The King Of Stink | Your Mom's House Ep. 830

Summary

Podcast Summary: The King Of Stink | Your Mom's House Ep. 830

Podcast: Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura
Episode Title: The King Of Stink
Release Date: October 1, 2025
Hosts: Christina Pazsitzky ("Christina P.") & Tom Segura
Studio: YMH Studios

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Overview

This episode of Your Mom's House is a classic blend of unfiltered comedic banter, marital ribbing, and the deeply weird internet content that Tom and Christina have cultivated as their trademark. The central theme navigates the worlds of hygiene (and lack thereof) across global cultures, body odor rankings, public rudeness, and family-style oversharing. Along the way, the pair riff on everything from makeup launches and pharmacy woes, to the nuances of gay sex etiquette and the comedic shortcomings in porn acting.

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Key Discussion Points & Segments

1. Seasonal Updates & Christina's Makeup Launch (01:31 – 04:14)

• Christina celebrates the arrival of October, dubbing it her favorite, “witchy” month.
• She enthusiastically previews her new fall cosmetics line: Nocturne liquid lipstick, a shimmer gloss (“Whimsy Kiss Gloss” in “Just Like Honey”), and a “Velvet Crush Blush.”
• Christina stresses her commitment to quality, having the products crafted in Italy and personally tested:

  “I hand select them. They’re special… because I wear them. Try it out.” (03:24 - Christina)

• Tom helpfully pitches the makeup as a tool in the male date-night arsenal:

  “If you’re a dude trying to get some strange, trying to get your tip licked… buy ladies little gifts like that.” (03:03 - Tom)

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2. Alpha Male Threats & Internet Weirdness (04:21 – 10:18)

• Playing a viral video, Tom jokes about sizing up potential threats as a man, definitively posturing:

  “I will fuck you up. I’ll beat the shit out of you. I’m 100% certain of it.” (05:03 - Tom)

• Christina wonders about the wisdom of such online threats. They dissect the “Frankie Fardy” meme—someone whose pink-eye look inspires fart jokes (“farted in his eyes”), leading to a running “Fart King” gag.
• The duo gently roast the bizarre online personalities and lament "threat culture," with Christina offering pseudo-compassion:

  “I just feel a little bad for the guy, you know, I just don’t want to add to the, you know…” (10:26 - Christina)

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3. Alpha Women & Personal Combat Stories (07:04 – 08:49)

• Christina probes how Tom felt being play-fought by “Little Monster,” a 5’1” professional female fighter:

  “What does it feel like to touch a woman that’s, like, strong like that?” (07:41 - Christina)

• Tom:

  “You’re not really touching her as so much as just trying to hold on for dear life…” (07:45)

• Christina floats the idea of being alpha in the bedroom; Tom is patently unconvinced.

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4. Competing for “Fart King” & Spousal Flatulence (13:43 – 15:20)

• Tom defends his title as YMH’s “Fart King,” with Christina recounting times when Tom’s gas affected work logistics.
• A highlight:

  “Brother, what kind of relationship do we have that you can’t be like, yo, that was dope, man…?” (15:07 - Tom)

• Christina, ever the pragmatist:

  “I ain’t gonna breathe that air that you’re trying to force me to breathe.” (14:48)

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5. Tom’s Big Time Blacks (BTB) Encounters & Racial Banter (15:24 – 19:52)

• Tom recounts mingling with Black celebrities at a fight in Vegas (“BTBs of BTBs”—Chappelle, Marshawn Lynch, Mike Tyson, etc.).
• The comfort of being recognized by Mike Tyson:

  “He goes, Segura. And I go, yeah. He goes, it’s good to see you, man.” (17:05)

• Christina and Tom riff on the different ways white and Black people interact around the “N-word,” poking fun at clueless old white guys:

  “How come they can say it?” / “That’s always the problem whites have with it.” (20:51 - Christina)

• Explores Marshawn Lynch’s unique way of grabbing attention as a photographer with blunt vocal stylings.

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6. Pharmacy Etiquette, Public Annoyances, and Speakerphone Rage (21:26 – 25:58)

• Christina’s pharmacy woes—having to pay $5 for Prozac due to insurance, feeling solidarity with unruly patrons.
• Both vent about “important” people making business calls loudly in public and the specific public speakerphone/jam-blasting behaviors stratified by gender and race.
• A running gag develops about the apex of public rudeness, with Tom describing the “levels” of speaker use:

  “BTB is bringing out the JBL and then putting it on that. That’s real BTB.” (22:58 - Tom)

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7. Who Smells the Worst? A Global BO Showdown (29:14 – 45:48)

• Launches into a lengthy, hilarious discussion about cultural differences in body odor, referencing a Reddit list of smelliest countries (Vietnam, Philippines, Iran, Eastern Europe, Germany, France, USA, etc.).
• Christina’s direct experience with Eastern European BO (“you go there, my God, in the summertime, and it’s a nightmare” - 29:54).
• Tom’s praise for best-smelling folks:

  “Best smelling people… in my experience in America, it’s Black women.” (31:15 - Tom)
  “Latin women never smell bad. The dudes… are all into like cologne.” (33:03 - Tom)

• Christina’s anecdote:

  “Marlon Wayans… smelled like a dream… he used, I think, Aveda hair stuff.” (34:07)

• The pair explore the link between cuisine, climate, hygiene norms, and deodorant usage (“deodorant is a western invention”).

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8. Sexual Honesty in the Gay Community (50:41 – 53:04)

• Listener email prompts discussion about gay “tops” versus “bottoms” and whether honesty about “douching” (preparing for anal) is required.
• Christina:

  “I might lie too… let’s say I can’t get around to anal douching, but I really like you…” (51:27)

• They muse on sexual etiquette, risk, and bodily realities, laughing about the nitty-gritty.

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9. Code-switching, Stereotypes, and Culture Talk (53:34 – 54:41)

• Christina and Tom dissect "code switching" in voices and behaviors—talking gay, Valley girls, appropriating Black vocabulary, etc.
• Christina reflects how vocal and visual cues give away someone's identity or orientation.

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10. Listener Queries & “Napkin Pants” Debate (48:16 – 50:28)

• Christina admits to using her jeans as napkins (“napkin pants”), sparking listener emails arguing the hygiene risks.
• Tom sides with the listener ("You're queer and it's disgusting"), while Christina is unapologetic.

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11. Porn Acting Critique & Workshop Proposal (57:09 – 62:12)

• The married pair watch and critique gay porn acting for authenticity and scene “emotional arcs.”
• Christina:

  “Just one acting class is all these guys would need…” (57:09)

• Tom contemplates running a porno script/scene study workshop.

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12. Ending on Ass Play & Licking (63:47 – Episode End)

• Listener asks “Why is it gay for a man to enjoy his ass being licked by a woman?” sparking a rapid-fire musical riff:

  “What you heard me, I’m an ass-muh…”

• Christina:

  “Would you wax it?”

• Tom:

  “Yeah, yeah.” (65:22)

• The couple, true to tradition, close on a high/low note about marital rimming.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• Best summary of YMH, ever:
  “I mean, listen, I’ve been wiping my hands on my pants lately…” (48:16 - Christina)

• On Eastern European stank:
  “It’s like a smell buffet.” (30:35 - Christina)

• On hygiene as identity:
  “Best smelling people, in my experience in America, it’s Black women.” (31:15 - Tom)

• On do-or-die pharmacy scenes:
  “Are you queer? Give me my meds!” (28:09 - Christina, channeling angry customers)

• On code-switching:
  “Just tell him, type…” (46:58 - Christina, teaching Tom how to sound “cool”)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Segment | Timestamp | |--------------------------------------|--------------| | Christina's makeup/fall launch | 01:31 – 04:14 | | Alpha male posturing/threats riff | 04:21 – 10:18 | | Pro female fighters & gender roles | 07:04 – 08:49 | | “Fart King” debate | 13:43 – 15:20 | | Tom’s celebrity BTB story | 15:24 – 19:52 | | Pharmacy etiquette & public rudeness | 21:26 – 25:58 | | Country-by-country BO ranking | 29:14 – 45:48 | | Gay sex honesty/“douche” debate | 50:41 – 53:04 | | Napkin pants controversy | 48:16 – 50:28 | | Code-switching and gay voice | 53:34 – 54:41 | | Porn acting scene review | 57:09 – 62:12 | | Ass-licking musical debate (Ending) | 63:47 – End |

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Tone & Language

The King Of Stink is a raunchy, riff-heavy hangout; it’s candid, raunchy, irreverent, and shot through with marital affection and deep meme-knowledge. Tom and Christina’s banter moves quickly, always veering into personal oversharing and anthropological speculation while playfully poking at race, sex, and bodily taboos.

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For New Listeners

This episode highlights everything YMH fans expect: gleeful gross-out humor, dark absurdity, internet oddballs, uncensored marital confession, and aggressive social commentary—in short, you’ll laugh and choke in equal measure. Expect explicit content, crude language, and zero political correctness.

Transcript

[Tom Segura]

Sunday, October 19th at the hall at Live Casino in Hanover, Maryland. I will be throwing it down. It's one of my favorite spots to go to. Get tickets [e-mail] tour and I'll see you there.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Well, welcome. Welcome to your mom's house.

I don't like it. I don't like it.

Wow. It's been a long time.

I hate it.

Let's go to me, Mark.

And five, four, three, two.

[Tom Segura]

Where's your expression?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I've got. Is your mother's a. Yeah, it's rad.

[Tom Segura]

I was going for the good morning.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

No.

[Tom Segura]

There you go.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

There. You know.

[Tom Segura]

All right.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

They're just telling me how poor it is in the Philippines.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, I know, but we used to. We had all these jays talking and now we got, you know, this lady. It's like, say something. Say something cool and different.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I know.

[Tom Segura]

What's that mean? Your shirt's pressed. All right.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

The lumpia is hot.

[Tom Segura]

I have some kare kare for you to eat today.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

So ridiculous. What?

[Tom Segura]

Welcome to the show.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What's. Everybody.

[Tom Segura]

Everybody.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Can I. Yeah. I love you. I'm gonna miss you. I don't want you to go.

[Tom Segura]

No. I'll be back in a couple days.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I know. Yeah, but you realize today's last day of. No. This is October 1st. This is the best day of the best month.

[Tom Segura]

Oh, that's right.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Of the year.

[Tom Segura]

This is your all time favorite.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

This is the best time.

[Tom Segura]

You might notice I met you, you were like, Halloween is here.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, it's witchy as.

[Tom Segura]

It's witchy. Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

May I make my announcement then, please? I'm so pumped. I've been working for months to develop this. It's finally happening. I'm wearing it right now. This is a liquid lipstick. Liquid lipstick. It is called Nocturne. It's got fall vibes and it stays on forever. This formula.

[Tom Segura]

Oh, this is your new formula.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

My new formula. Liquid.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You can wear it forever and ever and ever. I. I'm absolutely obsessed. And then I made a gloss with just a little bit of shimmer. Just a little bit, not a lot. And it's called Whimsy Kiss Gloss. And the color for fall vibes.

[Tom Segura]

Wow.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Is called Just Like Honey. And it's like a nice honey wheat color. And then. Are you ready for this?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Velvet Crush Blush. It's a blush tomorrow. You're not even excited. Look at me. It's a blush. You open it up and it you. It feels like velvet. And your skin activates. It warms up. And you put it on. And it's so soft and creamy and it stays on.

[Tom Segura]

That's exciting.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Actually, two new colors forever Winona and Romeo's mistress.

[Tom Segura]

If you're a dude trying to get some strange, trying to get your tip licked. Yeah. You know, buy ladies little gifts like that.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

They love it.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Christinap.com check out my new stuff. It's. It is. I'll tell you what I. Why I do this, Tom, Tim, is that the quality of American makeup is not always there.

[Tom Segura]

It's not always there.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I have it made in Italy in an atelier. And I hand. I wear these products for months and months. I hand select them. They're special. Everyone is special to me because I wear them. Try it out.

[Tom Segura]

Christinap.com Ladies, you know what to do, guys, I'm telling you, if you're trying to get some. Some ink on your pen, would you get your lady a nice little gift? Get her some blush or lipstick or do you have eyeliner too?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

No.

[Tom Segura]

No. Is that coming?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Maybe. We'll see.

[Tom Segura]

Eyeshadow.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I just do what I like. I do it what I enjoy.

[Tom Segura]

I do what I do what I use.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I don't like that.

[Tom Segura]

I don't like it, but that's what I like, babe. I like that. All right, you know what to do. Get yourself some new lipstick. And this is.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

This is the fall drop. There's going to be a winner when it's going to blow fucking minds too. But get it now. Pre order it. Sorry, I should ment mention that if you pre order it now, it'll be sent to you in two weeks.

[Tom Segura]

Let me give you the opener of the show.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

The thing about fighting me is that you're not gonna beat my ass. You're not gonna beat my ass. You're not gonna be. I'm gonna be your pussy. You're gonna beat this. I'm gonna be ass up.

[Tom Segura]

I got something to say about that.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

He's.

[Tom Segura]

This house. Welcome to your mom's house. You're not gonna beat my ass. I wanted to say something. When you're a dude and you navigate life, you always have to kind of every room that you're in, your brain on some level sizes people up. You recognize who's a threat and who isn't. And I just want to put it out there to this guy. I will fuck you up. I'll beat the shit out of you. I'm 100% certain of it. So I just want this kid to know that if you even think about coming anywhere close to me and challenge me, it's fucking on. I will beat the absolute fucking shit out of you. There you go.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, I believe you, too. Hey, what's up with this Mark Zuckerberg, guys? Why does he. The trance? What's going on, dude?

[Tom Segura]

No, I don't know.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

He's. I'm gonna. And he goes, I'm gonna.

[Tom Segura]

You're not gonna. I'll beat your ass.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Also, you could do another take of this video, bro. Why did you upload this one?

[Tom Segura]

Matter of fact, I'll put money on the line for any mail that works.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Here, though, to take him on.

[Tom Segura]

I think every single one could take him.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Really?

[Tom Segura]

Every single one?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

We've got some pretty.

[Tom Segura]

I know.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Weak ones.

[Tom Segura]

Well, I know we got some softies here, but they're not softer than him.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What do you think he weighs, this guy?

[Tom Segura]

It's hard to say because he's not standing. Can't see the full body.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I think some of the women could take him.

[Tom Segura]

I believe that, too. I hadn't the kicked out of me by a woman.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I know you have.

[Tom Segura]

Well, I did that thing for. For Rogue with the ufc.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, right. Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And Little Monster. I mean, she's a professional fighter, but she.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Show her. Let's look at her.

[Tom Segura]

Look at Little Monster.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Little Monster?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah. Dang. Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Is she black?

[Tom Segura]

No. Oh, she's Greek.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Segura]

She's like 5 1.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Bring her up and. But she's a. She's a little meat pocket. Damn muscle vessel. Yeah, dude, that chick is yo. Just a muscle.

[Tom Segura]

You don't understand. When you're. When you're with a pro, the level. The level of skill is insane.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What does it feel like to touch a woman that's, like, strong like that?

[Tom Segura]

Well, you're not really touching her as so much as just trying to hold on for dear life. So. Yeah. What did she do?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

She boxed you or.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, she playboxed me. And then she just went to her ground like jiu jitsu. Oh. She's just wrap me up like a cobra. And she did it at like 30, 40% of her capacity.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Be honest with me. I know I'm your wife and we're maritally loving and wedded and stuff. You didn't get just a little hard?

[Tom Segura]

No, I was actually. I was trying to. I was like, hey, this arm's pretty.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Up, you know, trying to save your limbs.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

But you don't think if I got into this and I could do this to you in the bedroom, it would excite you?

[Tom Segura]

Hear me out, okay?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I'm hearing you in the world. You're very dominant male. You're. You're doing your thing. You're non toxic alpha. What if in the bedroom I become the alpha?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And I dominate you?

[Tom Segura]

I don't know about that. Yeah, I don't think so.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

She looks amazing.

[Tom Segura]

She's amazing. She's super talented too. She's super talented. If any of the women here started training, I bet they could fuck him up real good.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, for sure.

[Tom Segura]

I want to see this fight. I want to fund these fights. I want to do fight night.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I mean there's some security that works and whoever else. Oh, he's got the weird Zuckerberg. He's got a. There's like female security that could whoop this guy's ass at mothership. You know what I'm saying?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, of course. Yeah, yeah. There's that one that we know that we see all the time would just annihilate this guy. Yeah, it's pretty cool.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Dildo.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You can't. And also from what I understand of like male stuff is that you can't just issue idle threats like this cuz some, some psycho is going to take you up on it. Like you.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I mean this isn't that stupid to like put. Put forth threats.

[Tom Segura]

Does he put through. But is. Is this his thing to talk about threats all the time? Is he like always talking about beating people up? This guy, do you know or do we know?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

We don't know. We haven't found his profile yet.

[Tom Segura]

Oh, okay. He's known as Frankie Fardy. That's his real. That's what he's known as? No, that's what it says here. Frankie Fardeys.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, that's what they're calling him in.

[Tom Segura]

The comments because his eyes look like they fart. I don't understand.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

No, it looks like he has pink eye in them. Someone farted in his eyes.

[Tom Segura]

Like someone farted in his eyes.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

The caption says that face when your bully holds you down and farts in your eyes.

[Tom Segura]

So is this video that someone posted or. It's not from his page now.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

It's something someone posted.

[Tom Segura]

Oh, okay. Yeah. Well, let it be known, dude, if you want to go, this whole studio is ready.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Damn.

Just. Just to make it clear, Tom saying that. We're not saying that necessarily.

Any. You're not gonna. You don't feel you could take him on fart?

I just feel a little bad for the guy, you know, I just don't want to add to the, you know.

[Tom Segura]

You feel bad for a guy that's threatening violence I think he's just, you.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Know, he's been hit too many times and he's just trying to defend himself. You know, what if we all just farted in his eyes? I would do it probably. Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

I mean, do it. You're the Fart King.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, if he was in school.

Well, I don't know if he is not the Fart King. Don't you give any the title of Fart King? He denied his title.

[Tom Segura]

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[Christina Pazsitzky]

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[Tom Segura]

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[Christina Pazsitzky]

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[Tom Segura]

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[Christina Pazsitzky]

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[Tom Segura]

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[Christina Pazsitzky]

I mean, I will beat you if that's what you know.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

If we really want to go there.

[Tom Segura]

Oh. Oh, he's really.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

See me.

Yeah.

Well, yeah. I mean, but I don't think you're the fart king of ymh, obviously. That's my husband Tom. Oh, there's nobody that farts bigger than Tom. You guys have compilate. There's entire compilations that are on our social media.

[Tom Segura]

Those aren't of massive farts, though, beefing.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

During your green screen.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, but those aren't like, what a fart.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, but I've lived with you for 20 years. You have what a fart fart. And he's done one fart in his lifetime at ymh and he.

I could bring Tanner in here right now and he'll tell you a very funny.

Why don't you show us these farts? Why are you hiding your farts from us then? Why is it just Tanner that gets to have this?

I don't know what you're talking about. I just. It's. Look, that I'm not.

[Tom Segura]

The.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

The being proud of a fart is crazy, man. That's just not what we.

[Tom Segura]

I will say. I. I am always a little. I'll be honest. I'm a little disappointed and I'm a little hurt.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

God.

[Tom Segura]

That every time I fart around you, I get a head shake and you're like. It's wild. You're disrespectful. There's a time you never celebrate that.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

He never does.

There was a time we were about to go do ads in this studio, and we were in the other studio, and on your way in front of me, you farted, and I just didn't do the ads. I just stayed in that studio. I ain't gonna breathe that air that you're trying to force me to breathe. I ain't gonna do it. I'm just sitting there now. I'm going to just be on the phone for a little bit.

[Tom Segura]

Brother, what kind of relationship do we have that you can't be like, yo, that was dope, man. Like, let's go do some ads.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Now you're my boss. That's our relationship. The.

[Tom Segura]

You mean so big ups, boss. That was a type.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

No, that. No, no, that ain't. No.

He called you the N word.

[Tom Segura]

I call everybody.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I know. It does feel special when you call us the N word, bro.

[Tom Segura]

I was hanging out in. A couple of weeks ago, I was in Vegas with some major btbs.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Hell, yeah.

Btb.

Type. Type. Did you give them the type?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, type.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

That's what I taught you.

Six.

[Tom Segura]

Seven. It was seven.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, my God.

[Tom Segura]

These were like, major. This was like the creme de la creme of btbs. Okay. Big time blacks. Yeah. I mean, I'm at. I'm at this massive fight.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I can't look at you talking about.

[Tom Segura]

And there's Chappelle Marshawn Lynch.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Big time.

[Tom Segura]

Chance the Rapper, Mike Tyson.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Wow.

[Tom Segura]

Michael Irvin, Evander Holyfield. This is Lennox Lewis.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Biggest time.

[Tom Segura]

It was like the BTBS of btbs.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

It's a Mount Rushmore of btbs.

[Tom Segura]

And I just kind of damn wiggled my way in there and I was like, what's up? And it was the best when the btbs are in an environment like that and having fun. Yeah, it's the greatest, man. It was so good.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

He's. Oh, my God.

[Tom Segura]

You're right behind Tyson, right behind Iron Mike. I see Tony there. Kirk Fox.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What did it feel like to be so close to Mike and you guys have, like, a relationship?

[Tom Segura]

Well, it was fun. I. You know, when I. They're like, you're right. You're right. With Mike Tyson, I was like, oh, sweet. And I saw him, and at first when I came to my seat, he was already in his seat. So I was like, oh, I'll just, you know, I don't wanna. He's with his wife. Like, his arms around his wife, you know, like, hey. So I just kind of waited a bit, and then I found a moment. I said, what's up to him now?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

How did you do it, though?

[Tom Segura]

I'll tell you exactly how I did it. So he seated there. I was like, there's. There's kind of like a break in the. The fight hadn't Started yet. So we were all just kind of, like, waiting around, and I just came around. I said, mike. I just went right into it. I was like, hey, we did. We did Rogan's podcast together one time. And then I was like, oh, yeah. And I go. And we flew together once, and you came to my show, and I had this. And he goes, segura. And I go, yeah. He goes, it's good to see you, man. And gave me, you know, just like, a little exchange like that. And I was like, well, I'm right here. If. If you need anything, you know, I'll. Somebody up.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Can I tell you. Can I tell you why that's so amazing is that he remembered your last name.

[Tom Segura]

Remember my last name accurately? Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Not like Madison Square Garden.

[Tom Segura]

Mono. Trust. Yeah. Oh, you. Tom. Cigar. Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And that's a btb.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. But he gave me a. He gave me a cigura. And. And he was like, yeah, it's good to see you. We chatted a couple more times during the fight. You know, I was asking, but that was fun.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You know what?

[Tom Segura]

I love meeting Maron.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, my. Even I know who that is from. From footballs. When you're watching the football game. And I like, that's a great name.

[Tom Segura]

Okay. Any. When I point to you.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, boy.

[Tom Segura]

Say the nw. Okay. No, I'm just telling you this.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I think I can. I think I can pick it up.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, this is exactly how this. So. So I. I see Marshon, and we had texted the night before. I was introduced to him via text. So I was like, hey, I'll be at the fight. He was like, me too. Blah, blah, blah. So then I see him, right? And I. There's a bunch of people. And he also. Everybody knows him, so everybody's kind of like. I'm like, all right, I'm just gonna, like, say what's up? Because I just. We just texted. So I tap him on the shoulder, turns around, I go, hey, it's Tom. We text. He was like, oh, what's up, man? So we chat a little bit, and as we're chatting about something, that the reason we were introduced was for, like, an idea. So we're chatting about this idea. He's holding a. He's really into photography now. So he's been. He went to NFL. He was photographing the fight. But we're in the lounge. I was like, oh, what you got there? Tell me about the camera. And then he looks up as we're talking, sees somebody, and he goes, hey. And then and then he goes. The guy turns and he goes. And he turns back to me, he's like, yeah. So I go, oh, that's an interesting way you work.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Just startled.

[Tom Segura]

Like most photographers are like excited. Excuse me. Or hey, stay right there. He just goes, sup, nigga? Then it was in crowds, like, that's the first, like photographer, like notable photographer who grabs people's attention that way.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

That's such a great idea for a book.

[Tom Segura]

Oh, yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And you could just call it.

You could just call it something.

Yeah. And you open it up and it's everybody that just photos said that to. And then it's just your face of being like, yeah. I wonder, did any. Did he say that to any white people or just other btbs?

[Tom Segura]

Well, that would. I would have to be around him all the time to know that, right?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You just saw it like once he did it like one time.

[Tom Segura]

It was pretty great though. Wow. It was pretty great.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What a room. What a special time. What a special thing to be a part of.

[Tom Segura]

The fun thing is to see him in that environment saying that and then like a 62 year old white guy going like, ah, all right. He's like, that's interesting.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

That's always my favorite. It's like, well, you weren't uncomfortable with this word a few years ago.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What happened?

[Tom Segura]

You weren't uncomfortable when you were in high school and you were yelling it across the field. So now you're like, oh, my goodness. And then the other white guy follow up to that. The older one is always, how come they can say it?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

That's always the problem whites have with it.

[Tom Segura]

It's old, old, older, whites. And can I tell you something? It's always a charade. In other words.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, I think.

[Tom Segura]

No, no. You know the answer.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

You just like to go, why?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

The best response to that though is like, no, you can, you can.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, go ahead, say it right now in the middle of the room.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I just want to hear how you would say it.

[Tom Segura]

Go ahead.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And then they go, wait, are you being.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Well, I don't want to. You know, I don't want to.

[Tom Segura]

I don't actually use that word.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I'm not disrespecting you when I say it. What do you mean?

[Tom Segura]

Just, I just thought that I could. Isn't this freedom of speech? Yeah, yeah, go ahead. Yeah, you're free. Would you feel free?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

So listen, as long as we're on BTB topics and stuff now, this didn't happen with a B, but I was at the pharmacy and I was Waiting for my Prozac.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And there was a. A gentleman just like a middle aged white guy next to me. Now the pharmacy we go to is very in. It's like small. The seating area.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And I'm waiting for them to call my name and blah, blah, blah. And it's just me, another old guy on the bench. We're just waiting.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And he's rolling business calls and you know, like. And it's cool.

[Tom Segura]

Move.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

It's so cool. And it's also like, oh, you have to do this call right now in front of all of us. And it was like, well, you know, the media requests have been pretty. Yeah, we can do that. And I was like. Like he clearly wants us to know how important he is. Like he couldn't wait for 15 minutes and make the call outside. Now the one saving. And it was really annoying because.

[Tom Segura]

Was it Larry Ellison? Because it sounds like it was a really important person.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

But he, he was just. And then he'd roll into another one. And I was like, are you kidding me? And the guy next to me, we were like, this is horrible. But the one thing I will give him is that at least he didn't do it on speakerphone.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah. That's another level. Usually something that. Usually when guys do it all the time.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Bees do it. Why do bees do it?

Stay out my bid. Like it's my phone. What the you mean? Right. I'm not using your phone. That'd be different.

[Tom Segura]

Right? That's.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

That's disrespectful.

But the speakerphone convert, like if. To have the whole thing on speakerphone.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Well, real BTB is bringing out the JBL and then putting it on that. That's real btv. I don't do that. That's. That's a. That's another tier. I can't. I'm not there.

[Tom Segura]

There's different tears.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I've never seen that.

The jbl. You've seen it?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

The speaker. You mean a speaker?

A little pill speaker.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah. All right. Young. Yeah. And you're just like, all right. Yeah. For all of us. Yeah. But that, that is a. I've seen women, by the way, also do the public.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, it's the word. And it's the dumbest conversation.

[Tom Segura]

It's always like a. It's a performative thing.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

To get people. It depends on the type of conversation. Usually like what people are doing in that situation is they're trying to show people around them. Either A. I'm not someone to be played with.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

The men. The Men.

[Tom Segura]

It depends.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Sometimes it's like, you know, because if they do, like, will you tell that.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

That when I see them.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

I'm gonna them up. And you're like, okay, this is for everybody to kind of get. Gather that you're tough.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Sometimes it's. I want everybody around to, you know, know that I'm important. I have important things going on. It's real crazy. Sometimes people who do this will throw in numbers.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yes.

[Tom Segura]

You know, so this could be like, yeah, you know, 2.7 million. Whatever. It. I got it. And you're like, okay, all right.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

This is a big shot now. He's a big shot.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And he was a traveler. He had to let us know that he'll be in Europe for the next two months.

[Tom Segura]

That's another. I'm important. I'm letting everybody know that everybody.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Important guy here in the pharmacy knew that he and his wife were going to Europe for two months.

[Tom Segura]

Well, I can do that in Prague. I can't do that here. Oh, wow.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

It was so gross. And then. But you're right. The women's conversations are like, Well, I told her I was like, skyler, if I go to that Pilates, I am not gonna see you there. You better not go to Na Na Na Na Na. It's always about beef with some other woman.

[Tom Segura]

Sometimes people will do that thing.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

It's horrible.

[Tom Segura]

Where they'll have the argument with their significant other in front of people. It's another way of just, like, performing for the. For the room. Let them know that, like, I'm taken, I'm wanted, and I will. I will. I will correct you. Confront. You know, like, they want people to know, like, oh, wow, look how tough this person is. Yeah. Sometimes you just, you know, you're in those pharmacy lines and things just kind of go sideways. Right. Get my money back for the pills. That was the wrong pill. This guy has told me to.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

My mother.

[Tom Segura]

Your mother. Get my money back for the pills now. You're not going to kill me.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Your mother? Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Please be America. Your mother, your father. You get my money back with my pills. Yeah. That's my heart. Doctor. I'm not gonna die for you. A redneck scumbag like you. Now somebody better give me 35 back is what they better do. Yeah, cops are kind of free speech. Queer. Are you queer? Nobody like that. Get the hell out of here. You clear.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Damn.

[Tom Segura]

I think he found the button.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Everything was fine until he was like, are you queer? He's like, get the out of here.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

That sounded like, fart eyes.

[Tom Segura]

You're not gonna be my. You're. I'm not gonna. You're gonna be my. I'll be your ass. Okay.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

But in defense of this gentleman, cvs, not great, generally. Yeah, I, I, it's the worst. It's the lowest.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Dude, I felt like this.

[Tom Segura]

Your mother, free speech America.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Your mother, free speech America.

[Tom Segura]

Three separate thoughts combined to make one sentence.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Your mother, free speech America.

Yeah, that's lowkey. A bar.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, it's pretty tight. Your mother, your father, free speech. Queer. Now, to say this.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Your mother.

[Tom Segura]

What? Listening to somebody roll calls publicly is a nightmare. Listening to somebody lose their. And scream at a retail person just doing their job like a prayer service. It's absolutely one of the most beautiful things you can witness. Yeah, this is like a candlelight vigil in my eyes.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I know it feels good. But then, yeah, I feel bad for the workers. I felt like this. When you ever have it where they're like, So I had to get my Prozac, you know? And then they're like. And they're like, I waited forever. And then I get up there, and she's like, yeah, we can't do that until October 15th. I'm like, do what? Give me these pills. Like, if I don't take these, I'm gonna have a psychotic breakdown, bro. Like, I gotta take these. And I was like, I don't care. Just wait. Like, it's an insurance thing.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And I'm like, you. I was like, just. It's. It was like a whole $5, too.

[Tom Segura]

Were you like, are you queer?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah. That's how I wanted to feel. Like, even the other girl behind the register was like, bro, it's like $5. Just give her the meds.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Like, I wasn't gonna be like, no, I can't pay $5.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

To have my mind right.

[Tom Segura]

Oh, right. Anyway, so you had to pay the five bucks, Whoopi.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, give it to me, dummy. Anyway, I, I get this guy. I feel him.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, I get it too.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Your mother, your father.

[Tom Segura]

Are you queer? Give me my meds. I give you my money back. Give me my $35.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Give me my 35.

[Tom Segura]

He wants the. He wants to what? Give the pills back and get the money. I don't really understand.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I don't understand either. I guess he wants his money back because they didn't give him the right amount of pills or some.

[Tom Segura]

I don't know, but that's very rare. I would love to see how this was resolved.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

They're so stingy. With their pills in America so hard to get, like, antibiotics, you know, Stupid. That is.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Like, oh, I need penicillin. Well, I'm not going to OD on penicillin. They should just sell that shit at the bodega. You know how, like, you're in Mexico and you're in the.

[Tom Segura]

Why can't penicillin or whatever have what Latin America has, which is just a pharmacy?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Normal.

[Tom Segura]

You can get what you need.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I know.

[Tom Segura]

You just go, I need antibiotics. And they're like, yeah, here they are.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah. You're not going to abuse penicillin.

[Tom Segura]

I need dick pills. Why can't I just buy them here? What the fuck?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I know they regulate that.

[Tom Segura]

They regulate.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I'm like, just fucking guys. I'm not gonna go trying to get high.

[Tom Segura]

Why can't I buy a pill here? Anyway, let's talk about speaking of people from different parts of the world. Who smells the worst? Because I'll say this.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

A lot of people. And I'm sure that, like, you'll. You'll see this a lot. At least here in the States, they always attribute the bo. Of bos to the people of India and Pakistan. Right. They'll just go that you guys don't. But it's not fair to dismiss Eastern Europe.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I agree. 100.

[Tom Segura]

Some of the smelliest that we've ever come across are white.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yes.

[Tom Segura]

Eastern Europeans. Now, there's reason, right? There's always, like, factors for how this happens culturally, why a culture of people would have Absolutely. Eastern Europe. You go there, my God, in the summertime, and it's a nightmare. And one of the reasons, I think, that we're finding it to be so prevalent amongst Eastern European whites is that one of their fashion choices that you find, especially amongst men, is the sleeveless tea.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yes.

[Tom Segura]

They love to go out in, like, one of these. Right. And it's summertime and your bodies are cooking and the armpits are right there. It's like a. It's like a invitation to meet their armpits.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah. It's a smell buffet.

[Tom Segura]

It really is. And. And I also think that it must be also not just the attire and the climate, but that maybe deodorant is just not as prevalent and. And popular like here in the States. For most people who have, let's just say, who are employed, like, if you have a job for most people, they're like, oh, my hygiene is at least somewhat important. I'll wear deodorant. But when you're there, you feel like, oh, I don't feel like, and like, these are employed people. I don't feel like you care what you smell like. And this is your people.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What's the my tribe? So I, I listen.

[Tom Segura]

That's the best smelling people, by the way.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What?

[Tom Segura]

In my experience in America, it's black women.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Did they say smell lovely?

[Tom Segura]

And Latins of both.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I was just going to say high class Latins smell always amazing.

[Tom Segura]

Always.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah. So here's the deal, man, is I was thinking about this topic yesterday because we smelled B.O. yesterday.

[Tom Segura]

Bad.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Bad.

[Tom Segura]

Real bad. And crackers too. Yeah, yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

White guy.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And I was like, wow, it's been a while since I felt that it's so personal to smell somebody's body, especially.

[Tom Segura]

If you're in close proximity. Like, if you're talking, if you're, you know, it's one thing, somebody walks by, you go, Jesus Christ.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

When you're like, having to talk to someone, you're like, the is going on.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

It's an assault on the senses.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

It doesn't, it's kind, it's like, whoa, that. I don't know you like that, bro. Like, how can you inflict that? But summer of 1994, I was in Hungary for like months. And I would ride the villamos, the Hungarian transport. And man, that was a smell I'll never forget. People packed in sweating. Right. I've also been to the Middle east and the Middle Easterners. I think you have a theory that's right here. Because they wear the, the, the clothing, it masks the smells if they have them. And also a lot of people, like you said, the Indians, they think they're the stinkiest. Not my stepdad, I lived with one.

[Tom Segura]

And he wasn't, not once that I smell him. I just, I feel, because, like, I'll say this, you know, I've grown up obviously, like in a, a Latin influenced household. I've spent a lot of time with Latin American people. The women, dude, they, they never smell bad. They never smell bad. The dudes. A cultural thing amongst a lot of Latin dudes is not just like hygiene presentation. They're all into like cologne. Like, oh, that smells.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Nice smells.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah. Easter.

[Tom Segura]

I would also say if you want to play a game, when you're out in public, next time let's say you're in a hotel lobby, you're in a bar, a restaurant, just any of the mall. If you see a black woman who is between the ages of 20 and 60, you can bet your. I bet you if you go, this woman's gonna smell amazing. Nine out of ten times.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Segura]

You'll be, you'll walk by her and be like, she smells amazing.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And I think it's partially, you know, it's a culture thing. Skin care, hair care. They almost always smell amazing.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Lovely. They smell. And they, the lotions on their skin always smell.

[Tom Segura]

It's almost, it's. I would say it's like more than 9 out of 10. It's almost like 10 out of 10. Yeah, it's really crazy.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And black gentlemen smell very nice.

[Tom Segura]

A lot of black guys also. Yeah, very much. With like skin care presentation.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You know who's the best smelling black man in show business? I think I've even told you this before.

[Tom Segura]

Marlon Waynes.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Marlon Wayans. That guy would show up. I worked on one TV show with him a million years ago, and he just smelled like a dream. And he smelled like he used, I think, Aveda hair stuff. And then whatever combination, I was like, this guy smells amazing.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And Brett Ernst smelled very good all the time. Comedian Brett Ernst. Those are two good smelling.

[Tom Segura]

Shout out to Brett.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Comedy. Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Good hygiene.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Good hygiene. And that's really what it is.

[Tom Segura]

It's all about hygiene. Yeah. Oh, 20 countries with the worst.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

20 countries with the worst body odor, according to Reddit.

[Tom Segura]

Okay, this is interesting. So number 20, they have Vietnam. And it says, you know, Southeast Asia's humid environment. That. That makes sense. This is like.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And it's also like it's a developing country. Right. Like, it's not like completely, whatever. Undeveloped. But yeah, there's like, there's a lot of rural parts and.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

But like the other Asians. Not smelly at all. Like the Japanese. Not smelly. Right. Totally, totally different type of Asian.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

However, if you go to Korea, South Korea, obviously, the whole fucking place smelled like garlic.

[Tom Segura]

It makes sense.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

It's like part of the. Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Everything smell like garlic to me.

[Tom Segura]

19 oh, Philippines.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

There you go. Congratulations.

[Tom Segura]

There's tenor. There's any. Philippines. Body odor. Body odor, Body odor, especially for those who suffer from it. The condition may have a negative impact on their social life. Take note from the additional variables affect body odors, incidents in addition to inadequate cleanliness.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Diet has an impact, which is kind of like the garlic thing.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Pork, rice, bread are the key ingredients of that cuisine. Onions and garlic.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Can I tell you. Yes. When we smelled that guy's bo I think why it's so offensive to me is because then I'm aware of his habits, like his eating.

[Tom Segura]

Right.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Like his teeth brushing or.

[Tom Segura]

Well, here's kind of crazy. 18 is Nepal. So far, Asia is dominating the BO.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Asia wins.

[Tom Segura]

Well, in 17 we go to Iran. Now, what's interesting, I wonder. I wonder if this had been a. And if they would be on this list pre. Like revolution. Sure. You know what I mean? Like when, when, when Tehran was the. Like the Paris of the Middle East.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yes.

[Tom Segura]

This may have been so true. A different thing.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And also, might I add, when I was doing USO tours many years ago, I spent some time with Iraqi soldiers. Yeah, man, that was a funk.

[Tom Segura]

That was.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

That didn't smell good.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, that did not smell good. Saudi Arabia.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Again, it's a really hot environment. Yeah, right. This says here. This is interesting because again, we were talking about culture. Hall discovered Arabs do not make an effort to completely cover their odors. And in contrast to Americans who engage in daily rituals of deodorizing and perfume application, Arabs practice purification rights. They aim to symbolize, eradicate the. The differentness of the outsider whom their culture refers to as he who stinks. So it's almost like separating us from you that you do that. We don't do that. Turkey.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, no. I love.

[Tom Segura]

Is a country with the worst body. But it's number 15.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, no.

[Tom Segura]

That was according to Turkish Hurriet. The comment left by American basketball ball player Danny Granger on his Twitter, which angered Turks, of course. In the world championship, he traveled to Turkey. And according to his blog, Turks don't use deodorant and smell like dead donkeys.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

A dead donkey.

[Tom Segura]

All right, fair enough.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

The Turks are very. Iraq, not there. I was in the. In the Persian Gulf.

[Tom Segura]

Back to what you were saying about what you. They use a lot of spices.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

They use the stinky ones. Yeah. Nutmeg, cloves, paprika.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Paprika. Which might explain my Hungarian summer. And we eat a lot of garlic too.

[Tom Segura]

Will be on this list.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

There's still 13 more spots.

[Tom Segura]

There sure is. Indonesia. I get that.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, for sure.

[Tom Segura]

That's a gimme a lot. Almost every place that we have seen on this list is a warm climate.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Humid, tropical. However, hold on though.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Let's do a little devil devil's advocate here.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You know where else is hot?

[Tom Segura]

Where?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

The Bahamas, the Caribbean, Jamaica. You don't see these.

[Tom Segura]

Well, we don't know. We don't know what's coming up. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Go back.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

This is a different.

[Tom Segura]

This is interesting because in this, this says that the owner of this newest motorcycle sharing firm, Aris, why you believes he has Discovered a novel strategy for increasing sales. Endang Ahmad, a 37 year old professional armpit sniffer.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, wow.

[Tom Segura]

Adds that holding a clip where he uses it to grade applicants while they stand with their arms out in front of them. We have come across many types of odor. We don't give a pass to those whose perspiration and. Okay, I'm not really sure what that was.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, it was. Perspir and underarm odor are combined. I don't understand how you can separate the two.

[Tom Segura]

Let's scroll.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

This is nonsense.

[Tom Segura]

Thailand, Cambodia again. All right, finally, finally. Okay, so there's 10, two more Asian countries and then finally the USA. Okay, scroll down. According to the survey, Americans are far less likely than their older counterparts to have used deodorant.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

This is true.

[Tom Segura]

Or younger Americans. Excuse me, that makes sense to me.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

The hippie shit.

[Tom Segura]

For nearly 4 in 10Americans between the ages of 18 and 24 claimed they hadn't used antiposter or deodorant in previous month. Only 69% of Americans between the ages of 25 and 34 reported using their product. So maybe this younger generation is stinkier than the older. I would, I feel like my parent generation, almost everybody that I would meet always smelled clean.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

But these younger kids, they're like, it's not natural. It's going to give you cancer. Like, I don't think it's not the deodorant.

[Tom Segura]

My question to the younger generation of Americans is, are you queer? Because you should be cleaning up. Okay, scroll.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, they're hippies, man.

Yeah, I was gonna say Hollywood hipsters. Yeah, that's the worst smell.

I think the patchouli wearing crowd. And now we're getting, now we're getting top 10.

[Tom Segura]

So nine is Australia, which again, very hot climate. True. And it just says that Australia's performance in the area of hygiene and grooming falls below the world.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I doubt that.

[Tom Segura]

I can see just the fact that it's a very outdoorsy, active.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

True.

[Tom Segura]

Type.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Hot.

[Tom Segura]

As hot as. And maybe like people who are, you know, you're in the outback or something. The last thing on that guy's mind is like, do I smell good?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

So, okay, but what about the coastal towns? You know, the Brisbane and I mean.

[Tom Segura]

It'S like anywhere Sydney. I think the more cosmopolitan the, the city you're in and the type of community you're in, you're going to see hygiene become a thing. But this is a country that just does have a lot of outdoorsy accents.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh yeah, yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And maybe that's for Some of that. But what's more interesting to me is now we're getting somewhere because number eight is the Czech Republic.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Here we go.

[Tom Segura]

So we're getting into Eastern Europe. I wonder if they will dominate the rest of this list. Of course. So after their beer. The second most recognizable characteristic of the Czech is their body odor. Deodorant uses is generally frowned upon in Europe, but among the Czechs, there is more simply. Just is more. There is more than simply hesitation. The frequency and potency of the smell suggests it is a direct protest against proper underarm hygiene. That is insane.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Tracks, dude.

[Tom Segura]

So it. It's like. It's both intolerable and. And accepted that I guess that one would use that. So the Czechs are stinky, laid back, multilingual people who think that cigarettes are man's greatest friend. All right. They're really letting them hear it. Czech Republic.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Well, you're number the French. The French are stinky too. Have pit hair.

[Tom Segura]

Absolutely.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Russia, dude.

[Tom Segura]

Russia.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

There you go.

[Tom Segura]

Of course.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

So see, the whites beat everybody.

[Tom Segura]

I know. And the Russians are also like you. That's kind of like their attitude. So I could totally see vodka drinking out.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

They drink a lot of alcohol too. Sausages. And it comes out of your pores.

[Tom Segura]

All right, now we're getting somewhere. So we're still. That's basically Eastern Europe. Okay, scroll down. Number Bangladesh.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

That's like.

[Tom Segura]

Seriously, Curry is a common odor among Nepalese, Indian, Pakistani, Bangladeshi people. Again, this is like directly related to cuisine, it seems.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, that's.

[Tom Segura]

That's the suggestion. Pakistan. We knew you'd be in here. We've run into you. We don't even need an explanation. Scroll for German.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Germans. True story.

[Tom Segura]

You know, lie says the world's worst lovers are guys from Germany. German men just edged out English guys to claim the unwelcome title of the worst lovers in the world. Wow.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You know, can I tell you why I believe the Germans are. There's not as much focus on hygiene. At least my grandmother, who was born in Germany and grew up somewhat German. There's less emphasis on, like, you have to wash your hair a lot or you have to shower a lot. They are less into it. And I think they just don't use deodorant.

[Tom Segura]

Just like Eastern sense, bro.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

There's France number three. Yeah, dog. Yeah. They have stinky pits, dude.

[Tom Segura]

Listen to this stat, though. According to this survey, 43% of French men and women, according to the research, don't take a daily shower. That's nearly half. One fourth admit to taking a shower once every 48 hours. 11% said every three days, and 8% said they take one every five, four days. So hygiene's a real struggle in France. The fact that you guys in France have the audacity to tilt your noses up at people for anything is beyond comprehension. You're disgusting. Okay, let's go. Africa. You mean the whole continent?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

That's a. That's a little.

[Tom Segura]

Humans have a gene that produces a protein that feeds the bacteria responsible for body odor. Most African Americans and Africans carry this gene. Nearly 97 of people of European or African descent carry the odor. Well, that's just saying all people. It's just that African.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

That's like all the planet, bro.

[Tom Segura]

Okay, that's.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Only the Asians are missing there.

[Tom Segura]

So we know India's number one. Right? That's what's going to happen.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah. Hey, let me tell you, my stepdad never.

[Tom Segura]

I would. I would love to see what, just like, what this summary is, though. So the thing is. So they're not used a lot. Antiperspirants, deodorants. I get that. Majority of Indians believe the deodorant is a western invention. Okay, so that kind of makes sense. A majority of respondents who do not use deodorant or use them blame the expensive price of the product. That also makes sense. India has a high rate of poverty. Obviously the cuisine is. Is a thing. Right. We gather that that's going to affect the way you smell. Not only the body odor of Indian guys smell, but four to five of them will have it. Don't know what that means. The bodily stench is more potent than that of a sour radish. Okay, so there's a little bit of a editorial spin on this.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Do you think that in these countries where it's more customary to not have good hygiene and to not put deodorant on, do you think the women prefer a man with his musk built?

[Tom Segura]

Yes. So then you get used to it. I think we human beings acclimate to everything kind of period.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Sure.

[Tom Segura]

And I do think if you're born in, raised around or around a place, that that that is the norm. That is the norm. In other words, you just go like, whatever. Now, somebody can have an extreme smell, obviously, but I think your standard BO where someone's like, I didn't shower today. I don't think it's going to affect everybody around them if they're encountering it every day. That's just the way we're doing.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I bet it really affects your mating stuff because, like, I like how you smell.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Well, no, it's on. It's pheromones and such. And if people are releasing them with abandon.

[Tom Segura]

I had this conversation. I'm not going to. I'll tell you off, Mike. But, like, where somebody notable was like, oh, yeah, you definitely should never wear, like, cologne or anything. And I was like, what? Why? They're like, because that doesn't smell good. What smells good is, like, just your natural smells. And I was like, huh, okay. And this was like, a woman, you know, saying this.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah. Because women are attracted to men's smells.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah. Pheromones.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah. And I like. I like the way you smell naturally.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And we're. That it's a huge thing for women and who want. Who you want to reproduce.

[Tom Segura]

You don't want bo.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You don't want bo, but you want that person's like, pheromones. Like, for instance, women. There's a study about how when you're on the birth control pill, it alters your body chemistry, too, and. And your ability to smell and your pheromones as well. So it. With that dynamic. You know what I'm saying? You feel me? I'm talking.

[Tom Segura]

I know what you're talking about. Yeah. I know exactly what you're saying. Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Was it when you said Annie, that type.

Type.

[Tom Segura]

Type. Type.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, that's what. That's what I taught. Taught Tom when. What's his name, Drew, was in here, I was like, just tell him, type. When you see he don't understand, you go, understand. He got mad.

[Tom Segura]

He did. He got mad. He got mad. He's like, don't try to sound black and cool.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And he's like, what the. What is this?

[Tom Segura]

Who taught you this? What is this? Come on, man, just talk to me normal. I had another black guy ever. Another black guy, he goes, six, seven.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Your kids say that, right?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Okay.

[Tom Segura]

This black dude, he was like, yo. He goes, yo, say. Like. He was telling me what to say in this dialogue we were having. He was like, be like, yo, what's up, man? I didn't know you was here. What's up? You know? I go, oh, okay. So I go, yes. What's up, man? I didn't know. He goes, no, no. Say it the way you'd say it. It.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, my God.

[Tom Segura]

He was like, don't say how I say it. Say how you say it. I was like, oh. Like, say it like a white guy. He's like, yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I was like, oh, okay. Nerd alert.

[Tom Segura]

I thought he was telling me, like, say. Say What I'm saying, he was like, yeah, but not like me. Say like you.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I was like, oh, okay, I gotta pee. Like me.

[Tom Segura]

Okay, go ahead. Peed. Felt good. Oh, my God. Do you have an email that we're supposed to read?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, there's quite a few. I mean, listen, I've been wiping my hands on my pants lately. Do you want to read the response? Somebody's real just cheese off about it.

[Tom Segura]

Well, yeah, I was. I mean, like, I'm using my. My jeans pants as napkin. Doing napkin pants.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yes. Which is fine. Especially on denim, which is meant to absorb oils and such and food. And then I wash my pants. Okay, what's the prop?

[Tom Segura]

Just get a napkin, dude.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I don't want to get a napkin. I'm with my kids. I'm running them in the park. I'm never around a napkin.

[Tom Segura]

All right?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I'm always in the car.

[Tom Segura]

It's just. Here's the email.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Nobody cares.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, nobody cares. I heard your plea for the normalization of napkin pants. Let me lay out my argument here. As a mom, I get it. I'm disgusting out of necessity. Also, at this point, you're not doing this out of necessity. It's an active choice. But your pants are to cover your naked bottom and legs. They're not meant as napkins. Naked. Maybe you could carry a napkin or a hanky or something. Jesus Christ. Gene. Here are the risks of napkin pants. The oils of the foods may create stands stains in the fabric that are difficult to remove. All right, if you have an animal, they may lick the jeans because they smell. Enjoy the remnants of your napkin. Even better, if you blow your nose on your short on your shirt and then wipe food hands on your napkin pants, you're kind of a walking petri dish. Thus showing the world how disgusting you truly are. Okay, that one's not a risk, more of a fact. Honestly, I support you living your truth. Plus, none of your friends will ever ask to borrow your clothes when they witness these atrocities. Hate from Minnesota. Whitney.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Well, Whitney, those are all good points, but they're stupid and wrong.

[Tom Segura]

No, Whitney's right. Whitney is right. You're queer and it's disgusting.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

But I wash my pants regularly. It's not a big deal.

[Tom Segura]

What are you talking about?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What's wrong with it with cats licking your pants or animals licking your pants? I think it's lovely. And by the way, it's not covering your naked bottom. You don't wear underwear, you disgusting bitch. Whitney. Filthy ass. That's what underwear is for. It's a barrier between your genitals, your asshole and your pants, dummy.

[Tom Segura]

Whitney is right. You are disgusting. Get a napkin. Get a paper towel. Get a regular towel. Don't use your pants as napkins.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Let me tell you. I do it. I started out of necessity, and then it just became a convenience, and now I'm not giving that up.

[Tom Segura]

Whatever. This is so upsetting. I'm switching the topic.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Why don't you give it a try? And then you'll see. You're gonna like the way you look.

[Tom Segura]

Bottoms need to start lying about douching.

[Caller/Listener]

Like, y' all really should just start doing that. If a man on grinder sniffies hits you up and says, hey, are you douche?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Are you clean?

[Tom Segura]

Just be like, yeah, yeah, I am. Because tops don't deserve respect. They don't.

[Caller/Listener]

Like, let's be for real. Not only that, though, but if you have a good diet, like, you're gonna come out clean most of the time. Like, you'll be chill. And I'm not gonna lie, if you're hot enough, a lot of these tops will still keep going. They'll just use the as extra loop. Like, be real. But yeah, like, just start lying, like, just on the. Because, like, tops don't deserve respect.

[Tom Segura]

They don't. They don't.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Do you think tops don't deserve respect?

[Tom Segura]

I mean, that's wild. This is new to me. I don't know. But I do think it's kind of wild to be like, I'm gonna lie and say I'm clean, and then if there's too much there, just use it as lube. That's wild, you know? Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Can I. But real talk.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I might lie, too. Oh, if I might, I might. Like, let's say I can't get around to anal douching, but I really like you, and I really want to be bottom that night. I might be like, dude, it's fine. And what if I know it's fine? Like, what if I know my smells like your dad said?

[Tom Segura]

What do you. What do you know is fine?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What if I just knew? Like, okay, I had a big salad. I took a big dump this morning. I'm pretty clean.

[Tom Segura]

No, no, that's not. That's not. No, you're. You're. You're. Okay, hold on. So, yeah, the lie. The lie that you're doing is you're saying it's all. I'm all clean down there.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yes.

[Tom Segura]

Just because to get laid and then during it, you're going to have to deal with the fact that there's shit Falling out.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

If there's shit falling out.

[Tom Segura]

Well, you haven't cleaned yourself, so you can't just go like, well, I. You don't know. You're not clean. There is shit.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

But what he's saying is sometimes you don't need to douche.

[Tom Segura]

Right? Right.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You might not. It's not a given. First of, I. I have. I have one gay friend. Yeah, I have one gay friend. I have one black friend.

[Tom Segura]

That's all you need.

[Caller/Listener]

Who?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I run stuff.

[Tom Segura]

That's all you need. Don't ever up those numbers. Go ahead.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Never will. Yeah, but he tells me. He's like, look, it's a fallacy that every time you do butt sex that you brown everywhere. He's like, it's just not the case.

[Tom Segura]

I understand.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Especially the older gayer you are. You've done it. You know what's in there.

[Tom Segura]

So you're saying I want to roll the dice and if there is a ton of that just falls out, I'll just be like, I guess.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, but these fools are used to it. It's their use the as extra L. That's what. That's what they do, right?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I don't know.

[Tom Segura]

I don't know.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I gotta ask my gay friend if they use this any.

[Tom Segura]

What do you think? Isn't this.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I didn't listen to a damn word that said I.

[Tom Segura]

You remember the cat report?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

The cat report just got a new entry and let me tell you, it's the gay voice. Okay? Why.

Why do you need.

He doesn't need to talk like that.

He doesn't need to.

[Tom Segura]

But I can't even hear a word.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

He'S saying because I'm just like, what is this act?

[Tom Segura]

Wow.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I just.

Because he's signaling to others what his preference. That way they know.

Yeah, but that's crazy.

It's like. It's like a bird call.

I get it.

It's like crazy now you know.

So you just calling out for. For dick all day. Like, that's how you talk on the regular. You talk professional.

Just like white girls talk. Like I do. Like, oh my God. Like, it's just like what you do culturally. Like, I hang out. I know I totally. I'm the best. But the point is, is that it's just cultural. It's your. It's your peeps. But when I hang out with my Valley friends growing up, I fall into it pretty fast.

Right, but what you're talking about is code switching, co switching. Everybody does.

[Tom Segura]

But maybe is. Wouldn't the argument be for him then that he is code switching because he's doing a purposely gay video for a gay audience.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

No, only because I bet you this dude talks like that all day.

He does. All day long, all the time. And, like, how is it that their face just looks gay? Like, I. If I. Like, I look at him and I'm like, dude, he's not. Like, there's no way this guy's straight.

[Tom Segura]

You just know he's smiling.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

He's smiling too much. Look at every picture that we've taken as a studio. See if I'm smiling in any of those.

Because happiness makes you happy.

[Tom Segura]

You do smile sometimes. You never smile?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

No. Not in pictures.

[Tom Segura]

Wait, in life, you've never smiled?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I'm not saying I've never smiled, but name me the last time he does.

[Tom Segura]

I don't know.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

He's not a smiler.

So why are you so smiley?

[Tom Segura]

What's so.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What's there to be so smiley about?

[Tom Segura]

Well, maybe you're smiling because you're gonna lie about whether you douche or not, and then you'll just deal with it.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You see, I don't have that problem. I don't. There's nothing to smile about out there.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, that's true.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, just. You ain't going.

[Caller/Listener]

Please, Please.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yes.

[Caller/Listener]

Can someone set up a fart male white orgy for free for me? Can they invite me somewhere at least? I still want to get a fartman white porn, but please get someone to invite me to a free fart mail orgy, please.

[Tom Segura]

Did you guys who set this up know that we've had him on the show?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

No, there's no way this guy's been on the show, but, like, a million. This is like the Silver Lake days.

[Tom Segura]

This is the beautiful Guppies.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, yeah, we love him. Oh, I thought there was a chance.

[Tom Segura]

Because it's an old clip. Yeah, this is. This is. This is the guy who wants white men in gray sweatpants who have farts. Beautiful guppies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He gets hard when he. That's. The time is now. Remember, the time is.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

The time is now.

[Tom Segura]

That's. That's him farting in his face. Yeah, yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, the time is now.

[Tom Segura]

The time is now.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

He's very sincere. So this guy.

[Tom Segura]

This guy's totally legit. She's not a bitch. It.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And we actually even hooked him up with a porno company.

[Tom Segura]

Yes.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

To make a white man fart porn.

[Tom Segura]

Into his mouth, he wants a white male fart orgy. That's what he's saying in this video.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And he's sincere. This is not a joke.

[Tom Segura]

Great guy.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah. Sweetheart. What a sweetheart. I bet. I bet he douches before he bottoms. Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

He doesn't want you to, though. He wants you to fart those farts, right? This is outrageous.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah, well, those are rates, man.

[Tom Segura]

This is a big job. Up. Where does the kiss come in? Oh, I don't understand.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

See, he looks good.

[Tom Segura]

I like to be kissed when I'm getting. Oh, I'll tell you what.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I'll meet you halfway.

[Tom Segura]

You lower the bill. No, I'll. Your kisser, though. Open wide.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Does anybody ever do this when they're thinking in real life, you know, why do actors do that?

[Tom Segura]

Actors? I don't know if I would call these actors.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

They're better than me.

[Tom Segura]

You see Gary Oldman and Daniel Day Lewis going.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

But nobody in real IRL does.

[Tom Segura]

No, no. Well, you do if you're like. Like, if you're talking about like a real moment where somebody, you know, they put their hand somewhere, they go like. They're thinking, yeah, they might. They might do. But they don't look at you and go, I might. Where you talk out of. They don't do that usually.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You know, just one acting class is all these guys would need to get.

[Tom Segura]

I'm so glad they didn't. It's so much better this way. All these clips.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Can they have a much better coach, for God's sake? Just, you know, one of the famous Hollywood people just to come in and.

[Tom Segura]

It would ruin it.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Go through the scene work.

[Tom Segura]

It would ruin time. I would ruin it. I would. I'm so glad that they didn't do those types of things.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What? One more time.

[Tom Segura]

What? Oh, yeah. That guy is like, how about we your mouth? He goes, what? That guy was great.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Do they have the porn?

[Tom Segura]

And then he gets right on his knees. That's the only thing is, like, if you were, like, directing that scene the way he did, what was perfect? Do you have that one?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And also question, do they have a bad acting porn award? I know they have the AVNs for scenes, but they should have acting awards. Pornography.

[Tom Segura]

I know. Like, best actual acting.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And that's what they should call it, best actual acting. Because they get performance for their.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Right.

[Tom Segura]

But they should get, like an actual acting award or even, like.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Like the Razzies or whatever. What? Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And then the next thing he does, he gets right on his knees. See, I would have had that guy if I were directing that scene. I'd be like, no, no. Like, keep that same resistance going for a while.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah. I mean, right? And the guy. And then there should be more dialogue, though. Yeah. Like what?

[Tom Segura]

Because they convince him right away.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

They're like, get on our knees and suck our dicks. And he goes, yeah. What? And then they just grab. He's like, all right. And then he just sucks their dicks.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Right. A little hesitance. A lady has to pretend a little that she doesn't want to do it.

[Tom Segura]

It's just. Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Where's the scene? You guys pull it up.

[Tom Segura]

Hold on.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

We're finding it.

[Tom Segura]

One second.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You would like to use.

[Tom Segura]

This is a McDonald's drive through.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

My queen. Who is this angel? I had a girl. Can I. My. Listen. I normally don't believe in abusing.

[Tom Segura]

I know. Drive through people.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

But however McDonald's and I know your father rest in peace, would agree with me. Their service has become appallingly diabolically bad. Poor service lately. Hi. Welcome to. Have you used the app to order today? No. You. That's why I'm here talking to a person.

[Tom Segura]

I know.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I don't want to use an app for everything in my life.

[Tom Segura]

I do think you. The only thing that gets about this is the. Is that she farted. And then put the car and drive to drive. Like the move is do that and then order.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Go.

[Tom Segura]

You should have ordered.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Not just leave.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Don't get scared.

[Tom Segura]

All right, here we go.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Here's an amazing scene. Get off your asses and back to work.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Come on, man.

[Tom Segura]

We're taking a break. Your break. There's 15 cars here that need to be serviced. Now get back. That's still good. Come here. The only thing needs servicing around here is our Good. Get on your knees and beg like a. What? This is great. He's nailing it. That is good.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

That other guy was great. He's like, get on your knees and suck our.

[Tom Segura]

And the way that this guy's reacting to that ridiculous demand is how to do it.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

I feel like you can see it in his face though, that he's about to fold.

Because it's not a convincing. What? He's not really taken aback. What?

[Tom Segura]

But then he didn't feel the tone is perfect. Does it keep going? Do you have the rest of it or. No, I think that's where our. Oh, that's. If you. If you pull up the act. Because we. How do you know One time. Then the. The scene is he says that and they just follow up with their demand and then they pull him down. See, I think this level of like being incredulous.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Is what he needed to Carry through the scene more.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I agree. Because those two guys like, why don't you suck our dicks? And he's their manager. He's.

[Tom Segura]

There's 15 cars here that need servicing you. And they're like, shut up.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

And he's like, okay, it's. That's way too soon to surrender. There's a power dynamic happening here.

[Tom Segura]

It's your employees. Yeah, it's insane.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Imagine if this exchange happened between you and employees here. Like, no way.

[Tom Segura]

Go ahead.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Way more time.

[Tom Segura]

Tell me to suck your dick.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

No one.

Go ahead, Cougar. Go for it.

Cougar, you know the lines. The only thing that needs servicing around here. So Tom, you start them off with Cougar.

[Tom Segura]

You go, okay, guys, there's 15 shows that haven't been edited. Get in there and get to work. Come on, man. We're on our break. I don't give a fuck about your break. Get in that editing bay and cut those shows. Why don't you get. Why don't you get on your knees and beg? Suck our car. I fucking know what. Okay.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Yeah. And now that I see you workshop it.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I see the flaws in the emotion. There's no emotional arc that makes sense.

[Tom Segura]

Just start blowing them right away. That's the big flaw.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

They blew the arc of that whole scene.

[Tom Segura]

Anyway. I'm willing to do scene study work with these adult performers.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I think you should.

[Tom Segura]

It could be fun. Helps me too. You know, I'm trying to work on it too. I'm Emmy nominated.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Oh, that's true. You should have a workshop for porno actors.

[Tom Segura]

Workshop for porno.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

That could be a great thing we do. Okay, I'd like to remind everybody before we head out, Tom's original art. My artwork of Tom and the bear. A thousand dollars on YMH Studios lighting.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, you have the sticker over my.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Genitals because we got flagged on services. Also around and find out. The prints are for sale. For sale.

[Tom Segura]

The original's gone.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Original's gone. $60,000.

[Tom Segura]

This was a lot of fun. Thank you for watching. Thank you for listening. I'm on tour. The tour is going to end December 6th, I think.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, so what? So you can get tickets now. Tomskira.com tour I'm taping myself special in Milliwake, Wisconsin. The shows, by the way, that are being taped for Netflix. I'm type. I'm taping three shows and right now the 15th is all sold out in Milwaukee, but we added a show in 14th, which is a taping day for us. As well if you want to get tickets to that tomskir.com tour. Look, if you're in that area, somewhere in Wisconsin, even if you're in Chicago, come up to Milwaukee. It's going to be a really fun experience. I can't wait to tape it there at the Riverside Theater. So I hope to see you there again. There's a bunch of dates on [e-mail] tour. Thank you very much. Check it out. See you next week. Try it out.

[Caller/Listener]

All I'm saying is, why is it gay for a female. Well, for a man to be okay with his female licking his ass during sex. What you heard me. What you heard me I'm an ass what you heard me what you heard me? I'mma ask what you heard me what you heard me I'mma ask what you heard what you heard? I'm an ass if my would let me lick his ass I would lick the out of his ass like eat pussy, say that she gay and you got to be honest, fellas it feel good to have your ass lick what you heard, baby? What you heard me? I'm a asthma what you heard me? What you heard me? I'm a asthma what you heard me? What you heard, baby? I'm an ass what you heard me? What you heard me? I'm an ass Lick, lick, lick, lick.

[Tom Segura]

My ass Lick, lick, lick, lick, lick my ass.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

What'S in it for me?

[Tom Segura]

Knowing that you're blowing your husband's mind?

[Christina Pazsitzky]

Would you wax it?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

You promise?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Christina Pazsitzky]

I get to lick your ass.

[Caller/Listener]

What you heard me what you heard me I'm my ass Fuck what you heard me Fuck what you heard me I'm an ad Fuck what you heard me Fuck what you heard me I'm an ad Fuck what you heard me Fuck what you heard me I'm an adult.