GHOST OF A CHANCE and SONG OF DEATH BARRIE CRAIG PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR

Summary

1001 Radio Crime Solvers
Host: Jon Hagadorn
Episode: "Ghost of a Chance" and "Song of Death" (Barrie Craig, Private Investigator)
Air Date: April 10, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode features two classic golden-age radio mysteries from the Barrie Craig, Private Investigator series: "Ghost of a Chance" and "Song of Death." In host Jon Hagadorn’s introduction, listeners are reminded of radio’s heyday, when hard-boiled detectives and clever sleuths captivated audiences. These stories showcase Barrie Craig’s blend of wisecracks, tough investigative work, and a knack for unraveling the most convoluted mysteries.

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Case 1: Ghost of a Chance

Main Theme

A routine insurance investigation quickly spirals into an eerie case involving the supposed resurrection of a dead man, elaborate fraud, and a murderous conspiracy.

Key Discussion Points & Plot Highlights

• Unusual Assignment

  • Insurance agent Eli Sampson hires Barrie Craig to unofficially look into a possible insurance fraud related to a man named Remo Torch, who allegedly died in a subway accident. An anonymous phone call claims the company was defrauded; the death and subsequent payout to the widow might be a setup.
  • [03:12]
    • Craig (sarcastically): “I catch. In case you're pulling a boner. That's a beaut. Harassing innocent people?”
    • Sampson (nervous): “Yes.”

• A Dead Widow, a Missing Body, and a ‘Living Corpse’

  • Craig discovers that Remo Torch’s widow is dead ([05:56]) and soon after, in a night-time graveyard visit, the caretaker swears he sees Remo rise from his grave ([07:39]).
  • Caretaker Billings (terrified, 07:40): “Risen dead... I watched him go off not making a sound and walking in a funny little hop.”

• Ghostly Encounters & Unmasking the Impostor

  • Craig follows the ‘resurrected’ Remo to a bar and then to a mysterious meeting with a woman named Verna Talbot ([10:19–11:31]). The encounter becomes violent as Remo attacks her, believing she is his wife.
  • Craig (12:09): “Let go of her, mister. Suppose we postpone introductions for later.”

• The Investigation Deepens

  • In private, the ‘revenant’ Remo tells Craig he remembers only his death—he was pushed in front of a train by a man who looked exactly like him ([16:06–17:12]).
  • Remo Torch (16:44): “Seeing him was like looking into a mirror and seeing myself.”

• Unraveling the Swindle

  • With clever legwork, Craig discovers that not only was Remo’s grave empty, but his widow’s coffin is full of rocks ([20:50]). Both supposed deaths were faked as part of an insurance scam.
  • Billings (20:45): “No body, Mr. Craig. The casket’s full—full of rocks.”
  • Undertaker Eric Carter, who is also Verna’s boyfriend, supervised the fraudulent burials ([21:14]).

• Showdown and Confession

  • Craig confronts Eric Carter (aka George Talbot) and Verna: Remo hired a lookalike actor to fool his enemies, while Carter and Verna were running the scam to collect insurance and eliminate Remo ([25:12–27:04]).
  • Craig (26:24): “The actor came down the steps of Torch's house every morning, stopped at the same newsstand, then went into the subway to ride to his office as Torch would. Am I right on that, Torch?”

• Danger and Resolution

  • Carter turns violent, but is quickly disarmed after a short struggle.
  • Remo’s enemies are exposed, and the ingenious plot is brought to light amid gunfire and dramatic revelations ([27:13–28:09]).

Memorable Quotes

• Craig (09:23): “The case was coming to life—but literally.”
• Sampson (13:13): “Handle this delicately, as if we have nothing to do with it. Like it's a case of your own.”
• Remo (17:12): “He was behind me, this man with my face. A train was coming in... I could feel... hands threw me forward.”

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Case 2: Song of Death

Main Theme

Craig becomes entangled in a dangerous web of song-publishing deceit, a near drowning, blackmail, and murder, all revolving around the hit song "Sugarloaf Mama."

Key Discussion Points & Plot Highlights

• The Mermaid Rescue

  • Craig saves a woman, Susan Lane, from the river after an apparent suicide attempt—but soon questions the story ([32:57–33:55]).
  • Susan (33:53): “You are crazy.”
  • Craig (34:02): “Is that proper? How can I know? We've only just met.”

• Songwriting Scandal

  • Susan, a music publisher’s stenographer, is a crucial witness in a lawsuit over "Sugarloaf Mama." Songwriter Mervyn Marlowe and publisher Eli Sampson both lay claim to the hit—Susan’s testimony could swing the case ([37:00–37:25]).
  • Susan (37:06): “I'm a witness for Mr. Sampson... That my boss never personally received a song submitted by Mervyn Marlowe.”

• Clues, Kidnapping, and Murder Attempts

  • A masked man attempts Susan’s life; she is later kidnapped ([39:58–40:41]). An anonymous tip connects the case to the song: “Paste this song title in your hat. Sugarloaf Mama...” ([35:15]).
  • Sampson is shot (self-inflicted to frame Marlowe), and Craig uncovers that the janitor, Lemaire, is an ex-con observing the goings-on ([42:37–47:34]).
  • Lemaire (47:15): “Yes, I have seen this precise pistol before... In Mr. Sampson's desk drawer, the bottom left drawer, if my memory serves.”

• Piecing Together the Truth

  • Marlowe is desperate but claims innocence in Susan’s kidnapping, and Craig realizes Susan’s story doesn’t add up.
  • Craig (54:13): “She can't swim, huh? Look at that Australian crawl. She swims like a fish. Yeah, good old will to self-preservation. I was counting on that to convict her.”

• The Real Scheme Exposed

  • It turns out Susan staged her near-death for leverage, blackmailing Sampson for a share of the profits. The kidnapping was faked with her brother’s help.
  • Craig (54:14): “She wanted to dramatize herself... to bleed Sampson for a big slice of those song profits.”

• Final Twist and Clean-up

  • Susan is arrested; her engagement ring is revealed to be a payoff for perjury. Regulations compel Barry Craig to return the ring ([56:13]).

Memorable Quotes

• Craig and Susan (34:27–34:39):
  • Susan: “Penny for your thoughts?”
  • Craig: “I'm wondering about how many lies you're going to tell before you tell the truth.”
• Craig (35:15): “The song’s the key to the whole deal. With a girl. Now make like a detective.”
• Lemaire (43:09): “You're staring at me.”
  • Craig: “Trying to place you. I've seen that odd kisser of yours before.”

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Notable Timestamps & Segments

• [03:04] — Craig learns the case background from Eli Sampson.
• [05:56] — The janitor reports ‘widow Torch’ is dead.
• [07:40] — Caretaker claims to witness the dead rise at the cemetery.
• [10:23–11:31] — The mysterious phone call and meeting in Burnside Park.
• [16:06–17:12] — Remo recounts his ‘death’ and the lookalike.
• [20:45] — Discovery of the coffin full of rocks.
• [25:12–27:04] — Craig exposes the insurance scam in a confrontation.
• [32:57–34:05] — Craig saves Susan Lane and begins questioning her story.
• [37:00] — Craig begins unraveling the song rights lawsuit.
• [47:15] — The janitor's knowledge about the gun and office secrets comes to light.
• [54:13] — Craig exposes Susan Lane’s swimming (and lying) abilities, breaking the case.
• [56:13] — Regulations force Craig to return the ring—a “dearest possession,” but evidence of the scam.

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Tone & Language

The episode is packed with hardboiled banter, droll wisecracks, and cynical observations—trademark features of Barrie Craig’s style. The pace is brisk, with Craig delivering sharp commentary on the suspects and plot twists at every stage.

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Summary

In these two interlinked mysteries, Barrie Craig navigates a labyrinth of deceit—first unmasking a chilling ‘resurrection’ insurance swindle, and then untangling a web of lies in the competitive world of songwriting. Both stories highlight Craig’s tenacity, skepticism, and dry humor. He exposes not just criminal schemes, but the ambitious, scheming hearts at their center—always with a wry, weary take on human nature and the criminal mind.

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For fans of radio’s golden age and detective stories, this episode is a treasure trove of suspense, seat-of-the-pants investigating, and classic noir repartee.

Transcript

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[Caretaker Sam Billings]

welcome back everyone to 1001 Radio Crime Solvers. This is your host, John Hagedorn. Get ready for Barry Craig, Confidential Investigator.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

The National Broadcasting Company presents William Gargant in another transcribed drama of mystery and adventure with America's number one detective, Barry Craig. Confidential Investigator.

[Barry Craig]

Barry Craig, speaking on call like I am as a confidential investigator. The open door. Come one, come all. You don't always get cases that run, according to Hoyle. Every once in a while you catch yourself a lulu. A case that puts a strain on your imagination. A case, say, in the category of Spookaroo. You find yourself hobnobbing with ghosts and talking turkey to the one like that began for me in the New York office of the Trans Southern Insurance Company of Omaha. I've been urgently requested to come calling, please by a claims agent named Brenahan. Roy C. Brenahan.

[Eli Sampson]

I'll explain the assignment we have for you.

[Barry Craig]

Craig, before you do, answer me this, what's with your regular investigators. Why pull an outsider in?

[Eli Sampson]

Well, we want this investigated unofficially. We don't want to stir up anything that will expose us to a libel suit.

[Barry Craig]

I catch. In case you're pulling a boner. That's a beaut. Harassing innocent people.

[Eli Sampson]

Yes.

[Barry Craig]

What's the story?

[Eli Sampson]

Our file number 15466. Double indemnity. Case now officially closed. We paid out $50,000 to the widow of a subway accident victim named Remo torch. This was 90 days ago. So I'll now play you a recording I secretly made of an anonymous telephone call I was party to yesterday. Carefully, Craig.

[Barry Craig]

Hello?

[Mervyn Marlowe]

Hello, Mr. Roy Brenahan, please.

[Eli Sampson]

This is Roy Brenahan speaking.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

I've got some information for you.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Yes?

[Mervyn Marlowe]

Your company paid a $50,000 claim to a Mrs. Remo torch three months ago. You remember it?

[Barry Craig]

Of course.

[Eli Sampson]

Remo Torch fell to his death off a subway platform. What about it?

[Mervyn Marlowe]

The claim was a fraud. It wasn't Remo Torch who fell under a train.

[Eli Sampson]

But his widow identified the body.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

The identification was false.

[Eli Sampson]

Who are you?

[Mervyn Marlowe]

A friend.

[Barry Craig]

Goodbye, mister.

[Eli Sampson]

Wait. Don't hang up. Identify yourself and there's a bonus. But my anonymous caller hung up Craig without identifying himself. I thought about it overnight and today I called you in.

[Barry Craig]

Oh, it could be a crank call or an envious relative with a weird sense of humor. You must get a thousand crackpot telephone calls. Yes, we do.

[Eli Sampson]

We can't ignore them. Even if there's the smallest possibility of

[Barry Craig]

recovering a paid out claim. Yeah, I've heard about insurance claims agents. The fanatical watchdogs you fellows get to be. You're hoping and praying I turn up a scheming widow and proof that a third party was pushed off that subway platform and the corpse palmed off on you as Remo Torch.

[Eli Sampson]

Handle this delicately, as if we have nothing to do with it. Like it's a case of your own.

[Barry Craig]

I can't be too delicate about exhuming a body. I need to get a court order for that. So do you want to get yourself another boy?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

No.

[Eli Sampson]

I'll stick with you, Craig.

[Barry Craig]

Or be stuck with me. 10%, Brenahan. Any monies I recover for good old Trans Southern earmark. 10% for Barry Craig. While waiting for red tape to unravel on the court order for exhumation of a corpse, I. I went to see the scheming widow. 169 Seneca street was her last known address. A street where the drunks outnumbered everybody else. I ran into a very curious development at 169seneca no, widow Torch. The janitor, who looked like his mind wandered, explained the widow's absence.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Widow Torch is dead.

[Barry Craig]

A dead policyholder and a dead, though rich beneficiary. I had quite a cast of live suspects. The next evening I drove myself to the Hillcrest Cemetery on Sycamore street out in Long island where the mangled remains of Remo Torch had been buried. I had a signed court order okaying exhumation to serve on the caretaker there, an old geezer named Sam Billings. Going through the big iron gate, I heard the night chimes. Night is a nice time to go calling on a graveyard if you hate yourself. Every superstition you had as a kid comes back to haunt you. You begin to see things and hear things. Going up a narrow path toward the caretaker's house, I heard things. A scream, as if somebody was being murdered not 50 yards away. I got to the scream. It was the old caretaker, Billings, on the ground near an open grave in a dead faint. Caretaker came to Popeyed as if he'd seen the devil and clawing at me as if I was the devil. Quit it, Billings. Keep choking me and I'll have to flatten you. I'm Barry Craig, a confidential investigator now concentrating on insurance. Now, if you can collect your wits, old man.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

You're an investigator.

[Barry Craig]

Who'd you think I was?

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Him.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Him who?

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Risen dead.

[Barry Craig]

Makes sense, old man.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

I was making my rounds, like every night, when I heard a noise. Noise I'll never forget if I live to be a hundred.

[Barry Craig]

The odds are away against you. The hypertension you've got.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

I turned to look, bringing my light close, and it was the lid of a coffin coming off as if by itself.

[Barry Craig]

Neatest trick of the century. And then what happened?

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

I left him.

[Barry Craig]

We've already been through that.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Then the dead man got up and stood there alive as you're standing here all green under the moon.

[Barry Craig]

How does the rest of the hallucination go?

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

I watched him go off not making a sound and walking in a funny little hup.

[Barry Craig]

And then you screamed and fainted dead away. The next thing you knew, you had your fingernails in my neck. Now get your bearings and throw a light on that coffin. I want to have a look.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

See? The casket is empty.

[Barry Craig]

Empty it is. So a stiff came to, forced the lid open, turned green under the moon and then went on the town.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

It's something to believe, but I saw it with my own eyes.

[Barry Craig]

If that 2020 vision you don't have. Did you also see who dug them up? That's what I asked if you'll really open your eyes. Six feet of dirt piled in two neat hills on both sides of the grave. See it?

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Yes.

[Barry Craig]

To get out from under, your stiff needed a muscular accomplice on the outside who was supposed to be buried in that grave. I can't make out the name on the tombstone.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Torch. Remote torch.

[Barry Craig]

The case was coming to life, but literally. I left caretaker Billings to sleep off his jitters and got into my car. Driving down tree shaded Sycamore street, my headlights picked up a character moving along the sidewalk in a funny little hop. A funny little hop were exactly the words the caretaker had used describing his stiff who'd come alive. My man on the sidewalk was loping along like that, a kind of hop skip, like a guy who had no control over his reflexes. I switched from brights to dims, slowed the car down to a crawl and trailed him into a tavern. A big neon sign advertised as Barnstable Inn. I went in after him. My man wasn't after eats or bottle goods. He was out to make a phone call. I watched him thumb through a directory,

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

then get into a booth.

[Barry Craig]

As soon as it was safe, I eased into the adjourning booth to hear what I could hear.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

I must see you at once tonight. Well, you must come in Burnside park, near the Funk.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

I'll be there waiting for you.

[Barry Craig]

I watched him start for the open door of the tavern. I checked the phone directory where he'd left it open and read off the name. Where his fingernail had left a line under it. Mrs. Verna Talbot, it said. 2580 Merrydale Drive. A guy risen from the dead was dating a woman. I was right there in Burnside park in a grandstand seat behind a row of bushes when they met. My man was hanging off to his side as if he wasn't really meeting the woman but ambushing her. I could hear her high heels clicking toward him.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

Hello, Mary.

[George Talbot]

Mary? You're calling me Mary?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Yes.

[George Talbot]

You're not who you said you were on the telephone.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

No, I'm not. It was a ruse to get you to come. I'll come out of the shadows so you can see my face.

[George Talbot]

Well, your face is chalk.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

It's a dead face.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

And your eyes, they're dead eyes.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

Mary, I've been dead.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

But I've come back. I've come back to claim you.

[Barry Craig]

Mary. Mary, my wife.

[George Talbot]

I'm not your Mary or your wife.

[Susan Lee]

I don't even know you.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Let me go.

[Barry Craig]

He wasn't just claiming her, he was strangling her. I got busy Let go of her, mister. Suppose we postpone introductions for later. He might have been risen from the dead, but he reacted to the old one too. Like anybody else, he was out cold, stiff like rigor mortis had come back. While he slept it off, I revived the dame and questioned her. I'm Barry Craig, an investigator. Madam, I'd like a few honest facts and no ad libbing. Remember? I probably just saved your life.

[George Talbot]

I'm grateful. The man is insane.

[Barry Craig]

You acted as if you didn't know him.

[George Talbot]

I never saw him before in my life.

[Barry Craig]

He's allegedly a Remo Torch.

[Susan Lee]

He.

[George Talbot]

He said he'd come back from the dead.

[Barry Craig]

So far as we know right now. Could be. If you don't know the man at all, why did you agree to meet him here?

[George Talbot]

He telephoned me and said he was Tom Avery. I've known a Tom Avery.

[Barry Craig]

Your name is Mrs. Verna Talbot?

[George Talbot]

Why, yes. How did you know?

[Barry Craig]

Never mind how. You live with your husband?

[George Talbot]

Yes, I do. But he mustn't know I came here to meet Tom Avery.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Jealous?

[George Talbot]

Yes. We get along badly, my husband and I. We're together, but we live separate lives.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Oh.

[George Talbot]

May I please go now?

[Barry Craig]

Sure. I don't see why not. I watched her melt into the night, half half mink, half woman. Then I sat down to rest up, take stock and wait. I'd sure find myself a bright way of making a living. There I was in a public park at 2am waiting for a corpse to rise for the second time in one night. This time out of dreamland. Remo Torch, or whoever he really was, slowly came out of the dream dreamland I'd rocked him into. He got up on his feet, rubbing his jaw where I'd clipped him with a wild gleam in his eye and his teeth showing as if he were getting set to jump me. I threw a gun on him fast. Don't try anything, Torch, or I'll prove to you that dead men bleed. Gonna do what I say? Nice and cooperatively, I'll do what you say. My car's outside the park. We'll get into it and drive to my apartment.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

To your apartment?

[Barry Craig]

For a heart to heart talk. Shake your head and I turn you over to the cops. It's all a choice you've got right now. Me or the cops.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

I'll go with you.

[Barry Craig]

I got him home with me.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Okay.

[Barry Craig]

And put him to bed. When he fell asleep, I handcuffed him to the bed and tied his feet. Then I showered and waited for daylight. In a good morning Chat with Lieutenant Trav, Rogers Willie's Coffee Pot. I don't get half of what you told me, Craig. Half's enough to hold you for now. Feed ghost stories to little boys a spoonful at a time. An old teacher of mine used to say, just you run down a few items I asked, huh, pal? You want me to find out when Mary Torch died and who signed the death certificate, and where was she buried? Call me the minute you know, Craig. Yeah. Being your blind helper, just how did

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

I get so degraded?

[Barry Craig]

The coffee's my treat. Have yourself a second cup, chum. Torch was wide awake when I got back from Trav Rogers. I untied his feet but kept the handcuffs on. All recovered from your busy night, Torch?

[Mervyn Marlowe]

What do you want with me?

[Barry Craig]

I'll settle for the story of your life.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

I can only remember the story of my death. I died August 28, 1951.

[Barry Craig]

Okay, I'll play straight man. Go ahead and tell me the story of your death.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

My last day alive was a Friday. After breakfast, I left home and my wife Mary to be take a subway train downtown. In the subway, the express platform was crowded, as it always was. But waiting for my train, I could feel one man closest to me.

[Barry Craig]

Why, this one man?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

He went everywhere I went.

[Barry Craig]

What did he look like?

[Mervyn Marlowe]

Seeing him was like looking into a mirror and seeing myself.

[Barry Craig]

He resembled you.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

This man who was always behind me was a man with my face.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Oh, go on.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

He was behind me, this man with my face. A train was coming in. I heard its warning sound, and then I saw it come at me, hissing like an iron dragon with enormous eyes that held me spellbound. I tried to push back, but hands threw me forward.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Forward, into the jaws of the iron dragon. No.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

That's how I died. August 28th, three months ago. You don't believe the story of my death.

[Barry Craig]

When I do, peddle me to Bellevue. That's how you were supposed to have died August 28th last. That's the phony story in the Trans Southern insurance files. You were supposed to have died like that, Torch, only you didn't. Somebody else did.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

Somebody else did?

[Barry Craig]

Yeah, the patsy whose remains were identified as Remo Torch. The poor devil who was really in that coffin you supposedly stepped out of last night. Excuse me. Barry Craig speaking. Barry, this is Trav Rogers. Mary Torch died a month ago. A heart attack. And Eric Carter signed the death certificate. She was buried in Hillcrest Cemetery like her husband before her. I got it. Thanks, Trav. Can I be of any further service to you? Yeah, you can send one of your Boys, over to my apartment. I've got a prize package I want under lock and key while I roam the world. I had the graveyard habit. There I was again at Hillcrest Cemetery, waving another court order at old caretaker Billings. This time with the name Mary Torch spelled out on it. Old Billings read the court order, sneaking a little foolish grin at me as he read.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Used to be in order.

[Barry Craig]

Mr. Craig, can you round up a couple of diggers right away? They can build transuthern for the labor.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

It's easy to do for a guy

[Barry Craig]

hoodooed by the risen dead last night. You're looking mighty cheerful today. I'll bet at Tombstone you solved the mystery of the empty coffin for yourself.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

You're a discerning man, Mr. Craig.

[Barry Craig]

You found a body somewhere. The body. The real Remo Torch sneaked out of that coffin before he got into it. It's time for you to come along and get an eyeful. I'm right, huh?

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

You're right and I'm a foolish old man.

[Barry Craig]

Where'd you find the body that was buried as remo torch?

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Not 20ft from where we're standing.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Show me.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Right here by those flower beds. It was very shallow. Flowers had been tramped down and I went to investigate. I saw the dirt had been turned over brush. And then I noticed a foot.

[Barry Craig]

A foot sticking cut leaves. Something to my imagination. Now go round up those diggers. The slab of marble read Mary Torch. Two beefy gents were digging her up. They wore a look on their kisses that said they just loved to make an argument of it. They were the same team who buried the Mary Torch coffin only a month ago. To them I was some creep when doing a work of art. Me and my court order. You've got the coffin exposed enough men. Now use the crowbar on it. I soon got a look at the contents of the Coffin.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

No body, Mr. Craig. The casket's full.

[Barry Craig]

Full is the word, Billings. Full of rocks. The answer to the rocks was obvious. Mary Torch's death was a phony and ditto a burial. I found out how it was maneuvered by an entry in the cemetery record book.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

It's the name of the undertaker you

[Barry Craig]

want or whoever supervised the so called burial.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Here it is. Mary Torch. An Eric Carter supervised the barrier. Does the name mean something to you?

[Barry Craig]

Does it? Eric Carter's the same joker who also signed the phony medical certificate. The great insurance swindle and how it was accomplished began to stitch into one piece. I had almost all the answers. Enough answers anyhow to parlay into A climax. Only somebody was working his own idea of a climax. A climax to Barry Craig. I'd left Hillcrest through the big iron gates for the drive back to Manhattan. I switched on the ignition. Good thing the cemetery was convenient. Took all the fuss and bolt bother out of my burial. The risen dead. I was getting a whack at the trick myself. I was dragging toward a light. Light no bigger than an arrowhead, waiting for me somewhere at the end of a long sleep. And bells. Bells tolling.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Morning. Morning.

[Barry Craig]

The bells were saying, wake up, Craig. Wake up, Craig. Look at me. And the voice, the face. The face of someone I'd seen around the Trev Rogers. How did you come to die, Trev?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

I didn't. And neither did you.

[Barry Craig]

The miracle is you're in Shore Park Hospital in Emergency. A time bomb hooked to your starter cable. Step on the car starter and blow yourself up. A gimmick with whiskers, a long gray beard. It's an old murder device.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Moth eaten.

[Barry Craig]

But they got you. Craig. How bad am I?

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

You want for Ripley?

[Barry Craig]

I'm okay. Is that what you mean?

[Eli Sampson]

Just lacerations of the head and neck.

[Barry Craig]

Shock. You're wearing more bandages than King Tutorial. You're also minus an automobile. I'll build trans. Get me out of here. I want Remo Torch back. Soon as I'm dressed, he and I are going Bye bye. I taxied Remo Torch across town to an address in my Little Black Book. 2580 Meridale Drive. I'm reuniting you with the lady you made a scene over last night. Torch?

[George Talbot]

Yes, you.

[Barry Craig]

Us. May we come in? But you remember Remo Torch?

[George Talbot]

Why, yes, of course. After last night, could I forget?

[Barry Craig]

I guess not. Especially since he only tried to strangle you. It'd be even harder to forget him if you were his wife.

[George Talbot]

His wife? I'm Verna Talbot. My husband is George Talbot, a manufacturer's representative.

[Barry Craig]

Hooray for employment. Is your husband around?

[George Talbot]

Yes.

[Barry Craig]

Introduce him to us.

[Susan Lee]

Very well.

[George Talbot]

George.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

Yes.

[George Talbot]

Vernon, this is my husband, Mr. Craig.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

That's him.

[Barry Craig]

Him, George? Him who?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

The man with my face. It's my murderer. My murderer.

[Barry Craig]

Get this madman up.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Torch. No more of that.

[Barry Craig]

Let go of him. My apologies for my friend's behavior. Talbot. There does seem to be a superficial resemblance between you. Same general features. Sort of. Nonsense. This man's plainly insane. Insane like a fox. I'd say Torch has a pretty shrewd idea of what he's up to. I'd even say he was trying to drive a couple of schemers Crazy before the law caught up with him.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

I don't understand a thing you're saying, Mr. Craig.

[Barry Craig]

Craig. All Greek to you, huh? Suppose I spell it out and you see if you get the drift. Torch's wife had him marked for murder. The lady wanted to cash in as insurance and then marry her boyfriend, an Eric Carter. The boyfriend began following poor Torch around, waiting for a chance to knock him off. But Torch caught on to what was cooking and figured out a way of outsmarting the schemers. Drop the insanity post, Torch, and tell him how you did it.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

I hired an unemployed bit actor to wear my clothes and play at being me.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

You?

[Barry Craig]

The actor came down the steps of Torch's house every morning, stopped at the same newsstand, then went into the subway to ride to his office as Torch would. Am I right on that, Torch? Yeah. The device worked. You fell for it, Talbot, because you'd never actually met Remo Torch.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

Did you say I fell for it?

[Barry Craig]

I said just that. You pushed a stooge hired by Torch under that train. Madame here identified what was left of the stooge and collected her 50,000. But torch was really alive and kicking all the time. How much does it take to coax a confession out of you, Mr. Eric Carter, alias Talbot? Or you, Mrs. Torch?

[George Talbot]

We're caught, Eric.

[Barry Craig]

Are we, Mary?

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

I rather think I have a little problem. Very much under control. Keep your hands as they are, Craig.

[Barry Craig]

No good, Carter. How far do you think a gun's gonna get you?

[George Talbot]

Oh, I told you we'd lose. Eric, I.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Stop whining, you fool.

[Barry Craig]

Face it, Carter, the lady wants out. The way it's stacking, I'll bet she turns state's evidence. Now drop that gun.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Get back, Craig.

[Barry Craig]

I said drop it.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

You crazy fool.

[Susan Lee]

Let go.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

My.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Oh.

[Barry Craig]

When you shoot somebody, Carter, be sure you keep possession of the gun. Craig, I didn't mean to shoot you.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

It was an accident in the struggle for the gun.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Craig, don't shoot me.

[Barry Craig]

Tit for tat. In a minute I'm going to pass out. I don't want you on the loose when I do. Tit for tat. And the leg. Just enough to make you stay put. Craig, no torture.

[Mervyn Marlowe]

Yes, Craig.

[Barry Craig]

Call police headquarters. Rogers. Lieutenant Trav Rogers. Wake up from a long sleep, and there's the same face in front of you, like a pinup on a wall. Don't look now, Craig, but you're back in Shore Park Hospital Emergency. What's my medical complaint this time? Bullet in your left thigh.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

You'll be out in a week.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

And limp for a month. Oh, great.

[Barry Craig]

Now that you're conscious, you want to talk. Eric Carter masterminded the phony death and burial of Mary Torch and also planted the time bomb. One minute, Craig. Yeah? You're forgetting you played the case very close to the vest that you so far only told me about half of it. Oh, that makes the conclusions I'm giving you a little puzzling, a little incomprehensible. How long did you say I lay over here?

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

A week.

[Barry Craig]

Pull up a bed, Trant. Pull up a bed. I got a long story to tell you as the conscientious officer of the law. I know you want to hear it. Weak as I feel, and long as the story is, I figure it will take about a week to tell. Good night, folks. See you next week.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

You have been listening to William Gargan in another exciting transcribed mystery drama from the adventures of Barry Craig, confidential investigator. William Gargan stars as Barry Craig, confidential investigator.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

There's a big house up there, the river. It always has the welcome mat. Out, folks. Just drop in any old crime.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

The National Broadcasting Company presents William Gargan in another transcribed drama of mystery and adventure with America's number one detective, Barry Craig. Confidential investigator.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Barry Craig speaking. The streamlined confidential operator keeps a case file with a nod to police regulations and with an eye to posterity, a book of memoirs. Someday you figure to show your grandchildren you were full of hustle yourself once upon a time. You keep a well detailed file. Case number of so and so, the nature of the crime, the principal actor, the outcome and page one stating by who and just how were you pulled into the felony in the first place? Take the file in my hand right now. Numbers 113. Who, as in the end of the case, reads Father Neptune. Father Neptune. Old man C case I worked gratis. The old man didn't even throw me a fish. I'd been at a sailing over the west side pier seeing a friend off. I hung around the docks for a while, walking off the champagne and canopies and wondering what there is about a lonesome river at night that makes the little man inside you cry. Well, about that time, Father Neptune decided to take my thoughts off me and transfer them to a mermaid in the Drake. A drowning mermaid, the way it sounded. Where are you? Oh, December is a great month for a dipper to the river if you're a polo bear. But in I went. Hey, hey, grab a hold of me. Hey, I didn't play a stranglehold. Cooperate your rescue, lady, or I'll have to. Okay, much As I hate to. On the pier, it took time to bring her to. I worked her arms pump handle style and water sprayed from her like a fountain. She finally came around to join the battle of the sexes.

[Susan Lee]

You.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

You hit me to break your stranglehold. It's in the book.

[Susan Lee]

What book?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

How to save hysterics from drowning themselves. And the rescuer.

[Susan Lee]

Oh, you didn't have to hit me so hard. Oh, my jaw. Feel the welt.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Hmm. Got my brand on it now. B.C.

[Susan Lee]

b.C.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Barry Craig. The initial Man's ring I'm wearing left initials on your jaw. You're crazy. And cold.

[Susan Lee]

Yeah, me too.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Pray it's pneumonia.

[Susan Lee]

Why that.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

There's no cure for a cold. So there's a cure for pneumonia. Penicillin.

[Susan Lee]

You are crazy.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

You want an ambulance? Definitely not a police wagon.

[Susan Lee]

Don't you dare.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Then what?

[Susan Lee]

Your place.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Is that proper?

[Susan Lee]

How can I know? We've only just met. Barry.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

We got into dry things. And properly enough to rate a good conduct medal from the mayor. I got a hard square look at my mermaid. Okay. A face and a figure that makes truck drivers water their whistles.

[Susan Lee]

Um, Penny for your thoughts?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

I'm wondering about how many lies you're going to tell before you tell the truth.

[Susan Lee]

No more than I can help, I promise.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Your name?

[Susan Lee]

Susan Lee.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

What made you go for a swim?

[Susan Lee]

But I can't swim.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

That's what I mean.

[Susan Lee]

I. I fell into the river by accident. I. I was walking and my foot caught in a loose board on the

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

pier and start all over again.

[Susan Lee]

I wasn't pushed in.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

No?

[Susan Lee]

No. Fact is, I jumped in.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Why?

[Susan Lee]

I'm like that. Peculiar. I get fed up with things.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Things like.

[Susan Lee]

Nothing special, just life.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Men.

[Susan Lee]

The way the world is. I just get an uncontrollably morbid impulse and then. I'm sorry.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

What if nobody happens along to save you for the next impulse?

[Susan Lee]

Goodbye, Susan Lynn. She wasn't much.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Oh, excuse me. Hello. Hello. Have I got the right party? Have you? Well, I mean, are you the Joe who pulled the blonde out of the drink? The name isn't Joe. I followed you to your joint. White guy. And my phone number? Your name's in the bell. Barry Craig. And your number's in the book. I see. Are you interested in hearing what I got to tell you? I've heard nothing so far. Well, open your ears, stupid. Hey, don't believe anything the dame tells you. I don't. What'd she tell you so far? That dill pickles make her hiccup. Okay, be a dope. All right. She said she'd attempted suicide. Baloney. She was tossed into the drink, picked up off the ground and thrown to the fish. You know that I saw. Where do you fit into this? We won't go into that. Another thing. Paste this song title in your hat. Sugarloaf Mama. Sugarloaf Mama. It's number one in the jukebox, you stupid. Where do you spend your nights? Standing up in a closet to improve my posture. The song's the key to the whole deal. With a girl. Now make like a detective. Gun bite. I made like a detective with Susan.

[Susan Lee]

All right, I did lie. Somebody attempted my life.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Who?

[Susan Lee]

Oh, he wore a mask.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

And why?

[Susan Lee]

I don't know.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

We're sure making progress.

[Susan Lee]

I can't tell you what I don't know.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

I suppose I might as well skip asking who was with me on the telephone.

[Susan Lee]

Skip asking me.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

The song, Sugar Loaf, Mama. What about it?

[Susan Lee]

It's a huge popular success.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

I heard.

[Susan Lee]

I work for the music publisher who owns it. I'm a stenographer.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

The publisher owns it, you say? Did the publisher also write the song?

[Susan Lee]

Yes, but that's something now. In dispute between whom, Mr. Sampson, the publisher, my boss and a songwriter, Mervyn Marlowe. They're fighting a lawsuit over the songwrites, over the profits.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

And you come in where?

[Susan Lee]

I'm a witness for Mr. Sampson.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Testifying to what?

[Susan Lee]

That my boss never personally received a song submitted by Mervyn Marlowe. That it's our firm policy to return unsolicited manuscripts unopened.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Who's telling the truth? Your boss Sampson, or this Marlowe?

[Susan Lee]

You ask a lot of questions.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

One of them may be trying to murder you.

[Susan Lee]

Yes, I know.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Don't you care?

[Susan Lee]

Would you?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

What if I do?

[Susan Lee]

Then you'll protect me and worry about me. Now I want to get back into my clothes and go home.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Now. Here you're dirt. The radiator steam dried them. Use the kitchen.

[Susan Lee]

Thanks.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

And don't forget this. This.

[Susan Lee]

Oh, my ring.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Say, quite a rock.

[Susan Lee]

Don't be fooled. It's only a cheap Mexican diamond.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

I'd never believe it. A lightning change of wardrobe and we were on the street arm in arm, like we've been engaged since the high school prom.

[Susan Lee]

Call Cabberry.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Taxi. Hey, taxi. Want company? Going home?

[Susan Lee]

I was wondering when you'd ask me. Get in.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Don't try it, cousin. Huh? You just say something. I said stay out of my cab. Now wait a minute. Oh, you were going to make a quarrel out of his. That was before.

[Susan Lee]

Your gun, Barry.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

The gun's pointing at me, Susan. Yeah. Relax, lady. All you stand to lose is his company. What's my loss? Skin off the top of your head. Now. I want 10 minutes before you phone the cops. One favor, please. What? Do it to me. Over here. Close to the left ear. What's your gag? You're not the first to take a liking to my head. The rest of your head's still sore and on heels. If you're going to. Good. Close to the left. Yeah. You fall down and you get up. You're still the same guy. Except that your legs have aged 10 years and your hat doesn't fit. While looking for a phone booth, I put one and one together. My anonymous caller and the kidnapping cab driver add up to one guy. The same guy. Hello? Give me Lieutenant Trev Rogers, please. You've got him, Craig. Oh, your voice is changing, Trev. Should I worry over losing a squeaky soprano? Is this an official call or are you just passing the time? It's official. What about mayhem in December? I found a girl and lost her. Sad. I can refer you to a lonely hearts club. A torpedo masquerading as a hackie puts a snatch on her. More facts, please. Susan Lane, 5ft 2, blonde, blue eyes, wrinkled dress that needs ironing. Stop prying into my inner life. The hackie, so called was heavy set meat, faced with jowls like Pluto the dog. A brown and white taxi cab. Did you get the license number? No, no, I was about to when I fell down and hurt my head. You were assaulted. If there's a law against slugging confidential investigators. There isn't. We hand out decorations for it here at headquarters. What danger is the girl in? Catching a cold. Catching a cold? A permanent cold. Send out a general alarm, Trav. She's too beautiful to die. Oh, isn't, uh, now no personality. Goodbye now. Eli Sanford, music publisher, occupied a building that looked like an inferiority complex. Council mined streaks for paint outside windows with the dust of ages on them. And a broken down staircase that made you feel like a dinosaur walking on eggs. The staircase was going to loom big in my future, as I soon found out. The first warning I had was a shot. Correction, two shots. And then a yell from an upper lantern. The yell of bloody murder. Enough to freeze me in my tracks. I stood still automatically in the middle of the staircase. And that was my undoing. What sounded like a stampeding herd was coming smack at me. Him was a wild eyed maniac who looked like he jumped out of the straight. Get out of my way, you. I'd Love to oblige, but narrow like this staircase is, it's for Battlenet. I sat out of my way. I'll need time to shift to reverse. Let me do it for you. I got relocated in the world with splinters of railings stuck in me like toothpicks and a guy standing solemnly over me. A janitor holding a mop in a soap bucket. A janitor out of a Mac Senate, comedy, flowing mustache, and dressed in the top half of a cutaway with a batter derby on his head. A brown derby.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

You seem fully recuperated, my boy.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Not recuperated, Only recovered. What was that railing tied together with? Pieces of string?

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

Iron glue. I myself performed the repairs. Here, I'll help you up.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Oh, don't bother. What have you made up for?

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

You refer to my elegance to the

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

mop and the bucket?

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

A temporary condition, my boy.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

The mayor is down.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

The mayor is up.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Up being ducks and bonds. I fluctuate as it fluctuates.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

You're staring at me.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Yeah. Trying to place you. I've seen that odd kisser of yours before.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

Among the stock exchange, perhaps?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

No, no. Who did all that shouting on the upper landing?

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

It was me summoning help.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Who got shot?

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

One Eli Sampson. The miscreant fugitive who butted you so unceremoniously?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

You'll get nuts in your tongue, Lemay. Mind if I leave you for Sampson?

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

Not at all. I am in no mood to be interviewed today. The market is down.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

I found Sampson in his office spluttering his eyelids. How do you feel? Dead. Dead? That makes you a talking corpse. You got a career in vaudeville? I handle that maniac. Mervyn Marlow murdered me. Yeah. Burned your left wrist A little. Only a flesh wound. Not much damage for two point blank. Pistol shot. Oh, I'll lose the arm. I'm sorry to disagree. Then. It's a miracle. Yeah. Music publishers never die. They just fade away. Oh, here's the gun used on you. It was thrown down. Yes. That's the gun the maniac terrorized me with. Give it to me. It's evidence for the district attorney. I'll keep the gun a while, but I'm a licensed detective. This Mervyn Marlowe is a songwriter battling you in the courts. A songwriter? A song thief. He didn't write Sugarloaf, Mama. Lies. His claims are lies. Mervyn Marlow can't even write his own name. He can't shoot straight. That makes him kind of useless all around. Uh, Samson. Yes. Yes. A girl. Susan Lane. Susan Lane? My stenographer. Your late stenographer. Maybe she's been kidnapped. Kidnapped by whom? A test. Hired by Merlin Marlowe. What motive would Marlow have to shut her up? To stop her from testifying to the truth when we go to court. The truth being that nobody here read his song manuscript or even opened the envelope. How big is Marlow's temptation to murder? Come on, Sampson, don't shy at boasting. Sugarloaf mama is a gold mine. Sales and sheet music alone run over $100,000. Motive are plenty to keep blondie from testifying at all costs. He'll kill Susan. You'll find her dead. Where do I find Marlon Marlowe? In a garret in East Harlem. 3601 First Avenue. A crazy bohemian in a cold water garret with a piano. 3601 First Avenue. Call yourself an ambulance, let that wound infect and you'll be the one armed wonder of the music publishing business. Before quitting the building, I looked up Lemaire, the janitor. I found him in the basement washing up.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

Welcome to my humble quarters, my boy.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Dry your face. I've got something to discuss.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

Proceed.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

You clean the offices as well as the halls? Yes.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

The mockery of it.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Being able to use your master key. As you are, you're no doubt well familiar with the contents of the offices. I am.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

After a fashion, that is.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

And after a fashion, also familiar with the content of the desk.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

Do I detect an innuendo that I snoop?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

You detect space and reprehensible slander, my boy.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

As of this moment, consider our discussion terminated.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

This gun, have you ever seen it before? You've seen it in Samson's office? Maybe. Okay, so we're going to play clothes now. This your locker? I asked is this your locker?

[Barry Craig]

It is.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Open it. Why? I want to total up the stamps, the scotch clips and rubber bands. You're a day tall, Lemaire.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

You dare accuse me of the pettiest of thievery?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Yeah, I dare. You see, I placed your odd kisser where I'd seen it before.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

That is the south of France.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Was it the Rogues gallery? It was Weldon, Lemaire, Angelus, the Baron. And what's snatching ladies handbags if not their petty thievery? Not so loud. I lose face with the building management. Tell me what I want to know.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

Yes, I have seen this precise pistol before.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Where?

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

In Mr. Sampson's desk drawer. The bottom left drawer, if my memory serves. You've cost me a pretty piece of change.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

The blackmail you could have wrung out of Sanford. So it's Samson's own gun, huh?

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

The old reprobate shot himself.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

The old reprobate sure did. Visiting the rundown Garrett, the songwriter Mervyn Marlow lived in. I got a smell of trouble even before I asked in. Who's there? I didn't need x ray vision to know a crackpot songwriter. On the other side of the door was healed with a gun. Who's there? I want to talk to you, Marlow. The door's unlocked. Come in. Come in and nod hello to a gun. An old familiar situation. I came in, but with a bang. Marlow was out cold with his fingers coiled around a gun. A gun I relieved him of. He came through, cursing himself. Stand away from the door. The next time you invite a fly into the web, sucker, you won't make out when you find it monotonous. Tell me. Samson used his own gun on himself. You know that I don't go for a gag as obvious as Samson's frame. Now get up, behave, and fill in the facts. Samson asked me to call on him for a talk. We had an argument. Sampson said if I didn't drop my lawsuit, he'd scandalize me as a mad dog murderer. I socked him one on the jaw. And Sampson grabbed a gun out of a desk drawer. And he said he'd frame me if I didn't sign papers swearing my claims to Sugarloaf mama were a fraud. He said he'd swear the gun was mine and that I'd come in to kill him. That he'd overpowered me and seized the gun after I'd fired at him. When I ran out, Sampson fired two shots. Not at me, at himself. He gave himself a flesh wound. Yeah, that's Samson all over. Anything for a buck. A hundred thousand bucks. Money belonging to me. He stole my song. You'll have your day in court. Yeah, with Samson's lying stenographer perjuring herself with a boss. Now that we're down to her. Where is she? Where is she? What are you talking? Susan Lane was kidnapped. Now what, framer? You and Samson are the interested parties. If she was for Samson, she was against you. So Only you'd have a motive in shutting off her testimony. It would appear if you arrange the snatch. Marlow, you're a sucker. Get out from under while you can. Rang off. I had nothing to do with it. How about an attempt on a life on the docks? Nope. You're incapable of it. I'm capable of it, but I didn't do it. You own a hat?

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Sure.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Why? Get it. I'm taking you to headquarters. What for? You'll only land on the floor again. To protect you against yourself. That wild gleam of your eye belongs under temporary lock and keys. I spent years writing a song, picking my brains, days, nights, starving in this filthy infested hole. So. That swindler Samson. Just what I mean. The Parite you're cooking at. You've got to explode. If you're really innocent of anything so far, I want to keep you that way. Walk in front of me. At police headquarters, Lt. Trav Rogers had sensational news. Son Lane. We think we fought. Up where? A shack up near Gun Hill Road overlooking the railroad yard. But how? Let's go get her, shall we? I'll tell you how. Another time. It was Susan Lane on the attic floor of a seedy looking frame dwelling. Trust hand and foot and dead to the world.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

She's asleep.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Here's how we were tipped. Whereabouts? The telephone. The receiver's off the hook. The girl squammed enough to roll against it and knock the receiver off. The operator became suspicious and called police. Right. Help me untie a Trev. I've got a pocket knife. Hey, Susan. Wake up. Susan. Me? Barry? She seems dopey. An overdose of sedatives, I'd say. Do you have any pupils? And their eyes, they. Somebody figured that asleep she couldn't make a disturbance.

[Susan Lee]

Where am I?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

In the arms of the law, baby.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

I never seen you this romantic, Craig.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

I've always had a soft spot for struggling stenographers. Let's all ride downtown now, huh? Riding downtown on the west side highway with Trav Rogers thumbing his nose at speed laws, Susan came around to 100% of herself to lean against me contentedly purring like kitten.

[Susan Lee]

I feel so good.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

You're making Trav's bachelorhood an awful load to bear. Hand holding will only get your palms sweating, Don Juan. Suppose we talk about the case, Craig. New talk. Samson and Marlow. One of them hired the kidnapper. What could Sampson's motive be? The same motive he had in shooting himself. Frame and discredit Marlowe in advance of that trial over that song? Possibility. But you don't buy it? Not right away. Oh. Take that exit and pull up to Pier 41. What for? It's the pier where the case began. Began for me.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

Some clue you missed there.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Reconstruct the crime. Isn't that standard? Approved routine. All right, brain. Pier 41. Susan.

[Susan Lee]

Yes?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Follow me. I'll need your help.

[Susan Lee]

All right.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

It began about here. I heard a cry for help. Is this about where you were when a masked somebody threw you into the river. Was?

[Susan Lee]

Yes, I think so.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Good. Now let's reenact it. Stand facing the river. Yes, I'm the masked mister. I steal up behind you. Grab a hold. Don't be ticklish. I hoist you into the air. So, Craig, do you have to be that realistic? I have to be. How else can I heave a cute little bundle like Susan into the drink? Craig, you a maniac. She can't swim. Oh, can't sch. But you saved her life in the first place. Yeah, that's what she wanted me to think. That was the hook and I swallowed it. She can't swim, huh? Look at that Australian crawl. She swims like a fish. Yeah, Good old will to self preservation. I was counting on that to convict her.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

What was her game?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Dramatize herself? Big make out her life was being attempted to bleed Samson for a big slice of those song profits. More than she's already got. Already got? When she climbs back on the pier, gander at a hunk of so called Mexican jewelry she's wearing, Appraise the ring of Tiffany and find out what a bonanza stenography can be. Poor or smart girl. Samson gave her the ring. A down payment for her perjury. But if the blackmail was set up so good, why embellish it with phony attempts on her life? And the kidnapping? Fear. Fear that Marlow could gun for her for lying for Sampson. Ditto Sampson. To keep her from telling the truth. Truth being that Marlow wrote Sugarloaf Mama. So? So by making herself a police problem, or my problem, that is, she scared Sampson and Marlow from daring to harm her.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

Clever.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Here she comes. Hello, baby.

[Susan Lee]

Oh, that was contemptible of you, Barry.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

A flaw in my cast. I'm so sorry. Just by the way, who was the atrocious kidnapper?

[Susan Lee]

My brother. My aunt is cold.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Where do you suggest we go?

[Susan Lee]

Your place?

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

No, it really wouldn't be proper this time. I'd be pinched for sequestering police property. Case solved. Only Trav Rogers didn't let me just walk away from it. At his insistence, I had it dragged down to headquarters to hunt and peck away at a typewriter. How's your detailed police report coming along, Barry? I'll be a month at it. The way I type. Sad. Why are we so suddenly so. So. Clerical regulation, section 6, paragraph 4, governing confidential operatives State. Spare me. But why in such a confounded hurry? Why right away, tonight? I've got flight tickets for St. Nick's Susan Lane's under arrest, thanks to you. I can't just book her. Not without a precise stipulation of charges. Then get me a competent typist. Sorry.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

They've all gone home.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Patience Parry. Just put one word after another or less for a case. I worked without a fee yet. Oh, by the way, why, speaking of fees. The fact is, Ms. Lane was sporting enough to worry about that. Are you kidding?

[Susan Lee]

No.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

No, I'm not. She said you were working for her. Even though it did boomerang for her. She hates to see you go empty handed, she says. Sweet of her, isn't it? Lacking fun. She gave you her dearest possession. Her finest jewel. This. This ring. Hey, why, Trent, the rock's worth five GS if it's a penny. I'm sure. And now if you'll hand it back. Hand it back? What for? Regulations governing extorted property. The girl, unfortunately, came by the ring dishonorably. You kill yourself. Good night, folks. See you next week.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

You have been listening to William Gargan in another exciting transcribed mystery drama from the adventures of Barry Craig, confidential investigator. Tonight's story, Song of Death, was written by John Robert. Next week it's the strange story titled Death of a Private Eye, about which Barry Craig has this to say.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Next week, I'm hired to help a man pay a visit, but discover instead that my client has a visitor first. That visitor being death. See you next week, folks.

[Lemaire (Janitor)]

Featured in the role of Susan was Amzy Strickland. Barry Craig, starring William Gargan was under the direction of Hyman Brown. This is Don Pardo speaking.

[Barry Craig (alternate segments)]

Now enjoy meredith wilson's music room on NBC.

[Caretaker Sam Billings]

Thanks for joining us at 1001 Radio Crime Solvers. Reviews are always appreciated. So if you have a moment, please do stop and send us one. Until next time, everyone stay safe and we'll be back soon.