← Your Anxiety Toolkit - Practical Skills for Anxiety, Panic & Depression
Your Anxiety Toolkit - Practical Skills for Anxiety, Panic & Depression
Bonus Episode: Cognitive Defusion: 4 Techniques to Detach from Intrusive Thoughts (Mental Compulsion Tool)
00:10:01
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Have you ever had a thought that felt so real and so strong that it felt like the truth? It's pretty scary when it happens. It might feel really dangerous and it might feel like these thoughts that you're having are warnings. They're threats and they're urgent to do lists. And they can be so tricky. They can make you want to fight, they can make you want to ruminate, you make you want to avoid, they'll make you want to run away as fast as you can can. And they can leave you with painful degrees of indecision and confusion. By the end of this episode, you are going to learn the amazing skill of cognitive diffusion. This is a simple shift that will help you detach from intrusive thoughts. And this is an excellent anxiety and mental compulsion tool that you can use in any circumstance or situations. Welcome. My name is Kimberly Quillen. I am an anxiety and ocd specialist and I am on a mission to equip. Equip 10 million. Yep, I know, 10 million. It's a hefty goal. I'm pretty sure I can do it, though, if I really put my head to it. I want to equip 10 million people with anxiety with evidence based skills that they can use in any circumstance. Welcome. My name is Kimberly Quinlan. I'm an anxiety and ocd specialist. I'm a licensed therapist and I am on a mission to equip 10 million. Yes, I know 10 million people with anxiety with evidence based skills to help them manage their anxiety. Now, if you are here, thank you. It means that I'm on the right track. Please do share this with anyone you think will benefit from it. Okay, So I want you to imagine you're just walking through the park, you're minding your own business, trying to enjoy your Saturday, and all of a sudden you are hit with a massive intrusive thought or a degree of discomfort or a sensation, something that you don't want. Now, what happens in this moment? As soon as you have this feeling, this sensation, this thought, you treat it as if it is a real danger. This is the definition of fusion. It's where you lock in. I use this explainer. You lock in with that thought or that feeling and you treat it like it is a real imminent threat. Now, what I want to do is teach you a new skill called cognitive diffusion, which is the opposite of that. It is going to help you unlock from those intrusive thoughts, feelings, sensations, urges, or images so that you can go on and actually enjoy your day. So what I want you to now imagine is you're walking through the park, enjoying yourself, trying to have a great Saturday. You still have that intrusive thought, but I want you to use this skill. It's ultimately a metaphor. I want you to imagine that every thought or feeling you have is being projected up onto a screen. And so that you are learning instead of, instead of experiencing it as if it's real and true and imminent. You're going to watch it like it's a show on stage or on a TV screen. So what I want you to do is imagine that everything you're observing in this moment is like you're watching the news on the news screen. You're watching a person and they're reporting to you everything that's going on in the world. Maybe they're saying you're noticing cars right now, they're green and blue and red and yellow. You're also noticing people and there are some people that appear to be scary looking or there are some people that appear to be lovely looking. You're having thoughts about them being scary or very mean, right? Or lovely. You're also going to have these observer role of like, you're also noticing that your hand is shaking right now, or that you have some pain in your hand, or you're also noticing your fingertips right now. When we're practicing cognitive diffusion, when narrating what's going on and we're being an observer to it, maybe you're saying, I'm noticing that the sky is blue, I'm noticing that the sun is out, or I'm noticing that I'm having some thoughts that scare me right now. This is the practice of, of cognitive diffusion. Now what you'll also find is when you have anxiety, for us lucky folks that have anxiety, just like when you're watching the news, there will be that little rolling tape at the bottom of the screen that tells you of all of the worst case scenarios that could happen. It's going to tell you bad things are happening, bad things will happen, and you've got to keep an eye out, right? That's often where our attention goes. And so when we are observing our day, often what we do is we put our ATT on that banner at the bottom and all of the what ifs instead of focusing on actually what's going on in the world. So what I want you to focus on instead is I want you to practice this skill of diffusion as you go around through the day. You're at the park, you're at work, you're with your family, you're with your friends. I want you to start to use these phrases. Number one, you're going to start the sentence with, I'm having the thought. Instead of saying, what? What if I do a bad thing? You're going to say, I'm having the thought that I might do a bad thing. That gives you some distance from the thought so that you don't treat it like it's a fact and you're allowed to just observe it as a thought. And a thought is no different to that little banner that just slides along the bottom. We don't have to give that our attention just because it's there. It doesn't need to take up all of our attention and what we're focusing on. The next thing you could say is, I'm noticing. I'm noticing discomfort in my stomach. Instead of going, oh no, I've got a tummy ache and I'm going to, you know, have a bathroom accident, you're going to say, I'm noticing some tension in my stomach. I'm noticing that my heart rate has increased, or I'm noticing the onset of more scary thoughts. You could also say, my mind is saying, so instead of saying, you suck. You're a terrible person. How dare you. You're going to say, my mind is that I suck. Right? It gives you just a little bit of distance so that instead of going, yeah, yeah, you're right, I do. You can start to question that just because I think it doesn't mean it's true. Or you could respond by going, thanks, brain. I notice again, you could go back to, I'm noticing that you're saying a lot of mean things right now. But I'm not going to give that my attention. This is the skill of cognitive diffusion. Now let's go back and forth just to be really clear before we finish up here. An example of fusion is, oh, crap, bad things are coming. If with cognitive diffusion we'd say, I'm having thoughts that bad things are coming. If you had the thought you suck, the diffusion would be, I'm noticing that my brain is getting stuck on self criticism to get me moving. If you have the thought, this feeling must mean something. That is a classic example of fusion diffusion would be, I am observing the presence of anxiety. I notice an increased heart rate, or I notice that my chest is a little bit tighter. So they're very similar. One locks you in to treat it like it's really important and all real and true, and the other one gives you some distance. Now, if you want to learn how to do this even more. We do have an online course called the Rumination Reset. It's where I teach you how to reduce rumination, how to stop mental compulsions and live your life life a little more present. We'll go much deeper with many more skills than we've talked about today. The diffusion skill is just one of those and so do click the link below or go to cbtschool.com to learn more about the Rumination Reset. As always, thank you for being here. Please do send this to someone who could benefit. Again, I have created a hefty goal for myself so I do believe we can do this together. Thank you so much for being here. I cannot wait to see you in the next episode. Please note that this podcast or any other resources from CBTSchool.com should not replace professional mental health care. If you feel you would benefit, please reach out to a provider in your area. Have a wonderful day and thank you for supporting CBTSchool.com.