmes
Yeah.
[35:26]
Valerie
And often it isn'. But that is, like, an exhausting, invisible, like, important part of a relationship and a family that just gets often ignored.
[35:38]
Pete Holmes
Well, we talk about this all the time. It's like, we would be the least trad in. I love Dallas. I'm just trying to pick a place that loves their classics.
[35:46]
Valerie
Yeah.
[35:47]
Pete Holmes
And that's not even true of Dallas. So. Dallas, with respect. I'm just using you as a placeholder. Forgive me.
[35:52]
Valerie
Yeah.
[35:53]
Pete Holmes
We would be the least trad. In a classic Dallas suburb.
[35:56]
Valerie
Suburb.
[35:57]
Pete Holmes
I honestly maybe, let's say even say in the 80s, but, like, we're the most trad.
[36:01]
Valerie
Yes.
[36:02]
Pete Holmes
In California.
[36:03]
Valerie
There's a part of me that's like, God, it would. And I know people who, like, are like this, who are beautiful, empowered women. So, like, this is not a judgment. I'm. I sometimes am like, that would be. Things would be so much simpler and easier if I felt fulfilled by just the domestic stuff. If I was like, yeah, I want to just, like, have my home and make a home and have my kids and take care of them.
[36:33]
Pete Holmes
I have that. I'm like, people are watching the World Cup.
[36:37]
Valerie
Yeah.
[36:37]
Pete Holmes
But I also wouldn't have it any other way.
[36:39]
Valerie
I know me, I might as well
[36:41]
Pete Holmes
be wearing a beret. How I feel at the World Cup. Although I'm sure every Parisian loves the World cup, so I'm so wrong.
[36:46]
Valerie
Yes. I guess this is what's. What I'm feeling lately is like, you know, I don't. Like, my friends have husbands that are like, they. They're going to do. Cook and do the dishes and they're gonna unpack the car and they're gonna do all of the, like, all the stuff. And. And then I know some couples where the wife is the one that does that, but less actually. And we just don't have one of those. Like, neither.
[37:15]
Pete Holmes
I couldn't be prouder of it. In fact, it makes. Look, not because it's men, it just makes me want to barf, if I'm being honest, like, that. Anybody is like a designated take it on the chinner.
[37:27]
Valerie
But I don't know if they feel like they're taking it on the chin. I think there's some people who get really jazzed and fulfilled by that.
[37:35]
Pete Holmes
Yeah, maybe.
[37:35]
Valerie
But then I do think there are a lot of people taking it on the chin.
[37:38]
Pete Holmes
I. I'm just so uncomfortable with power dynamics. And not. Maybe not power dynamics, but, like, I'm so uncomfortable with the question of who's supposed to do what in a relationship.
[37:48]
Valerie
Yeah.
[37:49]
Pete Holmes
That I would so much rather do what we're doing, which is like a madhouse of. It's like when you eat Alphabet cereal.
[37:56]
Valerie
Yeah.
[37:57]
Pete Holmes
What are the words? There are no words. It's just letters. Just eat it.
[38:02]
Valerie
Just eat it.
[38:02]
Pete Holmes
And that's my approach.
[38:04]
Valerie
I mean, that is our approach.
[38:05]
Pete Holmes
Do the dishes and just unload the car. And sometimes you load the car and sometimes you. Whatever it might be.
[38:10]
Valerie
And then a lot of times none of it gets done because neither of us are. Because it's Alphabet types of people who do it.
[38:16]
Pete Holmes
Sorry, Alphabet.
[38:17]
Valerie
And we. Yeah, I mean, I think we're just. We're two people who really would rather do, you know, creative work. And I'm. Maybe, again, I know. I understand that there are people who are like, yes, we all would, and we just don't. But I. I don't know about that.
[38:35]
Pete Holmes
I don't think a lot of people are craving macaroni and paste. I think a lot of people are craving a cold Beer.
[38:43]
Valerie
Cold beer.
[38:44]
Pete Holmes
Cold bear. Cold bear truck.
[38:47]
Valerie
I can't remember.
[38:48]
Pete Holmes
Oh, the boson.
[38:49]
Valerie
Yeah.
[38:50]
Pete Holmes
Cold bear. I was okay. So I was gonna say at that party, that was not a big deal. Who cares?
[38:56]
Valerie
Yeah.
[38:57]
Pete Holmes
We just never go to parties.
[38:58]
Valerie
We never go to parties.
[38:59]
Pete Holmes
If we went to any party, I would be like, don't talk too much about it. It was, like, really cool. That we wanted.
[39:03]
Valerie
It was so cool.
[39:04]
Pete Holmes
Once a year.
[39:05]
Valerie
I know.
[39:06]
Pete Holmes
And, you know, I wouldn't change a thing, but, like, when you're, you know, a family, when you have kids and all that, there's less of that. And we got to go to this party. And we felt cool.
[39:17]
Valerie
Yeah.
[39:17]
Pete Holmes
I saw Rob Delaney and we felt cool. We saw Rob Delaney and he looked like a glow stick.
[39:22]
Valerie
Yeah.
[39:22]
Pete Holmes
He looked like he was emanating his own light. And this is the most me thing in the world. And he said, what are you doing? That's so LA, I guess.
[39:33]
Valerie
Yeah.
[39:33]
Pete Holmes
I don't know. Maybe it's 20, 26. Maybe St. Louis people are like, like, you look great. What did you do?
[39:39]
Valerie
Maybe.
[39:40]
Pete Holmes
Maybe.
[39:41]
Valerie
I don't think so.
[39:41]
Pete Holmes
Maybe. But I'm. I'm out there. I'm going Ozempic. Just like. I just ask people.
[39:47]
Valerie
You just point to people. Ozempic.
[39:50]
Pete Holmes
That was my first. When I opened for Rick Overton. We were eating dinner. He took us to dinner, this was in Chicago. And I got a salad, and he just pointed at me and went, atkins.
[40:02]
Valerie
Oh, yeah, I remember that.
[40:04]
Pete Holmes
Right? And I was like, what? Now I am the guy that goes, atkins. What's this? South Beach? What are you? Ozempic?
[40:10]
Valerie
But all of the references are from 20 years ago.
[40:13]
Pete Holmes
I know, but it would be GLP1. I wouldn't just. If I knew them well, I would say, are you doing a GLP one?
[40:19]
Valerie
Yeah. Yeah.
[40:20]
Pete Holmes
And it really depends on how they looked and how much weight they lost. But Rob, it wasn't really a weight loss thing. He had lost weight, but he just looked fantastic. And again, sorry to share Rob's business, but you're going to see him on, like, nine shows. He's on everything, and he looks incredible. And he said, I just stopped eating sugar and wheat.
[40:37]
Valerie
And then I was like, that's so exact.
[40:40]
Pete Holmes
Go ahead.
[40:41]
Valerie
That is like your code. That is like, he didn't even know.
[40:45]
Pete Holmes
He didn't know what he was doing.
[40:46]
Valerie
He was doing.
[40:46]
Pete Holmes
I'm like a Manchurian Candidate. You say like, sugar and wheat.
[40:51]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
Simple.
[40:51]
Pete Holmes
But I wasn't fully in yet. And this isn't that interesting, but it's almost Over. So immediately I'm like, okay, I gotta stop eating sugar and wheat. But I wasn't sure. Yeah, I had just had. At that party. Literally, I ate. I was talking to Kristen Schull and I ate while she was watching. I would add more if Kristen wasn't looking at me. I housed four giant New York style slices of pizza. Just. I wish she. Look, I love Kristen, but I was like, give me a privacy curtain. I'm eating pizza.
[41:26]
Valerie
Yeah.
[41:26]
Pete Holmes
I'm like, carbo loading for this. And I ate. So. But I. So that night, I had already eaten a lot of wheat. A lot of wheat.
[41:33]
Valerie
A lot of sugar.
[41:34]
Pete Holmes
And some sugar. Yeah. But I don't know. I. I don't know if Rob is like, no added sugar in, like, pizza sauce, but he wouldn't eat it because of the wheat. Anyway, I was not on board yet. I was like, you look fantastic with sugar and wheat. That's pretty tricky. But then he started talking about it. And I'm not endorsing this, by the way, for anybody listening, but if you're like me, you're gonna listen anyway. And there's nothing I can do. But he was like, I can still eat potatoes, I can eat rice, I eat French fries like, it's going nuts. And I'm looking at a man who looks like the pinnacle of health, and he's telling me he eats French fries.
[42:04]
Valerie
Yeah.
[42:05]
Pete Holmes
And then he said, at this point, I'm gonna say I'm 70 in. This is the sentence that took me the other 22%.
[42:14]
Valerie
Right?
[42:14]
Pete Holmes
Yeah, 22%.
[42:15]
Valerie
He went, 77 or so. 23.
[42:19]
Pete Holmes
23 on a dick. He went, and if there's something bad in peanut butter, I'm gonna die tomorrow. It's a pretty good Rob Delaney, actually. And I love peanut butter more than anything.
[42:32]
Valerie
More than anything, any food I know.
[42:34]
Pete Holmes
I love peanut butter. So I. My brain goes. We had an emergency meeting. It wasn't even French fries. I haven't even. I've been doing this for a couple weeks now. I haven't eaten any French fries. Because I don't buy that conceit. I think that's. I think that might be a blind spot. But it was fine. But I was like, I can. My. The emergency meeting was, you can eat peanut butter and you just have to give up, like, ice cream. Like, when we go to ice cream, I just don't get an ice cream. I was like, deal?
[43:01]
Valerie
Yeah, deal.
[43:02]
Pete Holmes
Love it. Done. This is Dr. Oz reminding you to vote Maga.
[43:09]
Valerie
I do think, oh, my God, isn't he I think so. I think I remember hearing he was a really sweet.
[43:15]
Pete Holmes
He did. Crashing. He was. I know people. People are mad about Dr. Oz, but he was very nice on our show.
[43:22]
Valerie
Our daughter. We do need to like, not talk about this stuff now in front of our daughter. She's seven and she is. She's had like a huge software update and she is like, you know, she's just a different person. And she said something in the. The other day, like looking in the mirror and said, I'm getting fat or I look fat. And I was like, I can I
[43:50]
Pete Holmes
just jump in right here? You know, this. That's not coming from me. As much of the like, 80s I like to bring into. Here's the. The sliver of 80s I like to bring into our parenting. Nice try or get lost. Like, these types of things. These, like, playful, hard nose. I've never. You know this.
[44:10]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
I know.
[44:10]
Valerie
But I also think gets through. We're. We're. It's like it's not an equal. It's like the scales are already tipped in our society.
[44:21]
Pete Holmes
Yes.
[44:22]
Valerie
Towards that. So we have to work extra hard.
[44:25]
Pete Holmes
It's like being not. Just don't be racist. Be anti racist.
[44:28]
Valerie
Yes.
[44:29]
Pete Holmes
With these issues as well.
[44:31]
Valerie
Yes. And it's like she's seeing just through billboards and everything on tv and. And you know, the fact that like, Disney princesses are skinny and the villains are fat and like, you know, she's getting all these.
[44:45]
Pete Holmes
That ware is like just a little bit of a more realistic bodied princess.
[44:51]
Valerie
I mean, Moana is the closest you get. And it's not great, you know, because
[44:56]
Pete Holmes
she could lose a few.
[44:58]
Valerie
Oh, my God.
[44:59]
Pete Holmes
So you're saying it's not enough. I wouldn't have counted Moana, but I.
[45:03]
Valerie
I do think that I don't like
[45:05]
Pete Holmes
admitting that I've thought about Moana's body. So I'm gonna stop.
[45:10]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
Hey, it's Julie, Louis Dreyfus from wiser than me, etc. Just popping in with a little reality check. Food waste shouldn't exist. There is no reason that our leftovers should end up in a landfill. But that's the final destination for about a third of the food we grow. Our ancestors would be confused. They use their food scraps as compost or as animal feed or in weird soups. All the stuff we did before garbage was invented. But composting is hard work. Living with a bucket of rotten food on your counter is gross. Most food goes in the trash because it's easy. And these days, we'll take any easy we can get. But now there's something easier. Drop your scraps in a mill food recycler. It looks like a kitchen bin and an iPhone had a baby. It takes nearly anything, even meat and bones. It works automatically. You can keep filling it for weeks and it never smells. When you finally empty it, you've got these nutrient rich grounds. Use them in your garden, pour them in your green bin or have mill get them to a small farm so the food you don't eat can help grow the food you do. Just like it should be. It's why I own a mill, why I invest in mill and why I'm still obsessed with my mill. If you want to get obsessed too, go to mill.com wiser to get $75 off. That's mill.com. for $75 off. Ray Ban Meta glasses take the friction out of travel.
[46:48]
Valerie
Move through the world with your hands
[46:50]
Pete Holmes
free and your head up. Hey Meta, where's the nearest metro station?
[46:53]
Valerie
Closest metro to you is Union Square, about three blocks away.
[46:56]
Pete Holmes
Hey Meta, text mom, I'm getting on the train now.
[46:59]
Valerie
Sending message.
[47:00]
Pete Holmes
Juggle your itinerary.
[47:01]
Valerie
Take calls and listen to music with open ear audio. No digging for your phone, no stopping for a map. Just you and your glasses.
[47:09]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
Ray Ban Meta iconic style meets Meta AI Available at Walmart and other authorized retailers.
[47:16]
Valerie
So you're saying with Hilton honors I can use points for a three night stay anywhere?
[47:20]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
Anywhere.
[47:21]
Valerie
What about fancy places like the canopy in Paris? Yeah, Hilton Honors baby. Or relaxing sanctuaries like the Conrad in Tulum Hilton Honors baby. What about the five star Waldorf Astoria in the Maldives? Are you gonna do this for all 9,000 properties when you want points that
[47:39]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
can take you anywhere anytime it matters
[47:41]
Valerie
where you stay Hilton for the stay. But I do think that yeah so she it's just getting in there and then you know my reaction and I do ask you to join my initiative in this is like I was like, I like pulled my belly out and was like oh yeah, I love my soft belly. And she was like I, I love your soft belly too. And I said and I didn't even tell you this. I'm just now telling you we'll be
[48:11]
Pete Holmes
right back mid rolls. I'm just kidding.
[48:14]
Valerie
I said, you know, you know how women have babies like they are their bodies are able to have babies that's like really powerful. And men get have in the past and still get really threatened by how powerful women are. So they do all these things to make women feel not powerful. And one of the main ways they do that is to make us feel like our body should be small. So we should actually, like, actually be, like, small and quiet.
[48:49]
Pete Holmes
Literally take up less space.
[48:50]
Valerie
Take up less space. And I was like, isn't that rude? And she was like. She was like. There was a part where I was like, you know how women, like, I said, I held you in my body, like, I made you. And she was like, daddy made me, too. And I was like, all right, easy. Like, I.
[49:05]
Pete Holmes
She said that?
[49:06]
Valerie
Yeah. Like, she really nice. Like, I have to be. So I'm. And I'm not trying to be, like, anti male, but, like, she won't even go with me where I'm like, girls are a little bit better, right? Like, she won't. Because she loves you so much. She'll be like, no, Daddy. You know? And I was very clear. I was like, like, daddy's not one of these.
[49:23]
Pete Holmes
Daddy's not a male.
[49:25]
Valerie
Yeah, Daddy's barely. No, no, I've said. I said, like, dad.
[49:29]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
Daddy.
[49:30]
Pete Holmes
If it was a TV show, it would rack focus. And I'm trying to open a jar of pickles, but I can't.
[49:35]
Valerie
Yeah. And you're like, yeah, yeah, like Daddy.
[49:40]
Pete Holmes
And then I fall. So the scene ends.
[49:43]
Valerie
I said, you know, we know a lot of wonderful men, and Daddy's not one of the men that want women to be smaller. But. But, yeah, I just, like, went for it. I told her the whole thing because, like, I love that.
[49:56]
Pete Holmes
But anyway, I think, you know, I love that, right? You're not waiting for my approval.
[49:59]
Valerie
But where that came from was, I think, even us talking about, like, I'm not eating wheat and sugar because I want to look better and I want to. And I've never said that to her, but I. But I. I think the. I. I just. I'm talking about you and I talking in front of her. I'm not saying you're saying these things to her.
[50:20]
Pete Holmes
Do you think we've. Have we talked about this in front of her?
[50:22]
Valerie
I'm certain we have. We don't watch what we say in front of her very often. And we're a lot of the time talking about what we're eating and not eating. And it's like, you know how I know? Because our friend Ariella going back to Spam and smell like she's got. She has always been, like, really strict about it.
[50:41]
Pete Holmes
And she was like, just in front of the kids because she and I like to talk about it.
[50:44]
Valerie
And I know it's really smart. Like, I. I mean. And she catches.
[50:48]
Pete Holmes
She's right.
[50:49]
Valerie
She catches me saying, like, oh, it's a fast day, or, oh, it's. And I realize, like, how often I'm talking about stuff like that.
[50:55]
Pete Holmes
Yeah. That is a concern that Leela will think I had some sort of eating disorder. With full respect to people that have, like, serious.
[51:04]
Valerie
Disordered eating.
[51:05]
Pete Holmes
Disordered eating.
[51:05]
Valerie
Yeah.
[51:06]
Pete Holmes
But I am worried. I think about that.
[51:08]
Valerie
I mean, I know people have messaged me on this podcast saying that they don't. Like, it's very triggering to them how we talk about food. And let's just say, like, we don't think we have the most healthy relationship with food.
[51:21]
Pete Holmes
You look back and I'm just eating a bag of raw wheat. I guess that would be flour or Bulgar, meaning just Bulgar.
[51:29]
Valerie
We're not. We're not talking about. We're not experts on any of this.
[51:32]
Pete Holmes
No, no, no.
[51:32]
Valerie
There's a lot of stuff.
[51:33]
Pete Holmes
Much going on there. Yeah, so much going on.
[51:38]
Valerie
Yeah.
[51:38]
Pete Holmes
Yeah, for sure.
[51:39]
Valerie
I just want. I want. But I know that, like, my mom. So my mom's mom was really hypercritical of her and of her.
[51:49]
Pete Holmes
Oh, yeah.
[51:50]
Valerie
Of my mom. Yeah. Yeah. And like, you know, and so my mom had a lot of body image things. And then my mom did a great job correcting that and was, like, always telling me that I was beautiful and perfect and had, you know, a perfect body, but then was talking. Would constantly be talking bad about her body. And her and my dad were always trying to lose weight. Weight. And that is the part. The example matters more than what you're saying.
[52:19]
Pete Holmes
Yeah.
[52:19]
Valerie
So I've just become really aware of that also. Even just commenting on bodies, even if you're complimenting. It's like, I want Leela to learn. And I did say this to her too. Like, your body is your vessel through which you experience this life. Like, don't think about it much beyond that. Like, keep it healthy so that you can experience this life for as long as you. You can.
[52:42]
Pete Holmes
Well, you said this to me the other day. You were like. Because I. The joke about, like, I've been swimming every day. Why aren't I more ripped? And you're like, just love your body.
[52:50]
Valerie
Yeah, it's take. I posted it Instagram because I saw this person say, move your body. Try to move your body every day. Eat somewhat reasonably, and then let your body be whatever the hell it is. Right. Which is very, you know, you and I are both.
[53:06]
Pete Holmes
That doesn't. Somewhat reasonably doesn't work for. And this is, like, at play here. But my Addict thing. It's like, if I'm eating goldfish, I eat goldfish, and then I'm like, some sort of, like, dystopian Zelda boss that is in, like, a mountain of goldfish and you have to slay me, and then I turn into a heart.
[53:22]
Valerie
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[53:24]
Pete Holmes
It's hard for me to, like, just eat a little goldfish. It's similar to booze.
[53:28]
Valerie
And that would be something, too, I think both of us could stand to, like, talk about in therapy. I think that is a thing.
[53:36]
Pete Holmes
Oh, wow. I mean, I think feel a little attacked here. I'm just kidding.
[53:42]
Valerie
I'm including myself in that.
[53:43]
Pete Holmes
No, no, it comes up. Yeah, it comes up. I used to eat to comfort myself. For sure it was the blanket you pulled up to your chin, starting from the inside of your stomach.
[53:53]
Valerie
Yeah, totally.
[53:54]
Pete Holmes
But when Leila says things like that, too, and we don't talk about fat or those words or whatever, and she will say something like that. And I. I just want you to know I'm also saying, like, all bodies are beautiful and, like, yeah, daddy's soft and I love my body and all that sort. And that sort of stuff is exactly what I was looking for as a kid. It is funny that even in, like, a tiny little Montessori school in a mountain valley, like, down.
[54:21]
Valerie
Yeah.
[54:22]
Pete Holmes
She's still somehow coming home and being like.
[54:25]
Valerie
I know. It's. That's what I'm saying. It's like an uphill battle. We're, like, just gonna have to do our best to. But I think we. What I think is really. You know, we had a babysitter, a friend, Katie Fishel. She's. She's so wonderful. She's the one that said this to me. I'm pretty sure even when Lila was a baby, she was like, the way the two of you are, like, with our soft bodies and how we still, like, dance and we're naked all the time and we're, like, hunched over and have our belly rolls out and, like, we're, like, not self conscious about it. Like, that will be the biggest pro for Leela. Like, it's really sweet. Yeah. So, you know, it is. It is good that we both have soft bods.
[55:17]
Pete Holmes
And there is something. Look, you. I'm giving you a very small paragraph, like I've written in school, and I want you to grade it, mark it up. I'm not standing by it. But there's your parents, who are always doing, like, Weight Watchers. And then they would do south beach, and then they would do Atkins and they're like a lot of people going up and down and up and down. There is a newer. There's more data. Like, people know more stuff. And a lot of the basics don't really change. Hear me out. I went on. I didn't think you were gonna interrupt, but I just don't think I'm saying anything that interesting yet. But I was on flying home from Denver and I was talking to my seatmate, and he. It was so interesting. We had so many overlapping interests. One was male friendship. We had very similar parents. I'm not gonna talk about it because it's his business, but we had very similar parent stuff. And he was a little bit older than me, so he's talking about losing his. All this stuff. And then we started talking about food because I noticed he didn't eat the nuts and all this stuff, and he had his own food. And it was just like. It looked great. It was just like a mountain of green beans and vegetables and all this stuff. And. And, like, I think there was some chicken in it. I really took a look at this meal. But he was just one of these guys that's been, like, for decades. Very, very interested. And I think it was for health reasons. Like, you had to be extra careful. And I'm like, that's not changing a diet every. Like, what are the chances that. Just as well? I guess pretty good. But I thought it was interesting that just as I had been like, okay, I'm going to cool it on wheat and sugar. That doesn't mean. I did Bert Kreischer's podcast, like, two days after. I was like, I'm not going to eat, like, refined sugar desserts. And he was like, try one of these nerd clusters. And I ate it.
[57:06]
Valerie
Yeah.
[57:06]
Pete Holmes
So I'm not being, like, insane about it, but. Or whatever extreme about it. I don't know what I'm saying.
[57:14]
Valerie
No, I hear you. That it's slightly. That it is sort of different than.
[57:18]
Pete Holmes
What's the word? There's. What is that word? It's playing. There's things that are true and were true in the 80s and were true in the 70s, and they're still true. And, like, we don't. I'm looking for the something wisdom. It's not cardinal wisdom. It's. It's this thing. It's like, that's just. If you eat a lot of vegetables. Yeah, a lot. And people get their protein different ways, but, like. And protein, you should be okay. Yeah. And I'm trying to say, like, I don't aspire to be like your parents. And I don't want to be. I don't want Leela to see us chasing things. But what I'm trying to say is we're in this new era where you can. And I. Then I did listen to a podcast test where a guy was explaining all of the science behind this, and I was like, well, now I'm like, now I'm. I can't have an ice cream. Like, I really know too much.
[58:09]
Valerie
Yeah, well, no, I. I know there is a difference, because also, a lot of the diets that our parents were doing weren't very healthy, and it was just to lose weight. And we're. I think as long as we're taking the angle that we do take, which is like, I'm just trying to be healthy.
[58:29]
Pete Holmes
Perennial wisdom, you know?
[58:30]
Valerie
And then also, there is actually kind of something that I do about the, like, back and forth that I do want Leela to see where I'm like, yeah, like, sometimes I'm on a kick where I'm like, I'm really gonna try to get my, like, 140 grams of protein every day, which is impossible. I still have never really been able to do it, but. Wow.
[58:52]
Pete Holmes
You know, that's like half your body weight.
[58:54]
Valerie
Half my body weight? You think I weigh 280 pounds?
[58:58]
Pete Holmes
I didn't do the math, baby. I just was. A lot of times those formulas come from, like, half your body weight.
[59:04]
Valerie
It's like a gr. No, it's like a. It's a one for one.
[59:08]
Pete Holmes
Oh, you weigh 140.
[59:09]
Valerie
Okay. I weigh probably a little more than that. I don't.
[59:14]
Pete Holmes
I haven't weighed myself 100 pounds more than you.
[59:16]
Valerie
I know.
[59:17]
Pete Holmes
A hundred.
[59:18]
Valerie
You're taller than.
[59:19]
Pete Holmes
I'm another person.
[59:21]
Valerie
Yeah. The difference between you and me is, like, in height is greater than the difference between me and Leela now, by the way.
[59:33]
Pete Holmes
Oh, wow.
[59:34]
Valerie
Like, she.
[59:34]
Pete Holmes
She's catching up.
[59:35]
Valerie
She's catching up. But anyway, so I just. I do think there is something healthy to, like, sometimes I'm doing that, and then sometimes I am a little bit like, yeah, I'm getting my little sour gummy Swedish fish candies and then little treats.
[59:49]
Pete Holmes
I wouldn't change any of that about you.
[59:51]
Valerie
And, you know, we do. We do sort of try to, like, know bad foods sometimes. Foods.
[59:57]
Pete Holmes
She's saying there are no bad foods foods, not no bad foods.
[60:00]
Valerie
Yes, that's right. It's very different. Good.
[60:02]
Pete Holmes
Yeah, yeah. A lot of people do. No bad foods.
[60:05]
Valerie
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, like. Yeah. So I don't know, it's all. It's one of it falls under the. The umbrella of trailblazing parenting, which is so hard where you're like, how do you do a thing that isn't what's been example to you? And then also just that you're like, yeah, ideally we would have had everything all. All healed. And I remember saying to my therapist when I was like, embarking on the beginnings of, like, my trauma therapy, and I was also a new mom, and I was like, I just wish I had, like, healed all of this stuff before I had a kid. And she's like, let's really, like, sit with what that actually means. Like, you wish that you were perfect before you had a kid. You know, it's like, that's not going to happen. You're not going to. Would ever be done healing this stuff, first of all. And also it's like, yeah, I just. I'm like, oh, man. I have. I have these issues that I don't want to hand down to my kid. And you're like, well, what's the alternative? You just. You don't have any issues and then you have a kid. Like, that's not gonna happen.
[61:15]
Pete Holmes
So, yeah.
[61:16]
Valerie
So we're just doing the best we can and it's a mess. And it's okay.
[61:19]
Pete Holmes
I like you every week. I'm with you every day. Okay. So I. For fun.
[61:24]
Valerie
But I like you about once.
[61:25]
Pete Holmes
And I know I. I am really tearing into. We need to rethink how we've been thinking about AI and again, Julian Watley is a great YouTube channel. I'm not being paid to say that. Also, I did ask Chat GPT just to end us on a lighter thing, because we are closing here to break down this, the characters in Seinfeld into their Disney characters and also which soda they are.
[61:49]
Valerie
Oh, love it. Okay, great.
[61:50]
Pete Holmes
This is very awesome.
[61:51]
Valerie
We haven't done this in a long time.
[61:53]
Pete Holmes
Well, Jerry is Mickey.
[61:55]
Valerie
Yeah.
[61:55]
Pete Holmes
And I just want to say because I have been dragging LLMs a lot, it's amazing that it's like, well, obviously Jerry is Mickey. Like, that is amazing. Yeah, it's not. It's not what it appears to be, but it is amazing.
[62:09]
Valerie
I know. And I also, you know, I get it. It's like, it's not. It's not great to use, but I do fully intend to ask ChatGPT what this rash is that I have on my back.
[62:20]
Pete Holmes
Yeah, we're going to take a picture of your shingles. George Costanza is Donald duck and he's Dr. Pepper.
[62:27]
Valerie
Dr. Pepper. No, I disagree.
[62:30]
Pete Holmes
I think he. I can see it, but I don't love it. What is George's Sprite?
[62:36]
Valerie
George's. Okay, wait, what's Jerry. Coca Cola. Yeah, George's.
[62:43]
Pete Holmes
He might be Diet Coke. There's something very queen. Very George. He's diet.
[62:48]
Valerie
He's Diet Coke. You're right.
[62:49]
Pete Holmes
Oh, my God. It made Elaine Diet Coke.
[62:52]
Valerie
She is diet.
[62:53]
Pete Holmes
She's Diet Coke.
[62:54]
Valerie
Okay, he might be.
[62:56]
Pete Holmes
He might be Diet Dr. Pepper.
[62:58]
Valerie
I was gonna say Diet Pepsi.
[63:00]
Pete Holmes
I don't think once you're in the Coke family. I want to stay in the Coke family. I mean, they made Newman RC Cola. So, I mean, it's jumping all over.
[63:09]
Valerie
Okay, maybe Newman is. No, George is our C. Cola.
[63:13]
Pete Holmes
George is oursicola. I. We have different perceptions of RC Cola. The word crown really makes me go like, that's the king's drink.
[63:20]
Valerie
I know. And I love RC Cola. I love it maybe the most. But I don't think of it as a fancy.
[63:27]
Pete Holmes
I think I think of it as like, oh, my God, there's RC Cola.
[63:30]
Valerie
I think of it as, like, a generic brand cola.
[63:33]
Pete Holmes
But I.
[63:34]
Valerie
Sorry, no.
[63:35]
Pete Holmes
Whenever you get, like, a supermarket brand cola, it was a little bit better than you thought it would be.
[63:39]
Valerie
Root beer. George's root beer.
[63:42]
Pete Holmes
Oh, my God. Of course he is.
[63:43]
Valerie
He's root Beer. I can't even believe it took us that long.
[63:45]
Pete Holmes
Elaine is Daisy. They think Diet Coke. I mean, Kramer is goofy, obviously. And he's Mountain Dew.
[63:51]
Valerie
Yeah.
[63:52]
Pete Holmes
I think Kramer's drink might be Mr. Pib. It might be.
[63:56]
Valerie
Yeah.
[63:56]
Pete Holmes
Mr. Mountain Dew is a little.
[63:58]
Valerie
It's Mr. Pip. You're.
[63:59]
Pete Holmes
I was right. Right.
[64:00]
Valerie
You're 100.
[64:00]
Pete Holmes
He's Mr. Pib.
[64:01]
Valerie
He's Mr. Pip.
[64:02]
Pete Holmes
This is why, you see, humans need to work with these tools.
[64:05]
Valerie
Yeah. 100
[64:09]
Pete Holmes
weirdly specific. This is breaking down.
[64:11]
Valerie
Why does it say. Yeah. What's the defense for Elaine being Daisy Duck? I think it's just that she's a girl.
[64:17]
Pete Holmes
Oh, Diet Coke. Here's the reasoning for her being Diet Coke. Sharp, efficient, no nonsense. And secretly more popular than some of the originals. Oh, I like that.
[64:26]
Valerie
I like that. I think she is Diet Coke. 100%. But I want to.
[64:30]
Pete Holmes
Oh. For supporting characters, Frank Costanza is Jolt Cola. I support that. Estelle Costanza is a shaken up can of Sprite. Okay, stop.
[64:38]
Valerie
A shaken up.
[64:39]
Pete Holmes
Yeah, stop. Stop Interneting so hard.
[64:42]
Valerie
That was.
[64:42]
Pete Holmes
Stop Interneting so hard. I want to know its source. Like, where did it get a shaken up can of Sprite?
[64:48]
Valerie
Yeah.
[64:49]
Pete Holmes
Jay, Peterman. Is Mexican Coke, expensive, important, and comes with a story. Uncle Leo's Orange Crush. That's correct.
[64:57]
Valerie
Yeah.
[64:58]
Pete Holmes
David Putty is. Barks. Root beer.
[65:00]
Valerie
Oh, my gosh.
[65:01]
Pete Holmes
Specifically Barks. Root beer.
[65:02]
Valerie
Barks. Root beer.
[65:03]
Pete Holmes
He's bark. Because it barks.
[65:05]
Valerie
Yeah.
[65:05]
Pete Holmes
Elaine. Elaine. I'm a. Barks.
[65:08]
Valerie
That's really good. That's really good. Remember the episode where he likes listening to Christian rock?
[65:14]
Pete Holmes
It comforts me. Why does he like it?
[65:18]
Valerie
I don't know. Yeah, I can't remember.
[65:19]
Pete Holmes
Eight beater. Eight beater.
[65:23]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
Okay.
[65:24]
Pete Holmes
The one I feel strongest about is George castanza. Donald Duck. Dr. Pepper.
[65:28]
Valerie
That's what it says. You feel. I'm sorry. You feel strongest.
[65:32]
Pete Holmes
It's an. This is. This is what I'm saying. Look, with respect to this miracle technology, it is a predictive text engine, and it's looking at articles about these types of things, and it's scouring, and that's how people talk. I feel strongly about this. It is amazing. But one. I know. We just used it. Just remember, it's just mimicking and mirroring and serving you all.
[65:57]
Valerie
It's the best example that I've thought of.
[65:59]
Pete Holmes
Fast, confident, and sometimes. Right, right.
[66:01]
Valerie
That. You know, we. We used to have this toy, actually. Kate Micucci gave it to us. It's very sweet because it. It.
[66:07]
Pete Holmes
She.
[66:08]
Valerie
The white tiger recorded. Yeah, she recorded her voice singing songs, and it.
[66:12]
Pete Holmes
Well, I think she was the toy.
[66:14]
Valerie
That's what I'm saying.
[66:15]
Pete Holmes
Oh, it sounded like. You thought she gave us, like, a build. A bear.
[66:18]
Valerie
She did. No, she did the, like. Yeah, the voiceover for this, and it, like, moved and it sang and it had eyes and a face. And that was one of the first. First things our baby interacted with. And she absolutely thought it was as alive as we were.
[66:33]
Pete Holmes
Yeah.
[66:33]
Valerie
Because it had the same eyes, it had movement, it had the voice. So, like, that's what we're doing. We just have no reference for if something says to us the one I feel strongly about, we're like, this thing's alive.
[66:47]
Pete Holmes
Fast, confident, and sometimes. Right. But you have to go, wait, this is a dream. Or, wait, this is not. This is a stuffed animal with a voice box. Yeah, but the problem is, you're brilliant. AI or LLMs are a teddy bear with a voice box that a baby thinks is real.
[67:07]
Valerie
Yes.
[67:07]
Pete Holmes
And that. And we're the baby.
[67:08]
Valerie
Yeah, we're the baby.
[67:09]
Pete Holmes
I. Oh, I forgot two things. One, I showed pictures. I always say to Leela, I go, ooh. Like, that's my impression of girls. I'm like, you're a girl. Ooh. It's just a joke. I don't do it a lot. But then I caught myself, and I was like, well, that's not quite right. I looked up a picture of Linda Hamilton in a Terminator 2. I went, this is also a girl.
[67:25]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
Yes.
[67:26]
Pete Holmes
You were there.
[67:26]
Valerie
Yes.
[67:27]
Pete Holmes
And she loved it.
[67:28]
Valerie
I'm so proud.
[67:28]
Pete Holmes
And I loved it. And I was like, see? Women are strong. And this one has a rifle.
[67:32]
Valerie
Leela was watching, like, some goddamn. We have to, like. We have to get bread. Barbershop off of her.
[67:38]
Pete Holmes
I told her to stop watching it.
[67:39]
Valerie
It's.
[67:40]
Pete Holmes
It's one of the worst things I've ever seen. She says, can I watch? I go, yes, but not bread. Barbershop.
[67:45]
Valerie
Yeah, same I do. She's. I've been saying that for. For a long time.
[67:49]
Pete Holmes
I can take it out of her cheek.
[67:50]
Valerie
She was watching one of the episodes, and it was. It, like, was milk. The Milk character was, like, dressing like a girl and pretending to be a girl. And. And I was like, what is this? And I. And then we had a whole conversation where I was like, boys and girls can dress however they want. You know, like, doing the whole thing. And then also I was like, it's acting like a girl. Like, it's, like, weak. And I was like, girls are really strong. Like, you're one of the strongest people I know when you're a girl, you know, like, try. And then. And then I heard you say the Linda Hamilton thing, and I had just said that.
[68:26]
Pete Holmes
Oh, wow. Nice.
[68:26]
Valerie
So it was like a nice one, two punch.
[68:28]
Pete Holmes
Nice. Nice. I forget what the other thing was. It was another nice little moment here at the end. What were you talking about?
[68:38]
Valerie
Bread Barbershop.
[68:40]
Pete Holmes
I took it out of her queue. Anyway, it's fine. It's fine. It's fine.
[68:44]
Valerie
It's fine. It's fine. We're parenting. It's okay. It's fine. It's exhausting.
[68:47]
Julie Louis-Dreyfus
It's.
[68:48]
Valerie
So we're talking tired. I'm so tired.
[68:49]
Pete Holmes
I'm glad everybody was here. A nice little summer series. We made it weird.
[68:54]
Valerie
Yeah, I'm so. I. I'm not feeling it today because I think I had. Because I had a glass of wine last night. I'm feeling very exhausted. But I've been really. You've been seeing me. Loving kicking off summer.
[69:06]
Pete Holmes
Oh, yeah.
[69:07]
Valerie
So excited about.
[69:08]
Pete Holmes
You're having a summer.
[69:09]
Valerie
So we're gonna have a summer. This is just the beginning, you guys. We're gonna have summer fun.
[69:13]
Pete Holmes
That's right.
[69:13]
Valerie
And you're gonna be here for it it every week and until then, keep it crispy.
[69:28]
Pete Holmes
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[69:50]
Valerie
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[70:00]
Pete Holmes
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