THE $1 MILLION TRADING CARD PRANK! -You Should Know Podcast-

Summary

You Should Know Podcast – Episode 218

Episode Title: THE $1 MILLION TRADING CARD PRANK!
Date: May 25, 2026
Hosts: Peyton Hardin & Cameron Kennedy

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Episode Overview

In this hilarious and energetic episode, best friends and co-hosts Peyton and Cam recount wild recent adventures — from a chaotic New York trip, embarrassing card shop stories, and the most savage TSA snub, to classic debates about Netflix etiquette with your partner. The highlight of the episode is a suspense-filled trading card “rip” session that turns out to be the ultimate prank on Cam, pulling off what might be the show's most elaborate and emotional joke to date.

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Key Discussion Points & Memorable Segments

1. New York Trip Gone Wrong (06:00 – 16:00)

• The Great $600 Hotel Mix-Up:

  • Cam mistakenly books an extra hotel because he missed the company's paid reservation, resulting in a $609 loss.
  • Peyton holds Cam accountable on-air, escalating a friendly argument:
    • “He says, you owe me $609...I decline...because it was an honest mistake.” — Cam (07:33)
  • The saga is retold with interruptions, playful accusations, and reluctant admissions of blame.
  • Notable quote:
    • "I ended up buying his cards, then he ends up pulling a Chase card out of the stuff." — Cam (09:10)

• Airport Card Shop & Card Pulls:

  • The hosts stop for card packs before flying out, which will set up the later, now-legendary prank.
  • Peyton pulls a rare card, prompting more gloating.

2. Public Embarrassment: The TSA Snub (10:00 – 13:00)

• Cam gets recognized solo at TSA while Peyton, standing right there, is ignored.
  • “He literally goes, no, no, no. The guy you do the podcast with.” — Peyton recalling the moment (11:09)
  • Both hosts riff on this indignity, highlighting their chemistry and competitiveness.

3. How Not To Behave In Bars (13:14 – 17:00)

• The Communal Pretzels Incident:
  • Cam “wolfs” down a massive bowl of pretzels left on a used table at a New York bar, mortifying Peyton and causing the bartender to intervene.
  • “He sounds like a pit bull eating these pretzels.” — Peyton (14:26)
  • Ongoing debate: Is eating old bar pretzels ethically okay? (Quick answer: No.)

4. Drunken Antics & Domestic Realities (17:03 – 24:35)

• Hotel Room Chaos:

  • Peyton does front flips in his underwear, cheered on by his wife, Sarah, and much to Cam's dismay.
    • “Literally going like this in his draws, going, louder, babe, louder. I can't hear you!” — Cam (17:53)
  • Cam considers a “sit down drunk shower,” prompting a debate about the dangers of showering while drunk.
    • “Bro. Don't do that. You could die.” — Peyton (18:45)

• Sacred Couples’ TV Time Debate:

  • Should you finish the episode when one person gets tired, or turn it off immediately?
    • “You gotta finish the episode. You have to finish the episode.” — Peyton (56:36)
    • Cam disagrees, resenting having to catch up or being forced to keep awake.

5. Mother’s Day Mayhem & Gift-Giving Philosophy (25:01 – 33:59)

• Gift-Giving Debates:
  • Is it better to get someone what you think they want, or something “useful” that matches their habits—even if it’s a bad one?
  • Illustrative stories:
    • Peyton witnessing a bunny tragedy involving crows and his car, to Sarah’s horror (27:21–29:05).
    • Cam overhearing a hilarious Target conversation about getting someone a vape or wine for Mother's Day (30:48–32:19).
    • “Let's just get her a vape and call it a day.” — Target shopper “Jacob” per Cam (31:38)

6. Tech Talk: GPS and Surveillance (43:55 – 52:15)

• Amazement at GPS Technology:
  • Peyton marvels at GPS’ accuracy and wonders how it calculates arrival times, traffic, and detours.
    • “It is unfathomable how smart GPS is.” — Peyton (44:08)
  • Paranoia follows as they discuss how much data is collected by our devices and whether “burner phones” are the way to go.

7. The Trading Card “Rip” and the $1 Million Prank (68:35 – 79:30)

• Set-Up:
  • The hosts agree to rip packs (open trading cards) “on camera” after being sent product by fictional “Orbit Sports Cards.”
• The Prank:
  • Cam pulls what appears to be an ultra-rare, rookie-auto Cooper Flagg card (claimed value: $1,100–$4,000+ upon grading).
  • His genuine emotional reaction gives way to heartbreak as the hosts reveal the pack was “resealed” and the signature is fake.
    • “This is actual crying.” — Cam, realizing the prank’s depth (76:58)
    • “That is a K Rob signature on there.” — Peyton (77:15)
  • The prank reveals how far Peyton and the team went: sourcing fake cards, heat-sealing packs, and even buying decoy product for authenticity.
    • “I can’t wait for all the hate comments I’m about to get.” — Peyton (79:27)

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Quotes & Timestamps: Notable Moments

• On Friendship and Honesty:

  • “Honesty is the best policy.” — Peyton (04:45)

• On Card Collecting:

  • “You get too invested. Like, you are, like, in there, in there.” — Peyton (71:28)
  • “That’s probably my... There’s not too many times I say I enjoyed that prank. This time, I enjoyed that. That was hilarious.” — Cam (80:41)

• On Couples TV Watching:

  • “That’s probably the most selfish thing you could do is turn it off.” — Peyton (57:30)
  • “I hit the bed and I’m sorry. You’ve definitely 100%, but we’re on the third episode…” — Cam (57:06)

• On GPS:

  • “GPS is fundamentally, like, insane.” — Peyton (49:48)

• On Being Pranked:

  • “Oh, dude, I think these are real tears. Like, I didn’t even play.” — Cam (76:58)
  • “That’s up, bro. I’m not gonna lie. That is. That is messed up, bro. It’s genius. I love it.” — Cam (78:17)

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Additional Themes & Running Jokes

• Playful Rivalry: The episode is a showcase in friendly one-upmanship, with Peyton and Cam constantly teasing, needling, and out-pranking each other.

• Food Morality: Cam’s “communal pretzel” philosophy is both a running joke and a point of disgust for Peyton, who also calls out Cam’s selfish McDonald’s binge.

• Gadget Paranoia & Surveillance: Both hosts joke about burner phones and surveillance, parodying both tech awe and paranoia.

• Physical Comedy: Stories of wild in-room acrobatics and “triple-booked” travel add a slapstick flavor.

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Conclusion

This episode is a perfect snapshot of the You Should Know Podcast’s spirit: unfiltered storytelling, relentless teasing, and the kind of brotherly chemistry only best friends can pull off. Whether you’re here for the gift-giving debate, wild New York stories, or the epic $1 million trading card prank, this is one of the show’s most outrageous (and, per Cam, “enjoyable”) installments yet.

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Timestamps & Segment Index

| Time | Segment | |--------|------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 06:00 | The $609 Hotel Debacle, Card Shop, and Airport Stories | | 10:00 | TSA Snub — Being Recognized as “the Other Guy” | | 13:14 | New York Bar & Communal Pretzels Fiasco | | 17:03 | Hotel Shenanigans: Drunk Showers and TV Etiquette Debate | | 25:01 | Mother’s Day, Gift Giving, and Bunny Tragedy | | 43:55 | GPS Technology: Rants, Raves, and Paranoia | | 68:35 | Card “Rip” Session and $1 Million Trading Card Prank | | 79:30 | Prank Revelation, Cam’s Reaction, and Wrap-up |

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Final Note:
If you’re not yet a YSK fan, this episode is all the reason you need to join in — friendly roasts, genuine laughs, and some of the best prank execution you’ll hear in podcasting.

Transcript

[A]

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[A]

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[A]

rest of the episode. I'm not having fun. I'm like the kid on Chris. What?

[B]

I'm serious. I think I'm holding a Cooper flag.

[A]

Rookie auto. I swear to God. Swear to God.

[B]

No way. Phone is something you can control if

[A]

I am watching you control your sleep too.

[B]

Dude, you're about to make me actually mad.

[A]

It's like very thin right there.

[C]

I missed my rent due to going and playing some poker.

[A]

Have you paid your rent playing some poker?

[B]

100%.

[A]

What's up guys? It's Peyton and Cam from the you should know podcast.

[B]

Did you know you can watch the

[A]

you should know podcast on Spotify?

[B]

If you're subscribed to Spotify premium, you don't get any Spotify ads during our show.

[A]

The you should know podcast. Hey everybody. Welcome back to you should know podcast episode 218. We got co host Cam back in the studio.

[B]

You all right?

[A]

You Hurt yourself, dude.

[B]

Oh, wedding ring. Right to front knuckle. That's a wedding ring. Nucky, I thought you had a rubber band. Huh? No. Oh, gosh, no. Dude. Can I say that in my clicks and ticks?

[A]

No.

[B]

Had to get rid of it. I threw it out on the highway, actually. I hope a bird didn't need it, but I literally would fidget with it like this. I did the sequence and it never failed. I did it the whole car ride home. And one day I caught myself in it. I said, what is wrong with me? I'm a grown man through it. That's what.

[A]

I've never been a fan of the rubber ring. Maybe it's because I'm a boosh. I'm a little bouge. I'm a little. You're a pastor. I'm a little. I like this.

[B]

I like a little bit of this. You said, look at my watch. You held your hand like that. Like, no one does that.

[A]

It wasn't my watch. It was my slap bracelet. And speaking of watches, I got a Pokemon smartwatch. It takes digital photos, videos and MP3s.

[B]

MP3s is crazy. It takes photos. What'd you say? Photos.

[A]

Digital video.

[C]

What?

[B]

That thing has a camera?

[A]

Yeah, look, it's a camera right there. Me and Sarah made out on it. So there's only one video. It's us making out on it. Dude, you.

[B]

I mean, you are the epitome. Epitome. You are the epitome of. I'm going to use my free will correctly, dude.

[A]

Yeah, I am.

[B]

Yo, dude, babe, I bought this freaking Pikachu digital video taking Pokemon watch. Let's tongue. Let's just absolutely make out.

[A]

Yeah. And then when I bought a Gengar. A pillow. Pillow. It's fair.

[B]

When we were in New York, you called it gangor, but I didn't. I didn't have it in me too.

[A]

I was also 99% drunk in New York. Like, can I say that? Dude? Let's do a New York review. New York review. Hey, New York review. Huh? New York review. Hey, New York review. Hey, New York. Hey, New York review. Here we go. Oh, yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Hey.

[A]

Hey, New York review. Me and Cam took a boys trip to New York.

[B]

We did. It was fun.

[A]

Very quick.

[B]

Very fun.

[A]

It felt like college again. Me and you. I love when it's just me and you. Before they came along and ruined everything.

[B]

Oh, my God, that's so rude.

[A]

I love us.

[B]

Yes. I love us hanging out together. Now, Grant, now, I also have deep love for the whole.

[A]

You know, the whole Situation here.

[B]

No, I do.

[A]

I love all of them as well. I love it more when it's just us and it's honest, and I think that's okay to say. That's fun. Yeah.

[B]

I've never met a man as straightforward as you. I mean, you're just like, dude, no, I like you, but I like it more when you're not here. Have a good one. That's just crazy.

[A]

Honesty is the best policy.

[B]

It is? Well, yeah.

[A]

And you were not honest at the start of our New York trip.

[B]

How. What did I possibly lie about, Cam? What did I lie about in New York, Cam?

[A]

Before we even started the trip, Cam costed me, dude. How about, hey, fist, welcome to my face cam wasted $600 of my USD.

[B]

Okay, no.

[A]

Okay, $600 before the trip started.

[B]

Now, that's wrong. That is wrong.

[A]

Oh, how that's wrong?

[B]

Because of one thing, one very, very important detail. What happened. Now, I'm gonna describe this story, and if you interrupt, it ceases. Okay? That's how that's gonna work.

[A]

So wait. Oh, no, no, wait. Before you start.

[B]

And I'm gonna tell truth, facts. Your words on the. My hands on the holy word.

[A]

That's the armrest.

[B]

This is an armrest of a leather couch.

[A]

The whole truth or your truth?

[B]

The whole. The truth. Oh. Oh, dude. My truth. Oh, God. I don't want to hear it in the comments. There's the truth. What happened?

[A]

Okay.

[B]

There's what happened.

[A]

Okay. If he tells a lie, I do have right to interject.

[B]

No, you do not. I have.

[A]

Just wait.

[B]

Wait till the end. Matter of fact, raise your hand. You raise your hand. I grant you.

[A]

Okay, I'll raise my pause.

[B]

So before going to New York, about the 11th hour, like a whole day before we leave, I go, dude, what hotel are we staying at? We need to check our. Our itinerary. So we go and check it, and neither one of us were like, oh, I don't know. So then a couple hours go by, and it's like, nighttime before we're about to leave. So I'm like, bro, I don't think we have a hotel.

[A]

Can I preface that? This trip was paid for by a company.

[B]

Yes. This trip was paid for flights, everything. We knew where we were going, but we did not know where we were going to lay our head.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And I go, hold on, let me check. He was out doing something with family. So I said, you know what? I'm a check. I go to the itinerary. Now, I did not see any hotel accommodations, so I Text back, oh, wow, we need to get a hotel.

[A]

Very important step right there.

[B]

He's interjecting.

[A]

I'm not. I'm emphasizing what you're saying. That's a very important step.

[B]

That's very important.

[A]

Cam checked the itinerary and told me we have no hotel. Yes, Cam said that out of his mouth.

[B]

I said that. I said we don't have a hotel. We need to get one. So then P finishes his night with his fam, comes back home, clickety clack, bang, boom. Hotel secured, $609 after tax. Now the very next day, we're getting ready to leave and we look and I just look at the itinerary again for my confirmation number for the flight. There's a hotel. Now, how I did not. How I missed that the first time, I have no clue.

[A]

Like a five star hotel.

[B]

Like we had. I mean, arguably an incredible like prob. One of the nicest hotel I've stayed in New York so far. Beautiful hotel and it's paid for, so ring a ding ding. Hey, P. We have a hotel. Try to cancel that now. He tries to call and cancel. No one answers. It just goes to this recorded line. So out the $609.

[A]

Now.

[B]

This is where I am prideful, but I will stand my ground. He says, you owe me $609. The reason I decline to to accept that as truth is because it was an honest mistake. It was an honest mistake.

[A]

It's true.

[B]

But it was the company account that we. Listen, no. Oh, before you start. It was the company account that we use for travel expenses. Anything the company needs. Now did I still. That's a mess up. I am at fault 100%.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

I don't think I have to give you in your personal wallet.

[A]

I didn't say personal. 600 now company accounts under my name. So I said it has to come to me regardless.

[B]

My God, we've had such bigger mix ups today. Oh my God. We've like triple booked flights on the company account. No one's had to repay it. You. He's trying. He's trying to manipulate and take advantage of me. Poor little lost widow. You're trying to. You're trying to take advantage of me. We stop at the card shop literally 30 minutes before the Uber picks us up to go to the airport. Yeah, we go, let's buy some packs. We can rip them in the airport. Yeah, we go to the card shop. I want two of these. He wants two of those. We get up to the counter, this man turns into a literal lawyer and so, hey, by the way, bro, you know he'd be in jail if it wasn't for me right now. And the guy's scanning. He's like, wait, what? He's like, oh, no. Yeah, he owes me $609. Yeah, maybe you should pay for my cards, Cam. And I go, oh, no. Go to hell. Not happening. And the guy goes, dude, I don't know the way it sounds. You should probably buy his cards. And he starts joining in on me, and then I give him this whole story, and he goes, dude, I'm not going to lie. I think you're at fault. You should buy his cards. I end up buying his cards, then he ends up pulling a Chase card out of the stuff.

[A]

I pull like a $20,000 John Cena card or something. But, I mean, it's fantastic.

[B]

It's so stupid. I do not. I still.

[A]

No, I'm just saying. So your story has changed a little bit because before, you were neglecting responsibility, and that's where I was getting upset.

[B]

No, it is my fault.

[A]

You're like, no, it's not my fault. I'm not doing. It's like, it was an accident. It's not my fault. That's what you were saying up until the point of the camera. So I'm glad now on a public forum, that is not so. It's fine.

[B]

No, that is not. It's fine. I always say that was my fault. I messed up. Didn't see that. But ye not giving you 600 of my dollars from this mistake. Yeah, that's what I was saying.

[A]

But I ended up paying for the sleeves.

[B]

Yeah, he bought the 299Sleeves. I bought the over 300 in the cards, but it's fine. And he pulled the crazy card in the airport.

[A]

Yeah, it's on my TikTok if you wanna watch it. But another thing that happened is me and Cam went to the airport together, right?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And normally when me and Cam go to the airport together, if we get recognized. We get recognized together.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

It's like, oh, y' all are the guys from the podcast.

[B]

I've never.

[A]

I've never been so disrespected in my life, like, ever.

[B]

Oh, no, this was actually. I mean, this was absolute bananas. Yeah. This was insane.

[A]

So we go through tsa, and at the end of tsa, when you're picking up your bags, there's an agent right there. The agent, I guess, had seen Cam before.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So him and Cam dap up. He goes, oh, my guy. And then the guy, the TSA Agent's talking to Cam about the podcast. He literally goes, oh, how's the podcast going? I'm standing right there, by the way. Like, I'm right next to Cam.

[B]

I'm literally not even a full extension of an arm. Like, it's me, and P is right next to me. I could, like, elbow P. Yeah.

[A]

So this guy's basically having a conversation with both of us, but just looking at Cam. So I'm standing there. I'm not in a disguise. My face is out.

[B]

You're not even on your phone.

[A]

No, I'm wearing YSK House tour merch. Like, that's going to be available on tour. I'm wearing that.

[B]

Right.

[A]

So he knows I'm like, that's. This is me, right?

[B]

100%.

[A]

He's talking to Cam and he goes, where's the other guy?

[B]

Literally says that P is directly next to me. He goes, where's the other guy?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I was like, I mean, right? He's right here. Tell him what he said.

[A]

He goes, no, no, no. The guy you do the podcast with, he literally.

[B]

He literally. Peyton standing right next to me wearing the YSK House tour merch. And every video he's seen of me, I'm in every single one. He goes, where's the other guy? I went, he's right here. He goes, no, no, no, no, no. Like, the guy you do the show with. The other guy. And I went, people said.

[A]

And at this time, I'm like, oh. He's, like, a little lost. So I extend my hand for the dap to show you, like, hey, it's me. I go, what's up, bro? He literally goes, where's the guy you do the pod with? He ignores my dap.

[B]

No, it was. I was 50% of the.

[A]

You, like, I'm half of it.

[B]

You can flip a coin. I am always the other choice.

[A]

You've never seen YSK content. I'm not in. That's never happened, dude.

[B]

Ever, buddy.

[A]

Ever miss your agent?

[B]

Literally. He said. He said, oh, yeah, what's up? He was like, no, no, wait. Like, where's the other guy? Yeah, and I don't. I think he was talking about K Rob, because the.

[A]

What? I mean, what the. Robbie moved the Drake? I don't know. Holy.

[B]

I think he was talking about K Rob because the first time we went to. It was something. Oh, when we were going to the WWE and you were on a separate flight. We were on different flights, and me and Krab were on the same one. Yeah, we went through that exact TSA and met that guy. But the fact that he said, the guy you do the show with, you

[A]

don't do the show with him.

[B]

I literally said, right. Right here. He said, oh, no.

[A]

The other guy, he refused to acknowledge my existence. Didn't even touch me. Like, I was disgusting. I was the bottom.

[B]

Yeah, bro, that. Oh, my God. I completely forgot about that. No, no, you. Now this is something I think you forgot about. In New York, this would be the last thing. So, okay, we are. We're grown little girls, and we decided to have a little New York girls night.

[A]

We did have a girls night, New York.

[B]

To a little billiard, a little pool hall. Didn't shoot any pool, but we drank a lot.

[A]

Underground pool halls. Underground pool outside of Webster Hole. Yeah.

[B]

I ate pretzels that weren't. That did not belong to me.

[A]

Oh, my God, Cam. Dude, this proves my point.

[B]

I ate communal pretzels.

[A]

It proves my point how nasty Cam is.

[B]

Yeah, it was kind of bad.

[A]

We showed to a bar, right? This bar is, like. And it's late at night, so this bar has been used and abused all night.

[B]

Oh, it's. I mean, it's sticky. You walk around.

[A]

Yeah. So we sit at the bar top, right? Yeah, at the bar top. You could tell there's, like, the drink rings on the bar. Like, somebody had just sat there. The seat was still hot. From somebody. Oh, yeah, Right on the bar. There was a bowl of, like, pretzels that somebody had ordered from before.

[B]

Big bowl.

[A]

Like, you didn't tell me it doesn't

[B]

look like a communal bowl.

[A]

Yeah, it's a huge bowl you do

[B]

for, like, your, like, family at, like, movie night.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, that is a huge bowl of pretzels.

[A]

Cam sits. I get there first.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Came out to go back to the room for something. I get there first. I see the bowl of pretzels. I'm like, yeah, I'm not acknowledging this. This used foreign bowl of pretzels. It's disgusting that it's still out, by the way. So I sit next to it. Cam comes by, sit down. He goes, oh, dude, pretzels. And I go, cam, those are all. There's a bin here. And he goes, I don't give a Wolfing these foreign pretzels.

[B]

I mean, I smack about a third of the bowl.

[A]

So much to the point where, like, he's making. He sounds like a pit bull eating these pretzels. So much to the point where the bartender realizes that Cam's eating pretzels that he didn't order. And she comes and is like, oh, sir, no, no. And he's like, well, one more. Yeah, one more. He's like wrestling.

[B]

But my thing. Why are you trying to take it away though? Just cuz I didn't pay for it. I understand that part, but I'm eating it. Like, why you're just gonna throw them away? That's the part I didn't agree with.

[A]

That's for the rats.

[B]

Outside of New York, if I buy a beer and I leave and there's a sip of a beer and someone else comes up and takes it, they shouldn't be wrong.

[A]

Topping off other people's beers.

[B]

That's crazy. No, I'm not. I'm saying the same thing, but reverse. Someone bought the pretzels. I was enjoying them. Why did she take away. She got like. I think she was jealous that she couldn't eat them.

[A]

That's the same thing of say. You're like. You walk into a Texas roadhouse, right?

[B]

If someone bought the steak.

[A]

Yeah, but they want you to buy. But they want you to buy a steak too.

[B]

I mean, that's true.

[A]

It's not though. It's not a.

[B]

Like, that's true.

[A]

That's not a hand me down restaurant.

[B]

That's a good point.

[A]

It's like, eat what people don't.

[B]

That's a nasty second where you walk in and you get what you get.

[A]

Oh, you walk. Imagine that you walk into a restaurant. It has a fridge in there. And like, if you don't finish your meal, you just throw it in the fridge and audit. Oh my God.

[B]

You buy a five dollar raffle ticket. There could be like a tomahawk steak in there or could just be like some cold mashed potatoes. Oh, my God. Do we need to patent that?

[A]

No, I would never walk in.

[B]

You can either sit down, be seated, and wait on, or you buy a five dollar admission ticket to the fridge.

[A]

I mean, that cannot be hip.

[B]

And no matter what's in there, you get to pull one entree.

[A]

I mean, the CDC would not approve.

[B]

Oh, we'd get shut down.

[A]

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[B]

Anyway, so, I mean, I'm absolutely mauled. The pretzels, they were good too. Rolled gold, solid pretzel. But I eat the pretzels. We have a lot of drinks and it's time to go back to the hotel. So to fast forward this, just know we were drunk to the point where he is in his underwear doing front flips in his bedroom. He's doing front flips. Front flip.

[A]

Front flips.

[B]

Landing on me with his bony ankles and knees. It was terrible.

[A]

Yeah. I was trying to see how high I could get. I. Did I ever elevate set?

[B]

You never want. It was more of an outward. Like, you didn't go up. You would flip like this.

[A]

You're like, I would literally get in my underwear. Like butt naked. Just my underwear. And I bring my underwear. Oh.

[B]

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You can see pubes. No, no, no. That can't stay. No, I can't stay. Oh, my God. I mean, I saw absolute pubic region.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Shout out to the.

[A]

Whatever.

[B]

It is revolting. So Sarah's on the other. First off, dude, Sarah, you. I mean, that's your wife. Let's just put that. Sarah is applauding him like a one man team. She's like, go, baby, go, baby, go. Peyton's in the bathroom as far as he can get away from the bed. Literally going like this in his draws, going, louder, babe, louder. I can't hear you. She's like, go, baby, go, baby, go. And I'm just like the broker of this moment. I'm holding the phone going, it was ridiculous. He's doing front flips. So it gets to the point I call it. I'm like, yeah, I'm getting out of this. I was like, this is not for me. And I say this simple line. I go, man, you know, I'm that type of drunk right now. Like, I kind of want to go back and shower and just turn it real hot and just sit down in the shower. And Peyton, word for goes, bro. Don't do that. You could die.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What do you mean yeah? Yeah. He Literally said, bro, you haven't heard? You can die if you sit down in the shower.

[A]

You can. It's like falling asleep in the bath.

[B]

Who said I'm asleep in a bath? Oh, my God. You did say a bath is still water. Still, you can go under. You are sucking in water. It fills your lungs. You drown.

[A]

I hate that a shower drains.

[B]

How can you.

[A]

I hate. I hate to be like that kind of person. But you can keep running.

[B]

What?

[A]

You can keep running a bath with the drain open. It's the same thing as a shower at that point. You take baths with the shower running. It's the sexy baths.

[B]

I don't.

[A]

I don't take baths. But I've seen people like you. You fill it up to a point, right, with the drain closed. And then you open the drain and keep the shout and keep the bath water running. It's 100% a thing. So it's the same principle with the shower. You can definitely drown in a shower sitting down.

[B]

That's like saying you could go outside and pop a squat and sit crisscross when it's raining. I don't do that. You can die. There's no. There's no water for you to drown.

[A]

Yes, there is. So there's a couple things here. First of all, if you're like this, right, and you're drunk. That's what I'm saying. That's. You gotta add that caveat.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

You were intoxicated.

[B]

Very intoxicated, yes.

[A]

So if you sit down, first of all, I can't imagine you sitting down on the ground. Like you have too much mass.

[B]

Well, I did sit down, by the way, when I said, oh, yeah, I got. I had to get a little more hot. That tile is cold on my. But it was good after that.

[A]

So you're sitting down in the shower, right. And if that shower, it's hitting directly in the face and you fall asleep or pass out. That is a. That is genuinely a way to die.

[B]

No, it is not. Can.

[A]

That's the same thing of, like, falling asleep, like, on your back, and you throw up. You can die that way. I learned that in Dare by Officer Dan.

[B]

You can't die first off, okay. If you pass out.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You're immediately open to any form of death. You don't know what's going on. Anything can happen. The phone could fall off the wall, hit you in the head, the right spot.

[A]

It's true. But you don't want to be under a waterfall either. So that's what I'm saying. That Increases the chance and you. There's no way you think I'm wrong. The second option is if you sit on the drain, then it becomes a bathtub.

[B]

Who's sitting on the drain?

[A]

How big's the shower?

[B]

You saw that hotel is gorgeous. The shower's huge.

[A]

Your shower was way bigger than mine.

[B]

I had the handicap room. I had the corner of the handicap.

[A]

Yeah, they saw you, and they're like,

[B]

there's a lot of space. Really wide doorways. Definitely made for a wheelchair, but is that what those are for? 100%.

[A]

Is that why the handicap room doors

[B]

are so big, is for wheelchairs? Yeah. What do you. What, you just thought they had big doors? Harder to push open doors? That was some sick, twisted joke.

[A]

No, it wasn't.

[B]

That give a metal door in the handicap room. No, it's.

[A]

Never thought about that.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

That's what the rail's there for too.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Anyway, there's a bathtub with a door on it.

[B]

This man, think. What'd you just say?

[A]

There was that one time I went to a hotel. It was a handicap room. It was a bathtub with a door on it. That makes sense. Just like, roll in there. It's not. That's not messed up. That's what I thought it was.

[B]

No, no, not the word roll. You said roll in there.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

I should have. You know, and now that's where. And I'm sorry. I'm sorry. That's where. I. Forgive me.

[A]

But yeah. That was our New York trip.

[B]

It was a crazy trip.

[A]

I don't. I. I don't like getting drunk like that anymore. It was.

[B]

It was fun, though.

[A]

It was fun.

[B]

Like, in the. In the bounds of which we did it. We didn't do anything crazy. We didn't go out. We went out, but we just walked, like. Like club or like something like popping spot where, like, we literally were just ducked off.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Enjoying drinks with each other, talking.

[A]

Yeah. I'm glad you left the room because being around you is making me want to be more of a rock star. And so I was like, right before you left, I threw all the. The card holders at the wall. Exploded.

[B]

Every pack. 100 pack of penny sleeves. He just picked it up, chunked it at the wall, exploded everywhere.

[A]

Yeah. There was a point where I grabbed the lamp and I was banging it on the tv, and I was like. I was like, do you think this can break?

[B]

No. Dude. You get weird when we're drunk together. You get weird when I try to leave you. You don't like when I leave you, bro, you try to make me stay you. I forgot. You get strange, bro. I was like, hey, I'm gonna go shout. You said, no, bro. Playing get back in here. Like, you literally said that. I said, no. I said, bro, it's really late. We gotta wake up early. You said, no, bro. It's get back, come back. And I'm like, whoa, yes. You do that every time. You said, all right, you don't even have to talk to me. Can you just help me pick up the sleeves? It's like you need me in your presence. You did say that.

[A]

Please help me.

[B]

You go, bro, just help me pick up the sleeves. I said, you threw it your mess. He said, bro, honestly, you. But, but like. But like, not yet. Come back. Like, it is weird, dude.

[A]

I just like having fun, bro. I don't ever. I don't ever get to hang out.

[B]

No, I know that and I love that. Wait, you get to that threshold, it just gets a little. I'm like, is he gonna be all right if I leave the room? That's why I started thinking, like, he's sad, man. You close the door, he unlocks something in him.

[A]

You're just like, you close the door, you put your ear up to the door just to check if I'm okay.

[B]

Left me.

[A]

What would you do if you heard that? Oh, would you have come back in?

[B]

Oh, I would have knocked on the door. I probably would have slapped you. Just like, get together, like, get it together. What are you doing? How would you have.

[A]

You came back.

[B]

You're right. You might. You can stay though, dude. It's.

[A]

No, I think you would have stayed in that room a little longer. I would have invited you to sleep in the bed. I think so, dude. It's just more fun when you're there.

[B]

Wait, let's answer the question. Did you ever shower? Did you take a sit down shower?

[A]

I can't remember anything after throwing the cards at the wall. I cannot remember much after that.

[B]

I guarantee your dirty. Just woke up, put on the same golf pants, didn't brush your teeth, didn't shower. And you said, hey, bro, where you at? Like, how do I always beat you to get ready? Because you're disgust. I'm like, peyton, I. I gotta get clothes on. I gotta steam it. You did steam your clothes.

[A]

I did steam my clothes the night before because I knew I wasn't probably gonna shower. So I was like, I have to. I have to get up.

[B]

That is. That's watching you get ready to go work in a foreign city is fantastic.

[A]

Did You. Was this. Liz. First Mother's Day?

[B]

No. I literally have a son that's over one year old.

[A]

I thought, well, that doesn't mean that he had a Mother's Day or that she had a Mother's Day.

[B]

If she.

[A]

If he was born after Mother's Day and the first time, this would be his first Mother's Day.

[B]

Okay, so we're going to rewind to the part where he's over 12 months old.

[A]

Yeah, he's, like, 14.

[B]

He's 15. He's going to be 16 here in two weeks. So with that logic. Right. There's been an entire calendar of his life.

[A]

Does that not make sense to anybody, what I'm saying, though? Like. No, no, no.

[B]

So let's do this.

[A]

No, let me understand. Let me make sense.

[B]

Let me make this.

[A]

Okay, listen. So say. Say Malachi. Let's bring this to Christmas. Say Malachi was born on December 26th.

[B]

Yep. Right.

[A]

And then this would be the first Christmas he had, because a year later.

[B]

So he's born the 26th. But now let's say he's 13 months old. So he's lived an entire year, which means literally any day. Any day. He's experienced it. Any day.

[A]

Oh, yeah. You're. You're drenched.

[B]

I mean, I'm drenched.

[A]

Wait, what did we do for Liv's first Mother's Day?

[B]

I didn't think.

[A]

I wished her one because I thought this was the first one. I thought this one was so, so special because you got all the gifts this year. You got a lot of gifts this year.

[B]

I didn't get.

[A]

No, you gave her a lot of gifts.

[B]

Oh, yeah. I get.

[A]

Why would you get gifts for Mother's Day?

[B]

Well, you said I got gifts.

[A]

You got gifts for Liv.

[B]

Oh, well, you said it. No, this is her second one.

[A]

Oh, I don't remember the first one. You must not have done much.

[B]

No, I did a great job. It was a good day. She enjoyed it. It was great. I don't know. I got, like, flowers and some gifts and stuff. Really?

[A]

That's it?

[B]

Yeah. I think I got a massage and a whole spot.

[A]

What?

[B]

A massage. You said that with an R. A massage.

[A]

You said a massage.

[B]

I got a massage.

[A]

But I. I watched a bunny get abducted on Mother's Day.

[B]

Now what? I mean, what, like, tv? Real life.

[A]

Real life. It was so, so sad. Outside of a McDonald's parking lot, a bunny was abducted. Yes.

[B]

By. By man.

[A]

By regular crows. It was insane. So me and Sarah were leaving the card shop.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

And we were driving past McDonald's and I saw, like, a bunny, like, jumping out of my peripheral, I saw a bunny jumping, and I was like, oh, there must be a bunny playing over there. But then I saw a bunch of wings going like that, and I said, bunny can't be playing with birds. Yeah, they don't go to the same school. Bunnies and birds. No.

[B]

Oh, God. That's the east side, west side.

[A]

Yeah, boy. You know, bloods and cribs.

[B]

Oh, God. Pirou.

[A]

So, okay, so Sarah literally goes, oh, my God.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

And I'm like. I'm like, what the happened? Because I'm driving, right?

[B]

I would be like, no, don't do that.

[A]

She goes, the bunny. I look over. There's two black crows. Like, one of them.

[B]

What color was the bunny?

[A]

Brown. So there's two regular, and then there's one bunny. One of the birds is flapping off the big bunny. The big bunny is trying to get around the bird that's flapping, trying to get around his equilibrium. Yeah.

[B]

He's like.

[A]

I'm like, what is the bunny trying to go get? And what is the bird trying to protect? I look a little more. The bunny's little baby was getting swallowed by the second crow. The second crow then lifts up the baby bunny flies across my. My car, and I hit the bird under my right tire. And that's a double homicide without. Without trying on Mother's Day. I mean, I put that bunny through a lot. Let's say that that bunny witnessed its child get abducted and then murdered by a cybertruck.

[B]

It is up equilibrium. The other crow was like, looks up his kid. The birds taking the. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

No, it was like how you tried to.

[B]

How you tried to hide the fact that you murdered a bunny with say. Dude, I watched it. I watched a crow abduct a bun. You're the killer.

[A]

No. Okay, well, that's. That's involuntary. I didn't. I didn't tell you to fly under my tire.

[B]

I mean, that's true.

[A]

I mean, it. I mean, it was almost, like, calculated. It took a nosedive under the front right wheel.

[B]

My baby must have just been a little thick. Baby.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Bit off more, and you could chew.

[A]

Literally. Literally.

[B]

It took that baby such. It went right into the tire. And then you said. Yeah. You said, oh, we're gonna be eating. Yeah. Straight to the tire.

[A]

And then Sarah had the gall to get mad at me. She was like, why would you do that? Why would you kill it? And I was like, what do you

[B]

want me to do? I would've Been like, get out, Liv. Walk home.

[A]

You're walking home.

[B]

Why did I kill the bunny and the bird that I didn't even know was here until you screamed like a lunatic? We'd already be on 75 right now. I'd be close to the house.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

I just want to say that's what happened as soon as we got back from New York.

[B]

That is terrible.

[A]

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[B]

A little bit.

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

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[B]

bro. Okay, Mother's Day for me. I have a story of where I went to Target. I already had all her gifts. Now it's time to get the bags. Yeah, I try to do a good job making it look clean and stuff all the same bags, right? So I'm in the bag aisle and this presumably couple, I can only assume the way they were acting, mannerism, stuff. This couple turns the corner and I'm just looking quiet and no one to talk to. They start talking and the guy literally goes, oh, God, dude. I mean, what? Why are we even getting her something for mother's Day? And the girl goes, because it's your sister. And he Goes, I mean, I know, but she's not even a mother, really. Like, it's so new. The girlfriend goes, jacob, she has two kids, and one's five years old. And he goes, I know. It's just not like.

[A]

I don't know, dude.

[B]

It's not the same. I mean, I don't even know what to get her. She was like, we're gonna get her flowers. We can get her, like, a cute gratitude journal.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And he was like, dude, that's this waste of money and time. Let's just get her a vape and call it a day.

[A]

He literally said that sounds like he knows his sister.

[B]

Oh, yeah. And I'm. And I'm just, like, going through the bags. I'm like, oh, my God.

[A]

And the cj. I absolutely just farted, by the way, I hope that picked up.

[B]

The girl's like, now, Jacob, don't do that. Like, he goes, what's all she wants anyway? She just wants to smoke her face.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And the girl goes, but that's a bad habit. We need to try to get her off that. And, you know, let's. Let's just get her something thoughtful. His very next thing. And this is where I was just like. I mean, he's either a hilarious brother.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Or he. He knows his sister. He goes, all right, follow me. Let's go to the wine. I'm just like. I mean, good.

[A]

I think, Lord, who's more right and wrong in that situation?

[B]

I think it's. I mean, it's. It's yin and yang, I think.

[A]

I don't know the situation, but I. I signed with a brother because if, you know, obviously his intentions. Like, I don't care about this at all, but if I am gonna get her a gift, I'm gonna get her a gift that I know my sister will actually like. Like, yes. The right thing to do on Mother's Day is the. Is the flowers and the cards and the diary or whatever. But isn't a gift something that the person is actually gonna like?

[B]

Okay, let's. Let's flip it. Say you and me. Say K. Rob. K. Rob's addicted to the casino.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Addicted. Bad. Like, he's down. He has horror stories. He's addicted to it.

[A]

This isn't a hypothetical, by the way.

[B]

No, I said this is hypothetical. I said this is hypothetical. Oh. He said, yeah, that's true. So he's down bad. I mean, disgustingly down. Probably. Probably gonna get a black eye next time. He goes, right. So you and me, it's his birthday. We're going to buy him gifts.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I go. And, you know, that jacket will have. You go, bro all the nonsense. Let's get him a free night at the. At the hotel, at the casino.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Let's just send to the casino.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I go, that's not right. We need to. We're trying. We're trying to wean him off. You go, that's all he cares about. That's all he really wants. He'd actually appreciate that. Right? Do you still think the same.

[A]

Yes. Is he in a position of life? We're going to the casino is ruining his life. Like, he's in debt.

[B]

We don't. I mean, that's the unknown. Because we don't know. Oh.

[A]

And if it's unknown, then that's not my responsibility. Like, it's not my responsibility. Like, if he was a crackhead, I wouldn't buy him the crack, but I'd get him a lighter. Like, I want him to have fun. It's his. It's his job to wean off the bad stuff. It's my job that my friend has fun.

[C]

I mean. I mean, the picture we paint of me is wicked. I mean, you could look at me

[B]

and know I don't do crack.

[A]

You don't have a crack build.

[B]

No. The way you drove, the way you drove into the parking lot today, gave crack.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, you. You have. You're a crackhead energy. You don't do crackheads.

[B]

You don't.

[A]

You're not a crackhead. Build, pipe, spoon, lighter. No, but I'm saying that is a good thing.

[B]

I think you're tripping.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Why? If we actively know, like, okay, to answer your question, maybe we know it's a struggle. He enjoys it, but we know it's a struggle.

[A]

Like, struggle how? Like, it's actually affecting his day to day, ruining his life.

[B]

But it's not a good how.

[A]

It just sounds like real life.

[B]

That does sound like real life. But you're aiding.

[A]

Aiding animals. No, I'm saying this happened to, like, this, like, our actual friendship. This sounds like it's happening because Robbie will tell me, like, on a Tuesday. Be like, bub, I just went to the Poker House. I'm down three grand. And then on Friday, I'll be like, you want to go to the casino? And he goes, good time. Like, that's. That's what we do.

[B]

He goes, get back or get more down.

[A]

Yeah. Robbie, am I lying?

[C]

I keep a detail of every single gambling transaction I make. And I mean that in exactly where I'm At. And it's not gambling. It's not gambling. It's calculated risk taking.

[A]

Oh, he has a problem. I mean, that's.

[B]

That's problem 100 self put you behind bars.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You have a log.

[C]

Yeah, I have a folder on my phone and it holds my spreadsheet as well as my poker app. And literally the folder is labeled calculated risk.

[A]

I mean, this is addiction 101. That's like it. That's like. That sounds like those Dallas finance bros that are like, like do eight balls all the time and they're fast food. Really, really fast food.

[B]

I literally. I practically live at Sweet Greens. Yeah. But then they go home and they're literally hitting blow.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

Okay, so now with that, is that a better addiction or a word? Is that what, coke? No. Being that like, deep dive into it where you have a folder and a spreadsheet.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Does that make it more acceptable or more like holy?

[A]

It is. I think it making it seem more professional than it is. Like, it, like, it helps you display your addiction better. Like, right. I think that's a house, like, as a front.

[B]

I'm opposite. I argue. I think that is wise. I think that's better.

[A]

Yes. Like, for people like you. Like to explain to people like you that that will help cover the front for you. Like, you're like, oh, okay, now you're making sense. Yeah. Like, for me, I can see right through that. Like, I know you're a degenerate and you have a problem.

[C]

There's. There's a difference in being in a degenerate and having a problem.

[A]

I mean, it's silver lining is like, very thin right there.

[C]

My rent to do to going and playing some poker.

[A]

Have you paid your rent playing some poker?

[B]

100%, yes. Oh, my God. That's good. Oh, my God. But okay.

[A]

I like this topic of gift giving. I'm very. I'm very new to gift giving in the fact of, like, in the new way I'm doing it.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[A]

I always. And I. It took a lot of realization for me. I'm a very selfish gift giver. I'll give somebody something that I think is cool.

[B]

Oh, my God. Yeah. Dude, don't even. Like, I can't talk because I've received some amazing gifts from.

[A]

Oh, yeah, sorry. The Rolex was bad with the first or second one. Which one?

[B]

No, that's what I'm saying. And I'm beyond grateful. But I have seen that. I know you're talking about. Yeah. You'll be like, bro, that thing's Sick. And they're like, I'd never touch this. You're like, bro, you. And you're like, all right, I'm taking it. You just take it.

[A]

Yeah. So I think that's the new thing I'm working on.

[B]

How have you changed?

[A]

I haven't, but I'm thinking about it. I'm like. I'm really starting to think about it. It's like I need to start thinking of the other person, what they want.

[B]

That's literally what a gift is.

[A]

Yeah, that's what I'm realizing. But it took some time to understand that because. Because I have to look. For most people, I have to look below what I think is cool.

[C]

No, he's a terrible receiver of a gift. Just. Just two days ago, I gave him something that I know he could use, would be beneficial to him, and he makes you feel bad for giving him a gift. Okay, It's a cologne that I know he could use. And I was like, hey, this is a cheaper version of what you. What you purchase normally.

[B]

Oh, you said his buzzword. You killed it.

[C]

Hold on.

[B]

It'd be great. We're going on tour.

[C]

And I give it to him. And instead of him being like, oh, thanks, brother.

[B]

Appreciate it.

[C]

He goes, oh, you must be rich.

[A]

I mean, you're just giving me something like, oh.

[C]

And I was like, Peyton, Peyton, it's $30. And he goes, more than what I got.

[B]

You know what I'm saying? Or you give him a nice gift,

[C]

and he goes, oh, man, you shouldn't have spent that much on me.

[B]

Just take the gift. Just take it.

[A]

First of all, the cologne thing, he just.

[B]

He.

[A]

He's saying that story backwards. First of all, he violated my personal space. Like, he know how he gets too close. Robbie has a close problem. Like, he gets way too in your.

[C]

I. I do.

[A]

Yeah. So first of all, he just breaks it in my house.

[B]

Where you going after that, old Cubs?

[A]

First of all, you're pending a lawsuit for that.

[B]

Where are you going?

[A]

So we. I'm in my. I'm in my house. I'm in my office, right? I hear the door open. I'm like, no one's supposed to be here. No one supposed to be coming.

[B]

Incorrect.

[A]

Yeah. I hear the door, and I just. I hear. I know his waddle. I hear him coming down the hallway, and he comes in, and he's just in my office. Now I'm working, right? And he has this big bottle of cologne. Doesn't say hi to me. He goes, let me spray this on you.

[B]

I go, what? The.

[A]

And by the way, I had just showered. I just put on my cologne. That's not even. Hey, Peyton.

[C]

That is indeed what happened.

[A]

That is insane,

[B]

dude. I can't. I can see that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

He goes, hold on, let me get some. Yeah. Yeah. That's exactly what he did. Hey, not, hey, can I be in your home?

[A]

Yeah. Nothing.

[B]

Hey, let me get.

[A]

He goes, let me spray this on you. And I go, what the. I'm like, no. I'm like, no, Robbie, no.

[B]

Literally 10 seconds before that, no one was in your house. No one was with. These are doing whatever you're doing, and now you're getting sprayed from cold.

[A]

And then I go, no. He goes, don't be like that. Do not.

[B]

Come on, Bob. Just like.

[A]

He goes, do not be like that. He goes, I'm trying to do something for you. And I go, I don't want it.

[B]

Right?

[A]

I don't want cologne on me. I have my own cologne. He goes, you're not going to regret it. Can you trust me with something? Like, you always look down on me. And then I go, robbie, I go, okay, here. I have this piece of paper sprayed on here, like. And then I can smell it on there.

[B]

He goes, it ain't the same, bub.

[A]

He goes, no, find a spot. We don't find a spot.

[B]

Give me some skin. You're gonna get anosmic if you put it on the paper.

[A]

And then this mother turns around. And he goes, just look at the spray on it. And is spraying like 10 sprays.

[B]

He goes, oh, Bob, tell me that's not a God dang atomizer. Oh, my. That's exactly what he said.

[A]

So my whole room smells like this cologne.

[B]

Oh, did it smell good?

[A]

No, it smelled great. Okay. And then I go, dude, that does smell good. And he goes, and you let me spray it on you. Let me.

[B]

Come on, take your clothes off.

[A]

And then I'm like, no, no. And he goes, well, you can have it. And I go, what? And he goes, yeah, you can have it. I just bought it. I just bought it to smell it. See what it was like? So you didn't buy it for me. You bought it to smell it. And then you said you didn't want it, and I was like, you don't want it? And he goes, no, I just bought it because I wanted to smell it.

[C]

Actually, incorrect. I didn't tell you. I ordered that months ago for your birthday, and it just now came in.

[A]

Now, you didn't tell me that.

[C]

Yeah, because it is a dupe of your favorite cologne.

[B]

I will gladly take it, by the way. Is it, Is it. I, I'm just in my.

[A]

It's in my bathroom.

[B]

Okay. Is it Chiaka Snow? It's.

[C]

It is.

[B]

Yep. I knew it.

[A]

Yep.

[C]

Just off and so I, I. And actually I went to links to the point where I reached out to a local influencer and he was going to give me a bottle of it.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

But I was like, man, I already ordered it. Like, it will get here. It finally came in. I was giving it to you. I didn't, I didn't preface that. I knew you would just appreciate it. But somehow I'm the bad guy for giving you. Oh, you must be rich.

[B]

Oh, just giving me a bottle of cologne.

[A]

No, I said the must be rich thing after he said, oh, I just bought it to smell it.

[B]

Yeah, that's a you must be rich line.

[A]

Yeah. I can't lie. I love you.

[C]

You can't go sample it. These aren't things you can just go sample. You have to buy them. You gotta buy to try.

[B]

He goes, I bought those tennies just to touch them a little bit, see how they feel on the foot. You can have them.

[A]

Okay. I mean, that's. That's funny. That's funny as hell. You should know. Podcast this episode is brought to you by Stamze. Come on now. We all get the same 168 hours in a week. So how much of that time are you spend mailing? With stamps.com you can get those hours back. We all want our hours back. It's like having a post office right at your desk or wherever you are. You can send them what you need when you need or wherever you need without a hassle.

[B]

You heard the man. Mail what you want, when you want, wherever you are.

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That is what I said.

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[B]

Hit me with it.

[A]

So this is the question I thought of this weekend, and I was in the car with Sarah.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

Now, GPS might be the most impressive piece of technology that's ever existed.

[B]

Insane, isn't it?

[A]

It is un. Unfathomable how smart GPS is.

[B]

No, you're. It's like spooky level.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Yours is different.

[A]

So this is what happened, right? And this is what really made me think of it.

[B]

Right.

[A]

First of all, the mapping out of gps. Whoever took the time to put all that in there is insane. Oh, yeah. Like, whoever put all the street signs in there, all the restaurants, all the red lights. Whoever did that, you deserve a medal of honor.

[B]

Everything.

[A]

Like a purple heart, some.

[B]

Well, no. Something hot up there. Not the purple heart Salute. Yeah. West side Piru Piru. Crips, Bloods, and everything in between Hoovers. I go, I absolutely am getting affiliated. So. Okay, you dare. Wouldn't want to see me in a dark alley. I'd be like, here, take it all. Take it all.

[A]

Like you forgot something.

[B]

Dude, honestly, my car keys. Here you go, bro.

[A]

Let me call my wife. She'll bring some from the house.

[B]

She'll just wire to you. Love you, babe.

[A]

Okay. She's not watching, so be honest. I could literally say whatever I want right now, and she will never see it. Dude, I don't like Liv's tow hair.

[B]

She's never gonna see it.

[A]

She's not gonna see it.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Anyway, so GPS is unfathomable. The way that the reason I thought about this is because me and Sarah were in the car, right? And we were going to a restaurant. The restaurant was a little far out, right. And I've never been here. So I went to my car and

[B]

I typed in the address.

[A]

Now, it said it was going to take 33 minutes to get there. That's very specific. So, first of all, impressive enough. How do you know that?

[B]

Yeah, I've literally always thought that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

How the hell do you. Because it should be. Like, GPS is too advanced almost.

[A]

It's crazy because this. This is what made me think of it. We're going, we're driving a little bit, but, like, 10 minutes into the drive, we hit an ungodly amount of traffic. Yes. When I say, like, like bumper to bumper, hella red lights, park type traffic. Bad. But the time never went up for the destination to get there. It never went up. So that means this GPS knew I was gonna be at this red light with this much traffic.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

At this time.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

How the did you know, that's.

[B]

Dude, it's witchcraft. No, it's not. That's not easy.

[A]

Like, my whole thing is like, what if I decided to change one lane? What if I decided to go to the left lane?

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

How does it know that?

[B]

Dude, that I've. I've always thought about that. Because you can. You can do like simple math. Yeah, Right.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

This spot is where you live. This spot is seven miles away.

[A]

Right.

[B]

These are the roads you take. This is how long it should take with the local speed limits. Right. How do you know. How do you know this light is on four way stop mode. How do you know that these people. How do you know when people crash? How does it know when people. But this is like, there's user reports.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Who's doing that? This is your highway on work.

[A]

This is even crazier.

[B]

Right.

[A]

How does it know what speed limit I'm gonna go at? What if I decide to actually just go the speed limit? Who actually does that? We always go a little bit over. We're in Texas. But it's accounting for that. Like, it knew I was gonna go a little bit over the speed limit to make it in 33 minutes. What if I decided to go the speed limit?

[B]

What if you decided to go slower? What is happened? Like, how does it. What if it was a scenic view

[A]

type of GPS is more impressive than AI technology. Like, it is. It is like. No, no, no. Like the fun to the fundamental use, the daily use of gps so over.

[B]

So underappreciated and over.

[A]

It's like the doorknob gps. Like, no one appreciates gps.

[B]

Way better than old knob.

[A]

Yeah. So I'm saying, well.

[B]

Oh, way better than.

[A]

Okay, like the wheel. I would. I would put GPS up there with the wheel. Like, you don't understand how much you need a wheel until you don't have a wheel.

[B]

See? Okay, but this is what I'm saying to. And now this. Now this might be controversial. The wheel, one of the greatest inventions ever. Yeah, but it's like, it's. I hate to say this, it's. It was kind of like obvious. Like you kind of needed something like that. It's like, oh, we're dragging all this so heavy. What can I make that can make this easier? Right? And some guy was like, ah, some round that just goes and goes and goes crazy. And it's like, okay, the wheel, it's incredible. But who sat down and thought, let's make gps. Let's send something to space. Yeah. To where it gets all this. And it Tells me what right hand turn I need to make to get to Lowe's.

[A]

And that gonna reroute me. And sometimes you can have the Jonas Brothers voiceover. Or maybe Barney.

[B]

Oh my God, are you crazy?

[A]

But you know what GPS has been

[B]

around for so long? The old school little garments.

[A]

Dude, the thing is, this is getting crazier. Who did we talk about this in our personal lives or on the podcast? Who invented the stairs, dude.

[B]

Still, I don't remember. I think it might.

[A]

Was that personal life we didn't talk about on here? It was on the pod.

[C]

Yeah, I think it might have been on the Patreon because we talked about like, how is there even like a second story? And then who. Who thought of stairs?

[A]

Yeah, like, who decided I want to go up?

[B]

Like, but genuinely, who said, ah, we made a house. Let's just do it again right on top of us.

[C]

Yeah, I don't know anybody where land was a restriction. You can't go left, right, front, back.

[B]

You gotta go up. This is. Is thousands of years ago. This. Thousands of years ago. They have stairs in the Roman Coliseum. Like, who thought we should go higher, not wider?

[A]

Yeah, it's. It is. It is impressive. What were you saying about gps?

[C]

That that's less impressive than you're making it.

[A]

Why?

[C]

Like the. The time adjustment. It's all just a data collection of everybody else that's using the same gps.

[A]

Did you hear that?

[B]

Wait, what was that?

[A]

Oh, do you hear that?

[B]

No, I can't. It's a little faint. I kind of hear it now though.

[A]

It's the dry enough.

[B]

It's all. It's just a data collection. Just a data collection of reallocated sources. That's third party testing. Not funded by the government. It's open source, so they keep their heads algorithmic.

[A]

AR mic.

[B]

They know what red light you're going to turn in. All right.

[A]

No, but gps. GPS is fundamentally like insane.

[B]

No, the part. Okay, the part that I think to piggyback even though we just completely roasted him. It is a data collection. That's the. I don't like what? Data collecting, bro.

[A]

They know your intestines.

[B]

They know everything about.

[A]

Yeah, I don't care.

[B]

Have you seen. Okay, have you seen the simplest of videos where people. I've literally watched a YouTube video where a man, the whole video made a new TikTok, like on a new device. Made a new TikTok from scratch. Yeah, and then time lapse it. Granted, there can obviously be some cheating in there, but he seemed like he was doing this for Scientific, like, purposes.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

So he just talked and talked and talked about, is it a dog food or cat food? Okay. Something like that. And you just talk with the phone locked.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And just talk. Oh, I need to feed my dog. I wonder what dog food. Like, just literally feeding it dog food. Yeah. Dog food ads. Yes.

[A]

No, it's 100% listening to. It's a known thing. Yeah.

[B]

That's not even hidden. That's a known thing.

[A]

I remember when it was first, like, it question, like, whatever, Instagram ads were starting to pop up, and now it's just, like, known like that.

[B]

But that train of thought makes me think, like, bro, I. I genuinely feel like every TV in my house.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

My. My. My Alexa, my phones.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I think everything. I don't. That's an ear. When you really think about that, that is an eerie feeling.

[A]

See, I. You're. It's so different for me. Like, I used to love it when I was single because it's like, how does my Explore page know exactly the kind of woman I like? Like, it was like, to the key. Like, not. Not even a single thing outside of my type. Like, it was. It was another one.

[B]

Another one.

[A]

And I was like. And I was like, I'm about to go to. I'm about to go to Miami. It's like, oh, they're right there in my. Like, it's like. It's like, how did it know, dude,

[B]

what I was looking for? It's insane. It's insane. And I used to love it like that. I don't like that, bro. I. I. You know, I recently thought about getting, like, an old foot. Like a burner phone.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Now I can't.

[A]

Like, I was coming back in style.

[B]

I would keep. Not even style just for. To kind of like, like. But I think I just watched too many shows like that. Yeah, I watched too many, like, Like Homelands and, like, Secrecy Night Agents and stuff like that.

[A]

I was thinking about buying a flip phone again, but you know how you used to type on there? You have to hit. Like, to get to see. You'd have to hit two, three times.

[B]

Dude, wasn't that called T9 texting?

[A]

Oh, I don't remember, but it was like, I was so fast at it. I remember I was so good at it. And I tried to do it again the other day, and I was so disappointed in myself how bad I was with it.

[B]

It's bad.

[A]

And I don't know how to spell banana. And spelling banana on that is puzzling. I mean, it is a. It is magnificently. Hard to smell banana on an old phone.

[B]

I haven't even thought about that. Oh, my God. Dude, that used to be. We used to have T9 TechSofts in school. It was like the first version of like a words per minute test. We put like a prompt up and two dudes would have to text against each other. I was a loser. Yeah, let's just put that out there. I was a loser.

[A]

We're having pissing competitions.

[B]

Oh, we had that too. Until one kid tried to jump streams. And you talk about extremes.

[A]

What does that mean? Like jump over people paying two dudes

[B]

who could go as far back. Yeah. And keep the piss in the urinal. Yeah. And one kid thought it was double dutch. Started jumping over their urine.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I literally said, I'm never coming to this again. Yeah.

[A]

He was white.

[B]

I bought my ticket and everything. I was like, I'm not coming to this.

[A]

Okay. You should know podcast. This episode is brought to you by Revolve. You know when something pops up last minute and you need an outfit that just works?

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

Oh, my God. Okay, so this happens in my house. This is a very vital and important question I'm going to ask you. This happens in My house, quite literally every single night.

[A]

Okay, Okay.

[B]

I need to set the mood. And then it's a simple question. And depending on what you answer, I'm either going to absolutely kill you or we're going to rejoice.

[A]

Your house is absolutely too loud, by the way. Can I put that out there? If I had to do like a Yelp review. House is too loud.

[B]

I mean, baby Liv, if Liv's mom's there. Need earbuds.

[A]

No, no. It's like, I love visiting your house whenever, like all lives sides over there. But, like, I'm gonna have a migraine by the time.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Malachi's literally screaming Lolly. The loudest voice ever. Live loud as hell. You just click clap, dude. It's like.

[B]

I'm like, what's up, guys?

[A]

What do you want now? His house is literally like. You take a psychedelic. Yeah. It's like a naked baby running around.

[B]

He's like, oh.

[A]

Oh, yeah. It's like.

[B]

It's like my back. Lolly's just going.

[A]

Just tablet watches and I'm just like. Submarines. I mean, there's everything out there. What was your question?

[B]

Okay. Very important how you answer this.

[A]

Yeah. Does Gabe still like me?

[B]

So every.

[A]

He did. He was weird on the phone. I'm not gonna lie. Yeah, he was.

[B]

Yeah, because I'm doing your own thing.

[A]

Yeah, but you showed him the phone or in the. Because I was on the FaceTime. And normally he's like, ah, Uncle P. He goes up. He moved on. I was like, bro, maybe he was pressed.

[B]

You didn't come and say, what's up?

[A]

Didn't invite me.

[B]

I didn't invite anybody. It wasn't an invited thing.

[A]

Okay, sorry. Here we go.

[B]

So every night, me and Liv's routine is we get into bed once. Once Bubba's down, we get in bed, we watch a show, we watch a movie sometimes something that is our us time. It is sacred.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Now, every night, one of us falls asleep first. Now, there's two vastly different, different ways we fall asleep. Okay, Say we're watching a show with you and your significant partner are watching a show, right? And one of you is about to get tired. Do you finish the episode then turn the TV off? Or do you just turn it off right where you're at and you fall asleep? Okay, first of all, cuz this is polarizing. And me and live legitimately got in an argument over this.

[A]

First of all, you got to finish the episode. You have to finish the episode. You have to finish the episode. There's.

[B]

I Mean, if I am tired, why am I trying to stay awake through an episode?

[A]

Cam that how you turn it off?

[B]

Okay. What? I'm literally fighting my sleep. I don't. I'm not gonna remember what happened.

[A]

Okay, that's user. That's user error because you shouldn't even started the episode then. That's selfish.

[B]

Like the third episode. It's not. I hit the bed and I'm sorry. You've definitely 100%, but we're on the third episode.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Why am I finishing it? Why are you starting live does the same.

[A]

Are you starting it then? That's. That's so selfish. And that's a lack of like. And you just said, that's y'. All. Sacred time. That's you and your partner. Sacred time is watching a show together,

[B]

trying to extend it as much. I was not tired at the beginning. You know, Homeland, These episodes are 50 minutes.

[A]

They're long episodes.

[B]

When I hit the 20, 25 minute mark, oh, all of a sudden my left eyes close and I've really sunk down in the bed. It's time to go.

[A]

That's probably the most selfish thing you could do is turn it off. Because what if we're at a climactic part or the storyline is developing.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Storyline is doing good, and then you're just like, dude, I'm not really feeling it anymore. And then I'm just here blue balled, seeing if Carrie is gonna make it out.

[B]

Okay, Carrie's gonna make it out. She might have to go through. She's gonna make it out. But my thing is, it is our sacred time. We watch this together. Right?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

If I express. And the thing is, is it can go the opposite way if Liv gets tired. Oh, let's cut it off.

[A]

Fine, I'll scroll. Let me take it to a different example. Say we're having sexy time. Me and you, me and Payton and camera having sexy time. I'm out there getting a firm grasp on it with a little bit of wiggle on it. Now you're feeling good. We've done this for, like, great.

[B]

It's like 30, about 40 seconds.

[A]

Yeah, I've done it for like a minute straight. And you're into it now. And then I'm like, nah, I'm tired.

[B]

That is absolutely nowhere near watching Netflix.

[A]

Oh, dude, there's a playoff game. Yes, there is. Oh, my God. If you're doing it during a live event, that's crazy. That's a once in a lifetime thing. Like, you're. You're the only person that is Seeing this at this specific time. This. There's no for sure outcome of this.

[B]

Okay, Netflix a show or a movie? My whole thing is. What? Tell me if this is not sound logic.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

If I'm falling, like, actively falling asleep. Yeah. And then there's half an episode left. Okay, Liv's gonna finish it, then turn it off. I wake up, I go, what the hell? Did you finish it? She goes, yeah, we were watching it. And I go, all right, good night. We go to sleep tomorrow night when it's sacred time. I have to catch up.

[A]

No, no.

[B]

You think I'm just skipping episode eight and going to nine?

[A]

No, but it's.

[B]

I didn't see it. I have to catch up now. We're wasting time since.

[A]

No, you're wasting time since you. No, no, no. Since you fell asleep. No, it's my turn to talk.

[B]

We cut it off.

[A]

My turn to talk.

[B]

It's my turn. If it's my turn. We cut it off, right when someone's about to lose it. It. Then guess what? All you do is pick up where you left off.

[A]

You're thinking about yourself, though. I'm saying, if it's your choice to turn off, if you want to go to sleep, it is your responsibility to catch up before. It is our. Our scheduled time to watch the show. We cannot go backwards.

[B]

You think I have free time to watch Carrie Matheson in the piss middle of the day? Oh, that's adorable. That's the only time I watch TV is at night with my wife.

[A]

That's your fault. Wake up earlier. It's like getting to the gym.

[B]

If you and Sarah are watching TV, wake up. I'm gonna set a 5:30 alarm to watch Carrie Mathis.

[A]

If that's your special time, then yes, as a good husband, that's your responsibility. That's selfish. That's like. It's like.

[B]

It's more selfish if I wake up to watch TV instead of sleep and rejuvenate, because the Lord knows I'm gonna need all of that energy that I just recouped. All of it. If you and Sarah are watching a show and she's about to fall asleep,

[A]

she's not allowed to. She's not allowed. That's. To put that out there.

[B]

You.

[A]

It's like if you're. First of all, I tell her.

[B]

I tell her you're.

[A]

Whenever we go up to our. Whenever we go to the theater, and she's like, let's watch the show. I'm like, okay, if you are not allowed to get on your phone One. That's. I say rules.

[B]

That's a good rule.

[A]

No, no, no, no. No phone, no sleeps. If I catch you doing either one of these things. Now, this is an independent date. You cannot. You cannot have a say so when I watch this show.

[B]

All right, Adolph, you know, call me

[A]

what you want, but you can't call me not having fun.

[B]

No, that's. I can call you strict in jail.

[A]

No, that is communicative. That is being honest.

[B]

That's saying, hey, Prisoner 412, phone down, no sleep. Watch the show.

[A]

Yes. I literally tell her, no sleepies. That's our thing. No sleepies.

[B]

But sleep, okay. Phone is something you can control if I am watching.

[A]

You control your sleep, too.

[B]

Dude, you're about to make me actually mad. If I had a long day, right? I set in an hour and a half getting to work, an hour and a half coming back. We did a great day here. I walk into a naked kid screaming, dada. And he's going crazy. I play with him. And I've already watched two hours of the show with you, and I go for a third because you're still awake, and I get tired. I don't think I should be chastised for it.

[A]

But you're also, like, 32. You look it. You're also a grown man, Cam, So that means you should know, hey, if I try to start another episode, I'm probably going to fall asleep in the middle of it, so let's just not start an episode. How about you be an adult, dude?

[B]

No, no. You're. You're literally about to piss me off. Dude.

[A]

That is.

[B]

That is so comparable.

[A]

Am I wrong?

[B]

That's so comparable to the NBA. That is so comparable to the NBA.

[A]

You. What?

[B]

You just. I don't like this, what you just said. I'm trying to give live more time and go as far as I can. You basically just said, I'd rather not make the playoffs than lose in the second round. That's what you said. Because I'm trying to start the third round because I'm attempting to finish it and go hard, and I fall asleep and I fall short.

[A]

You know, that's like.

[B]

You should have the wherewithal to not even start the third episode.

[A]

No, that's like being like, oh, we're

[B]

not going to win the ring, so we should. We shouldn't even make the postseason.

[A]

That's. That's a false comparison. That's such a false comparison.

[B]

Comparison.

[A]

That's like saying, oh, I want to make it, but I'm just going To. I know I'm going to quit in the middle of the season, but I'm still going to be. Be on the team. I know I'm going to quit, but I'm going to. That's. That's the comparison.

[B]

No, that's. I know I'm going to lose. Falling asleep while watching shows. Losing. That's not quitting.

[A]

That's literally quitting. It's.

[B]

I'm quitting falling asleep.

[A]

You said you turn it off.

[B]

Turning it off because I'm falling asleep.

[A]

Why are you turning it off if she's still watching?

[B]

Because I'm not. Cuz you're selfish and it's our sacred time.

[A]

It's your sacred time.

[B]

I have to catch up tomorrow night.

[A]

It's all right. You're tripping, dude. You're selfish, dude. No wonder Li calls.

[B]

You can't be that selfish live. What? What'd you say on your stupid little breath? Little poke, Pikachu, Pokemon watch. What'd you say? You said, no wonder Liv calls you. When did she call you?

[A]

She calls Sarah to talk to me.

[B]

She does not call Sarah to talk to you. Get out of here. You're an absolute liar.

[A]

I don't talk to Liv. Yeah, I call her a derogatory name and keep it going.

[B]

Yeah, you do.

[A]

Dude, I think you're jealous that your son says my name more than he says yours.

[B]

He spit, dude. He spams your name. Like, spams it. It used to be any. Okay, it's to the point. Anytime I make a FaceTime, he goes P.E. he always does that because he just assumes it's gonna be you. I'll literally call my mom, Ryan, C.J. like K, Rob, anybody. He goes P.E. he does that? Yeah.

[A]

It's my dog.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

He loves.

[B]

He loves you. He loves your name.

[A]

He gives me that look. He goes, yeah.

[B]

He goes, yeah, dude. His two front teeth are finally coming in. Hillbilly. Oh, dude. Look like Courage the cowardly dog.

[A]

Yeah, it's fantastic.

[B]

Bad. Oh, speak, dude. Okay, honestly, I'm sharing this for the pure just self humiliation. Okay? This is an absolute just aura log story of me. That's it.

[A]

I didn't know you had much to lose.

[B]

Yeah, Yeah, I don't think I have any after this. Yeah, I'm going to McDonald's. This was actually after work. It was a long day. It's so good, right? You know, it's here and there. It's fantastic. I'm going to McDonald's. I am literally starving. I'm literally like, like that type of hungry you look at your dog a certain way, you're just like, oh, wow.

[A]

I've never been that hungry.

[B]

I've been that hungry. Well, you're sorry you got some meat, Ruby. Like that hungry, right? I get to the McDonald's, I go through the drive thru. A couple cars in front of me. I'm waiting. I get up to the window. The guy at my McDonald's knows me. I go, hey, what's up, bro? He goes, oh, how's it going? Da da, da. He hands me my food. I immediately entered like a different world. I completely forgot there's cars behind me, that I'm in a drive through line. And I started eating my food right at the window, Cameron. And I swear on everything.

[A]

How long did it take you to realize, bro?

[B]

He knocked on the, on the glass again. No. He hands me the bag. I take the Powerade, I set it in my cup holder, I put the bag in my right seat and I start mowing fries. Mowing fries. Oh.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

It gets this story, by the way. There's at least two more parts that are way worse than that.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

This is all in one interaction. Oh.

[A]

Eyes are closed.

[B]

Eyes are closed. I mean, I'm in a different world. And I cheer and I go. I look at him. He goes, are you missing something? He thinks I'm missing something. And it hit me like, like, like I was like, oh my God. I was like, oh my God. I'm just eating my food right here. I was like, bro, I'm so sorry. I was just super hungry. I go to peel off, I'd put my car in park. I go to peel off, my car's in park. I just go, oh, I'm revving. So now that's even more embarrassing. The guy's like, he's like, hey, are you okay, bro? I was like, yeah, I'm fine. He didn't drive.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I'm already at like 3,000 rpm. So I go take off. I have to like slam my brake because right when that happened, a car turned in.

[A]

Oh, Cam.

[B]

It got to the point I said, dude, I can't even go home right now. I said, I need a minute. Like I need to chill out for a second. Yeah. I go to park in a parking spot.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That is on the side, like the little side street of the drive thru.

[A]

Right.

[B]

So that same drive thru guy can see me.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I go to park in this driving spot parking spot in my new car. You know, it's big.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I don't realize how big it is. I Hit the little city at the bottom.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

And when I talk about my whole

[A]

car said, dude, you're the worst driver ever.

[B]

And guess. Guess who's looking at me. I check my rear view, I look at the window, and he's literally like this. He just looks like he's sad for me. He goes. And I was just like, I. I was so embarrassed. Like, I could feel myself getting hot. Oh, my God. I was like, I just did the. The lamest ever.

[A]

Yeah, he probably thought you were high. Oh, because you're closing your eyes.

[B]

Smacking, chewing slow.

[A]

You're staying there. Yeah. Why are you so hungry, bro?

[B]

I think it was. I. I want to say it was a day we were up here, and I didn't eat the lunch. Like, I didn't eat lunch. I had, like, a bar or something. And the traffic, of course, was like, an hour 45. Yeah. So by the time I got home, it was already, like, dinner time. I told Liv, like, hey, you don't even cook. I'll pick us up food. That's another thing. I have my son and wife's food in the car. I decided to eat now. That speaks to my selfishness.

[A]

I think we're starting to really realize how selfish you could be at times.

[B]

I was dying hungry.

[A]

You should know podcast. This episode is brought to you by Kiwi Biosciences. You ever go out to eat and feel stressed or disappointed? Cam, I know you don't really are often disappointed. You like a lot of food, but because you know you can't enjoy the foods you love without worrying about how you feel afterward. Do you have that?

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

Phodzyme is a tasteless powder you sprinkle right into your food. It helps break down your fodmaps, the hard to digest components in food that can cause bloating, gas, and pain before they cause discomfort. Guys, we've all been there. No one enjoys it. Use your Phodzyme, dude.

[A]

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[B]

And there's an added bonus. Many people report feeling more confident and relaxed around food after using Fodzyme.

[A]

Dude, I would. I would love to go out and have some bar food without bloating or gas or any discomfort afterward. Fodzyme. That's the place to be, 100%. We're so excited to partner with Fodzyme and offer you 30% off your first order when you go to icaneatagain.com YSK that's I can eat again.com YSK for 30% off your first order. Finally, you can enjoy your favorite foods without the pain. Just go to icanneatain.com now on to the rest of the episode. Okay, so as you know, me and Cam have been talking about opening, like, cars recently. We've been really into card rips. Yes. So our friends at Orbit Sports Cards saw us talking about and they're like, hey, we have some of these Bowman packs, which are fantastic packs. Like, you can pull like exclusive, like high serialized. Yeah.

[B]

And fantastic.

[A]

So what you're looking for is autographed or numbered cards.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Right. So they sent us packs and we said we will rip them on camera. So hopefully y' all are into this, if not 100%.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

You know, sorry. But then we're gonna. You're gonna see us.

[B]

Have fun. Shout out Orbit.

[A]

Shout out Orbit Sports cards.

[B]

All right.

[A]

Gonna go.

[B]

All right. Now the real question is. The real question is, how jealous are you gonna be when mine hits and you don't?

[A]

It's not gonna happen. I felt my n. All right, in the comments right now, put. Who you think is going to. To pull a card? Okay. I hope we, like, both pull something. I hope we both or at least one of us.

[B]

So the question is, are we going same time?

[A]

Just go ahead. We'll split it down the thing. 50.

[B]

50. Okay. Dylan Harmer. Russell. I mean, I mean, you're struggling over there.

[A]

I'm like, shaking, bro. Okay, Got Nas, Reed, Reptilian.

[B]

Yep, he's winning off rip. I have a. I have a Will Richard rookie card.

[A]

You gotta go faster than that, Cam. I mean, we got two packs here.

[B]

I was looking two boxes.

[A]

Two boxes, like eight packs.

[B]

Oh, I will.

[A]

I'll.

[B]

I'll speed.

[A]

Okay, now you gotta appreciate. Oh, we got a Bailey's highlight reel Shop.

[B]

Ace Bailey Rockstar Rookie.

[A]

I got an Ace Bailey.

[B]

Which one's better?

[A]

Highlight, real shot. I don't.

[B]

Look here. I don't. I don't mind.

[A]

All right.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Okay. Okay.

[B]

So that's the time. That's the top for me so far. It's top for me so far.

[A]

Pack three. Pack three. Here we go.

[B]

You know, it's always about the steady. The steady race. Oh, we got. We got a little. We got a little Christian Anderson Bowman Chrome, first edition from Texas Techie. Texas Techie.

[A]

I got a Walton Clayton Jr. Rookie card.

[B]

I got a Sadiq White and a Zakiyah Johnson. I just like saying the name. Okay.

[A]

I just like saying their name. All right.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

We haven't pulled much yet.

[B]

I'm much, but. But there's all. That's the whole point.

[A]

The point.

[B]

All right, here we go. Because when you do. Oh, it feels like. I mean, it just feels like you're absolutely bungee jumping. Oh, I got a talent tracker. A Darren Peterson. Very good player. I don't know about the card. This is a. This is fantastic. This guy. Talent tracker. Look at this giddy.

[A]

Oh, it's literally Cam.

[B]

Is it? Who is it?

[A]

I don't know what his name is. Joe Gaharovich.

[B]

Joe Gahargovich. Yeah.

[A]

Okay. Okay.

[B]

I got another decent one.

[A]

Last. Oh, I got two more packs in here. Jesus, there's a lot of packs in these.

[B]

Okay, got a rip. We got a rip. Who's gonna do. Who can go faster? I can go fast. A young. Young Kings. Luca Doncic. Card.

[A]

Oh, no. He might be on a heater. Oh, my God. He might be on a heater. Oh, no. He might be on a heater.

[B]

I might be on a heater.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

Lucas. Six, eight, two, three, zero.

[A]

Wait, let me see it.

[B]

Little young.

[A]

That looks like a good hard. I don't know much about that, but it looks like a good card.

[B]

Looks like a good one. It's not numbered. It's not auto, but it. Look, it looks fancy and I Fancy. Lucas.

[A]

I mean, my hands are shaking, dude. I got. Now. Now that he pulled that, you know,

[B]

you get too invested. Like, you get, like you are, like, in there. In there.

[A]

Okay, so Cam might be winning now.

[B]

Take me through there. Taking me through the. I got a verified Emily Skinner from Duke. What does that mean, Verified?

[A]

Go. Sienna Bess.

[B]

Okay, there we go. Put that on the little side.

[A]

I mean, I'm not pulling yet.

[B]

You said what. What's.

[A]

What's the. Luke. Oh, before you write, what's the Luca value?

[C]

One Luca value ungraded $99.

[A]

Okay. All right, all right.

[B]

I got a first edition to Bowman Chrome. Caleb Foster from Duke. Okay, here we go.

[A]

Here we go.

[B]

You know what? Have some faith, people. Have some faith.

[A]

I'm. I'm starting to slowly lose faith.

[B]

No, you're not. Verified. Sienna bet. How am I gonna tell you you're losing faith? Verified Sienna Betts.

[A]

Okay, I'm on my last couple here, buddy.

[B]

You sound like you're going just through it.

[A]

Yeah. Shout out to orbit. Y' all really did. Big one here.

[B]

I'm feeling. I'm feeling it right here.

[A]

What is this Allen.

[B]

What? Rookie of the year favorites. It's in a little shape of a flag. It's. I don't know, though.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

It looks. I mean, absolutely.

[A]

Show the camera.

[B]

Colin Murray Boyles.

[A]

I mean, I've never seen a card that looks like that.

[B]

I never heard of Murray Boyles.

[A]

Can you look up this card right here? The Allen Iverson.

[B]

Ooh. Terrence Reed from UConn.

[A]

Now I'm getting smoked right now. You got a card that looked like a flag.

[B]

Yeah, I got another rookie. A CEON James.

[A]

I thought for a second you said you pulled a Cooper. I was be like, oh, dude, super quick.

[B]

Cj, cut this out. Do you want to do the fake one? You have to, like, fake like you

[A]

hit some crazy now. Let's just finish it out, and then we'll see.

[B]

Okay. All right.

[A]

Dude, if I get another

[B]

Darren Peterson, which is obviously he's gonna be a rookie. This is at Kansas. This is a vip. Very important prospects. Darren Peterson. I have two more packs left. Orbit vip.

[A]

They said they're not mad if they. If we pull, like, some, like, a bad card there. They don't care. All right, we got another Reptilian. Sebastian Wilkins.

[B]

I haven't got a Reptilian.

[A]

No, it doesn't matter. You got one that looks like a flag. That is true.

[B]

I don't know what that means. Okay, we're on second. Last one for your boy.

[A]

Ooh, Drake, pal.

[B]

Some Bowman chrome. Little greatness loading rookie card.

[A]

What's going on, bro? I'm not. I'm Literally haven't pulled anything.

[B]

Oh, that one's nice.

[A]

I'm not having fun. I'm like the kid on Christmas. What?

[B]

What?

[A]

What? What? What? What?

[B]

What?

[A]

What? What?

[B]

What? I literally think I'm. I'm serious. I think I'm holding a Cooper flag.

[A]

Rookie on him. I swear to God. Holy. No way.

[B]

Oh, what the. What the.

[C]

Do you got a sleeve?

[A]

You have a sleeve?

[B]

We need a sleeve for this?

[A]

We didn't bring any sleeves, bro.

[C]

Here, let me go set it over there.

[A]

No, no, no.

[B]

Allegiance to the flag.

[A]

Oh, Mike. Somebody look up the value of that. Somebody look up the value back there.

[B]

There.

[A]

Oh, turn the mic on. Turn the mic on. What's the value of that?

[B]

I'm not. I'm not. I'm just holding. I'm just holding this. I'm just holding this.

[C]

It's Bowman 20, 26.

[B]

It's a. Oh, my God. This is get.

[A]

It's a rookie auto. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[B]

Oh, my God, it's coupe Cooper flag centering looks. I can't tell on these, cuz it's

[C]

not like a ungraded right now. Going for 1100. I'm not seeing, but they're saying potentially graded could be, like, over four.

[B]

He's no. He's no. Oh. Oh. Super quick. He's such a good guy, though. He's such a good. I mean, he absolutely wants to punch me in the face right now.

[A]

Hey, can I say wait? Let me see it. Let me see it. You want. I can't hold it. I don't know. I don't want to hold it because it's. It's fake. There's no such thing as Orbit sports cards. We resealed that back. K. K, Rob signed. You're not holding any value there.

[B]

There's nothing in there. I. I sure was wondering. I was like, dude, it's not even sparkly. And I was like, this work on his pen. How you reseal it?

[A]

We went to Kohl's and bought, like, a heat reseal.

[B]

Oh, dude. Straight up, y'. All. Oh, my God.

[A]

We got. You got one more bag. Hey, you know, it'd be the funniest is I open my last bag and I get a real one.

[B]

Oh, dude, I think these are real tears. Like, I didn't even play. This is actual crying.

[A]

Poor K, man. Yeah, there's that. That's worth absolutely not anything, man. That is a K Rob signature on there. Oh.

[B]

Oh, my God. Dude.

[A]

Dude, I'm so happy having it at the last minute, too.

[B]

I mean, hold on. Bro. What a seal. Like, Yeah, I couldn't even tell.

[A]

Oh, man.

[B]

Bro, no, no, I'm. No, I'm. I'm literally. No. I'm spending a thousand dollars in the card shop today.

[A]

I don't care.

[B]

That is. I mean, you want to talk about a blue ball? Yeah. Colin Murray boils again. I mean. Oh, my God. Dude, I couldn't even get. I couldn't get a different rookie. I just got Colin Murray Boyles again. I'm sorry, Bronny James.

[A]

I'm sorry. We bought four packs just for this prank.

[B]

I mean, what. I mean, props to y'. All. That is some. That is some sick.

[A]

On the meetings when I was. I've been telling you about. Hey, we should really get into the cards. We should think about cards, doing the cards. All of that was a setup for this moment right now.

[B]

What if you're like, bro, I don't even like cards? I'd be like, what?

[A]

The thousand dollars of cards just for this prank. Like, really selling it, bro.

[B]

Oh, how.

[A]

How do you feel?

[B]

That's up, bro. I'm not gonna lie. That is. That is messed up, bro. It's. It's genius. I love it. Now, it's. In hindsight, but, dude, I. I mean, you. You should have felt the amount of tension in my fingers. I was not letting. I was not going to. I was going to hold that for the entirety of the experience.

[A]

Cam did not want me to hold that car.

[B]

No, I was.

[A]

I was.

[B]

I was ready to skip lunch. I wasn't going to set it down. I was going to hold it. I was going to hold that until I got to your house and put it in asleep.

[A]

I'm so sorry, man.

[B]

Oh, my God, dude, that's good.

[A]

How happy were you when you saw that sign? Cooper flag.

[B]

I'm not going to lie, because. Okay, so in these packs, specifically, the, like, the hit spot, like, a good card could be, is, like, right in the middle.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. So I went. And it was. I want to say there was some. There was someone else. I think it was this. Oh, it was this one. It was the greatness loading this one. I was like, oh, dude, this card's sick. And then I kind of just thumbed through and I saw a little autograph. And then I said. I said, oh, my Jesus. That's Cooper flag. And then I went. I was like, I think I have a rookie. Oh, dude, that's kind of pissing me off. No, I'm just kidding. That is beautifully done.

[A]

I got him.

[B]

So well done. You are a son of a. I mean.

[A]

Oh, my God, I can't wait for all the hate comments I'm about to get.

[B]

Hey, you.

[A]

That. That.

[B]

Now. That was good, though. That was good.

[A]

Oh, man.

[B]

Oh, my God. And I look like a prick. I didn't even let you hold it. I didn't let you touch it. I was like, oh, really? I was.

[A]

No, I was.

[B]

It's fun. It's crazy because on the way up here, dude, there's not even an orb. I'm over here shouting out a place that doesn't exist. I said, bro, shout out.

[A]

Orbit.

[B]

What? I literally, on the way up here, I said, bro, if we pull something great, like, that should be like a. Like, no matter who pulls it, like, that's sick moment. It's a ysk.

[A]

Like, grail moment. Like, that's bro.

[B]

And I literally thought we pulled the grailiest of grils. Holy. What a prank.

[A]

So good. What a prank. That's so good.

[B]

I mean, no, I'm. I'm not kidding. How many Colin Murray boils am I going to grab? Like, I. I have him in the flag. I have him in the vip. I have him in the regular rookie. I have like six. This guy.

[A]

I want to see how much, much that this Isaiah is worth.

[B]

Holy wow, bro. Did you open all yours?

[A]

Yeah, dude. I was trying to just rush through. Michael was like, please get to your card, bro. There was a moment I was worried for a second. I was like, dude, did he skip this card? Then it would have just ruined the whole thing. But that was. That was a fantastic episode. Cam, get us out of here, man.

[B]

Oh, man. Dude, my heart's absolutely broken and racing right now. That was fan. That's probably my. There's not too many times I say I enjoyed that prank.

[A]

Okay, good.

[B]

Normally my tongue is burning my on fire. This time. I enjoyed that. That was hilarious. But appreciate each and every single one of y'.

[A]

All.

[B]

Come back to you should know podcast episode 218. We absolutely love y'.

[A]

All.

[B]

We cannot wait to see you next week. But in the meantime, you already know we're going on tour, and it is approaching rather quickly. Hit that first and top link in the description. Get your tour tickets right now. That second link is the Koala Club. That is our amazing, amazing community over at Patreon. Patreon. We drop every Monday, every Wednesday, every Friday, every Saturday.

[A]

We drop a lot.

[B]

We drop all sorts of our exclusive content lives on the Patreon. And that third link is the new channel YSK Unplugged. Go over there. Leave a. Like a subscribe and a comment. We absolutely love y' all confuse the casuals. Get your good karma. This week's secret code.

[A]

SCF signed Cooper Flag.

[B]

SCF signed Cooper Flag. And put a. Put literally put a heartbreak emoji.

[A]

Honestly, Cooper Flag. If you see this clip, can you real one.

[B]

I literally pledged my allegiance to you. I pledged my allegiance to you. My allegiance.

[A]

Yeah, there's a whole page.

[B]

We absolutely love you.

[A]

All right. Love you. Remember when I took Love Bears. When we get home to Christmas and we'll see you on tour and we'll see you next time.

[B]

Yeah, no, it was good. It was funny. I'm just hurt. It was funny, though.