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Tom Segura
Tickets are available now for my upcoming November shows. November 27th, I'm in Hollywood, Florida, at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel and Casino. And November 29th, I'm in Tallahassee, Florida, at the Donald L. Tucker Civic Center. Well, welcome.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Welcome to your mom's house.
Tom Segura
Alex, do you like canned cranberry sauce.
Christina P.
Or should we make it ourselves?
Sebastian Maniscalco
That's my mom. She didn't know about Instacart's family carts.
Christina P.
So I make pecan pie this year, yes or no? Oh, and how many boxes of stuffing? So I told her we could just.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Share a family cart and add all our holiday favorites to the same order.
Christina P.
Without losing our voices or our sanity.
Tom Segura
It's so much fun.
Christina P.
Alex, can you get my holiday village out of the attic? Baby steps, Alex.
Tom Segura
Baby steps.
Christina P.
Shop Instacart this holiday season and enjoy free delivery on your first three orders. Service fees and terms apply.
Tom Segura
Alex, you can catch our guest on the It Ain't Right tour. Now check him out in season two of Bookie this December. It's Sebastian Maniscalco, everybody. Let him hear it.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Thank you for having me here.
Tom Segura
First time coming. Thanks for coming, man.
Sebastian Maniscalco
We've been friends for a while.
Tom Segura
For a good while. Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And this is the first time actually. I think I've actually seen you two together.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I always see you separately.
Christina P.
That's why. That's why the marriage works.
Tom Segura
That's right.
Christina P.
We're never.
Tom Segura
Plenty of time apart.
Christina P.
That's right, babe.
Tom Segura
That's right.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Well, no, this is the first time I've seen you together.
Tom Segura
That's true.
Sebastian Maniscalco
We ever. We haven't really been around each other as this.
Tom Segura
That's true.
Sebastian Maniscalco
You were at the Comedy Store. I saw you and the Palisades. Yeah. And.
Christina P.
Oh, that's right. At that little cute village.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah. Right before you just being.
Christina P.
Being regular people. It's always weird to see a comic in the light of day. There's people that I've only ever known in the dark at the store for, like, 20 years. Whoa, dude, you look totally different.
Tom Segura
You're like, wow, man, you have hair.
Christina P.
Yeah, it's wild.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah.
Tom Segura
That's crazy.
Christina P.
Anyway, Sebastian, I have the best memories of you. The first time I saw you was in Santa Monica at a bar. Some show we always did on a weeknight, you know. And you were doing your Ross dress for Less.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Wow.
Christina P.
And I was like, that's the funniest thing.
Tom Segura
That's one of those bits that made it in the rounds amongst comics. They're like. Like, have you seen this guy's this bit you know, like everyone had like signature bits that like you discover people on. And I remember, I think hearing about that bit even before I saw it, like, people are like, this is the funniest bit I've ever seen.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Thank you.
Christina P.
And your cadence and your confidence.
Tom Segura
And I was like, I think I actually saw you first at the Comedy of Magic Club.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Is that where we ran into each other?
Tom Segura
Well, I think. I don't even know if I ran into you. I was like, down there and I think they were like, you were having your own night and you hadn't quite like ascended to, you know, doing huge. But that show was sold out. And I was like, how's the show sold out? Like, how does anyone know how people know who you are yet? I don't think. I think it was like pre specials and stuff. And they're like, oh, he's got like, people are. They were like discovering, you know, I mean, like in the midst of discovering you and. Because I would just do like those 15 minute spots there, you know, eat salmon.
Christina P.
Oh, that was the best part.
Sebastian Maniscalco
It's a nice salmon.
Tom Segura
And that's. Yeah, that's. I think that's where I first saw you. And I was like, oh, wow, this guy's got. Yeah, I could see how funny you were.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, well, thanks. Yeah, it's a funny relationship with comedians because going to the comedy clubs, I never really spoke or I hung out, but I didn't really, like, wasn't a hang guy and didn't like hang out till like 2 o'clock in the morning.
Tom Segura
Cause you're kind of an introvert too, right?
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, I just kind of like doing my comedy.
Tom Segura
Do your business and you go, yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Especially when I met my wife, I just treated it as like, I gotta go do a set and then I'll come back home and we'll hang out. So. Yeah. But then I do remember us crossing paths at the Comedy Store. Yeah, I think you brought me up one night.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And then we did. What was the festival we did together.
Tom Segura
That's right. And that's actually when you had popped. Because I remember what would happen was, this is pretty funny. I'll try to do this without hurting anyone else's feelings, but this was oddball. So Live Nation decided to do their version of a, you know, a comedy festival the way mu. Like Lollapalooza or whatever. And so they booked this tour of all these cities at amphitheaters. Right. And this is like 20, end of 2015, I think. I think it's like end of 2015. And all of a sudden, like, everyone knew Sabat. Like, they used to do him at, like, Madonna.
Christina P.
Yeah.
Tom Segura
Everyone's like, so lucky.
Christina P.
The one name thing.
Tom Segura
And we. And here's the thing, though. He wasn't closing out most show. He was like, second to last. And I remember we were like, one of the shows, I'm sitting there with Jeff Ross, and you go up and the place goes crazy. He's like, it's gonna be a problem for whoever's after this. I was like, yeah, that's gonna suck. And then he would go up and everybody was. They're like, oh, they're out here to see you. And we did the Chicago area one, and then we did the Long island one, the Jones Beach.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Oh, Jones Beach. Yeah.
Tom Segura
It was pandemonium when you went up there. I was like, oh. Like, everybody was there that was like, oh. I could see that this was gonna. This is like a magic market. Like, the New York.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah.
Tom Segura
Italians were all out. He got. He was like, good night. And they were just like, boop. And you just saw, like. And we're like, hey, there's like, two more people going up. There were like 8,000 people at one time were leaving.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Oh, 8,000 Italians just got up and left. And I think it was John Mulaney, actually, that went on after me that he was. We were joking about. Fact that he's up there and, like, just all this cologne left.
Christina P.
The place gone.
Tom Segura
Yeah, yeah, it was. I mean, that's the thing is, like, you know the. That spot, too. It's like. It's actually like the sweet spot. Right. Second to last. I actually had one of the most desire. Like, I learned this from doing that tour. And I've told other people since, if you ever get on one of those, you go. If you can go right before intermission.
Christina P.
That'S the sweet spot.
Tom Segura
That is the spot. And the reason is they've seen all the. Like, they're warmed up. They're like, we're at a show right before intermission. Sun's down. So now it's dark.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah.
Tom Segura
And intermission means you can go have dinner. So, like, the show's gonna go on another fucking two hours because there's an intermission and then all the acts. So I would literally get, like, this cushion. Sweet spot. And then I'd see everybody. I'd be like, I'm. I'm going into the city. I'm going to go have dinner right now. And it was like, I tell anybody, like, if you can call your shot on this thing, Right before intermission is the best spot.
Christina P.
That's what we did in South Africa.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, South Africa, doing comedy.
Christina P.
We did a Million Years Ago festival there before we had children.
Tom Segura
Durban and Johannesburg, they ended up going. They. Yeah, it was the Nando's. Nando's Chicken.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Nando's Chicken had a tour.
Christina P.
Yeah, yeah, it was. It was really fun. It was probably one of the best.
Tom Segura
Experiences, I'll say this. Nando's Chicken's great. On the 11th night, you're like, I don't think I want any more chicken.
Christina P.
Because they would give it to you free in the green room. And that Perry Perry sauce. By day five, you're like, I'm throwing.
Tom Segura
I'm going to blood again. Yeah, but that was fun. That was really fun.
Christina P.
That was a good time.
Tom Segura
And again, that was the thing you learned. It was like there was all, you know, the. The Live nation one was kind of like. I don't know, it was just kind of laid out like, this is what it is. Like, all right. But then on the South Africa one, I feel like there was kind of, like, a little more egos involved.
Christina P.
Like, people, I know where you're going.
Tom Segura
And I like posturing, you know, I mean, for, like, I should go here, and I don't want to go. And I just was like, you know, happy. I was like, where. Where do we go? I mean, it was one of those things. And was Ian. Ian Bag hosted, Right? Didn't he host? Yeah, Bagels, man. He did. He hosted.
Christina P.
He did, like, one of the early spots before intermission and murder.
Tom Segura
Oh, hey, dude.
Christina P.
So funny.
Tom Segura
He would destroy and. Yeah, but that was another thing where I would watch other people kind of be like, I should. I think I should go here. And I was like, oh, boy. Okay, do whatever you want. Like.
Christina P.
And then there was one who had the ego. Okay, we'll just say this. This person shall remain nameless however they felt. Because at the time, they were a hot ticket in the States, but they.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Demanded a lot of breathing going out.
Christina P.
Over here to close out this festival. And by the way, you've got heavy hitters on the show, right? Bagels, Tom Segura. It's great. It's a good lineup.
Tom Segura
And you got some. Some big hitters in South Africa, you know, I mean, you forget that, like, you're discovering them, but they're. They're. They're. They're known. So you go, like, you show up to another country, like, yeah, I know what I'm doing. They're like, yeah, so is this guy he's from here. So, like, just. Just so you know.
Christina P.
And he knows the local jokes and the culture and, you know, that's everything. Wait, you tell it, though. Could you tell a story? I'm, like, sweating thinking about it.
Tom Segura
No, I think we should stop.
Christina P.
I think we should stop.
Tom Segura
Oh, I was.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I was getting interesting.
Tom Segura
We.
Christina P.
Let's just say this person demanded it, and it was very well known, and it was an I to my contract, and we were all like, all right, bro, like, go ahead, knock it out. And let's just say he ate some African cock like AIDS dicks. It was wild.
Tom Segura
That happened to be.
Christina P.
He got booed.
Tom Segura
Very black and big. They were big black.
Christina P.
He got booed. He got booed. I remember that, learning that lesson from that night of like, don't let your ego get into it. If you're in a different part of the world and this guy's the number one star, you're not the star here. Yeah, it's all relative. In certain markets, you're not the star.
Tom Segura
If I was in Atlantic City with you, I'd be like, I think Sebastian should close the show. For sure. I will host. Yeah, no, you got. Yeah, you can't get all.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Just. Just without saying any names. Is the comedian.
Tom Segura
He died.
Sebastian Maniscalco
He died.
Christina P.
We'll tell you the name off Mike, and I think the answer is yes. Still. Still around.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Still around. Okay, good to know this live.
Tom Segura
Get ready to cut that thing up.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Do you have. So has this. This show's been on how long?
Tom Segura
Since 2010.
Sebastian Maniscalco
2010. So you got 14 years, right?
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Is there an archival, like, edit, like the stuff that you edited out somewhere on a drive?
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And like when you pass away, this comes out.
Tom Segura
Well, it's a. It's a great way for one last viral clip. The Put it in our will the day we croak.
Christina P.
That's a great idea.
Tom Segura
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Sebastian Maniscalco
Podcast because Pete and I, we do this Pete Sebastian show, we say a lot of stuff. Well, Pete, Pete more than I. And then we'll have to go cut it out. Yeah, and there's, there's all this cutout stuff, which I think is really funny.
Tom Segura
It's all the things that everybody would love to hear.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, right. And then it's like, really, we can't air this because someone's going to get bent out of shape or whatever. So, yeah, we have, we have a archival folder.
Tom Segura
Well, it's like, you know, we all do this, but like, when we sit around like, I just had a couple lunches with comics, who the best is when they just. You go, it's good to see you. And they just rant and talk shit and you're like, God, I wish I could release this because it's like, it's what everybody would love. And you go, yeah, you can't Say it. But man, if somebody just was like, fuck it and release one of those, it would be unbelievable, you know?
Sebastian Maniscalco
Well, I think in the com. Comedy community, from what I've seen from afar, if you didn't know anything about comedians, right, you would think everybody's like, supportive of every other comedian. There's just big camaraderie and everybody's just hoping everybody else does great. I don't think that's the case, is it at least.
Christina P.
No way.
Tom Segura
It's not.
Sebastian Maniscalco
It seems like it's on the surface.
Tom Segura
I think there's camaraderie amongst certain people in certain. If you're friends, if you're actually like close and you celebrate your friends victories and you're like, oh, that's, you know, I mean, like there's. Or that there's also this thing where like, you don't even have to be friends. But if you're like, you know, he's a good guy and you hear good news, you're like, good for that guy. He's a good guy. I like that guy.
Christina P.
I will say, hard work always trumps even the shittiest personality in our business. You'd be like, yeah, but they totally grind.
Tom Segura
They've been grinding at it so hard 22 years.
Christina P.
I think the time comedians get real nasty is when you're like, that fucking. What that just happened. Like, you didn't even do your time. Like, we're very like prisoners. We're like, if you haven't fucking done the time, bro.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's true.
Tom Segura
That is true.
Christina P.
You gotta be in the trenches for a certain amount of time.
Sebastian Maniscalco
So what is the certain amount of time? What do you, what do you deem as like, for what?
Tom Segura
For what?
Christina P.
At what level?
Tom Segura
Because everybody has like, well, okay, for.
Sebastian Maniscalco
A comedian to make, to be making a very nice living doing standup. And let's say if that's at the theater level.
Christina P.
Oh, wow.
Tom Segura
Over 10.
Sebastian Maniscalco
You gotta be over 10.
Christina P.
I would say 15 to 17 at theaters if you're doing it. But if you had some break that like, that's true.
Tom Segura
You had hopscotch. But if you're over, let's say you're. I'm just 12 years in and somebody goes, hey, this person is doing well. People go, okay, they've. They've put some time into this, you know, like, yeah, there, there is a big thing for that. But then you, the people who pop later in life, like, that's the ones who are like, you know, they're in their 50 or something and they've been at. Then everyone really, you could tell, they really cheer for. It's just this thing where it's like understood that person has been grinding away at this and they're finally getting their moment. I feel like most comics just go, I approve.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Christina P.
What do you think, Sebastian?
Sebastian Maniscalco
No, I think around that time, I guess 12, 13 years. I mean, I mean, there is exceptions to that rule, obviously. The one that comes to mind for me is Eddie Murphy was like, whatever, 20, 21, like a unicorn.
Tom Segura
Unicorn thing.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Which you could kind of understand why he skipped the line because he was just so super talented. But yeah, I mean, knocking around.
Tom Segura
Then there's like the other thing, like, because that's like purely stand up based. But then there's, there's. If your talent shines in another space and you get something because of that, I think most people go, you know, if the talent, like, if they see that the talent is easily read. Like when Tiffany Haddish popped when she was on that movie, that road trip, girls, girls trip or whatever. You watch the trailer and you're like, man, she's a, she's a comedy star. So no one's gonna be like, I can't believe you're getting shit. You watch that and you're like, yeah, she's clearly super talented. I think people. And I don't, I don't have any reference for how long she was in it then, but I just go like, you see that she's good at this thing, right? So you kind of celebrate that too.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I think I do. I. I think so. However, I'm gonna throw another curveball at you.
Tom Segura
Yeah, Bert's fat. Is that what you're gonna say?
Sebastian Maniscalco
Huge.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Christina P.
And he drinks a lot, by the way.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I just saw something on Instagram with him and his wife and he's doing the thing and is, is there any. And I don't know what's going on on Bert's team or whatnot, but like, when he's got like his whatever, assistant or producers there and they got to look at his ass or balls hanging out, is there like a human resources or anything?
Tom Segura
That's. These guys, they've been on that side of it.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Guys.
Tom Segura
What's the thought on that? Yeah, you just accept it. No hr.
Sebastian Maniscalco
No hr yeah.
Christina P.
There's a lot of women on his team too.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, I noticed.
Christina P.
That's got to be cool for them.
Tom Segura
Yeah. The younger ones especially. It is funny that you brought this up. So one time we were, we were all hanging out. This is like maybe the last tour or something. And it was like his guys, his team and me. And then he was like, yeah, you know, I just. I get naked in front of people on the bus and I go, you know, you really shouldn't do that. He's like, why? And I go, because people, like, they work for you. They don't necessarily want to see you naked. And he goes, what? And he turns and like, his whole team is there. He goes, what's up with this? And they were like, yeah, we would appreciate it if you change behind clothes.
Christina P.
He was like, what the fuck?
Tom Segura
He's like, you're just saying this now. I go, well, you never thought of this, that someone doesn't want to see you change? And he was like, all right, I'll start changing with the door closed. I go, that's a normal thing to do because he was just changing in front of people.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, yeah, he's very, very comfortable. I mean, he is.
Tom Segura
I'll say this, I do admire. I do admire that as somebody who's so self loathing and God, this looks like. And I, I see him as a free bird in that regard. And he's just like, not only that, he's like, I look great. Like, he's like, I look great. And I'm like, okay, that's a cool narrative in your head, but I think I took your. Sorry, I took your curve ball away.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah. What was I doing? Curveball. Okay. Do you think that there is. With all this stuff going on on the Internet and podcasting, this, that and the other thing that comedians that are coming up now are spending the amount of time in the comedy clubs honing their actual. As maybe generations before them, or are people just worried about pumping out videos and podcasts and whatnot?
Tom Segura
It's a really insightful question. My thought on it is it's a different path. So we also can't think in terms of just how we did it because what's available today was not available to us. So I think it's probably a combination of. No. Like, to a degree, no, they're not doing just what we did. But they're also like hyper aware that these viral clips can change your.
Christina P.
Change your ticket sales, change your career. Yeah, but I think you're right. And I don't think the club support feature acts as much anymore.
Tom Segura
That's 100.
Christina P.
That's what it sounds like.
Sebastian Maniscalco
No, they don't.
Christina P.
Is that kids can't get.
Tom Segura
You can't be a feature.
Christina P.
There's no featuring because you, you bring.
Tom Segura
Who you want to bring to Everybody.
Christina P.
Yeah, mostly the headliners bring. Or they'll give the kid from like Tick Tock who's got millions of followers who can sell out that show or whatever, may not be the best act live, but can move tickets. Which I totally understand from a club's perspective. Right. But yeah, I just don't think they're spending time. They don't have the time to hone the way we did. You know, you would get those weeks from Stroop and you're like so stoked. You're like, oh, I'm gonna work 40 weeks and like Toledo, Des Moines, Iowa, whatever. And these funny bones.
Tom Segura
And also clubs have also changed their weeks. I didn't realize that until recently. Where a lot of clubs now have changed from being the Wednesday Thursday to. They're like. They're like Friday Saturday.
Christina P.
Really?
Tom Segura
Yeah, there's a lot of clubs doing Friday Saturday shows. And maybe they'll do some other. But I'm saying like the offer to the comic like we used to be like, yeah, they'll be like, you'll come here Wednesday, Thursday morning, you'll do press, you do Friday, Saturday. They're like, oh, like I talked to my friends who are like, they just started working funny bones and stuff. And they're like, yeah, my offers are Friday, Saturday. That's it.
Christina P.
Great.
Tom Segura
So they're condensing the week too.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Well, what are they doing the rest of the week?
Tom Segura
Just local.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Local people.
Tom Segura
Yeah. Maybe they're doing. Figuring out something to do in the. In the.
Christina P.
I think they're doing like quiz nights. Quiz night bingo. I don't know.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I think they might be renting it out for other thing. I think any couple dude like church on Sundays. There's some of them. Church.
Tom Segura
I kind of understand this too. When you especially like when you're. When you're not like cleaning out places, but like when you're start when your is starting to sell and like they go, hey, for the week. For the. For Wednesday through Sunday, you know, you sold 600 tickets here. It's like, dude, can we do less shows then? You know what I mean?
Christina P.
Like not pay the staff and the lights.
Tom Segura
Yeah. I mean, as the act, you're just like, great, why don't we try to get like 400 of them to come Friday Saturday. That's pretty good. Two nights or whatever, you know. I don't know. That's. It's that old model I think did need some tweaking. Tweaking, yeah, for sure.
Sebastian Maniscalco
So I did want to ask you a couple things. Yeah, that I'm here and I have to. And I would assume this is planned.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
You do a really great job on keeping your kids off social media.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And is that something that delivers?
Tom Segura
For sure.
Sebastian Maniscalco
So. Because I've never, I've seen your kids in person at the Palisades, but I go on your Instagram, I go, wow, their kids are completely. I just ghosted. Is that something that you decided before you even had them?
Tom Segura
Here's the thing. Yes. I realized early on, I think that I was like, you know, this lane of stand up we're in is also like because there's lanes within comedy. You know what I mean? Where like there's Kleenex, there's family acts, there's, you know, there's, there's just like different stuff. And I realized like, we embrace chaos on this podcast.
Christina P.
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Tom Segura
I know, but it's fucking mayhem, dude.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I saw.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
This Funkle Funk. Well, the. With the bathtub. I mean, right.
Tom Segura
So. But like, it fuels this whole thing of like. Of like there's weird shit out there and we're. We are finding out what's weird. And then the comments are a mix of very funny. Like there's very funny comments, there's crazy shit. And it just gave me a peek into this side of humanity where I was like, this is chaotic. And, you know, it's not fucking Main street where you go, like, everything's great here. So I was like, I don't want to. I don't think I should be like, here's my kids to that. I thought that before even having kids.
Christina P.
And they don't see us on YouTube. They don't see anything. Really?
Sebastian Maniscalco
That's great. So you're saying that there's like an underbelly of society here that you're. That you're tapping into?
Tom Segura
I believe so.
Christina P.
I would prefer to say highlighting. Showcasing the marginalized communities that's always on the Internet.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Christina P.
People that you don't get a voice. Sebastian. That's how we see it. These gentlemen.
Sebastian Maniscalco
So. And again, fascinating how this all. So is this something that just developed organically or did you guys go, we're gonna. No, we're gonna do this?
Tom Segura
No, it's.
Christina P.
Sebastian. It's. It's our shared sensibility. I will say we both laughed at the worst part of Grizzly man. That documentary, I don't know if you remember, about Timothy Treadwell, this maniac that would go live on a bear reservation thinking that he was protecting bears.
Tom Segura
You saw that doc?
Sebastian Maniscalco
I didn't see it.
Tom Segura
It's all the unbelievable.
Christina P.
This is one of the first. Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Okay.
Christina P.
Tom. This is 2005. We're on a date, we go see.
Tom Segura
Grizzly man and then we're in the theater. And Werner Herzog is a legendary filmmaker and he's making a very compassionate movie about this lost soul. Timothy Treble is a lost soul.
Christina P.
You're supposed to feel bad.
Tom Segura
Who goes to the. To Alaska and lives with bears and documents it. And then during the Documentary. At one point, they find a pilot who had taken him from where civilization is to drop them off where bears are, something that nobody does. So he goes, yeah, you know, this guy comes up to me and he's asking me to drop him in bear country. You know, I thought he was retarded, you know, and we laughed so hard in the theater, and you could see people being like, this isn't funny. And that's when we felt like, oh, there's a real bond here.
Christina P.
And that is the start of our show. Shared sense of everything chaotic and weird.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And then they don't say about no nothing.
Christina P.
We really enjoy these things in private life. And then we decided to start talking about it on a podcast.
Tom Segura
That's true. That's true.
Christina P.
It's all that we love.
Tom Segura
I don't know. It's like. It's what I find funny in things like, you know, like little moments. Like on the Fun uncle on the Funko clip, this little beat at the end, I could study. Yeah. For six days, I could watch the clip over and over because there's so many, like, micro movements, micro emotions in it. And that's what, like, what always makes me laugh about these clips is, like, the. The nuance of it. Yeah, yeah, it's. It really.
Christina P.
Which is interesting with you, Sebastian, because I feel like you're an upholder of the opposite of, like, what the is wrong with everybody? Why can't people just fucking be normal?
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah. So, yeah, that's kind of where my mindset is.
Tom Segura
Be normal more like you're kind of.
Christina P.
In your hell garden right now.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm coming from, like, the manners. Like, what does anybody have, like, manners? Or, like, are we all kind of just. Is society falling apart at the seams?
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
So my. It's a disdain and disgust for.
Tom Segura
Yes.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Behavior that seems to be.
Tom Segura
It's a great lane, too. It really is a great lane. I know I identify with it to a great degree. I. Oddly enough, in stand up, I've always adhered to, like, towing that line as well. Like, I've always called out, like, are you seeing this? Yeah, you know, like, are you seeing this fucking nonsense? But I feel like it's definitely been branded. It's like it's a Sebastian brand is essentially, like, what the fuck's going on here? Yeah, it's like. You know what I mean? Like, it's a great comedic lane.
Christina P.
Yeah. Did you grow up proper?
Sebastian Maniscalco
I wouldn't say proper. I just grew up with, like, very, like, you're not wearing that we're going here.
Tom Segura
It's old school values in a way. Right. It's like, it's traditional value.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Traditional values. And you say we're talking about drugs and whatnot. My family didn't do any pot or hallucinogenics growing up. My dad was a hairstylist. My mother was a secretary. And there was like.
Tom Segura
Did your father. I never asked you this. Did he himself immigrate or did his parents immigrate? He did as a child or as an adult.
Sebastian Maniscalco
At 15, he came here.
Tom Segura
Oh. So, like, okay, so he was, you.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Know, he spent 15 years in Sicily, and growing up that way, brought some of those, you know, techniques here to the United States to teach his kids. And my mother very, you know, like, sweet and nice.
Tom Segura
And we all have immigrant parents. It's a. There is a shared experience in that and having immigrant parents.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I think so. I mean, I think they. They bring a whole different set of rules.
Tom Segura
Yes.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Maybe you don't see in other parents that were maybe raised here.
Tom Segura
My mom is big, big time with, like, you have to be kidding that you're wearing that or you.
Christina P.
Oh, for sure, big time.
Tom Segura
Like, are you out of your mind? Which is like. There's like, a consistent theme. For sure.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Well, you could do two things. You could adhere to that, right?
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Or you could rebel against it.
Tom Segura
Totally.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Did you listen or what? Were you going, well, I'm gonna go and do my own. I'm wearing my own.
Christina P.
So maybe.
Tom Segura
Yeah, you rebelled big time. You rebelled.
Christina P.
But then now, as an adult, I go to, like, the courthouse, and you're like, who the fuck is wearing flip flops and shorts to court? Are you out of your mind? And now on airplanes, pajama bottoms, house slippers in the airport.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah.
Christina P.
Like, now I'm becoming my parents with that stuff.
Tom Segura
Yeah. I mean, like, total Euro. I think what I did was I learned exactly what to do. And, like, I understand it completely. And then I know how to specifically upset my mother, which for 45 years has given me a thrill, you know, So I love to, like. I know not to belch at the table because I know how much it's going to upset her. You know, things like that. Like. Yeah, all right. I just described to her my series that I'm shooting next month. And, like, the stories in it, it's like all these, like, you know, like, old Twilight Zone stories. And each one of them, she was like. She goes, I will never leave my house. If you make this, you have to use a different name. I go, different name. She's like, people can't know this is you. She's like, you are just you. Why don't you just make pornography? You know, I just know that it'll upset her, but I love upsetting her. I don't know. It's just, like, a trigger for me.
Christina P.
He hates his mom. It's okay. We all do if you're a comic.
Tom Segura
No, I think you mean everyone hates my mom.
Christina P.
Oh, yeah. Specifically. Yeah, your mom. Yeah. All right.
Tom Segura
So is your. Wait, is your mom immigrant or. She was.
Sebastian Maniscalco
No, no, she was born here. My father was born in Sicily and they met in Chicago. And. Yeah, they've been really. I mean, they've been really supportive of, you know, what I do.
Tom Segura
No, I've seen, like. It's actually a very, like, endearing thing, the element of, like, not know. I don't think I've ever met. I'm trying to think if I've been somewhere. Your dad's been there, too, maybe briefly or something. But the idea of, like, how much you bring them into things, it's very endearing.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, it's. They're involved, you know, they're there.
Tom Segura
Your sister, too. I want to say. I've seen her in a bunch of things.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah. I mean, sister's got three kids, so it's harder for her to go see shows, but she'll be in Chicago with me, with her family. It's nice to have the family, especially the kids now kind of getting to know what I do, coming to the shows. It's just. It's just such a different upbringing than I had.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And, like, we were just at the Madison Square Garden. They're running around the Garden up. Up top, in the. In the balcony. Right. They're looking at that, going. I was. I was in my yard digging holes, playing with worms. You know, that was like my.
Tom Segura
You realize they're going to tell those stories, too.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, yeah. It's. It's really cool to kind of have them witness it and them sharing all the excitement of it all. So. Yeah, it's been really, really good for us because, as you well know, you go on the road, Right. You got kids at home, you know, before you know it, they're 18, 19, 20 years old. So I'm very, very conscious now of, like, I don't want to miss a lot. You know, I don't want to be in Montana while my daughter's at a gymnastic meet.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
So. But before you know it, you know, you keep telling yourself you're gonna slow down, because I don't Know how you guys operate?
Christina P.
This is a shit that I say to you all the time. Literally, I'm like. It just. Yeah.
Tom Segura
So wait, how do you deal with it?
Christina P.
Gonna die. You're gonna die.
Tom Segura
You're just gonna die.
Christina P.
They're gonna grow up.
Sebastian Maniscalco
They're gonna grow up, and then I don't.
Christina P.
Then what? You're famous. Big deal. Nobody remembers you in five years anyway. Do you remember Don Rickles? Anybody in the booth? Phyllis Stiller? Any of those names?
Tom Segura
No.
Christina P.
Rodney Dangerfield?
Tom Segura
None.
Christina P.
Okay, go ahead.
Tom Segura
You were saying?
Sebastian Maniscalco
Sorry, I didn't mean to touch on such a sensitive topic.
Christina P.
No, it's fine.
Sebastian Maniscalco
No, but listen, because I go, okay, this is very fleeting, this business. Right.
Tom Segura
Totally.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I look at it very negatively. I'm not Mr. Positivity when it comes to, like, it's always going to be there. I look at it like, next year it's. It. It's over. Another guy is going to come in or whatever. So I look at it. It's like, let me get it now, right before it's over. But then you keep saying that every year, and next thing you know, the kids are 21. You're like, what the fuck was I doing? So what I have done is I'm like, you know what? Let me pull back here a little bit, because what are we going to. I don't got to have. I don't got to do everything right. It was up to me. I was just. I just like. I just like doing standup.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
But sometimes you get pressured and go, you got a podcast? No, you got to get a podcast.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And I was, all right, we got to go get a podcast. Like you do. TV show, broader audience. This and that and the other thing. So I find myself sometimes doing things not necessarily out of the love of doing it.
Tom Segura
Yes.
Sebastian Maniscalco
But for. To feed the animal, to feed the standup. So at the end of the day, it's like, you know, how. How many. How much stuff you going to do?
Tom Segura
It's the exact conversation, exactly the same. And then you go, you know what I want to do? I want to quit things. Like, you just want to quit. You just want to go, I want to stop doing that and just do this.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah.
Tom Segura
And. And then you have to decide how you. How you're going to manage that. You got it. But you have to say no to things. Yeah. That's a hard thing to learn.
Sebastian Maniscalco
So you two, for you, is your passion, the stand up. Is it this?
Tom Segura
I have a lot of fun doing this. There's nothing more fun than stand Up. I think we both feel like there's nothing stand up.
Christina P.
Stand up is the absolute best in the world. Traveling to do it, however, sucks is the worst vile part of it. And I unfortunately can't really do it. I mean, I'm almost 50 now and my body can't handle it. I'm over it. I got two kids. So I learned favorite.
Tom Segura
So this is the second I learned to pare down the tour. Like I did the last tour and I learned that like that's an insane, non sustainable and also not fun, non beneficial way of doing it. Like this weekend I go out, I do three shows. I come right home. I'm home for a few weeks. The next time I go out, it's two shows. Like, that's. That makes it so that also that when is it. First of all, I'm enjoying life at home, spending more time with my family. But also the actual standup becomes more fun. It doesn't become like, I gotta do nine shows this week and then I gotta do it again. And we. It's not. That's not fun. I don't have. I don't enjoy that.
Christina P.
I wish we could do stand up at like 3pm yeah, that is funny. Why can't we?
Tom Segura
That's our, that's our age showing the most. Because she'll come, she'll be like, got great news. I go, what? She goes, I just booked a 5pm show in like Tampa.
Christina P.
Yeah, why not?
Tom Segura
Good.
Christina P.
Why not Sunday at 5?
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, that's what what's his name's doing. Bergazzi.
Tom Segura
Yes. Great.
Sebastian Maniscalco
He does like matinees.
Tom Segura
Yeah, he does daytime shows. I know.
Sebastian Maniscalco
5, 5pm this guy's doing the show during the daylight. Which is, which is. I'm like, you could do that. Yeah, I just thought, I thought.
Tom Segura
I know.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I thought comedy was directly associated with nighttime. Not.
Tom Segura
It's the best. It is the. And also, I don't know, I am not built long term. I have a few. But doing doubles, I'm like, I don't want to do.
Sebastian Maniscalco
The. Doubles are done.
Tom Segura
Doubles are.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Doubles are done. That's a nightmare.
Tom Segura
That kills you.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, it definitely kills you. Do you guys. When you're doing stand up for multiple shows, multiple runs, if you have to do five in a week or what have you, is the act the same from soup to nuts as far as the order is concerned, do you ever get to a bit and go, oh God, I gotta. Of course I gotta do this again, dude.
Tom Segura
In this current hour, in the. Let's say I've been Touring it for nine months or something. I've had this. I think this is the only time it's been this dramatic. I've had the last, the closing 15 become the opening 15, become the middle 15, become the third quarter fifth. Like, I've shifted it that many times for some out of boredom, some out of excitement, and then some out of, like. Oh, I think I'm figuring out what to do.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah.
Tom Segura
And it's the only thing that ever cures that is either a new order or a new bit.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah.
Christina P.
What do you do? Do you do the same?
Sebastian Maniscalco
I switch it up, just the order. Like, he's saying just like, let's try this in the beginning. Because there's some bits that I. That are my favorites that are in the middle. And I feel after I get to those, I feel like it's like a letdown.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Christina P.
It's like trudge through the next.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah. This is not going to be as funny as what I just said, because you.
Tom Segura
Ultimately, I feel like an hour. You want an hour to go like this, like this, like this, like this, and then like that. Like, you want it to end like that. And sometimes you go like this, and then you end straight. Like, it's still good, but you're like, no, it doesn't have this.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, it doesn't have.
Tom Segura
And you need. You feel like you need that.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah.
Tom Segura
Because that's what everyone's last thought is. What did he do at the end?
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah. Also, though, I feel like you got to come out in the beginning and, like, you know, hit them in the mouth. Yeah. Because they're sitting there going, all right, what do you got now? So you got to come out there and kind of blast them with some. Some juice right up.
Tom Segura
Big shot at the Garden. Let's see. Yeah. How about this guy? You ever seen something like this?
Christina P.
What, is he trying to rub the fat out of his ear?
Tom Segura
I think he's got, like, a tumor in his face.
Christina P.
That's not how you do it. Okay. Okay. That's cancer. You can't rub cancer.
Tom Segura
You can. You can rub it out if you do it hard enough. He's in a lot of pain. That looks like it hurts. So his whole body is. You gotta give it to them, though. They really don't around in Asia. They just are like, just deal with it, dude. Stop the crying.
Sebastian Maniscalco
All right.
Christina P.
This is like, Kyrgyzstan.
Sebastian Maniscalco
So here's an example of. So this video.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Did. Did you see the video? Like, I feel like.
Tom Segura
I feel like I've seen this one. Yeah, this is.
Sebastian Maniscalco
This Is on your feed.
Tom Segura
Yeah, my algorithm.
Sebastian Maniscalco
My feet don't look like that.
Tom Segura
So here's the thing. Yours is probably just like, oh, here's a car. Right? Or like, what are you looking, six.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Places to go see in Italy while you're on vacation. I'm not getting Asian rub outs.
Tom Segura
Oh, yeah, I get a lot of.
Christina P.
Not even. This is the beginning. Oh, no.
Tom Segura
What the.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Come on. I just ate.
Tom Segura
What's he doing? I don't even understand.
Christina P.
I don't like that.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Okay, so give me like the behind the scenes on this. So you posted. Have you ever posted a video like this? Right?
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And the people in the video see it on your show.
Tom Segura
That's.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Sure. And call and text or whatever and.
Tom Segura
Say sometimes they go, thanks for highlighting me. Or like, I would like to. Come on now. Can you please book me? And sometimes they go, you didn't ask for permission. You get every type of answer and.
Sebastian Maniscalco
You'Re not phased by any of it coming in. And nothing. Doesn't even.
Christina P.
It's been so long.
Tom Segura
No, it's 14.
Christina P.
We've been doing this for so long. We know what we're doing.
Sebastian Maniscalco
If I could just comment, which I've never seen this before. This is kind of like a little behind the scenes info for your fans. And I don't know if anybody's ever brought it up, but prior to coming in here, I used your restroom. And I don't know whose idea was this, but there is dental floss in there, Q tips, chapsticks, eye drops, and something that I actually brought in here and I had a take, which I've never seen this before. And I'm really into hospitality and I'm really into little touches.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Christina P.
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Got your own mint.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
This is beautiful.
Tom Segura
You like that?
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, I saw that. And the first thing I said is, wow, they're doing well. And then I tried one just to see what the quality was. And I gotta tell you, delicious. Wow. Let me know where you go and get this. Like what? How?
Tom Segura
Who?
Sebastian Maniscalco
Who? Start who? There was a meeting. Someone had to have a meeting.
Tom Segura
Someone had. Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And someone said we should have our own mints.
Tom Segura
Yeah, that's true. That's true.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Who decided this?
Tom Segura
That's a great question. Oh, God. It was straight from the top.
Christina P.
It was Ryan.
Tom Segura
Ryan's like when he's mince, he's.
Christina P.
Ryan gets it. Yeah, but this is. But do you see how special it was for you? We wanted you. Sebastian Maniscalco, who flew all the way from LA to Austin to feel special. Well, I Do, and I hope you do.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I do. I mean, it's really nice what you got set up here. You got a mural out there. You got.
Tom Segura
Got our own mints.
Sebastian Maniscalco
You got your own mints. You got this. Which I keep seeing at every pod. We have a podcast, and Liquid Death hasn't contacted us at all.
Tom Segura
I want to show you this one right before we show your special thing. This is. I remember seeing this one that I really enjoyed, too.
Sebastian Maniscalco
You're gonna shoot me?
Tom Segura
This guy's doing fingers. Okay.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Are you actually gonna shoot me?
Tom Segura
That old guy is.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, but you're gonna shoot me. He said he was doing trigger fingers like he's a gangster. Have I got a gun?
Tom Segura
But why are you touching my. Don't come there.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Don't come here, you brav. Listen, look, I'm not a bully, right? But I'm like three times the size of you. Yeah, but don't touch my car. Hit my car, bro. Don't do that.
Tom Segura
Okay, hold on. So this guy. What appears is the guy's in his car, and this guy's being an. For whatever reason, the guy outside of the car.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Don't do that. Because this car is worth.
Tom Segura
Now he's, like, sitting on his car, touching his car, man. Don't do that. Don't. Don't do that. You've got no money.
Unknown Guest
I've got.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Okay, I'm gonna do this, right?
Tom Segura
I'm gonna do this. Okay, I've taken a picture.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I'm gonna take your glasses now. Oh, and now these are glasses that.
Tom Segura
You damage in my crops. Look at this guy.
Sebastian Maniscalco
How's that? How's that? How's that? How's that?
Tom Segura
Yeah, that's the look of defeated, you know, you're like, oh, yeah, I fucked up.
Christina P.
We know what a pain in the ass it is to get new fucking.
Tom Segura
Oh, yeah. He just. I mean. And that guy's also processing. I definitely. Those are not redeemable. Like, those are completely crushed. And also, I did this. Like, Yeah, I. Nothing there was. This was totally avoidable. I would have glasses right now if I hadn't with this guy. That's just a good. Don't.
Christina P.
Don't start shitless in McRocks. He points it out, too. He's like, it was me. Crocs. All right, are you ready? This is the best part for me of the show.
Tom Segura
Be clear for her.
Christina P.
I love this. I curate tick tocks. This is for my algorithm. Like I said earlier, I like to highlight people that don't have a voice or the marginalized communities so what, by.
Tom Segura
The way, is there. What's, like, the darkness of a Sebastian? You know what I mean? Like, what. What. What is it? There's got to be something in there that is, like, somewhat dark. Right? Like, our feed shows us our own darkness.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I mean, I like watching people fight in. Yeah.
Tom Segura
Really?
Sebastian Maniscalco
That's.
Tom Segura
So this is good for you.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Some of my. Yeah. So, like, I was hoping that this guy would have went into a rage.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And you would have seen, like, a croc fly off the camera.
Tom Segura
Yeah, yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And beat the shit out of that guy.
Tom Segura
Okay.
Sebastian Maniscalco
So I guess.
Tom Segura
Okay. I like.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I like. I like that when it comes to, like, entertainment. Entertainment. Like, how it all goes down. I don't know if that's dark. It's just.
Christina P.
Do you like fighting and aggression?
Sebastian Maniscalco
I. Not aggressive at all, but I do. Like when other people kind of go toe to toe.
Christina P.
Yeah.
Tom Segura
Yeah, I like that.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah.
Christina P.
Yeah. Who doesn't?
Tom Segura
Okay, fun. Here's Christina's curations.
Christina P.
I thought you. This one's for you tomorrow. All the cupping. Look at all the cupping.
Tom Segura
Breathing. He's already in pain right now. I like when they really. When they really came around. Yeah. When the mallet comes dropping, is that.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Are you guys into all this? Like, do you do cupping and ice? Are you in an ice bath?
Tom Segura
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And, like, give me the vibe. Like, when you go in. Sucks and. Yeah. And then you come out.
Tom Segura
Feel great.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Do you. Yeah, I. I get it. But, like, generally speaking, throughout the day, if you didn't do the ice.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Would you go, I'm off, bro. I didn't do my ice today, actually.
Tom Segura
Kind of. I wouldn't say it's so dramatic where it's like black and white, but, like, I remember when I came in here, like, if. I don't know. Was it last week?
Christina P.
Yeah.
Tom Segura
And I came right from it. These guys were like, damn, you're in a good mood. And I was, like, straight out of the bath, baby. Like, I was. I was just firing on all cylinders. I was feeling good about it.
Christina P.
Yeah. And then he brags about it. He likes. He has to tell me that he did the bath.
Tom Segura
Why? Because I know that she tell her.
Sebastian Maniscalco
You did the bath and how long you did it for.
Tom Segura
Well, it's always the same.
Christina P.
He would have me time him sometimes.
Tom Segura
Yeah, she doesn't really do that either. She's like. She'll be like, it's cold outside. I'm like, you're not even getting in the water.
Sebastian Maniscalco
What's the tempest right now?
Tom Segura
It's at 45.
Sebastian Maniscalco
45.
Tom Segura
But I don't know. I've gone down to 40, and I've gone up to 50. I don't know. I think right in the middle works for me.
Sebastian Maniscalco
45.
Tom Segura
It's good.
Christina P.
What do you think?
Tom Segura
Have you tried it?
Christina P.
You gonna do it?
Sebastian Maniscalco
I got. I got one start, you know, that's been there for a year. I was diligent with it for a little bit, but then.
Tom Segura
Did you like the. How you felt after I.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Did I. There is a sense of euphoria when you get out of it.
Tom Segura
There is.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I'm just. I was doing it more for, like. Does it. Does it heal inflammation?
Tom Segura
Oh, yeah.
Christina P.
Interesting.
Sebastian Maniscalco
So from what I understand, and I.
Tom Segura
Don'T help with it.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I don't do a lot of research.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Do you guys do a lot of research on stuff?
Tom Segura
Somebody just says something once.
Sebastian Maniscalco
That's probably true.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Christina P.
I just do what Joe Rogan tells me.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, you hear that, Joe?
Tom Segura
And you're like, all right, Dr. Huberman. Got it. So we just got word that Tanner is the one who deserves credit for the custom mints.
Christina P.
Tanner Banana.
Tom Segura
This is blowing my mind.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, good for you. Yeah, yeah, Solid move.
Tom Segura
My phone's been blown up since I.
Christina P.
Said it was Ryan. They're like, no, it was Tanner.
Tom Segura
Don't take that from him. Please take that credit away from Ryan and give it to Tanner.
Christina P.
This is how I travel as a Covid conscious person. First, I use Kovixel nasal spray before going to the airport, and I mask in the Uber, of course. And I always mask in the airport. When I get on the plane, I wipe down as much as I can with Clorox wipes, and I use my pure enrichment air purifier for the plane. I wait a little bit to eat after everyone else gets their snacks, and I plan to do as much of my activities outside as possible. When I get home, I wear a mask and test a few days in a row, and that is that.
Tom Segura
First of all, nothing. If you did a version of this video, I don't think anything could ever perform better. There's nothing would ever get more views than if you did a direct duplication of this video.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Oh, wow. I mean, do people do this? It's fascinating what people are doing online. Are they doing this to actually be helpful? Are they doing this to be, quote, unquote, famous? What is the per. Like, If I had a routine like this, you would never know about it.
Tom Segura
Right, right.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I would never go and share it with anybody. Right, Right. The mindset here is It. I'm.
Tom Segura
I mean, I think part of that is you get your attention in other ways. You have a talent and you get to do. And like you get your fill from that somebody else. Like this person doesn't have that outlet. There's no. So it's like this is how they put this.
Sebastian Maniscalco
That's the way it's supposed to be. Of course, the talent, you get the attention, but when you don't have it, you don't get to get it.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
You know what I'm saying?
Tom Segura
But now you're like, yeah, but she's like, yeah, but I want it. So I'll do this. I'll do this montage of how I. How I travel as a Covid conscious person with the end. And I like that. I get home and I test several times for a few days.
Christina P.
And her nose was so red. Fucking idiot. And also hate it so much.
Tom Segura
You know what she's looking for here is somebody go, thanks for doing that. Thanks for the tutorial on how to live this way. I wear a mask.
Christina P.
So you wear a mask.
Tom Segura
I. I'm protecting you. Why aren't you protecting me? I saw this old broad say that to this guy in Brentwood when I was like, during the COVID heyday. She came on, she had like. Like, she was a welder, like a mask around, wrapped around the head. And this guy was like walking up, she goes, I'm protecting you. Why aren't you protecting me? He's like, I'm outside, I'm about to walk in.
Christina P.
Yeah. Hysteria.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Sarah.
Unknown Guest
The favorite thing to do is just sometimes when it's done, washing, basically when.
Tom Segura
A dog eats a snake.
Sebastian Maniscalco
It'S like cooking burrito on the floor.
Tom Segura
Butter. You just gotta make.
Sebastian Maniscalco
You just gotta make sure. Wash it off the roof and you.
Tom Segura
Put it in your laundry basket. That's the end of the video.
Sebastian Maniscalco
So now I'm understanding why the kids are not on any of your social media.
Tom Segura
Right.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I would be even afraid to put this thing up. This guy's out there.
Tom Segura
He's out there.
Christina P.
Yeah.
Tom Segura
You know, you don't really see the tats on. On the freckled people that much. That's one of the things that stood out to me, is how many freckles he has. And then you go. You don't really see somebody really tatted up who's got a lot of prevalent freckles.
Christina P.
This is so true, Tom. And you know what we found too is there's a direct correlation, Sebastian, between facial tattoos and crystal meth use.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Really?
Christina P.
It's a direct to getting facial tattoos.
Tom Segura
Although I'm sensing some fentanyl here. I don't think it's just meth.
Christina P.
Oh, interesting.
Tom Segura
Because he's a little too like most meth people would be like, you gotta fucking throw it in the laundry.
Christina P.
That's. And to answer your question, like, are we afraid we put this up? The guy might. They don't live long enough to come after you. All these guys on the walls, they're not really around anymore. Except for that fat red haired one.
Tom Segura
Oh my God.
Christina P.
What? He's around.
Tom Segura
He's around. That's it.
Christina P.
Everyone else is around. Oh, Tommy Johnson, he's around too. Oh yeah. Rpc.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Christina P.
Well, the rest. No Jesus to describe Jesus's horse. Yes. He's extremely tall, very well muscled.
Tom Segura
This horse's personality is often very serious, which is foil to Jesus's personality, which is often laughing. Not always. Jesus knows when to be serious, when.
Christina P.
To carry out missions and when to work essentially.
Tom Segura
But Jesus is often really loving life joyful. And his horse is pretty much always serious. And a few weeks ago I got to visit with both of them and Jesus was with his horse and I got to ride with Jesus on this horse in the spirit.
Christina P.
These are experiences I'm having spiritually and saw the horse turn around.
Tom Segura
Okay, so I think we get it.
Christina P.
Well, have you ever thought about the qualities of Jesus's horse? What? The personality might be serious.
Tom Segura
Isn't it kind of interesting that you go like, oh yeah, all these people are out there. Like the face tat guy, Jesus's horse lady. Like they're all out there. This is all in our. This is person. This lady could be next to you at Starbucks.
Sebastian Maniscalco
No, they're out there, they're living and you are showcasing them. All right.
Christina P.
Behind me is the royal procession. King Richard himself and his queen are walking by.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yes. Every sauce and they walk through the.
Unknown Guest
Fairgrounds just to greet the populace. And of course this is just a restaurant fair. He's not a real king, but we still pay deference to him.
Tom Segura
We as part.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Since we are getting into character for.
Tom Segura
A medieval restaurant fair.
Sebastian Maniscalco
We do.
Tom Segura
I think I've seen him in the belly room. This guy.
Christina P.
I'm going to throw up.
Tom Segura
It's the, the Ding Dong show.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Ding Dong, Ding Dong show. Yeah.
Tom Segura
Do you realize too, like I was talking to Kirk Fox about this, like how on a lot of nights you're at the, the Comedy Store and you're standing in the hallway and you, you know, you see, maybe you see like somebody you know or A fan walks by and then you see some of the other comics and you're like, oh, this is a mental asylum. Like, there's so many lunatics in this. Like, this guy would fit right in. He was like, oh, I'm doing a spot. He's like, oh, yeah, sure. I was the king's lair today. You would think that he's like, he, he fit right into our world.
Christina P.
Like, oh, that's why I love him.
Tom Segura
Yeah. Like, this is a peer of mine.
Christina P.
Yeah. What do you think?
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, no. Well, it's like we go to work, right? And these are our co workers.
Tom Segura
Yeah, totally, totally.
Christina P.
Hold on. Sebastian, have you come across the Disney adult phenomenon?
Sebastian Maniscalco
Oh. Where adult people go to Disneyland?
Tom Segura
Do you not have children on this? Because it feels like you should.
Christina P.
I know.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Well, they make the shirts. Rope droppers. What is it?
Tom Segura
Rope droppers.
Sebastian Maniscalco
What's a rope dropper?
Tom Segura
A rope dropper is somebody. Cuz. What's the other one?
Christina P.
A park closer.
Tom Segura
So a rope dropper is the person who waits until they open the park, in other words.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Oh, wow.
Tom Segura
So they're there at like five in the morning, and they're like, just waiting until they go, now it's open. And then the park closer is the person who goes until they're like, you got to get the out of here. It's midnight. You got to go home.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah.
Tom Segura
So there's, there's, there's, you know, both sides of it.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Both sides. Is, is, is, is the same person. Could they be two?
Tom Segura
Usually not usually. They're pretty crips in the bloods, you know, it's totally different.
Christina P.
It identifies you as a morning person or an evening person, basically. What are you? Are you a park closer or rope dropper?
Sebastian Maniscalco
I. If I had to choose, yeah, I'd be a park closer.
Tom Segura
But as a dad.
Sebastian Maniscalco
As a dad, it's kind of. We come at 10.
Tom Segura
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
And we leave at 10:50.
Tom Segura
Yeah, exactly.
Christina P.
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I don't know if you guys.
Tom Segura
Good. The crazy thing was, last time we went, we took. We're like, all right, we make this big trip, go to Disneyland. Literally. They're like, at 10, you know, walking around, pay for the extra privilege of things. And then first thing we get on, and then my kids like, can we go? Like, can we go? He's like, yeah. I go, we fucking flew out here to do this. He's like, all right. Just couldn't be less amused by any of it.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Well, listen, I was, I went. I remember going to Epcot Center. They took me to Epcot when I was 10. And they were so excited. My parents like, hey, we're going to Italy and then we're going to Spain. This and that and the other thing. I'm like, let's get the out of here.
Tom Segura
Yeah, Boring.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I didn't want to be there.
Christina P.
Yeah. It's my dream. It was my dream. Not Ellis.
Tom Segura
Exactly.
Christina P.
Now, I'm gonna ask you this. This is a Renaissance fair. Would you rather be a Renaissance fair adult, like this gentleman, or a Disney adult?
Sebastian Maniscalco
I never liked the Renaissance fair.
Tom Segura
Disgusting.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Never liked it.
Tom Segura
I'm with you.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Just a weird vibe.
Tom Segura
I'd rather have a year pass to Disney. A Renaissance fair for an afternoon, for sure.
Christina P.
There's pavement at Disneyland. You're just walking on filthy dirt. There's. I don't know how they go to the bathroom.
Tom Segura
Also the fact that everybody who's really into this is so into the roleplay aspect.
Christina P.
So into it.
Tom Segura
Like, you meet these psychos who are, like, really into characters at Disney, but there's also just people like, oh, this is a fun environment, but these guys are seriously like, m'lady.
Christina P.
Yeah. Yeah.
Tom Segura
Do you. Do you have the right instrument to open this door with? Like, they. They're. They're too involved. They're too psychotic.
Christina P.
It makes me nervous. And they're like, did you get your turkey leg? Like, they like to eat the big leg.
Tom Segura
It's too confused. What's this?
Sebastian Maniscalco
What is it?
Tom Segura
What was that? I don't know. Ask her.
Christina P.
It's just a cool video. I don't know. It's a guy on Tick Tock.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, but what is. Where is he? At his house?
Christina P.
He's got VHS tapes and he's got a Tigger the Tiger.
Tom Segura
He's got some dolls and poor lighting and poor framing. He's perfect for the show. Thank you, Christina. That one was seriously disturbing. In America, you can catch Sebastian on the It Ain't Right tour.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Now.
Tom Segura
Check him out on season two of Bookie this December. Did you like that song?
Sebastian Maniscalco
See, this is. This is. We grew up. We had home videos. Right?
Tom Segura
Right.
Sebastian Maniscalco
You did home videos and nobody saw them?
Tom Segura
Those stay at home. I know. That's true. That's a great point.
Sebastian Maniscalco
No, home. Home videos make it on your show. It's amazing.
Tom Segura
You know, my favorite is there's a whole lane. We have a literal library of guys, usually guys who turn the recording on and they just kind of. They look in the lens and they upload that. They just upload because they don't know how. They don't know what's going on. They don't know that they're recording. And then they just see share and they're like, share. And they just post it. And it's just them staring at the lens. There's thousands of them. Wow.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah. This is a whole other world.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, it's. It's a shame.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Unknown Guest
I mean, you want to see me naked, man? Oh, you got to ask, man. I'm here, man. All you have to do is ask, man.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Already.
Unknown Guest
But say I'm the eternal stud, guys. Just ask me that. Yeah, just ask me that. I'm the eternal stud. Just ask me. You want to see no clothes, anytime, anywhere. You know where to come. That's right. Either come and now. That's right. And I don't forget now. Do you like it? Do you like the hot dogs in the bun or you like it straight up? That's right. So we don't see me.
Tom Segura
I've been in a hotel room with him. Isn't that crazy?
Sebastian Maniscalco
You have?
Tom Segura
Yeah, yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
What? He can't. He. He. He was on the show.
Tom Segura
Yeah, yeah, he's been on the show right there.
Sebastian Maniscalco
So. So what's. What's the vibe here? Does this guy work?
Christina P.
Oh, boy. Should we show him what the vibe is?
Tom Segura
I don't know if he can. If he can work. This is how we discovered him.
Unknown Guest
Black guys would love to and good. You're a hot black guy and you want to me at 23.95. If you want to move in, you can move in, but you gotta me. I need to you a lot, man. Get r. Free food, free rent and everything else, man. Here's a deal, man. Men from jail, homeless, or you're a thug. You want to come move in? A friend come too, man. Free rent. You can at least in a key. Me? Piss on me. Beat me. I'm home. Now you see me want to come over today and try it out? Try it out, man.
Tom Segura
Yeah, that's how we found him. And then he's just been like, you know, doing stuff since up.
Unknown Guest
The total pig. Yeah, total pig off. Comes up is officer comes up, likes it wild, dirty and filthy.
Tom Segura
And he's just been posting videos for a long time.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Guys, guys in the booth. How. How do you feel about. You feel about this guy?
Tom Segura
We knew what we signed up for.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Yeah, I know, but like, inviting him. Like, were you there in the hotel room when like, was. Was there a security there?
Tom Segura
Did we have security? I was not there.
Sebastian Maniscalco
You got mint, though. No security.
Christina P.
We think he's relatively harmless.
Tom Segura
Looking back, he's the. He's. I mean, we've had multiple run ins with him. You know, he's somebody.
Unknown Guest
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm gonna come. I'm gonna come now. I'm coming.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Oh, come on. What the are we watching?
Tom Segura
This is YouTube. It's on his YouTube.
Christina P.
This is on YouTube.
Tom Segura
This is on YouTube. Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
They don't take this down.
Tom Segura
So. Bro.
Christina P.
I think I want Sebastian on every show. Your disgust makes me so happy. This makes me so fun.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I'm stunned. I am stunned that this is going on.
Tom Segura
You want to give him a call? He has a multiple number.
Unknown Guest
Welcome to Lucifer's life. I'm your host, RPC man. And we are here at 2395 Wagner House of Proper 2C Building at 124th Amherst Avenue, east side of Harlem. That's right, guys. You hear me right loud. I am here at 917-353-2913 or 347-281-3156 or 616-241-8615 or 646373? It's not 917. 91735.
Tom Segura
Okay, so there's multiple numbers. You can always reach out.
Christina P.
Remember when he would upload his videos and the title would be like extra.
Tom Segura
Like web code? Yeah. That's an awesome time. I remember that. Yeah. Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Wow.
Tom Segura
So much.
Christina P.
It does nothing for you, huh?
Sebastian Maniscalco
Well, you know, tickle your funny bone. It's. I. I see where you could find this entertaining. I see it.
Tom Segura
Yeah.
Sebastian Maniscalco
But I look at it and I don't feel good.
Tom Segura
Yeah, I understand that.
Sebastian Maniscalco
This is eye opening.
Christina P.
Yeah, this is eye opening. You could be adding all this cool stuff to your show.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Oh, my God.
Christina P.
So what do you and Pete Corially talk about then?
Sebastian Maniscalco
We just talk about, like our personal and professional lives. Just kind of two buddies talking.
Tom Segura
It's just a sound effect. Oh, okay.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I thought he called in.
Unknown Guest
Yeah, I'm gonna come.
Christina P.
Oh, that was rough. Every time.
Sebastian Maniscalco
I found this very entertaining. It was very entertaining.
Tom Segura
Now, we love Sebastian. If you. If you haven't, you gotta see Sebastian live. He is really one of the best in the game. And check him out in season two of Bookie this December. Thanks for coming in, man.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Thanks for having me.
Tom Segura
Always fun to appreciate it.
Sebastian Maniscalco
Nice seeing you.
Unknown Guest
Black guys who love the. The black guys who love the. The black guys who love the.
Tom Segura
The.
Unknown Guest
This beep beep, beep be. Black guys who love the. The black guys who love the. The black guys who love the black guys. The black guys love the good black guys who love the black guys who love the black guys who love the black guys who love the good if you're a hot black guy and you want to me at 20395 if you want to move in you can move in but you gotta if you want to move in you can move in but you got to I need, I need you if you want to move in you can move in but you got me if you want to move in you can move in but you got to I need, I need you a lot.
Tom Segura
Hey, you just watched an episode of your mom's house. I hope you enjoyed it. And if not, watch another one. Maybe you'll like that one. They're everywhere. Look. I don't know. Replace them in, like, cubes or squares or whatever this is. Just click another one. Maybe you'll find one you like or someone will get hurt. And everybody likes that. Don't forget to subscribe.
Podcast Summary: "Embrace The Chaos w/ Sebastian Maniscalco | YMH Ep. 782"
Introduction
In episode 782 of Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura, hosts Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura welcome their longtime friend and fellow comedian, Sebastian Maniscalco. The episode, released on October 23, 2024, delves into Sebastian's experiences in the comedy world, his perspectives on the evolution of stand-up, and the intricate balance between personal life and career demands. The trio engages in a candid and humorous conversation, enriched with insightful anecdotes and relatable humor.
Guest Introduction: Sebastian Maniscalco
The episode kicks off with warm introductions as Tom Segura announces his own upcoming shows before turning the spotlight to Sebastian Maniscalco.
Tom Segura [00:00]: "Tickets are available now for my upcoming November shows... Welcomes Sebastian Maniscalco, everybody."
Sebastian expresses his gratitude for being part of the show, highlighting their long-standing friendship.
Sebastian Maniscalco [01:05]: "Thank you for having me here. We've been friends for a while."
Discussion of Comedy Tours and Experiences
The conversation transitions to Sebastian's experiences on various comedy tours, notably his "It Ain't Right" tour and a memorable stint in South Africa.
Tom Segura [04:09]: "And that's actually when you had popped. Because I remember what would happen was... everyone knew Sabat."
Sebastian recounts the overwhelming response he received from Italian audiences, particularly in venues like Jones Beach, where the crowd's energy significantly impacted the show's atmosphere.
Sebastian Maniscalco [05:19]: "Oh, Jones Beach. Yeah."
They discuss the dynamics of performing in different regions, with Sebastian sharing humorous insights about dealing with diverse audiences.
Furthermore, the hosts reminisce about their joint tour experiences in South Africa, emphasizing the unique challenges and cultural nuances they encountered.
Tom Segura [07:00]: "Nando's Chicken had a tour. Yeah, yeah, it was. It was really fun."
Relationships and Comedic Camaraderie
Sebastian highlights the camaraderie within the comedy community, acknowledging that the perceived support often masks underlying competition.
Sebastian Maniscalco [14:48]: "It seems like it's on the surface."
Christina and Tom agree, discussing how genuine support tends to exist primarily among close friends and the broader landscape is more competitive.
Christina P. [15:12]: "I will say, hard work always trumps even the shittiest personality in our business."
The Evolution of Comedy and Modern Challenges
A significant portion of the discussion centers around how the comedy scene has evolved with the advent of social media and podcasting. Sebastian questions whether modern comedians prioritize creating viral content over honing their craft in clubs.
Sebastian Maniscalco [20:09]: "Do you think that there is... are comedians that are spending the amount of time in the comedy clubs honing their actual... or are people just worried about pumping out videos and podcasts?"
Tom responds by acknowledging the shift in paths available to comedians today, noting that the traditional club support system has diminished.
Tom Segura [20:34]: "It's a different path. We also can't think in terms of just how we did it because what's available today was not available to us."
Christina concurs, pointing out that the traditional club support acts are no longer as influential.
Christina P. [21:04]: "And I don't think the club support feature acts as much anymore."
Personal Lives and Family
Transitioning to personal topics, Sebastian and Tom discuss the challenges of balancing a demanding career with family life. Sebastian shares his intentional efforts to keep his children away from social media, ensuring their privacy and normalcy.
Sebastian Maniscalco [23:35]: "You do a really great job on keeping your kids off social media."
Tom elaborates on their decision to maintain privacy, emphasizing the desire to protect their children from online chaos.
Tom Segura [23:45]: "They don't see us on YouTube. They don't see anything. Really?"
Christina adds her perspective on travel, highlighting her meticulous approach to COVID-19 safety measures during the pandemic.
Christina P. [52:26]: "So now I'm understanding why the kids are not on any of your social media."
Social Media and Content Sharing
The hosts explore the impact of social media on personal privacy and content sharing. They discuss the repercussions of allowing unfiltered content to be shared online, using humorous yet cautionary tales of interactions with online personalities.
A notable segment features their playful critique of content creators, including an enigmatic character referred to as "RPC man," whose erratic online presence sparks laughter and disbelief.
Tom Segura [66:35]: "He's out there."
Sebastian Maniscalco [66:51]: "Guys, guys in the booth. How do you feel about this guy?"
Christina reflects on the nature of their content curation, emphasizing the importance of highlighting marginalized communities while navigating the chaotic realm of online interactions.
Christina P. [27:41]: "People that you don't get a voice. That's how we see it."
Embracing Creativity and Change
Sebastian and Tom discuss the necessity of adapting their stand-up routines to keep them fresh and engaging. They share strategies for rearranging or introducing new bits to maintain audience interest and prevent performance monotony.
Tom Segura [41:24]: "The only thing that ever cures that is either a new order or a new bit."
Christina shares her admiration for Sebastian's comedic approach, particularly his ability to highlight the absurdities of everyday life.
Christina P. [30:02]: "Which is interesting with you, Sebastian, because I feel like you're an upholder of the opposite of, like, what the is wrong with everybody?"
Humor and Human Behavior
A recurring theme is the exploration of human behavior through humor. The trio delves into amusing observations about societal norms, personal quirks, and the often chaotic nature of modern life.
Tom Segura [34:20]: "He was like, what the fuck? Specifically. Yeah, your mom. Yeah, all right."
They also engage in light-hearted banter about common comedic tropes and shared experiences within the industry.
Tom Segura [38:59]: "I wish we could do stand up at like 3pm yeah, that is funny. Why can't we?"
Conclusion
The episode concludes with heartfelt appreciation for Sebastian's contributions to the comedy scene and the enduring friendship among the hosts. They encourage listeners to support Sebastian's upcoming projects and reflect on the importance of maintaining personal connections amidst the ever-evolving landscape of entertainment.
Tom Segura [69:03]: "It's just a sound effect. Oh, okay."
Sebastian Maniscalco [69:16]: "This is eye opening."
The hosts wrap up with typical humor, inviting listeners to subscribe and continue engaging with their diverse content offerings.
Notable Quotes
Sebastian Maniscalco [01:07]: "We've been friends for a while."
Tom Segura [06:20]: "If you can call your shot on this thing, right before intermission is the best spot."
Christina P. [15:12]: "I will say, hard work always trumps even the shittiest personality in our business."
Sebastian Maniscalco [20:09]: "Do you think that there is... are comedians that are spending the amount of time in the comedy clubs honing their actual... or are people just worried about pumping out videos and podcasts?"
Christina P. [27:41]: "People that you don't get a voice. That's how we see it."
Tom Segura [38:59]: "I wish we could do stand up at like 3pm yeah, that is funny. Why can't we?"
Christina P. [45:31]: "Got your own mint. This is beautiful."
Final Thoughts
Your Mom's House continues to deliver engaging and relatable content, seamlessly blending humor with meaningful discussions. Episode 782 with Sebastian Maniscalco exemplifies the show's ability to provide both laughter and thoughtful insights, making it a must-listen for fans and newcomers alike.