SURPRISING MY BEST FRIEND WITH A HOUSE! -You Should Know Podcast-

Summary

You Should Know Podcast Episode Summary

Title: SURPRISING MY BEST FRIEND WITH A HOUSE!
Release Date: March 17, 2025
Host: Peyton Hardin
Co-Host: Cameron Kennedy
Produced by: Wood Elf Media

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1. Introduction & St. Patrick's Day Greetings (00:00 - 04:20)

The episode kicks off with Peyton and Cameron exchanging playful banter to celebrate St. Patrick's Day. Peyton extends greetings to all celebrating the holiday, while Cameron humorously responds to Peyton's mention of "gingers," clarifying, “I'm not a ginger” at [03:11]. Their camaraderie and light-hearted teasing set the tone for the episode.

Notable Quote:

• Peyton: “Happy St. Patrick's Day to all my gingers worldwide.” [02:57]

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2. Parenting and Health Discussions (04:20 - 15:04)

Peyton delves into his experiences as a new father, discussing his son Malachi's first chiropractic visit. He expresses skepticism about the necessity of chiropractic adjustments for infants but acknowledges medical advice and familial encouragement. Cameron shares similar sentiments, highlighting his reservations but ultimately supporting the decision, saying, “So he's getting his first adjustment today.” [04:03]

The conversation transitions to Peyton's attempt at running after a hiatus. He humorously recounts his struggles with stamina, likening his experience to “hands and knees” running and expressing disbelief at others' ability to run effortlessly in public [15:04].

Notable Quotes:

• Cameron: “He's built like an s. But I was not on board. 100%.” [04:56]
• Peyton: “The worst anxiety ever is when you're holding up the drive through and you can't do anything about it.” [24:00]

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3. Anxiety in Everyday Situations (15:04 - 30:09)

The hosts explore common anxieties, particularly focusing on experiences in drive-throughs. Peyton shares a vivid story about waiting at a drive-through with 12 cars behind him, leading to accidental calls to emergency services due to his heightened stress [27:50]. Cameron echoes similar frustrations, discussing the inefficiencies and delays that exacerbate anxiety during such mundane tasks [25:14].

Notable Quotes:

• Peyton: “Imagine me walking into a pediatrician all hairy.” [08:00]
• Cameron: “There’s nothing you can do about it, dude.” [24:36]

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4. Humorous Anecdotes and Squirrel Encounters (30:09 - 44:21)

Peyton recounts an unsettling encounter where he witnesses a squirrel being run over, describing the emotional impact it had on him [20:53]. This segues into a playful discussion about domesticated squirrels and the absurdity of such an idea, with both hosts laughing over hypothetical scenarios involving pets and animals [19:33].

Notable Quotes:

• Peyton: “That squirrel, brother. Busy street.” [22:00]
• Cameron: “Squirrel on a leash. That'd be the dopest.” [19:07]

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5. Technical Difficulties and Ad Interruptions (Throughout the Episode)

Various segments of the podcast are interrupted by advertisements for sponsors like Mint Mobile, Pluto TV, Skims, Turtle Beach, Booking.com, and ZocDoc. These ads are seamlessly integrated into the conversation, often paired with humorous takes or quick transitions back to the hosts' dialogue.

Example of Ad Integration:

• Peyton: “The You Should Know Podcast. This episode is brought to you by Skims.” [13:31]

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6. Pop Culture and Streaming Services (44:21 - 60:52)

Cameron introduces a pop culture segment where he recommends the Hulu series "Paradise," praising its narrative and production quality. Peyton expresses interest in expanding their podcast content to include movie and TV show reviews, reminiscing about his earlier attempts in this niche [90:00].

The discussion includes comparisons to other popular shows like "Ozark" and "Bridgerton," with both hosts debating the merits and appeal of "Paradise." Cameron emphasizes the show's potential to rival established series, while Peyton contemplates starting a dedicated movie review segment on their Patreon [95:25].

Notable Quotes:

• Cameron: “Paradise is up there. It has the potential to compete with Ozark.” [93:35]
• Peyton: “If you have a girl on FaceTime, and you’re in the Chick Fil A drive-thru, she calls you a grown man child.” [48:29]

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7. Fun Segments: Trivia and Shower Beers (60:52 - 79:48)

To celebrate St. Patrick's Day, the hosts engage in a trivia game interspersed with humorous "gifts" for each other. They create a playful atmosphere by challenging each other with questions, leading to exaggerated consequences for incorrect answers, such as taking sips of beer.

A significant portion of the episode revolves around their infamous "shower beers" segment, where both hosts humorously debate the practicality and hygiene of consuming beverages in the shower. The banter reaches comedic heights as they imagine absurd scenarios involving multitasking in the shower environment [78:20].

Notable Quotes:

• Peyton: “I would much rather never shower again in my entire life.” [86:43]
• Cameron: “I'm sitting there like this. It's a circus dolphin.” [78:03]

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8. Reflections on Personal Growth and Family Embarrassment (79:48 - 90:00)

The conversation shifts to introspective reflections on personal growth, embarrassment, and family dynamics. Peyton discusses the concept of secondhand embarrassment, especially concerning family members who overhear their podcast antics. Both hosts acknowledge the humorous yet cringe-worthy moments that arise from their candid discussions [36:01].

Notable Quotes:

• Cameron: “You need a drink or something. You are not yourself right now.” [36:35]
• Peyton: “Sometimes I think about who I really think about is CJ's family.” [36:54]

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9. Concluding Remarks and Future Plans (90:00 - End)

In the closing segments, Peyton and Cameron reaffirm their bond and enthusiasm for future episodes. They tease potential new content ideas, such as dedicated movie and TV series reviews on their Patreon, and discuss upcoming tours and shows. The hosts wrap up with heartfelt thank-yous to their listeners, emphasizing community and engagement.

Notable Quotes:

• Cameron: “Happy St. Patrick's Day and thank you for coming back and spending it with us.” [97:14]
• Peyton: “If you've made it this far in the episode and you look down, you haven't commented, you haven't subscribed, you're wrong.” [98:25]

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Key Insights & Themes

• Friendship and Camaraderie: The deep bond between Peyton and Cameron is evident through their playful teasing and mutual support.
• Parenting Challenges: Both hosts navigate the complexities of parenthood, balancing humor with genuine concerns.
• Anxiety Management: They candidly discuss everyday anxieties, providing relatable content for listeners.
• Humor in Adversity: The hosts use humor to address awkward and stressful situations, making the content engaging and entertaining.
• Pop Culture Engagement: Their interest in current TV shows and willingness to expand podcast content showcases their adaptability and connection with audience interests.

Conclusion

Episode 156 of the You Should Know Podcast offers a blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and relatable discussions. Peyton and Cameron’s dynamic interaction, coupled with their ability to weave in and out of various topics seamlessly, creates an engaging listening experience. From celebrating St. Patrick's Day to tackling everyday anxieties and contemplating new content avenues, the episode encapsulates the essence of close friendship and authentic conversation.

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Note: Advertisements and promotional segments have been omitted to focus solely on the podcast's content and discussions.

Transcript

[A]

Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile with a message for everyone paying Big Wireless way too much. Please, for the love of everything good in this world, stop with Mint. You can get premium wireless for just $15 a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpaying. No judgments. But that's weird. Okay, one judgment anyway. Give it a [e-mail] Switch upfront payment.

[B]

Of $45 for three month plan equivalent.

[A]

To $15 per month required intro rate first three months only, then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See full [e-mail] this episode is brought to you by Pluto TV. Pluto TV has all the shows and movies you love streaming for free. That means laughter is free with gut busting comedies like the Neighborhood Key and Peele and Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Mystery is free with countless cases to crack from Criminal Minds Tracker and Matlock. And thrills are free with heart pumping hits like the Walking Dead and Defiance. Feel the free Pluto TV stream now pay Never the YOU Should Know Podcast hey everybody. Welcome back to the you should know podcast episode 156. Round of applause please. There we go, here we go. Happy St. Patrick's Day. Hey everybody, welcome back to the you should know podcast. If you are new here or if you haven't already, you look below, you see that subscribe button isn't pressed. You're wrong. If you look even more below that and you see that comment section, is it fulfilled with your name? Guess what? Even more wrong. Go and fill that out. Get your good karma. We have one more call to action for your good karma. You see that thumbs up button? Go ahead and press that. You see the little bell notification? Go ahead and ding that cuz that will tell you every time we post a video on here YouTube. Guess what? If you want more content you get content almost every day over on the Patreon. It's going to be the first link in the description patreon.com you should know podcast. You get all the uncensored ad free episodes as well as bonus episodes, extended episodes, more series, a bunch of different stuff behind the scenes. If you want even more we have a twitter at yskpod. If you want even more we have an Instagram at you should know pod on instagram. We love you so much. Much. Also if you want even more if you're part of a little older crowd, we have a facebook. We love you so much. Enjoy the rest of the episode. The you should know podcast. We got co host camp back in the studio.

[B]

Studio.

[A]

First of all to you I want to say something. I know.

[B]

I got something to say to you, too.

[A]

I know it's a national holiday for you. I know your heritage and your people are fighting strong. Happy St Patrick's Day to all my gingers worldwide.

[B]

Wow. Oh, my God. You've been knighted. All right, now come here.

[A]

Wait, is that offensive?

[B]

That could have been on the line.

[A]

I don't know. I didn't mean to.

[B]

The fact you addressed it to all gingers worldwide. I'm not a ginger.

[A]

Well, I just say, I assume that group is predominantly.

[B]

There's a lot of them. A lot of them. 85% minimum.

[A]

Can you accept the fact that you are.

[B]

I'm not a ginger.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I'm not a ginger. I did a 23 in me.

[A]

Well, your beard isn't black.

[B]

I come from Mongolia.

[A]

Nice Mongolian beef out of PF Chang.

[B]

Hits every time that stupid little lettuce wrap.

[A]

You see how quick I can get him hyped with that food?

[B]

See, now, real quick, guess what? So it is St Patrick's Day and you're not wearing green. So deep. Eep ber bum bum. Insert pinch attack. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Deep. Eat Bon Bon back to podcast.

[A]

He's a father.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Oh, my God.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Speaking of being a father.

[A]

Tell me about it. It's all we talk about with you now.

[B]

Oh, so this is gonna be a father thing that goes back into you.

[A]

And then back to you.

[B]

Jesus. Did you hear me?

[A]

Back to you.

[B]

Okay, so Malachi is getting his first adjustment, AKA chiropractor. AKA visit. Small hands on a sensitive back. Now you can burp better. Big time, buddy. Wait, no. Yeah, no. It's a thing. It's a thing. I was so not on board. So not on board.

[A]

You're telling me now? I. My for you page for the past year has been chiropractor videos. I've seen so many of the videos. It goes like this. Okay, right there. Just take a deep breath in. You're. You're telling me you're taking your how four week old. How old is he?

[B]

Seven. But I love that you pay attention.

[A]

You're taking your seven week old child to lay down on a table for a grown man to go here, right here. Why is he doing that? He's got the scoliosis of the back.

[B]

He has a little. Little.

[A]

Oh, he's got a little curve on him.

[B]

He's built like an s. But I was not on board. 100%. Was not on board. I said and doctor said, do it. Mom said, do it. My sister, who's a baby fanatic, she said, do it. So the reason is like his digestion and all that stuff. Right. So he's getting his first adjustment today. Yes, after we record. But we went in last week and he had his, like, checkup and whatnot. They're feeling his little head. Put this little sock.

[A]

Not too little.

[B]

It's a nice little head.

[A]

He is a.

[B]

It is not too big head is the quickest and first thing that grows on the baby. He's not going to be like his father.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

It's going to be my head mixed with Liz, which equals a regular head. Oh, he live does have big head. Yeah, but he, he measured in like the 30th percentile.

[A]

Nice.

[B]

I was probably at 97. Okay, so yeah, it's a good head. Take it back, take it back, take it back again.

[A]

Small head, crooked spine. Okay. Malachi Kennedy, crooked spine.

[B]

They do the tests, right?

[A]

You're right.

[B]

Tony Hawk, right about there. Big ramp, big gooey soft spot on the kid.

[A]

On what part of his. For the audio listeners, goal right here.

[B]

Right there.

[A]

Tony Hawk, he has a soft spot on his head.

[B]

Very big divot, like a crater. And I asked him, I go, I know, I think that's normal, but is that ever going to go away? He goes, oh, yeah, 100%. So babies can be born with four of them. They're typically gone by about the four month mark.

[A]

So you're saying that you, the doc, you went to the doctor to examine Malachi, he has a slope in his skull, big slope. And. And the doctor said it's normal, very.

[B]

Normal, and should go away.

[A]

Nice.

[B]

So my brain was working, doing backflips, and I go, now what if, Hypothetically, someone that's 26 years old still has that undeniable slope in their skull? He goes, oh, that's not right. And I go, okay, I want to ask a couple more questions. So let's say this baby ended up being a grown man. A beautiful, successful grown man. And I mean, you could just deactivate him at any given point. He goes, wait, it's still soft. I go, like a gummy bear. And he goes, okay, so you mean to tell me you have a friend that has a slope in his head at the age of 26? I go, oh, yes, sir. He goes, oh, yeah, that guy's probably severely underdeveloped, are his exact words. And I said, oh, my God, it all makes sense. You should have lost that when you were four months Old. And he said, at max. Worst case is two years of age. You kept that 24 extra years.

[A]

Wait, I'm underdeveloped.

[B]

You are underdeveloped like a son of a gun.

[A]

No, I am not.

[B]

Hey, ask the doctor.

[A]

No, because I went to school. I asked my grandma, the one that's dead of cancer, because she used to always rub my head, and she's German. Oh. She said, it's a German head.

[B]

Oh, that's not a.

[A]

That's not a German head.

[B]

That's just a head. That is a. Nothing to do with Germany.

[A]

I'm underdeveloped. You are.

[B]

You're missing some thoughts. You are. You're missing a couple. A couple common senses in there.

[A]

Do you see how evil you are?

[B]

No, that's a doctor. He went to school.

[A]

So you go to the doctor to examine your child, and the first thing you think of, say, saying, like, oh, let me take care of or concern about the health of my child. You're like, my dumb friend's got a little hook, too.

[B]

Hey, skateboard on the head. 26 year old. Good or not good? He goes, not good. You should send him. Send him to me. And I go, I'll do that.

[A]

Imagine me walking into a pediatrician all hairy.

[B]

You got your big ass clothes on, 2 XL. You look at the kid, you're like, what, bro?

[A]

I'm like this. Playing on the little things with them in the waiting room.

[B]

And it's like, you have this. You have this new love for him. They come out. They're like, peyton. All the little kids, you're like, doc, you, like, jump.

[A]

Bye, guys.

[B]

What. What would they do, though?

[A]

What.

[B]

What if you literally got on a chiropractor plan for them to rub your soft spot? They were just like, dude, okay, what.

[A]

If they did, like, try to, like, fix my head and molded me? I became, like, a genius.

[B]

That would scare me. That would absolutely scare me. Cause you're very. You're borderline, but you're very smart in your own things and very not in some others.

[A]

Oh, 100%.

[B]

And that's normal. That's fine. But now we understand why that back end is a slope. Pun intended.

[A]

I get it, dude. I'm. It's crazy that your son is going to the chiropractor already, because I've always seen chiropractor videos, and I've looked at my shape in the mirror, and I'm like, that bend shouldn't be there. Like, I shouldn't be sitting this way, right? But I'm. Oh, I Am terrified of the chiropractor, bro.

[B]

I've went one time now you're. It's one of those things you got to do, like, multiple. Multiple buy one at one time for just slight adjustment. It felt fantastic, dude.

[A]

Does it.

[B]

I just. I don't want to touch anything. Like, neck above.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

They can do this one, but they're not. They're not doing that Y strap. That's when the people like. And they're just like this. They're like, just breathe, Phil. Breathe, Phil. The guy's like, why do.

[A]

Why do I feel like I would be the one mistake? Like, I would go in and there would be on Fox 7 News, like, local podcasts are dead. Chiropractor. They couldn't fix them.

[B]

They go, new. There's new additions in the Peyton Hardin case. Footage has dropped. The guy's like, all right, you ready? And you go. I don't really know about. You're just like. You're just sitting there.

[A]

I know.

[B]

I'm in the back room. I'm like, oh, wait, are you. Bro pose. Are you okay?

[A]

You know, I would not die gracefully either.

[B]

God, no. You'd be a family guy character. Most people, if they got pulled in a Y strap and unfortunately passed, and it's like, you can just put them right in the coffin right there. You'd be like. You're just like this. I'd be like, oh, my God. You would. You would scar.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

Scar, though.

[A]

And I feel like all my hair on my body would go, like, flare out.

[B]

It just goes, like when you flick a dandelion or whatever, it's like.

[A]

And then I would, like, excrete a stench like a gas, like. And they'd be like, what the.

[B]

You know? I'm so sorry. You know how they say when you die, you lose? You lose. Howdy. How's it going?

[A]

You know.

[B]

You know how they say that you fart or poop whenever you die?

[A]

I'm so sorry, bro. I gotta change on shorts, bro. Like, oh, my God. Keep going. Why am I bleeding?

[B]

What is happening? You said. Oh, yeah, you need to cut your. You need to cut your nails.

[A]

No, they're fine.

[B]

You. No, you need to. Dude, you need to go to a cathedral. You need. You need. You need to pray and repent. Now you got a bloody suck.

[A]

Everybody relax.

[B]

Dude, hey, hey. Two breaths, okay?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know how people say. You know how you apparently fart or you poop right when you die?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because you lose all control of that sphinx. Yeah, you lose control.

[A]

I've lost control about four months ago.

[B]

I feel like I. I've never seen. I've never seen someone take their last breath in front of me.

[A]

Don't want to.

[B]

Or smelt afterwards.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I feel like in this scenario, a regular person would be like. And it'd be like, you would go. And it would be like, it would be so. And then you're dead. You go like this. You're like, you go. You go back, you. You come back to life to finish the fart.

[A]

And then you re.

[B]

Die. Yours would be so dramatic. Oh, my God.

[A]

And you know, like, some people, like, it's like, oh, this is a little D. But there's like a. It's like a tough last breath. Like, it'll be like, oh, no.

[B]

Think we can do this? This can't.

[A]

Dude. I would like, I would like, choke on my tongue.

[B]

You would be. You'd be the roughest death ever. Everyone else just kind of like, you're like. Then you go. And the doctor's like, what the man? Who is this guy? You're moving and you're throwing left hooks as you're dying. Oh, oh, oh. Oh, God.

[A]

How are we doing?

[B]

Instantly hot. Good morning to you.

[A]

How are we feeling? Okay. You should know. Podcast this episode is brought to you by Skims.

[B]

You know, Pete, when I normally get my underwear, it's either too tight after a dry or it doesn't hold well. Wrinkles. And it's not the most comfy.

[A]

I 100% understand you. But thank God we found skims. Because the thing I love about skims is I can wear it anywhere, everywhere for doing anything thing. And I never have a problem. Especially the big problem we have whenever we pull them drawers out the dryer and it rides up in you skims, it don't ride up in you. Makes me feel good and I look good in the mirror wearing them.

[B]

You're exactly right, Pete. And honestly, I want to talk about the stretch 5 inch boxer brief really quick.

[A]

I love those.

[B]

Oh, my God. I wear them to the gym and then I can wear them out of the gym and not feel like I'm in gym clothes all day long. Beautiful stretch, unbelievable comfort. And I can do whatever I need to in them.

[A]

Shop skims [e-mail] and skim stores. Let them know we sent you. After you place your order, select podcast in the survey and select our show in the drop down menu that follows. Skims is the official underwear partner of the NBA, WNBA and USA Basketball, which I think is really cool and I'm so honored to be a partner with skims. And I genuinely, genuinely, genuinely love the product. So shop skims today. We love you. Now on to the rest of the episode, the you should know podcast.

[B]

Woo.

[A]

Dude. Speaking of my health and me trying to prolong my life. God, this week I went on my first run in a long time.

[B]

You did?

[A]

Only me. Oh, that was really synchronous. Very synchronous. That makes me feel good. We have been practicing behind the scenes.

[B]

Literally.

[A]

I went on a run, right? And I used to be a college athlete. I used to be able to go. I had a huge motor on me. That was one of my things. I could go forever.

[B]

Go till you drop, dude.

[A]

I left the house, I started a jog down the street and I literally was like hands and knees. I was like, man. And the worst part is I don't understand how people can run in public. I don't understand the people that are street runners.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Because the whole time I'm running and I'm seeing Honda Civics and Ford F150s pass me. I'm looking at the look they're giving me and it's never like a way to be healthy. They're like, oh, yeah.

[B]

They're like, oh my God. They go, you need help?

[A]

Yeah, dude, it's.

[B]

You're sitting there, your hat's gone, your hair is crazy, like you're going down the sidewalk. You don't. You're not. Nothing graceful. Oh my God.

[A]

So demoralizing.

[B]

I could only, I could only imagine seeing you, now that you say that, I can only imagine seeing you on a sidewalk like at a very populated street.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because most people, first off, if you're a runner, put longer shorts on. You don't need your johnson to slip out. That's a weird fetish. And I'm ending it now. That dies right now on St. Patrick's Day, 2025, put on.

[A]

Oh, I had a fat moose knuckle when I was running too. My. I was in there and I just jumping. Brother was running with me.

[B]

He said, let's go, let's go.

[A]

Yeah, dude. And so I was running, right? And there's. I was going down this trail by my house and there was like a 50 year old woman. She was on pace with me, which is already like, I need to do better in my life.

[B]

Were you behind her? In front of her?

[A]

I was behind her.

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

And we're going. It's a, it's a trail. So everybody's going the same way.

[B]

She wasn't on pace with you, bro. She was on pace from you.

[A]

She was like, no, no, dead ass. She kept looking back at me. She kept going, and I don't know what to do in that situation. It's kind of like your story from last week, but at that point, like, you see, ma'am, that I am on the brink. Brink.

[B]

Brink.

[A]

I'm on the brink of brink.

[B]

No, th. Hold the tongue. Brink, brink, brink. Not brinketh.

[A]

I'm on the brink of my. There you go. I'm on the brink of my last breath. Oh, that's why it was so hard. So you know I'm not a threat, ma'am.

[B]

Oh, she doesn't, though.

[A]

She does it. And.

[B]

And the way you look, bro. I'm telling you.

[A]

Oh, she probably.

[B]

She had her darkest thoughts.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

She goes, never going to that trail again. Can't do that. There's a murderer behind me. It's like, oh, yeah.

[A]

And the crazy stuff happens to me. I got sprayed by a sprinkler in the ground. I was eating like city water for half a mile. It was terrible. I was getting chased by a squirrel on my run. Reminded me of Ruby. I swear to God. There's this little.

[B]

Little.

[A]

Little nasty little squirrel looking for walnuts and little treats. And he was following me the whole trip. And it made me feel like I had a running partner because I don't want to run with cj. Smells like labradoodle.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

But are you dead ass serious? Swear to God. Swear to God. There's this squirrel, and it reminded me of Ruby. And it would be like it was in a tree and it scattered out, and it was, like, doing the whole stand motion. It was like shadow boxing me. It was like. And I was like. And it. It was running with me the whole time.

[B]

You should have domesticated that son of.

[A]

A. I have a thing with squirrels. I told you that. Remember, like two years ago?

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

I got a thing with them, dude. I love me a good squirrel.

[B]

Why, dude?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

You should have tricked his ass. Hey, man, great run. He goes, you go, come here. You just grab him. You take him back, put a T shirt and a collar on him, and.

[A]

He'S just like, imagine the next time I go to your house, I just got a squirrel on a leash. I'm like, malachi, that'd be this.

[B]

That'd be the dopest. That's. That's your. That's your birthday present for next year.

[A]

Oh, you know, domesticated squirrel wouldn't have that live. Would not allow me to have a squirrel on a leash next to her son. That's just Liv. We're talking about.

[B]

We're talking about. It's half my house. We're talking about your house, too. Liv can sit this one out. A domesticated squirrel. You would make. You would make the greatest Instagram stories of all time if you had a domesticated squirrel.

[A]

I think they already did that in New York. Remember that couple that domesticated that squirrel? That's New York squirrel. And then the city murdered that mother New York squirrel. That.

[B]

That had Kryptonite, Anodite. It had vibranium. That is not a real squirrel.

[A]

No, but that score was lit. It was, like, viral on Twitter. And then the NYPD kicked down their door, and they said, give me your squirrel, and they killed the squirrel.

[B]

Yeah. That's so messed up.

[A]

So messed up.

[B]

Evil people.

[A]

It's like, wasn't there a whole movement? There was a whole. It was like BLM for squirrels. They were rioting the streets. It's a fault. We can keep it. I can say it.

[B]

I can't. But the fact. I'm sorry. And if for whatever reason, y'all see this, your squirrel was adorable. A whole movement behind the squirrel.

[A]

Oh, there's a lot of people that just need to attach themselves.

[B]

Oh, there is. That's so true. Justice for the squirrel. But don't you got to clock in?

[A]

Like, in my real life, I'm like, that is super sad. I'm not going to CVS picking out a sign and writing on it and marching for that.

[B]

No, I'm not going to go screen print a squirrel on a Hanes T shirt and then march through the city capital.

[A]

Dude, growing up, like, in Texas, like, especially in the part that I grew up in, I always saw, like, my view on animals getting, like, hurt. Like, those kind of squirrels, rabbits. It was always been kind of like, yeah, it sucks, but I'm so used to seeing it, you know? I mean, for the first time this week.

[B]

Oh, my God. You grew a heart.

[A]

I saw. I. I normally just see squirrels. Their afterlife. Or not squirrels, I normally just see. I normally just see rabbits. Their afterlife, like, on the pavement. I'm like, oh, that thing had a rough ending. I witnessed it happen in front of me.

[B]

Oh, my God, it changed.

[A]

It was a Toyota Tundra. And it. Oh, Cam.

[B]

When I say that rabbit never stood a chance.

[A]

No, Cam, it was like, it's. It was like the Joker. Now that might be too much. We'll mute it. We'll mute it for YouTube.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Cam it it. I genuinely pulled over and like, and sat in my sadness. It's. It's like that famous Blake Griffin tweet when he was like, I just ran over a squirrel. I feel awful. I can't imagine. No, I didn't say. Okay. Is that too much? I didn't say it.

[B]

I didn't know he tweeted that.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Blake Griffin's always tried to be a comic.

[A]

And we can mute that too. Sorry. CJ's giving me that look at death.

[B]

He is giving you that look at death, bro. In front. It's like on us like a side street or like the main road.

[A]

You're always on main road. Like by Target.

[B]

Oh, right there.

[A]

But I'm not gonna lie. That squirrel, brother. Busy street.

[B]

Very busy street.

[A]

I don't know. When they saw the window of opportunity to go.

[B]

That rabbit was drunk.

[A]

It's.

[B]

It licked some beer off the side of the road and it said, let's go for it. Just wham. Oh, God. Oh, man. Dude. No, it changes you. It'll. It'll absolutely change.

[A]

Yeah, I don't. I've never been hunting for that exact reason. I can't. I can't see myself doing any of that.

[B]

Not at all. I. Can I talk about that real quick?

[A]

Yeah, go ahead.

[B]

I don't understand modern hunters. Like, nowadays hunters.

[A]

Oh, we, we, we have talked about this and we had this debate.

[B]

I don't understand.

[A]

It's because, well, modern hunters, like, in what sense? Like, what are you hunting?

[B]

Like, I get something. Like it's a pastime and you want to go shoot things. But it's also like, why, why are you going to go kill the deer?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

People that live in Alaska and you.

[A]

Got to go eat it.

[B]

Whatever you can eat. But it's like, bro, like, go to Whole Foods 100%.

[A]

Go to Walmart 100%.

[B]

You don't see it. It's aftermath. It's like you're not sitting there. Like, they make whole. They make seasons out of it.

[A]

May God bless you. Don't do it again. Maybe they go and hunt and cook their own food because.

[B]

Sorry.

[A]

Maybe they go hunt and eat their. And make their own food because they have the same anxiety I do whenever I go through a drive thru.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

You know what I mean? Let me know if anybody feels this way about drive thrus. You ever gone to a drive, just opened my eyes. You ever gone through a drive thru? You're sitting there, you're at the window Right. You pay and you're sitting there for a little bit and a little longer and a little longer and then a little longer. And you keep looking in that window. There's no human being and you look behind you and there's 12 cars. The worst anxiety ever is when you're holding up the drive through and you can't do about it.

[B]

You sit there like trying, I'm trying, like, oh my God, I start to sweat.

[A]

And you know the people behind you in their car being like, you order the whole menu.

[B]

Would you order fat ass? Hey, they're out of apple pies. Dips in, dude.

[A]

Yeah, I went to McDonald's at like one in the morning and there was.

[B]

Horrible on a Saturday, horrible mistake.

[A]

And there was, I swear to God, 12 cars behind me. There was one drive through and 12 cars behind me. And the dude would not come back with my food. All I had is double quarter. There's ancestral behavior behind that one. That. That one had vitriol in it.

[B]

Dude.

[A]

Isn't that the worst anxiety ever?

[B]

No, that truly is top tier, dude. That is top. Like top top tier because you can't control it.

[A]

There's nothing you can do about it, dude.

[B]

I. I feel like if it was long enough to a point and you were in that afraid of a mindset, you would drive off camera without your food.

[A]

Cameron, I spent 14.99 on like a burger or something. I dead ass was creeping up. I kept creeping up. So the cars behind me knew that I'm ready to go to.

[B]

Yeah, you got to leave them like breadcrumbs and cues. You go, I swear to God, I did this the other day. We were a smoothie king and I'm like, bro, throw it in a blender. Hit blend. Give me my smoothie. You're not cooking nothing. There's no grill. Yeah, smoothie king, same. Taking forever. What the hell was that?

[A]

Floaty.

[B]

What?

[A]

He's a floaty.

[B]

I thought you. I thought you sucked though.

[A]

No, no, I blew.

[B]

I'm almost sure you suck.

[A]

No, I blew.

[B]

You went.

[A]

No, if I sucked in.

[B]

If you studio dust there, I'd be like, you gotta go home. But I'm in the smoothie king in the same. I'm leaving cues, right? I'm sitting there like this. I do one of these. I go. I throw the arm up and then I roll down the window.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I start act. There's no one in this window. The cars behind me can't see. I. Yes or no, Did I kind of fake speak to the window as if the person was there to give them insight of. I'm being impatient too. And I'm not trying to hold up your knife.

[A]

You know, people can see if that window opens up and if, like, there. Normally there's an arm or something that comes out of it.

[B]

No, but I was in my mindset, in my little dilemma. I was like, I'm gonna pretend that they're. They asked me a question like this. So I gave him that back. I literally went. I went, okay.

[A]

But you know what? They're probably thinking, like, oh, this guy's being difficult. He's making them go back. Yeah.

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

You don't have enough anxiety to play out every scenario that's possible on earth. That's. That's a benefit of my superpower.

[B]

Oh, my God. I just. Can I tell story time? I just ask permission because, like, you.

[A]

Think on the podcast, I'll be like, no. Like. Like, that's our job.

[B]

It's a great.

[A]

Like, I'll be like, hey, not today.

[B]

Next you go, hold it. Story time. I was, oh, my God. You brought up cars.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You brought drive through. Drive throughs require cars.

[A]

Are we shooting the same episode?

[B]

Drive throughs require cars is what I meant. Is what I meant. You didn't bring your cars. Yeah. Oh, my Fiesta. You did. He said Toyota Tundra. You said Toyota Tundra. My ADHD ran with it. We went from rabbits to anxiety drive throughs, and now we're here.

[A]

I hate people that walk through drive throughs. Who do you think you are?

[B]

I think they banned it or not banned it, but they allow it.

[A]

It's like, who. Who do you think you are?

[B]

I've been there, though.

[A]

Why you use your Lamborghinis?

[B]

I had to lamb fetis because we went in one group in one car. There's, like, the chain. There's, like, three restaurants. I said, I don't want what y'all are eating, and I'm not gonna settle. So I went to the other place, but inside was closed. I said, hey, bro, I'm on feet and I want your food.

[A]

Did they serve you? No good?

[B]

Yeah, they said, no, fat ass. They said, hey, you're not getting it. Your toes are gross. I went, aww.

[A]

Okay, tell me your story.

[B]

Tell me why I pull into a gas station the other day. I'm in my car, and my. It's very important that you know this. My phone is connected to my car via CarPlay. Okay. Remember that. I pull into the gas station. Another anxiety. Not really anxiety moment, but something that pisses you off more than anything. When you pull into the gas station, you can't see the pumps, but you see an open stall, you finally turn yellow, bag of caution, out of service.

[A]

Oh, my God, it sucks.

[B]

Pisses you off. Worst ever. Now you gotta readjust.

[A]

Or they just have one little cone there.

[B]

I'll run that. I pull, I see it, and I go, oh, my God. Right? I'm just complaining by myself. No one else is in the car. I'm literally complaining about gas pumps. Whatever. I'm saying, whatever. I readjust. I'm gonna say this and then backtrack, complaining about the gas pumps. I readjust, park open, start pumping gas. I come back in my car. I'm on the phone with the police department. I swear to God, I'm not kidding. And I said, hel. And they're like, nine, one one, what's your emergency? And I said, oh, no. I said, no, no, no. It's just out of service pump. So how this happened? The new update, Apple Intelligence. Right. I don't know what I said. I don't know what sounded like emergency caution, maybe. I said, the caution tape some. I, I, you not. I park the car, I go out and I come back and it's quiet because I turned my car off because it was loud. That's why I said carplay.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So when I turn the car off, it's now just through, like, speaker.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I literally start to pump gas. I come to sit in the seat, and I hear an officer in my car. And I go, what the hell is happening? And I literally go, hello? First don't even know I'm on the phone.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Don't even know who it is.

[A]

And I.

[B]

You don't think it's law enforcement?

[A]

Yeah, that's the last word. Hello?

[B]

They go, this is 91 1. And I'm like, what are you like, what do you mean? This is 91 1? And they're like, you called, sir? Is there an emergency?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I was like, I don't really think so. I was like, I don't know.

[A]

If you start going.

[B]

I don't know if this is like, divine intervention. I'm like, it's something about to happen. And then they literally go, don't let that happen again. They tell me, don't let it happen again. Because I told them.

[A]

What neighborhood were you in?

[B]

I was in mine. Like, outside of mine.

[A]

Oh, okay. That's different if you're in a city. Okay. Because normally when you accidentally call 911, they're showing up regardless.

[B]

Yeah. But That's. But that's. I don't. I still like. I still don't know how it happened. I don't know what I said. For Apple Intelligence to think I was.

[A]

In danger, dude, that is absolutely bullshit.

[B]

It was bull. Eventually laughed like 30 minutes afterwards. I was like, I was low key up. I was driving. I was like, that is like not okay.

[A]

You just see 18 black SUVs. Like, fuck.

[B]

I'm like, no, it, bro. I was. I was for real. Like, what the hell just happened?

[A]

Dude, that is an insane butt dial. That's the worst butt dial of all time.

[B]

I phone wasn't near my body. It was AI. Apple Intelligence robots are plotting my demise.

[A]

Yeah, y. You're becoming a real dad, brother.

[B]

Real 40 year old.

[A]

You definitely did something. It.

[B]

Seriously, what? It. It was in my cup holder. That's where I put it, dude.

[A]

That it.

[B]

So I don't touch it. But I still. Everything's on, bro.

[A]

It was stupid. It was crazy being like a former serial 911 dialer. Like I like, I used to do that for sport, you know what I mean? Like, that was my game.

[B]

You just going for quick dial. You go PR pr.

[A]

Oh yeah. My mom would be like, peyton, get the house on order. The pizza cops are coming. You know what I mean? Like, that was our Friday night. Like, I had to learn. I had to learn. I had to figure out what it was. The you should know podcast this episode is brought to you by Open Phone. If you're running a business, you know that every time you miss a call, you're leaving money on the table. And as business owners, we do not want that. When every customer conversation matters, you need a phone system that keeps up and helps you you stay connected. That's why you need Open Phone.

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

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[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

I know. I always used to want to bathe in the gas pump gasoline.

[B]

What the. No, no, no.

[A]

Because I swear to God, I might have said this before. I don't know. We've been doing this. Hey, happy three years anniversary, kind of. By the way, it's like the. The amount of episodes accumulated to three years of episodes. There you go. That's the best way to say it. But I used to want to bathe in the gas pump gasoline. You shouldn't do that.

[B]

But ever.

[A]

I remember because it was one of the first times I got. I was in a hotel room with my mom. Now let me get there.

[B]

Oh, my God. I don't think you should tell.

[A]

No, no. I was a kid.

[B]

This sounds like Dexter, bro. This sounds like a something off of CSI New Orleans. Like bathing in gasoline with your mom. This is not good. It's not good.

[A]

Now, let me explain it. It was like a Hilton Inn. It was a Hilton Inn or something like that, and I don't care. It was like those two queen beds, right? I was on the left one. My mom was on the right one.

[B]

Okay, okay.

[A]

Separated. But my mom had on, like.

[B]

What is happening?

[A]

What is happening? Y'all? Let me land, dog. If y'all keep interrupting, it's gonna be bad, bro.

[B]

Let you land. You took off with. You jumped with no parachute. What do you mean, let you land?

[A]

No, no.

[B]

Yes, you. Yeah. Let's try our hardest to let all of this come out.

[A]

My mom had on MTV on the tv. Oh, my God.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

He freaks. Where the freak? And so she was. It was like the music videos, and it was like 2005 or something.

[B]

Okay, okay, okay.

[A]

And so back then, like, I was like, this is sick. And I remember there was a lovely ebony queen.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

And like, short, like. Like jean shorts. And she was at a gas pump. And I remember. I don't remember what the scene was, but she was holding the gas pump, and she was spraying it on herself. And, like, spraying the camera. God worked on. And so I remember I was like, I want to try the gas on me. And then I told my mom, I want to try that. She goes, don't do it. She goes, if somebody ever tries to take you out of gas pump, you spray it on them. Life lessons. Mama harden.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Now, now, next time, y'all let me finish the whole story.

[B]

Holy. That could be in the hall of fame of, like, what's it called? Cliffhangers. That.

[A]

That's not. Sounded absolutely terrible.

[B]

That was incredible, though.

[A]

And I know my mom's at home watching this right now. Like, this.

[B]

Yeah. She's like, boy, I'll beat you. Yeah, that happened. Oh, my God.

[A]

Yeah. Do you ever think of, like, the secondhand embarrassment we bring our families?

[B]

Oh, my God. Oh, yeah. And my mom heard soft heart.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

I've called her Dahmer for the World Wide Web.

[A]

Sometimes I'm sitting in bed at night, like, 1am on a Friday. I'm laying down.

[B]

It's not true. That's not true.

[A]

4Am on a Friday.

[B]

Sometimes 4am I'm spinning on the bed.

[A]

So I'll be sitting there just looking at the ceiling, and I'm replaying all the things I said on this week's episode. And then I'm like, dude, these are real people.

[B]

Yeah. Like, we need to give them warning.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, no. 100%. I. I often do warn my mom, actually, because she's so sensitive.

[A]

She's so. I do. That's my family. They're just like me.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, they're weird. They. They. They. Dark humor.

[B]

They'll take it. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Not well. Well, I didn't mean it like that. Dude, he need. You need a drink or something. Like, you are not. You're not yourself right now. You need, like, five jump jacks. No, it's great. It's great. But you are. Your brain is. See that? You just. Out of nowhere, you gotta. I love it, though.

[A]

Yeah. So sometimes I think. And then I think about who I really think about is CJ's family. Because I known CJ's family for, like, a little while now. Like, we haven't spent too much time together, but I feel like they know my heart.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So sometimes I'm like, this the wrong way. Like, I. I'm just. I'm just. Biden.

[B]

Oh, my God. Dude. But it's always fun just making fun of cj, though. It's a weird, strange pastime. I love it.

[A]

It's the easiest.

[B]

I love it.

[A]

And it's. It's because. We'll talk about this more on Patreon, but it's the way he carries himself. It makes it so much easier. It makes it so much easier.

[B]

That's how. That's how I feel with y'all when you gang up on me.

[A]

What do you mean?

[B]

Y'all love making fun of me. Look at him. Y'all love making fun.

[A]

Okay, but this was the thing. There was. You're. You're making fun of was like a roller coaster. It was like. It was so fun. It was so fun. Then we had this drop, and it was just like. Because I saw. Start to affect your daily. I said, oh, like, you'd get in the mirror and you'd be like, oh.

[B]

You might be kidding. But I wasn't. I'm sitting there.

[A]

No. But speaking of people taking our podcast jokes too far. Right? Cam always makes jokes about, like, me being Big Bang Hank or whatever. Like, he always makes these jokes.

[B]

Yeah. Jokes.

[A]

And a lot of his jokes. A lot of people are starting to take it seriously.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I got the wildest tweet this week.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Tweeted me. I don't even know if they're a fan.

[B]

It's just a person.

[A]

It's a person now. It was their birthday, right? It was this person's birthday.

[B]

Oh, God.

[A]

This is the list of names this person tagged me with. And let me ask y'all if this makes sense at all.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Right. This person tweeted their PayPal link.

[B]

Horrible start.

[A]

And they go, help me make my birthday special. This. These are the people they tagged me with. Elon musk.

[B]

Okay. No.

[A]

Mr. Beast. Real Donald Trump, the Vice President, the White House. Google. Kim Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian, and then Peyton.

[B]

What in the hell?

[A]

Where do I fit into any of.

[B]

Where is there a single string of connection?

[A]

They're like. They're like, oh, I really want somebody to donate for my birthday. Let me think of all the billionaires and Peyton.

[B]

Yeah. Like, Peyton. And then literally the most expensive, maybe a $20 bill from Peyton and Elon. What can you do about a rocket? Can you take me to Mars?

[A]

Exactly. Like, that was the wildest.

[B]

J.D. vance in there. Why is he in there? Can we. You might be. He might be more of an outlier than you for being honest.

[A]

Like, no, he definitely has more money than me.

[B]

I didn't say that. But he might be a bigger outlier than you. You are at least Internet personality. So, like, very known. It's like, why is JD Vance.

[A]

It wasn't at jd. It was at vp. So it's just that reoccurring Twitter, they tagged the White House. Like, do you think, like, the home's gonna be like.

[B]

If it drops a painting? It's like, sell that.

[A]

Happy birthday. I mean, last time you're at the White House January 6th. You found the safe, right? You know where it's at in there. You get me? Cam is so excited about our DC show this summer. He's like, I can do it again.

[B]

I'm not gonna lie. For this. This year's DC Show.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

We need to.

[A]

You're going to wear the horns again. You're painting your face. You're pulling out the jorts.

[B]

Rush the tower. Go. Flank left. Side. Troop Alpha, now.

[A]

People got hurt. Yeah, it's not good.

[B]

It was a really bad day for our country. Yeah, all jokes. But this year on the DC show, we have to be better. We, okay? We, as a collective, suck. As tourists, we absolutely suck.

[A]

And everybody just looked at me. Everybody just looked at me.

[B]

You wanna know the reason why this guy?

[A]

How?

[B]

I'm in a new place? You know what I want? I wanna scratch my ass and order some pizza. That's all you care about. How many times did we eat pizza? We ate pizza in New York. We ate pizza in la. It's pizza. Let's get something else. I can get pizza down the block from Marco.

[A]

Bro, pizza is the most dynamic food of all time. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Hungover, sober, high. Anything you want, bro. Pizza is. Is. Call me a ninja turtle. Careful, Caesar, don't say that too fast. Pizza is. Is. Is. Is. Is the top echelon of food. Cameron, you can eat that anytime, any place, anywhere.

[B]

By the time we were done with tour, if we all went to a lab and took a sh. T, It'd be a nice little tenderloin of steak coming out with pepperonis on it. All we had was steak and pizza, and that's not bad. Not a bad life.

[A]

Yeah, y'all are.

[B]

So where's the salad? Where's the cheese boy?

[A]

Sam hasn't eaten a salad since surgery. Are you kidding me? Who are we pretending to be? I've seen you at the hotel breakfast. You're. You're cleaning house.

[B]

Hotel breakfast and cleaning. Dude, if you ever put me in a buffet, they've lost the people.

[A]

Like the. The people. The hosts in the lobby. Every time Cam wakes up in the morning, get more Cam brings to go plates.

[B]

No, I've definitely taken. I've definitely taken plates.

[A]

Oh, to the room.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh. 100.

[B]

100.

[A]

I used to have to do that for AU tournaments for my mom. She was not going down there. She was like, bring me up. It's me.

[B]

She's like, nasty. Get them eggs. A little bit of pepper.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

No. I'm kidding. Our food. I'm completely kidding. About this food. I love pizza. I'll eat a 10 out of 10. But as a tourist, I don't think anyone's worse than him.

[A]

Are we, we. How many times are we bringing this up? I don't want to see the pyramids. I don't want to go see the Eiffel Tower. I don't want to see the Twin Towers. I don't want to see anything.

[B]

That's everything out of country. There's a lot of things that has to be done to get to those. I'm talking, we got a show in dc. Let's go see the cool DC stuff. You go. Don't care.

[A]

We drove past it. Drove the way to the hotel, drove past. Yes, there it is.

[B]

Thrilling. Is that.

[A]

What's the difference?

[B]

Looking out of a RAV4 going, what's.

[A]

The difference between driving past and walking up to it?

[B]

You walk up to, you get to touch it. Say, I was there. You know how many movies that I was there? That's my fingerprint. I have been there. I have seen the White House. I've touched Abraham Lincoln's toe. That's what you get to say.

[A]

Okay, so. So that's like saying for our famous friends, like, we go see Kai. It's like, you can't just go, hey, what's up, Kai? And he goes, what's up, Cam? You got to go like, oh, Kai, movies he's been in.

[B]

Like, that's a person. That. That's a person. That is a person. Living thing.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Monuments, structures. That's like, in Chicago, it's the bean. Not.

[A]

We didn't go.

[B]

I didn't care about the beans.

[A]

I wanted to flick it.

[B]

I walk up just like, oh, we're getting there. But we got to be better. We got to be better.

[A]

You should know. Podcast this episode is brought to you by Friends at Turtle Beach. Remember that feeling of booting up your favorite game for the first time? I know you remember. Oh, my God, that late night session. The epic wins. The sound of the lobby filling up with your friends. I still love it to this day. Gaming wasn't just something you did. It was a whole experience. And the right headset made all the difference.

[B]

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[A]

Head to turtlebeach.com. use code YSK for 10% off your entire order. That's 10% off your [e-mail] with promo code YSK. And after you purchase, we'll ask you where you heard about them. And please, please, please support our show and tell them that we sent you. You love us, I love you, we love each other, and we love Turtle Beach. Get the ultimate immersive gaming experience with Turtle beach today. Now, on to the rest of the episode. One thing I'm also bad at, and it's one of the things I wish I could change about myself. I genuinely. It definitely brings me a little less confidence. We all know this about me. It's polar opposite from you. I am not a foodie at all.

[B]

Oh, my God, you're not. Yeah, bro. You need bro. Yes.

[A]

It's to the point, like, you know when people post pictures of their plate on their Instagram story? Like, I've seen you, like, drool. I see C.J. do that. Like, I like. I've seen it. Like, people get so, like, bro, that. That. That platter looks good. That's a good spread. Never once have I seen somebody's dinner picture and been hungry or been like, they did that. I'm always a little grossed out.

[B]

That makes no sense at all. I don't know what it is. All you see good food and you get grossed out or you're not hungry.

[A]

It literally. Food. The visual of food turns me off.

[B]

Do you need to, like, you get a screening done?

[A]

No, no.

[B]

You might. That might be something, bro.

[A]

But why do you think that is?

[B]

I have no clue how your brain works. Genuinely. It is a scary vessel of thoughts and actions that happen whenever they want to. And I don't understand it. But with food, yeah, that just doesn't make sense. There's no. There's no even rationalizing this.

[A]

But some people are like, their whole goal in Life like they, they save money in life to go tour the world and go, go to Saint Tropez and try the fish filet. That like, I don't. That doesn't sound good to me.

[B]

See, because you, you are, you are a simple man.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

That is stuck in your ways. Is that wrong? No. But the fact you said you're willing and want to change, that's improvement.

[A]

I don't understand why I'm looked down on. I like what I like and that should be okay.

[B]

Like, people are like, if it worked like that.

[A]

Yeah, you know what I mean? Like, oh, I saved it. That would have been too far. Ad Free Uncensored at Free Uncensored Patreon, we'll talk about it. But like, people look down on me because if I go somewhere, I want a steak, I want chicken nuggets, I want chicken strips. I genuinely, I talked to a girl one time and I was, I was on FaceTime with her and she goes, where you at? And I was like, I'm in the Chick Fil a drive thru. She goes, what'd you get? And I go, the chicken nuggies. And she goes. And I go, something funny?

[B]

Yeah. You go, huh?

[A]

She goes, you're such a grown man child. And I go, for the nuggets at Chick Fil A. She goes, yeah. Like, I go, what am I supposed to get? She goes, a sandwich. It like I get looked down on because I like what I like. Like, I don't.

[B]

You're getting upset.

[A]

Bro, because it's everywhere I go. People always say something about me.

[B]

What do you. Okay, what do you think actually makes people at our age? We'll call, we'll give a three year gap. 20, 24, 25, 26. What. What do people do at that age that does make them childish? What are things that you don't like in a 24, 25, 26 year old?

[A]

Oh my God.

[B]

That's like, could be like it. There's not even could be seen as it is. Like, you are acting like a child. You are immature.

[A]

I have a different mindset on it though.

[B]

Let's hear it.

[A]

That's.

[B]

Oh, you always have a different mindset. Don't worry.

[A]

I don't think you can be. I don't think there's anything that's childish. I generally don't. I think it's people having fun and the people that are stuck in being in the, in the. I wear a suit every day. You know what I mean?

[B]

I don't want to be a corporate baddie. I Don't want to be a corporate baddie.

[A]

Like, honestly, like if you're 26 and you, you're sitting down on Saturday mornings. Crisscross apple cider sauce, crisscross applesauce with some Cheerios. Watching Blue's Clues. We're calling Chris Hansen.

[B]

There you go.

[A]

Now that's. That's different than childish. You're really getting a pizza after that. You know what I mean? I don't believe in being childish. I don't think it exists. I think it's people having fun. Like me. I'm 26. I think I have a good life.

[B]

You do?

[A]

I watch High School Musical every weekend.

[B]

See, now that is one of the things I would immediately flag. I would absolutely flag that and put it in your phone pile. Why the are you continuing to watch Troy Bolton week after week?

[A]

Because it makes me happy.

[B]

62 weeks in a row, it makes me happy. Okay, but when. Dude, I can't say that, but mute it for this one. When people do and it makes them happy, you don't enable it. Yeah, but keep going, Keep going.

[A]

High School Musical doesn't make me go.

[B]

Doesn't make you chippy chappy dude a mad bro.

[A]

High school. The day the door is closed. The echoes fill your soul. You don't know which way to go. Just trust your heart voices it. I could go crazy cuz that. Did you listen to what I just said?

[B]

Now, okay, that is, that is motivation. But this is, this is where I'm going to get you. If you say, say you never do. Cuz you don't actually love me. But say you popped into my house, right? Without warning, without nothing. I see a doorbell notification, you know the code. You walk right in. If you walked in and I'm shirtless, pretty white throw.

[A]

I'm like, hey, get off if I'm.

[B]

Sitting on my couch. Yeah, not with my son so important. My son is not in there. He's with his mom. But I'm saying I'm on my couch, shirtless, eating a PB and J, indulging in Yu Gi. Oh, you. You would call me an array of names. You would take video and photographic evidence, right? And then you'd leave. But if I come in and you're watching High School Musical, it's shut up, bitch. Sharpe's talking. And that's. And that's the difference. That's what I'm saying. For you it's cool. For me it's lame as hell. So explain that. Why do I get the short end of the stick?

[A]

Because you try to play both sides of the fence. You try to be like, all I care about is LeBron basketball and Lil Durk. Like, that's. That's all. That's all you try to convey to the public. I'm like, I will put makeup on right now in a thong.

[B]

Oh. Oh, my God. Oh, my. Oh, my God. Imagine a guy, you have a thong drawer for you. For whatever weird reason. Say it's a. Say it's a stream.

[A]

Whatever you ritual, whatever you're into.

[B]

Exactly. But say some poor. He breaks into that third floor balcony. He goes in there. He's a real creep. OG Creep from back in the days. He's going through the drawers, he sees thongs. He goes. And then he goes. He goes, God, girl. Oh, my God. He goes, oh, you smell like a box out. You smell like goddamn pick and roll.

[A]

It smells like an amoeba. Definitely knows a horn set.

[B]

That Jack Danielson.

[A]

Holy.

[B]

And then you. And then at the same time, you're walking up the stairs, you're butt naked. You got makeup on. You go, hey. He just goes, oh, come on. You go. Get out of here.

[A]

Yo, Pierce. Pierce came to my house. First of all, I'm changing the code on my door. He's just be walking in too much.

[B]

Yeah, you gotta like. Like, I'm not gonna lie. Someone needs to know you are on the way.

[A]

Pierce will just walk into my house, like, out of nowhere, and then he'll. I'll be on the third floor in my room. I'll just hear boots coming up the stairs. Literally. I was. He just. I was like. It was before we went to Kane Brown's concert this weekend. And I was in the bathroom doing my hair. I was shirtless. I. I look over to my right, I just see Pierce like this. I see. You know how frightening that is? Pierce Lisner in your peripheral. And he has his sunglasses inside prescribed. He can see clear as. You know how terrifying that is.

[B]

Oh, my God. Oh, you said that right when I'm swallowing. Oh, my God, bro. You're sitting there, who's calling my phone?

[A]

Who's calling it?

[B]

There's like. He's just sitting there looking at. Like that with sunglasses.

[A]

Hey, Pete. I'm like, what guys?

[B]

They just go, whoa. Or he said they're eating better. He's like. He's hitting one of his things.

[A]

Only Patreon people know that. Oh, dude.

[B]

Oh, my God, stop.

[A]

No, I just didn't want that part on it.

[B]

What does that mean?

[A]

Okay, what?

[B]

You're actually leaving today with like, battle wounds?

[A]

Dude, I'm bleeding. I just bruised my hand. I'm going through it over here. You don't want to back up? Oh, no, it's okay. It's. I'm stained now, but I saw the wildest thing ever.

[B]

Now, I don't know if that's true.

[A]

I bet you didn't know this. Did you know you can buy a house on Amazon?

[B]

What?

[A]

You can literally Google right now. House for sale, Amazon. And there's two story houses for like $69,000.

[B]

No, there's not.

[A]

Cam.

[B]

Was it made out of fence? How's it 69K?

[A]

Look, look, look. I just googled buy a house on Amazon, Amazon.com. tell me those aren't homes.

[B]

Okay, those are. They're shipping container homes.

[A]

Cam.

[B]

How's this one? $12,000. What are there a big bad wolf and come down, blow it. This one's six and a half grand. No levels, no portable, prefabricated, livable home, I hope.

[A]

Yeah, and they got bathrooms in them and everything. This one's two story. Kim, first of all, imagine buying a house on Amazon.

[B]

Yeah, wicked.

[A]

What practicality is that?

[B]

Imagine the poor, it's piece by piece, delivering your crib. No, like 100, like four or five, 700 boxes.

[A]

It's like. It's like, yeah, imagine you're. You're in your house. Why are you ordering a house? Where are you getting it shipped to?

[B]

Yeah, right. What the hell are you ordering from the street? What are you doing? You're like, God, I don't even want Taco Bell. I want a crib. Can you just get a house?

[A]

They're like. He's like, it's like, babe, I'm ordering something on Amazon. What do you want? She's like, a house.

[B]

She goes, I need more, Terry. I need more space.

[A]

She's like, I ordered a desk on Amazon and It came in 50 pieces and it took me a week to put it together. Who's building the house? Who's what?

[B]

It's like adult Legos. It's literally just like that. Be, bro, we need to.

[A]

I'm not buying an Amazon house, Cam.

[B]

Patreon video.

[A]

I'm not spending 70 grand on a house.

[B]

No, let's get the 6000$1.

[A]

No, but that's not the full experience. I want the one with the, with the chimney in the.

[B]

With a balcony. Yeah, dude.

[A]

I'm like, the practicality of that. They're like, hey, what's delivering it? I've seen the Amazon trucks.

[B]

Yeah, it's not fitting on those stupid Little gray aerodynamic vans. They have to bring a double wide dually, like a 36 wheeler. That, with that. Oh. Oh, my God. Dude, there's nothing that makes me punch my steering wheel quicker than being caught behind a big ass thing that's carrying a piece of like a wind turbine says, oversized load.

[A]

I like it.

[B]

Big haul.

[A]

I feel like I'm in fast and furious.

[B]

I feel like I'm staring at a fat ass for like 50 miles and I, I can't get past it. Oh my God. I don't like it.

[A]

I'm still on this house though. I'm still in this house.

[B]

Yeah, the house.

[A]

Okay, first of all, what are the rules when you buy this house? Like, you know what I mean? Yeah.

[B]

You can't just click add card buy. There's no way. No way.

[A]

It's like, are we making down payments on Amazon, bro? Are we paying HOA fees on Amazon?

[B]

And do I call if I got a leak? Like, what's going on?

[A]

And where are you putting the say, you know, say right now? I bought a two story house on Amazon. Where am I putting it? Do I just go like, hey, I just put it next somebody's house. I'm like, new neighbor.

[B]

Yeah, you go, hey, don't go in there, bro.

[A]

That's mine.

[B]

That's my crib. That's not yours because it's in my lawn. I don't care. Like, you have, you have to have like clearance or there has to be.

[A]

Yeah, you're your own plumber. I'm telling you, it is Amazon. I hate building stuff from Amazon. So I stopped buying stuff on there. Like I took me. I had to get CJ's help for a nightstand. And the nightstand on Amazon looked like it was the size of this building. I come in. It's like for toddlers, dude. So I'm a grown man with a toddler nightstand. And as little LED lights in, and I'm like, I'm 26 nightstands. Nice. Imagine a house on Amazon. Yeah.

[B]

Do I have to have a welding permit? Like, how am I putting it together? It's not click clack screwdriver. It's like, this is a home.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

No, there's no way I would do. We need to do that. We need to test the theory.

[A]

And every time I buy something on Amazon, whether it's a microphone, a camera, it's guaranteed to go to the wrong house. It's my luck on Amazon. Imagine they accidentally bring you a house.

[B]

It goes, someone has a blank doorbell. It's like new delivery. They Open it. The house is right there. There's like, what the. You're on the inside. Hey, can you keep it down?

[A]

Yeah, it's like, I live here now. Dude, I saw that and it genuinely like blew my mind.

[B]

That has to be impossible. There's no way that's real.

[A]

I swear to God.

[B]

Like Apache helicopters just drop it down. They're like over the intercom. They're like, where do you need your house? And just like little to left, a little this way. Like here go. They just go. And they just have a crib. Yeah, that's.

[A]

It's.

[B]

We have to test that or like at least research it.

[A]

I mean, there's no way you can.

[B]

Just put in the cart and click buy like.

[A]

There's no test it right now.

[B]

That's impossible.

[A]

All right, Here we go.

[B]

70 bands.

[A]

So there's this. There's this two story house for $65,000 on Amazon. I'm about to see. What if I around and actually buy this on accident.

[B]

We'd be so lit. We sold it.

[A]

Who's reimbursing me?

[B]

I'd go in with you. I'd go in with you. Oh, my gosh.

[A]

There's free delivery options for a house? Yeah, it says so right now. We're recording this on March 11th. The soonest it can get to us is April 10th.

[B]

One month. Imagine that. Prime.

[A]

First of all, first of all, first of all. Oh, there is quantities. I can buy 15 houses right now on Amazon. Are you me?

[B]

You can make your own elitist little island.

[A]

All right. But add to cart. Yeah, let me get a house and like a thermodynam. Like, what am I? All right, bye now.

[B]

You better calm down with those little clicky claps your thumbs.

[A]

I'm in by now. Let's see what happens.

[B]

There's no way. Is it just going.

[A]

It's taking so long to load. It's like, are you sure this is a house? I'm not signed in, so I'm good. So I'mma hit. How many do you want? One or eleven?

[B]

Let's get four.

[A]

Okay. Buy now.

[B]

One for me, one for cj.

[A]

Oh my God. It's literally saying to sign in.

[B]

No, you can't.

[A]

You can't.

[B]

We can't even test it. Imagine. Imagine how quick.

[A]

Why is Chase texting me? Oh, my God. No, no. Dead ass. I think I just bought that.

[B]

No, you did not.

[A]

It's a Chase fraud. Imagine. Imagine.

[B]

Oh my God.

[A]

If I just accidentally spent 70 bands. I am Pierce. Pierce is the first to go I am a.

[B]

You start. You start tearing up. You're just overwhelmed. And like Pierce tries to hug you, bro. He's just.

[A]

The you should know podcast. This episode is brought to you by Zakdak.

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

All right, P. In honor of St. Patrick's Day, I wanted to bring something up to your attention. Read a couple things. I think it's hilarious. And then I got something else for you. Okay, so first I just want to read you a couple things about St. Patrick's Day.

[A]

Oh. Your family's heritage.

[B]

See now you'd think that, right?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

I'm starting to think St. Patrick's Day is a fraud.

[A]

Is this offensive to your community? I don't think it's your community.

[B]

I'm just reading facts.

[A]

Okay, okay.

[B]

Let's start with the fact that his name wasn't Patrick. His name wasn't Patrick. St. Patrick was born meowing socket to his Christian parents in Roman Britain. You wanna know another thing? Wasn't born in Ireland. He was British. So what are we doing with this holiday? St. Patrick's Day? Celebrating Irish culture.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Wasn't Patrick.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Don't even know if he was a saint. I don't know what the guy did in his free time. And he wasn't from Ireland. Let's just start there.

[A]

This is the first time Learning anything about St Patrick's Day, by the way. I've never known what it is.

[B]

Okay. It's a holiday. To St Patrick's Day. Irish culture. To America. Celebrating the Irish.

[A]

Oh, Shout out to the Irish.

[B]

Love the Irish. I'm just. I just learned this as well.

[A]

Look at the Irish. Great Disney movie.

[B]

Fantastic movie. So now if you had to guess what a lady leprechaun's name would be.

[A]

Like a. Like a name or a leprechaun?

[B]

No, let's go.

[A]

Like a.

[B]

Like a. Like a leprechaun. But that's wrong.

[A]

Okay. A male is a leprechaun.

[B]

And female. Male is leprechaun. As female is.

[A]

That sounds like an evil, like, transformer.

[B]

Yeah, it does. Okay. Male is the leprechaun.

[A]

Female is to leprechaun.

[B]

All answers are wrong. There's no such thing as female leprechaun.

[A]

That's not progressive.

[B]

That's not right. Then that's not included. They don't get any dei. Next thing. Ready?

[A]

Yep.

[B]

You ready for this? What are leprechauns? To the best of your knowledge? Right. The creepy little. The bowl. The bowls of gold at the end of the rainbow. Yeah. What are they? Trolls. Okay.

[A]

Clothes that protect their pot of gold at the end of a rainbow.

[B]

Very close.

[A]

Right.

[B]

If you would have said they're fairies. A leprechaun's a fairy. I'm starting to think this whole thing's made up. Nothing's making sense. That little ginger guy with the sharp teeth that loves money. He is not a fairy. He is absolutely a troll. Like you said. He's not a fairy.

[A]

Yeah. His. His. Like. I. I don't want to say anything. I don't know if leprechauns are, like, a cultural, like, standard.

[B]

I don't think they're a deity. I just think it's a leprechaun. Leprechaun is iconic image associated with St. Patrick's Day. But leprechauns are believed to have originated from the Celtic belief in fairies. So the leprechauns aren't leprechauns. Patrick's name is Tony. He was born in London, and they were celebrating the Irish. What the. What is going on with this? It's all.

[A]

And what do we do to celebrate St. Patrick's Day? Do we have work off?

[B]

I'm glad that you brought that up.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I have something for you if you'd like to close your eyes. Close your beautiful, cute little eyes. I got me a little St. Patrick. Oh, maybe I should talk like London because it's not Irish.

[A]

Okay, you ready? Yeah. Okay.

[B]

Close your eyes. Here we go.

[A]

Don't touch.

[B]

I'm not gonna touch.

[A]

Oh, what is that?

[B]

Just give me your hands.

[A]

Loosely, like chains.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Well, you're not gonna like how tight they are either. Here we go. That's your first gift. Open your eyes. You have a sporting necklace.

[A]

This is gonna help my problems.

[B]

Now I don't have to go out and buy them. I can just pour it right from my home.

[A]

Come on.

[B]

So that's the first thing you wear. You wear green and gold. That's why you're getting pinched again.

[A]

Nice. Okay, well, I got green on now, so you can't pay.

[B]

Just one pinch poke.

[A]

You owe me a coke.

[B]

Pinch punch. You owe me a little thank you for this gift. You're welcome. Now I have one more.

[A]

Eating my addiction.

[B]

Now I have one more. Okay, so you got to close your eyes again. Now this time I genuinely need you to hold your hands out kind of like this. Think about to grab something that's just right the other side. There you go. Here we go. Your next gift to celebrate the luck of the Irish.

[A]

Why is it so cold? Can I open?

[B]

Open your eyes. You got your impossible gold with a little beverage of it inside.

[A]

What's in here?

[B]

Oh, we're gonna find out.

[A]

No can.

[B]

We're gonna find out together. I would never leave you on this journey of celebrating the Irish. So we're gonna celebrate.

[A]

What is this?

[B]

Oh, you'll find out.

[A]

Can I smell it?

[B]

No. No smells allowed.

[A]

Did you play?

[B]

Oh, I watched it. I knew you'd freak out. I watched it. I watched it last night. Okay, so we're gonna combine two things that our fans and our beautiful community love us. Celebrating them and celebrating other communities and some trivia.

[A]

Okay?

[B]

So we're simply. I'm just gonna start throwing some trivia.

[A]

I don't know what's in the code.

[B]

No, that's the beauty. That's the beauty. The jewel of that pot of gold from the fairy Thomas that you're holding.

[A]

You put ice.

[B]

Oh, no, it's very cold.

[A]

So cold.

[B]

Very cold.

[A]

OK, here we go.

[B]

So we're gonna combine the two. We're gonna play some St. Patrick's Day. Trivia has nothing to do with St. Patrick's okay? Just regular trivia, okay? Everything you get wrong, you gotta take a drink, okay? And a good drink.

[A]

Okay?

[B]

Okay, here we go. We're gonna start off hot. What was the original color of Coca Cola?

[A]

Like the liquid or the brand?

[B]

What was the original color of Coca Cola?

[A]

Red.

[B]

Green. St. Patrick's Day. Take a sip. No, no, no. Every wrong answer.

[A]

Every wrong answer.

[B]

But you can take bigger sips. Here we go.

[A]

There's a treat in here. Oof.

[B]

In which country is finger pulling considered a serious sport?

[A]

Arizona. Ooh. So bad.

[B]

It's Austria B. Stop. Stop it, Stop it, stop it. Play the game. Play the game right. Because you get a better prize if you get more right than wrong. Now you got to play the game right. What did Mark Twain try to become before he was a worldwide famous writer, an artist? A gold miner? You see how there's semi themed green and gold in St. Patty's you're the worst. You're the worst, he said. Oh, really? No way. Couple more. We're just gonna get a couple more. Keep it flowing. What can bring you bad luck in Italy?

[A]

Garlic?

[B]

Bumping into a nun. Oh, my God. M. You like?

[A]

No.

[B]

Yeah, I know. I'm sorry. It's like lightning. And like the cloud gets dark.

[A]

We have more questions. Right.

[B]

Oh, my.

[A]

You're.

[B]

That thing's not empty.

[A]

No, no, no.

[B]

It looks a little light.

[A]

Oh, it's light as.

[B]

No way.

[A]

I love beer.

[B]

You have more questions.

[A]

Okay. Thank God. Where was this to be like the guy act? Come on.

[B]

Where is it customary to step back on someone if he accidentally stepped on you?

[A]

Immediately. I went basketball.

[B]

Oh, no, but I said where, not what.

[A]

Oh, where is it?

[B]

Location, country specific.

[A]

Can you give me a region?

[B]

If someone steps on you, where can you step on them? Back.

[A]

Germany, probably. They stomp a lot over there.

[B]

Close, but not.

[A]

Good. Beer. Strong beer.

[B]

The answer was Russia.

[A]

Close. Close.

[B]

Couple more. Couple more for you. Oh, God. Which today's. Which today's universe did they drink beer when they made this website? Which today's university is older than the Aztec Empire?

[A]

Oh, it's one of those. It's one of those smart ones. Yale, Harvard, Brown, Ivy League.

[B]

Wrong, wrong, wrong. And not a school. Sounds cool. It sounds cool.

[A]

Duke.

[B]

It's an animal. No, it's an animal mixed with a truck. Animal mixed with a truck.

[A]

A little bit.

[B]

Detroit, Michigan.

[A]

Oh, there's a school called Dodge.

[B]

That's not in Detroit. He's not in Detroit. Oxford. Animal mixed with a truck.

[A]

I thought that was a dictionary.

[B]

No, the Oxford University, they have a school, too. They have a great school. Older than the Aztecs.

[A]

They got a monopoly.

[B]

Oh, last question. Then we can just down The God.

[A]

God bless.

[B]

Here we go. What highly illegal drug used to be in popular medicine for coughing, headaches, cocaine. Gotta cut that one, probably.

[A]

You gotta mute it.

[B]

I will do one more. Why are the pencils yellow, though?

[A]

Oh.

[B]

Why are the pencils yellow again? I think whoever typed this was inebriated, but it's all good.

[A]

Why were the. Why are the pencils.

[B]

Why are the pencils yellow?

[A]

Why are the pencils yellow?

[B]

Yep.

[A]

I assume because of the trees.

[B]

What? How many yellow ferns and oaks have you seen?

[A]

Nobody. You've ever cut down a tree.

[B]

It's not yellow.

[A]

There's a little. There's a hue.

[B]

It's like a wood. Yellow.

[A]

Yellow.

[B]

Is it like yellow?

[A]

No, it's not this yellow.

[B]

That's gold. A straw. That's gold.

[A]

Cousins. They can kiss, though.

[B]

They can kiss at the end that rainbow. Because the best graphite used to come from China, since yellow is their official color and it was a symbol of quality.

[A]

Graphite. Graphite is lead.

[B]

Happy St Patrick.

[A]

To the Irish.

[B]

To the Irish. We absolutely love all of our Irish people and Conor McGregor, but that was a fun little thing pretty much as an excuse for us to drink some beer.

[A]

Hey, I appreciate that. What was the prize if I win?

[B]

Oh, there's nothing.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

I just didn't want you to become a degenerate, start screaming wrong answers to slam the beer.

[A]

It's like I had.

[B]

I had to put a muzzle on you for a second.

[A]

That's like sentencing. That's like sentencing someone to prison and being like, oh, you get a masseuse every day. They're like, oh, no.

[B]

They go, here's your masseuse. His name's John. He comes in. We're going to start on the lowri.

[A]

Okay. Wait. Speaking of beer. Right? It's crazy that you brought this. This is good.

[B]

Cheers. To the art. To the Irish. It's time to play the game.

[A]

It's in there. My crotch is wet now.

[B]

Oh. So was your beer.

[A]

Oh, sorry. Okay. Speaking of beer. Right. There was a trend when we were in college that I never got behind. And I'm 26 years old now. I'm like eight years removed from college, but I still try it to this day because I want to fit in with that college crowd. I never could.

[B]

I did not know where you're going with it.

[A]

Do you remember shower beer? No, Shower beers.

[B]

Oh, I've had a shower. Is it. You drink beer in the shower?

[A]

Yeah, I did.

[B]

Fantastic.

[A]

I never understood that.

[B]

I did that when I was a teacher.

[A]

You were going through A lot.

[B]

I'd come home pissed off and I'd say, give me a cold one.

[A]

No, but genuinely, I never understood shower beers. If you don't know, it's like, it's very much a fraternity. Like people that look like C.J. and Pierce, 100%. Like, it's very much that demographic. It's very much that demographic. It's like, hey, we go in the shower. Not we. You go in the shower. Oh, oh, I wash your bag, you give me a sip. Imagine, I'll watch it.

[B]

I'm just like, oh, that's nice. I got a little itch. That was the beer. That was the beer. Cheers. The Irish.

[A]

Yours is empty. You suck like a fish. Here we go. But, but, but genuinely, I've never been able to get behind the shower beers. And as a 26 year old man, I'll be in my living room, butt, ass naked and I'll be like, I smell my undercarriage. I need to go shower. But it's a weekend and I want to be sexy. So I'll go to my fridge, I'll get a beer, I'll go upstairs to my shower. But I never know the placement of where to stand in the shower because I've tried it hundreds of times, Cameron.

[B]

Then you're just bad.

[A]

I open the beer and then all my shower waters in my beer. Or I try to drink it and I'm getting hit from this side. I'm like.

[B]

You go, okay, naturally. Are you a water on chest, water on back.

[A]

I'm a rotisserie chicken. Okay. I'm in the shower like this.

[B]

You're just spinning. You go, today's another day. You're just so happy.

[A]

I'm like, oh, that's how you're supposed to wash your ass.

[B]

No, the hell it's not. I think you can just get a bar of soap. You're a freak. I'd hate to. I'd hate to stay the night and shower at your place. I go to rub my pits. I'm getting on my underarms.

[A]

Wait, how do you wash your ass in the shower?

[B]

Not with a bar of soap.

[A]

No, I'm saying. But you. But you said.

[B]

No, I've opened up before, but that aggressive open up, never.

[A]

Oh, you got a. You got a bend and cough.

[B]

I never. Two hands and Golden Gate my.

[A]

Oh my God. It's like I'm collecting water. No, my gut gets a little full. I'm like a circus dolphin. I'm like a Sea World attraction. Watch him spit it out.

[B]

Watch out, everybody. Splash zone. Coming soon. You just go. You go. It's just a.

[A]

It looks like LeBron's chalk out of my ass.

[B]

You do that. You do the whole routine with your ass.

[A]

Oh, no, but jingly.

[B]

I take my thing.

[A]

What thing?

[B]

The Manscape body spreader. The little scrub microplastic.

[A]

Okay. You use that on your ass?

[B]

You have to. Where else do you use it that's not more nasty bar a soap.

[A]

Wait, where else do you use that?

[B]

My entire body.

[A]

On your neck.

[B]

My entire body. But listen, listen.

[A]

Are you washing after every shower?

[B]

Washing after every shower.

[A]

So you're.

[B]

What, are you getting oil change after every drive?

[A]

No, I'm saying. So you're using, like, basically a hand scrubber, right?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And you're putting soap on it. You're rubbing it all over your body, and then you're. You're touching back porch, and you're just leaving it there for the next shower.

[B]

I touch back porch. So I do everything. Then genitalia and. But then rinse it off under the water, and I go like this in my hand a little bit and then put it up.

[A]

That's not a good. Okay, but then you're going back.

[B]

Next shower. I take it. Get it wet. Soapy soap. Squeeze, squeeze, squeeze. So we can lather. Start the process over.

[A]

Yeah, bro, you got to do some work.

[B]

Whatever he's doing with the bar of soap. Hey, I don't look like a wolverine when I take my shirt off.

[A]

Yeah, it's a fact.

[B]

Hairy shoulders. Not on.

[A]

We're getting so close to Patreon time. We can. I can feel it in the air. But let's finish the shower. Beers out, right?

[B]

It's so good.

[A]

Yeah. What is the science of a shower? Beer. Does it hit different. Why do people drink beers in the shower?

[B]

So there's two things. One, typically, 99 out of 100 people probably shower warm water. Very good. Feels good. Your beer ice cold.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So you not rotisserie chicken. You need to just turn. Water's on your back. You're feeling it. Nice relaxation. Maybe a little lavender in the air. I don't know why I did that. Was very subjective, but I genuinely just had to itch my nose. Okay, here we go.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Water's on your back and you are facing away. That's when you drink the beer. Water won't hit you. You're good.

[A]

Where do you put the beer?

[B]

Where do you put the beer? Like your shower doesn't have a park bench in it. Yeah, but you put a keg of beer in your shower without it getting wet?

[A]

No, it's not even that.

[B]

You do aerobics in your shower?

[A]

It's not even that. It's. The water hits that bench in my shower, though.

[B]

Do you have a fire hydrant for your spout?

[A]

Where's the water? Good.

[B]

The water should be very concentrated. Like one stream. You got the rainfall above you.

[A]

No, it just goes far.

[B]

Then put it on one of the little etchings in the corner or something.

[A]

Okay. I don't know what showers y'all have. Water is hitting every square inch of my shower at all times.

[B]

That's not true. Or you have the world's most strongest head.

[A]

It doesn't look like a car wash.

[B]

It's like, hype. No, there's no way your water's hitting every inch.

[A]

Guess it is in my shower. Cam, first of all, I'm big bodied. I'm six seven.

[B]

Six seven.

[A]

I'm huge. I'm 280 pounds.

[B]

Oh, you're not.

[A]

I have lean muscle. Okay, 280.

[B]

Lean would be terrifying.

[A]

I'm 220. Almost seven foot. Right. Whenever the water and I have high water pressure on my shower. Might be new. Whenever the water is hitting me, it is spraying everywhere. Every inch of my shower is wet. Where am I putting the beer?

[B]

First? Hide it behind your hollowed torso and just sit there with it and you drink it. Step to the furthest point of your shower. But the reason it's fantastic is because two things. It's a two birds, one stone scenario. And it's yin and yang. Hot and cold. So your body's hot, but cold. Beer going down that tunnel. Jet fuel hitting the engine, getting ready to take off. That's one. And then two things, one stone. Who doesn't like that? Getting two things done at once. You're bathing, getting clean, but you're also starting the night off right. Shower beer is fantastic. Yeah, I had a sandwich in my shower. I don't know how. I don't know. I don't know how. You. You're saying you can't drink a beer? I've eaten a sandwich in my shower.

[A]

You've. You've consumed calories 100 in water.

[B]

Bread, peanut butter and jelly.

[A]

No. Okay, Cam, there's no way I'm dead ass serious.

[B]

I'm dead as serious. I got back from this.

[A]

There is people. There is people on most wanted lists, right? Kidnapping, robbery, it's not that bad. Trafficking, it's not that bad. Then there's camp.

[B]

It's not that bad.

[A]

Eating in the shower might be the most Heinous thing I've ever heard in my life.

[B]

When you respect your body enough and you're on a D. Because I can. I can move my body to where things won't get wet if I don't want them to get wet. Big back.

[A]

That is true. You have a lot of. You got a lot of Max.

[B]

I can block that water. Kept that sandwich nice and tight.

[A]

First of all, how bad are you at delegating your time?

[B]

No, it was. That's the reason I didn't. I didn't have all the time in the world and go, hey, bring me a sandwich. It was a time crunch. I had to go somewhere. I just got back from the gym. I need calories, and I need to be clean.

[A]

You couldn't have taken the PB&J unwrapped.

[B]

Straight to the shower?

[A]

You couldn't have taken the extra minute and a half of your day to finish a sandwich, Cam. Imagine that. Imagine. I don't have to.

[B]

I did it. I f. Ing did the thing.

[A]

You know how you know the texture of that bread you were probably eating?

[B]

Okay, no water. Hit it.

[A]

How hot are you? Hold on. How hot are your showers?

[B]

Lukewarm. Like, I got sensitive skin.

[A]

So there's no steam in your shower?

[B]

There's steam.

[A]

Okay, Kim, naturally, the steam in your shower is going to mess up the molecules of your wheat bread.

[B]

Hey, my molecules of the wheat bread were there for 30 seconds. I am an armadillo. I eat things quickly and leave no trace of evidence.

[A]

Kim, you understand that that's not okay to do.

[B]

It's not normal, but it's not wrong.

[A]

Did you bring a plate in there, too?

[B]

No. It's a PB and J I could crush in my hand. Throw it down. One bite.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

This big. And I went. Took a couple bites, took 45 to a minute, and I was done. Then I turned around, soaped up, Lazar got out.

[A]

But you eat like a caveman, too. You eat, like, gnarled and nasty. I know. There's just. If there's breadcrumbs on your shower drain, you go to hell. Cam. If you're Cam, you have a wife and a child. If they're going into that shower and they're stepping on beads, what's next? Where does it end? Chow main. Next. Where does it end?

[B]

Oh, my God. If I got a bowl from Panda Express, fried rice, orange, chicken. In a shower, Adjust the head, go to the southernmost corner, and I eat that while, like, my ass and low back is getting hit by hot water and the Calves. Oh, God.

[A]

You have low dopamine, don't you? Like you need a fix.

[B]

I need something. Yeah, I need something.

[A]

There's nothing stranger in this world. Nothing stranger that I've done.

[B]

That's bull.

[A]

There's nothing stranger that I've done.

[B]

Would you rather if you. If you had to just y'all two immediately, would you rather eat a PB&J in the shower or go three weeks without bathing? PB&J in the shower? I'd say that too. Off.

[A]

They're equally as dirty.

[B]

No, they're not.

[A]

Yes, it is, Cam.

[B]

I decided to eat peanut butter in the shower. You grew peanut butter on your body by not going three weeks out of shower.

[A]

No, no.

[B]

There's a difference.

[A]

No, no. Because mine just affects me. Yeah. I feel gross. I feel nasty. You share that shower with your family, Cam. You have a sanct, a kingdom.

[B]

I do.

[A]

You have your wife and her nubby little toes.

[B]

Those sausage toast, bro. It wasn't. I didn't leave crumbs, Cam. Imagine I'm not eating tortilla chips.

[A]

First of all, Cam, you don't even wash your legs. So I know there's a little bit of. I know there's a little bit of jelly extract on your shin, brother.

[B]

No, there's not. No, that wasn't jelly.

[A]

And I know. I know there's you over jelly. Your sandwiches, too. So I know when you took a bite, a little bit hit your chest and use a.

[B]

No. Now, that is where I would draw the line. If I got a wet nipple with a hint of Method mint. And then I scrape some jam, I scrape some natural preserves, mix it a little bit of soap, and I go, now that is heinous, dude. That is. I need to be arrested.

[A]

I would much rather. Listen to me. I would much rather never shower again in my entire life.

[B]

Bullshit.

[A]

Then eat in the shower, Peyton.

[B]

I would eat. I want you to hear me and I am honest. I would eat a filet mignon with buttery, flaky bread from Del Frisco's in a shower, butt naked, flaccid.

[A]

Can't see. Barely see.

[B]

It can't really. It's gone. It's like before I went my entire life without showering. I matter of fact, I'd get rid of an arm. I would get rid of an arm before I could not shower for another 50 to 60 years.

[A]

It's really not that bad. There's enough science in this world where you can take a couple, like, daily vitamins, brother.

[B]

You would be the new age Science. If you didn't bathe for. Let's say you had 50 years left. I want you to think about what you were smelling, feeling, and even think you were hallucinating at the three week mark. 50 years.

[A]

You lived with me for the whole year. I didn't shower and you gave me hugs and kisses and a little bit of sex. The you should know podcast this episode is brought to you by our [e-mail] booking.

[B]

Yeah. Every time we use booking.com to find a place to stay in the US I know they're going to have exactly what we're looking for.

[A]

Doesn't matter. Florida, Alabama, Wisconsin, Idaho, Oregon, Texas, Oklahoma, North Dakota, South Dakota, they got a place that we want to [e-mail] they.

[B]

Have a huge variety of options, from hotels to vacation rentals. And I know that we can find exactly what we're looking for.

[A]

We can find exactly what we're looking for.

[B]

And where can we find it?

[A]

Booking.combooking.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

All my friends know that whenever we go somewhere, I'm very specific, very, you know, if we're going to places where there might be a lot of kids, I don't want to be there. If there's somewhere I want a balcony. I want to be on a balcony. If there's somewhere that has a pool, sort of keep me away. But I like to look. All I know is booking.com. booking. Yeah. Has exactly what I need. I'm telling you. Exactly. Great filters, great options. I love booking.com. i love booking that. Yeah.

[B]

No matter who you are, Booking.com helps you find a stay that is ridiculously right for you. Find exactly what you're looking for on booking.combooking.

[A]

Yeah. Now on to the rest of the episode. You should know podcast. Oh, all right. I think it's time to get to people who's. Oh, man, we gotta. We gotta do a drunk episode on Patreon.

[B]

I've cried.

[A]

What? The way you said a little bit of.

[B]

Oh, my God. Happy St. Patrick's Day. That did not happen. That did not happen. Cheers me.

[A]

I think it's time for people's favorite segment. You know what that is? Pop culture.

[B]

He lost all confidence by himself. I took a sip.

[A]

People's favorite segment. Pop culture. Pain and camp.

[B]

Pop culture. Paying a camp bow.

[A]

Our fourth camera sucks. I didn't get a clap or nothing.

[B]

Not a clap, not a nothing.

[A]

All right. You said you had a pop culture this week.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Oh, wait. Can I preface something? Go after every ple. Wwe. That will be the pop culture. The next week. I saw a lot of comments on last week's episode and we got a big WWE audience, so I got y'all.

[B]

I'm getting straight to it.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

If you have Hulu, I'm so dead serious. If you have Hulu, you. You need to watch Paradise. Show called Paradise. It's been buzzing around. You might have heard of it. It is very, very like. It is really good. Seriously, I highly enjoy the way this was.

[A]

What's it about?

[B]

Written. So it is about it. The main character is a special agent that is assigned to the President. Oh, it's already fire.

[A]

Oh, you're gonna say something else.

[B]

Wait, what?

[A]

I thought you were gonna see. Mute it for YouTube.

[B]

Oh, no, no.

[A]

What's it about?

[B]

So the main character is a special agent that has been assigned to the task force. Like to the. Or not task force. Personal bodyguard of the President. Yeah, but immediately like in the show, it's. It's the normal United States. It's not like a. Like a utopian thing.

[A]

Isn't a sci fi, though.

[B]

I mean. Yeah, it's. But I'm saying it's like there's. There's Colorado, there's Arizona. Like, it's real. It's not like they're in Gotham. Like normal cities in normal world. There's a. Like they know this catastrophic thing is going to happen to the world. Okay. And basically it's. It's a volcano in Antarctica that goes off and it sends trillions and trillions of gallons of water. Huge tsunamis. Everything's done.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Okay. So they know that that is happening. So the Paradise. This woman sells a cloud storage company and she gets like $34 billion. Yeah. And she didn't even know it was gonna happen. So this rant. Random ass woman becomes this super powerful girl and she builds an underground city in Colorado that's. You don't even know. You don't even know it's underground. You don't know any of that. To the end of episode one, they go a full. Yeah, sorry.

[A]

But spoiler alert, we'll put that in the.

[B]

I'm gonna stop after there. I'm not gonna tell you, like everything, but it's. It's so good written. That's why I loved it.

[A]

Like, it's.

[B]

It's a dope concept, but the way it was written was so good. Whole episode goes by and then you realize that they're in this thing.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

She builds an underground city and only 25,000 people get to go to the city. And like the rest of the world's like, they're cooked. So. But they go down there in the Special Agent and everything. And then in the first episode, this isn't really a spoiler. You'd be able to see it. But the President dies.

[A]

Nice.

[B]

So then they're trying to find out who did it, why they did it, all this stuff. And then for the next seven episodes straight, it is just. It's all laid out. It is so good.

[A]

I've heard really good things about it.

[B]

Oh, my God. It's one of those shows kind of like a squid game. Like, everyone's talking about it. So let me watch it. But you're so happy you did.

[A]

Dude.

[B]

Such a. Such a good show. You need to watch.

[A]

There's this weird thing about me. It's so hard for me to subscribe to other streaming services. I only have Netflix for as much.

[B]

Netflix is. Netflix is Apple As.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Apple is to the technology 100%.

[A]

But there are so many other good movies and shows on other streaming platform. Yeah. I don't know what it is with me. For as much TV and movies as I watch, I only have one streaming service.

[B]

That is kind of crazy.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I mean, I'm not gonna lie. If I didn't have, like, if Liv didn't sign up for one of these way back when we just still had it. And then my mom, like, I, I, Bro, I'm a die hard Netflix girly.

[A]

Where would you. Okay, so how far are you in the. In the Paradise? Yo. You finished it. Season one.

[B]

There's one season out right now. It. 100. Looks like there's gonna be a season two. Oh, yeah.

[A]

Super successful. Eight episodes I keep seeing everywhere. So where would you put it next to. Let's put up. Yeah.

[B]

Give me, Give me some. Give me some shows.

[A]

Our top shows that we like together. Suits Ozark, bro.

[B]

Like, no, it has. It has potential to compete with Ozark. Oh. Depending on, like, season one of Ozark, Season one of Paradise. Give me Paradise. I'm not even kidding. Like, it's now Ozark became an like.

[A]

One of the best shows ever.

[B]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like, there's only one season now it could get with writing.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But the first. This season's very good, bro. Ozark, it's. It could compete. Bridgerton Bridgeton's good, but it's not the same. Bridgerton's like, you watch.

[A]

I couldn't get into Bridgerton.

[B]

I loved it. But, bro, paradise is up. It is up there. And like, okay, I'll tell You this night Agent. The recruit in paradise. All secret agents. CIA Paradise.

[A]

Really? I love me some night Agent paradise stomps on.

[B]

Night agent.

[A]

Sorry.

[B]

I love the Recruit, though. And it was. It was supposed to be a little cheesier and funny, but I loved it.

[A]

Oh, yeah. It's so good.

[B]

All right, bro, you gotta watch it.

[A]

I'm gonna watch it. I will watch it and then I'll.

[B]

Give you the login.

[A]

Oh, I just thought of a new you rep. Okay. I just thought of a new thing for Patreon that we might.

[B]

I'm all for it. I already. I can already hear your brainwaves.

[A]

I remember I told you, I don't know if they know or even the audience knows. One of my first or, like, second or third YouTube channels was a movie review, like, channel. Like, I used to be, like. I used to talk about lighting and directing and, like, all this. Like, I used to be, like, a huge movie nerd. Maybe we do like, a movie series. TV series on that. On Fantastic Patreon.

[B]

Fantastic.

[A]

To all my quality club members. Let me know if you want that.

[B]

Let us know. That is a fantastic idea. God, I. That is one thing I used to, honest to God, like, as an excuse, but pre. Covered, bro. Movie fanatic.

[A]

Yeah, it's.

[B]

And it. I could easily get back into it. It was such a long time off. Just kind of lost it. But what's yours? What's yours?

[A]

Pop culture? Well, today, and I'm bringing up WWE again.

[B]

Go for it.

[A]

But today, when this comes out, it's John Cena's first time back on Raw since he turned heel, or I think even since his retirement tour, to be honest. This is first Raw. It's in, it's overseas, so that crowd is going to be insane. Oh, they're going to be. But the thing I'm worried about is the overseas crowds are so good because they don't ever really get wwe. Like, we're spoiled over here. Like, every.

[B]

Every Monday, every Friday.

[A]

Yeah. Like, it's going to be in the US we get a lot of the ples and stuff, but when they're over there, they're so excited. So think how long they haven't seen John Cena.

[B]

Yeah. So, like, they're going to be hyped regardless. Like, they're gonna.

[A]

He's supposed to be heel, but, like, that's also John Cena. We haven't seen him in a decade.

[B]

They won't give him the appropriate and deserved negativity. But it should go into the.

[A]

If they do.

[B]

Oh, boy.

[A]

It's going to be monumental and I can't wait to see. I think him and John Cena and Cody are going to do a promo against each other. I've always said this into my w. I've talked to Santi about this. If you're a WWE fan, you know who Santhi is. I'm not super into Cody Rhodes promos. Like when he's on the mic, I do not think he's that good. But. And John Cena is one of the best to ever do it. So I am very excited to see how that goes. He'll see off each other. Yeah, he'll Cena versus Babyface Cody. I think it's gonna be great. So yeah, I'll be watching that with y'all tonight so we can talk about it on Twitter @yskpod.dpsha to get us out of here or that was pop culture paying a camp. Pop culture paying a camp Bow. Get us out of here again, first.

[B]

And foremost, happy St. Patrick's Day and thank you for coming back and spending it with us. Episode 156. We absolutely love you all. Thank you for coming back. Can't wait to see you next Monday. As you should know, no pun intended, but as you should know, Koala Club are the elites of the elites. They are loving it. We love them. It is the first link in the description that is where you get all sorts of you should know podcast, you get vlogs, you get games, you get behind the scenes stuff. You get early access to merch, early access to tour, early access to tickets, and so much more. You can call me Dr. Seuss, but first link in the description is the Koala Club. We love all of our Patreon members and we appreciate you so, so much. Everything else is down there as well. Instagram's, Facebook twitches, Twitters, all of that in the description. Confuse the casuals. Get your good karma. This week's code. HSP.

[A]

Happy St. Patrick's Happy St. Patrick's Go.

[B]

Hug an Irish friend, tell him you love him and send the podcast to him. Bring it in, you Irish. I don't know. I've never done the the DNA test. You gotta sneeze. I don't want to be around you with your sneeze. Pineapples.

[A]

It'll get there.

[B]

Anaconda.

[A]

If you've made it this far in the episode and you look down, you haven't commented, you haven't subscribed, you haven't hit the like button or you haven't hit the bell button, you're wrong. Get that. Good karma. It's your last chance. Leave the secret code below. We love you. And remember, 1 out of 10 koala bears don't make it. On to Christmas. And we will see you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Next time. No.

[B]

Tell them I said, Happy St. Pat's yeah.

[A]

To your ginger friend.

[B]

See you later. Three leaf clover.

[A]

@ Don Miller Subaru west, we believe in being a positive force in our local community. Together with our customers, we have been able to sponsor and support local charity and nonprofits. Don Miller Subaru west has once again partnered with the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society of the Upper Plains region. Our donations have helped fund cutting edge research to cure cancer and improve the quality of life for so many. Helping those in need, that's the Subaru love promise. Don Miller Subaru West. More than a car dealer.