STRANDED ON THE STREET! -You Should Know Podcast-

Summary

You Should Know Podcast – Episode 171 Summary: "Stranded on the Street!"

Release Date: June 30, 2025
Host: Peyton Hardin
Co-Host: Cameron Kennedy
Produced by: Wood Elf Media

---

1. Upcoming Tour and Toronto Excitement

Peyton kicks off the episode by announcing their upcoming tour expansion to Toronto, Canada. He enthusiastically urges listeners to secure their tickets promptly, highlighting the overwhelmingly positive reviews they've received so far.

"We are headed to Toronto, Canada. Make sure you get your tickets right now before it's too late." [00:58]

The hosts express their gratitude for the successful run on the West Coast, including cities like Los Angeles, Phoenix, and Vegas, and tease a documentary available on their Patreon platform.

2. Recap of the Los Angeles Show

The bulk of the episode centers around Peyton and Cam's experiences performing in Los Angeles. They share anecdotes from their recent show, emphasizing both the highs and the mishaps.

a. Show Highlights and Audience Interaction

Cam reminisces about the lively LA crowd, mentioning a memorable interaction with a baby in the audience.

"That baby did have headphones on." [04:21]

Despite technical issues, such as obstructed seats and a malfunctioning screen setup, both hosts commend the overall energy of the Los Angeles audience.

b. The Lighter Incident: An Embarrassing Attempt to Light a Joint

A humorous yet cringe-worthy story unfolds as Cam attempts to light a joint using an unusually small lighter, leading to a series of failed attempts and bystander attention.

"We have to talk to the venue. That's another ticket charge." [04:40]

The situation escalates when angry bystanders mistake their actions for illicit drug use, prompting laughter and frustration from both hosts.

"They think we're smoking crack cocaine. It's just that it's this one pre-roll." [10:07]
"They think we're smoking crack cocaine." [25:05]

This incident not only highlights their camaraderie but also serves as a cautionary tale about unforeseen challenges during live performances.

3. The Contagious Yawn Debate

Transitioning from tour stories, Peyton and Cam delve into a lighthearted yet animated discussion about the science of yawning. They debate whether yawns are solely contagious through visual stimuli or if verbal triggers can also induce them.

"If somebody's talking about a yawn, it can trigger a yawn." [12:25]

Their banter becomes increasingly playful, with Peyton asserting personal experiences that challenge Cam's claims about yawning triggers.

"I have stuffed a sock before." [58:36]
"I almost did a magician, little David Blaine." [14:03]

The segment showcases their dynamic chemistry and ability to turn a simple topic into an engaging conversation.

4. Family Tales: Malachi's Unruly Behavior

The hosts share heartfelt yet humorous stories about Peyton's son, Malachi, depicting him as a spirited and energetic child who keeps his uncle on his toes.

"He grabbed my beard yesterday." [70:17]
"He's a fighter. Like, he fights." [70:10]

Cam contributes by describing Malachi's birthday party, where a costumed Spider-Man character's overly enthusiastic antics provide both amusement and mild chaos.

"He goes, this is Venom. He goes around, he's just all the kids." [65:15]

These narratives not only add a personal touch to the episode but also resonate with listeners who relish parenting stories.

5. Pop Culture Segment: OKC's NBA Championship Critique

In their favorite segment, Peyton and Cam express their controversial take on the Oklahoma City Thunder's recent NBA championship win. They criticize the city's infrastructure and the perceived lack of celebration from the team and its fans.

"Oklahoma City does not deserve a Larry O' Brien." [80:22]

Their passionate discussion touches on various aspects, from the city's architecture to the players' post-victory behaviors, ultimately questioning the legitimacy and enthusiasm surrounding the championship.

"Their NBA championship should be revoked." [83:20]
"Never gonna watch one highlight from that NBA Finals ever." [88:53]

This segment underscores their unabashed honesty and willingness to voice unpopular opinions, fostering lively debates among their audience.

6. The Great Rug Debate: Furniture or Decor?

Peyton and Cam engage in a spirited argument over whether rugs qualify as furniture or merely serve as decorative accents. Their back-and-forth highlights differing perspectives on household items' functionalities and classifications.

Peyton: "A floor mat... is like eating cereal with a fork. It's wrong and weird." [75:07]
Cam: "Rug is decor, okay?" [54:03]

The debate escalates with academic-style definitions and humorous jabs, showcasing their ability to turn mundane topics into entertaining dialogues.

7. Real-Time Interaction: Live Call with Zach Urbanis

Towards the end of the episode, Peyton and Cam conduct an impromptu live call with Zach Urbanis, Alex Caruso's trainer. They address recent comments Zach made that seemingly disrespected LeBron James, leading to a playful yet tense exchange.

Peyton: "What do you mean Taj Urbanis?" [85:38]
Cam: "We're gonna sever that tie." [87:58]

The interaction is filled with humor and camaraderie, reinforcing their approachable and interactive rapport with their listeners.

8. Upcoming Shows and Community Engagement

Concluding the episode, Peyton and Cam reiterate their excitement for upcoming tour dates in cities like Toronto, Chicago, Detroit, and New York. They also encourage listeners to join their Koala Club on Patreon for exclusive content and community benefits.

"The next most important link is the amazing, beautiful community, the Koala Club over on Patreon.com." [91:11]

Their closing remarks emphasize the importance of community support and engagement, inviting listeners to be part of their growing fanbase.

---

Notable Quotes:

• "We are professional grade." – Peyton [00:48]
• "It's like a fifth of my thumb." – Cam [19:31]
• "Our poor little squishy brains." – Cam [16:29]
• "That's a oliver, stop yawning." – Peyton [15:00]
• "It needs to be studied how bad that was." – Cam [81:44]

---

Conclusion

Episode 171 of the "You Should Know Podcast" offers a blend of tour anecdotes, personal stories, humorous debates, and pop culture critiques. Peyton Hardin and Cameron Kennedy's dynamic interplay ensures an engaging listen, whether you're a long-time follower or new to their friendship-driven banter. From navigating embarrassing moments on tour to dissecting the functionalities of household items, this episode encapsulates the essence of their candid and entertaining conversations. Be sure to catch their upcoming Toronto show and join the Koala Club for more exclusive content.

Transcript

[Peyton]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever find yourself playing the budgeting game? Well, with the name your price tool from Progressive you can find options that fit your budget and potentially lower your bills. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates Price and coverage match limited by state law not available in all states. Put us in a box.

[Cam]

Go ahead.

[Peyton]

That just gives us something to break out of because the Next Generation Generation 2025 GMC Terrain Elevation is raising the.

[Cam]

Standard of what comes standard.

[Peyton]

As far as expectations go, why meet.

[Cam]

Them when you can shatter them? What we choose to challenge, we challenge completely.

[Peyton]

We are professional grade.

[Cam]

Visit gmc.com to learn more.

[Peyton]

The you SHOULD Know Podcast hey everybody. Welcome back to you should Know podcast episode 171. Round of applause please everybody. Welcome back to the you know podcast. If you are new here or if you haven't already, look below you see the subscribe button. Press you're wrong. If you leave even more below that you see the comment section fulfilled with your name. Guess what? Even more wrong. Go and fill that out. Get your good karma. I want to say we want to say thank you so much to the west Coast, Los Angeles, Phoenix, Vegas for the fantastic run over there. Round of applause. We will get into that soon. We will get into that. But coming up we are going outside the country. We are headed to Toronto. We are headed to Toronto, Canada. Make sure you get your tickets right now before it's too late. Do not miss out on a once in a lifetime opportunity. We have read the reviews of the show, all the good ones. We haven't seen any bad ones. There's not been a single bad one and I'm willing to stamp that not a single bad one. So get your tickets now first link in the description or go to you should know studios.com if you want to see the end of the tour. If you want to see the documentary that we are making, it will be on the Patreon on the Quality Club. And if you want content almost every single day outside of this full length here on YouTube and on Spotify, go over to the koala club. That's patreon.com you should know podcast. We love you so much. Thank you so much for being here. Be sure to share this podcast with your friends. Hit the subscribe button. We'll see you in Toronto coming up soon. Get your tickets below on to the rest of the episode. You should know podcast. We got co host cam back in the studio. Co host Cam Uncle P. How I don't know. Do it again. Uncle P. Co host Cam.

[Cam]

Now finish when I say P. Uncle P.

[Peyton]

I thought that's what you wanted. No, I wanted you to because you make me do that.

[Cam]

No, no, don't you put that on my jacket.

[Peyton]

No, he does make me do that.

[Cam]

Michael's more secret. I wanted you to say N o. Okay. That sounded weird too, but nk n.

[Peyton]

We echo scam back in the studio.

[Cam]

About 12 seconds in. Make sure you hit up Patreon on Friday.

[Peyton]

Yeah. See what I said? Okay, look, we just came back from. From the west coast run of the tour. Why? Why air quotes? We didn't actually do that yet.

[Cam]

Oh, okay. I was like, that is the West Coast.

[Peyton]

I know, but I like to keep them, like, actually, like, where we're at in the storyline.

[Cam]

An honest age.

[Peyton]

We just finished the LA show.

[Cam]

My boys can't hang John Wilks in that booth. I shoot.

[Peyton]

Close. Okay, but we just left the LA show, Right. We haven't done Phoenix and we haven't done Vegas yet. Right?

[Cam]

Correct. Honest.

[Peyton]

Los Angeles is beautiful. It is Great city. Great city. It was a great show. Round of applause for Los Angeles. Thank you so much for coming out.

[Cam]

That baby had headphones on.

[Peyton]

That baby did have head. Presley, right?

[Cam]

Presley. Crowd was crowding.

[Peyton]

Yeah. So there was a baby in like the fourth row and I saw her and I was like, hey, hey, little munchkin. Yeah.

[Cam]

Hey.

[Peyton]

How'd you get in here? And you didn't pay for a ticket? You're sitting in your mom's lap. So we're going to have to make it.

[Cam]

We have to talk to the venue. That's another ticket charge.

[Peyton]

Yeah, that. We need the money, especially from this venue. We got paid $12 to be here.

[Cam]

I go. If we count it all up, we might have left in the red.

[Peyton]

La. La.

[Cam]

Say with me. You're welcome. We did that out of the.

[Peyton]

Oh, no. We paid out of pocket to perform in Los Angeles. It was. It was unbelievable. But it was worth it. It was a very great show. It wasn't. No, it wasn't. No. I like LA.

[Cam]

I love LA.

[Peyton]

LA was a great show.

[Cam]

LA is always fun to go to. It honestly is. Both years. It's been fun to perform at too. Like, there's not other cities. It's like, oh, the show is great, but it's like, we didn't do anything.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

No, we're in Los Angeles. Yeah.

[Peyton]

You know, the theater is a nice theater. I want to say a third of the crowd got Over a third of the crowd got absolutely like, like, rigged out of their money. No, and it's not our fault.

[Cam]

It was.

[Peyton]

It was literally so, like, it was bad. So there is the Fondant Theater. There's upstairs, like, the balcony. It's public. Where we went. Yeah. Upstairs balcony seating. Then there's the down low seating. There's the middle.

[Cam]

And then there's vast amount of seats.

[Peyton]

So many at the bottom. And then there's left and the right.

[Cam]

Oh.

[Peyton]

Yeah, you can take a whiff. That's some of that burp gas smoking.

[Cam]

On that burp pack. Hey, let me get a hit of that acid reflux.

[Peyton]

So. So, right, the people in the middle, everything was great, but the people to the left and the right, oh, man. I was like, they are very. To the left and to the right, and there's a bunch of pillars and speakers. There's a screen behind us. And that's, like, a very pivotal part of our show.

[Cam]

Very pivotal.

[Peyton]

I remember at the beginning of the show, I. You know, I was doing a crowd check, as I do, making sure everybody.

[Cam]

You should tell them what we were actually doing. What were we doing? Why were we down there in the seats?

[Peyton]

Oh. Oh, my God. I forgot I even did that the second time.

[Cam]

Lee, you gotta tell.

[Peyton]

So what we do before the venues, right? Especially this Los Angeles one. They had us there so early before the show, so I was just killing time. I felt like I was a prisoner. And so I was going around the theater, just finding stuff to do in the balcony, like in the metal and the.

[Cam]

In the mezzanine.

[Peyton]

But it's the course corset. What's it called?

[Cam]

No, courtroom.

[Peyton]

The word. Like, you go. Hot dogs and concession. No, the course courtyard. The core. It starts. No. Whatever. Yeah, they'll put in the comments. It's gonna really bother me.

[Cam]

Course.

[Peyton]

Whatever. The concourse.

[Cam]

Yes. There we go.

[Peyton]

Clap for me.

[Cam]

That's a win.

[Peyton]

Concourse.

[Cam]

That's a win. Clap for him, you idiot.

[Peyton]

Concourse. So I was in the concourse of the mezzanine. I was in the concourse of the mezzanine, right? And I saw this, like, slavery photo booth. Like, it was built by my ancestors for y' all.

[Cam]

No, I'm not. It was.

[Peyton]

It was literally made out of wood.

[Cam]

It was so old, right?

[Peyton]

And so you go in there. $6 for three photos.

[Cam]

Yeah, 650. Six.

[Peyton]

Fifty. Yeah.

[Cam]

Quarters.

[Peyton]

So I get in there and I'm like, I want to do it. I have nothing else to do. I take two pictures. Cameroon's the third one. He threw the white balance off of there. It was like. It was Like Casper the ghost came.

[Cam]

Okay, you called me in. First off, the booth was. It was 100% made for one person.

[Peyton]

Well, two normal sized persons, not a person. And cam.

[Cam]

That's hurtful. That's hurtful. I literally couldn't fit my fat in the seat.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

My face is this close to the camera. And it was built in the 1910, so it was like 3, 2, 1. Like a. Like a popping flash. I was like, ah, the picture came out. It's all.

[Peyton]

And so they gave us two copies. Right. I wanted to keep one. I hopefully I still have it. I don't know.

[Cam]

For memories and pleasure.

[Peyton]

The second one, we came up with the idea, let's go put this in the seat of somebody, right? And it'll be this big surprise, Right. And we'll call them out at the end of the show. Hey, who got the Easter egg? Come up on stage. We'll sign it. Completely forgot about it. Completely forgot about it. I mean.

[Cam]

I mean, I. I would have been. I would have put money on the fact that never happened. That's how bad we forgot about it.

[Peyton]

Yes.

[Cam]

I didn't take a picture.

[Peyton]

So we went down there to find the seat. And as we're finding the seat, this will be in the documentary as well. Yes. On the right and the left side. We notice these seats are very obstructed views. Yeah.

[Cam]

So we're sitting there and we look at it like. And we're about to leave the bottom floor of seats. And I go, fellas, I gotta. I gotta try this real quick. And I go over and I go. Talk about getting over. I sit in this seat that is a paid ticket.

[Peyton]

Yes. And one of the highest paid tickets.

[Cam]

Literally, like, no judges. You see one eighth of the. Of the screen that is. Could be played at a Cinemark.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

The screen's massive.

[Peyton]

One of the biggest screens we've ever had.

[Cam]

It's so nice, so bright, so crystal clear. And you see a literal sliver of it. And I was like. Like, it doesn't make us feel good.

[Peyton]

There would be parts of the shows where I would like, I would laugh or like, I would look to the crowd because something funny is on the screen happening the left and right side like this. Yeah.

[Cam]

Now I'm gonna go on a limb. And I'm like, if I'm being too much.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

It kind of changes the vibe. It changes the vibe. When you got a third of your entire audience. You can't see the punchline.

[Peyton]

It didn't stop the black dude in the left.

[Cam]

Yeah.

[Peyton]

He was Having the greatest time of his life. Couldn't see.

[Cam]

He said toothpaste. Social Security.

[Peyton]

Yeah, dude. He was ad libbing. Like, he was just saying whatever he felt like.

[Cam]

That was strange, fella. He's a good guy.

[Peyton]

It was. It was a super fun time. Thank you, Los Angeles. We're probably not gonna do a show there again. We're gonna come to California. We want to show, like, San Fran some love. San Diego, Louisiana. Y' all got a lot going on, man. You know, y' all aren't really paying too well. Actually. Not at all. But I love the LA crowd. I love the LA fans. It was so, so much fun.

[Cam]

Oh, my God. We performed in Kino Dur Toten. By the way, that theater literally was keto dur totten.

[Peyton]

I don't know. What is that?

[Cam]

The OG Zombies met.

[Peyton]

Oh, okay.

[Cam]

It legit was ke. Like, I literally looked at car up and I said, we got to get ready for dogs. I said, we're going to have a max ammo. It was unreal, bro.

[Peyton]

One of the things I didn't take into account either is the time change, which is making me nervous. For our overseas shows, we performed at 9pm Los Angeles time.

[Cam]

First off, that's crazy in itself, which.

[Peyton]

Is no reason to.

[Cam]

That's stupid.

[Peyton]

No reason to. That means we started the show at 11pm, our home time. We didn't get off the stage until 1am our time. I was. I was literally at a part of this show. I was like this.

[Cam]

Yeah.

[Peyton]

Yeah. Dude. Wait, how does that work?

[Cam]

What?

[Peyton]

Yawns?

[Cam]

They're contagious.

[Peyton]

Yeah, but how?

[Cam]

It's our brains. It's your prenatal cortex.

[Peyton]

Well, I wouldn't think it was my penis with you.

[Cam]

I don't know. I wouldn't put it past you.

[Peyton]

Wait, how?

[Cam]

That guy senses a lot of things.

[Peyton]

It's like he's like, oh, who's.

[Cam]

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Like, oh, no, no, he's driving. No, it's.

[Peyton]

Yeah. Tell me the science of yawns. I don't understand them now. I didn't.

[Cam]

I didn't conduct my own search and research project at Berkeley, but apparently my brain sees your brain get a big. A big reaction, you know, influx of oxygen. Because that's what a yawn is. You go, you're taking a lot of oxygen because you're tired, whatever. So my brain sees that now. My brain wants that. Apparently, that's all it is. Like, I noticed that you just got a hit of oxygen, and it's kind of like an addict, right?

[Peyton]

I Feel like you're fighting a yawn right now?

[Cam]

No, I probably am.

[Peyton]

I hear it in your throat.

[Cam]

If you take a pipe out in front of an attic.

[Peyton]

Yes.

[Cam]

They see pipe hit. They want to hit pipe.

[Peyton]

So you're associating me wanting oxygen with black tar.

[Cam]

100%. Little bit of straight to it.

[Peyton]

So, yeah, Y. No, but genuinely, I don't think that science is true.

[Cam]

No, it is.

[Peyton]

Because listen to me. I've watched runners run when they're done. My breathing pattern has never changed. I've just been like. After I see a runner, I'm not like this. I don't see a runner out of oxygen. And then all of a sudden I'm.

[Cam]

Like, okay, there's probably a second layer of it, you doof.

[Peyton]

What would it be? Second layer?

[Cam]

Your body is smart enough. If my brain can see through my eyes and have its own conversation and make me do something first off, that's kind of scary. Yeah, because our iron control. Yeah, but my brain sees you yawn. We're both doing the same thing. If my brain sees a guy or a girl, crazy, exhausted, it's not the same.

[Peyton]

Okay, but sometimes you don't even need to see a yawn to yawn. If you talk about a yawn, you'll yawn. Watch this. You're going to yawn.

[Cam]

I almost did a magician, little David Blaine.

[Peyton]

But I'm saying, like, you don't even need to see a yawn.

[Cam]

Have you thrown up while you yawned? Yeah, I did. I did like an in my mouth throw up last night in the middle of a yawn at 3 o' clock in the morning and it almost went on my son.

[Peyton]

Wouldn't that be a little bit of retribution, though? Is that even wrong to do throw up on your son?

[Cam]

That kind that. Now that you say it, I'm rocking, son. Like, yeah, yeah, that would be. That's payback.

[Peyton]

Yeah. Your son is violent too, but. Well, I guess. Well, I was just wondering about the yawn thing, but I don't know. You have nothing else to share? You thought you came in so confident.

[Cam]

I told you what it is. Yawns are. It's a yawn.

[Peyton]

I understand that, but I said. You said it's when you see it. I said you can yawn without seeing it.

[Cam]

That's just because you're tired.

[Peyton]

No, I'm talking about. If somebody's talking about a yawn, it can trigger a yawn.

[Cam]

Oh, no Shot. I've never been triggered by words of yawn.

[Peyton]

Dude, if you think about somebody yawning you'll yawn. No.

[Cam]

Oh, my God. What kind of. What kind of stupid 1920s magic is that? He's like, watch, I can do it all on my own. Stupid as hell. Hell, no.

[Peyton]

I think so.

[Cam]

If you're tired or if you see someone else yawn. Yeah, I'm not going yawn. This is a hypnosis. It's such a bad joke. It's such a bad bit, but it's good.

[Peyton]

It's not a bit. You're making me look at him. He's.

[Cam]

Well, he's a nightcrawler. He doesn't even sleep. Dude, you're not Johnny.

[Peyton]

Yeah, yeah. You're gonna be on. You're fighting it.

[Cam]

Your tongue is scarred. There's a huge split down the middle of your.

[Peyton]

Yeah, I got lizard tongue. It's a real thing.

[Cam]

What? Stop yawning. You're about to. I'm about to. I'm about to yawn.

[Peyton]

Oh, yeah, get it.

[Cam]

I can feel it talking.

[Peyton]

Yeah, it is watching. It's yawning. Is everybody thinking about yawning like this? He goes, okay, but why aren't sneezes contagious? Oh, my God.

[Cam]

Okay, let's just do it. Let's just do it. Yeah, let's just do it.

[Peyton]

Let's do it.

[Cam]

Your hand on the Bible right now. Do you fake yawn sometimes?

[Peyton]

Oh, I have definitely fake yawn sometimes.

[Cam]

Yes, it does.

[Peyton]

Wait, you know my. You know I know you're fake yawn every day. Have you seen my fake yawn? I don't ever do it in front of you.

[Cam]

Oh, my God. Yes, you do. No, you fake yawn. What are you looking for? Oh, you 100% fake yawn. You'll do it in conversation.

[Peyton]

You know my figure.

[Cam]

It's when he's, like, getting on to somebody.

[Peyton]

Whoa. No, that's not. When I do it.

[Cam]

Yeah. Oh, yes, it is. No, when you're like, you don't really want to tell the truth and you don't want to really talk about what the subject at hand, you go like this. You go, bro, I'm not even trying to be like that. It's just business, bro.

[Peyton]

That's not true. I don't do it. In those instances, I do do it.

[Cam]

You do.

[Peyton]

No, I don't. No, I don't.

[Cam]

I genuinely don't.

[Peyton]

Mine is whenever I want to leave a conversation or I have nothing to say, that's genuinely. It's like. Like whenever. You know that wrapping up part of a conversation and no one knows how to end it.

[Cam]

I'm.

[Peyton]

Wow.

[Cam]

It's only 5:30. I'm tired.

[Peyton]

That's a real one. That was a real one. Okay.

[Cam]

My God.

[Peyton]

Okay. Yeah.

[Cam]

Sticking on yawns, but off of them at the same time.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

The reason we might still be wheezing for oxygen right now, our poor little squishy brains.

[Peyton]

Why?

[Cam]

We had a total of 2 hours of sleep in Los Angeles.

[Peyton]

We did have a total of two hours of sleep in la. That was because of the show. In the after party, we went to Saddle Ranch.

[Cam]

The show ends at 11. We get back to our hotel around 11:45. We're out the door. 12:15 to go to Saddle Ranch, where we just hang out and enjoy each other's company. We get back to the room around two.

[Peyton]

That's. You already skipped a step. You skipped a step. And this is what I want to expose Cam for. I don't know if I'm able to say this on the Internet. Cam literally embarrassed the hell out of us on Sunset Boulevard in the heart of Los Angeles right after our live show. Dawg, when I say I have never been more ashamed to be Cam's friend than in this moment.

[Cam]

It was you, too.

[Peyton]

No, it was not me. No, it was not me.

[Cam]

You're not just putting that. That's not a one man Letterman. That's not a one man patch. That's a team effort. No, that is a team effort.

[Peyton]

It's okay.

[Cam]

If I tell this story, we all go. You already started. We can't.

[Peyton]

Oh, we were in California. Los Angeles, California. Now we are adults. We're grown men. Marijuana is legal in Los Angeles. 100%. So by the hotel, there was a dispensary.

[Cam]

Good dispensary. Really good dispensary.

[Peyton]

So we were saying, hey, we've been working hard. After the show, we're just gonna. We're gonna buy this from the dispensary. We're gonna take one or two little puffs, take the edge off, and it's legal.

[Cam]

I'm not doing anything shady. I'm not having to hit somebody. I show him my id. I am a citizen. I would like to buy your grass.

[Peyton]

Yeah, it was. It was, it was. It was. It's great. It's a great system they got going on over there.

[Cam]

And to be fair, I wanted a little curveball. A little 94 mile an hour curveball. Little misdirection from the liquor. Yeah, I just wanted to not go drinks tonight. Drinks is always fantastic. I said, hey, I'm in California. Let's switch it up.

[Peyton]

And you could tell we don't really do this often because of this. What happened? Right. We get the said marijuana from the dispensary.

[Cam]

I am going to interrupt you if you. If you me just let.

[Peyton]

I'm telling 100 truth.

[Cam]

Okay.

[Peyton]

We are leaving the dispensary, walking to Saddle Ranch. It is like, literally, like a four minute walk. It is easy. So we're just gonna walk and smoke this as we're going into Saddle Ranch. Completely legal.

[Cam]

Because you can do it on the sidewalk. Kind of looks cool.

[Peyton]

So cool. There's other people doing it.

[Cam]

Yeah. You don't have to, like, go into, like, someone's backyard or a garage. They literally just whip out that. People are literally just smoking weed. Like, it's like cig.

[Peyton]

Yeah. Congrats. It's great, right? So we're walking. Cam pulls out the joint. Then he pulls out the smallest lighter I've ever seen in my life.

[Cam]

Okay.

[Peyton]

It was a. It was a lighter that literally fell off the conveyor belt. And, like, whenever they were making lighters, it's like a third of a lighter. It was this big.

[Cam]

It really was. Because. Okay, he just said it. We don't do this often. We don't do this regularly. And I don't need a lighter. I need a lighter right now. And that's it. And it was $0.89. And it literally was the size. If you fold your finger from the first knuckle to the second.

[Peyton]

Yes.

[Cam]

That was the size of this little Bic lighter.

[Peyton]

Yes. It's. Whenever you're measuring, it's like. It's the same increments you use. Right. It's that one.

[Cam]

So you go, I don't know what the hell she talking about. I'm about nine.

[Peyton]

So we were walking, and Cam pulls out the lighter, pulls out the joint, and he goes, everybody stop. I go, what?

[Cam]

Cause we were approaching Saddle Race.

[Peyton]

No. He goes, I can't walk and light this thing.

[Cam]

That's also true.

[Peyton]

And I said, really? Also, I said, you can't put your thumb down and light this piece of paper.

[Cam]

Sue me. I know. I can't.

[Peyton]

So we're like, all right, Cam, whatever. We hit this, like, brick wall that's on the sidewalk, like the street axis. Everybody's people walking past, cars going by. It's fine. Normal cams. The light kept blowing out.

[Cam]

It was. It was windy, bro. It was a. It was an LA night. It was windy, man.

[Peyton]

And so I go camp. Put your hand over the light block the wind. He goes, okay. He covers the side of his face. He goes, it's not lighting. Loud as. Now we're starting to get some attention from the bystanders, right?

[Cam]

We are. But also, this lighter sucks, man. It's so small. Our thumbs are big already. I mean, my thumb is like. It's covering the whole lighter. So to put the little roll part. It's like a fifth of my thumb. And it was hard.

[Peyton]

So then it's a task. So that goes on for, I kid you, like, two minutes straight. Cam trying to figure out his hand placement. Over the. Over the. Then K. Rob gets his premature hands. K. Rob. K. Rob has the smallest hands in human existence. He can hold six Fruit Loops in his hand before it overflows.

[Cam]

Kra gonna lie when he lays against Comfy. They're cute.

[Peyton]

Look, they're cute on his stomach. Oh, my God. I can't wait to tell the story. What we walked in on in the hotel room. Oh, I forgot. We got to wait till Patreon.

[Cam]

Hello.

[Peyton]

Freaky. We said poor beers. Oh.

[Cam]

Oh, oh.

[Peyton]

It literally took two minutes. We were gone for two minutes. It was 8am what the. It was 8am and we left for four minutes.

[Cam]

8:30. And when we first walked into the room, he was.

[Peyton]

He was papped up. He was bapped up.

[Cam]

Oh, no, stop.

[Peyton]

All right, we gotta tell that on Patreon. Oh, we gotta tell that on Patreon when K. Rob's here. Okay, look.

[Cam]

Oh, my God.

[Peyton]

We gotta move through the slider store. Oh. So K. Rob puts his little kid hands over Cam's hands.

[Cam]

He said, they're like this word for word. He said, man, come here, brother.

[Peyton]

It's like this. Cam's putting his hands. There's four hands on this. I'm sitting there like, there's no way. There's no way.

[Cam]

And you know. Okay. You know, Peyton. Y' all might know Peyton if something would be deemed embarrassing.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

And it's happening in our group, and he's not a part of it. Instead of banding with your brothers and then conflict resolution, out he goes. I don't know them.

[Peyton]

I start to walk away.

[Cam]

My people. I'm not.

[Peyton]

I'm not lame because I'm seeing other people on the side of the street giggling.

[Cam]

Oh, we're getting looks and laughs.

[Peyton]

Looks and laughs. I don't like looks or laughs. And they're both happening at us. Right? Right.

[Cam]

So then you can tell it all. I'm telling your part.

[Peyton]

So then Cam's like. They come up with this brilliant idea. There's, like, this thing in the middle of this sidewalk, this, like, electrical thing, a big electrical box, like, in the middle of the sidewalk, like, right by us. They go, okay, let's use that to block our bodies. Cam's flicking the thing. We look at the electrical box. He's doing that for, like, a minute. Still can't get it. He looks at the electrical box. There's a sign saying extremely flammable. No lights next to it. Cam almost blew us up trying to get high. Blew the block up on Sunset. I kid you not. It took us like, 15 to 20 minutes to get this thing lit to the point. There was. There was this couple. These two guys walked by, and they're like. They thought Cam was trying to do crack cocaine. They looked at him because he was literally hunched over the other. He was like.

[Cam]

Oh, oh, oh. Oh, no.

[Peyton]

Oh, you gotta.

[Cam]

You gotta resurrect. Oh, you'll be smelling that for weeks. Oh. Oh, Good morning.

[Peyton]

But that's the. That's the lighter story.

[Cam]

Oh, no, the hell it's not. Because he's leaving out pivotal, very valuable intel.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

So I fail. K. Rob talks a lot of. Brings a little tiny hands up. Come here, bubba. It ain't that hard.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

He fails. So I go, hey, Big Dick Johnson. Master guy, huh?

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

You come light if it's so easy. Peyton proceeds to fail.

[Peyton]

So the lighter's this big. It's hard. It is. And by the time y' all gave it to me, all the juice was gone.

[Cam]

No shot. My whole point being, yes, I looked crazy. Yes, I am the lead and the cause of said embarrassment. But not a single one of us could get them on the lid until we finally did. And Peyton was fuming mad. He was like, jesus Christ. People think we're doing heroin.

[Peyton]

He said.

[Cam]

They think we're smoking crack cocaine. It's just that it's this one pre roll.

[Peyton]

My God. Oh, my God.

[Cam]

We're never doing this again. He was so. You know Peyton, when he gets in that embarrassed bag, he. He needs whatever the source of embarrassment is to die quickly, quickly. He needs it to be dead. Quickly.

[Peyton]

Quickly.

[Cam]

I am. I'm going to do a quick and utterly shameless plug.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

You absolutely cannot miss this week's Patreon. This week's extended.

[Peyton]

Oh, my God. You.

[Cam]

Please can't miss it. You are not in the Koala club. You literally have to join. It's going to be one of the funniest things we've ever said.

[Peyton]

All tears get extended, right?

[Cam]

All tears get extended.

[Peyton]

Please. Watch it, dude.

[Cam]

Oh. Oh, for the love of God.

[Peyton]

When I say that story is probably going to be the funniest.

[Cam]

And I'm going to say this because he's not here now, because this is a YouTube day. He's taking care of something. He's going to deny it. He's going to deny that story.

[Peyton]

I don't know if he will.

[Cam]

Oh, he's going to. I don't know if he will deny parts. I think he's gonna deny parts. Hand on Malachi, Ruby, Peyton, everyone. Malcolm. It's real.

[Peyton]

Oh, okay. It is hundred percent real.

[Cam]

Oh, God.

[Peyton]

Okay, L.A. thank you so much. I was at La Cams thing. Yeah. Dude. Oh, my God, that was so embarrassing.

[Cam]

Oh, okay. No, now, this isn't just la, but it happened in la. To where. It made me realize. To where I had to. I remembered it.

[Peyton]

What?

[Cam]

Now? That was a lot, though. That was a lot for me. That.

[Peyton]

Try it again.

[Cam]

Now, this happened in LA and it caused me to remember to say this.

[Peyton]

Sure.

[Cam]

Am I Dr. Seuss?

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

This happened. Now I'm gonna tell you.

[Peyton]

Yeah, There you go.

[Cam]

There needs to be a smell requirement for Uber blacks, period. End of story. It needs to happen.

[Peyton]

What do you mean?

[Cam]

There's no way in hell I'm paying $160.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

For a car.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

To take me on this drive. And it smells like you completed a kickball game in your vehicle and there's no helping.

[Peyton]

That's your. That's your status thing right there.

[Cam]

Oh, my God.

[Peyton]

Status written.

[Cam]

I'm gonna put you on blast.

[Peyton]

Put me on blast.

[Cam]

Do not act like you didn't do that entire ride to the mall like this.

[Peyton]

Oh, it stunk like hell. No, it's not like, literally.

[Cam]

There's no like there. I'm sorry. As not like I asked you.

[Peyton]

Dude, I said you can't charge me.

[Cam]

That much money from covering my nose.

[Peyton]

I know. I said. I asked, guy, are you allowing people to take to your car? I said, is that a part of your service? Like, you have chargers, gum, and you can toilet.

[Cam]

You can just. My truck. It was.

[Peyton]

I mean, it was. No, it was one of the worst smells I've ever sworn in my life.

[Cam]

Now, now this is where I'm all be rational.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

I pay $18 for you to take me somewhere.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

Your car can fit. Your car can be on three wheels.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

I don't give a. I understand what I'm doing. If I am buying the literal top service that this app provides.

[Peyton]

Put an air freshener in your car.

[Cam]

Put a crack a window.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

Go get your filters changed. Yeah, Shower.

[Peyton]

Yeah, yeah.

[Cam]

Something.

[Peyton]

No, it's like. Or don't let people in here that stick. Yeah, it's like, it's like if it's your passengers, then I get it. But like, you know, I asked the guy, I said no. It is one of your services. You allow.

[Cam]

Human matter is in the back, but it's okay. It's unbelievable. Like, I can't, I can't go on any longer.

[Peyton]

You should know.

[Cam]

Podcast.

[Peyton]

This episode is brought to you by our friends at Shopify.

[Cam]

Now, I know we've said it before, Pete, but let's just roll down that. Don't remind me PTSD journey again. Couple years ago, we had the inkling, the itch to sell our first merch line. It was fantastic. But my God almighty, was it a pain.

[Peyton]

It was a very big pain and a thorn in my behind. Cam. We had to do everything.

[Cam]

Take the payment, confirm the payment, take the product, bag the pot, ship the pot, paint the thing, send the email, do it all, switch them. It was way too much.

[Peyton]

It was way too much. Way too much. But thank God we found Shopify. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e commerce in the US from household names like Mattel and Gymshark to brands that are just getting started.

[Cam]

That's exactly right, Pete. If you want to accelerate your content creation, Shopify is packed with with helpful AI tools that will write out product descriptions, page headlines, even enhance your product photography.

[Peyton]

I'm telling you, you don't know how much of a game changer those things are.

[Cam]

And best yet, Shopify is your commerce expert with world class expertise in everything from managing inventory to international shipping, to processing returns and literally everything else. If you're ready to sell, you're ready for Shopify.

[Peyton]

Turn your big business idea into with Shopify on your side, sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com ysk. Go to shopify.com ysk that is shopify.com.

[Cam]

Ysk.

[Peyton]

No one to the rest of the episode.

[Cam]

Shopify.

[Peyton]

Shopify. The you should know podcast. I saw this thing on Tick Tock, right? It's a very popular. I don't even know if it's very popular. I think it had like a couple hundred thousand views. But I'm starting to find my side of Tick Tock and this guy scary. This guy asked a brilliant question on Tick Tock and now it has consumed my brain for the past like four days, right?

[Cam]

Oh, God.

[Peyton]

Movie theater layouts. Do not make sense how? Think about the architecture of a movie theater, okay? You see that big building and you walk into it. How is there 17 auditoriums in there?

[Cam]

Now that I agree with.

[Peyton]

That makes no sense.

[Cam]

I agree with to the max, dude.

[Peyton]

That guy on TikTok brought this up and it's consumed me.

[Cam]

That is so. No, no, it's. It's almost. It's like fake because you look at it from the outside and you're like that. The thing that does is when you walk into your auditorium, right? And it's vast.

[Peyton]

Yes.

[Cam]

Very big. Can sit over 100 people.

[Peyton]

Yes.

[Cam]

And then you go. It feels like six theaters should fit in this building.

[Peyton]

Right.

[Cam]

But there's 24.

[Peyton]

There's 24 in those screens. How much wall do you have?

[Cam]

I don't. It's fake.

[Peyton]

How much wall do you have?

[Cam]

I'd be willing to say when you walk into a Cinemark, you're entering a portal. There's no way that's the same building.

[Peyton]

God and God bless. If they have that 40x box, 3D board. 40x experience. Who the put a spell on this place? Are you kidding me? Dude? Honestly, it doesn't make sense. Honestly, it doesn't make sense.

[Cam]

It really does.

[Peyton]

So think about a big rectangle building, right?

[Cam]

Yes.

[Peyton]

This. This Tinsel Town, the Cinemark, this AMC whatever it is. You. You just see it. It's. It's a proportionate building. It's a proportionate building, right? A rectangle.

[Cam]

It looks good.

[Peyton]

You walk into it. It is hollow. Yeah, it is a full lobby with Massive lobby. Massive lobby. And then just the sides have theaters. Just the sides. Just the sides of theaters cam. And there's 24 100,000 inch screens in there.

[Cam]

All sit over a hundred comfortably. They go up. So it's like, what point do they. What point do they intersect? Dude, why am I watching Avatar but I'm not hearing the sinners? Like, there's no.

[Peyton]

I'm just.

[Cam]

I'm way too close. But it's so good.

[Peyton]

It is something we have just accepted and it does not make sense.

[Cam]

Portal.

[Peyton]

I want somebody. I want somebody to send me a video of them building a movie theater or else I won't believe it. I'm not even stepping foot. And God forbid if it's a movie theater inside of a mall.

[Cam]

Oh, no, for the love of God.

[Peyton]

How am I on the third floor?

[Cam]

Yeah, how am I? There's only three floors in the mall. How am I on the fourth?

[Peyton]

You go to the third.

[Cam]

That's what movie theaters you Walk in the theater, you walk all the way to the top.

[Peyton]

Where am I?

[Cam]

Am I hanging on top of the mall? Literally.

[Peyton]

Literally. People are too comfortable inside of movie theaters like you, you. You don't understand that. That makes no sense.

[Cam]

Dude, I'm not gonna lie. I think that might have been the best. The best point yet. Dude, the mall, movie theaters, the mall itself. Think about this. The building.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

From the highway. You know the mall we're talking about.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

It is a clean top. Clean top, clean top.

[Peyton]

You can stand on there.

[Cam]

You can stand on. It's straight.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

The movie theater's on the third floor. The mall advertises. We have three floors.

[Peyton]

We have three floors. One.

[Cam]

Shopping. Shopping movies. Yeah, shopping. Shopping movies. You get to the theater. What happens if you're on the. Where the does that seat go?

[Peyton]

And not even that. And not even that. When you are on the third floor and you walk into the lobby of the theater. I can see the ceiling. Yes, I can see that ceiling.

[Cam]

I know I'm sitting higher than that. I know. Where am I? I'm outside of the mall. I'm watching a movie that I'm no longer in the mall, but I am.

[Peyton]

It really makes no sense.

[Cam]

If I have to go, if I have to walk down to the bathroom or buy some popcorn or Peanut M&MS.

[Peyton]

I'm in the mall, right.

[Cam]

If I go back to my seat to watch the movie.

[Peyton]

Right.

[Cam]

I'm basically at a pull up movie and not in the mall.

[Peyton]

Me. We didn't even think about the projector rooms. What, how deep does this wall go?

[Cam]

Are you having hangouts in.

[Peyton]

Dude, who's back there? Oh, I mean, dude, I tell you, that has consumed my brain.

[Cam]

That is a mystery.

[Peyton]

Like it. I don't care about the. The car in the mall anymore. I don't care about any of that.

[Cam]

How and how are the walls so soundproof?

[Peyton]

So soundproof.

[Cam]

I watch a war movie. It literally feels like I'm in the battle. No, but it's people next to me watching but crying.

[Peyton]

But it's not even actually soundproof because you're walking past every theater. I could hear, but then as soon as I get in that theater, I'm the only person. We're the only people here. That's so true.

[Cam]

You're in the hallway, you hear every movie.

[Peyton]

Yes.

[Cam]

You go in the theater, you only hear yours.

[Peyton]

There's so many left turns that weren't designed for this mall. How many left turns and theater alleys do you have? And how can I walk out like oh, my God. It doesn't make sense.

[Cam]

What? No, I'm really kind of. I'm kind of spooked right now.

[Peyton]

I'm telling you, it is.

[Cam]

It is expensive for movie theaters.

[Peyton]

Like the architecture.

[Cam]

Think about all that. The building, the screens, the technology, but the soundproofing alone.

[Peyton]

I'm starting to think the architecture of a movie theater is more impressive than. Than aviation. I'm starting to think that I have.

[Cam]

A hot take on aviation.

[Peyton]

Oh, my God. Say it.

[Cam]

How are we not perfected?

[Peyton]

How is it not perfected?

[Cam]

Is aviation perfected?

[Peyton]

I think so.

[Cam]

Ask the air India flight 11A. What?

[Peyton]

11A.

[Cam]

What is that?

[Peyton]

That's the seat he was in Survivor. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's why the price of 11A has gone up.

[Cam]

What the 11A are you talking about? Across the board, 11A now costs more.

[Peyton]

Yeah. The seat 11A.

[Cam]

That's a fact.

[Peyton]

I think so. Yeah. The seat has gone up. It's like. It's like Elvis Presley's guitar. He wasn't nothing but a hound dog jumping all the time.

[Cam]

He ain't Mythical pool. Oh, that was so good. All airlines have upped seat 11A.

[Peyton]

I think. I think so, dude. I think, like, the resale value, it's like. It's like the Red October. It's like a. Virgil, you can't be.

[Cam]

Laughing too hard about this.

[Peyton]

No. People did die.

[Cam]

That was horrible.

[Peyton]

And rest. And rest in peace to you.

[Cam]

But my thing is we're trying. We're like. We're trying to leave this planet, and we're trying to go to the red dust ball, Mars.

[Peyton]

It's like, I don't have no interest in going to Mars.

[Cam]

But I'm saying we haven't perfected aviation.

[Peyton]

I think aviation's pretty perfect.

[Cam]

No, the. It's. What do you.

[Peyton]

How is it not perfect?

[Cam]

Do you understand what perfect is? No flaws.

[Peyton]

Well, nothing's perfect but my Lord and savior, Jesus Christ.

[Cam]

I agree, but I'm saying we're not really that close to perfect.

[Peyton]

I think we're pretty close to as perfect as you can get on aviation. There's not much we can get better.

[Cam]

Literally three months ago, there was planes dropping left and right. Yeah, but that's left and right.

[Peyton]

Yeah, but if we want to really get into our tinfoil hat, I'm saying there's always going to be accidents, there's going to be mistakes. Yes, but I'm saying the whole structure of aviation, you know, post 2001, I think we really ironed out the wrinkles.

[Cam]

I think we ironed out some wrinkles, too. Started checking some things. But I'm saying there's. We're nowhere near perfect. We def. We. Hell, we got. We bought an ironing board and a steamer.

[Peyton]

Doug, I ate French toast on the way to Los Angeles.

[Cam]

That's because you're a rich. I go, you know what I had? I had. I had a bag of sun chips this small. And the ladies next to me burp. That's what I ate.

[Peyton]

No, I'm not gonna lie. I did feel. Normally, I don't feel bad because I give you the. Obviously, you can come up here if you want. But then I look. I feel bad when I look back and I see Robbie fighting first.

[Cam]

What?

[Peyton]

He's trying to pop up. Oh, play.

[Cam]

He word for word.

[Peyton]

Said.

[Cam]

He said, baby, man. I mean, it's a bit steep. It's 900, but hell, that travel path, that's a hell of an investment. He said, I feel bad for the sitting next to me. If I ain't papped up on a plane, he said, I'm be sitting there.

[Peyton]

Okay. Do you not think aviation is almost perfect? What's wrong with it?

[Cam]

Hey, no, it's not almost perfect. How so many thanks. Are airports enjoyable? Let's start.

[Peyton]

There is. I do find. I do find solace in airports.

[Cam]

Okay, you're not Gandalf, so leave the language to the side.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

You find solace?

[Peyton]

I do find. I find it. Solace.

[Cam]

Yeah.

[Peyton]

Peace.

[Cam]

That's the. The definition. If I look it up right now, says peace.

[Peyton]

It's a synonym.

[Cam]

So it's not a definition. No, it's synonymous. Define it.

[Peyton]

Okay, it doesn't matter. I. I find happiness and enjoyment in airports.

[Cam]

Yes, thank you, normal person. And I don't believe that.

[Peyton]

Why?

[Cam]

Every time we're in an airport, you complain. We both complain.

[Peyton]

No, I don't. No, I do not. I genuinely do not. I don't complain. What do I complain about? The only thing I complain about is airport bathrooms. Because why are so many people in there?

[Cam]

I was about to say, why do.

[Peyton]

So many people in airports at home? Like, I, like, like, like, I. I can't even pee in there. Because. Because there's a. Oh, there's a seven footer, £745. Literally emasculating in this airport bathroom. The.

[Cam]

It's so funny. You said it yourself. Because I was definitely gonna say airport bathrooms.

[Peyton]

Dude, airport bathrooms are the only thing that.

[Cam]

I hate them.

[Peyton]

Dude. They need the more private areas or I'm starting to go to this Delta Sky Club.

[Cam]

Do we need to go once. I bet that's the vibe. But no, aviation's not perfect.

[Peyton]

The only thing I could change about aviation is the way we board.

[Cam]

The way we board is awful. First off, K. Rob literally almost started a union.

[Peyton]

Like, oh, my God.

[Cam]

He almost started a gofundme in a petition in the airplane tunnel to get on this plane. There's 50 people listening to him speak. He said, I mean, seriously, me sideways. How hard is it? Put the people on back the plane first. Everyone just goes, goes, goes.

[Peyton]

Do you think we should start boarding airplanes back to front?

[Cam]

Yes. Now there's. There's two things.

[Peyton]

I think that it will tip or something.

[Cam]

There's two.

[Peyton]

Weight distribution.

[Cam]

Oh. Oh, man.

[Peyton]

Right?

[Cam]

There's not too many times. Now, p. I'm gonna say this because I love you. And then we can get into it. I need you to know this. There's not too many times that when you say something stupid. I know you're a beautiful creature. You speak your mind. You've. You've very creative papa Picasso esque thoughts. That right there made me want to scratch my arm to the point where blood almost comes out. That icked. That was. I mean, that's like me watching you get on a ride. Like watching your little feet dangle. Why me a man?

[Peyton]

Dude, that's honest. You think it was an honest thought.

[Cam]

You think the thousands on thousands pound plane is going to tip if 50 people go straight to the back first?

[Peyton]

If weight wasn't a problem, then they wouldn't check the weight of my bags because guess where they load the bags, Cam.

[Cam]

Where?

[Peyton]

The bottom back.

[Cam]

Exactly.

[Peyton]

So that's what I'm saying. If they start putting all the heavy bags in the back and then all the people in the back first, guess what's gonna tip? The plane.

[Cam]

The plane is not. That's not a go. Pay to shut your mouth and hold that plate, you stupid big calf idiot. That was a lot. And I'm sorry. The plane is not going to tip all three of all of us. And K, Rob and Pierce and sand and Javante and Ryan. We could all jump in the back of a pickup right now.

[Peyton]

Yes, it could tip.

[Cam]

Are you mental?

[Peyton]

I'm. If it's. If it's a ridgeline. Yeah, it's gone.

[Cam]

Are you.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

Pierce's truck. It'll. Ting. Tunk ting.

[Peyton]

You're acting like weight distribution doesn't matter on heavy utility. Weight distribution matters on literally everything.

[Cam]

Peyton, where are the wheels on a plane? Let's break this down the middle. What?

[Peyton]

The plane. The Plane wheels are in the middle of the plane.

[Cam]

You think aircrafts land like this with the middle. You think they hit the middle of the plane? You think the middle of the.

[Peyton]

Yes. I've sat in the middle seats been a while, but I sat in the middle of the plane. I'm joking. I've sat in the middle of a plane before, and I literally felt the wheels come out from under me. I felt it. It goes. I felt it.

[Cam]

I mean, this is. This is getting more rich by the second brother.

[Peyton]

Then you explain to me why we don't. We don't. We don't tell. Then you explain to me why we don't fill up the plane from back to front. If it's not weight distribution, what is it?

[Cam]

Status and not giving a.

[Peyton]

What does status have to do?

[Cam]

Because they let people that pay more get on the plane first, no one wants rich. And then second, we don't want to.

[Peyton]

Go on the plane first. The people that fly first class, we don't want to go on the plane first.

[Cam]

Oh, your name dropping, huh?

[Peyton]

You already said it.

[Cam]

Oh, I never said where you were. I just said you had good money in your. Y' all. This is. This is.

[Peyton]

We don't want you to sit on the play verse because. Because we're sitting there for 45 minutes. We're sitting there for 45 minutes, and I'm not gonna lie. I'm starting to. I'm. For the rest of tour, I'm not boarding the plane in the first. Like. Like, I'm gonna be the last person aboard the plane. I'm smart.

[Cam]

I told you to do that because. No, but you said. No, I can't. I can't. They're making me.

[Peyton]

That's not what I said.

[Cam]

They gotta give my glass of champagne. They're literally making me. They're gonna hit me. My diamonds with a tester.

[Peyton]

Stop it.

[Cam]

They're gonna make it.

[Peyton]

Stop it. That's not what I said. Because.

[Cam]

No.

[Peyton]

Jingly, as a human being, I start to feel bad. Like, it does not feel good when.

[Cam]

You see all those poor souls.

[Peyton]

No, no, no faces. No, it's not that.

[Cam]

Because they get to 33E, they're. I mean, they're working to get that back of the plane. They're sweating their balls off. They got six carry ons. Because they don't got 40 balls to check a bag. Oh, God. Let alone let them have a crying baby. You're sitting there wi Fi. Oh, I'm not gonna peacock on sipping chardonnay, dude.

[Peyton]

I do. I'm not gonna lie. There was a crying baby in first class. I said, you don't. Oh, wow.

[Cam]

You literally go. You go, excuse me, ma' am. I'm not sure if that person bought a ticket. I didn't know you could double up in first class. Just saying.

[Peyton]

I'm completely. Okay. That's a complete joke. I know some of y' all get sensitive when I make money. Jokes. It's a joke.

[Cam]

It is a joke. But listen, perfect world.

[Peyton]

Perfect world, right?

[Cam]

First class. Because there's first off, there's never more than like 14 seats in first class. There's never more than like seven rows.

[Peyton]

Right? Right.

[Cam]

So that small group of people, you get on the plane first before anybody yalls AC is cranking. You get comfy, you're chilling. Then it should. Now this is the only problem. And I'll tell you why they know this. Then it should literally be start at 33, or at least bare minimum take rows like 33 to 28. That's group one.

[Peyton]

Yes.

[Cam]

27 is. That's group two. It literally just go bing, bing, bing.

[Peyton]

100%.

[Cam]

They should, but they don't do that.

[Peyton]

Why?

[Cam]

Because the overhead space. So the overhead space fills up and then the people at the very end, like Group 8 people have to check their.

[Peyton]

No.

[Cam]

Yes.

[Peyton]

No. Because if you start at the back, if the back people fill up the bag, it's perfectly aligned with everybody up to the front.

[Cam]

Now, how does that work? Genius. If I'm telling you. If I just told you it, like I just said it, and you just went, no. How does that work? We've been on planes.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

I've had to do this. You get on the plane late.

[Peyton]

Right. Everyone's already different.

[Cam]

But I'm saying 20, 30 people left, but go, hey, we got no more space.

[Peyton]

That's if you're late. If you're late, you're late. That's your fault for being late.

[Cam]

Like it's a tardy bell. Like a bell went off. I'm saying I was in Group 8. I get on the plane, I'm a part of the last one.

[Peyton]

Yes, but.

[Cam]

So there's still 20.

[Peyton]

But that's not going to apply, though, because the first class people will be the last people on the plane in their overhead space. You can't touch that, sir. Overhead space. It's a fact. You can't. No, this is. We know this is reserved. I'm saying the luxury of being first. Part of being first class is not boarding the plane first. It's leaving the plane first. That's the luxury part of it.

[Cam]

That's the luxury.

[Peyton]

The main. One of. The main luxury part. Other than the nice beef tips in.

[Cam]

The middle of the sky, not the chardonnay in the magazine you can get. I physically watched a guy play craps. Watching a man. I was watching a man bet money on the back of a Delta plane. I don't know how that happened.

[Peyton]

You can get chardonnay on any seat you're at. You just gotta pay for it.

[Cam]

And y' all don't.

[Peyton]

We do pay for it. It's a part of our seat that we pay for.

[Cam]

Oh. Oh, man. I want to start filming.

[Peyton]

I offered you first class. Like, I don't know why you're. You're. You're acting like you. Like you just choose to be Peter Pan. Like, I don't know. Like, that's your fault. I don't know what to tell you, dude.

[Cam]

Oh, you're close. You're close to what? Godless scum. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding.

[Peyton]

I'm kidding.

[Cam]

Hey, so I'm kidding.

[Peyton]

Can you give me another one, please?

[Cam]

Check that one.

[Peyton]

No, it's. It's got in it. What? It's got in it from under the couch. Look, I got a question. Shut up while I'm speaking to you. I got a question, right? We were helping our friend K. Rob move into his apartment, right?

[Cam]

Yes.

[Peyton]

He said, let's go furniture shopping. And I know this is a touchy subject with us.

[Cam]

Oh, my God.

[Peyton]

He said, let's go furniture shopping. And I said, okay, what do you need? He said, a couch, some chairs. A bed? And I said, what about a rug? And he goes, well, that would be nice, but I'm going furniture shopping. And I said, well, a rug. A rug is furniture.

[Cam]

I'm siding with the dog. I'm siding with the dog.

[Peyton]

For what?

[Cam]

Rug is not furniture.

[Peyton]

A hundred percent is furniture.

[Cam]

Rug is not furniture. Period. End of story.

[Peyton]

How?

[Cam]

A rug is not afraid. It's an accessory.

[Peyton]

Store chairs, accent chairs.

[Cam]

No, no, that's furniture. That is a literal piece of furniture.

[Peyton]

What makes furniture furniture. Okay, I know we've talked about this before, but it was years ago, and now I've gotten a little older and maturer.

[Cam]

Really? You sure?

[Peyton]

You sure? Yeah. You sure?

[Cam]

Furniture is something you're sitting on? That is not furniture.

[Peyton]

What? They can't see what that is?

[Cam]

That is a rug. Yeah, there's this. This is. This is disgusting. But this is our rug, right? That's not furniture.

[Peyton]

What's the difference between what is. Define Furniture. Furniture in your.

[Cam]

Don't cut me off because I know you're. As soon as I say so. The first sentence. There's a comma, not a period. Don't.

[Peyton]

Okay, so in your definition, what is furniture?

[Cam]

Furniture furnishes the room and. Don't you. I know it's hard. I know it's hard, you little idiot. Don't. I see you're getting goosebumps. Furniture is something that furnishes the room. That is used. That is used. There's an actual used using factor to it by humans.

[Peyton]

By people, first of all. Okay, let me. Let me get into that. Oh.

[Cam]

Oh, man. No, no, no, no. Stop. No, seriously, stop.

[Peyton]

I don't like messing up. First of all, you cannot define something using its own word. You can't say furniture furnishes. That's an oxymoron.

[Cam]

That's not.

[Peyton]

I learned that word the other day.

[Cam]

I know you did. You clearly learned it the other day because you said it wrong.

[Peyton]

Okay?

[Cam]

It's not oxymoron.

[Peyton]

So you can't.

[Cam]

It's not the same word.

[Peyton]

Furnishing and furniture is not the same thing. No, that's like pissing and passed.

[Cam]

No, it's not.

[Peyton]

That's like passed 10 minutes ago.

[Cam]

No, it's not. That's like cleaning and clean. Or cleaner.

[Peyton]

Exactly. It's the same thing.

[Cam]

No, it's not. Any cleaner and cleaning is not the same thing. I hate you. How about that? What's the same as that? Off.

[Peyton]

Okay, but listen. And you said you got usage out of it. You can get usage out of a rug.

[Cam]

No, there's utility. Rug is the core utility and usage.

[Peyton]

Is the same thing.

[Cam]

The painting, furniture.

[Peyton]

Yes, it can be.

[Cam]

No, the. It's not. It is decor. It's decor. Literally. It decorates. That's what a rug does. It decorates the room.

[Peyton]

Not all the time.

[Cam]

Holy.

[Peyton]

So, okay, so. So a floor mat.

[Cam]

Decorating.

[Peyton]

No, but you get usage out of that. You wipe your feet on it.

[Cam]

That is. That is a doormat. One that's out. Oh, oh, oh.

[Peyton]

Please try. Please try.

[Cam]

Okay, so when we go to Nebraska Furniture Mart, right?

[Peyton]

Let's say Ikea for the people.

[Cam]

We go to ikea. Where the rugs at?

[Peyton]

Where are the rugs at? In the. In the store.

[Cam]

Okay.

[Peyton]

What section? Hole. I don't know. I don't know. Oh, I'm sure.

[Cam]

You don't know. I'm sure. Just slipped your little stupid little.

[Peyton]

I just don't know. Where is it?

[Cam]

Not by the furniture.

[Peyton]

Is ikea. It's like, okay, is Ikea a furniture store?

[Cam]

Yes.

[Peyton]

So do you think they would sell non furniture in there?

[Cam]

I don't know. They sell meatballs, don't they?

[Peyton]

That's a food court. That's not the furniture store.

[Cam]

You can buy frozen meatballs in Ikea and take it home in.

[Peyton]

In the. In the food court.

[Cam]

No, you know, by the checkout.

[Peyton]

Yes, you can.

[Cam]

Oh my God.

[Peyton]

Okay.

[Cam]

Oh my God. Hey, get your. Hey, get your. Get your windpipes ready for a cam win. Oh, it's coming.

[Peyton]

No, no, listen. Okay, okay, so say you go to it. Say you go to a Dick's Sporting booth.

[Cam]

Yeah.

[Peyton]

So you go to a Dick Sporting goods. Are they gonna sell non sporting things there, do you think? Sporting goods. A sporting store. Yes or no? So are they gonna sell non sporting stuff there? So answer every answer.

[Cam]

Every answer I'm asking.

[Peyton]

No, no answer. Every answer. No answer.

[Cam]

Yeah, answer yes, they're going to sell.

[Peyton]

There is a non sporty stuff there.

[Cam]

Is every answer me.

[Peyton]

Answer me.

[Cam]

I just said yes. You twitch.

[Peyton]

So what are they going to sell?

[Cam]

That's what I'm asking you. Shut up. Is it every single piece of clothing? Sporting clothing?

[Peyton]

Yes. Holy athleisure.

[Cam]

Yes, you are mental. How cart is Carhartt athletic?

[Peyton]

Yes. Yes.

[Cam]

Oh my God, Yes. Oh my God.

[Peyton]

They built houses in that. That's pretty athletic.

[Cam]

That doesn't make you an athlete. You can hold a tuba your whole life. You're not an athlete now. That was. That was some childhood trauma.

[Peyton]

So there are more athletes than baseball players? No, construction workers are definitely more athletes than baseball players.

[Cam]

That's not the point. I've seen a jacked couple construction and.

[Peyton]

I've seen some thick baseball.

[Cam]

Yeah, I've seen some fat lards. But anyway, I love. I mean, I don't love baseball. It's cool sport. That doesn't mean they're athletes. A Carhartt jacket. No, no. You're the king of semantics. Until it bends you over and you know, you absolutely know. Carhartt is not athletic.

[Peyton]

It is.

[Cam]

Okay. Anyway, back to the rug. That is decoration. Our lights, furniture, it's.

[Peyton]

It's a multi utility unit is what rugs are. It is decoration and utility real estate.

[Cam]

It's a multi utility unit. The triple net under the second apron literally allows me to do an FHA loan at 6.2%. Shut your up. Shut up, man. Oh my God. Oh God. He started to sense the corner he's getting walked into and he goes, It's a multi cook incorporated Fortunate function unit. Shut up. Save that for someone else.

[Peyton]

I bodied you.

[Cam]

Oh, no, you.

[Peyton]

I just bodied you.

[Cam]

Okay.

[Peyton]

Multi utility unit. Rugs are a multi utility unit. They can be used to wipe feet, which is utility, and it can be used for decor.

[Cam]

If you are intentionally.

[Peyton]

Is a couch not used as decor, too? No. So you don't get. You don't get couches that match the ambiance of your living room.

[Cam]

That's because you want all the colors to match.

[Peyton]

So is that a decor? Is that not decor? I'm asking you, is that not decor?

[Cam]

No, it's not decor. He knows it's not decor.

[Peyton]

How is it not?

[Cam]

Your bed is not decor. Your desk is not decor.

[Peyton]

Yes, it is.

[Cam]

The lights you put around the desk is decor. The plant you put on your desk.

[Peyton]

It'S a multi utility unit.

[Cam]

Shut your. Dude, you're about to get job.

[Peyton]

Joe.

[Cam]

I don't know, Jod. Listen, the fact that you just said you willingly wipe your feet on a rug, first off, you are a barbarian. You don't wipe your feet on rugs. That is.

[Peyton]

Yes, you do, dude.

[Cam]

That's.

[Peyton]

You genuinely do.

[Cam]

That is a doormat.

[Peyton]

You can wipe your feet on rugs, Cam.

[Cam]

That's why. I know. I tell you, you're gross. You're stinky. What's the point of a rug if.

[Peyton]

You can't wipe your feet on it?

[Cam]

To differentiate. Because it's decor. So there is no point. So why switch the colors?

[Peyton]

So what?

[Cam]

Oh, my God, he's proved it. Exactly.

[Peyton]

No, no, no yelling. I'm not done. No, no, no, listen. No, I'm saying. I'm asking you. If I can't. If you can't wipe your feet on it, what's the point of it? Yes or no? Do you not. Whenever you go to pick out a rug, do you not put your toes in it to see if it's comfortable?

[Cam]

If you were barefoot.

[Peyton]

Yes or no?

[Cam]

If you were barefoot in the furniture store, I'd spit my hand and slap you.

[Peyton]

Yes or no? Do you. Do you not check if it's comfortable?

[Cam]

I've never whipped out my toes and checked if it's comfortable.

[Peyton]

You said this is a comfortable, bro. You've said that to me. And what would be the point if you're not wiping your feet on it, you don't. This is getting out of hand.

[Cam]

You're out of. Oh, oh, I'm sure it is getting out of hand when you're getting dog walked.

[Peyton]

Whatever you're getting.

[Cam]

Absolutely dog walked.

[Peyton]

Put it in the comments. Who do you think won that One rug is decor. Shut up and stop talking about it. You're starting to get a little racist.

[Cam]

Rug is decor, okay?

[Peyton]

Period. Okay, you're in the comments. You're wrong.

[Cam]

Stupid idiot.

[Peyton]

You're wrong.

[Cam]

Hey, go to first class.

[Peyton]

You're wrong. The you should know podcast. This episode is brought to you by our friends at Huel. And let me tell you about Huel. If you have no time to cook, there is no problem. Hu is a complete meal in one bottle with 35 grams of protein, 27 vitamins and minerals, high fiber and low sugar. So you feel full, focused and ready for your day. There's no prep, no cleanup. Just grab and and get out of there. Huel's already sold over 500 million meals around the world. And now it's your turn to try new customers get 15% [e-mail] when you use our code YSK. Tell them why you love Huel so much. Got one.

[Cam]

All right, let me talk to you about Huel and their nutritionally complete ready to drink meal. And the black edition chocolate is my personal favorite. But I absolutely love Huel because new to this dad thing, right? New to the dad thing. Chaotic mornings. We got to come to the studio and get to work, get to cracking. I got an hour right in front of me. I don't have time to cook right. But I wake up very hungy.

[Peyton]

Hungy.

[Cam]

Big guy, big stomach, need food.

[Peyton]

Oh, that makes sense.

[Cam]

I literally take shower, get dressed, grab heel, go to car.

[Peyton]

I love it.

[Cam]

I show up to work completely satiated, full, and it has 27 vitamins and minerals, 35 grams of protein, and 7 grams of fiber. So not only does it fill me, but it is genuinely very good for you.

[Peyton]

It is an all in one handy bottle. So start saving time and money without compromising your nutrition today with this exclusive offer for new customers of 15% using our exclusive code YSKHUL.com that's 15% off for new customers using our exclusive code YSKHUl.com please see our description for the terms and the conditions. Skip the stress, not the nutrition. Try heal today for complete nutrition.

[Cam]

Bottled.

[Peyton]

Now on to the rest of the episode, the you should know podcast.

[Cam]

Okay, let's simmer down a bit.

[Peyton]

Let's simmer it down.

[Cam]

The story.

[Peyton]

And can you not speak to me like that again on the public airwaves? Like, you know, it did make me feel good. You called me a chalky. A jockey. What'd you call me?

[Cam]

A jockey.

[Peyton]

You said something about jocks.

[Cam]

I said I'd spit my Hand and slap you.

[Peyton]

I always wanted to wear a jock strap.

[Cam]

I did too. I never did.

[Peyton]

Never did. Could never find one that fit. Hit it.

[Cam]

Go Payta. Go Peter. Go Payta.

[Peyton]

That means I got a lot of. Just kidding. I really don't. I really don't.

[Cam]

Did you ever stuff a sock?

[Peyton]

Do you want me to be honest?

[Cam]

Yeah.

[Peyton]

Kick messenger, sixth grade. It's the first time that those kind of pictures started to get. Get going. And, you know, at the time. At the time, I wasn't working with much, and I remember her, she said, let me see that thing. And I said, oh, no. At the time, my family used DirecTV and those DirecTV remotes, you remember them? They were long, but then they were shaped weird. It was like skinny than big. So I was like, how am I gonna finesse this? Which one am I gonna use as the base? Big side was the base. I put that in my drawers and I sent that. She said, get that remote out of there. I blocked her. Is that what you were asking? No. All right. Yeah. Overshared. Embarrassing. Very embarrassing story.

[Cam]

Anyway, back to my.

[Peyton]

I should have flipped it. I should have used the. The skinny side as the base, but I feel like that would have been a hammer.

[Cam]

She's like, you have you live around bees? Back to my four year old nephew.

[Peyton]

What?

[Cam]

What?

[Peyton]

You never brought up your nephew? You literally asked, have you stuffed before?

[Cam]

Oh.

[Peyton]

Oh, let's.

[Cam]

That's right. Though that actually did happen.

[Peyton]

What?

[Cam]

No, that sounds.

[Peyton]

Speak in full sentences and clean this up.

[Cam]

I'm saying I said I have a. I never said that. I never said that.

[Peyton]

You just asked me, have I used a sock to stuff. It's the only thing you said. And you said back to.

[Cam]

Oh, my God.

[Peyton]

I didn't like that.

[Cam]

I'mma clear my name and my lineage real quick. I originally was going to say I have a story to tell about my 4 year old nephew's birthday this weekend, but then I ran to him.

[Peyton]

Cute kid. Weird, huh? Cute kid.

[Cam]

Weird Daxon.

[Peyton]

Love him. Love him with all my heart.

[Cam]

How is he weird?

[Peyton]

He's not weird. Weird birthday party.

[Cam]

Strange party. No, no.

[Peyton]

First of all, I didn't get invited.

[Cam]

Oh, no. Oh, yeah.

[Peyton]

Second of all, yes, you did. I got invited by y' all.

[Cam]

Not by the parents, because they said.

[Peyton]

They have my number.

[Cam]

They said they.

[Peyton]

They literally said, if you weren't invited, don't ask to go. That's from your son's stepfather. He said that? Duke Dennis.

[Cam]

Don't say that.

[Peyton]

Duke. Dennis. Twitch tv.

[Cam]

My sister literally said, peyton cj, right?

[Peyton]

Oh, did you. Did you get that invite?

[Cam]

She probably didn't want to invite cj, but she knows that y' all live.

[Peyton]

Together and it would be weird, right? But let me say it. It was weird. The thing I heard about the birthday party, it was from your wife. She said, yeah, because I was like, oh, Justin, I'm not gonna go, but I'll send him a gift. I was like, what does he like? She goes, doesn't really want toys. And I said, strange for a four year old. What does he want? Band Aids.

[Cam]

Band Aids?

[Peyton]

And I said, did he get hurt? She was like, is he recovering? She goes, no, he just wants to have Band Aids. And I said, is there anything else? Because I don't really just want to go to CVS for a four year old. That's a burp blunt. Here you go. What's it taste like? Yeah, that's hot. And then she goes, or just give him stuff to run over in a pickup truck. Yeah. And I said, what? And then I'm like, okay, definitely not a party I want to go to. Right? It's cool. Love them, though. Then I see images from this birthday party and there is a guy dressed up as Spider Man.

[Cam]

Oh, no, you gotta let me tell.

[Peyton]

Okay, sorry.

[Cam]

Okay, first I'm gonna tell a story that happened before, right? And then his actual birthday party. I'm gonna tell a couple parts.

[Peyton]

Go ahead.

[Cam]

So two days before his party, my mom was out there watching my sister's kids. And it was time for them to go to sleep. Baby Murphy, she's asleep. Corley's laying in her bed, daxing. She hugs Daxon. She's, whatever, rubbing his back, right? Go to sleep, buddy. She goes, okay, I'll see you on Sunday for your party. She starts to leave the room. He starts bawling, crying, screaming, crying.

[Peyton]

I don't like that.

[Cam]

And she goes, oh, buddy, what's wrong? What's wrong? Like that type of crying, hyperventilating.

[Peyton]

Those used to be my favorite kind of cry as a kid.

[Cam]

So she picks him up and she's like holding him and she's like, buddy, what's wrong? And he goes, I just don't really think I want you at my party.

[Peyton]

Oh. He said, that's a Lisa. Oh, no, Lisa.

[Cam]

And then she went, wait, what? He said, I just really don't think I want to invite you.

[Peyton]

Dang. I know that killed Lisa. I know that shattered your mom's heart.

[Cam]

But then she. Okay, buddy, well, you know what? You're really tired. We'll Talk about. He's like, no, I'm pretty sure he.

[Peyton]

Goes, no, I don't have to think about it anymore. You're not coming. That's painful.

[Cam]

He finally got tired again, and then he laid her down, and he was like, grammy, I take that back. I'll see you Sunday. Just fell asleep, so that's crazy. Fast forward to. So my nephew's party was a Wheel Smash party.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

Strange kid.

[Peyton]

That's a boy.

[Cam]

That's a Betsy Most boy. I want to break.

[Peyton]

Yeah, it's Fire.

[Cam]

Literally told people to not bring him gifts. Just bring stuff that his dad can run over in his truck. So we get there, we're eating pizza. Everything's going. My sister goes, all right, everybody go outside. Time to smash stuff. I'm like, oh, God. In my whole. This whole time, I have this, like. Like, question. When does repetitiveness kick in?

[Peyton]

Right?

[Cam]

Like, when are they gonna be like, all right, it's a bit much.

[Peyton]

Yeah, when is. When is. What's. We have to have this scheduled, right? We have to, like, end time to this.

[Cam]

So we go out there, and no one's doing anything. And she goes, we're gonna. We're gonna wait for a second. I got a surprise coming. When I tell you I literally hear a Marvel song off in the distance, and I turn around, there's a man on his truck dressed as Spider man, literally moving on his truck like this. Pulls up to the function, hops off. And I'm just gonna say this. I get what you're doing. I enjoy that you're doing it for the kids.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

This sounded like a racist Spider Man.

[Peyton]

How.

[Cam]

I mean, he was hick.

[Peyton]

Oh. He goes, we're gonna put you in a web, boy. With great power comes great responsibility.

[Cam]

Now get your back outside.

[Peyton]

No, I'm just kidding.

[Cam]

But he literally jumps off the truck. He goes, how did I heard of somebody's birthday? I was like, it's like Matthew McConaughey as Spider Man. And he's talking. He goes, oh, is it your birthday? The kid's like. And then he goes, what about you right there? And it was Daxton. He was like, huh? He was like, yeah, it's my birthday. He goes, how you feeling? Daxton goes, four. He goes, no, no. How are you? Daxton goes, four. And he goes, yeah, all right. Sounds about right. He goes, I got a present for you. Takes out a bat, one of those bats that's like this, an inflatable. He goes, here you go, buddy. It's a good old bat. And he literally goes, like this. Daxton goes to reach for it. And the guy goes, clocks Daxton bed, strikes my nephew on the top of his brain, his pre developed brain with a bat. And I literally went, hey, man. I was like, what are we doing? He goes, oh, I'm just kidding. Grab it again. Daxton goes. He goes, it's him again. I was like, stop hitting the kid. Get your hands off of him. He goes, I'm just kidding, buddy. Here goes to the other kid, he goes, let me see your hat real quick. I'm sorry to incriminate you. He literally goes like this. I'm not kidding, bro. He literally goes like this.

[Peyton]

My other got the stitching, little cousin.

[Cam]

Jake, he has his hat on and he literally walks up to Jake and he goes, that's a nice little ball cap. Looks better on me.

[Peyton]

Here you go.

[Cam]

I'm just kidding.

[Peyton]

And throwing.

[Cam]

And I literally went, did I miss like a comic? Like, is this his villain?

[Peyton]

Is this like the bullies? This is Venom.

[Cam]

I said, this kid's being a prick. I said, who is this guy? Take your mask off.

[Peyton]

He says, this is Venom.

[Cam]

He goes around, he's just all the kids. And then he hits his thing. Oh, he goes, now Daxton, for your birthday I got you one other thing. It's my web blaster. Pulls out a can of Silly String.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

Shoots my nephew in the face with Silly String. He goes, Daxon's screaming. I mean it was like half cool, half night.

[Peyton]

What was Mark doing?

[Cam]

So then everyone's laughing, okay, so everybody.

[Peyton]

Else have a good time.

[Cam]

At the end. He goes, all right, I'm just kidding. All jokes aside, Spidey's got to go do some Spidey business. He goes, he goes, now all the little kid, all little fellas, come on. All little critters get right. Like that's, that was his lingo. Critters, Critters. Did Spider man, everyone say critter?

[Peyton]

Who said he doesn't know that's any of his vocabulary?

[Cam]

He goes, all the kids come right here. But it's such a surprise. You got to close your eyes.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

They go, oh. All the kids are like four to six years old. He goes, all right, ready? Open more Silly String. Two cans. Right in these kids faces. They're like jumps on his truck. He hits the top, he goes, play my song. See ya. Make sure it's in that payment, parents. And takes off. And takes off. That's the Spider Man.

[Peyton]

Holy. That Spider man was off the Sandman and the Green Goblin, you know what I mean? That was Fire.

[Cam]

He was smoking that goblin dart back Goblin.

[Peyton]

That Dark Goggins should just let me have the moment, right?

[Cam]

Sneaky golem in the pocket.

[Peyton]

You know, it's funny, I. Oh, no, wait.

[Cam]

I have one more thing. Now, you know my brother, right?

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

Okay. My brother's a very wound type man. He's just like.

[Peyton]

Oh, yeah, he's very aggressive. Yeah.

[Cam]

They were on a 16 day road trip.

[Peyton]

You know, at that point you're a nomad. If you're taking a 16 day trips. Wait, 16 day or hour?

[Cam]

16 over 5,000 miles in this truck.

[Peyton]

So 16 hours?

[Cam]

16 days.

[Peyton]

16 days, that's like 150 hours, right? How many hours is in 24. So let's just say like, right, 16 hours.

[Cam]

Like if you did 24 times 10, though, right? Like that's 240.

[Peyton]

Yeah, it's different with the miles per hour. But I'm not going to lie. If you're on the road for 16 days, you are homeless. No, you don't. You don't have a flag. You don't fly a creed that you Honor.

[Cam]

No creed, you, Honor, no code.

[Peyton]

You know what I mean? You are. You are a part of land 100%. You're a land.

[Cam]

You are.

[Peyton]

Go ahead.

[Cam]

They started from Houston. They did the 16 day, went through all sorts of parks. Wyoming, Colorado. They went to Yellowstone.

[Peyton]

Doesn't sound fun.

[Cam]

And this is on their way back. This is in Texas. So they're three hours away from the crib. So they stop at Dachshund's party.

[Peyton]

Okay, that's nice to be nice.

[Cam]

Right? We go back now. It's time to wheel Smash. First thing is ramen noodles.

[Peyton]

Raymond.

[Cam]

Yeah, ramen. Next thing, cheese balls. All right. Literally went. This is getting real old real quick. Next thing, they pull out lotions and toothpaste.

[Peyton]

Now here we go. That's fine. I like to see things squirt my bro. Ask cj. I make him do it.

[Cam]

Oh, what the.

[Peyton]

He said, that's my Tuesday entertainment. He knows what's coming after recording.

[Cam]

Good morning, Tim.

[Peyton]

Here we go.

[Cam]

Oh, my God. Here we go.

[Peyton]

So lotions.

[Cam]

Lotions, right? My brother's in the middle of telling me a story about how he watched a grizzly bear devour a baby elk at their campsite. There was elk. His daughters were watching. They said, daddy, daddy, there's a bear. He said it was like 80 yards away. And he was like, this grizzly bear came out and mauled an elk. He said, I watched it front row. Like it was at National Geographic. He said, I literally was like, oh my God. He said he mauled it. He's in the middle of telling that story. Mark runs over the toothpaste. It literally goes, shoots my brother, only my brother, all up his body. He goes, oh. He screams. He's on a 16 day road trip and he gets shot with Jergens. And it went from toe to his stomach. And he literally went. And then I run off laughing. He comes up to me, he goes, I took a shot of Jergens for your son because they stepped in front of Malachi for it. You can only imagine.

[Peyton]

And the fact he can't do if it was marked right, it's a black.

[Cam]

Belt, can't do anything about it. He's got to get back in his car for the 17th consecutive day, drenched in lotion. He went inside, made a coffee, threw some Tito's in it.

[Peyton]

That is.

[Cam]

And my grandma was still. Or my mom, Dax's grandma was still unwanted at the party. Crazy weekend.

[Peyton]

I'm not gonna lie. If Malachi ever did that to me, telling me he doesn't want me anywhere, I would make his life a living hell.

[Cam]

Oh, yeah, you gotta fight.

[Peyton]

First of all, your son's already wildly, wildly aggressive towards me.

[Cam]

A little inappropriate too.

[Peyton]

Like, I'll be like, Malachi getting his face do his favorite little. He'll smile, he'll be like, haha.

[Cam]

Yeah. He starts swinging. Yeah, dude.

[Peyton]

Yeah. Me and Malachi have had some boxing matches.

[Cam]

Dude, you have to. Now, as a man, you probably shouldn't. You need to. You need to let him get a good. Grab your hair once.

[Peyton]

He grabbed my beard yesterday.

[Cam]

No, no hair.

[Peyton]

No, no. Oh, I'll literally be like, oh, yeah.

[Cam]

No, seriously, dude, he's strong. I played it off one time, I was like, if I look away, it doesn't really count. He grabbed my shirt.

[Peyton]

Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. So I genuinely think, and I say this, and I love Malachi. I die for it. Well, I'd kill for him, right? I'd do anything for Malachi.

[Cam]

I love him as soon as he can talk and he looks you in the eye with his sweet little voice and says, I love you, Uncle Pete. You would die.

[Peyton]

Don't think he's going to be that kid. He's going to be like, ok, so.

[Cam]

You'Re going to try to make him that kid.

[Peyton]

No, I don't. I want him to be sweet and innocent.

[Cam]

You're literally like, bro, do you like science or. Come on.

[Peyton]

No, that's not it. I'm going to want him to be A musical theater kid, but he's going to be trying to tough and, like, I can already tell. What I was saying is I am deeply concerned about your son's future in school. I don't think your kid's going to be a part of the free society of school. He is definitely an ISS kid.

[Cam]

He's going to white polo and slacks every day.

[Peyton]

Dude. So many cheese sandwiches for that kid. Like, dude, he. He is. He is a fighter. Like, he fights.

[Cam]

He is handsy than a.

[Peyton]

Like, he punches, he throws.

[Cam]

He shocked my mom. He shocked her.

[Peyton]

She was holding him.

[Cam]

She's like, oh, she. She takes his hands, touches his own head and goes, malachi. And then touches her head and goes, grammy.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

And does it like 10 times.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

The second that she let go of his hand, he went right in the jaw.

[Peyton]

Dude. It's so cute. But at what point do we not let that slide anymore? No, I know he doesn't understand what he's doing.

[Cam]

As soon as he gets, like, level three of mobility, he's done.

[Peyton]

Because it's a point. Like, I held him yesterday. He goes where he wants. He's so strong. Center, gravity. Like, he. He goes where he's strong, Ash. And he's mean. And he knows he has his father's head.

[Cam]

Yeah.

[Peyton]

And so he'll use that as a weapon.

[Cam]

Oh, my God. He'll hit you right. He'll hit you right on your lip, dude.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

Affect him, but it cuts your.

[Peyton]

Yeah. And then he's a little. Oh, I love him to death, but he's gonna be a. Oh, he's gonna be a hellraiser. I can already tell.

[Cam]

Fat little gut.

[Peyton]

Dude, he's not really that fat after he eats.

[Cam]

He has a fat little gut. It looks like an alcoholic.

[Peyton]

Yeah, I wish he was fat.

[Cam]

Looks like the.

[Peyton]

No, I know where you. Yeah. Oh, yeah. The 68 mm.

[Cam]

No. Oh, do you want me to say no?

[Peyton]

Cuz we. I think we've gone through this whole thing without any. No. So I think we've done. I think we've done it. Is there anything else you want to talk about or do you want to go into people's favorite segment? Oh, I love it when you got surprise things for me.

[Cam]

Now this. Now this happened, right? This happened organically with my wife at the house.

[Peyton]

Oh, something ghetto.

[Cam]

Not a bad guess. Not a bad guess.

[Peyton]

Let me clear the throat. You know what's funny? I was walking past the bathroom, and she was. She can word for word, recite the whole amp cipher. It's really weird. Oh, Really? I was trying to be myself. I got everybody mad at me for it.

[Cam]

I had to be so hard. They don't need a cellplus battery for it.

[Peyton]

All right, let's go. Anyway, what do you want with your wife?

[Cam]

So, the other day. My wife made a very average dinner. She made a very average dinner.

[Peyton]

Mainly she does. No. No spaghetti. A lot of effort today, Liv. I'm kidding.

[Cam]

I'm kidding, too. She always. She makes good meals. Yeah, but it was. It was. It was actually really good. Chicken breast and aside. CJ's the main. CJ eats six bowls.

[Peyton]

Yeah. No spaghetti.

[Cam]

CJ eats six bowls.

[Peyton]

He was real hungry.

[Cam]

She made a chicken breast. Side was a box. Mac and cheese.

[Peyton]

Oh, gross.

[Cam]

Now you dress it up. A little salt, little pep. We sit down, right?

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

I don't think anything of it. We're talking about our days. It was the day before we left, actually.

[Peyton]

Okay.

[Cam]

And it dawns upon me how she's eating this Mac and cheese.

[Peyton]

How is there.

[Cam]

I'm gonna ask you. Right.

[Peyton]

Is there different ways to eat Mac and cheese?

[Cam]

There's mult. I would consider them to be two ways.

[Peyton]

Okay. What are the two ways to eat Mac and cheese?

[Cam]

Via fork, via spoon, without any thought. Do you think it is appropriate to eat macaroni and cheese with a spoon?

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

You're Hannibal Leco.

[Peyton]

Isn't that the conventional way of eating Mac and cheese?

[Cam]

You stab Mac and cheese. You stab Mac and cheese.

[Peyton]

I would argue you go to a.

[Cam]

Restaurant with to go plate fork.

[Peyton]

Wait, what?

[Cam]

You go to a restaurant with a to go plate that has Mac and cheese. You get a fork. Every time we eat up here, we get Mac and cheese, you get a fork.

[Peyton]

I would venture to say you can get more done with Mac and cheese with a spoon than you can a fork.

[Cam]

I don't care about your logistics. In your research, Mac and cheese is a noodle.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

You use forks for noodles.

[Peyton]

There's different kinds of noodles. Pasta noodles. Like if you do long noodles. Yes. You do a fork because you have to wrap it.

[Cam]

It's a noodle in general.

[Peyton]

No, Mac and cheese is. Hold on. Mac and cheese is more of a cereal. You understand? It's a bunch of little pebbles in a bowl. And you get the most pebbles with a spoon. That's like eating cereal with a fork. It's wrong and weird. Mac and cheese is a cereal of the noodle community.

[Cam]

No, it's not. Mac and cheese is a noodle. Rigatoni fork.

[Peyton]

Don't know what rigatoni is.

[Cam]

Fork Penne fork. Macaroni is the. It is a noodle.

[Peyton]

I think even on the add cheese.

[Cam]

And now it's your own dish. It's still a noodle. Use a fork.

[Peyton]

I think even on the box, you use a spoon. I think even on the box of Mac and cheese. There's a spoon in the commercials.

[Cam]

Holy.

[Peyton]

I think you're trying to be so upper class of a fork. I think that's strange, Bubs.

[Cam]

I would argue a fork is the lesser of the two.

[Peyton]

Fork is definitely more elegant than a spoon.

[Cam]

No shot.

[Peyton]

Spoon is kitty.

[Cam]

Forks are violent.

[Peyton]

Yes. Which means you need more responsibility and manner with that.

[Cam]

That doesn't make it elegant.

[Peyton]

Yes. You need more responsibility and manner. They're for adults.

[Cam]

Elegant is something sweet, prim and proper. A spoon's never gonna hurt you like a fork could. A spoon's never gonna. Your top grill up. Fork can ruin you.

[Peyton]

Yes. But that means you need more elegance and precision with it.

[Cam]

Elegance.

[Peyton]

You can give a spoon to a toddler and they're gonna. They're gonna do whatever. A fork, that's a. That's a dangerous thing. That's not for you. That's for delicate adults.

[Cam]

Delicate, yes. Elegant, no. If something's elegant, it's good.

[Peyton]

You're saying that word wrong. Say it.

[Cam]

You say it. No, you go elegant. That is wrong.

[Peyton]

Say it. No. Think 1, 2, 3.

[Cam]

Elegant. That's not right.

[Peyton]

No, you're. You are now.

[Cam]

No, it's really hot, though.

[Peyton]

Elegant.

[Cam]

Elegant, yes. Elegant, no.

[Peyton]

100%. You're supposed to use.

[Cam]

If something's elegant, you don't have to take care. You don't have to call it. It's perfect.

[Peyton]

Yes. You do have to coddle it. Elegance is coddled. Elegance is dainty. It's sweet. You have to be careful with it. Fine china. You ever use fine china before?

[Cam]

Yes.

[Peyton]

You got to be elegant with it. You can't just throw that in the dishwasher. That's elegant, shorty.

[Cam]

Like a thousand dollar plane.

[Peyton]

Fine china. But you're not listening to me. A fork is definitely more elegant than a spoon.

[Cam]

I don't think either one of them are elegant in your silverware. Sure aren't.

[Peyton]

I have. I have way more expensive silverware than you. That's why I have less of it.

[Cam]

You're out.

[Peyton]

First off, Cam. Cam.

[Cam]

You still use it. Watch on silverware is crazy.

[Peyton]

I do pocket watch on silverware. Cam still has the silverware that has the circular base at the bottom that the two textured ones.

[Cam]

No, I don't.

[Peyton]

Mine's all silver. Cam has a little, like, circle thing that has the designs on it.

[Cam]

No, I do not.

[Peyton]

Yeah, I have. Regular Einstein. Where'd you.

[Cam]

Where did you get your silver from?

[Peyton]

Oh, don't lie. What's that place called? B. Not bh. A H. Yeah. Y' all probably haven't heard of it.

[Cam]

I got my. From ikea.

[Peyton]

Oh, yeah. No, no.

[Cam]

And I don't mind it.

[Peyton]

Yeah. But that's why you're. That is literally why your dishwasher smells like blood.

[Cam]

Your dishwasher doesn't work. Your dishwasher is broken every time. So much grime, grease, and buildup every time you load it because you two behemoths are disgusting individuals that it breaks down.

[Peyton]

No.

[Cam]

How many times has your dishwasher been broken?

[Peyton]

No. Like, two, three times.

[Cam]

Yeah. In what, a little over a year.

[Peyton]

I've been in the house for three years.

[Cam]

You. You've been in that house?

[Peyton]

Yes.

[Cam]

Now, for the love of God.

[Peyton]

And you know, it's crazy. Y' all don't respect my house. When you come over and you break things and you. You clog things. Everybody does it. Y' all break my refrigerator.

[Cam]

I have not broken or clogged.

[Peyton]

Y' all leave everything in my garage. Garage. Y' all. Y' all don't respect my house.

[Cam]

This is the highest level of. Highest level of reflection. Reflection. Highest level of how you are literally naming the things that you do. He broke the toilet. You have a dishwasher. You leave garage.

[Peyton]

I'd never come to my house again then. No. Literally never come. No, no, no, no. You know, no, you can't. No.

[Cam]

I love your house. I'm gonna put that on me. I did not do that.

[Peyton]

And we're going back to the age old argument. I have a better couch than you do.

[Cam]

So you don't. Your couch has K, Rob used Q tips and fruit Loops in it.

[Peyton]

Yeah, because no one respects my stuff.

[Cam]

Exactly.

[Peyton]

Proves my point.

[Cam]

Not me.

[Peyton]

So you can't.

[Cam]

Yes, you do. Name anything. Name something. Name something that I've broken at your house.

[Peyton]

Name something you've broken more than you fixed.

[Cam]

Literally. One example.

[Peyton]

I don't keep score against my friends. That's just not the kind of friend I am. That's not the kind of friend I am. Let's get into people's favorite segment. You know what that is? Pop culture. Peyton and Cam. Pop culture with Peyton and Cam. Bow. Now, this might be old news by the time this comes out, and actually, nobody cares about it, but the NBA championship just happened. The Oklahoma City Thunder has won their first NBA championship. Now, we talked about this during the OKC show as a joke, and we talked about this before the NBA. It was like game one when it was our OKC show. And I sat on stage in front of the heart of okc. Paycom center was right across the street. I told them to their face, Oklahoma City does not deserve a Larry O' Brien.

[Cam]

No. 100%. 100% they do not.

[Peyton]

It's because we lived in Oklahoma City, and that city is the armpit of America.

[Cam]

Yes.

[Peyton]

It literally every building looks like it was burned down. And they tried to keep it together.

[Cam]

100%.

[Peyton]

There is no street lights in that city. So there is nothing fun in that city.

[Cam]

So lame.

[Peyton]

Where you're going to go, you got to go to a place called Bricktown and it's got a fake lazy river in it and a fuzzies and a Fuzzy taco.

[Cam]

A Cinemark, a Harkins theater. Yeah. And a Fuzzy's Taco.

[Peyton]

And if you want to really pop out, you can go to Norman and go to Logies and Meatball.

[Cam]

Yeah. You can go smoke hookah in a badly lit thing off 44th Street.

[Peyton]

Or maybe Celebration Station, a place that was built in the 70s that hasn't renovated once.

[Cam]

Go to Whitewater Rapids and leave with te.

[Peyton]

And so I was like. I was like, okay, this city sucks. Right? I love Oklahoma City because what it's done for me, it has a special place in our hearts. Right.

[Cam]

Forever.

[Peyton]

They don't deserve an NBA championship because of the city. And I said, maybe they could change my mind when they do win. They won in real time. They won yesterday. They won the first NBA championship yesterday. And I said, the first in franchise history with the league MVP on it. Right.

[Cam]

And scoring championship.

[Peyton]

The celebration from Oklahoma City Thunder after their NBA championship. Their NBA championship should be revoked.

[Cam]

It needs to be studied how bad that was. It needs to be research.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

On why no one that just won the title was happy.

[Peyton]

Literally, it. It seems like they won an intramural. Intramural college basketball championship. Yeah. How excited they were.

[Cam]

100. I mean, it was. I physically, with my own eyes, watched Chet Holgram. Buzzer goes off. Chet Holgram. You're the only one. This man jumped up, happy. I've won the highest thing possible in this sport. Jumps up happy, does a quick360. No one else is celebrating. He literally had to calm his own excitement. He literally went like this.

[Peyton]

It was depressing to watch. I was like, it was like this. And shout out To J. Will, friend of the show. Right. He's on. Okay. See, I texted him after the game. Congrats, bro. Thanks. Are you a champion?

[Cam]

I would. I would venture. I would venture by tomorrow, tomorrow being a Tuesday, every single player on that roster is out of the city. Every single one of them has caught a flight back to their home.

[Peyton]

They left that night. They're not. You can't celebrate in Oklahoma. They are remiss that they have to do a parade in that city. They're remiss.

[Cam]

And that's why I said that they have to wait till tomorrow. They're going to do that. No parade, and then they're all going to leave.

[Peyton]

I said they left and they're coming back to do the parade. They're going to spend the least amount of time they can in that SGA.

[Cam]

Should have literally let it hang and say, hey, boys. Everyone grab an outfit, get on the private jet. We're going to Los Angeles. And turning up tonight.

[Peyton]

They definitely. OKC should be suspended from NBA Finals until 2028.

[Cam]

Your ring should be redacted.

[Peyton]

They literally should give that ring to LeBron James. That's how much that city does not deserve it. That celebration was piss poor. That city. P poor.

[Cam]

I mean, I mean, seriously, I want to. I'm going to challenge y' all. I want you to look at the street view when they take that dumb door bus through the city. I want you to look where they're celebrating.

[Peyton]

You can literally drive in OKC any angle and see every building in that city. Any angle you drive, you can see every building. Three skyscrapers, and you can see all of them.

[Cam]

When one of your main attractions is a bass pro. Oh. Oh. There's no way there's a Keith Urban bar. Oh, my God almighty.

[Peyton]

Dude. Dude. I would rather. Oh, dude. Oh. If there's players on the NBA, in the NBA that play for OKC that are worth $200 million, they. They. They are wasting their money and their life in that city. I. I love that place. I love it. You can't tell why I'm speaking of it. That city. That should be. Move the team. Move the team.

[Cam]

Putting this out of a second.

[Peyton]

Exactly. Putting Dallas Mavericks in Las Vegas.

[Cam]

Put the. Put the Thunder in Vegas.

[Peyton]

Put the Vegas City Thunder. I don't care. What? I don't care. I don't care.

[Cam]

The Las Vegas Thunder. Dude.

[Peyton]

Dude. Dude.

[Cam]

It's bad.

[Peyton]

Oklahoma City. Oklahoma City. I follow people that live there because we lived there. They were like, celebration. The city won an NBA championship. There was six People at the bar. Six people at the bar. There's more people watching Love island at the bar than the NBA Finals.

[Cam]

100%.

[Peyton]

Never. And I mean never, Mr. Silva. I mean, rig the out of the NBA next year. There should never be low market teams in the NBA finals ever again. No one's watching that. Yeah, I. I'm watching Huda Shake. I'm not watching that. You know what I mean? I'm not watching that. I'm watching Ace be betray his friends rather than your NBA championship. And I have friends that are on those teams. Yes. I'm so sorry that. Now that worked me. That worked me up.

[Cam]

Oh my God. Just originated a headache in my brain. Oh my God. Your. Everything you said is so spot on.

[Peyton]

Yeah, that was my fantastic.

[Cam]

I don't even know if I need.

[Peyton]

To say I'm sorry, bro, but that, that, that literally upset me. Jay Will.

[Cam]

Christ. Jay Will went home and played. He played Warzone. He won a Hilary o' Brien. He went home and loaded up in the war zone.

[Peyton]

He sent the beer, almost threw up and went play War Zone. J. Woo. You're cool, dog. We talked on the phone. You're cool. What the.

[Cam]

He said, where's the tequila, dude?

[Peyton]

There's. Be careful, be careful, be careful. He's sipping a beer. Alex Caruso, you bald. Never, and I mean never disrespect King James like that saying. I finally got a real ring. Yeah, he's the reason you gotta bring. He's the reason you're still in the NBA. And I'm gonna tell Zach Urbanis to stop training you.

[Cam]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, you know you no longer have. You no longer have relations with Zach Urbanis in Austin. In Austin Pro Academy. Sit down and keep going.

[Peyton]

I'm calling Zach Urbanis. I'm gonna call Zach Urbanis. If this is Alex Caruso's trainer, I'm calling him. I haven't talked to him since years. God, this is like a Patreon episode.

[Cam]

There's a literal dm. There's a D.

[Peyton]

Money. Is it butt dial? No, this is a hundred percent. A. A real dial. Live on the air of the uchinel podcast. Can I ask you a quick question?

[Cam]

What's up, Zach?

[Peyton]

And Cam's here as well. What's up? What's the deal? Now you. You are affiliated and trained NBA champion Alex Crusoe, Correct? Two time NBA champion.

[Cam]

Two time.

[Peyton]

Okay. And that's what.

[Cam]

And I love that you said that, Zach.

[Peyton]

Yeah. And that's what I want to talk about. And, and so in his presser last night, he disrespected the king goat. LeBron Ramon James, the greatest of all time. He was joking. He was being sarcastic.

[Cam]

No, that's a good friend, and that's a hell of a cover up, Zach, but let's keep it real.

[Peyton]

He was 100 being sarcastic. Did you ask him yourself? No, but I know. I see he was being sarcastic. Why would he disrespect his own championship? That's what I'm saying. When he goes, finally, it's a real one. And I saw. And I like Alex, you know, he's. I was really rooting for him.

[Cam]

He's a defensive ball hog. Great guy, great skull.

[Peyton]

And that just hurt my feelings. So I just. You're the closest connect I had to making sure that he wasn't disrespecting the goat of all goats. Yeah, no, he was not. He was joking. Okay, well, because we did.

[Cam]

Now, I'm not gonna lie, Zach. I'm gonna be very transparent. We just said on air for thousands upon thousands of human beings that he no longer has relations with you due to his comments last night in the pressure.

[Peyton]

Yeah, we're gonna.

[Cam]

We're gonna sever that tie.

[Peyton]

Yeah, you guys are ridiculous. I gotta get back to work. Okay. I love you. I miss you, buddy. All right. Love y' all. All right, bye. Liar.

[Cam]

That's a good friend.

[Peyton]

All right, well, that's a great friend. That was Alex Crusoe. Straight Alex Crusoe. I'm kidding. J. Will. I'm kidding. It's all comedy. Congratulations. Celebrate better.

[Cam]

No, like. Like, get out of the 405, though. Like, leave.

[Peyton]

I'm Oklahoma City.

[Cam]

Dallas will have open arms if you come here.

[Peyton]

Honestly, for those two people.

[Cam]

Dallas. If fga.

[Peyton]

If.

[Cam]

If SGA came to Dallas right now. I'm not gonna say it too much.

[Peyton]

I should never want to watch who to shake more than. Oh, dude, get us out of here, dude. I would rather watch. I would rather watch seven hours of Love island than watch the NBA Finals ever again. I'm never gonna watch one highlight from that NBA Finals ever.

[Cam]

Oh, my. Oh, my God. I don't. Yeah. I'm never. I'm never gonna remember this ring. I'm never gonna.

[Peyton]

I'm never gonna.

[Cam]

Every. Every single superstar that the Eastern Conference winners. Pacers went up against, every single one of them, every single team they played tore the acl. Every single team. Damian Lillard tore his acl.

[Peyton]

What are you.

[Cam]

What are you pointing.

[Peyton]

I thought it was Achilles.

[Cam]

Oh.

[Peyton]

Oh, no, no. Didn't.

[Cam]

Didn't Achilles, not acl. Yeah, Achilles.

[Peyton]

Yeah.

[Cam]

Damian Lillard, Jason Tatum, and whoever that did the last one.

[Peyton]

It's okay. It's okay. We got it. We got it. All right, guys.

[Cam]

Oh, and then Tyrese did it himself. Oh, my God. Sga. Oh, my God. Anthony Edwards got hurt. Aaron Gordon pulled back. Jokers just wants to race horses and drink beers. Oh, my God. Give me Love Island. 10 out of 10. 10 out of 10 times.

[Peyton]

Anyway, that was a great episode. Pop culture paying.

[Cam]

Nick him.

[Peyton]

Pop culture paying.

[Cam]

Nick him. Bow. Hey, mate, you heard utes from the sixth side. We're coming to you soon. Croty. We're coming to the six soon. Cody, turn the six upside down. It's a nine. Now you utes need to be on your favorite manners.

[Peyton]

And a six, man, like Lou will. Two girls, then they get along like. Like on Lou will six. You and the six raised me right. That changed my life. Hey, all right. I'm not gonna lie. I'm so excited for Toronto because y' all brought the goats of music. Drake, the Weeknd, Justin Bieber, Celine Dion.

[Cam]

She's from Canada, I think. So I go. She's from Northern Rapids, Michigan. I'm just kidding. But yes, Toronto, you are next on the divide and conquer. The world domination. The Peyton vs. Cam world tour, presented by the youe Should Know podcast, is coming to Toronto next. First link below is youshanowstudios.com. that's where you can get all your tickets. Every single city has been amazing so far. We can't wait to see you. We'll see in about two weeks. And now I'm also just gonna say it. We're saying Toronto right now because they're the next stop. But it's hectic right after all of the East Coast. Y' all better be ready. Cause It's. It's like eight shows in, like 10 days. We got Toronto, Chicago, Detroit, Columbus, Philly, BC, Boston, and New York. It is all right. On the horizon. Make sure you get your tickets. Send this to a friend. Grab somebody. Go see it. Go by yourself. I promise you gonna meet friends if you do that. But it's a fantastic time. We can't wait to see you. And the next most important link is the amazing, beautiful community, the Koala Club over on Patreon.com.

[Peyton]

Don'T forget, we're gonna get to one of the craziest stories this week.

[Cam]

One of the craziest stories of all time will literally come out in two days. You have to go join. You have to watch it and you're gonna get a lot more than just one crazy story. Uploads multiple times a week. Last week, there literally was an upload every single day of the week. Unbelievable. We love our Koala Club members. They love each other and they've built something so, so special. Go check it out. But until then, appreciate you coming back. Confused casuals, get your good karma.

[Peyton]

Secret code. What is it?

[Cam]

Kenwin Goo. G O O. And it's really G O O, O. Goo.

[Peyton]

Get out, Oliver.

[Cam]

Get out of Oklahoma.

[Peyton]

Get out, Oklahoma. Get out, Oklahoma. We love you guys. Remember, one out of six wallabies don't make it home to Christmas. And we'll see you next time.

[Cam]

No. I know we're running quads, but, like, you just won the Larry O' Brien, bro. No. Okay, bro. Yes. I'll grab the Car 98 comedy podcast.

[Peyton]

Hopefully no one gets offended. That's gonna get clipped. We're gonna get on espn. I'm so sorry. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home in auto policies. Try it at progressive. Com. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states.